#god bless sandra oh

[vampyre-rat]

building furniture for my mum and blasting “im just ken”

[wearevillaneve]

Hey! I just wanted to tell you that I adore your blog. I barely got into Killing Eve (fortunately and unfortunately spoiled already), but I want to say thank you. Just for interacting and contributing to the fandom. I am very sad it's dead, but at this point, I'm willing to wait and poke it with a stick.

Still, I applaud and salute your efforts nonetheless. I hope that when you retire this blog, the series won't be tarnished by the last season and finale.

Anyway, this show is incredible, I love the characters and relationship. I'm astonished how there isn't more love for them. To me, they're the embodiment of a perfect otp.

Love you and this wonderful blog, and I will scrounge around the ruins to see how late I am to the party.

Oh, you're not late to the party. It's just a much different party than it was four or five years ago. It's not so much that the fandom is dead as that it's not very lively either. This is what happens when a once-great show ends in a repulsive and polarizing manner, as Killing Eve did in 2022.

I said "goodbye," but I'm not completely gone. I'm still working hard on finishing my last (maybe) fic, and I'm enjoying doing so. It's not easy to rid myself of my Eve and Villanelle obsession, but it's gotten easier than it was after that shitty finale. No spoilers for anybody who is watching the show on Netflix, but I'm gonna tell you right now that the final show in the final season completely sucks. Everything that needed to be said about Killing Eve has been said and by bigger and better fans than me. I welcome the new blood who are only now finding this little gem of a show. Once upon a time there was an extremely fertile, energetic, and boisterous fandom that dissected every detail and obsessed endlessly over the myriad twists and turns the show took over its first two seasons. Then came Season Three and Killing Eve stalled. Next came Season Four and it fell ass-first off a cliff. The fandom took a fall too. Today, what little remains of this supposed "fandom" posts pics of Jodie walking her fucking dog and that takes care of their fix for a day or two. Fine for them, but that isn't going to do it for me.

This really IS a dead fandom. Sandra and Jodie are still very much alive, but the show, despite its resurrection on Netflix is as dead as it gets. Barring a highly unlikely revival, Killing Eve ain't coming back from the grave. There is no shame in not hanging around when there's nothing really going on. God bless Sandra and The Sympathizer and Jodie and The Bikeriders. I wish them both well, but their non-KE projects are no reason to hang on to a show they have put far behind them. Thank you for the Ask. I'm sure this response is a little more dour and pessimistic than I meant for it to come off, but it's better to burn out than hang around and rust.

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Inner Demons (Part 2)

(tw: domestic abuse, ft. @idiotwithanipad 's oc Amy)

"Wazuuuup!"

Silver's cheerful greeting as she walks through the door into Higham Suite is met by eight startled and, mostly bemused, frowns.

She drops her hands to her side.

"Okay, that was dated even when I died. Let's go with, hey guys!" She tried again, showing her palms.

"Silvy!" Kitty, as always, is the first on her feet to rush over and give her the biggest hug.

Despite being picky on big physical affection, she always indulges the clingy Georgian, especially on her first and last night each month. Given how little ghosts were able to touch in their existence, it was honestly nice to be able to feel each other as much as possible.

"Hey, gorgeous." Silver grinned, catching her breath upon release after Kitty nearly crushes the air out of her.

Amy has already budged up to give her a seat, Silver feeling blessed to be the reason behind that rare smile and brightness upon her face when she sees her enter.

"'Sup, dude." Silver plops her bum down next to her, knocking her first against hers, "Staying in trouble?"

"Always." The energy-drink chugger grinned, affectionately.

She gave a brief, fond hello to the others in the room. It was always a rather strange experience waking up to 'come back' after a month. On the one hand it felt as though she hadn't been gone long, and in truth she hadn't so much as left the grounds. Her body had been close enough for them to see her whenever they wished. On the other, a lot could happen in a month for a sleeping person to miss out on.

"Anything for me to catch up on?" Silver asked, mentally doing a quick head count to make sure everyone was present, forever mindful of the time she'd been unaware of one who had left.

All seemed to be present and accounted for.

"Not much. Alison and the family are in Cuba for two weeks. They don't have any internet where they're staying but we got a text to say it's beautiful and Mike already has food poisoning." Julian informed.

"Nice. Lucky sods." The Americas, Canada in particular, had always been on her bucket list of places to visit. Not gonna happen now.

At least she had her fantasy realms in her dreams. That beat Vancouver, she supposed.

"Sandra at Reception got fired." Humphrey shared, his head in the lap of his own body, sat next to Amy.

"What?! Why? I liked her."

"Money laundering." Fanny piped.

"No! How would she even-?!" Silver shook her head; "Talk about a dark horse."

There were a few more updates, some saucy details on guests that were currently staying, a few pictures sent to their laptop of Mia in her school uniform as she started Year 5 that tugged at Silver's heartstrings. Gods, she was growing up fast.

Once she was all caught up, everyone was eager to get back to their games.

"Right, I believe Kitty got the last one right so, up you get, pet!" Pat beckoned her up into the centre of their circle.

Ten minutes later, they were staring intently at her as she kept gesturing to some tiny condiments of jam and honey and sugar that had been left on the sideboard.

