#garbage has always been a strange beast of a band

[gentleoverdrive]

[4/300] It makes me sad most of the time.

My wife is fast asleep, so I am going to let you in on a little secret, dear reader: You see, my wife? I love her. She literally saved me from falling into irreparable despair and burnout, and for that, she will have my eternal loyalty, both as a life-partner, as a lover, as a husband, as a friend, you name it. ---- I want you all to know this because, despite what I've written about in the past or what I will write about in the future, I am, indeed, a most fortunate man, and I genuinely, un-ironically and unconditionally love my wife with everything I have. She is my girlboss and i am her malewife. I tell you this as a secret because I know for a fact that, just like my daughter, she's not all that fond of social media, so it's unlikely that she'll ever read this, but I want YOU to know. ---- I want you to know that I, a rando on the internet you may have at some point interacted with. is indeed non-ironically blessed to be married to the woman whom with I shared three of the craziest years this period of history has decided to throw at us. And if I ever came to that same crossroads, I would, no bullshit, pick you again as my life partner. I love you. ---- And to my secret keeper(s)? Thank you so much for reading, I'll read you later. alligator!

[hornyorca]

The hunt.

Dark!Alpha!Ubbe x Omega!Reader.

I’m just gonna leave this here and we’re never going to talk about it ever again. Dark!Ubbe is really fucking hot though, can we agree? 

@ivartrash​ @bitchccraft​ @dani-si​

fucking kill me

Warning: A/B/O au!, smut, filth, probably non-con because i’m disgusting garbage, dark!ubbe is really hot, oral(giving/receiving), exhibition, unprotected sex(wrap it before you tap it kiddos), slapping, choking, name calling, spanking, hair pulling, dub/sub, some spitting, breeding kink, vaginal fingering, dirty talk, probably some anal fingering too, biting, scratching, infliction of pain, probably abusive content, cream pies, and this basically just starts out as a rape scene and just... i’m really sorry. 

You had tried so hard. 

Gods know how much you had tried to escape the natural desire that ached deep in your abdomen, like a fire threatening to burn down your walls, but as you continued to trek on with legs like steel, not even the cold air that howled like the beast on your trail could extinguish you. Perhaps it was your pride that forced you to flee, only making this a game for the hunter behind you, adding to his twisted arousal. It was folly, your intense denial, thinking that you could out-run nature in it’s course  — thinking you could out-run Ubbe Ragnarsson. 

He could fucking smell you, no matter where you hid, even in the blinding blizzard that was slowly making it’s way to Kattegat, and by Valhalla above could you smell him too. There would be no safe haven for you. Not even Odin himself could keep the prince off your trail now.. or off your body, would be more appropriate for your current situation.

The large hand that wrapped around the back of your neck, blunt fingers digging into your veins and for a moment you couldn’t breath, sheer power forced you backwards until rough bark dug through the fabric of your dress. You met those blue eyes you loved so much in your younger days, but lately have come to fear. It was almost gently that his hand began to trace the line of your jaw, yet you could not avoid twitching back in fear, something he either didn’t notice or failed to care about. “You have avoided me for far too long, little one,” His deep voice, intoxicating to your mind, reached more than just your ears as your legs subconsciously rubbed together, trying to ease the ache, and they were only coated in arousal. “And it appears  — “ His nostrils flared, the corner of his mouth curling up. “ — you missed me as well.”

“No!” You shouted, trying to jerk your face out of his grip, but he held fast around your throat, a sudden anger and darkness flashing through those beautiful pools you often dreamed of drowning in. 

He echoed: “No?” Fingers around your throat tightening, gaze leaving your to settle on your left hand, the little band around your fingers glimmering. It suddenly felt heavy, almost as though it could sink through your skin. Ubbe’s chuckle was sardonic, his head tilting slightly, watching your nails dig into his wrist. “I see... yet it is not your husband you run to out of protection from me, but the middle of a barren forest where no one could hear your screams.”

“Because,” You rasped, and despite the fear coursing your body, the animalistic side of you could not help but admire and whine over his display of strength. “You would of killed him.”

His grip tightened, threatening to cut off your airway, and there was no emotion written on his face as he spoke, a deep promise to every syllable. “And yet I still will.” There was not a single word of his you doubted. “To simply think that he has touched you, filled you, even inhaled your scent sickens me, and I plan to rip off the hands that have felt what is mine.”

There were things that single word did to you, and you tried to convince yourself it was not your fault, you could not control it. You had no control over the twisting of your abdomen, the wetness gushing from your core and the way your spine arched towards Ubbe. But a sensible part of you spoke: “But I am not yours.”

Something inside of Him seemed to snap, any amount of self-control or humanity the man had left in his being drifted away with the cold air around you. His hand left your neck, tangling deep into your hair and he yanked your head back and up, leaving you at a strange angle. “You are mine! You have always been mine! No matter who’s family name you hold, I will do what I have too.”

There was no lie, not in any of his words as he continued to pull at your locks. Even when you were younger, there was an attraction between the two of you that was undeniable, and his mother had even claimed that she foresaw the two of you pairing. At the time, despite his nature, Ubbe did not want to force you into something you did not want nor ready for. He had been so sweet, so kind, and so caring towards you and wanting you to be at your own free-will, to choose who you desire. You had done so, ignoring the pull that tried to drag you back to him, and he accepted you choice to marry another man, him with his own plans to marry a pretty slave girl named Margarethe, but it all changed the hour after your ceremony. There was not a day you did not see the man who was once your best friend, and it was obvious he was no longer the same as we was before  — he was rougher, more ragged, less stable, violent. 

One would dare say he was worse than his youngest brother.

It was now the lengths you realized the attraction ran, how vulnerable the right alpha could really make you. Your mother had always told you stories of bonded-pairs and just how much power was between them, but you always believed them to be such stories, until the relationship you held with your husband suddenly felt less important and almost non-existent. But you were stubborn, and you were loyal, something the prince had always adored about you, and now it only seemed to annoy him as it was not for him.

No matter how much you wanted too bury your fingers in his hair, to rip your own dress in half, a large part of you felt betrayed as he continued to break the promise he made long ago. Your muscles acted before your brain really thought out the consequences, the palm of your hand stinging as it met his cheek with force. There was a moment of pure silence, where even the storm raging in the mountains made no sound and you could of gotten away with fast feet, but your fight-or-flight response froze, and no matter how hard you screamed at yourself, you were drilled.

Ubbe’s head had turned to the side, not preparing himself for the hit, but when his eyes met yours, you wanted to puke at the predatory blackness that invaded them. There was only a thin ring of blue, his pupils exploded and you vaguely wondered if this would be the last thing you would ever see. Whether you were fortunate or not to have turned up wrong, you had yet to decide, even as he retaliated with the back of his hand, sending you to the snow covered ground with a painful yelp. Past your shock quickly, you tried to scramble up, but his boot digging into your upper back slammed you back down, and you began to shake not only from the cold, but from fear and pure disgusting arousal. 

Your vision was filled with white, your face inches from suffocating in the blanket on the forest floor as the heel dug into your spine. “It appears that your husband as not broken in you in yet..” Came his words, and the sound of leather grinding had you muscles quivering in anticipation, readying for whatever was to come. “That is good. It leaves more fun for me.” 

