#hamada asahi angst

[peachisthenewblack]

◇ EVEN AFTER EVERYTHING

synopsis: You were the bad girl. He was ever so faithful. What happens when he’s had enough?

snapshot: 99.9% angst, female reader, boyfriend Junkyu, colleague Jaehyuk, infidelity, drunk, one-night stand, is this a happy ending

sky says: Here’s a story I wrote a looooooong time ago that I published on another platform, just to serve as a teaser of my writing prowess (>_<) my actual writing skills may have deteriorated though [I hope not!] Also, obviously I tweaked the original so that the story could fit Treasure… if you enjoy this please feel free to send a request! [here’s why]

◇ The Fight, If It Was Even One

You wipe the counter, missing the sprinkling of crumbs right in front of you. Your eyes are looking straight at it without actually seeing it. It’s the way you usually are these days, ever since the fight. The one that happened right in this very kitchen, if it could even be called a fight.

“Why is he here?” he had asked.

“He was drunk last night and gave my address to the taxi driver. It was nothing,” you had insisted. You had shrugged your shoulders and sipped from your coffee mug.

“It’s not nothing if he spent the night here!” he had hissed at you. How dare he.

“So what if he spent the night? This wouldn’t be the first time...” your voice had trailed off as you realised your blunder. You had bit your lip and glanced at him, wondering how he’d take that in.

He had stood there fuming. The muscles in his right cheek, the side that had been facing you, had twitched from the way he had gritted his teeth.

The person in question had appeared at the kitchen entrance then, only halfway done pulling his own shirt over his head, allowing the two people in the kitchen a glimpse of his well-toned abs.

“Noona, I think I’ll be going now. Thanks for...” he had shot a look at the man still standing motionless near the sink, then smirked to himself and continued mysteriously, “...last night.”

“Wait... aren’t you at least going to finish your coffee?” you had asked.

“That’s okay, I’ve had some. Besides, Junkyu hyung’s here now. I’ll just be in the way.”

“Well, let me just walk you out.”

“Really, it’s fine noona. I can let myself out. See you at work?”

“Oh alright. Yeah, see you.”

Junkyu had waited until he heard the faint sound of the front door click shut before he spoke.

“_______, I can’t do this anymore. Last time I believed you. This time... I don’t know. After what I saw, I just... I don’t know.”

You had looked up then. Am I hearing things? Has he finally grown some balls? Have I really pushed it too far this time? You had cleared your throat and put on your best poker face. “You’ll forgive me. Just like you always do. This time won’t be any different.”

At your words, he had looked resigned. “Are you saying that what I thought happened last night, happened?”

“What do you think?” you had replied, a challenge clear in your voice.

“Then it’s over.” Just like that, he had left.

You waited two weeks for his call: it never came. He didn’t text you to tell you that you were forgiven, like always. He didn’t come by the bar where you worked. In fact, there was no word from him at all. You weren’t worried, not at the time. You knew it would take him time. Another two weeks should do it. You weren’t going to panic and call or look for him. Oh no, you weren’t one to do that. He’d be back soon enough. Meanwhile, there was plenty of other game. You had thought of Jaehyuk then, and felt kind of guilty towards both of them.

◇ The Past, When It All Started

You knew you weren’t pretty, not what people would ordinarily call pretty anyway. Because of that, you made up for it with an aura of confidence that was irresistible to the people around you. You were no stranger to attention. In high school you hadn’t fit in anywhere--partly because you didn’t want to--but you always had a string of boys following you around, worshipping the ground you walked on. Hell, you’d even had a girl ask you out. And although girls really didn’t pique your interest, the way you’re attracted to him might have just proven that wrong. His baby face and full pouty lips. That smooth jawline. Unblemished clear skin. You would’ve thought he was a girl if it weren’t for his school uniform. You did think he was a girl that first time you two met, until he stood up.

“What do you think you’re doing?” you had asked the person you noticed lurking behind the bushes.

“Um... watching you play?” Such a bold answer from someone who’d been trying so hard not to be seen. It had totally taken you by surprise, which wasn’t something easy to do.

“Me, why?” The person had shrunk even lower behind the shrubs at your question. You had waited for an answer but when none came, you had said, “never mind if you’re not going to tell, keep on watching then”. And you had grabbed the ball you came for off the ground and flounced away.

“I like you!”

You had turned around, surprised once again. Twice in as many sentences. He had stood where you could see him, away from the bushes. You had liked what you saw straightaway.

You two had been together ever since.

Four years.

And you had never been faithful.

Maybe it was partly his fault. He kept on being so forgiving. Even when he had found you locking lips with Haruto, the dashing basketball team captain, behind the bleachers in the gym. Even when you had told him you’d be studying at the library, but his best friend Jihoon saw you making out in the art room with some guy. Even when you had broken off your date, countless times over the years, to go out with someone else. Even when he stopped by your workplace, just to keep you company on your breaks from DJing, and you had flirted with the good-looking younger bartender right in front of his eyes.

Always, he would just shrug his shoulders and say that you were just being yourself.

“I love you, because you’re you. You are your own person, and I wouldn’t change that for the world” is what he would say every time you asked if he was angry at you for the things you did.

But that fateful morning he had come to your house to see if you wanted to go get breakfast together, let himself in with the spare key you yourself had given him, found you in the kitchen with that same bartender, who was shirtless and hugging you from the back, had that conversation with you, and something must have snapped in him. For the first time in four years, Junkyu went away.

And stayed away.

The two weeks that you had thought would be enough had turned into two years. You had feared for the worst when he still hadn’t contacted you after two months. Your calls had gone straight to voicemail. You had found out that he resigned from his job. And moved out of his apartment. He had vanished, just like that. Out of your life, without so much as a single word of goodbye.

You had been living with many regrets these past two years. You should have been faithful. You should have treated him better. You should have shown him how much he means to you. You should have explained to him that he’s the only one you love. You should have told him you didn’t mean to hurt him. You were just worried that if you weren’t wanted by other guys, he wouldn’t want you either. You should have realised that you were being stupid, thinking stupid things and behaving even more so.

You should never have cheated on Junkyu. For quite a while you hadn’t intended to. Except when you started work as a DJ at one of the hottest nightclubs around town, things tend to happen. Especially when there’s a private function every other weekend, and leftover booze already paid for by the client gets shared among the staff. When you started working there, you managed to stay relatively sober at first. By the third private party, however, you had woken up the day after in somebody else’s bed. You had been so plastered, you didn’t even remember Jaehyuk taking your home.

◇ The Affair, Unintentional As It Was

Jaehyuk is hot, you had to admit that. And the youngster was really good at his job, which meant he could do those fancy things bartenders do just to show off, like flipping glasses in the air and juggling bottles, all while flirting with customers and fixing their drinks. Which meant he was a performer while being a bartender, and that only added to his hotness factor. He was also very much into you, which he had made clear from the first day you came to work. And although you had been very flattered at getting the attention of a younger man, you hadn’t meant to take things any further, even after you two had slept together.

And then it had happened again.

You hadn’t even been drunk. You had actually been stressing in your head for one whole day over what to get Junkyu for your upcoming anniversary and then, at work, some drunk had jumped up onto your DJ platform and managed to grope you before club security got to him. You had been shaken up by the incident and Jaehyuk had been so nice, giving you a drink to calm your nerves and offering to send you home after work. The two of you had talked during the drive and he had given you some good suggestions for Junkyu’s gift. When you arrived at your apartment, you had been the one to invite him up for a drink.

That time too, Junkyu had come to your house in the morning. He had seen Jaehyuk leaving and asked you about it, and you had lied. Although he looked at you somewhat suspiciously, he had believed you. You didn’t think much about it, until he had opened his mouth later when you were having breakfast together.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if you have something going on with that boy. I swear, those abs can really turn someone’s head.”

Amazed that he had even noticed, you had asked, “and exactly when and where would you have seen his abs?”

“Remember when your nightclub had that new year staff party and I came early with you to help? I happened to come out of the bathroom stall when he was changing his t-shirt.”

You had jokingly asked whether you should start getting worried about losing him to a guy and the two of you had laughed over that. But he had got you worried.

You had worried about being caught cheating on Junkyu with Jaehyuk. That you would get caught was inevitable: you always got caught. But the things you had done had always been one-time stuff. With people you had just met, or people you barely knew or had once known. You had never before been involved with a colleague, or a friend. And Jaehyuk was both. And you had worried whether that would be too much for Junkyu when he finally found out.

You quit your DJ job not long after he left. You couldn’t look at Jaehyuk and not be reminded that Junkyu was gone. Jaehyuk tried to make you stay, to forget Junkyu and be with him, but you stood by the decision you had made about your relationship that same day Junkyu last stood in your kitchen.

Late the night before, you had opened your door to the sound of the doorbell and an older man had stood there, struggling under Jaehyuk’s weight. You had taken Jaehyuk off the taxi ahjusshi, thanked him and put the tipsy Jaehyuk to bed. Of course you had ended up sleeping together yet again. But you had woken up very early in the morning, with an uneasy sense of foreboding. You couldn’t shake it off to go back to sleep, so you had gone into the kitchen to make coffee and breakfast.

You had sensed somebody watching you while you were pan-frying the second omelette. A shirtless Jaehyuk had been leaning against the kitchen counter watching you cook, all the while smiling that sweet smile of his. You had poured him a cup of coffee, and set down the omelette. In your head, you had been pondering how to broach the subject. When Jaehyuk had finished with his food and pushed his plate away to finish his coffee, you knew you couldn’t stall the matter any longer.

“Jaehyuk, I think we shouldn’t do this anymore.”

He had looked up from his cup, dismay all over his adorable face. “What are you talking about, noona?”

“I know you like me, but I don’t feel the same for you.”

“But noona...”

You had grabbed his plate and taken it to the sink. Standing there busying yourself with the washing, you had pondered your words carefully to try to be gentle. “I really hope you won’t make this difficult, Jaehyuk. We can still talk at work as usual. There’s just some things you have to stop doing. Like, you can’t just crash here whenever you feel like it. Like last night. And stop showing up at my door just because you’re ‘in the neighbourhood’. You don’t even live near here. You need to stop doing these things.”

You had flinched a little when you felt Jaehyuk’s arms snake around your waist. He had rested his cheek on your shoulder and whispered, “but noona, I don’t just like you. I love you.”

You had been struck speechless with the thought of causing him agony for that, but the feeling was fleeting. The moment to be gentle had passed. “That’s really too bad Jaehyuk, ‘cause I’ve never been serious with you.”

Jaehyuk had stiffened at your words. “No, noona, that can’t be. You feel something for me, I know you do.”

“Don’t kid yourself,” you scoffed. He had grabbed your shoulders and turned you around then, so that he could look you in the eyes, and that had been when you noticed the other person in the kitchen.

“________.” You become conscious that you’re staring into empty space. It’s almost as if you had really heard his voice. You look at the counter you have been absently wiping and see a few droplets of water among the crumbs. You raise one hand to your cheek: you don’t even realise you have been crying. You look back at the spot where Junkyu had stood two years ago, and more tears run down your cheeks. For two years you have held them away; two years of telling yourself he will be back, he always comes back. Two years of pretending nothing has gone wrong while your heart ached, burning with the emptiness of missing him. Two years of knowing you brought this on yourself and there’s no one else to blame. You couldn’t do this anymore. Just like two years ago, when Junkyu couldn’t deal with you anymore. You break down on the kitchen floor, sobbing uncontrollably, the crumbs on the counter forgotten.

◇ The Lesson, Learnt The Hard Way

Junkyu knows he had gone away for a long time. He couldn’t help but wonder: have you changed? Would you still remember him? Absence may make the heart grow fonder, but being out of sight might also result in being forgotten. He had been trying so hard to stay away, but it had been difficult, and the difficulty had not lessened with each day that passed.

Right now, he is home. It’s true he had ended things, or put them on hold the way he saw it, but deep down in his heart nothing has really changed. You still own his heart, completely and utterly. There’s nothing in the world that can destroy that, not even all your infidelities, and no amount of time will ever erase that fact. He stands in front of your apartment, the first time in two years, and hopes that the scene inside will not be like the last time. He reaches for the spare key in his pocket--he hadn’t returned it when he went away--and inserts the key in the lock.

You are sitting on the floor in the kitchen. Your eyes are dry now, you are silent. Your breathing is no longer wracked with sobs. You feel tired, like you haven’t slept in days. You grab at the kitchen stool near you to pull yourself up to stand, and that’s when you notice the other person in the kitchen.

You look at the man who is standing in the exact spot where Junkyu had stood two years ago. He seems so real. You’re not going to convince yourself he is, though, not this time. Just your imagination gone wild, you’re used to that now. But you do notice that he doesn’t look the same as how you always remember him. He looks… older somehow. He also looks lonely, well that hasn’t changed. He looks sad, that hasn’t changed either. No, despite these little differences you know he’s just a figment of your mind, brought up by your aching need to see him. You shake your head to vanquish the thought, and go to the sink to wash the rag you have been using to wipe the counter.

“_______.”

The voice startles you, you almost drop the rag. It’s almost as if you had really heard it. You continue to rinse the cloth. A part of you is telling you that the voice is real, but you couldn’t bring yourself to believe it. You have waited to hear that voice for two years. You’ve heard it so often in your mind, and you have always been disappointed. No, you tell yourself. No, it’s not real.

You flinch a little when you feel arms snake around your waist. A warm body against your back.

“_______, I’m home.” Warm breath against your neck.

You drop the rag this time. You twist around to face him, still in his arms. That baby face and smooth jawline. Unblemished clear skin. The thick dark hair you love so much. You reach up to touch his face. Warm skin under your hand. He smiles, pulls your hand to his lips and kisses your palm. You have voided your eyes of tears just a short while ago, yet they flow freely again in the joy of this moment.

You throw your arms around Junkyu’s neck and cries for the second time that day. He has come home.

Junkyu hugs you tightly and kisses your hair. His hand rubs soothing circles on your back. He is home.

All is forgiven once again.

[goddamnosamu]

Two Ghosts Falling

Part 2 of [12:49am]: Writing songs is not easy

Pairing: idol!Asahi x reader 

Word count: 1373

Warning: alcohol mention but nothing too serious

A/N: This was so long overdue, and I’m really sorry for that. It’s just been pretty hectic with stuff that’s going on in my life but I decided to at least make a part 2 of the story that I first wrote and posted in this account. I’m thankful for all the hearts and reblogs, it truly makes me happy that people continue to like my work even if I’m gone for a long time. I’ll try to post once things start to look up for me, but for now please enjoy this. I apologize for the pain LMAO I love angst <3 leave a comment, reblog, or heart if you enjoyed it.

“In short, I screwed up,” 

Of course, the shock that his members had on their faces was enough to tell that they were disappointed in him, albeit won’t really say it to his face. It was painfully obvious; who was even to blame for a relationship that felt one-sided despite the two loving each other? Asahi doesn’t even know what time it was when he finished telling his break-up story to the members. Without hearing a word from them, he left the room trying to calm himself down because he never really learned how to cope with the pain that he caused to both of you. Writing his thoughts didn’t help anymore, bottling up his feelings will only leave him crying for hours, and painting will only end up with art that resonates with his agony from both the stress of being an idol and losing you. Thinking back, he never really knew how to cope because he was always met with your comfort when he was stressed. 

It’s been months and he still can’t bring himself to go out. The only time he does go out is when he has a schedule for the day or one of the members promised free coffee. Anything other than that, he only checks the lives of other people on social media. Surprisingly, you didn’t block him in your account and you retained your account for the public to see. He could see you succeed in the stories you told him about, and even the little celebration posts. Asahi continues to see you striving in your own life without him, yet he is still miserable the day you left him. He wanted to patch things up with you; try to tell you that he needs you and he regrets his actions. But when that time does come, he’s afraid he’ll run out of things he can say to bring you back. 

At an early night, Asahi reluctantly agrees to spend a night in a bar with the other members. The members were pestering him about it and he only went just to get them off his back. He has been stressed enough already, but he really didn’t think that alcohol will solve his problems. Arriving at the local bar, Asahi was immediately welcomed by the strong scent of alcohol and the blaring music coming from the speakers around the bar. He was immediately dragged by Jihoon to the bartender and ordered a drink for the both of them. As soon as they got their drinks, where Asahi doesn’t even know what Jihoon got for him, he was left alone to ponder his thoughts and alcohol ready for his escape. 