"Uhh, sweets? American Sweetheart? I think that's a film." Silver frowned.

"It's only one word, remember." Cap pointed out.

"Oh how can you not get it?! It's so obvious!" Kitty huffed and continued to gesticulate to the objects; "It's Jars!"

Silver looked at Amy, the two as befuddled as each other.

"I don't think I've heard of that one..." She admitted.

"Well I haven't seen it either but I remember Michael once talking about how it, apparently it's this terrifying film about giant jars that attack people on beaches-."

"D'you mean Jaws?!" Asked Pat.

"Oh yes, that's it!"

A collective groan rippled throughout the room. Silver and Amy shared suppressed chuckles, then turning to look at Kitty apologetically as she sat down in a sulk. Bless her heart.

The gentle laughter was disrupted by the thump of a door slamming in the next room, followed by some muffled, raised voices.

Silver frowned, feeling the mood of the room deflate in an instant.

"Uh oh. They're at it again." Julian mumbled.

"Who's they?" Asked Silver.

"Doesn't matter. Best to ignore them." Humphrey waved off, though his body was inching a little closer to Amy; "Who's next?"

"There wasn't a winner with that last one, but seeing as we've all had a turn - Silver, love, you wanna go?" Pat asked, a little too positive.

It wasn't so easy for her to shake off the sense of unease that quick event and everyone's reactions to it. But when she glanced at Kitty, then Amy, at how uncomfortable their expressions were, she understood the need for a distraction.

Summoning her inner sunshine, she put on a smile and jumped to her feet.

"Okay!" She held up two fingers.

Two words.

First word.

She held up her fingers to sign a 'T'.

"The Craft?!" Everyone guessed with that same groan.

"No! I do know other films!" She protested. Dicks.

Second word.

She placed her hands together, pinkies side by side, as if collecting rain water in her palms, then lifted it to cover her face.

Now they were thinking. Even Amy looked a little lost. This would have been quite a bit before her time, but not too obscure.

"Washing? Water? Face? Covering?" Fanny guessed, fingers tapping her chin.

Julian slapped his knees; "The Mask! Classic!"

"The Tory's got it!" Silver grinned and everyone gave him a light applause.

Once again, there was the sound of something heavy being knocked, like a foot colliding with a table or a bed post. Followed by more shouting.

Amy's head retreated inside her hoodie. The hand of Humphrey's body reached across to squeeze her leg.

"Seriously, what the hell?" Silver asked, never liking to see her friend upset.

"A domestic dispute, none of our business." Fanny stated.

"Yeah, it's attitudes like that which meant men could get away with pushing their wives out of windows, Lady B."

The Edwardian looked aghast, before realising that the younger woman had a point.

Silver walked towards the wall, shaking off Robin's attempt to grab at her shirt.

Passing through into the next room, she entered in time to see a beautiful woman with blonde curls, stunning enough to pass for a super model - and perhaps she was - sat at her makeup table and sobbing, mascara running down her cheeks.

An older man in a crisp white shirt and loosened tie was pacing behind her.

"Do I ask you for much? Do I ask you to pay me back for all the dresses and jewelry I buy you?! Do I expect you to work?!" He was berating her.

The woman sniffed and shook her head; "No, Tom."

"No, Tom, exactly! All I ask is that you don't fucking embarras me but two glasses of wine and you're making us into a fucking spectacle!"

"I'm sorry! If you want someone perfect to show off to your mates, maybe bring your whore!"

"Perhaps I will! She'd have more dignity than you, you pathetic lush!"

"LEAVE HER ALONE!" Silver shouted in his face, ready to swing for him, only to have him walk straight through her.

Shit. Shit, fuck, shit, that always sucks.

Silver turned to see that the guy was now kneeling before her seat, reaching for her manicured hand.

"I'm sorry, baby, I'm sorry, you know I don't mean it." His voice suddenly turned so soft, "It's why you shouldn't wind me up because you know how it makes me."

"Don't fall for it. Leave his arse. You could do so much better than him." Silver made a foolish attempt to get through to the woman.

But she was already melting, her hand moving to cover his. She nodded.

"I know...I'm sorry I keep letting you down."

"Sweet Hera." Silver rolled her eyes; "Girls like you are your own worst enemy."

"See why we no bother? It not worth headache."

She turned to see that Robin followed her in.

That wasn't right though. It wasn't how it should be.

"How do you do it? How do you just...watch people destroy each other and not be able to help?" She asks him. He must have had enough experience.

A sadness darkened Robin's face and he gave a deflated shrug.

"Just gotta hope words get through to them. And if it get real bad....that when we be there."

"You mean when it's too late?"

"It never too late to be there for someone, Moonah girl."

That was true. She turned away from the couple and took the caveman's outstretched hand, letting him lead her back into the bedroom. There was still a few hours left before everyone would be going off to bed and she wanted to spend as much time as she could with her friends.

Amy, the night owl, would stay up with her until midnight. Long after the others had fallen asleep, the two would walk around the hotel and chat, catching up on anything she might not have wanted to speak up on with the others present. And then Kitty, the early bird, would be up at the crack of dawn, as well as Cap. She might try to race him for their morning jog or maybe just go for a stroll and a chat by the lake with Kitty before watching the cooks prepare breakfast in the kitchens.

