august
Theodore Nott x fem!reader
summary: Theo asks you to be his fake-girlfriend but you understand the assignment a little too well. No Voldemort/war AU
warnings: !not proofread! underage alcohol consumption
word count: 4k
ao3 - Theo masterlist
You weren’t mine to lose
Theodore Nott knew that one day he would be asked to marry a pureblooded witch and have a family with her; not because he wanted it, but because that’s what is expected of him.
What he didn't know is that in his 7th year, his father would begin throwing women at him, witches he didn't know and didn't care to get to know.
He did his best to avoid his fathers constant complains and lectures, but time was not his friend and he needed to come up with a solution to his problem or he would soon be marrying a stranger.
You and Theo became somewhat friends during quidditch practice. Neither of you played quidditch but attended your friends practice meetings, since you had nowhere else to go.
You bonded over not being into sports and falling asleep during first period every Monday. You always knew you would find him near corners at parties, watching the crowd but never intending to join them.
You were a pureblooded witch, not part of the Sacred 28, definitely not a blood purist. He liked those things about you, it felt refreshing being friends with someone who did not care about such insignificant things.
You were also kind and thoughtful and always helped him when life felt heavy, that is why he was brave enough to ask you a very important favor.
"Absolutely not!", you shouted
"Shhhhh", students whispered.
Madam Pince walked to you, with a scowl on her face and her hands crossed tightly in front of her,
"Mr Nott, are you and your friend aware this is a library?", she said displeased.
"I am sorry, Madam Pince, it won’t happen again", you whispered fast
"Well that is what I expect of you, next time I hear you, you'll be jinxed off of here.", she replied and walked away.
Theo was looking at you innocently, begging you with his eyes to accept his proposal.
"Theo I will not pretend to date you", you whispered this time.
"Please, it won't be for more than three months, I just need my father to back off!", he explained
"Please, please, please!", he continued, "He will marry me off to a snob French witch, I am sure of it, and then I’ll be forced to have a bunch of kids with her, for the sake of the family line"
"I will end up 30 and more miserable than Snape!", he finished dramatically
You rolled your eyes at that and said, "Firstly, that is a bit dramatic and secondly, if we 'date' there is no way it will be only for three months."
He smirked at that "Well, love, if you wanted to be with me for more than that you could have said so from the start."
You hit him with your notebooks after that and he burst out laughing.
You saw Madam Pince behind him -not so entertained- mouthing "OUT" with her eyebrows raised.
He shouted your name while following you down the hallway,
"Please, think about it.", he begged
"Theo I told you-", you started but were cut off by a figure walking past you.
"Hello there.", says Finn with a smile that could persuade you to do anything he wanted.
Truth is you have had a crush on the boy ever since you met him. He is in a different House than you and you never get the chance to talk to him. You always try to master up the courage during parties but you can never find the right time. He hangs out with your friends but you feel too foolish to admit your crush to them, so you are stuck with greetings in hallways and daydreaming during class.
"Hi", you respond with a blush on your face and an awkward smile.
Finn continues walking; but your mind is stuck on the way he looked at you and his smile and;
"So that is why you won't be my fake-girlfriend."
"I- what?", you turn to find him smirking like an idiot and reply "Shut up", as you walk by him, taking long strides.
"Wait wait.", he says while trying to catch up to you.
"Maybe this can help us both.", he says after running in front of you to stop you.
"How could this help me?", you say back, "Not that I want any help!", you add quickly
"Well in the case that you did want my help, I can - as a teenage boy- testify that jealousy goes a long way."
"Please, jealous? He doesn't even know my name, why would he care if we dated?"
"Along with jealousy, being seen with someone else makes you more attractive", he adds quickly
"That is stupid and disgusting."
"It is the way the world works, love." he smiles deviously "So what do you say will you be my fake girlfriend?" he says as he extends his hand into a handshake
"No" you reply, smacking his hand away.
"I will see you tomorrow for breakfast, I'd tell you to ask Pince, she's a proper catch and your dad would approve, but I’m not sure she'll say yes after what happened today.", you say sarcastically
"Oh you wound me so.", he sighs dramatically "Maybe I'll ask McGonagall with a flock of birds to impress her."
You laugh at that before wishing eachother goodnight.
You lie on your bed thinking about Theo and his proposal; about Finn and how stupid your crush feels. About how stupid boys make you feel, how you wish you had more experience with them, more confidence.