Asahi doesn’t know how long they’ve been in here, but all he knows is he’s at his 4th cocktail. He was tipsy, but he manages to get a hold of himself for the time being in case the other members needed help going home. He admits to himself that the alcohol has helped a bit in forgetting; his mind is more focused on the music and seeing some of the members laugh their asses off on the dance floor. 

“Hamada Asahi. Here I thought you completely locked yourself up in the studio.”

It can’t be. 

“(y/n)?” Asahi said shakily, his eyes immediately filled with remorse. He knew it was inevitable that you’d meet each other, but he doesn’t expect it to be this early – denying the fact that he was just afraid to see you while he was still at his lowest. 

“How have you been?” you answered, completely unfazed by his heavy demeanor while you sat beside him. 

“Still locked in the studio, the others just dragged me here.” Asahi recovered from his shock, grabbing confidence from the alcohol he has. 

“How about you?’

“Oh, you know – same old, same old. Finally getting on track with my life and what I wanted to do,”

Asahi knew what you were talking about – of course, he does. The achievements on your social media, the updates about your life he hears when the others talk about you; you were practically there in every corner he looks. He looks at you as you waved to a person he’s unfamiliar with, probably a colleague you met from your now successful life. He’d wish for you to elaborate more, even if the stories were already told by you or others. It was too selfish for him to think of wanting to get back with you but needs to hear it from you, even if it meant that he was going to hurt again in the next couple of months.

“You know, I never wanted things to end,” he whispered, although you completely heard him. “All I ever wanted was to be by your side. I never knew how to write songs anymore because I lost all my inspiration for it. I’m sorry, but I can’t deal with the fact that you probably won’t talk about me to anyone or someone you wouldn’t want around or –”

“You are so fucking selfish.”

He looked at you in shock. Tears well up in your eyes as you bite your lip to prevent yourself from breaking down right then and there.

“You don’t get to decide what should I be in the relationship. You don’t even have the right to say that I’m the reason you’re miserable. How about me, Asahi? Did you ever stop and consider how I was feeling? The whole time in that relationship, I never even felt the love you bragged to others or the songs you wrote about me.” you stared at him while he can’t even bring himself to look at you. He knew you were right. This was what he wanted, right? For you to say what you’ve always wanted to say after the breakup. He looked at you as you continued. 

“And the worst part of all of that was that I still loved you.”

“I’m sorry.” pathetic, he thinks about himself.

“It’s already too late for that,” you murmured as you stared at your half-empty glass. 

“Look, I know I broke a lot of what I promised you when I dated you–”

“You didn’t just break promises, Asahi. You broke me, and honestly, I don’t know why I even continue to sit beside you right now and explain yourself.” you spat at him while paying for your drink. You were about to walk away when I suddenly grabbed your hand.

“Please don’t leave. I don’t know what I am now without you,” his tears were falling at this point. You both were probably getting stares but Asahi didn’t care. All he wanted was you, even if it meant that you both will try to remember how it feels to be one again.

“Let go, Asahi.”

“No, I don’t want to. Please just hear me out, I’ll–”

“And why the fuck should I listen to you? I said let go.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt you” his voice quivered, full of hurt and despair. He didn’t know what else to say other than apologies and desperation. 

“But you fucking did, didn’t you? You fucking did,” you scowled at him as your tears were now running down your cheeks.

You removed his hand from your arm and immediately left. He continues to kneel on the floor, trying to process everything that happened while his hands were on his head. His head was pounding and his body felt like giving up, but his chest was the most painful of all. It was like his heart was breaking again after it was pieced together forcefully. He gets the feeling that you’ll never need him again – he knew you didn’t but what other choice did he have to at least get through the day? He continued to hope before today, but tonight and the days to come will definitely feel like falling into a hole of despair where he won’t know how to save himself anymore. When he looks up, he never saw you again. All he heard was one of the members trying to get him to come back to his senses but his mind was too focused on remembering how his heart was supposed to beat without you, forever.

[blossominghunnie]

𝐙𝐨𝐦𝐛𝐢𝐞 𝐀𝐩𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐲𝐩𝐬𝐞

Day 2

Pairing: Hamada Asahi x fem!oc

Genre: Horror, zombie apocalypse au, all of us are dead inspired

Summary: One day Haneul was a normal student and the next she was running from zombies with her almost boyfriend, her friends and classmates, trying to survive.

Warning: Cussing, mentions of death, blood, zombies

Notes: Had to include a zombie apocalypse jsjs.

Haneul never imagined her junior year of high school to go like this. She was supposed to keep her good grades, and have a great time with her friends, before applying to her dream school to study medicine.

But life had other plans, she supposed.

Instead, she, Asahi, her friend group and some classmates were running from the eating flesh monsters they’ve been calling zombies.

“Hurry, get in here!” Someone shouted as they opened the door to a classroom on the third floor.

“Come on, come on!”

“AH!” Haneul heard someone scream, she was in the middle of the group so she had to jump a little to see who it was.

Horrified, she turned around and started weeping. She felt a hand intertwining with hers. “Are you okay? What happened?”

She couldn’t speak until almost all were safe and sound on the classroom.

“Hayun was bitten.” She started crying.

“Oh, honey.” He hugged her tightly. “I’m so sorry.”

The girl couldn’t believe it, she lost her best friend since she was 3.

“I know it’s tough but you know I’m always here for you.”

“Thank you, Sahi.” She hugged him tightly.

“Anytime, Hannie.”

Days passed and more friends and classmates were transformed to zombies, reducing the once big group to a small group of 7; Haneul, Asahi, Junkyu, Jeongwoo, Yoshi, Jihoon and Jaehyuk.

The moral was too low because of this but if they wanted to keep surviving they needed a new plan.

“I know we are devastated cause of the losses we’ve had but we need to keep moving.” Jihoon spoke looking at his remaining friends.

“Ji is right, we can morn once we are safe.” Jaehyuk backed him up.

“Alright, what’s the plan?” Asahi asked from his place against the wall. Haneul was cuddled up on his right arm, looking dissociated. The past couple of days hadn’t been the best. She was fine one minute and the next she felt like shit.

She was grateful the blonde never left her side.

She had a “complicated” relationship with Asahi. They weren’t a couple but they definitely weren’t friends. They were very touchy with the other, at least in private he was too. In public he limited himself to hand holding and hugging.

He was planning on asking her to be his girlfriend when all hell broke loose. She meant everything to him and wanted to make things official.

He would have to do it once this mess was over.

Anyway, the group agreed to leave the classroom at sunrise, and head straight to the woods where they would look for a shelter for survivors.

Thankfully it was raining by the time they had to go, which meant it would make zombies go numb and it would be easier for them to walk pass them.

They carefully speed walked and killed any creature that tried to attack them.

Asahi had Haneul by the hand and tried his best for her to not see any of her dead friends, she was pretty sensitive so he knew seeing them again and in that state would break her even more.

They successfully made it to the woods without getting hurt.

That was until they reached a street, and walked farther. There, they saw a big amount of zombies.

Freaking out, they hold their weapons tighter and pointed to their heads.

They were struggling but had a good pace so they didn’t come too close to them.

Until Asahi got distracted for a second.

“ASAHI! LOOK OUT.” Haneul shouted, not caring that more zombies could come.

By the time he turned around one bit him on the leg.

“NO!” The girl cried hard and ran to help him. She killed the pest and held the blonde, placing him on the floor.

“You’re gonna be okay, love.” She repeated over and over, it felt as if it was more to comfort herself than for the Japanese.

Meanwhile he just looked at her with glassy eyes. He caressed her cheek softly.

“Thank you for everything, princess. I never got to tell you but I wanted to make you my girl and that I also love you so so much.” A tear fell slowly as he finished what he thought were gonna be his final words.

“I love you so much too, Sahi. And I would have loved to be your girlfriend.” She sobbed and hugged him tightly.

“Han, we have to go. There’s more coming.” Yoshi worriedly said.

“B-but I can’t leave him.”

“We have to, I’m sorry.” He looked at her with a sad expression.

“But it doesn’t look like he’s transforming. He could be a hambie.” She insisted, calling him a term that one of their late friends used to describe a psycho classmate that tried to kill them at the beginning of the crisis.

He sighted. “Okay, but if he turns we’ll need to kill him. Now come on, let’s get out of here.”

She nodded and grabbed the blonde with the help of Jeongwoo. Putting his arms around their shoulders.

They continued their journey until they saw a jail that was being used as a Safe Zone.

The doctors there ran some tests, asked them a few questions and in no time they were on their own tents, located by the quarantine zone.

The pair was laying down on the mattress that was provided to them, cuddling. Haneul had her head on his chest and Asahi had his arm around her waist.

Turns out, he indeed was a hambie. He was perfectly fine, so far.

The blonde asked the girl the long awaited question right after they settled so, they could proudly say they were finally dating.

Them and their friends could feel like everything was okay, at last.

But only time would tell what was going to happen next.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

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[thekwriter]

hello ! I’m new here !

I made this account to be able to put into words all of your daydreams :)

For the moment i will only write about treasure, requests are open for any of your fantasies but please stay respectful.

[alohajun]

[💎] ────────── TREASURE

[ makeout sessions ] | [ student tutors ] | [ dance ] | [ hoodie : hyung + middle line ] | [ hoodie : maknae line ] | [ meeting your grownups ] | [ home from tour ] | [ jealous ] | [ calling their full name ] | [ removing your promise ring ] | [ uncomfortable ] | [ fights ] | [ south asian s/o ] | [ wiping their kiss ] | [ shivering ] | [ silent treatment ]

[🐷] ────────── CHOI HYUNSUK

─ happy anniversary to me :: [smau]

─ death of me :: [crack, fluff, suggestive]

─ rainbow cheetah :: [best friends au, platonic fluff, crack]

─ 친구, 내 남자친구 :: [established relationship, angst, fluff]

[🐼] ────────── PARK JIHOON

─ wanna eat ramen with me? :: [love at first sight, crack-fluff]

─ the yellow jacket biker :: [angst, fluff]

─ anxiety and relief :: [all of us are dead au, angst, fluff]

─ halloween shenanigans :: [best friends au, platonic fluff, crack]

─ 2AM kisses :: [established relationship, suggestive]

[🐯] ────────── KANEMOTO YOSHINORI

─ pickup lines :: [fluff, confession au]

─ more fun with you :: [fluff, blind date au]

— happy endings :: [established relationship, fluff]

[🐨] ────────── KIM JUNKYU

─ like magic :: [harry potter au, fluff, confession au]

— good news :: [established relationship, fluff]

— love to me :: [unrequited love, best friends au, angst]

[🐹] ────────── TAKATA MASHIHO

─ tteokbokki feasts and i love yous :: [established relationship, fluff]

─ marry you :: [fluff, proposal au]

─ stay with me :: [exes to lovers]

[🦁] ────────── YOON JAEHYUK

— i won't get hurt, i promise :: [angst, fluff, best friends au]

─ you promised you wouldn't get hurt :: [angst, best friends au]

─ really too nice :: [comfort, fluff]

— i'm all yours :: [established relationship, fluff]

[🤖] ────────── HAMADA ASAHI

─ my savior :: [angst, fluff]

— i love you, little one :: [parents au, fluff]

[🦊] ────────── BANG YEDAM

— cotton candy kisses :: [noona romance, fluff]

— cuddles and tea :: [established relationship, fluff]

— bonita-nita 네가 :: [platonic fluff]

[🐰] ────────── KIM DOYOUNG

─ graduation confession :: [academic rivals to lovers, confession au]

─ say kimchi :: [mysterious class au, established relationship, fluff]

─ piano :: [friends to lovers, fluff]

─ i'm sorry :: [angst, established relationship]

[🦙] ────────── WATANABE HARUTO

— how well can you dance? :: [mysterious class au, fluff, crack]

— being adorable :: [established relationship, fluff]

— ice-cream store oneesan :: [strangers to friends, fluff]

— ice-cream store oneesan ii :: [friends to lovers, confession au]

[🐺] ────────── PARK JEONGWOO

─ not meant to be :: [angst, fluff, break up au (sorta)]

─ the seven stages of falling for your best friend :: [angst, fluff]

─ crimson glory :: [established relationship, crack, fluff]

─ as a man :: [noona romance, fluff, pining, confession au]

[🐮] ────────── SO JUNGHWAN

─ love is dead :: [established relationship, fluff, angst]

— pretty you :: [strangers to friends, fluff]

— clingy :: [established relationship, fluff, angst]

━━━━━━━ © 2023 ALOHAJUN

[jikjinz]

͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ [WELCOME TO JIKJINZ'S TREASURE MASTERLIST] ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

these works may contain MATURE CONTENT and therefore, MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DON'T INTERACT!!!

KEY: m - mature/smut; a - angst; f - fluff; c - crack/humour; sg - suggestive

CHOI HYUNSUK

I'VE BEEN WAITING (m) (f) (a)

yours truly, the innocent angel! (sg)

princess treatment! (sg)

five-star michelin (m)

PARK JIHOON

nothing yet...

KANEMOTO YOSHINORI

facesitting with yoshi (m)

KIM JUNKYU

YOU, I LOVE YOU! (f)(a)

heart eyes (a)(m)

cause i'm like yes & no (m)

YOON JAEHYUK

nothing yet...

HAMADA ASAHI

nothing yet...

KIM DOYOUNG

MOOD FOR LOVE (m)

you got me starin' like a fool! (m)

say it, darlin'! (m)

cause i'm like yes & no (m)

BANG YEDAM

pretty when you cry (m)

TAKATA MASHIHO

nothing yet...

WHOLE GROUP

perv! treasure headcanons (m)

treasure overstimulating their partners (m)

@ jikjinz & sha-la-la, do not repost or translate without permission !

[gorae]

masterlist

browse through #nai's! 🩷 to read everything!

nct 01. chapped lips (na jaemin, fluff)

enha 01. feeling better now? (sim jaeyun, fluff) 02. wish you were sober (park jeongseong, fluff)

svt 01. eyeliner 101 (lee jihoon, fluff)

txt 01. your eyes (choi yeonjun, angst)

tbz 01. two's company, three's a crowd (kim sunwoo, fluff)

treasure 01. elevator music (park jihoon, fluff) 02. paper airplanes (hamada asahi, fluff)

[acaiasahi]

✶ pancakes for dinner ; hamada asahi

synopsis. you confess your love for your best friend before your plane crashes.

info. angst. hamada asahi x gn!reader. 689 words.

warnings. plane crash, crying, free falling (?), allusions of death (not specified but reader DOES NOT die), grammar errors, lowercase + smaller text intended, proofread, lmk if i'm missing anything!

[ now playing . . . ] pancakes for dinner by lizzie mcalpine

the plane jerks forward and causes your hands to grip onto the seat's arm rests. your breath is held in your lungs, too afraid that one tiny exhale will cause a butterfly effect.

pure fear wracks through your body, eyes screwed shut but ultimately opening as you look out the plane's window.

the sky resembles a nautical blue hue and as the plane begins drooping, your heart tumbles within your chest like loose change in a tote bag.

matcha-colored hills take over the sapphire sky, the plane slightly dropping before recovering and although the fear is most definitely prominent within your body, you can't help but feel utter regret.

it's a mush of a emotions really. feelings upon feelings, words being muddled and unspoken. yes, pure regret.

flashes of moments with your loved ones leave as quickly as they come, but soon come to a screeching halt upon one boy.

the boy that's your best friend. god, the boy who makes you feel love, anger, guilt. the boy who stares at you like you put the stars in the sky but you somehow always miss his longing gaze.

hamada asahi.

the world's most beautiful boy who you love so dearly is patiently waiting for you at the airport with a bouquet of flowers in his hands, completely oblivious to how your plane keeps drooping lower and almost ready to crash into the deep, verdant green hills.

mustering all the strength within, you remove your white-knuckled hands off the arm rests, whipping your phone out to call him.

your fingers tremble as you swipe through your contacts to find him. quickly pressing the 'call' button, the ringing ends and an automated voice appears.

the person you are trying to currently reach is not accepting calls. please press one to leave a voicemail.

the hope in your body dissolves, hands shakily removing the device from your ear to press the 'one' button. curse him for always having his phone on do not disturb.

you sigh, completely ignoring the automated voice who walks you through the instructions until the sound of the beep blares into your ears.

