#guangheng

[planetkiimchi]

a love letter to your ex | x.dj

featuring: xiao dejun x gn!reader (but y/n tries to wear a skirt so), huang guangheng (hendery) ft. huang renjun, johnny suh

warnings: mentions of food, glass shards, mentions of blood, xiaojun is an idiot, so so much angst. i didn’t realise i was this evil? but anyway hope it’s good angst <3

word count: 5.6k

summary — dealing with a breakup is hard. but you thought that it would be because you hated the other person, not because you still loved them! no one told you that. xiao dejun, in particular, seems especially determined to make things harder for you, and maybe, just maybe, you want to go running back to him.

dedication: @loves-theory hey nada! i hope you enjoy this one, and it doesn't let you down after the sneak peek you got. it's kinda crazy how this one came out less fluffy than i thought it would, but i hope it's okay.

GETTING OVER PEOPLE IS HARD. You would know. Yes, you and Xiaojun had broken up on good terms, knowing full well that you couldn’t put up with his late-night gaming and his habit of just kissing you instead of making up properly. In turn, he found you too organised (and particular) for him to deal with and hated your club-going habits.

So yes. You realised you just couldn’t live with each other. But that didn’t mean you didn’t love him anymore, and you definitely still liked him.

You see, it’s very difficult to undo months of loving habits and strange peculiarities. Every time you tied your hair, you were reminded of his fingers running through your hair and getting tangled in it, while you laughed it off because you loved him. Even if you were just a little bit annoyed.

You signed your texts with an “xx y/n” because that’s how Xiaojun did it. He always started his texts with “dearest y/n”, and signed off with “your favourite man”. Which was true, at least until you broke up.

With all this in mind, it was very difficult to be “just friends” with Xiao Dejun, despite your wholehearted promises that you would try your best to do so. Because all he had to do was run his hands through his hair, and you found yourself falling into the rabbit hole of no return.

Again.

These were the thoughts running through your mind as you half-heartedly listened to your friends, Shin Hyewon and Kim Aeri, discuss their own love troubles. Only theirs were much more amusing to listen to, because Aeri’s boyfriend, Renjun, was a literal angel. Her love troubles went something like, “He bought me my favourite perfume for Valentine’s Day, but I can’t get him anything for White Day because I’m broke and I feel so bad. Do you think he thinks I’m a gold digger because I never get him anything?”

(You don’t think Renjun would ever think that of her. Renjun is the most understanding person you’ve met, and he doesn’t look down on anyone. Out of all the trashy men in the universe, Renjun is definitely the most likely to be empathetic to Aeri’s financial debt, even if he didn’t and could never relate. That was just the kind of man that he was.)

You didn’t have to say that aloud, because Hyewon was ready to be the voice of reason. In the least patronising tone possible, she managed to convey your thoughts exactly without any snarky remarks that reminded Aeri how lucky she was to have a boyfriend like Renjun. Which was three entire snarky remarks less than you could have managed.

Hyewon’s troubles, on the other hand, often went unsaid. Hyewon hated to make things about her, even when she was obviously in need of support. You and Aeri had realised that if Hyewon needed help, you would have to provide it subtly, so as not to hurt her pride.

Hyewon was a strong, independent woman (who sometimes needed her man). But Johnny was a busy person, and sometimes he got caught up in his work, prioritising “his boys” over his girlfriend. Hyewon was no stranger to being stood up by Johnny, and there had been many a time that you and Aeri had had to show up in a fancy restaurant to order one meal to share to save your wallets. There were never any questions asked, but it went without saying that Hyewon’s relationship wasn’t the best.

The real reason she stuck with him was that Johnny had been the perfect picture of a significant other for three years, and after five years of dating, Hyewon just didn’t want to give that up. For a while, you even thought that Johnny might be intending to propose.

You supposed, that with all the similarities in yours and Hyewon’s relationship, you should have guessed that it would end up similarly. Not wanting a loveless, unmaintainable relationship, you had broken up with Xiaojun on good terms. It was a mutual breakup. It was supposed to be a stepping stone in the journey of your life. It was not supposed to be something to haunt you for the rest of your holiday.

Perhaps deciding to work at an amusement park was not a good idea, you fretted. You, Aeri and Hyewon had decided to do it ever since you were in highschool, to get a taste of having a job that was fun and exciting before you lost the chance to. At the time of decision-making, it had seemed like the perfect way to get a discount to theme-park tickets for a date with Xiaojun.

Now, it felt like a painful reminder of how many of your classmates, friends, and Xiaojun’s friends frequented amusement parks during the school holidays. Friends who were almost 100% sure to pity you for your breakup. (Friends who didn’t understand the concept of a breakup without cheating or shouting or crying or arguments involved.)

“Riri? Is it okay if I wear this to work?” You twirled around in the mirror, calling out through the open door.

“It doesn’t matter anyway, they’ll give us standard jackets to put on and—” Aeri’s voice, which had been growing louder as she came closer, stopped abruptly. “Y/n, I know your fashion taste leans towards the cutesy side, but I don’t think they’ll allow you to wear a plaid skirt to work. In winter. In the outdoor amusement park.”

You smile sheepishly. Aeri never criticised your fashion taste before, mostly because you took after her for the most part. However, that meant that you didn’t have a perspective on what to wear to different occasions, because your wardrobe consisted of the same style of clothes in different colours and patterns.

Hyewon grinned as she came in, taking your outfit in. “Is this how you plan to make Xiaojun jealous? Because it’s definitely going to work.”

You scowled at her. Was there no way to put the unprofessionalism of your clothing choice nicely? Hyewon was dressed practically in a black suit with a blazer, and she looked like she would blend in easily in an office situation. Clearly, you needed to borrow from her repertoire of comfortable yet presentable clothes.

Hyewon tossed you a matching set of black trousers and a white blouse, pulling Aeri out and closing the door as they left you to get changed.

“Oh and by the way, you have ten minutes to eat breakfast, or we’ll be late.” Way to make an exit, Shin.

IT WAS BITTERLY, FREEZING COLD. You had left your chapstick at home, and you were sorely regretting it. Despite the morning rush, your chapstick was an essential item and you never should have left home without it. You wrap the standard coat, laced in an ugly orange colour to differentiate the staff from the park visitors, tighter around your body as you try not to visibly hop from foot to foot. That’s a surefire way to get fired before even working for a day there.

Luckily, you were not working at the entrance, scanning people’s tickets as they passed through the barrier. That would mean having to look at your classmates individually and watch the flash of recognition pass over their face and the excitement in their eyes turn into pity. Why was it always pity?

Instead, you were out in the cold, limbs freezing to death. “Move along,” you called out, clicking the metal clicker once for each person passing through. One, two, three, four…

“Y/n?” Oh crap who is it please don’t be Yangyang or Haechan or one of the nosy ones…

Oh. It’s even worse, you realised as your heart sank. It was Hendery, the school prince. Probably prettier than yourself and master of making everyone’s heart swoon with his jet-black hair, which fell over his face and the back of his neck in waves. He was accompanied by no other than his best friend, Xiao Dejun.

You couldn’t help but feel the sting of, not jealousy, per se, but something close to betrayal and closer still to missing and longing. You used to be Xiaojun’s best friend, his confidante, his other half. Yet, it had taken no longer than the span of a week for you to lose your title and fall to the ranks of a, if not real then at least a forced, stranger.

You avoided his eyes and tried to remain in working mode. Because if he just bit his lip or turned his head to show off his perfect, sharp jawline, you probably wouldn’t be able to focus. In fact, you might just collapse right where you were, and your job would go right down the drain.

You chose instead to focus on Hendery, holding out one hand to stop them from progressing further in the queue. “Please wait here, sir.”

“Your lips are really dry. Would you like to borrow my chapstick?” You looked down at Hendery’s hands as he offered you his chapstick. Actually, you would, you decided. Your lips were cracked and you still had the rest of the day to endure. It wasn’t going to get any better, so you would take any help that was thrown your way.

You applied it quickly and gratefully before returning it to Hendery and waving the next batch of park visitors into the ride. Obviously, you realised the health concerns, but you weren’t crossing any boundaries socially. Over your time spent as Xiaojun’s significant other, you had grown close to Hendery, enough so that you could borrow items of his without feeling awkward or strange. As you waved them through, you didn’t miss the expression of jealousy that flashed over Xiaojun’s face, feeling a small sense of triumph at getting him to feel the way that you had.

LATE EVENING, SNOW FELL in dribs and drabs. It was still only the beginning of winter, so there was no heavy snow and no flurry of white, chilly wind. However, it was dark outside and freezing, and your blood felt frozen. You could swear your bones were stiff from the cold.

Still, it was a lovely evening, and the coat was comfortable enough. There was only one last batch of people going on the ride before the theme park closed, and just as you let them in with a smile, Xiaojun passed by.

