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kireiwoo · 4 years

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red, blue, my yellow. [jwy!]

˚➶. EXPO ↓

#𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 bestfriend!woo x fem!reader.

#𝐚𝐛𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭 in which woo is your teasing florist of a friend who can’t seem to pick between red and blue; so you add a third option for him, yellow!

#𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 bf2l, fluff, crack, blasphemy(?), animal death, cursing, 6th grader jokes, two dorks being oblivious, kissing <3

#𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 2.0k+

“Okay, so Sky Blue or Cherry Red?”

“What the fuck? Those are so contrasting.”

Wooyoung whined at your indecisive and absentminded response, leaning his head against your turquoise, sweater-clad shoulder while watching reruns of Scooby-Doo on your old TV. You sipped on the sugarless vanilla latte he purchased for you, relishing in the brief but welcomed warmth the drink radiated in waves. Wooyoung obsessively shoved two paint-cards into your face, gaggling over how bright and saturated they were.

He visited earlier with the guise of simply hanging out with you, claiming that while occupied with his 9-5 job downtown as an optimistic florist, he missed your company. Initially he picked the job because it sounded delicate and comprehensively easy. Objectively, the work was relatively standard; water the daffodils and make sure his small, secret rose garden he called ‘wonderland’ was receiving enough sunlight; but his back ached with hauling boxes filled with seeds and bags packed of faux soil.

“Why are you seriously no help?” He chirped. You grumbled in response, focusing on the graphics of the late television show rather than Wooyoung’s juvenile complaints. Your hair was an unkempt rat’s nest and your spongebob pyjama pants were ruffled considerably, but you allowed Wooyoung into your house regardless of your external appearance. You knew he wouldn’t judge you anyways, too occupied with picking a paint colour for his new apartment.

“How about Sunflower Yellow?” You calmly, dismissively suggested, taking another long swig from the now-empty pale brown paper cup before tossing it behind your couch. You’d clean it up later anyways, but for now you had a whiny best friend to deal with. “Dunno if you’re hard of hearing or colourblind but yellow wasn’t an option.” Wooyoung quipped, his eyes flashing with a teasingly stumped mirth.

“You and I both damn-well know who has the better hearing, and she’s lookin’ right at ya.” Wooyoung giggled at your pouty disposition, finding your blushed cheeks and deep eye-bags adorable. He sat casually against your couch, dressed in his own quirkily mismatched ensemble. A pair of khaki shorts accompanied by a dark green sweatshirt and multicoloured socks, his scuffed three-year-old tennis shoes laying by your door. You found it endearing how Wooyoung still tried to come up with his own fashion trends, ending up looking like a stitched together version of brand-name and value-village. But he was being expressive in the form of seasonal apparel, and you were proud of him.

“Byeol?” He teased, gesturing to your mangy, blue-eyed siamese feline as she sat back and observed your get-together, scattering away once the attention was on her. Wooyoung sighed.

“Look, you chubby-cheeked wench, just answer and I’ll leave you to sleep in your little cocoon of grandma blankets.” You huffed at his insinuation, plonking your deft fingers against his cheek softly and gently.

You met Wooyoung in third grade, when sex didn’t determine friendship and the bounds of society were turned away by your blind infant eyes.

You’d been retrieving wild bluebells and dandelions, bunching them in your sweaty grasp as a sort of dedicated bouquet, explaining to the boisterous boy that you needed to leave it as a parting gift to a squirrel you saw that got run over (you called him Tootles). Looking back, it was innately bizarre how indifferent you were to the concept of death, but Wooyoung supposes that it was a sweet thought anyways. From then on, the two of you blundered together—but part of the reason Wooyoung stayed was also because of his obvious attraction to your lopsided pigtails and thrifted summer dresses. He remembers that you always had a food stain somewhere on your clothing.

Now looking at you, still messy and even more vulgar, he can’t help but think that he doesn’t regret any moments. You’ve gone through everything together; Wooyoung was present for your first period when the stomach pain and hunger cramps were immense, and you were there when his family suffered through a rough patch, assuring him that everything would be okay when in reality, the decision of divorce between his parents was settled a week later. Those were some of his most difficult moments, but he can look back at them fondly only because it brought him closer to you.

“Wench? What are you saying? I’m a god.” You offered in the most dramatized tone you could.

“Might wanna get your facts checked,”

“Might wanna get your mom checked,” You snorted, biting your lip while procuring finger guns just for the hell of it. Wooyoung sighed in mock disappointment, his frizzy purple-tinted fringe falling onto his forehead. You grinned and giggled, catching his attention cutely.