"asahi, it's y/n. t-this plane is getting super crazy an-and i'm scared that there's gonna be an accident and i won't b-be able to see yo-you again," your words tumble around in your mouth, quite literally speaking just to speak at this point. you sigh, attempting to ignore the horrified screams of the other passengers as you continue.

a panicked laugh leaves your chapped lips, "i should tell you this, y-you deserve to know. i want to eat pancakes for dinner with you, a-and i wanna get stuck in your head, or do that super cringey thing where we dance and kiss in the rain," your laugh is genuine at the thought of doing these mundane things with your best friend.

"it sounds stupid, i know," you begin, hesitancy practically seeping through as you try to find the right words. "i love you, i'm in love with you. i always have been, i love you, i love you, i love you," your words are on repeat like a broken record as you begin to cry. tears falling freely like a waterfall, streaks left behind on your face due to sadness and regret for not expressing your romantic feelings for him.

your sobs begin to die down, wiping your tears with the sleeve of your — asahi's hoodie. the fabric soaks up all your sorrows, as you sniffle.

"i'm not sure how this'll end, but i just want you to know that i'm proud of you. whatever happens, please be happy. be happy for me, okay? i love you." your words cut off with a sob.

a loud beep causes your brain to go numb, the voices around you soon turning into white noise as the plane drops. your eyes glance over to the window, watching as you free fall. the beautiful greenery becomes your doom as the plane tumbles and turns.

you shut your eyes, leaning back against the headrest with asahi finding refuge in the back of your mind before everything just goes black.

★ treasure taglist. @ficscafe ... @kflixnet ... @yogurteume ... @tahyunwoo ... @h4chi ... @enhacolor ... @wonluvrbot ... @alohajun ... @youngminhee ... @setakdongies ... @ncizen ... @kyufilms ... @saeromiz ... @sunoo-bby ... @dancinginthetaillight ... @seung-scrittore ... @sseastar-main ... @changmin-wrlds ... @hanjisungpark ... @existnesia ... @ily-cuz-i ... @yedamology ... @i-luvsang ... @wyynn [click here to join!]

[ 🎧 ] jaydi's notes. there will be a pt. 2 to this! i hope u enjoy this, i was in my feels laurkey so saurry for the consistent angst LOL

© ACAIASAHI 2022 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. COPYING, TRANSLATING, AND REPOSTING IS PROHIBITED.

[kpop-kitkat]

Not Ready | Hamada Asahi

pairing | boyfriend! hamada asahi x pregnant!f reader

genre/cw | mention of sex, condom, anxiety attacks, angst, unwanted pregnancy, tears, hurt comfort, very sweet bf asahi, much fluff

wc | 1.9k

notes | none, except asahi is so sweet I can’t-

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

I sat on the sofa with my phone in hand, staring at my handsome boyfriend on the screen.

 "I miss you Jagi. Two more days until I get to see you," said Asahi through FaceTime. 

 "That's way too long," I sighed, pouting my lips and giving him puppy eyes.

 "Believe me Y/n, if it was my choice, I'd be cuddling you on that couch right now."

 "I know you would Sahi," I yawned, stretching my arms out.

 "Well, I don't want to keep you up. Get some sleep Jagi, I'll text you in the morning," he said with his beautiful smile that I am addicted to.

 "Night night," I waved, ending the call with a heavy heart. 

 I was about to set my phone down and go clean up the kitchen for the night, when a notification stopped me.

Health App

Your period was likely to start eight days ago. Have you started your period yet?

I clicked on the notification and noticed I was late. And I'm never late. But I considered the fact that I've been two weeks early before, so maybe it was just all over the place. I continued the clean up the kitchen and get a good eight hours of sleep. 

~~~~~

I arose with a sun ray shining in my eyes. I eagerly looked at my phone to see a text from "Jagi💕" .

Morning Beautiful

I smiled and texted back, "Morning Sahi." 

 I quickly got ready for the day, since the thought of Asahi returning the next day had me in a good mood.

I jammed out in the shower as usual, and was putting my makeup on when a notification gave me a jump scare. Of course I put my ringer all the way up.

Health App

Your period was likely to start nine days ago. Have you started your period yet?

This time, the notification gave me an unwanted anxiety attack. My heart rate picked up rapidly and I felt slightly dizzy. But I had to reassure myself it was fine. 

Today, I had made plans with friends, so I pushed my anxious thoughts away and enjoyed myself. 

~~~~~

Me and my friends Jisoo, Sana, and Yiren, all walked out of our favourite resturant with very full stomachs.

 "Thanks Sana," me, Jisoo, and Yiren said simultaneously, since Sana paid for the meal.

 "Of course! Anything for my besties," she giggled.

 We all sang Disney karaoke before stopping at me and Asahi's house. 

 "Thanks for the ride. Goodnight!" I waved as they drove away. 

Once in the house, I showered and got into bed, since it was already 10:45 p.m. and I was exhausted. I collapsed in bed and waited for sleep to overtake me, when anxiety returned. I tossed and turned, trying to win, but I failed. 

"It can't be, it can't be," I kept repeating to myself.

I sat up and rocked back and forth, tears threatening to fall. I decided I wasn't getting any sleep, even though I was tired, so I went to the bathroom and sat on the toilet with the lid down. I held my head in my hands and tried to get my mind off of the situation. I kept telling myself everything was alright, but my violently shaking body told me otherwise. I felt dizzy and hot, and decided I was going to suffer if I didn't confirm it. I was even afraid to think of the word, let alone say it out loud. 

That night. It was about thirty five days ago. I was terribly lovesick, and needy. So Asahi and I decided to have a fun night with protection. I vividly remember seeing him slip on the condom... I know my brain wasn't tricking me. I wasn't drunk for heaven's sake. 

I trembled as I reached into the bathroom vanity drawer. I pulled out a box which held a Clear Blue... pregnancy test. I read the instructions with hazy eyes, and followed them carefully. 

~~~~~

I set the test on the counter to let it calibrate. 

 "Why am I shaking? It's gonna be negative... It's gonna be negative..." I tried to reassure myself.

I clasped my hands together and prayed for a negative result.

Beep

This was it. The results could mean two different things. One, I was paranoid and anxious for nothing, or two, me and Asahi's lives have changed forever. I preferred the first one very much. I love kids, but me and Asahi haven't really discussed the idea of having children. I didn't want to give him such a responsibility. And I didn't know if he'd leave me because of it.

I took a deep breath before picking it up and examining the result.

Pregnant 3 Weeks

I dropped the test in disbelief and let the tears fall. It felt like my life was coming to an end. We're only twenty one...

~~~~~

I rubbed my red eyes as waited for Asahi to step in through the door. I had been so lonely. Normally, I would try to dress nicely for my boyfriend, but I didn't feel like making an effort, especially since my morning sickness began to kick in. So I wore a t-shirt and shorts, with no makep and messy hair, which Asahi claimed to love.

I heard keys being inserted into the door. My heart rate sped up immediately. I ran to the door and waited. Asahi then stepped in through. He gave me a warm smile before setting down the f/c rose bouquet he bought me and extended his arms towards me. I giggled excitedly before rushing towards him and jumping into his embrace, wrapping my legs around his waist. He stumbled back a bit, but was quick to regain his balance and hug me back. He then began kissing all around my face. 

"I missed you so much Jagi," he smiled, before kissing my lips sweetly.

I hung onto his neck and kissed him back, letting all of my worries melt away.

 "Never leave me again please," I mumbled, pulling away and jumping off of him to examine the bouquet. "These are beautiful Sahi," I mentioned. "Thank you."

He laughed before pecking my lips as he began to scroll through his phone. "All the guys are hanging at the studio, but I told them I wanted to spend tonight with you. Unless you'd rather be alone, I-

"No! I want to be with you," I responded quickly.

"Good," he sighed. "Well, I'm going to take a shower. I'll be down to cuddle and whatever with you," he assured, setting his phone down on the kitchen counter before ascending the stairs. 

As he left, I grabbed his phone. When the lock screen lit up, it was a picture of him and I on our first date. I smiled at it before using facial recognition to unlock it. Yes, we had each other's faces saved on our phones. As I looked through his texts, I saw the Treasure group chat. Asahi really did tell them, "Sorry, won't make it tonight. I need to spend time with Y/n. I've been away too long. I'll see you guys tomorrow", to which Junkyu replied "It's fine. Go spend some time with your future wife ;)". It made me feel a bit guilty, but Asahi wanted to spend time with me, so I brushed it off.

I set it down and yawned as I ran a hand through my hair. I then decided to put on a movie and make popcorn for the two of us. I even made the couch super cozy with way too many blankets and pillows. We could make a fort honestly. 

As I waited for my boyfriend, realization hit me like a brick. How was I going to tell him we were having a baby? And how would he react? He's an idol, and a busy one at that. Is this the best thing for us? We're not even engaged. 

Asahi then walked in, his hair messy and dripping wet, wearing a t-shirt and flannel pants. It baffles me how a mortal being could be so ethereal. He smirked at my blushing face, which I failed at hiding.

He then sat beside me and patted his lap, signaling for me to sit on it. I smiled before complying. I situated myself onto his lap and leaned into his chest, pulling a blanket over us. I also grabbed the remote control and pressed play on the K-Drama I had chosen.

We shared our warmth and our hearts began to beat in sync. Then, I heard him begin to hum the melody to his song, Darari. 

"It's much better when you sing," I suggested, eyes closed.

 "Darararararari, neol bogo isseum eumagi, Babe. Neoreul wihan mellodi mellodi, yeah. Nega myujeunikka jal deureobwa, play it. Darararararari, neol bogo isseum eumagi, Babe. Neoreul wihan mellodi mellodi, yeah. Nega myujeunikka jal deureobwa, play it," he sung with his angelic voice. It almost lulled me to sleep.

I came to a conclusion. I had to tell him now. It was better for the both of us. As I thought about how I was going to say it, he noticed my breathing become heavier.

"Are you nervous about something?" he asked, leaning his head on top of mine.

As much as I tried to stop it, tears began to silently make their way down my face. He heard my sniffle and turned my body around so he could see my face. He wiped my tears with his thumbs and gave me a sympathetic look. 

"Y/n, Jagi what's wrong?"

"I'm so sorry Asahi," I cried.

He gave me a confused look. "Sorry for what? I'm confused." 

"I'm pregnant," I said, wanting to get it over with. I was scared for what was to come, so I closed my eyes and tried to escape his hold. But I reopened them when Asahi didn't let me go. Instead, I saw a happy smile on his face.

"Why are you sorry about that?" he chuckled, eyes tearing up in happiness.

"You're not angry at me?" I asked.

"Of course not! I'm going to be a dad! You're not pranking me, are you?" 

I was shocked at his reaction, but I shook my head to answer his question.  

 "How could I be angry with you? If I was, it wouldn't make sense because I did this to you technically speaking," he laughed, bringing me some comedic relief.

 "I just thought, you know, you being a busy idol and all, you'd be overwhelmed and breakup with me," I admitted, looking down.

 "Hey," he tilted my chin up. "I love you, okay? And having a baby won't change that. I know it's a big responsibility for the both of us, but I'm willing to walk with you every step of the way. It's not going to be easy, but I believe we will get through it because we have love and trust. I will never leave you," he explained, causing me to tear up. "Let's go on this new journey together, alright?" he asked, connecting our foreheads.

"Alright," I laughed, trying to hold back the tears. "I love you so much Asahi. Thank you," I said, hugging him.

He hugged back immediately, then pulled away to bring me into a loving kiss. His hands made their way down to my stomach, where they began to rub circles.

 "I can't wait to meet them," he smiled into the kiss before pulling away and getting back into our cuddling position.

 "I l.o.v.e y.o.u."

[milkybonya]

♡ _ ʜᴏᴡ ᴄᴀɴ ɪ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛʙʀᴇᴀᴋ _ 아사히

order 048, anon: large matcha milk tea with fresh taro and fresh mango

#: idol!Asahi, idol!(gn)reader, ft. fanboy!Hyunsuk, some crack content, fluff, angst (angsty ending), kises, 1k+, kinda slow

note. this is so crap ugh i don't feel too great about this one.. anyways hi reader.. i hope you're taking care of yourself <3 i don't know if you need to hear this but you're allowed to be sad, to be happy, and to feel ♡ i love u endlessly

after filming for a new episode of 'double collaboration' ends, you stumble back into your waiting room, wondering what you'll do. it has already been hard participating on this competitive show alone without your group members, but on top of that: now you have to prepare a performance with treasure's Asahi under the category of 'heartbreak?'

sure, being an idol involves always meeting new people, but you've never worked so closely and intimimately on music with anyone other than your members before.

as you're trying your best not to let these thoughts get to you, you hear a gentle knock on your waiting room door. you rush to open it and find a shy Asahi in the doorway, wringing his hands together, smiling slightly and avoiding your eyes. he still has his mic and makeup on, showing he rushed straight here after the filming ended.

"hello y/n! i don't want to bother you, but i was wondering if we could exchange phone numbers so we could set up a time to work on our duet together?" he asks.

his cat fangs show when he smiles and it makes his smile even more contagious. you take his phone from him with a slight grin as you type in your number.

"are you free thursday?" you ask him, and he nods, saying he can definitely free up time that day.

"great! contact me and we'll find a time for that day," you say.

Asahi nods and bows with a smile, quickly exiting so he won't disturb you.

--

Asahi (treasure): hello y/n, this is Asahi

Asahi (treasure): would you be okay to meet thursday at 10pm or is that too late?

you: hello! no, i prefer meeting later :)

Asahi (treasure): okay ! should we meet at one of our company buildings?

you: can i come to yg O.O i've always wanted to see it

you: and that famous convenience store inside

Asahi (treasure): of course! come at 10pm on thursday then :)

--

on thursday, your manager's car enters the yg parking lot. fans from yg café across the street crowd around, trying to get a better look at who may be inside, but your manager speedily drives to the door that opens for the car, leading you to the underground parking.

"usually the idols exit the car and enter via the main doors so they can say hello to fans, but since no one knows yet about your and Asahi's collaboration, we can't let them know you're here," your manager explains. you nod along.

you: i'm here! just parking the car~

Asahi (treasure): you're driving ?!

you: hehehe no!! my manager is~

you: he's parking the car

Asahi (treasure): ohh okay! i'll wait by the main floor elevators :-)

you put your phone away and exit the car, waiting for your manager to do the same before you walk towards the elevators and head to the main floor. there, Asahi stands right in front of the doors as they open, as promised. he greets you with a smile and wide eyes, bowing deeply while he shakes both your hand and your manager's hand.

Asahi turns to your manager and says, "y/n and i will probably be in my studio upstairs, so you can relax with my manager if that's what you prefer."

your manager is grateful for the break and agrees. once he's gone, Asahi turns to you with a smirk.

"let's go clear out the convenience store!" he declares, guiding you towards it.

inside, you find a seemingly infinite number of snacks, ramen, sweets, drinks, and everything else. while you take your time looking, Asahi quickly takes the things he wants and leaves them on the self-checkout counter.

once your done, you join him and start rummaging in your bag for your wallet.

"firstly, why did you take so little? go grab more! secondly, which guest dares to pay for their own food in the yg convenience store?! thirdly, i have Hyunsuk hyung's card. it's on me... or on him, should i say," Asahi says.

you laugh, shaking your head at the troublemaker but comply, grabbing a few extra things and watching as Asahi pays with Hyunsuk's card.

"and why do you have Hyunsuk's card?" you ask Asahi as you both leave the convenience store.

"he lost a bet to me and i get to keep it for a week," Asahi explains, moving his head from side to side to make you laugh.

suddenly, his phone starts ringing as you're on the escalator up to where his studio is. he softly ask if you can hold the convenience store bag for a second as he takes the call.

"ah, it's Hyunsuk hyung," he sighs, "yes hyung, you're on speaker."

"Sahi i know i lost a bet, but $57 dollars spent all in one sitting just at the convenience store?! are you good--wait. i'm on speaker? who's there?!" Hyunsuk rambles.

"i'm here with... is it okay if i tell him?" Asahi softly asks you. you nod and he continues, "i'm here with y/n from DIAMOND for our collaboration next week. i treated them to some stuff from the convenience store."

