#go team bloom whooo!!

[grigori77]

Critical Role, Campaign 3 Episode 62

Meemees! Hmmmm ... hotdog on my head? What? Pineapple? Ummmmm ... oh, I get it now, Sam is thoroughly fucking with Matt ... and now the master plan is revealed! Yeah ...

Liam getting tongue-tied about Essek ... yup boy's totally channeling Caleb without even meaning to ... XD

So we're short some folks, but all the relevant players are here, so it really has no actual bearing. So ...

Oh yeah, Wind Cougar. This couldn't possibly be used for unnecessarily idiotic humour, could it?

They're all walking. Yeah ...

Oh, here we go, ALREADY with the cougar jokes ... XD

What's in the Hole? Hmmmm ...

Yeah, don't look like horses is gonna happen. So they're just hoofing it ... though is gonna take a while ...

Do not enable the Murder Pixie ...

Yeah, like what even IS going on either Bor'Dor? Oh, they're getting him to PRACTICE now? Okay ... SHOOTING TREES?!!! Seriously? This can't possibly go well ...

Oh yeah, Laudna actually IS the right person to mentor him, actually. Which is as worrying as you'd expect ...

"Aaron Sorkin Walk & Talk" XD

Good roll? Smooth day of travelling, then.

Laudna's bodily functions are revealed and it's as nauseating as we thought it would be ...

Mother and Pate ... oh boy ... meanwhile Prism buttering Dynios up is adorably hilarious. :3 And the team-up ... oh boy 2 ...

Not a very communicative cougar, clearly.

Tolerable role becomes STRONG roll snd Bor'Dor avoids poisoning half the party with toxic berries ... meanwhile Deni$e essentially mercy kills a senile rabbit for dinner ... LOL

"Talk to rocks?" Okay ... Ashton tries meditation under Orym's guidance. This should be fun ... ah ... waffles? Yup ... what I expected, really. Ah, so ... man-to man heart-to-heart ... yup ...

Ah, massage ...

Fruit roll-ups? Awwwwww ...

Oooh, non-lethal booby-traps? Hmmmm ... and now Prism's giving Bor'Dor's crossbow a Draconic upgrade. Okay ... how lethal has she just made it? Oh, here we go ...

Dragon's Breath? Oh hell ... and now Deni$e has no painted eyebrows any more ... not ti mention the crossbow is now ON FIRE!!! Oof ... yeah, maybe not try THAT again ...

"Book smarts and ... sheep smarts." XD

I'm sorry ... Laudna has an OLD SPINE?!!! What fresh hell is THIS potential nightmare fuel? Oh dear gods what HAVE THEY made? Really?

Bor'Dor trying to do a Firebolt ... oh fuck ... "That's a big FOUR, baby!" Yeesh ... oh, 12? Okay then ... yeah, not bad, actually ... oh, he's trying MORE?!!! Whooo ... oh, and he's doing something to ASHTON?!!! A Second Level Calm Emotions? Hmmmm ... oh wow, that actually WORKED?!!! Blimey ... "mage whippets"? Snort ... and another one on EVERYBODY ELSE ... wow ... now they're all stoned as hell and it's hilarious ... LOL

And now Bor'Dor is cuddling up with the cougar ... while Deni$e traumatises another rabbit ...

Ashton has a spiritual Zen adventure in the night ... yeah ...

Amazingly, nothing happens in the night while they're all thoroughly tranked ... XD

Next morning, fresh roll ... 5? Hmmm ... okay then ... oh boy, what's THIS shit then?

If in doubt, chuck a handful of balls bearings in the crater ... yeah, it's all very Beau ...

Sending in Pate, then ... oh, and now EVERYBODY'S getting in on the act ... yeah, this is a great idea, isn't it?

There's something UNDER the plants ... oh yeah, here we go ... Wither & Bloom ... a skeleton? Or not ... what IS THIS?!!!

Merge With Stone? Ashton, what are you doing? Laudna has a rock chisel ... Matt SPECIFICALLY pointing out how well equipped she is FOR THIS makes me VERY uneasy ...

A githzerai? A WHAT?!!! An alien? Huh?

So the crater was from an IMPACT, but it's aldi sn intentional imprisonment ... hmmmm ...

Hematite? Oh, sky iron? Okay then ...

