#forgor to put his tags my bad

[tianhai03]

You've mentioned before that Dante is uncomfortable with his demonic heritage, do you want to talk about that?

should probably start off by showing where exactly we see his feelings abt being half demon, so here's where i got that from (this is from pg 249 of before the nightmare, the dmc5 prequel novel. you can find a pdf of it here):

there are other instances in the series where we get hints of him being uncomfortable abt his own demonic heritage, but afaik this is the most In Your Face one. it literally says right there. "he was sick of turning into something else."

it took dante a long, LONG time to get comfortable with his own powers. he probably didnt feel comfortable with it until he got his SDT in dmc5, because this was from his first encounter with urizen. he's been living with his demonic blood that gave him powers, the same power that saved his and many other people's lives, ever since he was born, and yet he was never comfortable with it. i think a lot of people forget abt that very often.

people only see dante when hes the wacky wahoo pizza man, because he rarely ever lets others see the real him; the dante who is probably so sick of the demonic blood running through his own veins he hated seeing himself, let alone his demonic form. i'm sure throughout his life he wished he was just some normal guy very often. it's exhausting having to constantly try to hide yourself from everyone else.

but hey! everything's fine and good now because he found his family again in 5, he finally learned how to accept both his human AND demonic blood as parts of himself (and got a cool new demon form out of it), and he's now on his way to kicking more demon ass with his brother while they fix their relationship. life's finally starting to look good for dante and i'm sure he's happier now :)

[tzeimi]

:D was tagged by @arwainian to do questions to know me better here we go

Last Song: stream GONER by jaboukie sound of the summer!! seriously cannot wait for his album its gonna be great

Currently Watching: primary thing right now honestly is rewatching wayner adiotv's chulip streams (good shit) bcos i needed something non-distracting while i painted, but also making my way through all of leverage at the moment!

Currently Reading: just the other day finished reading my new graphic novel prokaryote season by leofox. really love his art would highly recommend. also have had trigun stampede tab open for days, any second now my brains gonna let me start reading it just you wait

Current Obsession: its the easy answer but honestly im watching through black sails with like 3 different people right now so it is heavily on the mind. re-read through some of my favourite fics the other night, plus im making actual progress on an amv idea beyond simply rotating it in my mind so yeah. me when the sails are black. woag

tagging people i wanna know better! only if youd like to - @spacemancharisma @fryeryeryer @bongwater-supreme @gothmothboy @malvolios-yellow-stockings @cavehags @thurs-days plus literally anyone else who sees this and wants to do it. peace and love amen

[winterzsurprise]

Thirty Minutes || Miguel O'hara

Pairing: Miguel O'hara x F!reader

Summary: After convincing Miguel to take a break from working, he generously granted you thirty minutes with him and you know how you'd spend it.

Words: 1.7k

Tags: NOT BETA READ, smut, rough sex, vaginal fingering, overstimulation, multiple orgasm, squirting, big dick Miguel, standing sex, deep penetration, fang play, office sex (i guess?)

This is so rushed but he just do things to me. He breathes and I start giggling and twirling my hair. I am so feral for him I'm sorry (not sorry). I swear I'll bring more flavor next time :''DD

forgor to note that the glasses part is heavily inspired by that one scene from a kdrama named "Business Proposal".

hermosa - beautiful || cariño - honey || mi vida - my life || mi amor - my love

Being the leader of the inter-dimensional spider hub, it's expected for Miguel to be drowning with tasks and reports to analyze at any time of day. You accepted that fact when you started dating him on the down low.

You didn't care that he's busy since your time is also taken by fighting crimes and eventual missions. Plus, at the end of the day, the make up sex is godly.

But you find it hard to tolerate it when days and nights blurs without him leaving his office unless he needs to eat and use the bathroom.

Apparently, Jessica has held a few interventions for him with Peter B. and it failed every time. Miguel threw them out and threatened to shut Layla down if she didn't block their access to his office.

Passing by you in the lobby after another mission, Peter B. asked you with a stern look while Mayday babbled, mirroring the seriousness of her dad.

"Please do anything to get him to leave his office. I beg of you."

So after dinner where there's less activities and presence in the hub, you head straight to his office with barely a plan in mind. Clearly confident you'd make the man rest, even for fifteen minutes.

The hatch parts open and you are met by the image of him reading out a report in formal clothing and square glasses, sitting at the edge of the platform. He briefly looked up from the report before returning back to his task.

"Let me guess, Peter sent you here?"

"I heard they've already hosted a couple of interventions and rallies."

Miguel huffed, pitching the bridge of his nose. "Such a waste of time, they could have been in their home world watching over their cities."

"Come on, you know that they're just concerned about you."

"And you're here because you're also concerned?"

You laughed, webbing onto the ceiling and pulling yourself up to land beside him. “Are you really going to act this way, Miguel?”

Miguel didn’t respond, focusing on reading on the report about the paper Doc Ock variant found in Earth 2199 written by the Victorian Spider-Man. You settled on sitting next to him in silence after retracting your suit back.

His subtle glances on your skin tight shorts didn't go unnoticed but you ignored it in favor of 

You took the time to observe the man whose bulky body is covered in a simple  dress shirt with three buttons down and black pants that complemented the thickness of his thighs. The square glasses sitting on the bridge of his nose only added more flavor to his attire.

He's criminally dashing.

After being away for days to catch an anomaly and crime fighting in your own world, you couldn't ignore the simmering desire bubbling in your abdomen.

How could you not be when your darling looks like a five star Michelin meal in front of you?

Your attention seemed to bother Miguel, who let out a defeated sigh. “Alright, what do you want?”

“I just want to spend time with you, is that so bad?”

Miguel deadpanned at you, seemingly disturbed by the thought before putting the reports down and turning to face you fully with his arms crossed. His eyes scanned your form up and down, letting his head fall back before groaning.

“Alright, I’ll bite. You got thirty minutes.”

You grinned. "That's all I need."

He raised an eyebrow at that but before he could question it, you captured his lips with yours. As if the kiss was a droplet on the water, the ripples caused by the taste of his lips awakened the lust simmering in the pit of your stomach.

His hands found your hips and pulled you close until you rediscovered your rightful seat on his thighs. Rough and calloused touch sneaked past your top and crawled up to the swell of your breast.

Miguel pulled away, removing his glasses—quite erotically—before diving back to lose himself in your lips.

"Is this what you plan on using your thirty minutes for?"

"You know it'll last longer than thirty."

"I doubt that."

His words sent jolts of pleasure down your spine, igniting your nerve endings alight.

"Are you really going to fuck me in your office, boss?"

"Don't 'boss' me, hermosa and you know I'd spread you open no matter the location."

His hands unclasped the front of your bras and spared no time in covering your flesh with his. The rough texture of his palm rubbing against your firm nipples got you moaning, hips twisting in his thighs desperate for stimulation.

Pulling away, Miguel's lips fell to your throat, his tongue roamed the skin above your heartbeat that rose when his razor sharp teeth grazed your flesh, threatening to pierce. With the soft suckles on your neck and the rough massage on your mounds, you were a moaning mess, tugging helplessly on his hair and grinding pathetically on him.

"You're so desperate for me, mi amor. Did you miss me that much?"

"Shut up and just touch me, please."

He groaned, deep. "You sound so adorable when you beg, baby."

He quickly made work of your shirt, tossing it along with your bra before moving to tugging your shorts off. Your hands busies itself with his dress pants, desperate to feel the heat of his skin against your own and to feel the curve of his girth once more.

It didn't take long before you're both naked and bare to anyone who dares enter his chambers. A shrill excitement electrifies your skin at the thought of being caught, the riskiness of being discovered and seen being devoured by the man you love oddly arouses you further.

Though you're sure with how possessive he is, Miguel has already shut the gates to anyone till he's done with you.

But it was an interesting thought to have while his three of his fingers savagely thrusts in and out of your hole, the other hand grounding your hips made it impossible to escape the onslaught of pleasure after pleasure striking your nerves down, you screamed, clawing at his broad back as he fingered you open.

Miguel grunts. "Scream louder for me, mi vida. I want to hear how good I make you feel."

