#he doesn't play with other dogs. he doesn't bite at them he just doesn't engage

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

imagine it's winter and you're driving down a country road when you hit someone with your car. you hit the breaks and get out while freaking tf out only to see you hit a dog. seeing it's still breathing, you get it into your car and drive to the nearest vet. the next morning, you take home your new dog. a few weeks later, you start suspecting someone is secretly living in your home.

(you just got yourself a werewolf)

[crplpunkklavier]

thoughts on vongole, and kristoph as a dog owner

DISCLAIMER: i am not a professional in dog care nor training. i have had and trained a dog for many years now, but he is not a retriever. i've studied up on other breeds out of curiosity (and due diligence tbh). if anything i say here is factually wrong and you know more, feel free to reach out!

Kristoph: Ah, yes, she's surprisingly delicate, you know. Requires careful tending. But, she is my "best friend", as they say. Phoenix: "Best"...? Come on, now I'm starting to feel bad for you. Kristoph: Oh? Of course, she's known to bite if handled roughly. Phoenix: Y-Your rose bites? Kristoph: ...... I was speaking of the photo next to the rose. My retriever, Vongole. Cute, but feisty.

this is all we ever learn about vongole. am i going crazy about it? maybe. (also, after this line, phoenix thinks to himself, "every dog has its thorn..." as if that means literally anything. i love him so)

vongole is one of my favorite mysteries about kristoph. she is not at all relevant in aa4, and if she was only ever going to be in this tiny bit of flavor text (so easily missable too!) why put her in at all? was she going to play a bigger role in a later game that shu takumi never got to bless us with? i guess it's possible. that would lift vongole on the same level as those pesky black psyche locks. but either way, we have her here, and that means i get to overanalyze her :)

or more accurately, i get to overanalyze kristoph gavin on the basis that he has a dog who

is a retriever

is "surprisingly delicate"

requires careful tending

is his best friend, as they say

bites if handled roughly

hey. what the fuck does any of that mean, kris?

lets start with the breed. i've mentioned in a post before that many of us seem to have collectively decided that vongole is a golden retriever, which seems fitting, since those are famous blondes, just like the other gavins. however, "retriever" doesn't automatically mean golden retriever! there are a few other retriever breeds. you're probably familiar with labrador retrievers, for instance. i have a curly-coated retriever in my neighborhood who, you guessed it, has a charming curly coat, pitch black, and is a trained service dog!

we often see retrievers as service dogs, because they're pretty fit for the job. the name retriever comes from hunting though. while my own dog is more engaged in actually running ahead and killing prey himself (no i don't let him do that.), retrievers have been bred to go and, well, retrieve prey for the hunters. this of course means that you can also teach them to retrieve other stuff for you fairly easily. like meds, socks, blankets -- stuff a service dog would be helpful for.

apart from that, retrievers are also known to be good family dogs, because they're friendly, affectionate, loyal, and quick to trust. they're also very active, and pretty smart! there are minor differences between the various retriever breeds, but this much goes for all of them to some extent.

why in the world does kristoph have a dog?

i... just..... does he seem like a dog person to you?? i just.... i mean, he doesn't seem like a cat person to me either. or a plant person. maybe he doesn't seem like a person to me. i just really stumble over this sometimes, because it seems wild to me to think that kristoph gavin got himself a retriever just because he.... wanted a retriever?

the guy works what's pretty much an office job. his salary shouldn't be very high, as a defense attorney? but, well, he's implied to like high-profile cases, and he had the money to employ an assistant, so i don't think he's poor. he needs time and space for a retriever, though. vongole isn't a little shih tzu who's happy to just hang out on your lap all day. again, REALLY active. this is a dog who wants AT LEAST an hour of outside time a day. kristoph gavin doesn't even look like he's ever seen the sun. but ok.

one frankly hilarious route i've considered is that he wanted a dog for protection. klavier says he's been "living in fear" ever since zak gramarye disappeared on him, and then he panicked enough to straight up beat him to death the minute he saw him again seven years later. he's paranoid, he's spying on everyone involved. i think kristoph really was very scared. so maybe at some point he figured he'd get himself a dog that would protect him from assailants.

i say this is hilarious because..... a retriever is not the dog you want, man. like, yeah, she'll be loyal to you if she likes you. the problem is she is also really quick to like you, or the intruder in your house, or the guy coming to your office to kill you. if kris got a retriever because he wanted a guard dog, that was a fantastic bit of stupidity, and i personally love it for him.

another angle i like, one that makes him a little less stupid and a little more horrifying, is appearances.

But, she is my "best friend", as they say.

this line really does something to my brain. kristoph gavin talks like a law text book at the best of times, so the somewhat awkward wording of it isn't really what's bothering me. it's the fact that he said it at all. it's that very last part. the "as they say." because, yeah, sure, people say that. yeah yeah, man's best friend, we've all seen it.

and it just... seems so very kristoph to latch onto a truism about human beings, to make himself look like one. look at him! he's got a suit, he's got a job. he's totally on speaking terms with his brother. when the bar association voted to disbar phoenix, he was the only one who voted against that (one more thing i'd love to make a big post about one day lol), he has regular dinner with his good friend phoenix wright, he has an assitant, he has a law office. he probably has a car, because it's LA. he has a savings account. that's not, like, canon, but he does. of course he also has a dog. he's just a regular human guy! he likes poetry and the arts. his best friend is a dog, and more than that, a breed which is known for its gentleness, and for how great they are with..... children :)

let's all sit back and let that chill go down our spine for a sec.

kristoph got a retriever to prove something. kristoph got a retriever for the same reason that he made friends with vera misham before he tried to kill her.

remember what his prison cell looks like? with the books, the arm chair, the violin? he keeps up appearances, even after his arrest. of course he'd put up a framed picture of his beloved dog. like any normal human person would.

but did he treat her well?

well...... well.

here's the thing.

i don't think kristoph gavin is an animal abuser. i don't think he treated her badly. but that's a sliding scale, with dogs, and with most pets, isn't it? if i'm never outright mean or violent to my dog, that's great, but if i never give him enrichment, if i never learn to read his body language, if i never give him what he fundamentally needs as a certain animal of a certain breed, i'm still not treating him well. i'm not treating him right, i'm just not overtly torturing him.

back to kristoph. in this vein, i often think about what we hear of his interactions with young vera. one thing that particularly sticks out to me is how drew misham says that kristoph was one of the very few people who ever made her smile.

kristoph clearly has a way with children, to an extent. he knows to get her that stamp -- he actually understands her childish fascination with magic a little too well and gets her a present that she likes so much it thwarts his whole plan. keep in mind that vera was 12 -- when kristoph's younger brother was 12, kristoph was 19 already, old enough to consciously learn things about the 12-year-old in his household. he knows kids, and he gets through to them.

but never fully, does he? klavier figured out something was off about the way his brother came to his office. and even vera, despite smiling at kristoph so earnestly, despite really loving that stamp, despite being only 12, even vera was so horrified by that little twitch of the devil's hand. there was always something uncanny about kristoph.

why am i bringing that up? i'm not saying everyone who's good with children will be good with dogs, or the other way around. but there is common ground. you're dealing with a living thing that's smaller than you, dependent on you, and you're building a relationship that'll take a lot of calmness, understanding, and reassurance. kids often can't express themselves in ways adults would immediately understand, and neither can dogs.

and i think kristoph got about as far with vongole as he did with vera. i think vongole liked him fine. again, retrievers are quick to like people. he was there, he fed her, he probably gave up trying not to let her up on the couch. sure she liked him. but did she listen to him?

before i ever had a dog, my mom used to tell me that she thought the concept of dog training (the german word is Hundeschule, so literally "dog school") was stupid, that she'd had a dog as a kid, and that dog didn't have to know any tricks, it wasn't a circus animal! well, my mom was also bad with every pet we've ever had, and with all three of her kids. so.

look, it's important that your dog listens to you. i'm just saying. no, it doesn't have to know "circus tricks," although depending on the breed, it might have fun learning them! and it definitely just. it needs the basics. your dog needs to understand what "no" means, and your dog should come when called -- i know we're all tired of alpha terminology and it's constantly used wrong, but, genuinely, your dog needs to know that you're the leader of the pack. your dog needs that, it's good for the dog. turns out i was also using it wrong! this reblog explains what i meant to say better than i could. my point was that you have got to give your dog something, some form of structure. for the dog's own cognitive development, for you to work as a union, and last but not least to make sure you don't bring harm to the outside world!

and, yeah, this is absolutely the part where i think kristoph failed. because no, i don't think he was ever violent with her or anything, but i also don't think he would ever have the patience it takes for solid dog training.

why else does he, unprompted, bring up that she is "surprisingly" delicate, and requires "careful" tending? kris, did you not know? why are you surprised by how delicate a literal living thing is? did you accidentally step on her paw and she acted like it's the end of the world? yeah, they do that. did you come home late from the office one night and there was a pile of poop on your overturned laundry basket? hmm. if only something could be done about that.

the "bite if handled roughly" part is the last one i wanna talk about, because that also gave me a lot of trouble.

i mean... dogs bite. they do! mine bites. especially puppies are happy to play-bite, often into hands, and it's important to get that under control while they're young. this also loops us all the way back around to vongole being a retriever. remember, they're bred to carry stuff in their mouths. it is in this dog's dna to use her mouth for stuff.

this means she might be bite-happy in a very specific way. i've actually read multiple times that retriever bites are "soft", because again, they're just supposed to retrieve game when hunting, not kill it themselves. it's already dead, and a dog actually biting into it would make it yucky for humans to eat. retrievers are good at moderating bite strength for that.

but.... it doesn't sound like that's what kristoph is talking about, is it? she's known to bite if handled roughly. that sounds like she really bites. and of course she does. if handled roughly. hey, what the fuck does that mean, handled roughly? who's handling her roughly?

again, this doesn't necessarily scream animal abuse. as @mlmschemes, out of professional experience, has brought up, there are certain things that need to be done during a vet visit that dogs don't always love, especially if they aren't used to it, like nail trims, to state the easiest one. you might have to hold a dog down for that. and if that dog is trained and socialized like ass, yeah, she'll bite if handled roughly.

but, hey, don't worry. she's just feisty. :) cute but feisty, he says.

just like every fucking dog owner i've ever met in the neighborhood who has a half-rabid untrained menace that would probably tear my face from my skull if not for its stupid retractable leash.

anyway.

kristoph wants to be a dog owner because it's a fun normal human thing to do and makes him look non-threatening, well-adjusted, and generally likeable. but he sucks at dog training. nobody has ever fully believed the guy--fucking, even apollo IMMEDIATELY deserts him in court. kristoph lives a superficial life and vongole probably has zero trouble becoming the best friend of whoever gets her next.

just to bring this already embarrassingly long post to a point and an end, here's some quick tips from me for portraying vongole, and by extension kristoph dealing with her:

retrievers are affectionate, so vongole is probably a cuddler

kristoph probably has fur fucking everywhere. he comes into the office with a briefcase thats just filled with lint rollers

vongole knows exactly zero commands. if you have food in your hand, she will sit down, because sometimes that gets her things, and she will try to use it at every possible opportunity

if sitting down doesn't work, she will become more and more annoying. if my dog felt like i wasn't giving him enough attention, he used to walk up to my desk and nudge my forearm with his nose so strongly that my grip on my computer mouse would slip and i would fuck up whatever i was working on.

kristoph loses patience with her. it'd be interesting to write, because he'd want to save face if it happens in public, too. he can't yell at his dog there, that'd look bad. i imagine a lot of insistent leash tugging, a lot of ill-advised grabbing/holding her (here's where he probably gets bitten too), and a lot of smiling and laughing and being like "ohh, haha, she's just so feisty today, what's going on ooo she's so nice normally haha"

i doubt he played much with her? she probably had toys, but for kristoph to interact with them a lot.... you can play fetch with retrievers pretty well, because, once again, they're retrievers. and that's a pretty classic "look at me i'm a normal dog owner" thing to do, so he probably has some like, tennis balls and stuff that he'd throw for her. but that's probably it.

if you write vongole changing owners to klavier and/or apollo, please please please let her do a full 180. if you're going by what i've theorized here vis à vis kristoph, that dog is DESPERATE to learn. dogs want jobs and she would be SOOO happy to be trained.

forget that thing about old dogs and new tricks. my dog is 8 years old and i'm currently teaching him a new command, for funsies. it's working and he loves it. you can write vongole becoming a model citizen at any age. i implore you to.

[mountswhore]

Hi, can you write prompt 34 from the little one list for mason? Thank you so much love your writings a lot 💕

𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐞 — mason mount

summary: your daughter, callie, has been teething, and it had been hell for the both of you.

notes: requests are OPEN.

34. Little one biting everything they can stick in their mouth as they teethe.

"Ouch!" Mason yelped, pulling his hand away from his daughter's mouth and frowning as he looked down at it. Callie had reached the fateful age of one and was teething terribly. You and Mason were prepared, buying toys for her to chew on, and making sure to generally keep your fingers away from her mouth. But sometimes it was near impossible.

Mason had woken up early, promising you a lie in and went to wake Callie up. She'd bitten his shoulder as he walked downstairs with her, causing him to let out a little hiss. Of course, looking at his face, she thought it was hilarious and assumed it was okay to keep biting. She'd gotten over the crying and the general aching gums of her teeth coming in, and now she was like a rabid dog.

"Cal," Mason whined, seeing the small indents in his hand, "naughty, look what you did to daddy's hand." Callie looked down at the hand in front of her, grabbing it gently, before pulling it to her mouth and biting him once again.

"We need to get you a muzzle." Mason commented under his breath, leaving his daughter in the high chair and going to find an ice pack.

"Is she still biting?" You asked, yawning and walking down the stairs, greeting your little angel who was giggling in the highchair. Mason had returned to sit beside Callie and had given you a kiss on your head, whilst tending to his bite mark.

"Why doesn't she bite you as much as she bites me?" Mason questioned, staring down at his daughter who was fiddling with the engagement ring on your finger. She often did that when you were holding her, it kept her quiet wherever you'd go.

It was true, Callie rarely bit you. She only did it twice when she was crying in pain, and you just gave her some calpol and settled her down. It was still a mystery why she would always attack Mason's skin.

You had lifted Callie from her chair, cuddling her against your chest as you made a shopping list with Mason. He had written a long list of food items in his notes, as you needed to go shopping later in the afternoon. Callie had been well-behaved, up until that point. She was affectionate with Mason, which he'd assumed was an apology from her.

The moment Mason had put her into the kid's seat of the trolley, she had become a shark. As you were picking things up and putting them in the trolley, and crossing them off from Mason's phone, Callie was playing whack-a-mole with Mason's hands. She would bring her head down to nibble at his fingers, Mason receiving strange looks from other shoppers as he whimpered in pain.

"Meanie," Mason whispered to his daughter, peering into the trolley to find your bag. He knew you always took her teething toys with you, and grabbing the donut looking toy, handing it to Callie and smiling. But within minutes, she'd grown bored of it and kept throwing it at Mason's chest.

"What is it that you want, hm? Are you hungry?" Mason questioned his daughter, rubbing her cheeks with his thumbs and looking at the contents inside the trolley again. A lot of little snacks for Callie.