"wait, wait, wait. y-y/n? from DIAMOND? wait... you're at yg right now, right? are you in your studio?" Hyunsuk asks.

"yeah, we're heading there--"

"i'll be there! i'll be there! y/n, i'm such a fan, please spend as much on my card as you want!!" Hyunsuk says before hanging up.

you laugh at the sudden confession and Asahi shakes his head.

"i forgot to tell you, he's a huge fan. he respects your work a lot," Asahi explains.

you nod and look around in awe as the two of you leave the escalator, walking down a hallway to get to the studio. it's strange to believe you're im the yg building, and that a member of treasure, a group you love, harbours so much respect for you.

in the distance, you can see Hyunsuk standing in front of Asahi's studio door, bouncing up and down with albums in his hand, waiting to be signed. once he spots the two of you, his face breaks into a huge smile and he sprints over, stopping every few steps to bow.

"oh my gosh oh my gosh.. y-y/n... sunbaenim it's... an honour to meet you! may i shake your hand? wow oh my gosh."

you extend out your hand to him and giggle as he pulls away, holding his hand that touched you tightly against his chest, as if protecting it from the world.

Asahi rolls his eyes from the side, starting to feel annoyed for some reason.

"i-if you have time and if it won't be a bother, could you please sign these? it'll mean the world to me," Hyunsuk breathes out.

"of course!"

"let's go to the studio; you can do it more comfortably there," Asahi suggests, and the three of you start walking.

you end up in front with Asahi and Hyunsuk whispering behind you.

"why didn't you tell me you're collaborating with y/n?!" Hyunsuk asks Asahi.

"uhhh... surprise?"

"you idiot!" Hyunsuk jokes, lightly patting Asahi's head.

Asahi dramatically wails and you turn around, seeing Asahi pretend to be in pain while Hyunsuk shakes his head.

"don't befriend Hyunsuk, y/n. he's a bad guy," Asahi jokes.

"don't say that about your leader!" you say.

Asahi feels hurt that you're defending Hyunsuk instead of him.

in the studio, you sign Hyunsuk's albums for him and muster up the courage to also ask for Hyunsuk's signature.

"just.. my signature? do you want me to ask the rest of the members? i'll call them one by one--" Hyunsuk starts.

"no, no! it's okay, really!"

"wow, y/n. you don't want mine?" Asahi points on.

you choke on your words before Asahi tells you he's joking.

Hyunsuk signs in a corner of the album and Asahi does the same, each writing their own message down for you. then, Hyunsuk calls the members one by one to come provide their signature.

"hyung, can we do this later? we have a lot of work to do," Asahi explains.

"oh, come on! don't rush y/n into the work. Jeongwoo's in the shower so he'll come a bit later, but they'll all be on their way. i should leave now, though.. ah, y/n sunbaenim, can we take a photo?"

you agree and pose with Hyunsuk, then both Hyunsuk and Asahi.

"okay, go now hyung! we have work to do," Asahi tells Hyunsuk, who bows deeply before leaving.

"ugh, finally. just the two of us," Asahi says, but throughout your time in the studio, the treasure members all drop by one by one to greet you and sign the album. receiving their good energy cheers you up, and you're grateful for both Asahi and Hyunsuk for inviting the other members to sign the album.

you spend the most of the night brainstorming with Asahi.

"i feel like it shouldn't be a treasure or DIAMOND song, but something else..." you suggest.

"do we want to focus on the bright or dark side of love?" Asahi asks.

"hmm.. can we depict both? maybe have a storyline that shows how love starts beautifully and then ends in heartbreak," you say.

Asahi nods, typing it into his computer.

"i really love akmu.. can we do a song of theirs?" you suddenly blurt out.

Asahi nods aggressively and you laugh.

"akmu are good... should we go with 'how can i love the heartbreak'?" he asks.

"it's a classic... but that's good, 'cause then we can add our own twist!"

"yeah!"

Asahi's hand meets yours in a high five, and you wonder if you've gone crazy or if that's electricity you felt just then.

the two if you continue working on a concept and sound, assigning parts and suggesting vague ideas for how you want the stage to look.

"do you want a coffee? yg coffee is pretty good!" Asahi asks.

he somehow still looks handsome even with the dark circles forming around his eyes, his hair messy from his fingers running through it and the way he's slouching in his seat.

"guess i can't pass up on it!" you say.

he nods and gets up, asking if you'd rather stay or go with him.

"i'll come with you and stretch my legs."

"oh... wait. actually. wanna take a break and play table tennis?" Asahi suggests.

"hey now. are you just flexing the fact that yg has a table tennis room?"

Asahi dies of laughter.

"no, i swear!" Asahi chokes out.

he takes you to make a coffee for you first, and for a second you let your mind wander, imagining he's the handsome barista who's making you your drink. his smooth arms show his veins at the back of his hands as he pours ice into a cup, and you wonder how someone could have been crafted so perfectly.

"stop watching me, y/n, i'm shy," Asahi says, jokingly turning his back to you.

"Sahi, can i call you that? you're just so pretty," you confess.

Sahi is left flustered, his face turning red as he giggles to himself.

"that's high praise coming from a monarch like you, y/n," he says.

he hands you a coffee, taking one for himself. it tastes delicious and you thank Sahi for it.

"now... let's go drain this buzz on table tennis!" he declares, gently taking your hand and runnning off with you to the table tennis room.

Asahi is usually shy and reserved. but somehow around you, even though you've only just met, he wants to talk and take your hand and spend time with you. he wants you all to himself.

he also doesn't hold back in table tennis as he manages to win in every round you play. but each time you frown, he runs over and gently uses his fingers to stretch your mouth into a smile.

"even if you lose, y/n, don't ever frown," he says.

back in the studio, the two of you continue developing your ideas until the sun rises and you fall asleep with your head on Asahi's shoulder. he doesn't move an inch, not wanting to wake you. instead, he continues quietly working on music until you wake up.

somehow, under the light of the monitor, you still look so pretty. he feels his heartbeat falter and he realizes he's in trouble as he watches his hand reach out to move a strand of hair out of your face.

-

"i give up, i can't do this," Asahi huffs, crumpling to the floor.

the two of you have finishing writing and recording the song. now, all that's left is the performance and choreography. Asahi and a few of the treasure members came to your company building to help work on it

"get up!" you demand, offering Asahi a hand. he takes it but pulls you down to the floor with him, catching you so you won't hurt yourself and laughing as you glare at him.

"i didn't come all the way here to watch grown people flirt" Jihoon huffs, crossing his arms.

"ah, let them be. plus, that's DIAMOND's y/n you're talking about... watch what you say," Hyunsuk says, defending you.

"c'mon kids! let's try that from the top," Jihoon says.

Hyunsuk and Jihoon watch as you and Asahi attempt the performance. there's a part where Asahi takes hold of your hands and you look into each other's eyes. practicing that makes you both flustered, but you strangely look up to it each time.

there are also parts where you're on stage and Asahi isn't a d vice versa, and during the moments when you watch Asahi from the sidelines, you constantly fall for him and his talent. he looks so pretty even when practicing, and you can't help but fall for him.

on a break, Hyunsuk and Jihoon leave to go back to the yg building due to some schedules. you and Asahi remain in your practice room, eating takeout on the ground.

"Sahi, i still feel like i'm not good enough for all this sometimes, you know? like do you ever feel like someone else should've debuted instead of you?" you suddenly tell Asahi, who stops chewing and nods.

"yeah, you're not alone for thinking that. but no one else should've debuted as y/n of DIAMOND but you. of course, everyone deserves to debut. but no one could've done this the way you do, no matter what you think."

the sparkle in Asahi's eyes as he speaks to you makes your heart rate speed up, and suddenly you want to kiss him. when you ask him if you can, he nods while in a daze.

you lean into him and it feels so right to be close to him like this as he wraps an arm around your shoulders, bringing you closer. his lips are soft and smooth, and you pull away to see his cheeks painted red.

"Sahi, i think i've fallen for you," you shyly confess.

"you think?!" he jokes before saying, "i've fallen for you, too."

you let yourself lay on his chest as he lays on his back on the floor, and you close your eyes.

-

none of this lasts long, though.

the whole world finds out about you and Asahi in an instant, all because of some stupid accident.

the two of you go on a late night walk to clear your heads and warm up for practicing the performance. Asahi works up the courage to slide his arm around your waist and pull you close as you mention to him that it's chilly, but right in that crucial moment, someone recognizes you and Asahi.

the instant is captured on camera and posted onto the internet within a matter of seconds, and netizens go wild with all sorts of claims.

both of your companies decide it would be in your best interests to publicly explain that what you had prior to the incident is no longer, and that you would be breaking up. however, your duet performance would continue and would be your last 'hurrah' with Asahi.

it's heartbreaking, but you find it in you to feel grateful for the chance to still perform with Asahi.

he calls you that night, after your companies have made their decisions.

"y/n, are you okay?" his soft voice reaches you through the speaker.

"no, but... well, are you?"

"no..."

"i thought so, Sahi. but it's okay. let's make the most of this last performance," you say with a tearful smile.

"yes, y/n, let's."

"i don't think you should call me anymore... Asahi. just so we can get over each other with a bit more ease."

his heart breaks hearing you call him Asahi instead of Sahi, but he agrees. you're right--it's no use dragging this on any longer.

-

on the day of filming, you find yourself feeling nervous. not only do you want to do a good job, but seeing Asahi after a week of not seeing him is surreal. before being forced to break up, the two of you would meet everyday, using 'practice' as an excuse.

you're snapped out of your thoughts when a producer tells you it's time for you to go on stage.

Asahi meets you halfway in the hallway and takes hold of your hand, squeezing it.

"let's have fun one last time, y/n," he says, and you nod firmly in response.

performing 'how can i love the heartbreak, you're the one i love' after parting ways with Asahi makes it seem even more real. your eyes fill with tears as you sing and you even find yourself actually crying at some point. Asahi brushes his thumbs across your cheeks to bid the tears away when this happens, even though it was totally unplanned.

still, the performance finishes successfully, and you both end the stage with a bow.

all the participants are called up for the results to be announced, and you nervously stand beside Asahi, awaiting the announcement. you honestly don't care about winning at this point, but just don't want to leave your spot next to Asahi.

"the winner for this week is.... the Hui and Somin duo ! congratulations!" the judge calls out.

not hearing your names manages to make your stomach drop, but you still clap and congratulate the winner.

"even if you lose, y/n, don't ever frown," you remember Asahi saying.

so, despite having lost your duet performance, you stand there and grin like a fool. who knows when you'll see Asahi like this again. at least you go out of it smiling :)

[goddamnosamu]

[12:49am]

Writing songs is not easy

Pairing: idol!asahi x reader

Words: 1.9k+

a/n: i suggest reading this fic with any sad song you know for extra emotional damage. THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE so i hope you enjoy this fic that destroyed me. This is the official opening?? or start of my page and i decided with sharing angst YEY! stay tuned for more fics and i will create my carrd asap so you would know more about what im about to do with my acc here in tumblr so enjoy this fic for now! feedback would be very much appreciated :DD

Writing was hard — something asahi was very familiar with. The constant wracking of his brain to write lyrics that people would love. Working at ungodly hours to write 3 lines of lyrics that were all over the place which, most of the time, ended up with multiple pieces of crumpled paper, or even ended up sleeping on his desk with multiple scribbles on different sheets of paper. Despite the numerous love songs under his belt as a producer, asahi never really understood the concept of love. He felt like he was missing a specific emotion or feeling to add more essence to the songs.

Until he met you.

With you, writing came so much easier. It was easier to put his feelings into his writings — expressing the love he wished to express towards you. You knew this, of course. The subtle eye contact, soft whines of protest, and the delicate touches he leaves on your skin. You knew he was trying on his own ways, and you absolutely adored his ways of showing love to you.

But it was never easy.

It may seem like a walk in the park for others, or even romanticizing these subtle acts of expressing love. But loving another person was never easy, especially if expressing it was not their forte. He always wished to meet someone where he may be able to express himself without having to worry about his frustrating hesitance toward love. Though he may be infatuated with different people from his whole lifetime, or even have friends that he knows would stick by him, he never really tried to meet his person because of the fear that they might grow tired of his antics. He just convinced himself, basically. Platonic may be the only thing that he could have, and he’d have to rely on cheesy romance films or anime for him to know how a relationship happens.

“You think a relationship is hard?” he got asked by one of the members when they were trying to write lyrics for their upcoming album. He didn’t have an answer back then. Every bit of knowledge he had with relationships came from films, never really having the experience because of the hectic idol life he has now. He was contented, to an extent. But he remembered how much he smiles whenever he’s with you. How he finally experienced what it's like for his day to seemingly be better just by thinking about you. How he blushes when a member brings you up. How he unconsciously brings you to whatever conversation he was having; always wanting to connect his story about you. How he really tried his best to keep the relationship despite all the shame, hate, doubt, and every negative feeling there is.

He could never forget how hard he tried to get you to be his in the first place. A simple flower with a note: I wish to see you smile like that every day because you shine the brightest in my eyes. I hope you will allow me to be with you more, just like the orange sun. Having to find the right timing with you, to make sure you were comfortable and in a great mood. Constantly thinking about what happens then if you said yes, then worrying too much if ever you said no.

He felt like the happiest man alive when you said yes. Though he doesn’t really know what’s the next step in a relationship, he chooses to revel in the feeling of love? no, that’s not it. He doesn’t really know if it was the love he was feeling. But he didn’t mind it. He’s got you, he thinks. He’ll soon figure out his feelings for you eventually, he hopes. So, there were days that were long, days where he wanted to stay in it forever, and days that will hold a special place in his heart.

He remembers the way you hold his figure whenever he gets stressed about his work. The sweet nothings he hears while he lays his head on your figure as if melting in your embrace. It was the most comforting thing. Being with you erases the negative thoughts he has throughout the day. He hides his emotions, as he usually does. He doesn’t really know what to do with it, and he sometimes wished someone would instantly know how he was feeling whenever it started to get tough. But you always seemed to know his emotions. You were reading him like an open book, yet other people struggle with the simplest emotions he feels. Even his members sometimes didn’t understand his emotions. You were always there when you needed him.

He was the happiest. He always had the motivation to write songs because he finally found his inspiration. He finally found someone he could confine himself to without worrying about forcing himself. He knows you were there, you always were, in whatever situation there was.

But, he wasn’t there for you.

He didn’t know what to do on your off-days. He didn’t know what makes you happy. You’re holding him, but he isn’t holding you – That was the hardest part of your relationship. He was content with your treatment, but he doesn’t reciprocate it back to you. Yet, you kept quiet. Despite all the constant neglect, late-night calls that leave you unsatisfied, tears in the other room while he’s busy being happy. Even the I love you’s that holds the deepest meaning in your relationship felt empty. Even the way he says it was empty. It honestly felt like a slap in the face, when you realize your relationship is different now. 

He couldn't understand it at first, the sudden change in your relationship. He was doing fine, you’re doing fine, he thinks. He might just be overthinking things again, just like what he used to do before he got into a relationship with you. You were always there for him whenever he had his off-days. Ever since he saw you with a frown on your face every time you were there to comfort him against his own demons, he swore to himself that he’d try a bit harder to remove those thoughts so you wouldn’t have to worry again. Plus, it’s a way for him to see you with a smile on your face, just like how he wanted to see you. 

But one thing led to another, and you both were at your tipping point with each other. The moment you walked out of his life was the moment he never wanted to relive ever again. The eerily silence in the room when you asked him for a talk. The monotonous voice that held much more weight every time he remembered your words to him. He notices the slight tremble in your voice as the words you were releasing start to frustrate you. The amount of emotion in your voice when you told him you were tired snapped him back to reality. He didn’t know what to say. What else could he tell you that could at least help calm you down? The only indicator he had of time was the sun setting on the window of his studio.

“What am I in your life, asahi?” you asked, with so much exhaustion and desperation in your voice. You wanted to know what you were in his life.

“You’re my girlfriend, obviously!” he said with frustration that almost seemed like he wanted to get away from the situation and just wanted to lie in your arms — forgetting the whole thing ever happened.

“Well, it doesn’t seem like it anymore.” You exclaimed. You were tired of all of it. As you were still telling him about all the frustrations in the relationship. Asahi was constantly telling himself that everything was going to be okay. He wanted to tell you that, but he felt like he was convincing himself more than you that the relationship was okay, even if it was in its final steps.