His thumb found your clit and started drawing figures of eight on them, the knot in your abdomen twists tighter as you climb towards your orgasm. There's a wet squelch building up to bounce in the chamber and you flush red yet Miguel took it as a compliment, increasing his speed and curling three fingers upwards more.

Your legs shook violently from where they stood beside his wide thighs before the knot unfurled and you came with a shout, trembling pathetically in his hold. The sudden onslaught of serene euphoria makes you light-headed and you rest your forehead on his shoulder.

He pulled away, choosing to be merciful and let your shaking figure settle down before continuing.

"You didn't squirt? What a shame."

"F-fuck you."

"Don't lie, cariño." There's a grin in his voice as he pulls you flush to him. "I know you like it when I leave you writhing pathetically."

Not sparing any second, he stands up and you wrap your arms around his neck, already sensing his plan as he reaches down to line the tip of dick with your sopping heat. The sensation of his girth so near your entrance re-igniting the suffocating arousal and desire in your body.

"And god, do I miss seeing you cock-drunk and shaking."

Plunging in deep, your mouth falls and you scream. The hilt of his girth grazing your uterus along with the burn of the stretch sparking every nerve endings alight. The familiar feeling of his cock reminding your hole who it belongs to made you feel dizzy, it was too much but it feels so good.

His thrusts are unforgiving, rattling your soul every time his hips collide with yours, leaving you breathless and moaning unintelligible words. His fangs digs into the crook of your neck as he pants and groans into your skin.

The sensation of your pebbled nipples rubbing against his chest sends electric shocks down your spine, adding onto your quick climb to your high.

You could barely make out the Spanish words he's whispering like a prayer, mind fogged with nothing but the pure nirvana he was handing to you. 

"Fuck, you feel so good for me. Always so sweet and tight for me, yeah?"

"Yes yes yes…!"

One of his hands grabbed hold of your jaw, forcing you to meet his dark red eyes. "You're not leaving this fucking room until I'm done with you, understand?"

You nod vigorously, wanting nothing but to please him enough to reward you with another orgasm. His lips found your neck once more, nibbling on your skin and teasingly dragging his fangs in his conquest to mark you, which shook you from your stupor, pushing his head away.

"No-not too much. It'll show."

Miguel's eyebrow raised, unfazed. "And?"

"T-they'll find out."

He scoffed. "I don't fucking care. Let them know who fuck you well and bare."

Angling his hips, he grazes a spot and you cry before the next plunge hits it, your legs began to shake around him with every thrust. Tears blurred your vision as pleasure invaded your very being, it didn't take long before you burst in his arms, your arousal painting his clenched stomach.

"That's it. Give it to me."

Ramping his speed, you howled. Pain started to mix with euphoria but you couldn't stop, it's not enough to satiate your famished soul. 

"F-fuck…! I-I don't think I can a-anymore."

You squealed at the sharp stinging pain left by his hand on your clit. "You will and I'll make sure of it."

Palming your bead more gently than his savage thrusts, he tightened the coil in your stomach tighter and tighter until it exploded and splattered once more unto his glistening abs, legs writhing helplessly in the air.

With the unbearable tightness of your velvet walls around his dick, Miguel soon followed. Hot liquid arousal painting your insides white with every pulse of his dick. You groaned at the familiar feeling of fullness before wincing at the pain of overstimulation.

Slapping his back, you whined. "I'm so fucking sore and you'll make me walk out by myself. How fucking cruel of you."

Miguel grumbled, catching his breath as he sat you both down on the floor.

"Who said you're leaving, cariño?"

[qierxing]

Xing, what's your thoughts about Rollo? Do you think you'll write about him at some point? I'm a bit curious since he does have interesting aspects. Also are you okay with me tagging you in game tags--

Hi Rain :3c You totes can tag me, if i don't get back, just know that my bad memory forgor TT

Rollo...if I'm going to be honest, when the design broke out on the JP side, and everyone was reblogging his pic all over my dash, I legit thought it was a joke or fanart of some kind. After realizing it was real I lost my mind a little. WE'RE GAJINKA-ING THE HOMOPHOBIC WHITE SUPREMACIST PRIEST FROM DISNEY??? SURE, OKAY??? ANYTHING GOES AT THIS POINT

Now that I've played the first chapter of the GloMas event, it's REALLY eerie seeing how they put all the mannerisms of Frollo onto him. The ring, the tapping of his pointer finger when he crosses his arms, the way he chuckles/laughs, and deadpan face(and the quirk of his eyebrow?!).....it certainly is jarring to see it on the screen.

I know the gist of his character and story from JP spoilers and stuff, but I can't really say I know everything or the depth of his character quite yet. That said, I have a mini idea in mind regarding him and a young and upstart mage who is down on their luck in getting the resources and lessons they need to really shine, and works in the cafe Rollo frequents to make ends meet (and to get into an arcane academy of their dreams. bonus points if it's NRC college—more salt in the wound). Rollo simply assumes the sweet barista at the counter is magic less like most other citizens in Fleur City, but what he doesn't know is that your magic prowess is nearly on the same level of high level mages. You resent him for his privilege in being in NBA, he thinks you're one of the purest beings upon Twisted Wonderland. May the Righteous Judge have mercy on you if he finds out the truth behind your customer service smile.

[hawkewatching]

Dark Sun (Arthur Harrow x Reader)

Chapter 2: Do You Know Me? (7,014 words)

Previous Links: Chapter 1 (Please check chapter 1 for any warnings and tags if you're interested, they are the same here)

Rated Mature for dark themes and some strong language.

Summary:

"You can walk away if you want, I wouldn’t stop you. But you won’t.”

What happens when he gets close? Do you want to test that? Do you want to test yourself?

