#harukisakisblog

[deceitful-darlings]

TW: suicide

Can i get yandere childe, ei and scaramouche (not wanderer. It was when he was still a fatui) where reader kills himself because he can no longer handle all the pressure? So like one day they just came and saw his dead body.

If there’s one thing Childe would struggle with, it’s losing his darling. His loyalty to those he cares for is unmatched by anyone, he is completely self sacrificing for them, and of course you’re among those people. I don’t think he would know how to feel, but his denial period would only be brief, Childe isn’t stupid, and I don’t think he would be delusional over your fate. He would fall more into dissociation, he would zone out more, he wouldn’t be as happy and chipper, and he would keep as much of what was ‘yours’ to remind himself of you, and he has your body taken back to Snezhnaya to be honoured with his family’s tradition, after all, family is what you were, what you still are. Your death has no stripped you of that, in his eyes you will always be his even after death. He will tell his remaining family stories of you and your relationship through rose tinted glasses. While he is well aware of the reality of what your relationship was, he was certain you would come to a point of acceptance, and his younger siblings don’t need to know the reality of it. He wants them to remember you as he enivisioned your future together. Of course, he throws himself into his tasks and battles, completely reckless, dancing with death at every point he can. He knows he can’t die, he needs to be there for his family and the Tsaritsa, but a part of his passion died with you.

Now, Ei would be surprised, and most definitely hurt. Her whole arc is specifically around how badly she deals with loss. But unfortunately for you, you chose the wrong woman to end your life with. Separate souls and bodies are nothing new to her, her own body is a puppet now, remember? In fact, in some ways she prefers it this way. She’s an archon, and your soul could never move to the next plane of existence fast enough, your being still exists but simply has no shell to exist within, which is what would corrode you. But she has done this before, she knows what she’s doing. She could quite literally trap you inside the Plane of Euthymia with her for an eternity, making her inescapable for you. In fact it’s the reason I placed as one of the most dangerous, she goes beyond physical harm, she could quite literally kill you and keep your spirit. Even if, for some reason, your soul was incompatible with the Plane of Euthymia or began to have issues from it, she could literally just build you another body, she has already done so once before. It would only need to have the lowest form of function to store your soul, a puppet chained to the dark, a face void of all features, trapping you in a lonely, silent, void, unable to feel touch, move, speak. It could drive you to the point of insanity. But then there is a glimpse in the darkness, the sound of a breeze, and if you could cry, you would.

“Do you see now what you did to me? Finding you as I did? This is how I felt, how I have felt for centuries before you came. Could you bear it as I have? Do you truly wish to plunge me back into that abyss?”

But you can’t respond, you can do nothing but hear. Over time she gives your body its senses, she gives you eyes and a nose and a mouth, and finally even limbs, so well crafted, so human that if you weren’t aware of your own death you could probably convince yourself that it had never happened. But don’t be mistaken, this body is far from organic, and she suspects you of drifting from her again, abandoning her, she will push you back into that void to remind you that she is your only salvation from it.

Scaramouche...oh my lord, Scaramouche. He’s lost so many people already, he’s been betrayed and abandoned in every way, this feels like well and truly the final blow. He’s would go berserk upon finding your body, this wasn’t natural, you ended your own life to leave him behind. You’re not ‘just like the others’, you’re worse for what you’ve done to him. I could genuinely see how Scaramouche’s twisted love could devolve into hatred for you, because it’s just too painful for him to think about how you betrayed him. He would completely desecrate your body, it would be utterly destroyed in his rage, you would get no grave, he wants to forget about you just as he has all the others. But your memory infects everything, his anger towards you leaks into other faucets of his life, he becomes even worse to work for, he’s more dangerous and on edge, and you become a bigger driving force behind his ascension to godhood. Would his godhood be able to bring you back? Probably not, but it becomes one of his goals - he wants you back? To love? Not for a long time. He wants revenge, he wants to destroy you until you’re less than he ever was, lower than his lowest ever point, until you’re begging for his forgiveness. That is his long term goal.

[bump1nthen1ght]

Playtime (Male! Vampire / Male!Reader)

Pairing: Male!Vampire x Male!Reader

Warnings: Explicit Content Ahead (18+ ONLY), Blood kink, Non-Consensual ( Hypnosis/ Compulsion), Biting, Rough Sex

Word Count: 1610 Words

Based off this Request (by @harukisakisblog ): Vampire x male reader. Non con (but reader enjoy it) also rough. Breeding i guess (bonus point if reader did get pregnant) also just reader begging to stop but in the end got turned into a cockslut. Mm、let's see.... I guess reader holes got so full that the cum started to get out of it while reader is just looking at the vampire asking for a second round. Idk man i'm horny so go wild please

If you had to describe the feeling of being compelled, the most apt metaphor you could think of is lying down on the beach. The sand leaves little pinpricks of fuzz on the nape of your neck and the back of your arms, the ebbing tide rund between the crevices of your vertebrae and rushes into your ears. It’s a billion different sensations that feel so small, yet so all encompassing.

That’s what your brain feels right now, body limp in the arms of this monster. Your conscious thoughts seem to ebb at the edge of being actionable, but fade before you can grab on. Your skin feels tingly, the freezing touch of the vampire now sucking on your neck so jarring yet unreal.

“Well, don’t you taste delectable.” The vampire purrs, not even wiping the fresh blood off his lips before kissing you on the cheek. “Yes, I think I made a fine choice. Don’t you agree? ”

The words are like slurry in your head, the vampire not waiting for an answer as he runs a clawed hand under your shirt.

“N-no….stop.” You slur, hand grabbing his wrist in the imitation of force. The vampire laughs, pushing your chest down and forcing you on your back. He wastes no time in throwing your legs over his shoulders, lifting your hips and slipping off your pants. A long, painted claw draws circles in the meat of your thigh, pushing up the hem of your boxers.

“Goodness.” The vampire moans, pressing his mouth right up to the skin and taking a deep breath. “You smell so sweet, I simply must have more.”

The sting of fangs biting into your leg barely registers in your mind, but your hands still push and claw at the vampire's chest, even as he remains immovable. The suction of his mouth, draining the blood from your thigh, is damn near erotic.

The vampire licks at your wound, face smeared in your blood and a wicked smile. His wandering hands moves across the fabric of your underwear and squeezes your cock. Your lower half jolts, unintentionally bucking into his grip. As your cock grows hard the vampire kisses down your leg, eventually reaching your clothed crotch. In a move far too gentle for the situation, he kisses your shaft, dangerous sharp teeth glistening in the low light. The open cut on your leg begins to burn, though it only lingers in the back of your mind

“P-please.” You beg, globes of tears dripping from your eyes. “Please don’t do this.”

The vampire tchts, moving his hand to stroke your erection.

“Aww, sweetheart. I’m only doing what we both want. What we both need.” He laughs again, that taunting laugh that tells you he knows exactly what he’s doing to you. “Now, just relax for me, hmmm?”

Another wave of compulsion washes over you and your hands go limp against his chest. The vampire presses another kiss to your crotch before pulling down your underwear. Your hard cock bounces out, standing stiff against your stomach. The vampire licks his lips, flicking your boxers to the side of the room, off of your ankles.

The vampire sticks its two pointer fingers into its mouth, sucking languidly before releasing with a pop. You know immediately what he plans to do, especially when he smears more blood onto his fingertips. He presses against your tight entrance and you actually thank how the compulsion has relaxed your muscles, letting him sink into your asshole with little pain.

“That’s it. Open up for me, darling.”

A shiver runs down your spine. The pads of his fingers curl inside of you as the vampire reaches his knuckle. He sets a gentle pace of fucking you open, cooing petnames that glide right over you. The sensations shoot all the way to your toes, the vampire quickly finding your prostate and massaging it gently.

Your cock is left unattended, but not for long. The vampire spits into his free palm and begins jerking you off, matching the pace of his fingers and just teasing the heat in your belly. You bite your lip, your subconscious desperately telling you to fight this off. But instead your body whines when his ministrations stop, the burning in your crotch needing more when the vampire pulls his fingers out.

