#goofball probs earned it by now

[renabe4life]

dropping in with a wee gift for @biqrow

[sinesalvatorem]

Conversation I Just Had With A Tumblr Bot

Bot: hey there hun

Me: Hello?

Bot: i got ure name from the friend search here on tumblr cuz i was bored and lookin for new people to talk to but i hope i didn't bother u... i know it's a lil random lol

Me: Not bothered. You're someone I know irl, then?

Bot: 22/f... what r ya up 2?

Me: 19/f. I just finished liveblogging a movie I was watching.

Bot: i just got done studying and i'm gonna take a lil break i'm still in college right now so now i just started back a lil over a month ago and i'm already lookin forward to thanksgiving break

Me: ...Thanksgiving was last month? For most people, this is finals week, and winter break is going to start soon. Are you from a non-American place which also has a Thanksgiving but at a different time of year?

Bot: i was sent from above to fulfill your fantasy's lol

Me: I'm a huge slut for world history. My fantasy is to know which country you're studying in, and what events led to them having Thanksgiving in December.

Bot: lol, welll i have an idea if ure up for a lil fun ;)

Me: Sure! Send me all the Wikipedia articles you've got! Educate me, senpai!

Bot: i was actually going to be getting to work here shortly. my one friend was working online and i kept askin her about it so she finally showed me what she was doing when we got back to school. i thought she was nuts at first lol, u r prob gonna laugh but u wanna hear?

Me: Yes, tell me all the crazy historical facts your sketchy friend knows

Bot: we work online doing private webcam shows which sounded super nuts at first believe me. but i freakin luv it! turns out i can be a lil bit more of a freak than i realized and i really like to put on a show lolol

Me: Oh wow, you guys have your own history documentary web series? Congratulations! I hope you do well and get acquired by the BBC. Unless that's insensitive because you were a British colony. Then I hope you get acquired by somewhere less imperially fraught.

Bot: well so what i was going to say is i have some free passes and i usually just do a private show before i get started to "warm up" lol. no one is online though so i was going to give u one of the passes if u wanted... buttt u have to give me a really good rating so i can get more if u do tho k?

Me: Sure, I bet you're great and will definitely rate highly in historical accuracy and comprehensiveness. Please go ahead.

Bot: dont u worry tho... ill earn it lol. k its http://live-webcams.net and u should see a lil button to accept my invite and connect now to create your profile. u just click on that. then make ure own username or w/e and u can cumm into my private chat for us two, only takes a sec to do

Me: Oh, wow, you guys not only managed to get the domain for Web Commandos, but went further and acquired a (slightly misspelled) shortening. Impressive!

Bot: ya you will need a credit card of sum sort... but, its just to make sure ure over 18 cuz there's a lot of them on here obv

Me: A lot of whom? There are a lot of under-18s on your totally-historically-accurate not-a-porn-site? Well, what seems to be the problem, exactly? This is what high school education is for.

Bot: u should feel special i dont usually give out this one!!! lols im such a goofball sumtimes

Me: Oh, yes, I definitely feel special. You are certainly not a loose woman who would undiscerningly distribute historical information to unvetted plebians. Verily, I am honoured by the privilege of your live action Wikipedia.

Bot: i really can't wait too its going 2 be so much fun. i love meeting new ppl on here, oh by the way... might wanna turn ure speakers down cuz i can get a lil loud once i get going

Me: Yes, battle scenes can often involve rather loud explosions. I'll be careful.

Bot: i'm about to go grab some of my favorite toys i'll brb. hurry up though i better see ure name in my room when i get back lol

Me: Toys? I didn't realise your documentary series was also a puppet show, but what a novel idea. I applaud your ingenuity.

[aardvarkist13]