A/N: My bad yall I kinda forgor to post, the only thoughts about this fic that I've had for two weeks is about finally finishing the current chapter I'm working on (chapter 15 hits AO3 in a couple of days, if you're waiting on that watch that space). Also I gotta say my favourite part of posting here is picking a slightly tangentially-related pic for the top, I always remember my thought processes for these chapters so they evoke scenes and ideas that I drew upon here. Iirc this chapter was written about July/August 2022, I remembering suffering from mega writer's block while working on this. I suffered so bad to write this one at the time. So enjoy it, enjoy my favourite bad bad man, I'm so in love with him it hurts.

~~~

Why is he here? He isn’t supposed to be here.

The sound of crunching glass immediately strikes fear into you, even if it is only momentary. No amount of exposure to it can make you used to it. Even though you don’t negatively associate the presence that accompanies it, something about how it sounds can never be spun in a positive light in your mind.

You had been previously leaning over a cardboard box of your belongings, packing up and ready to move out of the small flat that you’d previously called home. When you looked behind you, following the sound, you saw a sight that you knew to expect but hadn’t quite prepared for.

Harrow was leaning in your doorway, still holding on to that cane as if it helped at all. He looked exactly the same as when you’d first met him a few days prior, right down to the clothes. You hadn’t forgotten a single thing about him, and you should have welcomed the familiar sight, but something prevented you. You couldn’t remember if you’d ever told him where you lived, and he certainly hadn’t been invited.

You raised an eyebrow, suspicious of his sudden appearance. “Are you going to help or are you just going to watch?” You asked, only half sarcastic.

He tilted his head. “From my understanding it appears that you’ve already done most of the heavy lifting.”

“True, I could have done with you randomly showing up here an hour ago.” That was fully sarcastic, and you looked away from him to close up the box you were handling.

He began to take some steps forward, and you tried to hide your own repulsion to that sound that always followed him. “I apologise, I just wanted to oversee things.” He sounded genuine, but at the same time a little distant, noticing that you still looked at him with distrust.

You narrowed your eyes, watching him as he now stood next to you. The way he looked down at you made for an unintentionally intimidating presence that you refused to back down on. You tried to hide your feelings with a scoff and an unenthused smile. “What’s that supposed to mean? I wasn’t going to bail.”

His smile, which was supposed to be reassuring, only served to further stoke your rebellious flames. “I didn’t think you would.”

Finally, you became serious, unsure of his exact intentions. “I don’t need you to worry about me.” You insisted, but something didn’t seem to convince him.

“It wouldn’t hurt to have me worrying about you.” You were unable to hide your confusion when he put a hand on your shoulder, but it was only momentary when one of his damned smiles began to put you at ease. You didn’t mind him doing that, even if you didn’t understand it.

You could only look at him, not knowing how to reply to that. You didn’t really know what it meant, and didn’t dare ask. Given that context, you somewhat appreciated his unexpected company.

He leaned in and moved forward, with your response immediately being to brace yourself for whatever was to come. However, you were surprised to see him go around you instead. The rasp of his voice was next to left ear.

“It’s not too much further, but don’t get lost, alright?” Harrow asked. The question sounded almost playful, but you didn’t know how to respond to the game.

Pinned to the spot, you didn’t dare follow him with your gaze, but his sounds more than indicated him circling around you. He’d said his part, and you saw him again when he’d finished that lap, returning to where he had been a moment before.

He looked at you with a warm stare, a smile only just present. Your nervousness began to disappear at the sight. For once, you felt able to lower your guard. It felt safe.

What was this? Trust? On both our parts?

You only wished to know why he would do all of this for you, but as always, he was a total mystery. A mystery you hoped this new chapter of your life would solve.

***

Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap.

Anticipation was already eating at you as it was. That was enough torture for you. You didn’t need the addition of those sounds, which you thought you had escaped, getting to you through the walls. Not even the source being in another room could prevent you from having to experience it all over again.

It had been a week since you’d settled into this place. Your experience so far had been pretty good. Harrow’s promises had turned out not to be empty. Although you were still adjusting, you had found this environment to be welcoming, and the people rather kind. They weren’t like their leader at all, they all seemed… normal. When that realisation hit you, you didn’t feel so out of place anymore, and you had found great comfort in that.

Now, you were waiting in a hallway, the hot sun beaming through the windows straight onto you, not helping the already awkward situation. Directly across from you was the room that Harrow was supposed to be in. Well, there was no doubt that he was in it. You had been told that he wanted to see you, and that never really boded well.

You had already seen him a lot, but never in a context like this. Usually, he came to you. He would do that a lot, actually. You never objected to his company, sometimes you welcomed it. If you were alone, he always made sure that it was never for long. He didn’t seem to do this for other people, and they had noticed. No one had a definitive answer to explain that.

Something about the way he is just doesn’t sit right.

He would just sit with you and listen, but the conversation was awkward. He never talked about himself, and you had a hard time talking about yourself, so it mostly boiled down to talking about whatever seemed to be happening on that particular day. It wasn’t exactly riveting, but it was something? Regardless, you were running out of ground to cover. Something had to give. You knew there was something deeper, he had to have a motivation, but that was totally unknown to you.

He had stopped moving. You sighed loudly, trying to fill the eerie silence with something else. The moment was short-lived though, and almost as quickly as it disappeared you could hear him walking again.

Before you had time to process that, there was a clicking of a lock and one of the large, wooden doors that served as the room’s entrance opened a crack. Through it, you could see half of his face, and half of a warm smile.

“You’re here. Come in.” His enthusiasm surprised you, and you could tell he was happy to see you. You just weren’t sure why.

Once he had finished speaking, he just watched you, waiting for your move. You followed him, deliberately cautious. When you got close to the door, he pulled it open for you, revealing a large room that, while spacious, felt claustrophobic with its low-hanging lights and various items stacked up against the walls from top to bottom.

Harrow was shuffling towards the back, where a corner was stacked with sturdy, waist-high boxes. Littered there were various unknown, shiny objects. Drawn to those like a crow, he didn’t pay you much mind for a moment. You’re unable to find the same fascination, but everything around you looks alien to you.

You looked away from him for only a moment to try to better understand your surroundings, but right on cue, he opened his mouth, immediately making you whip your head back around in his direction.

“How are you taking to this place?” The question tumbles out of his mouth innocently. He didn’t even look at you, but somehow, you felt as if he was still staring right through you.

You tried not to let it get to you. “It’s good.” You replied.

He gives a satisfied hum, and for a moment, you’re tricked into thinking that would be all he would say on the matter. Before you can get comfortable, he takes a sharp breath that sets the tone. “Is it… helping?” He stares you down, hiding an eagerness for your answer. The pressure was on.

You recognised the way he looked at you. You’d seen it before. He’d looked like that in your first conversation, you remembered the flash in his eyes that he’d tried to hide. The ever-veiled threat.

Don’t be honest, tell him everything is fine.

You ignored the pleas of your own mind. Dismissed it as paranoia. You could trust him, or at least, you wanted to. For better or for worse, he had compelled you to be honest, but in your shame, you couldn’t look at him. “It’s too soon to say, I think.”

When you picked up the courage to glance his way again in the silence that followed, you could tell that wasn’t what he wanted to hear. His unblinking stare, the way his hands seemed to grasp tighter around that cane, all set off your mind’s warning sirens. But nothing on his expressionless face portrayed that. It appeared almost as a blank canvas, preparing to paint whichever response he deemed most appropriate.

Whatever plan he had, he’s changing it.

Your curiosity got the better of you. “What is all of this, anyway?” The question slips out of your mouth before you have time to fully evaluate the situation, your eyes darting around the room at all of the strange objects.

“Just items I’ve collected in my research.” He replied coolly, picking up an object that flashed gold in the light so brightly that you couldn’t quite tell what it was. “Most of these things are dead ends, but I find there’s no harm in keeping them, just in case.” He handled it with great care, carefully placing it back down. It didn’t quite match with the disinterested tone of his voice.

“And what about all of those?” You pointed to the back wall of the room, where some large - your first instinct was to call them boxes - but they were much more elaborate than that, were shoved into the corner, as if hidden. The longer your eyes lingered on them, the more you were able to discern that their size and shape seemed disturbingly human.