You wished you were one of those people who went out to get what they wanted, the ones who fought for themselves, didn’t sit around in the corners with a comfort blanket draped around their shoulders.
“Maybe this can help us both” he said
Would it honestly be that bad to pretend to be Theos girlfriends for a few months?
You trusted him and knew he would never do anything to make you feel uncomfortable. Maybe you would have to set a couple of rules to be sure there would be no misunderstandings, but things could work out.
You quickly got dressed the next day and found him eating breakfast alone; like he did every morning, being the first of his friends to wake up this early.
You sat across from him and begun putting fruit and pastries on your plate while he filled your coffee cup; another habit of his.
“I will do it”, you said calmly
His eyes shot up at yours and before he could say anything you let out a hiss of pain and stared at the coffee spilling from the overflowing cup to your hands and plate.
“But-“ you continued more serious now “we need to set up a few rules.”
“I love rules” he replied while drying your hands with a napkin and then switching your plates so he got the drenched-in-coffee one.
"Okay well, firstly I would appreciate it if this arrangement stayed between the two of us- I am not exactly thrilled to be mocked by the whole Slytherin house for the rest of the school year.", you said looking him in the eye
“Easy- done”, he exclaimed “You have to come with me to a Ball and meet my father.”
“I- you should know it will be very awkward”, you said apologetically
“No need to worry, it will take no more than ten minutes, he isn’t a people person, I just need him to believe that I am dating you.”, he explained quickly.
"Fine, I guess, but after we end this won’t he keep on pressuring you? We can’t keep this on forever you know.", you said
"Well, of course not; I just need him to get off my back until we graduate, then I can be free of him."
"Okay then, do we need to pretend at school? Your father won’t be here to see us.", you asked
"Yes, but the children of his friends will be and then he’ll find out Slytherins are terrible gossipers, you know.", he joked
"Fine okay, but we won’t do anything extreme", you said with a serious tone
"Not unless you ask me", he said grinning like the devil (wink wink)
You throw him a blueberry and he laughs before he picks it up and eats it
"What about you and loverboy? How do you want us to approach it?", he asked
Us rolls off his tongue way too easily, you think and feel a flutter in your stomach as you play it back
"Well , I haven’t thought about that, I am not sure I want to do anything really, I just want to forget it even happened.", you awkwardly say
"What 'happened', your feelings? It isn’t exactly something you can control .", he joked
"Don’t be ridiculous. Of course it is; if you are reasonable and smart." you say looking him in the eyes "Anyways, I got too distracted from the constant what if but now I have something else to focus on." you continue
"I can assure you I'll be the best fake girlfriend there is" , you say and smile
"It is a deal then.", he says extending his hand
"Yes.", you say shaking his hand this time.
The pretending started slowly, small touches in front of other students in the library, the Great Hall and on quidditch matches.
Spending weekends at Hogsmeade together, sharing butterbeer and going for walks with his arm behind your back or hands clasped together.
He would lend you his sweater and you would lend him your scarf, the one with your house colors.
He pretended he smelled you in his Amortentia and made a spectacle out of it in class; leaving you a blushing mess.
Eventually the Ministry planned a Ball; and you dreaded every second leading to it.
Theo helped you pick out a gown for it and walked you through the experience of a "Ministry party for the Miserable", as he called them
"Most of them will be boring themselves with talks about work; others will be drinking their boredom away and then there will be dancing. It will be over before you realize it, truly", he calmed you down
You agreed to meet him at the venue and you found him by the door playing with his wand while waiting for you.
"Some boyfriend you are-", you joked and his head immediately shot up to look at you "Making me come here alone, not walking me from the car, what will everyone say?", you said smiling and looped your arms around his, while he stared at you.
"My fair lady you have to forgive me, I will make it up to you." he shook his head and lead you both inside.
He spotted his father quickly and walked towards him. You felt terrified, couldn't exactly understand how a man sweet and kind; alive like Theo could have come from a man like his father.
He looked cold and mean and from what Theo had told you about him he was.
"Father" Theo said in a voice reserved just for his father and introduced you to him.
"I am sure you are familiar with her parents; they have an active role in the Wizarding community.", he said
You smiled at that; at his Slytheirn traits showing up when he needed them most.
"Ah yes, I remember your father in our Charity event a few months back.", he said with his strict voice, "I just wish Theodore would have bothered to tell me back then you two knew eachother."
You smile awkwardly and look at Theo who gives you a tired look.