A scream ripped through your dry throat as leather nipped your skin through the fabric of your dress, beating across your rear, and your nails curled into the ground to steady yourself. But you sobbed as your body betrayed you, lifting your ass into the air, a silent plead for me, and the wet spot on your skirt was undeniable. How could could you go, feigning that you didn’t enjoy this? 

Who were you to deny the knots of fate?

His laugh mocked you, the end of his belt trailing along your lower back. “Well, look at this, you little slut... you enjoy this.” The growl from Ubbe’s lips only had you mewling pathetically, giving in to all he had to offer you. This was nature, and you could not fight it. Feeling his foot shift, there was suddenly cold air on the hot skin he had been abusing and flowing to your dripping core, forcing a hiss through your teeth. “Oh, Gods... yes,” A part of you expected him to move off you, not to drop, straddling your lower back and your thighs moving on their own accord as his large paws gripped each cheek, spreading them until there was burn. 

Even as an awkward angle, there was not an inch of your cunt that he missed with his tongue, or even when he would scrape his teeth over the sensitive flesh, his facial hair leaving red marks as it rubbed. His onslaught seemed to last hours, having you tighten around his tongue once before he began to add his fingers, thrusting three in at a time, knuckles deep, and when his breath disappeared from skin before something wet landed against your tighter muscles, that was the second time you released. His name was like a prayer falling from your lips, your body bucking the forest floor as you rode out your second orgasm, whimpering from the loss of his fingers as he pulled back, but everything still as the tip of one finger traveled up your rear, circling the quivering muscles of your forbidden hole. “I wonder,” His voice mused, turning into a groan as the tip of finger slid past the first ring of muscles too easily from the natural lubricant that was on it. “If you have ever had this hole used.” He began pumping it slowly, watching you jerk slightly, and the sound from your mouth muffled by the ground. “I fucking love it.”

It was then the weight from your back was gone, as was his fingers and his hands were force your hips high into the air, putting everything you owned on display. Ubbe’s warmth was gone, leaving your sweat soaked body to shiver in the cold winter wind, but the part of your mind that was still coherent noticed that snow around you had melted against your body heat. “Ubbe, ple  — “

Another snap, earning another scream, your body jumping forward. “That is not what you will call me, Omega.”

“Yes, Alpha,” You practically purred, surprising yourself as you pushed your rear up more, practically presenting yourself to him.

His moan was unmistakable, his fingers kneading bruises into your flesh before he left you completely, clicking his tongue as the from of his boots met your vision. Once again, you were yanked up by your hair, pain shooting through your neck and back as he forced you onto your knees in front of him, and his member stood erect, almost laying back against his stomach. “Do not think you will be rewarded for nothing, whore,” A thick hand wrapped around his cock, slowly stroking himself as he leered down at you. “You have taken control of this situation and made me wait far too long, and now, it is my turn.”

Immediately you went to work, his hand becoming replaced with yours and your watering mouth was all over him, relishing in the salty taste of his skin and pre-cum. Any rational part of you would of confirmed that you may of been too into pleasing him, but it felt just as good as it felt wrong, the coldness of your wedding band leaving a trail each time your mouth bobbed after your hand. “Fuck, you are taking me so well, like a perfect little whore...” Ubbe coo’d, the hand that wasn’t practically crushing your skull began caressing your face. “That is what you are, isnt it? A little omega whore, swallowing cock while her husband waits at home for her to return...” Shame should of been filling your body, disgust should of been on your face, but all you could do was shudder at his words and gush, flicking your eyes up to him through thick lashes. Pure lust clouded your vision, but you could see his beautiful features clearly. “I bet you’d like that wouldn’t you? If he saw us now... Walked through those trees and watched your hungry mouth take me, that needy little cunt of yours begging to be fucked hard... I bet you’re just clenching around air right now, aren’t you? Wishing you had this in you? Feel so empty, don’t you Omega?”

The whimper around his cock had his hips snapping faster, fucking himself into your throat as your tongue swirled, and he was growling. Your fingers were clawing, digging into his thighs as little oxygen was reaching your lungs each time he would slip down. “Swallow every drop and you’ll be gaping wide for weeks.”

In that moment, it wasn’t just him cumming, holding himself in deep to make sure every little bit was consumed by you, but it was also you drenching the ground once again, your cheeks flushing at the thought, though you should of been past the embarrassment by now. It took a few seconds, be he eventually slipped himself out, practically pushing you back, letting you hit the cold ground once more. You laid there, knees bent, and arms out, spent and lax, watching him standing sturdy, chest heaving and beads of sweat running to delicious places.

“Tired already?” Ubbe feigned sympathy, stalking towards you, kicking your legs open with one foot, watching them spread and fall open for him. “Do not get comfortable yet, my little one, I am not done with you yet.” Instantly he was on top of you, blanketing your body with his, encasing you in his warmth. 

For the first time in forever, no matter how many times your husband had claimed you or simply kissed you, there had been no feeling like the one as your true alpha molded his lips to yours, grinding his hard member against your slick entrance. His tongue, his teeth, his smell, his taste, and everything that your hands grasped onto as you continued to ride each other on, was nothing like you had ever felt. You were full, complete, like something had fallen into the right piece and you felt at peace, even as he continued to ravish down your cheek, jaw and neck. But as he gave one single thrust, bringing himself home, you had never been stretched so far, every little crevice becoming filled with him, and it came forth like a pack of howling wolves  —  the two of your shouting in your first taste of true pleasure.

He did not move right away, despite your wiggling, your nails digging along his skin, your voice begging for him to just claim you. One of his hands squeezed your cheeks, and he whispered in your ear, silencing your pleads before he began to lift from you, the hand on your cheeks clawing down your body and leaving red marks in the wake up his blunt nails, his free hand digging into your thigh as he rested on his knees. “ As much as I would love to feel you squirm under me, I want to watch this sopping cunt take every inch as I pound you raw.” And there was a slap to your thigh, marking his promise before he began the snapping of his hips, forcing your back to scratch against the cold ground with every thrust he made. Ubbe’s hand shot up, gripping around your throat and pushing down, holding you in place.

He was like a wild man, pounding you into the dirt, bruising your pelvic each time his body collided with yours, his sweat dripping onto your burning skin, and the manic look in his eye as he continued to hold your gaze. There was no possibility of looking away  — the hunter caught his pray, and you were going to be devoured whole. “How long I let this walk around freely, when I could of claimed you years ago and nothing could of been done. You would of have no choice but to accept this, me, my seed. But now..” Ubbe growled, his tight body leaning over you, bring his face closer to yours, his teeth biting at your cheek. “Now you will be dripping with my cum and soon, you womb will be stretching with my pups. I will claim you, and I will fuck you in the blood of that worthless beast you call husband if I must to show you who you belong too, whore.”

Slowly, it came down to the point where neither of you could form a coherent sentence, only carnal screams and growls mixed in the air with the smell of sweat and slick, only raising your senses higher as his movements became sloppy, uncoordinated, but faster than before and harder. You were so close, that large knot in your stomach slowly unraveling, but it wasn’t until his teeth suddenly sank into your neck, small beads of blood escaping did you lose control of your body movements — spasms erupted through you as you bucked against him and thrashed around on the floor, your nails breaking the skin of his back, and he began to swell up inside of you before spurts of warmth spilled. 

“This is me, this is my cum filling your womb and no one else’s, this is my cum painting your walls,” Ubbe gasped, feeling how tight you clenched around him, the feeling of his knot tugging at your walls almost painfully pleasurable. “And it will be my cum dripping down your thighs as you return to your husband to pack your belongings.”