And in the few hours in between? Silver would be alone. But that was okay. She was surrounded by life, asleep and awake. Mother Earth sustained each of her steps as she walked across the silent grounds. With Kya in her hands, they'd go watch the deers and the badgers in their dens. She'd sit on the roof beneath the stars and talk to Mary, continue to share her dreams as she had before she moved on. And she'd meditate before the statues at her bed to connect with her gods.

Rarely did she ever spend her nights within the walls of the hotel.

So she doesn't know what draws her to wandering the halls this time, after she's left Amy to be tucked up under Humphrey's cloak. She can't explain why she's drawn to each of the occupied rooms, her fingers stroking over the doors. Not feeling the wood, but the unseen barriers that existed, meant to ward off uninvited entities. Fairies. Vampires. They weren't supposed to be able to enter where not invited. Not like ghosts.

Not like....It.

Her stomach is rumbling. Strange. She isn't supposed to be able to eat anymore. Not even lingering around the cakes at the Bake Off or the buffet in the dining hall made her truly hungry.

On the other side of one particular door in what used to be Thomas' room, is a family of three.

Mum, stepdad, young boy. Eight.

The boy's allergies are acting up from all the pollen, to the point that it's turning into a cold. Hay fever at its most literal.

Silver passes through and stands at the foot of his bed.

He's making tiny mewling noises, turning this way and that beneath his sheets, Ben 10 pajamas twisted around him. His parents sleep across the room, oblivious to how unsettled he is, the wine they consumed with their meal aiding their sleep.

An aura of innocent fear hovers around the child. Silver can taste the anxiety on the tip of her tongue.

More. She needs more.

Her hand is reaching towards the boys exposed foot. No socks. Rookie mistake.

Suddenly, he sits up and stares at her, eyes wide as saucers.

"MUM! MUMMY!"

Silver stumbles back, the boy's look of pure terror as his eyes met hers making her blood run cold. Had he...? No. Surely the sight of her wasn't enough to bring out such a bone chilling scream.

The boy's parents awoke and his mother was staggering out of bed and at his side in an instant, cradling him to her. His dad got up too, making sure the door was locked and checking under the bed. Checking for monsters, even if he didn't believe in them, as all good dads do.

"It was there! It was standing there!" The boy continued to point at the foot of the bed, where Silver still stood; "The monster!"

Monster. Not girl.

A trick of the light or nightmare bleeding into reality? Babies and toddlers had seen her before, like Mia, and most of the time the sight of her colourful hair and feather earring made them smile. She wasn't scary. It was the last thing she wanted to be, at least for children.

Quickly, she turns and leaves the room, not wanting to disturb the kid further.

What...What was that about? Why had she been there?

Moving her hand up to scratch her scalp, she then pulled it back to find a large clump of black in her palm. What.

Shit, fucking, what?!

Rushing into one of the en suite bathrooms, illuminated by the moonlight entering through the window, she glanced at herself in the mirror. There it was. A patch of white skin just behind her fringe. As she reached up a second time, more of it began to fall to her shoulders.

Then there were her fingers. Staring at her hands, she noticed how much longer each digit appeared. Her fingernails sharpened into points.

In the back of her mind, one word reared its ugly head from the shadows of her suppressed memories.

"Mine."

[wosona]

okay now i'm excited https://x.com/yayletmesleep/status/1799879662648053834?s=46

oh my god yay thank you for this

pull through mimi please 🙏

watching socceraid instead tonight, but saw 2-1 👀👀 hope the girls score 7 in the second half, at least 5 from mario, 1 from sandra for fun and then an onagol to bless us after our 3 week drought

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Peter Lindbergh

* * * * *

Poem from Sandra Cisneros, the author, most recently, of the poetry collection 'My Wicked Wicked Ways', and 'A House of My Own: Stories From My Life.' God Breaks the Heart Again and Again Until It Stays Open after a quote from Sufi Inayat Khan But what if my heart is a 7-Eleven after its third daytime robbery in a week? What if my heart is a piñata trashed to tissue and peppermint shrapnel? What if my heart is a peeled mango bearing an emerald housefly? What if my heart is an air conditioner weeping a rosary of rusty tears? What if my heart is Sebastião Salgado’s sinkhole swallowing another child? What if my heart is Death Valley in wide-view Cinemascope? What if my heart is a chupacabrón chanting, Build the wall? What if my heart is the creepy uncle’s yawning zipper? What if my heart is a Pentecostal babbling a river of tongues? What if my heart is the cross-eyed Jesus bought at the Poteet flea market? What if my heart is El Paso, Texas, in bed with the corpse of Ciudad Juárez? What if my heart is unhinged from the weight of its lice-ridden wings? What then for an encore, oh my soul, when you have blessed me a hundredfold? [Thanks Candace]

[Thanks “Alive On All Channels”]

[hismercytomyjustice]

God bless y’all folks willing to write dialogue for characters like Elminster. Y’all are built different.

I was gonna put a whole convo between him and Gale in this never ending fic but then rewatched a cutscene with him and refused.

Hopefully it doesn’t break the flow up too much, but.

I. Cannot.

Spend literal days hours researching stuff like the Drow language and culture, DND vampire lore, in-game books, etc?