"As I understand you are seeing eachother; how long has that been going on?", he asks
"A few months; but we have been friends for a few years now", you reply as calm as you can
"And what are your plans for after you graduate? Theo is going to work in the Ministry, I have friends in departments that can show him the ropes", he questions and you try to picture Theo in a Ministry 9-5 job and think it is just wrong.
"Well I am not sure yet; I was hoping to continue my studies and maybe get a master in Potions or Transfiguration. Passing NEWTs is the only thing on my mind right now.", you explain nervously
"Right. Well excuse me, I have to greet a few friends.", he says and leaves the two of you alone, once again.
You both leave out a breath you have been holding for a while.
"Didn't go that bad, right?", you ask
"No, uh it went fine.", he says with a troubled look, "Do you mind if we go outside?"
"Not at all, come on.", you say with a comforting voice and let him lead you outside.
You find a quiet place in the garden away from everyone. Finding company in the stars and each other.
"I hate him", Theo breathes and you don't know what to say back, how to comfort him.
So you take his hand in yours and hold it tightly.
"I am not taking the job at the Ministry, I won't.", he said
"What do you want to do?", you encourage him
He shakes his head before he answers.
"Slughorn offered to write me a recommendation letter, so I can study where he did. If I do well on the exams",
"But my father doesn't care about what I want, has not even bothered to find out.", he scoffs
"Well he can sod right off, respectfully, because he scares me." you say and he laughs
"You'll do great, you are so smart Theo, everything will work out, I am sure of it.", you say holding his hand
"Thank you.", he says smiling, "for everything."
You spend the rest of the night talking about life and the future, with your head on his shoulder and his thumb drawing circles in your hand.
As the school year progressed stress and anxiety were starting to get the best of everyone. Students were either practicing for a quidditch match or studying in the library.
That is why a few Gryffindors decided to host a party, to take a break from studying and celebrate the success that would surely be coming; "very Gryffindor of them" commented Theo.
While getting ready for the party you realized this would be the last time everyone would be having fun together and you felt nostalgia crash on you like the waves that destroy rocks.
What happens after school? You think.
Will you lose your friends? Will you lose Theo? Where will you go? What will you do?
There are questions you don’t know how to answer and that scares you.
Then your mind drifts to Finn and how you never did anything to get close to him no matter how much you liked him; liked because now he is a thing of the past, thanks to Theo you think, who took your mind off of him, kept you company.
Maybe, you think, faking a relationship with Theo made something deep inside you think that it wasn’t pretend. That Theo liked you more than a friend and that maybe you did too.
Did or do?, you think
Did, definitely did. Theo will get a masters in Potions somewhere and you will have to find your place in this world. Liking Theo isn’t something that should be happening right now- or ever with his terrifying dictator of a dad.
You laugh as you picture family holidays with the Notts.
“Knock knock”
You snap out of your thoughts and turn to find Theo leaning on your door, with his hands in his pockets .
“Ready?” He asks
You nod and he extends his hand “After you my lady”
“Shut up” you laugh as you let him hold you
Ronald Weasley waits for you by the portrait of the Fat Lady and lets you inside.
Everyone is dancing, snogging, drinking or doing all of those things together.
"I am going to get us drinks." shouts Theo and you give him a thumbs up as you walk into the crowd, trying to find some familiar face.
Suddenly you feel a hand on your shoulder and see Finn smiling at you.
"Hi!" you beam at him
"Finally decided to let yourself have fun?", he asks playfully
"What do you mean?", you ask
"Well I haven't seen you in a party since you and Nott became a thing, come to think of it, before that you two would always find a quiet corner and stay there together.", he says
Before you get the chance to reply you feel an arm snake around your waist and Theos scent fills your lungs.
"Here you go, love" he says and hands you your drink "Finn, how are you mate?"
"I am fine Nott, preparing for Quidditch finals, nervous about the NEWTs?"
"Obviously, but what can I do besides studying?", he responds.
Awkward silence lays between the three of you. You cant wait to laugh with Theo about it, once Finn leaves.
"You are lucky your girlfriend is such a good listener. I remember once she let me explain the Star Wars films to her without falling asleep or complaining.", he said laughing
"How do you even remember that, it was ages ago", you say surprised
"You would be surprised. Now if you will excuse me, I need a refill."
You watched Finn leave and turned to see Theo looking at you with a calculating look.
"Looks like loverboy is back", he said
"Stop" you say and drag him with you to greet your friends and dance.
After a few hours you both decided you had enough social interactions for one night, so you decided to go back to your dorms.
