#he looks like a fucking anime villain with plans for world domination

[decadennce]

I want to crack his skull open with a sledgehammer

[egg-emperor]

I really like getting any look at how Eggman treats poor little critters of any kind. I wish they'd show more in depth, beyond just seeing that they're captured and used in robots/for energy/etc, such as his behavior and how he treats them too. In Sonic 1, the animals in robots and capsules were the first look at his evil on screen that established that he's a villain there after all, so it's pretty important.

I personally really wanna see more of his cruelty when he's messing around and toying with them. I really like how they did it in IDW when he was testing the metal virus.

He's cruel, threatening, condescending, and short-tempered when forcing them into doing as he says. But he also has a wide sadistic grin on his face and casts a delightfully sinister shadow while towering over them as he watches their fear and struggle as they succumb to their cruel enslavement and become what he wants them to be. He takes great pride in the success and revels in their suffering for his selfish benefit in his evil plans.

I also love how he visibly enjoys it way more than Starline, who treats it more like a serious task and procedure, while Eggman knows how to have fun with it! He's the evilest and most fucked up 💕

And I love how he lowers a Pocky down with a fishing rod to attack a poor Ricky and is just so silly about it. How does he manage to be so cute while doing something so messed up? XD

Rise of Wisps has that similar energy that I had always wished to see in Colors, so it was a real great treat to finally get it a decade later:

I love his dark mischievous grin after he grabs and almost squeezes the eye of the white Wisp, how he slams them into the machine then throws himself against the glass to scare them, then leans in for a good look at their energy being zapped for his benefit and erupts into laughter. He didn't even need to be so physically violent and harsh to get what he wanted out of them in this case, it's even clearer that he did it just because he wanted to and enjoyed it.

These are good examples of the perfect balance I say I like to see in Eggman, where he'll be dark, threatening, and serious in his evil, yet also find enjoyment in it and being sadistically playful and giddy in it too. Anything of the sort where he's doing something messed up but finding twisted joy and entertainment in it is something I always love to see, if you haven't figured that out already hehe

Just look at this asshole having a great time being terrible and tormenting and toying with his prey 🥰💜💕

You can really see how much he enjoys not only using them as his tools in accomplishing his goals but also striking fear into them, forcing them into submission, and having total power over them when they're weak and helpless against him. He finds it really entertaining and amusing and has a blast!

I can imagine that he enjoys controlling and tormenting little defenseless creatures because it gives him a taste of how he wants the whole world and everything in it to be as small and inferior compared to him and be overpowered, owned, controlled and used by him like this. They're a good start because they're vulnerable and easy targets. He probably likes how they can't talk or fight back and he's so much bigger, stronger, and smarter than them.

It's very satisfying and entertaining to him but he's so power hungry that he desires to move on to bigger targets. In the games, we know him to keep climbing up by starting with the little creatures, then Sonic and co, then other humans in his attempts to accomplish his biggest goal of all- total world domination where he'll force everyone else to become his slaves and obey and serve in the same way and they'll have no choice but to submit to the rule of the empire.

It's no secret that he's always been cruel even to poor innocent an defenseless creatures but it's interesting to get more insight to how he goes about treating them when they're in his clutches. Especially with how it's a good example of his sadism as he clearly loves the power and control he can have over them, finds it entertaining and will go out of his way to treat them especially cruelly, even when it isn't necessary to accomplish his goal. Love this nasty bastard 💘

[growling]

Okay

Bungou Stray Dogs. My beloved, my beloathed and my ex who keeps walking back into my life for a makeout session after I swore I was done with it for the 11th time.

It is- not a good story, structure wise at least. I get raising stakes but also we started s1 with "we're frenemies with our local gang and we occasionally homoeroticly fight eachother" to *gestures vaguely at s5*

And that doesn't bother me too much tbh because I love media that cares about its audience and keeping things silly but also *ducks nuke*

The mangaka keeps having to write reasons for Chuuya to not show up and murder everypony, that's silly

Fyodor has a funny accent and a silly goofy hat and a greasy hairstyle and I guess he sometimes is smart. I guess.

Justice for my boy Karma who showed up in one episode and then Fyodor killed him for some reason, RIP my boy

Idk man I have lots of thoughts

the stakes one is so real because like. they did get higher after season 1 with the whole moby dick crashing event, but like it made sense it was fine also i liked that season. and then we got introduced to demon fyodor who apparently was even worse both described at the s2 finale and in the dead apple movie, so like, dude got hyped up massively. and then he got s3 to himself but actually its not over yet, it was actually a setup for s4-s5 and. I am asking. since fukuchi is over. and they seem to be making fyodor out to be even more threatening (every single villain is more threatening than the last. you know.) than fukuchi, the goddamn man with time travel sword, reality-altering page, vampire goons, trying to (virtually. his motives as well as execution of them are.... Peculiar to me) achieve mind control world domination....... like how do they plan to go worse than that. the problem with trying to have every single villain be more powerful than the last is that one day you just gonna run out of ideas and just write a literal undefeatable god. which is fukuchi and also fyodor but i am legitimately terrified of what they're gonna do with him in the later chapters. i am all caught up and....... its looking very exhausting already