There was a moment of silence as his words set in, as the pain began to spread across the open mark on your mating gland, as he slipped out of your core and left you cold and lonely despite his hands running along your skin, as essence of him began to dribble from you. Your eyes like a storm stared up into the sky, watching the snow fall down more heavily than before, and suddenly a cloak was tossed on your form. “Fix your clothes, and I will meet you at your cabin in a little bit. Return the wedding ring to your husband and give him my regards while you’re gathering your things, my darling wife.”

[coolgreatwebsite]

Cool Games I Finished In 2017 (In No Real Order)

Civilization The year is nearing its end, so that means it’s once again time for one of these. 2017 has been rough for pretty much everyone, but even divorced from the state of the world this was unquestionably the worst year of my life. 2017 was a goddamn nightmare where nearly everything went wrong for me in the most major way possible. Consequently I didn’t get to do as much writing as I would have liked, and I ended up playing fewer games with almost all of them being 2017 releases. But! The video games were very fun!! So it all cancels out!!! Everything’s okay!!!! Here’s a bunch of cool games I experienced for the first time in 2017.

Dandy Dungeon: Legend of Brave Yamada (iOS, 2017)

Dandy Dungeon is weird as hell, which makes sense given that it was made by a lot of people who originally worked on games like Chulip and Freshly-Picked Tingle’s Rosy Rupeeland. It’s a free-to-play phone game that’s sort of a cross between a puzzle game and a dungeon crawler. Guide your semi-nude hero Yamada to the exit of the 5x5 dungeon grid in a single line, trying to touch every tile along the way, gathering treasure and beating up enemies to level up. Solving the floors and making the perfect line is satisfying, the story and enemies are all very strange, and there's a ton of content. The free-to-play monetization isn’t too obtrusive either, you can either buy straight up convenience features like unlimited energy and a mid-dungeon item storage system or buy rice balls that can be used as gacha entries or continues if you die in a dungeon and don’t want to give up your treasure. I felt 100% okay with giving the weirdos who made this game money. The same people put out another game this year, Million Onion Hotel, and I barely put any time into it because I just kept playing Dandy Dungeon. I’m very much looking forward to really playing that whenever the hell I finally burn out on this.

Yakuza 0 (PlayStation 4, 2017)

Yakuza 0 is a hell of a game, and a hell of an introduction to the Yakuza series for anyone who hasn’t played it. Set in 1988, the game follows series mainstays Kiryu and Majima as they deal with the events that made them who they are in the games to follow. While I ended up still liking Yakuza 5 more if only for the sheer scope and variety of it, Yakuza 0 is very easily the second best game in the series. It has one of the most straightforward, coherent and engaging narratives out of all of them, it pulls off its setting so well that it made me sort of nostalgic for an era I wasn’t even alive for, and the localization/writing is unquestionably the best the series has had. Almost every single sidequest is funny or memorable in some way and I just can’t say that about the rest of the games. It’s not flawless. The combat unsurprisingly pulls very heavily from Yakuza 5 but with multiple fighting styles for Kiryu and Majima taking the place of multiple characters, and I mostly found myself just sticking with one style for each of them. Beast and Breaker were just too good. The story, while mostly good as previously stated, does have its stumbling points. Some characters and events definitely aren’t given enough breathing room, mostly on the Majima side of things, and weirdly enough the game holds back on having Kiryu and Majima interact for the most part. Overall though, Yakuza 0 is a fantastic encapsulation of why I love this series so damn much and the absolute best jumping on point a newcomer could ask for. Plus Space Harrier is in it! Every game is better when you can also play Space Harrier.

NieR: Automata (PlayStation 4, 2017)

I feel like every year I do one of these lists there’s a game where I start off by saying “This game is good, but”. NieR: Automata is this year’s game. NieR: Automata is a good game, but I did not have the fervent, visceral reaction to it that most other people seem to have had, and my feelings are muddied even further by the lingering feeling that I SHOULD have. I love the first NieR. It’s one of my favorite games of all time. I love PlatinumGames. They’re one of my favorite developers of all time. Yet I came away from Automata somewhat... I don’t know if it’s disappointed. I guess “left wanting” might be a more accurate description? Again, don’t get me wrong here, this is a good game. There’s a lot to like in NieR: Automata. It’s a wild ride, but for me that’s... kind of it? The game shuttles you from crazy setpiece to crazy setpiece, but the second I stopped to think about anything that happened in any sort of detail it all just got real murky. I didn’t feel connected to any of the characters, outside two exceptions, and one of those is a character from the first game that I already loved. NieR: Automata’s storytelling is much more reliant and focused on its themes and imagery than anything that really actually happens during the course of the story, and I’ve never been a huge fan of narratives like that. I need a strong connection to characters and events and places, and whereas the first NieR had that by the truckload, Automata super doesn’t. There’s also the part where a lot of what Automata does, I feel the original game did better. Automata’s music is good, but NieR’s is better. The multiple playthrough system feels like it’s just tacked on because the first game did it, where in the original it was absolutely vital to that game’s story. Same goes for the choice you make in the final ending. The most I can say as far as improvements go is that the combat, while about as mindless, certainly looks better and overall the sidequests are less tedious and grindy. It’s been a very weird experience seeing the huge, widespread positive reaction to this game essentially mirror my feelings on the first game while I’m just sort of left to grumble about how the first game did all that better under my breath. Not that I’m not glad it got a positive reception! It’s great that this game has been such a success and that so many people have finally had their Yoko Taro Moment™. Like I’ve gone out of my way to state multiple times: the game is still good. There’s some wild shit to see in NieR: Automata, and while it didn’t leave a positive lasting impression on me, I very much had a good time with it in the moment.

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

I thought I was done with open world games. I had pretty much decided I was two years ago. I was so tired of the checklists, the boring traversal, the endless swaths of fucking nothing between mission A and mission B, the heaps of useless collectible garbage littering the ground trying to trick you into thinking you’re doing something. I was perfectly content with never playing an open world game again, and when Nintendo started promoting the new Zelda with that familiar Bethesda-esque “go any direction, climb any mountain” rhetoric and showed you climbing towers to reveal the map, I for all intents and purposes checked the fuck out. I didn’t care that it was Zelda, I didn’t care that it was Nintendo, I was just fucking done with all of that... I thought. The more time went on, the more impressions got out, and the more impressions got out, the more of my individual sticking points seemed to have been addressed. Yeah, you climb towers, but all that does is fill in the topography of the map. You don’t get flooded with a million activity and collectible icons, it’s up to you to scope out what looks interesting. And most importantly, while the landmass is large, there’s always something around the corner. I decided to get Breath of the Wild along with my Switch and I’m so glad I did. If I hadn’t been whittled down by pre-release chatter I would have missed out on one of the best games I’ve ever played. It’s like Nintendo explicitly set out to fix every problem I had with open world games. The way the systems in the world interact with each other, how much of a joy it is to explore and traverse the terrain, and the fact that there really IS always something to find make for a breathtaking game. If you go in any direction, you’ll trip over dozens of neat things to do and see. If you climb any mountain, there’s a good chance there will be something waiting for you at the top (and along the way), from a simple Korok seed puzzle to a full-blown shrine dungeon. The game gives you no truly firm direction once you leave the tutorial area, so it really is up to you to explore and find what you want. You can even run straight for the final boss if you want! The traditional Zelda-style puzzles are all super smart and satisfying to solve. I even liked the Divine Beast dungeons and boss fights, which I feel like I’m in the minority about. I finally took on Ganon after about 100 hours of playing the game and I hadn’t been so sad that a game was over since I beat Persona 3. Breath of the Wild is just an incredible, once in a lifetime game. I can’t wait to do it all again next year when I do another playthrough with all the DLC.

