#gonorrhea and hoe

[balladofthe101st]

can't believe that they said bill and toye were besties in ep 7 and had them interact in only two episodes! i just know they caused trouble back in basic training and made a mess of london and paris with their weekend passes

[theehorsepusssy]

dear mr.horsepussy,

I caught chlamydia from this 19 year old wannabe bi sexual. I'm pretty sure it was him bc the last 2 guys I let raw me were clean and I foolishly assumed just bc he was deflowered a weeks ago, he wouldn't have anything and now peeing hurts. at least I got doxycycline for the treatment but I'm scared that I might have something else that the urgent care clinic I went to wouldn't have the means to test for (they just test for trich, gonorrhea and chlamydia) my hoe hubris has come, do you have any words of advice???

Uh ok. I'm not the best example in this area. I never paid attention to any of this and I like had AIDS and diabetes and herpes and shit for who knows how many years until I almost died on the couch cuz I never once went to a regular doctor. I always went to Emergency Rooms and then skipped out on the bill for decades. I don't think you can do that anymore cuz hospitals send everything to collections now and I don't think they do VD shit unless it's like monkey pox making your dick fall off. You think you got any of the Heps or Aids, I'd seek out Planned Parenthood or maybe an Aids charity and they know where to direct you on the cheap and preferably anonymous so the local health department doesn't fuck with you. I'm sure a private diagnostic lab could run a panel if you are rich or have insurance.

Again I'm not the best person to dole out health advice so don't sue me if something falls off. Good luck!

[nishloves]

no bcs I'm so exhausted for no reason—

one of my friends called me and he said that he caught something (idk what) and fr I was like "you caught gonorrhea? oh my, did you take antibiotics?"

no bcs, he ain't even sexually active because he has no hoes and second of all, why the hell would you take anti-biotics for gonorrhea??? (you really should contact a medical professional for it) and it doesn't end here!

"did you get a pediatrician to check you?" WHY WOULD AN 18/19 YEAR OLD BOY GO TO A PEDIATRIC??

he's like, "no- you're wrong-"

I'm like, "dw man, it happens, we are people alright? take your meds for chlamydia." when women are most affected by it!?!? (and antibiotics can be prescribed for chlamydia so that's checks out—)

[spliffymae]

I just finished reading your 'Written Off' mini-series and I just gotta say...

I HOPE TOJI HOE ASS LOSES HIS JOB. I HOPE THAT BITCH CANT FIND EMPLOYMENT. I HOPE THE BOX HE LIVES IN IS SOGGY 25/8. I HOPE YOU FIND OUT THAT RIN AINT YO BABY. SHOKO DONT THINK YO ASS IS OFF THE HOOK. ION GIVE A DAMN IF YOU DIDNT KNOW THAT MAN WAS MARRIED OR NOT. I HOPE YO ASS BREAKS BOTH WRISTS AND CAN NO LONGER WORK AS A DOCTOR STUPID ASS HOE. MEN AINT SHIT AND I HOPE YOU BOTH GET GONORRHEA AND CHLAMYDIA.

you wrote it so well!! it was very captivating and well-written. i can't wait to read more of your work! much love xoxo

LMFAO LISTENNN 😭😭😭

ima start adding “i hope that bitch can’t find employment” in my rotation of insults now. you onto sum w that one!! also you’re the first person to curse shoko !

BUT THANK YOU SM FOR THE FEEDBACK 🥰🫶🏼😘 ILYYYY

[variangetsrawed]

nothing sexy about gonorrhea, wrap that wretched beast up

you heard it here folks wrap it up before you hoe it up

[weenunreleased]

Six Feet Under season 2 predictions in 2024 because I was 2 when it came out:

Ruth's creepy Russian boyfriend will force her to have sex with him to keep her job but she refuses and gets a job elsewhere because she is good at floristry now

The writers completely forget Federico is a homophobe

Billy is only in 3 episodes of season 2 so I think he's gonna have a mild side quest where he struggles to cope with the psychward and just gets crazier. I wanna see some grippy socks in this one.

