#gIMME A FUCKING HERMANN

[kaijuobsessed-blog]

i won’t be super active on this blog like i am with my ardyn one. not until the movie comes out?

[k-sci-janitor]

Holy shit sorry this is so fucking long, but my Mer-may contribution!

[Image description: Hermann, in a parka holding his phone on an ocean pier is looking about confusingly: Strange, he said to meet him here...where the blazes is he? It's been 20 minutes...

Hermann turns at the sounds of a voice going: Uh, hey! HERMANN!!

Voice, coming up from under the pier: Do you mind, uh, coming under the dock?

Hermann, walking beneath the pier, looking agitated: NEWTON! What is the meaning of this?

Hermann stops and looks surprised: Really, I - OH.

Merman Newt lies on the beach waving at Hermann: Uh, hey!

Hermann, looking distressed: I've gone mad. I knew this was too good to be true...

Mer-Newt, pointing at himself: DUDE, STFU, you haven't! This is real!!!

Hermann: But how? We've chatted online for a year!??

Mer-Newt: I might have stolen a phone left on the beach...actually like, a LOT of phones...

Mer-Newt, pleading: Let me just explain myself, please Hermann?

Hermann, resigned: You have 20 minutes.

2 hours later...

Hermann, sitting down: They give out DEGREES down there?? Fascinating...

Mer-Newt, in the water but head above the water: Hey, don't sound so surprised!!

Hermann, smiling: Well, I should probably get going. It's getting late. It was-enlightening to meet you, Newton.

Mer-Newt, looking sad: W-will you text me later? I hope this wasn't too much to take in...

Hermann, blushing: Well, I was shocked but, I don't think I could stop talking to you even if I tried. You DO need to stop stealing phones though.

Mer-Newt, arms waving: Hermann, I can't just go to the LIBRARY-

The Next Day-

Hermann, ankle deep in the water, hands a bag to Mer-Newt: So I got you my old tablet, a water resistant cover, a tupperware container, MUST you travel with it, a solar battery pack-

Mer-Newt: OMG GIMME-

THE END! End ID.]

[type1diabetesinfandom]

Femslash in Diabetes Fic List

T1D in Star Wars  | T1D in Marvel | T1D in Supernatural | T1D in My Hero Academia

All right, people; this isn’t a fandom rec list like my others so far, this is instead a rec list by topic. Specifically femslash. I’ve found only eight t1d fics with femslash front and center so far, but there’s a pretty good variety among them, and I’m sure there will be more to add in the future.

(The gif is misleading btw, I couldn’t find any Korrasami fics with t1d. Lmk if anyone writes some, because I want it. but that gif is gorgeous and i could not resist)

The fics are posted in alphabetical order. All links lead to AO3, unless otherwise specified.

If you like the fics, please remember to kudos and comment to let the author know you liked it. That’s the best way to support these fics and see more of them in the future. :)

blood sugar by sailorvtm

Fandom: The Last of Us (Video Games)

Rating: Gen

Warning: None Chosen

Relationship: Dina/Ellie

Wordcount: 523, complete

Summary:

hi! sailor here, basically the summary is that ellie has type one diabetes and experiences hypoglycemia (aka low blood sugar / low glucose ). This fic also includes general type one diabetes rep since I see nothing with this shit. Before some people are like “why are you writing this?” Why not! Plus I have type one diabetes and all the fics ive seen so far are all literal stereotypes and im tired of seeing it

Gimme Some Sugar by lologoblens

Fandom: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018) 

Rating: Explicit

Warning: None Apply

Relationship: Adora/Catra

Wordcount: 9,311, complete

Summary:

When Catra takes Adora home after meeting her at the club she expects to be in for a good night. What she does not expect is to wake up in the middle of the night to a near stranger rooting through her refrigerator...loudly.

Just My Thing by GleekOut91

Fandom: Glee

Hosted On: Fanfiction.net

Rating: Teen and Up

Warning: None Apply

Relationship: Rachel Berry/Quinn Fabray

Wordcount: 5k+, incomplete

Summary:

Quinn discovers that her girlfriend has Type 1 diabetes. A series of one shots following Quinn and Rachel’s lives together as they learn to cope with the condition as a couple, and the challenges they face along the way.