Persona 5 (PlayStation 4, 2017)

Persona 3 will likely always be nearest and dearest to my heart, but Persona 5 is objectively the best Persona game. They’ve polished the Persona formula to such a perfect mirror sheen in this one and I’ve never seen a game so consistently and effortlessly ooze such a concentrated amount of liquid capital-“S” Style before. The plot doesn’t intimately revolve around the cast to the degree Persona 4′s does, but they’ve made another charming band of anime teens nonetheless. They’ve either restored or re-worked nearly every mechanical aspect that was dropped between Persona 3 and 4. The soundtrack is incredible, there’s actually a decent amount of non-party S-Links again, the end of the game sticks the landing in a way Persona 4 very much does not... I could keep going. Persona 5 just plain rules. It’s the only game in the series where (even though I haven’t yet) I’ve actually wanted to jump in and do a New Game+ run.

Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

As I may have mentioned in a certain other article from this year, I have had very little love for Wonder Boy over the years. That changed a bit when I decided to try out Monster World IV a few years ago, and I think I’m officially a Wonder Boy Liker after playing The Dragon’s Trap. A remake of Wonder Boy 3 for the Master System, Dragon’s Trap is essentially just an extremely pretty coat of paint on a very early Metroidvania sort of game, but it’s remarkable how well the core gameplay holds up. You start as a human and very early on you’re transformed into a dragon, and you explore the world until you reach a boss which, upon being defeated, transforms you into a mouse. Your mouse form has the ability to enter narrow spaces and stick to certain walls, which allows you to reach new areas, bosses and transformations. Defeated enemies drop coins that you can use to purchase new weapons and armor from shops hidden across the world. It’s fairly simple, but I think that’s the reason it’s still so enjoyable today. The controls are tight and responsive and it doesn’t really date itself in too many ways. They went to great lengths to recreate the original game, down to being able to swap between the remade and classic graphics and music with a button press. Old passwords from the original game even work in the remake. The new art and music are beautiful and the game is the perfect length to not overstay its welcome. You can tell the people who made this really love the original game, and they absolutely did right by it.

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard (PlayStation 4, 2017)

I never in a million years expected to like Resident Evil 7 as much as I did. I played the demo back when it came out and thought it was okay, and I mainly got the full game so I could play something on my PSVR. It’s kind of crazy how, after so many years of Resident Evil stumbling, Capcom managed to just get everything back on track just like that. They made Resident Evil tense and scary again. The VR is insanely effective but even playing through on a regular ol’ TV, which I did multiple times after my initial VR playthrough, they manage to capture a really good, persistent sense of dread. For most of the game, anyway. The last third definitely slips a bit too far back into action game territory, and while it’s still enjoyable it’s definitely weaker than what came before. I beat this for the first time right before the next game on the list came out, and even while super deep into that I couldn’t stop thinking about Resident Evil 7. I really need to go back and play all the DLC.

Super Mario Odyssey (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

2017 was Nintendo’s year. They released my favorite console in a good long while with the Switch, launched it with one of the greatest games of all time, and closed out the year with another incredible game in Super Mario Odyssey. Mario Odyssey has finally dethroned Mario 64 as my favorite 3D exploration Mario game. It’s like Breath of the Wild in that there’s something to find in every nook and cranny, but condensed down into multiple, more tightly designed areas. It’s an absolute joy to play. I 100%ed the game and not once in the 50-ish hours that took did I get tired of controlling Mario. The movement options all flow together so naturally and complement the spaces you explore so well. Landing a long jump > hat throw > dive > hat bounce > dive combo across a huge gap was the most satisfying thing in the world to pull off even as I grabbed the very last power moon. The variety of the worlds and challenges and things to capture kept me in a constant state of excitement about what was coming up next, and the game is consistently charming in both weird new ways and a couple of very effective nostalgic ones. My only real complaints are that I think it’s maybe the easiest Mario game ever made, and I wish more of the platforming challenges were baked into the worlds proper instead of cordoned off into their own little challenge rooms, but basically everything else about the game manages to make those minor somehow. Mario Odyssey is distilled happiness in video game form, and the world needs more of that.

Sonic Mania (PlayStation 4, 2017)

Ohhhh myyyyy Goddddddddddddd Sonic Mania. I cannot fucking believe how awesome Sonic Mania is. I love the Genesis Sonic games so fucking much and while I like Sonic Adventure 1 despite itself, there hasn’t been a good Sonic game since Sonic 3 & Knuckles. The Genesis games always were and will always be great fucking video games, despite what internet fuckboys say because Sonic’s an easy target to dunk on. I’ll take Sonic 3 & Knuckles over Super Mario World any day of the fucking week. Fight me. I’ll cut you. With Sonic Mania, there is FINALLY, fucking TWENTY-THREE GODDAMN YEARS LATER, a legitimately great Sonic The Hedgehog game again, and I’m stunned. I was INSANELY skeptical about this game from the minute it was announced until basically the moment I played it. Yeah, they brought in people from the hacking and fan-game community to work on this one instead of letting Sonic Team touch it, but I’m close enough to those communities to know that that on its own is NOT enough to guarantee the game would be good. Yeah, Taxman and Stealth made an extremely good replica of the Sonic 1-3&K engine, but they absolutely did not have the design chops to tackle anything but ports successfully. That new version of Hidden Palace they added into the iOS port of Sonic 2 was a complete trash fire. Thankfully they linked up with PagodaWest Games, a company made up of a lot of the non-insane elements behind the old Sonic 2 HD project, who as it turns out very much did have the design chops. Together they made something incredible. It obviously controls perfectly given the engine, but the levels are so fun and well-crafted. The classic levels manage to mix in so many different elements from other levels that didn’t quite make it in the game on top of there being weird twists on those on TOP of all the completely new elements, and the brand new levels are lavish with all sorts of super fun new gimmicks and details. The game looks fucking gorgeous, going for a sort of “what if they had made a 2D Sonic for the Saturn” look that it pulls off great, even going so far as to render the special stages in low-poly 3D. The music is P-H-E-N-O-M-E-N-A-L, sounding like a lost ‘90s Japanese arrange CD but without all the bad aspects that usually come with those. There’s so many dumb, great little details for hardcore classic Sonic and Sega fans littered throughout the game. They managed to fucking combine Oil Ocean and Sandopolis, my least favorite zone from Sonic 2 and one of the worst zones in the entire SERIES, and have me come away from it not hating it. It’s masterful. It’s beautiful. It’s right up there with Sonic 3 & Knuckles for best in the series. Nothing this year made me so genuinely, personally delighted. Sonic Mania was made just for me and I love it and I want another one with all original levels as soon as possible. Please let these people make video games for me forever.