Ring of Volcanic Flesh? Ooooooooh ... oh yeah, DEFINITELY give it to Ashton, yeah ... good fit ...

Carbon dating? Hmmmmm ... hundreds of years? Yup, sounds right ...

Second day comes to an end ... a mushroom grove? Really, Pate?

Whoa ... Dynios, take a chill pill, man ... he's so intense ... O.O

Prism is a student ... yeah, course she smokes ... now what's Ashton doing? Oh boy ... Prism's most impressive achievement? Hmmm ... the Shadow Realm ... okay ... Ashton: "You spelling-bee'd your way out of your humdrum town?" Nice ... and now she's having an existential crisis? Yeah, the weed's giving her The Fear ...

Undercommon chat with Laudna ... intriguing ... Nice little private heart-to-heart for the girls ...

Laudna didn't EXACTLY eat anyone ... oh yeah, Delilah ... no, not technically cannibalism ...

Awwwww ... I love that, basically Laudna sees a lot of herself in Prism, that's so sweet ...

More cougar jokes ... XD

First watch ... it's good ... okay ... friendly unknown eyes in the dark? Bizarre ... these are like Will O' the Wisps? Hmmm ... they're harmless, clearly. Okay ... just Orym bring Nature Boy, clearly ...

I am totally having Pangur Ban in The Secret of Kells flashbacks with this description ... :3 I love how Orym's having a modest little spiritual experience in this moment.

Another day ... 16? Nice roll, Utkarsh!

The cougar jokes roll on ...

More bonding for Prism and Ashton ... ah yes, they are both a couple of unapologetic adrenaline junkies ...

More Scrying? Might be good ...

Ah yes, Imogen comes up ... Bor'Dor getting Laudna to open up ... yeah ... oh, yeah, the Ruidusborn thing ... yeah ...

Ah yes. The Hard Truths of their current situation ...

Deni$e still being on the fence about Dariax ... yeah ...

Another Scry ... here we go then ... ah yes, retconning the necessary components ...

Again, just an empty cabin? Hmmm ... could Bor'Dor's brother have just been Shunted away? Or does it not work that way? Hmmmm ...

Oh, OF COURSE Laudna has something of Imogen's, ate you kidding?

End of another day ... more camping ... try another Scry? On Ludinus this time? Oooooh ... sounds risky to me ...

Just a WALL, huh? Blocked ... sounds about right.

Oooh! Fishing! Just one, though ... yeah ... a tiny snack for ONE PERSON ... oh wow, Prism can make it LARGER?!!! Hmmmm ... yeah, clearly that doesn't work ... XD At least Deni$e catches more rabbit ...

Oooh, trash talking Chetney? Sounds like fun. XD

Heavy talk about Ludinus and what they want to do, NEED to do, etc ...

Oh man, yeah, Laudna's got a really great point there ... knowing as much as they do, they just can't do NOTHING anymore ...

Common ground at last -yeah, Ludinus gotta GO man ...

Insight check? Hmmmm ... indistinct ... yeah ... cue Muppet jokes ...

Oh boy ... Ashton gives Bor'Dor his pipe ... wow, here we go then ... what does Bor'Dor see? Wow ... he's living his best life RIGHT NOW?!!! That's actually kinda sweet ...

Good roll for the night, Utkarsh ...

Yet more cougar jokes ...

Orym using Seedling to try and communicate with the Wildmother ...

Bedtime ... and a BREAK!!! Okay then ...

Straight back in to Aimee getting a Whispers ... hmmmmm ... and then there's Orym with his insane passive Perception making that completely pointless ... XD

Now Matt is getting arsey about his password problems ... LOL Matt's passive aggressive frustration is so funny really ...

Oh ... shit roll? Matt makes them roll a D6 ... ah shit ...

Ah ... massive crevasse ... lovely ...

And the cougar is INSISTING they go DOWN?!!! Oof ... Laudna: "Damn it, Charlize Theron!"

Oh, THIS is the Canyon? Oh, okay ... so this IS the right way. Just ... not the EASY way ...

Prism supersizes Mother for Orym to pull a Link in Breath of the Wild ... O.O Ooh, so Mother is a BUFF raven with advantage on Strength checks ... Nice ... Liam rolls 2 ones on Perception, but OF COURSE since Orym's a halfling he gets to reroll ... 30? Matt: "Jesus ..." Yup, back to business as usual for Orym and his checks ...