You couldn’t even look at him anymore, at that point. Too tired about the whole ordeal, you broke it off. As much as he hated the whole situation and himself, he couldn’t help but stare at the setting shining sun that always reminded him of you. He knew he tried, but he wished he could’ve tried harder for you.

The wave of emotion hit him, finally coming back to his senses and realizing that you were actually gone. He couldn’t even stare at his desk because it was full of trinkets that came from you. A drawing of you was also on his wall, almost taunting him about the way he handled the relationship. A picture frame then came into view — it was a photo booth print you both went to on his birthday. Both of you were smiling so wide for the camera as if nothing was wrong with the relationship. He smiled a bit, remembering how thankful he was that you went out of your schedule just to be with him the entire day.

A snap from his member brought him back to reality. Repeating the question to him again, and waiting for his answer. “No one writes songs about the ones that come easy.” Asahi said, a bit of falter in his tone as if on the verge of breaking down the more he thinks about it. He doesn’t know how long he was keeping it together until he heard a soft click of the door and his member not in the room with him – assuming he left to leave him alone with his thoughts. To help relieve the pain for a bit, asahi went back to writing music but without the lyrics. He felt like he just needed to get lost in his own little world without any thoughts bothering him.

He doesn’t really know what time it is, but he assumes that he stayed up again in the studio for another time. But he did get a good beat out of it. Immediately opening his phone and quickly going to your contact to tell you about his beat, he instantly had a frown on his face.

09:27 pm   will you come home for the night?

10:56 pm   asahi?

12:17 am   well, good luck in the studio for today!!

12:18 am   i love you!!! <3 <3 <3                                                                                                                                                                                                    seen

It was the last text he got from you before you broke up with him. He hadn’t realized that he left you on read that time, he couldn’t even remember what he was doing that day for him to forget to reply to you. And just like that, he realized that when was the last time he replied instantly just like you did for him? When was the last time that he did something great for you? When was the last time that he even had to comfort you, despite him hearing you complain about your workspace and difficulties in life? Every single insecurity and guilt came crashing back down to him, the guilt eating him up that he felt like he couldn’t even breathe properly. He knew what to do – at least he convinced himself he knew what to do in a relationship. He just didn’t know how to express it. His harsh breathing racked his body while he tried to calm his mind from the frustration, trying to stop his thoughts from consuming his already tired night at the studio.. He’s done it multiple times ever since you left. But just for tonight, he allows himself to fully come to terms with his feelings and it was evident from the way he sobbed that night, scribbles of words and phrases he wished to tell you all forgotten.

Writing was easy for him, yes. But writing about love will never be the same because he knows what love is now – it was everything he never was.

[blossominghunnie]

Treasure

☀️ Imagine 🌙 Fanfic

🌼 Fluff 🥀 Angst 🌷 Comedy 🍄 Suggestive 🧚🏼‍♀️ Popular ☠️ Horror/Suspense 🪼 Requests

Choi Hyunsuk

Coming soon

Park Jihoon

Goodbye kiss ☀️🌼🪼🧚🏼‍♀️

Talk fast ☀️🌼 (soon)

Yoshi/ Kanemoto Yoshinori

Coming soon

Kim Junkyu

Coming soon

Yoon Jaehyuk

Coming soon

Hamada Asahi

Zombie Apocalypse ☀️🥀☠️

Kim Doyoung

Coming soon

Watanabe Haruto

Coming soon

Park Jeongwoo

Coming soon

So Junghwan

Coming soon

Taglist:

[xonepeacelovex]

the playlist

Characters: Asahi Hamada (Treasure) x Y/N (Reader)

Genre: Strangers AU | Narration + SocMed (to be updated)

Trigger/Content Warning: None

Word count: 2.5k

Summary:

"So this is where we end?”

“This is where we end.”

Inspiration: Begin Again | Movie

A/N: I’d really appreciate if you’ll take time to listen to the songs. Thank you. Happy reading. :))

Asahi’s POV

He’s an artist for god’s sake. A goddamn artist who doesn’t have a place on this world apparently. Asahi was sitting down on one of the benches in the park. Mad at his employers. Mad at the world. Mad for himself. Mad at himself. He can’t even let go of his ego for once. Now he is jobless like what everybody thinks of someone like himself. With a bag and the camera he always carries, he decided he needed something to calm him down. It looks like it’s a bout to rain also. Does the bars around in this city sell alcohol in the middle of a day, he wondered.

The place was full packed, surprisingly for a bar located in a secluded area. But the rain was already pouring hard so he had no choice but to enter and find his place inside it.

“Can I have a glass of beer?” The bartender nodded at him while he patiently waited for it.

The faint sound of guitar strumming caught his attention, bringing his eyes on the small stage set up on the corner of the bar. His eyes landed on you, a single lighting on you giving him a chance to see you even from the back of the bar where he is.

“Here is your beer,” the bartender announced. He thanked him and paid already for the beer. He downed it in one go before going somewhere where he can see you better. He doesn’t mind standing for a few minutes. He just had to see you.

The people around doesn’t pay any attention to you, busy on their own business to even notice how captivating your voice is or how the lyrics to the song you are singing is absolutely heartbreaking. He can’t help but to stare at you, you obviously know no one is listening to you but you kept on singing anyway. He took out his camera, immediately pointing it towards you. Everything is perfect on his viewfinder. He looked at you once more before clicking the shutter.

“It’s a song I’ve written… Thank you,” you awkwardly said before going down the platform. A smile made its way to his lips. You are also an artist, a goddamn good one. Someone at the side of the stage clapped loudly first then few people followed him. He gives you a hug before getting on the stage himself.

“That’s my friend right there. I’ll surely miss you, Y/N,” he said in the mic, looking at you, giving you once more a round of applause before he performs. You wave at your friend with a smile before you get your things on one of the seats. Y/N’s POV Thankfully, the rain stopped pouring but the pavement are still wet. You carefully walk while you are going through the playlist on your phone, “Wait,” a voice called out. Finding the song you’ve been looking for, you put your earphones, not knowing someone calling out for you.

Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/6jGnykaS6TkWp15utXSAeI?si=0370c6a1fc074838

You started humming, looking at your wrist watch.

“Wait!” A voice called out again, louder this time.

You are about to looked back when someone popped out beside you making you stopped walking. Flustered, you looked at the man in front of you.

Is he a threat? Drunk? Does he need help?

You pulled your earphones out and waited for the man to talk again. “I’m sorry but you didn’t say the title of your song.” Someone listened to you?, you smile at the thought, “It doesn’t have a title.”

“Ohhh…”

He avoided your eye contact. You can see how he was struggling to continue or to end the conversation. You laugh when he made an innocent reaction. He looked at you when he heard you laughing at him, “Oh no. I’m not laughing at you. I’m just surprised someone actually listened to me singing and not getting their ass drunk in the middle of a day. Though they can absolutely do that. Not that I’m judging them. Wait. I’m rambling nonsense already.”

You paused before sighing because of how embarrassed you are. Heart pounding, wishing that the man in front of you doesn’t think you are weird. “I’m not weird,” you blurted out making things more worse.

He gave you a smile, like reassuring you he doesn’t think of you like that, “I’m not weird either.” “Good.” “Great.” You both nodded at each other.

“Can I ask is there a way I can listen to it?” Is there a way he can listen to it? You thought for a second before nodding at him. “Cool. Is it on Soundcloud or Spotify?”

The first person to ask you about your song. Maybe it’s not a bad idea to tag him along on your little adventure. Either if he is a good guy or a bad guy, you’ll be safe anyway.

“No.” His excitement died down when you answered him. “But I can give you a copy of it. Not for free though.” He immediately search his bag for his wallet when you stopped him, holding his wrist. “Not that kind of payment. What do you think about going on a little adventure?” You waited for him to think about it. “Well not really an adventure. Just walking around this city. You know, trying food, going to famous tourist spots and whatnot.” Sighing, “So?”

“For the copy of your song?” he paused, before a smile broke into his lips, “I’m in.” “I’m Asa-“ handing his hand out for a shake when you stopped him, “Can we not give each other’s name?” you asked him. A strange request he thought but he agreed with you anyway.

You walked silently, waiting him to follow your cue, he followed you shortly after.

“Do you have your earphones with you?” He pulled out a headphone out from his bag. You nodded, searching the audio splitter on your bag too. Silently putting his headphone and your earphone on the audio splitter before inserting it on your phone. You waited for him to put his headphone before pressing the song play.

Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/6LLUiWmVoiPm27QNzBNc3j?si=07f9353c83934e64

He smiles before removing one of the headphone in his ear, “Begin Again?”. You did the same with your earphones before nodding at him. “That explains the audio splitter,” he said.

“You can tell a lot about a person by what’s on their playlist,” you recited your favorite quotes from the movie. “Let’s know each other by our song choices. What do you think?”

“I’m afraid cause you’re a singer.” “Don’t because I’m not a singer. I just sing.”

Asahi’s POV And you sing beautifully, he wanted to add.

You’ll know someone based on the songs they listened to but for him, the film someone loves can tell you their struggles in life. He thought if you also relate to the characters in the movie Begin Again. Are you also someone who is going through a break-up? Or someone who lost their job like him?

Sharing his playlist to someone is something he doesn’t think he’ll do but he found himself thinking about the songs he wanted to share with you.

Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/05wIrZSwuaVWhcv5FfqeH0?si=2c9d90b675b74f24

Y/N’s POV

“Really?” you said to him when you heard the familiar drumbeat while he handed you back your phone. You pointed with your whole hand the sidewalk you both were walking in, it’s still wet then the sky that is still cloudy. But none of that matter to him as he can’t help but move his shoulders to the beat of the drums.

You closed your eyes with your hand when he started dancing in the middle of the street. You looked at him again this time moving your hand in your open mouth, surprised that other people are watching you two now.

“C’mon,” he said making you looked back at him, he has this cheeky smile. You swayed lightly, giving in. The people passing by giving you weird looks now. You stopped and watched him for a second before you hold his wrist and pulling him towards an ice cream parlor. Saving both of you from further embarrassment. You two are not weird. Both of you are crazy for dancing in the middle of a sidewalk.

The empty ice cream parlor was filled with the sound of laughter.

“I can’t believe I did that,” you admitted to him, “But really ‘Walking on Sunshine’? I saw you downing a glass of beer on one shot earlier.”

Is it okay to ask him? But you didn’t ask him directly.

He smiles, “I just wanted to know if you’ll also join me in my craziness.”

“I got you,” assuring him, “What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?”

“Grapes.”

“I’m sorry. What again?” “Grapes.” You expected rocky road or maybe even mint chocolate but not grapes. Luckily, this ice cream parlor had every flavor. You simply got a cookies and cream flavor. You handed him the cup of his ice cream.

He just continues to surprise you the more you spend your time with him.

“It’s my turn now right?” grinning at him. Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/2LMkwUfqC6S6s6qDVlEuzV?si=ea6112d184e34e59

“Are you okay?” He stopped eating his ice cream putting the whole cup on the table, looking at you with knitted eyebrows. Chuckling at him, before doing the same, “I-“ Is there an easy way to say what you are about to say? “It’s too late for me,” you smiled at him before looking down at your melting ice cream cup. Your smile fading away the more you talk, “He love someone else now. Maybe in another universe, we’ll have our happy ending.”

You waited for his response and when did not utter a single word, “And that’s White Ferrari for you,” you joked at him making him laugh. “Your turn.” Asahi’s POV Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/5cii8kYu4Ti6UigNiRCpCw?si=4b5092c81de04f66

“Jonathan Larson?” you excitedly asked him while he open the door for you while exiting the ice cream parlor. “How can you know it’s time to let go?”

“Of your dreams?” He nodded. “You need to decide. Are you letting yourself be led by fear or by love?” You recited one of his favorite lines in the movie trailer of tick, tick… BOOM!.

“Fear. Absolutely fear,” he answered like how the main character answered it. You laugh at him, “Kidding aside, I got fired. Because it is not only my dreams I can’t let go but also my pride in my works. They just… don’t see my vision,” he ranted at you, aware that you are listening to him attentively.

“Am I killing the mood?” “I saw you taking my picture earlier with a film camera.” “Oh... I’m sorry.” “Don’t be sorry. I know you have a great vision,” you said with a straight face that he got flustered. Asahi doesn’t know if you are joking or not. “I’m joking.” What you said got his heart beating faster, he’s sure all the blood rushed to his face now. He can feel his cheeks are getting hotter including his ears. “I just wanted to ask for a copy of it but I know it’ll take a long time to process the film.” “I’ll give you a copy.” “Really?” “You are giving me a copy of your song so it’s only fair.” You grin from ear to ear, “How about take pictures of our little adventure? If I have new songs, I’ll make sure you’ll hear it,” You suggested, giving him another deal he cannot refuse. “I’m in.”

Y/N’s POV Satisfied with his answer, you excitedly searched for the song you wanted him to hear, putting it on queue.

Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/6uubvaXbqj0do75wZFrecY?si=8937167491bb416a

“This is gonna be our little secret,” you whispered to him. You wanted him to listen to this song, know that there’s no need to rush. There’s no need to let go. We’ll be lost but we’ll also be found.

“Give me your camera,” without hesitation he gave you his camera, you pushed him gently in front of you, “I’ll take a picture of you.” He stopped and looked at you, “This feels awkward. I’m always behind the camera.” While you back away from him, making sure to get the picturesque background. “You look fine. Just pose,” looking at him at the viewfinder. More than fine if you’ll be honest to yourself. You enjoyed taking his pictures and you know he’s also taking pictures of you. You believe most of them are candid because he never asked you to pose or to stand in front of something unlike what you did with him. You wondered how the pictures would turn out.

Asahi’s POV He looked up at the sky, some stars are now visible. The sky is clear now unlike the weather earlier that day. As the day turned into night, Asahi felt that the time is running out. Movies and songs are not enough to know you. He can’t do anything because he agreed with you earlier, no asking of personal details. “Hey. Is ramen okay with you?” you asked him exiting the ramen restaurant in the alley. Asahi nodded, he got hungry when you both smelled the ramen upon passing the alley. “Come inside,” pulling him.

“It’s your turn now,” giving him your phone. Instead of what song he wanted to share with you, he picked the song that conveyed what he’s feeling right now, adding it to the queue.

Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/6bFsQ6yOp3z5mGNkhWP0P1?si=a4da3bd3bd8e4308

You smile to yourself and began to ask him what he wants, ordering it including for yours. You did not say anything this time. Just looking outside the glass window of the ramen restaurant. Entertaining yourself with the cat passing by, he searched for his camera immediately. Asahi just need to capture the serene moment. When you heard the click of his camera, you turned your back and watched him with his camera before you smiled at directly at camera. The first time you looked at him, taking a picture of you. “At least I have one picture, looking at the camera.” He got embarrassed that you knew he’s only taking candid photos of you. Thankfully, the ramen arrived saving him from answering you.

“Thank you for the food,” you said and he copied you. Now playing: https://open.spotify.com/track/3Un9IKqqC6LEqjwKsFWrqx?si=f7161f6556834970

When Asahi heard the song, he knew you answered him already so he did what he just can. He’s making the left time worth every second as you also did. Telling each stories, sharing interests, doing some hidden talents, anything that would make the day worth it until it’s time to say goodbye. Y/N’s POV In front of the closing ramen restaurant, you pulled out the cord of his headset on your audio splitter before you also wrapped your earphone to your phone, putting everything inside your bag. The stranger whom you’ve known for the day, had his camera and bag hanging on his shoulders. Both of you are looking at each other. Will you ever forget his face? You stared at him shamelessly this time, memorizing his face as you can.

“Before I even forgot,” you said, rummaging your bag for a cd that have your song on it, “This is what I promised.” Handing him the cd on a case that have nothing but a phrase you’ve written on it.

He’s an art only to touched with my eyes. He get it and read what you’ve written silently. He knows the cd is not really for him, looking back at you.

“So this is where we end?”

“This is where end.”

Copyright © 2022 xonepeacelovex All rights reserved.