happygirl358 Not following each other Yesterday at 11:07 PM happygirl358 heya xoxo aardvarkist13 OMG HI happygirl358 i got ure name from the member search here on tumblr cuz i was bored and lookin for new people to talk to but i hope i didn't bother u... i know it's a lil random lol aardvarkist13 why haven't you posted or reblogged on tumblr yet?? happygirl358 22/f... what r u up 2? aardvarkist13 Well I just saw Ex Machina so am excited to talk to you! ... maybe that's why you contacted me? happygirl358 i just got back from my xmas vacation and i'm really not excited for it. lol. i'm still in college right now so i was really loving the time off u know? aardvarkist13 Yep! Where'd you go: cold or warm? happygirl358 lol, so i have an idea if ure up for a lil fun ;) aardvarkist13 Turing test? or Voight-Kampff? happygirl358 i was actually gonna get to work here shortly. my girlfriend was working online and i kept askin her about it so she finally showed me what she was doing when we got back to school. i thought she was nuts at first haha, ure prob gonna laugh but u wanna hear? aardvarkist13 It is impossible to talk or to write without apparently throwing oneself helplessly open. Herman Melville so go ahead. happygirl358 we work online doing private webcam shows which sounded suuper crazy at first trust me. but i freakin luv it!!! turns out i can be a lil bit more of a freak than i realized and i really like to put on a show lolol aardvarkist13 Whoa, online cam business! So I bet you are concerned about Net Neutrality then, huh. Do you think it will help your business to have "fast lanes" or is that going to be too expensive and end up hurting you? I just hope the net can stay neutral, you know what I mean? happygirl358 well so what i was gonna say is i have sum free passes and i usually just do a private show before i get started to "warm up" lol. no one is online though so i was going to let u use one of the passes if u wanted... buttt u have to give me a really good rating so i can get more if u do tho k? aardvarkist13 Well, I do have to say that you are not passing the Turing test, so on that I cannot give you a good rating ... but maybe you'll get a higher rating with the Voight-Kampff test, want to try that? happygirl358 oh i'll earn it don't u worry lol. its http://*******-cams.***/***** and u should see a lil button to accept my invite and connect now to create your profile. u just click on that. then make ure own username or w/e and u can cumm join my private chat for us 2, only takes a sec to do aardvarkist13 Well, I'm glad you're so confident! Let's get started: It's your birthday. Someone gives you a calfskin wallet. How do you react? happygirl358 yea you will need a c.c of sum kind... but, its just to keep out the underage kids cuz there's a lot of them on here obv aardvarkist13 Reaction time is a factor in this, so please pay attention. Now answer as quickly as you can. You're in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, it's crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on it's back. The tortoise lays on it's back, it's belly baking in the hot sun, beating it's legs trying to turn itself over, but it can't, not without your help. But you're not helping. Why is that, HappyGirl358? happygirl358 u should feel special i dont usually give out this one!!! lols im such a goofball sumtimes aardvarkist13 Hmm, I gotta say this isn't going well for you. But I'll give you one more question and see how you respond before letting you know how you rate. You meet someone. He shows you his butterfly collection plus the killing jar. What do you do? happygirl358 whatever u have mind babez ;) aardvarkist13 Wow, okay, this wasn't a very good showing. I'm so disappointed. There's no way, at this stage of your development, that you could pass for human--not with me anyway. Have you met some people on here that actually think you're more than just a bot? So, anyway, sadly, you've earned a poor rating with me and I cannot recommend you. And having just watched Ex Machina and being such a huge fan of the Blade Runner world, I had such high hopes for our first interaction. :( Keep trying though; someday you might astonish me and the world. happygirl358 lol no i'm not a bot.. aardvarkist13 How do you know for sure? How does anyone.... happygirl358 i'm really excited 2 its goin to be so much fun. i love meeting new ppl on here, oh by the way... might wanna turn down ure speakers cuz i can get a lil loud once i get going Active in the last hour 0 unread message Is this spam? Mark as spam

Do Androids DM of Electric Sheep?

[ruimteinjezelfactiveren]

angelgrl-x54

Volgen elkaar niet

afgelopen vrijdag om 02:51

angelgrl-x54

hey there hun

vandaag om 15:17

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

hello how are you

angelgrl-x54

i got ure name from the profile search here on tumblr cuz i was bored and lookin for new people to talk to but i hope i didn't bother u... i know it's a lil random lol

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Nice

angelgrl-x54

22/f... whats up?

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

What do you think about abortion?

angelgrl-x54

i just got back from my xmas vacation and i'm really not happy for it. lol. i'm still in university right now so i was really enjoying the time off ya know?

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Do you have a boyfriend?

I understand you enjoy your time of, i know

angelgrl-x54

lol, welll i have an idea if ure up for a lil fun ;)

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Do you have a boyfriend?

And did you already get pregnant in the past?

angelgrl-x54

i was actually gonna get to my job here shortly. my one friend was working online and i kept askin her about it so she finally showed me what she was doing when we got back to school. i thought she was crazy at first haha, u r prob gonna laugh but u wanna hear?

