#he drank a lot of beer in this episode

[baconmoop]

No but of course that'd be his solution. It always has been.

He's spent the last 12 years being told that he's boring, that people miss the old him. That he's the boring, sad old man, and that ice king was the fun one.

Can you imagine how that must feel? To be told that the version of you that suffered a thousand years of torment is just.... Better?

During the mushroom war, the only thing that kept him grounded was Marcelline. I imagine he would've succumbed to the crown a lot earlier had they never met. Now, shes her own woman. He needs her, but she doesn't need him anymore. He feels useless.

And so when he sees this girl in danger, what else would he do but to go back to his old ways? He needs the crown to protect her, like he needed it to protect Marcy. Besides, people like him better with the crown, so who cares, right? It's for the greater good. People don't need Simon Petrikov, they need the ice king.

I hope he realises by the end of the show that he does have value. That he doesn't need ice powers, that he's not just a sad old man. I hope he finds peace.

[mrs-kelly]

man idek if i can finish this episode bc obviously the comedy is supposed to be that Charlie is getting really hurt

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck & Eddie: 6x12 Fridges & Water

Callbacks, hindsight, metaphors and foreshadowing were included in 6x12 “Recovery” regarding Buck and Eddie’s couches and hearts. But there were A LOT OF OTHER metaphors included too that revolve around Buck and Eddie’s CANON romantic relationship and two of them are their fridges and water.

Water was a huge theme throughout the episode and the inside of their fridges were on display to show the audience the contents of both of their water pitchers.  Their water pitchers were used as metaphors for the way Buck felt emotionally after he almost died and to illustrate the way Eddie’s the only person who can give him what he needs.

At the beginning of the episode, Maddie was in the process of stocking Buck’s fridge with groceries but his water pitcher was EMPTY.  She didn’t attempt to fill it and neither did he.  The reason for that is Maddie CAN’T fill Buck’s water pitcher because there’s only one person who can and it’s Eddie.  Buck didn’t fill it either because he already knows Eddie’s the only person who can fill the emptiness he feels.

Buck and Hen ate the pot roast Maddie put in the oven for Buck’s lunch but sometimes pot roast can be salty which means their water glasses should have been empty when they finished eating but they weren’t.  Their glasses had equal amounts of water in them which means their water levels were the same.  Dr. Salazar explained water levels to Buck later in the episode.

When Connor showed up unannounced at Buck’s loft, it was clear he wasn’t included in Maddie’s “Operation Buck up Buckaroo” plan when Buck asked him if Maddie sent him and he responded, “Was she supposed to?”  Buck offered him a beer but when he went to his fridge to get it, he only opened the door to the side of his fridge that didn’t have the empty water pitcher in it.  The reason for that is because Connor can’t fill Buck’s empty water pitcher either and Buck doesn’t want him to.  Also Buck didn’t take a beer out of the fridge for himself, he just gave Connor one because he didn’t know why he was there and Buck’s facial expression showed he was uneasy about whatever Connor came there for.  Buck was already running on NO SLEEP and he was getting agitated by all the visitors. If Josh hadn’t knocked on the door when he did, based on the way Connor was acting, it appears he was going to try and take even more from Buck in the form of his happiness if he had been given the opportunity.  It’s been speculated he went to Buck because he’s thinking about bailing on being a dad since his swimmers didn’t work but who knows what’s going to happen since the sperm donor storyline appears to have changed A LOT since the end of 6A.

After Buck arrived at Eddie’s house, Eddie asked him if he wanted a beer and Buck said he probably needed two.  When Eddie went into the kitchen and opened his fridge, his water pitcher was FULL and it was waiting for Buck the same way Eddie was, has been and still is waiting for him.

After Buck woke up and went into the kitchen, Eddie asked him if he still wanted a beer but Buck said, “Uh, maybe some water” and Eddie replied, “Agua on the way”.

Eddie poured Buck a glass of water, he pushed the glass over to him and Buck replied “Thank you” and drank it.  This is important because Eddie’s the only person who can give Buck what he needs. Buck was running on empty and he was tired from not being able to sleep the whole episode until he went to Eddie’s house.  He got the sleep he needed along with the water he needed too because he was at home with his future husband and their son.

When Buck went to his appointment with Dr. Salazar, he asked her if her patients who had near death experiences just returned to their lives as normal. Her answer included the way some of them do but she also said some of her patients quit their jobs, divorce their spouses along with the way a lot of them decide to take a trip to Italy. Buck said it was one place he’s never been then she said, “What I’ve learned from watching them is water finds it’s own levels and people do too”.  She went on to explain “Recovery is a bumpy road but eventually everyone finds their equilibrium”.

Dr. Salazar’s response to Buck about water levels is important because it highlights every instance of water that was included in the episode and how Buck is going to find his equilibrium once he’s done recovering.

Buck’s water pitcher was empty and neither he nor Maddie attempted to fill it.

Buck and Hen’s water glasses had equal amounts/levels of water in them.  Which could mean once Buck finds his equilibrium, he’ll be ready to enter his romantic relationship with Eddie.

Buck didn’t open the side of his fridge that had his water pitcher on it when Connor came over because Connor can’t give Buck what he needs.  Also, Buck doesn’t want anything from Connor since EDDIE HAS EVERYTHING HE NEEDS and he’s been waiting for Buck to stop searching for who and what are already right in front of him.

Eddie’s water pitcher was already FULL when Buck arrived so when Buck asked him for some water after he woke up, it was ready and waiting for him the same way Eddie’s been waiting for him since 6x1 “Let the Games Begin”.  Also, Buck drank the water and it replenished him and after he took a sip, he immediately asked Eddie about The Shooting (this topic will be expounded on in a different post).

For the entirety of season 6, Buck’s been searching for something, i.e., happiness, a family, job promotion and Eddie’s been waiting for him to realize everything he’s been searching for is right in front of him.  Eddie has everything Buck wants including a couch/relationship, water/everything he needs, love/Eddie, a son/Chris and a family/Eddie and Chris.  But Eddie’s going to keep waiting until he knows Buck is ready.  Buck’s not ready now because he’s empty and questioning everything about his life.  He’s scared, tired and frustrated but he knows one thing for sure, Eddie is his everything which explains the reason why he went to Eddie’s house instead of going anywhere else.  Eddie didn’t crowd Buck or show up at his loft unannounced.  He waited for him to come home and that’s exactly what Buck did.  Buck went home and slept on his own couch at Eddie’s house why because Buck said it himself in 3x11 “Seize the Day”, “This is Eddie’s house, I’m not really a guest”.

[ikamigami]

So I rewatched an episode "Is Sun okay?!" and I need to say this..

It's extremely obvious that Sun was lying to Moon and Solar..

And he has a drinking problem..

And he changed the address of the package so it would seem that the delivery service made a mistake..

And when he was asking who is buying so much alcohol weekly.. not monthly but WEEKLY.. he was asking for their opinion..

Sun isn't a good liar if it comes to lying to Moon..

So obviously when he heard their answer to "who would buy so much alcohol" being "an alcoholic" he started stuttering and his speach sounded more like a blabbering..

It's also worth pointing out that Sun asked Moon to specify what he meant by how many bottles he already drunk.. was he talking about that day or in general?

But don't you find it a little bit suspicious..?

Why did Sun ask Moon to specify his question?

Normally everyone would answer this question immediately.. so why Sun asked to specify the question? Why Sun said "you mean today.."?

If you were drinking a bottle of alcohol a day.. wouldn't you say that I only drank half of a bottle today or something like that..

So why Sun wanted to know if Moon meant that day?

I think that if we look at how much Sun's repeating lines such as "look how this bottle is so small" or "this is like a Caprisun to me" and the way he was saying it as if he was trying to convince Moon and Solar and maybe even himself that he doesn't drink much we can make a very good assumption that Sun has a drinking problem..

And yes, I fully believe that Sun was lying to Earth as well as I believe that he's drinking in secret and that he's most probably hiding his alcoholic beverages in other drinks.. for example tea..

And he still drunk that beer in that sushi restaurant..

I'm honestly disheartened by how both Solar and Earth literally just straight up ignored Moon's concerns regarding Sun's well-being..

I wouldn't be surprised (and I really hope tbh) if Moon was angry at Earth.. or maybe even at Solar (who knows when Eclipse will bring him back or how exactly it'll happen I'm just talking hypothetically) if something bad will happen to Sun because he'll do something reckless because of his problem with alcohol..

Moon have every right to be upset that everyone ignored his concerns regarding Sun who is his twin and whom he knows the most..

Sorry to Earth and Solar but they don't know Sun that much.. with how much Sun is hiding from Earth or just lying to her and with the fact that Solar never hang out with Sun just the two of them.. they just simply don't know Sun..

Even if Sun is hiding things from Moon and lie to him.. Moon still knows him better because of their bond - the special bond they share.. and also because Moon is spending the most time with Sun and also they live together in one house.. The rest isn't there with them..

And Moon is paying attention to Sun quite a lot (unlike Old Moon) cause he not only catch Sun on drinking but also he realized that Sun isn't socializing as much anymore and he even saw that Sun has self-destructive tendencies.. He said that he fully realized that when he was talking to Old Moon which means that he saw that but couldn't grasp it fully until the talk with Old Moon..

Moon was probably thinking about it in back of his head since Sun lied to him about the whole star conduit thing.. and later after the talk with Dark Sun.. Moon's fear only strengthened.. "it scares me".. Sun's self-destructive tendencies scare Moon..

And yet no one listens to Moon's very valid concerns..

And that's why I think that Sun will do something reckless and Moon will be angry that others just carelessly dismissed his concerns..