That idea didn’t make you totally comfortable, but you kept a cool head. Your better instinct, starting to understand his antics, knew to give him nothing to work with. You couldn’t let him have control of the game.

He didn’t even look at the subject of the conversation. His eyes instead locked with yours, the corner of his mouth twitching with indecision.

I’ve got you.

You could tell he knew how to pick his battles, but in choosing not to respond he had also admitted defeat. You had managed to call him out, and while that was a small personal victory, it was quickly followed with the realisation that your first examination must have been correct, and the implications were staggering. You could almost respect his ability to always come out on top in these conversations, if you weren’t the one always losing.

Under the weight of that realisation, your voice became hesitant. “Those aren’t what I think they are.”

Finally, he found his smile. “That would depend on what you think they are.” Now you’d given him something. Harrow leaned forward on his cane, completely calm. You thought you had caught him, but the indifference hadn’t shifted one bit. “I didn’t kill any of them, you know.” He stated.

You scoffed with sarcasm. “Yeah, sure.”

He wandered over to the bodies, brushing a hand over the nearest one. “You’d be surprised how many ancient Egyptians were buried with objects of immense value.” His words were a little quieter than usual, as if his mind was distracted.

You dare to take a step closer, standing next to him and looking down at his hand, now tracing the shape of what you assumed to be legs. “Went for a spot of grave robbing, did you?” You felt daring, confidence boosted by your minor win, and sought to further touch a nerve in him, but it didn’t seem to have any effect.

“I suppose you could say that. It made for some fascinating adventures, really.” He gave a small smile, and looked sentimental. You assumed that the thoughts that had made him distant in the moment were driven by nostalgia, and chose, despite the temptation, not to judge. He seemed to snap back into reality, a much more focused gaze now directed back at you. “But I’m past that point now. There’s not much exploring left to do.” He said that with real conviction, leaving you with no more questions.

The way he looked at you made you feel awkward, and you continued to apply the sarcasm. It was the only way you could express your distaste. “That’s great, I’m sure those dead people would prefer to remain undisturbed.”

You almost envied his ability to take all of the criticism levied at him without as much as a complaint. You had insulted just about everything he stood for and he didn’t seem to care one bit. He couldn’t be swayed.

That can only mean that he hides a terrifying level of commitment. You should be afraid of that.

You ignored your own thoughts, dismissing your own imagination as just overactive. You knew this already, yet you were still here.

Harrow was, as you knew him to be, unflappable. You could see the side of his face, and a smile creeping up it. “It’s all for a good cause. After all, if you try to hide something, it will always be found, eventually.” His face darkened during his last sentence, the instant seriousness putting you on edge. He turned, slowly but suddenly, and caused you to flinch as his intense gaze sliced through you. “They simply had it coming.”

You felt thoroughly intimidated, and tried to deconstruct his possible motivations, for you knew he’d wanted this response from you. It seemed like a reminder that you were playing with fire, and you were so, so close to being burnt.

Does he know something? Who am I kidding, he ALWAYS knows.

You suddenly began to remember how you even ended up here. Of course he wanted you for something. “Why did you want to see me?” You asked cautiously.

He seemed amused by that, as if you should have known the answer yourself. “I just wanted to talk. Properly. We haven’t been able to do that just yet.” Harrow tilted his head. The friendly sincerity that had followed him on the first night you’d met him had properly returned.

You gave him a look of confusion. “It’s not like we haven’t spoken-”

“Speaking and talking are two different things.” He cut you off, and while glancing down on you in a condescending manner, his tone doesn’t change, making for a creepy contrast. “You don’t seem very interested in doing the latter.”

Is this… impatience?

That seemed out of character for him. Curiosity began to get the better of you again, even though you seemed convinced that it would assure your downfall. You had a desire to outplay his games, but the line between beating him and playing into his hands was becoming increasingly blurred.

You gave a crafty smile, but spoke as if disinterested. It was the kind of contrast you could pick on, so you had no doubt in your mind that he had observed it too. “It’s not that I’m not interested, it’s that I don’t know how to.”

And you fucking scare me.

“Well, how about a lesson?”

The way he looked at you and the way he asked made him sound so innocent, but the demand was hidden under there. You couldn’t say no to him, even though you knew you should. It didn’t seem like an option.

“What would that be?” You asked, trying to suppress your feelings,

You couldn’t take his eyes off of him as he began to approach you, locked in place. Whatever was coming, you had to accept it. This was what he had wanted.

You only hoped he wasn’t asking too much of you.

He scoffed, a small smile forming. He acted like the answer was obvious. “You have to learn to accept help.” He leaned down a little to get on your level. “I am trying to help you.”

Perhaps it was the way he looked at you, that stare that always made you nervous. Or perhaps it was that he had all the energy of a teacher scolding a child. Something about his offer didn’t work for you. You gritted your teeth in annoyance. “You’re not doing a very good job of it.”

Your comment amused him, but he only lets that be known for a flash before he turned more serious. “That’s because it’s a two-way street. If you give me nothing, I can’t give you anything either.”

“What do you want from me, then?”

You expected his intentions to be suspicious. Every time you felt like you could trust him, he did something to change your mind, and you could tell he was doing all of this because he wanted something. There had to be an ulterior motive.

He gave an exasperated sigh, as if your questioning had tired him out. “I just want you to talk to me. That’s all I want. Nothing else.”

You couldn’t bring yourself to reply, only watching as he stared right through you, as if waiting. For the first time, you weren’t objecting to his games out of choice, but out of confusion, totally clueless on what your next move should be.

Your silence must have surprised him, as he scoffed, but the advance warning did not prepare you for the volume of the chuckle that followed. “I want to know how to help you, I want to know how to fix your problems, and I want to see you more.” A relieved smile formed after his words.

He means it.

Despite your racing mind, you didn’t give away any emotion, and forced something, anything out of your mouth. “Why?” You asked softly.

Harrow looked towards the window for a beat, head tilting as he seemed to think. When the words came to him, he faced your way again, and you observed that he’d dropped the seriousness and the distance. There was something warm about his energy. He no longer looked past you, but at you. “Because letting you go would be a waste. A waste of someone good. Not just for the world, but…” He let out a long, drawn-out sigh, purposefully delaying the rest of his words. “For me.”

Suddenly, everything began to make sense. Somehow, this outcome had never crossed your mind. You hadn’t expected it. Perhaps you’d thought too much of him.

He’s not helping me, he’s helping himself?

You couldn’t help but wonder if all of this had been for his own ends. That you had simply been used. All of the promises he had made to you felt hollow. It made you feel sick. This was a trap.

In your confusion, you hesitated before getting your words out, nearly choking on them. “Do I really need to be here, or did you just want me to be here?”

The way he looked at you hadn’t changed, but in a new context he still appeared as distant as ever, even with the still-present smile.

Fuck! How does he feel nothing? He has to know what he’s done.

He straightened himself up a little, looking down on you. “That’s entirely up to you. You can walk away if you want, I wouldn’t stop you. But you won’t.” The smile seemed to more naturally fit to a newfound smug confidence, certain that he had read you like a book.

His conviction in your own feelings disgusted you. “You don’t know me.” You scowled.

He hummed, almost in agreement. “I know all of this is helping you.”

A tidal wave of emotions was overcoming you, too many too quickly to decide on one. It was the opposite to Harrow, calm and firmly decided on whatever that strange mind had settled on. You began to raise your voice: “Do not pretend to know me. How do I know you’re not acting selfishly? I-”

Knock, knock.

You gave a loud sigh, the knocks having completely ruined your train of thought. You could see, as always, that he was giving you nothing. Even now, when you’d tried to make an impact, you couldn’t break through his defences.

There’s a flash of irritation in his eyes at the idea of being interrupted, but as soon as a woman appears at the door, another disciple, it disappears. He appears to immediately understand the importance of whatever is to come.

“We just heard back from our contact in the Alps. They’ve agreed to your terms for the exchange.”

“That’s great news. Thank you.” His smile is warm and genuine, but the woman seems to register a subtle indication that his matter with you is private and swiftly leaves. He stared at the door, left ajar, his mind far more focused on the news he had just received.

After a beat of no response, he slowly approaches the door.

Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Cr-