An animalistic keen leaves you, making the vampire laugh.

“So desperate. Don’t worry, I’ve got you.”

With the sound of an undone belt buckle and some shuffled fabric, the vampire throws your legs over his shoulders, bending your limp body into a mating press as something cold touches the bare skin of your ass. Your lazy eyes shoot upward, meeting the vampire's ravenous gaze as he strokes his cock in preparation. That desperate voice, trying to fight, is scared by his size. But the one in control, the unconcious running you right now, is excited by how it might feel.

“Now, I want you to scream for me, can you do that?” Another bout of compulsion, though much weaker than before. “I want to hear my name coming out of that pretty little mouth of yours.” A clawed finger runs across your bottom lip. “Say it for me, dear. Say Emil, please fuck me.”

“Emil, please fuck me.” The unconscious says and you wish it was the compulsion that pushed it to do so.

“Good boy.”

With that, he begins to push his cock inside of your asshole, spitting into his hand and stroking his cock as he does. The pressure is less intense than it could have been without the fingering, but Emil’s girth is still formidable, the compulsion only doing so much to the burn. It doesn’t help that he continues to make lewd comments, Emil groaning as he stretches you open on his dick.

When his hips hit your backside, he moans again.

“Look at that, it’s a perfect fit!” Emil spanks one of your ass cheeks, moaning again when you clench around his cock. “Now, for the fun to begin.”

A strong grip grabs your jaw and pulls you into a sloppy kiss, Emil hunched over your body when he begins pounding your asshole. He shoves his tongue in when you gasp from the pressure, already that tight knot stirring in your belly.

The sound of skin slapping skin is debaucherous, which Emil seems to revel in. He makes sure to elevate his moans and gasps, hands holding tight around your jaw and forcing you to look into his crimson eyes. He licks his lips as he presses and swirls his hips against yours, drinking in your reaction.

“I want you to be loud.” The hand around your throat tightens, just enough to be a threat. You feel your eyes rolling unto the back of your head, your breathless moans getting caught at the back. “Scream for me.” Emil squeezes your throat again, pushing your head onto the bed and sitting himself up as he increases his pace. The compulsion and the way he’s brutalizing your prostate send stars behind your eyelids, your crotch canting towards Emil’s thrusts.

“Fuck! Yes, please, more!” The pleasure is all you know in the moment, your balls feeling tight as Emil laughs. His thumb brushes against your cheek while his other hand spanks your ass again. The buzzing has shot down to your toes again, you cock aching from the lack of attention. You’re actively meeting Emil’s thrusts now, tightening your core and throwing up your backside against Emil’s hips, trying to search for more.

That dizzying feeling approaches again, only elevated when Emil wraps a hand around your cock and begins jerking you off. You gasp, trying to focus in on Emil’s face but everything feels blurry. You recognize his laugh, the way his grip tugs and fondles you, but the context of it all is lost.

“Aww, thats right dearie, come for me. Cum on your master’s cock.”

Even without the psychic powers you feel the tug at your brain and your core, cock twitching in Emil’s hands as fucks you. He’s laughing amidst his moans, his pace growing sloppy as he reaches his own orgasm. “Cum all over yourself, watch as I fill you up.” Emil punctuates his words with powerful thrusts and you know you can’t take much more.

“Shit! Fuck!” You cry out, lower half tightening as your orgasm exploded outward, cum splattering up to your chest. Emil’s moan is beastly as he cums inside of you, spurts of his semen filling you up.

The after glow is short, Emil pulling out with a filthy schlick, brushing his long black hair out of his face. He looks down at you, a self- satisfied smirk taunting you. You can barely lift up your head, limbs shaking from the exertion. Your mind feels like it’s sunk into jello, warped and fruitless to move.

Emil sits back on his haunches, patting your thigh as he just watches you tired body. His cum drips out of you, bite marks on your neck and thigh only confirming your place. You’re his, his play thing.

He moves to sit up, feeling gracious enough to get you a wet rag to wipe yourself off, but is stopped. Your ankle is still hooked around the back of his knee, although you couldn’t stop him completely, it's enough to get his attention. Emil looks down at your face.

Your voice, croaking and desperate, calls to him.

“More.” You pant, weak calves trying to pull him back closer to you. Emil sees your cock, half-hard again, as your pretty eyes practically beg for another round.

Emil smirks. Seems he won’t be needing the compulsion anymore.

[senpiecakes]

Do you accept a request or not? Can i get scaramouche, childe, kazuha and zhongli asking s/o out only for the reader to just explain that they have a dead lover and even after their lover dies. They still love them and don't want to "cheat" on them. And suprise! The dead lover didn't actually die! They just goes missing but it's all good. The reader is happy and the lover is happy everything is good! But for them? Perhaps they'll get lucky next time full of angsty!!!!

IM SO SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG

Notes: My nose bleeds everytime I wake up now. Is that concerning?

Summary: ‘The Other Woman’ by Lana del Rey 

Warning/s: Implied murder + Graphic depictions of death on Childe’s part, Some lore spoilers? Hints of Yandere Childe, Attempted Murder (Childe/Wanderer), Implied Death on all parts, GN! Reader + GN! Lover

Theme/s: GN!Reader and Lover, Angst to comfort (for Y/N only), Angst, Moving on, Unrequited love, One-sided love

Featured: Scaramouche/Wanderer, Zhongli, Kazuha, Childe, Bonus!Albedo

@harukisakisblog

Wanderer

The Wanderer is an unusual individual. You first met him traveling alone in the scorching deserts without proper gear nor equipment, and even food for that matter. Worried he’s going to drop dead at any moment, you took it upon yourself to try and help him. Instead of showing you gratitude, like most weary travelers do, he instead responds with a scowl and a gesture meant to run you off. 

“Leave me alone.” He snaps at you, lowering his hat to avoid your prying stare. The Wanderer was surprised to say the least when you didn’t take his words to heart.

“That’s what the heat does to people!” You retort, throwing a jug of water at him. “Drink. Wherever you’re headed, It’s probably far so you need all the resources you can get.” The Wanderer was a little taken aback by your response. Usually, strangers were wise enough to leave him be, obvious that he didn’t want any companionship. But your naivete didn’t prompt him to try and drive you away. It was getting lonely in the desert anyways.

The Wanderer had no set place to be, just like you were, and the two of you found common ground in that. You traveled together as a caravan of sorts; two strangers just following wherever the road will take them. You tried to get close with whoever you’re traveling with but the most he’s told you was that The Wanderer carries no name; he was secretive with his exploits but told you enough about himself to not see him as a threat unless needed. 

“So you could be kind of my bodyguard.” You tell him enthusiastically. The Wanderer scoffs at your proposal.

“I won’t even try to ward off a cicin for you.” You only laugh lightly at his remarks and he can’t help but be perplexed, time and time again. Day by day, The Wanderer wonders about you and your endurance to such treatment. He thought that maybe he would have driven you away by now, that you’d heatedly trudge off into nowhere and he’d be alone again. That or the heat really was getting into your head and you enjoyed torturing yourself. But you persisted and The Wanderer was shocked at the fact that you didn’t seem to mind him at all.

Soon, The Wanderer found himself not only tolerating your presence, but also looking forward to it. When the two of you stop to gather supplies at a shop somewhere, he finds himself discussing whether the Harra Fruit or Henna Berries would be better for your next journey. He pushes himself to make conversations with you whenever trails grow empty and boring. The Wanderer even opts to carry some of your materials sometimes- begrudgingly of course- saying how if you pass out, he’ll have to carry you all the way back and he doesn’t want to deal with that.

“I thought you won’t even swat off a cicin for me?” 

“Shut up.”

At some point in your endless journey, the two of you became comfortable enough around each other to open up about things you’d never tell a stranger. The most the Wanderer told you was about his memory loss, how he gained it back and now he’s just wandering the world without anything or anyone to keep him from seeing it. 

“Why are you out here in the world?” He asks you next. You hum and stare down at your feet. It was the saddest he’s ever seen your cheery face.