Or what if Sun died? It would be a lot worse.. Moon would be beyond angry that no one listened to him..

I don't know what Davis and EC will exactly do but I'm sure that big drama is awaiting us in the future.. and I can't wait to see it..

[andavs]

Genuine Beer in 9-1-1

There’s been a lot of talk about the Genuine beer that Buck and Eddie keep drinking, so I thought I’d make a post about it! But if we're talking about Genuine beer, I think it's only fair that we look at all of the other beer they use in the show too.

Just a quick note before we start: I don't think their prop department makes any of these. There are vendors that specialize in making props like this, and at least five of these come from the same company.

9-1-1 has a lot of commonly recurring brands of prop beer. They tend to use multiple brands at a time for variety, peaking at six used throughout 3b. There's also a bunch of one-offs they've only used once or twice that I didn't bother including here, and there's some that they've only used in the backgrounds, but I couldn't really read the labels.

They didn't really use prop beer bottles until Hen Begins (2.09), halfway through season 2. Most of the characters are shown drinking wine until Buck, Actually (2.08), and aside from one scene at the end of 1.10, those who do drink beer use a glass.

So without further ado: the beers of 9-1-1.

Blind Fox Ale is used mostly in seasons 2 and 3. As of 6.15, it's tied with Genuine for most uses, with main characters drinking it nine times. It's shown on screen even more in the background, and pops up in 5a when Michael's drinking one.

Alexander’s Famous Ale was used in a two episodes during season 2: Chim drinks it twice in Chimney Begins (2.12) and Athena and Hen drink it in Ocean's 9-1-1 (2.15). Red was drinking it at the bar in The One that Got Away (3.16). It's frequently used in the background by extras.

Grand Ale first popped up in Kids Today (3.01) and stayed through season 3. Chim drank it twice, Michael had it at a Grant-Nash family dinner, and Buck also drank it in Fools (3.12).

Cerveza Extra was used mostly in season three. Chimney was drinking one at the party for Buck in Kids Today (3.01), Buck had one sitting in front of him at the end of The Searchers (3.03), Chimney was making his way through several in Seize the Day (3.11) and Buck has one in front of him during the party at Eddie's later that episode. Buck also served it to Connor in Peru in Buck Begins (4.05).

Mendoza Lager was added in season 5 and these are the three times we've seen it: Buck drinks it in Outside Looking In (5.11) while the team is at the bar, he drinks it again on the balcony with Maddie in Starting Over (5.18), and in Tomorrow (6.06), Hen was drinking it when she first met Karen.

Rio Negro has been used a few times, and so far, Eddie’s the only main character who drinks it. Lena had one with him at the junkyard fight in Rage (3.05), he had one or two at the bar in Seize the Day (3.11) (and extras were also holding it during the party at his house later that episode), and he also drank it in Texas with his family in Hero Complex (5.17). As far as I can tell, this is the only beer that's this character-specific.

Tux’s Red Ribbon was used once in season 1 at the very end of A Whole New You (1.10), when Chim was hosting a party. I didn't notice it again until In Another Life (6.11), where it was the only brand of beer anyone drank in Buck's coma dream. I'm wondering if they used it in the coma dream because they don't normally use it, to subtly emphasize that things are wrong, or if we're going to see it again sometime soon.

Which brings me to Genuine.

The first time I found Genuine being used is back in Hen Begins (2.09). It’s in the scene where she goes out with Athena, Bethanne (the female cop), and Casey (the gay firefighter). She’s the only one at their table drinking Genuine, though Casey also has a beer in a pint glass. That extra behind her looks like they might have it too.

Note: this isn't the only brand to be used once earlier and then resurrected later; Tux's was used once in season one, and then again in season 6.

After that the show used other brands and I didn’t see it again until Fear-a-Phobia (5.13) when Chim and Hen drink it during their reunion.

Buck and Eddie drink it in Let the Games Begin (6.01).

The guy who blew up his cheating neighbor in Crash & Learn (6.02) was drinking Genuine.

Buck gave one to Connor in Recovery (6.12). It wasn’t in his fridge a few scenes before when Maddie was stocking it for him (meaningful or continuity error?).

Eddie had it in his fridge later in Recovery and grabbed two for him and Buck, but drank both himself when Buck fell asleep.

Buck and Eddie were both drinking one while helping Chris with homework in Mixed Feelings (6.13).

And Eddie had it again at the poker game. (Many of the extras around them were also drinking Genuine.)

Eddie also had it in his fridge while on the phone with his mom in 6.15, and it's still there when he calls her again at the end.

It's shown in Maddie and Chimney's fridge at the end of 6.16.

All that kind of makes it seem like we're seeing it a lot more often lately, like maybe it's a sign of something building. Of the three beer brands we've seen the main characters drink in season 6, Genuine shows up the most by a wide margin. Mendoza Lager has only been in one scene, and Tux's in two (both in the coma dream).

So is it a sign of something being genuine? Uncovering something genuine? Their prop beer budget got cut and they can only afford one brand? Just the latest favorite in their rotation of prop beers and it doesn't mean anything at all? You be the judge!

(It seems like they try to cycle through brands for the core seven characters to drink every season or two. The ones that were most prevalent in seasons 2 and 3 still occasionally pop up in the background in later seasons, especially in bar scenes, or for characters like Michael and Red. And once you notice them, then you too might find yourself pointing excitedly when you spot a rogue Alexander's Famous Ale on a passing server's tray for the first time in two seasons.)

Bonus unrelated discovery from my search: Back in Hen Begins, Hen had the frog sponge holder first.

[halliescomut]

In Defense of Wedding Plan....or Lom, more specifically...

So, I actually don't see a lot of discourse on here about Wedding Plan...maybe I just haven't been on here as much. But also, there are a lot of deeper shows on at the moment that are tackling more ethereal ideas and Wedding Plan is more pulp-y romcom than anything else, so it's not necessarily ripe for deep discussion. But on tiktok where I'm fairly active in the BL community I have seen so much hate on this show. And I understand certain levels of frustration about the choice of storyline, but I also get frustrated because I feel like people are purposely disregarding several things.

(Editors note from right before I post this, I was going to add visuals, but I'm too emotionally exhausted now, so you'll just have to settle for the wall of text.)

I agree that it's not good, or right, or acceptable for Lom to have lied to Nuea. But there's been behavior that acts as though Lom is cheating...he's not in a romantic relationship with Yiwa!! He can't cheat on her. And yes, it does lead Nuea to believe he's at least attempting to cheat, but that's not the same. I recognize that Nuea would not feel great about his feelings towards Lom, both because of their professional relationship and what he is assuming about Lom and Yiwa's private relationship. But that's also a nuanced discussion in and of itself because Nuea knows there's something fishy going on with Lom's engagement. He doesn't know what, but he definitely suspects, I think from as early as episode 2. They go out of their way to set up in episode one his sort of sixth sense about couples with that McDonald's scene. Their intention is for us to see how observant Nuea is.

And watching this most recent episode (episode 6) as soon as Lom revealed that he fell for Nuea at Pai's wedding and said that he watched him, I knew that the comments were going to be out of pocket. It is not weird or stalker-ish to see a person that you find attractive out in the wild and look at them or watch them. That's straight up normal. I have done that. Now do I truly believe it was love at first sight? No, because I don't think you can love a person without knowing them, but this is also romantic fiction and love at first sight is literally the most common trope there is. It's also not weird or gross or stalker-ish for him to get Nuea's company contact info from Pai. If you like someone and you know that your friend has their contact info...asking them is not weird. I'd maybe be a bit iffy on a direct phone number, but a insta or snapchat name, a Line ID, that's not sus...like at all. He didn't hand over Nuea's personal address or something. And let's also remember that Prapai KNOWS Lom. They are friends. He knows that Lom is not a dangerous person, he doesn't pose harm to Nuea.

I'd also like to discuss episode 4/5...the first NC scene. I keep seeing comments about dubious consent or lack of consent altogether, and while I can agree with dubious...it's on Lom's part. When you watch the end of episode 4, Nuea isn't drunk. Like we're not given a clear shot of the table, but you see Lom with 3 empty beer glasses and drinking a 4th when Nuea shows up. Nuea you only see drink one, out of a short, mixed drink style glass, one you'd have like a Rum & Coke in, and the beverage is clear with a lemon wedge, so it's not even clear if it's alcoholic. But even if it was there are 3 total glasses like it on the table, so assuming Nuea drank all three, he'd have had to take them all back to back to back in order to be wasted after that. But beyond the context clues, his behavior does not indicate inebriation at all. He's steady on his feet, he's not slurring, there are no acting choices made that would lead one to believe he's drunk.

The fallout that comes for Nuea after that night isn't because of concerns about consent issues. It's about reconciling a destructive decision. People make bad choices all the time. They'll get caught up in an emotion, an idea, a person, and they'll do something without truly thinking about the consequences. And eventually it's morning and you have to accept the choice you made. Is it heartbreaking to watch that with Nuea? Absolutely. I cried at that scene. Pak did such an amazing job. And Nuea isn't the only one who suffers from that emotional fallout. We see the fear and distress on Lom's face when he wakes up and Nuea is gone. You can see his distress when talking to Nuea's boss. He tries to pull the rich guy privilege BS (which I will absolutely admit I hated), but she's not falling for it. After the boss learns everything, she gives Lom the contact info for Nuea's family, which again pissed a lot of people off. But again, it's not direct contact or access to him. She also knows that Nuea is in a place where he is safe and has a support system around him. Also Lom, while not a super clear thinking dude in that moment, is not a freaking serial killer and Nuea's boss is not an imbecile. She didn't just cave to Lom's puppydog eyes, and it feels kind of dismissive to me for people to act like she did.