He had opened a box of yoghurts, twisting the cap and giving it to her. She had held onto it, and she was perfectly behaved. Despite eating breakfast in the morning, and stopping for lunch before coming to Tesco, she was still hungry. But she was quiet, and not biting anyone or anything, that was all that mattered.

[mgsapphire]

Ethics and morality... and how they're not the same...

Weird title, and I don't even know if I'll properly approach this one with all the topics I wish to this discuss in today's The Devil Judge essay, because a lot of things peaked my interest, I was debating on doing a separate post for each subject, but I'll do them all in here:

Starting simple

I know we're only 4 episodes in, but I want to break down the things that I often look for in a new show:

Cinematography

Soundtrack

Character building

Plot devices

Social commentary (sometimes)

Of course, these are things most people would consider basics, but I find that a lot of TV shows don't have enough balance in them. Also, cinematography and soundtrack are pretty up there for me because when a plot gets slow, or something like that, I stay for those two (biggest example: King Eternal Monarch).

The soundtrack in The Devil Judge is amazing and the cinematography can be a character of its own. They really get me hooked and are used as tools to properly tell a story. And I'll get into that further down this post.

The onlooker will never understand the actor

Experience is your best friend not only applies to job hunting, but it's true in the real world too. You can't truly weigh in on something unless you've experienced it yourself, you can give it your judgment and everything, but when bad things happen to someone, you'll never truly understand their pain. Am I bringing up because of the difference of mind in Judge Kang and Judge Kim's opinions? On how the public treated the minister's son? No. I'm talking about a very specific scene, where the cinematography told me to think that way and not the dialogue (it's that easy for my mind to be swayed). In episode 3, when the rich are about to dine right after the foundation's commercial for a better future, we see this aerial shot:

What's interesting about this? The seclusion and the enclosed feeling it conveys as a counterpart to the poverty shots we were just shown. Yet, these are the people making ads for a better future, what do they know?

They live comfortably behind concrete walls with no windows to see what goes on apart from the bubble they live in. This idea is further enforced at the party in episode 4, where they're not even a part of the donations, and watch and mock from afar as spectators. Yet, these people call the shots. They even call it commenting, as if they were watching the pain of others on TV.

The intriguing personality and the duality it encites

Now, this was a costume and wardrobe decision, but it was also very well thought of:

Judge Kim wears white and Judge Kang wears black. One is morally perceived by viewers of the show as morally good and the other is perceived as morally dubious at best. However, besides the costume and wardrobe thought put into this, we also have to think about the delivery of this scene and how it may further affect my detailing of this section. Judge Kang brings down the coats, and hangs over the coat to Judge Kim, he's the one who is making that annotation: You're pure, I'm tainted. This can have one of two interpretations:

Either Judge Kang believes Judge Kim to be pure and innocent due to his status as a rookie in the field

Or he believes Judge Kim to be morally white and himself morally black as he's looking at his brother's face and not at Judge Kim's heart.

Because most of the back story we're unveiling is through Judge Kim's perception, there's also an inherit bias we're having as well, because in Judge Kim narrative, he believes he's doing what's right and believes Judge Kang to be evil. In being served information about Judge Kang through Judge Kim's eyes, our bias is inherently skewed.

Another thing is that, when they put on the coat, they're standing in front of the other, as if the producers of this series are telling us they're two sides of the same coin.

The duality is made in more deceitful ways, which include:

A difference of classes that implies one has suffered while the other has not.

A difference of experience that implies one is more tainted while the other is pure.

A difference of age that implies one is a sly fox while the other one is is bunny about to be eaten.

A difference of temper that makes one erratic and the other logical.

Power dynamics

This one, in this one I could make a whole thesis based on just a couple of scenes in the drama. And you know I have to mention it: director Jung being the puppeteer.

It may not be as unexpected at first, nevertheless it brings forward a lot of things I've wished to touch upon for quite some time now. A woman being a puppeteer of an old man in the portrayed dystopia that The Devil Judge is painting makes much more sense than more common demonstrations of these dynamics where it's either a:

A man of power being controlled by a bigger man of power.

A man of power being controlled by a seemingly man of a lower status.

A woman being controlled by a man of power.

Although, there's nothing wrong with those power dynamics, and if they were to be used, a message could also be conveyed, this one in particular works as a megaphone.

A subversion of power in such a way can be interpreted as a true indication of the weak overcoming the powerful. Why? It is not that woman are naturally weaker than men, but that in society, patriarchy has been a big factor in taking voice away from women in order to give it to men.

In order for Director Jung to achieve her purposes, it's smarter for her to do it under the pretense that an old rich man in power is the one calling the shots.

This is better exemplified by her stance when the old man tries to excuse his behavior, and what her moral compass is. I'm not saying I agree with her unethical conduct, but that her morality is directly impacted by the perception of the public of her as a weak woman:

Just because a dog bites a human does the person get dirty?

This is telling on how she perceives the actions of the old man in gropping the waitress. She didn't do anything wrong, even if you touched her, you are the dirty one.

While she's evil, it's a refreshing and deep evil.

The public's opinion and how there's actually logic in the show's portrayal

The public opinion can make or break a person, even if it's not on a public trial like this. While "cancel culture" barely works in today's society, a person's reputation is forever tainted. The show does tell that, but it also exhibits the scary downside of it, by showing how easily it was to make people accept flaggelation as a fitting punishment.

There are many experiments that have tried to test the effect of societal pressure on an individual's decision and the effect of the authority's enforcement of power in the outcome of these decisions. Furthermore, theories based on analysis of human behavior not necessarily relying on experiments can also help break this down. What do I mean? Here's a small attempt at explaining:

Milgram Experiment on Authority: which measured the individual willingness to carry out actions that go against their conscience due to an authority's approval.

Argument from Authority; The idea that people are more likely to use an authority's opinion on something as an argument for their reason. This is often seen in science, where trusted authorities have done the research and offer it to the public. In here, authority bias also plays a role, as we often believe, at first, that an authority must be right.

Moral disengagement: basically speaking, because this is evil or bad, I'm not part of it and I most probably am not actively participating in it. One may disengage by moral justification, which means that before engaging in something that has been previously perceived as immoral, I'm changing my stance on it based on what I tell myself to be logical arguments. This particular form of moral disengagement is very effective in changing the public opinion. I'll be touching on another form further down this post.

Other factors played a part, but these ones in particular came to mind when public flagelation as a form of corporeal punishment was wildly accepted. First, an authority is the one telling them it's correct, to go ahead. Secondly, another authority (the minister) had previously shown approval to such unusual punishment. Thirdly, they are not the ones to be engaging directly in the act, and even if they were, it would be acceptable because an authority has told them so. They may even believe the punishment to be a necessary evil for the greater good.

In fact, the minister's son was actually correct when pleading his case, they were accepting it because it wouldn't affect them directly.

Regarding the cinematographic descent of the public opinion regarding the situation can better be exemplified by the old man we've seen through the episodes.

Does suffering justify misdeeds?

Today I came along the difference between excuse and reason. You may give a reason for your behavior, but it doesn't excuse it.

Not because I've suffered through shit, means I have to make you suffer too.

I may explain myself, but it's on the other side to excuse me.

Why I hate the unreliable narrator and why I love it so much

This story has been told mostly through the eyes of Judge Kim and what he hears and sees regarding Judge Kang, if anything, the narrative is very close to that of the narrative we've seen in The Great Gatsby. An enigmatic man is being narrated to us from the eye of a man who hasn't known him for a long time.

How is that an unreliable narrator? The narrator has their own set of bias and moral standards which function as lenses through which they see the world.

Another way of putting it would be the way teenage romances are often written in a first person narrative where either of the two teenagers is the narrator, so the author can sell to us something as simple as offering a pack of gum as the most romantic act on earth. We're perceiving interactions through rose tainted glasses.

In this case, we're seeing the interactions through Judge Kim's eyes who doesn't trust Judge Kang from the get go due to his own preset bias.

The narrative becomes even more unreliable as we're not exactly sure if what Judge Kang disclosed himself is a fact.

The reason why I love this narrative is because it leaves a lot of space to make simple plot twists to a narrative and make them seem grand, and can elongate a story without making it obvious.

The reason why I hate it is because sometimes, in tv shows mostly, we as viewers can see the other side of the story and grow increasingly frustrated with the main character's prejudice and misunderstandings (I'm looking at you my beloved Beyond Evil).

Also, because I have to wait for a long time before I actually have a clear picture of it.

[13solo]

Alrighty!! I don't know if you've given these but I don't know them so mc's name and pronouns please!

What was their reaction to arriving in the Devildom? Their first impression of the brothers? Which brother do they like the least? What do they think of their room? What do they think of the food? Are they going full demon harem or are they only romancing one or two of the characters? (or none! Totally valid that way too)

Do they have any family? Close friends? Pets? Who's the first in their life to notice they're missing?

Do you consider them to be Lilith's descendant? If so, how do they react to the reveal? How did they react to dying? Do they ever forgive Belphie?

Are they particularly interested or invested in becoming a sorcerer? What's their favourite RAD subject? Least favourite? How do they like the uniform, and do they wear it sloppy or neat? Do they try to fight the demons who openly talk about trying to eat them?

How do they feel about bugs? What's their opinion on slime? Are they are germaphobe? Do they bite (non-sexual). How do they feel about being barefoot?

What's their happy place? How do they feel about crying? If they could have any superpower what would it be?

Do events play out like they do in canon or do they diverge? What does your mc need? What drives them? What's their greatest fear?

Do they have any hobbies? Do they spend a lot of time online? Do they engage with fandom? If so how do they feel about discourse?

Obviously this is quite a lot so just skip over what doesn't suit you!! And if there's anything else you want to say about them definitely throw that in too!!

NO LITERALLY THIS IS SO SWEET THANK YOU FOR TAKING INTEREST AND JUST INFODUMPING IM

but yeah these are a lot and i dont want to clog up peoples dashboards and im also way too shy about my cringe to disclose it in broad ass daylight anyway so im putting it under a readmore!

also tumblr ended up lagging insanely hard with how long this post became so im gonna um. break it up into different parts if you dont mind (theyre all readmore’d though i promise im not going to colors of the sky your dashboard)

top dollmaker

bottom dollmaker

their name is rene!! i alternate between using she and they for them, but that’s really just because im too used to mc being given they/them pronouns that it sticks lmao. she’s nonbinary though, dresses like an eboy and has a fuckugly mullet from (badly) cutting her own hair.

she’s way too laidback and apathetic, so when it clicked for her that she really was in an exchange program in hell and not having some weird dream she just kind of shrugged and accepted it, which wigged lucifer out a lot. her life in the human realm wasn’t the best, so as a sort of defense mechanism she ended up learning that the best way to deal with unwanted situations is to just passively let it happen.

as for her first impression of the brothers, she only really had interesting first impressions with three of them:

she hated lucifer pretty much immediately. his pride and the way he treats everyone around him intimately reminded her of a parent she has a bad relationship with, and as a result she kind of ends up being satan 2.0 where she goes out of her way to rebel against him and constantly tests the boundaries of exactly how much she can get away with, being an exchange student that diavolo wants protected at all cost.

her and mammon also fought like cats and dogs at first, but in a different way than with lucifer. if her and lucifer were a strict father and his unruly kid, then mammon was that kid that she constantly got in trouble for fighting with at the playground NGJMDSKAGNFMDSA. their fights were really childish and lacked any real bite.

belphie is the only other brother she had a really distinct first impression with. he was able to charm her easier than most demons because sloth is her biggest sin. instead of the attic meetings, most of her conversations with belphie happened in her dreams. belphie was probably who she was immediately closest too, but not in a good way. it was a really toxic friendship where they enabled each other’s worst qualities

the rest of the brothers she actually had a pretty normal acquaintanceship with? they werent really friends Yet, but they got along well enough and didnt get closer until their respective pacts.

but romance wise, she only has a canon romantic relationship with mammon. if it wasnt obvious shes um. more or less a self insert that ive kind of tried molding into being a (hopefully?) interesting oc in its own right, and im personally not super comfortable with the idea of dating family members at the same time (not that theres anything wrong with people whose mcs do date them all! its a personal preference thing for me), so she doesn’t ever canonically get together with anyone else.

however i am also a huge sap and i love literally everyone in this game so much so i do have a lot of “what-if” aus where she gets together with asmo, simeon, and belphie. theyre each sort of their different aus though instead of anything substantial

[angelswithcigarettes]

“Tiny nose”

Summary: Morgan has a girlfriend. He wouldn't if he would know how she treats Spencer.

Prompt: "I can't stand you" [https://pin.it/6WY9CoD]

Warnings: Abuse, Suicide Attempt

Relevant Tags: Autistic Spencer Reid

Word Count:11295

Chapter:11/11

Ao3:

First Chapter:

Hotch can't say he has every witnessed two people forming a friendship as fast and as strong as Reid and Morgan.

From Spencer's first day on they are inseparable and he likes to think it is because Morgan didn't make a big deal out of him. Out of the kid that grew up as always the smartest one in the room, that grew up blowing peoples mind and at the same time doing the opposite. Having people judge him. Not understanding him but Morgan met him, and not in a disrespectful way, just didn't give a shit what his title says and the rest - he learned. He did everything he always does and when Spencer showed him he was uncomfortable he changed his ways and by now,years later, they play in each others cards without missing a beat.

Spencer is kneeling in the entrance area of Morgan's new house project, cuddling Clooney who had jumped in his lap, licking his face. Morgan had told him he would spend his weekend here and that Spencer can step by if he wants too and Spencer had been bored all morning, until the boredom turned into nervousness and he needed to do something.

"Pretty boy is that you?" He hears him calling from somewhere in the back of the house,but Spencer doesn't answer and just continues cuddling the dog,feeling the warm spread through his body when he lays his head on his tight, looking to to him. His black fur glancing in the sun light shining through the window. "Only one man can keep this dog this comfortable besides me." Morgan crouches down in front of him, only in Jean's and his boots having lost his shirt over the morning. "You okay?" Carefully he patted Clooney too and waited for an answer but quickly realized that Spencer wasn't going to talk to him. "Why don't you take him to the backyard or for a walk? He was bored all day long." Spencer agrees grabbing the leashe and then wrapping it around his knuckles multiple times before pressing his fingers around it. "He won't run away,the two of you always come back together."

Over the years Morgan had found out how much Clooney calms Spencer down. It wasn't untypical for Spencer to snow in and just cuddle with the dog or needing help from Morgan and he doesn't mind one bit.

What he didn't expect was his girlfriend to show up while Spencer and Clooney are out but shortly she was hanging around his neck while they stumble down the hall and pretty quickly they were enjoying themselves pretty good while Spencer comes back and plays with Clooney in the backyard. "You have a guest" Denise says out of breath, looking out of the window.

"I know." He continues and then she stops him again.

"You know?"

"Yes it's Spencer."

"Who is Spencer?"

"Let's maybe not talk about him right now?" By the time they are done, Spencer is still throwing balls while talking to the dog over anything that comes to his mind. "You can help me with the kitchen."

"Do you not want to introduce us?" She asks looking out of the doors leading to the backyard.

"He is busy."

"At your house?" Morgan starts walking into the kitchen.

"Yeah, he doesn't bother anyone here does he?"

"No I am just surprised."

"If that is what surprises you about him, you should get prepared for what that man can do with his mind."

"How do you know him?"