“I… lost someone very important to me.” You say. “They were just like you, you know.” You explain to him the tragedy that befell your said person. They loved to adventure, free as a bird and unconfined by any responsibility. One day, they packed one too little supplies and ended up disappearing for so long that they were eventually pronounced dead from starvation, dehydration, or whatever the wild had to give. That’s why you worry about The Wanderer too much, not wanting him to have the same fate as your lover. You were devastated to say the least but found the strength to pick up where they left off as a means to carry on their legacy. And now you’re here with The Wanderer, living out old dreams as a means to run away from the past. 

Truth be told, The Wanderer was fascinated by your resilience. He couldn’t understand why you of all people in the world- so kind, caring, hopeful- would be able to be with someone like him. The Wanderer watches you look at him like he was the only one you’ll turn to when things go for the worst: if you fall, when you’re tired, when the memories seem too heavy to carry. He feels you hold his hands as you walk through dangerous terrain- his hands that have wrought unthinkable crimes against the world, like he was meant to be held like a gentle feather. Like he was deserving of love just as anyone else.

“You remind me of them,” you told him once. “They were stubborn too.” His heart flutters at the sincerity of your tone, the softness and endearment in your eyes when you look at him as if you are reminded of the one who you had loved before. He hopes that maybe you see past that- that when you look at The Wanderer, new love springs from the ashes and it is only meant for him. You see him as your present and future.

“I could care less.” He’d reply, refusing again and again to perceive you as another person who he could give a chance to. He sees what he used to be in your mannerisms; the curiosity you have towards the world, friendliness and trust for others, willingness to see past the worst in people. The Wanderer thinks that you could be the one he can start over with. Once in a while, he’d imagine such incredulous thoughts- to live most of his days adventuring by your side. You’ve moved on in his mind, your heart now set for him and the past would be gone and it’ll be just the both of you in your shared present. He’d be happier maybe, letting his guard down after years and years of strengthening his own heart for the sake of holding onto the last few remnants of his innocence. The Wanderer would finally be content and he would have to thank you for that.

But all happy things must come to an end in his life. 

One morning, as he is preparing himself for another excursion with you, The Wanderer had hope for the day. He felt as though something good was about to happen. He felt the need to maybe give you a hint of what could be your future together- with him by your side for as long as he could want. He won’t be outright about it, but he’d tell you enough to know how he really cares. Putting his feelings in order, The Wanderer steps out to look for you, and when he does, he feels as though his chest might cave in with the anger that swirled inside it.

The Wanderer watches as you joyfully throw yourself in the arms of someone else, smile wider than he has ever seen, happier than when you are with him. He can overhear your conversation. The person explaining how they were found by an adventuring team who brought them back to safety. They were in recovery for a while and spent their days looking for you. You’re relieved, never wanting to be separated from the one who you thought had been gone from this world. In that moment, you forgot about your traveling companion and it was clear how much you loved the person that wasn’t The Wanderer. His lips press into a thin line, brows furrowed above his wide eyes. His fists form into a tight ball and wind surges through his fists. The Wanderer’s old wounds reopen as he feels the familiar ache of betrayal worming its way through his ‘heart.’ His jaw tightens as he watches you lovingly hold your lover in your hands- your very hands that he found himself feeling safe in, the same he’s held when he feels the world is forgiving enough to let him meet you. The Wanderer’s skin burns with anger as he sees you smile, seemingly forgetting your grief, forgetting how he had been there with you to witness it. Your lover doesn’t deserve your joy. They left you. You’ve moved on with him. Only he gets to have what he wants.

Slowly, The Wanderer trudges over to the both of you, the wind in his palms forming into gusts resembling storms. He was ready to fight, seeing nothing but red as the creeping sensation of deception crawled up his sides. His fury was insatiable and he was ready to discard the lessons he was taught by the gentle wisdom of the Dendro Archon. Fists raised, he was silent and ready; ready to unleash the might of an Archon betrayed. For a split second, he gets a glimpse of your face in his sight, and for a split second, the turbulent winds cease into a breeze.

The Wanderer catches your gaze steadily searching- for him. Your voice rings in his ears- calling his name as your attention from your lover wavers. Your expression displays worry when you can’t find him. Slowly, The Wanderer emerges from the shadows as his wide-eyed stare is transfixed onto you. You see him, and he is caught off guard by your smile; so welcoming, so warm and sincere. Your gentle hands break free from your lover's grasp and you hold them out to him, calling him to draw near and be with you. The Wanderer’s gaze never left your eyes- full of kindness and innocence- reminding him of his own when he was still new to the world devoid of suffering. But you, you had suffered just as he did, and even then when you were at the peak of your grief, you chose to be kind to the world. Kind to him.

“Come,” You tell him, holding out your hand. “I want you to meet someone.” The Wanderer reaches for you and once his fingertips graze through the surface of yours, he is brought back down into the life he lived with you; moments he now holds dear. You introduce The Wanderer to your lover, the one you always spoke of to him, and they greet him with the excitement you had- thanking The Wanderer for being there for you when they weren’t. He breathes hard and forces his emotions back for your sake. Even your lover was kind enough to hold no malice against him. He knows he’s done nothing wrong, but a sense of guilt wrings deep within The Wanderer’s pit.

You’re too kind, too forgiving. If he kills you, you’d forgive him. If he kills the one you love most, you won’t forgive him. The Wanderer would never be able to live with himself carrying the knowledge that you, a person who swore to love him at his worst, would come to hate him after all. He will never forgive himself. Who was he to deserve such love anyways?

That very night, he waits until you sleep and quietly drifts off into the welcoming confines of loneliness. He doesn’t yet know the pain of one's heart being broken by someone he loves. To feel it with you, the person he least expected would hurt him, was earth-shattering. What The Wanderer does know was that he loved you. He’s given himself the chance to understand the intimacy and closeness that you had to share with someone, and even that, he cannot have. He understands that you already had it in your heart to love him, and for a while, you did. Fate had other plans and The Wanderer wishes he could alter it in a way that would favor him. But you’re happier, and that's all that matters. He’ll love you from a distance, and for now, the world is his to find peace in someone else.

Kazuha

You were a different character compared to the rest of the Crux. While they were loud, boisterous and full of energy, you were withdrawn, silent and observant- much like Kazuha. When the Crux noticed your similar personalities, they were quick to tease you both into a sort of friendship for your shared calmness. 

‘Why not.’ Kazuha thought. ‘It’s always nice to meet a new friend.’

You on the other hand felt a little awkward about the whole situation. Even when Kazuha introduced himself to you formally, you only nodded in response, looking like you didn’t want an interaction in the first place. Kazuha was confused by this. He thought that maybe he gave off a bad first impression (thanks to the crew), so he opted to find out what he did wrong.

“Nothing wrong with what you did, kid,” Captain Beidou explained. “Y/N’s been dealt a rough card. Someone they loved disappeared at sea. I don’t really think they like being out here right now.” Kazuha looks over to you, staring out into the waters, an uncertain look on your face as you try to search for something that wasn’t there. At every chance you get, Kazuha always sees you by the docks, hopeful and solemn. He thought that it was his obligation to keep you company. After all, he was grieving himself.

“I’m sorry about what happened.” Kazuha says. “It must be hard for you.” You don’t even look at him, your expression pained and distant. 

“It is.” You say. Kazuha stands with you, staring out into the horizon as you both watch the sun set out into the waves. 

“I know what it’s like. To lose someone you love.” Only then did you decide to spare a glance at the samurai. He had a small smile on his face, remembering the days when his friend was still at his side. “Won’t you tell me about them?”

You two shared stories about those who’ve gone too soon; how they made you happy, the memories you shared good and bad, and how terrible it feels to relieve yourself of the grief when it’s the only thing that made you feel close to them. At least to Kazuha, he still had his friends’ Vision. And you had nothing but shared joy and laughter with the person you still loved. It became a sort of ritual for you both to meet at the docks and reminisce about the past. Soon, your topics broadened into past adventures, families, and the lives you’ve lived before boarding the Alcor. And sooner, you found yourself smiling.