as well as how like, in the earlier seasons we got these episodes that are just purely character driven with way lower stakes that just exist there to establish the cast, and they just. slowly stopped doing that. right now, from like season 4 up to where we are currently there has been literally ZERO breathing room for the plot, every single scene is just stressful high tension main plot main plot main plot fighting the HD/DOA and it actually made me too tense as i was watching like jesus fuck slow down. which is why i cheer and clap so much whenever i see poe also being there sometimes. thank you for your service king. as well as all the other more minor characters that appeared and nikolai getting to jest with people, as well as the Bram & Aya Adventures, regardless on whether it is "important" to the plot . and also sigma's whole introduction in the manga that just established him as an actually really nice guy that the anime just cut out to make room For The Current Main Plot auurrrrhghgh. shut up about fukuchi show me kyouka. hey where the fuck was kyouka for most of this even

like. if they just released chuuya upon all their enemies it would be over. isnt he like, the actual incarnation of arahabaki you know the. literal god. just make them use corruption after you make sure dazai can stop them from eating shit and fucking dying, deploy her at the entire hunting dogs squad and its all over. like..... chuuya could just fix everything that is going on and the writers know it so they keep making up reasons (and sometimes they don't even do that, and just ignore it) as to why actually she's not available currently. you wrote this guy to be the single most powerful genderfuck in the universe please use him . chuuya i am so fucking sorry i could treat you so much better babygirl

fyodor sure is. A Character. that exists. and like, i like him, but also... i realized i'm only ever entertained by him whenever he's being silly, like with the whole mersault ball fyozai two man comedy show, or with his interactions with nikolai (who is one of the lights in the darkness of the current arc.... please keep being entertaining king). but like, i feel like the writer(s) drove themselves into a corner by making him so inhumanly intelligent, same with dazai. like. each of the serious interactions between him and dazai (the only nda member he's allowed to talk with apparently) just feel like two kids roleplaying "i slash u in the chest with my flaming sword and u are die!!!" "but before that I DODGED and hit u with my laser beam!!" "no but I moved out the way at last second and bring out the BOMBS and then i throw them at u and u explode and are dead for real!!!!" "no but then i miraculously survive steal ur flaming sword and set u on fire and u burn and die!!!" "but before i could die i put out the fire with my water bucket and then shoot u 100000 times and-" like. it was funny the first few times it happened but.... I get it. you have high IQ. I don't like this party I wanna leave chuuya can you please pick me up

karma got fucking massacred and for what. society if fyodor instead recruited him into the DOA and sigma got to have a single normal friend and they bonded over their mutual perpetual anguish. they really just introduced a really interesting guy just to kill him off in the same episode. but they. kept fukuchi i guess

[chalkrevelations]

HOW WE FEELING VEGASPETE NATION? Because I don’t know about the rest of y’all, but I personally am feeling like I’ve done AN ENTIRE FUCKING KILO of that cocaine from the warehouse in Ep 7.

So, LISTEN. I can kind of see now why they’ve been so stingy about doling out VP material, because if they did, it would have immediately eclipsed the actual Kinn and Porsche material. If this is the electricity Build and Bible generate on-screen (no pun intended) when Vegas and Pete are at loggerheads, I cannot even imagine what their sex scene is going to be like. I am going to need some supplemental oxygen.

Although, let’s be honest. Pete dominated this scene. Build owns it. I don’t know if Bible consciously stepped back or if Build is actually just this fucking magnetic when they let him off the leash, but I literally couldn’t take my eyes off of him. I kept forgetting to look at Bible – at Bible – because I couldn’t look away from Build and his perfect beautiful feral face. His smile when Vegas accuses Pete of foiling his plan, Pete’s so pleased with himself for outsmarting Vegas. The way he leans forward into what’s happening. And the sheer fucking determination that sets in at 40:00, when Vegas starts sparking his jumper cables at him, the way the smile falls away, but it’s not replaced by fear, OH NO. Wait, let me go dig out a thing I posted during my breakdown of the “consume you” trailer, what was it, oh yeah, when Vegas gets his hand around Pete’s throat: “You think you’ve got the upper hand? Are you sure? Am I reacting like you thought I would? Did you want to see fear? Tough shit, you’re not getting that from me.” AND HERE WE ARE. NO TURNING BACK.

And then Pete’s utter refusal to look away, the way he stares down Vegas from 40:25 to 40:30, I just. I CAN’T. I CANNOT, Y’ALL. I’m fucking feral over this shot, and this is what I’ve been saying since the beginning, for weeks now, and it’s finally happening – you’re gonna lose this one, Vegas, you’re going to lose so completely and utterly and thoroughly, he’s going to get inside your head and inside your skin, and he’s going to crack you open and tear you apart, and then he’s going to stitch you back together, and he’s going to do it all so so so unexpectedly, with his unflinching gaze and his vulnerable wrists and that shroud of grey that he’s got wrapped around him, no villains and no heroes, and it’s going to be the best thing that’s ever happened to you in your miserable life, your entire world is going to be re-made, you’re going to be re-born when you lose this confrontation, the way you’re already losing in this scene, the way he’s dominating what’s going on, naked, defenseless, tied to a post and staring down your paltry little power play.