Sure. Don’t mind if I do. Like 0.5% of it will actually wind up in this fic, but I HAVE A MIGHTY NEED.

Try to learn enough about Elminster’s speech patterns to write dialogue for him?

Abso-fucking-lutely not. Idk why that’s where I draw the line, but it is and the line is drawn.

No. Nuh uh. Never gonna happen. 🙅

Also, got wildly distracted while fact checking on him. He was a woman briefly? And a Drow? And the heir to the throne of the lost kingdom of Athalantar? And a founding member of the Harpers?

Sir. You have been in far too many seasons of DND.

Haha, I get it tho. It just reminds me of characters in super long running shows that have already been kidnapped/killed/in 70 different relationships/etc. Like, the characters in Criminal Minds should not be able to function after the number of times they’ve been targeted by murderers, framed for crimes, kidnapped, etc.

And all the characters in Grey’s Anatomy have absolutely ruined medical statistics. How many of them have had brain surgery, near death experiences, etc now? I watched it for a little bit during Covid lockdown out of curiosity but I had to stop when Sandra Oh’s character got impaled by a gigantic icicle that fell from the hospital’s roof. I am willing to suspend my disbelief, especially for Sandra Oh, but I can only suspend it so far.

And now I’m wildly off topic and distracted again…

[aclaywrites]

How to fall in love via Deneuve Magazine Personal Ads Circa 1993

❖ Go to your mailbox and see that your latest issue of Deneuve magazine has been delivered. It’s in a plain brown envelope, but you still take it all the way inside the house before you open it.

❖ Take a moment to gaze at the cover and appreciate the fact that it’s named after Catherine Deneuve in honor of her sex scene from The Hunger which awakened us all.

❖ Flip past the first few pages of ads. Do I want to fax away for a brochure about the chance to go on a Kenyan photo safari with the world’s first out lesbian commedienne? What about the Olivia Thanksgiving cruise?

❖ Enjoy the Editor’s Column about how our new President Clinton has pledged to make real progress for the LGBT community. Bask in the warm glow of happiness knowing that the gay dark ages are finally coming to a close.

❖ Chuckle at Alison Bechdel’s ad for the Feminist Bookstore Network and wish you had one of those stores near you.

❖ Keep up with the state of the lesbian nation via the letters to the editor. Aren’t the repressive laws being passed in Oregon and Colorado shocking? Goddess bless that Kentucky baby dyke having to dodge the KKK at her high school 🙁

❖ Read the wedding announcements and get all choked up, remembering why you’re here. Resist the urge to flip to the end and see if there’s anyone new from last month. Hope springs eternal!

❖ Oh, the 20th anniversary of Naiad Press! I love their stuff! Especially how all the covers look like they’re printed with ink that was on sale. I wonder if they have any more copies of that Lesbian Queries book from 1990???

❖ Audre Lorde sure is gonna give them hell at the march on Washington, eh?

❖ So many bookstores. So many books.

❖ An article about Safe Sex! Hell yes! Even though lesbians don’t get AIDS because we’re God’s chosen people, this will be fun to read about in theory! “After all, aren’t we told that lesbians and priests are in the lowest risk category?” lol people thought priests weren’t constantly having gay sex. Simpler times.

❖ An interview with Alison Bechdel! She’s so swoony.

❖ Articles about soap operas, speculation about Hilary Clinton, gossip about Madonna and Sandra Bernhard. And what about Whoopi Goldberg? And that Ellen lady? She’s been on Arsenio Hall acting all cagy about the men in her life. A list of women we wish were gay, including Joan Jett? Didn’t she sing Crimson and Clover without changing pronouns like waaaaay back in the 80s

❖ Music reviews: Sweet Honey in the Rock and Alix Dobkin! We’re almost to the ads…

❖ Labrys jewelry, freedom rings. C’mon, let’s get to the good stuff!

❖ Here we go! Classified ads– 30 words for $20! Queer personal finance, we buy used computers, a lesbian resort in New Hampshire.

❖ Personals at last! Is my woman here?

❖ Hey there’s that woman who has an ad every month expressing her ‘complete and sincere respect for’ women in military, fire, police, private security, corrections’. A gay male ad would say ‘Uniform fetish’ but apparently we’re too delicate.

❖ Bisexual boston babe ‘femalely handsome’ looking for someone who’s ‘nice to look at, not a feminist and not a bitch’. Next!

❖ Lonesome in Wyoming, Bisexual Bodybuilder, Softball is over, time to find someone warm for winter, Reubenesque Arkansas Buddhist…

❖ Find a girl who sounds promising– seems interesting and is not too far away. Spend a day or so composing a letter with a pen and piece of paper introducing yourself. If you don’t have a photo of yourself that you like, have a friend take one. Then finish the roll of film and bring it to the Fotomat and wait a day or so and then pick up the prints and hope you like one of them. Choose one anyway, and put it in the envelope with your letter.

❖ Get a stamp, hang it on the mailbox, never hear anything ever again.

❖ One month later, go to your mailbox and see that your copy of Deneuve has arrived.

[o-n-l-y-l-o-v-e]

Well wishes

AWWW Amanda !!!! So enjoyed working with you !! Best of luck to you

Gloria

NOOOOOOOO!!!