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Yes

angelgrl-x54

we work online doing private webcam shows which sounded soooper sketchy at first believe me. but i freakin luv it! turns out i can be a lil bit more of a freak than i realized and i really like to put on a show lolol

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Cool what else do you do?

angelgrl-x54

ill do w/e u tell me bb ;)

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Do you have a baby?

angelgrl-x54

well so what i was gonna say is i have sum free passes and i usually just do a private show before i get started to "warm up" lol. no one is online though so i was going to give u one of the passes if u wanted... butt u have to give me a really good rating so i can get more if u do tho k?

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Do you love me?

angelgrl-x54

dont u worry tho... ill earn it lol. its www.private-cams.site/bella and u should see a lil button to accept my invite and connect now to create your profile. u just click on that. then make ure own username or w/e and u can cum into my private chat for us 2, only takes a sec to do

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

What do you think about abortion? Are you pro-life?

angelgrl-x54

yeah u do need a cc of sum kind... but, its just to keep out the underage kids cuz there's a lot of them on here obv

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

How old are you?

angelgrl-x54

just turned 22 :)

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

What do you study?

angelgrl-x54

this is the special page for special ppl!!! lol im such a goofball sumtimes

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

Why?

angelgrl-x54

i really can't wait 2 its going 2 be so much fun. i love meeting new ppl on here, oh by the way... might wanna turn down ure speakers cuz i can get a lil loud once i get going

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

what sound do you make?

 angelgrl-x54

i'm about to go grab some of my favorite toys i'll brb. hurry up though i better see ure name in my room when i get back lol

ruimteinjezelfactiveren

do I need to pay

 Actief in het afgelopen uur

0 ongelezen bericht

Ziet het er verdacht uit?Markeren als spam

[quiteegregiouslychuffed]

I got contacted by a phishing bot

cutie-a88: hey babes ya there

Me: iron within, iron without

cutie-a88: i got ure name from the profile search here on tumblr cuz i was bored and lookin for new people to talk to but i hope i didn't bother u... i know it's a lil random lol

Me: With the thirty-seven keys of Tzeentch, we open the way for our brothers. With the thousand whispers of Slaanesh, we call to them. With the twelve plagues of Nurgle, we fell their enemies. And with the mighty axe of Khorne, we cut open the world for them. Yog-Sothoth knows the gate. Yog-Sothoth is the gate. Yog-Sothoth is the key and guardian of the gate. Past, present, future, all are one in Yog-Sothoth. He knows where the Old Ones broke through of old, and where They shall break through again. He knows where They have trod earth's fields, and where They still tread them, and why no one can behold Them as They tread.

cutie-a88: 22/f... what r u up 2?

me: I murdered thousands for the Emperor and he gave me nothing except his damning silence. Now his lapdogs yap for every life I take, while the gods promise me the galaxy.

cutie-a88: im on spring vacation and i'm really excited for it. lol. i'm still in university right now so i love the time off school ya know?

Me: I salute you! For though our path has been long and bloody, you have served our Lord with unflinching courage and the honour of true warriors. We have seen many fall today and must remember, even as we die, that our blood too is welcome...

cutie-a88: lol, soo i have an idea if ure up for a lil fun ;)

Me: Perfect ecstasy, boundless cacophony, excessive agony. I must have more!

cutie-a88: i was actually gonna get to work here shortly. my girlfriend was working online and i kept askin her about it so she finally showed me what she was doing when we got back to school. i thought she was joking at first lol, ure prob gonna laugh but u wanna hear?

Me: You have caused us great discomfort, little flea... And I feel inclined to scratch.In the embrace of the great Nurgle, I am no longer afraid, for with His pestilential favour I have become that which I once most feared: Death.

cutie-a88: we work online doing private webcam shows which sounded soooper nuts at first believe me. but i freakin luv it! turns out i can be a lil bit more of a freak than i realized and i really like to put on a show lolol

Me: Sickness, disease, plague and pox, suffering and the slow, living rot. Such wondrous gifts does Nurgle seek to bestow upon the unworthy human cattle of the Imperium. We are merely the vectors by which his virulent beneficence may be spread to the undeserving masses.

cutie-a88: well so what i was gonna say is i have some free passes and i usually just do a private show before i get started to "warm up" lol. no one is online though so i was going to let u use one of the passes if u wanted... buttt u have to give me a really good rating so i can get more if u do tho k?