Brenda is gonna do some life ruining stupid fuck shit idk what

Nate is going to forgive her

Claire's ugly boyfriend gets arrested and sent to juvenile. Unless he's 18 idfk. Then he goes to real jail and gets his toes sucked there.

David puts an end to his hoe streak after encountering a man with either gonorrhea or just an extremely weird fetish.

[ratsoh-writes]

my baby will be a momma's girl and rust wont steal her from me

You and rust are just the side hoes. Sorry gonorrhea

[sin-tentional]

❀ *ﾟ pete davidson. twenty-eight. agender. he/they. bisexual sagittarius. ⇝ looks like skeeter dawson higgins III blew in a week ago and never left. they’ve proven themselves to be brazen & vehement, but being self-pitying & phlegmatic is their downfall. it’s only fitting that take what you want by post malone ft. ozzy & travis scott is playing when they leave their home in salem’s lot. rumor has it that they once contracted gonorrhea from a random groupie on the road, wonder if that’s why the cashier at kum n go gas station and drummer for the vain rogues & the ghost orchestra moved out of their place in orlando, florida. 

ooc // LAST MUSE I SWEAR. I’M GONNA BE HITTING EVENT STARTERS NOW, AND ASSUMING CONNECTIONS AND STUFF, BUT AS ALWAYS HMU IF YOU WANNA PLOT WITH THEM AND WE CAN COME UP WITH EVENT SPECIFIC THREADS IF YOU WANNA ! 💕💕💕💕💕💕

i: aesthetics

spitting dirt while gritting teeth as the mirth and ire creates holes and other cavities to speak broken promises, failed dreams and listless complaining;  broken glass bottles under a pair of trashed converse where the pinky toe sticks out melodying a crunching devil’s dance ; a possessive and slightly angry reminder that it’s bros before hoes in every sense of the sentiment ; ripped jeans from jumping fences and outgrowing the past where the fraying is long overdue for patching over but it works ; smoke rings spiraling over a clouded mess of worries as he rides in the passenger seat with the cool and violent air beating against his knuckles. 

ii: a playlist 

❝ Take What You Want  ❞ Post Malone ft Ozzy Osborne & Travis Scott

❝ Serotonin ❞

Call Me Karizma

❝in the dark❞

Bring Me The Horizon

❝Run❞

Joji

❝Brown Paper Bag ❞

Yoshi Flower

❝ Scumbag❞

Goody Grace ft Blink-182

❝At the Bottom ❞

Brand New

❝ ANGELS & DEMONS❞

jxden

❝Sextape❞

Deftones

❝Drive Safe ❞

Rich Brian

❝ DEAD TO ME❞

Blackbear

iii: a study 

⸻ NAME: Skeeter Dawson Higgins 

⸻ AGE: twenty-eight

⸻ GENDER: agender

⸻ PRONOUNS: he/they

⸻ SEXUALITY: bisexual / pansexual

⸻ RELATIONSHIP: cursed

⸻ FACECLAIM: Pete Davidson

⸻ HEIGHT: 6’3”

⸻ HAIR COLOR: black

⸻ EYE COLOR: brown

⸻ MARKINGS: a couple of scars from tattoos they never got fully removed

⸻ TATTOOS: he’s got a lot, these are a couple of their favs too, 1, 2, 3 

⸻ PIERCINGS: this many

⸻ DECORUM: joggers and high top chucks, paired with sweatshirts because they are always cold, and ever necessary ball cap

 ⸻ SCENT: general man stink ( onion armpits ) caused by stress sweat and general lack of care, burnt metal, skunky smoke covered up by vanilla incense & occasionally Oldspice

⸻ POSITIVE TRAITS:  many- sided, spontaneous, punctual

⸻ NEUTRAL TRAITS: immature, undogmatic, tidy

⸻ NEGATIVE TRAITS: confrontational, devious, fickle

⸻ ZODIAC: sagittarius

⸻ ALIGNMENT:  neutral evil

⸻ MTBI: isfp

⸻ ENNEGRAM: 5, 4, 6

⸻ TEMPERAMENT: melancholic

⸻ ELEMENT: earth

⸻ PRIMARY VICE: lust

⸻ PRIMARY VIRTUE: patience 

⸻ TROPE: Asshole Victim, Consummate Liar, Affably Evil, Beware of the Nice Ones, Only Known by their Nickname, The Stoic, Brutal Honesty, Don’t you dare pity me !, Heroic Comedic Sociopath