The Crux was shocked to see the entire thing unfold. They’d never seen you smile so wide before, nor laugh for that matter. But as soon as you saw Kazuha already waiting for you with a haiku in hand to recite, it seemed that happiness found itself in you. You felt unbelievably tranquil around Kazuha. His laid-back nature temporarily subdued the pain in your heart and his welcoming presence drew away your loneliness. You were genuinely happy to be around him and he made you forget your grief in those sunsets you spent with the samurai. 

Kazuha on the other hand felt himself harboring stronger feelings for you the more and more you were around. He watched you grow from this withdrawn individual into someone that cracked jokes with the crew during dinners and situated yourself as everyone told stories. His heart raced each time you ran up to him with a smile, asking him to recite a poem as you listened, eyes closed, a small smile on your lips. Before he knew it, Kazuha was in love. He wasn’t quick to try and woo you when he realized his feelings for you were stronger than he thought. He wasn’t obvious about it as you said so yourself that you only saw him as a friend Kazuha was more than understanding, albeit a little disappointed. You confide to him that you simply cannot let go of the love you had for another- another that’s gone away- and Kazuha recognized the longing in your voice mirroring his own; chasing the euphoria of the past that’s already slipped away.

In a while, you noticed that you always looked forward to the sun setting- impatiently waiting for the day to end so you could meet up with Kazuha. You felt shy around him for some reason, nervous even and Kazuha was quick to pick up on the signs. You found yourself to be more open to the idea of moving forward and brought it up to Kazuha who, in turn, was happy for you and told you not to rush about it. How long that’ll be, he’ll wait. But deep down he was excited; to finally be the one to create new memories with.

Kazuha should’ve let his hopes die down. That day, he planned to profess his love for you, to let go of the weight in his heart and finally, finally be true to himself. He waited and waited until the day would finally end. You knew for a while that his question was coming. You saw the way his smile gleamed with joy every time you came around, how his sonnets and poems dropped with passion, hinting at a romance starting to bloom. You looked forward to it, and Kazuha was more than elated to notice your enthusiasm.

However, Kazuha’s excitement was dashed when Captain Beidou introduced a new crew member. She found them floating on a raft in the middle of the sea, exhausted, worn and barely having enough energy to speak. The introduction quickly became a heartfelt reunion when you instantly recognized the new member as your lover who had supposedly died back in Inazuma. In a flash, you ran in their arms, and they found the strength to say their first word since stepping aboard.

“Y/N.” They croak, through tears and strain. “You’re okay.” Tears spilled from your eyes and your smile was the widest the Crux has ever seen.

“I could say the same for you.”

Kazuha watched the entire thing unfold- your once somber expression now comparable to the innocent giddiness of a child, your wonderful smile illuminated by the sun above, making you look more magnificent than Kazuha thought. But it wasn’t for him. It was for someone else. The crux was happy for the both of you- even Kazuha who pushed his feelings aside and met with your lover as you introduced them to him.

It was a joyous moment for the Crux that night filled with laughs and celebration- save Kazuha who only watched from a distance. You didn’t even notice him. When the cheers died down and the sun slept through the seas, Kazuha stayed down at the docks and did some thinking. That night, he stared out into the open sea and was silent. He couldn’t even try to think of anything else apart from you, how cruel coincidence could be to play with his heart that way.

It’s unfair. He thinks selfishly. It’s unfair.

He should have been the one for you, not them. You were moving on with him, you were happy- but not happier. Kazuha wanted to work that out with you. To have him be the one to shoulder your pain and soothe you through all your troubles. He’d gladly suffer over and over again if it meant he could be with you… if it meant you’d choose him.

Since then, Kazuha resorted to playing the avoidance card. Each time you tried to talk to him since that day, your conversations would be short, his answers curt and he seemed to try and have your time together end abruptly. You knew why he was acting this way, but felt it a little unfair since you had already mentioned your heart can never be swayed. Still, you felt guilt creep up your sides each time you saw him look so miserable all because you brought up the idea that you could move on. You couldn’t, you didn’t, and that shouldn’t have been your fault. Kazuha should be able to see it that way.

Late at night, you listen to the breeze whistle past the masts and there you see Kazuha, at your shared spot, staring out the somber horizon. His face was calm and unsure, a small frown on his lips. Truth be told, Kazuha was scolding himself for acting out. He hated the way he treated you, hated how his chest burned each time you walked up to him in hopes you rekindle your companionship, but he was too deep in his feelings and would snuff out any of your attempts. Kazuha wanted to be close with you still, but each time he watched you and your lover from a distance build upon your relationship as if it never ended, Kazuha couldn’t help but wish it were him instead of them.

“Hey,” you say, snapping Kazuha away from his thoughts. He looks back at you and you approach him timidly, placing yourself in the usual spot you took beside him. Kazuha only stares at you, a small, hopeful gleam in his eyes. “Can we talk?”

“Of course.” Kazuha replies, his voice airy and withdrawn. He doesn’t want to talk, not with you, not right now. Not especially when his heart is threatening to cave out of his chest. You situate yourself beside him and breathe in the calm, salty air.

“Mind telling me why you’re up here so late?” You ask. Kazuha only grips at the ship and you purse your lips at his unwillingness to talk. He was never the type to be upfront about things anyway. You almost regret coming out here with him but you knew deep down you had to apologize for something that was never in your control. Kazuha knew that you didn’t want to let go, but he can’t help but still feel betrayed.

“I’m sorry if this wasn’t what you were expecting, Kazuha.” You started. “I know that you hoped it would be different for us.” Kazuha finally looks at you, holding tightly at the edges of the ship.

“I’m just glad they’re okay,” he says, something terrible caught in his throat. “And what matters to me most is that you’re happy.” You smile lightly, placing an assuring hand over his. Kazuha bites his tongue as he looks at you- gentle eyes soft and aglow against the moon.

“And I’m sorry for the way I’ve been acting.” He says finally, voice gentle and apologetic. You only nod in response

“Can we still be friends?” You ask, hopeful and nervous. Kazuha was taken aback by this, but nevertheless returns the gesture, holding your hand in his, an assuring squeeze around it.

“Yes.” He says, unsure, quiet, but hopeful. “We can still be friends.”

Zhongli 

Zhongli, more than anyone, would know how it feels to hold onto someone you know will never return. He knows the agony of perpetually living in the past in hopes that maybe fate will be kind enough to relieve him of the burden of yearning. Alas, time does not work the way fate does. Zhongli longs for the past when time was kinder, when he and his companions had nothing to worry about. You too knew that feeling all too well.

Odd twists of fate led you to become the shadow of the person you once were. Grief was something you were never prepared for but you knew you had to be ready for it. Your lover knew the seas like the back of their hand after all- you thought you had nothing to fear given their skill. But fate had other plans and now you find yourself alone, in a cycle of empty days stretching into somber nights. That was when you met Zhongli.

Liyue’s busy nightlife isn’t particularly kind to lonely souls who wander ‘round the streets. Usually, people would be socializing after busy hours in the Harbor and would gladly kick off their boots and spend that time with others. You on the other hand longed for companionship somewhere else; in the rolling tides where the sea stretched far beyond the horizon. You were hoping for something, someone, that wasn’t coming back. You held on because you knew the seas always returned what was lost- even though it’s been too long for your lover to be considered lost still.

“Enjoying the waters?” A voice asks you, a man. He was tall, handsome, kind in disposition with gold eyes that flowed against the flicker of streetlights. That was if you cared enough to look.

“Mhm.” You reply, distracted at your own sadness to even look at Zhongli who stood by you. He stares at you for a bit, recognizing the empty hollow in your eyes- the shine taken away by something that anchored your heart in your stomach. He situates himself beside you and follows the direction you’re staring at into the open seas; your eyes are glued onto the boats, ships and ferries that floated idly amongst the waves.

“I take it that they were fond of the open waters?” Zhongli chimes. The question grabbed your attention as you finally looked at the man standing beside you. It was his turn to not return the gesture.

“Mhm.” You say sadly, head hanging low.

