#fried_trout fics

[deepfriedtrout]

It slips away from her hands. Vertin dives after it; her heart, always calm and collected, starting to ramp up in pace. She catches the band before it hits the grass, and she lands on a knee, cradling the item with a gentleness like it was something precious and deeply cherished. Because, because it was. But why? Did the Foundation not care to collect what was left of her friends? Vertin looks out into the fields. She stands, upwards, slipping the rusted bangle into her wrist. With a certain desperation— of a girl chasing after the ashes of the dead— she stumbles into the grass, hands parting the collected blades, eyes darting over— here, there, left, right, up, down, she combs through every square inch of the field.

i got the idea of ‘hey. what if the foundation were even more assholes and didnt recover the remains of the other kids in the breakout incident’ to fuck up vertin more

[canonical-transformation]

what are some of the authors you like in regards to genshin fic?

This is a surprisingly tough question! Partly bc my tastes change day to day and some authors I love like 20% of their work and the rest isn't my jam. Partly because bc I remember fics better than I remember authors.

I'm cheating and using my bookmarks list a bit but lemme see. There's a mix of mostly-romance and mostly-genfic authors here. Check the linked fics for content warnings. In no real order:

alcyonenight's Honorary Knight series is 300K words of whump, poor mental health and poorer coping habits, and very very beautiful if you're into broken people trying their best to be there for one another.

birdzilla (@dandelion-wings ) does amazing genfic (Favonius Training, A Better Meal) and romance-thriller (A Convenient Facade, An Open Hand) with the Mondstadt adults. (I swear, they're like the resident expert on the Knights)

Danya324 does well-crafted Xiangling/Xiao (Gathered in a Bowl of Peace).

darkcosmo does a lot of femslash (best laid plans), most of which is smut and I won't directly link.

GlassDrachma lately writes a lot of Chili, often hilarious (the consultant's kidnapping, the sister), though I first found them through some amazing Ganyu and Hu Tao character pieces. Their doofus!Zhongli and oblivious!Keqing are consistently hilarious.

granola_peel does a lot of XiangTao (Shooing the Goose) and writes both of them well (Xiangling, Beloved, Hu Tao Doesn't Cry). Some great smut under their pseuds.

melorsomething (@melorsomething) has one of my favourite Chilumi character studies (discrepancy) and Ningguang character studies (To Rise, To Fall).

pyresque writes amazing femslash in a wiiiide range of f/f pairings (i talk and talk about love, but it's above the clouds, i've changed so that i can meet the new you, if i put kindness onto your shoulders)

Schistosity (@fizzityuck) I followed over from their excellent FE3H work, and they have some amazing character studies (friends of friends, partial ocean view)

sclaris's standout for me is a dark!Jean fic (under the threat of your blood on my hands), but you may also like their lighter toned femslash (her life, a mimicry, a letter from the wind)

seasparks has amazing earnest femslash (what I want, I want, begin again), and also can be hilariously funny (Vengeance will be... ours?, Scents and sensibility)

Spiderlily_writes does smut that I invariably find delightful and funny (and FE3H too!)

No offence intended to any mutuals I forgot to mention! Nor the 20 femslash authors I'm subscribed to who I ran out of energy to list all of in detail >_> , like arsonide, atheneglaukopis, cadriona_m (@cadriona), chuminder, Fried_Trout (@deepfriedtrout), oh gods I'm barely a third way into the alphabet, SORRY VARIOUS AMAZING PEOPLE aahhh maybe I'll add more later

[deepfriedtrout]

the inherent comedy of an immovable object (woman with the tendency to not keep a decent work-life balance for the life of her) meeting an unstoppable force (doctor who is concerned by her wellbeing and blood caffeine levels). immovable object only moves because her teenaged subordinate can and will definitely take after her habits.

Posting this for luck in my jiu pulls. I dunno how the foundation women correlate to getting her but lets just cross our fingers and pray to rnjesus this is a worthy enough offering.

[deepfriedtrout]

Ahab’s wicked, frankly deranged smile falls off her face. It shouldn’t be possible for anything like this to happen, but even the winds silence its loud whistling, the storm slightly quieting down its deafening rumbling. Some of the sinners take note, Outis can feel Faust’s stare on her back, intrigued. Even Ishmael has started to notice, despite her tunnel-visioned, trauma-and-vengeance-fueled rage. Outis can feel herself become singled out with the searching stare from above, and she, with nowhere to look but up, does exactly that, meeting eye-to-eye with Ahab. The old captain’s mouth hangs open. Then morphs a name that can’t be heard through the waves, but Outis knows, knows in her head what she says. “Odysseus?”

In the words of one person who commented here, I think this fic can be summarized by:

Penelope is a woman in Limbus: good Ahab is a woman in Limbus: great Penelope and Ahab are the same woman in Limbus: divinely inspired

[deepfriedtrout]

Homeward bound you will travel, through inferno and back. You'll survive through all of this (you have to), even if you die a thousand times trying to reach home.

Outis drinks tea, reads newspaper like an old man, and thinks about her family.

[deepfriedtrout]

Eule steps out of the kitchen, looking nonchalant with a smear of flour on her face.

"Say," Eule moves towards her, voice sing-songy. What's gotten her into a good mood? Elster wonders. "Why don't you buy a coffee for that lady outside?"

"What?" Elster turns to look back at her, and the woman is looking up at her with a knowing grin.