Harrow slammed the door shut, turning to you now with a different expression. His eyes narrowed and darkened, and his offence was clear. For a moment, you felt something shift in the air. For the first time, you truly felt his power. You didn’t know the extent of it, as far as you’d seen and heard, it was stronger than it seemed, and the mystery of that was too much to bear. Anxiety suddenly began to eat at your stomach, afraid of his next move.

“Don’t assume I’m acting selfishly.” He growled, but in the span of a breath he had recomposed himself. All of a sudden his expression shifted in the blink of an eye, turning distant, unoffended. The same as usual, especially when you felt those ever-analytical eyes once again staring you down. He was far too good at hiding his feelings, but you wished to never find out again what he could possibly be thinking. He continued softly, thinly veiling a condescending tone: “That's almost insulting. I would never bring you into something that I didn’t think would be good for you.”

In that moment, you realised why he didn’t seem fazed at all by your negative reaction. Somehow, you were still playing his game. This is what he had expected. You were cornered, at this point, and the only solution left was to follow your heart, hoping that would help you escape.

He knows your heart.

“Forgive me for the insult.” You said sarcastically, not caring how he would respond, but still observing his unblinking gaze that didn’t even seem to register your comment. It unnerved you, and you folded your arms in an attempt to preserve your deteriorating defiant act. “I wouldn’t have that problem if I actually knew who the hell you were.”

He tilted his head with a smile, your words seeming to have the opposite of their intended effect on him. “I see how it is. It’s a matter of trust. That’s a starting point.” He sat down across from you, fingers stroking the head of the cane as he held it between his legs. That seemed to be a subconscious act, because his gaze did not once break from you. “Tell me, why don’t you trust me?”

You hated how genuine his question was, because you had long learned the lesson that always, somehow, Harrow already had every answer he ever needed.

“You already know.” You spat.

“I might.”

You gave him a nasty look for that comment, your contempt too great to suppress.

He responded to your stare with one of his own, but as per usual, he was seemingly immune to your efforts, continuing on as if your gaze hadn’t interrupted him. “I want to hear it from your perspective. Lay it all out.”

You raised an eyebrow, finding yourself leaning sideways on a table, sick of standing. “Only if you do the same.”

He paused for a moment, taking the time for a slow blink. You imagined that the gears of his mind must have been turning at your proposal, but his face did everything in its power to hide that. The silence betrayed the truth, though. With a deep breath and a shuffle as he straightened himself up, almost mirroring you as he leaned forwards and balancing on his own cane, he had prepared his answer.

“That seems reasonable.”

I didn’t expect that.

Even though you were surprised, you’d already rehearsed in your mind what you’d say to him. You’d been doing that for a week. You tried to take a trick out of his book and not betray that you had to think a little, though. With him, you knew that one wrong word and he’d play around it so expertly you’d never get this chance again. “Alright. I don’t trust you because I don’t understand you.”

He tilted his head in an almost adorable display of curiosity. “What don’t you understand?”

“Anything.” Your frustration started to come through as you spoke. “Why you are the way that you are.”

For a moment, he glanced away from you again, something you assumed to be a tell when he didn’t quite know what to say. When he spoke, any sense of uncertainty disappeared. He didn’t appear to be capable of seeming unsure. “There are some things in this world far beyond any of us, and if one was to cross paths with such things, they could break you in ways most of us could only imagine to be possible. For me, that happened long before all of this.” Although it was out of your field of view, you could hear him softly tap his cane against the wood.

You took a moment to process his words, suddenly brimming with curiosity. “What do you mean?”

He gave a dry chuckle. “You’ll probably find it unbelievable.”

Despite everything you had seen, your mind’s first instinct was to believe that he was simply making excuses, trying to dodge the question. He hadn’t been open about it in the past, which had only made you want to know more. There was something hidden in his heart that he was teasing you with. You snorted, dwelling on his words again. “Try me.”

This time, there was no telling moment of pause, his stare cutting right through you. “I was once under direct servitude of a god, who used that position to abuse me. He broke me completely, then left me all alone to pick up the pieces.”

His bluntness on this topic surprised you. This was a lot to throw in so quickly, and it seemed like he knew that.

“I was stuck, trapped fighting a worthless cause for years, all while the voice inside my head tried its hardest to bend me to its will. I was forced to commit unspeakable acts of violence, all in the name of real justice.” He spat those last words, face twisting to one that appeared to be of genuine disgust and pain. For the first time, the Harrow you knew looked somewhat vulnerable. “It never was. Hurting the people who deserved that after the fact never stopped any more pain from being inflicted.”

Guilt. You felt his, and the sudden appearance of your own. He had this appearance of something untouchable, and while you always knew it to be a carefully crafted image, it had achieved its intended effect. Hidden under all of that was something that was hurting a lot. More pain that you felt you could possibly understand. There was a real, deep history here. Even with how crazy it all sounded, you could tell by the way that he felt that it all had to be true. And that meant…

You had to stop yourself from speaking while your thoughts caught up, looking right at him as you saw his face slowly recover from the feelings that had taken over it before. “Everything this group believes…” These tales of gods aligned with everything you’d been hearing, and you knew what that meant. “It’s all real, isn’t it?”

“As real as you and me.” He found a smile again, standing up. His feet shifted on the glass, which must have brought some pain, but he didn’t show it. ”I knew you’d come around eventually. We have an opportunity now to correct our mistakes.”

As he took another step closer, you watched him carefully, eyes narrowed with suspicion. “I think you mean your mistakes.”

“No. We’re all guilty.” He replied with total confidence, his voice once again shifting into something more serious. “Why are you here, really? You’ve made mistakes, haven’t you?” His questioning was a bit too antagonising for your tastes.

You didn’t say anything, knowing full well that you were both aware of the answer.

“For some of us, it’s not too late to walk a better path. You’ve got room for a second chance.” There was something reassuring to his words, and despite everything about him, you had no reason to doubt that particular statement, but he cut off any chance for a response with a sigh. “For myself, it’s not as clear. But you never know if you don’t try, do you?”

The talk of himself piqued your interest again. “I don’t get it. Why claim to fight all evil yet preach about second chances? If your actions were so unspeakable, why do you go unpunished?”

For a moment, he doesn’t give any reaction at all, seemingly thrown off by the question. When the answer comes, it appears with no hesitation. You can tell he’s pondered this question before. “I do punish myself. And on judgement day, if I am deemed unworthy… so be it. I accept my fate.”

He shifted his weight and you heard it. His punishment. The fanatic part of him was showing, you knew it had been hidden somewhere. This talk was insane, and served to remind you why you had been so apprehensive.

He’ll try to make you forget this.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you failed to respond, giving him the green light to not only continue with his words, but to approach until he was standing right next to you. “I’m willing to do that for the people who deserve heaven on earth. All that is required of you here is to be ready and waiting for that day. If you make it…” He put his hand on your shoulder, his warm touch surprising you. “It’ll be a little more worth it.”

There it is.

You felt doubt wash over you, refusing to believe that he spoke the truth. Not only because you didn’t hold yourself that high, but because you found yourself distrustful of his words. They were too kind, especially coming from him.

You could only look up at him, mouth agape. With a sigh, you composed yourself. “I doubt I make that much of a difference.”

He leaned in closer, an advance you did not reject, until his face was close to yours. His watery eyes hadn’t been this close before, and they looked at your own instead of through them. “You undervalue yourself.” He told you almost in a whisper, trying to be reassuring.

His words almost worked, and you giggle at the thought of them being true. “You overvalue me.”

He finds your reply entertaining for a moment, but his face quickly drops, and you can feel a finger or two in your hair. “Maybe. But you seem to think that you don’t matter, which simply isn’t true. People do value you.” He spoke with utter conviction, enough to make the back of your mind believe him.

“And who would those people be?” You questioned, hoping to hear what you knew he was thinking from his own mouth, but when he didn't respond, you realised your mistake. He doesn’t need to say anything, for he knows the same thing that you do: Your question has already been answered.

You took half of a step backwards away from him, and he follows your cue to break away. His face flashes with concern for a moment, and you didn’t miss it. You decided to make your question more specific. “Why do you care so much about me?”

He doesn’t think about his response for very long at all. “That’s a question I don’t know the answer to.”