[alohajun]

♡ I LOVE YOU, LITTLE ONE — HAMADA ASAHI

dad!asahi x reader | wc : 0.4k words | content : possible grammar and spelling mistakes, lowercase intended, fluffity fluffy fluffy

coming home after a tiring day of work was the happiest moment of your day — but coming home to your beloved husband and lovely child; there were no words that could describe the happiness you felt.

hamada asahi was the perfect husband. be it the fact he focused more on working at home so he could look after your child. or even how he encouraged you to return to work, letting you know he’d always be supportive of your choices.

you quietly entered the house, wondering what was occupying the father-child duo this time. upon arriving home a few days ago, you were welcomed with your husband dozed off on the play mat while your baby had a field day playing by themself. the picture you captured then was currently your wallpaper, bringing a smile to your face whenever you unlocked your phone.

what are they up to today?

hearing the familiar sound of asahi’s singing, you followed his voice, wondering if he was working on a new song. “whatever you want, whatever you need, i can even grab that star. whatever you want, whatever you need, i’ll always be by your side,” he sang, making you peek inside the room.

hamada asahi — treasure’s renowned producer, visual and lyricist — as well as a loving husband and father stood in the middle of the room, rocking your little bundle of joy in his arms softly as he sang, lulling the baby to sleep.

“i love you, little one,” he softly muttered, placing your child in their cot once they had fallen asleep. “forever and always.” his words were just above a whisper, almost as if it was a secret between him and your baby.

a warm smile adorned your face upon seeing the way asahi looked at your child. your heart beating crazily at the simple observation as his gaze gave away exactly how much your child meant to him. you knocked on the door, getting the attention of your husband, who seemed to be too occupied — even though he was merely watching your child with heart eyes.

asahi turned as he saw you standing in the doorway, smiling fondly in greeting. “you are home.” he watched as you had a giddy smile on your face, looking like you knew something he didn’t. “what’s with the face, love?”

“nothing … i just love you, hamada asahi.”

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TREASURE MASTERLIST

© 2022 ALOHAJUN | PLEASE REFRAIN FROM COPYING OR REPOSTING MY WORK WITHIN OR OUTSIDE THIS SITE

[jaesahiluvr]

photograph.

summary. — wherein your boyfriend asahi gave you a photo album consisting of pictures he took of you throughout the years.

genre. — fluff, and angst ( so sorry in advance )

a/n. — enjoy, love u.

“do you still remember the first day we saw each other?” asahi asks you out of the blue when you we’re both at a cafe in tokyo.

“omg yes! that was the most romantic thing that happened to me. i was casually standing on the other side of the train station and you were across also. i was really in a hurry that time you know because i wanted to make it in time for my favorite band’s concert. then i saw you, you looked exactly like my ideal man. leather shoes, brown trousers, long black coat, a leather bag that looks like my grandfather’s bag, your cute little glasses and your film camera.” you both giggled at the thought of asahi’s outfit.

“my film camera, right. the first time i took your picture. i wasn’t aiming for you, you know. i was just taking pictures of people in the station but you looked perfectly exactly to the camera and smiled. when i observed the photo, i saw your cute little smile and i looked immediately at you. and you were still smiling. not at the camera but me.”

he looked up at you again, both of you reminiscing that moment. you sat in silence for awhile, still thinking about the unforgettable memory that both happened to you. smiling at the thought of meeting the love of your life unexpectedly. it was like a flower finally blooming.

“love, y/n” asahi breaks the silence and grabbing something inside his leather bag. it was a photo album that says ‘throughout the years, my love’ “these are the photos i took of you throughout the years. most of them are you not looking at the camera, sometimes i take pictures of you without you looking so that i could compile all of it and put it in this little album photo. i hope you like it, love”

you we’re stunned. speechless. you didn’t expect anything like this from asahi though you knew he loves to take pictures but something like this just overwhelms and warms your heart. you’re so lucky to be loved by such a beautiful man. “oh my god, what? - love… i love this so much what!! since when did you make this? i never saw you do any of this wow! thank you love. i’m so out of words right now. i don’t know what to say…”

“you don’t have to say anything, love. the fact that you’re here right now with me, feeling happy as ever. i know how much you love me. and i love you as much as you’ll ever know. thank you for being with me.”

you we’re already in tears, you didn’t wanna cry but the heartwarming gift and words that asahi told you just makes you weak. and being vulnerable around him is not a bad thing, because it just shows how much you love and care for him.

you both just stared at eachother’s eyes and with such silence, everything and none was said. you both didn’t had to say anything because both of your eyes speaks. it tells everything, even the things that can’t be said out loud.

2 years later.

“happy 7th anniversary love. i miss you everyday. be happy in heaven, angel” you stand up and went inside your car, going back home and visited him everyday for until the very last breath you take.

[jenohi]

stranger

PAIRING ▸ Watanabe Haruto x fem!reader

GENRES ▸ pining, high school au, lacrosse au, I’m not really sure what genre this is lol

WARNINGS ▸ traumatic events?

SUMMARY ▸ When Haruto moves halfway around the world the last person he expects to see is you. His former nemesis...or so he thinks.

PLAYLIST ▸ Still Don’t Know My Name by Labyrinth

WORD COUNT ▸ 9626

UNIVERSE ▸ YG High; Treasure Lacrosse Team

A/N ▸ I’ve decided from here on out all my stories will probably fall within the same universe. I only really have like 4 universes in mind so I’ll label them just so you know. Also, I’m looking to add some art to my stories to bring them more to life but I am useless at graphics/edits, so! If you’re really into making graphics/edits and you enjoy my work please please PLEASE reach out to me!!! I would love to work with an amazing artist! <3 <3 Plz enjoy.

A/N 2 ▸ This story is like a lot of crossover with Jeongwoo’s story but I hope I was able to bring justice to Haruto’s character and bring his story to life. :P ok now enjoy for real realz.

You were the prettiest girl Haruto had ever known in his life. But to him, you were also his rival. You always managed to score just a few points higher than him on each exam, each quiz, each assignment. To him it always felt like the teachers liked you more, so he made sure your classmates liked him more. The thing that made him really mad was that you were so unbothered. You were ambivalent to him and you didn’t even know his name. If you really were strangers and never sat in the same class he could understand. But you had been in the same classes for years. Each time you spoke to him, you politely asked for his name. As if you were strangers.

When his parents told him that his family was going to move to another city, far enough that he would have to transfer schools, he had mixed feelings. This was his last chance to confront you. To understand why you’d never bothered to remember his name, but each time he approached you he found you furiously scribbling in a notebook. Although he resented you for not knowing his name, he could never get himself to disturb you when you looked so stressed scribbling whatever it was in your notebook.

What Haruto didn’t know is that you did notice him. You noticed the handsome, tall, skinny boy that was always in the corner of your line of sight. But you had no idea what to say to him. So you never approached him. He was a stranger.

Haruto wished he could forget you. He was a bit uncomfortable transferring to a new school at first but thankfully, three other boys had transferred with him. Asahi, Mashiho, and Yoshi had become literal brothers to him. The school also had a transfer students program and he made a new friend, Hanbyul. She was a chatterbox and sometimes she could literally chat his ear off, but she was also sweet and helpful. But she wasn’t you.

But that didn’t matter because Hanbyul had another guy on her mind all the time anyway. “You know we’ve just been friends for such a long time and lately, I’ve started to...I don’t know. I feel different. Nervous. Is it normal to feel nervous around your best friend?”

“I don’t know. Is it?” Haruto responded.

“No, I suppose it isn’t. But he probably doesn’t feel the same way. I doubt he’s ever even thought about me in that way.”

Haruto felt someone nudge him, he turned to see that it was Asahi. Haruto leaned over to hear what he was going to say. “Is she talking about Jaehyuk’s brother?”

Haruto nodded.

“Jaehyuk talks about his little brother and this chick all the time. She’s so off the mark. The little brother definitely has feelings for her if Jaehyuk is anywhere near the mark.” So both parties had feelings for one another but both parties were too chicken to say anything to each other. And for no good reason.

In a way that reminded Haruto of himself and it pissed him off. He knew that spending so much time with his new friend would raise suspicions but he didn’t care. He knew that spending so much time with her pissed Jeongwoo off. It didn’t take a genius to recognize it when they went to the Big Bang Concert together.

Haruto thought he was going crazy when he spotted you a few spaces over at the concert. He rubbed his eyes and blinked a few times to make sure it was really you. Haruto stormed over to you once he decided that it was in fact you. He had spent months thinking about what to say to you if he ever saw you again, he wasn’t going to miss this opportunity. Haruto didn’t even think to tell his new friends where he had gone.

You saw a tall, handsome figure approaching your direction. You took a second to check him out, but then turned back to the performers and continued to enjoy yourself. Your parents were reluctant to let you go out to this concert on your own but it was a once-in-a-lifetime experience that you wanted so badly. You smiled sadly at what might happen when you woke up tomorrow.

“I didn’t know you were a fan of Big Bang.” You heard a voice from behind speak into your ear. You jumped in surprise and turned around to see that it was the handsome stranger you saw sauntering your way earlier.

“Hi, what’s your name?” You asked with a polite smile on your face. This is probably exactly what your parents were worried about, creepy men that would try to approach you. You started to think about the best way to remove yourself from the situation safely. The now unamused expression on his face alarmed you.

“When are you gonna cut the shit. You know who I am.”

You looked at him puzzled. “I do? How? From where?”

Haruto felt something in his chest crack. “I used to go to school with you. You’re Y/N right?”

“Oh, yeah. That’s me.” You furiously racked your mind trying to remember what you had read but your memory came up blank. You couldn’t help but cringe and turn away. This is why you tried your best to keep to yourself and away from people. You looked up to see Haruto staring down at you with a curious expression. “I’m sorry I don’t remember you. You said you used to go to school with me? You don’t go to school with me anymore? Can I get your name again? I’m really sorry. I’ll try and remember.”

“My name is Haruto. I don’t go to school with you anymore. I transferred to a new school a few months ago.”

“Oh, I see.”

Haruto wasn’t sure how to feel when he realized you actually had zero recollection of him. For some reason seeing you up close and seeing you really trying to remember him made him feel a bit sympathetic. He couldn’t understand why. It still totally irked him that you didn’t know his name. But something told him to sit down with you and get to know you.

“Well, do you like your new school?” You asked, looking up at Haruto. Your heart was beating hard and fast. You prayed that your face wasn’t flushing.

“Why don’t we just enjoy the rest of the concert for now and we can grab a late night meal after the concert?” Haruto proposed. His own palms were sweaty and his heart was beating fast.

You thought about it for a second, then nodded and smiled. Haruto felt like the world had a glittery filter for a second. He’d always acknowledged that you were attractive, but up close smiling at him, you were drop dead gorgeous.

“Awesome.”

After the concert, the two of you walked side by side as you left the crowded venue. You noticed Haruto took a second to text someone on his phone. He caught you snooping and laughed as you turned away. “It’s fine. I was just letting the friends I came with know that I was gonna head out with you.”

“Oh, if you need to get back with them it’s fine.” You said, maybe hanging out with Haruto was a bad idea after all.

“Not a chance, it’s been so long since I’ve seen you. I’m honestly curious to know how you are and how things are back home.”

Your face flushed at his words. You couldn’t remember the last time you had spent time with a guy like this. Was this a date?

“Alright. Then what are you in the mood for?” You asked, pulling up a list of restaurants that were still open at this hour.

“What’s available now? What are you in the mood for right now?” Haruto looked over your shoulder at the menu as he asked.

“Um, what about McDonald’s? I’m not that picky and there’s not that much open right now.” you said.

Haruto stared at you with wide eyes, were you always this cool? So the two of you made your way to the closest McDonald’s and debated which was better, Coke or Sprite. To Haruto, Coca-Cola was non-negotiable.

“How is your new school?” You asked Haruto, munching on a few of your fries. “Do you like it?”

“What are you doing here?” Haruto interjected.

“What do you mean?”

“We’re not in Japan. This is far from home. Why are you in America?”

“Oh, I’m uh- I’m visiting family. I’ve actually transferred to a school around here for the time-being as well.” You jumped in surprise when Haruto shrieked.

“You’re here now? Like for good? Like you go to school here? Where?”

You giggled at the questions he rained down on you. The way he asked you with his cheeks full and eyes wide was rather endearing. “Yes I’m here now. I’m actually, uh, home schooled for the time being.”

“Oh, interesting. Why are you homeschooled? I remember you were always really good at school.” Haruto said before he shoved another chicken nugget into his mouth. The irritating thought that you were always better than him at school, just by a little popped up in his mind but he pushed it away. That didn’t matter anymore. He had your attention now.

You felt your face flush. Even with your condition it was true that you maintained your good grades. So Haruto must have actually known you back in Japan. You eyed him again, when he caught you staring at him you turned away. Haruto smirked.

“Enough about me. Tell me about your friends. You said you came with friends from your new school right?”

“Well I’d say one of them is actually who I’d consider a friend. The other one is a mutual friend. A childhood friend that has feelings for her.”

“Her?” it slipped out of your mouth. Haruto’s smirk reappeared and his eyebrow jumped up when he looked at you. You looked away, what was this funny feeling in your chest? It was weird.

“Our school had this transfer student program and she just happened to be assigned to me. She’s really cool, I’m not into her like that and she’s not really into me like that. She likes her friend.”

“How do you know?”

“She told me.”

“Oh. That feels like something important. Like a secret.”

“Well, I told her a secret as well.”

You stared at him. He didn’t indulge in the secret. Haruto was wholly focused on sipping the last of his Coca-Cola before putting it down on the table and letting out a sigh.

“Well so what’s going on with them now?” You asked.

“Hopefully, they both pull their heads out of their asses tonight. I gave them time alone so the best case scenario is that they just talk it out. The dude, Jeongwoo, I actually met him for the first time tonight and he’s a cool dude. It would be nice to have more dude friends around here.”

“You don’t have any guy friends?”

“I do. There are 3 other transfer students from Japan and they’re all dudes and I’m friends with them. Actually, Americans like to play this sport. Lacrosse? My friend told me to try out for the team and I think I might. Mashi, Asahi, and Yoshi agreed to try-out as well so it’ll be fun.”

You nodded, you had no idea what lacrosse was and you didn’t think you would be that interested to learn either. “I should get home.”

“Right of course.” Haruto said, getting up. “Where are you headed? Let me call you an Uber.”

“No, it’s okay. I can actually walk back home from here.”

“Oh really? Well, at least let me walk you back.”

You hesitated for a second. Would it be smart to show this guy where you lived? But then you shook it off, he seemed pretty harmless throughout the night and you trusted that he knew you from school in Japan. So you agreed.

“Do you have to be home-schooled?” Haruto asked.

“No, I don’t think so.” you answered.

“Would you be interested in attending school in person again?” Haruto could feel the devil on his shoulder kicking him. What was he doing? He had already gone to school with you before and the fact that you always did just a smidge better than him drove him nuts.

“Um, I haven’t really thought about it. Why?”

“You should consider transferring to my school?”

Your eyebrows shot up. “What?”

Haruto stepped back a bit and raised his hands. “It was just a suggestion. Honestly, I struggled a bit when I first came here. I can’t imagine how lonely it must be to be here and just be home-schooled so I figured it might be nice to have some sense of community.”

“Um, I’ll think about it.” You weren’t going to think about it. You looked up and breathed a sigh of relief when you saw the familiar apartment complex. “This is me. You don’t have to walk in with me. I’m gonna go now.”

“Wait.” Haruto said. You turned around to look at him, a thin smile on your face. “I, uh, I had fun.”

“Yeah, this was nice.” You said truthfully.

“We should do it again sometime.” Haruto said. You stared at him, he looked perfectly composed to you. But his heart was practically beating so hard he thought it might fall out of his chest.

“Honestly, I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.”

Haruto felt a heat and anger flare up in his chest. But he did his best to tamp it down and get it under control. This was literally the first time you had acknowledged his presence. He put a smile on his face. “Well, then maybe we’ll just run into each other again sometime.”

“Maybe, it’s all up to fate now. Good night Haruto.”

“Good night Y/N.”

The second you made it back into your room you pulled out your diary. You scribbled the notes you had logged into your phone throughout the day as quickly as possible. Briefly reliving each moment as you wrote them down. By the time you had gotten to the end of the list and began to recount the concert you could feel your eyelids getting heavier and heavier and your hands writing more and more frantically until suddenly, you crashed.