"We work together." Morgan goes back to fixing the sink while Denise is not much of a help just sitting on the old kitchen counter talking to him until Spencer comes in, his cheeks red from the sun and Clooney panting from the heat. "There you are, let me get you two water." The man motions to Clooney to follow him while Spencer stays frozen in place. His glances shifting around the room while he still holds the leash in his hand.

"I am Denise." She hops of the counter approaching Spencer with a stretched out hand but he moves back his ears now turning red too.

"Spencer. Spencer Reid." He contains the grip on the leash not shaking her hand.

"Here comes the water bottle." Cherful Morgan approaches him and realizes what must have run down. "Spencer meet my girlfriend Denise. Denise,meet my boyfriend Spencer." He jokes and opens the water bottle for him.

"I am not- I am not his boyfriend." He stutters out and then takes a sip.

"She knows. What do you guys say we order some pizza?"

"Sound good to me." Denise tells them and Spencer agrees too and when the Pizza arrives they all sit down on the wide steps that lead into the backyard. Clooney cuddling against Spencer's leg, Denise in the middle and Morgan on the right.

"Pretty boy don't even think about giving him Pizza." Cheaply Spencer looks at Morgan and then nods before opening his cartoon.

"I think you actually have my Pizza."

"Nope I have mine."

"I have mushrooms on mine." He tells Morgan looking disgusted.

"Well I have a spinach on mine but if that doesn't bother you we can change." Spencer looks at Morgan ones than back down on his Pizza, still having the disgust but also embarrassment all over his face so Morgan gets up and crouches down infront of him. "We can pick those off, no problem. Is it okay if I touch your food?" Again disgusted Spencer shakes his head and the continues to pick the mushrooms off himself while Morgan feeds them to Clooney.

"He likes them." Laughing Spencer hands another one to Morgan. A few years back Morgan would have tried Spencer to try them too but by now he barely tries pushing his boundaries with food. He still does sometimes but food like mushrooms are a lost case. "Are you even sure he us allowed to eat those?"

"He is." Morgan cuddles the dog one last time and then gets back up. "Now good?"

"Yes." If he sees Spencer letting Clooney eat a small bite he chooses to ignore it. Rossi made a joke ones asking if Spencer is actually friends with Morgan or if he is just friends with Cooney and Morgan is the extra.

Spencer doesn't engage in the conversation they have, he is just fine being near Morgan and eating his dinner he doesn't need a conversation to feel comfortable.

"How long have you been friends?" Denise asks shortly after Spencer got into his car and left.

"He could tell you the exact days but I guess eight maybe nine or ten years."

"Do you spend a lot time together?"

"We work together so we practically spend less time without each other."

"And outside from work?"

"He normally steps by if I renovate houses or we watch a movie or something. He is more someone who needs his time alone. But he has no problem spending that alone time around my house or with Clooney."

You can find ten more chapters on Ao3 (link above)

[corruptedconfessions]

How would shoto, katsuki, and Izuku handle feeling their instincts overwhelming urge to scent mate, without revealing they're a werewolf? Or even better (for some drama), they're mate doesn't even know it yet! They think they're just friends, or classmates. Only a matter of time though....

I am just...so weak for any type of supernatural creature x human who has no idea whats going on or that they’re being courted troupe 

Maybe its because protective/delusional yanderes are my favorite and that fuels them

Also usually I don’t do yandere unless specified but I got yandere ideas and vibes from the ask so that's why this one is different! If you’d like non-yandere with this feel free to re-ask it and ill do it for you! Also im sorry I dunno if this was exactly what you asked for QuQ

Shouto: 

Shouto would be the most secretive about his werewolf side and any...unseemly instincts that come with it. His father was a werewolf who couldn't control himself around his human mate and he swore he would never be like that no matter what happened. He had seen first hand how fragile and weak humans are compared to werewolves and he is determined to let you live a normal, pain free life, with him, of course. Having said that having his mate to be (he’s working on it) so close to him all the time, smelling like others, and not like him nearly sends him through the roof every time. 

Now if you were already friends he’d try to just play it off as casual affection, throwing an arm around you occasionally, bumping shoulders more often, “accidently” tripping and knocking into you, anything that could get even a drop of his scent on you. Even from an outside perspective it just looks like he is an awkward mess with a crush trying to be closer to you, nothing to suspicious but its enough that he can keep control of himself...for now. But he’ll be 10x more on edge, barely restraining growls when people touch you, people talk to you. Just the thought of someone else breathing around you makes his skin crawl, nails sharpening off into claws, teeth elongating into dangerous fangs. 

This is a dangerous game he was playing with his instincts, basically the equivalent of swinging a piece of meat in front of a starving dog and expecting it not to bite. He won’t last long in this state before he bites...and when he does it will be you that suffers the consequences...

If you’re lucky enough to already be dating him it won’t be as drastic, he’ll just come across as a clingy lover, enjoying cuddling and hugging on you all the time. It can get a bit annoying since it seems like every time you stand still for more than a few moments he’s draped over you like a blanket, rubbing his face into you’re neck. But he is soft and sweet enough that it just comes across as this little quirk he has, you brush it off. As long as you keep tolerating it and don't confront him about it everything can go on as normal for you. Just never try and break up with him...for your own safety and others.

Izuku:

Izuku is clingy on a normal day, now bring his mating instincts into this? He’s insufferable. He can only really be calm when you are dripping in his scent and clearly that isn’t achievable in your current circumstances so he is left on edge and anxious, hovering around you and being overly aggressive to anyone else that approaches him.

Honestly even if you’re “just a classmate” you’re going to be pretty good friends with Izuku, he is loveable and persistent enough that you can’t stop it. And as a (hopefully) future pack alpha werewolf he is clingy in general towards those he wants to bring into his pack, which includes some classmates, so luckily for him rubbing and hugging on you isn’t that out of character for him. You, much like his other friends, aka those he has claimed as his future pack, almost always are dripping with his scent thanks to his overly affectionate personality. And even if he hasn’t been hugging on you he’s always quick to offer a jacket or sweatshirt if you’re cold, seeming to enjoy you wearing his clothes more than anything. It soothes both his need to scent you and his possessive need to show that you are claimed by him. 

Unlike Shouto he just plays off his clinging as normal, he’s not awkward or hesitant about it so you don’t really question it, just assuming that his touchiness is just who he is, which isn’t far off from the truth. It gets to the point that when he eagerly snuggles up to your side at lunch, or wraps his arms around you as he snuggles up to your back on a cold day, or any of the hundreds of other acts of physical contact he engages in don’t feel weird or romantic, it’s just who Izuku is what your friendship is like, until it turns into something more...

If you are resistant towards his constant affection he will be much less...calm about it. Roughly grabbing your shoulder and pulling you against him so you are covered in him for the briefest moment, the slightest hint of his scent getting on you. Or he’ll get more sneaky, leaning over your shoulder to glance at your notes as he asks you questions about the homework or asks what youre doing. If you continue to fight his affection he’ll get more and more aggressive, towards others and then even towards you. You better change your attitude quick.

He can only bend so far before he snaps.

Katsuki:

Katsuki is the most blunt or the most secretive about wanting to scent mark you, depending on your relationship. He knows he’s going to be the alpha of his very one pack one day, and his pack needs a strong mate like you by his side. Katsuki has the strongest instincts out of the 3, which leads to his aggression.

If you are a friend of Katsuki he’ll go one of two ways, the first way is he’ll be bold and blunt, pulling you onto his lap or forcing people to move so he can sit next to you, pressed up against your side. He’ll angrily throw his jackets at you and yell at you to cover up no matter how many layers you are wearing, growling and yelling at you until you listen and put on his scent soaked jacket. Or he’ll be much shyer about it, waiting until you are in private to hesitantly pull you into hugs or sit closer to you, still acting confident but it’s clear he’s a little timid, unsure of how to initiate physical contact with you. Either way one thing is for sure, any other werewolf will never doubt who you belong to, even if he hasn’t mated and marked you up yet.

If you are just a classmate the same scenario really will play out, but leaning more towards the first aggressive one, he’ll yell at you, shoving and fighting you more during training, anything to allow more physical contact between the two of you. He’ll follow you around growling and grunting at you if you point out how he is glued to your side, stepping even closer until your bodies are brushing against each other, glaring and pouting at you if you continue to point it out further, making him turn red in embarrassment 

No matter what he’ll be aggressive and protective of you, especially towards others. Even those he is scouting to be part of his pack need to be careful around you. The second you complain about anyone, or anyone hurts or upsets you, they are gone. He needs everyone to be able to smell that you’re his (even though he knows most people can’t tell) and he needs to protect you from threats until he can cover you in his scent everyday, to lock you up and keep you safe, his precious little mate. 

[r3b3lgrrrrrrrl]

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 109 2Xs2) "Welcome To The Hotel Diablo"

@crystalbaby12 @backoftheroomandnotbelonging @5sosfam1dlover @rosefilledhearts-blog

El Diablo begins play as the lights go up. The masses lose their minds at the sight of the full stage. Luna's next to Colson with Casie. Pete, Ashleigh, Dom and Ashley are close by. Sam's near Baze as Dub, Noah, Mod, Caroline, Naomi, Trippie and Skies spread out around them.

Only Colson has a mic but you can barely hear him as everyone rapid fires the lyrics with him. Luna dances with Pete, Ashleigh and Casie while teasing Colson as he moves around his friends on stage. All of them loudly shouting how they KEEP THEIR CIRCLE TIGHT.

It's a fun and unique sight. Something that will never be recreated again. A true gift from Colson to his original fan base.

"THANK YOU!! WE FUCKING LOVE YOU FAM!! SEE YOU AT ESTFEST!!" Colson screams as the lights go down one final time.

Kissing Casie's cheek, he glances over at Ashleigh. Her nod tells him she's Got It. With that, he slings a squealing Luna over his shoulder and trots OffStage. He's got his own Backstage Ritual to attend to.

------------------------------------------------

"That was so fucking intense, Bunny!" Luna exclaims once Colson sets her down.

"I know." His mouth buzzes into her's as they strip off each other's clothes.

Colson lifts Luna up onto the small table against the wall. Having lit a joint as he carried her down the hall, she lifts it to his lips.

"I love you." He lightly chuckles as he exhales.

Guiding his thick cock into her warm pussy, Luna groans out in pleasure. Wrapping her legs around him to pull him in closer as he begins to thrust into her. Luna sucks on Colson's neck before lifting the joint to his lips. Grabbing her by the back of her neck, he kisses her hard. Exhaling his hit and filling her lungs.

The extra carbon dioxide makes Luna heady. She closes her eyes and runs her hands through Colson's hair. Enjoying his cock as he plays with her pierced nipples and nibbles on her ear. There's a sweet electricity to Colson and Luna's sex. It's passionate and rough but not aggressive.

Clenching herself around his dick, Luna lowly moans out Colson's name. Letting him wash over her as she gets them high. Colson grips her ass and lower back, making his way deeper into her. With her head back and neck exposed, Colson draws his tongue over her tattooed skin before opening wide and biting her JUST enough to make them both cum.

"Holy FUUUUUCK, Bunny!!" Luna cries out as her body shakes with his in pleasure.

"Can't say I don't know your spots." Colson sighs with a grin as he kisses her.

"I love you too." Floats from between Luna's lips in a content sigh as she closes her eyes and leans her forehead against his.

-----------------------------------------------

Dressed in a pair of tight, black shorts, sheer tights, a printed black tank and knee high black boots, Luna's hair is still loose. Colson had tossed on a dark T and jeans while Luna had cut out their lines. Burning, kissing and snorting before making their way BackStage.

Everyone's in high spirits, celebrating the epic show and album's success. Casie reminds her dad of the necklaces and helps Colson pass off the coveted Double X chains to Naomi, Trippie, Ashleigh, Skies and Dub. They all go on to toast Colson, Hotel Diablo's release and each other while hugging and joking together.

It's not long before they have to head out to Velvet Dog for the release party. Casie gets huge GoodByes and Love before Bullet leads her and Ashleigh out to a private SUV. Her and Bullet will meet back up with them after dropping off Casie to Emma.

------------------------------------------------

The rest of them pile into multiple other SUVs. They're headed DownTown to a smaller, more intimate nightclub. Each of them chatting, drinking and getting stoned along the way in the five seperate vehicles.

Leaving Agora wasn't a problem. Pulling up to Velvet Dog, they can see it's gonna be much more of a hassle getting in there. Fans and The Paparazzi are surrounding it from all angles. The venue's own security is doing it's best at controlling the chaos. Benny's driving Colson, Luna, Rook, Baze and Sam.

"What do you wanna do, Kells?" Benny asks looking over his shoulder.

"Fuck it, make a path and let's get the fuck in there." He shrugs at Benny. Turning to Luna, he looks at her seriously. "Do NOT let go of my hand." He asserts before kissing her.

Luna nods a silent Yes as Benny taps on the window. Grabbing Luna's hand, he confirms everyone's ready before opening the door. Making Luna laugh when he shouts WE OUT.

Outside in the dark it's bright. It's loud. People are aggressive and Colson is on a mission. Clutching Luna's hand, he pulls her through the crowd behind Benny. Colson's super focused. Knowing how much she hates crowds, he's trying to successfully get them inside before anyone can stop them, seperate them or say anything to piss either of them off.

He does. Like a champion. Winning him a thousand happy kisses from a grateful Luna.

-----------------------------------------------

Inside is just as crazy. Record executives are there. Other artists from Interscope. More family and friends from Cleveland along with fellow supportive friends who flew in from LA and Philly.

Normally ones to seperate and work their own aspects of a room, Colson keeps Luna close to him tonight. She doesn't mind, happily staying by his side as he introduces her to those she doesn't know and they greet mutual acquaintances and friends they have together. Watching them in action, they truly are a Power Couple. Both of them smart, charming, gorgeous and engaging. Easily laughing and enjoying each other as they glide through to the nightclub celebrating Colson and The Boys.

They run into Johnny, Colson's partner in his 27 Club coffee venture. Unlike Dub, Johnny isn't leery of Luna. Colson listening with amusement as the two easily connect over music, the pain of starting up a business and his shocking love of her paintings.

"Yeah, I caught your exhibit back in '15.... Your shit is incredible. I wanted to buy a piece but none of it was for sale surprisingly..." Johnny trails off with furrowed eyebrows.

"That's myyy girl for ya." Colson laughs as he tosses his arm carefully around Luna's shoulders. "Dawg, she's a snob. She don't sell shit... if I didn't hear them myself, I wouldn't even believe she has seven fucking records!" He laughs looking down at Luna's rolling eyes as he kisses her forehead.

"Maaan..." Luna begins to whine with a smile.

"Why don't you sell your stuff?" Johnny asks.

"I hate you." Luna lightly chuckles as she nuzzles her head against Colson's chest before answering Johnny. "Most of my physical work is made for someone or something intentional. I'm not comfortable with someone else owning something that holds my intimacy with another." She tries to explain to his accepting nod.

"So then why release your music?" Colson challenges her.

"Because that's universal.... And it's MY guts I'm bearing not some..."

"You got like 20 mins, Kells." Ashleigh interupts them.

"Oh shit, alright. You coming with me, Kitten?" He asks looking down at her.

"Of course." She reassures with a smile. "We'll catch up later. It was a pleasure to meet you." Luna beams as she shakes Johnny's hand.

Before he can agree, she's gone. Hand in hand with Colson. Blonde hair trailing behind her like a memory.