She points to the woman in the white sundress outside, sitting on one of the chairs and utterly absorbed in a book that she's reading. "Her! You've been making eyes at her ever since you entered. You're not very subtle, Elster."

The signalis brainrot is brutal. help me

[deepfriedtrout]

Whatever this woman's internal turmoil and tragedies were, they were not going to help Outis achieve anything. Best leave this situation quickly as possible. The rain was getting stronger, and she was now becoming soaked to the bone. She looks back to the redhead. She's glaring at her. Outis sighed, running a hand through her already rain-drenched hair. "You do whatever you want. This was a one-time thing."

I've been in a writing block for a while, and the pmoon shitshow managed to send me even deeper into it, but I did manage to whammy this out while listening to the title song. Such and such.

[deepfriedtrout]

Wherein instead of Arataki Itto joining Kuki Shinobu to Liyue, Sara is the one to join the Arataki Gang's deputy there for diplomatic reasons. They end up stuck in the Chasm underground with the same old Chasm Crew, and faced with the door that shows everyone their biggest fears, Kujou Sara thinks she has truly gone to hell for her crimes.

Arataki Itto is dressed up as Sangonomiya Kokomi. How will this go?

Two fics in two days? More likely than you think.

The main idea is from this godforsaken post: https://www.tumblr.com/fishareglorious/703257225875046400/i-found-the-babygirl-its-as-shrimple-as-that?source=share

[deepfriedtrout]

Ah, she was getting too sentimental over the orphans again.

"Not exactly. Tartaglia's visit this Children's Day has endeared most of them to him, leaving you in the dust." Arlecchino says, shaking her head in false sympathy to turn away from Columbina. But secretly, she cracks a grin. She's never been fond of the Tsaritsa's Vanguard, all too reckless and fixated on the grandeur of his bloodlust. What's better than pitting the Third against the runt of the litter?

She thumbs the golden engraving on her teacup.

Cunt, it said.

Arlecchino is one petty cunt, that she is honest about.

Or, Columbina and Arlecchino have some tea. Nothing goes wrong this time. (In other words, no one dies or gets brutally mauled.)

[deepfriedtrout]

Chapter 4 of Rex Lapis best wingman.

Yaoyao’s release is the catalyst of me writing this lmao. This is Keqing’s overthinker era.

[deepfriedtrout]

But misfortune strikes for the fourth time.

The Rusty Koi thrashes off the Traveler's line, its lithe blue and silver body pulling away, fumbling and diving back into the depths of the broken-down bridge. Unlike the previous times, it doesn't resurface back up again. The Traveler stares at the water, their golden eyes starting to dim as if they've lost all hope in this world.

Then, the Traveler unhinges their jaw, and a bloodcurdling wail rattles through the corners of Yaoguang Shoal and the northeast side of Guili Plains. Flocks of cranes and all other birds take off to the skies, and the napping hilichurl tribes around the vicinity are all rudely woken up from their sleep.

"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!" The Traveler screams into the sky, their eyes losing all light in them.

I’ve always wanted to write a fishing fic. I still have so much shit to do what am I doing with this oh no oh no

[deepfriedtrout]

It’s out. It’s finally out.

Posted by u/LiyueMillennialOfficial • 1 day ago

AITA for setting my coworkers up on a vacation that ended in disaster?

I (33F) set up my coworkers K (26F) and G (3000+F) on a date disguised as a paid vacation so they can stop pining over each other at work and finally get together.

I personally paid for an all-expense vacation at the Dragonspine Inn for a full week, and paid staff there to subtly push them closer to each other. Such examples are: putting them in the same room with one bed, decorating their food with hearts, and putting them in situations one would find in a sappy cliche romance novel.

[deepfriedtrout]

The two of them make eye contact once Keqing’s cursing dies down. Ganyu is still utterly confused, she can see something… beige? poking behind Keqing’s legs. Keqing seems to look embarrassed and sheepish when she looks up and catches Ganyu’s eye.

Keqing takes in a deep sigh. “Alright. I only ask, please don’t laugh. Or tell anyone.”

Ganyu opens her mouth to say something, but she closes it shut.

Keqing looks back down to whatever it is that was below her. Then in a single pull, she brings a small, brown mass to her lap. Amber eyes stare at Ganyu, and Keqing looks away.

It’s a cat.

Rex Lapis help her.

~~~~

Ganqing and a cat. What more can I say?

[deepfriedtrout]

"My Knave," Columbina hums, a soft coo of a songbird amidst the noise of battle.

Arlecchino sidesteps to let one of the Vanguards strike a mob of mitachurls charging towards them with shields.

"Yes, Little Dove?" She does not caution herself in saying it in the presence of her men. The soldiers raised in the House of the Hearth will keep their mouths shut at the little nickname. They are deeply loyal to her, and by extension to her lover, the woman who has sung them lullabies to sleep as children.

Columbina offers her a smile, unbelievably soft for a woman who's raining cold hell upon their foes. "I'm glad that you're still here."

my Harbinger!Timmie post gave me enough strength to finish and post this. Go figure.

[deepfriedtrout]

What the hell is up people I wrote this the entire day. If you want to see Zhongli trying to wingman Ganqing together I guess you can read this.

I hope I can finish this.

[deepfriedtrout]

Ayoooo I’ve finished writing chap 3 of Rex Lapis best wingman. Zhongli presents evidence that yes, Ganyu likes Keqing off-screen.

I had to feed the Marites!Cloud Retainer headcanon. Zhongli too I guess.