#got some other good ones too from that hual

[kaz3313]

I found this Kiibouma sticker at one of the local resale shops (they have buckets of stickers which I assume they bought random sticker packs) and ofc had to pick it up. Might not be my #1 Ouma ship but it is so so cute <33

If your the designer of said art lemme know!! I want to come support you since this is (likely) stolen art!

[inaconstantstateofchange]

binggeyuan modern!AU based on this prompt where shen yuan and luo binghe live in the same apartment building, but have never met each other. SY is more-or-less his regular shut-in self, and keeps very odd hours, which means that he happens to be wide awake the first time LBH gets back to the apartment building at 3 a.m. after some manner of illicit activity and realizes he doesn't have his fucking entrance key. LBH hits one apartment number after another into the intercom, fully prepared to dazzle his way into getting one of them to open the door for him, but the intercom is old, and people come and go from this building often enough that most people don't bother getting it set up, and he's having no luck.

finally, just as he's about to give up and bully his way onto mobei-jun or sha hualing's couch for the night, someone picks up. he doesn't even remember which specific apartment number it was, he was just entering them mechanically. immediately, LBH pulls on his smoothest affect (sure the intercom has no video, only shitty, garbled audio, but that's no reason to let the universe catch you slipping) and prepares to give the sob story performance of his life. before he can even get a single word out, however, there's a crackly, almost indiscernible "Open!" and he hears the click of the entrance door unlocking before the intercom call is ended. he stares at the intercom for a minute, somewhat wrong-footed, but then shakes himself out of it in time to catch the door before it locks again.

SY, for his part, was broken out of a binge-reading spiral by the intercom call, and fully did not realize how late it had gotten. he assumed he had ordered something that was arriving earlier than expected, and kept an ear out for a knock on his front door from the delivery person for a few minutes, but then got sucked back into the target of his current literary criticism.

the next time LBH gets locked out, he starts in the general number range he remembers striking on the last time, and pays closer attention to the numbers this time. he's curious if his little philanthropist will be so accommodating again. SY orders a lot of packages, okay! the one time he didn't pick up the intercom he had to wait an extra three days for his ultra-rare, limited edition merch, which he will not be going through again. this time, though, when the intercom picks up, LBH is prepared. he starts talking immediately, playing up his stress at being locked out, how sorry he is to be a bother, and how much he really, really appreciates it. SY fully blue screens at this unanticipated display of emotions, blurts something out about how it's not problem and of course he's happy to help out a neighbor in need, then hangs up (after unlocking the entrance, of course). it is perhaps fortunate that the intercom has no video, and thus he can not see the look on LBH's face.

LBH gets more and more consistent pushy with his calls, curious how far this little philanthropist will go for him. he knows his apartment number, of course, he could just knock and introduce himself, but he'd rather let him come to him. LBH starts interjecting little questions here and there, trying to glean any information about his mysterious benefactor. SY, meanwhile, is lighting a daily candle for this poor little bun somewhere in his building, who has truly the worst luck in the entire world! who ever heard of a gang of pickpockets stealing someone's keys not once, but twice in the same week!

LBH gets comfortable with the state of things — as ever, too comfortable. nothing good can last forever. one night, after a long and utterly shitty day, for the first time in ages, he loses his key for real. he's tried to avoid reaching out to SY at any time when he's not 100% in control of himself, but there's nothing for it. he punches in the numbers for the unit he knows by heart at this point, and when it picks up, he sighs tiredly, and waits for SY to speak first. after a moment of silence, the call drops, and the door remains locked. LBH is almost shaken entirely out of his malaise. not even a word? he puts SY's apartment number in again, but this time it doesn't even pick up. he stares at the intercom in unpleasant shock for a few minutes, then punches the wall next to it and leaves. he spends the night on mobei-jun's uncomfortably small couch, staring unseeing at the ceiling above him. at least the other man doesn't ask him any questions.

their easy rapport broken, SY starts to worry when he hasn't heard from his unfortunate little neighbor — maybe he's moved out? hopefully to a place with a more accommodating security system... after a full week, his worry ramps up even higher. he wants to believe his neighbor just found a system to keep track of his keys that works for him, but statistically, it seems unlikely. feeling like the most awkward, overstepping idiot on the planet, he scribbles off a few short notes, and sticks one by the the intercom, one by the mailboxes, and one in the laundry room. his neighbor will have to go at least one of those places, certainly?

to my keyless neighbor - hope you're well! i was worried- if you ever need me, you know where to reach me. you weren't a bother- - XX4

the next time LBH stops by the apartment (he's been avoiding it by couch-hopping as much as possible, to the great aggravation of his friends) he carefully avoids looking at the intercom. as such, it's actually sha hualing who spots the note first. (she bullied her way into an invite to make LBH actually go home.) she crows out a harsh laugh, snatching the note off the wall and holding it up dramatically, cackling about "rom-com shit". LBH isn't really paying attention, until he catches a glimpse of the apartment number at the bottom. eyes flashing, he snatches the note out of her hand, and reads it over once, and then again. after a moment, he turns to sha hualing, and tells her to go home, that he's got plans, actually. she gapes at him for a moment, then scoffs and turns on her heel, flipping him off as she goes. whatever! she didn't want to babysit his mopey ass any longer anyway!

LBH spends a few frozen moments running over his options, torn between calling right now just to see if his philanthropist will pick up this time, and giving himself a chance to freshen up, and maybe make a good enough showing for himself that whatever it was that caused him to be ignored before will never happen again. ultimately, he decides on the latter, but rushes through all his preparations as much as he can while maintaining sufficient attention to detail. he wishes he had the materials to make something truly spectacular, but his apartment is showing his absence over the past week. he settles on a meal that just barely feels sufficient, and finds himself more anxious than he can remember being in years at this point, staring at his philanthropist's apartment door, two levels below his.

he raises his fist to knock, tentatively at first, too quiet to hear, and then once more, louder. a muffled voice comes through the door, and a few moments later, it cracks open to reveal a man just a bit shorter than him, with a rumpled shirt that looks like it has just been haphazardly thrown on and hair that might not have been brushed in days. he's... really cute.

LBH and SY just kind of stare at each other, frozen, for a bit, until LBH proffers the food he's brought, and SY's archaic etiquette subroutines kick in, and he invites LBH in before he can even think about. his immediate wince makes it clear he had not meant to do that, but LBH is not above making a situation work to his advantage, and graciously accepts, stepping into the somewhat cluttered apartment before SY can recover from his slip-up. they still have not exchanged names.

ultimately, they get themselves figured out. LBH introduces himself, and SY follows suit. there's a beat of silence as they both realize that this does not actually clear up anything about how they know each other. LBH finds the words to explain his own part in this are slow to come, so he finally just hands the note, neatly folded, to SY. SY's face colors, but he overcomes it to fussily poke at LBH about how worried he was, when the other just disappeared! LBH stops for a second, hearing that, then slowly responds that it was SY who cut him off first. SY gapes at him, then demands to know when he did a thing like that! he set his intercom call sound to caramelldansen and max volume so he'd be sure not to miss it!

LBH gives him the date, and SY flushes again, then looks away, muttering something unflattering about a "qingge". LBH feels a wash of jealousy, that he's misread the situation and SY is already spoken for, but SY goes on to explain that he had been stuck overnight at the hospital - for nothing major! pretty routine actually! - and the friend that was staying with him must have picked up, then hung up when he couldn't figure out who was calling.

LBH sits back, somewhat at a loss. so it... wasn't because SY was tired of him? SY sputters, waving his hands about. absolutely not! he might be slightly forgetful, but binghe is clearly a wonderful young man and it's not like SY has much else going on in his life!

LBH determines to himself then and there that the only way to ensure such a thing does not happen again is to make sure that he is the one staying with SY the next time he's in the hospital.

[tunabesimpin]

TUNAS FIRST CON!!!

lolol baby steps people!!! lets gooooo!!!

Con was super fun first day! I got to dress up! but by god i had a panic attack after i entered LMAO- but after i stopped n took a good breather I was able to walk around and enjoy it more!

warning tuna irl cosplay at the end

HERES THE HUAL!

I also got a cool Anya sweatshirt! The lady i bought it from was actually the one who helped me calm down too ToT <3 She complimented my bird bag and chatted with me a bit which helped me gain more confidence and feel better!

Sadly I didn't spot anyone else twist theme, but lots of genshin cosplayers! It was so cool seeing so many different characters! I even saw a Kaveh cosplay with his suitcase and all!! Very cool! And a sweet Barbara cosplayer stopped me and recognized Lilia!!! I was so happy someone knew!!! She was super sweet I wish i asked for a photo together! Then a few others recognized me after that and i wasn't as scared as i was before! Finally I got in line for the autographs but JESUS- I KNEW THE LINE WOULD BE LONG BUT BRO IT MOVED SO SLOW COMPARED TO THER OTHER LINES- I was in heels and my feet started aching so i left ;v; maybe tomorrow when im more comfy!

And thats it for my first day! it was pretty fun and im excited for tomorrow! Now here are some pics i took of my cos! I was too shy to take any at the actual con;; but hey better some then none!

Alright now i go clean my face cuz gottdamn my eyes r runnin LOLOL Thanks for reading !!!

[dangerouscommiesubversive]

WIP Wednesday

I got tagged by @materassassino and why the hell not, I have so many WIPs right now.

From the King-Ohger thing I started today:

“Good!” Jeramie finally lets go of his waist and gives him a pat on the shoulder. “Then let’s go find Gira, normally around this time he’s in the library—he’s been doing his very best to learn about, you know, economics and civil infrastructure and so on, ‘king things’ as he calls them, but he really needs a dictionary to be convenient while he’s reading.” He heads down the hall, reaching over as he does to take Yanma’s hand like they’re gross teenagers on a date. “He’s very much enjoying having access to Himeno’s library, as a matter of fact, she also has an excellent drama collection. I’ve been timing him, we’re trying to see if he can make one of his villainous king extempores last a full ten minutes.”

Towed along slightly behind him, Yanma stares, distracted from the warm feeling now pervading his entire body by his own bafflement. “You two really made for each other, weren’t you.”

“Mm. I try not to give too much credence to the idea of fate, but it is very convenient that we mesh so well, isn’t it?”

“So what’s with this, then? What do you want me for?”

“Well, we’ve both got a minimum of two functioning eyes, don’t we?” Jeramie glanced back at him with a sunny smile. “Matters of theoretical fate or narrative determinacy aside, one of the ways in which we mesh well is that we’ve both got excellent taste.”

“You–I–do you always talk like this?”

“Like what?”

From an extremely silly SVSSS thing that's mostly back-burnered at the moment but which I think about a lot:

Shen Qingqiu awoke one morning with his face rather awkwardly smushed into his husband's armpit and discovered, to his intense displeasure, that he was being narrated.

Initially, of course, he was simply displeased to be awake, and assumed that the voice he heard was someone speaking in the near distance. It was only when he was standing in front of the bronze mirror in the bathroom, cleaning his teeth, that he fully processed what was happening.

"What the fuck," he said to the mirror.

Once his teeth were actually clean, his hair was at least out of the way, and he'd put on clothing that didn't have any Binghe-induced rips, he sat down to figure out what the hell was going on. He certainly wasn't hearing the dry, computer-cheerful tones of the System, which hadn't actually spoken to him in some time. Nor did it sound like anyone he knew or knew of in the world of Proud Immortal Demon Way. (Not that he would have particularly appreciated being narrated by Sha Hualing or Tianlang-jun or someone, but it would have given him somewhere to start.) As far as he could tell the voice belonged to a woman, who was probably an adult and definitely slightly congested. She wasn't a very deep voice, or a very high one–sort of mid-range, whatever that was called. She was also speaking English, with what he thought was an American accent of some kind, which seemed like it was probably important. Shen Qingqiu's English had never been very strong, but it was good enough to understand what she was saying most of the time, at least, and if this kept up his fluency would probably improve. Score one for skills with extremely limited application in this world.

Did Proud Immortal Demon Way even have an English translation?

"Binghe," he said, when Binghe came into the room with breakfast, "you can't hear a woman speaking right now, can you?"

Binghe blinked at him. "No, shizun. Which woman was it? Should I talk to her?"

And last, from one of the ghost story interlude shorts:

“Huaisang, you’ve got to stop throwing things at the electricians.”

Too...many...WIPs...

Anyway! I will tag @giraffeter @plushie-sentai and @timetoddddavis!

[mxtxfanatic]

Alright, I did one for my mdzs read so it’s time for svsss’s: Character Roundup!

Yue Qingyuan: lowkey gave me lxc vibes with the whole “overlooking abuse happening under my watch that I am both aware of and fully able to stop” thing, but otherwise, greatest Big brother when his Big Brother Energy™️ is directed towards an actual good person

Liu Qingge: dude was considered the God of War but let his reputation go to the wayside just to try to give sqq a proper funeral. If that don’t give him the best shidi award… also extra points for never liking Shen Jiu (though that comment on his cultivation was a loooow blow)

Mu Qingfang: an actually reliable doctor and friend. Too bad doctors are kinda useless in a story where sex is supposed to be the cure for all medical ailments lmao!

Qi Qingqi: she only existed to be bitchy and serve quips and honestly, good for her; one day she’ll outbitch the bitchiest character of them all (sqq)

Ning Yingying: ok but y’all don’t be giving my girl her flowers! The peak didn’t teach her how to fight cause the world wouldn’t have been able to handle an unstoppable nyy! (I want a rematch between her and the palace princess so she can properly stomp miss daddy’s girl into the ground)

Ming Fan: I guess he didn’t die this time around, good for him?

The nameless Qing Jing Peak disciples: I love how somehow sqq raised an entire peak of disciples who are crybabies to his face but disrespectful behind his back to everyone not their shizun (and he thinks it’s just lbh, smh)

Liu Mingyan: always lurking, always writing. Anyways, go make your coin, queen!

Sha Hualing: Luo Binghe owes my girl unlimited PTO, stop overworking her! 😭😭😭

Mobei-jun: congrats on the unintentional husband! Maybe go to someone else for relationship advice

Zhuzhi-lang: breaks my damn heart

Tianlang-jun: breaks my damn heart, but deflects with humor

Su Xiyan: she really did the damn thing, yet all of it is speculation 🤣

Old Palace Master: go to hell, fucking demented old man, fucking stranger danger ass creeper; he deserved having the most torturous death in the book

Shen Jiu formerly known as Shen Qingqiu: he wasn’t a character and didn’t deserve to be, that’s why he got replaced with someone everyone else liked better. All in all, a pitiable backstory and a pitiful end to a character who starts the story erased from existence. Redemption don’t work on the unrepentant

Bingge: oh sweetheart…we need you your own comfort Shen Yuan and a lot of professional help…

The System: still can’t outbitch the bitchiest character of them all LOL

The nameless “righteous” cultivators: Y’all consider it righteous to attack defenseless demons, including infants and toddlers, cause they “might be evil”? Go to hell, i hope at least one of y’all’s evil ass sects got demolished before the merge failed

Shen Qingqiu starring Shen Yuan: thank you, King, for your service in fixing all of your predecessor’s fuck-ups and thereby proving that it’s never to late to atone for the abuse you (not actually you) have wrought, despite what some people have to say 😒 Anyways, enjoy your honeymoon with the man every woman (supposedly) wants!

Luo Binghe: oh honey, oh sweetie, we need you a therapist; go on and enjoy your honeymoon with the man every man wants while that’s pending

Bingqiu: they make each other so happy 🥺 You couldn’t pry this ship from my hands if I was Tianlang-jun’s rotting plant body.

[greentrickster]

I am living for your Binghe househusband au, and now I’m imagining a future side story where Tatsu and Masa get brought into the SVSSS world through Contrived Plot Reasons. Masa would definitely freak out, but I can’t decide if learning that there’s an alternate world where demons and magic are real would faze Tatsu? Either way, they’re both glad for him after learning that he’s happily living his best life thanks to what they taught him!

^U^ Thank-you so much! I agree, Masa would freak so hard, especially since Binghe's got access to his cultivation and all his demonic powers here! Just imagine - landing in this weird new place surrounded by people who look like they're from a fantasy Cdrama, and then you hear a familiar voice, what a relief, it's Binghe! And he comes dashing up, wearing clothes like these other people but with a black inner layer rather than white, and he's got on an apron and shades, and it's Binghe, good ol' familiar li'l bro Binghe... who has pointy ears and fangs and when he takes his shades off his eyes are red now, and then he sees Masa freaking out he just... changes back to how he looked when he was spending time with him and Boss Tatsu. Ah-haha, what?

Meanwhile Binghe's so excited to see Tatsu-sensei and introduce him to Shizun and Binghe's new friends and look, Sensei, I'm not married yet, but I'm keeping house, please inspect my work! Also, um. Let’s get Tatsu-sensei and aniki some different clothes, I know you’re perfectly suitable for going out in public where you live, but you’re half naked here.

Tatsu probably gets checked for possession, curses, sealed powers, and the like a million times, all the while Binghe tries over and over to convince everyone that no, really, Tatsu-sensei is just Like That, he’s fully human and not cursed or a cultivator or anything, he’s just... like that. Really. It took Binghe awhile to figure it out, too. Beyond that... I dunno, I have the feeling that Tatsu would externally roll with all this while internally going ??? and worrying about how Miku’s doing while he’s he’s here. Is she eating all right, she’s not spending too much of the household budget on games is she, did he shake out the futon before he left...?

Meanwhile Masa... oh Masa. (climbs onto a stack of books to be tall enough, puts hands on his shoulders, and stares into his eyes) I’m sorry, you’re a fun character and an okay guy, but you are not smart, and SVSSS is going to take one look at you and slap you upside the head with six different wife plots. This is a man who’s going to learn about duel cultivation before he goes home, not even because I’m trying to start anything, but because I know in my heart that this is what would happen to him here.