And Vegas. Oh my god, my dude. You are so angry that it’s making you stupid. It’s like you’ve never met Pete. It’s like he’s never ridden shotgun for you on an op. It’s like he’s never stared you down while you tortured a guy. You’re looking at him, and all you’re seeing is that guy who you freaked out by leaning against his car roof like a working girl offering a BJ, and you’re completely forgetting that Pete is perfectly comfortable with violence. He’d be 100x more freaked out if you tried to kiss him right now, but this? This is the reality he swims in. This is where he fucking shines. Which they’ve actually made literal, because can I also mention how beautifully they filmed this precise shot? The lighting in this scene, the LIGHTING. I don’t have the technical knowledge to know exactly what they’re doing, but they’ve managed the same effect during this staredown that they did with Porsche at the window of Tawan’s room in Ep 9, where it doesn’t even look real, it looks like an anime.

I’m dying, I’m dead, they’ve killed me.

[riotwritesthings]

song and dance number not included

WinterIron, T, 1.9k, crack, this is just crack, banter, vague nonpowered AU | A03

Once upon a time @gayspacesprinkles made this post. And fun fact about me I will write basically anything Ant says ahaha ILUBRO.

I know this has already been done better don’t fight me I just wanna make everything crack

Title: song and dance number not included Collaborator Name: Riot @buckybarnesbingo Square Filled: U4, One Night Stand @starkbucksbingo Square Filled: N1, World Domination Ship/Main Pairing: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags & Triggers: Crack, banter Summary: Bucky has seen some wild things in his time as a Professional Cuddle Buddy. Nothing beats finding himself in Tony Stark’s penthouse with the sleep deprived genius himself. Word Count: 1,897

-

Bucky steps off the elevator, into the giant penthouse, and he is 90% sure that this is some kind of elaborate prank. Ten minutes from now someone is going to be shoving a waiver in his face and demanding to broadcast his embarrassing surprised face on national TV.

Because no way does someone like Tony Stark need to hire a cuddling agency.

He takes another couple steps, and there’s no cameras. There’s nothing, just a giant empty penthouse, and Bucky glances down at his phone to confirm that yep, he is in the right place.

He’s just about to turn and leave when a face pops up over the back of the couch.

The first thing Bucky notices is the big doe eyes, warm brown and huge like a Disney character, but so sad. The second thing he notices are the bags under the eyes, deep and dark like bruises, like they’ve been there for a while.

The fact that he’s just staring dumbly at Tony Stark is actually the fifth thing Bucky notices, after the insane lower lashes and the fluffy hair.

Luckily the man is apparently as sleep deprived as he looks, because he just blinks at Bucky for a couple seconds and by the time he speaks Bucky has mostly gotten his brain back online.

“Please tell me you’re really not a hooker,” Tony says, squinting at him, voice rough and a little whiny as he adds “I literally just want a hug.”

Bucky sputters out a laugh, rocking on his heels as he says “I solemnly swear I am not a prostitute. Though I do give great hugs.”

“Awesome,” Tony says with a happy sigh and flails his arms up over the couch, making grabby hands at him.

“Did you wanna move somewhere more comfortable?” Bucky asks, rounding the modernist monstrosity of furniture that is the couch. When Tony opens his mouth, suspicious look on his face, Bucky rolls his eyes and says “Still not a prostitute.”

Tony snaps his mouth shut again with a sheepish look, then huffs out a soft laugh.

“This is fine,” he says, sitting up fully and patting the spot between himself and the arm of the couch, “It’s just me here, I end up falling asleep out here half the time anyways.”

Which is... kind of a sad thought, actually. This penthouse seems huge, too big for one person, and based on the dark circles under Tony’s eyes he doesn’t get much sleep anywhere.

Bucky has barely dropped onto the couch before Tony is plastering himself to Bucky’s side, surprisingly strong arms looping around his waist and his face pressing into Bucky’s shoulder.

“Okay, start the clock,” Tony says, already going limp against his side.

“Hold on,” Bucky says with a laugh, twisting to the side slightly so he can lean back into the corner of the couch and get his arms around Tony in return, pulling him in a little closer and nearly fumbling his phone in the process. “Is that comfortable, um, Mr- Ow.”

“Just Tony,” Tony says, peeking up at him sourly and removing his impressively pointy finger from Bucky’s side, “unless you want to be ‘Mr Cuddle-Buddy’, that is.”

“I’ve been called worse,” Bucky says with another laugh, guiding Tony’s head back down to his chest. “I’m Bucky, though, for the record,” he adds.

“What are you, a Disney character?” Tony asks, voice muffled as he nuzzles into the curve of Bucky’s shoulder and then quickly blurts out “please play with my hair.”