So many people were upset that he followed Nuea to Chiang Mai...like...it's the same argument we heard about Pai for several episodes. If those things don't happen, there's no fucking show. If Lom stays in Bangkok and Nuea stays in Chiang Mai until the wedding has happened then the story just ends. And if you feel like there's no redemption for Lom after withholding the full truth from Nuea... why are you even still watching the show? Legitimately why? Because what is your expectation when you don't truly believe there's a way for Lom to be redeemed at all?

And I'll be honest, seeing the pretty dismissive reactions to Lom telling the whole story about him and Yiwa coming to the realization that their parents wouldn't be able to accept their sexuality, it really kind of hurts. I know in a lot of ways it feels easy to believe that the reason they hid it is because they didn't want to lose their inheritance, but have you considered that maybe they do love their parents? At least a little? I know that especially for many people in western audiences it seems easy and simple to say "just leave then" in response to queer people who stay closeted because of their families, but there are always going to be so many layers to that. Especially when you look at through a cultural context lens. It's really just is not that simple. Money creates a lot of privilege, that's very true. But we can also look at real life people for whom that money isn't clearing the way for them to live their life fully openly. You can literally look at PP Kritt and see that despite his privilege, fame, and familial wealth, he is still dealing with consistent societal discrimination.

I also don't love this narrative that Yiwa is being selfish. The arrangement was mutually agreed upon, by both of them. To keep each other's secrets and let Yiwa have her love. Does that seem unfair to Lom? Yeah, but he wouldn't have seen it that way prior to meeting Nuea. He wasn't expecting to ever get anything remotely close to a happily ever after, so it wasn't truly a sacrifice to him when he made that agreement.

And this also circles back to his comment about saying that he wanted Nuea even though he was getting married, because he just wanted that one moment of happiness. Is it a selfish idea? Yes, but to be shocked that a rich, privileged man exhibited selfishness is a bit much. But also, I don't think Lom was expecting to fall for Nuea. Like I said, I don't really think it was love at first sight, but lust. I think the more time he spent with Nuea the deeper he fell. I believe his intention was to have something along the lines of a fling, and that when it was over Nuea would move on from him and find his eventual happily ever after and he would settle for memories. That's part of why I think he withheld the truth even after Yiwa told him it was okay to tell Nuea the full truth. This is a man who never expected to find joy or a true partner but was willing to go to extreme's to help the person he sees as a sister have the opportunity to have her own happiness. But yeah, he's just a shitbag.

And the references to love-bombing...I hate how people have brought that term into the discussion of the last two episodes. So if you're not familiar with the term, it's become more common on social media in the discussion around narcissistic and abusive partners. It generally refers to overwhelming physical displays of affection like gifts and such, especially early on in a relationship, essentially with the intention of creating a power imbalance in favor of the narcissistic partner.

The following are the most common signs of love-bombing:

They give you needless gifts 

They’re in a rush to lock things down 

They’re always available and demanding of your attention 

They can’t take ‘no’ for an answer 

They like you better when you’re alone 

They over-communicate their love for you 

You feel overwhelmed, uneasy or off-balance 

These are not things that Lom is doing. Buying McDonalds and ice cream for someone so they know you care...that's not love-bombing, that's at best wooing. Especially when intent is part of why it matters. Lom is doing it to show he cares, to show he pays attention to what Nuea likes, not in an attempt to make Nuea feel indebted to him for said gifts (that total up to about $10). Lom isn't trying to lock things down with Nuea, he's not attempting to force Nuea to choose him. He just wants Nuea to make the decision to either choose him or not knowing his love is genuine. He wants Nuea to be making an informed decision. He does not demand Nuea's attention, at most he requests it sometimes. He takes 'no' for an answer pretty regularly. He doesn't purposely or intentionally try to get Nuea alone. 'They over-communicate their love'...this one seems iffy, but it's not about saying "I love you" to a person, it's more related to presenting that love to others to cement a relationship. Essentially trying to make it awkward for a person to say 'oh well we're not quite that serious'. And that last one...Nuea is reflective and considering of the situation as a whole, but he's not uneasy, he's not overwhelmed. You could maybe argue afraid, but not of Lom, he's afraid of potential future heartbreak. Love itself is scary. Feelings of that depth and strength are scary. Because we all know that even if that love lasts the rest of your lives, the length of your lives is never guaranteed, and loss is ALWAYS a potential outcome.

I'm not arguing that the show is without flaws, all of Mame's shows/stories are flawed. But I do feel like there was a level of expectation that seems entirely misplaced. Like, these same people who love Payu and Rain to death, had nothing to say to the reveal that Payu had orchestrated at least one instance of a run-in with Rain, a person with whom there was a far larger power imbalance, but Lom pursuing Nuea, a grown ass adult who is never afraid to speak his mind to Lom, that's too problematic???

I don't know anymore. I like the show. It has faults, and flaws, and so do it's characters, but Lom is not a fucking mustache twirling villain out to trick and capture poor, sweet, stupid Nuea. And that's kind of how it feels like the discussions about the show have been going.

[redlettermediathings]

A wise man once said, “Brevity is the soul of wit.” Well, if that’s the case, judging by the length of this video these are four of the most witless clown-fools on the internet today. Mike, Jay, Jack and Rich Evans are perhaps the dumbest humans that have ever krebbed in my shorts. Hi I’m retired underground illegal casino pit boss Krebs Gorlon, and today I write to you from my home in war-torn Haiti to tell you about this newest episode of Best of the Worst. I'm farting as I type this due to the bacteria ravaging my colon, but I will try to make sense. Boy, it sure has been a long time since we’ve seen the boys watch three feature films, eh? But alas, today they are spinning the Wheel of the Worst™ again... There’s something about old, undiscovered tapes that makes my taint tingle with the titillating excitement of that first time I killed a man. Rich and Jack display a palpable level of non-excitement at this prospect in our video’s opening. Trust me, I get it. Sometimes these tapes can be a nightmare. Sometimes they can be a lot of fun though. It’s about as exciting as being forced to play a game of Russian Roulette with your precious time and sanity. Mike (the ugly fat one) appears to be the most unhinged of them all in this episode. You see Jay (the hippie clown) had haplessly purchased a case of “Hazy IPAs”. Silly little man that he is, he purchased solely on the style of the packaging. A lovely hazy as it is though. Voodoo Ranger’s Tropical Force. A product made by New Belgium brewing. Note: They are a NON-Sponsor. In fact, we’ll probably get sued showing what vile filth comes out of Mike’s mouth after drinking a dozen of these. So essentially what was cut from the video was Mike berating Jay on his foolish purchase. You see, the supply in the RLM booze fridge with thin at best. Jay bought beer cause he liked the green/yellow package design and was thrilled at the sight of a skeleton aviator on the can. What he didn’t check was the ABV, which is at a very healthy 9.5%. Mike’s been around the block a few times more than Jay so that’s the very first thing Mike checks. After our Half in the Bag “What are these super bottles?!” incident when Mike accidentally drank 9 beers that were 12%, he knows to check. ABV stands for alcohol by volume. It also stands for how soon Mike becomes a slurring monster who can’t say the word “apartment” and passes out into a bonfire suffering 2nd degree burns on his wang and dumplings – rendering all his man-parts useless. However, Mike faced a difficult choice: Deal with the unbearable state of sobriety or drink the beers that are 9.5% and hope for the best. He chose the latter. Krebs does not approve. The results will be apparent as the night goes on. In the end though, what we have here is another classic Wheel of the Worst. So settle in for the next 90 minutes with your favorite beverage and snack and prepare to laugh, cry, and soil yourself with laughter that will give you nightmares for the rest of your sad lives.

[thewayuarent]

Definitely agree that it’s a unique different experience for everyone because my parents who also suffered from substance-abuse issues and got clean for us still drank nonalcoholic beer like you said your dad does. And it worked for them too so I definitely get you. I also agree with you that we don’t have a lot of time to delve into it and the exact mechanisms that Ray is taking in his recovery so they might not exactly let us know what his method is. But we’ll see. Thank you for the answer though!

On an unrelated note for some reason my mind told me that it might be a continuity error. I only say that because I feel like we’ve had quite a few of them in the show even last episode with Ray wearing the same outfit he was wearing talking to Mew at the end of ep 9 when he agrees to go to rehab in the car scene in ep 10. So maybe it’s scene they filmed that doesn’t focus on Ray’s addiction and they forgot at that moment he shouldn’t be drinking? Not sure how much sense that makes but I was just thinking about the continuity eras on the show and that thought came to me.

Thank you for your question :)

As far as we know it can be continuity mistake, it can be flashback, or Ray’s imagination - it can be literally anything I won’t be surprised at all. But honestly it’s like a whole scene. I don’t think they randomly forgot that Ray is in his rehab era while filming, at least I hope so. It’s kind of a huge deal for him.

With the outfit, well, it doesn’t bother me that much cause they can wear the same clothes, you know? It’s funny tho that this is the scene where Ray agrees to go to rehab for the first time - which is huge step both for him and for their relationship with Sand - and it’s not only Ray wears the same outfit as in the scene when he admits he chose Sand over Mew, but Sand wears the same outfit he was when he said Ray is his 25th hour.

I don’t think they did it on purpose to show the *metaphor about choice* but I find it unnecessary funny. So, I connected the dots that don’t mean to be connected xD

[saltygilmores]

Gilmore Girls-Season 2-Episode 5

In 2020, I reviewed Gilmore Girls episodes on Twitter. I'm reposting them here in all of their snarky glory.