------------------------------------------------

Their performances during the record release party were equally on point. Some more fun while others are more thought provoking and gut wrenching.

Catching certain faces before he had hit the stage, Colson decided to have Luna pop OnStage during Hollywood Whore. Cutting in only to recite the changed lyrics the way he wanted her to. As always, on and off stage, Luna was nothing short of a wreckage to be dealt with. Her powerful voice reaming out the room with Colson's truth as she moved her tiny, tattooed body seductively around her Lover before propping herself against his slender one.

🎶It's because of y'all//He couldn't understand//The worth of his career//'Cause of y'all//He hated himself//For so many years//'Cause of you//He never thought//That he could trust//But//You better watch your back//Cuz he's about to wife//ME up🎶

Her slip in had been flawless. Sending their friends into an uproar as Colson grabbed Luna's ass. Neither missing a beat while she trotted OffStage.

The rest of the gig went off without a hitch. Smoke and lights exploded around them constantly while Naomi and Phem's voices were on perfect pitch. Trippie and Lil Skies nailed their own features with Colson and Dom killing their performance of I Think I'm Okay.

With no encore planned, Luna and Colson went HARD on Bad Things. Both of their voices strong as The Boys roared behind them and they passionately played and pushed off each other. Their performance intense and extremely sexual as Luna ran the stage with her presence and Colson with his guitar. To this day, it's both of their favorite times OnStage.

------------------------------------------------

Trying to escape to his dressing room with a laughing Luna over his shoulder, Colson is stopped. By Diddy and Jimmy Iovine of all fucking people. Setting her down, the couple addresses the two men.

"Yo!! Be proud, Son. That shit was fire!!" Diddy proudly proclaims as he pulls Colson in for a full on hug.

Luna and Jimmy stand eyeballing each other. He doesn't know what to say to her and she's not fucking up Colson's Big Night.

"You too, Kid!" Sean says to Luna as he pulls her in for a hug once he's released Colson.

"That was an extraordinary show." Jimmy says, offering his hand to Colson.

"Thank you. I appreciate that. I leave everything I have OnStage every time I perform." Colson answers as he shakes his hand.

"It shows." Jimmy nods his head, never seeing Colson perform before he's beyond impressed by the underrated artist.

"He's going overseas..." Sean says to Luna as Jimmy and Colson interact.

"I know." Luna answers with a nod.

"With Hotel Diablo debuting so high, if the momentum keeps up I'm adding more US dates after." He says as he studies her reaction.

"Then you better get us a bigger bus... And. I don't want fucking Don." Luna eyes Diddy with a seriousness to her tone.

"What's your problem with him?" He asks with a laugh.

"He's a fucking douche who has no respect for Colson.... You know how I feel about that, Sean." Luna giving two answers that they both know.

"Alright, no Don." Diddy laughs at her.

"And a bigger bus?" Luna pushes.

"We'll see." Colson's boss laughs at his girlfriend. "Just don't mention any extra dates. I don't wanna hype him up til I'm sure..."

"So, bigger bus?" Luna smirks.

"Yeah. Bigger bus, you bitch." Diddy laughs as he pulls her in for a hug. "He's lucky to have you. You're one of the very FEW I give into." He continues to laugh as he kisses her cheek.

"I know." Luna grins at him. "And I love and appreciate you for it." She asserts before squeezing him again tightly and making him laugh even more.

"You better marry this bitch before she changes her mind!" Diddy continues laughing as Luna releases him from their hug.

"Psh... As quick as I can, Boss." Colson laughs as Luna tucks herself under his arm.

"YEEEOOOOOO!!!" Comes a loud voice above them.

"Looks like you got more shit to attend to. We'll catch up soon. Congratulations, Slick. I'm proud of you." Diddy says, dapping it out and hugging Colson once more before disappearing with Jimmy.

"I SAID YEEEOOOOOO!!" Tyree shouts as he bursts through the BackStage crowd.

"My mans!!" Colson hollers in delight as they embrace each other while Lamar and Luna happily greet each other in the meantime. "You made it!!" Colson says excitedly.

"Yeah... But without Ash we'd be dust in the wind, Homie." Ree replies with an annoyed look.

"My bad, Yo. But you're HERE!!" Colson shouts as he pulls Luna, Lamar and Tyree in for a group hug.

"Look at these motherfuckers." Dub comes up with a laugh.

Lamar and Tyree turn to greet their longtime friend. Dapping and laughing, the boys catch up while Luna stands awkwardly amongst them. Finding her exit clause, Dub calls her out.

"She don't like me." He teases her.

"Nah, Motherfucker. Don't put that shit on me.... You're the one who came up in here all Strong Man, Strong Man." Luna cocks her lip as she narrows her eyes.

Standing amidst Lamar and Tyree, Colson can't help but laugh at Dub from behind her. They may know... But he has no idea what he's in for.

"I don't know what your fucking problem with me is or where the fuck you get your Word from but until you climb on that bus or in a house with us... You better check your resources MOTHERFUCKER cuz you don't know shit. Bestfriends or not, we can buck. Right here. Right fucking now." Luna snarls with squared shoulders and a deadly look in her eyes.

"Ho!! Calm down, Shorty!!" Dub laughs, putting his hands up. "Don't shoot. I don't wanna fight, I was just pressen' you. You know. I gotta make sure you live up to that hype if you gonna lock my boy down!" Dub continues to laugh.

"What's goin' on over here?" Slim asks as he throws his arms around Luna and Dub.

"You, Bitch." Luna asserts as she ducks out from under his weight. "Don't think I don't fucking know." She spouts as her drunken eyes bounce between Slim and Dub. "It's alright though... He'll learn just like you did." She asserts as she snakes her head at both of them before dropping a middle finger, a kiss on Colson's long neck and turning to find someone more fun to hang out with.

"For real?" Colson asks both of them.

"Hey, I'm just goin' off what Slim said." Dub defends himself.

"Dawg, I AIN'T SPOKE TO YOU IN LIKE A WEEK!!" Slim uncharacteristically shouts, refusing to be thrown under the bus.

"Annnnnnnnd?" Dub cocks back.

"SHIT CHANGES!!" Slim continues to holler at his high school friend.

"Yo... Yo... Yo... Chill." Colson interupts them. "If anyone should be pissed it should be me, you back alley bitches. You got questions, words or problems with me and Luna, you come to ME. Don't be a couple of old lady pussies talking shit behind my fucking back."

"It wasn't shit, Kells." Slim starts to explain.

"It was enough for Dub-O to form a negative opinion about her before meeting her though, wasn't it.?" Colson shoots back as he tries to hold his anger.

Slim looks down sheepishly at Colson's words. He hadn't trusted Luna. At all, for a while. Even after she'd thrown down for his bestfriend multiple times. It wasn't until she stepped up when Bleta threatened Ashleigh and Benny and refused to lie to Colson, did Slim finally accept her. Dub doesn't know these things though because he wasn't on tour with them.

"Hey... Hey... Hey..." Dub comes jogging up behind Luna. "I'm sorry..." He says as he grabs onto her shoulder.

It's the wrong choice. The music and noise are too loud. The small BackStage area is filled with too many people. Not hearing Dub and only feeling his firm hand upon her, the New Yorker in Luna kicks in as she turns and lands a solid blow straight into his nose. Busting it wide open as he stumbles back off of his feet and onto the floor.

"WHAT THE FUUUUUCK!!" Dub shouts as he grasps his face.

"Don't ever fucking touch me." Luna replies emotionlessly before grabbing her leather and disappearing.

------------------------------------------------

"Hey.... You okay?" Colson asks after finding Luna alone on the steps out back of the nightclub.

"I don't know... I think I'm losing my shit..." Luna sighs as she passes the lit joint she has to Colson.

"Why?" He asks as he takes a hit.

"I don't know... I just laid out one of your bestfriends, was rude to a fan on the street and fought with my Mom-Mom all in the last 3 days ." Luna let's out with an annoyed sigh.

"Why'd you fight with Patti?" Colson asks.

"Fuck me and my big stupid mouth." Luna mentally curses herself.

"It's nothing." She tries to brush Colson off.

"No, it's not." Colson isn't having her bullshit, he knows Luna doesn't fight with her grandmother.

"I need a PreNump." She sighs with frustration.

"Okay?" Colson asks with confusion.

"What do you mean okay?" Luna's drunk and irrational.

"I mean okay. I'm not marrying you for your shit so.... OKAY. I'll sign whatever as long as I still get YOU. That's all I want, Baby." His voice breaks as he climbs on to the step behind her and wraps himself around a confused Luna. "You."

"You don't care what the PreNump includes?" She asks with a slight attitude.

"No. I don't give a fuck." Grabbing her chin, he pulls her eyes to him. "I'm marrying you, Luna. Not THAT Brooklyn Bitch. Not Patti Smith and Robert Maplethorpe's granddaughter. Not the coolest chick in The World. Just you. My own personal Addy." He grins as he begins to attack her with sweet, sloppy kisses.

"Ahhhh!!! Stop!" Luna giggles as she tries to wiggle out of Colson's grasp. It doesn't work. Submitting, she holds his face in her hands as she stares into his beautiful blue eyes. "Thank you." She says first as she gently kisses his lips. "And I'm sorry for hitting Dub."

"He shouldn't have fucked with you." Colson replies with a shrug and a smirk. "Back inside, please?" He asks as he stands and offers Luna his hand.

"Yeah." She agrees as she rises to kiss him.

------------------------------------------------

Back inside, the nightclub is going off. The DJ playing Hotel Diablo again in full as everyone dances and grooves. The words maybe alarmingly dark but the bop is on point.

"Yo. My bad." Dub immediately approaches Colson and Luna. "I was just trying to fuck wit you and clearly I shouldn't." He apologizes with a light laugh.

"No. I shouldn't have just swung, I'm sorry." Luna apologizes as she begins to rub her forehead.

"Nah, Ma, you good. I pushed to see how hard you'd rock... I didn't expect this shit but now I know!" Dub laughs at himself.

"I still feel like an Asshole." Luna admits.

"You good. I'd rather have Kells with a chick holding a solid right than some VSCO boujie bitch. We ride hard... And as much as it kills me to say it... I think you might ride harder!" Dub laughs again as Colson joins him.

"Enh... I got my name for a reason. Still, I'm really sorry about all that." Luna says as she gestures towards his nose.

"Stories, B. Stories." Dub winks at her with a smile as he opens his arms.

With that, Luna and Dub become friends. Her appreciating the lengths he will go to for Colson. Him respecting her fierce loyalty and the strong right fist she has for herself and her man.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

The album release party is still in full swing. Colson dips off as Luna grabs her and Dub drinks before she looks at his nose. Apologizing for the thousandth time to his laughter before they make their own way into the party.

Sam and Baze are making out like teenagers in a corner. Luna finds Naomi, The Ash's and Dom as Floor 13 kicks in. Drinks in hand, they jive, jerk and rap along Colson and the unique beat. Colson's with Slim, Benny, Pete, Mar, Ree and Dub by the bar busting it up. Noah, Caroline, Mod and Phem find Luna, the Ash's and Dom, easily coaxing them to the dance floor as Roulette begins. Rook can be found macken' on girls with Trippie and Skies while Bullet watches all from his perch at the bar.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"What cha guys doin'..." Luna asks as she approaches The Boys at the bar.

Bad choice. Colson and Pete immediately pounce on her like the night at 30 Rock. Linking their arms together, they catch her again like they're playing London Bridge. Shaking her all about as they happily sing their made up song.

🎶We gotta Moon Pie. We'll never let her get by🎶

"Whhhyyyy????" Luna moans as they justle her back and forth.

🎶Even when she asks why. She's our drunken Moon Pie🎶

They continue to laugh as they toss her around. It takes strategic planning to get out of a mess like this, only a skilled mind could handle the pressure. Being a smart cookie, Luna turns and throws her arms around Colson's neck and pulls him in for a perfectly distracting kiss. With her fingers climbing up his neck into his hair and her tongue dancing in his mouth, Colson has no choice but to let go of Pete's hands as they begin to roam around Luna. Pressing his large palm in between her shoulder blades as he kisses her deeply.

"Man... Fuck you guys." Pete complains as he leaves them be.

"🎶And a Moon Pie got away🎶 Luna sings to herself as she enjoys Colson's mouth much more than his and Pete's stupid ass game.

"Mmmm... You may taste good but you're not slick." Colson smirks once their mouths seperate.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Luna replies with a devilish smile.

"Okay, Moon Pie." Colson laughs before kissing her again. "Grab a drink?" He asks as he gazes at her.

"Yeup." Luna smiles brightly at Colson, standing on her tippy toes to kiss him before they make their way to the bar.

"KELLS!!!" Naomi comes barreling up to Colson, grabbing him around the waist into a huge hug. "I haven't seen you but I met Luna!!" She exclaims. "I LOVE her. Where is she??" Naomi adamantly asks.

"Right here." Colson laughs, pointing behind him to Luna's back, she's facing the bar ordering them drinks.

"She is the best." Naomi drunkenly decides. "Do you know that she keeps dry shampoo in her bag and that she's got these weed candies that taste like yellow SweetTarts? She gave me two. One for now and one for later... Who does that, Bro? She's like a tiny, beautiful, little, tattooed drug pixie. I think you should marry her." Naomi declares.

"Good thing you chose first then, hunh?" Luna comments with a huge smile as she joins Colson and Naomi.

Holding her Old Fashioned, she passes Colson his Henny straight up. Always having a trick up her sleeve, Luna easily passes Naomi her seltzer and lime as a vodka and seltzer. She's too drunk to tell the difference and water is gooood.

"I love this SON OF A BITCH!!" Naomi shouts as she grabs ahold of Colson. "Will you take a quick picture of us?" She asks Luna, handing over her phone.

"Sure... Hold on... Ready?" Luna asks trying to set them up.

It's in the the dark. On a phone's camera. In a club. Looking at it, it is definitely NOT her best work.

"I can retake it." Luna offers.

"No!! I love it" Naomi gushes as she hugs Luna. "Catch you later?" She asks, pointing at Colson's confused nod. Two quick kisses to each of their cheeks and she's off with a "Cool... Love you guuuuyyyysssss!"

"She's fantastic." Luna states as she watches Naomi disappear.

"SHOTS!" Rook hollers as he makes his way towards Luna and Colson.

"So, I heard you hit Dub." Rook immediately states once they've downed the clear liquor.

"What the fuck... I'm never gonna live that down." Luna groans as she puts her head in her hands.

"Nope." Colson and Rook say in unison, their laughter makes Luna groan even more.

The release party keeps going. Top shelf liquor easily flowing. Everyone's having a blast. Dancing, drinking and joking as they enjoy each other's company. They keep the party rolling until they're kicked out around 430A.

-----------------------------------------------

Almost EVERYBODY comes back to Colson's. That would be The Blonde Don himself, THAT Brooklyn Bitch, Rook, Ashley, Dom, Lamar, Tyree, Noah, Caroline, Phem, Mod, Trippie, Skies, Benny, Bullet and a gaggle of girls.

Ashleigh had decided to go home to her family instead. While Baze and Sam tried to catch some privacy at his spot and Naomi some sleep in her hotel. Slim deciding not to go home but to follow the party as it rages on.

Always having instruments on hand, they begin a jam session. Starting off with the original riffs from Hotel Diablo before twisting them into acoustic versions. Luna and Noah subbing in for Naomi when needed.