A Little Bit Longer, And I'll Be Fine. by kxteflxming              

Fandom: Line of Duty (TV 2012)

Rating: Gen

Warning: None Apply

Relationship: Joanne Davidson/Kate Fleming

Wordcount: 8,869, complete

Summary: 

She was knackered today, but she knew she had no choice but to go to work anyway. After all, what excuse did she have?

‘Oh yeah, hi, I can’t come to work because of my diabetes fucking me over that I never told any of you about’?

She had a feeling that one wouldn’t go down too well.

___________________

AKA Jo is a type one diabetic, and through all the highs and lows, Kate is always there.

A Little Tipsy on Your Love by Macremae

Fandom: Pacific Rim

Rating: Explicit

Warning: None Apply

Relationship: Karla Gottlieb/Vanessa Gottlieb

Wordcount: 5,353, complete

Summary:

“Yeah,” Newt says, nodding like this is some kind of fascinating scientific discussion and not the worst day of Vanessa’s entire life, maybe. “You definitely have a lot of adrenaline right now, and probably increased estradiol levels, too. It’s likely affecting your entire endocrine system in an attempt to stimulate reproduction.”

There’s a brief, tense beat of silence as Vanessa registers this statement, then Karla and Hermann, and then Vanessa is shooting out her hand for Karla to yank her phone out of her trouser pocket and shove it towards her, frantically unlocking it and swiping to her Dexcom app. The little number on the screen says one hundred eighty three, with two side by side arrows pointing straight up.

“Bitch,” she tells it in a quiet, disappointed little voice, which of course is the exact moment her high alarm begins screaming at the top of its lungs.

In which our heroines fuck around, find out, and then just fuck.

Lift You Up When You’re Low by @kitkat404

Fandom: The Prom Musical

Rating: Gen

Warning: None Apply

Relationship: Alyssa Greene/Emma Nolan

Wordcount: 1,433

Summary:

Emma’s blood sugar drops during a debate match, her teammates are to the rescue.

Through The Lows and The Highs by MissKateBishop (agathaharknness) @misskatebishop

Fandom: Black Widow (Movie 2021), MCU, Avengers

Rating: Gen

Warning: None Apply

Relationship: Natasha Romonanov/Reader

Rating: Gen

Wordcount: 800, complete

Summary:

Natasha gets home and finds out her girlfriend is not well. Nothing better than cuddling and waiting until the insulin kicks in.

Tryanophobia by frederick_hohenstaufen                

Fandom: Cobra Kai (Web Series)

Rating: Teen and Up

Warning: None Chosen

Relationship: Samantha LaRusso/Tory Nichols

Wordcount: 979, complete

Summary:

Sam has a hard time injecting herself with her insulin. Fortunately, she has Tory for moral support.

[rickwardsinnerhands]

on the subject of being vulnerable

daemon fics tho. they give the exact same sort of vulnerability that the de-aging fics do because the whole point of Daemons is that they're your soul and shit. if you aren't using daemons to spill some character's deep and dirty secrets what are you even doing?? the amount of unsolicited cuddles alone could kill a man.

plus the added intrigue of having you soul manifest as something undeniable?? like u want people to think you're hard?? well tough shit, your daemons a sweet lil fruit bat. ADORABLE, it's a fucking rabbit, CUTE AS HELL. We're the floppiest and bestest doggo. Yee fucking HAAAW

there is also a lack of this for Newt/Hermann

Ya'll I read this one excellent fic where the humans weird trauma/behavior was reflected in their daemons doing weird shit/things considered taboo. LIKE please! the one where someone doesn't get along with their own daemon sends me every time.

gimme Newt with a stupid floppy dog. Gimme Hermann with a bat. Gimme the both of them with predator/prey animals that shouldn't get on but they do! like when cats and rabbits are best friends or whatever. Gimme the good shit.