*phone rings at Luke's diner* Oh the fateful phone call. Poor Jess. What did he ever do so bad to deserve getting sent to this Connecticut hell hole? Find it weird that Jess had never been to Stars Hollow and met the Gilmores at any point in his 17 years on earth. Lorelai says "Oh your nephew" like she kind of knows he exists but then asks Luke a lot of basic questions about him she should already have known since she NEVER stops talking to him. I can't believe in her many years of being Luke's most annoying and pestering customer she's never thought to ask him any questions about his family. I suppose you could chalk this one up to Luke and his penchant for not opening up to people.

They retconned this: here he says Liz and Jimmy were married until Jess was 15, but then later we find out Jimmy left when Jess was born. The show runners were like, eh, a kid having parents who divorce when he's 15 is pretty sucky, but it's not nearly tragic enough. *scribbles out script* How about his Dad left him after he was born after saying he was going out to buy diapers, his Mom is an alcoholic who drank while she was pregnant with him and racked up 4 more husbands including one who died and who will go on to have another child that is the light of her life? That'll do nicely. "I'm sure she put at least 5 or 6 minutes of thought into (her decision to leave Jess). You're being too generous Luke. I'm observing the groceries Luke bought home. Are you trying to put your nephew into a sugar coma? Two varieties of Rice Krispie treats, a pint of ice cream, Pop Tarts Pastries. And a bottle of Vitamins for balance. "He's been staying out late. Getting rowdy." Oh no. not Getting rowdy. What did he do, get wild at a 24 Hour Barnes and Noble? Baby is a socially anxious introvert. Dictionary defines rowdy as "noisy and disorderly." He is the most pathetic excuse for a juvenile delinquent. At the end of season 3 he goes to a wild keg party and talks to no one but Rory the whole time. I watched Jack Pearson die yesterday and Jess Mariano arrive today. Milo out, Milo in. Hehehehe.

I love that "This is Hell" begins to play as he takes in the town. You don't know the half of it yet kid.

Okay, okay, slow down a little on the cigarettes kiddo, look how many are on that ashtray...errr, paper plate? This meal is CHAOS. He has what looks to me to be a bowl of walnuts and the bowl looks like a hollowed out tree trunk? Plus, some dry cereal that looks like it's on a yellow heart shaped plate? No milk or spoon. And an empty can of either beer or ginger ale. Balanced Breakfast!

"You'll like Rory. She's like Lorelai, except she has a slighty tighter grasp on reality." LOL

Boy howdy, are you two about to board a rollercoaster ride. Buckle in.

With you Jess? Anytime. Let's go.

He's drinkin a beer! Watch out! This boy is out of control! Lorelai: "Dean would NEVER drink a beer!" Okay, I made that up but I'd throw money into the ring that she says it at some point. This is probably the nicest Lorelai will ever be to Jess from here on out so I may as well enjoy this.

Okay, Jess was a prick in that scene. But I have some sympathy for him and what he's been through, at least. I don't feel quite so bad when DEAN talks to Lorelai like that. And all she does to Dean is give him a pat on the head and a cupcake.

How many times has Lorelai boycotted Luke's because something happened to make things awkward with him?

1) As always I encourage all forms of theft from Taylor and 2) I encourage any sort of theft to take away money from repairing that god damn bridge because the town is run by a bunch of idiots who wouldn't know how to budget for such a minor thing to save their lives so screw em. That god damn bridge STILL isn't fixed well into the later seasons because I started my Twitter-Review journey at the end of season 5, and I remember fundraisers were still going on for it afterwards! Fuck the Stars Hollow Bridge!

I guess Liz also neglected Jess to the point that she never bought him new clothes when he had a growth spurt. I'm saying that sweater is TITE. I am convinced after this episode the wardrobe dept realized Milo was way too buff to look 17 years old and that was the end of the tights sweaters. Nothing but baggy clothes and big ugly coats from here on out. The only thing better than Jess is the banter between Jess and Luke. I absolutely buy that Jess is Luke's nephew. Perfect character. Perfect casting. Perfect chemistry between the two actors. But he's nothing like either of his "parents" though so go figure. Would have made more sense to cast him as Luke's son. I don't believe that Middle of Nowhere Stars Hell-ow would have anyone who could recite The Pledge in 6 different languages. That sounds wayyy more like a Chilton thing. I also don't think someone like Jess who likely went to diverse schools in New York City would think it was unsuual or something to complain about.

The bridge looks fine to me. What is The Bridge Repair Fund a front for, Taylor? "Nowhere in either Stars Hollow or it's surrounding counties can you get a decent cup of coffee." If you look closely, you may spot this can in Luke's in a few early episodes (in later episodes, it's a red plastic carton of Folgers coffee with the label peeled off). If you're not American, let me fill you in: Hills Brothers and Folgers are both dirt cheap brands of coffee you can find in Walmart or literally any other supermarket in the country. Head on down to the Stars Hollow Walmart, Lor. $7.84 for this can. I looked it up.

Lorelai is then seen pouring coffee into her machine from a small white bag that is probably way fancier than anything Luke serves. Also, Idk the first thing about coffee but do you really keep it in the fridge?

She's a FRAUD! And Luke's a FRAUD for serving supermarket coffee and acting like it's his special blend!

I noticed he stole a gnome, not a yacht.

How bad can he be? He does MAGIC TRICKS! Cammmonn.

If I were Rory, Dean would have been deleted from my memory at this point. Dean WHO?

[loveyourownsmiilee]

Ok quick little Manager Rebecca update. She was on vacation for a week and is now on episode 4.12!! And boy does she have a lot of thoughts 😂

In regards to the kitchen scene™️:

“Alright sweetheart they were flirting in the kitchen right? I mean Buck did that cutesy eyelash thing I’ve seen him do with people he’s into. He’s into Eddie he’s gotta be. And Eddie was so turned on in my opinion. The way he drank the beer was very seductive that I felt like I was seconds away from them fucking on that kitchen island oh my god. Even my husband said that was very gay of them and that he was disappointed they didn’t fuck. But I guess their son was in the other room so it makes sense. Oh gosh I forgot Chris was there so I’m sure they also forgot he was there.”

In regards to the skateboard scene:

“I just gotta say that Buck is shaping up to be such a good dad got Chris. The way he researched and found a way for the kid to skateboard safely was so thoughtful. And he was simultaneously showing Eddie he’s the better option in regards to that new teacher. They were such a cute happy little family.”

In regards to the entirety of Eddie Begins:

“WHEN I TELL YOU I LOST MY SHIT I MEAN IT. BUCK WAS DIGGING FOR EDDIE WITH HIS BARE HANDS??? Not gonna lie my husband was like, ‘idk if if even do that for you damn that’s love’!!! Oh Buck is so gone on Eddie. It’s sad and cute bc Eddie almost died and like all of his memories that brought him back were OF CHRIS AND BUCK. SO THAT IS HIS FAMILY!! Right?!? Buck is the equivalent of a life partner for Eddie. I cried I really cried because Buck didn’t give up and Eddie didn’t either and he saved himself to come home to his family. My stupid husband would never.”

In regards to the train derailment:

“Ok all I gotta say is Eddie was so fucking jealous over Abby and I loved every second. It was the first time I actually got to witness Eddie having some sort of actual feelings for Buck. I mean heart eyes aside, he was both worried and jealous because Buck is kinda his guy you know? And I’m sure he didn’t wanna lose his guy to what he thinks was Buck’s first love. Oh I loved every moment of that. I’m glad she’s gone and we got to see Buck, Eddie, and Chris all happy in the end. Such a cute family honestly.”

In regards to season 4:

“I’m certain Eddie and Buck slept in the same bed during quarantine. You can’t convince me otherwise sweety. Also, Eddie being so protective and in love during Buck’s backstory was so nice. Idk about you but I think Eddie was checking him out when he was boxing in those super short shorts!!! But ugh Eddie is with the teacher and they threw me off because I swear he keeps looking at Buck like he’s gonna drop down on one knee and propose any second. They’re such a cute family. I need the teacher to leave so they can live happily ever after. And bleh the reporter is back and I cannot stand her. Please tell me her and Buck stay friends???? She’s in this treasure hunt episode and I’m already over her!! BUT I think Eddie is super fucking jealous and that’s why he wanted to work with Buck. He’s so gone on Buck that he didn’t even remember his girlfriend lol.”

GUYS SHE IS ALMOST AT THE SHOOTING EPISODES🥲

[felicitysmoaksx]

Hi everyone! You're all probably wondering what this story is. Or if you're following me on Tumblr you might already know what is happening with this story. But the gist of it is I was rereading the original story about a month ago and decided that while I liked the writing there, I knew I could do better.

So that's what I did. I redid the entire outline and completely rebuilt the story. Now some of the story is the same. But I think with the extra scenes I've added and the scenes I've reordered/and or taken away, it's a lot better.

But I guess you will all be the judge of that. Nevertheless, I hope you all enjoy it and I appreciate any feedback you have! 

Summary: With Adam and Hailey still together, what if after the crossover episodes, Kim went home with Jay instead?

Word Count: 4.7k

Warnings: Vague allusions to a kidnapping and sexual abuse case. But don't go into great detail.

Read On AO3 | Fic Playlist

It Was a One Night Stand Until I Woke Up Next to You

Kim was busy packing up her stuff after a long, long, long three days of work. One long for each day she couldn’t go home because of this stupid case. She had just opened her locker when Hailey called her name.

“We’re going to Molly’s for a beer, you want to join us?” The blonde offered. Glancing at Upton’s and Ruzek’s joined hands, Kim gave the new couple a tight smile.