His bluntness greatly surprised you. Him not appearing to know something surprised you more. “That’s a first.” Your sarcasm is kinder this time, unable to help yourself at making a jab that wasn’t necessarily deserved in your mind.

Of course, he doesn’t care how you’ve spoken, just that you have, and he takes a moment this time to get his words right. “I’ve spent a great deal of my life keeping people at a distance. I have a track record of hurting people in every way imaginable. I think perhaps I’m finally at the point where I’m no longer afraid of that.” Just like when talking about his past, there’s something shockingly sincere in his voice.

You caught onto his wording, hoping that he hadn’t thought that through in the moment. You knew that was a naïve thought. That realisation causes you to betray your concern. “You don’t hurt people anymore?”

“I don’t hurt them as much.” He replied callously.

That does not instil confidence. You wanted to chastise him for such a mindset, or even ask for elaboration, but your first and foremost thoughts are self-centred. “What about me?”

An opportunistic glint in his eye appeared after you asked. Before he even began to speak, you know that this is a moment he had been waiting to pounce on. “That brings me to why I summoned you here. I need to test you.”

“Test me how exactly?” You weren’t sure why you asked, because you already knew full well where he was going.

“The same way that I’m sure you’re familiar with.” The words tumbled out. He seemed much more focused on you, eyes glancing up and down over you. When his gaze calms down, he continues. “You were paying attention before, weren’t you?” He may have smiled, but you couldn’t tell if that was a joke or a threat.

For better or for worse, you remembered everything. “You said you didn’t force this on people.” You replied concernedly.

The proof that you had been listening previously strengthens his conviction. “Sometimes there are exceptions. And I need to know.”

“You need to know what?”

“If I’m right about you.” You could barely hear his words as he took a step closer, half overcome by nervousness and half because he had practically whispered that. He gave you a reassuring smile, but it only appeared for half a second.

You felt frozen as you felt him grab onto your wrists. You had been too busy watching his face to watch his arms, and from the point of contact you vow not to make that mistake again. He was surprisingly gentle and delicate with you, even taking great care to place the cold and strange-feeling cane between your own arms, but you knew from the way he looked at you warmly that this was out of a desire to make you feel comfortable with this process, almost as if he foresaw that you'd be afraid. You wondered if he was like that with everyone in his clutches. Out of pure discomfort, you couldn’t look back at him-

“Don’t look away. Look at me.” There’s no warmness left in his voice. It’s a demand.

You hated how he had basically read your mind. Confused, you felt you had no choice but to obey him. Something was happening, out of the corner of your eye there was movement from his arm and you could feel that cane move in some strange fashion, but his grip on you gradually tightened, and you didn’t dare to disobey him.

After what felt like an eternity, you felt his hold loosen. He breathed a sigh of relief, and then, all of a sudden, before you could react, he went in for a hug. You especially felt the one arm nearly wrap around your next, and his hot breath directly in your ear. “I apologise for all of that. For a moment, I didn’t trust my own judgement. But everything I believed before was right, there is a hope for you here.”

“So I passed?” Your question comes out shakier than you hoped.

“Yes.”

“What would have happened if I had failed?”

He gave you a condescending scoff, and you felt mocked for asking such a question. That was irrelevant to him. “Let’s not dwell on that. You are safe now, and no one will hurt you anymore.”

“Not even you?” You found some of your confidence again to force that question upon him, and you can tell when his smile breaks that it has forced him to think.

Something about all of this does not put your mind at ease. Maybe it’s the fact that you’ve never seen anyone fail the test, or maybe, you remind yourself, it’s because you are knee-deep in the clutches of a cult. Those thoughts are small compared to the main idea running through your head, though.

If I failed, I wouldn’t fit in his standards. I would have to die. He could have killed me. Could he kill me? I’ve never seen him kill anyone. Does he have that in him?

Harrow put a hand on your shoulder again. You now noticed that he seemed to do that a lot. “I will protect you myself. I know now that you’re absolutely worth it.” He had leaned in a little while he spoke, just to add a little more reassurance. You hope desperately that his protection is as valuable as his power. He certainly acted like it was.

You feel a finger brush up against your neck, and the sensation shakes you to your core. In that moment, he feels closer than he ever has before. There’s something so casual in his act, he either didn’t notice this move, or he pretended he didn’t. You already knew it was the latter.

“I hope that we’ve finally cleared up some confusion.” His gaze follows his hand, wandering around your neck until it locks back into your eyes. “Do you understand me?” The question, unlike his last few words, isn’t so kind. Once again, it’s a demand.

No.

“Somewhat.” You lied, knowing that he would not take the truth for an answer.

The way he looks at you suggests that he’s not entirely convinced, but for some unknown reason to you, it doesn’t bother him. “That’s progress. I want…” He pauses for a moment, and you immediately began to fear that a sincere moment was coming. ”something here. I want a deeper kind of relationship. Something that’s more than what we have right now.”

“More than strangers?”

You didn’t intend to be rude, but you didn’t regret your choice of wording. He was, in essence, a stranger that you saw a lot. No matter how much you talked, he was always so distant, as if he wasn’t really on this earth the same way you were. You were never going to be friends, but there was a space to be something else and he’d capitalised on it.

You could tell that he found your response to be harsher than he expected, but he didn’t seem too thrown off by it. You expected that he saw it coming, because he always just knew. The smile he gives almost seems to suggest that he found that funny, but you don’t know what a smile from him means anymore. “More than that, yes.”

In your amusement, you were able to smile yourself for the first time in a while. “I don’t know about that.”

Your own happiness seems to touch him, and continues with his warm words. “I asked you before to take a chance, and you took it. Right now, that’s paying off. All I’m asking you now is to do that again.” In the beats between sentences, you catch his head tilting a little. “You’ve been shutting me out. Please, allow me in.”

You don’t know what to say, feeling more lost for words than you had been before. You watched him, his smile this time not momentary, but waiting patiently. For some reason, you just could not say no. But you couldn’t say yes either, even if the small nod you ended up giving him proved otherwise.

I just can’t help myself, can I?

You don’t see it, but you feel his hand tapping you. “I’m proud of you. You’ve already grown so much.” There’s a great sense of elation on Harrow’s face. This was what he’d wanted, and you’d just given it to him.

You struggled to be proud of yourself. His seal of approval was never something you desired. What you had desired though, was help, and he’d provided that. He had yet to break his promises yet, so why would he start now?

A small part of your mind held on to a lingering thought that you couldn’t shake. You feared that perhaps the closer he gets, the more dangerous he becomes. You wanted someone to understand you, appreciate you, and care about you, but was this the right person?

If I keep things up like this, he won’t hurt me, though. It could all be alright. It’s all or nothing.

[kiawren]

💛💚💜 hi wren :3

💛/Yellow: Imagine a fantasy au with you and your f/o! What roles would the two of you take? How would the story end?

Well there's this au inspired by cupid and psyche I dumped in the tags of this post about wren being some cupid figure + fallen angel of sorts and kiawe's form is part fire and they fall in love even though circumstances rlly don't favour them to be together or something

A few times I've thought of a prince x knight au where wren is the prince and Kiawe is the knight becuz the latter is very hardworking Buuut I do not want to be royalty nor deserve to be or see myself in that role in an AU and I would rather dedicate myself to Kiawe as a knight does Buuuttt I also don't see myself as a knight becuz im lazy as hell and have no athletic stamina So.

Also an au where Kiawe is a vampire hehegheurgrjtjgkhh and wren woukd be like Haha you want to suck my blood So bad and kiawe's like no Actually i don't need to we have ethical reliable means of getting blood routinely.. But if he doesn't then well I am right Here

💚/Green: Does your f/o get jealous? How do they cope with it?

I think emotion wise he can be the type to feel jealousy but logic wise he's trusting of his partner and we communicate so he wouldn't find much reason to... Um to answer the question i think when kiawren is still pining then yeah, I think wren hangs out with Ilima becuz he helps wren with academia and research and the places to do fieldwork in alola cuz I think he's done research to write his own papers as well idk I forgor what's Ilima's academic qualifications that's what I have for now, then yeah kiawe gets jealous but when they're already dating then not really.. How he copes with it... Just seethes in secret or asks wren why he needs to spend time with Ilima so much (but trying to be subtle about it he will not say he's jealous or anything at all) but he will understand cuz wren has said it themself that he prefers spending time with Kiawe the most and everyday will still find time to do so, so honestly kiawe doesn't need to worry about wren avoiding him or spending less time with him or anything, if anything he shoukd be asking why the hell wren wants to meet him every single day