You hadn’t been able to pay attention to him earlier, but his cheeks were red from the low temperature, and his eyes were as starry as the night sky. His smile was exactly the same as you remembered, gentle and encouraging.

“Are you leaving yet?” He asked.

“No.” Of course, as a staff member you would have to close up the ride before you could leave. It wouldn’t take long, but you didn’t want to be left alone with Xiaojun for any longer than a few seconds. More than that, and you couldn’t—and didn’t want to be—responsible for what would happen.

Hendery came up to the both of you, panting slightly. He had clearly been running, which gave rise to the question, had Xiaojun ran to find you? Why was he still at the park so late?

As the questions ran through your mind, Xiaojun said, “I’ll wait for you outside the entrance,” leaving before you could protest. Even if he had, what would you have said to him? You knew that once his mind was set, he wouldn’t change it no matter how hard you tried to persuade him.

You were saved by your coworker calling your name, and you went inside the heated area (oh, blissful warmth) and tried not to stress too much about it.

The sound of Hendery asking Xiaojun, “What are you doing, man? They clearly don’t want to talk to you.” didn’t go unheard by you, but by then they were too far away for you to be sure, and you had trouble discerning Xiaojun’s response.

The ambiguity of the sentence hung in your mind, fogging your senses. You mindlessly swept the snow off the seats and wiped them down, your body going through the motions, mimicking your coworker’s without a second thought.

However, as you picked up the lost and found items, your mind was on Hendery’s words. He was right, Xiaojun was (weirdly) a sore subject for you, and you didn’t really want to talk to him more than you had to. It went without saying that what Xiaojun was doing probably went further than what most friends did, and hovered in the grey area between platonic and romantic. Obviously, you still loved Xiaojun. You understood that he cared for you, but if he didn’t stop that you were going to fall for him all over again.

True to his word, Xiaojun was waiting outside the theme park for you, with Hendery idling beside him. Hendery’s arms were crossed over his chest, tapping his foot impatiently when you arrived. He shrugged his shoulders, as if to say, I tried to stop him. What more can I do?

But Xiaojun was too focused on you to realise the silent conversation you two were having. He looked like he was having trouble restraining himself from rushing over to envelope you in a hug. He jiggled his knee nervously as you went over hesitantly.

Aeri and Hyewon waited beside you, huddled together in the cold, but you were too curious to be bothered by such a superficial thing.

“What do you want?” Hyewon asked for you, seeing how slow you were to speak.

“P-please hurry so w-we can go home,” Aeri chimed in, teeth chattering.

“Just wanted to make sure you were okay,” Xiaojun mumbled. Noticing how red your ears were, he removed his scarf and wrapped it around you, almost as familiar as when he’d done it before you had broken up.

“I’ll meet you at the café down the street when school starts again?”

“I- Alright,” you sighed. Stupid feelings and the way you always fell for him.

“STUDY HANGOUT’,” AERI SAID mockingly, making bunny ears as she did so. “Yeah, right. It’s obviously a café date.”

“Ugh!” You threw your hands up in the air in defeat, collapsing in a heap on the bed. Xiaojun had taken you to that café so many times before for dates, and now that you two were “just friends”, he thought it would be okay to reuse the same idea? That wasn’t going to work!

Your friends weren’t oblivious, they knew Xiaojun still liked you, but you really thought you had made it clear that now that you were broken up, you would have to draw a line somewhere.

“I need to bring a friend,” you decided. “Someone who can make the boundaries clear and prevent us from doing stupid things— Not you, Hyewon. That’s too obvious. Maybe… Ten?”

Hyewon shook her head. “He’s too transparent, and he’ll either be absorbed in something else or completely forget that he’s the chaperone and not a wingman.”

“Kun?”

Aeri quickly shot off a text, and the ‘ding’ sound chimed almost immediately after. “He’s busy.”

“That leaves… No.” You stopped in your tracks. You couldn’t! That would be too awkward for all three of you. Plus, you inviting Xiaojun’s friend over? Wouldn’t that be against protocol?

Hyewon grinned. “Yes.”

“No!” You leapt up from the bed, trying to leave the room, but Hyewon blocked the way.

“Think about it. It’s perfect: Xiaojun would feel too awkward with his best friend around to hit on you, you and Hendery know each other well, and Hendery definitely agrees that Xiaojun shouldn’t go back to you. He’ll definitely cooperate the best among all of them. Unless you think Yangyang could do a better job?”

“There’s always Winwin,” you offered meekly.

Hyewon scoffed. “Please! As if he could look up from his games. Or if Kun successfully gets him to change this year, then he won’t be able to leave the library. They’ll be studying together.”

You sighed defeatedly. There was no use in arguing, once Hyewon had won the argument, she would definitely not budge. Aeri didn’t want to go against her, either, so you were forced to ask Hendery to chaperone you.

“Okay,” you announce. “He said yes.”

Hyewon nods approvingly.

YOU WERE THE SECOND TO REACH, and when you made a move to sit down, Hendery waved you over. You sat down opposite him, watching his concerned eyes but not giving any kind of answer.

The silence settled like sediments at the bottom of a flask of unstirred tea, uncomfortable and distinct from the smooth conversations you were used to, but nothing that would be harmful to your relationship.

Seconds passed, stretching like minutes. You tried your best not to fidget, avoiding Hendery’s eyes before his concern could overwhelm you. The anxiety and sweaty hands were enough to deal with.

“So what’s going on with you and Xiaojun?”

Speaking of the devil… Before you could reply, Xiaojun saved you from the awkward situation. He came up to you two, confused but not surprised at seeing his best friend and ex at the same table. His hands were behind his back, clearly hiding something.

“Am I interrupting?” You shook your head, and Hendery moved over for Xiaojun to sit.

With a shy smile, Xiaojun presented you with a small bouquet of flowers. The bouquet was a deep shade of red, with red chrysanthemums, carnations, and camellias, with blue salvias hidden in the center. You didn’t know how to tell him what the flowers really meant, having been interested in the language of flower bouquets for a time before.

“From a friend,” Xiaojun said quickly. “Just- just a friendly bouquet. For our friendship.”

How many times did he need to say it to convince himself? Because you knew better than anyone that Xiaojun did not give thoughtless gifts.

Red chrysanthemums, I love you. Red carnations, my heart aches. Red camellia, you’re a flame in my heart. Blue salvia, think of me.

Xiaojun knew what he was doing. You could see him asking the florist what best to give, trying to describe his message in terms that fit the flowers. You could see him watching attentively as the florist arranged the flowers delicately, carefully carrying it from the florist’s to the café.

And it was your anniversary. White day. You should be giving him flowers, if you were together. That was traditional, and you adored tradition. You always wrote a note or a card when you gave him gifts.

“Happy White Day!” You grinned, holding out the chocolate controller. You had specially ordered it for your one year anniversary, and were so proud of it.

“Happy White Day,” he replied softly, gazing at the controller with loving eyes. Perhaps, that was the same gaze he used to look at you. You tilted your head as if to say, Well? as you eagerly awaited his response.

“It’s beautiful.”

“It’s beautiful,” you told him. Then, right as he sighed in relief, “But not from a friend to a friend.”

Your words were whispered, but perhaps still too harsh. You took care to keep your voice low and not attract attention, but it didn’t ease the pain.

“Really, Jun? I love you, my heart aches, you’re a flame in my heart? Think of me? You can’t expect me to believe you randomly picked a bouquet. I know you too well for that. I don’t know what you mean by it, maybe you didn’t want me to know outright, but I do. And we can’t keep doing this anymore. I really can’t live like this, Dejun. You can’t keep chasing after me and expect me to be okay.”

“Why would you have to?” He asked, getting heated. Hendery put a hand on him, ready to calm him down—wrestle him back into sitting if needed—but he immediately lowered his volume.

“Because. We broke up, Dejun.” You stood up as you said this. You made to leave, and Xiaojun stopped you with a hand that was clearly clutching something. You pushed him away, maybe a bit too hard, because whatever was in his hand clattered to the ground. You noticed that the clear shards resemble glass, a choked gasp of shock stuck in your throat.

You stumbled back, too stunned to notice that you accidentally stepped on what’s left of his gift. You were so busy trying to get away that you didn’t see what happened next.

XIAOJUN FELL TO THE GROUND on his knees. tears streaming from his eyes. Quiet sobs wracked his body as his chest heaved, practically breaking down. He picked up as much of the glass as he could, the crystal shards glinting cruelly back at him. He sobbed as he tried (and failed) to put his broken heart back together, except it felt like it was falling apart exactly the way the shards of his gift did in his hands.

Hendery had seen enough.

“Get up,” he told Xiaojun. He handed him a stack of napkins, which Xiaojun used to wrap the shards in, stuffing it into his pocket. “Don’t touch anything, I don’t want you getting splinters and needing to go to the accident and emergency unit.”