As you were leaving you spotted Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley, laughing and kissing eachother before disappearing into a broom closet together.
“Ah broom closets; the perfect shagging spot”, joked Theo
“What, you..” you stammer “in a…”
“Shagged in a closet? Yes”, he said smirking at your awkwardness
“Right” you replied
“What, you haven’t?" he asks and you shake your head
“Not even for a dare?”, he continued
“No, Theo I haven’t.” you say annoyed
He laughs and says “Don’t worry you aren’t missing much. Besides, the best shagging spot is the restricted section.”
“You are impossible.” , you say to him as you walk together side by side
“I am joking, nothing tops the comforts of a bed.”, he says jokingly
You remain quiet, I wouldn’t know, you think to yourself.
“Wait” he says “-have you ever?”
“Have I what?” You say annoyed
“Been with someone” he asks
“I, well, have you seen me date anyone, all these years we have been friends?”
“No, but you also never told me you like Finn, so how would I know what else you keep to yourself. "
“Liked, Theo, and can we please forget about that?”, you plead
“Alright I am sorry” he answers raising his hands
“Do you think it is weird I haven’t been with anyone? Yet?” You ask nervously
“Weird? No of course not, why?”
“Well you sounded very surprised, that is all”, you say
“No it isn’t weird, but if you want me to show you what it is like I-”, he said slowly
You hit his arm and cut him off “Shut up, honestly, you can sometimes be so annoying!”
He laughed and said “Sorry”
You continue walking without saying anything before he breaks the silence.
“I think he likes you”
“Nonsense, he talks to everyone”, you say while rolling your eyes
“Well then, he is an idiot”, he responds with a serious tone
You shake your head and laugh
“He really is”, he says again
And as you look up at him you see his eyes deeply focused on yours. The look on his face: something entirely new to you. Up until now you always thought Theodore Nott had shown you his real self, almost every part of him; but the way he looks at you now proves how wrong you have been.
His cheeks are flushed and you are sure if you were to touch him he’d burn you. His usual smirk is nowhere to be found; his lips are relaxed and asking for something; as if they have a mind of their own. His eyes are wandering over your features, not calculating but admiring.
His hand flies up to fix a strand of hair that has fallen in front of your face and gently places it behind your ear.
You look at his lips and at him, lost and surprised.
See you tomorrow, he whispers and before you get the chance to respond he walks away to his dorm.
What happened? you think for the rest of the night
Had you grown closer to Theo these past few months, without meaning to?
Had your feelings shifted and if yes when did that happen?
You felt empty as you woke up the next day. Did you feel for Theo what you had felt for Finn once? A made up scenario showing you what could have been?
No, you knew Theo, the version of him inside your head was the one that already existed.
He is kind and smart; he cares about you, always have; even before this agreement.
He always makes sure you feel safe, never pushes things too far.
What he said last night, the way he looked at you sends butterflies to your stomach. Would it be that ridiculous of you to think he has feelings for you?
And if he does have feelings for you, how do you feel about him?
Is he a friend or something more?
Have you just grown used to the attention he gives you? The pretending and faking.
Or do you want-need it to be real.
You will ruin everything and that scares you.
This is too much thinking before coffee, you think and head to the Great Hall.
You find him then with a mug in one hand and a book in the other, once he sees you he smiles, innocently, not a smirk; a greeting.
And that is enough for you to break down your walls, leave your fears behind.
You want him to smile at you; only you every time he sees you. You want to be with him, not only in front of others, always.
You want to tell him I love you and you also want to hear it from him. You want him to tell you his dreams and encourage yours. You want to spend every night with him and wake up in his arms. You want him to show you what it is like to be cared for, truly.
And that desire is enough for you to shed your fears away, because even if things go bad, at least you've tried; fighted.
"Goodmorning", he says as you take the seat next to him.
You smile at him "Goodmorning"
He fills your mug with coffee like he always does
"I don't want to keep pretending to be your girlfriend.", you say
His face darkens and his smile disappears, "Is it about last night? Did I make you feel uncomfortable, I-"
"I can't keep pretending.", you continue "If you want to be with me we have to stop pretending, I want to be with you for real."
"I-" he is speechless now, playing what you said over and over in his head.
"I am in love with you. And it is okay if you aren't, but I had to tell you. I can't fake it anymore.", you confess
He smiles now and grabs your face to kiss you before whispering in your lips, "Who said I was pretending?"
fin
dividers by the wonderful @saradika
not proofread, sorry for mistakes
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