“Thanks, but I think I just want my couch, a beer, and a quiet night in.” It wasn’t a complete lie, Kim just didn’t tell them that she also didn’t want to be a third wheel to her ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend. (Even though she was completely okay with them being a them by now. But it was still weird to be going on what seemed like a date for them)

“Okay if you’re sure,” Upton gave her another smile before Adam pulled her away and out the back door, “See you on Monday, Burgess.”

“Bye Kim,” Adam called on their way out. Shaking her head, Kim started to gather her things when Jay walked in with a bandaged hand.

“They released you, already?” Kim questioned when she saw Jay walk into the locker room. She thought for sure they would keep him overnight for observation.

“Perks of having a doctor for a brother. I talked him into talking my actual doctor into discharging me early. It was just a few stitches anyway. You all got to me before I could actually spray anything into it. Plus they needed the bed.” Jay explained, showing her his hand before he started to pack up his things for the night.

“Well, you just missed Hailey and Adam. They were going to Molly’s if you want to catch up with them.” Kim slung her bag over her shoulder with a sigh. It had been a long night and a lot of overtime. (Two nights worth to be exact)

“Why didn’t you go with them?”

“Didn’t want to be a third wheel.”

“And you think I do?” Jay asked incredulously.

“I’m fine with them being a them, but I’m still Adam’s ex-girlfriend. It wouldn’t be that awkward for you. You’re Upton’s old partner. Not her ex-boyfriend.”

Kim heard the detective yawn, “It’s been a long night. I think I just want my couch and a beer.”

“That’s my plan too.” She told him, swinging her locker door shut, “I have to stop and buy some though. Kev drank the last of mine.”

“You could come over to my place if you want to.” Jay offered as Kim started to turn the corner of a row of lockers.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. That way you wouldn’t have to stop and I don’t think any of us should be by ourselves anyway. At least not tonight.”

So that’s how she ended up following Jay back to his apartment and sitting on his couch as he got them both a beer.

A few hours later and another beer later, Kim was laughing at him as he told her a story about Mouse dragging his ass around one day in basic training because he was a stupid twenty-one-year-old who didn’t know his limit yet. They were swapping stories-him about his ranger days and her about being a flight attendant. Another few hours. Another beer.

Kim had been laughing at another one of his stories, sitting with her legs crossed on top of the couch, facing him so it wasn’t a wonder that amid her laughter, she had started to topple over. His hands were there steadying her as he also chuckled. Then it tapered off and faded completely. She glanced up at him just in time to see him lick his lips, and okay maybe liquid courage helped her lean up and press her lips against his.

Jay responded immediately, wrapping his arms around her waist. His hand slipped under her shirt, so it was touching the bare skin of her back as he brought her to sit on his lap.

“Wait...What are...we...doing?” Kim panted in between kisses. Jay pulled away to look at her. He exhaled and she felt it on her lips. Goosebumps started pebbling all over her arms. She shivered in his arms at the warming chill that ran down her spine.

“I don’t know,” he admitted to her, “But after the last few days, this feels right.”

Kim nodded her head. She understood what he was saying. After this last case, they needed something to remind them that no matter what evil they saw on their job, they had something to remind them everything wasn’t evil. Was this a healthy coping mechanism? Probably not. But right now, it wasn’t about that. It was about feeling something. She leaned in to kiss him again and he returned it eagerly before he pulled away to study her, when she started to pull his shirt up.

“How drunk are you? Are you sure you want to do this? I don’t want you regretting this tomorrow.” He told her. Kim shook her head. She wasn’t drunk. Every beer she had that night, had been spaced out enough that she hadn’t gotten drunk. Just buzzed.

“Buzzed. Just enough to be brave enough to do this.” She answered, before turning the question back on him.

“Same, I just wanted to check before we got any farther.” He answered, then he leaned in to kiss her neck. Jay gripped the back of her thighs before he was standing and making his way to his bedroom. Should they have been concerned that they forgot about protection? Probably, but it was fine. Kim was on birth control… If only Kim hadn’t forgotten to take it in the midst of everything that had happened today.

After that night, Kim and Jay went back to normal more or less. They had no reason to drag it out or act out of the ordinary. They both agreed that night was about comfort for them and nothing else. Until four weeks later, when Kim was chasing a suspect for a case and had gone through a fence, cutting her arm open. It wasn’t a cut that deep, but Voight still insisted she go get it stitched up.

At Med, a standard blood workout revealed a lot more than Kim was ready for that morning.

“Congratulations are in order.” Her ER doctor told her with a warm smile. Then at Kim’s look of confusion, the doctor explained. “Your HBC levels are elevated.”

“I’m sorry?” Kim asked confusedly, Her doctor’s smile broadened, “Whenever someone comes into the ED we do a general work-up. It’s standard procedure, but your HBC levels are slightly elevated. It means your pregnant Ms. Burgess.”

“I-what? Pregnant? Are you sure? Because I’m on birth control and besides I haven’t had sex in…” Kim trailed off. She was about to say she hadn’t had sex in months. Not since Matt...but that wasn’t true.

She had slept with Jay four weeks ago. She met the doctor’s now slightly concerned stare again. “Are you sure?”

The other woman nodded, “Yes. These tests are fairly accurate. By your levels, I’d say, you’re-” she glanced back down at Kim’s chart, “-Four weeks along?”

Kim’s hand fell to her stomach subconsciously. She knew that if she was pregnant, who the father would be. She had only slept with one guy recently. She was carrying a Baby Halstead.

Their case had somehow turned into a SA  case before she could even leave the hospital. A girl had been held in a storm cellar for four years. She had been seventeen when she was taken. She got a call that Hailey would meet her at the hospital because they needed to interview the victim that had been taken to Med.

“You okay?” Hailey asked when Kim found her. Kim nodded, but the other woman stared at her, looking unsure. “You sure? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

She hadn’t. Instead, she had seen the opposite of a ghost, but she guessed the expressions looked the same.

“Yeah,” she nodded. Then again more firmly, “Yeah, I’m good. What do we got? Kev just said it was a SA case now.”

“And a kidnapping. Vic was seventeen when she was taken.” Hailey explained as they walked to the victim’s hospital room. And it gets worse, we also have a missing four-year-old too. And the kid needs insulin every few hours or he goes into shock. Our offender, also the dad, didn’t take it when he left with the boy.”  

Kim shook her head, trying to get a grip on this case as well as dealing with being pregnant. She always wanted kids, to be a mother someday. When she had been engaged to Adam, they had always…And now was not the time to have that thought with Ruzek’s current girlfriend standing right next to her. The point was, yeah. She wanted kids, but she never pictured it like this.

Kim bit her lip as her eyes followed Jay as he made his way out of the bullpen that night. It had been weighing on her mind since she found out this morning. She was about four weeks pregnant...with baby Halstead. And she needed to tell the father.

“Hey!” Kim called after she stood and hurried after him because if she didn’t do it now, she’d chicken out later, “Jay! Wait up!”

It was better just to rip the bandaid off.

“Hey, can I talk to you? In private? It’s important.” She told him when she reached the bottom step of the stairs. He nodded in the direction of the parking lot. “Walk with me to my car?”

Rip the bandaid off. Rip the bandaid off. Rip the bandaid off. She repeated the mantra in her head as she followed him to his truck.

“You okay? You’re being a little quiet.” Kim looked up to see the detective eyeing her. She swallowed the nerves that appeared in her throat...Or was that nausea? Did morning sickness start this early in the pregnancy? She needed to buy one of those books now.

“Kim?”

“I’m pregnant.” She blurted out before she winced at her ungraceful delivery of the news. At least she had ripped the bandaid off. Kim shook her head at herself and then continued, not daring to look up at Jay and see his reaction. Instead, she chose to look at her shoes.

“They told me today at the hospital. When I was getting my stitches done after my run-in with the fence, they did a standard blood workup and my HBC levels whatever those mean, came back elevated, and with how elevated they estimated around four weeks-”

“Which would make them mine.” Jay finished her ramble softly because it had been four weeks since they slept together. Now she looked up at him, at his face. To his credit, she couldn’t see a negative reaction in his face.  Not even a whisper of one. Instead, his blue eyes (would their child have his blue eyes or her brown ones) were thoughtful as he processed the information.

“Yeah,” Kim nodded, answering in a quiet voice, even though he hadn’t asked a question.

“Are you keeping them?”

Kim nodded. Though she might have had some lingering doubts before, the case today with Claire and Henry. Seeing how that mother and son had interacted solidified her decision. “Yeah. Yes, I am.”

“Then do you want to go somewhere and talk? About how we’re going to do this?”

Kim felt the tension release from her shoulders. She knew Jay was a good guy. The type of guy who would take responsibility and step up. The kind of guy that wouldn’t let her do this by herself, especially with this baby being his. But there was a difference between knowing that and hearing that she wasn’t going to be on her own were two different things.

“You could drive me home? I carpooled with Upton and Rojas today. And we could order dinner?” She offered and he nodded.

“Okay just let me go clock out and let them know while I’m in there.”

“Do you want a beer? Water? Or something else? I think I have some kind of soda?” She offered when they reached her apartment. Jay walked in behind her, setting their greasy takeout food from the burger place they had stopped at, on her kitchen table.

“Sure,” Jay said, accepting the plates she was giving him. He separated their food while she went to her fridge.

“So,” she said as she came back with two bottles in her hands, one a plastic water bottle and one a glass beer bottle. She handed him the beer before she took a seat across from him. “I’m not actually sure where to go from here. I know you said you wanted to be involved, but I’m not expecting-”

“Kim, I’m going to stop you right there. I don’t want an out with this. It took both of us to make that baby. We both chose to sleep together that night, so we’re in this together. Everything that comes with it. Doctor appointments, getting the nursery ready, 3 am calls where you call me because you have cravings, those stupid classes that teach you how to breathe if you want to take them…all of it.”