Xenoblade Chronicles 2 (Nintendo Switch, 2017)

The original Xenoblade is one of my favorite RPGs of the last generation. Then they released Xenoblade Chronicles X for the Wii U and broke my goddamn heart. They tossed out nearly everything I loved about the first game in favor of haphazardly dumping as many disjointed game mechanics as they could on top of bland open world exploration and needlessly grindy progression. It was such a hard swerve that by the time they had gotten around to announcing a proper Xenoblade 2 for the Switch I had basically abandoned all hope of it being a game I’d like. But for some reason, I still decided to give Monolithsoft one last shot. And I’m glad I did! While not quite as cohesive and instantly-endearing as the original, they definitely righted the ship. There’s a bunch of weird mechanics, but in the good Xenoblade 1 way where they mete them all out at an appropriate pace and explain them and they all fit together. The cast of characters is likable, the music is great, the gameplay is engaging all the way through. They managed to pull it off, and I’m back on board for a potential Xenoblade 3.

These games were also cool, I just had less words to say about them: Splatoon 2 (Nintendo Switch, 2017): Splatoon is great. Splatoon 2 is more of that. The new weapons are fun, the new maps are cool, Salmon Run is the most fun I’ve ever had with a horde mode. I played it for like 100 hours already. Not too much else to say! Play Splatoon 2! Hitman (PlayStation 4, 2016): Hitman is an amazing sandbox. Whether I was following along with the authored ways to kill my targets, doing things my own way or trying to get out of a situation that went completely south, Hitman constantly surprised me with the variety of things I could do and options I could take advantage of. And there’s so damn much content to do it all in.   DDRMAX, DDRMAX2 & Dance Dance Revolution Extreme (PlayStation 2, 2002, 2003 & 2004): This doesn’t really teeeechnically fit on this list but I would be remiss not to bring up my rekindled love affair with DDR this year. My very good friend who I am very appreciative towards at all times Geoff generously gifted me an old Cobalt Flux dance pad back in like June and I have been playing DDR again ever since and it’s still great. I can clear some songs on heavy now. Thanks Geoff. Glittermitten Grove (Steam, 2016): A very normal game about fairies, and not about shaving. Tekken 7 (PlayStation 4, 2017): Tekken 7 is the first Tekken game I’ve cared about in like a decade. I couldn’t really tell you exactly why, to be honest, but the fact of the matter is that Tekken 7 is very fun to play and I highly recommend it. Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus (PlayStation 4, 2017): I think the gameplay of this is worse than the first game, but everything else is stronger. Hopefully they fix it up and make a game that’s great all around next time. Gundam Versus (PlayStation 4, 2017): Gundam Versus is basically a team based Virtual On. I had a lot of fun with an old version of the game at various events I went to throughout the year and I had a lot of fun with this one even though I didn’t play it nearly as much as I wanted to. Clowning on people with Guntank in 1v1 is probably the hardest I laughed all year.

And that’s it! That’s 2017! It’s done! Good riddance! Thank you all again for bothering to read my video game words. If you need me, I’ll be training to deliver many extremely savage elbow drops to 2018 until it gives me what I want.

[tipco613]

New Post has been published on http://cryptonewsuniverse.com/new-crypto-regulations-in-the-us-are-the-good-times-over/

New Crypto Regulations In The US: Are The Good Times Over?

New Crypto Regulations In The US: Are The Good Times Over?

  All of us who have invested and traded in Bitcoin knew that there was no guarantee

that the good times would last forever. We’ve seen the value of the currency have ups and downs and then ups again, demonstrating its resiliency in a changing world. We’ve also seen it thrive during times when conventional markets struggle. Free of regulation and unconnected to industries and businesses that can drag a market up or down along with them, during its best months it’s been exactly what we all hoped it would be when the concept of cryptocurrency was first explained to it.

Even those who have done well out of Bitcoin would have to admit one thing if we were honest, though – we didn’t know for sure it was going to blow up like it did. Spending money on Bitcoin – especially during the last couple of years when prices have been particularly volatile – has always been akin to throwing money into a game on an online slots website and hoping for the best. Sometimes when you play online slots on websites like UKOnlineSlots.com, you get a huge return from a very small stake. Other times, perhaps more often, the company that runs the online slots website takes all of your money, and you’re left with nothing. Based on the news that’s coming out of the United States of America, the US treasury may soon be about to start playing the part of the online slots website – and they might be calling time on placing fresh bets.

There’s no way to dress up Steven Mnuchin’s start warning any other way. He hasn’t minced his words when it comes to his opinion on cryptocurrency, and several of his contemporaries and allies feel the same. Mnuchin says that stringent new regulations are coming, and they’ll likely change the way that all of us interact with crypto, and perhaps even our freedom to do so. Neel Kashkari, the President of the Federal Reserve, is on record as calling crypto ‘a garbage dumpster,’ and so we can expect the Federal Reserve to back the new regulations to the hilt. In other words, they think we’ve all had our fun at the expense of conventional banking systems for long enough, and now it’s time for the conventional financial controls and controllers to fight back.

In a strange way, we can probably blame Mark Zuckerberg and Facebook for all of this upheaval. If his company hadn’t tried and failed to get approval from US-based authorities for the doomed pseudo-cryptocurrency Libra, the whole idea of crypto probably wouldn’t have come in for such close scrutiny in the United States of America at all. Now, even the President appears to know what it is, and he doesn’t like it. Before Libra started pursuing official channels, American authorities sort-of knew what cryptocurrency was, but they turned a blind eye to it. Now they’ve been forced to lift the veil and find out what’s there, and it turns out they don’t like it one little bit. Because of that, they’re going to make it as hard and unrewarding for Americans to invest and trade in it as possible.

Right now, the price of Bitcoin hasn’t been affected too much by the announcement of forthcoming regulations. If you know much about the way Bitcoin prices move, that might not be too big a surprise. The scheduled halving event is still expected to go ahead in May, and the currency’s value is currently dependent on that far more than it is on any other external factor. Were the halving not on the radar, it’s likely that Mnuchin’s announcement would have sent Bitcoin’s cost crashing back through the floor. Depending on what’s contained within his package of rules and sanctions, it may still do so.

Ostensibly, Mnuchin’s concerns about Bitcoin (and other cryptocurrencies like it) is that they’re too anonymous, and they’re too open to use by terrorists, fraudsters, and organized criminals. Money can’t be followed from one place to another, and it’s difficult to know who has what, and where they’ve got it from. To put it another way, they hate it for a lot of the same reasons that the people who trade in it like it. Even those of us who love the concept, though, mostly acknowledge that more needs to be done to ensure that crypto doesn’t become a hiding place for illegal and immoral conduct. Some regulation activity with regard to this might even be welcomed in some quarters, but it’s hard to imagine what such a regulation would look like, or how it could possibly be enforced.

While the winds of change appear to be about to bring band news on the breeze for Americans, their impact on the rest of the world might be limited. Europe, which is generally seen as more forward-thinking when it comes to future technologies than the United States of America, already has an agreed framework for how crypto may or may not be used, and the majority of users and traders are happy to abide by it. Switzerland, in particular, is known for its pro-crypto stance, and it’s very telling that Facebook has decided to switch its Libra operation to that country recently.

It’s hard to say what the final outcome of the American change in attitude to crypto is likely to be, but it appears that we’re about to see a very important test. Will tougher regulations in the USA make it harder for everyone to trade and drag cryptocurrency prices down, or will the world of crypto carry on regardless with very little in the way of change or disruption? If the former happens, we may all have to reluctantly accept that the good times are over, and we’re going to have to make the best of what we still have. If the latter happens, though, it will be a rude awakening for the US Treasury. They’ll have had confirmation that cryptocurrency is a beast that they cannot control and can barely even influence – and that will likely scare the conservatives who set the tone of policy within the organization to death. 