Your whiny puppy rolled his eyes before wailing a cacophony of displeased sounds, loudly filtering his discontentment with having a plain apartment. “(Y/N) you don’t understand the seriousness of my situation! Who wants to tell their grandchildren that their first—that’s right, first!—apartment was a boring cream colour?!” Fed up with his childish bumbling, you quickly smacked his forehead, chuckling quietly as he squeaked and softened his stiff posture. It was honestly so lovable how he got so passionate about the smallest, almost insignificant things.

“Listen, we’ll figure something out. I still think Sunflower Yellow should be an option though.” Wooyoung swatted at your covered tummy with an overzealous and enthusiastic expression, clearly excited with the concept of letting you help him. The soft scent of peppermint-chamomile flooded into your nostrils from his clothing, making you mentally note to ask him what detergent he decided to try. “You think wrong, settler! Now choose between these two colours or I’ll be obligated to steal half of your lifespan.” You laughed loudly at the unprecedented silliness of your best friend, shaking your head while sending a fleeting but absolutely enamoured stare in his direction.

“Honestly, at this point why am I letting you help me?” He hummed. You gurgled at his feigned distress, gasping and tackling him against the couch. You straddled his waist, pointing a manicured figure at his face while you fondly cursed at him. “As I recall, Mr. Jung; you arrived to my residence at exactly 12:01 PM with the excuse to hang out, only to badger me with your issues about... paint colours. You came to me.” Wooyoung sat enthralled by your change in attitude, bathing in the flawlessness of your execution regarding exposing him for his wrongdoings.

“Just boom, bam, pow: There’s that dude I’m in love with.” Wooyoung’s eyes widened considerably, a snarky smirk falling across his countenance as his cheeks devilishly flushed, looking similar to that of a ripened strawberry. Immediately you backtracked, wondering what you said that provoked this reaction, and realization struck across your face like a sharp slap.

Oh shit. Shit.

“I-Uh—you didn’t hear that.” You waved shy but frantic hands into his face, as if hypnotizing him into forgetting about your embarrassingly personal confession. But all he did was giggle and take ahold of your wrists, pulling your body forward so you were chest to chest with him.

A soft, addictingly brief kiss was placed against your creased forehead, the perfect lips of your best friend brushing against your heated skin. You swallowed thickly, placing your hands over his sweater-clad chest with confusion written all over your face. What in the hell kind of reaction was this—? Whatever it was, it was warm and delicate and felt right.

Then again, there’s nothing that ever feels wrong when it comes to Jung Wooyoung. Or maybe that’s just you.

“Y’know, you’re not very... secretive.” He settled, making perplexities skip through your mind like stones on water. Had he known? Was this the end of your life-long friendship? Questions ran through your mind endlessly, your heart rapidly beating and mind berating you for admitting your tini-tiny, small-as-a-planet crush. “I had my suspicions but you actually saying it was my sweet confirmation.”

“The fuck? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I-I—Hey! Don’t be angry at me!” He pouted, melting your heart into a pile of mushy and fragmented puddles. “What I was trying to say is, I love you too.” Immediately your face blanched and you dropped your head into the crook of Wooyoung’s neck, appreciating the small dust of red that decorated his ears. You simply couldn’t face him in fear that this was all a simulation; a seemingly harmless gaffe constructed firstly to tease you, and knowing Wooyoung with his wildly oblivious tendencies and boyish lack of empathy, you had no doubt that it was something he would try.

And yet, you couldn’t even force yourself to be angry at him. Because while you speculated that he was joking, somewhere in your heart you knew that he was being honest—simply in denial with the prospect of your long-lasting crush actually returning your feelings. “Hello? Earth to (Y/N)? Airhead? Loafer?” You snapped out of your reverie, staring at Wooyoung’s pinked face as his prying eyes drifted around your facial features, slowly tracing each detail.

“You love me too?” Shock ever-present, you searched in Wooyoung’s loving gaze for some kind of testimony, a confirmation, for some truth to be shed. And when all you could see were the glimmering, almost glowing sparkles in his large pupils, you felt the slightest bit reassured.

“Of course I do, bean!”

“As a friend though, right?” Wooyoung’s face screwed into an intense concentration, expression looking fragile and breakable. But in his wandering mind, he questioned how you could even consider that. He loved you as something more—with your tangled tresses and wrinkled clothes, even down to the fact that you couldn’t handle sugar but grimaced every time you drank your vanilla lattes, simply because they weren’t sweet enough.

It was the little things that he found himself so affectionately obsessed with. He remembers your bleached sundresses in elementary and how you couldn’t tie your shoes without help from a teacher. How you loathed wearing glasses because you thought they made you look nerdy, but complained because you just couldn’t see.