[bae-science]

i will say it’s good that the ladies and lovers of them in this fandom have been the ones to decide newt and hermann should have been women because i truly guarantee you if they had actually been in the movie, newt would have been in like a miniskirt and ripped tights because ooooooh she’s ~edgy~ completely throwing aside how a gay punk woman in stem would actually dress and hermann would have been like. god sorry gimme a sec i have to vomit. okay sorry she would have had wait fuck wait. okay she i can’t i fucking can’t they would have given her an ankle length skirt and heels and please don’t make me fucking say it jesus christ long hair. geddit because they’re both women. because they’re females. geddit. anyway newt has a jewfro in a diy bi bob and hermann looks exactly the same bc she’s literally butch goodbye

[hermannsthumb]

Could you write another Greaser!Newt sequel? I labsolutely loved the last parts and I'd be happy to read anything you can come up with xD(And if you could make it a first time fic I would love you to pieces xD)

why.........certainly

somewhere in part of the greaser newt cinematic universe found, found here, here, here, and here. probably set after the first one but before the second? setup for this fic also partially inspired by a scene from this AU I recently wrote because it’s too cute to not use

rated 18+ 🌚 MOSTLY anyway

----------------

“This is horrendously cliched of you, you know,” Hermann says.

Newton puts his father’s convertible in park and turns to him with what he clearly hopes is an innocent smile. Hermann does not fall for it: he knows that smile by now, and it’s rarely followed by anything innocent. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Newton says. Then he gives an exaggerated shiver. “Gee, it sure is cold out tonight, huh, Hermann? Need a sweater or something?”

“No,” Hermann says.

“My jacket?” Newton says. “Wanna borrow it?”

“No,” Hermann says.

Newton extends one arm and settles it around Hermann’s shoulders. “How about that? Nice and cozy?”

Hermann glares at him. It is, in fact, very cozy being tucked up that close to Newton, but he is not admitting that to Newton at any cost whatsoever, so he gives an exaggerated shiver of his own to make his point. He perhaps does it too well: Newton is startling and pulling his arm away at once, leaving Hermann feeling oddly disappointed and bereft. “I’m not trying to get fresh or anything,” he tells Hermann seriously, “I swear.”

“Then why, exactly,” Hermann says, “have you taken us here?”

Hermann was not born yesterday. He knows all the young couples in town drive up here to park among the secluded bit of trees for some alone time, and furthermore, that there are about three other cars there tonight with passengers clearly come for that express purpose. Then there is, of course, Newton’s recent behavior towards him, which has bordered on suspiciously sensual. Bold, even. Touching Hermann’s hair while they kiss; putting his hand on Hermann’s knee at the cinema; moving his mouth south of Hermann’s jaw, even, to nip tentatively at his neck before Hermann ultimately shoos him off.

He knows what Newton is hoping for tonight. He simply hasn’t decided if he wants to give it.

Newton’s face splits into a grin. “Okay, maybe I am a little bit. But only if you want. We could just see a movie instead.”

A movie--almost definitely some inane monster flick, where Hermann will get bored halfway through and Newton will insist on explaining half the pseudoscience to him, which will be almost as intolerable as the movie itself. Or...

Hermann undoes the top few buttons of his cardigan and bares his throat to Newton. “You may touch me,” he declares.

The sound Newton makes is halfway between a whimper and a groan; his eyes go straight to the newly-revealed bit of skin. “You mean it?” he says.

Yes, Hermann realizes, yes, he does. Newton is annoying, and obnoxious, and hardly what Hermann would term sweet, but he does have the tendency to make Hermann--very occasionally--smile. Like now. “Yes, Newton,” he says. “Only don’t make a mess of me above the collar. My father--Newton!”

In his haste to climb into Hermann’s lap, Newton knocks into the gear shift and almost sends them flying out of park. “Oops,” he says, divesting Hermann of the rest of his sweater. “How many layers are you wearing, man?”

“A n--normal amount. Newton, ah--” Newton’s teeth go to his neck. “I said--not above the collar.”

