#gummmy rambles

[gomzdrawfr]

Now that mw3 is released…bear with me here as I word vomit im so sleep deprived high and sick dksjdjsjsh anyways

I wanna do another comic, idk what but definitely another angsty one, with Ghoap of course (dont expect em so soon lmao it’s going into my wip)

Its just sad to me, I had this convo with a friend of mine and he mentioned how

“Every happy art about them will never be the same anymore”

Because as much as we WOULD ignore cannon, it’s there, one way or another you have to acknowledge it

Every happy art wont be the same anymore because they never got that happiness and peace in the end

And cHRIST does that rip my heart out into million pieces…

Im thinking of drawing the aftermath, more specifically Ghost…..

From the cutscene we see Soap’s stuff….and Id imagine Ghost takes them…maybe not all but some of them

The photo, the watches, the gloves….

The dog tags.

Which is what im planning to do.

Ghost who wears the dog tag or keep it close to his heart in his chest pocket, the rattling and the bump of the metal that moves with him serves as a reminder that Soap—

Johnny is with him.

And id imagine that before any mission, in the short moment of calm, he’ll pat his pocket or take out the dog tag, rubbing his hand over the cold metal, murmuring a small:

“You with me, Johnny?”

And let’s talk about grieve right? There’s an amazing poem I found, here’s what it says

“Sometimes we dont want to heal because the pain is the last link to what we lost”

— JmStorm

And i think that fits perfectly with Ghost.

People say that it’ll pass, it’ll get better but what if Ghost doesnt want it to get better?

What if he wants to hold onto the “what ifs” and “what could’ve been”

What if he never moved on from that and wakes up a night haunted by the blues of Johnny’s eyes

What if he never want to move on and remained there on the concrete floor….

Because he fears that moving on and acceptance will only increase the chances of forgetting someone entirely

Sooner or later, he’ll forget about his voice….his smell….his smiles his eyes his arms his face

And that thought alone scares him, and so he rekindles back with what he knows best

Anger, sadness and pain

Thriving off the anger and going on a rampage, with disregard of his own safety and being reckless

Thriving off the sadness to remember the last sound he heard from Soap…which was faint and distance, but there nonetheless

Thriving off the pain to fuel his reasons for what he became, for what he could’ve done as he drowns in agony and regret

But i think…..in some moments, where the night is quiet and when the bed’s warm….

He’ll think about the good moments and the banters between them, he has carried their memory as if they’re in a gold locket

On days like this, he’ll bring them out and hold them gently

Cradle with such care that his hands shakes, that his face dampens

No matter how bad it was, there is always Simon who loved Johnny

Yeah…..fuck im sobbing skdjsijsjsha OKAY I’LL STOP—

[gomzdrawfr]

‧₊˚✧Welcome˚₊‧⁺˖ ‎

A lil bit about myself:

Im Gomz (used to go by Gummmy), I have a panda persona

she/her

Im from Malaysia (apa khabar yall) I can speak Mandarin, Malay and English

╭──────────.★..─╮ My socials ╰─..★.──────────╯

My carrd | Twitter (trying to leave but proving hard lol) | blusky (inactive) | Kofi

If you are interested, considering checking out my:

Kofi membership (5USD or 10USD/month)

Shop (free wallpapers)

Commissions (status: OPEN)

╭──────────.★..─╮ Navigation ╰─..★.──────────╯

#gummmyart has all the doodle I drew

#gummmyspeaks has all the rambles I ever talk about

ask response, thanks for the ask <3 is when I answer my inboxes

#gummmywrites has my OC fics -> which you can find some in AO3

#prompt redraw has redraws of incorrect cod quotes

╭──────────.★..─╮ Content ╰─..★.──────────╯

predominantly call of duty fanarts + my cod oc

My masterlist of my contents (these are only a fraction of what I draw)

occasionally I reblog other stuff or memes, which are tagged as words, memes or other fandoms

╭──────────.★..─╮ OC ╰─..★.──────────╯

Main OC that I will yap about is my cod oc Raven

I do oc x cannon content

everything about my oc is tagged with [oc]Raven or Raven[oc]

Her masterlist

Her character sheet

Her color palette

Raven fanbox (collection of fanart of my oc from my friends and followers)

╭──────────.★..─╮ Q&A ╰─..★.──────────╯

1. I like your doodles, can I set it as my profile picture/header/banner?

yes you can! just make sure you credit me ♡

2. Can I draw your oc?

yES BY ALL MEANS!! if you do just tag me and I'll be happy to come see ♡♡♡

3. Can I expand your doodles? (ex: continue the story, make a fic, make another drawing etc)

yes, yes you can, again just tag me when you do! im always excited to see what other takes other people have

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Enjoy your stay <3