Bucky doesn’t need to be asked twice, burying the fingers of his free hand in Tony’s messy curls, soft and wild like Tony has been running his own hands through it.

“Mm, perfect,” Tony sighs as he pulls his legs up onto the couch, curls himself into a neat little ball against Bucky’s side.

Bucky lifts his phone just enough to see the screen and punches the shortcut to set an alarm for three hours. “Okay, now you’re on the clock," he says, and then wedges his phone into the couch near his head where the armrest meets the back.

“You are already getting marked highly recommended,” Tony slurs out, and Bucky laughs softly. “Seriously, you are like 90% muscle how are you this soft.”

“It’s my specialty,” Bucky says dryly and Tony’s answering laugh shakes his whole body.

“Shh, I’m mentally composing my review,” Tony says, patting lazily at his chest.

“Out loud,” Bucky can’t help pointing out.

“Yes,” Tony says, lifting his hand again to wave it slightly as he talks, “Now where was I- Ah yes, guaranteed ‘not’ a prostitute-”

“-I could hear those air quotes-”

“Very warm,” Tony continues, completely ignoring his interruption except for the way his hand flails a little harder, “Possibly a Disney character."

“Pretty sure I’m not, someone woulda told me by now,” Bucky argues, grinning helplessly and pressing his fingers a little harder into Tony’s scalp.

“Oh, you definitely are,” Tony says with a happy sigh, rubbing his nose against Bucky’s chest, “The only question is, with a name like that, you’re either an adorable animal sidekick, or a villain. Possibly both.”

“What-“ Bucky objects around a sputtering laugh, “I don’t think there was actually a question there.”

Tony tilts his chin up just enough to give Bucky a sleepy glare as he says “Well, which one is it, is the question! You planning world domination?”

“Yes. My plan begins with cuddling you into submission.”

“Well it's working,” Tony says happily, and his expression really does look lighter than it had when Bucky first got here, even if he does still look exhausted. “But when is the song and dance number?”

“Later,” Bucky says with a snort, “It’s my dramatic exit.”

“Or you gotta pay extra, right? In the back room?” Tony asks with a grin and a lazy wink that’s really more of a slow, uncoordinated blink.

“Not a stripper either,” Bucky huffs with a roll of his eyes, resisting the urge to tug at Tony’s hair.

“Too bad,” Tony says with a dreamy sigh, and Bucky really does pull at Tony’s hair a little in admonishment even as he laughs.

Tony continues his rambling ‘review’ amid Bucky’s protests until his warm, teasing voice slowly tapers away, and an hour in he’s fast asleep, snoring quietly into Bucky’s chest.

Bucky is torn.

On the one hand, Tony probably wants to be awake for the time he’s paying for. On the other, he looks so tired.

Waking him up would probably be a crime, and despite Tony’s claims Bucky is not actually a Disney villain.

So he wiggles down a little more against the arm of the couch, slow and careful even though he figures that if Tony does wake up, he has two more hours to fall back asleep if that’s what he wants.

Bucky certainly wouldn’t mind, Tony is warm and pleasantly heavy against his side, draped over his chest, and he looks so much younger when his face is softened with sleep.

He looks so different in real life, so much more real than he looks on TV. So much smaller, curled up into a tiny ball on his giant couch, in his big empty penthouse.

Tony’s hair is a mess of fluffy curls, so soft as Bucky continues running his fingers through it, the muscles of his back strong under Bucky’s other palm.

When Bucky’s alarm goes off it’s startlingly loud in the quiet of the penthouse, and even though Bucky has to fumble with it a bit before he turns it off Tony doesn't do anything more than make a quiet, sleepy sound and wiggle in a little closer.

Bucky hesitates for a second, glancing down at Tony’s peaceful face, and then wedges his phone back into the couch.

He was going to make this his last appointment of the night anyways. He’ll just stay until Tony wakes up.

Bucky wakes up staring at the incredibly high ceiling of Tony Stark’s penthouse, bathed in early morning light.

“Ah, fuck,” Bucky groans quietly to himself.

“Yeah, I actually get that a lot,” comes the voice from somewhere around his sternum, and when Bucky tips his chin down it’s to find Tony with his chin propped against Bucky’s chest, giving him a thoughtful look.

He looks a little less tired, bags beneath his eyes a little less pronounced, gorgeous even with crease marks on his cheek from Bucky’s shirt. Even if there is something wary in his expression.

“Hi,” Bucky says stupidly, still trying to blink away the grogginess in his brain and wincing when his neck aches sharply. That’s what he gets for accidentally spending all night with his head tipped way back against the arm of the couch.

“Hi,” Tony says back, and his big Bambi eyes dart to the side for just a second before he says “I’m not wholly unfamiliar with the one night stand, but I must admit we usually make it further than the couch. Fully dressed. What-“

“If you accuse me of bein’ a hooker again, ‘m gonna roll you right off this couch,” Bucky says before he can wake up enough to stop himself, and while he’s busy mentally cringing Tony’s eyes go wide with recognition.

“Ah fuck,” Tony groans while his cheeks flush an appealing, distracting pink, “What’s the overtime charge look like for top rated pro cuddlers?”