“Don’t be a square,” Newton mumbles into his skin. He kisses over the indentation his teeth left behind and shifts in Hermann’s lap. For his small stature, Newton has quite a bit of mass, and he’s putting a strain on Hermann’s knee that isn’t exactly comfortable. Hermann hisses in pain as Newton continues to nip at him.

“Backseat,” he says. “Newton--leg--”

“Aw, fuck,” Newton says. “Right, sorry, sorry, let me--”

They do a bit of an awkward shuffle to the backseat of the car. Newton resumes kissing him, though this time he straddles either side of Hermann’s waist, his knees able to spread out comfortably on the spacious bench. There is a noticeable bulge in the front seat of his denim trousers. “I brought a rubber,” he breathes in Hermann’s ear. “Will you...?”

Hermann shivers. “Not tonight,” he says. “I’ve not prepared for it in the slightest.” These things require preparation, you know. And, besides--the backseat of a borrowed car seems so terribly gauche. Not romantic at all. (Not that Hermann needs it, or anything with Newton, to be romantic.)

Newton laughs again, breath ghosting hot over Hermann’s ear. “I meant you to me,” he says. “I--brought stuff. To do it. You know.”

“Oh,” Hermann says.

Newton produces the condom and a small repurposed honey jar of petroleum jelly. He presses both to Hermann’s fist. “Whenever you want,” he says.

It’s easier said than done. Especially within the confines of such a tight space. Newton manages to get his his t-shirt off and his trousers down as far as his knees before giving it up as a bad job; Hermann doesn't so much as make it down to his undershirt. “I don’t think this is going to work,” Hermann finally declares.

“Aw, c’mon, sweetheart,” Newton whines, “I almost got my shoe off, look, gimme five more--”

Hermann scowls up at him. “Don’t call me sweetheart. We’ll simply have to wait until we’re somewhere more comfortable for all that.” Then, because Newton looks disappointed, and because Hermann’s erection has not subsided in the slightest and he would not mind getting off to some degree: “There's, er, no need to stop kissing me. I did say all that. Do feel free to carry on with everything else.”

“Oh, keen,” Newton says.

[avelera]

Pssst, the COVID19 newmann fic, imagine- Newt with face masks bruises, tired as fuck, seeing Hermann again for the first time after the quarantine period. Hermann is so happy and relieved that he almost goes for a hug, but then he decides that gripping Newt's forearm is more acceptable But Newt is reaching for him too, so their hands touch, the skin on skin contact sending shivers and raising goosebumps all over their skin Maggie pls gimme the pinning and longing pls

Yassssss oh man I may have to write this

[boylikeanangel]

just got hit with the most POWERFUL mental image of the gay awakening you described. hermann was in the backseat of the family car, because they were on a trip, and it was after dark and they were on a highway, and karla had just convinced lars to begrudgingly turn on the radio, and gimme gimme gimme played and got through the chorus and then that one instrumental section hit, you know the one, and that was the Moment. this was so vivid in my mind that i had to share somehow

little hermann just sits there fucking shaking for ten full minutes not knowing what the fuck just happened and he has this incredible 70′s music-induced epiphany that hits him like a 50-ton truck and it’s just “i don’t know what a gay is, but i am one” and that’s where it all starts

[wittygaypuns]

16 and 27 for the writing prompt if you want to, I love your writing :)

Okay, so I totally thought this was 17 and 27 because I can’t read, so I went with it in that way.... uhh hope you enjoy :D

Marriage proposal/keeping the other person warm

“Newton, you'll catch your death likethat. I told you the forecast this morning, did I not?” Hermannsighed to the man, who was unrolling his sleeves hurriedly, jamminghis body against his boyfriends side. It was warm enough in theafternoon when they had first left home, and Newton had mockedHermann thoroughly for bringing “that ridiculous coat”. Thetemperature had since dropped significantly, and the skies seemedturbulent, ready to bury the world in rain or sleet.

“Meteorologists aren't realscientists, they're just weather astrologists! It's always a roll ofthe dice for those con-artists!” Newton exclaimed even as he beganto huddle himself closer, intent on getting inside of the parka, itseemed.