On the plus side, he is proud that his li’l bro’s doing so well for himself and is apparently part of one of the biggest, most successful organizations around. And Masa never really got why Binghe was so into this Shizun guy, and he still kinda doesn’t, but (from Masa’s perspective) Binghe’s well on his way to being the wife of the second in command of this group, and that’s nothing to sneeze at, so good for him. And hey, Binghe’s got some some subordinates (Mobei-jun, Liu Qingge, and Sha Hualing) of his own that seem pretty tough, congrats!

Binghe: They’re my friends, aniki.

Masa: Then how come they do what you say?

Binghe: (trying to think of a polite way to say ‘I’m the smart one of the guys and Sha Hualing only really listens if she thinks it’s funny’)

Meanwhile Tatsu’s off learning xianxia laundry techniques and subtly getting tested for demonic possession again.

Thanks for the ask!

[qserasera]

My dream svsss live action (cont)

Part 2

part 1 for my headcanon live action cast here

the last post didn’t have enough room to include all the characters, so here’s the rest of ‘who would i cast in a liveaction svsss drama’ thoughts and why

Shen Yuan - ?? or Bai Jingting

pic from my drama list here. i don’t have the Strongest opinion on the actor for shen yuan because he would only be in like. a few scenes at the beginning. i think bai jingting could do a reasonably good job, since he knows how to. hmm how to describe it...do comedic face journeys in a way that still feels true to a historical period drama?? like he knows how to be funny without coming off as too modern.  he’s also doing an Excellent job as a main role in Chang Feng Du, for anyone who’s asking. otherwise some other actor from a youth drama/college setting drama could probably be a nice candidate, if they know how to switch from serious/air of slightly disdainful cynicism to Peak Comedy and obliviousness at the drop of a hat (which i wouldn’t know bc i don’t watch a ton of modern cdramas ; w ; )

Yue Qingyuan - Tony Leung

no thoughts, head empty, who else can exude guilt and yearning like a sexy, sexy cologne??? for yqy it would be Nice to have an actor who can pull off the competent smiling look with an air of hidden melancholy and. like. yep.

Ning Yingying - Amy Sun

she did a good job in the eternal love series (totally different drama from the one about the peach blossoms and 3 lives). i honestly had mixed feelings about the show, but i did watch at least two season of it so. who knows. she was very good as jing xin with the scenes she was given, even tho i bounced off the actual heroine’s personality type completely

Liu Mingyan - Kira Shi

not much commentary here!! this was just on general looks and acting feel probably. haven’t seen her specifically in any fight-heavy/wuxia shows (but i did watch weaving a tale of love and story of minglan) so. i think for looks, she does contrast pretty distinctly from the above ning yingying casting, idk idk

Liu Qingge - Li Hongyi

if you need someone to play like. a seemingly more pretty but delicate look warrior while also being dangerous, he can do that! his acting skills would pretty much be up to task, etc etc

Sha Hualing - Tang Wei

confession time is that i haven’t actually. watched lust, caution which she starred in (which i heard was very good and also got her blocked out of a lot of other acting projects afterwards), but i do think her overall face profile has the right vibe

(Guest Role) Su Xiyan - Dilraba Dilmurat

i just liked how she played her main role in the long ballad, and dilraba also knows how to give off that no-nonsense competent aura as a heroine while also being emotive for romantic-type storylines and passionate feelings

(Guest Role) Tianlang-jun - Wallace Huo

you need an emperor-type actor with capriciousness, humor, danger and vulnerability??? it’s him.....he would be so so so good, i know this in my heart!!! (for a sample of his acting, there is a clip from the ruyi drama here u could check out)

[person-behind-books]

luo binghe is reborn after an infinity of war and sex.

his first memory is pain and his first thought is that this must be his penance for his life of indulgence without a care for others.

as his body grows older and becomes capable of understanding it’s surroundings he learns that he is in some kind of infirmary and the eternal warms that blankets him is spiritual qi, constantly fed to him.

as he soon learns his new form is female it causes him discomfort. it feels so wrong - the memory of centuries in his male body fresh in his mind.

adding to that that he is in the body of an apparently very ill toddler he isn’t having a very pleasant experience.

because of the doctors around him constantly giving him qi a core manifests within his second year reborn - something unheard of and practically impossible - but he soon learns that it doesn’t give him any advantages since he can’t use his core at all because all it’s energy goes towards keeping him alive.

but not long after that his little brother is born and he is in love.

in all his years alive all luo binghe wanted - deep down where he’d never even admit it to himself - was to be loved.

his parent’s this life clearly cherish him but they hate each other too much for him to have a happy time with them.

so for him chubby, ugly, and loud a-cheng is the greatest gift he’s ever gotten.

he had children in his previous life, grandchildren, great grandchildren and further but he’s never taken care of a baby.

so he has no idea what to do with a-cheng, not to mention that his weak failure of a body is only barely able to stand up by itself, but he loves cuddling with his and playing silly games.

they grow up as happy as can be in the lap of luxury, not as much as he had in his previous life.

then one day there is a-ying.

luo binghe had known his new father had been looking for something, it had made his new mother so mad, so he wasn’t surprised when they were introduced to a boy who was to be their sibling.

what did surprise him that they, apparently, weren’t blood related to him.

so together they grew up. a-cheng never good enough for their father, a-ying always the interloper to their mother, and binghe the dissapointment for his weak body and the pride for his calm, sweet, kind manner even at such a young age.

the second big change in this second life of his was when a-cheng and a-ying left for a year to study in gusu. he didn’t join because the cold would damage his health even further.

they send him lots of letters but he still missed them.

only after a-ying punched his fiance and broke the betrothal did he see them again when visiting them in gusu.

he neither liked nor disliked the betrothal to jin zixuan. he had always liked both men and women and he didn’t feel the same dislike that his brothers held towards jin zixuan. marriage also didn’t mean much to him anymore after his thousands of wifes so he didn’t have a problem to be married of. what he disliked however was that jin zixuan was a year younger than his body. 

hualing had been the only wife his same age for so long, after yingying died of old age - her cultivation simply giving out after six hundert years and mingyan following only fourty years later with a qi deviation so severe even binghe couldn’t safe her, before she died in battle - as glorious and bloody a death as she had been in life.

it simply wasn’t possible for others to be as old as him but he had never married or wanted to bed children.

so he wasn’t overly fond of the arrangement but didn’t mind it too much. still, he found this broken betrothal the more preferable option.

a few months after a-cheng and a-ying’s return from gusu there was another discussion conference.

nothing much out of the usual power play’s happened.

still he left that conference queasy.

then he got word from his spies that the wen’s attacked the lan sect and not long after that the heirs were called to qishan - an obvious ploy to create hostages and not two weeks later only one returned to him limping, starving, and exhausted.

her father went to safe his second brother and a week after he returned and left again, taking binghe with him, flames found his home and binge lost all he had loved this life in one night.

his body was weak but his mind wasn’t and he made it back to lotus pier in hours.

the flames were doused by the time he made his way home and wen’s under wen qing had taken control of his home.

wen qing was a beautiful cold lady and had she lived in his previous life she would have undoubtedly been part of his harem.

she received binghe with perfect manners and upon her request to free a-cheng only looked at her with those pretty and calculating eyes before a smile stole itself on her mouth and she broke out in pealing laughter. 

it sounded anything but happy.

part 2

[tossawary]

Chapter 29: “The Ringing Bells” of “pride is not the word I’m looking for” quotes and commentary. Not a full list of favorite quotes or full commentary.

-

It’s just been him, Yue Qingyuan, and the not-so-modest Qiong Ding entourage befitting Cang Qiong Mountain Sect’s leader. Shang Qinghua and Yue Qingyuan still haven’t talked about anything personal (Shang Qinghua kind of hopes they never will!), but putting up a united front and then putting up with other sects seems to have brought them closer together again.

If Shang Qinghua had given in to his idea of bringing a flask of emergency wine in his sleeve, they could have made a drinking game or something every time someone managed to “casually” mention that Zhao Hua Temple Sect’s barrier techniques were the best in the world. With that face Yue Qingyuan made after the third, ear-gouging hour of listening to a long line of Zhao Hua experts condescend to them about security measures that will surely stop invading demons in their tracks, Shang Qinghua would have bet the man could have been talked into it. Big Bro would have been down, he’s sure.

-

AN: There is something immensely amusing to me that Yue Qingyuan and Shang Qinghua of all people run this sect (like, sure, SQQ and WQW and the other peak lords do stuff too, but YQY and SQH seem to be the ones who actually deal with worldly affairs and interact with people). To me, they both have such “I don’t want to be here” energy. YQY would rather be thinking about his slow reconciliation with Shen Qingqiu, and SQH would rather be daydreaming about the sexy ice demon he’s been betraying the sect for for 20 years. 

But nooo, they have to be responsible. 

Yue Qingyuan nearly dying at the end of SVSSS to me had such... vibes of relief? This man is carrying SO MUCH stress over his position and his responsibilities and appearances, that his reaction to dying seems to be at least a little bit: “Oh, time to put everything down. I can give up. I don’t have to be the invincible sect leader above it all anymore. Thank goodness.” You can fit so much trauma and unhealthy ideation in this man! 

Which is, I think, why this connection between SQH and YQY was a little inevitable in this story. They’re both carrying so much stress and trauma, and doing their best to not let anyone see it, so they really relate to each other but... in a way that’s kind of one-sided on both parts? Because SQH isn’t supposed to know shit about YQY’s past or pressures. And YQY doesn’t have the full picture of what SQH is dealing with at all. After their fight after SQQ died and SQH coming forward about their invasion, SQH and YQY are finally getting to have some more direct connection, but neither of them are willing to put their masks down yet. It goes against their natures and their perceived duties (as sect leader and a transmigrator/traitor) to honestly confide in each other. 

YQY and SQH both kind of have a “I know better than you” thing going on here. Yue Qingyuan because he’s the sect leader and he’s been taught that he has to manage himself and everyone else. Shang Qinghua because he’s a transmigrator and also... the fallen creator god of this world? 

- 

Yue Qingyuan is apparently just as eager to make it home as Shang Qinghua is. Their travel pace puts them a full day ahead of schedule, and Yue Qingyuan courteously sends his youngest personal assistant ahead via flying sword to warn the sect.

“Shen-Shixiong and Wei-Shixiong will need time to hide the mess from all the parties they’ve been throwing in our absence,” Shang Qinghua jokes.

Yue Qingyuan looks at him with polite but concerned bemusement.

“Aha, never mind, I’ll just… go check the last report my head disciples sent me again.”

None of them are expecting the assistant, who flew off with all the energy and eagerness of youth, to return only a little over an hour later. The assistant is red in the face and panting for breath. He collapses in front of Yue Qingyuan.

“Shizun, I-! I turned back as soon as I saw- in the distance-! The sect was on fire! Qiong Ding Peak was on fire!”

Yue Qingyuan and Shang Qinghua exchange a look of shock. When Shang Qinghua joked at the beginning of their journey that the sect would probably set itself on fire without them there to do damage control, he really was only joking! He’s had way too much of the shit he says coming true on him!

-

AN: I don’t think I’ve mentioned this yet, but Yue Qingyuan’s youngest assistant is the kid that Shen Qingqiu shoved on him from the House of Rejuvenation mess. Qi Qingqi and Liu Qingge picked up Luo Fanli from that, Shen Qingqiu picked up Fu Qiang from that, and Yue Qingyuan got this kid. 

He doesn’t have a name yet, but he’ll probably get one at some point. Probably in Part 4 when Shen Yuan and Fu Qiang’s story comes to the forefront. 

-

“Shishu!”

Shang Qinghua turns and gets an armful of nephew. Binghe’s arms wrap around him with no care for the bandage around one of them and Binghe’s warm face is buried into his neck - he’s so tall now - to share his dirt stains.

Shang Qinghua has no idea what to do. He wants to hug his very huggable nephew, of course, but in front of so many people?! He can’t just shove Binghe away either! Luckily, Binghe seems to realize his mistake about two seconds after contact and launches away from Shang Qinghua, bowing deeply enough to hide his face completely.

“Apologies for tripping, Shishu!”

Shang Qinghua nearly laughs. “Ah, ah, it’s fine. It’s fine.”

This is probably one of the worst kept secrets in the sect, anyway.

-

AN: This is absolutely a reference to Binghe pulling this trick in SVSSS canon, only unlike SY, Shang Qinghua recognizes the excuse. 

-

Luo Binghe clears his throat and intervenes before his friend can accidentally kill Shang Qinghua with kindness or something. “The demon saintess Sha Hualing and her followers attacked.”

“Oh,” Shang Qinghua says, relaxing a little.

 “Is that all?” he thinks. “Phew! Earlier than I was expecting, but okay!”

-

AN: It’s very funny to me to have CQMS going, “Demon attack! Demon attack! Totally unexpected demon attack!” And Shang Qinghua going, “Shit, I think I put that down on my calendar wrong. Did I put that down on my calendar...?” 

-

This apparently prompted Liu Mingyan and Luo Fanli to volunteer at the same time.

“They looked like they were going to argue over it, at first, or even fight over it,” Luo Binghe says. “Qi-Shigu and Liu-Shishu didn’t seem to want to let them fight, but they just ignored them and almost started a quick hand-game over who would get to fight. And then the demoness said… she said… she...”

“What?” Shang Qinghua asks.

Ning Yingying lifts her nose to the sky and declares, “She said: ‘If I get a say in this, I want to fight the pretty one in the veil, and not the old lady!’ So rude!”

“...Ah,” Shang Qinghua says again.

That explains the awkward grimace Binghe is making right now.

“Liu-Shijie and Luo-Shijie froze, then Luo-Shijie just looked at Shizun and Qi-Shigu and Liu-Shishu,” Ning Yingying continues. “ Snap! And then it was really quiet. And then Shizun said, ‘I’ll allow it.’ And Qi-Shigu and Liu-Shishu and even Liu-Shijie didn’t say anything.”

“Of course not! Shizun outranks them,” Ming Fan says.

As though that has ever honestly mattered to Liu Qingge or Qi Qingqi.

“So she got to fight the demoness,” Luo Binghe says, like it was a foregone conclusion that his stubborn auntie would get what she wanted. Who’s surprised about this? Not this long-suffering nephew!

-

AN: So, Sha Hualing made the “old lady” joke in front of 1) Qi Qingqi, Luo Fanli’s teacher who knows about her student’s past with the House of Rejuvenation, 2) Liu Mingyan, Luo Fanli’s friend who either knows about it or recognizes that LFL is touchy about her age, 3) Liu Qingge, LFL’s brother-in-law who also knows, and 4) Shen Qingqiu, who was THERE and that’s how they met. 

So, there’s sort of a collective, “If we don’t let Luo Fanli try to beat the shit out of this demon girl, we will never hear the fucking end of it,” here. 

Also, as soon as I made Luo Fanli into Liu Qingge’s apprentice of sorts, there was no way that she was NOT going to want to fight Sha Hualing, and it seemed a good way to shake things up from canon while also doing some stuff with the Fanli & Binghe relationship. I’m really trying to breathe new life into all the scenes that I’m redoing from SVSSS. 

-

“She kicked that demoness’ ass!” Ning Yingying squeals.  

“Ning Yingying!” Ming Fan hisses.

Shang Qinghua snorts. “Oh? Really?”

“It was rough,” Luo Binghe says, while Ning Yingying and Ming Fan both turn bright red realizing what she just said in front of a Peak Lord. Binghe, however, has totally heard Shang Qinghua say way worse than that. “The demoness was really good and really mean, and she kept getting up even after she got slammed into the ground, but eventually she got pinned and had to forfeit to keep her head. Fanli is still mostly in one piece. She’s over there right now with Mu-Shishu and Liu-Shishu.”

Shang Qinghua follows his nephew’s finger, then winces. His little sister-in-law looks pretty roughed up, her face is beginning to swell and she’s got a lot of claw marks, but she’s grinning up at Liu Qingge. Liu Qingge looks totally fine, besides some flecks of blood that must belong to other people, and is smiling down at her.

Mu Qingfang looks less than enthusiastic about all this as he treats Luo Fanli’s injuries of victory.

Aha, yeah, Liu Qingge is definitely the one explaining this to Luo Jiahui later.

-

AN: I really like building and having built up all these relationships. I like giving Binghe friends, even if they’re friends that he kind of runs rings around given his manipulative tendencies (NYY and MF rely on just grabbing him at this point and relying on sheer force of obliviousness/authority). I like giving Liu Qingge more connections in the form of Luo Fanli and Mu Qingfang too. 

This cast is... so big at this point. I didn’t really expect this when I started. 

-

Inside the cell is… a bloody demon girl who looks about fifteen-ish (sixteen-ish, maybe?), with dark hair in many braids, a sharp face and a sharper stare, and clothing that looks like it was made out of not nearly enough silk ribbons. Ah, wow, that’s way more skin than Shang Qinghua ever wanted to see of Sha Hualing. No jewelry at all, though, not even a belt. Not even boots or even slippers. Just lots of blood splatter.

Both Sha Hualing’s arms and legs have been restrained. She’s also been muzzled, though that doesn’t stop her from showing off her teeth in the least happy-looking smile anyone has ever smiled. There’s blood in Sha Hualing’s teeth! That’s blood there smeared around her mouth!

Qi Qingqi is in the cell too, utterly unimpressed, making sure that Sha Hualing is properly restrained and even treating an injury on the girl’s thigh. Demons are pretty tough, Sha Hualing would probably be fine, but Shang Qinghua supposes they can at least be a little kind toward the poor disciple who’ll have to mop the floors here later.

“So good of you to finally join us,” Shen Qingqiu says to Shang Qinghua. His voice is dry, as usual, but it might be missing its worst sharp edges? The man seems pleased at having caught himself a demon.