Wow Amanda,

You will definitely be missed. Where are you headed if you don’t mind me asking? I will miss you my friend.

Best wishes on your new endeavor, 😊

Juanyce

Oh my gosh!! Where are you going and can you take me with you LOL!

Merry Christmas!

Paula

Best of luck on your next endeavors. It was a joy working with you

TAN

Oh my gosh! I will miss you. Thank you so very much for all your help through the past years. I hope for lots of good fortune and happiness in your new position.

Barbara

Hi Amanda,

Best wishes for all of your future endeavors, and happy holiday!

You will be missed. No one submits a macro issue Case as well as you do and you’ve always been a great Benefits partner 😊

Christy

Hey Amanda,

Awwww I’m sad to hear you’re leaving CVS, but it was a pleasure to work w/ you… and I wish the absolute best for you on your next adventure!! I hope you have a Merry Christmas!!

Kami

Happy Wishes to you and your loved ones.

Many Blessings to your journey 😊😊

You will be missed.

Sandra

Best of luck on your future endeavors, Amanda. It’s been such a pleasure working with you and learning so much from you over the years. Happy Holidays!

Michelle

Good luck in your future roles! Was great working with you over the years.

Afua

I wish you the Super best in all you do!!!

Thank you for being amazing!

Happy Holidays!

Carol

Hello Amanda,

I wish you only the best in your future, may God bless you and guide you , and protect you! Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and your family ! 😊

Yelena

Ahhh…we will miss you!! Good luck in your next endeavor 😊

Colleen

Good Luck Amanda – We appreciate all of your hard work and contributions to our team.

Marty

LOL! Short sweet, and to the point.

Hollie

Awwww... Sad to see you go. Good Luck in your new adventure. Happy Holidays!

Shay

Happy Holidays, Amanda and good luck in your next endeavor!! It was a pleasure working with you!

Allison

Hi Amanda,

It’s been a pleasure working with you. I wish you the very best in your future endeavors!!!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! 😊

Brittney

Best of luck Amanda!

Michael

Congratulations my love!!

You will be sorely missed & may god the universe bless you in your new journey 😊

Be Safe and Be Well 😊,

Jacqulyné

Amanda,

You were always so great to work with and easy to talk with, and you helped bring the Med D subcommittee to life! I’m really going to miss working with you and chatting with you about random stuff (and cats lol!). Best of luck in your new journey!

Christina

☹ NOOOOOOO. YOU WILL BE MISSED

I will miss working with you, enjoy your new adventure

Linda

Awwww – What a beautiful pic 😊

God Bless you and your family as well.

Enjoy the holidays and thank you so much for all your contributions.

Primavera

Wow!! You will be missed by all, my first teammate teacher ever! I hope your future career is great!

Alex

It has been a pleasure Amanda! Best of Luck to you! Love the quote!

Julia

OMG Amanda,

I am truly going to miss you. I wish you the best – are you on LinkedIn?

Simone

Hi Amanda,

I am so sorry you are leaving us. Best of luck in in your new endeavor and into the New Year! Happy Holidays for you and family. You will be missed!

Kiwana

It’s sad to hear that you are leaving CVS.

Wish you all the very best in your endeavors! Thank you!

Kather

Sorry to hear you are leaving. Best wishes.

Jennifer

Have a great holiday!! We will certainly miss you!! Good luck!!

Jamie

Good luck in your future endeavors!!!!

Grace

[rorykillmore]

THE WINNER IS LA LA LAND

[sweetpeamoonshine-blog]

Don't forget that Sandra Oh was in The Princess Diaries 🌻

[saphiiiic]

Killing Eve crew members watching Jodie and Sandra eat each other up like a three course meal in the middle of that road after Laura Neal told them to have a quick unromantic peck

[oksanaastankova]

did you hear about that series, starring jodie comer, where two women become obsessed with each other, and one of them is married and cheats on her husband and the obsession turns into a relationship and its like a dark drama/comedy? no, not that one.

[wearevillaneve]

My opinion: Nobody else could play Villanelle and Eve like Jodie Comer and Sandra Oh but...Jodie is 29 and Sandra is 51. The 21-22 age difference is kinda disgusting. I guess an older actress could've been cast for Villanelle, or a younger actress for Eve, but then again, nobody else could play these characters. What do you think?

I agree with you that nobody else could have played these characters. Not the other actresses that read or tried out for the part of Villanelle and certainly not Maya Rudolph as Eve. Sometimes the planets and stars align and the coffee is brewed just so and the music hits the perfect note and you just get it right. Sandra Oh IS Eve. Jodie Comer IS Villanelle. I can't conceive of any other actress playing those parts. Accept no substitutes.