“Newton, that's a ridiculous thing tosay. Meteorology is absolutely a valid form of science. They usehighly advanced measuring tools along with chemistry and maths tomake educated predic-” Hermann explained.

“Hogwash! They're bullshit artists!Weather is chaos, they just throw darts at a board and hope they'reright sometimes!” Newt said, voice a pitch higher than normal.

“If I give you my coat will you stopdenouncing an entire field of study? Good god, Newton.” Hermannsaid. While he spoke, he was already shrugging off the parka. Heliked the way it looked on Newton, anyway. He swam in the garment ina way that made Hermann feel positively burly.

“Me shutting up won't negate the factthat they're glorified palm readers, but yes, gimme.” Newton madelittle grabbing motions with his hands, but paused. “Wait, you'regonna be cold and that bugs you way more than it bugs me.”

“I'm wearing a number of layers, I'llsurvive as long as we hurry home before the storm starts.” Hermannreassured him, pulling the parka off and kissing Newton's forehead ashe offered it out.

“Are you sure? I know it bugs yourhip when you get too cold, I don't wan--” Newton began, his toneswitching from chaotically loud to soft and concerned. A tone onlyever granted to Hermann. Newton was constantly giving Hermann theconsideration that no others ever really did, but only ever inprivate so as not to seem like he was diminishing Hermann. Newt wasconstantly, quietly conscious of Hermann's body in a way that did nottear him down by implying he was weak; he never babied, only checkedin. It was one of the many reasons he loved the strange littlefellow. One of the many reasons he planned to ask Newton to marryhim, if only he could work up the courage.

“Yes, I'm sure. You can warm me upwhen we get home, hm?” Hermann smirked just a little. Newt's eyeswent wide and he grinned that crooked grin that Hermann wanted to seefor the rest of his life.

“I'll spoon you all fuckin' nightbaby.” Newt wiggled his brows as he spoke, jamming his hands intothe parka pockets.

It was then that Hermann realized hismistake, eyes widening for only a moment before he regained hiscomposure. Inside the coats pockets was a little red velvet lined boxcontaining the engagement ring he had planned to propose with thatnight. He silently damned himself for not only failing to propose theway he had wanted; after dinner, as the sun set, atmosphere heavywith the promise of the sort of storm he and Newton loved to watchfrom their enclosed porch. He had tried, but the words caught in histhroat, and the timing seemed off. But now there was the danger thatNewton would find it, and all because he was still too nervous withhis feelings. They had drifted, they had saved the world, they hadgone through hell together, but Hermann still found himself choked upat the thought of Newton loving him the way he did.

“Uh oh. What's that face?” Newtonhad caught his slip up, hands still in the pockets.

“Mm- nothing. I'm fine.” Hermannlied, jaw setting. He hoped Newt would avoid doing what he knew hewould... Newton didn't ever value Hermann's personal space, and nowthat they were a couple, even less so.

“... Whatcha got here?” Newtonsaid, pulling out the box and opening it immediately. When he saw thering mounted in the middle, his eyes went wide and his feet stopped.

“.. Oh my god. Wait.” Newt said.

And then, to Hermann's horror, he burstinto laughter. His heart dropped as the noise he normally loved cutthrough him. The idea of marrying Hermann was that hilarious to Newt?Was it really that far-fetched to assume that after all they had beenthrough, he would want it to be legally binding? He knew Newt wasn'ta fan of traditional convention, but damn it, they had discusseditbefore! They had spoken about their idea of a perfect honeymoon, andwho they wouldn't invite to the wedding itself... Was Hermann reallysuch a fool for thinking it? The pain in his heart must havetranslated to his expression; Newton stopped laughing.

Onlythen did Hermann see the tears pouring down his cheeks in messylittle rivulets.

Onlythen did he see that Newt had something in his other hand.

“Wereyou gonna propose to me, dude?” Newt said, voice cracking.

“I– yes, but I lost the nerve...” Hermann said, a hand moving tobrush the tears from his cheeks.

