#glassblower with hiccups

[pratchettquotes]

The lifetimers of most people were the classic shape that Death thought was right and proper for the task. They appeared to be large eggtimers, although, since the sands they measured were the living seconds of someone's life, all the eggs were in one basket.

Rincewind's hourglass looked like something created by a glassblower who'd had the hiccups in a time machine. According to the amount of actual sand it contained--and Death was pretty good at making this kind of estimate--he should have died long ago. But strange curves and bends and extrusions of glass had developed over the years, and quite often the sand was flowing backwards, or diagonally. Clearly, Rincewind had been hit by so much magic, had been thrust reluctantly through time and space so often that he'd nearly bumped into himself coming the other way, that the precise end of his life was now as hard to find as the starting point on a roll of really sticky transparent tape.

Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent

[stupidphototricks]

I still have a lot of leftover favorite quotes from Feet of Clay, I hope nobody minds.

People look down on stuff like geography and meteorology, not only because they're standing on one and being soaked by the other. They don't quite look like real science. But geography is only physics slowed down and with a few trees stuck on it, and meteorology is full of excitingly fashionable chaos and complexity. And summer isn't a time. It's a place as well. Summer is a moving creature and likes to go south for the winter. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

Just take a minute with this one. Geography is only physics slowed down and with a few trees stuck on it. Is it profound, or is it complete nonsense? I can't tell! Curse you Sir Terry (affectionate)

Constable Visit[-The-Infidel-With-Explanatory-Pamphlets] spent his days in company with his co-religionist Smite-The-Unbeliever-With-Cunning-Arguments, ringing doorbells and causing people to hide behind the furniture everywhere in the city. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(These names are genius)

"Guild member?" "Not any more, sir." "Oh? How did you leave the [alchemists'] guild?" "Through the roof, sir. But I'm pretty certain I know what I did wrong." -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

"Is dere any trouble?" he said. The crowd backed away. "None at all, officer," said Mr. Raddley. "You, er, just loomed suddenly, that's all..." "Dis is correct," said Detritus. "I am a loomer. It often happen suddenly. So dere's no trouble, den?" "No trouble whatsoever, officer." -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

The tincture of night began to suffuse the soup of the afternoon. Lord Vetinari considered the sentence and found it good. He liked "tincture" particularly. Tincture. Tincture. It was a distinguished word, and pleasantly countered the flatness of "soup." -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(An oddly Douglas Adams-esque digression. It goes on, too)

The three thieves looked around. As their eyes grew accustomed to the gloom, they received a general impression of armorality, with strong overtones of helmetness. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(mmm adjectivized nouns, my favorite)

She scrounged what she could from the guild, but a real alchemical laboratory should be full of the kind of glassware that looked as if it were produced during the Guild of Glassblowers All-Comers Hiccuping Contest. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

Ankh-Morpork, alone of all the cities of the plains, had opened its gates to dwarfs and trolls (alloys are stronger, as Vetinari had said). It had worked. They made things. Often they made trouble, but mostly they made wealth. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

There were no public health laws in Ankh-Morpork. It would be like installing smoke detectors in Hell. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

"D*mn!" said Carrot, a difficult linguistic feat. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(I was wrong about Mort, it wasn’t the last time for that joke)

"The man has actually got charisn'tma." "Your meaning?" "I mean he's so dreadful he fascinates people." -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

He felt more alive than he had for days. The recent excitement still tingled in his veins, kicking his brain into life. It was the sparkle you got with exhaustion, he knew. You were so bone-weary that a shot of adrenaline hit you like a falling troll. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

I love this because you're just reading along, it all makes sense, and then a troll drops unexpectedly into the sentence, illustrating the simile in a very meta sort of way.

Cows, in Sergeant Colon's book, should go "moo." Every child knew that. They shouldn't go "mur-r-r-r-r-m!" like some kind of undersea monster and spray you with spit. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

"Hello, hello, hello, what's all this, then?" said Carrot. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(Carrot being a human police officer, iykyk)

Rogers the bulls were angry and bewildered, which counts as the basic state of mind for a full-grown bulls. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

Just as a point of interest, Rogers is one of only two literary characters I can think of that use plural pronouns, the other one being Proginoskes the cherubim from A Wind in the Door by Madeline L'Engle.