💜/Purple: What would your f/o do if you got into a argument? Would they eventually apologize?

Well they don't rlly get into arguments cuz they can communicate and wren is chill and would avoid conflicts. Though, they really do have parts of their characters that really do conflict. Like wren being too passive and slothful regarding their commitments while kiawe is actively working hard every day, maybe one day he might really try to sternly tell wren to get their stuff together if they really want to reach their ambitions instead of dreaming all day, but then again whatever kiawe says abour wren's flaws will be valid as hell becuz his criticisms are not petty but actually genuine so honestly wren woukd be like damn yah ok you make sense and they won't argue or anything.

Alsoooo... Okay yeah this one could be realistic too — kiawe gets reallty worried about not getting into his dream school to study dance abroad, and wren assures him by saying don't worry you've did what you can and just don't think about it if it's out of your control basically stuff that kinda brushes off the problem and encourages him to relax instead (becuz wren isn't confrontational about their own problems, this is true for me irl), and kiawe gets annoyed and says you always say that and you never do anything tangible to try and succeed and I'm actually worried and kinda scared about my future and want to take real steps to make me more assured but you're just saying words to make me feel better. Okay becuz this is what I always say to my sister and she's just kinda tired of me saying "it's past 9pm don't think about it" cuz that mindset doesn't work for everyone and for Kiawe I think he believes in the work he puts in helping him reach the outcome instead of just luck or pure optimism, so yeah wren probbaly says okay what do you want me to do, youve literally put in all the work you can and I see it and I think it's more than good enough and reallt reflects your genuine passion so what can I do if you dotn get accepted or if it's deemed not enough.

Um yeah for apologies.... Kiawe apologises first, I don't really apologise instead I just wsnt to move past the argument and pretend everything is fine and interact normally after... I just find it awkward to communicate it out even though inside I'm genuinely sorry and can objectively think it through in my head to see I'm wrong, but still Kiawe will apologise first becuz he cares about all his loved ones and won't let one-upping each other in arguments be worth the time we spend brooding in silence. And once Kiawe apologises wren will apologise too and everything will be okay and they try to talk things out 😁

[compacflt]

pre-publishing notes for slider (actually i meant to poast this yesterday i just forgor 💀), just to put them out there

as per usual i peddle an extreme amount of mis- and straight up disinformation about the aerospace & defense industries in this one. as a general rule of thumb if it sounds like i researched it poorly and/or made it up, that’s because i researched it poorly and/or made it up. like every scene i was like ‘that wouldn’t happen :D’ and wrote it anyway

this one-shot renders my third one-shot (about ice & hangman) entirely obsolete, as if the rooster one-shot didn’t already do that. so just ignore the hangman one. (i only wrote that one cause i felt bad about tagging my fics hangster when they’re barely in it.) Also, this one-shot kind of directly contradicts the end scene of “debriefing” in pretty much every way. i don’t really care, because this is a much stronger ending, but just throwing that out there—this one-shot doesn’t really jive with my other writing for plot/character arc reasons & im too lazy/sick and tired of my other writing to go back and retcon any of it

i only research things i am mandated to by school/a job/journalistic code of ethics, or that i think are interesting, or that i know will not depress me. divorce depresses me so i did not research divorce. Also im pretty sure marriage doesn’t work the way i described it “sign the papers & that’s it” but idgaf . shrug. im having fun

something i Didn’t make up, though: the thesis that iraq/afghanistan went so poorly in the long term partly because our armed services & especially that generation of commanding officers were prepared for total warfare with a near-peer (like the ussr) instead of counterinsurgency tactics against mountain-based guerrilla warfare-stratted forces (like Al-q*eda etc). that’s a very real thesis that ive read in multiple mil history books (“the generals,” ricks; “mil history for the modern strategist,” ohanlon) & co-opted because it’s kind of, in a fucked up way, a good metaphor for ice’s whole deal—he’d been expecting a traditional officer’s life with a woman etc (aka traditional warfare against the ussr, the us’ sworn enemy) and instead found happiness in the weirdest of places, another dude (aka guerrilla warfare) and no one taught him the right strategy for dealing with that; so, pigheadedly, like some US commands in the Middle East for a decade, he just dug in his heels & refused to budge/change his "total traditional war/heteronormative"-based strategy even if it obviously wasn’t working.

In a similar vein just so i can beat the allegations that im strategically dumb, the “strategies” against the ussr the boys are playing with in the usna section are intentionally the most dogshit strategies on earth. do not invade russia in a land war. especially not when nukes are on the table. the point is they’re ALL bad at strategy (strat as a metaphor for interpersonal communication).

i get the words “moderate” and “modulate” confused a lot. there’s a couple times in this one when I use moderate and mean modulate. Now it’s too late to edit it. by which i mean i am too lazy. editing anything on ao3 is a Sisyphean task. not worth it.

there's a lot to be said about my ice & maverick's respectability, which is to say, as slider points out, their life together is incredibly normie and boring and regular, except that they're two guys. like there's nothing super subversive going on here. "in the grand scheme of things is this really so bad?" is the question. politically this is a little funky. for metatextual character-arc reasons ice has to agree to an official marriage to prove that by the end he's not afraid to legally legitimize their relationship, but the heteroflexible/straight-passing/socially conservative ice & mav that I have written also probably aren't the kind of guys to acknowledge the struggle & strife & subversiveness of the queer community before them that fought for them to have that right. to quote from an essay by Lauren berlant & Michael Warner ("Sex in public"): "Respectable gays [ice & mav, distancing themselves from other gays] like to think that they owe nothing to the sexual subculture they think of as sleazy. But their success, their way of living, their political rights, and their very identities would never have been possible but for the existence of the public [visibly queer] sexual culture they now despise." just throwing that out there as something that is weighing on my mind having now finished writing this. I think that issue (ice & mav's relationship with/debt to the lgbt community) could be explored with a character like rooster, who might be much more a part of that struggle (especially pre-dadt-repeal)...but idk where or how I would write about it. just something to chew on. I keep finding different ways to politically interpret what I myself have already written which then keeps leading to more fucking one-shots. This slider one for instance was a reinterpretation from the 1980s Cold War politics lens of nuclear doomsday & how that affected a generation of men making shitty/suicidal decisions about their lives. an endless cycle for me. "just one more interpretation...i swear just one more..."

[mikadollie]

tatsumi ... (o´∀`o) i want him 2 be a (read; MY) father soooooo bad! he would b so good w children n he wants them 2 be good for him (≧▽≦) i loev papa (dilf) tatsu!!!! putting random emojis bc the ask isnt colorful as i wanted ..

btw hes on his 20s or 30s, OR MAYBE EVEN OLDER whatever u think its better :3

/// 🗯 trigger warnings & content warnings, this has mentions of ; non-con ( 99% of my asks r gonna have ncon btw) ,, (a bit of...??) plushophilia, big age gap, slight dacryphilia, (implied?) grooming (i guess??), somnophilia (kinda), emetophilia (i sneaked in vomit in my ask again :3 only a little bit), use of aphrodisiacs/drugs ???? I DONT KNWO HOW 2 TAG THIBGS I JUST SAY WHATEVER POPS UP IN MY MIND!!!!!!!!!

papa tatsu .. do u ever think abt when tatsumi said somrthing with Uhhhhh if alkaloid is a family ,, he wanted mayoi 2 take the role of a mother & wanted 2 be the father? :3 i dont remember well but !!! what if he rlly had a child ,, adopted or not ?? i think he would b such a great dad ( ´ ω ` ) well, he would seem a great dad at first, but im sure his child knows his true self ^_^ tatsumi tries to control himself, he really tries! what can he do at seeing such a easy prey? :( his child calls his name so happily that he cant help but feel guilt. he should be someone for his child to look up at, his urges just are stronger, okay? tatsumi, if hes still married with his wife (straight couple??? eww!!!), he would do his best to keep his child‘s little mouth shut (＠＾◡＾) hes just so kind to help his child to take a bath, isnt he? two fingers would b currently inside his child‘s mouth to muffle their cries and whines, while his other hand is fingering their hole/pussy, he swears hes gonna properly clean them up after with a warm bath. he doesnt wants to see his child crying anymore, even if it fuels his arousal, he just washes his child‘s hair & gently scratches their scalp as if nothing happened, he lets the water wash off his sins of his own child‘s body. tatsumi would b so good w manipulation i swear!! ヽ(>∀<☆)ノ tatsu would say 2 his child that papa would be upset if they said anything 2 their mama ,, of course his child would not want to upset him, right? he would grant all of his child‘s wishes, like he wants to grant his wishes with his child‘s body. papa tatsu would not b able to b too rough with his child or degrade them !!!! :3 he may be fast, but hes trying to soothe his child‘s cries and hiccups while their tight little hole/cunt clings around his cock (* ^ ω ^) depending on his child‘s age & sex assigned at birth, he would pop a boner so easily at seeing their body change. i mean!!!! im exaggerating a bit bc... tatsumi pls youre better than this BUT. put tatsumi & his child whose body is developing with shorts / short skirts in a room, one is getting out flooded with cum and it isnt tatsumi. he would focus on his pleasure and at the same time would focus on his child‘s well-being (´･ᴗ･ ` ) if theyre gagging and choking around his dick, its fine. they‘ll learn soon, its fine! theyre growing up and thats what grownups do, his child just need to be a little mature, tatsumi isnt doing anything wrong. if they throw up, it will be fine. he‘ll clean it, he just needs to cum again, alright?