“Jesus Christ, Loser. No, I love you like... like a crush! Yeah, like a crush. Romantically.” He gushed, and if this wasn’t one of the most immature confessional moments in history, it sure was a cheesy one.

“Wait, really? You like-like me?” Good god. Your fingers trembled and lips twitched.

“Yes, how many times do I—” Wooyoung breathed out a shaky sigh as you leaned forward and smoothly took his lips with your own. He tasted minty and sweet, like petals and chocolate. His eyes fluttered closed as your lips meshed together, pushing against each other in a romantic twine of burning passion.

Suddenly, your hands were on either side of his head and one of his deft, spidering hands pressed onto the small of your back. The other hand trailed up to the back of your neck, twirling the loose strands of hair at your nape, his tongue breaching the space between your lips invasively—but then he tried to card his fingers through your hair; and you hissed and pulled away like a disenchanted cat, baring your teeth from the unprecedented pain.

“Shit! Sorry, baby.” Whereas your head flooded with spiking pains from small hairs being plucked, your heart was palpitating at the new but definitely embraced pet-name. “I told you that you should’ve washed your hair! But someone doesn’t like listening!” You tutted at the nagging, harrumphing before placing another complacent kiss against his lips.

“Oh shut up, Mr. I can’t choose between red and blue.” You never thought you’d get the chance to tease Wooyoung after directly smooching him; it was a fantasy and a reoccurring fever dream to feel his plush, pillowed lips against your own. Perhaps a perverse imaginative scenario, but it was a reality now. And reality suddenly didn’t seem so harsh; crowded in the warm arms of a starry-eyed shortie with calloused hands and a knack for gardening.

“You’re right, I can’t. But it’s okay, I prefer yellow anyways.”

Who knows what awaits you in life? Maybe the sky will drain of it’s blue and the roses will deplete of their red—but no matter the changes and disparities that occur over the years, there’s always one thing that you’re forever sure of:

“You’re my yellow, Jung Wooyoung.”

#ateez x reader #ateez smut #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez scenarios #ateez reaction #ateez wooyoung #jung wooyoung #wooyoung smut #wooyoung fluff #wooyoung angst #wooyoung reactions #wooyoung scenarios #wooyoung x reader #ateez oneshot #wooyoung #jwy : youngie.#80’s!

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shigarakitomura · 6 years

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hey sky, any recommendations which dnpgames videos are the happiest? i just had a huge argument with my boyfriend and all my friends keep advising me to break up with him but i really don't wanna think about it before the exam i have tomorrow so i need a distraction,,,,,,

oh :( im sorry hun, ill do my best

first off all of the golf vids. thats it just watch those if u dont even crack a smile ill b surprised theyre just so funny n dnp had so much fun making innuendoes in those vids bc theres,,,,way too many possibilities

the drumming one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dj2_M-t0TsI

the anime bucket of doom https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pp2JMSnCmTc

all the google feud vids (the newest one is my favorite)

mounting some men https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0lzhdzr12M bc they gay

cards against humanity if only for the fact that phil looks like a goddamned angel confirmed https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cGHUQXW0hq4

either of the charades videos

the truth bombs vids (the one with pj is my fav but the other one is rlly good too)

possibly just bc im a ,,,demon, ,,but this stream https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tiM0hJOONs&t=87s

bloopers hgnhdlfjhdf https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17RMPZEShbg

the fortnite video oh my god https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPkU6eD4U4k

the licking nintendo cartridges bc they didnt have to but they ,,did https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZrfYgwVifE

whos ur daddy , that was my favorite dnp vid for the longest time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V94we7L84YI

any of the press the button vids

the spongebob slenderman vid!!! love her! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiPMMl-Lwak

the shopping simulator video,,,,,,,,,u mean the funniest video on the planet https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OhEy8cCCa5w

dnp play five nights at freddys 4 again is one of my fav vids on their whole channel i think https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7w7hRH2Xk_g (honestly any of the fnaf vids of theirs are great)

the mario karts vids, like the streams and shit

THE YASUHATI VIDEOS ARE THE BEST THINGS THAT GOD (PHIL) EVER BLESSED US WITH

the minecraft vid,, painful to watch as someone who played minecraft for years but so fun to laugh at them for https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDXf9Rw4iBU

all of phils solo shelter vids (also the one dan played)

dans solo outlast vid which is still prolly in my top 15 fav gaming vids and that was like one of the first ones i watched https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8DeO117qb0&t=561s

and the mortal combat vid which is like Cute https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IBvGN07dbs

#i worked backwards n picked out my favs can u tell #i hope these make u feel better :( dnp always help me feel good when im having a bad day #anonymous #asks

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jeessss · 3 years

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I posted 1,277 times in 2021

285 posts created (22%)

992 posts reblogged (78%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 3.5 posts.