Angua couldn't make out any words but many dwarf cries didn't bother with words. They went straight for emotions in sonic form. -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

"It's the most menacing dwarf battle-cry there is! Once it's been shouted someone has to be killed!" "What's it mean?" "Today Is A Good Day For Someone Else To Die!" -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(Dwarfs are more pragmatic than Klingons)

"Commander Vimes said someone has to speak for the people with no voices!" -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(Vimes would have gotten along with Granny Aching, I think)

"We can rebuild him," said Carrot hoarsely. "We have the pottery." -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

"Dis is police brutality..." Igneous muttered. "No, dis is just police shoutin'!" yelled Detritus. "You want to try for brutality it OK wit' me!" -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(Detritus has really gotten the knack of policing by now. And by the way he does nothing out of line here, or I think ever)

"That's blasphemy," said the vampire. He gasped as Vimes shot him a glance like sunlight. "That's what people say when the voiceless speak." -- Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

[nateascendingskies]

The Personal Experiences of Pixar and Elemental

Leaving a showing of the crew at Pixar and director Peter Sohn's latest film, Elemental, I was struck by how personal and certifiably unique the film was - no, not necessarily because of its story or even its characters (though the latter felt like a great inverse and even echo of the similar Zootopia), but because of how its themes of the immigrant experience, the duties and expectations of familial traditions, and even the feeling of multicultural love were conveyed or explored.

Much like how I have felt and seen myself in classic Disney and DreamWorks characters like Nick Wilde, WALL-E, and Hiccup Haddock, Ember and Wade spoke to me in ways I wasn't necessarily expecting or even considering walking into the theater some 2 hours earlier.

Like the literal flaming young woman that is Ember, I find myself in an interesting position in my life. While I have not necessarily found myself in the burden of following in family footsteps, I related very much to the idea of having to control one's temper in stressful situations. In the retail environment I have found myself in, I too have been overwhelmed by the constant hustle, bustle and flow of customers - all with their own wacky, weird and wild requests I probably wouldn't have even considered had I not stepped foot in a Home Depot for 8 hours every day. Oftentimes, I need a softer, creative, and often free-spirited side to awaken and comfort me when things get rough or tough sometimes. And, of course, that's where someone like a Wade comes in.

Like Wade, I do find myself easily crying at the most emotional of things - I do happily and readily admit. Yet, like the big ol' blob of water he is, I also find myself finding some clever solutions to problems I never once considered encountering. In addition, I do have a family and a creative community around me who have gone their own wacky and unusual ways, pursuing their own computer science or radiological techniques while I still try to find my own way around the world - living the dream as a writer for a film or motorsport publication or an archivist for a studio like Pixar, perhaps (funny, ain't it?).

Even then, it wasn't just the personal connections that I found in myself that drew me in. For the longest time, I had been longing for a Pixar film that felt like a true back to basics approach - the product of one voice guiding a similar creative team of thousands. Much like 2021's Luca, this was it - but on a big screen scale I didn't even think I wanted to see again. It felt refreshingly simple, pared back, even - which let the visuals carry the story even more than usual.

I didn't need any dialogue about butterflies, car windshields, code violations, blunt yet hard hitting racial allegories, games about making others cry, or depressed clouds trying to play visually trippy basketball equivalents (trust me, it all makes sense when you see the film) to keep me invested - all it took was a kaleidoscopic trip through a flooded old train station to find a flower that could survive in water and fire, some literal crowd waves at a sports stadium, and a literal familial flame to guide me through this weird world of living elements that Sohn and his team had created, showing more than saying what he had seen as a member of an immigrant family and perhaps even as a smitten romantic himself. Besides, as someone who spent a year in Oregon watching some of the best glassblowers in the world practice their craft, I couldn't help but smile watching that all come into play as a gift that Ember realized she had.

If anything, the flaws and traditional story beats the film had only served to draw attention more to what made it work - as a romantic comedy about literal opposites attracting, an unexpected tonal blender of comedy, drama and romance, and as a beautiful reflection of never really giving up on the dreams you discover and find as your life changes. I mean, if you told me I'd find a home at a Home Depot as a job I loved 5 or 10 years ago, I'd call you nuts! If you told me I'd come out of a film as mismarketed as Elemental listening to its beautiful score from Thomas Newman and admiring it mere hours after seeing it in a way that even Across the Spider-Verse couldn't match, I'd call you insane! And, perhaps most importantly of all, if you told me that I'd have a renewed hope, admiration and appreciation for the team at Pixar after how critical I was about their position in my last post - well, then you'd probably call me an unbelievable hypocrite with something stuck in my head. But that's just the way things work - and I couldn't be any happier to be wrong.