“Nah, don’ worry about it,” Bucky says quickly, finally untangling his fingers from Tony’s hair so he can rub over his eyes, “sorry, should’a woken you up-“

“So you’re saying you’re off the clock?” Tony interrupts, one eyebrow raised in an incredulous look, “You stayed off the clock?”

“I’m- um,” Bucky sputters awkwardly, and then realizes he has no excuse and sheepishly finishes with “Yes?”

“Even after I’m pretty sure I called you a prostitute at least three times?” Tony asks, and he still looks mildly baffled but there’s a smile growing on his face.

“It was five,” Bucky corrects, smiling back helplessly, “Once by callin’ me a lady of the evening, which, incorrect on multiple counts.”

“Right, I remember now,” Tony says slowly, and there is a devious look in his eye as he adds “We decided you’re an animated cow.”

“It was a horse, an’ I think you know it,” Bucky says with a mock-glare, gently pinching Tony’s ear and then tightening his arm around Tony’s back when he unexpectedly bursts into wild giggles.

When Tony settles down again he digs his chin into Bucky’s sternum with a happy sigh. His expression goes thoughtful, chewing on his bottom lip, and Bucky tries really hard not to get distracted.

They’re so close that Bucky can just barely feel the way Tony’s breath shakes nervously on the inhale, and then he asks “So, what are your feelings on breakfast?”

“Important,” Bucky blurts quickly, heart jumping in his chest, “Very important. Especially if I’m going to accomplish world domination today.”

“I knew it!” Tony crows victoriously, pushing himself upright and elbowing Bucky in the gut in the process. He grins happily in response to Bucky’s pained grunt and climbs to his feet, grabbing Bucky’s hand and giving it a tug. “C’mon,” he whines when Bucky moves not at all, “we need to go raid my kitchen. I want to get on your good side before you take over the world, I’m hoping it’ll get me a good spot in the dance number.”

“Yeah, I think that can be arranged,” Bucky says, grinning wide as he lets himself be pulled to his feet.

[dalekofchaos]

Why Voldemort is a terrible villain and how I’d improve Voldemort as a villain

As much as I like Voldemort, when you look back on the books. Voldemort is a terrible villain. Yes he has the Horcruxes and has loyal followers...but that’s it. In this post I will be examining why Voldemort is a terrible villain in Harry Potter and how I would improve Voldemort as a villain.

Let’s look at Voldemort’s track record

No clear motivations. The movies do absolutely nothing to flesh out Voldemort, but that's understandable, they're the movies. But even in the books, there is no clear reason for Voldemort doing any of the things that he does. During the flashbacks in the Pensive, Tom is a disturbed child who has a tendency to torture animals, lure other children to creepy caves and steal stuff - all of this is bad, yes, but why? Why is Tom Riddle "evil"? I know the explanation that the canon somewhat provides: that Voldemort doesn't know love/friendship/connection because he was conceived under the trickery of a love potion, and his mother was abused But, even if you accept that explanation, that does not justify Tom Riddle being innately evil and monstrous. Why is he racist/supremacist? If he really is a natural genius with a detachment from human emotion, shouldn't he also be detached from things like blood supremacy, ancestry and mortality? Just because he's a sociopath doesn't mean he will automatically turn into Hitler.

Wages a Wizarding war, but couldn’t even conquer his own Wizarding Nation

He couldn’t become Minister Of Magic. Instead he dicked around in Borgins And Burkes and instead wanted to become Defense Against The Dark Arts Professor.....for reasons. He could’ve used his power as Minister Of Magic to gain followers, especially the fanatic pure blood families and the impressionable Slytherins and cover for his Horcrux murders. But nooo.

When Voldemort DOES take power by force during the second Wizarding War, he does barely anything with it. Voldemort owns the government and has an army of evil. Where does he plan to launch his attack on the world? At a god damn highschool. Yes I know he attacked Hogwarts because of the last Horcrux. Didn't need to get that far if he didn't act like the world's worst Bond villain and monologued for enough time to let Harry either escape or for the Deus ex machina to arrive on que. The first two times it happens, yeah I get it. You're a villain who is up himself, shit happens. But by book 5 when he is still doing dumb shit it's unforgivable. How hard is it to issue a kill on sight order to your hordes of evil? I mean FFS you have legit werewolves on your side, who can sniff out a drop of blood miles away and yet you do nothing with them? Not only do you fail to kill a defenseless baby but you can't evil kill the kid when he's locked up in your second in commands basement.

He isn't particularly charismatic or a decent leader. He does have tons of followers, for reasons. Seriously, except for fear and opportunism I can't understand why anybody would want to fight for him. I mean, I get that he is basically magic!Hitler, but actual Hitler could at least hold speeches. Actual Hitler had arguments why his rule would be good for the German people. Voldemort doesn't. Voldemort treats his followers like shit and tortures or kills them if they aren't useful any more.