I added 96 tags in 2021

#31 nights of dnp - 33 posts

#i laughed - 13 posts

#fics by me - 10 posts

#oh - 10 posts

#amazing - 8 posts

#i love - 6 posts

#anyway - 6 posts

#long post - 4 posts

#it’s just - 3 posts

#god - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#if a nuclear war started i’d have had no idea as long as it didn’t happen on a particular stretch of road between oklahoma and pennsylvania

My Top Posts in 2021

how do you think phil explained himself to the electrician. oh sorry, i thought you were my [insert noun here]

136 notes • Posted 2021-11-11 17:47:35 GMT

what if we 😳 touched cakes 🙈 on the train ride to your home town 🙊😳💕💗

179 notes • Posted 2021-11-18 17:40:30 GMT

dan is also mr. amazing, kind of when you think about it

180 notes • Posted 2021-08-11 21:47:46 GMT

31 Nights of DnP 1. The Super Amazing Project - Bloody Mary, KRISTEN STEWART SMILING OMFG 2. Halloween Baking: Brownie Graveyard! 3. Dan and Phil Play FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY’S 4. I AM GOD - Sonic.exe 5. Dan Plays OUTLAST (alone in the dark) 6. Dan and Phil Play SLENDER 7. Halloween Baking - SPOOKY CUPCAKES 8. Dan and Phil Play FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY’S 4 AGAIN 9. SCARY SEXUAL HEDGEHOGS - Sally.exe 10. Dan and Phil play CAN YOUR PET? 11. Dan and Phil play P.T (Silent Hills) 12. DIL GETS SPOOKY - Dan and Phil Play: Sims 4 #21 13. Halloween Baking - PUMPKIN SPICE PUMPKIN COOKIES 14. Dan and Phil Play FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY’S SISTER LOCATION 15. TRILOGY OF TERROR - Dan and Phil play: Sonic 2.exe 16. Dan and Phil play OUTLAST 2! (TERRIFYING) 17. CREEPY DOLL ATTACK - Dan and Phil Play: Timore INFERNO 18. CHILDHOOD RUINED - Dan and Phil Play: SPONGEBOB SLENDERPANTS 19. Halloween Baking - MONSTER POPS! 20. NEVER SLEEPING AGAIN - Dan and Phil play: Little Nightmares 21. THE JUMPSCARE SHOWDOWN - Dan vs. Phil: Hide and Shriek 22. THE SCARIEST SPORT - Dan and Phil play: Golf With Friends #4 23. Dan and Phil vs. JASON - Friday the 13th! 24. ACTUALLY HORRIFYING - Dan and Phil play: The Evil Within 2 25. Halloween Baking - Creepy Crispy Cakes CONJOINED CHALLENGE! 26. SPOOKY WEEK BEGINS! Dan and Phil Play: GRANNY 27. The Creepy Mind of Phil Lester 28. It’s All Ogre for Dan and Phil - SWAMP SIMULATOR! 29. DIL BECOMES A VAMPIRE - Dan and Phil Play: Sims 4 #57 30. Dan experiences VR Horror - Resident Evil 7! 31. Dan and Phil try PUMPKIN CARVING!

182 notes • Posted 2021-09-28 00:06:48 GMT

[redacted]

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #fine i will post it #i really do not tag things it’s fine #the number one post doesn’t exist i am blocking it from my brain i have never been wrong in my entire life #oh also #i have only had this account since july so multiply everything by two or whatever

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petergriffinhateblog-blog · 7 years

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do you have any issues with any other cartoon dads? Like Stan Smith, Bob Blecher, Homer Simpson, or even like Jerry Smith

i have been waiting for this question

stan smith?? i can’t answer that. i don’t know enough about him to, and i even had to google his name just to figure out who he was. ??/10 also he’s apparently from american dad, so like.. that’s a thing i guess.

bob belcher? good dad. could be better, but he’s not fucking abusive and he does the best he can for his family. he seems to genuinely love both his wife and his children, and the antics that happen don’t end up directly due to his haphazardly reckless personality like Someone We Will Not Name. 9/10

homer simpson? i don’t know how to feel about him. i know enough, but... he’s still fucked up bart with the physical abuse. he hasn’t fucked up NEARLY to the Family Man’s degree, but the constant choking of bart isn’t good. though... he does seem to be supporting of their hobbies. there’s actually an episode (link, BUT READ THE REST OF THIS PARAGRAPH BEFORE U WATCH SO U KNO THE WARNINGS) where bart gets sent to Hell School (like a literal school in hell) and... fits in there?? and does good on his grades?? and both homer and marge are very supportive of it, to the point where the ‘final test’ or whatever for bart is to.. torture homer, and he’s okay with it!! he wants bart to succeed enough that he’s willing to go through physical pain and literal torture by his own son’s hand just for that to happen!!!!!