Xiaojun's hands slid into his pockets, and Hendery immediately pulled them out. "You have glass on your hands. Don't be an idiot, you're already doing enough to hurt yourself."

Hand still on Xiaojun's wrist, he dragged him back to the bus stop, mumbling under his breath, "I just don't get why."

Xiaojun’s mind went blank as Hendery brought him over to his house, picking the splinters from his palms with a tweezer, muttering under his breath. Hendery’s parents weren’t home, or they would have asked Xiaojun to sit down for a cup of tea and fussed over his injuries like he hadn’t fractured his leg playing football before.

Luckily, Xiaojun was mostly fine. The blood was minimal, and there weren’t any deep gashes or cuts. The glass in his pocket dug against his hip bone, but the discomfort was at least familiar, and better than the emptiness he would feel for weeks without you.

Hendery slammed bandages and antiseptic on the counter, watching Xiaojun to make sure he cleaned up his wounds properly. Xiaojun tugged the bandages tightly around his palm, mouth pressed tightly together unhappily.

“You can’t keep doing this to yourself, you complete fool. You have to let them go. Don’t talk to them until you can do it without crying. I know, breakups hurt, but you agreed. Both of you are mature enough to get through this, you hear me?” Hendery reverted to Cantonese to say this to Xiaojun, sighing exasperatedly.

Xiaojun didn’t know if he could promise that. He didn’t know if he could live with a gaping hole in his heart, with the lack of interaction and “love you”s, cuddling under sheets with you.

He missed you so, so much, every bit of you. From the tilt of your head to the tips of your hair that curled when the air got too humid, the baby hair that fell in your face. He loved to watch you shake your head in annoyance, the hair curling around your ear in familiarity. The glint of your eyes when you were up to something, the way they sparkled when you held back tears, how they disappeared when you smiled.

He missed pressing kisses into the curve of your dimple-less smile, brushing over your cheeks and reminding you how stunning you were even when you were insecure of your skin. Loved the way your neck fit just right against him when you hugged him, the crook of your neck perfect for falling asleep in.

He missed your hands. Missed how icy cold they were in air-conditioned rooms, the gentle warmth coming off of them after gym class. Missed holding hands with you, fingers interlaced in a comfortable, unchanging pattern.

He wanted you back, wanted to carry you back into his life and welcome you to the home as if you’d never left. He wanted to have a conversation with you and not have it end in awkward silence, wanted to go back in time and change everything and what did he do wrong?

Could he have done something to make you cry when he gave you flowers, made you despise him to the point where you consciously avoided him? He couldn’t remember, but sometimes you bottled up your feelings and exploded at the seemingly smallest things. It took time to unpack your feelings and talk about it, after you’d avoided confrontation for so long.

He wanted you back, and he knew that to do that he had to apologise first.

EXCEPT THAT HE DIDN’T REALLY know how to. Not when Hyewon glared at him as soon as he got within two meters of you. Aeri’s glare was even scarier, it killed his courage immediately.

He had always seen Aeri as demure, pretty but innocent, and completely harmless. He hadn’t seen her defend somebody with her eyes, baring her teeth without opening her mouth in the slightest.

Her face fell so quickly when she saw him, scaring him away immediately. He couldn’t get near you, and as days went by, he started to question if it really was worth it.

He probably would have left you to simmer in your feelings if he hadn’t decided to play sad songs at home and cry in his room, which led to him flipping through old cards that he had received from you, leading to the (not-so-)brilliant idea to send you a love letter.

From a secret admirer, obviously, because if he put his own name, you would probably throw the entire envelope away before you read a word.

He sat by his desk for a good hour and a half, writing with a pencil and furiously erasing it when it sounded even the least bit like himself. Soon, his table was filled with eraser dust and the paper was marked with indents, and he finally settled on,

dearest y/n,

i think i like you. i’ve watched you for a while, and i want you to know you’re the most attractive person i’ve ever seen. meet me at the library, the middle row if you’d like to give me a chance? please?

- your secret admirer xx

The last line was a bit risky, since he knew you would recognise the way he signed off his texts, but it was still just ambiguous enough that any cheesy person could have written it.

He wasn’t good at changing his handwriting, but his hands were so sore from gripping the pencil tightly that he could rest assured you wouldn’t recognise it at all. The library’s inconspicuous, right? She’ll never suspect it’s me. I hope we’re far enough that Winwin and Kun don’t turn around to see us.

It haunted him throughout the night, the envelope sitting atop his table like a doll, watching him sleep and entering his dreams.

“A LOVE LETTER?”

You looked at it in surprise. It was plain, with the only indication of it being from a secret admirer the heart-shaped sticker used to seal it loosely. The cream paper felt thin, and was nothing extravagant. You were glad, at least it wasn’t blaringly obvious to anyone who passed by.

Hearing your words, Aeri was by your side in a flash. Renjun came over, eyes examining the envelope without a word.

“You got a love letter?” He asked. You frowned. Yes, you were surprised too, but why did he have to say it like he was shocked? Couldn’t you get love letters? After all, you were single now.

“I’m just saying,” Renjun said with a good-natured shrug. “I’ve seen Aeri get plenty of love letters even though we’re dating, but you’ve never gotten one before.”

“Well, times change.” You pried open the letter curiously, and scanned the contents quickly, trying not to raise your eyebrows too much.

Aeri snatched it from your hands, confused when you didn’t put up any resistance, frowning like you. Renjun peeked over her shoulder, nosily reading it as well.

“Wonder who it’s from,” Hyewon said suddenly. Your heart leapt in your chest, but you nodded and jerked your chin, asking her to read it as well to give her opinion.

“The handwriting looks familiar,” you muse, “but I can’t really put my finger on who it belongs to. Anyway, I’ll probably go, but just to reject them politely. I’m still… I think I’m still caught up in how Xiaojun makes me feel. I’m not really ready to move on yet, so I’ll probably think of some way to say that nicely.”

You have to give Renjun credit for not grimacing at what you’re saying, because usually if you talk too much about deep things, men tend to grow bored or cringe in embarrassment. Like you said, Renjun’s perfect and you hope Aeri treasures him.

You banish all thoughts of the letter to the back of your mind, that’s a problem for future you.

YOU’RE REHEARSING YOUR REJECTION SPEECH as you trudge towards the library, not dragging your feet but not particularly eager, either. 

It’ll go something like: Sorry, I’m not interested. I understand that I’m available now that Xiaojun and I have broken up, but I don’t want you to be a rebound. (If it’s a sweet person that you know, you might tell them that they don’t deserve that.) I’m not ready for a relationship, and I won’t be able to commit to one in the near future. Please, leave me alone.

You’re also contemplating if it isn’t someone nice, and whether you’ll have to run if they get violent or if it’ll be fine since you’re in the library. What would the librarian be able to do, anyway?

The library seat (in the middle row) that the mysterious person had specified for the meeting point was empty, but you sat down anyway. You anxiously tapped your fingers against the table, drumming impatiently as you waited for said person to arrive.

You gave your surroundings a quick look, spotting Kun, Xiaojun’s friend, who smiled at you and waved. Sitting opposite him, clearly struggling, was Winwin, who looked up and tipped his chin in acknowledgement before biting his lip and going back to his work.

You were just about to get up and search for the person elsewhere, when somebody walked up to you, and Xiaojun took a seat opposite you.

your secret admirer, xx. dearest y/n. It struck you like a punch to your gut. It was an innocuous enough way to start a love letter and to end one, but it also screamed Xiaojun, after all that time he’d sent his texts to you, you couldn’t believe you hadn’t seen his fingerprints plastered all over it. Quite literally so, because he had probably handwritten it. That was why the handwriting looked so familiar!

You got up, ready to bolt, but his hand grabbed your wrist before you could go anywhere. “Please.”

It was soft, filled with so much desperation and pleading that your past self would not have been able to endure. You would have caved immediately, listening to every word of his and hanging on to his apology. You could never turn him down anyway.

But you’d had enough. You were sick and tired of walking this tightrope, dancing between your tears and his. It always felt like with Xiaojun, you were going head over heels, tumbling, unconsciously turning over and over again. Now, the slope was getting steeper, and you were falling so quickly both you and Xiaojun were going to get hurt.

“I’m not your toy, Xiao Dejun. I’ve had enough with you. Please, leave me alone. I don’t want to do this,” you whisper hoarsely.

“Before you go- at least tell me something. Just- just this one question.”

He hesitated for just a second, but you caught it. “Was I a bad person to you? I hope I wasn’t. But I guess I was.”

“I didn’t want to- I didn’t think I was good enough of a person. I felt like I didn't do enough to deserve you and I don't want you to end up the way hyewon did, with a person she loved but couldn’t treat her right.”

The old Xiaojun probably would have left the moment tears threatened to drop from your eyes in a public place, in the school library nonetheless, where many people knew him and you were supposed to maintain silence.