The world is full of beautiful and talented and capable actresses who could have been Eve and Villanelle. No question. Maybe Sandra decides she doesn't want to spend months on end flying from L.A. to London. Maybe Jodie decides not to fight the odds to be cast as Villanelle and tells, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, "Thanks, but no thanks." I don't get what's so "disgusting" about the age difference between the two leads. Younger women can't be attracted to older women or something? If it bothers you, then stick to Luke Jennings' books where Eve and Villanelle are closer in age. For the purposes of Waller-Bridge, she chose to go with Oh and Comer based on their chemistry together and not their age gap. There are many reasons why it shouldn't have worked, but none of them matter. What does matter is it did work. PWB, BBC America, and Sid Gentle Productions paired a young White woman from Liverpool with a heavy accent with a mature Korean woman from Canada and living in Los Angeles as an Englishwoman, and said, "Make magic happen." They made the magic. PWB's brilliant writing got the ball rolling, but it was the awesome abilities of Comer and Oh as the thespians who made Killing Eve's heart beat so strongly that carried the show through four years of churning through head writers, directors, actors, scripts, dialogue and plots of wildly varying quality. Sandra wins a Golden Globe. Jodie scores a BAFTA and an Emmy. The show garners near-universal praise and acclaim for a brilliant first season. The momentum slows in the second season but remains high with Comer's Villanelle emerging as the show's breakout sensation while Oh plugs away in a secondary, but still significant role. Along comes Season Three and with it a noticeable and precipitous drop in momentum and quality. Oh is stuck muddling along in a reduced role that only reacts to the actions of others and precipitates nothing, and is so overlooked and ignored by the head writer Eve is completely written out of an entire episode despite being the titular character. Comer sleepwalks through the third season only coming alive briefly in the award-bait solo flex for Villanelle and random moments throughout.

Season Three is lesser Killer Eve with both actresses left stranded by muddled and unfocused writing as well as the unnecessary introduction of superfluous characters and dead-end plots, but it's brilliant compared to the shitshow that was Season Four, the one season that doesn't require a deep dive because it gives me a fucking headache to say any more about it over than fuck Laura Neal. Yet despite the drop-off of Season Three and the catastrophe that was Season Four, at no point in Killing Eve's brilliant rise and graceless fall can the blame be placed on Oh or Comer going through the motions and phoning it in. They TRIED hard. Even in the moments when Jodie seemed checked out, she was still balling hard and acting her ass off. Both were again nominated in the lackluster two seasons for Best Lead Actress in a Drama only to lose to Zendaya for Euphoria in 2021, an outcome that may play out again in 2022 next month at the Emmys. Who cares? Awards are nice little ego strokes for the winners and help them maximize their earnings potential, but they are lousy measuring sticks for what's really exceptional and what's not. Win or lose, Sandra Oh and Jodie Comer remain the saving grace of Killing Eve. Nobody else could have made the magic in quite the way they did.

[ficsforeren]

https://the-princess-button.tumblr.com/post/670028479659737088/the-eren-jaeger-library

I’ve made a rec list for you babe!! I couldn’t rest until I did it LOL

Everyone please go check out the lovely Eren writers of tumblr and AO3 ❤️

SANDRAAAAAA

[dumbledee]

so i’m late to the party and i just started killing eve and,,,,,,wOW

[calzona-ga]

Since 2005, Shondaland has produced groundbreaking television. And over the course of 17 seasons, Grey’s Anatomy has made more than its fair share of bold choices. From the killing off of Patrick Dempsey’s beloved McDreamy to the still-controversial ghost-sex story line, the ABC series has seen, and done, it all. But perhaps no episode was riskier than turning the popular medical drama into a musical for “Song Beneath the Song,” the infamous season-7 hour in which a pregnant Callie (Sara Ramirez) gets badly injured in a car accident and, while her fellow doctors work to save her life, sees her hallucinatory self burst into song — with the rest of the characters quickly following suit.

Coming from the mind of series creator Shonda Rhimes, a vocal fan of both Broadway shows and TV musicals like Buffy’s “Once More, With Feeling,” the Grey’s musical episode was a monumental moment for the show and for television. Many viewers praised its audacity and swooned over the vocal chops of stars like Ramirez and Chandra Wilson.

“Song Beneath the Song” made for one of the most memorable hours of television, earning strong ratings and leading the soundtrack, particularly Ramirez’s show-stopping rendition of Brandi Carlile’s “The Story,” to Billboard success. A decade later, its impact is still growing, thanks in part to the countless teenage Grey’s fans who’ve only recently discovered the series via Netflix. Like the show itself, the musical has become an indelible part of TV history — and so, 10 years after its premiere in March 2011, we spoke to the episode’s cast and crew to get the story of how it came to be.

Featuring thoughts from Rhimes; writers, producers, and co-showrunners Tony Phelan and Joan Rater; and actors Wilson, Kevin McKidd, Jessica Capshaw, Kim Raver, and Eric Dane, this is the oral history of “Song Beneath the Song.”

Finding the Inspiration

Inspired by a 2008 benefit concert in which several stars of Grey’s and its spinoff show Private Practice performed songs to support out-of-work Hollywood workers during the 2007-2008 writers’ strike, Rhimes decided to turn her long-held desire to make a Grey’s musical episode into a reality.

Rhimes (series creator and writer): I remember thinking to myself at a certain point, I have this sort of murderers’ row of Broadway people. Like, Chandra had been on Broadway and singing; obviously, Sara Ramirez had won a Tony on Broadway [for Best Featured Actress in a Musical, in 2005], which is how I first met her; and then I knew that Kevin could sing. There were so many people in the show with beautiful voices. ... It felt like it was leaning in that direction in a good way.