⸻ INSPIRATION: This gifset, also this one, with some Steven Hyde x Fezco from Euphoria and Lip Gallagher from Shameless Inspo 

⸻ GOALS: Live past 30

⸻ FEARS: God– losing his brothers in the MC, dogs, real silver ( he works with every other metal, of course ) & the ocean– any  huge body of water.

⸻ OCCUPATION: Cashier at Kum N Go Gas Station, and drummer for Cy’s band, dispatcher for the MC & busker ( think drumming on the side of the street for money or in the park )

⸻ RESIDENCE: Alone at Salem’s Lot.

⸻ HOBBIES:  Pyrography, metalworking & welding ( he went to school for it but no one will hire him lol ) insect collecting/ preserving and turning it into cool jewelry and trinkets, pool with the boys, also drumming.

⸻ HABITS:  annoying drumming with anything he can beat with ( finger tapping against tables, pens upon a desk, straws with their ends nearly chewed off– he constantly feels like there is a beat in his head ), he walks with a bit of a limp due to jumping off of a building ( he was in crutches for about a year ), he cracks his knuckles when he’s thinking, he uses excessive salt in his food ( and therefore always has a puffy and swollen face which he of course doesn’t take care of )  

iv: a biography 

he’s recently come back from taking a month away from Salem– if people ask, he’d say he was on a journey of self discovery, really he was just spending time with his dad and recovering from just losing his job, and is back in town for the baby shower, and STAYING.

Skeeter is the name used by teachers, mentors, principals, & other authoritative figures, including his father who is currently housed in a nursing home in Florida. Growing up, because he was the third Skeeter Higgens in existence, the name Trey was gifted to him, Junior was his father’s name, and Dawson was reserved for his great grandfather. ALTHOUGH, Trey is not a name that he goes by anymore. His mother was the last person to call him that–Cyrek doesn’t even call them this because it is very triggering for him.  Skeet is a name that stuck for a long time, but Higgies is what the people closest to him call him. When you break the walls down and get the true intimacy, he’ll let you know when you can call him Trey.

He’s Cyrek’s first ever like ride or die moving from Staten Island at 8 and becoming Cyrek’s childhood best friend. They’d eventually remeet in HS at 15/16 and were besties ever since.

They were raised Jewish, but the whole vampire thing messed with their head and made them stop believing in god / fearing god since it’s a bit of a devil’s deal thing. They struggle with weighing the pros and cons of religion and while they would like to think there is a place in the afterlife where they could see their mom, they know it’s not a place that would let the likes of them into.

Their mother struggled with BPD all their life– and this was a strain on their father and grandfather’s relationship to the point where their grandparents eventually disowned Higgies and wrote them out of a rumored grand family inheritance. The inheritance is something they never really cared for, but it still hurts them sometimes to think that family could turn their back on family. Their mother was the light of their life, but they could always sense that light pulling away– they still regret to this day not noticing that light fully extinguishing to the point where she’d take her own life. Higgies was the one to find her body at age seventeen, and it fully devastated them, scarring them for the rest of their life.

Basketball was his first real passion– to the point that he sought out playing basketball professionally. The passing of his mother, however, affected him too much, causing him to spiral and lose a passion for most things. Everything sort of became numb, and it was hard for him to find motivation to do anything– dribbling a ball included. He’d eventually fuck up his chances walking out of a major game, unimpressing scouts for scholarships, and losing his chance at going to college for basketball. Depression hit hard at such a pivotal age for him, but with Cy’s help, and a strict plan for therapy, and a new passion for drumming he was finally able to pick up the pieces and express himself through music.