Everybody is now JUMPING OFF THE EDGE OF THE CLIFF?!!! Fucking hell ... and Matt gets a snide little dig at Keyfish in ... XD

At least nobody SPLATS ... but yes, it still hurts ... oof ...

BIG ASS waterfall ... okay ... "vibrant blue bushes"? Okay .. here we are, then ...

Dynios is A BOOK, why would he want to get WET?!!! Oh dear gods ... yeah, he is definitely NOT HAPPY ... XD

Is this going to be the climax of the cougar jokes, then?

Whip of Warning? Interesting ...

Checking for illusions ... oh, here we go ... the hill? Okay ... sending in Pate, then ...

Wow, that dead rat is DENSE ...

Aha! Hidden entrance! Of course ... saw this coming ... Primordial? Hmmmm ...

Dexterity check ... yeah, well Laudna IS trying to look through Pate's eyes right now, so ...

Yeah, just follow the cougar ... Pass Without A Trace! Yup ... wow, crazy rolls all round ...

Low breathing? Oh shit ... the hill is ALIVE?!!! Of fucking COURSE it is ...

Everybody is now disappointed they will not get to know what this thing actually IS ... it's kind of adorable really ... :3

Prismatic crystals ... hmmm ...

I'm sorry, is prying these things out REALLY the smart move right now?

Ray of Frost ... hmmm ... Taliesin suggesting smothering this spell is a "shivering queef" ... LOL That's it, they have BROKEN MATT MERCER AGAIN!!! XD

Oh shit ... now what? EVERYBODY has to make a Dexterity save? Oof ... thankfully THEY ALL duck in time ... phew ...

Oh wait ... the cougar is LEAVING THEM NOW?!!! Really?

AGAIN they're considering stealing some of the crystals ... really? Come on, guys! Yes, it's a shrine, bad idea ...

Into the cavern, go on ...

Somewhat homey in here, actually ... and fancy with the crystals ... no more thievery, please ...

Just say hello? Yes, sounds like the smart play right now ...

Alcoves? Aha ... seems this is all just left for visitors, I think.

Ashton makes his presence felt in Primordial in the most SARCASTIC WAY imaginable. XD

Just follow the footprints, guys!

"wikiFEET"? XD

Bor'dor: "I'm from the Cyrios Mountains!" Deni$e: "Yeah, but what street?" Bor'Dor: "What do you MEAN street? It's a fucking MOUNTAIN!!!"

Obelisk? Okay ... this looks promising ...

The place has been prepared for an event? This is getting ominous, it feels awful circumstantial ...

Shit ... yeah, that's right, is it ... IS THAT Residuum?

Ashton referring to Percy as "the asshole in the castle" ... XD

There's somebody up there? Oh shit ...

Matt: "And THAT'S where we're gonna call it a night!" AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Are they in deep shit? Is this a trap? Is this a CLIFFHANGER?!!! NOOOOOOO ...

[eun-gealach]

Made myself one of these bad boys last minute. Come attack me if ya want!

https://artfight.net/~iLikeToDraw24

[andrewjosephminyards]

please write a hc about neil calling andrew “drew” in front of the foxes and everyone freaking out and trying to get away w also calling him drew tysm and have a nice day or night ! x

WHOOO ANON, Neil calling Andrew “’Drew” is literally one of my favorite things. This took a hot minute because I had no idea it was in my inbox, like I literally just found it with that ask I published a couple of days ago so if you sent it a while back then I am so so sorry, but I was so excited to find it and thank you so much for sending it, I hope you’re having a nice day/night as well! 

Also, I strayed just a little from the prompt and this turned into a monster of an answer, forgive me :’)

 So, without further adieu, the Foxes trying to get away with Neil Privileges™. 

It happens early during Neil’s sophomore season. 

Neil doesn’t mean to call Andrew “’Drew” in front of the other Foxes, but dammit the game they just won wasn’t easy between being slammed against the walls by the backliners more than half his size and running like a bat out of Hell up and down the court all night long. He’s tired and he’s sore and it just slips out. 

They’re all siting in the foyer, waiting for Wymack to start his post-game talk and Neil honestly thought he was being quieter than he apparently was, but he’s asking Andrew if they’re going to Columbia and the name slips. It comes out sleepy and soft and it shuts the whole team up, freshmen and all. 