WhenNewt looked up, he was grinning just a little.

“Fuck, Herms. Me too.” He laughed again, opening his other hand. “Allthrough dinner I wanted to like, yell it at you, but I kept gettingall choked up...”

“...What?” Hermann said, looking to his hand. In Newt's palm was asimilar box, kaiju-blue in color. Hermann took it, opening it to seea remarkably similar engagement ring mounted inside.

“...Why don't we say it on three?” Newt said, voice soft and full ofjoy.

“O-ofcourse.” Hermann's heart swelled, feeling full to bursting asNewton counted.

One,

Two,

Three--

“Newton,will you marry me?”“Hermann, will you marry me?”

[avelera]

Man, is there anything better than loser characters? 

I don’t want badasses who can smirk their way through any problem and pull off their hijinks with effortless cool. Gimme characters who excel at exactly one (1) plot relevant thing and besides that their life is a mess of failure and embarrassment. 

Case in point:

Peter B. Parker. Effortlessly walking up and down the wall while he thinks, able to pull off incredible feats of acrobatics and superhero-ing. Manages to free himself from being tied to a punching bag, take the goober off Miles, and infiltrate a high-security lab basically without thinking about it. He is incredibly good at being Spider-Man.

...And a complete and total loser at just about every other part of his life, but god do we love this sad disaster man. 

Other cases can include my fandom darlings like Newt Geiszler (very good Kaiju biologist, utter failboat at so much else) and Hermann Gottlieb (a world class genius mathematician who otherwise says things like By Jove! when he gets excited and dresses like your Aunt Gladys). 

Or Bilbo Baggins, basically the World’s Worst Adventurer except he’s very good at fast talking his way out of bad situations. Joe Miller from the Expanse is such a bad detective that his entire office thinks he’s a joke and they stick the rookies with him as a punishment, but he’s got just enough skills from his long time in that career & the sheer bloody mindedness of not giving a fuck anymore that he manages to basically save Earth. Or, just to get a woman here but admittedly women aren’t as often give the range of characters so it’s harder to pick out good examples of this, Eleanor Shellstrop from The Good Place, total dirtbag by her own admission, but she is a superhero at scamming systems. 

Hey self, next time maybe instead of thinking of all the good things a character can do then giving them a flaw as a cherry on top, consider giving characters all the flaws and then find one redeeming ability that will help them solve the plot that they’re incredibly good at. 

[hermannsthumb]

for the autumn fic meme... 11, 24 and 28 if you please but honestly all of them are great and I can't really choose, those prompts yeeted me into fall mode and I love everything you write; go wild mrs. Maria, we love you

from autumn fic meme here: 11. Pumpkin Patch + 24. Warm Sweaters + 28. Flannel Shirt

I WILL GO WILD!! thank u for permission i love you too. (sidenote about 4 of you asked for flannel shirt lmaoooo)

——————————————————————————

“This one?” Hermann says. “It seems sturdy.”

“Nah,” Newt says. “Not round enough.”

Hermann frowns. He taps his pumpkin of choice with the end of his cane. “It’s a pumpkin,” he says. “It’s inherently round.”

“Not that one,” Newt says. He squats down in the dirt next to it and turns it so Hermann can see the opposite side: while it was round from Hermann’s perspective, from Newt’s, it’s tragically malformed (probably grew from the vine at a weird angle) and nowhere near worthy of sitting on their front porch. Why, perish the very thought. “It’s a little flat here, see. We’ll be the laughing stock of the entire neighborhood.” He gets to his feet with a grunt and dusts off his jeans. “Let’s keep looking.”

“Laughing stock,” Hermann repeats under his breath in a mutter, then louder, “It’s a bloody pumpkin, Newton. We’ll just carve the other side. No one will even care. Or know.”

“I’ll care and know. I want our pumpkin to be perfect,” Newt declares. He twines his fingers with Hermann’s, cuff of his flannel shirt brushing Hermann’s skin, and tugs him forward. “Hurry up, the farm’s closing soon, and I still wanna buy squash from the market.” He’s planning on making something fun for dinner tomorrow night with it.