“Ah, I didn’t want to show up the sect leader with my speed,” Shang Qinghua replies.

That gets an amused look from Yue Qingyuan. “Let us speak elsewhere,” he says, politely admonishing everyone to shut up in front of their guest. “Qi-Shimei?”

“A moment,” Qi Qingqi says.

“Oh, don’t leave me all alooone,” Sha Hualing says, only slightly muffled by the muzzle, her eyes going wide and scared. “I’ll behave! This is really too much! These restraints are hurting me. Please… it’s making it hard for me to breathe, please…”  

Qi Qingqi ignores her and finishes up her work.

Yue Qingyuan lets the Xian Shu Peak Lord out and then seals the cell behind her. Shang Qinghua is familiar with those seals and yeah, there’s very little chance Sha Hualing is getting out of there on her own. The demoness complains loudly about being left behind in a cold and lonely cell. Shang Qinghua can still hear her wailing as Yue Qingyuan instructs the guards on, mainly, not letting anyone in and not taking any of Sha Hualing’s bait no matter what lies she tells.

If anyone gets “seduced” by that teenage girl - a trick pulled many times by the wily Sha Hualing in Proud Immortal Demon Way - Shang Qinghua is going to be so disappointed. Surprised? Not really! But still… depressingly disappointed!

- 

AN: It was... hm... important to me that none of the characters here actually sexualize Sha Hualing or disregard the fact that she’s very young to them. In his narration, Shang Qinghua mentions her skimpy clothes and the possibility of her seducing a guard, but it’s with the casual detachment of someone who was writing a stallion novel and knows the tropes. 

I wanted to focus more on the fact that Sha Hualing is not just a “wife character”, but an extremely dangerous non-human individual and already a minor political player, if currently trying to play outside her league. She’s an enemy. Also, just because she is currently playing outside her league doesn’t mean that she’s not dangerous and shouldn’t be taken seriously. 

All she needs is someone to get close and she will inflict life-long injuries. 

I also wanted to use her here for some Mobei-Jun stuff, which I’ll talk about later when I get to the Mobei-Jun part. 

-

“Shang-Shidi, do you recognize any of these materials?” Shen Qingqiu asks next, like he’s reading Shang Qinghua’s mind now! He looks so unimpressed by Shang Qinghua’s startle. “You are, after all, one of our experts on tracking down the source of such strange things.”

“Aha, off the top of my head? I couldn’t say! But… I would suspect part of this weapon came from the far north of the Demon Realm...”

Wei Qingwei finally looks up. “I would make the same guess,” he says, like a real bro. “If only this weapon hadn’t broken, we could have tested its limits of disruption! But our plans have been disrupted there… I’d like to see how something like this would go up against the different types of barriers out there.”

“Zhao Hua Temple’s barriers, perhaps?” Shen Qingqiu suggests.

Yue Qingyuan audibly sighs.

“Of course, they won’t wish to see proof that there are demon lords preparing to invade,” Shen Qingqiu says icily. “How remiss of me to forget that fact. What does it matter if a demon lord’s daughter was swinging around a previously unseen weapon like a child’s favorite new toy?”

-

AN: So, when I say that I want to breathe new life into the canon scenes that I’m redoing and reinterpreting, my goal for this one was to really... build up the upcoming Immortal Alliance Conference and actually connect Sha Hualing’s invasion to... well... anything. 

In SVSSS, Sha Hualing’s invasion happening is just following PIDW events apparently, and SVSSS in my opinion isn’t... really too interested in PIDW worldbuilding or Sha Hualing’s character from the standpoint that this really is a real world now. It’s all about Shen Yuan reliving the PIDW plot. 

So, if I’ve put 200,000+ words at this point into actually trying to establish that this is a real world, these are real people, there are real long-lasting politics and sect relations, that world elements aren’t just spawning into existence when the plot needs them and exist now, even if I’ve been doing so kind of as a joke because I think it’s funny to make Shang Qinghua deal with that, I wanted to actually try to place and connect Sha Hualing’s invasion to other story elements and place Sha Hualing’s character in relation to the others. 

Here, Sha Hualing’s invasion is a spoiled and violent child looking to make herself look good and cause trouble, as it is in SVSSS, but here it’s emphasized that Sha Hualing really is 1) a child, 2) a demon lord’s child, and 3) a future demon lord herself. And Sha Hualing is showing off her family’s inventions in preparation for the Immortal Alliance Conference. This is a move that has consequences for her and for Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, and will continue to have consequences for her (partially indebted to MBJ’s clan) and for Cang Qing Mountain Sect (it makes them look bad in front of the other Great Sects). 

-

“Shang-Shidi, do you recognize any of these materials?” Shen Qingqiu asks next, like he’s reading Shang Qinghua’s mind now! He looks so unimpressed by Shang Qinghua’s startle. “You are, after all, one of our experts on tracking down the source of such strange things.”

“Aha, off the top of my head? I couldn’t say! But… I would suspect part of this weapon came from the far north of the Demon Realm...”

Wei Qingwei finally looks up. “I would make the same guess,” he says, like a real bro. “If only this weapon hadn’t broken, we could have tested its limits of disruption! But our plans have been disrupted there… I’d like to see how something like this would go up against the different types of barriers out there.”

“Zhao Hua Temple’s barriers, perhaps?” Shen Qingqiu suggests.

Yue Qingyuan audibly sighs.

“Of course, they won’t wish to see proof that there are demon lords preparing to invade,” Shen Qingqiu says icily. “How remiss of me to forget that fact. What does it matter if a demon lord’s daughter was swinging around a previously unseen weapon like a child’s favorite new toy?”

-

AN: Me to myself: “...Is there canonical evidence that Mobei-Jun can read and write???” Because, like, the impression I get from this guy is that he basically raised himself and barely survived, so the System could interpret that to make an AU in which MBJ never learned to read or write. 

Mobei-Jun can read and write in “pride is not the word I’m looking for”, Shang Qinghua is just exaggerating here because he’s a little miffed. 

But it’s kind of tempting to write an AU now in which SQH realizes early-on in knowing MBJ that... his king can’t really read or write... his upbringing was so shitty and his father was so careless that MBJ never learned more than a few words that he picked up from context. That’s fucking horrifying. MBJ’s poor socialization and communication levels reach new heights! 

-

“It’s just that something like that happened before, remember, Uncle?” Binghe presses. “With the skinner demon? That same light and that same warm, almost burning feeling! It was different this time - that weapon wasn’t going to hit me, I was blocking it; I know that I was blocking it the right way - but it’s too similar, isn’t it?”

“It’s… very similar,” Shang Qinghua agrees slowly.

 “System?! Bro?! This is your fault!” he thinks. “Why the fuck are you leaving these explanations to me?! If you take points off me for any of this, you piece of shit, I’m going to find a way to strangle you, I swear! Preemptively: fuck off!”

Shang Qinghua lets himself visibly think about, trying to figure out what the fuck to say here. Binghe looks up at him like he’s trying to see into Shang Qinghua’s head to watch his thoughts come together. It’s a lot of pressure to put on a man all of a sudden! Binghe is too clever to be easily fooled by weak bullshit! How is a man supposed to come up with a decent lie under these circumstances?

“Well, ah, it’s happened when you’ve come into contact with demons who are trying to kill you, so it seems like it’s… some kind of unique reaction between that demonic energy and your spiritual energy,” Shang Qinghua says finally, because it’s better than explaining that there’s some shitty, no-good god-like being invested in a predestined plot. “Strange things happen sometimes in life-or-death situations, you know. Cultivators can accidentally pull off great feats sometimes when they’re desperate or panicked, without knowing how they did it.”

Binghe doesn’t look very reassured. Which makes sense, because a long-winded way of saying “I don’t know, it sounds like a freak accident to me” isn’t really reassuring.

-

AN: This, plus Sha Hualing’s invasion, is about Shang Qinghua’s coming up against the consequences of his choices. He can’t really have everything at once! He’s managed to have a lot all at once so far, but the time for Binghe’s demon reveal is coming closer, and Shang Qinghua is going to have to make some tough decisions and live with them. He’s going to have to deal with the people in his life having opinions on his tough decisions. 

Shang Qinghua is trying to keep the System happy, with his eyes on the end goal of keeping Binghe out of the Abyss, which makes him unwilling to take certain risks deviating from the plot. But, if you’re looking at it from the perspective of someone who doesn’t know about the System or the plot, Shang Qinghua’s decision-making seems completely illogical. 

Binghe is too clever not to at least notice that there’s some bullshit happening here. He doesn’t know what his uncle isn’t telling him, but Shang Qinghua isn’t the greatest bold-faced liar, so he knows there’s something. 

- 

At the end of the day, Shang Qinghua leaves his fellow Peak Lords (Shen Qingqiu, Qi Qingqi, Liu Qingge, and Tang Qingling) arguing in circles over cold trails (Yue Qingyuan is stuck refereeing, poor bastard). He returns to his Leisure House and finds a familiar ice demon lounging in his sitting room, eating some of his snacks.

“My king, did you help Sha Hualing escape?!” Shang Qinghua demands.

“She did not contribute,” Mobei-Jun answers.

Mobei-Jun looks good, like breaking in and out of Cang Qiong Mountain Sect last night was no trouble for him. Why would it be any trouble for him? He’s been doing it for years and years without getting caught, after all!

“How did you bypass the cell’s seals so cleanly?” Shang Qinghua wonders, as he puts some papers aside and kicks off his boots.

The cell doors hadn’t been ripped off its hinges, just… taken off like they were never attached… which combined with the ice-related injuries on the guards, plus the fact that the intruder slipped in like a shadow and left the same way, kind of gave the whole thing away.

Mobei-Jun raises his eyebrows. “You have shown me many such protections.”

“Ah… yeah… I guess I did do that.”

-

AN: Presenting Sha Hualing as I did: a dangerous and political figure even though she’s only a teenager, was also meant to reflect on Shang Qinghua’s relationship with Mobei-Jun. Mobei-Jun is the enemy. Mobei-Jun may be on Shang Qinghua’s side and his own side, but he is not on Cang Qiong Mountain Sect’s side and he has loyalties to people in direct opposition to Cang Qiong Mountain Sect. 

Sha Hualing is, in many ways, Mobei-Jun’s people. He’s completely unfazed by her violence. To him, Sha Hualing’s behavior is normal and expected, if the foolishness and arrogance of someone trying to act grown-up. He is not human. He is from a completely different world to Shang Qinghua. 

And their separate worlds are now colliding. 

Shang Qinghua really can’t have everything he wants here. He’s a traitor and, realistically, he can’t expect that not to come out sooner or later. He’s making decisions for the sect (releasing SHL to prevent another demon invasion (and also to keep the plot on track)) that Yue Qingyuan might have agreed with if he knew the full picture of SQH’s spying (all he knows at the moment is that SQH has informants), but that YQY doesn’t know about and so can’t agree with, so SQH is acting beyond his authority letting MBJ break SHL out. 

It’s a mess! It’s not sustainable! Shang Qinghua’s old character role and his new character role can’t continue to coexist like this. 

-

Thinking of worrying unnecessarily, desperate to change the subject away from the looming plot, Shang Qinghua brings up the very important subject of Mobei-Jun possibly, maybe, if he has the time, letting him know when to expect him, when he’s going somewhere, and when he’ll be back. He’s brought this up before, though mostly in a “my king, this humble servant would really appreciate it if you at least learned to knock, but if that’s too much to ask, it’s fine, it’s really fine, never mind, forget I brought it up” kind of way.

He only realizes just how daring it sounds after he says it! He’s always kind of figured that the proud Mobei-Jun would take offense to the concept of being at Shang Qinghua’s beck and call in any way. Why would Mobei-Jun need to explain himself?

“Why?” Mobei-Jun even says.

“...Why?” Shang Qinghua repeats, kind of hoping that he wouldn't have to explain the things he asks for. Mobei-Jun said he could ask for things, but he has to explain himself too? That's really too much. “I didn’t get to see you at all while I was gone! I got back and I didn’t know when I’d get to see you again, my king.”

This gets him another random pinch to the cheek, but it also gets him another surprising kiss. Mobei-Jun is apparently not even a little bit offended by this request. So it’s fine! This one thing, at least, is really fine.

-

AN: But Mobei-Jun is also becoming one of SQH’s rocks in many ways! This relationship is new and exciting and comforting! Giving up or betraying Mobei-Jun is completely out of the question for Shang Qinghua. 

I’m kind of fucking loving these secret forbidden romance vibes. 

If Shang Qinghua asked, Mobei-Jun would whisk him away from everything right now, but he understands that Shang Qinghua needs to be here for his nephew, his sister-in-laws, and his students. With his father as king, Mobei-Jun doesn’t have the position or authority yet to make any kind of peace with CQMS. MBJ’s relationship with SQH could get him in deep shit with his father, with his uncle, and with other demon lords. 

Shang Qinghua is a filthy traitor and he’s dragging MBJ down with him. 

[delicioussshame]

Socialite AU, last part! I finished a thing! Also posted on AO3 now that it’s done.

Shen Yuan had expected that the beginning of the school year would have kept Luo Binghe too busy for them to see each other more than, oh, about once a month, but it doesn’t seem to be the case. Luo Binghe is obviously very smart, so maybe that’s why he can keep up so easily. His studies sure don’t seem to stop him from having Shen Yuan over at least once a week.

Luo Binghe says it’s because he cannot trust Shen Yuan to feed himself properly, something Shen Yuan himself has profusely denied. First, he’s a fully grown adult, he can cook! Second, if he doesn’t feel like it, he can order in, or pay someone to cook for him. There are no issues there! He doesn’t need to be minded.

Not that he minds being minded. Shen Yuan has eaten more than his share of delicious food, and Luo Binghe’s stands above the rest. There are worst things than travelling to Luo Binghe’s apartment and eating a freshly cooked meal.

They don’t talk about novels as much though. This is an area where Luo Binghe had to step back in favor of reading assigned manuals. Shen Yuan has spent more than one evening reading trash by himself while Luo Binghe sat nearby, throwing the occasional question his way as he studied. Not that it seemed like he needed the help.

When does he see his college friends, Shen Yuan has no idea. Luo Binghe always waves away any concern of his on this matter. Seriously, Shen Yuan is a bit worried. Does he not fit in? It seems impossible that someone as charming, not to mention as affluent, as him would be ostracised. Even Shen Yuan had managed to gather a small group of friends during his college years. Luo Binghe must have done the same, no?

If he hasn’t, his fellow students are missing out.

In that case, Shen Yuan will take him out it their place. It wouldn’t do for Binghe to be lonely.

Not that that’s likely, considering how popular he is in their circle. As far as his female compatriots are concerned, Luo Binghe is now Beijing’s most eligible bachelor.

It’s a role that suits Luo Binghe’s public persona to a tee. He flutters between ladies as if he were born into in, flirting with one and laughing with another one with an ease Shen Yuan cannot help but envy, considering his own limited contacts with the other sex.

If those interactions often ended with a pretend fight between them, neither of them would complain about it. It was fun. Much better than insulting real people and wondering later if he’d gone too far, if he’d seriously hurt someone whose crime had only been to be born in a shitty family and raised in a similarly shitty fashion. He and Binghe sometimes rehearsed lines late into the night before a party, sentences that were meant to be biting insults turning into uncontrollable laughter.

Everything was going well. Shen Yuan’s reputation was becoming so toxic it had been weeks since the last time one of his fellow socialites had dared to speak to him, which is how Shen Yuan liked it. As for Luo Binghe, he was both admired for standing up to mean Shen Yuan, and pitied for always being the receptor of his ire. Binghe was more than talented enough to use all of it to his advantage.

All in all, everything was going perfectly.

Until now. “Excuse me?” says Shen Yuan with the coldest, most disparaging tone he has managed yet.

Sha Hualing, sadly, doesn’t seem impressed. “You can deny it all you want. It’s obvious. It must drive you crazy, seeing him with us and knowing you’ll never have a chance. He’s so good, too. Made me scream so loud I’m sure the neighbors heard. Not that you’ll ever find out yourself. Keep pulling his pigtails. He knows, he’s just too nice to tell how pathetic you are.”

Shen Yuan cannot convey to Sha Hualing how utterly from left field her theory is, and how completely baffled he is, without breaking his carefully maintained aura of disgusted condescension, but he really wishes he could. “You’re insane. How could I be attracted to… that.” He winces in his head. Too much? There are probably zero people that don’t feel at least a little attracted to Luo Binghe in this room.

But if there was one, it would be him. Luo Binghe is his cute disciple and friend, not his meal ticket. Leave that to Sha Hualing and her posse.

Her answering laugh is haughty. “Not even you believe that. Anyway, I just wanted to rub it in, but now that that’s done, I got better things to do than talking to you, like him. Fuck off.”

He flips her off as she leaves. Not his most elegant moment, but not the most elegant situation.

How the fuck did she get into her sick mind that he was into Luo Binghe. She should have thought they hated each other! That they wanted to tear each other’s throats open, not tear each other’s clothes off!

… Holy fuck their characters have ust, haven’t they? Danmei isn’t his playing field, but some things are universal across gender. There is an undeniable pull to seeing two hot people seeming like they’re two seconds away from punching each other when it also seems like they might be two seconds away from… something else.

It’s the only possible interpretation. They haven’t been careful enough, and now their roles are tainted by bad tropes!

Shen Yuan is going to have to adapt his persona a bit. Let himself run even colder. Less hate, more indifference, maybe? Or maybe he could just leave Luo Binghe alone for a few parties.

It wouldn’t work! It would seem like he chickened out after Sha Hualing confronted him! It would make it appear weak!

Could he make up a girlfriend?

Nah, no one would believe it.

Fuck, he’s going to need Luo Binghe’s help on this one.

_________________

“She what!?”

“Thinks I keep picking fights with you because I’m trying to get your attention and that I’d really like for you to bend me over something, probably.”