The next morning you woke up and read your notes. You squinted at the last thing you had written. Your handwriting became illegible near the end. ‘Haruto?’

The next morning Haruto woke up and smiled at the memory of you. Asahi and Mashiho eyed their roommate as he pranced around the living room and kitchen smiling and singing. But nothing could bring Haruto down. Well until he saw his friend looking depressed as hell.

“Dude what’s up?” Haruto asked. “Did you and Jeongwoo figure your shit out?”

“Uh, about that. Well, no.”

“No? What do you mean no?”

“Well what about you? Did you run into her?”

“Nuh uh, this isn’t about me. You literally had the perfect opportunity to make something of it. To make a moment! Did you guys have a moment?”

“Yes, I think we did. But I got scared. I don’t want to lose Jeongwoo as a friend, but at the same time I don’t think he has any feelings for me like that. I just, I think I need space. Maybe if I just distance myself from him a bit then I can get over my feelings and…”

“No offense, but that’s the stupidest thing I think I’ve ever heard in my life.”

“Well I don’t care if you think it’s stupid. This is my decision and my decision is that I don’t want to see Jeongwoo for awhile. Ok? I’m not ready for the conversation. So you better get used to seeing me more often!”

Haruto sighed as he watched his friend storm out of the room. He turned around and exchanged looks with Asahi. “Did I say something wrong?”

Asahi shrugged. “Honestly, I think you’re valid. I think her logic in avoiding Jeongwoo is pretty dumb. The dude’s in my gym class. Honestly, he’s chill. I don’t think he’d react badly to her if she confesses regardless of how he feels.”

“I should probably find her and apologize anyway.” Haruto said, exiting the room. Eventually he found his friend and they sat together in the cafeteria.

“Sorry about what I said earlier. I’ll admit it was kind of harsh. But honestly I can’t say I understand your logic at all.”

“It’s fine Haruto. You seemed extra happy when you walked in this morning. Who was the friend that you saw at the concert?”

“It was her. Y/N.”

“No way! Isn’t she in Japan?”

“That’s what I thought too. I was so shocked to see her.”

“What did you say to her? What did you guys talk about? Did she recognize you?”

“That’s the thing. The best part of it all was that I actually had her attention. You remember I told you about how she never acknowledged anybody right? She was always reading her notebook in the hallway. In the past when I spoke to her she never even knew my name! She had to ask me every single time. But this time, there’s no way she wouldn’t remember me!”

“Your relationship is weird. But I guess that’s sweet. What does she write about in her notebook?”

“I don’t know. Why does it matter? She knows my name now!”

“That’s another thing. You went to school together for years and she never remembered your name? Why?”

“I don’t know.” Haruto said. Now he was grouchy. All the questions that had been brought up to him were valid, but these weren’t things he wanted to think about.

A few weeks before the lacrosse tryouts in the spring Haruto went to the hospital to get a physical done.

Once he was done he stumbled into a small cafe right next to the hospital. When he saw who was manning the cash register he rubbed his eyes and looked away and looked back a few times to make sure he wasn’t being deluded. When he was confident that he wasn’t going crazy he stood up and walked over to the register.

You saw a tall, handsome, and skinny guy walk up to the cash register. You cleared your throat and stood up straight. “Hello, what can I get you?”

“Y/N! It’s fate. We ran into each other again!”

“Again?” You put a smile on your face and thought of a response. “Hey, it’s so good to see you! How have you been? What’ll you have?”

“Do you...remember my name?”

You felt your heart picking up speed and your palms beginning to sweat. But you kept your composure. “Of course, let me take your order and we can chat for a second.”

Haruto beamed. “Okay, then I’ll just have an Iced Americano.”

“Okay, that’ll be $3.30. The ice machine is in the back so I’ll be right out in a second. You rushed to the back of the cafe and pulled out your diary and flipped through the pages, reading the entries as quickly as possible. Out of the corner of your eye you noticed a torn piece of paper that had slipped out of your bag. You picked it up, it matched the paper in your diary. You flipped it over to see that it had a name written on it. Haruto.

Was that this guy’s name? Who was he to you? Darn it, why hadn’t you written more?

You quickly filled the cup with ice and walked out filling the cup with cold brew. You grabbed the marker and scribbled Haruto on it. You walked back over to the cash register. This guy’s eyes were practically glittering in anticipation. Was it normal for someone to get this excited over a coffee?

“I’ve got one iced americano for Haruto?” you said.

If his eyes were glittering before, they were practically flashing light strobe lights at a nightclub now. A matching beaming grin on his face. “Yes! Y/N it’s fate. We ran into each other again!”

“Right. Yeah, of course. What are the odds.”

“Do you have a minute?”

“Um, I’m working right now. I’d rather not get in trouble. Maybe another time?”

Haruto swiveled around, eying the cafe. “It looks pretty empty to me. I don’t think you’d get in trouble if you came out for a second just to keep me company.”

“Still…”

“Is your manager even here right now?”

“No.”

“Then come on. Just come out for a second.”

You looked around the cafe, cursing at how vacant it was. You tugged at your sleeves for a second before answering. “Fine.”

You followed Haruto out from behind the counter. He walked over to a table and pulled a seat out from underneath the table. He smiled as he waited for you to sit down. You walked over to the table and turned around. Haruto slid the chair underneath you as you moved to sit down. Once you were seated Haruto ran around to the other side of the table and sat down.

“How are you? How have you been?” Haruto asked.

You stared at the boy sitting in front of you. He was so handsome. “I’m doing well. How about you?”

“I’m good. I was in the area because I needed to go to the hospital.”

Your ears perked up. “Why were you at the hospital?”

“Why do you wanna know? Are you worried about me?”

You didn’t say anything. You just stared at Haruto. Haruto cleared his throat and looked away for a second. “I’m just playing with you. I went to get a physical.”

You nodded, tracing the patterns on the tablecloth.

“I needed one for lacrosse tryouts.”

“Lacrosse? What is that?” you asked. Haruto thought the way your nose scrunched in confusion was adorable.

“I told you about it last time! Remember? It’s this sport that Americans like to play. I had never heard of it in Japan either.”

You didn’t remember. “Right.”

Haruto couldn’t understand the dynamics of the conversation. He watched as you avoided eye contact with him and intensely focused on tracing the pattern of the table cloth. Then you would stare out the window of the cafe, it almost appeared as if your eyes were glazed over. “What are you always writing about in your notebook?”

Your head spun over to look at him so fast, you thought you might have gotten whiplash. “What?”

“Your notebook. I remember in school back in Japan I always saw you either writing things down in a notebook or reading the same notebook. What’s in it?”

“Um, nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

“Why? It can’t be that bad. I promise I won’t laugh no matter how embarrassing it might be.” Haruto said. Leaning forward over the table so that he was in your face.

“Forget it.” You said, leaning back and looking away. You glanced over at your bag that was perched far back behind the counter and breathed a sigh of relief. “Look. I gotta go. I’m supposed to be working right now. I think you should go now as well.”

You stood up from the table so quickly that the chair you were sitting on toppled over. You didn’t bother to turn around and pick it up. You walked back towards the counter without looking back.

Haruto watched you as you walked away. He narrowed his eyes when he saw you grab your bag and walk to the back of the cafe. There was only one thing on his mind as he walked out of the cafe. Your notebook. What was in the notebook?

You frantically flipped to today’s page in your notebook. In all caps with your boldest, darkest black marker you wrote at the top of your notebook. ‘Beware of Haruto. Tall, Handsome. Asked about notebook.’

Then you shut the notebook and exited the back room, breathing a sigh of relief when you noticed that the cafe was vacant once again. You walked over to the cafe table where you had previously sat and picked up the chair that had fallen over when you had left the conversation.

The next day at school Haruto was deep in thought. What could possibly be so important about a notebook? When Hanbyul shoved him, Haruto shrieked as he fell out of his chair. “Dude, what the hell is your problem?”

“What are you thinking about? You look like you’re thinking so hard that your brain might break.”

“Do you have an important notebook? Is that like something girls do?”

“You mean like a diary?”

Haruto snapped his fingers and looked up. “Yes! Exactly like one of those. Do you have one of those?”

“I did when I was younger. I don’t keep one anymore though. Why do you ask?”

“My friend. The one from home, Y/N? I think she has one. I asked her about it yesterday and she got all dodgy and weird.”

“Ah, well. Back when I did keep a diary it held all my dirtiest secrets. I don’t think I would want to share it with anybody or for anybody to know about it. Not even now, and as an elementary schooler I really don’t think I had any secrets worth keeping.”

“It was so weird. She got so defensive over it. I didn’t realize bringing it up would be such a touchy subject.”

Hanbyul shrugged. “Different things matter to different people. Are you ready for tryouts? They’re coming up soon aren’t they?”

Haruto nodded. “Asahi, Mashiho, Yoshi, and I have started going to that gym that you recommended. Lacrosse is actually pretty fun. Mashiho is the best though. Are you coming to tryouts?”

“Of course I am. I’m practically making you go so it’s only fair that I be there to see how you do. I reserve the right to totally make fun of you if you embarrass yourself though.”

Haruto rolled his eyes. “Yeah, whatever.”

Soon enough it was the first day of lacrosse tryouts. Haruto had frequented the cafe that you worked at in hopes of getting the chance to speak to you again. Unfortunately, what he didn’t know was that you had quit the job and diligently stayed home and studied.

Haruto was agitated at the thought of not being able to speak to you again. When he tried to sit down and rationalize it himself he couldn’t make sense of it. A year ago he despised you for not knowing his name. You know his name now, right? What more did he want from you?

“Haruto? Haruto! Hello? Are you even listening to me?”

Haruto turned to look at Hanbyul. “Honestly no, sorry. What’s up?”

“I feel bad for how I treated Jeongwoo. You were right, avoiding him was not the right thing to do. But why hasn’t he said anything to me?”

“Look I can’t tell you what’s going on between the two of you any better than you can. My assumption is that he’s a bit hurt and confused at the moment by how you’re acting and he doesn’t want to make things any worse than they are.”

“Can’t you say something to him?”

“Me?” Haruto looked up from his stick that he was re-taping. “What do you want me to say to him?”

“I don’t know. Just...just get him to react.”

Haruto scoffed. “If you want me to do that I can but again I feel like it’s not going to produce the results that you want. Like I think if I say anything things are gonna go really sour so I think you should think long and hard about this.”

“Haruto!”

“Look, I gotta go. Tryouts are starting.” Haruto said, turning away and walking onto the field. He didn’t miss the hard stare coming his way from Jeongwoo. Haruto ignored them and focused on his gameplay. Lacrosse had actually become really cathartic for him and he found that he really wanted to make the team.

Haruto noticed that the coaches seemed to be reacting favorably to how he was playing. He also realized that Jeongwoo was also really good but he played really aggressively, like he had something to lose. At the end of practice Haruto figured his hunches must have been correct because the coaches called him over to speak with him.

“I’m sure you know Varsity tryouts were this morning, all of your friends from Japan did great as did you and so we’re thinking about pulling you up to varsity. So tomorrow I want you to come early and try out with the varsity team, alright?”

Haruto beamed and nodded.

“Good work son.” The coach slapped Haruto on the shoulder. He did his best not to fall over. Thankfully the coach didn’t notice.

Haruto walked off the field and headed towards the school parking lot. Just as he pulled his phone out to call someone for a ride home his phone pinged, he tapped on the notification to see that it was a message from Mashiho.

Mashiho: Haruto have JV tryouts ended?

Haruto: Yes, I just finished

Mashiho: Cool. Have you found a ride home yet?

Haruto: No, do you know anyone who can come get me?

Mashiho: Ya, a lot of the guys on varsity can drive. Junkyu is over now but he offered to come pick you up.

Haruto: Junkyu?

Mashiho: He’s trying out for the varsity team. He’s cool. Kinda goofy but cool. I’ll come by with him.

Haruto: Alright, thanks dude.

Mashiho: Np.

Haruto checked the time on his phone before putting it back into his pocket. 6 P.M. Would you be at the cafe? The last few times he had gone by he hadn’t seen you. He put the thought away when a car appeared in front of him. The window rolled down and Mashiho cheered when he saw Haruto. “Get in the car! You smell!”

“Shut up and unlock the door Mashi.” The car door clicked open and Haruto hopped into the backseat. There was a large dude sitting in the driver’s seat who kept fidgeting with a bunch of random controls.

The guy turned around with a giant grin on his face. “Hello! I’m Junkyu. You must be Haruto! Nice to meet you!”

Haruto bowed. “Hello. Yes, I am Haruto. Nice to meet you as well.”

“Ruto! How were tryouts?”

“They were really good. Coach pulled me over at the end of tryouts and told me to come early tomorrow morning and try out with the varsity team.”

“Damn! You must be so good!” Junkyu said from the driver’s seat. Haruto tried not to be concerned by the way Junkyu was driving. His head kept swiveling from left to right. “Did you guys play sports back in Japan? All of you were insane at tryouts today!”

“We all played football. I think Mashi and Yoshi played basketball as well.”

“Football? Do you mean football football or soccer football?”

“Eh?”

“Do you kick a ball or do you carry a ball?”

“You kick it. Duh. Why would you carry a ball? That’s just dumb.”

“Americans call a totally different sport football. Don’t worry about it too much. But it’s awesome that you guys are so good.”

“Well to be fair, we were told about that Lacrosse Club and we had a few training sessions every week leading up to try outs.” Mashiho said.

“Ahh! How’d you hear about that? A few of us have been playing on their club teams for a while.”

“My friend told me about it. She’s the person responsible for me in the foreign exchange students program. Hanbyul?”

“Oh! I know who you’re talking about. Her brother was a legend at this school. He was a top recruit since his sophomore year here. But right before the most important game of his senior year he tested positive on a drug test and he couldn’t play. It totally turned him, his team, and the school around. He got dropped by the college that was recruiting him. But I heard he struck a deal with a pro-team and I guess he’s been training with them. The dude was in a league of his own.”

“Damn. That’s insane.”

“Yeah, our school takes lacrosse pretty seriously. The best players at our school get recruited to some of the best schools so it’s a great opportunity.”

Haruto knew there were probably more important things to be thinking about in this conversation but he couldn’t help but wonder if he could get you to come to one of his games.

The second day of tryouts Haruto was absolutely on fire. His shorts were shart, his passes were quick, and his steps were light. The varsity team was definitely of a different caliber but Haruto found the challenge fun. It was nice to be able to play with the rest of the Japanese boys as well.

At the end of varsity tryouts the coach pulled him over, “you were great out there today. How are you feeling?”

“I’m feeling alright coach.”

“Up for a few more hours?”

Haruto paused, but then nodded. He wasn’t in a place to argue with his coaches. “Sure.”

“Great. Then I want you to continue through JV tryouts. Grab some water and then head back out onto the field.”

“Alright coach.”

Haruto jogged out to the edge of the field. He was surprised to see Hanbyul sitting at the edge of the bleachers. “What’s up?”

“Hey, what are you doing here?”

“What do you mean what am I doing here? I came to watch your second day of tryouts.”

“Are you sure you’re here to watch me?”

“Shut up. Why are you all sweaty already?”

“Coach had me try out with the varsity team today.”

Hanbyul’s eyes widened. “Dang, you must be awesome. The last two boys that made it onto the varsity team as sophomores were my brother and his best friend Bobby.”

Haruto shrugged. “The game is fun. It would be awesome to play on varsity.”

The coach blew his whistle, signalling all the players to come back out onto the field. Haruto turned around and gathered around. Every so often throughout the day Haruto ran back to the bleachers where Hanbyul sat. His bag was stowed away there as was his secret stash of Coca-Cola. It probably wasn’t smart to be drinking Coke in the middle of tryouts but every so often he needed a pick-me-up.

“You need to quash that habit.”

“Yeah yeah.”

At the end of the day the coach told Haruto to wait for him inside his office. So Haruto did just that.

“So what’d you think about tryouts today?” Coach asked.

“It was intense.”

“Yeah, what did you think of the way the varsity team played?”

“They were quicker, sharper, and more nimble.”

“Good observation. Do you think you were good enough to play on their level?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, then answer me another question. If you had to pick another player from the JV tryouts today to pull up to Varsity who would you pick?”

Haruto thought about it for a second. The answer was obvious. The only other person who seemed to put up a fight with him was “Jeongwoo.”