They are still on medications, and honestly try to be an adult about their mental health scheduling appointments and going to therapy regularly. They joke that they are the unofficial poster child for ✨therapy kinda works but only if you have money thing ✨ – they’ve adopted a bit of a wholistic outlook on life, trying their hardest to live by clean eating and meditation and the ✨self care part✨ of therapy, however, they also like to set things on fire for fun, smoke so much weed and forget about responsibilities, start fights for no reason, and party like a rockstar– so Hig is very hypocritical~ 

Their dad, despite his deteriorating state, is a backup source of income and a big part of his support system, aside from Cyrek and the MC. a couple of month’s ago, however, their father was officially diagnosed with alzheimer's which, makes it hard visiting the man. 

Since basketball fell through, after high school, they went to a trade school for welding. They’ve bounced around from different companies and different jobs, but until recently ( since they couldn’t pass a pee test ) they got fired and now work at Kum and Go 🤣

They are the Dispatcher for the MC, technically third in command, but whatever Cyrek says goes. They take their role very seriously because they are very loyal to Cyrek and will defend any and all of Cyrek’s orders, decisions and/or commands. They help Matteo with inventory, and 10/10 will be the muscle if need be.  

He very much believes in the idea of bros before hoes, which makew him a 🤏🏼 jelly of Evren ( and honestly, thinks Cyrek deserves better, but sHH) He is respectful of their relationship as long as Cyrek is happy and as long as he gets to hang out with his main dude 😩

THE RUMOR: Is it true? Did he contract an STD from a groupie? The answer, no. Higgies has been on SSRI’s for years, changing up doses, and switching to different types and because antidepressants mess with your libido, he struggles with maintaining a full erection, and “finishing” in a timely matter ( sometimes not even at all ). he doesn’t know who started this rumor, but he’s never really corrected it either. 

v: connection ideas

GENERAL IDEAS

EX-GF ( GABS )- freshly broken up due to his immaturity.

RELATIVES - his family is from Staten Island, but he moved to Salem when he was 8 years old. Spent a three years in Manchester while his mother was inpatient- but settled in Salem.  He comes from a strong line of Higgins’ ( he’s the third, hence Trey, but he’s also the biggest family disappointment– so they may hate him etc ) 

CY’S RELATIVES - CY’S FAMILY IS HIS FAMILY. He’s the other godparent to the babies, and he loves being that weird Uncle Higgies 

THE AFFAIR - Another reason for his divorce or a rebound now mistaken for such a paramour ( I imagine these two have a long history of off and on again, and they are maybe on again? ) all ex-flings are welcome and all messy connections like that are welcome ! BROMANCES - He’s a firm believer in bros over hoes. 

CHILDHOOD CRUSH - likely never came to fruition, but he was very immature around them and picked on them and it was a typical ( they are mean because they like you sort of thing– must be from Salem )

FELLOW MUSICIANS - he’s loyal to his band, but also 100% will do anything to beat sticks on anything at any moment. 

Debauchery Friends - He’s not the life of the party and often times the butt of the joke, but he’s a loyal friend  

Good influence - someone who helps him stay out of trouble, and makes sure he doesn’t do bad things and has soft eyes for him despite how much of a shit he is

WHERE YOU CAN FIND THEM

Kum n Go Gas Station

Flying Saucer Pizza

Cryptid Cinema

Giant Food Store

Starfox Roadside Diner

Strikepin

Vulcan Video

Winter Island Drive-In

Amtrak Train Station

Automoco

Crowscare Emporium

Scaredy Cat Club

Sugar’s Lounge

Vicious Vandals Lair 

Thunder Bunny Tattoo 

CURRENT CONNECTIONS

Cyrek - ride or die

Atticus - failed mediator between him & Cy and his tattoo artist most of the time.

Athie - Sister they never had.

Everen - jelly of her

Gabs - he’s obsessed w her tbh but also this whole board 

Saja - this one 

Matteo - MC BUDDY

Evan - MC BUDDY

Sera - bandmates

Ellie - bandmates

Dottie - ONE OF THE EX’S BABY

Andres - drumming friends

Dollie - she hates them.

vi: tags 

;; SKEETER HIGGENS III. 