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[graphicpolicy]

WARNING: MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD

“JENNIFER WALTERS has survived the Civil War…barely…and having risen from the rubble, she re-enters the world a different kind of hero. Fueled by a quiet rage, she is determined to move forward, to go on with her life, but the pain of the past and all she’s lost is always there – an undercurrent, a pulse, waiting to quicken and trigger Jen’s transformation into the one thing she doesn’t have control over…”

–From the Marvel Comics website

Ah, Hulk. I’ve been waiting for this one. Strange to say since my general attitude toward Marvel and DC comics is mostly derision. Can you blame me? One company protects a serial sexual harasser while firing women who dare speak out. The other is run by a Trump lover, making Hydra something of an all too poignant allegory for the company. I don’t care for the majority of their comics, especially their world events that operate as a way to temporarily spike sales, ultimately crashing and burning while receiving the hissing, clawing displeasure of both fans and critics. With Marvel, the recent blunder is Civil War II, a gimmicky cash grab for an enjoyable movie based on terrible source material that got delayed so many times that the books taking place after the event came out before it even concluded.

Just like the original Civil War, the sequel is guilty of character assassination, unnecessary conflict, unnecessary death, and ruining a whole bunch of comics people were enjoying. NEVER FORGIVE THEM FOR WHAT THEY DID TO CAROL DANVER! I mean, I don’t care about her, but turning her into a fascist ruined her relationship with Ms. Marvel, by far the best, most relatable Marvel character to come out since the Runaways. She was my generation’s Peter Parker, and now she’s lost both her idol and her friends as a result. Marvel ruined her. RUINED HER, I SAY!

Also, why was Tony Stark against Danver’s Minority Report shtick? I mean, this was a man who in the original series OK’d a metahuman registration program that probably made Trump cream his pants. Tony is practically a fascist himself. God, even Captain America is a Nazi now! I mean, so many of the heroes have turned into villains themselves and…

Aw, forget it. I could go all day long about everything wrong with Civil War II, but naw. I avoided that garbage and I don’t want to waste time talking about it either.

So, why in the world would I be reviewing Hulk, a comic that happened as a direct result of this nonsense? I should be angry given Bruce Banner, one of my favorite Marvel characters, died. I should be with the Marvel Zombies grabbing their axes and lead pipes smashing windows and burning cars over it. However, after reading about the series from Mariko Tamaki and Nico Leon, I had to check it out.

Oh, I know. There are those that don’t want Jennifer Walters to be angry, traumatized Hulk. They love her as She-Hulk! Big green lawyer lady that breaks the fourth wall, cracks jokes, and goes on crazed hijinks with Patsy Walker. Now, I haven’t been a lifelong fan of She-Hulk. The first thing I read starring her was the short-lived series by Charles Soule and Javier Pulido. That comic was fun! Like watching your favorite Saturday morning cartoon show while listening to your favorite indie rock band. I can see why people are so attached to happy Jen. She’s a blast.

However, I must defend this new, darker approach to her. As much as I love ladies having fun, I prefer when they’re angry monsters. In fact, it seems recently that a new breed of female lead comics that center on women being some kind of monstrosity has risen: Monstress, Insexts, She Wolf, Cry Havoc, and even the mass murderer Gertrude from I Hate Fairyland. These women are angry, broken by whatever is afflicting them, and they’re ready to let it out in a wave of unprecedented carnage. The best part about this trend is how subversive these monstrous women are. Their monstrosities might at first seem like afflictions, but they slowly develop into a form of empowerment.

Happy is good, but monstrous is better.

So, how does this route go for Jennifer Walters? Well, I’m happy to say that Hulk is a bold new take on the character that will draw readers in not with endless action, but atmospheric art, character-focused drama, and a unique horror tone tackling trauma head on.

The covers of Jeff Dekal take a unique approach in conveying monstrous rage. Instead of showing actual destruction, as was Banner Hulk’s trademark, Cover #1 shows Jen grasping the logo tightly, seemingly on the cusp of crumbling it to pieces. Yes, it’s a violent image, but not in the sense of catastrophic physical violence, but poignant emotional violence. Jen is trying to hold back her rage, resisting the urge to destroy. After all, that’s what Bruce did, a man who couldn’t control the beast within. Jen is supposed to be different, supposed to be healthy and balanced. However, given the trauma she suffered in Civil War II, Jen’s on the breaking point. This is what Dekal masterfully conveys. Also, have to give huge props for coloring Jen gray. I suspect it’s a callback to Gray Hulk, a version of the character that I sometimes prefer over the Emerald Giant.

Cover #2 also takes a unique approach to violence in showing its aftermath. The punch-cracked window, Jen’s hands clawing upward, indicates how she momentarily lost control and there was a negative consequence. She’s trying to hold it back again. Slip-ups happen, right? However, when you’re a gamma-radiant monster, slip-ups tend to end up sucking for everyone around you. The coloring of Jen is quite interesting. I don’t understand why her skin is pink (call back to the Red Hulks, maybe?), but I love how there is a creeping network of gray veins slowly covering her body. To me, this symbolizes the Hulk inside of Jen, the one she’s trying to hold back. It’s also symbolic of the negative emotions she feels: anger, depression, and helplessness.

I think it is important to note how green has more prominence than Cover #1. The glow is notably on the walls. It seems to mean Jen’s control is slipping. Again, so much about the conflict of the comic, the overriding theme of struggling with anger and trauma is masterfully conveyed on the covers. I’ve recently talked about the importance of covers conveying a story’s theme and hooking a reader at the same time. For the covers of Hulk, Jeff Dekal hits a bullseye twice.

So, how does the interior art hold up in comparison? Nico Leon’s style creates a deceptively quiet atmosphere that aches with tension. Matt Milla’s coloring adds to this with a soft color palette. In issue #1’s opening scene, Jen’s apartment has a gray tone to it. It’s a huge space, some objects built to accommodate She-Hulk’s size. However, now that Jen is in human mode, the objects are hilariously oversized. In this empty apartment, with its many objects, Jen seems tiny and isolated. It’s strange because it is both calm and tense at the same time. It has to do with how Jen’s inner monologue, full of polarizing emotion, turns the plainness of the apartment into a mask. Leon’s depiction of Jen’s mute expression further pushes this idea of plainness as a mask for turmoil. Reading the comic is the same as visiting the hospital for an urgent report. You’re sitting in the waiting room, made as nice and homely as possible, but you’re still tapping your foot because once the doctor enters, it could be life or death. This is the atmosphere of the comic. Sometimes, it’s suffocating, but always poignant.

Leon and Milla also shine in their portrayal of New York City. Instead of trying to recreate it as the grim concrete jungle it no longer is, they showcase the city in its present decorum of bright colors, modernized architecture, and streets full of yuppies in designer clothing. These are also the scenes where letterer Cory Petit gets creative. A scene in a subway has big letters crowded with the sea of bodies, demonstrating the overpopulated, noisy experience of living in New York. Just like with the apartment, Jen’s isolation is noticeable and just as emotionally complex, simultaneously calm and tumultuous.