“Good guess.” The coach laughed. “I don’t know what they feed you kids in Japan. But all four of you are good.”

There was a knock on the door. Haruto turned around to see Jeongwoo. He smirked when he saw the sour expression on Jeongwoo’s face. But it was gone once he had walked into the room and stood adjacent to Haruto.

“The two of you have demonstrated amazing capabilities and I am considering pulling one of you up to the varsity team. Take this opportunity seriously. Tomorrow is the last day of tryouts.”

The last place Haruto expected to run into you was at the hospital. The last thing you were expecting at the hospital was for a dude to come up behind you and scare you. It was horrible, you can’t remember the last time you screamed so loudly, let alone at a public place.

“What are you doing here Y/N?”

“Uh, I’m-” you hesitated, trying to craft an answer that was vague enough that you wouldn’t have to tell the whole truth but not vague enough that he wouldn’t continue to ask questions. But thankfully Haruto seemed to take it upon himself to fill the silence.

“Look, I just wanted to say I’m sorry that I totally misjudged you when I first met you? In fact, I thought I hated you.”

Alarm bells went off in your head. Was it normal for a person to come to you and tell you they hated you? “Uh, thanks?”

But Haruto continued. “But I wanted to say I totally read you wrong. You’re actually really cool. And I wanted to say thank you. For remembering my name.”

That was the first time someone had ever said that to you. You stared at him blankly unsure of how to respond.

“Haruto! Haruto! Haruto! Please report to waiting room 105, the doctor is ready for you now.” The voice over the loudspeaker belted.

“Well, that’s me.” Haruto said with a soft smile on his face. He got up and waved goodbye to you before heading to the back of the office.

Once he was safely out of sight you pulled out your notebook. Your face paled once you flipped through it a few times. You thought about what to do. What did this guy want? You wrote out all these questions in your notebook. Then you came to a conclusion of what to do and wrote that down in your notebook as well.

You ripped out a piece of paper from your notebook and scribbled your number on it. Then got up to the receptionist desk. “Hi, I don’t know if you’re allowed to do this. But when that guy Haruto comes out. Would you mind giving him this?”

You handed the sheet of paper over to her, the receptionist gave you a look and then a wink before accepting the sheet of paper. You figured that meant she accepted, so you waved goodbye and left the hospital.

“Excuse me sir!” The receptionist lady called out to Haruto as he was about to head out of the doctor’s office. What felt and looked like a nasty possible sprain on the lacrosse field just turned out to be a measly bruise.

Haruto approached the reception desk. “There was a young lady earlier. She asked me to give this to you before you leave.”

Haruto looked at the slip of paper. His eyes widened into the size of large gumballs when he realized what was on it. He felt like his heart would explode. But then his mind pumped the brakes, he wasn’t ungrateful, but why did you give him your number?

On the way back home you second guessed your decision at least 30 times. Why did you give him your number? The only reason you could think of was that you didn’t want to not know the guy. Contrary to what your mind and your diary told you. Your heart didn’t want to give him up. Maybe it was selfish and confusing, who knew? But who cared?

Haruto’s excitement was cut short when he finished punching your number into his contacts. Before he could even send a message to you, his phone rang. Hanbyul.

“Hey Hanbyul, what’s up?”

Haruto became alarmed when he heard a sniff and a muffled sob. “Haruto, I miss him.”

Haruto sighed. “He’ll come around soon.”

“Is there nothing you can do to make him come around sooner?”

“Hanbyul. If all goes well he’s going to be my teammate. Plus, what could I possibly say to change things?”

“I don’t know. He probably thinks there’s something going on between us.”

Haruto paused. “Is that why you’re friends with me?”

“No, no I swear it’s not. You’re an amazing person and you’ve been an amazing friend.”

“Hanbyul.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t like what you’re asking me to do. But you are my friend. If you’re really sure this is the way you want to go about it.”

“I’m- I’m not sure. I just need things to change.”

On the third day of tryouts Haruto was in a funk. And it showed. The events of yesterday night haunted him, he was happy to see you but he was sorry for Hanbyul. Haruto didn’t really like to fight with anybody, but he found her requests unreasonable and the questions she asked about you probing and uncomfortable.

It seemed as if Jeongwoo was the same way. Haruto gave into the niggling voice inside his head and said probably he shouldn’t have said. “You’re gonna lose your girl to me and now you’re gonna lose your spot on the team to me?”

It pushed Jeongwoo off the edge and the two of them went at it. Haruto played ferociously and aggressively. As did Jeongwoo. The game ended when Jeongwoo illegally body checked Haruto.

“Dude what the hell is your problem?”

“No, what’s your problem? Your comment back there? Absolutely uncalled for.”

Valid. But Haruto wasn’t going to admit that. “Please. Pull your head out of your ass. You’re hurting your friend. Talk to her.”

Haruto stood by as he and Jeongwoo got scolded for their behavior. Eventually, tryouts ended with neither one ending up on the varsity team. Haruto knew he probably should have been more bothered but he wasn’t. He had other things on his mind.

When Haruto exited the office he saw Hanbyul waiting outside. She turned to look away from Jeongwoo back to Haruto. Tired and hopeful that their saga would end, Haruto smiled and jutted his chin out towards Jeongwoo. Hanbyul smiled and ran after Jeongwoo.

Since the fateful day you have Haruto your number. Whenever he had a free moment he would ask to see you. After each time you saw him, you thoroughly wrote down everything that had happened in the day. You didn’t want to forget.

A few Mondays ago, you went to get ice cream together. “What’s your favorite food, Haruto?”

“Me? Anything unhealthy.”

You whacked him on the arm for that.

“Ow! What was that for?”

“For being a stupid teenage boy. And because I’m jealous of your metabolism.”

A couple Thursdays ago, Haruto asked you if you wanted to go watch a movie with him. The Uber and the weather didn’t quite work out. “Sorry we missed the movie by 45 minutes. But on the bright side, it’s not raining anymore!”

You laughed. “I guess you’re right. What should we do instead now that we’re here?”

Haruto looked around. He pointed at the grassy meadow. “We should just lay down on the grass and look at the stars.”

“The grass is wet.”

“Look, they're selling plastic tarps over at that convenience store. Let’s just buy one.”

“Okay.”

Haruto paid for a plastic tarp and spread it down out on the grassy meadow. The two of you laid on the ground parallel to one another. Until Haruto turned to you “can I hold you?”

You felt your face flush and you looked away. You hesitated for a few moments but eventually Haruto smiled when he heard a soft “yeah.”

So he moved his arm as you lifted your head to rest on top of it. You curled into him as his arm wrapped around your upper body. Haruto’s stomach exploded in butterflies. Your face was on fire. But the two of you were happy, blissful.

Last Friday night Haruto asked you to come to one of his lacrosse games. “Y/N, this is my friend Hanbyul. Hanbyul, this is Y/N.”

“Y/N?” Hanbyul stared at you eyes wide. Like she knew something. She looked like she wanted to say something but she held it in. You wondered what it was, but decided not to think too much about it.

Hanbyul was sweet. She kept you company throughout the game. But she was an aggressive cheer-er. Most of her attention was spent yelling at the field. Her energy was contagious and by the end of the game you were standing on the bleachers cheering “Go Haruto!”

Now it was Saturday and the two of you had finally gone to see the movie that you had meant to see a couple Thursdays ago. You clasped onto the arm that Haruto had held out for you as you exited the movie theater. “That movie was so good! It was so crazy!”

Haruto laughed. “Yeah it was okay.”

“Just okay? You didn’t like it?”

“No, I liked it. It wasn’t bad. But I feel like there were better movies from this cinematic universe you know?”

“Yeah I guess.”

“Which one was your favorite?” Haruto asked.

“Huh?” You looked up at Haruto to see him looking down at you. You turned away. “Um. Would you wanna come back to my place?”

“Huh?” Haruto wasn’t normally caught off guard but this time he was.

“I mean. Not like that. I just, I don’t know I’m not ready for the night to end and I figured since my place is close by we could just go back and chat.”

Haruto smiled. “Yeah, that sounds nice. Let’s go.”

Soon after the two of you arrived at your place, Haruto got situated on the couch and after making sure he was properly settled in. You had gotten up to go fetch your drinks. Haruto spotted your notebook sitting on the edge of the coffee table. He glanced over to see that your attention was fully occupied on making your drinks. Haruto turned back to stare at the notebook. No. The notebook was staring at him. Haruto knew it was wrong. He knew he shouldn’t peek.

But he couldn’t help it. Every time he saw you he either saw the notebook with you or he saw you writing the notebook and every time he even remotely looked in its direction you guarded it with your life. This could be his only chance.

And so, Haruto grabbed the notebook. He flipped through it and saw that it was very meticulously dated. Upon closer inspection he noticed that each entry was timed as well and every timed entry had extensive details about what you saw, what you talked about. Then he flipped backwards and found one page not like the others.

This page wasn’t dated. Instead, it was titled. Haruto. Haruto’s eyes widened. Every line of his designated page was filled. There were things about him on there that even he hadn’t realized he had said. Why had you written all these things down? All these details didn’t seem that important to him. They were like things that were probably easily remembered. Or things you could ask him about, he’d answer if you ever asked him about.

Just as he was about to continue flipping through the pages of the notebook. “What do you think you’re doing?”

An index card fluttered out of the notebook right at Haruto’s feet. Haruto bent down to pick it up. But in a panic you kicked his shin and as he howled and grabbed onto his leg you snatched the card. “What the hell Y/N?”

“No. I should be asking you that. I’ve made it abundantly clear that this notebook is not to be touched. It’s incredibly private to me.”

“What is it? Why is it so important? I asked Hanbyul what it might be and she just said it was probably a diary. What is so special about yours?”

“What is so special about mine?” you were so angry you felt like your head was about to pop. While your head didn’t pop. Your mouth certainly did. “What is so special about mine? This notebook? This notebook. Is my memory. I don’t have a memory.”

You tossed the card at Haruto. He picked it up and read the words on the card as you spoke.

“At age 13 you were involved in a very traumatic car accident. The accident left you in a coma for two weeks. After you recovered from your coma you were diagnosed with anterograde amnesia. From that day on, you no longer have the ability to make memories. The memories you make within a day will only last until you fall asleep wherein your memories of the previous day will be wiped. Use your notebooks to keep track of your days. Use these notebooks to help you remember.”

You could hear your voice waver as you finished reciting the contents on the index card.

“Y/N, I-” Haruto said. The world seemed grayer and grimmer. Everything made so much sense now. Why every time he spoke to you in school you had to ask for his name. Why sometimes you looked confused or blank when he mentioned something or attempted to crack a joke.

“So now you know.” You whispered. You could feel your body start to heave, your breathing became heavy. The gravity of what you had just exposed started to weigh down on you. “You need to leave. You need to leave and never come back.”

“Y/N. I wish you would have told me.”

“Why?” You snarled. “Why would I tell you that? Each day I wake up I can’t even remember who you are. Why would I have told you anything? Just so you could go around pitying me? Telling everyone else about me? Absolutely not.”

Haruto started to feel tears well up in his own eyes. He felt trapped in his own body as he watched your body fail yours. When he saw you collapse something snapped in his head and he got up and picked you up. One arm held you under your shoulder blades and the other below your knees.

“Get. Out.” you said in between wheezes.

“No. Y/N. I’m sorry. I don’t want to. Let me help you.”

“Get. Out.” you said, barely conscious.

“Y/N. You’re scaring me. What do I do? How do I help you? Let me help you and I’ll leave you alone.”

Your eyelids were getting heavier and heavier. Honestly, you weren’t even sure what exactly was going on. Maybe it would be smart to have Haruto call your doctor before he left. “Emergency Numbers. Notebook.”

Haruto placed you down on your bed just as you had passed out. Haruto immediately ran back to the living room and grabbed your notebook that had fallen onto the ground. He flipped through it frantically. What page were the emergency numbers on? He saw them scribbled on the inside of the back cover. He grabbed his phone and dialed the first number listed at the top.

“Hello? Is this Y/N’s doctor? She’s just passed out and I don’t know what to do. I’m in her apartment right now. Someone please come help me.” Haruto hadn’t even realized that tears had been streaming down his face until he saw wet splotches appear on the notebook. He wiped them quickly and sniffed. “This is scaring me.”

“Yes, this is Y/N’s doctor. I’m on my way over. Who is this?”

“Haruto. I’m a friend of hers.”

“Haruto. You did good, son. Just wait. I’ll be there in a second.”

“Doctor. Is she gonna be okay?”

“Honestly I can’t tell you right now. I have to check up on her. Right now I’m in front of her door so you can let me in.” The call ended and Haruto opened the door.

“Is she in her room?” The stout man asked.

Haruto nodded and followed him back into your room. He tried to help the doctor but eventually the doctor turned to him and said “son, just relax. Give me some space. She should be fine. She had a panic attack, something must have worked her up. But she’ll wake up. But, it might be better if you aren’t here by the time she wakes up.

“I understand, doctor.”

The doctor took a good look at him. Then nodded grimly before turning his attention back to you. Before Haruto could leave though he saw a stack of index cards, a roll of washi tape, and a pen sitting on your desk. He was still holding your notebook from earlier. He grabbed the materials and headed back out to the living room.

Before he left he scribbled out a note. Then pulled something out of his wallet and taped it to the back of the index card. He then taped the index card to the inside of the front cover before shutting the notebook and leaving it in the middle of your coffee table. He held in a sob as he got up. How had things gone so sour so quickly?

Haruto walked back over to your room and peeked in. Your doctor was still busy doting on you. So he turned around and exited your apartment. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and called Junkyu. “Hey, can you pick me up?”

“Yeah of course. Send me the address.” Junkyu said, trying not to be too alarmed by the tone of Haruto’s voice.

Eventually, you woke up. After reading the note that your doctor had taped to your hand explaining the situation you took a deep sigh. What a shit show. You needed to find the notebook your doctor had mentioned in his note.

It was sitting in the very middle of your coffee table. You flipped through the last few pages to read your entries. Your eyes started to water and you felt yourself get emotional. You could sense that you had grown close to someone. You read about yourself and how you felt about Haruto, but who was Haruto? For the most part you had made peace with your situation but for the first time in a long time, you began to feel frustrated. Angry. Cheated of a normal life that other 16 year old girls got to live.

Just as you were about to shut the notebook you noticed there were two index cards taped to the inside cover. The first one explained your situation. It was more or less what your doctor had just explained to you. But the second one was new. You lifted it up to your face and began to read it aloud.

Y/N,

If you’re reading this, I want you to know that you are the love of my life. My name is Haruto Watanabe and I am 16 years old. I met you for the first time in our freshman year of high school back then when we lived in Japan. We were only 14 years old. I used to be jealous of you, how you beat me in school every time even if just by a little bit. I also resented you because I thought you never bothered to remember my name.

By some stroke of fate, we both ended up in America. Whether by fate or not we saw each other a few more times and met up with each other and I really began to fall for you. You are the kindest, most beautiful, and genuine person I have ever met in my life.

I want you to know that even with your condition. My opinion and my feelings towards you have not changed. I want to be honest with you and tell you what I did and I hope in time you can read this and not feel angry.

Y/N, I did something bad. I invaded your privacy. You see, every time I saw you you fiercely guarded this notebook. Everytime I asked about it or possibly glimpsed at it you would react so strongly so eventually the curiosity of needing to know what was in the notebook killed me. And one day when your attention was occupied elsewhere, I read it.

It seemed like a regular diary to me but you caught me in the act and got upset with me. You explained to me your condition and I want you to know I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry I behaved so insensitively. If I were a more selfless man I would have left your life for good. But I am not. I’ve attached my school I.D. to the back of this card. On it has my name, my picture, and my phone number.

If you ever find it in yourself to forgive me. Please give me a call. I will always love you.

Love,

Haruto Watanabe

You flipped the back of the card over. Sure enough there was a school I.D. taped to the back. You pulled the card off and stared at it. The boy in the picture was handsome. He was tall. His height was 6’2”. You scoffed, at least you had good taste.

You saw his phone number at the bottom. You pondered over whether or not to call him, what would you even say to him? Where would he even fit in your life?

These were the questions that ran through your mind as you pulled your phone out and dialed his number. You stared at the numbers as you recited them aloud again. Your thumb hovering above the green button.