“My apologies, I didn’t mean to be so forward.” Zhongli says. You looked up and your eyes met- for a brief moment, Zhongli saw his years of torment in your eyes. Suffering, grief and heartache riddled your features. Then, you smile, small but genuine; Zhongli couldn’t help but grin himself.

“It’s alright, it’s nice to talk about things like this right?” You say with a small laugh. “You must be?”

“Zhongli,” The man says. “And you are?”

“Y/N.” 

Since then, you found yourself in the company of Zhongli. It was odd, what you two had; open but secretive at the same time. So called meetings with him were frequent. Always at night when the world seemed to be livelier. You either bumped into each other at the harbor or Zhongli simply invited you over to join him for a chat. Whatever it was, what you two had became a very peculiar friendship. You felt secure enough to tell Zhongli what troubled you; how days seemed to stretch on, how lonely most nights feel despite the company of others, how everything seemed to remind you of what once was. You told Zhongli you feared that you’ll live in this state of emptiness till the end of your own life, that you can never move past the strength of your love. How burdensome it was- to love like it was the only thing you had.

“Grief is a terrible thing to experience.” Zhongli says, peeking over at you from his teacup. “But the weight of your adoration for them carries far beyond your sorrow. I think that’s quite admirable.”

“I suppose.” You say. “How deep does your burden run, Zhongli? Only people in pain would know to talk about what it means to hold on.” Zhongli chuckled at your remark.

“How inquisitive.” Truth be told, Zhongli tried to find himself in you- the gravity of your emotions comparable to his. It was rare for him to see a mortal chest-deep in a memory that happened so long ago. He’s seen people move on after a few years- but not you. Even if it meant that your torment would be the only thing that came with your love, you took it wholeheartedly because atleast then, you had something of the past. Zhongli admired that about you. It reminded him of the past companions that carried the same sentiment. He’s known you through them so Zhongli only felt it fair that he began to open up about his own grief-  and you were more than willing to listen.

“The pain of loss will never falter. It comes as it pleases but it never leaves” Zhongli says. You listened to him talk so highly about the people who had gone away; the happier years when he never thought about what it would be like to lose against time. The way he spoke was captivating to you: the tremor of his baritone voice, smooth as silk and bordering on casual professionalism. You couldn’t get enough of it.

“Tell me more.” You say with interest. “About what you know.” Zhongli looks to you with delight, seeing how your expression was filled with curiosity, so vastly different from the first time he met you.

“Oh? And what would you like to know?” He asks. You shrug, staring at the man with eager eyes.

“Tell me anything.”

Since then, your topics of conversation widened into Zhongli’s most favorite domain; history. Every time Zhongli was free or off from work, he’d come visit you at your home or your usual spot down at the docks to talk. From the Archon War to the development of Liyue, Zhongli was always elated to see the eager glimmer in your eyes everytime he shared his extensive knowledge with you. He answered your inquiries, took you to historical hotspots and areas no historian has ever cataloged before. Zhongli wanted to share his life with you, unknowingly letting you step into his past and see the gravity of his grief. You listened through all of it, almost always catching the subtle hint of sadness in Zhongli’s voice each time he shared something with you, as if it was something personal and close to his heart. As if he had been there to witness it all.

“I get what you mean now,” You told Zhongli as you two walked side by side along the meadows of Jueyun Karst. 

“How do you mean?” He asks

“What you told me about grief, how it comes and goes but never leaves.” You say. Zhongli looks at you, hopeful for something you haven’t said yet. “When I’m with you, it almost seems that my grief goes away for a while.” You’re smiling at him, small but wholeheartedly sincere. Zhongli felt his chest tighten and couldn’t stop the heat that spread throughout his body as he watched you laugh at his apparent facial expression. He hopes the red on his cheeks weren’t too noticeable.

“Let’s talk more about this over a cup of tea tomorrow.” He says, coughing behind a tightly closed fist. “And then I’ll show you the Huaguang Stone Forest.” You smile softly.

“I’d like that.”

You were looking forward to seeing Zhongli that day, excited to meet with him so he could show you around different spots around Liyue and their history. You felt especially giddy when you heard a knock at your house and expected your wandering companion to be there. When you opened the door, however, you were faced by someone else. Someone familiar, a face you’ve etched deep in your memories, disheveled and sunburnt, smelling of the sea and the familiarity of home. You’re frozen, your breath caught in your airways as if you’d just seen a ghost. This time, you hoped that wasn’t the case. Eyes wide and mouth agape, the person couldn’t help but smile at you.

“I’m home.” Your lover says. You spare no second jumping into their arms- saltwater smell and all. You’re laughing, smiling, and crying at the same time. Asking questions, welcoming them back, words tumbling messily as you try and gather yourself. Your lover only smiles softly and muses at your expressions.

“I missed you so much.” They say, stroking your cheek. Only then did you begin to cry- sobs wracking your body as you sink down onto the floor as your lover follows suit, mumbling comforts and apologies in hopes to soothe your whirlwind of emotions.

From a distance, people watch the reunion with smiles on their faces. Save for one. Among the crowd, Zhongli watched you both, a bouquet of flowers native to Liyue clutched tightly in his shaking hands. He had intended to show you where each flower grows in Liyue, giving you one for each place you two would have gone together. That wouldn’t be the case now. He decides to leave you two alone, it was clear your company was already filled long before he even came into the picture.

That night, Zhongli hoped to see you at the docks, waiting for something, someone. Someone that wasn’t them, but him. But you weren’t there, and Zhongli was a bit relieved to see it. He stood by the sea and listened to the gentle waves splashing underneath him. Zhongli thought to congratulate you both and give you his well wishes in hopes to give you support- more so than he already had. Still, he can’t shake off the feeling of scorn as he watched you hand in hand with the person you loved so dearly. He shouldn’t be feeling this, after all, you loved them first. You’ve always loved them… It felt unfair to him, however, that he spent so much time with you, got to know you on an intimate level, and had high hopes that you both can find comfort in each other, and your lover just comes in and throws it all away. His effort and yours.

Zhongli can never blame you though, you loved too much for your own good, and he loved that about you as long as it’s towards him. Not someone else. He can never think to take that away from you now that you look so unbelievably happy- happier than you’ve ever been. Zhongli wasn’t the decider of fate, he knew the consequences of trying to toy with it. Still, he learned to love you, dearly. Too bad he didn’t confess his feelings quick enough. Would you still take the past back? 

“Hey.” Your voice drags him away from his spiraling thoughts, gentle like the sea. Zhongli watches you situate yourself beside him, like how he’d done the first night you two met. “I’m sorry today didn’t go as planned.”

“It’s alright,” Zhongli says, forcing back the strain in his voice. “I’m happy for you two.” 

You’re silent and so was he. You two listened to the night and Zhongli wanted so badly to leave. It was uncharacteristic of him to do so, so he just bore through the silence and pretended it’s the same one you always shared with him.

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” Zhongli whispers finally. You take his hand and he bites down at his tongue to keep himself from talking. He couldn’t stop. “I can’t help but love you still. Your hand tightens around him.

“I know you mean well, Zhongli.” You say. “And I’m sorry I can’t be the one to return it.”

Childe

‘I wish they’d just stayed dead.’ Childe thinks in the back of his mind, smiling through a false mask once you’ve introduced your lover to him- the same one you’ve told him about about- the one that should’ve been gone. Childe’s hatred only heightens when he sees your face- pure, unwavering joy as you introduced them to him, wishing that that same giddy smile as you said your lover's name would be about him.

Childe knew you through a connection of sorts with his businesses as a Fatui. You were only one of the many unaware who they were working for, thinking of Childe as another one of your business dealings. You two saw each other semi-frequently with Childe dropping in for a few shipments or to just come by and visit one of his favorite partners. You looked forward to those surprise visits of his- finding his cheery companionship soothing you through your grief. 

One morning, Childe caught you in a bad time. Your shop curtains were drawn closed, the room was dark and silent, save for your muffled sobs coming from the storage closet.

“Y/N?” Childe calls out. You sat up from your spot and in your hands were a scarf, and a photograph of someone, presumably someone you loved dearly. “Are you okay?” 