Rater (writer, producer, and co-showrunner): The first iteration for, like, two days when we first started batting around the idea was that we would write original music. It was all gonna be original music. And then we quickly realized that a) who’s gonna write that music?, and b) no, it doesn’t feel like the right thing. And then Shonda, I think a day or two later, came in with the idea that we would use these iconic songs.

Wilson (Dr. Miranda Bailey): But the studio wasn’t quite on board with this whole idea.

Convincing a Skeptical Network

After coming up with the episode’s plot and deciding that the characters would sing classic songs from the Grey’s soundtrack, like Snow Patrol’s “Chasing Cars” and the Fray’s “How to Save a Life,” Rhimes pitched the idea to the network — but, in a surprising first, she was told that they were going to pass.

Rhimes: By that point, I wasn’t getting notes on anything; nobody was saying no to me about anything. So it was really bizarre to me that there was all this resistance to doing a musical episode. And I remember somebody at the network saying, “Can’t you just do one of your love-triangle thingies again?” And I thought, my head’s gonna explode, because the show is not a bunch of “love-triangle thingies.” You guys have missed the point entirely. I felt like, no, every year of the show is a completely different show, and this year the show has a musical episode. And that’s the story.

McKidd (Dr. Owen Hunt): Tony, Joan, and Shonda basically said to us, “We are trying to convince Disney to give us actual money to do this musical episode, and we feel like we want to do a show-and-tell to show them what this musical episode could be. Are you guys willing to give your time to help us create this show-and-tell?” And we were like, “Yeah, of course.”

Wilson: So we gave them a concert. Sara, Kevin McKidd, and I, along with musicians, got together, and we performed this script that Shonda and Tony Phelan put together. Shonda did the narrating. And we went through what the entire episode would be, based on those iconic songs.

McKidd: I remember Sandra Oh came to the concert for the execs just to be moral support for us. And she became like our groupie — she would stand and cheer and whoop and holler in between all the songs.

Phelan (writer, producer, director, and co-showrunner): Once [the executives] saw it, and saw it could work, then they gave us the okay to do it.

Rhimes: I still feel like they thought we were crazy. But you couldn’t deny the talent in the room.

Getting the Cast on Board

Once the episode was greenlit, the team began the task of persuading a cast full of non-singers to simultaneously sing, act, and — in some cases — dance on screen.

Wilson: The offer was put out on the table from the beginning from Shonda — anybody that’s not interested in singing, you’re not required; you don’t have to do it.

Rater: I think Sandra from the beginning was like, nope.

Rhimes: She looked at me — it was her very deadpan face — and she was like, “I’m not singing.” And I was like, okay! If that’s not your thing, that is not your thing — that’s completely okay. And it didn’t feel like she was afraid to sing or push past this barrier. It felt like Cristina Yang doesn’t sing. And that made sense to me.

Rater: Ellen [Pompeo] has a great voice. She could’ve done more. ... Ellen was very gracious about, like, “I’ll doo-wop in the back; don’t worry about me. Let’s hear Chandra, let’s hear Sara, this is theirs.”

Capshaw (Dr. Arizona Robbins): In addition to Sara having this powerhouse voice, she was always very generous about others and never made anyone feel smaller because of her giant power. But singing with her was like, “Aw, man [laughs], how about you get this one? You got this leg of the race.”

Wilson: Probably the most frightened person was Kim Raver, bless her heart.

Raver (Dr. Teddy Altman): It was super-exciting and terrifying at the same time. We all love singing, but unless you’re Sara Ramirez or Chandra Wilson.

Dane (Dr. Mark Sloan): I don’t fancy myself a singer, so I said, “Shonda, in this particular episode, I want the least amount of lines.”

Rhimes: Eric Dane surprised me, because his voice had this lovely quality to it that was really nice.

Dane: I set her up for a catastrophe, so she had very low expectations.

Starting Rehearsals

For months leading up to the episode, the cast embarked on a grueling series of rehearsals and voice lessons, adding hours onto their already long daily schedules.

Capshaw: I had just had a baby, and I was really taking my life one day at a time. I knew it was going to be a big episode, but, timeliness-wise, it was a tough time. I think I was still breast-feeding.

Phelan: Usually in the writers’ room, you’ve got maybe six-to-eight weeks from the time you come up with an idea to the time that it’s shot. This we needed almost the entire season to plan for.

Raver: It was like riding a bike but then adding, like, six more wheels to it, and you had to kind of figure it out.

Capshaw: We were all bringing our A games. In normal days, it feels like there’s a familiarity, you can feel a little more casual, a little more off-the-cuff, but there was nothing off-the-cuff about this. It was all very high stakes because it was life or death, literally.

There were some silver linings, though.

Dane: We had these little earbuds in our ears, I guess like how you film musicals, so you can sync what you’re mouthing with the music in your ear. And so I went to the sound operator and said, “I can buy one of these earbuds, right? And I can create a content-receiver pack and connect it to an iPod and pipe music into this too theoretically, yes?” And he said, “Yeah, you could do that if you want to.” So I said, “So when I’m performing surgery in later episodes on this show, and I don’t have very many lines, theoretically I could be listening to music, and nobody would know?” And he said, “Yeah, theoretically, that would work.” So I had one made, and I shot many episodes in the surgical theater, sometimes with lines, listening to music, many times.