He didn't do his homework and doesn't knows the magic lore good enough. He manages to kill himself two times because of lore he really should have known about. The first time he fails to see the magic love-charm, the second time he doesn't recognizes the arcane rules of wand ownership. Those are stupid, avoidable mistakes for somebody that is supposed to be the greatest dark mage of his time.

He isn't even a particularly good mage. He manages to get statemaled by Harry and defeated by Dumbledore. He never does anything truly remarkable with magic that we haven't seen other characters do the same or better (the cave in book six is pretty good, but that's already has best showing). All we see is “AVADA KEDAVA.” Cool, I’ve seen every damn villain use that stupid fucking spell and yes it is a terrible spell.

His plans are... well, they are shit. If your plans get permanently foiled by a bunch of meddeling kids, you should think about retirement, not world domination. The plan in "Goblet of fire" only works out because of dumb luck. "Orden of phoenix" works out because of Harrys incompetence. The plan to kill Dumbledore only worked cause Voldemort used logic and had one of his followers do the work for him. The rest of his plans fail gloriously.

Voldemort's goals. He... wants to be immortal, but why? Because he's afraid of death? Why is he afraid of death? He literally spent his childhood cutting open rabbits. He excelled in all fields of academia and is arguably very intelligent; intelligence tends to negate superstition. Okay, fine; let's assume he's afraid of death. But even if we look for another explanation: maybe he wants to live forever in order to stay in power.

Voldemort wants power...Why does he want power? Why does he want to, quite literally, take over the world? It makes no sense. He has no reason to care about any of that. Even if he's prejudiced against Muggles, what exactly gives him the willpower to actually gather followers, build a legion of darkdoom evil squad and kill everyone? His motivations are never explained, and he is introduced to the story as a 2-dimensional "bad guy". Even from the 4th book onward, Voldemort is never actually fleshed out. He simply goes from bad guy to "extremely bad guy/"super fucking evil". It's shallow. It's a bad character. He isn't even a character. He has no depth, nuance, relatability or layers to him. He's just a textbook douchebag who exists simply to give the protagonists something to do, because otherwise the stories would just be about magic school.

Let's look at the closest and most obvious reflection: Adolf Hitler. It's painfully obvious that Voldemort's movement is based on Nazism. But if you read Mein Kampf, Hitler actually believed what he was doing was justified, and provided reasons for it which he thought made sense. Even if it was objectively flawed, he believed it. That's what makes a good character in fiction; even if they're actually batshit fucking insane and critically evil, you can make them relatable if you go inside their head and show the audience why they're doing what they're doing. Even if the audience doesn't agree with the character, the audience understands why the character thinks this way. Unlike Hitler's diary, Voldemort has no level of self-introspection, no actual justifications. He's a walking plot device, and that's ridiculously bad for a 7-book-long story where he's the main antagonist. I don't remember a single interaction, scene or exchange where Voldemort is shown to have any degree of self-awareness. The youngest we ever see him is when Dumbledore visits him in the orphanage, and by that point he's already evil as balls, for seemingly no reason. Even when Harry is talking to him in their final fight, Voldemort only hisses and spits out superficial threats and a shallow understanding of the events around him, and actually has no idea who he is, or why he's doing what he does. . If he were a realistic character, this lack of self-awareness would build up over time, would create self-doubt in him, and he would go through a character arc where he "found himself" and learned what he really wanted. And then, maybe he comes back and does some crazy shit, but this time he does them with glorious conviction, and has no shame in admitting it. The audience knows him now, and he's a great villain. But that's not what we got. Remember the 13-odd years Voldemort spent floating around like a puff of gas, possessing rats and squatting in Quirrel's turban? Why did his character not develop? HE HAD THIRTEEN FUCKING YEARS TO REFLECT ON HIMSELF. He literally had nothing else to do. He could've become such a complex character. Think about it: a bland, textbook villain gets cucked into infinity and now can't actually do anything but bide his time. It would clearly affect his personality, especially if it lasts 13 goddamn years. But when Voldemort is revived in book 4, he's still just "look how evil I am.exe". He had literally no character arc of any kind. That's actually impossible. No sentient human being can have the same personality, goals and motivations after over a decade of exile. He's a badly-written villain, plain and simple.

It seems like a very poor decision to make the antagonist of 7 thick books this unrelatable and bland. It also makes no sense because Rowling has written consistently excellent characters throughout the series. Why not make Voldemort a real character?

So here is how I would improve Voldemort as a villain

Motivation. So since it's universally accepted that Salazar was against Muggleorns because he grew up in a time where Wizards and Witches were being burned at the stake. What if Voldemort had similar intentions cause he grew up in a time during WWII and the Cold War and saw how powerful and dangerous the Muggles were becoming with their nuclear weapons and wanted to protect magic kind from the Muggles and viewed the Muggles invading a possibility. So he became Lord Voldemort and formed the Death Eaters to finish Salazar Slytherin’s work to protect magic kind against Muggles and Muggleborns. It could’ve started out as noble, but turned racist and evil in the end.  