;; SKEETER HIGGENS III: MUSINGS.

;; SKEETER HIGGENS III: CONNECTIONS.

;; SKEETER HIGGENS III: STARTERS.

;; SKEETER HIGGENS III: THREADS.

;; HIGGIES & ⸻

[heroicvilliansometimes]

Band of Brothers High school au part2

Joseph Libegott

-Is a sophomore and is a A/B student he doesn't go for anything higher ok so get off his back

-I feel like he would be in a goth phase and I mean black nail polish, smokes cigarettes, wears a chain on his pants, and on special occasion black lipstick

-He listens to metal bands and will start a fistfight if you confuse rock and metal so just don't ever bring up music taste ok

-He aces his foreign language class which is obviously German however if you ask him for help in any other class beside foreign he is going to say No not because he doesn't understand them but because he doesn't like wasiting his time talking about classes he's not intrested in

-Yes he is dating Webster kinda I mean it's on and off well I mean what do you expect they argue a shit ton ok

Joe Toye

- Is only a sophomore and he's already tired of everyone's bullshit

-He also has a truck and holds it dear to his heart so don't fucking scratch just don't

-Is on the football team and is part of Philsophy club don't judge me I feel like would enjoy Philsophy ok

-Is a B student but will help you as much as he can but like don't be mad if he drags your grade down a letter like he tried

-He likes George Luz but is to afraid to ask him out which in returns sexually frustrates him so don't be surprised if you find porn mags in his bag or gym locker

William "Wild Bill/Gonorrhea" Guarnere

-Is a sophomore plays football and is Joe's best friend

-Is a C students and he's proud of it

-Y'all he works at the Salt and Pepper diner on the weekends and holy shit the uniforms he wears there is so hilarious that Bill is so ashamed to wear it

-Is an active member of the Dog appreciation club and I mean active like he sets up money collecting fundraisers, sets up posters around the school and town alerting the people that they need more volunteers for the animal shelter, owns like three pitbulls and a Chihuahua

-He's a flirt ok like Buck you will catch him constantly flirting with the cheerleaders but don't ever assume he isn't a gentleman ok like he helped one of the shyer cheerleaders get a date with Babe

George Luz

-Is a sophomore but has freshman mentality

-Yes he sells weed but he doesn't smoke it ok so if you get a bad batch don't blame him blame his supplier

-If you ever see him with the Mortar squad you either book it or join them because they are playing prank and when they do pranks they go hard

-Is a B+ student and he says he wants to do better but like who are you trying to fool George

-His feelings for Joe is confusing ok because one second he views as just a friend and another second he's daydreaming about making out with him so don't ask him who's his crush because he will have a hour long speech about his feelings for Joe

Darrell "Shifty" Powers

-Is a sophomore but takes some senior classes yeah because that's how smart he is

-Is part of the archery club but he goes to the shooting range every Saturday with his father and brothers

-Is that one student that everbody likes and if you hate him keep to yourself ok because you will get your ass beat if you bring it up to anybody

-Is part of the National Honors Society so if you see him picking up garbage or is helping the elderly at the old folks home then you know why

-This may surprise you but he smokes pot ok like you know that one scene where he was smoking a cigarette in the show well to pay tribute I made him a pothead

Charles "Chuck" Grant

-Is a sophomore but has some junior classes

-I feel like he would be on the Baseball team but was benched for three months because one of his teammates cough cough Floyd Carver cough cough got into an argument with him and while he had his back turn threw a speed ball at his head giving him a concussion but don't worry he's fine

-Yes he drinks but not excessively like he drinks only at parties and small get togethers

-He listens to Lana Del Ray and yes it's because of that post I made about chuck grant and lana del ray don't judge me

-Yes Speirs has a soft spot for him so don't be surprised when Chuck asks him to do something and he does it

Floyd Talbert

-Is such a playboy I can't even count how many times you see him walk off with a cheerleader to a secluded area

-Plays Baseball but only because girls like dudes who play sports however don't think he's bad at Baseball because he's not