“…We won’t be able to hear the heartbeat until the next appointment at the earliest,” Jay said, reading information about her first official appointment on his phone. Kim blinked, she didn’t know where or why that day had resurfaced.

“Yeah, that's not till the next appointment at twelve weeks. This appointment is to just basically make sure that the baby is healthy and safe, growing at the rate they should be, and to talk about our family’s health histories and they address any concerns we have.” Kim explained, remembering what she had read last night in her new book about pregnancy and babies.

She had put off reading for the last two weeks, yet when the appointment reminder popped up on her phone yesterday, she realized she didn’t know what she was walking into. She absolutely hated not feeling prepared. It was like walking into a suspect’s house without knowing what to expect.

“You didn’t have to come you know. It’s not like it’s a huge appointment.” Kim told them nonchalantly as she began to flick through a magazine before she abandoned it in favor of playing a game on her phone.

“Every appointment Kim. No matter how big or small.” He told her, staring at the pictures of babies, “Because we’re-”

“-In this together. You know, you’re going to sound like a broken record by the time this whole pregnancy is over with.”

Soon Kim’s name was called and they were ushered back into a room. They didn’t even see her OB for this appointment. A technician conducted the ultrasound. The baby as expected was growing and progressing right on schedule.

“We’ll see you for the next appointment.” The tech said as she smiled, handing Kim a set of pictures, “Six weeks from today you can schedule it with the woman at the front desk.”

“So Burgess, what is up with you and Halstead? I noticed you and him have been a little…closer lately. Anything you want to tell me?” Kevin pointed at her with his fork. Kim rolled her eyes at her best friend’s roundabout way of asking if she and Jay were dating, without actually asking.

It was her and Kevin’s dinner that they did every month since their patrol partnership ended six years ago. Spearing her hamburger patty (Because she had entered the eighth week of her pregnancy and with that came morning sickness with a vengeance. Her baby seemed to have an aversion to bread she learned thanks to dinner with Jay at the beginning of the week) with her own fork, she popped the piece of meat into her mouth. Then she shrugged.

“Nothing to tell,” she told him and when he gave her his own eye roll, Kim laughed, “I’m serious. We’re friends. Look, with Adam and Hailey together now and you and Rojas having a vibe. We didn’t want to be third wheels. So we just started hanging out with each other.”

“Mhmm and are you and your friend participating in some friendlier extracurriculars?” Kevin smirked. Kim felt her cheeks burn at the question. “No,”

And that was the truth. Besides that one night of comfort, that had resulted in a baby there was nothing between them like what Kevin was implying.

The next day at work, when she and Jay were on their way to interview a witness, she made an appointment with her doctor to see if they had anything that could help with her nausea. The nausea had been the most violent today. Though it helped to be in the vehicle with her baby daddy, who knew about her morning sickness and kept her window cracked and passed her a water bottle after water bottle, and kept the air conditioning pressed against her to help.

Thankfully, she made it through the day without throwing up, despite the smell that wafted around the office and never left. Did someone order a fish sandwich with pickles...and was that mustard? Or tabasco sauce?

At the end of the day, Kim waved to Platt as she started to walk out with Jay and Hailey when the desk sergeant called her back.

“What’s up?”

“Internet said it was an appropriate gift,” Platt said as she pulled a mug with the words: MOM COP with the CPD symbol painted on it in a pretty soft blue color.

Kim’s eyes widened when she saw it. They weren’t telling anyone yet. How did the desk sergeant of their district know? Kim reached for it quickly, hiding it under her jacket.

“How’d you know?” She asked.

“I’ve been a cop for a long time,” the older woman’s answer was soft, “Plus, I overheard you and Halstead talking the other day.”

“Am I crazy?” Kim asked.

“Maybe. But some of the best things in life start as crazy... So go with your gut Burgess.” Platt’s lips twitched upward, “And I’ll deny I ever said this if you tell him, but Halstead is one of the good ones.”

Then she patted Kim’s shoulder and walked away. Kim stared after Platt, the woman who had been and continued to be her mentor since she stepped foot in the 21st. Then she turned and made her way back up to the Intelligence bullpen. She had some news she needed to share with Voight.

“Sarge?” Kim knocked on the door frame of Voight’s office. Voight looked up surprised to see his officer there.

“Burgess? I thought you had gone home for the night.”

“I did, but I…” Kim broke off and sighed heavily. She knew that there was a chance that this would change things for her here in Intelligence. That she could even lose her spot up here, but that didn’t matter anymore because it wasn’t just here she had to think about anymore. “Can I talk to you about something? It’s important.” Hank waved a hand in her direction and Kim knew that was her queue to go ahead.

“I’m pregnant. About eight weeks along and I understand. I understand that my place here will possibly change in Intelligence. But I just...I had to tell you.” She hurried out in a rush. She didn’t know what she expected from her Sargent. A few questions maybe. Some paperwork needed to be filled out. But she wasn’t expecting Hank to get up, make the way around his desk, or for his arms to encircle her into an embrace.

“Kim, I’m so happy for you.” His voice was warm and it brought a smile to Kim’s lips. Only for it to drop a minute later when he brought up how excited Adam must be. Then it hit her. Sergeant Voight thought Adam was the father and if Voight thought so, everyone else would too.

“Sarge, no. It’s not Adam’s. He and Hailey are still together. It’s uh...Jay’s actually.”

Voight pulled back some to look at her. His gaze was sharp as he licked his lips.  He finally asked in a fairly soft voice, “Does he know?”

Kim nodded. “He does. He wanted to be here with me when I told you but he didn’t know I was going to tell you tonight….I didn’t know I was going to tell you until Platt gave me this gift.” She held up the coffee cup for her Sargent to see. It was a simple gift but it had reshifted and refocused Kim’s world.

She was going to be someone’s mother.

Hank nodded, that quiet look on his face he got when he was trying to retrace a criminal’s steps.

“Okay, we’ll talk about this more tomorrow. It’s late. Go home, Kim. Get some sleep,” he said finally. His tone of voice was clear. It was an order from a sergeant to his officer. She nodded, “Yes Sarge.”

“Burgess, Halstead. My office,” Everyone looked up at the sound of Voight’s voice, the next day looking confused. Everyone except the two people he was calling for. The unlikely duo made their way into the office as Hank shut the door behind him.

“I’m going to be brief, but the first thing I want to know is why you didn’t disclose your relationship when it got serious because I would think out of the two of you and your history with me, you would know that I like to have all the facts.”

“Sarge-” they both started to speak at the same time before they glanced at each other and Kim ended up finishing her thought first. She shook her head, “Sarge, it’s not like that for us.”

Nodding Jay agreed with her before he gestured to Kim’s stomach. “Yeah, it’s like Kim said. It’s not like that. They were just a surprise that came after a day of too many close calls and needing some comfort that we found in each other.”

Voight asked another question, but the officer couldn’t hear anything her sergeant or her partner said because that horrid smell from yesterday was back and it made her stomach roll violently.

“Burgess?” Hank asked concerned as he watched the woman wrap her arms around her stomach and put her head in between her knees. Jay turned, looking too, and had started to rub a hand up and down her back because he knew what was probably happening.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m good sarge. Just a little morning sickness nausea.” Kim finally managed to reassure him with a shaky thumbs up. But that wasn’t the wisest choice because as soon as the words came out of her mouth, her stomach gave another turbulent roll and she jumped up, giving in to the urge to run to the bathroom.

“Excuse me,” she thought she said the words, but she couldn’t be sure as she turned. The door was yanked open before Kim tore through the bullpen, ignoring the alarmed calls of her team.

Reaching the bathroom, she skidded to a stop on her knees in front of the porcelain bowl just before she coughed up the contents of her breakfast that morning. A second behind her, Jay dropped to his knees just at her back. He grabbed her hair pulling it back, so it wasn’t dangling in her face as he rubbed her back again.

“Okay?” Jay asked when he didn’t hear heaving anymore. Kim coughed and nodded, “I think so. For right now at least.”

So Jay stood and grabbed some paper towels as he ran them under the faucet and handed them to her. Then he waited while she wiped her face and pulled her to her feet.

“Still okay?” He asked. When she nodded, he continued, “I don’t think you heard him but Voight said he’s switching up partners again. He also asked if you wanted to be detailed to light duty early. I answered that for you. Hope you don’t mind.”

“As long as you said no,” Kim mumbled, her baby daddy nodded to her relief. “I said you didn’t want to be out until you absolutely had to be. He also said it’s up to us as to when we wanted to tell the team.”

“I’ll leave that up to you since I told Voight without you. If you don’t want to tell them today though, I hope you have a reason you followed me, besides you know, the truth.”

“We can tell them. Besides, they’ll want to know why you’re moving to light duty in two weeks.”

Kim blinked at him. There was no way…she was that close to moving to light duty. Though, looking down at her stomach, Kim knew it had to be true. Morning sickness didn’t start until she was at least eight weeks along, according to her book.

“Is it going to be that bad every time?”  Kim asked quietly as Jay continued to rub her back. He was still rubbing her back as they walked back to the bullpen. Kim shook her head as she told him quietly, “That was just as rough as when we figured out your child doesn’t like bread and I have to deal with that till the end of the second trimester? Can I go on a liquid diet then?”

“I don’t think that’ll help. You’ll still throw up. You just won’t taste everything you eat.” He laughed, just as quietly. Then his hand stopped its gentle movements on her back completely and she looked up to see the unit plus Voight staring at them.  