Plus, it made me more determined than ever to chase my own animated dreams. Now, if you don't mind, I'm gonna see what I should doodle next…

[firstofficerrose]

Terry Pratchett’s narration and the way he sets a scene is just astonishing to me.

“Details began to distil out of the blur. It was a long, low room, one end of which was entirely occupied by an enormous fireplace. A bench all down one wall contained a selection of glassware apparently created by a drunken glassblower with hiccups, and inside its byzantine coils colored liquids seethed and bubbled. A skeleton hung from a hook in a relaxed fashion. On a perch beside it, someone had nailed a stuffed bird. Whatever sins it had committed in life, it hadn’t deserved what the taxidermist had done to it.“

What an excellent passage.

Beginning with the details distilling out of the blur (yes, I know it’s misspelled, but that’s how it is in the printing of the book I have), which both communicates Rincewind slowly getting his wits about him enough to see clearly, and works well with the alchemical equipment that comes up next.

The description of the glassware is delightful, it’s silly in keeping with the tone of Discworld, and it calls to mind exactly the kind of convoluted lab equipment a mad scientist (well, demonologist) ought to have.

I also really like the skeleton being described as relaxed. How unexpected and wonderful.

The stuffed bird being described as undeserving of the taxidermist’s clumsiness despite any crimes is great. I love the thought of the bird as a sinner, it makes me think of this:

[Image ID: A yellow fluffy worm with tiny googly eyes. The speech bubble next to the worm says “I’m free!” The image says “Worm OFF the string. what sins will he commit?”]

And the passage just has a great, slightly bouncy feel to it, which I think is partly attributable to humor, and partly to the alliteration you get in the prose. It doesn’t quite read as poetry, but there’s some great poetic devices being used here.

[iconuk01]

A real alchemical laboratory should be full of the kind of glassware that looked as if it were produced during the Guild of Glassblowers All-Comers Hiccuping Contest.

Sir Terry Pratchett “Feet of Clay”

[alynnl]

The Shape of Lifetimers

“Mort” and other books featuring Death’s domain talk about the lifetimers, or the hourglasses that show how much time mortals have to live. Each hourglass has its own unique shape. Based on characters’ traits and personalities, I’ve come up with a few ideas for what details might be on each lifetimer.

If you want to add your own headcanons about the hourglasses that weren’t described here, feel free!

Susan Sto Helit: Hers looks normal at a glance. It has ordinary wooden bases with white sand. But look closer, and one will see the Omega symbol between her first and last name, and a small scythe attached on the side. Her sand drained typically as any average human’s before the events of Soul Music, but as time went on and she used her inherited powers, she became a little less human and so did her flow of sand. Her name is engraved at the bottom in a silver Gothic script.

Samuel Vimes: His hourglass has a plain oak wood base and a tiny copper Commander’s badge next to his name. His sands have turned gray due to all the cigars he’s smoked. Before he met Sybil, Vimes’s hourglass was draining much faster, but it seems to have slowed down considerably. His lifetimer is beginning to take on an unusual warped shape due to Death’s many near-Vimes experiences. Sam Vimes’s name is engraved on the bottom in a simple script, etched in copper like his badge.

Rincewind: His hourglass is described in the books as a creation a glassblower might have made with hiccups. It’s too odd to comprehend since the Gods are always toying with his fate. On the top base it says “wizzard,” just like his hat. There are tiny stars etched into the glass, and at times they glitter. Over time, stamps from the places he’s been have appeared over his lifetimer. About the only feature left from its original shape is Rincewind’s name, which has been etched in golden Old Morporkian (1), a standard font for wizards.

Twoflower: His hourglass has a red base, and golden sands. The actual glass and flow of sand has been distorted and resembles a curvy modern art piece, due to the many times he cheated death by simply being optimistic enough. Various stickers are on the top and bottom bases, each one a place he went during his travels. An engraving of an Agatean butterfly nests on a chrysanthemum at the end of his name, which is written entirely in his native pictograms.