As flustered as he was, he still refused to leave you like that, fumbling through his pockets for something to help. Fortunately, he found a packet of tissue in his pocket and he offered it to you, relieved.

“Xiaojun, can you not do that?” You sniffled, pressing the tissue to your eyes and your leaky nose.

“Do what?” The gall! The audacity to sit there and look handsome and clueless and pretend like he didn’t know he was driving you mad. That was the reason that you couldn’t stand just being friends with him! Didn’t he get-

“That,” you said, gesturing to him vaguely. “The thing you do with your hair. And biting your lip. And turning your head so I’m forced to see that perfect, sharp jawline. And really just being in my presence.”

“Lovely to know I’m ruining your day,” he replied. He dropped his hand to his side and fished in his pocket for something, pulling out a clip and pinning his hair back so his fringe stopped flopping in his face.

You grinned half-heartedly at his response, happy with the dynamic you knew best.

“So, about that letter…”

“Don’t push your luck. We’ll… We could try,” you say. Before he can rejoice, you add, “No promises.”

“Trying’s good enough for me.”

[gnosiskrp]

𓂃 ⠀ ⟡ ⠀these muses have been : reserved !

kim minjeong / winter ( mandarin ) yoo jimin / karina ( guava ) cha eunwoo ( apricot ) park sunghoon ( mango ) lee seoyeon ( tangerine ) hwang yeji ( strawberry ) lee chaeryeong ( cherry ) jang wonyoung ( kiwi ) han julie ( nectarine ) shim hyewon / belle ( strawberries ) huh yunjin ( lemon ) huang guangheng / hendery ( strawberry ) liu yangyang ( papaya ) xiao dejun / xiaojun ( cherry ) phạm ngọc hân / hanni ( strawberry ) kim mingyu ( apple ) byeon wooseok ( raspberry ) lee yongbok / felix ( coconut ) eric sohn ( strawberry ) lee juyeon ( cherry ) choi beomgyu ( cherries ) choi soobin ( grapes ) choi yeonjun ( pineapple ) hirai momo ( pineapple )

please make sure to send in your application within the next 48 hours. we can't wait to meet you ⟡

[cosmiclatte28]

Spring Break (Hendery x you)

a/n : surprise! I am here with a Hendery oneshot, to all my Hendery lover friends here, please enjoy this light scenario!

featuring Jeno! and you as librarian

tagging @neopalette

here we go!!

It's another tiring day in your town's library. With Spring break happening, students happen to flood the room with laughter and chattering while they pick a book to read before school starts again.  Not that you dislike seeing the library full, you're even okay with letting them talk a little bit louder since no one is studying there, but you're super tired with the extra work to do.

First students happen to either return their books from last term or rush around the catalog computer to find a textbook they can rent for the next school year. It's funny when you see how those students who just come once or twice a year to rent textbooks, appear at the same time.

You are a book lover, you don’t really stick your nose to the pages but you love taking care of books and making sure their covers are still nice and their pages intact. You love rearranging books and guessing the plot from the title. But when it comes to cleaning up when you're closing ….that is a problem.

“I swear, why are there so many  books piling up today.” You sigh as you once again classify the books in a trolley with your colleague, Jeno, before returning them to the racks.

Jeno shrugs his shoulder “Because Haechan yesterday did not return the books into the shelf but just leave them here.”

You grunt “Ah Haechan! He really should learn how tiring it is for the next team to take two loads of work.”

“I guess some emergency happened, he's not the type to leave his job unfinished.” Jeno tries to cover up Haechan.

You roll your eyes “Whatever, now bring me those piles.” You point to the last pile of books and it's the fiction books.

“This is the most fiction pile I've received back this week,” you comment while arranging the title in the ordered alphabet sequence.

Jeno raises his brow “What's with this book? This is in hot demand.” Jeno shows you a cover you’re also seeing for the last week.

“Oh yeah! That book is always asked by students some even borrows it and by the time its back, someone else took it home.” You ponder. The title is not ringing any bell to you, you flip the pages but choose not to read this first and let the others finish it.

“I am not a bookworm too.” Jeno laughs when he realized he had been asking the wrong person.

Anyways you finish returning the books into their shelves with Jeno and arrive home four hours after your closing hours. Why?

Oh the bus that usually takes you home, happens to be not running today out of the blue. You are super tired from returning the books, you're hungry but your wallet was left at home and you need to walk to the metro to take a detour instead.

After the long way home where the seats are full, you arrive to your small shared apartment. Woah what a day, you thought.

With big hopes you open the door to expect seeing a cooked meal and your maybe your boyfriend

“Ah not my lucky day.” You yelp when you step into the room to see the total opposite.

“Don’t walk! Louis just misbehaves and peed.” He motions you to stay frozen on the door and you did.

Your eyes follow your boyfriend who's running to take dry towel to clean the mess you almost stepped unto.

“Woah, Louis what's wrong?” you pat the cat once you jump over the mess and close the door.

The cat just purrs at you and leans to your scratches more. You giggle feeling a bit better from the cute cat.

“Long day?” your boyfriend asks after he returns from tossing the towel away and washed his hands.

You nod as you drag your  chair and sit on the dining table “Got any food, Hendery?” you look around the kitchen.

No there's no food in the dining table, only jams and butter but no goodies.

Hendery scratches his head “I thought you ate already since you're coming home super late.” He glances to the watch. It's almost nine.

You drap your fingers on the table “Do we have ramen?”

He quickly stands up to check the cabinet and luckily you have some.

“Sit down, i'll make you hot ramen.” Hendery begins to fill the pot with water and boils it.

“Thank you,” you kiss his cheek when you walk to take drink out of the refrigerator. He kisses you back “Sorry I should’ve cooked you something, or bought you dinner on my way home”

You crack open a fresh cold can of beer and gulp it down “Don’t worry, I'm not gonna die.” You lean your back to the counter next to him and loosen up your uniform shirt.

“How's your day?” you question him in return.

He smiles “It was fun, I especially like the yoga class.”

You sigh “Lucky you, you know what you like and you can join workshops.”

Hendery turns the stove off and drains the water away “You can do that too. Maybe look for a sewing class? You look like you make a good tailor.”

You roll your eyes “Wow just one session and you're a funny comedian now!”

He scoffs and just shrugs his shoulder “Whatever, now here sit and eat before I finish everything.” He smiles as he puts down the pot and takes out the dining set for you

You smile “Thanks love,” you pick up your chopstick and begin digging in. J is playing with Louis across you, trying to keep the cat away.

“How is the library?” your man asks you when he sees you almost done eating.

You wipe your mouth “Quiet a day. There's so many books to return every night. There's this one person who always borrow books under one name but the person borrowing and returning it was never the same.”

Hendery looks puzzled and you mirror his face “I know I sound crazy, but that happens!”

He quizically looks at you “Maybe a coincidence?”

You shake your head “I don’t know, and this person reads like hella fast. A thick book can be finished within a day or two!”

“What is the name?” he sounds interested and you close your eyes trying to remember the name.

“Something chinese-ey… hmm wait let me think, I never remember this but I know when I see it.” You frown.

“And gosh the people borrowing the books are all good looking!” your brain remembers this instead of the name.

Hendery looks at you with a smirk “Oh hotter and more handsome than me?”

You quickly shake your head “No, I mean well they have their own charms.. one is super tall like a model, one has a pretty smile, one looks fun, one seems so mature and oh gosh the other has a pretty voice! I heard his humming.”

Hendery nods “That's 5” he shows up his palm and you raise a brow

“What’s wrong with that?” you gulp your drink.

Louis jumps from his lap “I mean try to look everyday like until Sunday? Maybe you'll see the real owner of the name?”

He sounds odd but nothing is ever normal with Hendery. So you play along with him

--

You meet the sixth guy on Saturday and you boldly ask if he is the owner of the name, to which the man with cute cat eyes sadly says no.

“Jeno, I am so confused with this mysterious person. They always borrow books but never show up. Why?” you ask on the night where both of you have to take overtime to return the books again.

Jeno laughs “Maybe they're busy?”

You scoff “Who is busy on a spring break?”

Jeno chuckles “We are.”

You sigh, he's not wrong…

“How can you find yourself a partner if you're cracking lame jokes.” You look at him with pity

Jeno pokes your stomach “Your boyfriend is also cracking lame jokes, yet he got you.”

You laugh, he's once again not wrong.

--

“Welcome, how's your Sunday?” You ask to the man with a sunglasses and a mask in front of you.

He feigned a “good"  which you miss since you're busy taking the card for the data.

“Name?” you ask, eyes still on your computer and book

“Huang Guanheng,” he answers shortly

You raise your brow and look up to see if this is another man. You frown when he looks down on his feet. Maybe he's shy, you thought

“Card please?” you reach out your hand that has a small heart tattoo on the wrist.

“Oh right!” he reaches for his pocket and when he hands his card to you, a sliver of his wrist comes to show and you gasp

“Babe?!” you stare in surprise

Hendery scratches his neck and pulls down his sunglasses “Yes?”