“Childe! I didn’t know you were coming.” You say, hurriedly wiping away your tears. “I’m fine, Childe, thank you.” Promptly escorting him back outside.

After that day, Childe visited your shop more often and even went out of his way to bring you gifts to cheer you up. You saw his gestures were sweet but you didn’t want to have any other relationship with Childe other than being friendly or professional. You already made it clear to him that you don’t have the intention of pursuing anything more. Curious as he was, he respected your choice. One evening, as he treated you out to a meal, his intrigue got the best of him and asked why. You fell silent.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I didn’t mean to-” 

“They were an adventurer.” You said solemnly, a small smile on your lips as you remember. “They… presumably disappeared on a trip to Sumeru.” Your nails dig into the surface of your palms and you feel tears beginning to form at the corners of your eyes. Suddenly, you feel Childe’s gloved hands above your own.

“It’s not easy to talk about it, I know.” He says. “You don’t have to say any more.

You were incredibly grateful to Childe. Not only did he somehow make your business grow, you found a genuine friendship in the Harbinger. He was patient, comforting and genuine. You felt close enough to Childe to let him see you cry on bad days when you couldn’t handle your heartache. You let him soothe you through your rants on nights when things get too stressful. Whatever it was, Childe would always be there for you. 

You thought that maybe it would be time to move on, to let your feelings from the past be something new. Something for Childe. You dropped hints at the idea, even though guilt pierces through your chest when you remember your lover. Childe never rushes you though. He wants you to be sure of your decision and you were more than grateful for his patience.

Internally, Childe counts down the days for when you finally realize your feelings for him. Even though he encourages you to take your time and allow yourself to heal of the past, he is aching for the day you would finally, finally tell him how much you love him. Until then, he waits and waits and waits. He’s determined to win over your love, whatever the case, he will get it.

That was until now.

Childe spotted you a mile away. He was happy to see you until he saw them. You were hand in hand with someone, someone he saw before. Childe stops and waits, waits for you both to approach him. When you do, he immediately recognizes the person to be the one from a photograph you had before, wearing the scarf you held onto when he saw you cry for the first time.

“Childe! I’m glad you’re here.” You say excitedly. “I have someone to introduce to you!” And indeed, it was your lover- alive and well. Childe listens to you tell stories about them. How they were found by a traveling merchant. How their recovery was a miracle and about how they took the first ship home to find you. Childe listened through it all, masking the pain and anger he felt under a warm, deceiving smile.

“We should all grab a meal together.” You suggested. Childe shakes his head and turns away, sparing a glance at you and your lover who backs away warily.

“No need, I’ll let you two catch up.”

Childe has his ways. He has connections around the world as well as Fatui. He’s quick to take action on most missions but this time, he let it happen slowly. Childe painfully watched you rekindle the flame of your past love. He watched you two kiss and hug and adore each other when it should have been him. He hated that he had to take that happiness away from you again, but he was excited about the notion that you’ll find your affections for him once more. Childe didn’t want your lover's disappearance to be suspicious after they’d just returned. He wanted it to be a tragedy, a coincidence. He didn’t want you to hate him after all. 

On one very fateful day, a surprise came to your lover when they’d been summoned for a conquest into Sumeru. You had your reservations to send your lover back out again into an adventure after what had occurred, but they were excited and you can’t take that away from them. Besides you knew in your heart that they’d return, always.

Days passed and so were you devastated once more to hear that your lover is confirmed to be dead; attacked by a Rishboland Tiger, mutilated beyond recognition and only identified by the scarf you’ve gifted them. You didn’t care how the reporter shook with anxiety as he delivered the news; you didn’t notice the word ‘ambush’ replaced with ‘attacked’ in their autopsy; you didn’t even realize that the very person who delivered the news was Fatui. You were too devastated and quick to accept pain you knew all too well. Blinded by the searing agony in your heart, you found yourself in another familiar situation in the grasp of no other than Childe. So too were you quick to throw yourself in his welcoming embrace once he got wind of what had happened. He comforted you through your reopened grief, eased you through your worries and pain and promised to be at your side for as long as it takes. He’s more patient now, he learned the best results were to wait for the right moment- and he was right. Soon, you’ll find yourself feeling the comfort of Childe’s warm meals and cheeky jokes to feel more than friendly and Childe can only smile to himself knowing that his reward was almost at his grasp.

Only almost.

Childe was too careless. He thought he already had you, but you can never betray your heart that quickly. Not again. Ever so curious and still at the grips of your hidden pain, you start skimming through some reports and information from those near the area your lover was killed, and things unknown to you make themselves clear. Locals saying how Rishboland Tigers didn’t live in that area, the wounds on your lovers’ body resembled cuts, not claw marks. The most damning thing too was that there were Fatui present in the area, long after their failed infiltration of the Akademiya. Dots began to connect and your heart only sank deeper and deeper into your stomach.

You didn’t want that to be the case. You didn’t want Childe to be the one to hurt you. It was only until you heard a creak of a floorboard and a reluctant call of your name did your blood run cold in your veins.

“So, you found out huh?” Was all Childe said. You turn to him slowly and shudder and the unforgiving cold of his stare. Uncaring, unrelenting. Just cold. 

You snapped. 

Your body shook with anger, breathing hard and fast and your eyes widening at the revelation. All you saw that moment was red. Charging at Childe, you throw the false reports at him and grab at his coat. He stares down at you, eyes dark and expression blank. Childe tries to reason with you but you strike him with the adrenaline to kill. It was only fair- he never had sympathy for you anyways.

“You’re not them,” you spit at him, once gentle demeanor now vicious and enraged. “You will NEVER be them!” With all you could muster, you shove Childe again and again, punches and kicks gradually weakening, doing nothing to the Harbinger that towered above you. Childe can only watch you berate and beat at him with worthless fury, and he can do nothing to quell the malice you had towards him. “I hate you! I HATE you!”

‘So close’ was all Childe could think of. He grabs at one of your wrists and you flinch; his jaw tightens at your quick show of fear.

“What? You’re gonna kill me too? Go ahead! Kill me!” You screech at him. Childe can never do that to you. He only wanted you for himself and now that his careless plan backfired, he’ll love the rest of his life with the guilt that he killed someone you loved and that you’ll hate him for as long as you’ll know.

“I’m sorry.” Was the only thing Childe could say before releasing his grip and turning to leave. You’re seething in silence watching the man you used to trust turn away from you. You wanted to yell at him, call him a coward, tell him to face you and admit to what he has done. But you were too weak. Instead, you could only cave and cry, screaming your agony into the ground as you felt your heart shatter once more.

Bonus! Albedo

Everyone knew why you were somber. That day, as word came that the Knights of Favonius expedition team were ambushed by Treasure Hoarders colluding with Fatui, every Mondstadtian braced themselves for the worst. You with them. As days bled on and no other update came into the city, everyone had lost hope. Except for you.

You lost the love of your life on a mission where none of the knights returned; it’s only normal for you to grieve. Everyone just presumed they were dead and felt that they had no other choice but to accept that. However, you were one of few to be unable to move on. You spent your days in silence, reminiscing about the past and reliving the grief day and night for months on end. The people of Mondstadt knew not to pressure you into moving on. They knew how much your knight in shining armor meant to you. And so, they let you process your pain at your own pace, even if that meant they saw how bad it really was. 

It was on a particularly troublesome day that you met with Chief Alchemist Albedo in his Dragonspine lab, asking about some elixir to cure your madness. You felt as though you couldn’t handle the pain of your heartache any longer. It kept you up at night, you couldn’t control your tears, everything in your life seemed to remind you about your lover. You were shambles, clearly, and you wanted your pain to cease so you can move on with your life.

“Alchemy can do no such thing,” Albedo says, never looking up from his clipboard. “I suggest you seek a doctor for that.” You sigh in defeat.

“I know, it’s silly,” you mumble, sniffling at the cold. “I guess I was just trying to be hopeful.” Albedo finally looks at you, observing your shuddering form and weary face, curious as to why you would come all this way when you know you’ll just be disappointed. He motions you inside his lab and you nod, following to sit by the fire.