As Tom Riddle, he becomes the Minister Of Magic or given a position of power secondary to the Minister Of Magic. The Lord Of Magic. It’s important that prior to becoming Lord Voldemort, he should hold a position of political power within the Ministry Of Magic. In Hogwarts, it is said as a student Tom was charismatic, charming and a wolf in sheep’s clothing. So why not use all that for politics? He could use his charm and political power to turn the Ministry Of Magic against the Muggleborns and against the Muggles. He would write a book explaining in detail why he believes in what he believes and that gives him the following he needs. The Book in question would be called “Magic Is Might!” The old Pure Blood magical families and impressionable young Slytherins would follow him like moths to a flame.  He could use his newfound political power to research all forms of magic and even the dark arts. He could make Horcruxes in secret. As Voldemort he would gather allies who were rejected by society like Werewolves and Giants. But despite what the Horcruxes do to his face, he could use magic to keep up appearances. He wouldn’t just be seeking to wage war with the muggles and muggleborns. First Voldemort has to take over the Wizarding world. 

Treats his followers like allies. Voldemort does not use fear and the threat of death and torture on his most trusted allies. Tom Riddle’s the Knights of Walpurgis hold key positions in Tom Riddle’s administration and then the Death Eaters are born and Voldemort treats them with respect and admiration. In a sense, he treats the Death Eaters like family.

The First WIzarding War should have been about Voldemort waging war on the other Wizarding nations. This would truly show how terrifying and powerful Voldemort really is. Would also explain why the other nations did not interfere in the second war, cause they were that terrified of Voldemort. The Order Of Phoenix was barely able to win and drive Voldemort from power. 

Voldemort’s fall was because he was desperate. He was ousted from power and Dumbledore, the OOTP and Aurors are on his trail. His body is failing him, so he desperately needs to create a new Horcrux. So he kills The Potters. He fully knew that Lily used the love charm to shield Harry from him. So He saw a way out. Voldemort purposefully destroyed himself so he could gain a new Horcrux. 

Plus, we can have Voldemort hide the Horcruxes in the nations he conquered. So Voldemort can hide them in -Russia -Germany -America -Hogwarts -France Obviously Nagini would be by his side at all times and well Harry is the last one. For context of how Voldemort conquered these nations. Imperio, subterfuge, and mass hysteria. He took out the Wizarding governments and implanted them with his thrawls.

Make Voldemort as hated as Umbridge. Here’s how.

In my hypothetical scenario where Voldemort hides the Horcruxes in different Wizarding Nations, make 8 books. Book 7 ends with everyone graduating from Hogwarts and the fall of the Ministry. 

This way, after graduation, the Ministry has fallen and it ends with the Big Seven on the run. In Book 8 they are all on the hunt for the Horcruxes. Not just for Horcruxes, but international allies to unite the Wizarding world against Voldemort. It ends with the final confrontation being at the Ministry. Voldemort's endgame plan is not just to wipe out the Muggleborns, but wiping out the Muggles. He has the Magic equivalent to a Nuclear bomb. Voldemort wants to destroy the Muggles and recreate the world in his image. Magic Is Might! He plans on using it and Harry has to stop him before it's too late

Voldemort fails because the Horcruxes are failing him. It isn’t immortality, it is only temporarily longevity and every time one of his Horcruxes gets destroyed, his body breaks down and his soul is in an even worse shape.  When Nagini is destroyed, it is over. Voldemort thinks if he can kill Harry, he will live forever as the prophecy states “only one can live forever.” so he believes if he could just kill Harry, he can win. But Harry deflects his curses and sends it right back at him. Voldemort dies as he did in the book. Powerless, alone and human.

[morgana-ren]

For Anon: Just the alleyway scene! Here you go! 

There was no better display of the sickening plethora of filth that was ‘hero culture’ than the mall.

Hoards of humans crowding inside a concrete cage to throw their money at any cheap, shitty knockoff item with a famous face plastered on it. Kids ran amok, screaming and crying and leaving a trail of crumbs and slobber in their wake. Teenage girls and boys huddled around the hippest stores, fawning over the latest heart throb and shoplifting trinkets while no one was looking. It was absolutely disgusting.

They flocked to the stores like rats chasing poisoned peanut butter. Endeavor t-shirts, Uwabami makeup. Midnight lingerie. Fucking All Might everything. They all flew off the rack as fast as they could be stocked. Moronic NPCs shoveling every ounce of garbage they could find into their inventory. Every bone in his body longed to run his hand along the wall and just watch it all turn to dust.

His hatred of the general populace was one of many reasons Shigaraki didn’t make a habit out of leaving the bar. Assuming that Father had kept enough of his face hidden during his exploits for it to be somewhat safe, he still didn’t particularly enjoy crowds. People of all sizes, shapes, colors, smells, cultures, ideals, and morals but they all had one thing in common.

They all looked down on him.

In public, he always kept his head down, hood and hair covering his marred face. Hands steadily in his pocket, eyes on the ground. He pulled himself into his own body, doing his best to not draw any undue attention. It wasn’t for their benefit, of course, but his. If one more NPC stared at him, a single person let their eyes linger too long on his chapped lips, dry skin, scars, or emaciated form, he would snap and ruin everything. A massacre that ended in his incarceration would probably throw a massive sized wrench into the gears of All for One’s plan, and that was the last thing Tomura wanted.