For a minute, Neil doesn’t realize they’re being looked at, but Andrew does and the look he’s giving them all says they’d best not say a word about it. 

And they don’t. At first. 

Naturally, all of the foxes have been mulling this little interaction over in their heads, because it isn’t very often that they all get to see Neil so soft and sleepy. He’s very rarely tired enough to let his guard down around the freshmen enough to let them see something like that. 

And as such, they all treasure the moment in their hearts, because it’s a well-known fact the whole team has adopted Neil Josten. 

However, he’s a lot like a feral cat, so none of them actually mention it to either Andrew or Neil, rather they discuss it among themselves, which results in a bet as to whether or not that’s actually something Neil calls Andrew. 

Or maybe his voice cracked from being tired and it came out as “’Drew” even though he really said “Andrew.” 

They’re going to figure it out. 

They’re split about fifty-fifty. 

Actually a nickname: Matt, Dan, Allison. 

Not a nickname, just an accident: Nicky, Aaron, Kevin. 

Aaron and Kevin don’t really care, but they got dragged into the bet by Allison. 

Renee doesn’t bet, because she Knows and they all know she knows, but she just smiles like the angel she is when they ask her. She won’t even tell Allison. 

It’s a few days later, at practice, when Allison is the first to try it. They’re scrimmaging for the first time since that game instead of doing drills and Allison is on the opposing team. Neil’s on her team and he scores a painstaking shot. Up until this point, Andrew had kept his team’s goal clear. 

“Better luck next time, ‘Drew.” And she coos it, grinning like mad at the gremlin in the goal. 

Neil hisses her name, not happy she’s using his nickname for Andrew against him. And not exactly knowing how she even knew it in the first place. Because like I said, he was tired when it slipped and he’d really thought he was being quiet. 

Andrew says nothing. He doesn’t even narrow his eyes at her. There’s no reaction whatsoever. 

The ball that comes barreling at Allison the next time somebody tries for a goal on Andrew tells her she effectively got under his skin. 

Every subsequent shot after that comes her way. She leaves fairly bruised up and cursing Andrew to the high heavens, but pleased nonetheless to have gotten any kind of reaction from him at all. 

When they lose and have to run laps, she’s a little less pleased. Not to mention the dark bruises that have started to bloom whenever Andrew got a clear hit. 

Allison doesn’t mention the nickname again on the court. 

Andrew doesn’t say anything about it to Neil, because why would he? 

Even when Neil asks, he just shrugs, says he doesn’t care. 

He’s not angry over it, but that’s Neil’s. It’s become sacred without him realizing it, like pipedream, like keys, and home, like stay, like yes or no. 

Just because he isn’t angry over it doesn’t mean he likes it. 

Hearing it fall from anyone else’s lips leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. 

Neil knows, even if Andrew doesn’t tell him. Won’t tell him. 

The next time it happens, it’s Matt and it’s to Neil and Neil only. No one else is around, because Neil and Matt have the same hour out of classes and none of the other foxes do, so it’s just the two of them.  

Matt’s kind of picking at his salad, eyes on Neil and Neil just knows what’s coming. 

“So, Drew-?” Matt was only going to ask whether or not it was a nickname, not actually use the nickname, but Neil is faster with his words. 

“Don’t call him that.” It comes out quickly, sharp and cutting through the rest of Matt’s question, whatever it was. But it’s not harsh, not hateful, because this is Matt and Neil knows Matt doesn’t mean any harm. 

And because it’s Matt, he drops it immediately. A nod, an “okay,” and they move on to something else. 

Matt, inevitably, tells Dan that Neil doesn’t want them to call Andrew “’Drew” and she takes it in stride. But that doesn’t necessarily mean anything to her.

They still don’t have their answer to settle their bet. 

Nicky thinks that this would be the only bet he’d be happy to lost and that if it really is a nickname that Neil has for Andrew then that’s actually super sweet, but after living with his cousin for so long and seeing what happened with Allison, he decides he’s better off not testing any of their theories, especially not on Andrew. 

That leaves Aaron and Kevin. Aaron decides he sure as hell isn’t asking because his relationship with Andrew is still rocky at best. His relationship with Neil was even worse still, albeit on a different sort of level. So he immediately throws Kevin under the bus. 