“Tell me about that,” Albedo says. “About how you’re feeling.” You were a little surprised. Nobody has ever asked about how you were since the incident. You least expected that from Albedo of all people. But your emotions were overwhelming and you felt more open to talk about it.

“Do you know what happened?” You ask. Albedo hums.

“I’ve heard about it. About the missing expedition team. Was… someone of importance to you involved?” You pause for a bit and nod solemnly.

“I’ve never felt this… terrible in my life.” You whisper, burying your face in your palms as you force your tears back. Albedo felt that it would be unprofessional of him to try and understand how deeply you feel on a hypothetical level, so he tries his best to comfort you. It’s the least he could do for not having what you came for.

“Has it always been this bad?” He asks.

“No, not always. Some days it’s manageable but most days. I don’t even want to get up anymore.” Your voice trembles as you speak. You feel Albedo’s curious eyes stare you down and you don’t look up, fearing judgment. But when you take a glance, Albedo only looks at you with patience- like every other Mondstadtian that’s witnessed your pain.

“I don’t know how to word this properly, Y/N but, the pain will be gone eventually.” Albedo says. You shake your head

“My pain is the only thing I have left of them. If I move on, what else would I have?”

Albedo didn’t understand it then; you had your memories, pictures, even memorabilia you two had collected together. Why burden yourself and hold onto the pain? He didn’t understand how deeply you truly loved. Maybe if you showed him how, he’ll know.

Albedo originally intended to study your feelings as a means to understand the complications of the emotional spectrum people had. You were his best candidate; you cried, you grieved and at the same time, you laughed and you smiled. It was fascinating to him watching this spectrum unfold in front of him in varying degrees, and before you knew it, you were acquainted with the Chief Alchemist.

He approached you first. After your first meeting, you found yourself with Timaeus and Sucrose a lot- even more so with Albedo. He told you he wanted to conduct a study of sorts- to figure out if there would be a cure for your ‘ailment’. You were a little hesitant at the idea but nevertheless enjoyed the company the Alchemists’ shared with you- it gave you a semblance of normalcy after locking yourself up for so long. 

You liked being around Albedo; his calming disposition made it difficult for you to even think about your sorrow when he’s around. Apart from his usual studies, Albedo let you in on his life when he wasn’t associated with Alchemy. He was incredibly talented when he drew, he was a great cook and an especially kind individual. You were fond of the memories you shared with the Alchemist and slowly saw that his company was enough to soothe you of your grief for a while. Besides, Klee made sure you were never down when she’s around you.

“Fascinating,” Albedo chimes, jotting things down into his clipboard. “It seems that your mood has elevated significantly. Maybe it’s the atmosphere.” The two of you ventured out into Windrise to collect Crystalfly Cores. Albedo thought that the activity would be fun and it was a step for you to ‘broaden your horizons’ as he put it.

“You think so?” You laugh, jumping down from a branch. “That’s good, right?” You land in front of Albedo, a Crystalfly Core in your palm. You’re looking down at it proudly, smiling at your little achievement with a faint glimmer in your eyes as you present Albedo your catch. As he stares at you, something leaps from his stomach; a spring or a jolt that makes his skin prickle with heat. His mouth dries at the sight of you looking so carefree in contrast to the day he first saw you. It was a massive improvement and Albedo couldn’t help but smile at your joy.

“It’s great.”

The next morning, Albedo felt especially giddy. He dropped by Flora’s shop and purchased a handful of Cecilia’s. He never made it clear what (or who) it was for but everyone knew the purpose of them. They were too late to tell him the news. Albedo planned to visit you and talk. He wanted to talk about his feelings, make it clear that the past few weeks were not of research, but he genuinely felt drawn to you. Albedo wanted to be closer to you, have your relationship progress to the next phase. Albedo hoped that maybe he could be the remedy to your grief.

As he braces himself to see you, he is instead greeted by immense disappointment.

“Albedo! I didn’t expect you to visit.” You say, standing up from your seat. Across from you was a Knight, disheveled, dressed in a worn down suit of armor. Your hands were in theirs and you had no intention of letting them go. He looks at you and back at the knight, understanding the situation once he sees the sparkle in your eyes, the small smile on your lips. Your gaze glowed with something he’s never seen before when you spent time together, your aura seeming lighter as soon as he entered, and the inflection of your tone indicating how truly excited you were. Not because he was there, but because of the person before him. Gripping the bouquet tightly, Albedo feels something terrible writhe in his stomach, something you’ve described to him before; something awful and guttural. He feels as though he might vomit from the sensation. Shakily, he tucks the Cecilia flowers away into his coat and forces himself to speak.

“My apologies,” He starts, looking down as he closes your door. “I’ll leave you alone.”

Albedo hoped that by some miracle, you’d call him to come back. But it’s quiet, and Albedo walks alone with the wish still stuck in his mind.

He trudges back up into his lab completely silent. He doesn’t bother to savor his surroundings on such a beautiful day. To you, maybe it was, but to him, the world seemed to laugh at his face. Albedo felt humiliated. He thought that maybe he’d have a chance at being your significant other once you’ve moved on, that maybe he can experience the deep, unwavering passion you had when you loved. Now, he laughs at the idea that you’ll choose him over your lover when he had never been a choice in the first place.

Setting down the bouquet on his desk, Albedo picks up his notes and begins to drown himself in his work. It’s better to distract himself from the pain than to let it fester anyways. He won’t try to find a cure now; he knows through you that this feeling will be the only thing he would have of you. Good or bad, he didn’t care- as long as it meant it resembled something you made him feel.

“Hello? Is anyone there?” Someone asks, their footsteps drawing closer. Albedo turns and meets with the gaze of the Knight from your house, your lover. He stops in his tracks and his stomach drops when he sees them. It would have been worse if it were you even if it meant his wish for you to chase him would come true.

“You must be Albedo. I heard about you from Y/N,” The knight says, shaking off the snow from their shoulders. They smile at Albedo kindly and he only returns with a curt nod. “I don’t think you’ve heard but the expedition team made it back and now we’ve reunited.” Albedo looks down and turns away, his grip on his notes tightening as he speaks.

“I see,” he mumbles. “I’m happy for you two.” The silence between them almost felt suffocating. Albedo was grateful for the eerie whisper of the snow but it wasn’t loud enough to drown out the question the Knight asked next.

“Did you have feelings for Y/N?” They ask. Albedo flinches but nevertheless stays calm. His skin grows hot and his heart races in his chest, all the while he trembles from the horrible sensation that boils in his stomach.

“Insightful are we?” Albedo says matter-of-factly. Your lover sighs. 

“You can tell me if you liked them, Chief. I won’t be mad.” They say with a chuckle. “I won’t be surprised actually. They’re wonderful.” Albedo only hums in response, pretending to write something down on his notes. You really were wonderful, but he will never say that out loud, not especially in front of them. Your lover shifts awkwardly and Albedo expects them to go, but they move closer and place a hand on his shoulder.

“For what it’s worth, thanks for taking care of them.” your lover says, smiling lightly before turning to leave. The corner of Albedo’s lips twitch into a frown. As he watches the knight fade off into the path, Albedo sets his notepad down, tracing the outline of a sketch with his delicate fingers. It was a drawing of you, under the oak tree in Windrise, the life in your eyes glowing as he remembers it. Albedo reminisces the days when your relationship with him grew into what it was and plateaued in the blink of an eye. He’d imagined what it would be like to be loved by you; so incredibly dedicated and genuine. You loved too much for your own good and Albedo admired that about you. He could only wish that that love were for him.

“I’ll do anything for Y/N.”

[treeashhere]

I will admit I was pretty confused for a few moments but don't worry! This genius brain never fails me to write this! So here you go!! And this has to be one of the longest fanfic ever! @harukisakisblog

SPOILERS FOR ALL THE GAMES

TW: SU1C1D3 M3NT1ON.

BIG BIG BIG SPOILERS SO DONT.

Meeting him in the classroom, you obviously made the move by waving at him while this guy was just shocked on how someone literally waved at him in the corner of the classroom.