Although the art team certainly excels in environmental atmosphere, they fall a little short with character design. They’re not bad, but not memorable either. It might have to do with the lack of detail. Leon’s faces are simplistic, most of them eerily similar. I noticed this when contrasted with the art of Dalibor Talajic in issue #2, pages 4-6. Talajic adds more details that make faces distinguishable. Also, ages are recognizable. I couldn’t nail Jen’s age with Leon, but Talajic easily places her from late 20s to 30s. Another thing that I don’t like about Leon’s characters are the eyes. When closed, they look like a cutesy style anime character. Leon might be influenced by anime and manga to a certain extent, but this element of the art clashes with the tone of the comic.

However, there are exceptions, most notably the amazing designs of metahumans. They are creative, unique, and diverse. Already, one of these metahumans, Miss Brewn, has become an important side character. In fact, just like Soule and Pulido’s run, I hope Jen ends up representing a number of crazy characters and exploring their back-stories.

The hallmark of Hulk is Mariko Tamaki’s writing. I was interested to see how a writer well known for her indie drama work like This One Summer and Skim would do with a mainstream cape comic. Can she bring the same complex, emotional drama? The answer is almost. There is still the limitation of a 20-21 page-count that prevents extensive development, not to mention some campy elements, such as a sketchy landlord character that acts like a Sopranos extra.

The rest of Tamaki’s writing pulls off an astonishing feat of taking the concept of Hulk and bringing it down to reality. Now, this isn’t impossible and has been done before as evidence by Bruce Jones’ amazing run. Here, however, it is even more so because instead of starting off with a tale of espionage, it’s one of recovery. I will admit to having been trepidatious about trauma as a central theme, not because I doubted in Tamaki’s writing abilities, but worried that funneling it through a cape comic would make depictions over the top or offensive. Thankfully, that’s not the case. There are no gross scenes of Jen crying in a shower naked while chugging bottles of whiskey, and moaning about how she can’t go on without Bruce! Oh Woe is a world so cruel and unfair! HAWTHRONE HEIGHTS RULEZ!!!

That nonsense is absent. Instead, trauma is depicted accurately. Jen gets up each day and tries to live a normal life. She goes to work, eat bagels at a café, and have a coffee while watching children ice-skating in the park. She doesn’t interact much with people. Currently, Jen feels the need to be alone. This will probably be disappointing to folks that love Jen as a snappy joker with lots of friends, but it’s relatable to some people that have experienced trauma. It is important to reach out and let people aid you, but it’s also helps to be alone sometimes. Being alone is a time to be at peace, to clear your mind and experience life instead of over-thinking it.

The few interactions Jen has with people are still supportive. There is Patsy who sends positive text messages, and Bradley, Jen’s gay secretary, who keeps her busy and provides her a packet of nuts after a bad spell of rage. There is also Miss Brewn, Jen’s client, who brings out the best part of the character: her heroism. Even if Jen’s no longer fighting along with super folks, she still dedicates herself as a lawyer, protecting clients from harm and making sure their justice. This is important again in approaching trauma from a mature, complex angle. Tamaki shows that there is room for positivity, to be able to function and be happy, even while in the midst of coping. There is even humor, both laughs and heroism balance out the darker parts of the comic.

As for trauma, the core of the story, Tamaki & Co. explores it in a unique way. Jen’s trauma is triggered when mentions of Bruce and the Hulk are made. It reminds her of the pain she has been through, of the fact her own Hulk form is now uncontrollable, something welling up and ready to burst. In these scenes, green becomes a dominant color. At their worst, Jen’s eyes turn green, the veins around them glow, and she glares and grits her teeth. The Hulk is trying to claw out, but unlike Bruce who always lost control automatically, Jen is able to force it back down. Unfortunately, this resistance clearly causes her pain. This pain symbolizes the agony of trauma itself, how it takes it toll on both the mind and body. Also, how long can Jen’s efforts last? It seems to be only a matter of time before her control slips completely.

The way these scenes are depicted is best described as atmospheric horror. The darkness, the intensity of glowing green, Jen’s contorting face of anger, are images that make the reader feel uneasy, ready to jump out of their seat as they prepare for the worst. This is how the best horror scares its audience, not through jump scares or extreme violence, but the dread of anticipation. It’s the feeling of walking alone in a street at night and there are either footsteps or strange noises trailing behind. You keep walking. You don’t dare turn around out of fear that it will be the moment the stalker strikes, yet at the same time its agonizing not knowing who or what it is. The creative team nails this type of horror down, with the added emotional resonance of knowing these scenes symbolize Jen’s trauma. It agonizes the reader into caring for Jen, if that makes sense. They know how much pain she is, and now want to see her persevere and survive. It’s similar to the final girl trope from slasher films.

The comic manages to balance out both the light and dark parts of Jen’s story. Seeing her both in pain and triumphant when the time comes is a satisfying emotional wheel for those that like protagonists to go through a personal trial before getting a happy ending. Sometimes, it can feel a little over the top, but never exploitative. Best of all, the story is told without the overuse of action that’s prevalent in modern superhero comics. Each issue unfolds like the chapter of a book, focusing on character development and dialogue. This approach reminds me of the masterful Vision series by Tom King and Gabriel Hernandez Walta. Both series read more like literary horror than superhero adventure. This style is not for everyone, and there will still be people that don’t enjoy this type of story, especially those who don’t want it happening to Jen. However, I have to take a stand and say it is executed expertly. Tamaki, Leon, and everyone else involved obviously understand people’s concerns for the character, and from what I have seen so far are giving her the respect she deserves.

One last thing I want to comment on is both the title of the series and that of the current story arc. It’s called “Deconstruction.” Why? My theory based on the content is that this arc, and the series as a whole, is attempting to deconstruct the character. Hulk, in relation to Bruce Banner, has always been associated with pain, destruction, and mental illness. His death can be seen as the finality of those negative attributes. It is something seen in stories time and time again. The monster, symbolic of the things that bother humanity, must die. Jen was different. Yes, she started off just as savage, but eventually attained control of her other self, even going so far as live daily as She-Hulk. That gift was taken away from her with the death of Bruce, and now her Hulk form afflicts her just as much as it did him.

Perhaps this is necessary. Now that Hulk is dead, and Jen claims the name, it’s almost saying that she has to be stuck with the original meaning of the name, not empowerment but destruction. It should be noted how the events that caused the scenario were mandated by a mostly male creative team. So, while it is easy to give praise for titling the series Hulk instead of She-Hulk to erase gender labels, it could also be said that the old male meaning behind Hulk is now inflicted upon a woman. As I mentioned before, monsters are often symbolic of everything that is wrong with the world, and anyone or anything labeled as such tends to be set up for elimination. After all, society can’t have an ugly manifestation of its dark side stalking about.

However, there is an opportunity for the monstrosity to become a form of empowerment. In the female monster titles I mentioned, monstrous women are immediately put in the box of wrong and afflicted by (mostly male) society’s perceptions of monsters. Jen is similarly afflicted, dealing with her cousin’s legacy, one of contempt from the world at large. But she’s not letting this legacy hold her down. Jen is still being Jen. Furthermore, the series would be smart in showing a transition of Jen reclaiming control of her hulk form and, on a larger scale, breaking down the old concept of Hulk and reconstructing it as something positive. Being a monster can become empowering rather than afflicting.

Only two issues in, Hulk is full of potential. If it lasts long enough and the creative team grows Jen in the right path, it may become an engaging tale of trauma, monstrosity, and reclaiming one’s identity. With atmospheric art, an emotionally complex story, and unique horror tone, I would recommend this title to anyone that loves the character. She might not be the She-Hulk of old, but she is no less fun to read.