You swipe the card and quickly note the name “The hell? Are you also in this game?!” you sound a little bit furious.

Hendery bends to reach your height and gets closer to your face

“Correction, I am not playing a game.”

You scoff “Then what?”

He returns his sunglasses and leans back “I am Huang Guanheng.” He takes the book away from you and with a wink he flies away to the door. Each step he takes looks like he's in a runway.

All eyes are on him, well how can one not stare at a man with a black sunglasses, black turtleneck, red scarf  and long anime legs walking through the door

You still freeze in your spot and Jeno brings you back to life with a tap on your head.

“Ouch!”

“That was the seventh mystery? Who's next?” Jeno leans on the counter next to you and you tap his shoulder repeatedly

“That was Hendery!”

Jeno looks at you confusedly “Hendery? Oh as in your boyfriend? Oh he's in the mysterious game too?”

You groan “No. He is Huang Guanheng!”

Jeno bursts into a laugh “I don’t know who's silly here, you for not knowing your boyfie's name or you getting fooled by him. Either one, I have a great laugh today! Tell him he will be a great comedian! I can smell that already!”

Jeno laughs away to tell the other librarian and you still stare at the computer data and card with disbelief.

Huang Guanheng is Hendery, your own man. The same man you've been dating for three years. And today he surprised you with his real name.

  end

[xxdreaminadream]

a prince :(

[eggdery]

The Boyfriend, The Girlfriend, and Guangheng

“Guangheng!” you yelled, running towards him. It was in the middle of winter at nighttime and the cold was getting to you. Dejun’s jacket was baggy and bounced everytime you landed on the ground. You were happy, though. Knowing that Dejun had just confessed to you was a dream come true.Though it took some soju, he finally revealed his feelings to you. 

Your friends Yangyang and Guangheng planned a late night dinner for the rest of your friend group. You all had gotten busy with life and haven’t had much time to meet since then. So, meeting up was long overdue. To be honest, Guangheng never really planned the get together for all of his friends. 

You and Dejun had gotten close to each other recently after finding out you both work in the same building. So, catching the subway to work, having lunch together, and taking the subway back home became like clock work. You spent almost every day together. Though, it wasn’t apparent to Guangheng. 

Guangheng had always had a crush on you throughout university. Though, he never had the chance to get close to you like Dejun had recently gotten. Becoming close friends with you was a scary endeavor for him back then. You were pretty and smart. You were intimidating. But life is a bitch sometimes. All the times he saw you in university or in the store, he had always been so cowardly to approach you. He was never able to hold a conversation with you without the boys. It was so frustrating. 

Retrospectively, he regretted not making you his. Even  a couple years after graduating and dating around a bit, you never left his mind. So as a last minute rescue mission, he texted Yangyang to get the old gang back together. He wanted to see you after all these years. He was a new man, grown and mature. He thought you would notice him. Maybe even be interested in him after some years. But reality struck him as he saw you and Dejun talking. 

When everyone arrived, he took notice of how you and Dejun sat closely next to each other and how you would playfully slap him after making a joke. Your shoulders rubbing against each other after laughing hard or Dejun’s hand on your knee. It was noticeable how you guys weren’t just friends. You were more whether you both acknowledged it or not. 

After a couple of hours of catching up, you all had to leave. You and Dejun said you would cover the bill. So as the rest of the boys left, you stayed behind, making sure all the food was paid for and everyone had brought their belongings with them. Though you were a bit dizzy from the alcohol, Dejun was a huge help to you. And as you were packing your purse, making sure your credit card and ID were in your wallet, Dejun had blurted his feelings out. You were caught off guard. Placing your purse on the table, you slurred a confession back. In your drunken states, you had thought this moment was private. But when Guangheng came back to make sure he didn’t leave anything important behind, he saw you and Dejun kissing at your table. 

And yet again, Guangheng was put into perspective. He wasn’t going to get you through hopeful wishing. He should have told you his feelings to begin with. His heart sank at the sight. He walked back down the street, not caring if he actually lost something. His heart was broken and there was nothing he could do to fix it. Didn’t care if anyone stole his credit card or phone, there was nothing more painful than heartbreak. 

His voice started to whimper and a few tears left his eyes. His breath was ragged and he needed to take a pause, letting grief take him over as he wailed in the streets late at night. 

You and Dejun walked out of the restaurant happily holding hands and his winter coat around you. You smiled and giggled as you walked to his home. But when you caught a glimpse of Guangheng crying in the street, your first reaction was to run towards him. 

“Guangheng!” you called out to him. He was too busy crying to hear you. He stood in the middle of the street and bawled. Dejun, confused, followed behind you after seeing his friend. 

‘What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” you asked, finally reaching Guangheng, slightly out of breath. You put your hand on his back, bending over to catch a glimpse of his face. He continued to sob, your presence making his experience embarrassing. 

“What happened?” Dejun asked, reaching the both of you. Guangheng couldn’t take this humiliation anymore. His heart literally ached, and you being there wasn’t going to help him. He tried his best to stop crying, hyperventilating. 

“Aww man, calm down. You’re ok, we’re here to help.” you said sympathetically, now rubbing his back. You had no idea what was going on but you wanted to stay by Guangheng’s side now. You pouted as you watched him try to catch his breath, feeling bad for him. Once he finally did, he was able to stand up, back slightly aching from the position he was in beforehand. 

“What’s wrong?” you repeated, seeing that Guangheng was stable enough to answer. Though tispy, he knew not to confess to you; especially not when Dejun was there. Nose red, he looked at the both of you and sniffled. 

“I think I’m just drunk.” Guangheng said, trying his best to make up an excuse, still sniffling. He pushed the air away with his hand, signaling the both of you to leave him. The pain he felt was immense but he wasn’t going to let the both of you watch. You both stood there at stared at him.

“Really. You know how drunk people get. All emotional and shit. I just let the alcohol get the best of me, that’s all.” Guangheng continued, still trying to ward the both of you off. Finally accepting his answer, you nodded. 

“I mean, if you’re sure.” You said hesitantly. But he faked a smile, trying his best to persuade you. Though on the inside, his mind was yelling and screaming at him. Once for letting his love date another man, and the second for letting you see him like this, all because of you. 

You were smart and hard to con, but you were tipsy and seeing Guangheng smile at you and tell you to leave was good enough for you that night. Dejun couldn’t decipher whether his friend was truly in pain either, but he went along with it as well. Examining Guangheng, Dejun looked into his eyes. He knew something wasn’t right but he couldn’t put his finger on it. His sudden outburst in the street wasn’t like him, even when drunk. But what more evidence did he have? Because it didn’t feel right to him? So he let it slide. 

When you finally felt alright leaving Guangheng behind, you turned towards Dejun, grabbing his hand and began to walk back to his house. Still sniffing, Guangheng watched as you and Dejun walked hand-in-hand past him. His heart still ached at the sight. 

Though he saw the physical affection between the two of you, he was in denial. They were gonna break up, his mind told him. It wasn’t like they were going to get married. So, he made the plan to continue to pursue you. He wasn’t ready to accept the romance you both had fostered. Because at the end of the day, to him, you both were just his friend and his crush holding hands and kissing. 

this is not edited, constructive criticism greatly appreciated

[your-world-with-nct]

💌 • wayv reaction :: waking up with wayv

💌 • 𝐤𝐮𝐧

after picking you up from a night out with your friends, kun knew that you’d be ridiculously hungover when you woke up in the morning (or the afternoon, depending on how many drinks you’d had the night before). letting you rest peacefully in your shared bedroom, he prepared a meal that he knew would immediately soothe your migraine - your favourite instant ramen. it wasn’t the healthiest thing, and definitely wasn’t kun’s choice for a breakfast-in-bed, but he knew exactly what worked with you and what didn’t. once you woke up, realising that the space where your lover usually slept was empty, you were met with kun’s bright smile, a steaming bowl of noodles, and a tall glass of water.

“morning, angel! you seemed like you had a lot of fun with your friends, here, have some water— wow, i’m surprised you didn’t throw a toddler tantrum and refuse it like you did last night. i’m kidding!! that definitely, uh, didn’t happen... have your ramen, y/n, baby.”

when you went to pick up your boyfriend from a long day in the recording studio, you were already beyond tired. all you wanted was to head home with ten and fall asleep in his arms. what you didn’t anticipate, however, was how long you’d be waiting for him; you knew he was a perfectionist, but you simply couldn’t sit through him singing the same few lines over and over. not because it was bad (you could never get enough of ten’s vocals), but because your eyelids were drooping and his honey-like voice put you to sleep. your lover’s heart twisted when he saw you curled up on the sofa behind the producers, and he felt guilty for making you wait for him. ten grabbed a pair of headphones and subtly placed them over your ears, blasting one of yangyang’s loud adlibs at an incomprehensible volume, laughing as you shook yourself awake. his guilt quickly dissipated and he was all smiles at your angry pout and messy hair.