Alcohol and blunts roll through the room as they run through different songs, joke and laugh at each other. The party going well into the ACTUAL sunshining morning.

"Yo. That could work.... That acoustic jawn. It's something different and totally sick..." Slim tells Colson as he stops him and Luna on their way upstairs, knowing exactly the seed he's planting.

-----------------------------------------------

"I'm so proud of you." Luna coos as she pulls off her shirt and bra.

"I'm proud of those titties!" A naked Colson laughs. "Now bring 'em hear!" He demands as he pulls Luna closer to him and buries his face in her plump breasts.

"Mmmm.... Show me more of what your proud of." Luna giggles.

"I'm proud of this nipple and this nipple." He says as he lightly nips at them. "I'm proud of this scorpion." He says as he traces it with his tongue. Pulling her shorts off, he kisses each thing. "I'm proud of this leg and this leg...." Colson looks up at her with a cocky grin, grabbing her ass cheeks he pulls her closer to his face. "I'm proud of this pussy." His deep voice says, his lips just barely touching her lips but his baritone easily vibrating her skin.

"Alright." Luna pants as she pulls his face up to hers. "You got me, now give it to me." She says after she kisses his soft lips.

"Get on the bed the way I like." Colson directs Luna.

On all fours she goes, ass in the air, perky and dying in anticipation. Colson gives her one HARD

❗SLAP❗

Making her squirm in delight before dragging her closer to him by her hips. Running his fingers along her lips he can feel her dripping for him. Reaching around, he sticks his finger in her mouth as he enters her. Luna's back arches as she sucks her juices off his finger. Both moaning in pleasure as Colson makes his way deep inside of her.

Releasing her mouth, Colson slaps her ass again. Making Luna buck against him. Slamming her ass into his hips as he fucks her from behind. Colson runs his hand up Luna's bare slender back to the base of her hair. Wrapping his fingers inside her long locks, he grips her hip tighter. Demanding her to cum.

Luna's already came twice before so a yank of the hair is just icing on the cake. Letting her body go, she shakes and quivers as she feels Colson's dick pulsate inside of her as he drops his load.

"Fuck, Luna." Escapes from his pants as he moves her hair to kiss her lower neck, making her purr.

They lay there quietly, Colson's still inside of Luna as he plays with her hair. Just as she's about to drift off, his voice brings her back to reality.

"You're still gonna go tomorrow?" Colson asks lowly as they lay together.

"I have to." She replies lightly as she tries to train her breath.

"You HAVE to take a shit. "You don't HAVE to see Jackson." Colson states as a matter of fact as he rolls out of her.

"But I do have to mindfully wipe my ass after I take a shit." Luna retorts irritated by his frustration.

"What does that even fucking mean?" Colson jerks his head to look at her.

"I don't know..." She giggles as she pulls his face close. "I don't wanna fight though... Can we just be? We never get to just be." Luna says as she drunkenly snuggles into Colson neck.

"You're coming home tomorrow?" He asks with a trembling assertiveness to his tone.

"Absolutely.... Now, can we just be Us?" She answers with a pout as she lifts her head to kiss his neck in reassurance before snuggling deeper into him.

"Yeah, we can just be Us." He sighs as he holds her naked body close to his and kisses her tossled hair.

"It better be just Us...." Colson's heart pounds. "I swear to God, I'll kill 'em both.... Fuck, she's gonna leave me like my mom... She can't... I'll will FUCK some MAJOR shit up... Calm down, Kells. You trust her.... Don't fuck this up by spinning out.... You're not Justin.... You've got her. She KNOWS that.... She loves you." Colson's mind is trying to battle all the underlying insecurities that are bubbling up.

"Bunny... You feel alright?" Luna sits up asking.

"Yeah... Why?" Colson lies.

"Because I can feel you not breathing and your heart pounding through your chest... So... What's up?" She asks as she begins to stroke his hair.

"Ahhhh... Nerves." He sighs, half lying now.

"About?" Luna pries as she continues to stroke his blonde hair.

"Fucking Jackson." He slightly admits as he reaches for a joint.

"And...." Luna continues to lead as he sparks it.

"And that you'll leave me like my mom did." He exhales a cloud of frustrated smoke.

Luna pulls Colson into her chest. Stroking his hair again, she's silent as they share the joint. It's not an awkward silence. It's the sad silence of two children who never had their mothers for different reasons.

Once the joints finished, neither need to speak. Colson reaching over to turn the side light off as Luna slides down comfortably into the bed. Resting his head on the pillow with her arm under his neck, they lay face to face in the dark. Colson pulls her closer by the small of her back as they tangle their legs inside each other. Luna let's out a shuddered breath of content as she falls into Colson's body and hold. Stroking his face, in the dark, there's no words. Just a heartfelt, lingering kiss and one thought that drifts between them both as they fall asleep.

"FUCK, I fucking love you."

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Word Limit 2 of 2

To be continued.....

[twilightxcx]

Paul Lahote - Hormones

Requested by: Anonymous. A sexy, protective Paul moment.

W/N: I didn't really know what kind of protective you wanted to go for, so I made it a Paul × pregnant! Imprint reader. I hope that's fine!

PAUL'S POV

Today has been one of La push hotest days in years. So I and my beautiful Y/N are currently enjoying the warming sun as much as possible, meanwhile the pack are having fun in the water. Emily is also here, but she sits a few meters away from me and Y/N together with Sam. I guess they wanted a little private moment, just like we did.

"Hey babe, can you help me put some sunlotion on my back?" Y/N asks turning to me as I am laying down on the big blanket her and I share. She is currently smearing in her beautifully swollen pregnant belly as I sit up next to her, taking the bottle out of her hand. I unclasp her brastrap before I start putting lotion on her back and shoulders.

Y/N is my imprint, we met two years ago in a library. I know you all might be wondering what I did there, because I'm not the type of guy to even look at a book. And well, I had a bet with the guys that said I never in a million years would be able to actually finish reading a book. And so I took the bet, thinking I easily could earn a few bucks, AND actually finish a whole book. But as soon as I stepped inside she stod there, and by that time I barley even knew my name as I approached her. So to sum up the story: No, I didn't even get a book that day, and I sadly enough had to give each one of the guys 5 dollars for losing the bet. But on the brighter and more important side, I got her. And a half year later she became mine. Now, two years later we are six months pregnant and engaged. I can't wait to have a family with her.

"There you go beautiful" I say placing a kiss just above her ear before I clasp the bra strap again. Then she turns back around, meeting my eyes with hers.

"Thank you." She smiles putting her hand on my shoulder, sending shivers trough my spine as if it is the first time we touched. I lean in for a kiss she soon answers, placing herself on top of me as I place my hands on her big belly.

As our tounges play with eachother and her hands plays with my hair, I can't help but let out a moan. She giggles at my reaction as I open my eyes again to meet her gaze.

"Not here Paul" She smiles making me smile whilst biting my lip. I lean closer to her ear, whispering so that she is the only one that can hear.

"later then?" I ask longingly leaving a wet kiss just under her ear, at her sweet spot making her take a firmer grip around my shoulders to accidently not let out a moan. "Definetly" She breathes pushing herself even more on to me, so that I feel her chest against mine.

"Hey guys, you don't wanna come and swim with us? The waters wonderful" Embry all suddenly asks standing a few meters away from us. Together with him stands also Seth, Brady and Collin, all of them dripping of water. As if Embry were to read my mind he then shakes of the water from his dripping hair like a wet dog, hitting both Y/N on her back and me on my legs with it. As soon as the cold water hits Y/N's back, she screams, making anger burst up in me.

I growl at Embry before focusing back on Y/N, making sure she doesn't have to get more cold then he already made her. So i take the closest fabric I find, to dry of my imprints now wet back. Y/N then gets of my lap, giving Embry a angry look before taking the towel from me, drying of her arms i now also realise he wetted.

"No thank you Embry, I think I'll just stay here with Paul." She says irritated putting away the towel before looking back at me. I nod agreeingly at her words as I turn my gaze back to the now 4 staring boys. As I look back at Y/N, realizing exactly what they were looking at, I quickly stand up walking over to my four pack mates as anger is running through my veins, making me wanna burst out into a wolf.

"Why are you looking at my imprints body like that? Huh? She isn't yours."I growl making Embry look up at me with frightened eyes as I hear my imprint speak behind me.

"A little help please?" Y/N says trying to get on her feet, but failing miserably. I give the four boys one last angry look before walking back to my girl, helping her stand up since shes having a hard time doing so herself.

"What is happening, what did they do?" She asks as i once again turn back to the boys, all four with their gazes in the sand, probably afraid that I'll hurt them othervice.

"They looked at your breasts."I speak honestly as her face goes from blank to a frown in milliseconds.

"Thats not very nice." She says before sighing. "But if they wanna look I guess I'll just have to let them. I'm not gonna cover up." She says waiting for me to agree, but I don't.

"You are mad at them, aren't you?" Ske asks as i nod determinely. "Okey then, go cuss them out while I go sit down with Sam and Emily. Is that okey baby?" Her voice is soft as she places her hand on my cheek, looking calmly into my eyes while doing so. I nod.

"Fine. You'll go kick their asses, and in ten minutes you'll be back by my side. Okey?" She wonders as I take her hands in mine, giving her a kiss on her forehead. "Yes, ten minutes, tops." I answer giving her a last kiss before running after the four younger packmates I realise already have started running away from me.

Y/N's POV

As I walk over to Sam and Emily, I see Paul running after the group of 4 whilst they run towards the forest, probably hoping to get away from him by hiding behind the big trees. "I guess you already have heard everything" I speak whilst Sam helps me sit down next to Emily. In the same motion, Emily turns to me.

"Yes we did, has this ever happened before? I mean the guys is usually pretty respectful, atleast with packmates imprints." Emily's voice is concerned as she speaks, making Sam also turn towards our direction while listening to our conversation.

"No, never. I mean the guys are even afraid of hugging me sometimes when they know Paul is having a bad day. This is so unlike them" I explain as Emily nods at my statement.

"It's the hormones. You are pregnant with a wolf's baby, it drives every unmated wolf insane." Sam explains looking at his own imprint, probably understanding why both Paul but also the others reacted like they did. I furrow my brows.

"Wait, it's a dominance thing? They wanna have sex with me since Paul already has?" My voice sounds surpriced as I ask, but Sam directly nods. "Yeah, kind of. But not like they ever would do anything to you, or even look at it that way. It's just our genes telling us that if a girl is suitable to have our babies, and it shows since she already is carrying one, it makes our genes tell us that she is perfect for mating." He continues as I raise my brows in shook.

"This is absolute news to me. Wow. But they would never try to do anything, right?" I ask as Sam shakes his head. "No you are Pauls imprint, as much as their hormones tell them that you are suitable, they also know that if they touch you Paul will fight them to death. So don't worry, this was probably a one time thing." He tells me holding his gaze at Emily whilst she smiles at him. I bite at my lip as I nod, facing the ocean. It actually sounds pretty understandable, the whole hormone thing. Atleast if you belive in the whole idea about where imprints carry the best genes to make a future wolf.

A few minutes later, maybe five, Paul together with the rest of the guys approach us again. All four of the younger wolves carry the biggest bruises I have ever seen. Meanwhile Paul looks just as unharmed as when he left. I guess they took their punishment without complaints.

"Hey Beautiful, these guys has something to tell you." Paul walks over to me before he sits down beside me. I nod at his statement before turning my gaze to the nervous four boys standing in line in front of us.

"We are sorry that we looked at you in that way, and it will never happen again." All four of them says in a choir as Paul takes my hand in his. I smile at them.

"It's fine guys, I'm not mad at you. Now go and play in the water while it's still warm" I say as all of them do as spoken, while Paul is already looking at me from the side.

"I'm sorry myself, I don't know what flew into them but I hope it never happeneds again." He says putting his arms around me as I put my head on his shoulder, enjoying each second I have with him.

"It's fine Paul. I guess it's just hormones, and sometimes they are hard to control. I'm fine Paul, really." He kisses my head as I am speaking, stroking my big belly with his hand as I can feel the baby kick inside of me, making both me and Paul smile.

"I love you beautiful" He says, making me look up at him. I smile at his words placing both of my hands on his cheeks, leaning in before I kiss him on his lips. "I love you too handsome"

###

This sucked, please forgive me

Taging list @mychemicalimagines

[agentunwin]

RUNAWAY [SHAWN X READER]

A/N: God this is honestly so bad because I just wrote it really quick just to have something to upload, so I’m sorry in advance jdks

Prompt: It’s your wedding day, but the man you actually want to marry will be sitting in the crowd.

Warnings: Cursing, angst, fluff (why is that a warning?)

Words: 2,381

Masterlist

-

The curls peeking from the side of the door are the first thing you notice. Shawn never was very good at sneaking.

And as he watches you and your bridesmaids getting ready for the big event that was starting in all but 20 minutes, he couldn’t control the stream of different emotions flowing through him. 

You’re wearing a long, flowing, diamond-studded dress like the star you are. This dress was you; the embodiment of class, elegance, beauty. You were gleaming, your makeup absolutely perfect, hair styled pristinely.

The glow emanating from your face was ethereal. You looked happy.

But not happy because of him.

Shawn's mind goes blank for a while, thinking about everything and nothing at the same time, and he only comes to when he notices you kindly waving your bridesmaids out of the room.

At this, Shawn stands up straight and clears his throat, pretending to check his time or fix his hair or adjust his tie; anything to not make himself look suspicious as the girls passed him, going to fulfill their duties somewhere else.

The room he had been listening in on was now silent, and the war inside his mind was only growing. Should I go in and say hi?, he'd ask himself, or should I just leave?

The long, strange silence is broken when your voice speaks out, catching him off guard.

"You can come in, Shawn."

Shawn's eyes go wide at the realization that he's been caught, but he stands up from the wall and nervously takes a few steps into the room, feeling blessed to even breathe the same air as you again.

You look different than you did just a minute ago. Your glow has dimmed, eyelids suddenly heavier, and your smile- if that's even what you could call it anymore- has turned timid and shy.

Was this the effect he had on you now, when not so long ago, he was the only source of your happiness?

"H-Hi." Shawn breathes out, nose stinging with warning of his tears that would inevitably fall at some point tonight. "Long time no see."

You only nod at this, lipstick-stained lips pressing together.

"Uh, you look great." Shawn compliments, eyes brightening the slightest bit. "Really great. I see you got the dress you always told me you'd wanna be married in."

"Yep. I love it." You mutter blandly as look down to your lap for a second, your left hand beginning to instinctively play with the engagement ring on your right hand. This has become a nervous habit of yours ever since the ring was given to you 9 months ago.

"That's a big rock," He chuckles, and you can tell at this point he's just trying to keep some conversation going, dancing around what he actually wants to say. "Must've cost a fortune, so I'm guessing this guy is loaded. Who is he, anyway?"

"His name is Michael." You hum, nodding your head. "He's a doctor, so yeah, he's pretty well off. That doesn't matter though."

Shawn bites the inside of his cheek and contemplates his next words. His ex's wedding day surely isn't the best day to confess his feelings, but it's been eating him alive for 2 years now. 2 years of crying himself to sleep, 2 years of writing songs about you, 2 years of misery. And god, he wants her to know how miserable he really is, but that wouldn't be fair to her.