-In archery club which will explain why he's such a good pitcher

-You will often catch him at the shooting range and if Shifty's there you better expect him to hit on him because holy shit he has a bad crush on him

-Is the vice-president of the Dog appreciation club and that is all I have to say

Edward "Babe" Heffron

-Is a freshman but if you bully him Bill will find out and he will kick your ass

-Is part of the art club and is an art hoe

-Ok hear me out Babe is a tennis player that's it that's all I got to say

-You know those movies where the jock is friends with the nerd/basket case well that describes Bill and Babe's relationship perfectly

-His parents refused to sigh him up for sex ed so Bill and the others educate him secretly

[gen-z-student-quotes]

Heres a ton of quotes from my high school

Student 1: “I had a leg up on her but you saw how that turned out…” Student 2: “How did you have a leg up?”


S1: “She knew my great grandpa.” S2: “And how old is he?” S1: “He’s dead.” S2: “Oh…” Student: I thought I just took a human life. S1: “I need one that’ll hold all eight of my children.” S2: “I thought you had like twenty?” S1: “…I killed them.” S1: “Click it real fast!” S2: “NO! Thats illegal in the state of the United States!” Science Teacher: It’s time for Duggie to get frisky. Band Director: “Who has the Kubasa?” Student: “Im a kubasa!” BD: “You’re not a sausage.” Science Teacher: “Third rock from the sun.” S1: “Jupiter…right?” S2: “….NO!” Librarian: Maybe its possessed by satan. BD: Tuba or not tuba. Student: Tuesday is the best day of the week for some unknown reason other than the fact that it’s Tuesday. Science Teacher: My head is very foggy today and the drugs haven’t helped. Don’t quote me on that. Student: “How should parents handle a bad report card?”


Spanish Teacher: “Death.” Student: Aaron, move your penis out of the way. I need to get water. Student: Do I really want to go to medical school or am I subconsciously trying to impress my parents? Thats a secret I don’t even know. Im always having a crisis. XOXO, Family Disappointment S1: “Something fun to hit.” S2: “On.” S1: “That was stupidly smooth and I hate you for it.” Student: “Called the Scuds.” Spanish Teacher: “Hah. This gets worse the more you talk.” Student: I got through middle school via sleep deprivation and self deprecation. Student: I’m high bi and ready to die but I’m single and too focused on getting into a good university to mingle so cross cross applesauce do me a favour and just get lost Student: Im here Im queer and i'm full of existential fear. Student: Im single but I’m too afraid of rejection to mingle. Student: Im not a jellyfish… (quietly) I’m a human. Student: I went to bed at 9:30 last night. I am THRIVING! Student: I don’t know why but I have a weird fear of Catholics. Student: This band is the beginning of a porno I swear. X15 Student: Tea is just leaf juice and its gross. Student: Coffee is just bean juice so- S1: “Whats wrong with murder?” S2: “A lot of things Emilee- Theres a lot of thing wrong with murder.” Student: You called me a ginger yesterday. I will give you gingivitis. Student: “How do you do it?” English Teacher: “Most of us are medicated” S1: *barks and growls* S2: Silence you furry. Science Teacher: “Potassium.” Student: “Bananas” Student: Quit! You got fry dust in my eye! Student: See if your Armor of God protects you now. Science Teacher: I hit 190 pounds and I felt like a toad. Science Teacher: “It was really a cool feeling.” Student: “Was that a pun?” Science Teacher: “…Frosty.” S1: “Moment.” S2: “I’ve been singing that wrong my entire life! I thought it was woman!” S1: *Turning around in rolling chair* “Wait- repeat what you just said.” Student: Why did you draw a burning Elmo? Creative Writing Teacher: “The ‘H’ word” Student: “Hell?” CW Teacher: “nO!” S1: “Who said I ruined the peanut butter sandwich? It is now a cockroach peanut butter sandwich.” S2: “Ewww” S1: “Crunchity munchity.” Student: *while walking out of class* See you all in therapy. Student: *while walking back in* Hello guys, its just your neighborhood disappointment. Science Teacher: “Are you talking to your stomach?” Student: “Yeah..” Science Teacher: “Thats weird.” Student: “What are you dressed up as?” Spanish Teacher: “The bitch that I am.” Student: Im gonna name my kids gonorrhea. No, Crabs Brown. Student: Suck my strap on. Student: Its pronounced DIK DIK! Student: I’m gonna drink lead. Student: Mrs. Bustle, do you know what gonorrhea feels like? Science Teacher: Thats the stupid molecule at work again! Vice Principle: No reason to go outside today. Its cold… rainy….. I don’t want you to get sick. You can go outside during the bonfire. Where it will be cold and rainy! Student: I walk around the house with a non-binary flag on my ass. Student: This tea would taste a lot better if I was on a deserted island. Student: Our generation are the ones who ate tide pods. Natural Selection is coming for us. Student: It all started with Harambe. Student: Its my turn on the brain cell!   Math Teacher: I had no expectations but you still disappointed me. Science Teacher: The cool thing about rocks is that you can throw them at your friends. Animal Care Teacher: Remember! Don’t flush the hamsters! Student: The toothbrush water isn’t the same. Band Director: I will tear out your liver! Student: *In spanish* You’re a whorehey. Student: I’m a complement to have in your life. *Seconds later* Can I jump out the window now? Student: *Walks in the room* I think my phone just shit itself. Student; Half of them were in serious relationships- wait, that makes me sound like a hoe. S1: “It was something you used to be obsessed with.” S2: “Oh…..Depression.” S1: “Are these eyeballs?”