“Kevin lives with them, make him figure it out.” 

Silence from the other foxes. They can all see Kevin’s internal screeching through his eyes. And then his adamant protests. 

Nicky points out that all Kevin really has to do is listen, but he’s still not digging this sudden turn of events and the responsibility of this entire bet being placed firmly upon his shoulders. 

Kevin argues and argues, but to no avail. He gets sent into battle without really being prepped. 

So he sits in their dorm and does his best to listen to every conversation they have while they’re in the living area, even those that are hushed though he’s pretty sure he could live without hearing 70% of those, but things sound as normal as they usually do. Neil calls Andrew by his name and Andrew usually responds with something along the lines of “Neil” or “fucking junkie.” 

Neil and Andrew both know that Kevin’s listening to their conversations. He’s not subtle. 

Even if he’s not looking at them, he’s not reacting like he usually does to the television or his laptop. 

Neil just kind of assumes he’s getting irritable because they’re talking during the exy games he’s watching, since the season has started out on a rockier note than they’d all hoped for. 

Andrew doubts it. He imagines he knows what Kevin’s listening for. So it’s Andrew that confronts Kevin: “Are you waiting for something, Day?” 

Kevin’s little jolt is all Andrew needs to know that he’s right. He goes so far as to pop an eyebrow up when Kevin glances at him. 

Kevin just shakes his head and puts his headphones in. He doesn’t feel like getting kicked out more than he already does. 

Days go by before any of the upperclassmen ask for a status report, everyone eagerly awaiting their answer. 

“He doesn’t call Andrew that around me. I am not asking.” 

Stark disappointment from all the other foxes and then some serious nagging for Kevin to figure it out somehow. 

This nagging continues right up until Andrew and Neil are around and then it stops entirely. 

Kevin’s still not been won over by that point and everyone’s actually starting to get a little discouraged or otherwise irritated that they can’t pin this down.  

Neil, for one, is feeling a pretty good sense of relief that the foxes have apparently forgotten about Allison calling Andrew “’Drew” and that Matt had completely let it go. 

Andrew’s pretty certain not a single one of the damned nuisances has forgotten. 

Unfortunately for the both of them, that’s the case, but it’s not the upperclassmen that necessarily make it unfortunate. 

It’s that very day at practice that the foxes get their answer. They’re split up to run drills by position when one of the freshmen Jack snarls something at Neil that most of the others can’t hear (Kevin can), but it flares Neil’s temper and he swings on Jack so fast no one really realized it was about to happen. 

The other foxes converge on the scene and break up the not-so-little brawl that’s gone down and it’s just as Matt’s trying to pull Neil back with Allison and Nicky putting themselves in between them and Kevin and Dan forcing Jack away from him that Neil snarls, “I’m the only one that can call him that you shit-faced motherfucker.” 

Matt gasps like he’s not heard worse, but Kevin’s head whips around and he’s staring wide-eyed at Neil. 

No one gets the chance to ask why until after practice because it’s a day that Wymack decides running off their tempers is as good an idea as any (and it is, since it essentially allows the freshmen and the other foxes to put a little distance between themselves, even if all of the freshmen aren’t so bad). 

It’s after practice that they’re finally able to ask Kevin what happened. 

Kevin just kind of clears his throat, tells them that Jack had thrown around some insults at Neil through practice (nothing new) and then said something about Andrew, which Neil ignored again, and then the one thing he said that pushed Neil over the edge was something about “Drew.” 

Kevin doesn’t know what the last insult was exactly, but he does know he heard that. He’d been trying to hear it all week.  

Money exchanges hands immediately. Allison’s smug, Kevin’s irritated that he just made himself lose the bet. 

None of the foxes ever try to get away with it again. 

But Neil eventually, slowly, lets himself call Andrew Drew in front of the foxes. And Andrew can’t really say that he minds. As long as it only falls from Neil’s lips from then on. 

And a little something extra for the first time Neil calls Andrew “’Drew”, like this isn’t already long enough: 

Again, the above situation happens early in Neil’s sophomore season. 

And Neil’s only recently started calling Andrew “’Drew.” 

That, too, started as an accident. 

It was a good day and Neil had just made coffee after his run and he fixed himself a cup and then Andrew.