Filming the Episode

“Song Beneath the Song” revolved largely around the seriousness of Callie’s condition, but there were also some light moments, including a sexy, dance-filled take on “Running on Sunshine” featuring several of the show’s couples.

Capshaw: When Sara and I are in the car in the clouds — oh my god, I’ve never felt so goofy in my life [laughs].

Raver: Scott Foley [who played Teddy’s love interest Henry] and I had so much fun working together. He’s so funny, and so choreographing that dance singing number was really fun.

Wilson: Debbie Allen sent in Eartha Robinson, one of her choreographers from the Debbie Allen Dance Academy, who I knew from Fame, the television series. So this is who was coming in, teaching us how to twirl. And I was like, oh my god, I’m on Fame!

Early in the episode, McKidd’s Owen sing-shouts at his crew of doctors to “calm down” — a moment that, years later, became a widely shared meme for its over-the-top nature.

McKidd: In the scene, I think it was Kate Walsh — she’s brilliant; she’s a prankster — and Patrick and Eric Dane. And they were all arguing. And I’m sitting there and [the cameras] push in on me and I go, “Calm down.” And they couldn’t keep a straight face. Every time we did a take, they just would fall over laughing. And they were on camera giving me the eye line, and I had to sing this song seriously with those two actors just doubled over, like sidesplitting. It just tickled their funny bones so much. That was one of the hardest acting days of my life [laughs].

Capshaw: For sure, many, many, many shots were taken at Kevin McKidd for his “calm down” [laughs]. ... He really took on the rock-&-roll part of it.

McKidd: My daughter, who’s big on Twitter, she said that “calm down” thing’s like a serious meme thing now, which I guess is an honor. I don’t know.

The biggest moment of the hour came at the end, when Ramirez, a Tony winner for Spamalot, sang “The Story” as Callie fought for her life.

Phelan: When Sara came to Grey’s, she had this idea that she absolutely wanted to be known as an actress not a singer. And so for her first couple seasons on the show, she kind of left that side of her behind. Then, here was Shonda and I coming to her and saying, “No, we want to re-engage that part of you and put it on the show.” And so I think that she got nervous about that ... but to hear that amazing, magical voice come out of her ... that was the moment that was going to be able to sustain the music [of the whole episode].

Rhimes: When she sings “The Story,” I mean — I wrote the episode; I know what’s gonna happen. I’ve seen it a thousand times. It has nothing to do with me. But I always tear up a little bit because of her extraordinary voice and extraordinary performance.

Wilson: What a showcase it was for Sara Ramirez. I’m so glad that she got to share that part of herself with our audiences.

Reading Those Reviews

On March 31, 2011, the episode aired. While it garnered strong ratings, viewers’ reactions to “Song Beneath the Song” were mixed.

McKidd: I think we all went into it with our eyes open, and we knew there was gonna be mixed reviews. Because some people are gonna love it, and some people aren’t. But that shouldn’t stop people from taking a few risks in what we do, you know?

Rater: I remember being shocked that there were people who didn’t like it. I was like, come on!

Capshaw: It didn’t feel like [the reviews] were gonna affect anything either way. It wasn’t gonna be like, “Oh my gosh, that was too silly, and I’m never watching Grey’s again.” It had already found its place in people’s hearts.

Rhimes: I learned very quickly [on Grey’s] that if you’re gonna believe the good things people say about you, you have to believe the bad things people say. So there’s no point in paying attention to any of it. ... Nobody’s gonna like everything that you do.

Phelan: I know there are a lot of people who don’t like it, who felt like it bent the show too much, but it’s season 7 of a show, and if you’re not taking big swings when you’re on season 7 on a show, something’s wrong.

Creating a Legacy

Despite the critical reactions, the episode has developed something of a cult following over the years, thanks to live benefits and TikTok memes. A decade later, its creators all look back fondly on the hour and its impact.

Wilson: [The cast] watched it together, and I remember feeling like, wow, look at what we did!

Capshaw: When we showed up to do that benefit concert, I remember coming out onstage ... and being completely, completely overwhelmed with the people that responded to Arizona in that episode, and to the love story between Callie and Arizona.

Phelan: As a director, it was the biggest challenge of my career to do that, and it’s one of the things that I’m most proud of.

Raver: I’ll be in my car singing along, or at work if we’re in the hair-and-makeup trailer and we’re listening to [the soundtrack], it’s just an immediate flashback. It kind of feels like yesterday.

Wilson: The soundtrack is on my playlist on my phone [laughs]. So I will pop that thing out in a minute, because it’s just absolute happy memories.

Rater: If I’m cooking, that is what I put on. That’s what I tell Alexa to play for me.

Rhimes: I feel like that episode just always reminds me of having so much fun. That was what was really great. We had so much fun. And how much do you get to say that about just being at work?

Dane: As a cast, contrary to what some of the entertainment media might have speculated, we were all very close. We all spent a lot of time together, and a lot of that stuff felt really real to us. It was easy to access because of how we felt about each other off screen.

Raver: I just remember it being such an incredible experience, being able to work with all these incredibly talented actors and creators.

Rhimes: It’s right in my top 10 of episodes we’ve ever done.

Dane: I don’t particularly want to do it again, but I’m glad I did it.