Hermann stumbles after him with an even deeper frown than before, clinging to Newt’s wrist. Of all people, Newt thought Hermann—king of perfection himself, the fussiest, most particular person Newt knows—would get it. An imperfect pumpkin means an imperfect carving, and Newt doesn’t want an imperfect carving, because that means an imperfect Halloween. Which won’t do. It’s their first Halloween together together, after all. “How about that one?” Hermann says, pointing at another—slightly rounder, now they’re talking—pumpkin resting a few feet away.

Unfortunately— “Too green,” Newt says.

Another one is too yellow. The one after that, too dirty. (“We can rinse it off,” Hermann says, but Newt’s already moved on.) Too small. Too big. “I’m beginning to think you don’t actually want a pumpkin,” Hermann finally says, after the fifth one Newt vetoes (on the grounds of it being, uh, too pumpkin-y), “and that you’ve dragged me here under false pretenses.”

“False pretenses?” Newt says innocently, and then holds up his phone. “Before you answer—gimme a big smile. I need a new wallpaper.” His current one is Hermann on their July beach vacation, and though he loves the sight of Hermann’s stupid tunic and comically floppy sunhat, he needs something a little more seasonal. The lighting right now is perfect, too. “Come on, before the sun sets for real.”

“False pretenses,” Hermann echoes with a huff, and—begrudgingly—dusts some dirt off his knit sweater, readjusts his scarf, and gives Newt one of his stiffest smiles yet.

For Hermann, any smile is a fucking rarity, so Newt takes it, and the picture, without complaint. He takes a lot of pictures, actually: Hermann standing and smiling stiffly, Hermann holding up a small pumpkin (at Newt’s request), Hermann mid-shout (are you finished yet?, to which Newt replied with a few wolf-whistles and a yeah, work it, grandpa, flash me some sock garters, you sexy thing, scandalous!), Hermann pointing at another pumpkin and rolling his eyes, Hermann shouting for real this time, and then, finally, Newt hops in for few selfies.

“I definitely didn’t just drag you here to take cute pics of you on a farm,” Newt says, scrolling through them with his screen angled towards Hermann. And he didn’t, really, he wants that perfect pumpkin, and he wants to carve a big dinosaur into it, these are big priorities, but no harm in a slight detour. “If I did, though, can you blame me?”

“Yes,” Hermann says. “Delete this one.”

It’s the one of him holding up the pumpkin. (Newt was right—the lighting had been perfect. Pretty and orange-gold.) With Hermann’s oversized grey sweater tucked into his too-long corduroys, the sleeves that extend beyond his knuckles, and his saddle shoes, he looks like a frumpy little kid on a class field trip. It’s adorable. “Not a chance,” Newt says, tucking the phone against his chest before Hermann can snatch it away. “I’m framing it. That’s going on our mantle.”

“We don’t have a mantle,” Hermann says, “and if we did, there is not a chance I would allow that.” He swipes for the phone anyway. “Delete it, Newton.”

“I want you to sit on the old tractor they have at the front before we leave, too,” Newt says. “Oh my God, that’s gonna look so cute.” He can picture it now: Hermann, sitting on one side of the seat, scowling and crossing his arms and three seconds from beating Newt over the head with his cane. Adorable. Hermann is even less impressed with that idea. “Aw, come on—look, this one’s cute!”

He shows him the first of the selfies he took. Newt, his arm around Hermann’s shoulder, collar of his flannel popped and lopsided, his lips (curled into a big smile) pressed to Hermann’s cheek; Hermann, half-frowning, half-blushing. He’s stealing an actual kiss from Hermann in the next. He quickly posts that one to Instagram with a few choice emojis (jack-o-lantern, ghost, some kiss marks) and pockets his phone before Hermann can stop him.

“You’re intent on embarrassing me tonight,” Hermann says. 

“Of course not, honey,” Newt says. “Now please stop wasting time and help me find a pumpkin already, jeez.”