you should've seen this coming.
you'd chalk it up to those ancient Facebook text posts for instilling the idea in your subconscious and for assuring you it'll be fine but then again, you should've known better with all the media you've consumed featuring the best friends to lovers trope.
the trope you're currently living out in the real world.
well, technically. just the subcomponent of one of the best friends falling for the other.
(alexa, play accidentally in love by counting crows)
but, yeah. those teenage girls behind the #GirlFacts Facebook text posts weren't lying. a girl and a guy can become best friends without getting romantically involved with each other. it's just that they didn't really account for the factors social psychologists have since identified to predict attraction.
familiarity? yep.
physical attractiveness? duh.
similarity? you'd say so.
reciprocity? you'd like to think your (now) 3-year (best) friendship hasn't been one-sided.
and fuck akaashi keiji for having all four.
the shrill ring of your doorbell echoes throughout your apartment, ripping you out of your stupor. fuck.
hurriedly putting some sweatpants on, you dash towards your door, mentally cussing out your best friend and his characteristic punctuality. of course, in any given day, you'd appreciate this about him.
not today.
having the groundbreaking revelation that you're in love with your best friend dawn on you during finals week is one thing. realizing that earth-shattering fact five minutes before keiji's scheduled to arrive for your regular study session is another. tip toeing on your bare feet, you squint through the peephole, heart hammering at the sight of your best friend like he hasn't been dropping by to hang out every week in the last two years.
"y/n? you there?"
you finally will yourself to swing the door open, flashing him an apologetic smile, "sorry. just had to quickly put on some pants."
he chuckles, letting himself in but not without first wiggling the goodies he's carrying, the ones he promised to pick up from your favorite coffee shop on the way.
"i know it's been a bit humid lately, but you have to have some pants on 24/7, y/n. in case of emergencies."
did he have to be so fucking doting? jesus.
you plop down on the living room floor across him, trying to look like you're not having a mental breakdown from the recent realization concerning your best friend.
you probably look constipated right now.
helping him out with setting up the food and study materials on the coffee table, you scrunch your nose in belated disagreement, "well, i haven't had to run across the lobby with just my underwear on during a fire or earthquake. and it's been 2 years of living in this building. i think i'm good, thanks."
keiji only shakes his head in defeat, albeit donning that familiar fond look on his face, which never failed to give you a rush whenever you managed to pull it from him.
could that've served as a sign? you just assumed everyone in keiji's life felt that way. besides, having a stoic, composed person "break" out of character is always exciting in its own right, regardless of who the person in question is.
but if it was, indeed, a sign, then congratulations! you're still in the running to be the world's greatest airhead.
you stifle your nth yawn of the night, much to your chagrin. it hasn't been that long since you started studying (you caught up with each other's lives while snacking for the first hour) yet you already feel drained.
keiji snorts, "already?"
you lightly smack his shoulder in retaliation, "no one shames me for my wack energy levels in my household."
although he can probably power through a few more pages of his reading, keiji locks his iPad in (what you think is) an act of solidarity. you raise your eyebrow at him.
he only shrugs, "a little break won't hurt."
you grin in delight, and keiji couldn't help but mirror it back to you.
the "little" break has been anything but, and it's currently hurting both of your chances of getting an A on your major finals.
you nudge keiji with your shoulder, who's sprawled comfortably beside you on the couch, mindlessly scrolling through his phone. admittedly, the proximity is getting to you, but you suppress the nervousness as best as you can. the last thing you need is for things to get awkward between the two of you.
"pst," you start, "we've been lounging here for two hours now."
he grunts in acknowledgment but doesn't move to do anything in response to your statement.
well, then. if the more responsible one is being an enabler, who are you to complain, right?
but just as you were about to go back to your own doom scrolling, keiji pokes your shoulder.
you briefly glance at him, quickly looking back at your phone. now you can't even sustain eye contact anymore? great.
you, at the very least, still hum in acknowledgment, "hm?"
"i want to know what you think about this."
he tilts his phone towards you, and you recoil a bit from the brightness.
(you always told him to turn it down lest he damage his eyes even further. guess you aren't the only stubborn one between the two of you)
"oops," he quickly turns it back to himself, lowering it to the setting he usually sees your phone be at, "sorry 'bout that."
you just shake your head in amusement, instead choosing to zero in on what he's trying to show you. immediately, you recognize it as the short manga he's been working on in the last 2 weeks, only now it's completely polished and colored in. and looking like the real deal.
"damn!" you excitedly take the phone from his hands, bringing it closer to your eyes, "this looks so good, keiji!"
he only chuckles shyly, though you can tell he's pretty flattered, "you really think so?"
"of course! i can definitely picture this being displayed at our local bookstore. it's that good."
you beam at him as he gently takes his phone from you. keiji has never been good at taking compliments; even as his best friend, you're still doing trial and error when it comes to giving him the right amount validation.
he's looking down at his phone, quiet, and you can't help but feel like (maybe) you overdid it.
"i'm serious, keiji. i'm not just saying all this because i'm your best friend."
he finally looks up at you with a grateful smile on his face, "i know."
your conversation falls into a lull. a few minutes of comfortable silence passes before he speaks up again.
"it's funny that you said that, actually."
"how so?"
he sits upright, turning to face you, and you follow suit. you mentally chide yourself for feeling antsy all over again. this whole being in love thing is exhausting. you're not even sure if it's real or if you're just imagining it.
(professional self-gaslighters, amirite?)
he clears his throat, "if i really think about it, then yeah. maybe as my best friend, my agreeable and nice best friend," he eyes you teasingly, "your inputs shouldn't really have that much weight for me."
you get what he's trying to say, but you can't pass up the opportunity to mess with him, "ouch, but go on."
"no! i didn't mean it like—"
you cackle over his immediate, satisfactory reaction, "i know! go on."
he huffs lightly, an imperceptible (to the untrained eye) pout evident on his face. "i was just gonna say that even though I know your opinion shouldn't really count, just like my mom's, which like yours—always seems to be positive, by the way, i can't help but feel ecstatic when I hear them."
you can't get anything out from the shock; thankfully, he continues, "basically, i just wanted to tell you that, as silly as it may sound and for me to be even doing this," he chuckles a bit self-consciously, "i hold what you say in highest regard."
"possibly even higher than mom's or bokuto's," he adds quickly, rubbing the back of his neck, "though now i'm being redundant 'cause i already said highest.."
you can only laugh at keiji's rambling, but also because he just rendered you speechless, unable to muster anything in response to that sweet and innocent confession.
he seems to loosen up at the sight of you receiving his message well, eventually chuckling alongside with you.
once the laughter died down and the heavy beating of your heart became manageable, you force yourself to look at keiji, who is still seeming a bit sheepish from his recent stint of vulnerability.
"thank you, keiji," you say as softly as you can, "i can say the same thing about you."
he visibly brightens up at that, and you can't help the surge of affection from washing over you despite your efforts to keep them at bay.
"really?"
"really," you playfully punch his chest, "so you better be honest with me!"
you intended to lighten up the atmosphere with that last sentence, but instead, keiji appears as if he's been reminded of something that sits heavily in his mind (as everything does for your best friend, but this one seems like an especially worse case)
"actually, y/n," he starts, a faint blush appearing high on his cheeks, "i have something i've been meaning to tell you."
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