“sorry for taking so long, babe, but we’ve got a comfy bed waiting for us at the dorms, so we should probably get going.”

“sorry for taking so long, babe, but we’ve got a comfy bed waiting for us at the dorms, so we should probably get going.”

💌 • 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐰𝐢𝐧

when sicheng agreed to try out an early morning yoga class with you, you were skeptical that one, he agreed, and two, would show up. you told him to wake the two of you up at seven in the morning, so you could get to the class on time and have a well-deserved smoothie or something once you had finished; although you set your own separate alarm around 15 minutes after you told him to wake you, doubting that he’d actually do it. you were, unfortunately, proven right when your snoozed alarm resonated through your bedroom, making sicheng practically jump out of his skin, as you stood at the foot of the bed, with your arms crossed.

“babe, i swear i was gonna do it!! we still have time to get ready and go— no, don’t throw that pillow at me!! wait, you’re already changed? oops!”

💌 • 𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐚𝐬

the strained screams coming from the horror movie you were watching at wayv’s dorm began to fade into silence, as you felt yourself drift into sleep. lucas didn’t notice your weighted head on his chest, too focused on stopping hendery from asking a bunch of questions that were interrupting the film. it wasn’t until he reached over to adjust the blanket on your lap that he realised your eyes were shut and you were lightly snoring. whilst pulling the blanket towards his side, he accidentally elbowed your side, jerking you awake and spilling the bowl of popcorn sicheng had precariously balanced on your head.

“i’m so sorry, sweetheart!! my feet were getting cold and i was trying to fix the blanket, we can go to bed if you’re really that tired, y/n. wait- is that bruise because of me?”

💌 • 𝐱𝐢𝐚𝐨𝐣𝐮𝐧

xiaojun took his airpod out of one ear once he heard the airhostess making an announcement, realising that you were about to start landing. he stilled hearing you sniff against his shoulder, in a peaceful slumber and unaware that you were almost home after a healing holiday abroad.

“y/n, honeysuckle, we’re landing soon. you’re gonna need to wake up, baby, i know, i know you’re sleepy. you can take a nap in the car when kun drives us back, but i need you to be awake now, lovely, okay?”

his sweet whispers brought a half-asleep smile to your face, stretching your achy body in your seat and giving xiaojun a peck on the cheek.

💌 • 𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐲

despite the chaos and noise in the car that hendery, xiaojun and yangyang were in, you managed to catch up on your beauty sleep as you accompanied your boyfriend on the way to one of his pre-recordings. their manager noona leaned over to hendery, warning him that he should wake you up soon since you were close to approaching the kbs building. he reassured her that he’d do it soon, tucking your stray baby hairs behind your ear and pressing a light kiss just below it. he turned back to the members sat behind him, passing on the message that they were almost there, not expecting you to be awake once he faced you again. not feeling his gaze on you, you smiled to yourself and tucked your hair behind your ear again, your fingers brushing the place where hendery’s pillowy lips had so gently grazed across.

“oh... i-i didn’t mean to wake you up, well, not yet, at least. you just looked really cute, baby, i couldn’t resist. what do you mean ‘i don’t have to apologise’, y/n? i disturbed your peace and brought you into those two fighting about kiwis, and for that, i am truly sorry—”

💌 • 𝐲𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐲𝐚𝐧𝐠

it wasn’t an unusual occurence for you and yangyang to fall asleep when dawn broke and wake up at 3pm - specifically during your boyfriend’s non-promotional periods - but you two hadn’t had a proper date in weeks and were planning to wake up to see the sunrise and have a simple but refreshing breakfast of fresh fruits and pastries from a nearby bakery. you two were currently sat at the balcony of your apartment, staring at the miniscule figures zooming around the city at these early hours, after going to sleep at 8pm and setting an alarm for 4am. yangyang couldn’t help but take notice of you trying to keep your heavy eyelids open, silently laughing at your sleepy self. once he spotted the warm glow of the sun rising into the sky, he turned to point something out to you, only just becoming aware of you passed out on his shoulder. he tried, he really did try, to wake you, but couldn’t bring himself to disturb you in such a calm state.

“even though you missed this pretty sunrise, nothing makes me feel happier than looking at my pretty sun. that’s you, by the way, if you didn’t know. yikes, i hope the yangyang you’re dreaming of right now is less awkward than this one.”

[koreanstuffies]

please┊ ༑ ࿐ྂ。

— rt/fav if you’ll use ༉‧₊˚✧

— Hendery (WayV) pack

[suchfluffycherries]

no thoughts head empty just hendery catboy 24/7

[babiesdreams]

hello

can you write sometjibg very vanilla with hendery where he kisses his s/o tummy? jsjsjshjsb idk I don't really have something in mind really,,,,, uhh sjnsdjhd thank you?

Ummm yes, I´m absolutely in love with this idea and I´m really sorry for being inactve for so much time I really didn´t mean to hehe.

Learning to love Huang Guangheng

It was late afternoon when you found out abou your boyfriend´s affair and you needed to get your head away from that, so you decided to call your best friend. Guangheng wasn´t the best at serious kinds of deals, but he always tries his best to cheer you up and you really didn´t have any choice since all your friends move out the city for college.

You ring his doorbell, anxious to get some support from someone. He opens the door quietly. "The cats are asleep" he whispers before smiling at you. You enter carefully, trying your best to not make a single noise. "How are you doing?" The boy sas with a quiet voice. "I´m fine I guess, It´s better to realise when you´re dating a piece of shit" He nods and smile before offering you a "cup of something hot" You couldn´t help but laugh at the weird expression. "I´ll take a tea"

You look at him while he prepares the hot beverages, and something in the way he moves, in the way he smiles and looks at you every now and then, gets you hypnotized. "Here it is" He says getting you back into reality in seconds. "Thank you" You answer with a silly smile.

You both drink your glasses in between jokes, laughs and old embarrasing stories about each other. "You know? I kinda want to lay down in bed for a while" He says looking at you with a smirk. "Is that some kind of offer?" You ask arching a brow. "It is" He says standing up and offering you his hand "Mylady" He says making you laugh loudly just before touching his hand with yours and standing up. You follow him through the corridor up to his bedroom and you both lay down in his king size bed.

He lays his head on your belly and you stay like that in silence for some minutes. No words, just your hand caressing his hair, just his head moving slightly every now and then. Just a kiss over your clothes, just his cold hand moving your shirt up a little bit. Just his hot lips kissing your exposed skin, just the kisses going up every time. Just his lips on your neck, on your jaw. Just his eyes on yours, your eyes closing, his lips on your. Just the best kiss you´ve received.

Just your arms around his back, and his hand under your clothes. Just friends. Just love.

Masterlist –requests open– How to request? Check out your score.

[fckhyuck]

I guess all that changed when I met you - Q.K

tags: fluff, husband material Kun, pregnancy

personal note: I have never written on Tumblr before and I've had a massive writer's block for ages, still kinda have. I usually write long stories and I usually prepare everything before I start to write but this one is spontaneous writing so I don't know how good it turned out to be.

-------------------------------------------------------

"Guanheng! Could you come here!?" I yelled to the hallway.

"What do you need help with?" He asked as he peaked through the doorway.

"Could you paint with me? I'm never gonna finish all this by myself" I asked him and he nodded.

I handed him a brush and we painted the wall together.

Someone knocked on the door. I turned to look that way and I smiled. He walked over to me and hugged me from behind.

"How's it going in here?"

"We're almost done" Hendery answered.

"And how's my beautiful wife?" I put the brush down and turned to look at Kun.

"I'm tired and fat"

"Let's go sit down. I'm sure Hendery can finish this wall, right?"

"Yeah" Hendery agreed.

We went to sit on the couch.

"I wish this baby would come out already. I'm so exhausted" I complained.

"I'm sure she'll come out soon. Have you thought about names?"

"I was thinking about Sulli"

"Like our sister?" Hendery asked as he turned around.

"Yeah. Would you be okay with that?"

"I think she would've loved it"

"Guys" Ten said as he stood by the doorway. We all turned to look his way.

"Dinner is ready, so get your asses downstairs" He said as he walked away.

Kun helped me get up and we walked downstairs. There was a lot of food on display.

"Who made all of this?" I asked.

"We did. We just thought that you two must be really tired with the baby coming and the nursery and all that. So we decided to cook for you" Xiaojun explained.

"Let's eat, shall we?" Yangyang said.

"Where's Winwin?" Lucas asked.

"He said he had to go somewhere" Ten answered.

-----------

After we were done eating, me and my best friend Nini sat in the backyard chairs, taking in the summer air.

"Do you remember how you always said that you're not gonna get married or have kids? Well look at you now" Nini chuckled.