"How's your love life going?" You suddenly ask, eyebrows raised. The question confuses him but he knows you're only trying to make banter as well.

Shawn opens his mouth but nothing comes out as he awkwardly stuffs his hands in his pockets.

"I've tried speed dating and dating apps and those sorts of things," He finally speaks up, but his next words are barely audible, you're not even sure if you hear him correctly. "It never works, though.. Because it's not you."

You bite your lip and he can see your eyes get even heavier at the shift of mood in the room. Shawn feels awkward and he feels stupid, but he continues talking, probably making things worse for himself.

"I miss you so much, Y/N. I miss coming home to you after long days in the studio and spooning with you. I miss those talks about what our wedding day would be like and what dog we'd get and what our kids would be like. I miss the way your face would light up with excitement every time you see me. Now, we're acting like strangers and it's killing me." Shawn takes a deep, shaky breath when he's finishing his words, trying to keep his tears at bay. He shuts his eyes and licks over his cracked lips, "But I also love seeing you happy. So if this is what makes you happy, you have my full support."

He doesn't open his eyes in fear of what you might do or say. He feels embarrassed that he just laid all of that on you when he told himself it was wrong- that it wouldn't be fair. But he did it anyway, and he could already feel regret seeping into his bones.

"What if I'm not?"

Your voice is shy, just a whimper on the tip of your tongue, but it's enough for him to whip his head up.

His eyes go wide and he furrows his eyebrows, "What if you're not what?"

"Happy." She sniffs, and now he can see the tears in her eyes as well.

His jaw drops and he's gaping at her, mind spinning. "Y/N, no, no, no, what do you mean? You have to be happy, right? You're marrying this guy, you have to be sure!"

"God," You chuckle bitterly, a look of disbelief on your face. "You sound like everyone else in my life. I can't do this."

That's when you start really bawling, and now, Shawn has absolutely no idea what to do with himself. He's standing in front of the bride who's hands are covering her face, completely ruining her makeup, and if someone were to walk by right now, this would not look good.

Shawn runs to shut the door and then he runs back over to you, kneeling in front of you and grabbing your hands in his. This familiar touch is what you'd missed for so long. It was strong and comforting, just like all of him.

"Y/N." Shawn says sternly, forcing your eyes up to his. "Tell me what's going on."

"He's not a good person!" Y/N immediately screams, tears streaming down her face even faster now. "All he cares about is money and his job, all I am to him is a trophy! But I have to marry him, I can't deny him because everyone in my life only wants me to marry a rich man. They don't even care about how I feel, and now I feel like I'm in hell every time I wake up in the morning and you're not next to me. I hate this, I hate him, I hate myself!"

You're pounding at Shawn's chest with every last word as you completely break down, heaving and hiccuping wildly, and Shawn swears he's never seen you so angry before.

Shawn catches your hands in his again to get you to stop and his grip is much stronger this time, making sure you don't escape him. He doesn’t know what to say or do and his mind is just trying to when you add the icing on top, your watered eyes looking straight into his.

“I miss you, Shawn, I miss you so fucking much.”

He’s been waiting to hear those words leave your lips for 2 years now, but now that he’s hearing them, he feels awful. He wanted to hear them, but not like this.

“You don’t have to do this, Y/N,” He whispers, a single tear straying down his cheek, “I’m not gonna let you go through with this if you don’t actually want it.”

“I only have 10 minutes, Shawn,” You continue to cry, burying your face in his chest, getting makeup all over his suit. “It’s too late.”

Shawn bites his lip and shakes his head, refusing to let you marry a man you despised. He glanced at the clock and got to work, quickly beginning to unzip your dress, being careful not to rip or ruin it. You only stand there and try to stifle your cries, allowing him to execute whatever plan he’d conjured up.

When the dress is off he’s folding it as carefully as he can given the time, and you’re standing there in your bra and underwear, suddenly self-conscious again. He notices your body cowering under his gaze and he wants to tell you how beautiful you are and not to hide from him but there’s no room for that right now. He grabs random clothes from somewhere in the room, probably one of the bridesmaid’s clothes. 

He helps you slip into it and his hands go to your hair, undoing some of the many pins and messing it up a bit. 

He steps back and looks at you, sighing heavily. It was a terrible disguise, but for now, it would have to work. 

Everything is going so fast you can’t even comprehend what’s happening anymore. He finds a bag somewhere in the room and stuffs the wedding dress in and then he’s grabbing your purse and your hand, rushing you out of the room. 

The banquet hall is rowdy, people all around talking and hoping to get a glimpse of the bride and groom before the ceremony begins. 

Shawn’s jaw clenches and he leans down to your ear, whispering, “Keep your head down, we’re gonna go out to my car.”

You do as he says and stare at the ground as he guides you through a sea of people, praying that nobody recognized you. The walk to the back door seems like it takes hours before you’re finally hit with the crisp, fresh air, signaling that you’d made it out.

Shawn’s rushing doesn’t stop there, however. He’s running with you to his car and telling you to get into the passenger seat as he runs around to the other side, throwing the dress in the back seat and handing your purse to you.

“Text someone and tell them what’s going on,” Shawn orders you, wasting no time in backing out of the driveway and hitting the long road back to the apartment. “Then turn off your phone. Please.”

You do as he says, texting one of your bridesmaids, then you’re shutting it off and taking a deep breath, looking over to him. “I can’t believe I actually just did that. Fuck, what did I just do?”

“Don’t worry about that right now.” Shawn insists, glancing at you for a second. You look like you could drop at any second now, completely drained of any energy. “Y/N, it’s a long drive home. You can fall asleep if you want, I’m not going anywhere, baby.”

That one fateful word slips off his tongue before he can stop himself, but instead of you wincing at the word, you smile gently at it, taking it in wholly. You nod at his promise and reach your left hand out, putting your trust in him. He gets the hint and grabs your hand, lacing your fingers in his. 

Shawn gives your hand a small squeeze and then you’re drifting off to the sound of his low singing and the hum of the engine.

A when you wake up, you’re eternally grateful that none of it was a dream. 

Shawn’s gently tapping your cheeks, trying to get you to wake up as he whispers, “Y/N, we’re here, wake up, sweetheart.”

You don’t know if you’re surprised or not when you open your eyes and notice you’re back at the apartment that you and Shawn used to own together. He helps you out of the truck and keeps your hands connected as he guides you inside the familiar, cozy building, heading straight for the elevator.

“You still live here?” You mutter, looking up to him. 

He nods, rocking back and forth on his feet. “It has a special place in my heart. Lotta memories here, you know. I couldn’t let you go completely.”

Those memories immediately come flooding back to you when he opens the door and you’re hit with a wave of sadness.

Your pictures are still hung up on the wall, serving as constant reminders of you every time he’d pass one. The apartment was exactly the same as you’d left it 2 years ago when you broke up with him, complaining that he was never home because of his music. Now it seemed like all his time was spent in these rooms, moping around and feeling miserable.

But not anymore- Not as long as he had you by his side.

The rest of that night, Shawn helps you get ready for bed, taking your makeup off, putting your hair up into a bun, giving you a bath, and dressing you in some of his way-too-big clothes to sleep in.

You’re laying on your side in the bed that you used to spend hours in. It feels familiar yet cold without Shawn’s body next to you. You don’t know what to do while you wait for him and you’re staring at your phone on the nightstand, tempted to turn it on- to see all of the slander, all of the angry and concerned messages. However, Shawn walks in, catching you staring at it, and he sighs heavily.

“Babe, please don’t think about it. You need to rest.” He mutters, climbing into the bed beside you. He pulls you into him and your body reacts to him like this is normal, like Shawn never left you. Your back is to his chest and your legs tangle together naturally as he nestles his face into your neck, pressing a light kiss there.

“I’m so glad you came back to me. This bed never felt the same after that night.” He whispers and you swear you feel a tear drop onto your skin, making you frown. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Shawn.” You sniff, a small smile replacing your frown. “I never stopped loving you, and I never will.”

-

A/N: god this is so bad sjdksj sorry

[butsomeofusarelookingatthestars]

Could u pls do something where u and Luke have been together since his Ranger days and ur basically a married couple but he doesn't see that ur hinting that he should propose and maybe one day u see the team and they're just like Luke wtf u playing at! 😂😂

God, I can really see this happening! Garcia would definitely give him a hard time! Enjoy

About Time

Fandom: Criminal MindsPairing: Luke Alvez x ReaderPrompt: Request

Description: You and Luke had been together for what felt like forever…but he still needed a little push from his team to realise what he needed to do.

“There’s been an accident.”

A stray tear slipped from your eye, slowly trailing down your face as you gripped onto Luke’s hand tightly. Only his touch could ground you right now. The soft beeping of the heart monitor almost soothing as you watched the rise and fall of his chest.

Seeing someone as strong as Luke look so vulnerable was terrifying. His eyelids fluttered as the pain medication rendered him unconscious. It was rare to see him looking this peaceful.

You gently caressed his face, calming him as you traced his strong jawline delicately. He murmured quietly in his sleep as you lightly brushed your lips against his.

“He’ll be okay.”

You glanced up at Spencer, forcing a small smile onto your face. You were so grateful for his reassurance. He tentatively reached out to place a warm hand on your shoulder – the affectionate gesture comforting.

“Thanks Spencer.” You looked up at him, patting his hand softly – thanking him for his kind support. The hurt in his eyes let you know he felt almost as bad as you did right now. After all, he had been the one to see Luke get shot. He was also the one who had remained with him the entire time, refusing to leave his side as he ensured that his friend received the best care possible.

As the frantic words of Emily rang through your head, you shuddered at the fear they had provoked in your heart. It had been the moment you had dreaded, receiving a call to tell you that Luke was hurt. But, it could have been a lot worse.

Your throat constricted at the thought of losing your boyfriend. It had been justifiably your worst fear when he had been in the 75th Ranger Regiment. It seemed almost cruel that he had survived Iraq only to be injured now.

You thought the sleepless nights and constant worrying had ended when he had been discharged from the army. Then, he joined the FBI. The Fugitive Task Force had been a different type of strain on your relationship – the long hours, frequent travel…the constant danger. But he wouldn’t have been your Luke if he wasn’t trying to help others.

You glanced down at him, pushing his messy curls back from his face as you tenderly ran your hands through his hair. It was strange to think that you had been together for so long.

Years had passed by, but it only seemed like yesterday the cocky young man from the Bronx had sweettalked you into going on a date with him. You never would have expected an outing at mini-golf to have turned into a loving committed relationship. But, here the two of you were remaining strong after years and years together.

“You know when he first asked me out I thought he was kind of an asshole.”

Spencer chuckled softly at your words, grateful for your attempt to lift the atmosphere. Even though the doctors had said Luke would make a full recovery, waiting for him to wake up was still nerve-wracking. The silence that filled the room only caused him to replay the horrific scenes over and over again in his head.

“I’m being serious Spencer.” You laughed softly, grinning at the thought of the countless times you had turned him down. Back then, you had been reluctant to go out with someone with Luke Alvez’s reputation. It had only been once you had seen the sweeter side to him that you had finally agreed to give him a chance.

Volunteering at the local animal shelter was the thing that gave him his shot with you. Something you were all too keen to remind him about from time to time.

“He had been out with practically every girl in the neighbourhood, breaking their hearts in the process.” Another tear dripped down your face as the emotion of the situation finally caught up with you.

It had been such a long journey to get here – the fact the love of your life could have ripped away so easily petrified you.

“I was just waiting for the right one.”

The sound of Luke’s gruff voice made both you and Spencer jump in surprise. He squeezed your hand gently as his eyes gazed at you dazedly.

“My ears were burning.” A playful grin spread across his face at your scowl and Spencer’s delighted smirk. Normally, his teasing comment would have earned him a playful hit on the arm. But, you were too scared to touch him given his injuries.

“It’s not funny Luke. You could have been killed.” You protested exasperatedly, sighing heavily as you saw him bite back a smile. Why did he have to make a joke out of everything? He rubbed his thumb across the back of your hand soothingly as flashed you a charming smile.

“I’m fine.” He replied, his voice calm and reassuring. “Thanks to Spencer.” He nodded towards the younger agent, extremely appreciative of his help in the field.

He turned back to you, his eyes softening as he caught sight of your tear-stained cheeks.

“I hate seeing you cry.” He slowly lifted his hand, gently caressing your face as he wiped away the remainder of your sadness.

A peaceful moment of silence filled the room as the three of you let the relief of the fortunate turn of events sink in. Luke had been extremely lucky.

You all glanced at the door as it opened to reveal the rest of the team, small smiles playing on their faces as they greeted their injured colleague. Rossi patted you gently on the shoulder as he stood behind you. All the team knew you fairly well given yours and Luke’s deep history and their presence had been a great comfort to you as you had sat in the waiting room with them.

JJ smiled kindly at you as she inclined her head. The blonde agent had been particularly caring towards you, knowing all-too-well the pain you were experiencing at seeing your loved one hurt in the line of duty.

Garcia entered last flashing you all a sheepish smile as she took in Luke’s wounded form and all the machines hooked up to him. The bubbly blonde had always been extremely nice towards you, but her emotions towards your boyfriend were incredibly complicated given the fact he had replaced her beloved Derek Morgan.

“It’s good to see you awake Newbie.”

Luke’s eyebrows shot up at the kindness in Garcia’s voice. He jokingly thought that perhaps he should have been shot earlier, if it would have gotten him in her good books.

You laughed softly, pressing a tender kiss to his cheek before you stood up.

“Now that I’ve seen you’re alive and you have good company, I’d best go home to check on Roxy. She’s been by herself all day.” You explained, smirking at the incredulous expression on Luke’s face.

“You’re leaving me for a dog?”

You giggled at the mock outrage in his tone, ruffling his hair as you reminded him that Roxy was in fact your substitute child. Besides, she would never make you sick with worry…unlike Luke.

The sound of the door opening once again made you all glance at the nurse who entered. A bright smile spread across her face as she approached Luke’s bedside.

“Oh, it’s good to see you up Agent Alvez.” She told him cheerfully, humming as she adjusted his pain medication. “You gave your poor wife quite the fright.”

Luke felt your posture tense, glancing up at you in confusion as you slipped your hand from his, drifting it to your shoulder to nervously adjust your bag. Your shook your head at her words, forcing a small smile onto your face.

“Oh no, I’m not his wife.” You told her, mentally chiding yourself for your failed attempt to inject false joyfulness into your voice. “Just his girlfriend.”

The words stung painfully and you could feel your composure slipping slightly, so you quickly made your excuses – placing a gentle kiss on Luke’s lips and bidding the team farewell as you rushed out of the hospital.

Luke frowned in confusion as he watched the door slam after you. Perhaps you were just emotional from all the day’s traumatic events. However, after the nurse left, he found himself even more bewildered by the judgmental looks his colleagues were shooting him.

“What?”

His question was greeted by a chorus of scoffs and eye rolls.

Rossi clapped a hand on his shoulder as he sat down in your vacant seat.

“For a profiler, you can be pretty stupid Alvez.” He muttered quietly, shaking his head at Luke’s obliviousness to his own girlfriend’s feelings.

Luke gaped at his insult, truly bewildered by his team members sudden change of behaviour.

“Yeah, the average couple usually gets engaged after around one to two years of dating.” Reid chipped in, rubbing his chin thoughtfully at his friend’s relationship problems.

