#gonna cry myself to sleep tonight

[sheltoner]

this girl can’t go to the fair with me screaming crying falling to my knees

[whattheresidentdidtoday]

Summertime Sadness - 4/18/23

Went to get my helix downsized today and talked to the piercer about what's involved in getting into piercing. She said she'd love to apprentice me, which is cool. Talked about her experience with the guy she apprenticed from, and how he didn't teach her that much so she kinda ended up teaching herself with practice and a lot of youtube videos.

She'll have to check if she's able to yet, but she's down to teach me. Told me to do research on some things, and then get back to her, I guess if I'm not squicked out by all the info (doubt I will be).

Annnnd, the bf. The inspiration behind the title. Idk if we're making it to the end of next month. Ever since he was fired he's been noncommunicative with me, idk why because he doesn't tell me what's wrong. Claims things are rocky between us...like just because it's harder for us to see each other doesn't mean it's "rocky".

And I try, I send texts. So many in a row I get annoyed at myself for having 4 texts to his 1. And I'm tired...tired of the one sided conversation, of being ignored and feeling like he's discarding me, tired of being the only one seeming to put in effort to keep the relationship going.

He used to claim he liked me, a lot. But he's not acting like it now. Not treating me like it. I've been crying myself to sleep and being mopey, it feels like I'm going through a break-up that hasn't explicitly happened.

He needs to decide if he still wants me or not. And then act accordingly. I can't keep waiting around for the crumb of affection. It's hurting me, and I need to protect myself, much as I loathe the idea of parting ways...

[afoolishpoet]

when you realize you'll never have a desi high school farewell in your life like your brother did and now you're feeling feelings:

[theswifterhood]

i need good audio of the other side of the door now so i can cry over this loss

[phenikas]

I am literally missing 5 crafting metals to get that stupid Mirage skin, why must life be so cruel

[faunrasthewinterelf]

Haha, Im in danger :)

[theroadgetshard]

I really don’t know what to say right now… this was supposed to be my first Taylor show ever

[saturnsfallen]

nah MHA is ending too fast✋😭

[starmocha]

I shouldn't have let you see me like this.

[pinkapyhnx]

Just finished Good omens S2

‘That’s the point.No Nightingales”

[brandogenius]

i’m still so happy about the boys winning their grammys i don’t think i’ll EVER GET OVER IT celebration time all day

[whattheresidentdidtoday]

Life Is Uncertain, Eat Dessert First 3/18/23

So uh.....

I dunno what I'm doing with my life anymore. After a couple days of video orientation at the new job, I did some thinking and concluded that it was more than what I'd initially expected. And I don't feel prepared for it. So I ended up letting them know and passed on it. And now I have a week left at the job and then....the gaping chasm of the unknown called unemployment.

I'm wanting to maybe find a part time job, and then be getting my own lil business up and going and flourishing. I've wanted to be self employed for years (before it was trendy and cool), and maybe now is the time to actually follow through. Not sure what I'll do though, I don't particularly feel like I have a talent at anything.

Maybe try tufting, since that's trending and you can bring in the big bucks from commissions. Or maybe learn to sew and then do stuff like reusable grocery bags, clutches for like bridesmaid gifts, apron/hotpad sets, stuff like that. I do have some things I've thrifted with reselling them in mind (don't come at me for it. I see it as the store got their money, it goes to a good cause - the homeless mission - and now I can get a living from it). But with prices being jacked up even in thrift stores idk how long I'd be able to keep it up.

Anywho...this might turn from a work blog to a "come with me as I figure things out" blog, sorry in advance.

Small joys from this past week: I got a helix piercing the same day I handed in my two weeks. Hurt, but it looks cute. I also got some cuttings off my pilea plant, hoping they don't die and I'll have lil babies to gift to someone :)

[f1reakingout]

atle🥺

[inky-evergreen]

Just now realized since the clone high reboot got cancelled that means Frida and Gandhi would never get the chance to be silly goobers together I'm going to commit massive war crimes

[stretch-time]

Oh I need part 5 fix it fics like NOW

[invertedspoon]

just finished the Bedtime Story quest and YES i had no idea what they were talking about and YES i did leave sobbing crying screaming and felt like i was going to throw up

LIKE WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT. WOAH. HOLY MOLY. WOWIE.