Luo Binghe blushes bright red.

Shen Yuan restrains his mirth. Nice to see he’s not the only one terribly embarrassed by the situation!

Yes, pinching those red cheeks would only make things worse, but he’s still very tempted.

Shen Yuan soldiers on. “Binghe shouldn’t worry about things too much. His reputation is safe. Considering how well he gets on with the fairer sex,” and yes, now Shen Yuan knows way more than he ever wanted to know about Sha Hualing’s sex life, but that’s life,” no one will doubt him. If he has no idea, I’ll think of something. It’s not his problem.”

“Shizun’s problems are my problems! He wouldn’t be in this situation if it wasn’t for me!”

Aww, Binghe, why is your indignation so cute!” Don’t blame yourself. We both agreed to the plan. It’s no one’s fault.”

Luo Binghe looks down, obviously still embarrassed. “I really have no idea where she got that. Shizun never appears to be attracted to me.”

“Who knows how Sha Hualing thinks. She probably watches too much porn.” He wouldn’t be surprised, considering how low-class she acted.

A second later, he catches his mistake. If Luo Binghe is… seeing her, he shouldn’t be that mean to her in his presence. “Sorry for insulting your… friend.” He doesn’t think they’re officially dating? Sha Hualing would never shut up about it, and anyway Luo Binghe wouldn’t have as much time for Shen Yuan if he was serious about someone. It’s probably just hormones raging.

Luo Binghe shakes his head. “Shizun shouldn’t apologise! She’s the one who was this rude! Implying Shizun doesn’t know how to court someone, or that he’d need such a ridiculous approach when a few words would be enough for him to have anyone! What a stupid woman.”

It’s Shen Yuan’s turn to be embarrassed. Luo Binghe is pushing the hero worship a little too far here. He’s got way more experience in that department than Shen Yuan will ever get, probably. “Well, if you don’t like her, maybe choose someone better as a partner? You could have anyone. I know it’s none of my business, and I guess she’s attractive, but really, so are many others who don’t share her… fiery temperament.”

If he were honest, he’d just tell Binghe he deserves better.

Much, much better. Didn’t he see her chatting with Liu Mingyan the other day? Now that’s a woman worthy of his Binghe, almost his equal in all fields.

Not that he needs to find someone just yet. He should take his time, and find someone he likes.

Luo Binghe snorts. “I would never choose her.”

Shen Yuan blinks. “Didn’t you?”

Luo Binghe looks wounded. “Why would you think that? I would never be with someone this cruel to Shizun!”

“But she said… oh.” Shen Yuan is an idiot. Why, why did he, even for a second, believe what that snake said? “Binghe must let me apologise. I’ve been stupid and have believed her when she said you and her were… involved.”

“Shizun mustn’t believe her! She lies!”

Shen Yuan pats Luo Binghe’s back gently. “I don’t! I don’t. She lied. I don’t believe her anymore. Of course Binghe has better tastes than this. I should have known.”

Luo Binghe raises his chin. “I do. I have the best tastes.”

Shen Yuan lets a smile appears on his face. “You do. After all, you have chosen me to guide you.”

Luo Binghe nods with almost comical vigour. “Yes!”

So! Cute! Shen Yuan wants to give him a hug!

He won’t, because he’s the dignified older friend.

Who reads bad online novels, but let’s not linger on that. “So, what do we do about her imagination? Because she cannot keep a secret to save her life, so I expect people will talk about it the next time we attend the same event.”

“…Does Shizun want… a girlfriend?”

What does that have to do with anything. “If I meet the right person, sure. Why?”

“Does it matter what they think? They never cared about Shizun to begin with. Who cares if they think he’s attracted to me. It doesn’t change a thing.”

Well, yes, but. “It makes me look pretty pathetic. It’s not exactly a fun reputation to have.”

“What does?”

“That I want someone and the best thing I can do about it is insulting them? It does make me look like a kindergartener.”

An unholy light appears in Luo Binghe’s eyes. “So what if that wasn’t the best thing you had done?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Shizun feels pathetic because he doesn’t like the idea that people think he wants someone and he doesn’t know how to get them, right? But what if he did?”

Shen Yuan is very confused right now. “Binghe?”

“We knew each other before that first party, right? So I let them know that. We could be bitter exes!”

Shen Yuan looks at him, completely frozen. “Binghe, no.” That is 100% a terrible idea.

“Why not? It would explain everything! Why we’re so mean to each other while I’m nice to everyone else, why you’re worst to me, and why there’s tension between us!”

There is no tension between them! They’re playing characters! “People would think you’re gay!”

“I’ve been flirting with women all the time. People would think I’m bi.”

“You’ve just told me you haven’t been dating! What if they think you’re hung up on me, who, by the way, is a man!”

“Is it that bad? I wouldn’t mind. Shizun is someone I would certainly be hung on if he had left me.”

“So I’m the one who left you now? That makes even less sense! Why would someone like me leave someone like you! Of course Binghe is the one who left!”

“If I were dating Shizun, I would never leave him! He has to be the one who left me!”

Shen Yuan rubs his temples. He knew the conversation wouldn’t be simple, but it has reached unprecedented levels of nonsense. “Let’s forget who left who. We’re not doing that. Binghe would ruin his reputation to only slightly better mine. That makes no sense.”

Luo Binghe pouts. “It would have worked. I would have made a very good ex-boyfriend.”

Shen Yuan pats his back again. “I’m sure you would have. I, on the other hand, would probably have been terrible at it.”

“Why?”

“How could I have pretended to not only have dated Binghe, but to have separated from him? No one would believe it. My talents aren’t up to the task. I can’t make myself look like a plausible boyfriend to Binghe.”

Luo Binghe sighs. “That’s stupid. Shizun might as well have been my boyfriend lately.”

Shen Yuan feels a headache coming. He can barely follow the logic of this conversation. “Binghe, I don’t understand.”

“Shen Yuan spends most of his evenings with me. I cook for him. He takes me out. We’ve been writing to each other for months. He’s been carefully curating my reading lists for most of those months. He has plenty of reasons why I would be dating him.”

Okay, let’s just ignore most of that. “Nothing you listed has anything to do with the character we play for those society functions? High society Shen Yuan probably only reads classic literature, when he’s not working his high-power job and, I don’t know, checking stocks or playing the guqin. Nothing appealing there. How would we have even met?”

“Via work? Maybe you had a meeting with some executive of my father. Considering my reputation, we probably just had sex and ended up dating later on.”

Shen Yuan tries to imagine being the kind of person who would see Luo Binghe and think he could just hit that.

Impossible. Does not compute. “Look, I’m just going to ignore it. It’s always worked before. We probably shouldn’t change it.”

“But things always staying the same is bad! They must evolve!”

Shen Yuan shrugs. “Not necessarily. My life has mostly remained the same since I’ve graduated, and it’s perfectly fine.”

Luo Binghe flinches like a kicked puppy. “Is my arrival so unimportant to Shizun?”

Fuck. “No! That’s not what I meant! I mostly meant my romantic life!” Not really, he meant his life his general, but it is quite insulting to Binghe to imply he had no impact on his life, not to mention just an outright lie.

“That, too, should change.”

“It sure won’t if everyone thinks I’m gay.”

Under Luo Binghe’s breath, barely audible to Shen Yuan, “It’s not exactly an impediment.” Then, louder. “Let’s tell them the truth, then.”

Shen Yuan instantly panics. “Binghe, they can’t know the truth, it’ll fuck everythin-“

And that’s when Luo Binghe’s tongue finds its way into Shen Yuan’s mouth.

Shen Yuan’s mind freezes completely.

Luo Binghe keeps on kissing him.

Shen Yuan’s mind keeps trying to reboot.

Luo Binghe pushes back and sighs. “Does Shizun understand now?”

Nope. “…We can’t be exes if we’re kissing?”

“Forget the exes. Let’s just tell them we’re having sex. That’ll be the true part. We’ll just tell them it’s hate sex. I’ll tell them you’re just that good and I can’t resist you. That way, you won’t be pathetic, right?”

Shen Yuan’s slowly rebooting mind cannot decide if the “reputation for being gay” part would outweigh the “reputation for having seduced Luo Binghe” part.

Wait. “We’re having sex?”

Luo Binghe falters. “If you want to? Because I want to. A lot. But we’re pretty much dating and Shen Yuan didn’t seem to realise, so I thought maybe he’s not attracted to me, but you keep acting like I’m the best thing that ever happened to you when really, the reverse is true, and can we date already? Please?”

Shen Yuan opens his mouth.

Shen Yuan closes his mouth.

Shen Yuan tries to understand that, apparently, Luo Binghe has been trying to date him? Him? Luo Binghe? And him? As a couple? That is a thing that is apparently on the table?

Wait, Shen Yuan actually is a person who could have looked and Luo Binghe and have hit that!?

Woah.

“I…”

Luo Binghe’s eyes grow even wider as he waits for Shen Yuan’s response.

As if Shen Yuan ever had the capacity to tell Binghe no.

As if he ever wanted to. “Okay. Let’s try it.”

A second later, he gets an armful of overenthusiastic Binghe trying to choke him with too much tongue.

“But we’re not playing bitter exes.” Shen Yuan really has no belief in his ability to pretend he left Luo Binghe.

That he had him and is devastated he doesn’t anymore, sure. But that he’d manage to be cruel to Luo Binghe about it? There’s no way.

“That’s fine. I like the one with the hate sex much better anyway.”

To be honest, so does Shen Yuan.

_________________

Shen Yuan positions himself in such a way that he can track Luo Binghe’s movements across the room without looking like he’s doing more than reading on his phone.

He can tell from Sha Hualing’s particularly vicious grin that she’s about to deliver what she considers to be a crippling blow to his reputation.

He thrills when the expression melts, replaced by horror as Luo Binghe’s face turn sheepish. He can almost hear his embarrassed tone as he admits to the moral failing that is sleeping with Shen Yuan, universal pariah.

He can distinctly hear the cries of dismay and what he knows are roars of utter jealousy.

None of it shows on his face, but Shen Yuan grins.

[annaisu]

Don’t You Know (That I’m Yours) - Read and React Ch 3

Don’t You Know That I’m Yours By chaoticgoodlawyer @chaoticgoodlawyerwrites Read and React |<  << Chapter 3 >>

(Sorry this took so long!!! Fought with homework, and then some personal mistakes I made, whoops >_< These are really long - I might start splitting them into 2 parts for each chapter?)

It didn’t quite hit Shen Qingqiu until the next day that Luo Binghe had kissed him.

His disciple had kissed him.

 Yes. Yes he did. 😏

 He had more than enough things to be concerned with, but, after having happily consumed Binghe’s morning congee, it was all he could think about.

Pfffft!!! That sure took a while to sink in! 😂 😂 He had to sleep on it before he could even begin to process the fact that it had happened! XD XD

How inappropriate!

…Buddy. I, uh. Have to tell you that the kiss is only slightly more inappropriate than the rest of what you've got going on, and boy, are you going to nonchalantly do far more on your own without realizing later 😅 😅 😅

Good thing you two are so cute together, and can complement each other so well!

Oh, God. Unless he was wildly misinterpreting his and Ning Yingying’s relationship in this timeline, that was Binghe’s first kiss.

😏 😏 😏 It would have been yours, too, if it weren't for that alternate husband of yours stealing most of your firsts already!! 😏

Okay, this was definitely somehow his fault.

I mean. It was definitely inspired by how you were talking yourself down? But it's not actually your fault. Mostly. Because I know you, SQQ – don't try to take full blame for everything!!!

Shen Qingqiu had known he was relying on Luo Binghe too much, that he was too weak to resist the siren call of comfort he had gotten during the brief hours he had a spouse to claim. Now that he had a taste of what it felt like to be held in simple affection, he craved it, specifically from the person he cared for above all others.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!! awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

But that person was someone he had absolutely no business wanting anything from.

Ah- 💔

What, no!!! Yes, he is!!! Binghe specifically wants to be someone you can desire and want from!!! He's cultivating himself to offer you as much as possible!!! You'll be doing him a disservice if you ignore all of it!!!

On some level, Shen Qingqiu acknowledged what Luo Binghe had told him the night before.

…I doubt it's a very high level, but progress is progress!

The boy… the young man thought he loved him in a way that probably felt real and intense to him.

…..good thing LBH isn't here to hear that and prove just how real and intense his love truly is.

A not insignificant part of him wanted to accept his words at face value, to believe that Luo Binghe would always choose him if given the option.

❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ He would!!! He will!!!

The problem was that Luo Binghe didn’t even know his other options.

I mean… he's already met the main 3 leads from his possible harem, the ones who likely loved him the most in that other timeline? Ning Yingying, of course, and then Sha Hualing and Liu Mingyan – even if only briefly, he did meet them!

And once he did… if Shen Qingqiu let himself believe that Luo Binghe truly loved him and he changed his mind after he had the chance to experience life away from him, how could he bear it?

…okay, that's kind of fair. He knows that he's not strong enough to survive losing Luo Binghe, after having him. He's already experiencing that a little already – adjusting to not having his husband anymore is already tearing him up inside, and he only had him for a single day.

What about Shen Yuan was even worth coming back for?

…I feel you, bro.

That thought left Shen Qingqiu cold. He did his best to shake himself out of it and get on with the rest of his fairly packed day, but his heart wasn’t in it. More than one disciple had tentatively approached him and inquired after his health, which left him feeling even worse for causing them concern.

awwwwwww… your kids love you and worry about you, SQQ!

It was his fault for taking advantage of Binghe’s willingness to indulge him. Should he stop allowing himself to get close to him at all, completely cut off all physical contact?

MAYDAY, MAYDAY, DO NOT ATTEMPT!!! THIS WOULD NOT END WELL!!!

Even the possibility left him feeling almost despondent and, for right or wrong, he discarded it as something he couldn’t deny himself, never mind the effect the decision would have on Binghe.

Oh thank goodness

So much for a strictly student-teacher relationship, huh.

You're. Uh. Finally realizing that, huh? Ahaha… I feel like you're going to try to forget that and its implications as soon as you can ignore it.

It was a relief to leave the Peak after midday, his mood not enough to ruin his appetite and waste Luo Binghe’s hard work in the kitchen

How many times can one person be attacked by feels in a single chapter??? How many times can I just awwwwwwww at them as my heart melts???

(even though the accompanying note about wishing him good health made him feel like scum).

>_<;

He was en-route to Jing Xue Peak which specialized in arrays and talismans when he got a message from Shang Qinghua. He looked around the clear, open sky, and thought it was safe enough to open it.

Broship time, cucumplane time!!!

- - -

SQH: hey bro you okay? SQQ: ?? yeah why?

Breakdown, what breakdown??? I'm totally alright!!!

SQH: well I’m a spy, right? I generally know what happens in the sect but my disciples started observing you closer after LBH came to get me like a week ago and we’ve been hanging out

SQH's disciples also care about their teacher! 😄

SQQ: your disciples are spying on the sect for you? SQH: not *spying* spying. Just like keeping me informed on things for logistic purposes SQQ: they’re spying SQH: …

XD  XD

SQH: Anyway! What’s going on? I’m here if you want to talk!

For the love of everyone's sanity, SQQ, please take him up on that offer!

Shen Qingqiu sighed and gave it real thought. While he didn’t quite feel comfortable divulging everything to Shang Qinghua despite their declared friendship, who else did he have to talk to about this besides Binghe? And what would happen if he kept relying on Binghe alone?

A) Yes, please talk to your friend about your troubles! B)…….you go the canon route and fall apart and eventually develop a highly unhealthy codependent relationship, so please go talk to SQH. I am begging you.

(What would happen when Binghe left?)

…Several very sad years, most likely.

SQQ: okay. Thanks, I guess

<3

SQQ: …It’s about Binghe. He kissed me last night. SQH: !! Congratulations…?

😂😂😂 I love how airplane is just like, !!!! Yay!!! Wait - he's freaking out, so I guess I should make that a question???

SQQ: No! No congratulations!! SQQ: He’s my student! My 16-year-old student!!! The only people he should be kissing are people his own age who are not his teacher!

"NO CONGRATULATIONS FOR ILLICITLY SMOOCHING MY STUDENT!!!" “Jail for this teacher!!! Jail for a thousand million years!!!!!

SQH: Yeah, but would either of you be happy if he did that?

*mic drop*

The sentence was like a punch to the gut. He was nearly at Jing Xue but he descended to nearby cliff to perch on solid ground, the open air around him suddenly feeling none too safe and dangerously thin.

oooof SQQ actually had to stop and pull over, that truth hurt so much.

Because no, he would not be happy if Luo Binghe started kissing other people at all.

 Nope. Not even a little bit.

SQQ: …no SQH: Okay then just let him know that wasn’t okay because of the age difference/teacher thing and you’re good, right?

That would require actually talking about our problems, and – boy howdy, is that hard. And you can only ever hope that the conversation goes that well and is that simple

SQH: When did he even have the chance to kiss you? I mean this is the best possible way, but you’re not the most approachable person.

😏 😏

 SQQ: …we spend evenings together. He cooks our dinner and seems happy to spend time with me until I go to sleep. He was brushing my hair for the night as I explained what I said to MQF. I thought he didn’t react well when I mentioned I had feelings for him but he kissed me as I was telling him that I didn’t expect anything from him. SQH: …

… … …wow. When he just – lays it all out like that – it's so-

SQH: there is so much to unpack there I don’t even know where to begin SQH: how much time to do you have?

-it's so that. yeah. That's a lot going on, there.

SQQ: not much, I’m heading to Jing Xue to start research before our meeting with MBJ tomorrow SQQ: we still good for that?

Mobei-jun!! This will be fun!!! I assume this research was related to Tianlang-jun's array, as guessed by LBH later this chapter! Most probably!!!