Story: Mariko Tamaki Art: Nico Leon, Matt Milla, Cory Petit, Dalibor Talajic Story: 9.5 Art: 8.5 Overall: 9 Recommendation: Buy

Make Me Angry: Hulk #1-2 Review #comics #marvel #hulk WARNING: MINOR SPOILERS AHEAD “JENNIFER WALTERS has survived the Civil War…barely…and having risen from the rubble, she re-enters the world a different kind of hero.

[animalhead]

Top 10 Albums/Songs of 2018

Top 10 Albums of 2018

10. Death Grips - Year Of The Snitch - All I could think about on my first listen of this album was Michael Jackson. It's pure theater, pure performance. Multi-layered and captivating. Metal af.

9. Olafur Arnulds - re:member - For the past couple years I've managed to slip a random soundscape/classical album into my list which I'm sure everyone greatly appreciates. Well, this year is no exception. I'll explain myself again - I live in a noisy-ass, toddler-and-baby world and my brain needs some quiet every now and again. I won't pretend to know the state of modern classical music, or what makes a classical album important today, etc. I'll just say that listening to this album makes me feel good. Olafur Arnulds never fails to give me my space.

8. Ashley Monroe - Sparrow - Maybe the saddest album of the year thematically. I don't know if I've heard a more powerful blend of poetry, soul, and country music. Sparrow feels like a crossover, but a crossover from what to what? Where did she come from? It's like Bill Withers and Carole King secretly raised a kid in Nashville. "Hands on You" is the sexiest jam of the year.

7. John Prine - The Tree of Forgiveness - I think the last time I put John Prine on my Top 10 list, I said that I had a feeling it would be his last album. Thank god I was wrong. I can't remember where I heard this, but someone said that the genius of Prine is that he infuses the absolutely domestic with sacred meaning. It's so true: who else can sing about putting stuff on layaway and taking the garbage out and somehow make it seem like the meaning of love and life? And The Tree of Forgiveness proves that he hasn't lost a single step. Just listen to "Egg & Daughter Nite, Lincoln Nebraska 1967" and then "Summer's End". Laugh, cry, repeat. I will forever love John Prine.

6. Sarah Louise - Deeper Woods - Joanna Newsom has been on hiatus and I've been getting desperate for the sort of ethereal, naturalist root music that she does so well. Luckily I found Sarah Louise, who has a Grace Slick-meets-Joan Baez-meets-Nico thing going on. I'll always be a sucker for stripped down spooky Robert Frost folk, and this one covers all the bases. Haunting. 

5. Remember Sports - Slow Buzz - I actually really liked this album so thanks TZ for recommending it; I wish I had more time with it prior to now.  Lyrically it is excellent - it's unique, vulnerable, smart, and relatable all at the same time. The vocals have that indie Pinegrove guts-exposure that makes it so believable. I would absolutely go to a show and stand in the back in my Violent Femmes t-shirt and nod along unassumingly. That said though, I can't get it out of my head that there is something so heartbreaking about this album - it's world-weary and it dares to ask the universe to give back the prom queen angst and Nick-and-Nora breakup 'sad's that were par for the course before weekly school shootings and nazis part deux. I respect it for that.

4. Mitski - Be the Cowboy - Such great instrumental breakdowns, such strange melodies, such a well-crafted album from start to finish. The way Mitski blends synth with acoustics with electric strings is perfect. She manages to be obscure and 'out there' while simultaneously being so open and accessible; no easy feat.

3. Hop Along - Bark Your Head Off, Dog - Hop Along was a breath of fresh air this year and I think I listened to BYHOD the most of any album. It's light and airy, but cutting and witty also. It plays like a 90s femme alt-rock collection and it's glued together with poignant lyrics. The vocals of Francis Quinlan are fantastic, whose improvised repetition and early indie style rings with the urgency of someone who knows something big is going to happen but can't get anyone to pay attention.

2. Saba - CARE FOR ME - Remember a little album called Good Kid, M.A.A.D City? CFM is the Chicago version. Saba takes you to the honest extremes of his emotion, pulling out raw despair and depression at times and love and hope at other times. No other album this year had me hanging on every word, rooting for the artist throughout the entire track list. To say the album feels like a movie seems to cheapen it, though it has the dramatic peaks and valleys of a blockbuster. No, it's a memoir. Saba treats the listener like a friend, venting and raging on "LIFE", laughing and dreaming on "SMILE", utterly disassembling the music industry on "GREY", and storytelling like a master on "PROM / KING". Listen to this again and then go amend your lists. Oh yeah, Chance is on it.  

1. Snail Mail - Lush - I have a hard time putting my finger on exactly why I loved this album so much this year. Maybe it's the vocals - smooth and swaying, sort of pissed off, sort of disappointed. Maybe it's the space - tracks are minimalist, echoed, and beautifully bare. I tend to lean toward the personality of it all. It feels like Lindsey Jordan is breaking free of something, and that gives the whole album an optimistic, eyes-on-the-horizon vibe that is intoxicating. Top notch album that defined the year for me.

Worst Album of 2018

Decemberists - I'll Be Your Girl - I used to get pumped when a new Decemberists album came out - their stuff was interesting, smart, nerd fuel. These days when they release an album, I only find myself thinking 'ugh just please don't be complete shit'. And this album wasn't exactly that, but it wasn't exactly anything. It's just the last of the crinkled post-its on the bottom of Colin Meloy's weird poem trashcan. There's no real heart or message anywhere. Their last good album was The King is Dead (and it was a really good album), but the band itself is increasingly feeling like Meloy's jackoff mirror. I'm pretty sure he's holding the rest of the band captive in his grapevine garland-draped, all-too-rustic cellar.

Top 10 Songs (that weren't on my Top 10 Albums) of 2018

10. Parquet Courts - "Total Football"  -  "...and FUCK TOM BRADY!"

9. Metric - "Dressed to Suppress"  -  Great track on a really fun album.

8. Natalie Prass - "Short Court Style"  -  Now That's What I Call Music 1,563.

7. Old Crow Medicine Show - "Look Away"  -  OCMS still finding beauty in the rust of the south.  

6. Kanye West - "Ghost Town"  -  Most heartfelt track on a decent, but maybe a little lazy (?) album.

5. Unknown Mortal Orchestra - "American Guilt"  - Making Americans examine our own social presence.

4. Israel Nash - "Rolling On"  -  Big full-bodied sound wall.

3. Courtney Barnett - "Need A Little Time"  -  CB gettin' deep.

2. Leon Bridges - "Beyond"  -  Pure, wonderful love song.

1. Dawes - "Crack The Case"  -  Beautiful. One of the best current singer/songwriters.

Top 5 Players from MTV's The Challenge (so sue me)

5. Sylvia - I don't know why I like Sylvia so much. She headbutted that drunken, cig-smoking mom, Marie. She's just a little firecracker. A fiesty underdog with a lot of heart.

4. Shane - Shane is a self-titled bitch. He's the snakiest, slimiest player there is. He actually threw an entire challenge so that a certain player on his team would be voted out.

3. Wes - Arguably the arch-nemesis of Bananas before Devin came along. Always hatching schemes that are way too complicated and get him thrown out.

2. Devin - The way this dude fucks with Johnny Bananas is hilarious. Someone had to come in and usher out the old heads - Devin is the man for the job.

1. Cara Maria - She's a force and completely independent. She was the first woman to ever win The Challenge solo. She can be a bit cringey sometimes, but she's a beast.