Moist von Lipwig: Lipwig’s hourglass has a golden base, clear glass and gold colored sand. There are the likenesses of tiny glass rings, stamps, and envelopes carved into his glass. Death knew the end of Albert Spangler was not the end of Moist, because there was quite a lot of sand left for him. The sands in Moist’s lifetimer fall in a corkscrew pattern rather than falling straight. His name is engraved in New Tsortian (2).

Havelock Vetinari: His hourglass is covered in his favorite color. There is black tinted glass, a black base and black sands, which have a peculiar tendency to slow down at times. If one looks closely, they can find his family motto engraved on the back, just behind his name, all in a plain, yet menacing font he tends to use for memos. The changing nature of his sands makes it difficult to predict when he will reach his end.

Sybil Ramkin: Since she is of noble birth, the base of her hourglass is silver, and sands are pure white. There are dragon motifs carved into the glass. Her name is engraved into the bottom base in neat, curly letters. On either side are  small carvings of dragon wings. Time passes for her in a steady, easy flow, but it’s suggested that she’ll never be too far behind Sir Samuel.

Adora Belle Dearheart: The base of her hourglass is gray, and her actual sands are an even darker gray. It seems drab at first, until one looks closer to find the runes used as chem for some of the Golems in her trust, and a line of Clacks code that reads “GNU John Dearheart.” Her name is engraved in a simple sans serif script, with a stiletto heel next to the very end.

Carrot Ironfoundersson: He has quite an impressive hourglass, one fit for the rumored true heir to the Ankh Morpork throne. There’s a mahogany base, clear glass, and pure white sand. Carrot’s name is engraved in gold cursive lettering, and next to it is a very polished, definitely copper mini-Captain’s badge from the City Watch. As part of the generation of new Disc heroes, his sands are not expected to run out any time soon.

Ponder Stibbons: For a wizard’s lifetimer, it is remarkably less shiny than the others, with significantly less gold stars and Ankh stones. The base is green, the same color as Ponder’s robe, and the sands are a very light tan found at beaches everywhere. The lettering of his name is still in Old Morporkian but in black, and written much more precise than other wizards. On the back of the hourglass are the words “Rocket Wizard” in the same script. There are square roots etched into the glass. Various gears adorn the top and bottom bases.

Mustrum Ridcully: His hourglass appears to be larger than others, due to his larger than life personality. The base is solid oak, just like his staff, and there is a mini crossbow attached to the right side. Various sigils are carved into the wood and glassware, along with twinkling golden stars along the base. His name is written in the traditional wizard’s font, entirely in capital letters. The flow of the sparkling red sand in his hourglass goes almost unnaturally straight due to his direct nature, but it does not appear to be going quickly, suggesting he will have the longest life of any Archchancellor in history.

Old English

Times New Roman

[discworldtour]

Death had taken to keeping Rincewind’s lifetimer on a special shelf in his study, in much the way that a zoologist would want to keep an eye on a particularly intriguing specimen. The lifetimers of most people were the classic shape that Death thought was right and proper for the task. They appeared to be large eggtimers, although since the sands they measured were the living seconds of someone’s life, all the eggs were in one basket. Rincewind’s hourglass looked like something created by a glassblower who’d had the hiccups in a time machine. According to the amount of actual sand it contained -- and Death was pretty good at making this kind of estimate -- he should have died long ago. But strange curves and bends and extrusions of glass had developed over the years, and quite often the sand was flowing backwards, or diagonally. Clearly, Rincewind had been hit by so much magic, had been thrust reluctantly through time and space so often that he’d nearly bumped into himself coming the other way, that the precise end of his life was now as hard to find as the starting point on a roll of really sticky transparent tape.

-- on Rincewind’s lifetimer | Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent

[greeniebear1]

No matter what life throws, I love this man more than I have ever loved anyone. I have become more ambitious and ultimately happy with the direction of my life, despite hiccups (we all have them). I will always work and continue working on myself and I feel that's what life is partially about. Have a great Wednesday everyone! #beyourself #behappy #livelife #bepositive #havesomeonebyyourside #michigan #glassblower #organik #love #imnotdoneyet #compatibility #soulmates #truelove