SQH: yes, my king will be there, don’t distract me though

😏

SQH: let me get this straight. You, the person who singlehandedly ended his hell of living with SJ as his master and continues to welcome him into your inner sanctum, told my protagonist with major abandonment issues that you’re in love with him but don’t expect him to feel the same? SQQ: …more or less? SQH: bro

Bro

SQH: bro you’re lucky the only thing he did was kiss you

XDDDDDDD

SQQ: No! No talk of Binghe doing… anything else! Binghe is baby, the cutest bun!

Cute, yes. Innocent??? Oh, you sweet summer child. *shakes head in sympathy at his delusions*

SQH: …if I’m recalling correctly you were fine with him doing a lot more than kissing at 17 SQQ: I was 16 at the time! Of course I was more okay with it!

oooof Young age range of Shen Yuan here, but still easily perceivable!

SQH: Wait wait whoa back the fuck up SQH: 16! What were you doing reading my web novel at 16?!

Even worse – he was actually buying your stallion novel at 16!

SQH: Wait, how old are you now??

Considering you spent 4 years writing PIDW… not that much older than 16

SQQ: Age checks on websites are a joke, Airplane. And I was there for the monsters and Binghe, not that mess that came later. SQQ: I died at 19, so I’m about 21 now. Hard to say with the shifting dates between death and rebirth.

I mean. it was probably pretty legit at first, when SQH still was working from his notes and not pandering yet – so it's actually your fault for being a good writer, SQH! …When would he celebrate his birthday? I feel like if LBH ever figured out how big a deal birthdays can be, he'd want to celebrate. Celebrate Shen Yuan coming into their world! New birthday is also your death day, in a way – if you celebrate the day you entered SQQs body. Depending on how close or far you were from your 20th birthday, you can either round up or round down ^^;;;

SQH: Jesus I’m talking to a baby

Qi Qingqi from several truth reveal fics agrees with you XD XD (Fic recommending – "Unveiling The Imposter" by ladylufffluff. They never catch Shen Yuan's name even as they're basically watching canon, so they she persists in calling him 'Baby' – much to some other's protests.)

SQQ: Hey! I’m an adult!! SQH: A Child. SQQ: NO

XD XD

SQH: oh God I’m having a crisis. Do you know how many times I almost told you “Luo Binghe won’t fuck you” in response to your more pointless criticism? I almost said that to a teenager?

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTT

SQH: oh the irony when you consider that statement NOW

😏😏😏

SQQ: all my criticism had basis SQH: yeah yeah but you were also a troll who was cruel because it was fun sometimes

:(

Guilt gathered in the pit of his stomach, confronted with the person who was no longer just a name on the other side of the screen but was actually kind of his friend.

SQQ: …you’re right and I’m sorry. I knew you worked hard to get that content out. I shouldn’t have been that mean to you just because I didn’t like it. You didn’t owe me that.

❤️ ❤️ ❤️ Shen Yuan realizing and being honest about when he did wrong!!! And then apologizing for it!!!

SQH: no no! I mean I appreciate the apology but really no need for it now. I could tell that it was based on frustration from how much you cared about the characters and world and it hurt more because I could actually see your points a lot of the time. But I had bills to pay and needed food, so I put that ahead of actual quality, which I won’t apologize for.

SQH is a good author when he's not selling himself out, and I stand by this statement – this sort of mature view and acceptance of the comment is a facet of that!

SQH: Besides, there were times when I could tell it wasn’t really about me, but more about you and whatever you were going through. With how dedicated you were to it, I kinda got the sense you didn’t have a lot else going on? SQQ: …yeah. I had always been sick and I probably directed what I was feeling about that at you sometimes SQH: and you were a teenager. Wow that puts so much into perspective.

<3333

SQQ: Can we come back to the present, here? You were going to unpack my situation or something?

Right – forgetting about the part where you're only a few years older than Binghe, and back to the part where your future husband cooks all your meals, brushes your hair, and puts you to sleep XD

SQH: oh yeah SQH: yeah that boy is gone on you don’t know how else to say it

asfhasjldkfhkjhklasdfhjsk YUP

SQH: look, to write him, I had to fundamentally understand him SQH: between what I saw of you and adult LBH and what you told me? SQH: LBH? Would probably worship the ground you walked on as long as you kept treating him well.

YUP and now that SQQ doesn't have to betray his fave- There's no possibility that he won't keep treating him well!!!

SQH: Anyway, unless you actively push him away, he’s going to adore you for life. He won’t even look at anyone else because you’re giving him all the love he craved since his mother died. SQH: He never needed 3000 beauties, or an empire or any of that really. He just needed love and when he couldn’t find it he tried to manipulate and force it into being. LBH here doesn’t have that issue.

❤️ 😭 ❤️ 😭 ❤️ 😭 ❤️

Oh. Oh. So… maybe he had a chance?

YES!!!!!!!

SQH: and with him being 16… yeah I stand by my statement you’re lucky that all he did was kiss you

He's not wrong XD

SQH: sorry, but why did him kissing you make you feel bad enough for it to show? I got a report that your Peak was near frantic with concern.

Disciples adore their Shizun so much <333

SQQ: it wasn’t the kiss so much as what it meant SQQ: I was SQQ: I was honestly nervous about letting myself rely on Binghe being there for me in the future, thinking he would meet one of his wives and move on

Completely irrational, but a very understandable fear

SQH: WHAT SQQ: so thanks this was actually helpful

Only by the powers of the two combined, can either Airplane-bro or Cucumber-bro experience the rare phenomenon known as "Common Sense"

SQH: No wait for real you thought he would what go into the Abyss and what? Forget about you?

yyyyyyyyyyyyyyeah no That's literally never happening

SQQ: … SQH: that’s real fucking dumb

What he said.

SQH: not in a mean way but, like, you tore me apart for writing LBH a tragedy because you cared about his happiness that much but you can’t see that you’ve set yourself up to create his happiness here SQH: you literally cultivated the power to make him happy and can’t see it

… ❤️ 😭 ❤️ 😭 ❤️ 😭 😭 😭 😭

-

SQQ: …yes but not about my disciples unless they’re in danger or something. They deserve their privacy.

👍 Pure, pure Cucumber-bro! He's inherently such a good guy who genuinely cares about his disciples <3

SQQ: and your spies need to be trained better if they didn’t inform you I spend my evenings with Binghe

How did they miss that??? Was the peak protective of that for him???

SQQ: minions? SQQ: like those creepy yellow things from America?

lolol

SQQ: you think of yourself like James Bond, Airplane? Really? SQH: no no, the quartermaster! Nerdy twink in the most recent ones, shipped with 007?

…Now I'm picturing MBJ as 007

SQQ: none of the words you’re saying make sense to me and I prefer it that way SQQ: I’m going to go work now

XD I love these dorks

SQH: okay okay good talk, see you tomorrow with LBH SQQ: …thanks again SQH: anytime bro!

<3333333333333333333333333333333333 I really, really love their friendship Let them be good friends!!!! Who can talk to each other!!! Give them a second person to rely on!!!! <33333

Shen Qingqiu continued on his way to Jing Xue Peak feeling a lot lighter than he had earlier in the day. Maybe things wouldn’t have to fall apart when Binghe went into the Abyss?

 I mean – yay, I’m glad you’re feeling better – but!!! Even though your relationship won’t fall apart – haha, not a snowball’s chance in hell – you most likely will. I mean. Not looking forward to being the other Peak Lords when you throw yourself headfirst into denial of how badly you’re hurting. Probably brushing it off with claims of, ‘this lord knew it was a possibility’ and ‘there’s no need for ill feelings, my disciple should survive’ if you admit to it at all… Throwing yourself headfirst into work… Sometimes imagining Luo Binghe’s scent as you struggle to fall asleep…   But, yeah! You’re status as first in LBH’s heart isn’t going to fluctuate even an iotat!!! So, that’s good!

-----

Luo Binghe was not having a great day.

 …Yeah, I just upset myself too, buddy.

On one hand, things were going well. Ming Fan had already told Ning Yingying about A-Yuan being bullied and she’d tracked him down to get the fuller story. With Ning Yingying sufficiently mobilized, it didn’t take long for the entire Peak to start feeling animosity towards most of the rest of the Sect. The feelings were only heightened by their Shizun’s reported low mood: he wasn’t angry, he just seemed sad was the rumor, which only made the ire of Qing Jing worse.

😈 😈 😈

[...]on the other hand, his A-Yuan was sad and he couldn’t help him.

: ( Too bad you don’t live together anymore, huh :(

By the time Luo Binghe was free, Shen Yuan had already left for his planned research session on Jing Xue Peak, working on figuring out how to free his birth father from his horrible prison.

 And then he keeps trying and just missing him!!!

 Even when feeling down, his A-Yuan managed to do things for him, even when he really should have taken time for himself since he wasn’t feeling well!

 Awww… but, Binghe, do you really think Shen Yuan would not throw himself headfirst into doing things in order to distract himself from whatever was upsetting him?

 Truly, Luo Binghe didn’t deserve him.

You two absolutely deserve each other!!! …in all ways, both good and bad ^_^;; -

And then of course Binghe does his best to make his evening easier, even making comfort foods! 😭 Binghe’s food really is one of their love languages – Binghe gets to provide, and Shen Yuan gets to appreciate and compliment! The sincere enjoyment both have for it!!!

 He smiled at him when he came into view and Luo Binghe’s chest filled with warmth. “Shizun, welcome home.”

Shen Yuan’s smile widened and Luo Binghe loved him so, so much.

Welcome home, Shizun!!! <333333

-

It was only after Shen Yuan seemed truly relaxed, about halfway through the osmanthus jelly that Luo Binghe had specially crafted for him, that he tried to get more clarity. “I’m sorry that your visit was difficult, but that occurred in the afternoon. Does A-Yuan not wish to share what ailed him this morning?”

 You can’t distract the protagonist, SQQ! He needs to take care of you!!!

 Shen Yuan froze and Luo Binghe couldn’t help continuing after a moment. “Did… did this Binghe do something to upset you?”

Shen Yuan seemed to stop breathing for a moment and a rock fell in Luo Binghe’s stomach. Oh.

Aww, Binghe, baby!!! It’s- it’s not really your fault! It’ll be okay!!!

 Panic began clawing at his throat. He was trying so hard! What had he done wrong to upset Shen Yuan so much that he couldn’t hide it? He was lucky that he was allowed to still cook for him, let alone sit and talk with him as they had been. How many chances would he have before he screwed up once too many and he lost the chance to be by his side? Would Shen Yuan give someone else a chance to take care of him better than Luo Binghe could?

 It'll be okay!!! Someone help this precious bun stop spiraling into a panic attack!!!!!!

“Binghe, Binghe, stop.” Gentle but firm hands settled on his shoulders and pulled him upright. Luo Binghe dared to look at him and was equal parts surprised and relieved to see concern there.

😭 😭 😭 Don’t be surprised by the concern!!! Of course your Shen Yuan cares about you!!!!

“In truth, I don’t know what to say about how I felt this morning without sounding silly, especially since I’ve had a chance to gain some perspective on it. Yes, it was in relation to something you did but no, it wasn’t your fault.”

Thank you so much, Shang Qinghua!!! …You deserve a raise for all the counseling you’re going to be doing for your new best friend XD …Make him pay you back by editing any future writing :3

“…Why was Binghe so upset just now?” Shen Yuan asked, worry furrowing his brow as he gently wiped away the tears that had escaped his eyes.

Awwwwww…….. 🥲 

Luo Binghe looked down again, embarrassed by his own lack of control now. “This one was also being silly and would rather not say.”

Awwwww, sweetheart……. <3333

“If. If I shared what I was upset over this morning, would Binghe perhaps be more comfortable saying? That way we could both be silly together.”

! Good boy! Smart boy! Communication is the way to go!!!

 Luo Binghe nodded and couldn’t help saying, “I doubt A-Yuan was as ridiculous as he says.”

…Binghe. I adore you, and I know you love him, but - you do know how ridiculous your Shizun is… right?

“Well, I was. Considering how Binghe kissed me last night and feeling bad for relying on him so much. Not because Binghe hasn’t proven himself reliable, but because I was afraid of relying too much on someone who’s going to leave.”

💔

 Luo Binghe stared at him. “A-Yuan, leaving you is not my choice. And I am coming back, after the Abyss. I would always come back for you.”

 I know 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭

 Shen Yuan’s cheeks were filling with red. “…I didn’t know that.”

…but apparently, this ridiculous man didn’t.

 Luo Binghe could do nothing but stare. Nothing safe, anyway. Climbing on top of the other man and kissing him was decidedly not safe.

…pffffft XD

 Luo Binghe blinked and decided that them not touching was no longer tolerable. He reached out to take one of Shen Yuan’s hands and reverently pressed a kiss to the back of his knuckles.

akasjf;l

 He felt a little better after hearing A-Yuan’s (ridiculous, mildly infuriating) insecurities

…Yeah, those aren’t disappearing quite so easily. Better get used to dealing with them ^^;;

“I fear many things, A-Yuan, not the least of which being banished from your side. I know you have… other options in choice of a spouse–“

aasdckkkkk don’t remind him!

 “Huh?”

…because he just plain won’t have a clue what you mean XD XD

“–and that you are interested in me at all has to be the result of lifetimes of good karma. I would hate to see you upset, let alone be the cause of it. Having your regard feels like the greatest gift in the world that I did nothing to earn, and one I fear losing.”

YOU DESERVE HAPPINESS, BINGHE

 “…You thought I would stop caring for you if you upset me?”

“…I’m not sure I was doing so much thinking as feeling at the moment because it sounds unlikely now that you’ve said it.“

I LOVE THESE IDIOTS IN LOVE BLESS THEM BOTH

I mean – these are legitimate feelings to worry over, but-

“More than unlikely, Binghe,” Shen Yuan said gently with a squeeze of his hand. Then, surprisingly, he laughed. “Oh, we’re both so, so stupid. We’re sitting here, worried about the exact same thing!”

  ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ <33333

“Yes! You know, I only have some idea who you might say are my ‘other options’ for a spouse, but I can name at least a couple hundred women who were part of your harem in another timeline?”

…What the fuck? Oh, Luo Binghe didn’t like that at all.

….Yeaaaaah...... You heard that right - a couple hundred.

 “And you know about them, because you read about them and that Luo Binghe…”

…doing the papapa!!!

 Shen Yuan hid his face while saying, “I skipped as much as I could, honestly!

Mmhmm.

But, um. Yes.

XDDDDD

 -

It’s hard for me to wrap my head around Binghe being satisfied with just one person, let alone that person being me.”

awwwwwwwwwwww – my other baby, let me promise you – he will be!!!!!!

 I don’t think Shen Jiu was capable of it, really. That man should not have been put in charge of teaching let alone the care of children.”

That. Is. Hm. A bit of an understatement.

 “My point is the first version of Binghe I was exposed to was far from perfect and I still cared deeply for him even in the abstract. While you are different, Binghe is Binghe. I have seen you at your worst–a worst that hopefully you never get pushed to in this timeline–and I still choose you.”

HE HAS SEEN ALL OF YOU AND HE STILL CHOOSES YOU HE HAS SEEN YOU AS A MURDEROUS, BLACKENED RULER, AS A PRECIOUS WHITE LOTUS, AS EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN, AND HE LOVES YOU THROUGH IT ALL!!! HE LOVES ALL OF YOU!!!!!!!!

 -

“…A-Yuan, I started loving you more than a week ago.”

“…Thank you?”

asfj;lkajsdf;lkasjf;alkjsdf;lajskd bless your precious little soul

 Luo Binghe sighed at the adorably awkward response. “I started loving you when I thought that you were Shen Jiu. I had seen past the pain I thought you had caused me because of your actions later and had forgiven you enough to love you. You were enough for me to love you at something worst than your worst. How can you still doubt me?”

 DAMN IT I’M CRYING AGAIN STOP DROWNING ME IN SWEETNESS (please continue drowning me) “You were enough for me to love you at something worst than your worst.” I CAN’T EVEN sakdjfa;sldfj 😭 😭 😭

Shen Yuan’s eyes were incredibly wide. “…Oh.”

OH

 Emboldened, Luo Binghe came closer and lightly touched Shen Yuan’s face.

I love their little touches so much ❤️ ❤️

 “That said, I would be honored to know you. I want to know about your world and how you grew up. I want you to feel okay being utterly yourself, even when it doesn’t fit the elegance you project in public. Even though you can’t see me as an adult yet, I do want you to see me as safe to be around. Seeing you as Shen Yuan for the past week has only left me wanting to know more and I am so, so grateful for the privilege. Won’t you let me know you, A-Yuan?”

😭 😭 😭 There’s just- too much in there- I can’t-

 I do want you to see me as safe to be around.

I can’t-

 Seeing you as Shen Yuan for the past week has only left me wanting to know more and I am so, so grateful for the privilege

It’s just-

Won’t you let me know you, A-Yuan?”

😭 😭 😭  ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

They were close, so close and Luo Binghe loved it, lived for it. Shen Yuan’s eyes were dark now and Luo Binghe worked to memorize the exact shade of them in this moment. Mine, he thought. Say you’re mine.

Mine Say you’re mine Be mine forever

 Shen Yuan’s hand came up to touch his and he leaned into Luo Binghe, their foreheads touching and breaths mingling. “Binghe should not kiss this Shen Yuan.”

That’s not a no

 “…Yes.”

HE SAID YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 “Yes to what?”

“Binghe will know me as much as he wants.”

“All of you, then.”

ALL OF EACH OTHER!!!

 Shen Yuan closed his eyes and pulled Luo Binghe into a hug. “I could never punish Binghe for being himself.”

asfdhaskdjhf Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuug as the bond forms and I try to hold back tears

 Turned out that Luo Binghe’s day was pretty damn great after all.

And so was my day after reading this!!!!!!!!!!!!!! …each and every time I read this!!!!!!

  💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖 💖

>> Chapter 4

[boxoftheskyking]

Something Good, Part Twenty. The End.

I don’t know how cultivation works and I’m not about to learn now. There’s some blood here.

I can’t believe it’s done. Thank you everyone who has been reading, and everyone who’s left beautiful comments here, on AO3, in tags, yelled out a window. I’ve never finished a piece this long or in this way, and I would not have gotten further than 2 chapters without yous guys

Let’s get to it.

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, Part Ten, Part Eleven, Part Twelve, Part Thirteen, Part Fourteen, Part Fifteen, Part Sixteen, Part Seventeen, Part Eighteen, Part Nineteen

--

On the last morning of peace, Lan Wangji wakes up in Wei Wuxian’s arms. He smiles before opening his eyes, small and instinctive, and Wei Wuxian can’t not kiss him for it.

“Did you sleep?” Lan Wangji’s voice is rough, soft as raw cotton.

“No.”

“Hmm.” He presses his face back into Wei Wuxian’s chest.

“What are you thinking?”

“It’s foolish,” he mutters against his collarbone.

“Tell me.”

“I am afraid.”

Wei Wuxian holds him tighter. “That’s not foolish.”

“I keep waiting for someone to come and fix everything. Wen Ruohan shouldn’t be allowed to do what he is doing. I want someone bigger than him to come put him in his place. I feel young and stupid and weak and I want someone else to be in charge.”

“Yeah.”

“It’s foolish.”

Wei Wuxian kisses his hair. “If we get all the sects together. Maybe all the sects and the citizens as well, we’ll be bigger than the Wens.”

Lan Wangji looks up at him. “What if we’re not?”

“I don’t know.” Wei Wuxian runs his thumb lightly under Lan Wangji’s eye, over his cheekbone, over his ear. “I don’t know, Lan Zhan.”

The Wens come as the children are changing into their play clothes after lunch. Wei Wuxian is waiting at the door when the older disciples come running to their room, eyes wide and confused. Lan Xichen follows.

“The Wens are here.”

“Fuck!”

“They’re commanding the disciples to leave today, now; they’ve got at least thirty armed men. We can’t fight and win.”

“Fuck, fuck, what do we do?”

Three Wen soldiers come up behind the running teenagers. “Hurry up! You should be packed already. Didn’t the Sect Leader tell you you’re going for indoctrination?”

Lan Wangji joins them, jaw so tight it looks like his bones are about to crack.

“Brother. What do we—”

“I can get the little ones out,” Wei Wuxian whispers, brain spinning faster and faster like a wheel heading down a hill. “I don’t know about the older kids.”

“We’ll have no choice; we have to send them.” Lan Xichen watches the flurry of activity with such profound regret that Wei Wuxian grabs his arm and turns him away from the soldiers. 

“They’ll be all right. They’ll be hostages, right? Technically you still have an alliance, so there’s no reason to harm them.”

“We can’t just—” Lan Wangji cuts off as a little hand tugs on Wei Wuxian’s shirt.

“Wei-qianbei, what’s happening?” Lan Feifei asks, big round eyes tracking everything.

“Shhh, here, come back inside. Lan Zhan, I’ll get them to the back hill, okay? Just meet us there, with food if you can.”

Lan Wangji grabs his wrist, a question on his face, but he shakes him off and goes back inside. With luck, the teenagers will take a bit of time getting organized, but knowing the Lans it won’t be much.

“Disciples!” he says in a stage whisper, waving them all over. “Come here, we’re going to play a game.”

“A game?” Lan Ting asks, doubtfully.

“Yes, yes, gather around everyone. Now we have some visitors, and they want us all to go on a trip. So everyone will grab your bag and pack up everything you can. Clothes, blankets, whatever you have. Wen Ning, Lan Bin, Yao Hualing, help the little ones.”

“How is that a game?” Hualing asks.

“I’m getting to that part. What I want you all to do while you pack is to pretend to be the most badly behaved children in the world. I want you to whine and cry and yell and stamp your feet. Make a mess. When I ask you to do something, I want you to say that all you want is to see your bunnies. Can you do that?”

“I still don’t see how this is a game.”

“It’s a trick. We’re playing a trick on the visitors.”

“But how is it—”

“Then when I say the word, you’ll be your wonderful obedient selves again. It will be so funny! They’ll be so surprised.”

“That’s funny?” Lan Bin says, wrinkling his nose.

“Yes, yes!” Wei Wuxian tries not to seem desperate. “They’re very strange men, very strange sense of humor. Trust me.”

“Isn’t that lying?” Su Meiling asks. “Lying is forbidden.”

“Not lying, no, it’s a joke, just a joke. Hanguang Jun says it’s fine, okay? Trust me. When I give the signal, start crying, okay?”

The children look around at each other, still not convinced, but Wen Ning says, “Okay, Wei-qianbei,” and that seems to be good enough for them.

“Okay, go!”

It’s silent for a long moment. Then Ouyang Zizhen gives a tentative, “No, I don’t want to?”

“Good, good, louder,” Wei Wuxian whispers.

“No!” Su Ming yells, stamping her feet. “I want my bunnies!”

“Yes, the bunnies!”

“I won’t go! No! No! No!”

“Beautiful, excellent! More!” Wei Wuxian lets the racket build, encouraging them, before messing up his hair and running to the door.

“Ah, Zewu Jun!” he says, loud enough for the soldier to notice. “These children are so willful! I can’t get them to pack their things.”

One of the soldiers comes over. “What’s the problem?”

“No, no, no, NO!” the kids yell from inside, and someone throws something against the wall.

Yes, perfect! He thinks.

“Oh, sir, I’m so sorry. These children, they won’t travel without their bunnies.”

“That’s ridiculous,” the man sniffs. “Just get them packed.”

“I mean, I’m trying, sir. You’re welcome to try.”

The soldier grunts impatiently and pushes past him to the door. He opens it to utter chaos—someone has flipped their mattress, half of the kids are lying on the floor and wailing, and Lan Jingyi has no clothes on. I guess this is what’s hiding behind three thousand rules. Behind the soldier’s back, Wei Wuxian gives an encouraging smile and conducts them louder and louder. The soldier turns and he schools his expression back to overwhelmed as he runs over to wrangle Jingyi into his pants.

“What is wrong with these children?” the soldier demands.

“It’s their bunnies, sir, they never travel without them. They’ve got cages and everything.”

“Well, go get the damn bunnies then.”

“You know, I would,” he says, shoving a shirt over Jingyi’s screaming head. “But I can’t tell them apart. These children, they’re very particular. You know some bunnies are more energetic than others, some have favorite foods, or special—”

“Shut up, fool, just take the children and get them. I won’t listen to whining all the way to Qishan.”

“Right away, sir!”

Wei Wuxian shuts the door in his face and waves the children over. “Good job everyone! We almost have them fooled. Bags all packed? Excellent. Now we’re going to go to the back hill, so just keep crying and yelling until we get there. Okay? Good work.”

He leads them out, wailing and sobbing, and the older disciples freeze, staring at them.

“Oh no!” Wei Wuxian yells over the racket. “Such willful children! Shame on you all! We’ll be right back, sir!”

They pass the infirmary, where Wen Qing is waiting in the doorway.

“What the fuck, Wei Ying?” she hisses at him.

“Ah, Lady Wen!” he yells. “The most gifted rabbit catcher in Gusu! Please come, help us!”

She glares at him, but then sees the soldiers behind him and her face goes carefully blank. She follows.

When they reach the back hill, he gestures them all quiet and close.

“Excellent work, everyone! A-Ning, I need you to keep an eye on the path, let me know if someone is coming.”

“That was fun, Wei-qianbei!” Jingyi shouts. “I want to misbehave all the time!”

“Yes, you’re a prodigy, but it’s time to be quiet now. We’re going to go on an adventure, okay?”

“With the soldiers?” Lan Yixian asks.

“No, we’re going somewhere else. Okay? But we need to be quiet and fast.”

“Wei Ying,” Wen Qing murmurs. “You’d better have a plan. There’s no way we can outrun them through the forest on foot.”

“I need your knife.” He holds out his hand. She looks doubtful, but gives it to him. He cuts a long strip from the bottom of his shirt, leaving his stomach bare.

“Wei-qianbei, your belly!” Zizhen yells, pointing at the scar.

“Shh, Zizhen, it’s okay.” He spreads the cloth on the ground and makes a deep cut in his finger, starting to write.

“It’s a talisman?” Sizhui asks, leaning over his shoulder.

“Yes, A-Yuan, but it’s very complicated, so please be quiet.”

“Wei Ying,” Wen Qing says, one hand on his back. “I can’t power this kind of—”

“It’s not for you, it’s for me.”

“You’re not strong enough.”

“I have Chenqing. It’ll help.”

“It’s too risky.”

“Wen Qing, unless you have a better plan right now, let me work. I need you to go through first, make sure they land okay. Will you do that?”

She’s quiet for a long time while he writes. “Don’t make me watch you die,” she finally whispers.

“If I do, you won’t be here to see it.”

He finishes, rises, and holds the talisman in his hands, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. He’s been shutting off the pull towards resentful energy for so long, it takes a moment to find it again, to open himself up to it. Chenqing isn’t a source of energy, but it’s a good conductor, so once he attunes himself to it the rush begins. It’s harder to feel the pit inside of him—he’s been too happy, too content, but if he pushes it’s there. He thinks about Wen Zhuliu, Wen Ruohan. He imagines Jiang Cheng’s face, Jiang Yanli’s, feels the pain of missing them. He sees the frightened eyes of the older disciples being marched away from home, Lan Xichen’s clenched fist, Lan Wangji’s rough voice saying I am afraid. He feels Wen Qing’s solid hand at his back. He opens his eyes and sees the children gathered around him, thinks Mine, mine, mine.

He flings the talisman out in front of him with a burst of flame, and it explodes into a swirling black portal a few feet off the ground.

“Go. Wen Qing. Go,” he grits out, already feeling his reserves of energy running thin.

Wen Qing takes a breath, nods once, then runs and leaps through the opening.

“Lady Wen!” Lan Bin cries. “Where did she go?”

“We’re all going,” Wei Wuxian says, fighting to get the words out and hold the opening. “Help the little ones.”

He has a vague idea of where the portal might lead, an open field in another part of Gusu, but he’s trusting Wen Qing to make a plan from there. He may have sent her off the side of a cliff or in the middle of a lake, but he has to believe it will work. It has to work.

Lan Bin looks doubtful. 

“Please,” is all Wei Wuxian can say. The portal shimmers for a moment, losing stability, and Wei Wuxian shuts his eyes to focus again. He feels his feet root into the soil and deeper, into the mountain, the stone, veins of power eons old, power that sees all of human life come and go like a single drop of rain against a roof tile. Resentment grown centuries before there was a word for it, before there was reason, a time before logic. 

It hurts. He’d forgotten how much it hurts. 

When he opens his eyes again, Lan Bin is passing Jingyi through the opening.

“Wei-qianbei, I’m scared,” Yao Hualing says.

“I know. Me too. Just.” He groans through another burst of energy. “Get them through.”

Something rips inside him, a sail ripped from the mast in the middle of a hurricane, and resentful energy floods him. He feels it in the spaces between his heart and lungs, the invisible gaps between each drop of blood, his pores yawning open like canyons. He can’t see, can’t hear over the whispering, roaring, wailing that’s tearing through him. Hold on, just hold on he repeats in his mind, and the darkness answers give, give, give. 

“Wei-qianbei!” Wen Ning cries, running from the road.

He forces himself to see, in flashes like a series of paintings. The last child’s foot disappearing through the portal. Wen Ning, appearing at his side. Lan Wangji coming down the path, followed by two soldiers. Sizhui, running for his father with arms outstretched. 

“A-Yuan!” Wei Wuxian screams, but it’s too late. A soldier grabs him around the middle and holds him, sword unsheathed and held to his wailing throat.

“No!” Lan Wangji shouts, but as he takes a step closer, the soldier tightens his hold.

“Baba!”

“What do I do, what do I do?” Wen Ning gasps, crying, hands clenching.

“Go. Through.” Wei Wuxian manages.

“I can’t, I have to—”

“A-Ning. Go. Now.”

With a last look over his shoulder, Wen Ning dives through the portal. Wei Wuxian plants his feet and shifts his focus, transferring the current of power into his left hand, holding the portal open. 

“Let him go,” he growls.

“Close the portal now, or I swear I will kill him.”

“Last chance.”

The soldier nicks Sizhui’s neck and his screaming cuts off with a tiny gasp that hits Wei Wuxian like a thunderclap. His vision goes red, dark at the edges, and his mind snaps.

MINE roars the darkness, and for once it’s in unison with the rest of him.

He lashes out his right hand and a cord of darkness, thin and strong as a whip, shoots out from his palm, curls around the soldier’s arm, and slices through. The man screams and tumbles backward, sword and arm together falling to the ground, blood spurting out and soaking Sizhui’s blue shirt to black. Sizhui shuts his eyes and freezes where he stands, little hands clenched at his sides.

The second soldier lunges forward, but Wei Wuxian flicks the whip back the other direction and catches him across the face, slicing open his cheek until half of his jaw and teeth are exposed.

“This is mine,” he says—it feels like nothing, just like breathing, but it echoes through the forest, shaking the trees and  frightening the rabbits to run around them like a river current, screaming like ghosts. “You dare touch what is mine.”

The soldier stumbles upright and holds his face, half raising his sword, and Wei Wuxian pulls the whip back into the air, hovering in front of him. The blood soaking into the ground rushes up through him, the soldier’s pain. Sizhui’s terror hurtles through him, making him stronger. He feels hot blood against his neck, in his hair, as clearly as if he were in the boy’s place.

“Give me a reason. I dare you. I beg you. Give me a reason.”

Before the soldier can move, the tip of Bichen bursts through the center of his chest. Lan Wangji shoves him off the blade to flop onto the ground. Wei Wuxian watches his life wink out like a lamp and drinks it in, spinning it into darkness. Lan Wangji doesn’t wait to sheathe the sword, just grabs Sizhui up with his free arm.

“Wei Ying,” he says urgently, which shakes Wei Wuxian back to the moment. The fear, the death, it all gives him a burst of energy, but he can feel the end of it coming near, like stitching a torn cloth back together with the last few inches of thread. Hold, just hold, please just be enough to hold. He pulls the whip back into himself, dissolving harmlessly into smoke, and throws his right hand back to the portal.

“Go.” It’s still not his voice. He tries to get his voice back. “Lan Zhan, please, hurry.”

“Wangji!” Lan Xichen runs down the path behind them, taking in everything, the portal, the bodies, the bloody sword. “Wei Ying, your face—”

“Go!” Sweat is rolling down his cheeks, or maybe tears, or blood, or maybe all three. Lan Wangji looks back at his brother for a long moment, then steps through the portal.

“Zewu Jun, hurry, jump through.”

“No, I— Wei Ying, I can’t, the soldiers. They’ll burn it all down, they’ll kill everyone.”

Wei Wuxian groans and the portal starts to shrink.

“We’ll find you. We’ll go—”

“Go to Yunmeng.” Lan Xichen grabs Wei Wuxian’s wrist and forces a current of clean energy through him. He’s nothing but a conduit, hollow, but it holds the portal in place, blue light weaving in between tendrils of black smoke. “The rebuild has begun. Jin soldiers are there for defense. Lanling is preparing for war, and they will protect you. Stay off the roads.”

“You’ll meet us there? The older children—”

“I’ll look after them. I’ll make some excuse for you—”

“Tell everyone I took them. Demon Wei Ying. Tell them I tricked you, all of you, I stole them away. I’m an unknown, I’m on no one’s side. Say I killed them. The worst things you can think of, tell them, they’ll believe you.”

Lan Xichen nods once, face going tight with pain. “We’ll clear your name, after—”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“I’ll hold the portal. You go.”

Wei Wuxian takes a halting step towards it, legs heavy as through iron chains were wrapped around them.

“Wait,” Lan Xichen says. “I”ll need— It needs to look like we fought. If I use my own sword—”

Wei Wuxian nods. “I’m sorry.” He lashes out—the whip is smaller this time, weaker, but it cuts up the side of Lan Xichen’s face and down across his shoulder, red blooming on his white robes. He winces, but his energy doesn’t falter. Shouts ring out through the forest, the sound of dozens of men crashing towards them through the trees.

“Take care of them,” Lan Xichen pleads.

“They’re mine.”

Wei Wuxian takes a step and throws himself at the portal, just as it begins to close. He hears Lan Xichen shout “Wei Wuxian!” behind him, then feels himself pulled in all directions, torn into pieces and slammed back together. His lungs are flattened, his stomach is missing, his eyes are backwards, his hands are multiplying like a flock of crows around him, choking—

And then, in an instant, it’s over. He hits the ground and lays flat on his back, gasping.

“Wei-qianbei!”

“Wei Ying!”

“Wei-qianbei!”

“Wei-qianbei!”

He’s surrounded by a flickering, moving mass that half blocks out the sunlight. He can’t see shapes, can’t see colors. Little hands on his face, his body, pulling at his clothes.

“I—” his mouth is dry, his tongue thick and heavy. “I—”

“Back, back, step back.” He knows this voice, these hands on his forehead. They feel his neck, his stomach.

“W— W— Wen—”

“Shh, shh, don’t talk.”

“ ‘vryone? Ev— ‘ryone?”

“Yes, yes, shh.”

“Where?”

“Other side of the mountain. Miles away.”

He relaxes into her hold. Time flickers, disappears, and reforms around him. He sits up, coughs, spits blood onto the ground.

