#god we just got puns up the butt today yall

[jootsmcgoots]

The Bright Side, Chapter 1: Bloom Effect (Abbacchio x GN!Reader) SFW

This was the 2nd fic I wrote, and in a way it was kind of a continuation of my first Abbacchio fic. However, I ended up choosing to make it a gender neutral reader instead of a female reader because I ended up noticing that I never did use pronouns in this fic.

So my rationale was like “Hey if I don’t use pronouns, I may as well make it a GN fic because then anyone can enjoy it.”

However this of course does not exempt anyone from the punnery LMAO

Anyways. I wrote this one because my friends were like “hey wouldn’t it be great if abbacchio were also good at puns because he seems like the sharp type”

and i was like “holy fuck i’d just fall in love with him even more. i’d have to propose on the spot.”

And so I wrote this LOL

This is a two-parter, so I’ll post the second chapter in a hot minute.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Genre: Fluff (with a pinch of spice)

Word count:  1962

Summary: Abbacchio constantly calls your jokes stupid, but it turns out he has a talent for them too.

And really, when your (overly serious) significant other can rattle out some real dumb jokes at the same rate (if not faster than) you do, how can you NOT fall deeper in love with them?

Chapters: 1 / 2

Chapter 1: Bloom Effect

AO3 Link!

“Leo---”

“No.”

“But I haven’t ev---”

“No.”

The two of you had been laying together on your shared bed. Set to a low volume, music was playing on the radio in the background as you both just enjoyed your day together, no missions or any gang business going on. You had been propped up against Abbacchio’s chest and idly reading a book and just enjoying his quiet company while he would occasionally read over your shoulder and make a comment about the story, prompting some conversation before you both settled back into reading quietly. You both liked it like this; even if you were the more talkative and outgoing of the two, that didn’t mean you didn’t enjoy quiet time, especially when it was with him.

But of course, that didn’t stop you from being a little shit with him. Like the joke you had just made about him “taking a page from your book” (which earned a groan), and then telling him you knew he’d react like that because you could “read him like a book” (which in turn elicited a disgruntled “Really?” while you snickered in amusement).

After he had cut you off for the second time, you made a pouting noise and puffed your cheeks out as you rolled onto your stomach to face him. “You’re no fun.” You said that, but it was no secret that you loved his reactions (after all, why would you bother him so often?), as your face displayed a sunny, shit-eating grin.

“And you’re always so grumpy,” you added. At that, you sat up and began to poke at his face, using your index fingers to push the corners of his lips into a forced smile, pressing his cheeks higher up on his face. “Lighten up!” You giggled at the sight of his mouth being pulled into such an exaggeratedly happy expression, while his eyes and brow both communicated sullen annoyance. If it had been anyone else, Abbacchio may have swatted their fingers off of his face, much less even let them touch him like this. For you, he tolerated the gesture.

And anyways, it was no secret that he loved your smile.

He took your wrists into his hands and removed your fingers from his face. “I can be plenty of fun,” he replied in that gruff tone of his. “It’s just that your jokes are always so stupid.”

“You love them.”

“I don’t.”

“You love me.”

He removed his hands from your wrists and into your hands, holding them gently.

“I do.”

You flushed slightly and chuckled fondly as you settled fully onto his lap. “I knew it.”

“Don’t push it.”

But now he was smiling, even if just a tiny bit, and you knew you had won. You laughed softly and pressed your forehead against his. Abbacchio closed his eyes into the gesture, a more prominent smile forming on his features. You lifted away from his forehead, then leaned back in to press a little kiss to his cheek once, then twice. Moving from his cheek, you gave him a peck on his nose that earned you a pleased hum. Then, slowly, your lips captured his in a gentle kiss that he reciprocated with a contented sigh that was so soft that you almost didn’t notice it.

Once you separated from him, you couldn’t help but give him a small but cheeky smile. “Even so, you really could stand to lighten up, you know…” you said, trying to get a rise out of him. “You’re still such a grump.” You pressed another kiss to his cheek. “But don’t worry. I still love you.”

Abbacchio ‘hmph’-ed before locking eyes with you. You blinked and chuckled, tilting your head at him. “What? You gonna throw me somewhere again?”

He shook his head ‘no’. Instead, he gathered up the crumpled blanket from the foot of the bed and tossed it onto you as you squawked in surprise as you were suddenly enveloped in cotton and down. “My apologies for being such a wet blanket.”

You blinked from underneath the blanket. Did Abbacchio make…a pun? Peeking your head out from underneath your soft and downy prison, disbelief painted your features as you blinked a couple of more times before starting to smile widely. The grin on Abbacchio’s face was smug, quite gratified that he had managed to shut you up.

“Best cover up your mouth, amore. You’ll let flies in.” He punctuated his point by bringing up a corner of the blanket over your mouth.

“Ha! Haha! Oh my God!” You practically jumped up and squealed in delight, pulling the blanket around your shoulders. “That’s hilarious! I had no idea you were capable of such punnery! Leone! Holy shit!” Giggling, you clapped your hands in pure mirth as you began to sit up on your knees.

Abbacchio quirked his eyebrow at you, expression neutral again, and said in a completely serious and even tone, “Don’t you mean holy sheet?”