S2: “Uhhh duh.” S1: “Why were they in the microwave?” S2: “I was doing an experiment!”


Student: I WILL beat your ass. Student: I’d probably go out and stand in the middle of the hallway, mocking them. Student while pushing themselves across the floor: Slither slither… *louder* Slither slither.. *louder* I’m a snake. Slither slither SSSssssSShksssks Student: I want to turn my finger nails into potato chips. I want to dip them in hot grease and flavor them barbecue. Student: *In a terrible Russian accent.* Close the door! I don’t want my toes to be turned into popsicles! Vice Principle: Today we are having food…I’m not sure what it is but it’s food. S1: “Ok boomer.”


S2: “I’m not a boomer I’m a Leo!” Student: Are you looking at Reindeer privates? Student: The shit you see at 4am in *Insert Town Name* is very interesting.

- I think it's really cool when you guys send us these 🖕

[greasyartrat]

Fandom Seo Bi: yeong shin u dumbass, hoe can't even realize u got a crush on the prince

Canon Seo Bi: i think ur red and ur dick hurts cuz of gonorrhea

[surra-de-bunda]

I told one of my friends about this earlier but it’s still on my mind. Two of my co-workers admitted to me their body counts and it’s tripping me out for reasons that may not be obvious to others. It’s not about slut shaming. 

One is married. Mexican lady. Virgo. Around my age. Me, her and another co-worker were chatting during down time and she mentioned something about liking her ‘Coffee Black, like her dick’ because I asked her does she drink coffee. We were talking about how we were low on energy and we were initially talking about energy drinks.

Her mentioning Black Dick created this whole discussion regarding her deepest sexual experiences. She confessed that she cheats on her husband. Not because he cheats on her or abuses her or is emotionally neglectful. She was like, ‘Hell no” laughing...But confirmed it’s because she gets bored and she gets tempted. She told us that she told him her body count is 7, but it’s really over 100 in the span of 4-5 years. She lost her virginity at 18. She said she went through a whore phase and fucked a lot of guys. Multiple in a day and every day. She blurted out that she’s had a couple trains ran on her and she loves them. She said she loves sex outside. Anywhere. She said she’d fuck a lead or A.M. at our job (not to benefit her pay) but ‘just because it’s fun and the adrenaline.’ We were talking about rumors going around at the job and she said she’d love to fuck guys from our job at our job. Then she keeps talking and says that she’s never used a condom in her life. She said she’s only had gonorrhea and she gave it to her husband and when he confronted her she told him it wasn’t her even though she knows she gave it to him.