The figures around him are still blurry, but he recognizes them. The children. Wen Qing and Wen Ning at his sides, propping him up. Lan Wangji is standing, staring at him, holding Sizhui. Wei Wuxian squints. Sizhui’s blue shirt is gone and he’s wrapped in red. Wen Qing’s outer robe, he realizes. His hair is soaked, drying stiff against his back, and there’s blood smeared across his cheek. His eyes are still closed and Wei Wuxian can see him shivering in Lan Wangji’s arms.

“A-Yuan,” he breathes, reaching out one hand.

“Wei-qianbei,” it’s little Lan Feifei. She reaches out and touches his cheek with one tentative finger. “Your eyes.”

“My eyes?”

“They’re not . . . right.”

“Oh.” He touches his face as well, as if he could feel the difference. “What do they look like?”

“They’re red. And your face, it’s so white. There’s black, here.” She traces uneven lines up his neck, across his temples, his cheeks.

“Is it scary, Feifei?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry, sweet one. You’re being very brave. You’re all so—” he’s suddenly finding it hard to talk, swallowing around the lump in his throat. “So brave.”

“We need to move,” Lan Wangji says, not unkindly. “It’s too open here.”

Wei Wuxian struggles upright, a dozen little hands reaching out to hold him. They look wary, staring at his face, but they aren’t scared to touch him. He loves them so much he’s about to dissolve in it. Mine rumbles through him, not violent this time, but low and satisfied like a purr.

“Wei Ying,” Lan Wangji says, and reaches out for his hand.

Sizhui suddenly turns his face and opens his eyes, staring over at Wei Wuxian. His face is blank, and Wei Wuxian wishes he had a scarf, a mask, something to hide his appearance.

“A-Yuan,” he starts, “I’m so—”

But then Sizhui reaches out and grabs his shirt, pulling hard enough to make him stumble. He crashes into father and son and wraps his arms around both while Sizhui hides his face in his neck.

“Oh,” Wei Wuxian breathes, sweeping a hand over his hair and kissing the side of his face over and over. “I’m so sorry. You’re okay. It’s all okay now.”

It isn’t. It’s not okay now. But for a brief moment, as Lan Wangji holds all of them upright, they can breathe.

“We have a lot of traveling to do,” Wen Qing says. “It’s going to be difficult, and we’re going to have to be very sneaky. Can we do that?”

“Yes, Lady Wen,” a few children chorus.

“Where are we going?” asks Ouyang Zizhen.

“It’s a surprise,” Wei Wuxian answers at the same time Lan Wangji says, “It’s a secret.”

“But where—”

“How would you like to see your Wei-qianbei’s family?” Wei Wuxian says, meeting Wen Qing’s eyes. She smiles slightly and nods. “Wouldn’t that be fun?”

“Your family?” Jingyi pipes up. “I want to go!”

“Good. Then we will. It’ll be a surprise for everyone.”

“What about my big brother?” Lan Hua asks.

“Yeah, and my cousin?” 

“My brother too!”

Wei Wuxian looks at Lan Wangji, unsure.

“They will join us later,” Lan Wangji announces, the voice that allows for no doubts and no arguments. “We have to go our own way for now, but we’ll see them again soon. For now, we need to stay together and take care of each other. We are a family, aren’t we?”

“Yes, Hanguang Jun.”

“Yes, Baba,” Sizhui whispers. Wei Wuxian kisses his cheek again.

“Let’s get moving,” Wen Qing says. “At least down to the tree line, then we can make a plan. We should be able to go a few miles before dark.”

“If we find a graveyard for the night, I can—” he stops himself, looking at the children. ”We can be safe in a graveyard.”

“Don’t overdo it,” Wen Qing warns.

“I never overdo it. Come on, everyone. Gather your things.”

He presses his forehead into Lan Wangji’s shoulder for a last moment, then lets him go and bends to pick up Jingyi. The weight is too much for him, and he ends up back on his knees in the dirt.

“I’ve got him.” Wen Ning comes up and hauls Jingyi up on his hip. “It’s okay, Wei-qianbei, let me help.”

Wen Qing gets him upright again and they move off through the grass towards the trees. 

They will walk for as long as the children can stand it tonight, and Wei Wuxian will call corpse puppets to watch over them through the night. He can see it all in front of him. It’s like reading a score and hearing the song come together in his mind. There will be rivers to cross, mountains to climb, caves and ditches to hide in night after night. They will be frightened and exhausted and starving. But they will arrive in Yunmeng, at Lotus Pier. He will row them all across the lake, and they will lean out of the boat to pluck lotus blossoms. Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli will meet them at the gate, and Wei Wuxian will fall into their arms. Jiang Cheng will protest, will yell, but he’ll catch him. And Yanli will take his ruined face in her cool hands and tell him that he’s home. 

He tightens his arm around Wen Qing’s shoulders and gets an answering squeeze around the waist. As if he can hear their thoughts, Lan Wangji turns back and catches his eye. Wei Wuxian looks at him, singing the song in his mind, showing him the way. Lan Wangji nods, and Wei Wuxian smiles.

The End.

[eldritch-elrics]

svsss: the (not so) grand return of peerless cucumber

so a LOT happened in the chapters i read last night (44-49) and i have. SO many thoughts

not as many as i had right after i read but i really had to go to bed so i couldn’t write them all up.....

i put some reactions in individual posts but i’ll repeat them here!

first of all. shang qinghua. fucked off to the demon realm. like, good for him? but also. i want to see my boy

binghe keeping sqq’s body??? xue yang vibes OFF the charts

so I’M IN LOVE WITH THE MUSHROOM PLOT

i love how every so often sv will hit me with a twist that is SO up my alley that i just. lose it a little bit

HE MADE HIMSELF A CLONE BODY OUT OF MAGICAL MUSHROOMS AND TRANSPORTED HIS SOUL INTO IT.

i love mushroom shit and i love bodyswapping and. my god.

the fact that sqq has died twice and been forced to inhabit 3 different bodies??? wei wuxian wishes he were this cool

sidenote but the mental image of sqq doing radio calisthenics in the forest is really funny. or maybe it’s just funny to me because of the associations i have with this one time in japanese class?

sqq’s new body looking like a cross between shen yuan and shen qingqiu is really interesting and perhaps... symbolic....?

also hey does this mean he doesn’t have to deal with the cureless poison anymore. i assumed that it would be cured in his eventual sexytimes with binghe but hmmm i guess not!

the point where i really lost it was when he realized he was disconnected from the system. i know now that it wasn’t permanent but that was just so interesting, how much he hates it and wants it gone. which makes sense! even though it has helped him get out of bad spots at times, it’s a sign that he’s not really from this world. now i’m just really curious what’s gonna happen to the system at the end of the novel. maybe it’ll shut off once he achieves the “goal” it’s seemed to have set for him and gets together with lbh?

also i’m glad that sqq seems to have matured a little bit in terms of his people skills / problem solving skills? though uh. remains to be seen how he’ll act in front of binghe when binghe realizes who he is

it also seems like i was completely wrong about sqq’s motivations for sacrificing himself lol. lot more selfish than i thought? but it makes sense! fun twist

mxtx sure likes to have her protagonists execute plots that they don’t tell the reader about until after they happen lol (i’m thinking of the golden core transfer)

uhh back to plot reactions

love the running joke about peerless cucumber. also the demon names... six balls <3

also hold on a minute, peerless cucumber is a dick joke? lmao

thank you airplane for making it clear binghe has a big dick. absolutely vital character information

so i’ve said this before but sqq’s narration really CARRIES this novel. here i’m thinking specifically about his diatribe against sha hualing’s nails

shl is pretty fun. sexy evil lady!

sqq can turn his fan into a blade. nie huaisang get ON that smh

yang yixuan my beloved!

also HAHA i predicted that sqq’s super mushroom powers could help the xin mo thing and i was RIGHT

so sqq is just. SO invested in getting the plot back on track. like with all the harem members and stuff. it’s so funny because like bro. surely you’ve noticed by now that things are going very differently than in pidw. and also... you don’t WANT to go back on the pidw track bc that would kill you!!!

so the system reactivates when binghe turns up right? i am thinking about. the fact that when it tries to reboot it’s like “contacting customer service”

WHO IS CUSTOMER SERVICE.

it’s so interesting because like... obviously the whole system thing is so much bigger than just A Book? it’s even got airplane trapped inside it. and he’s the fucking author! who is running this thing? and for what purpose?

sqq listening in on the gossip about how lbh is DEFINITELY obsessively in love with him was SO funny. poor man

so binghe. he has become so COLD

i don’t like it :(

once more. my dude go to therapy.

wait also random but sqq has a beard now and for some reason that’s so funny to me

life at the palace seems terrible lmao no one is doing ok

smh, mxtx protags keep dying and staying dead for huge amounts of time and then coming back in different bodies

the fact that binghe’s happiest memories are training with sqq :(

THE FACT THAT BINGHE IS ABSOLUTELY SHIT AT KISSING

my god. that entire scene

went from “awwww headpats” to “AAAAAAAA”

the fact that the system congratulates him i’m sjkdhgjhsdhgjsds poor sqq.... didn’t ask for this shit.......

after 50 chapters, he’s finally realized he turned the male lead gay <3 say goodbye to all those funny oblivious moments!

i had to stop there because it was way too late at night but wow. we shall see how this relationship progresses

i can’t see it improving anytime soon but at least sqq knows lbh likes him now???

i had a LOT of thoughts last night but now i’m pretty much just like. i really need to see where it goes before i make any judgements on bingqiu

rn i’m not a big fan because 1. sqq is so wildly uncomfortable (understandable lol, even if lbh thinks it’s just a dream) and 2. lbh is very obsessive and that’s not really my favorite trope. but like it’s obviously not meant to be a healthy relationship, at least definitely not right now, and i do like some good fucked up romance! i’m excited to see the developments where sqq realizes what his real feelings are

i’m also fairly neutral on binghe as a character atm. his main personality traits seem to be “obsessed with sqq” and “trying not to die from evil sword qi poisoning” and i don’t find that all that compelling? between him and lwj i have to say that mxtx’s love interest characters are not really my favorite, though i wouldn’t say i dislike either of them.

furthermore i’m slightly concerned with how lbh’s “i’m the main character and i get what i want” attitude is gonna affect the romance. i know there’s some dubconny stuff later which i can’t say i’m excited for but i am excited to see how binghe’s character is gonna develop in general

my aspirations for bingqiu is that they’re both able to eventually break free of the expectations of the system

because, look at this from sqq’s pov. there’s this ai in your head that has, for literal years, been steering you towards a romance that you (at least outwardly) don’t want. isn’t that fucking terrifying? i love it. the system (at least how i see it) has been bending the established plot of the world in order to make this happen. it’s like fate but you can see the gears turning.

and even if sqq does end up liking lbh back, can you imagine the existential crisis of like. wondering if he really CHOSE to get with binghe or if he was somehow compelled to by the system which acts based on binghe’s emotions?

i think that would be so interesting

however what i think is Actually going to happen (based on that one time when airplane was like “hey cucumber, uh, is lbh just a character to you or is there more...”) is that sqq is gonna realize that he’s had a bit of a crush on binghe since reading pidw and is only just now dealing with his internalized homophobia. so him getting together with binghe has less strings attached

i think there’s some opportunity here for a commentary on the soulmate trope? because svsss is just so steeped in themes about agency and fate. i think that would be really cool but we’ll have to see. i feel like the ending is gonna be simpler and happier than i want it to be but obviously i cannot make any judgements yet! i’m just having Thoughts :)

so, i also read one of the extras (the one where he goes with lqg to battle succubi) because the translation i’m reading recommended it! it was pretty fun

sqq SO clueless. like i get it, he doesn’t think he’s into anything other than Pretty Cis Women, but. sqq we’ll work on this

also ASKING LQG IF HE’S A VIRGIN. sqq literally stop

(that was so funny though)

liu qingge ACE RIGHTS

actually lqg’s outburst in this chapter was kind of bizarre and can be explained in a few different ways i think?

i really like the idea of him being aroace. thinks true love doesn’t exist etc

i feel like the intended implication of lqg’s outburst is that he’s realized madame meiyin is referring to binghe and is like “holy shit no sqq can’t be with Him”

maybe lqg is just homophobic?

but i. also kind of wonder if lqg is gay and in love with sqq? and is just putting up the “such deep love doesn’t exist” thing because he really doesn’t want sqq to know

there was that whole line where the succubus was like “well you’re not his soulmate you don’t know” and it made me think

on the other hand i can’t really see lqg liking sqq that way; they seem to have more of a Bro Bond

then again lqg does keep fighting binghe for sqq’s sake

either headcanon is fun! i’d be excited for more insight into lqg in general i think

[suibianxieyixie]

on feminism in mxtx novels

hi :)

aight i gotta preface this by saying i do enjoy mxtx’s novels. i genuinely think the stories are very heartwarming at times and heart wrenching at others. while i love svsss for its humour and subversion of tropes, i also think mdzs handles commentary on the grey nature of people and mob mentality quite expertly. i can appreciate some aspects of the romantic relationships (please note the keyword ‘some’; i’m disgusted by some aspects of it). even outside of the plot, her novels have reignited my love for chinese culture as someone who used to shun that part of themselves.

that being said, here’s my two cents on feminism in svsss and mdzs (sorry i haven’t read tgcf might write sth when i have :D). i mainly talk about female characters and their political and physical power compared to male characters, their impact on the story, and their character development.

svsss disclaimer:

>>> In SVSSS, the lack of female characters without agency or development is partially excusable due to the fact that the world is a satirical portrayal of stallion novels, which (usually) add female characters as additions that complement the main male character and are there to tell the main character’s story, not their own.

svsss cons:

>>> however, this does not excuse the fact that the female characters are not developed much beyond their roles in the stallion novel that is being critiqued. 

>>> LACK OF AGENCY: None of the female characters could hold their own against the male characters, and none of them have prominent character arcs. Quite a few of them still have the main goal of winning the protagonist’s love (Sha Hualing, the young palace mistress, Qin WanYue), just as in the stallion novel. None have their own aspirations.

>>> LACK OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT + POWER: While Ning Yingying and Liu Mingyan shed their roles as ‘harem members’, they don’t seem to have much change in their motivation or goals (especially when compared to the two main male characters). While both are cultivators of the Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, they’re presented as less powerful than the male cultivators (the former gets captured by a demon and is saved by two males, the latter loses a battle two other males won).

svsss pros:

>>> The one exception is Qi Qingqi, a peak leader who seems more than competent in a position of power and holds her own in a sect FULL of male leaders. From the few scenes we get of her, she seems really badass and independent. Although she’s not a particularly important to the plot and has little to no development, i appreciate the little representation we get of a woman who holds a position of power and authority. 

mdzs pros:

>>> In MDZS, I think this problem is actually fixed somewhat. Let’s look at Yu Ziyuan and Wen Qing.

>>> Yu Ziyuan is a woman in a position of authority (like Qi Qingqi), Although she does not develop much throughout the story given she dies quite early on, she plays an important role in moving the plot along during the first third of the story. She can also actually hold her ground in a fight against a male opponent, which is honestly more than I could ask given she’s already ticked off two of my criteria for good female representation.

>>> Wen Qing is also quite a character; even though she’s not a fighter, she’s got agency and moves the story along. She does develop as a person throughout the course of the novel. Initially she’s hesitant to help Wei Wuxian out of fear of being caught, but by the time she eventually exists the story, she’s willing to save him by being caught out of her gratitude for him. Giving credit where it’s due, both women play a much greater role in their stories than any of the characters did in SVSSS. unfortunately, while some problems are fixed, new ones seem to arise

mdzs cons:

>>> Maybe it’s just me but I’m a little uncomfortable with the fact that almost every single female character (bar MianMian) sacrificed themselves for men, and they died in horrific ways as a motivator for said men. Yu Ziyuan was killed brutally by the Wen Sect, while Wen Qing was burnt alive by the Jin Sect, Jiang YanLi was stabbed in the throat, and this is all done as a motivator for Wei Wuxian (Jiang Cheng as well). Of course, females die in the real world; sometimes they’re killed and sometimes people who loved them are deeply affected, this isn’t at all explicitly un-feminist. However, maybe it’s the sheer repetition of a woman’s brutal murder being used as a motivator for a man’s character development that subconsciously perpetuates the idea that even in death, females are just a stepping stone for male development.

overall, it could have been better, but it could have been worse. although i haven’t read tgcf, judging from the slight improvement from svsss to mdzs, i wouldn’t be too surprised if there were more feminist aspects in mxtx’s third work. if there’s anyone who’s read tgcf who wants to confirm my suspicions without spoiling it, or if there’s anyone who disagrees with my talking points, then feel free to!

thanks so much for reading! this is my first post critiquing/praising works online so apologizes for any errors :)

[hamliet]

Reflections of Su XiYan in Scum Villain’s Female Characters

I did not realize it was MXTX ladies week until yesterday. :( So I want to do a post/meta on the amazing women in each novel (not without critique), so let’s start with MXTX’s first one!

Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System, which while it may have more obvious narrative flaws than TGCF or MDZS (it sets up some plot points it kinda drops later, whereas TGCF and MDZS pretty much maximize every single aspect of potential), I actually think is just as rich, clever, and coherent thematically as MXTX’s latter two novels.

The plot points that are dropped, though, are actually almost entirely related to the set up the female characters as deconstructing the idea that they were just things for Original!Luo BingHe to collect. While it does do this to an extent with Su XiYan, Ning YingYing, and Sha HuaLing, it kinda… dropped the arcs halfway through for Ning YingYing and Sha HuaLing, and sets up but never really begins Liu MingYan’s and Qin WanYue’s. 

Su XiYan’s arc, though, despite it taking place in the past and being told to us, is entirely about refuting the role the men in her life ascribe to her... and all of the other female characters--all members of Original!Luo BingHe’s harem--represent a part of her. You could get, like, really Oedipal if you wanted to, but I’d rather not beyond simply saying it’s a pattern in stories that is definitely present here. Aspects of her story and character are reflected in each of the women who are love interests in Proud Immortal Demon Way. 