His fact completely stunned Luke. He had never really considered the thought of marriage. It just hadn’t crossed his mind – particularly given the stressful and volatile nature of his work. Perhaps he had taken your strong relationship for granted.

You had never really voiced your opinion on the subject of marriage. He hadn’t even realised it was a big deal for you. Wasn’t it just a piece of paper?

He just assumed that you always knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. You were the only one for him. How could you think anything different?

A heavy sigh escaped his lips as he rubbed his face exasperatedly, all the subtle hints you had made over the past few years suddenly coming flooding back to him. God, he was so stupid.

“She’s my wife in all but name.” He murmured under his breath, almost forgetting about the team’s presence in his room. He only thoughts were of you.

“You’re punching well above your weight with Y/N Newbie.” Garcia’s insistent voice made him jump in surprise, glancing at her as she plonked herself down on the foot of his bed. “Lock her down while she’s still insane enough to love you.”

The softness in her eyes and the playful grin on her lips told him she was only teasing him, but he still shot her a disbelieving glare. The rest of the team murmured in agreement at her words, urging him to realise what he had to do.

He nodded slowly, muttering about how he would make it up to you. It seemed like he had a question to ask.

A firm hand on his other shoulder pulled him from his thoughts. Tara glanced down at him, a smirk spreading across her face as she took in his furrowed brow and look of pure concentration.

“Alvez, don’t you dare propose from your hospital bed.”

Luke huffed as he sulkily sank back into the uncomfortable hospital pillows. He supposed he could wait until he was home to ask you, perhaps even plan something special.

Actually, on second thought…

“Reid, find me the nurse. I need my discharge papers.”

[borntoscratch-blog]

How do dogfights work?

If you read the first blog post of mine about how dogmen care for their dogs, perhaps you can better understand that dogfighting isn't exactly as it seems. Regardless, I think it is extremely important to preface this post by saying that just as with any industry in the world, there is a dark side and I do not intend to discredit the animals victimized by heinous participants in the sport. Mistreatment of dogs happens in the dark, streetfighting operations - just as cruelty has the potential to exist in every other aspect of the dog world. As such, I am NOT saying that mistreating dogs in the way some people do in this industry is okay. I am attempting to help people understand that there IS a responsible side to this sport and that it is possible to be a humane, compassionate dogman. It should also be noted that this post is not meant to encourage people break the laws. While I disagree that they should have ever been passed, I accept and recognize that they have been. Breaking the law is not okay! Without further adieu, let's delve into some of the big questions people have about dogfighting!

Are the dogs forced to fight?

No! To force an animal to fight would be to have the animal engage in combat against its will. Yet, the very principles of how a dogfight works (all contact at the dog's discretion) makes this idea of force laughable at best.

A dog match begins with two dogs being held in opposite corners. According to Rule 10 of the Cajun Rules (http://sporting-dog.com/select-pages/cajunrules.html), "The referee says, 'Let go', but the handlers must never push or shove their dogs and handlers shall not leave their corners until the dogs are together." This is called scratching and is not forced upon the dog. The handlers let go and the dogs immediately run towards each other.

Some may wonder "What if they hurt the dogs to make them run?" but yet again, this can be disproven. According to Rule 5 of the Cajun Rules, "the referee shall search the person named to wash the dogs and then have him bare his arm to the elbow and wash both dogs in the same warm water and rinse them each in his half of the warm clean water provided for that purpose." Why? To make sure there is nothing toxic in the water that would hurt the dog - or the dog biting him. Rule 6 says, "the referee must search handlers for means of foul play and see that he bares his arms to the elbow before he receives his dog and must keep his arms bare in such a manner during the contest." Simply put, the referee will not allow any foul play to occur that would cause the dog to run because it is being coerced into doing so. This also doesn't make sense, when you consider the principle of gameness.

Gameness is a canine virtue that is essentially the determination to overcome any situation and never back down, regardless of the current state of the body. It was developed in these APBTs by many generations of selective breeding and testing (through these aforementioned matches). This trait is just as innate to the APBT as the border collie's desire to herd and the pointer's desire to point. People often quote that "to deny a dog its nature is to do it great harm" but somehow this quote fails to pertain to the instinctual gameness rooted in a dog's genetics. The idea that these dogs don't want to fight and are forced to is grasping at straws. Watch the following video of a dog in the corner of a pit, up to scratch. Even before he is let go, he is pushing with all of his might to get the other dog! The body language is the same as any other dog when faced with an oulet to fulfill their innate drives. How is this one wrong but the others are accepted?

Some may say it's a matter of "consent" or lack of "comprehension of the consequences." That sure, the dog may want to fight, but they don't understand the repercussions and would no longer want to if they knew what the outcome would be. To this, I bring up the practice of courtesy scratching which is done after a match is over to allow the losing dog to have one more attempt to go at the other dog. This means that AFTER the dog has finished fighting, usually a bit dizzy and battered up, they still have the same desire to go after the other dog. Also, it must be remembered that dogs make negative associations and can easily become traumatized by something. If these dogs "wouldn't want to fight if they knew the repercussions" then why do some of the best game dogs have upwards of five wins? Why do these dogs come home from a long match and still show the same enthusiasm to fight the next time? Just because you wouldn't want to fight for hours in a pit doesn't mean it's cruel or that the dogs wouldn't want to. We recognize certain human individuals have a desire for combat (MMA, UFC), yet dogs that are selectively bred for this same desire are deemed victims of abuse.

How far do fights go? What damage happens to them? Is it to the DEATH?

Since these dogs will fight to the death if they are allowed to, humans have to interfere before that can happen - so no, they are not allowed to fight to the death! According to The Book of the American Pit Bull Terrier by Richard Stratton, "An actual death in the pit is a rarity for several reasons. First, a bulldog, while formidable, is also tough and hard to kill. Second, the rules provide that a dog loses and that match ends whenever a dog wishes to discontinue the contest. Third, dogmen do have a feeling for their dogs and are not going to leave them in to be killed for no reason."

As you can see, measures are taken to prevent death in dogfighting just like they are taken in other dog sports. But what about injuries?

Dogs used in fighting will be picked up before extreme injury. After hours of combat, they may be a bit dehydrated at the end and have a few nice scars to flaunt, but the idea that these dogs skin one another and pull out the other's guts is nothing but lore. In case of accidental extreme injuries, responsible dogmen are equipped with extensive first aid skills. According to California Jack's 2007 Indespensible Tips, the supplies a dogman should have on hand are:

• Lactated Ringers + IV Catheters Fluid Lines, Injection Ports, etc. Purpose: to replace lost fluid.

• Solu-Delta-Cortef (or Solu-Medrol) + Dexamethasone (or Azium) Purpose: Reduces swelling and discomfort.

• Antibiotics Purpose: To prevent infection.

• Salix (Furosemide) Purpose: Prevents kidney problems and aids in urination.

• Banamine Purpose: To relieve pain.

• Leather Shoestring or Equivalent Purpose: to be used with tourniquet to stop bleeding.

• Blood Stop Powder Purpose: To stop bleeding.

• Vitamin K Injectable Purpose: Clots blood and can stop internal bleeding.

• Gauze and Leg Tape Purpose: To secure ringers, splints and braces.

• 2 Full Cotton Rolls Purpose: Setting splints and leg wraps.

• 2 Adjustable Splints Purpose: Secures a broken limb.

• Spray Bottle of Betadine Purpose: Flushes out dirt and prevents toxins.

• Spray Bottle of 1 Quart of water and 25cc of Nolvasan (Chlorhexidine) Purpose: Same as above, but for deep cuts.

• Prepodyne Swabs Purpose: to cleanse the ears.

• Staple Gun (+ Removers) and Cat Gut Sutures Purpose: In emergencies, it can be used to close off serious wounds after they have been cleaned. The shtures can tie off bleeding arteries.

• Betadine Surgical Scrubs or Nolvasan Shampoo Purpose: Will prevent infection during cleansing.

• Scalpal and/or Surgical Razor Purpose: To cut away dead tissue in order to prevent gangreen and infecrion.

• Surgical Scissors Purpose: Same as above.

• Sterile Gloves Purpose: To prevent infection.

• Rectal Thermometer Purpose: To monitor temperature if a dog goes into shock.

• Sterile Vaseline or KY Jelly Purpose: Can aid in temperature taking.

• Super Glue Purpose: Repairing split ears and tails.

• Granulex Spray/Wonder Dust Purpose: Used during healing process to remove necrotic tissue.

• Two clean, dry blankets Purpose: To cover a dog while he is getting fluids and to keep him warm during recovery.

• Two Dozen 3cc Syringes w/ 12 Gauge Needles Purpose: For all needed injections

• Cytomax + Peak Condition Purpose: To provide a dog with life sustaining fluids, electrolytes and nutrients.

• Epinephrine "Epi" Purpose: In emergencies it can revive a dog whose heart shuts down.

Now, some may see this list and say "well, these people wouldn't need these supplies if it wasn't harmful!" Yet, most of these supplies are useful for any pet owner in the situation of a dog with an open wound and are used for basic hygeine and healing. Only a few items are used in extreme emergencies and are there for the rare chance something bad happens, not because it is a regular occurance! A dogman carries splints not because he expects his dog to break a leg, but because he wants to be prepared if worse comes to worst. But anybody reading this should keep in mind that dogmen are there for their dogs during these fights. In fact, in the Cajun rules it says "The dog's owner or his representative shall be allowed at all times to be near his dog and watch to see that no harm is done him," and "The handlers shall be allowed to encourage their dogs by voice or hand-clapping or snapping of fingers."

And, as owners who are there for their dogs, they certainly do not hesitate to pick them up if they are in danger. As John A. Koerner 'California Jack' says, "Assuming that you’re a concerned enthusiast, when your dog is getting overwhelmed, or even if he is winning but the win will cost him his life, his life depends on your judgment. The first step in exercising good judgment is to know when to pick up," and "...if the thought, 'I’d better pick him up,' pops into your mind, there is probably a reason, and that reason is you feel in your bones that he is in danger, and so you need TO ACT on that gut instinct."

Later, he says - in reference to dogmen who don't pick up their dogs at the right time - "instead of tolerating this type of person in our sport, what we should be doing is culling them from it. Therefore, don’t be a player like that, don’t deal with players like that, and make sure you yourself compete with class … and make sure you only deal with players who compete with class like that … and you will take a giant step in making our sport a better one all the way around, especially for our dogs."

If these dogs are well taken care of (see my previous post), have been selectively bred to WANT to fight, are picked up before death/major injuries and receive intense aftercare to prevent infection or worse... then why are people so afraid to accept it?

[bachelorbro-blog1]

Season 13, Episode 1 (The One Where Blake K Doesn't Get a Rose)

Welcome back, Bachelor Nation! I’m super excited about this season of the Bachelorette (mostly because Rachel is not Nick Viall and will never be Nick Viall). You all know how I feel about Rachel (and that I knew she’d be the next Bachelorette since the first episode of last season), so I won’t wax poetic about her. Instead, I’ll just start this recap. Let’s go!

The episode opens with Chris Harrison talking about how much we all love Rachel. Duh. Obviously. Let’s move on. 

Rachel does some street dancing, plays basketball alone, “goes to court” (by which I mean she performs in an instructional video about what lawyers do as directed by someone who doesn't know any lawyers), flashes back to meeting gross Nick (complete with beignet eating and limo crying), takes a plane with her DOG WHOSE NAME IS COPPER (!!!), poses for some pictures, chats with some grandmas, and finally drives up to the mansion. 

Time to meet some guys! 

Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King is a wrestler. He is very sweaty and panty for a solid chunk of his intro video and has a very tall ten year old daughter. (Is Rachel ready to get engaged to a man who has a ten year old child and possibly be that child’s step mother?). He makes a pun about rings.

Jack Stone is a lawyer (like Rachel), is 31 (like Rachel), and is from Dallas (like Rachel). He talks about the passing of his mother while staring out at some water and then plays with a dog. 

Alex would like to let you all know that is not a meat head. He likes books and coding and learning and Rubiks Cubes. Ok? Those are things meat heads don't like! Only nerds like those things!

Mohit is a start-up guy. He loves dancing with his family in his living room. 

Alright. Here he fucking is. Whaboom -- a manboy named Lucas who frequently wears shirts that have cartoon versions of his own face on them. This guy is going to be either my most favorite or my least favorite.

Blake E (omega Blake) is a sports nutritionist and certified lunatic. He works out on the beach and talks about how amazing his penis is (by which he means it’s slightly below average). Fuck this guy.

Next up is Diggy, who loves clothes and has 575 pairs of shoes (or 1150 individual shoes). Diggy, you see, is a fashionista. He also has a dog, but we don't get to know how many pairs of shoes the dog owns. 

Josiah makes me cry. Top 5, easily. E A S I L Y . His older brother killed himself when he was younger and Josiah had to cut him down from the tree that he hung himself on. Josiah has an amazing story and is either this season’s winner or next season's Bachelor. 

A meeting of the minds commences. Among Rachel’s panel of advisors is Astrid (who I forgot about), Whitney (who everyone forgot about), nanny-having Corinne, dolphin lady Alexis, Raven (the true winner of Nick Viall’s season of The Bachelor), beautiful princess Kristina, and Jasmine G. (the one who choked Nick -- big fan). Everyone loves Eric, Raven believes that DeMario is amazing (but Whitney thinks he’s THERE FOR THE WRONG REASONS™️), and some ill-advised voice likes Dean (the one who made the “I’m ready to go black and I’m never going back” comment). 

Time for the men to come out of the limo. Finally.

First out of the limo is Peter. He is wearing a nice jacket and doesn't say anything awful. Congratulations, Peter!

Next is Josiah, this season’s winner. He makes a lawyer joke. Smells like a wedding to me!

Out comes chiropractor Bryan. He speaks Spanish and looks like a much more attractive version of my neighbor. 

Kenny calls her “Pretty Rachel” and then dances with her. I am overcome with grief. 

Rob doesn't get much of an introduction, but who cares?

There is also a man named Iggy. Diggy and Iggy. Fine.

Bryce, the transphobic firefighter, lifts Rachel off of her feet. Get out, Bryce.

Next out of the limo is Steve Urkel, followed by Stefan Urquelle. His real name is Will. As in when Will this end?

Here comes Diggy, who loves The Devil Wears Prada. He makes a pun based off of his name. 

Kyle shows Rachel his buns. Who is Kyle?

Blake K (alpha Blake) talks about his grandparents who recently celebrated their 65th wedding anniversary. Big fan of Blake K. Huge.

Brady shows up with a sledge hammer. He is immediately terrifying. He “breaks the ice” at which point I feel he should be lead away from Rachel with his hands behind his back. He is also possibly wearing lavender lipstick. 

Dean, who made that cringe-worthy comment when he first met Rachel, is shaking and grinning. Rachel lies about loving the comment. This is your season, Rachel. You do not have to lie to anyone.

Here comes Eric, my first round draft pick. Now I find him boring. 

DeMario, who brought plane tickets to Vegas to his first encounter with Rachel, looks forward to more “first moments” with her. His confidence is overwhelming. 

Gross Blake E arrives with a marching band. Do less, Blake E. I implore you. (Side note: Blake E’s hair is straight up disgusting).

Let’s make misogynistic comments about Rachel! A smart and funny woman? How is that possible? No woman has ever been smart AND funny! There must be some sort of catch! Several men’s heads explode. 