"I know. I guess all that changed when I met Kun"

"I just can't believe you got married before I did" She commented.

"He still hasn't proposed?" I asked.

"No"

"Well have you ever considered proposing? To him?"

"I haven't even thought about that"

Time passed by as we just sat there, enjoying the summer air and the birds chirping.

Suddenly that silence was interrupted by someone opening the back door.

"Ready to go, honey?" Lucas said as he tapped Nini on the shoulder while standing behind her.

"You're leaving?" I asked.

"Yeah, we kinda have to. We have to get up early tomorrow. But we'll come by tomorrow afternoon" She explained as she got up and put on her jacket.

"Okay. Thanks for the meal and I'll see you two tomorrow"

"Bye" They said as they left.

I got up from the chair and went back inside. The guys were cleaning up the kitchen.

"It's getting kinda late so we should probably go" Ten explained.

Ten, Yangyang and Xiaojun took their things and left.

"Shouldn't you be leaving too? it's getting kinda late" I asked my brother.

"I'm not leaving"

"Guangheng" I whined.

"No, I'm not leaving. I'll stay here for a couple of days. I'll sleep in the guest room"

"You don't have to"

"No but I want to. Anything for my little sister"

"Hey! We're twins" I corrected him.

"Yes but I'm still twelve minutes older than you"

I rolled my eyes at his comment.

"Anyways. Thank you. For everything" I said and hugged him.

"I should probably go to sleep. And so should you" He said.

"Yeah yeah, I'll go in a bit. Good night"

"Night" He said and walked upstairs.

I walked to the kitchen and saw Kun sitting by his laptop at the table. I walked to him and hugged him.

"It's late. Let's go to bed"

"Soon. I just need to do a few things"

I sat in a chair next to him.

"Can't you do it tomorrow? I'm tired"

"You can go to bed if you want. I'll come soon"

"But I don't wanna go to bed without you" I said as I pouted. He looked at me and then back at the laptop.

He took a deep breath and said:

"Fine" And closed the laptop.

He took my hand in his and we walked upstairs to our bedroom.

We got under the covers after changing to our pajamas. We turned off the lights. He stroked my hair as well cuddled.

"So how long is your brother staying?" He asked.

"I don't know. He said he'll stay here for a couple days"

"You know he needs to get a life, right?" He chuckled.

"I know. I'm the only family he has left. First we lose our parents at a young age and then our sister. Maybe he feels the need to look after me because he couldn't prevent Sulli's death. I think he blames himself for what happened"

"Well he can stay as long as he wants"

---------

I woke up in the middle of the night to a sharp pain. I turned on the light and saw the sheet were wet.

"Kun, honey wake up" I nudged him.

"What?" He said in a raspy voice.

"I think my water just broke"

His eyes widened and he got up from the bed.

"Oh my god" He rushed to my side of the bed and helped me up. I was trying to steady my breaths.

"Where's the go-to bag?" I asked.

"At the front door"

"What's all the ruckus?" Hendery asked as we were walking down the hallway.

"She's in labour" Kun answered.

"Oh my god!" Hendery said as he rushed to my side.

We got downstairs as fast as possible. Hendery helped me put on my shoes while Kun went to start the car. Hendery walked me to the car with the bag on his shoulder.

-----------

"We got here as soon as possible" Nini said as she and the guys walked in.

I was laying on the bed, with my daughter in my arms.

"Guys. I'd like you to meet Sulli" I announced.

"Hi" Nini said as she came closer.

"What a beautiful name for a beautiful girl" Ten commented.

A year later

"I can't believe we're finally here" I said. I held Sulli in my arms as people were starting to walk to their seats.

"The ceremony is about to start" Kun said. I handed Sulli to him as he walked to his seat.

"Nini said that she wanted to see you" Ten said as he walked by.

I walked to the room where she was and she looked as beautiful as ever.

"Woah" was all I could say.

"Can I ask you something? Were you nervous?"

"Did you really just ask me if I was nervous the day I got married? Did you forget what happened that day? I ran all the way to the train station. I sat there in my wedding dress for hours. Eventually when Kun found me there, he asked me if I wanted to break up. He thought that was the reason I ran. I explained it all to him and the next day we got married at city hall. So no matter how nervous you are right now, just don't do what I did"

"I won't"

"So are you ready?"

"I think so"

-----------

"It truly was a beautiful ceremony" I said.

"Thanks but you can thank Ten for it all though, he planned everything" Lucas said.

"Ohh right Ten. It was a lovely ceremony"

"I know. So was yours until you decided to elope" Ten snarled.

"Sorry about that"

"Anyways. We should make a toast to Nini and Lucas" Ten said as he handed everyone a champagne glass.

"I can't drink" I said.

Kun looked at me confusedly as did everyone else. I looked at Kun, trying to signal him without saying anything.

"Wait, you mean-"

"Yes" I interrupted him.

He picked me up and spun me around excitedly.

"Can someone tell me what's going on?" Nini asked.

"I'm pregnant" I said.

"Oh my god!" Nini yelled.

"Congratulations" Ten said.

"Anyways, where were we? Oh right. To Nini and Lucas, may your marriage last a lifetime"

[mull3ts]

Yk that one vid of doja cat where she said,

"I like noses i like big noses, because..well..because you can kinda like sit on them"

I lost it- and my mind went "a few of the neos have big noses"

Who u might ask? Well

1. Lee Jeno

2. Nakamoto Yuta

3. Liu YangYang

4.Qian Kun

5.Huang Guangheng/Hendery

6.Ten

7.Park Jisung

Shit- there is alot. I think most of the neos

🧴çűmňœñįə

why ofc I've seen that video 😏

wAIT TEN DOES HAVE A BIG ASS NOSE-

[qiankunfics]

KunTen Masterlist Part 2

AO3

1.  Instead of a Rivalry, Can I Have a Romance? by lilyhearted

Summary: Actually, he wouldn’t have even known there was a rivalry in the first place if Hendery hadn’t found that stupid gossip article online. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

2.  gratuitous by fldx

Summary: Ten knows he looks as shameless as he feels. There's no hesitation in the way he spreads his legs further to show off his hole, teasing himself with a single finger. Rating: Explicit  Status: One-Shot

3. Caught Up Over You by easycomeeasygo

Summary: Yukhei laughs and elbows Kun, “He’s looking at our sweet darling Kun-ge like he wants to devour him.” Rating: Mature Status: One-shot

4.  our side of the mountain by andnowforyaya

Summary: Kun and Ten sneak away in the early hours of the morning, before the crew wakes, before the other boys wake, for some quality time together. Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

5. We just need to talk it out by cherrycitrus_blossom

Summary: The last thing Ten wanted was to make Kun feel like he couldn't talk to him, but why didn't Ten notice this earlier? Why did it take one comment from Johnny for Ten to realise that this friendship took more than two steps back? Rating: General Status: One-Shot

6. Flickering by violetpeche

Summary: Brushing your teeth in candlelight is not romantic. Rating: General Status: One-Shot

7.  sirens in my head by thereisnoreality

Summary: Part of murdery martrimony collection Rating: Explicit / Mature Status: One-Shot Trigger: Literally murder mentioned/implied

8.  Apple of My Eye by Lertsek

Summary: Ten wears purple lipstick. Kun likes it. Rating: General Status: One-Shot

9. we are not what we once were by johnjaemark

Summary: Ten and Kun meet again at a party thrown by their record company. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

10. breakfast meal by 10vesick

Summary: Follow-up to the Twit-fic Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

11.  Lift me up by Luonnotar

Summary: Kun just wants to go home and forget about his insufferable colleague, but a technical mishap throws a wrench into his plans Rating: General Status: One-Shot

12. One brick at a time by ForMyBabies (BooksandKpop)

Summary: Ten and Kun get into a fight and Ten is petty so while Kun is at work he covers the whole bedroom floor with legos and waits for Kun to return. Rating: General Status: One-Shot

13. Here Because of the People by eggboyksoo

Summary: Dance teacher and aspiring choreographer Ten moonlights as a cashier at a local supermarket to pay his bills. Kun happens to do his weekly shop during Ten's Monday morning shift. Both carry more baggage than most realise. Rating: Teen Status: On-Going

14.  Pineapples by subbyyang

Summary: Ten reads a very interesting article on the advantages of pineapples. He decides to check the results for himself Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

15.  Extra Practice by subbyyang

Summary: Ten and Kun get the practice room for themselves and don't waste time. Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

16. It was an accident, I swear! by princessgongjunim (MyOwnCharacterInEverything)

Summary: Ten sends a wrong text to Alpha Kun.  Rating: Mature Status: One-Shot

17. we've got till noon, here comes the moon by taeyomi (buttercream)

Summary:  Ten remembers his voice saying it. He also remembers being held by him, how real everything felt. It’s true Ten’s never been in love before so he wouldn’t actually be able to compare, but he’s got an inkling Jackson’s formula wasn’t too far from it. Rating: Mature Status: One-Shot 