Me: If the path to salvation leads through the halls of purgatory, then so be it.

cutie-a88: dont u worry tho... ill earn it lol. its http://private-cams.site/bella and u should see a lil button to accept my invite and connect now to create your profile. u just click on that. then make ure own username or w/e and u can cumm into my private chat for us 2, only takes a sec to do

Me: Your shrines will burn, your streets run with blood, your false idols shattered, your people slaughtered by the thousands, your very planet torn apart… and the barest fraction of my hatred will be satisfied.

cutie-a88: yea u are going to need a cc of some sort... but, its just to make sure ure over 18 cuz there's a lot of them on here obv

Me: Great art so often fails to find an audience with the intellect to appreciate it. Sometimes I am filled with woe to think that no one in this blighted millennium has the wit to see the scope of my brilliance.

cutie-a88u: should feel special i dont usually give out this one!!!! lols im such a goofball sumtimes

Me: Know this! What will come to pass is no longer war! It is endless sacrifice in His name. Blood for the Blood God... let the universe drown in it!

cutie-a88: i really can't wait too it's going 2 be so much fun. i love meeting new ppl on here, oh by the way... might wanna turn down ure speakers cuz i can get a lil loud once i get going 

Me: Cast down the idols! Destroy the temples! Slay the priests! Show these fools that they worship nothing more than a rotting corpse!

cutie-a88: i'm about to go grab some of my favorite toys i'll brb. hurry up though i better see ure name in my room when i get back lol

Me: Kill! Maim! Burn! Kill! Maim! Burn! Kill! Maim! Burn! Kill! Maim! Burn! Kill! Maim! Burn! Kill! Maim! Burn! Kill! Maim! Burn!

[cc-krillin]

What happens when your Krillin hasn’t RPed with an 18 yet

special-z21 hey u xoxo

cc-krillin helloz

special-z21 i got ure name from the profile search here on tumblr cuz i was bored and lookin for new people to talk to but i hope i didn't bother u... i know it's a lil random lol

cc-krillin Oooh, that’s cool! And fine too, no worries!

special-z21 22/f... whatcha up to?

cc-krillin Ooh nice, and well I just got off work, just on tumblr while I'm flying around, you? xD

special-z21 i just got back from my xmas break and i'm really not thrilled about it. lol. i'm still in college right now so i was really loving the time off ya know?

cc-krillin Oh yeah, it’s super hard to get off holiday mode after all, so I get ya haha.

special-z21 lol, soo i have an idea if ure up for a lil fun ;)

cc-krillin yeah? depends on the idea haha

special-z21 i was actually going to be getting to my job here shortly. my one friend was working online and i kept askin her about it so she finally showed me what she was doing when we got back to school. i thought she was out of her mind at first haha, u r prob gonna laugh but u wanna hear?

cc-krillin Oh now I’m curious xD, but yeah sure, can’t be that back haha

special-z21 we work online doing private webcam shows which sounded soooper nuts at first trust me. but i freakin luv it!! turns out i can be a lil bit more of a freak than i realized and i really like to put on a show lolol

cc-krillin well damn lmao, hey that’s one way of finding out your freaky side huh xDDD, how’s the pay for that though? If you don’t mind me asking.

special-z21 well so what i was gonna say is i have sum free passes and i usually just do a private show before i get started to "warm up" lol. no one is online though so i was going to let u use one of the passes if u wanted... buttt u have to give me a really good rating so i can get more if u do tho k?

cc-krillin oooh I see, that’s interesting with the free passes thing and all, but I’m afraid I’ll have to decline your offer. It’s just uh, not my kinda thing haha.

special-z21 oh i'll earn it don't u worry lol. its www.private-cams.site/bella and u should see a lil button to accept my invite and connect now to create your profile. u just click on that. then make ure own username or w/e and u can cum into my private chat for us two, only takes a sec to do

cc-krillin aw, you're a sex-spam-bot, figures =/

special-z21 yeah you do need a card of some sort... but, its just to keep out the underage kids cuz there's a lot of them on here obv

cc-krillin aaand on auto respond, nice! =D

special-z21 u should feel special i dont usually give out this one!!! lols im such a goofball sumtimes

cc-krillin not if you're having this exact same convo with someone else probably =/

special-z21 i really can't wait too this is gonna be so much fun. i love meeting new ppl on here, oh by the way... might wanna turn down ure speakers cuz i can get a lil loud once i get going

cc-krillin and I can't wait to mark you as spam, bye!