Though it doesn't stop there when everyone started to panic on how the hell did the classroom turned into a beach- you tried to get them to stay calm as possible, somehow it does works!.. well for some people.

He was clearly astonished with this, But when Hajime fainted, You rushed to his aid, letting him lay down in your lap. Seeing this made him smile at your actions.

Nagito did noticed that you seem to be wanting to help people even in the slightest needs, wanting to comfort them because of this Killing Game just made him so happy.

Time skip through where they finished the trial, Nagito's true colors shown, everyone started despising him and his actions while you? You wanted to help him with his needs!

Though there was something that Nagito would never forget that one moment from you. The way you encourage them, the way you made them feel safer with your presence.

Was he.. really dreaming? Are you really the Ultimat—

...

When they all figured out where Nagito was kept hidden, because of the blurt Kazuichi and Nekomaru did, you then wanted to take care of him, he was gonna be sick and.. probably die due to starvation.

The next scene where you have the plate of food in your hands, ready to feed him this and maybe even try to talk to him to make himself comfortable. He was clearly and visibly amazed with this.

You? Wanting to help someone like him?! That's too much for him to handle!

As you two have gotten close afterwards, he does noticed that whenever your presence was here, the mood will suddenly lift up as they've started to forget this Killing Game.

It was like, the trip that Monomi planned a few days ago!

At this point, Nagito finally realized.. Maybe you are the Ultimate Hope! The Ultimates of all Ultimates!

The fact that he was literally breathing in the same air with you just disgusts him. But that doesn't stop you from wanting to spend time with him.

But deep down below, Monokuma was enraged.. No. Junko was furious, even if it despaired her, the plan wasn't working out! The plan that her creator has made for a few long months or even years!

And that's because of.. You.

You...

You were the whole problem on why.

...If only she could get rid of you.. can she?

"Stupid little S/O. If only you weren't this innocent Saint wanna be, you would've have been alive. I knew that you were gonna foil this plan the moment you've step foot in this place. Oh well~! If you're their hope, Then I wonder what would happen if their hope is gone..~"

Thus, she made a beloved case about your death, framing one of their allies.

When the announcement arrived, Nagito walks through the scene as he saw your body, dangling from the ceiling as if you've committed...

No way.. there's no way..!?

How did he let this happen!? It must've his luck huh?

He blames himself, if only he hadn't stick around with you, then you would've been...

Hah.. if only he knows that all of this was just a part of a plan to make it all succeeds in the end.

Or will it?

Hah! When you two meet he just thought that you're just boring girl who's naive on what is going on.

I mean, at first glance, he kinda knew you're that one girl who'll kept on babbling about optimistic things.

And that kinda proves his point that you tried talking to him in the niceliest way. And to be honest with you, he was super annoyed.

Especially in the place like this, the killing game, do you honestly think a small talk like that will make him go swoon on you? You'll have to do harder than that.

Definitely hardest to approach on since he's..

"Hmmmmmmmmm? You want to be friends with me?" .... "Nishishi! You do realize that you're gonna killed if you tried to befriend everyone riiiiiiight?~"

Yeaaah, it'd took a while for him to soften up to you but if ever by a fucking miracle that he did soften up to you (ngl in this situation, I don't think so but hhhh)

Bro, he'll be clingy af.

But it doesn't still remove the fact that he is annoyed with your optimistic hopeful attitude! It's just ugh. Eh, he kinda do respect you for trying though.

Though he did notice that whenever you're around, peoples mood will always lighten up, even helping them with the problem you didn't have to care.

I guess you could say he was relief that no one is having the intention of doing it.. but that didn't stop him from being doubtful.

When Tsumugi notices that everyone started to liven up, maybe even accepting since their bonds are way much stronger than those petty motives.

She knew it was your turn to die.

So obviously, she of course knew Kaede's plan about her trying to kill the mastermind, so she decided to just.. let you die in the place of Rantaro.

I mean, it was your own fault anyway. You had your chances of winning but you've just gambled it away.

When Kokichi run up to see who died, seeing your lifeless body in the side of the bookcase, he was shocked.

Of course he knew you'll die but this quick?

He was a liar so he just acted as if he didn't care but, he was really saddened that someone who could only understand him just faded away from the blink of an eye.

That's where he knew..

No one really could be trusted in this place of a hellhole. Ever.

Ah, Makoto.

To be honest, when the killing game was announced, the people.. well obviously we're freaking out.. except some of them.

Though, when you tried lightening up the mood, lifting up their spirits, Makoto appreciates you for doing that. He really needs.. no, everyone needed that some sort of reassurance.

Many people did agree with you, along with him of course and not gonna lie, they were really thankful for you for being there. Makoto isn't even sure what would happen if you're not even here.

In that even moment, you even tried talking to "Junko" to not be reckless about it, not wanting her to get harm she tried to reason out with you but you insisted.

As soon as that happened it felt like no motive was gonna work for them.

Which made Junko so mad.

Not only was she planning to kill Mukuro for despair, you stopped her from doing that, which caused her to be mad, furious, and even despaired about it.

Focusing on Makoto, he was glad that you're on his side even of what's happening. Of course its no problem to you, you wanted to help him!

"... But really, I'm thankful for your help." He said, closing his eyes with a relieved smile in his face when you smiled back at him in reassurance.

Him with your presence somehow made him feel.. comfort. It was really nice to have a company from time and time again.

Oh boy, When Monokuma made another announcement with a motive, everyone started denying it, not wanting to get any part of this but the motive was about everyone's loved one.

Which made everyone panicked, especially Makoto and Sayaka.

That's where "Junko" confronted Monokuma with a confidence sass, really ain't taking the motive so well, full of deny about it.

You tried to stopped her but before you knew,she was impaled.

And that's where the killing game really starts.

You were actually scared even if you tried to make it seem that you're not affected by it, and Makoto then tried to comfort you like you did to him.

Little did you know, Junko already planned to killing you herself and make it look like a suicide. Mukuro's death was just a step one for her real plan.

With that, she wore a mask and makes it think that you were depressed, making a suicide note, noose in the ceiling along with every proofs to make your death, suicide.

....

The monokuma body announcement then came on.

Makoto was shocked on who got killed.. and there he saw you.. no not just him.. everyone saw you. Just hanging from the ceiling with a disturbing face your face was shown.

Makoto was really sad after what happened, and after Sayaka? He felt like he have no one to trust anymore

Was there?

[depths-of-your-soul]

S/o who's obssessed with fictional characters

Genre: Fluff

Pair: Izuku Midoriya x reader

Notes: Wheeeeeeeeeeeee :D I wrote something! °^° @harukisakisblog I hope you like it!

• Boi would at first not mind

• He loves you so he likes seeing you smile

• I mean, he IS a nerd himself, so what could go wrong?

• So he let you indulge with your favourite characters' merch a lot

• But when he forgot to bring you something one time, he received cold shoulder from you

• :( "Do you hate me now?"

• The amount of time he spent sulking :((

• So he worked harder, thinking, "This must be what everyone does!"

• Nononononooooo

• Whenever you ignored him, he would feel so worthless ómò

• But your classmates were starting to worry so they talked to Deku and adviced him  (because girl, you'be getting too obssessed)

• So babey mustered up his courage to talk to you about it >:((

• C'mon, stop being such a brat! He only wants to spend time with you!!

• You'd better comply or I'm coming after you ònó

• HE IS DETERMINED!

• He won't stand not being able to spend time with you just because of some fictional character that is apparently,

• "sO cUtE!1!!11 He iS SHOooOo aDoRabLe!1"

• No one is cuter than him òmó

• When you finally give in though, he will shower you with so much affection that you can't ever think about other guys/girls/other pals

As he wraps his arms around you in bed, he pulls you towards him. He places his forehead ontop of you chest, relishing this sweet scent of yours that he oh, so wishes. He will pepper you with kisses, hugs, cute words and so much more that even your classmates are starting to think they mad ethe wrong choice. Cue Bakugou cursing a chain of rainbows at how idiotic you both are.