“Everything alright, Kim?” Kevin asked. Before she answered, the brunette glanced up at Jay, who nodded.

“Yeah, Kev. Just some slight morning sickness,” she told him sheepishly. Everyone glanced at each other. Then it was Hailey who asked, “Wait. Morning sickness? So that means you’re pregnant?”

“About eight weeks along,” Kim nodded with an unconscious hand lifting to her flat stomach.

“Hold up. Hold up. Is this why you ordered a burger without the bun on Saturday?” Kevin asked. Kim shrugged at her former partner, “They don’t like bread right now. I’m hoping they’ll get over it soon.”

“And how does Jay fit into this?” Adam asked from where he sat at his desk. Jay gave a slight smirk as he explained in a sarcastic tone, “Well Ruz, it kind of makes two people to make a baby.”

“Wait so you two…” Rojas trailed off as she dragged a finger between the two of them. Kim shrugged, “We’re not together but it was one night. The night after we closed the infection case.”

Rojas whistled, “Damn. Y'all weren’t kidding when you said this unit is close.”

Then there was a beat of silence while Hank stepped away to take a call. Another look was shared between the team. Then their unit was rushing forward. Hailey and Vanessa wrapped Kim in one hug while Kevin patted Jay on the back. Then her former partner wrapped her in a tight bear hug. It was only when Kevin had pulled away and the other two girls had Jay’s attention that Adam pulled her into a hug of his own.

“Congratulations,” he told her quietly, sincerely. Then he squeezed her again, “Are you happy?”

“It’s not quite how I planned on becoming a mother. But yeah, yeah I am.” She told the man, who in another life could’ve been the father of her children. Had she actually kept the ring, but Adam wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment and that was okay.

She wasn’t meant for Adam but maybe Hailey Upton would be the one for him instead.

“Good. That’s all I want for you Kim.” He let go of her, squeezing her hand. Then he moved to Jay, boasting loudly.

“Okay, we can continue the celebration later. Right now we have a case and given the circumstances, I’m reassigning partners. But temporarily? Atwater and Burgess, Rojas and Ruzek, and Upton and Halstead. I'll reassess later but right now we need to move.”

TAGGING: @maddyjb @sowrongitslottie @thewannabewriter @leeleeboo​ @chalstead86 

[incarnateirony]

I was in one of Jensen's virtual m&gs during the pandemic. No NDAs signed and nothing super sekrit spilled so I thought I'd share what he said.

One attendee said she struggled with Dean dying. Jensen said he was a Dean girl too ( love that man, lol). It took him a long time to make peace with Dean's ending because he felt Dean shouldn't have been the one to go down. But Jensen finally accepted that Dean would've wanted to go out swinging.

Considering how bitter he still is about the rebar, I'm not sure Jensen's as accepting as all that. But the dude's a team player and he knows how to work the PR game. And I guess it's better than hating the ending to your 15 year legacy.

But that's okay, I can hate all of it on Jensen's behalf. I think Dean's death was stupid and his heaven was fu*king depressing. Nobody showed up except Bobby to meet him. Dean himself acted like he got a lobotomy on the way up to the pearly gates. No reaction to seeing dead!Bobby, no questions about Cas or Jack or his parents or Charlie or the Roadhouse gang. Just drank a beer and went off driving by himself. Even Miracle didn't bother showing up (not that I blame the poor pup. Chasing ghost squirrels must have sounded a lot more fun than sitting in a car for 40 stinking years.)

So I gotta admit, I let out a silent cheer when Jensen also said Dean's death wasn't the end of his story, it was just another chapter. Even though the prequel hadn't yet been announced, now I know Jensen was already plotting. Bye bye OCC pod person Dean, hello story and characterization that actually make sense.

Yeah I was streaming Reflections in my meta run when the episode name dropped so that was a nice sniper bullet to the brain, thanks apollo

for what it's worth, in server, we're going to be restarting the whole alchemy path and tarot lessons, complete with some shiftabout videos to help visual learners. So make sure to pipe up, and check in for schedules. I gotta figure a good time of day.

[papa-evershed]

I just read your fic and it's ace! Love the Daniel fantasy of a kitchen fuck.

So, your before I read your fic, I'd actually just finished one of my own based on your idea of him needing a bit of self-release. I haven't really written anything like this before and I just did it in bits and pieces throughout the day on my phone, but I wanted to share it with you anyway because of the Daniel love.

It's set around episode two of the series and mentions some stuff from it. Cameo from The Coat, the cat, and a blep.

I don't have AO3 or anything, so feel free to share it with your followers on here. I don't have any that aren't bots because I'm a lurker 😂 And I hope you enjoy it as much as I did yours and all your content ❤️

...

It was another early finish to a disappointing Thursday at the restaurant. Daniel sighed and leaned back against the door of his flat, closing his eyes and pressing his fingers into the sockets, trying to alleviate some of the building tension in his head. He only opened them again when he felt Gordon winding his way between his legs, purring enthusiastically.

Daniel had adopted the ginger stray about a year ago when he found the cat mooching around behind the restaurant. After feeding him scraps and telling him his worries for a couple of months, he finally popped the cat in a box, had him checked over by a vet, and officially become his owner. As much as anyone can really own a cat. He had to admit, it was nice to come home to something other than an empty flat and a stack of overdue bills.

Shrugging out of his heavy coat, he followed the cat through to the kitchen. Sitting on the counter, next to a half drank bottle of red wine, was the bill of service for his father's funeral. The cremation they never planned that was interrupted with the news that his father's sudden death might be murder. He picked up the piece of paper and shut it in a drawer with other pieces of paper he couldn't quite face tonight. Gordon meowed loudly and jumped on the counter demanding attention. Daniel scratched the cat behind the ears before grabbing his bowl from the drying rack and a pouch of wet food from the cupboard. With a flourish he set the food down before Gordon, as though presenting a dish he'd cooked to a customer at his restaurant.

"And for sir, the cooked chicken with green beans." Gordon attacked the meal hungrily.

With a slight smile Daniel stood back and reached for the bottle of red. He picked it up before changing his mind and heading for the fridge. He wanted a hot shower to try and scrub away the day and his problems with it, and a bottle of beer was better suited for the job of shower drinking. He took a long draft of beer on the way to the bathroom, he wanted nothing more than to relax and forget for just a short while.

The bathroom light threw him into sharp relief. All angles and dark undereyes. Hair grey where it had been dark, lines where they hadn't been a few years ago. He felt weary, like all the fight had left him. The fight for the restaurant, the fight to settle his father's will, the fight against Glen - his shady creditor and sister's ex - and, the fight to find out who might have murdered his father. He flung on the shower and turned it to hot. Another long pull on the beer and Daniel kicked his trainers off. He dragged his jumper and t-shirt over his head together, then tossed them into the corner of the bathroom, before stepping out of his jeans, socks, and boxers and discarding them the same. Grapping the beer for another slug, he stepped into the steaming shower, and placed it on a high shelf out of the stream of water.

He closed his eyes and let the water run over his body. It was a moment of quiet relief amidst the chaos of his life. He ran his hands through his hair, which thankfully he hadn't lost yet unlike a lot of his mates, and then made quick work of washing the kitchen smell away with a coconut shampoo. He'd had a partner once who used the brand, and even though they'd moved on, the shampoo had stayed, like so many pieces of personalities acquired through relationships. The coconut and shea butter shower gel hadn't been a relationship hangover, that was all him. He liked the smell, a reminder of holidays to places with warm breezes and boozy nights. As he lathered the soap against his body his mind drifted - to how he used to be firmer in places he was turning soft, to how he used to shave his chest because "manscaping" was the thing, to how long it had been since someone else had touched him. Without realising it his hand settled between his legs, first meandering around washing away the day, then lingering, cupping at his balls, and running up and down his length until it began to stiffen.

His mind continued to wander, this time to how easy it had all been when he was younger, all the wait staff that came and went from the various restaurants he'd worked at, easy fun for a night or two. But that was before he was the boss, the owner, before the responsibilities. Even then he'd found some fun, getting his cock sucked by his ex after a successful opening night, pushed back against the walk in fridge, moaning in pleasure after all the customers had gone. No matter what though, it always came back to the restaurant, the debt, Glen, his father, his sisters...

He leaned his forehead against the cool tile letting the water cascade down his back. He tried to forget it all. Everything. Nothing. He focused on his cock. His hand. The rising pleasure and the short relief it would bring. Gripping his balls tightly he stroked at the sensitive skin leading to his arse. He liked having it licked, teased at, having a tongue work all its way back between his buttocks and then forwards again all the way to his tip. His hand found its way back to his cock, pulling the foreskin back from the head he rolled his thumb over the head. With an increasing grip to match his growing erection, he began to work his hand up and down. He made long, slow strokes from root to tip, rolling his palm over the head. He didn't want to take his time over this because he knew his mind would inevitably wander back to the million things outside the shower, but he allowed this moment to linger, feeling himself grow thick and heavy and his palm, the bead of pre-cum forming and being washed away by spray from the shower.

Daniel groaned as he quickened his pace. He watched his hand swiftly moving up and down, intent and focused. He pressed his other palm against the wall, breathing through his mouth as he continued to chase this moment of release. His tongue wet his lips. His cock strained in his palm, inching towards the finish. He furrowed his brow and moved to quick, short strokes towards the head with his thumb and forefingers. As his breathing became shallower he felt the pleasure building inside of him, a wave heading towards the shore. He knew from within it was ready to break. He came with a silent grunt, an open mouth, a look of pleasure and release, and a warm spilling from his cock.