Our first refutation of how men treat and categorize Su XiYan is through her foiling with Ning YingYing. 

Shen Yuan notes that Shen Jiu sexually harassed Ning YingYing:

the original Shen Qingqiu had designs on Ning Yingying... [he] had dirty thoughts towards his lively and well-behaved disciples. Several times he tried to lay hands on them and almost succeeded at that.

Which is what the Old Palace Master did to Su XiYan:

He turned to focus his stare on Luo Binghe’s quietly sleeping face... nThe Old Palace Master gazed at him for a long while then sighed: “When you close your eyes, you resemble her the most. And also when you’re being cold.”

His eyes traveled over Luo Binghe’s face greedily. If he still had hands, he would have reached out to fondle as well.

However, the Old Palace Master never got anywhere with Su XiYan, because she fell in love with someone else and thereby refutes the idea that she’s his tool. In the original, Ning YingYing is rescued by Luo BingHe in the original. In the novel, Ning YingYing’s arc is about her discovering self-sufficiency. She doesn’t need rescuing from Luo BingHe; she can rescue herself, as is shown when she leads Ming Fan and the other disciples into a fight to protect Shen QingQiu’s honor after his arrest. When someone slaps her, she slaps back, twice--but Shen QingQiu gives her the energy. I would have liked (and think her arc was heading towards) her to grow to be competent on her own as well. 

Next, Sha HuaLing.  

Sha HuaLing represents TianLang-Jun’s assumptions about Su XiYan: that she was a deceptive seductress who would betray him for her own desires. However, in reality, like Sha HuaLing does in Proud Immortal Demon Way, Su XiYan betrays her race (for her, humanity, for Sha HuaLing, demons) for love. 

Sha Hualing was a pure-blooded demon, cruel and ruthless, cunning and artful, but fell irrevocably for Luo Binghe. After getting together with Luo Binghe, don’t even speak about killing for him; she even dared to do an outrageous thing like betraying the demons for him. 

Su XiYan, however, was never given the chance to fight back. In the actual novel, Sha HuaLing does much the same (betrays the demons), but Luo BingHe does not love her and she knows it. I think this is a good ending place for Sha HuaLing, assigned to fight against her father in the final battle (which she does), but we’re told rather than shown her development and we’re not told what led to this decision, which is a shame. 

Sha HuaLing is perhaps most directly foiled both in Proud Immortal Demon Way and in SVSSS by Qin WanYue. 

Qin WanYue, much like Su XiYan, is considered the perfect disciple of the Huan Hua Palace. Regarding Su XiYan, it’s noted: 

“That woman had shocking talent, was intelligent and sensitive when making decisions, and she had the aura of a tyrant. The Old Palace Master loved and cared for this private disciple. He thought of her as a pearl that should be protected in his hands and trained her to be the next Palace Master of Huan Hua Palace. No matter where he went, he would bring Su Xiyan along with him. The importance that he placed in her was abnormal.”

Qin WanYue’s symbol is a pearl that lights the way.

Luo Binghe picked up Qin Wanyue’s Night Pearl that had fallen to the ground and raised it high, as though it were a beacon. It awakened those who had frozen in place.

Not to mention in the original novel Qin WanYue loses a child in a miscarriage caused by someone else (Sha HuaLing) much like Su XiYan almost lost Luo BingHe when pregnant with him. Qin WanYue clings to Luo BingHe after the loss of her sister as something who might be able to offer her happiness. She’s not much different than Luo BingHe growing up parents and clinging to ShiZun: she who lost her sister and then clings to the person who saved her. But in her case, Luo BingHe does not return her affection, and I really had hoped/ expected her arc to end with her finding her own path.

Qin WanYue is also tasked with an action beneath her (much like Sha HuaLing): taking care of the Little Palace Mistress, the Old Palace Master’s literal daughter and hence another foil to Su XiYan. Her defining trait is her pettiness and cruelty, the latter of which Su XiYan is also said to have been capable of, as she began spending time with TianLang-Jun in an attempt to bring him down.

However, the mistress isn’t really set up with the potential for an arc like Qin WanYue is. 

From time to time [Qin WanYue] would cast a teary glance at Luo Binghe, as if expecting something...

[Sha HuaLing:] “how many times have you failed to seduce the lord yet still refuse to leave? If you don’t leave that’s fine, but you’re incapable of looking after even a single person. Her cultivation isn’t even as high as yours. You’re her senior martial sister. You didn’t stop her early and didn’t stop her late. All you did was to let her make this unreasonable scene in front of the lord. Who are you putting on this pitiful and wronged appearance for?”

Qin WanYue isn’t weak at all, but she puts on a weak act for Luo BingHe, hoping to attract a rescuer like she needed back then. I initially expected her arc to end with her accepting her strength and moving on form Luo BingHe (and from the little palace mistress). I still think it should have. 

And then we have Qiu HaiTang, whom I don’t think is set up as much for development as the others despite having more backstory on her. 

Still, Qiu HaiTang she was a woman mistreated and shamed by what had happened with her fiance Shen Jiu--just like Su XiYan was shamed for what happened with TianLang-Jun. 

“That’s right, if she hadn’t been so ill-fated as to fall for Tianlang-Jun’s wiles, she would have had such a bright and promising future and be a person of great renown today.”

“I don’t care what fantastic rewards are promised to me━having an affair with a demon and getting knocked up with a monster child is just plain disgusting. This kind of merit, I wouldn’t accept even if it was served to me on a silver platter.”

“Su Xiyan was probably too ashamed to remain, and thus ran away from the sect master.”

The thing is, all these roles--perfect disciple with great potential, brave enough to betray everything for love, endearing and caring, mistreated--none of these really capture the complexity and beauty of who Su XiYan really was... which is represented in Liu MingYan, the noted female counterpart to Luo BingHe, the main female lead. Liu MingYan conceals her face, which is too beautiful to be seen. 

Liu MingYan, like Si XiYan, remains mysterious; Shen QingQiu never sees her face uncovered, and the audience never really gets a clue as to what is going on in her head besides the mention that she cares deeply for her brother. Again, this is something I think could have and should have been developed more; she has the set-up for an arc with her conflict with Sha HuaLing being dazzled by her beauty and with her loyalty to her sect and brother, but it doesn’t go anywhere. She said to be “the number one female lead!” after all, and I think it’s entirely possible for her to maintain her aura of mystery and still... have an arc. Su XiYan did, after all, and she was dead before the novel began.

In the end, no one really can define whom Su XiYan was exactly, because she’s dead. What ultimately mattered, what defined Su XiYan’s legacy, was her final choice to save her son (and yes, it’s fair to critique that it’s again about a man, but it’s her choice). That’s why the story, in its penultimate chapter, has Shen QingQiu telling Luo BingHe: 

“Su Xiyan risked her life to give birth to you... 

“If I were in her shoes, I would not hesitate to drink [the poison for a fetus] regardless of how lethal it is. Then, after escaping from the water prison, I would absorb it all into my own body. Regardless of how agonizing and horrifying the process is, regardless of the price to be paid, regardless of whether it would be a painful death, I would never let this child suffer any harm.

“This is how I see it. You can take it as just an interpretation because there is no one who can tell you what Su Xiyan was thinking before she breathed her last. But if she really saw you as a disgrace, she didn’t need to do anything more. She could have just lowered you into the Luo River, on the coldest days of the year, in a harsh and frozen landscape━how could you possibly survive?... she also need not use the last of her strength and energy to put you in a wooden basin and push you away to safety…… You don’t even need to wait for someone to save you at all since you would have already become a wandering soul who met his freezing end in Luo River.

He’s healed, and he no longer needs to try to recreate his mother figure in over a thousand beautiful women like he did in the past. He can heal. 

Imo, it would have been even more powerful if the women then stepped out of these roles more completely, and became their own people. But I really do like all four of the main women I discussed here, and someday I’ll write more for them. 

[fweeble]

Mafia Romcom (1/?)

Title: None Fandom: SVSSS Pairing(s): LBHxSY, LQGxSY, LBHxLQG, YQYxSQQ Warnings: unrealistic mafia, badly written romcom, unbeta’d Summary: Cang Qiong’s Shen Yuan has been kidnapped. His brother, Shen Qingqiu is in a frenzy. Liu Qingge and Cang Qiong’s greatest enemy, Luo Binghe, are determined to rescue him.  A/N: Thank you @freykugel, my favorite cannibal oniisan, for being patient with me and even reading some of it despite knowing fuck all about SVSSS, xianxia, and everything else. You are the best hyung I could ever ask for. This is what happens when the world is batshit insane, I’m allowed to play Piofiore and read yakuza manga, and know fuck-all about the Chinese Triad.

Liu Qingge is welcomed into the building with the muffled sounds of Shen Qingqiu shouting. A harassed looking underling bows, offering strained apologies and offering to bring breakfast up to his office soon. It isn’t the first time that Shen Qingqiu has thrown a fit that has shaken the Cang Qiong mansion to its foundation and it likely won’t be the last. No matter how soundproof Yue Qingyuan tries to make every room in the mansion, Shen Qingqiu’s voice carries. For a moment, Liu Qingge entertains the idea of tendering his resignation. When he reaches his office, all that will be waiting for him are piles of paperwork and an endless revolving door of men making their reports for their day. No matter how loyal he is to Cang Qiong, he feels his grip on his sanity bleed out through his ears with every tick of the clock as he is stuck behind a desk. He has done enough that he should be able to retire, surely? Weathering the continued existence of Shen Qingqiu is far and beyond his job description. Trading in a desk for freelance work is a daydream that helps Liu Qingge pass the tedium of his current position more often than he’d like to admit. Enough of his men have looked terrified during their daily reports as he silently sharpened Cheng Luan for word to spread that Cang Qiong’s head enforcer likes to threaten his underperforming underlings with the sword. Liu Mingyan had burst into laughter when the rumor had finally reached her. It keeps his men on his toes, so he lets it be. (If he imagines throwing himself out the nearest window, Cheng Luan in hand, and making a break for freedom, far, far away from paperwork and the endless droning of reports, no one but Liu Mingyan needs to know this. Everyone is allowed to dream.) Yue Qingyuan, as ill-suited to the mafia life as any leader can be, would likely let him leave with minimal fuss and no demands for recompense. If anything, Liu Qingge suspects Yue Qingyuan may actually send him off with a farewell party. Everyone knows how often Liu Qingge’s the trigger of one of Shen Qingqiu’s infamous temper tantrums behind closed doors. As excellent as Liu Qingge is at his job, Yue Qingyuan would be relieved to have Shen Qingqiu’s Most Hated Enemy #2 out of the way. After all, even the boss’s husband would have a difficult time throwing out one of Cang Qiong’s inner circle without good reason. It may have been easy to get rid of Luo Binghe, who had no reputation, power, or influence to his name, but the Liu Clan has a long and illustrious history, influence, power, and more money than it knows what to do with. Getting on the clan’s bad side would cause Cang Qiong more headache than Shen Qingqiu in all his righteous fury can. Shen Qingqiu’s voice ratchets up another dozen decibels. Liu Qingge thinks he can make out a few of the words. He signs a few more documents, checks the clock, and considers taking a break before the first of his men reports. Tea with Shen Yuan in the garden sounds appealing. He straightens his hair, smooths any wrinkles out of his waistcoat and resists licking his lips nervously. Maybe he should drop by the bathroom before visiting Shen Yuan’s office, make sure he is presentable. Don’t be stupid, he tells himself, even as he feels himself flushing. Five years working with the man and he still has all the dignity of a three year old when it comes to Shen Yuan. Shen Qingqiu’s voice continues to get louder. He’s nearly at the door when it is thrown open by Shen Qingqiu who proceeds to brush him aside. Yue Qingyuan sweeps in after his husband, shooting Liu Qingge a pitying look as he politely shuts the door behind him. If only he hadn’t taken the half-second to fix his hair, he despairs. He could’ve been long gone before Shen Qingqiu decided to descend like a plague of locusts. “Find him!” Shen Qingiu roars as he paces back and forth in Liu Qingge’s office, hair in disarray and face surprisingly pale. “Who?” Liu Qingge grunts as he reluctantly returns to his seat. “Shen Yuan!” Shen Qingiu slams his hand down on Liu Qingge’s desk, sending papers flying. The monitor shakes ominously, threatening to fall. Liu Qingge eyes the splintered surface and feels his own rage building. Until the name sinks in. He can feel the blood drain from his face as well. He turns to Yue Qingyuan who looks uncharacteristically strained. “Explain,” he demands. ---- In between the shouting and Cheng Luan being threateningly brandished against an inconsolable and raging Shen Qingqiu, Liu Qingge has understood three things: 1. Shen Yuan has gone missing. He is not answering his phone. The app Shen Qingqiu had secretly installed on his phone isn’t working. He cannot be located. 2. Shen Yuan was last seen the night before, wishing his brother good night before retreating to his quarters. 3. Shen Qingqiu is convinced Luo Binghe has him. Liu Qingge hates agreeing with Shen Qingqiu about anything. They once got into an argument over the weather because he couldn’t bring himself to agree with the other man. But Liu Qingge can’t help but agree that if Shen Yuan has gone missing, the prime suspect is his ex-disciple Luo Binghe. It’s no secret how much Luo Binghe desires his old teacher. Which is why Liu Qingge wastes no time in delegating his duties to Yang Yixuan and marching over to Huan Hua’s estate and demanding a meeting with Luo Binghe. He had told Yue Qingyuan not to worry, had explained that it would just be an exploratory meeting. It had been clear Yue Qingyuan hadn’t believed him, but Liu Qingge doesn’t feel too guilty about breaking into Huan Hua and raiding the estate. If Luo Binghe has Shen Yuan, he’d keep him close. Shen Yuan will definitely be on the premises. If Shen Yuan isn’t there, then that’s one suspect off the list. It isn’t his job to play detective, anyways. If either Yue Qingyuan or Shen Qingqiu had expected subterfuge or delicacy in handling the situation, they shouldn’t have turned to him, the head of Cang Qiong’s hitmen. They could have turned to Qing Qi and her hand picked spies or even sent some of Shen Yuan’s own grifters to put out feelers and gather information. One does not take out a hammer when precision work is necessary. If anyone is at fault, it’s Shen Qingqiu’s fault for demanding Liu Qingge to find his brother. (Liu Qingge ignores the Liu Mingyan in his head that giggles at his flimsy excuses. He’s absolutely not as emotionally compromised as Shen Qingqiu is. He’s making perfectly sound decisions. What else had they expected a trained assassin to do? He can’t smile and make small talk, tricking a target into exposing sensitive information like Shen Yuan does. What he can do is kill a man in seventeen different ways with his bare hands while blindfolded and shoot moving target with pinpoint accuracy at over six hundred meters. His only skills are beating people for information and killing people for information. He’s just playing to his strengths.) He tosses one terrified looking Huan Hua thug out a window and points Cheng Luan at another before taking a deep breath and hollering. “LUO BINGHE. COME OUT!” He waits one second, then two. After the third, he angrily incapacitates the terrified flunky hiding behind a potted plant and takes the stairs up. Wading through the endless waves of Huan Hua trash that come crawling out like cockroaches, Liu Qingge does his best to avoid permanently injuring or killing any of them. There’s no reason to start a war if Shen Yuan isn’t here. (But he is; he definitely is.) After half an hour of crushing every person who even tries to stop him, Liu Qingge makes it to a heavy set of doors. Luo Binghe’s office. “Luo Binghe!” The man in question sits behind his gleaming rosewood desk, Sha Hualing perched on the end of it, twirling her hair. Luo Binghe smiles thinly at Liu Qingge. “To what do I owe this pleasure?” he asks lightly. “I never expected the great War God of Cang Qiong to visit Huan Hua.” Liu Qingge twitches. “Return Shen Yuan,” he commands, Cheng Luan still pointed at Luo Binghe. Luo Binghe’s smile gets sharper, “If Shizun has had enough of Cang Qiong and wishes to be with his dearest disciple, I see why I should send him back.” “No reason?” Liu Qingge resists stabbing the smug bastard immediately. “Is death not enough motivation?” “Death?” Luo Binghe laughs lowly, “I’m not the one courting it.” Sha Hualing rolls her eyes, rising from the desk with smooth grace. “I’ll go check on our...products,” she says as she leaves, shooting Luo Binghe a look that speaks thousands of words, all of them which make Liu Qingge turn crimson. “Shameless!” He bites out, head turning from Sha Hualing’s retreating back to Luo Binghe, before swiveling right back. “Shameless!” He repeats, face hotter than it should be. Luo Binghe retrieves Xin Mo from its place of honor on the wall even as he taunts Liu Qingge, “Cheng Luan, really? Is Cang Qiong so old fashioned that even its War God brings outdated weaponry to battle?” “As if the peashooters your men had were of any use,” Liu Qingge snorts. No gun, no matter how powerful it is, is dead weight in the hands of the incompetent. “You know as well as I do how useful good steel can be,” he continues as Luo Binghe draws Xin Mo. There’s a heartbeat as they both size each other up. Liu Qingge readjusts his stance, eyes Luo Binghe’s shifting his grip on Xin Mo. They’re about to strike, when the doors slam open. “BOSS! Shen Yuan has been kidnapped!” Liu Qingge’s murderous rage shifts. “SHANG QINGHUA!” Shang Qinghua stands in the doorway to Luo Binghe’s office, eyes wide. He trembles. “L-L-Liu Qingge?” He stammers. “BOSS?” Liu Qingge repeats, pointing Cheng Luan at the suddenly stiff Luo Binghe. “LUO BINGHE?” If it were possible, Shang Qinghua would probably melt through the floor. “Kidnapped?” Luo Binghe repeats, voice dangerously low. Shang Qinghua shivers more. He looks on the verge of tears. “Explain. Now.”