18. baby, fuck me with your mic on by jxmxnbabe

Summary: Kun and Ten fuck while the mic is recording Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot 

19. happy hoelloween by violetpeche

Summary: Multi-shots Rating: Explcit Status: On-going

20. messages in blood on my bathroom mirror by jinnieshyun (angelsouls)

Summary: Ten finds blood on his bathroom mirror. It's surprisingly helpful. (And the guy is hot.) Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

21.  a collection of hearts by andnowforyaya

Summary: Who does this guy think he is, walking into Ten’s shop with the most adorable kid in the universe, with hair like that, a smile so blinding it could rival the light of the sun? There has to be a catch.  Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

22.  sugar frosted fruity us by moonwalker116 (mikararinna)

Summary: Ten really likes the sugary sweet frosted cereal flakes that they sell in order to fool children into eating breakfast. Kun wasn't so fond of the cereal. But just like many of Ten's quirks and bits, Kun accepted the fact that Ten really loved those cereals. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

23.  sous-vide this love by kwonjis

Summary: “i see you’ve met ten’s new beau, not a fan of his i’m assuming?” sicheng says dryly. kun huffs and turns away, grabbing a ladle from somewhere and stirring the pot behind him vigorously. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

24.  all's well that ends well (to end up with you) by drmroses

Summary:  Kun finds himself in an urgent predicament as he gets to know Ten Rating: Teen  Status: One-Shot

25.  Make The Stars Align by easycomeeasygo

Summary:  Kun runs around Beijing looking for the cute boy in the yellow sweater. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

26. fear is just a word (heaven just a place) by rowenabane

Summary: The man’s lips flicker upwards at the words, as if Kun has just told a very funny but tasteless joke. “I know.” Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

27.  catching feelings by madhoney

Summary: “You’ve trained so much for this,” Kun said. “You don’t need anyone to take care of you. You don’t need me to take care of you.” Rating: General  Status: One-Shot

28. boy with a heart by andnowforyaya

Summary: “He won’t come out,” Guangheng says, taking his stew from Kun’s hands. “He says his stomach still hurts.” Rating: General Status: One-Shot 

29. bedtime routine by tostitos

Summary: it's just like ten to mess up kun's perfect bedtime routine of coffee and a easy-reading novel with his oral fixation. Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

30. and now we are prey by lunarsoo

Summary: Serial Killer hunts down Agent Kun. Rating: Explicit / Mature Status: One-shot

31. and now we are prey by lunarsoo

Summary: The more Kun knows Ten, the more he realizes he doesn’t know much about him at all. Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

32. love the way you're talking to me by 10vesick

Summary: Ten seemingly doesn’t understand what Kun is saying.  Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

33. you could be the king but watch the queen conquer by thereisnoreality

Summary: Part of murdery martrimony Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

34.  2054 by pinkwinwin

Summary: He was designed this way, after all. Rating: Mature Status: One-Shot

35. it’s been a long, long time. by RedamancyEffect

Summary: Kun couldn’t help but notice how Ten treated him differently since he presented. Rating: General Status: One-Shot

36. 何以歌 (a song with no name) by sayounarahitori

Summary: Kun writes music and waits for Ten. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

37. To The Prettiest Boy in School by Alette

Summary: *Main pairing is Xiaodery but KunTen is cute here too.  Rating: General Status: One-Shot

38. Are They Together or Not? by NovemberSuns

Summary: No one seems to know exactly what Kun and Ten’s relationship is. Yangyang is determined to find out. Rating: Teen  Status: One-shot

39. Coming Home by bInTheMoon

Summary:  Ten, a modern witch, finds himself in the past and get help of Qian Kun, the handsome vampire who is going to show him what home feels like. Rating: Mature Status: One-Shot

40. A Kiss in Your Body by akaashigf

Summary: Kun was managing his crush and relationship with Ten well until one day, he mysteriously woke up in his body. Rating: General Status: One-Shot

41. Is This Your Card? by Kill3rWhal3D1ck

Summary: Ten thinks Kun is pretty cool in his own weird way and wishes everyone would just let him live. Rating: Teen Status: Completed *Part of NCT WayV Hogwarts AU

42.  I'm Not Coming up for Air by zosma

Summary: When Ten can't pull the threads of privacy, of identity and control, away from the performance of his daily life, Kun helps him come down in the one place that's truly private-- the shower. Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

43. What Happened at Yuta’s Party? by NovemberSuns

Summary: From Taeyong getting wasted and Doyoung crying about Jeno growing up to Kun and Ten staring at each other across the room, everyone has something to remember about this particular party. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot 

44. hold on, hold tight by rainingover

Summary: Except now he's got these intermittent stomach aches and he's started to feel guilty about every other thought he has. Mainly the ones about Ten. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

45. i am a lion, i am a queen by kuntenjohnil

Summary: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul turning into a female: Double the trouble. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

46. Cold Coffee by sunsetude

Summary: Kun’s exhausted, but he wouldn’t have it any other way. Rating: Teen Status: One-Shot

47. Missing You by starryeyed (kaylie153)

Summary: Ten doesn't get a lot of alone time anymore on tour with SuperM. So he takes the chances he can get to call his closest friend and confidante in private. Rating: General Status: One-Shot

48. togetherness by andnowforyaya

Summary: After six years, Ten still acted like Baba was the coolest thing since people landed on the moon. Rating: General  Status: One-Shot

49. Kun's Out Of Body Sexting Experience by sayounarahitori

Summary: Ten won't stop sending Kun photos. It… escalates. Rating: Explicit Status: One-Shot

50.  for real by 10vesick

Summary:Ten and Kun had been building this marriage way before either of them had even proposed. Rating: General  Status: One-Shot

[moon-sun-kun]

Fake Texts Masterlist <3

Updated : 29-Sep-20

Requests: OPEN 

WayV

All of them

Crush!WayV think another member revealed their crush on you.

Boyfriend!WayV reacts to you calling another member cute

Boyfriend! Way V takes care of you in that time of the month.

Hendery/KunHang/GuangHeng

Kun

Lucas/Yukhei/Xuxi

Ten/Chittaphon

Daily texts with Boyfriend!Ten

XiaoJun

WinWin / SiCheng

YangYang

NCT Dream

All of them

They hear you crying over a character 

When the Dreamies are tired of Jaemin and his big crush on you

When the Dreamies are tired of Jeno and his big crush on you

Boyfriend! Dreamies reacts to you calling another member cute

Chenle

Haechan/ Hyuck

Daily Texts with your Boyfriend I

Jaemin

When the Dreamies are tired of Jaemin and his big crush on you

Jeno

When the Dreamies are tired of Jeno and his big crush on you

JiSung

RenJun

NCT 127

All of them

Boyfriend!NCT 127 prank you with the text ‘Say hi to your other man’

Boyfriend!NCT 127 reacts to you calling another member cute.

DoYoung

Boyfriend!DoYoung has baby fever

Haechan/Hyuck

Daily Texts with your Boyfriend I

JaeHyun

Boyfriend!JaeHyun has baby fever

Daily Texts with Boyfriend!JaeHyun

Johnny

Boyfriend!Johnny has baby fever

JungWoo

Mark

Boyfriend!Mark has baby fever

TaeYong

Taeil

Yuta

[psycheblog-uk]

Precursor or Sequela: Pathological Disorders in People with Internet Addiction Disorder

Precursor or Sequela: Pathological Disorders in People with Internet Addiction Disorder

Open Access Peer-reviewed Research Article Guangheng Dong , Qilin Lu, Hui Zhou, Xuan Zhao Published: February 16, 2011 https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0014703 Abstract Background This study aimed to evaluate the roles of pathological disorders in Internet addiction disorder and identify the pathological problems in IAD, as well as explore the mental status of Internet addicts prior to…

[o6beynbfi-00bittermelon00]

Mood booster

Sampai sampai aku lupa rasa sedih

Ketawa terbahak bahak

Sampai sakit perut

HAHAHA

THANKS AHENG DERY HENDERY HUANG GUANGHENG WONG KUNHANG

[princeashy]

Effects of the traditional Chinese medicine baicalein on the viability of random pattern skin flaps in rats

Effects of the traditional Chinese medicine baicalein on the viability of random pattern skin flaps in rats

[ad_1]

Renjin Lin,1,2,* Jinti Lin,1,2,* Shihen Li,1,2 Jian Ding,1,2 Hongqiang Wu,1,2 Guangheng Xiang,1,2 Shi Li,1,2 Yijia Huang,2 Dingsheng Lin,1,2 Weiyang Gao,1,2 Jianzhong Kong,1,2 Huazi Xu,1,2 Kailiang Zhou1,2

1Department of Orthopaedics, The Second Affiliated Hospital and Yuying Children’s Hospital of Wenzhou Medical University, Wenzhou 325027, China; 2The Second Clinical Medical College of…