Daniel lay his forehead back against the tile next to his hand. He took long, deep breaths and closed his eyes. As his breathing was returning to normal he stepped back, washing the remaining cum from himself. He scrubbed his hand up his body, mussing the dark hair that spread from his chest to his crotch. He felt better in that instant, but it wasn't to last. As he drained the remains of his beer and turned off the shower other thoughts began to creep back in. The 25k he owed, the father he hadn't really known, a life amounting to nothing much at all.

He grabbed a towel from the rail and ran it over his body. He was tired, but his mind was racing again, the moment of relief already gone. Pacing to the bedroom he pulled on a pair of pyjama bottoms and a t-shirt before heading back to the sparsely decorated living room. Gordon was already sitting on the sofa giving himself a post-dinner bath, and Daniel sunk down next to him. He half-heartedly turned on the TV and began scrolling through the listings before settling on a rerun of a baking show he wouldn't really watch. As he let his tired body melt into the sofa he realised what he really needed was a drink.

He turned to Gordon, "Get us a beer, mate". The cat blinked and in reply, began to lick its crotch.

Ahhh! Thank you for the kind words and I enjoyed yours too! It was steamy but I also enjoyed the bits about his kitty. 😸 An excellent steamy combination of fanon and canon, well done. 🤓

Also, I know you said you didn't have an A03 account but definitely consider it. We need more stories under The Inheritance tag and this one is already written and ready to go. 👀 No pressure though!

[self-loathing-angel-of-thursday2]

Beautiful Spouse’s Rewatch Thoughts SPN 07x11 Adventures in Babysitting

Today is our 10 year wedding anniversary so we’re watching Supernatural lol

“Is this a short season? They’re going hard on the music” “I don’t know how I feel about Bobby being dead” “This dude has quite the face” “They did a great job with the sound design of the show” “One of her eyes is crooked. I wonder why” “If Bobby wasn’t dead yet, he is now, because the music tells me so” “Two weeks PBS - Post Bobby Singer” “To be fair, that would drive me nuts. If someone woke up in the hospital, wrote those numbers down, I’d go bonkers. Spend years trying to figure it out” “Why was there a noise if Dean drank the beer without noticing?” “How…what the fuck. That’s the creepiest thing” “What the fuck” “Is he just trying to get her out of the room or what?” “Bingo” “He’s going to leave her alone too. Jesus Christ” “Might want to leave a number that she can call if you die, too; otherwise, she’s fucked” 🎶ketchup and mustard🎶

“If he was going to shoot you, he would have already, Dean” “perty gun” “I’m with Dean on this one” “You cut your palm???? Why would you do that. Idiot” “Especially right there. That moves all the time”

“Talk about beige and tan” “What’s Buster Brown?” “Gotta love how Frank called Dean Buster Brown, and the first thing on wikipedia is a boy in a pink suit” “It could be a lot of different places with those coordinates. You don’t know longitude and latitude. I guess you could narrow it down to who owns the land like they just did” “This fkn lighting is immaculate” “That’s horrific?” “Is it the silver or the twist that kills them? Is the twist necessary?” “Well that’s not good” “That’s how you got caught I guess” “He slept in a chair for 36 hours?” “I feel like they forced the Sarah Palin joke” “Why does this guy have so many extension cords? I don’t understand” “So Sam gqve the girl Dean’s number. So he did do the right thing” “Twice? Oh.” “Straight to the closet” “How many guns has Dean had pointed at him this episode? Two?” “Don’t bother filling in the rest of the story” “I don’t understand” “He enjoyed that way too much” “She could have made a good addition to the show” “She’s like a miniature Ruby, ya know? Like a kid version of Ruby. She’s got the same vocal delivery” “Wasn’t expecting that” “Dean just stood there the whole time. What the fuck” “They were driving around silent until now. And whatever time at night it is and it’s “good for them” Jesus Christ” “Just kick him in the dick”

[cocotome]

Hirarin, Koniyan and Tori-chan record for Dangerous Reunion! This was such a fun episode!! They drank champagne and beer during the broadcast (I was lowkey waiting to hear Hirarin drunk XD) and had a lot of fun! I didn’t realize Tori-chan was in the studio tho. During the broadcast he sounded like he was calling in by phone lol!

[what-gs-watching]

“I’m 903 years old, and I’m the man who’s gonna save your lives.”

Well. My fridge has decided to completely die, which is really fun, and I’m fighting with Lowe’s to get it delivered tomorrow even though I know that’s absolutely not going to happen, and I had a phone screen with a recruiter for a company I’m dying to work for and I’m anxious as hell about a bunch of things suddenly, and that’s annoying as hell.

SO I’m still hunkering down in content because that’s just what ya do. Even though the dangerously low simmer my brain has been on has been causing problems in my life, I’m not ready to give in and boot up just yet. 

But what I AM doing is getting EXTREMELY excited about the Doctor Who 60th anniversary episodes, so we’re gonna dive into it. Because we have to. 

Doctor Who is a thing for me. Doctor Who is sitting in a stingy apartment outside of Boston with my roommate (who I had a major crush on, and eventually became my husband, which is definitely its own story) and watching episodes on a shitty laptop while we drank beers late into the night. I remember losing my mind when we found out who the Face of Boe was, my heart breaking during Rose’s goodbye. 

My husband had seen it all at that point, he brought me into it and he enjoyed watching me watch it more than watching it himself. I asked a million questions, constantly,  and he refused to tell me anything. At one point my inner monologue became extremely British and I had to resist shouting “OI!” at him when he was being a jerk. Doctor Who wove its way into our extremely weird love story; I fell for the Doctor while falling for him. 

So it’s really no surprise how obsessed over David Tenannt’s 10th Doctor I was. I mean, he was the first boyfriend Doctor, right? You could argue 9 was, but in this house, we don’t really talk about 9. You get through 9 and then you get to amazing, perfect, wonderful 10 and it’s all over. 

Also yes I’m very aware that I’ve said Matt Smith’s 11  is my number one Doctor and he absolutely is, but this is about 10. Because you have to separate them. The show is as good as it is because each of them are unique, while keeping that pulse of doctor underneath. And David does it so beautifully. 

 Like everybody probably, I did really love the Rose/Doctor relationship on the first watch. Boyfriend Doctor is supposed to have that little romantic string, right? And he was so sweet with her - burning out a sun to say goodbye. That got me. The moment he tells her she could spend the rest of her life with him, but he couldn’t do the same. 

Maybe for me the appeal of the Doctor though is the loneliness of it, and  it drips from 10. He’s fully inside of his feelings about being the last of the Time Lords, and he’s always so sorry when things go wrong. He wants to be with humans, he wants to experience things with them but he feels guilty about it because he knows that it never, ever works out. He’s excited and resigned at the same time. I felt a lot of that. He was sad and he was beautiful. And everyone kept fawning over him.

Except, for Donna Noble. She is my favorite 10 companion by far. She takes no shit from that man and the bond they end up with is so pure. I love the fact that she tells him no the first time he invites her to travel with him; that mofo had just murdered a bunch of crazy spider babies, dripping wet and radiating fury, and she was. not. having. it. And she was right about that. He had to get through the Martha Jones mess and realize he’s just fucking about with these poor girls before he could deal with the absolute powerhouse that is Donna-effing-Noble.

Makes him help free a slave society from servitude? Check. Forces him to save at least someone from Pompeii even though it’s a fixed point in time? Yeap. Becomes half time-lord and saves his ass? Obviously. They complemented the hell out of each other; she made him better and he did the same. 

Honestly, if I could be any one of them, I’d be Donna. I’m a pain in the ass, too. Sometimes it’s fucking needed. Brilliant people, amazing, shining sparkling people need to be balanced out too. 

Her ending is by far the saddest one in 10’s adventures. He has to wipe her memories of him so her mind isn’t swallowed up by time lord power, and it’s devastating. She’d come into herself with him, and he had to sacrifice all of that to let her live. Back to her basic life. Back to that horrible grind of absolutely everything. She was gonna travel with him for the rest of her life. 

Which is why I’m SO excited to see how they bring the two of them back. If any companion deserves it, it’s Donna. Rose is set with her cloned human doctor, Martha is knocking about doing this and that with Mickey? Right? But poor Donna, trapped in that very human, very boring, very static life. But she’s gonna come back, and she’s going to put him in his place again, and it’s going to be brilliant. 

Did I cry a little bit (a solid bit) when I saw the first full trailer? 100% yes. Donna Noble is very much another one of my spirit animals. 

And David Tennant has taken up permanent residence in my brain. After Good Omens season 2 I obviously had to watch all of 10’s story again and now it’s all mashed up in Crowley (and the infinite Crowley’s I’ve devoured through a sheer metric ton of fanfic) and I kind of love that. That man is chameleon and fully inhabits every role he plays but seeing 10 after the Crowley of it all, it makes more sense somehow. 

I clearly want to believe there’s a universe out there where they exist together. 

I also am going to believe that this whole 60th anniversary thing came around just for me. Because what I need right now is more of 10, running and saving and running again, lonely and sorry and excited and beautiful, and older but not, and different but not. 

My love for 10 is wrapped in my love for a lot of things that happened in my life and I wouldn’t be having an existential crisis without him coming back to me, so maybe I can love some of the things that are happening in my life right now. He’s going to be 10 and 14 at the same time, and maybe that means I can be a few things at once, again. Instead of whatever it is that I am, now. Maybe I can bring those things together again. 

It’s good that 11 is a singular thing, a completed something. Because 11 for me is someone else, as much as it pains me. Which is something I’ll get to. But I need 10 to keep going, and I really can’t wait to see it. It’s going to fuck with me in all of those uncomfortable, perfect ways. 

It’s gonna be good, it’s gonna be glorious.  So: Allons-y.