Another co-worker (who I’m pretty cool with). She’s mid-20s. Aquarius. She’s one of those people who just spills her and anyone’s business to whoever with no hesitation and she talks and talks and talks on herself revealing shit that will make you gag on the inside, but you don’t wanna make it obvious with your face. She’s the same co-worker who admitted to me she can fuck anyone without catching feelings and could even fuck her friends’ men and not feel bad. That’s what triggered me to keep her at a distance even though we must interact with each other at work.

She admitted to me before she’s had curable stds like 7 or 8 times. She tells me about how her aunt calls her a whore and brings it up around everyone in public places. I initially thought her aunt was just jealous of her because of how she portrays her aunt. I told her to just limit contact with the aunt because she sounds toxic. So earlier, she told me, ‘Uh...My body count is around...uh...150 or a little more.’ My jaw dropped but I was like trying not to make her uncomfortable. She said most of them were one night stands and she did it because of ‘depression’. I felt some empathy and was like “I get you...’

Then I started thinking about how she’s always telling me she’s struggling for money. She was saying she’s too good to be an instagram model hosting club events but goes to the club on our days off. She’s always at the club. She’s forever calling other women hoes too. She always talking to me and complaining to me about how people owe her money and she’s broke and starving and I’m now like ‘You did all that fucking...that you enjoy doing...for FREE...You’ve fucked 150+ men for FREE...while you have no food in your refrigerator, no car, complaining about your cell phone bill, always saying you’re hungry and no one does anything for you, asking me for my food and whining nonstop...’

I’m sorry. But if you’re promiscuous and you love fucking and you’re able to fuck a lot of people, you need to get fucking paid for it. Because they gonna tell people you’re a ho anyway and it’s gonna create a reputation for you regardless. People talk and they are always telling folks about who they’ve fucked so you’re gonna be looked at AS A HO. Why do you have too much pride not to get something out of it? Why do you feel like it’s a burden to require payment if you’re letting random niggas cum inside of you and risk your health? Charge these niggas because not only will they pay but they gonna tell people about the shit yall did anyway.

[fortheloveofskz]

I think Vanjie gets more fan dick than Brooke. In the latest sibling rivalry ep Bob makes a joke saying she doesn’t hug people because blah blah “and they hug Vanjie and who knows what that bitch has” then Monet says gonorrhea. They were joking but implying Vanjie is promiscuous. At least that’s how I read it.

We have had this debate before, and I think it was pretty down the middle, but personally I think B is the bigger hoe. I really think V is all talk, well mostly talk. Also nothing wrong with being a hoe if you are single. As long as you are safe :)

[kawaiiasfuckk]

Btw, I was contacting those guys I met after the clinic noticed me about gonorrhea and I could tell the most of them were pretty upset to me? But hoe, you should be thankful that I informed you so all y’all grow the fuck up.

[itsstillthegayblog]

so small storytime

last friday night i got to see katya at roscoe's tavern in chicago. she did a solo show after a short-ish m&g and prefaced her actual performances with about a 15-20 minute video montage of her moments on the two drag race seaons she did and some of her own youtube stuff. this was clearly katya's show, part of her big comeback to the drag scene, meant to be about her.

inbetween sets she told the crowd a story about how she got gonorrhea (yay!) and prefaced it with talking about going home with some trade and some hoe-might've been drunk dunno-yells out "WAS IT TRIXIE" and there was this awkward pause and katya just kinda went "oh honey no that ship has sailed" and continued her story. thankfully nobody else asked some dumb shit like that but my god i felt the cringe from across the club.

like this show was just about katya; the video montage at the start purposely didn't include anything from UNHhhh or TTAKS, so obviously no focus was meant to be had on trixie or katya's friendship with her. can we please make a goddamn effort to be actual fans and not creepy 'stans' now that katya's back in business please? thanks this has been a psa.

[ratsoh-writes]

You should headcannon me swooping in and stealing your man. ;) These hoe-rrors ain't loyal, amiright? -gonorrhea makes her first pun and it's terrible

It was terrible lol