If you had thought it was impossible for your expression to become even more shocked (while still entirely delighted), you were quickly proven wrong as you felt your mouth gape further. “Pff! Hehe…! Ahaha!” You had thrown your head back and started laughing uncontrollably, feeling tears forming in your eyes. At this point, your stomach had hurt from all the laughing and you doubled over with a soft thump onto the bed, still rolling around and convulsing with laughter.

You weren’t quite sure what was funnier: the fact that Abbacchio was delivering these jokes with the same solemn expressions he wore during meetings or mission briefings, the speed at which he came up with these puns, or the very fact that it was Leone Abbacchio, big angry serious goth man with a stick up his ass so big that it may as well have been a tree, making silly, stupid puns with you.

And God did you love him all the more for it.

Once you had caught your breath and wiped the tears from your eyes, you peered up at him from your laying position, the blanket snugly wrapped around you. “Whew…haha! I can’t believe you came up with those so quickly! That was great! You’re just great! I swear, I find something about you that makes me love you more and more every day.” A realization seemed to cross your face as you looked up at him with what seemed like reverence. “Oh man, Leone, I love you. Aha! Holy shit, I love you so much! Did you know that?” You gave a breathy kind of laugh as you rolled onto your side. “Let me show you just how much! If you know what I mean.” You wiggled your eyebrows suggestively at him and proceeded to wiggle around in the blanket, having entrapped yourself further during your fits of laughter. “Just. Just gimme a second.”

Your advances made Abbacchio snort out a short laugh that he couldn’t repress. You weren’t really the definition of “sultry” and “seductive” at the moment, all rolled up in a blanket like a human burrito. It would be the first time he was ever propositioned by what looked like a sentient cannolo. One that threw him bedroom eyes and looked at him like he was the answer to all of life’s questions and beheld him as such.

Your boyfriend just watched you as you tried to worm your way out of the blankets and your pants simultaneously. He was about to comment that it might be easier if you tackled one problem at a time, but by then you had managed to roll right off of the bed and you hit the ground with a muted thump and an “oof!” that was soon followed by some startled laughter.

He shook his head at the sight and sighed out, “You’re such an idiot. How you made it this long is beyond me.” Resting his elbow on his knee and bringing his knuckles against his lips, Abbacchio remained sitting on the bed as he observed you trying to recollect yourself, struggling a bit on the floor to no avail. Though he knew you were too busy fighting the blanket to see him properly, he still chose to hide the rather large grin and fast-growing blush that was forming on his face. At your ungraceful but earnest outburst of love, his heart swelled in a way that he hadn’t felt in a very long time. He could feel not only his cheeks but also his ears burning up with a flush that betrayed his attempts to bite back the sappy and equally-in-love grin on his face.

Leone Abbacchio’s heart did not flutter or other silly things like that; he was no longer some inexperienced greenhorn, no longer a bright-eyed young man with glittering eyes. No, he was a grown man, hardened and embittered by the darkness in the world around him, dammit! There was no way he was feeling like a schoolboy who had received his first love letter! And yet here he was, with his heart pounding against his chest at a thunderous tempo that was absolutely impossible to ignore and a warmth that was so hot and bright that he felt like he was going to explode from sheer happiness.

You loved him. You loved him to the point of bursting. He could hear it in the unspoken quality of your words, see it in the flashes of light in your eyes, and felt it from the bottom of his heart in the upward curve of your smile.

A deeper, buried part of Abbacchio hoped you knew that he loved you that much too. Maybe even more so. He really, really hoped you knew. For now, though…

“There! I’m---WHOA!” The moment you freed yourself from your fleecy confines, you found yourself entangled in yet another set of confines. Abbacchio had gotten to his feet and hoisted you up and into his arms. Finding yourself underneath his intense stare and suddenly so close, you squirmed a little as a familiar heat stirred within you. It wasn’t as if you weren’t used to this sort of closeness; he just had a look on his face like he was ready to devour you whole.

As if to make good on your assessment, Abbacchio caught your lips in a kiss that started out chaste enough before it began to deepen, a sweep of his tongue over yours turning the words on your lips into soft, unintentional moans. He pulled back to look into your eyes, now half-lidded and entranced, and smiled at you with a vulnerability he reserved only for a select few.

And then he dropped you back onto the bed. A noise of surprise left your mouth as you landed on the mattress, bouncing slightly. Regaining your bearings, you chuckled, “And here I thought you were going to throw me anywhere today.”

“I didn’t throw you this time.”

You rolled your eyes and were about to retort, when you were greeted with the sight of Abbacchio pulling his shirt off of himself. As his long hair fell back into place, you drew a breath at the sight of the silver threads settling over his toned shoulders and chest. Light filtering in from the crack in the curtains made him seem all the more ethereal and mesmerizing to you in this moment. Catching you staring, Abbacchio smirked in a way that seemed equal parts loving and wolfish. “Well, cara? Weren’t you going to show me just how much you love me?”

Your blinked, his words calling you back into the very beautiful reality in front of you, and then you grinned widely at him. Bringing your hand to your forehead in a mock salute, you chirped eagerly, “Si, signore!”