Fred, who knew Rachel in elementary school, brings a yearbook. Rachel remembers his bad behavior. I sincerely hope he becomes this season’s Liz the Doula. (Miss you, Liz!)

Jonathan, the tickle monster, makes me scream into a pillow. If anyone ever tried to tickle me upon meeting me I would actually knock them out. Not appropriate, creepy Jonathan. 

Lee, whose guitar lets me know it’s alright to hate him, wastes no time in introducing himself as a monster. He is a self-proclaimed singer/songwriter, and a me-proclaimed douchebag.

Alex the Mensa genius brings a vacuum because why not?

Milton, who literally admitted that he wanted to be discovered by a talent agent, takes a selfie with Rachel. Bye!

Adam brings a mannequin named Adam Jr. Adam Jr. (AJ) will more than likely compete on Bachelor in Paradise because Rachel hates him. AJ is left in the corner where he conspires against all of the other men in the house whilst Jonathan tickles people. 

Matt is a penguin. Can’t wait until Alexis decks him on Paradise. 

Grant arrives in an ambulance. 

Anthony is wearing a beige suit. Different!

Jamey is unsavory upon first sight and unsavory upon further inspection.

Jack Stone has a great (crocodile) smile. Maybe he uses it to bite people. 

Mohit makes some kind of comment about her having the upper hand. Is he a dom? A misogynist? Both? Neither? Where are his dancing family members?

A man whose legal name is Jedidiah quotes a Bible verse about crying. He is not wearing a full suit. 

Michael brings a brownie. I pick him.

The men wonder who will go crazy. Here’s Whaboom. He is contractually obligated to show up when someone says “crazy,” “maniac,” “Whaboom,” or “testicles.” He turns bright red while yelling and carries a megaphone. Can't wait until he’s full drunk.

All 31 men (and 1 mannequin) are now in the mansion. Time for Rachel to like actually kind of meet them, but not really because chances are they’ll speak with her for like 10 minutes each and continuously steal her from each other. 

Josiah tells Rachel his story, but she's only kind of buying what he's selling. It’s ok. They just need time to fall in love.

Dean and Rachel build a sand castle together. Dean, the youngest man in the mansion, thinks this is cute. Rachel is his babysitter.

Rob brought a baseball card with Rachel on it. 

Anthony would like to understand Rachel.

Eric and Rachel dance again, but the spark is gone. 

Someone gave AJ a glass of champagne. He is a child! He cannot drink! 

Matt the Penguin asks if Rachel prefers Michael Jackson or Prince while AJ (who, like a clown, is hilarious and terrifying) (mostly terrifying) professes his love for Rachel in French.

Rachel remembered Fred the moment she saw him. He’s the top 5 guy who makes her feel comfortable, connected to her past, but he won't win. 

Bryan steals Rachel. He is mature and handsome and surely top 5 material. His confidence, unlike DeMario’s, is endearing because it’s over-the-top in a funny way. You can tell he doesn't really believe all of these things about himself. (I hope). Rachel and Bryan kiss. She didn’t want to kiss anyone tonight, but says that she enjoyed him. 

The first impression rose is brought out. Everyone starts sweating (and drinking). Let’s be honest. Bryan is getting the rose. No one else spent that kind of time with Rachel. And, as a first impression rose winner herself, she knows who’s real and who’s fake. 

DeMario talks a lot, according to Josiah. Rachel is impressed by his confidence. 

Jamey mentioned that his suit cost $2,000. He is Gob Bluth and I was right to hate him.

Men swarm Rachel. She is starting to get nervous. Cancel the season! Send everyone home! Let Rachel have fun in the mansion by herself. 

Mohit is drunk and can't seem to find the right way to steal Rachel. 

Rachel tells Peter that she doesn’t like chocolate while Whaboom narrates through a megaphone. 

Blake E hates Whaboom so I officially love Whaboom. I would very much like to see Whaboom deck Blake E. I would very much like to see anyone (especially Rachel) deck Blake E.

None of these men seem to realize that they can only have a few minutes with Rachel. There are 31 of you and her time is more valuable than all of yours combined. Get with the picture. 

I also just realized that Alex brought a vacuum because when we first met Rachel during Nick’s season she danced with a vacuum. Fine.

“Cash me outside, how bow dah?” asks Josiah. Oh, Josiah. I was rooting for you. 

Kenny brings up his daughter -- his favorite person in the whole world. Maybe I was wrong to judge him. He’s a good father. 

The first impression rose goes to Bryan because duh. Mohit gasps. He is the DGAP.

it’s finally time for the first rose ceremony!

Roses go to: 

- Normal Peter

- Will Urkel

- Smiley Jack Stone

- Slimy Jamey

- Forgettable Iggy

- Dance Machine Eric

- Confident DeMario

- Jonathan the Creep

- Transphobic Bryce

- Alex the Mega Genius

- Kenny the Wrestling Dad

- Baby Dean

- Matt the Penguin

- Anthony (and his eyebrows)

- Brady the Lip Gloss Aficionado

- Josiah the Future Winner 

- Hatable Lee

- Fashion-forward Diggy

- Fred from Camp

- Adam (but not Adam Jr, which is rude)

- Blake E who is more than likely sticky 

and last, but certainly not least

- Whaboom (because this is reality television)

Roses do not go to:

- Bland Rob

- Drunk Mohit

- Forgettable Kyle 

- Blake K (who actually voluntarily left to see his grandfather in the ICU -- i.e. the true winner of this season)

- Grant, who was not on this episode

- Bible-quoting Jedidiah

- Milton, who will never get the chance to be famous now (FIRST CRY OF THE SEASON)

and

- Brownie-bringing Michael

Alright, the season has begun. Who will win? Who will lose? Who will beat the crap out of Blake E? Here’s to finding out!

[tabloidtoc]

Star, March 8

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: George Clooney vs. Brad Pitt -- the fight that ended their friendship

Page 1: Scott Disick's mid-life makeover -- some guys buy a convertible but Scott already has a garage full of fancy rides, so what else to do when you're edging close to 40, split from the mom of your three kids and are already dating a 19-year-old model? Well, bleach your hair platinum, of course!

Page 2: Contents, Leighton Meester and Adam Brody celebrated their sixth wedding anniversary with a couple's surf session

Page 3: Star Shots -- John Legend wore an eye-catching sweater to a photoshoot in West Hollywood, Anya Taylor-Joy stunned in a crimson gown on the set of an untitled David O. Russell-directed period film, Jason Sudeikis grabbed a bite during a break from filming Ted Lasso's second season in London

Page 4: After hosting countless rose ceremonies over nearly two decades of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, Chris Harrison is now in the hot seat himself and facing backlash for defending current Bachelor frontrunner Rachael Kirkconnell who's been accused of racist behavior -- the next day, Chris apologized and said he was stepping aside as host of the dating reality series but the damage was done as Rachel Lindsay who is the first Black lead in the franchise's history revealed she won't renew her Bachelor contract and current Bachelor Matt James supported her -- as for Chris, the fallout continues as Crest are considering pulling down ads featuring him but with critics calling for his ouster Chris wants his job back and no one at ABC wants to see him replaced but those conversations are happening

Page 5: Miley Cyrus has an idea how to help Britney Spears in her legal battle to replace dad Jamie Spears as her conservator -- Miley is hoping she and Britney can record a classic song together like an anthem like Sisters Are Doin' It for Themselves or Enough Is Enough and she's hoping to get Britney on board but that may be a challenge with the legal restrictions in place

* Mom-of-eight Kate Gosselin didn't get what she was asking for on her house in Pennsylvania -- it's upsetting that she got less than she paid for it but her hand was forced; it costs a lot to keep up a house like that on 20-plus acres and with years of roughhousing, it needs a lot of work -- with twins Mady and Cara already in college and the sextuplets growing up, Kate hopes to jump-start her career and she's dying to leave Pennsylvania and head to Hollywood

* Paris Hilton's boyfriend of just over a year Carter Reum dropped to one knee on a gorgeous private beach and offered Paris his heart and a sparkler from Cartier and she said yes -- close family was on hand to celebrate the couple who have been friends for 15 years and the party went on well into the evening -- now Paris is already making wedding plans for something simple and elegant with a gorgeous dinner and the couple is ready to start a family sooner rather than later and she's hinted she's already started IVF and if she gets pregnant they'll just push up the wedding

Page 6: Ryan Gosling needed some time off after 2018's moon-landing biopic First Man because he really became Neil Armstrong during the six months of shooting and he was absolutely drained after finishing it and he spent the next two years with wife Eva Mendes being a full-time dad to their two young kids -- now he's back and with three movies lined up, he's looking at a $75 million paycheck this year -- in addition to The Gray Man, he's gearing up for a Wolfman update and another space adventure called Project Hail Mary -- he wants to be a popcorn-movie star and he's going full-blown buff-and-shirtless action hero

* Allen v. Farrow is a new investigation into 1992 allegations about Woody Allen by his adopted daughter Dylan Farrow and her mother Mia Farrow that digs up damning new evidence against the director -- one harrowing home video shows the then-7-year-old Dylan saying her dad touched her privates and later a doorman and a building manager and a maid at Allen's NYC residence raise questions about when Woody began his shocking relationship with Mia's teen daughter Soon-Yi -- Mia also expresses fear in the doc, saying she worries that when the documentary comes out he'll be on the attack again and he'll do whatever he has to do to save himself

* Star Spots the Stars -- Julia Roberts, Joe Jonas, Luann de Lesseps, Christina Aguilera, Kaia Gerber, Tarek El Moussa and Heather Rae Young

Page 8: Star Shots -- With balloons and a box of chocolate in hand lifestyle expert Gretta Monahan arrived at The View, Melissa Gorga snacked on a huge box of sweets between Zoom interviews to promote the 11 season of The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Vanessa Lachey prepared to host a Galentine's Day celebration with macarons and wine

Page 10: Jenna Dewan making a plant-based meal, Selling Sunset's Christine Quinn and her husband Christian Richard sipped juice bar drinks while running errands in Beverly Hills, Hugh Grant stopped to tend to his laces while out for a walk in Chelsea in West London, Carrie Underwood prepped for her daily workout session in pieces from her Calia fitness apparel line

Page 12: After a stop at the Kidding Around children's store Bradley Cooper had his hands full walking with his daughter Lea in NYC, Sofia Vergara chic in a blowout and patterned top in Beverly Hills, Justin Bieber looked comfy in a message tee and pajama bottoms in L.A.

Page 13: Thandie Newton looked tense while Chris Pine hit the ground running as the two filmed the spy thriller All the Old Knives in London, Jon Bernthal braved the frigid water while Gretchen Mol bundled up on the set of American Gigolo in L.A.

Page 14: Think Pink -- Jennifer Lopez hoisted an oversized customized bubble-gum hued Coach satchel in a promo shot in NYC, Cardi B slipped on neon sneakers from her Reebok collaboration to shop on Rodeo Drive in L.A., Hilary Duff showing off a peek of her growing baby bump on the set of Younger in NYC

Page 16: In town to film The Hills: New Beginnings with their castmates Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag played in the snow with their son Gunner in Lake Tahoe

Page 17: Mandy Moore and husband Taylor Goldsmith celebrated their last Valentine's Day before parenthood with a romantic stroll in Pasadena, Michelle Obama on her new children's show Waffles + Mochi

Page 18: Chris Meloni and Mariska Hargitay in NYC, hiding her locks in a cute newsboy cap Brooke Burke grabbed dinner at Nobu in Malibu, Krysten Ritter brought her son Bruce to meet some farm animals at the Gentle Barn in Santa Clarita

Page 20: Normal or Not? Farrah Abraham suffered a serious wardrobe malfunction while hitting the sand in Malibu -- not normal, Nikki Reed gushing over her therapy chicken -- normal, Property Brothers' Drew Scott booty bumpin' with wife Linda Phan -- not normal, Lucy Hale lovingly held onto her new dog Ethel while fueling up her ride in L.A. -- normal

Page 22: Fashion -- stars in pastel frocks -- Heidi Klum, Sophia Bush, Chrissy Teigen

Page 23: Rihanna, Kirsten Dunst

Page 26: Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker are having sexy slumber parties at Kourtney's $8.5 million Calabasas pad and they are spending so much time together and she loves having him sleep over and he'll stay the whole weekend -- Travis who has lived nearby in the gated community for years is already making himself at home and not only has he moved a bunch of stuff into Kourtney's property but she leaves him to chill out and enjoy his space if she has to run errands -- even if it seems the couple is moving and moving in fast, their respective broods are on board with the new arrangement and Kourtney's kids Mason, Penelope and Reign love having Travis around and meanwhile the door is always open for Travis' kids Alabama and Landon, and Travis and Kourtney do a lot of fun stuff with their kids together -- there's already speculation that the move-in will be permanent because Kourtney knows a good thing when she sees it and Travis checks all the boxes

Page 27: Meeting the in-laws might be a little complicated for newly engaged Shailene Woodley and Aaron Rodgers because the Green Bay Packers QB is famously estranged from his Chico, California-based family -- in 2016 Aaron's younger brother Jordan Rodgers exposed the rift while competing on The Bachelorette and at the time, fans blamed Aaron's then-girlfriend Olivia Munn for turning him Hollywood but the trouble continued after their 2017 split -- now that he's with Shailene, Aaron doesn't want to bring her into that toxic atmosphere but Shailene who once called her own folks super f**ked up is not deterred and she is encouraging Aaron to let bygones be bygones but he's not ready

* Melissa and Joe Gorga's marriage troubles will play out on the new season of The Real Housewives of New Jersey but their issues are even worse behind the scenes and they've been butting heads as Melissa's career continues to skyrocket so she's distracted with work and doesn't have time for Joe and he feels neglected and he isn't one to hold back -- it doesn't help that the Envy boutique owner was rumored to be getting close to another man -- the couple is trying to work out their issues for the sake of their three kids but Melissa may be done

Page 28: Cover Story -- George Clooney and Brad Pitt: The Breaking Point -- fights, jealousy and other women -- the former besties had a major falling out and now mutual friend Sandra Bullock is desperate to reunite them -- George and Brad have barely spoken in eight years and they've definitely gone their separate ways and Brad's ex-wife Angelina Jolie played a big part in the demise of their friendship because Angie felt George took Brad away from her and their kids -- Amal Clooney found Angie unbearable and that was kind of the point of no return for Brad and George -- George is struggling to regain his luster as a director while Brad is out there winning Oscars

Page 32: Prince Harry and Meghan Markle: Interview Shockers -- as they prep for baby number two, Harry and Meghan announce a no-holds-barred interview, leaving the palace on edge

Page 34: Celebs in Wheel Trouble -- don't drink (or drug) and drive; these stars got caught making some very bad decisions -- Bruce Springsteen, mug shots of Justin Bieber

Page 35: Reese Witherspoon, Vince Vaughn, Lindsay Lohan, Michael Phelps, Khloe Kardashian, Henry Thomas, Heather Locklear, Jesse Luken, Mel Gibson

Page 36: Beauty -- curl care -- strengthen every type of wave and coil with cool new miracle workers

Page 48: Parting Shot -- Bill Murray teamed up with NFL player Larry Fitzgerald for the AT&T Every Shot Counts Charity Challenge in Pebble Beach -- despite landing in third place, Bill and Larry made a great pair, earning an impressive $209,000 for local charities