And upon taking a sip of his own coffee, he burns his tongue, so when he calls for Andrew, he’s talking fast and it comes out like “Mm. ‘Drew, coffee!” 

Neil pauses a moment, realizes what he’s done and turns to slip out the door immediately.

For once in his life, he’s not fast enough. 

Andrew’s there, picking up his coffee, eyebrow rising in question as he takes a sip. 

Neil says nothing, just smiles and sips his own (too-hot) coffee again. 

Andrew hums at his and Neil takes that as a pass. His coffee was acceptable this time. He’s getting the hang of how sweet Andrew’s has to be for it to be even passable. (Which, he already knew what made it passable, but sometimes he just isn’t willing to check and see if he’s put the right amount of sugar in the man’s coffee himself.) 

They stand there for a few minutes, Neil relaxing, glad Andrew either hadn’t caught the little slip or just didn’t care enough to say anything. 

And it’s then, just when Neil thinks he’s safe, that Andrew says, “Drew?” 

Neil flinches, points at his mouth, now molded into a sheepish smile. “I burned my tongue and it slipped.” 

Andrew nods, accepting the fact for what it was, ignoring the slight disappointment that he may or may not feel, that had followed the butterflies in his stomach that he may or may not have been trying to kill. 

And then Neil says, “Unless… unless I can? Call you that, I mean.” It’s tentative, quiet, like he’s trying something he didn’t even expect himself to try. 

Andrew simply looks at him, those stupid fucking butterflies starting up again, even as he very desperately tried to squash the damn things mentally. 

They stand there again for a good two minutes before Neil says anything else in the form of a very soft, “yes or no?” 

Andrew presses his lips into a thin line just before he rolls his eyes, lets out a long suffering sigh, and averts his gaze from Neil’s bright eyes. He can’t take the little bit of hope that shown in them. It only made the horrendous psychologically-induced stomach-creatures worse. 

Then, “Yes.” 

Neil lets out a little puff of a laugh, something disbelieving and overall giddy that Andrew didn’t mind if he called him Drew. 

It was something else for the two of them, something special that no one else could ever quite understand. There was meaning there that meant more than either of them could fathom in the past or that they could even really fathom now, but that they would learn to understand as they learned to understand other things in the future like being really and truly happy, like complete and unequivocal trust. 

[lookbluesoup]

I’m sorry uh I couldn’t pick but 1-5 for Nate/Nora?

Whooo thanks so much for this! :D It’s great to delve into the dynamics of these two xD

1. Who makes the first move and how?

Nate! Nora’s mother, being a general, paid a visit to the base Nate was at early in his career. Nora, being Nora, managed to finagle her way into tagging along. She was something to behold, red hair and legs, and the subject of much gawking by Nate’s unit. The universal consensus settled on her being way out of their league (and with her family name, nothing short of terrifying.)

Nate was smitten from the start, and, after he and his buddies finished prodding one another, crossed the tarmac followed by a lot of whooping and hollering to go say hello. His friends took bets on how long it would take Nate to strikeout. He asked Nora to dinner at his favorite hangout, well below the standards of her family. But she liked his eyes, and that plucky charm.

The look on his mates’ faces when Nate came back with a thumbs up? Priceless.

2. Who is the most insecure and what makes them feel better?

Surprisingly, it was Miss “I Know Exactly What I Want and How To Get It” Nora. She was the practical, more worldly of the pair. She wasn’t looking for ‘true love’ or even actively planning to get married before she met Nate. Stumbling onto someone who felt like a soulmate just didn’t sit right with those sensibilities. xD This led her to be unreasonably demanding, putting their blossoming relationship to the test in search of assurances that it was “Real.” Nate’s exceptional patience came to the rescue, and the lucky solution was that each time it became an opportunity for them to learn more about one another’s boundaries and to communicate more effectively as a team, assuring both of their dedication. 

3. Who is the most romantic?

Nateeeee. Nate is a cheeseball. Nate is embarrassing. He will sing her songs!! He will bring home bouquets!! He will arrange elaborate weekend getaways up in the blooming spring mountains beside a crystal clear lake where fireflies dance at night and the moon reflects off the calm waters and you can see all the stars in the sky!!!

4. Who can’t keep their hands to themselves? // 5. Who says ‘I love you’ first?

(Answered here! :D)