homer’s a flawed man and has Definitely made some mistakes, but i think his intentions are noble and he Does wish the best for his kids. he actually has a shot of bart forgiving him, or even keeping him within his life once he becomes an adult. 5.5/10 (or 6.5/10 on good episodes)

jerry smith from rick and morty? uhhhhh... he’s... i guess he’s a dad. he’s not.. a Good dad.. but he’s not really a bad one either. he wants morty and summer to stay out of harm’s way, which is good, but... he’s kind of a pansy. the only time he really steps up to the bill is in the cronenberg universe, which means that it takes Very Severe Circumstances just for him to actually do something. he supports summer in her weird Floating Head Religion, he wants morty to get a proper education and stay out of trouble, and his worst qualities are that he’s Fucking Annoying and kinda selfish, though neither of these traits have really put the children in harm’s way.

good person? no. he’s kind of a failure/bum/dropout dad in every sense of the manner. but good dad? yea, i don’t think he’s done anything wrong. 8/10, or 7 cause maybe i’m forgetting something? anyway he’s pretty high up there concerning his kids.

and here’s some other dads:

nigel thornerry from the wild thornberries. good dad. kinda oblivious and ignorant, but he’s probably the best goddamn dad on here. 10/10. good dad.

paul blart from paul blart mall cop 2, specifically. i haven’t seen the first one, just the second. he’s.. a wreck. the whole movie is a wreck. he spends like half the movie trying to make his daughter give up her dream college, and he is a helicopter dad who doesn’t want her doing anything without him knowing Exactly What It Is. luckily, there’s no consistency in here, so these things get fixed. 4/10, you can tell they’re acting out the relation and not actually parent/child.

goku from dragon ball z? 0/10. -1/10. bad dad. bad man. is there a hate blog for him yet? fuck goku. i mean.. ok, for those of you who don’t know, it’s apparently heavily implied throughout the manga that he’s from that goku only fights people because he’s just.. REALLY INTO FIGHTING. he doesn’t give a good god damn about the earth or his friends or whatever, not beyond.. them being his friends. it’s a canon thing he doesn’t experience the feeling of “love”, and just accepted chichi’s proposal cause she’s pretty and asked first and also makes good food. he’s a pretty nice/chill dude, but... he’s not a good dad.

piccolo from dbz. ???????? 2/10. better than goku, but that’s not saying much. what the fuck stop throwing gohan at rocks.

vegeta from dbz. i dont remember how he is as a dad but i remember a comic of trunks giving him a cup that says “worlds okayest dad” and that’s canon as far as i’m concerned. okayest/10

professor utonium from ppg. i haven’t seen the reboot so don’t ask me about that, after the transphobic episode i don’t wanna hear it. from the OLD series, though?? he was a good dad. he was up there with nigel on Best Dads. 9/10 he gets a point off because he doesn’t know the extent of the girls’ powers nor does he seem to care to??? which is a big flaw to me. if my kids had magic powers, i’d go out of my goddamn way to see their limits so i can make enhancements for them. he’s a scientist who built them a giant robot why can’t he build other, minor shit for them too..

mr krabs from spongebob? fuck you. 4/10 because you’re higher than goku, peter, and piccolo, but you just pay off your daughter to not be annoying. what the fuck

mufasa from lion king. he’s... uh. 9/10. he tries, he’s a pretty good dad. he’s just not around that long?? but i mean. he died saving his kid. that’s pretty damn good dadding skills.

everyone from the Dad Dating Simulator gets a collective 8/10. they’re all pretty ok. amanda’s really cute, i cried a few times gazing upon her. please support her, she deserves it.

count dracula from hotel transylvania... 7/10. very sheltering, but he means well. at least.. in the first movie? i don’t think i watched the second one.

mr turner. 6/10. he gets pity points, timmy turner is like 50 and yet pretends to be like 10. mr turner has to be exhausted. he’s a good dad despite being stuck in literal parenting hell. as much as you love your kid, being stuck in the same year over and over with your son being Pretty Much The Most Selfish God Ever is... kinda awful.

im missing a bunch of dads but it’s also 4:30 AM and i have been answering this question for the past like.. hour and a half. i’m tired. i need my strength.

#long post #fuck you goku #fuck you peter griffin #dad rankings #anonymous #peter griffin hate mail

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