ok adding more things here .. wgat if tatsumi‘s wife died & there is only his daughter n him left, so he sees his daughter as his wife?!?!?! i dont see rough sex & tatsumi being on the same sentencw but he would be gentle or a BEAST. going back 2 previous topic, papa tatsu would love everything related 2 u!! in any way!!!! did u see that guy who made a fursona costume (??i forgor the word) of all the plushies he came on? that would b tatsumi. talking abt single dad tatsu, it would b so boring w/o his child with him! eventually he would need something that makes him remember of his child 2 have any kind of pleasure, he cant cum if hes thinking abt another thing :( his child wouldnt mind if he stayed a bit at their room, right? after all, hes the owner of the house, he can do anything ^_^ his child wouldnt mind if he spent his time hugging one of their plushies, its not a big deal. papa tatsu just loooooooves anything related 2 their child! he would certainly jerk off on his child‘s bed n cum on their plushies, only a way 2 show his love ⸜(*ˊᗜˋ*)⸝ his child would b confused when they come back from school n see their papa washing their plushies.. it was perfectly clean! well, they arent going 2 deny any kind of affection (?). he would love to spoil his child with affection, just making them sit on his lap and spoonfeed them. those little moments r everything 2 tatsumi, specifically after he managed 2 put aphrodisiacs into the food (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ he can see the wet patch / small bulge on their clothes after, he thinks its sooo cute 2 see his child so needy like that. depending on his child‘s age (again. btw i use child but it can be five or less years old, more than ten, a pre teenager or teen etc!!!) ,, he knew he would have 2 talk abt this one day ,, and he probably was too much excited 2 have this kind of talk. he would explain to their child that its okay and that this is the progress of growing up + their body developing, its totally normal! he would b more than happy 2 introduce his child 2 lewd stuff, n im sure he has sex toys somewhere hidden in the house!! o(>ω<)o making his child use a small vibrator that was hidden (somewhere...) just 2 see how they react, even if their reaction is negative and they keep insisting its weird + that they dont like it, tatsumi would gently shush them & say that its 4 them own good, that they would do this eventually.

papa tatsu who would not b afraid 2 fuck his child multiple times!!! he just loves hearing their cries while he fucks them into their bed, the bed that once was a comfortable place to their child. he would even let his child hug a plushie while hes fucking them 2 comfort them, their face shoved on their plushie while they lay on their stomach. tatsumi would b so happy 2 see his child‘s belly getting a bit round of how much cum theres inside them \(^ヮ^)/ he would finger back anything that came out, his seed cannot be wasted!! or just seeing the outline of his cock on his child‘s stomach :3 papa tatsu has a lot of ideas!!! (also. what kind of drugs do u think tatsumi would give 2 his child? ^_^) he would not hesitate 2 drug his child just to see them in a lil state of daze & not try to resist their papa‘s intentions \(^ヮ^)/ if their mama is not dead or papa tatsu isnt a single dilf, papa tatsu would sneak out of his bedroom 2 go to his child‘s bedroom!! he would do anything 2 not wake up his child, and if he did, he would put a hand over their mouth to keep them quiet. he just wants his child to get a good night sleep while hes with his cock inside them ☆ ～('▽^人) cockwarming papa tatsu while youre asleep...

i have more things 2 say also!!!!! pleese share your thoughts abt papa tatsu :33

— 🍮 anon!!!!! (^_^) in this ask ,, i would talk abt shu being a weird creepy girl but .. i got other ideas!!!!!!!!

> pleese share your thoughts abt papa tatsu :33: Hnmmfghhg.............🤤

awaa papa tatsu and his child taking a bath... his cock inbetween their thighs and he's massaging along their waist....(*´꒳`*) he's just so sweet and nice even though his cock is splitting them in half and making them whine loudly!! I think he would also steal his childs clothes a lot to jerk off with..... sometimes he likes watching them hump their pillows when he peaks in at night before taking his child for himself... tatsumi shoving his fingers into their mouth to keep them quiet and saying to not wake mama up....

Tatsumi making his child put their panties back on/a plug in them to keep all that cum in and slowly have it drip out down their leg hehe... I wanna say he would give molly to his child but thats just me being biased. He would crush up some valiums (or oxys depends on the day) and slip it in the food to see his kid all wobbly and unable to resist anything he does!!!

[reilliane]

Hi yes the exams went well thnx for asking

Anyways

(pretend i didnt forget about the daydreams and had to sit there for almost a week to remember them again. Nope. Didnt happen)

So vigil!mc right? Younger brother kazuha right?

Right

That but when kazuha flew the country and reader was about to be captured a blue haired commissioner just so happened to find a contract between the former head of the kaedehara clan and his dad abt him and mc being bethrothed

But none of the clans never actually signed it and out of goodwill he copied both his dad and mc's dad signatures and when the shogunate went to take the reader he showed the papers to shogun and she put the mc under house arrest instead of killing her

So when lil bro kazuha comes back and sees ayaka/ayato/thoma instead of big sis waiting for him, hes like: don't tell me you have bad news

And then theyr like: yes and no

And bring him back to kamisato estate(where reader is under house arrest) and mc explains everything to him.

to put ayaka into the mix aswell: now from outside ayaka and kazuha situation will look like: oh yeah we are getting along as in law's(?)

But from the inside its more like

Kazu: im thankful and all but get ur brother away from my onee-chan

Ayaka: my brother likes ur sis let them get tgtr

And you can think abt the rest yourself

(i also want to like put the irodori festival in here as well but i forgor what i planned for that ehe)

Please hydrate, eat enough, sleep enough and take care of yourself may luck and happiness be by your side

Ask n.8

👑anon

AHHH

I remember when I got a similar ask about Ayato's contract marriage, but that was a long, long time ago... lost in the m-vigil tags pahah!

Arranged marriage aus are my jam I lovelovelove it so I'm nyomming this thing up for breakfast.. and I'm writing this at like 4 in the morning.

We've all unanimously established that Ayaka likes to play matchmaker I'm living for it- to be fair, she looks up to Vigil!MC so much, she's her inspiration! You can't fault her for wanting MC to be a part of the family!

(Kazuha in utter distress at the background)

Kazu will be very grateful that nee-chan was saved, but ⚆_⚆ pls, don't make her change her Kaedehara name (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) He would be really alone, then!

[skrunksthatwunk]

OK finished ylad chapter 12 here's some spoiler ass thoughts

so basically a couple weeks ago I went into the saejima/majima fight underleveled, got my ass beat, ground out like 15 levels, and today I returned and SWEPT that shit. wonderful time i was super happy to see the tag team saemaji super spin or whatever they called it :)

majima's body language is super weird in this game he's just shrugging Like That all the time and instead of manspreading he gave us this gay little crossed leg thing which is cool and hey majima what did you mean by this

????????? babygirl WHAT 😳😳😳

anyway

no but shortly after when they're like prepping to fight alongside majima, saejima, arakawa, and tendo and the disbandment meeting ichiban's like >:D omg!! I'm fighting with the legends!!! and nanba was like "now is NOT the time to get a hard on" sorry i forgor to screenshot that one. like cut it out guys!! why is this chapter so SUS it's almost like gay people

SPEAKING OF WHICH THE KIRYU REVEAL WAS SO. OH MY GOD YO

like i knew he was in this game but if i didn't that wouldve made me lose my shit. i kinda lost my shit anyway. i missed him 🥺 and daigo's jaw being on the floor oh my god poor thing can you imagine. that's his PAPA oh my godd

meanwhile majima and saejima were BOTH like "lol finally. was wonderin when ya'd show back up again" ???? so he's still bad at going into hiding and/or everyone thinks he's too strong to kick it. love him dearly my sweet dense boy

too bad that fight was so easy though bc like,, ichiban hyped it up as being crazy tough like he can't move anymore and he called it legendary like babe it took me like. 5 moves max. calm down. they couldve at least used the classic rgg trick or just putting more guys in there to make it "tougher" (read: longer) if they really wanted that impression. idk but it was silly so who cares

aaaaand then arakawa dies which i also accidentally spoiled for myself oops poor ichiban oh noo :((

he's fucking WILTING somebody help him :((

anyway it's cool cuz he still loves his friends and whatever. I'm having a blast this game is good <3