Regardless, it made him so angry.

Not that he cared what they thought. They could drown in their own filth as far as he was concerned. He just didn’t like being stared at. It was so rude. These pack animals always pretended like they were so much better than everyone else, with their laws and their heroes. So superior. But the way they looked at him, the way their eyes crinkled in disgust, mouths agape, looking at him like he was a wet rat who crawled out of a sewer grate.

How would they look at him when their expressions were melting from their faces as they disintegrated into ash?

The situation made his fingers twitch and lip curl. Wasn’t it enough that idiot Stain had polluted the minds of the city’s villains with his ridiculous ideology? Did everything have to be such a pain in the ass?  

Luckily, Shigaraki had a few hobbies that helped to calm his mind. While drinking at the bar and crisping newspapers was always a quick and easy stress relief, he had always been particularly taken with video games. Not only did he enjoy them, but he was good at them. No one could look down at you for your appearance or ideals, the only thing that mattered in the end was victory, and that was a strategy he could work with.

It didn’t matter the genre, the rating, online or off, he knew he could dominate it. He never had much trouble climbing the rankings or leveling up. Nothing mattered but his prowess, his skill, both of which he had in spades. Not to mention, it allowed him to exercise his destructive and domineering personality without drawing any real attention to himself. In fact, it even made him cool. People would fight for his allegiance during battles or races, sending him an wave of friend requests and messages with offers from their guilds or promises of friendship from their groups. He didn’t care about that. He deserved the recognition. He was only getting what was coming to him.

But even video games weren’t completely safe from the influx of hero paraphernalia pandering garbage. Gaming companies flocked to video games featuring heroes like a fly to shit. It was easily avoidable, sure, but it still pissed him off that heroes could infect the one thing he genuinely enjoyed.

Still, he had to admit, it fun wiping the floor with famous heroes in those games sometimes. Even if the villains were hideously under powered. In fact, that made it even better. If he could win a fight with a nobody villain against a famous hero in a video game where there were limited controls, can you imagine what he could do in real life where the possibilities were endless?

Soon the whole world would see. This was only the beginning.

Frankly, there was only one downside to gaming. Most new releases from the companies he liked didn’t come out with PC ports for a little while after the game’s initial release, which meant he had to leave the safety of the bar and adjourn out into the world to get brand new games. Sure, he could send Kurogiri to do it, but more than once he had come back with the wrong game in the series, or even the wrong one entirely. It was a frustrating mess, and it was easier to just avoid it all together by going himself.

Besides, sometimes walks helped him clear his head. Sometimes.

That was how he found himself here. One of his favorite companies had just released a brand new action and adventure game that he’d been dying to try ever since he saw the trailer. He’d even had Kurogiri call in advance and reserve a copy. At least he could do that right.

Shigaraki needed this. Needed to get his mind off of the Hero Killer Stain and All Might and fucking all of it. He was driving himself mad going around in circles in his own head asking himself questions he knew he didn’t have the answers to. He needed to put his head in the clouds, if only for a little while.

So he dodged through the crowds of people, weaving in and out of families and groups trying to get into the game store before he finally lost his last ounce of sanity. There seemed to be more people here than usual, which just soured his mood even further. He should have known better than to come on a weekend. He grunted past several bystanders, biting his tongue to hold back the onslaught of insults fresh in his mind. It was only when he reached a rather impenetrable wall of people that he inhaled sharply, ready to start grabbing.

A large group of pedestrians had gathered in a circle around something, which was blocking off a large portion of the walkway and therefore his path. He mumbled under his breath, tempted to forcefully move them out of the way. What in the hell was going on that was so important that it saw fit to hinder him?

“Hey, isn’t that the hero class from UA?”

“Yeah! Wow! I saw them compete in the sports festival! So awesome!”

“You guys are so cool! What’s it like at UA?”

Shigaraki stiffened. So they were here. He peered upward for a moment and saw the class huddled together, some blushing, others posing, obviously basking in their new found fame. That kid was here too. The mop of hair and splattering of freckles was visible even from where he stood. That one willing to put himself in danger over and over again for All Might. Midoriya.

Maybe it wasn’t entirely a negative thing that he found himself here on this particular day. That boy obviously had his pulse on hero culture. Maybe he could explain why people were so taken with Stain and yet completely ignored him. An ear splitting smile cut through Shigaraki’s face, irritating one of the blisters on his lower lip. He wiped the blood and waited for the crowd to disperse as the students each went off in their own direction.

When it was only him and one other student, a young girl with short brown hair, he made his move. He started heading in the direction of Midoriya, grinning wider when the young girl sped off, leaving the kid all by himself. It was so perfect. He was about to reach out and make his move when he heard it.

A voice. A voice that made his blood pound in his ears.

He stopped cold, hand stopped short of the oblivious Midoriya’s shoulder. Instinctively, his head turned in the direction of the voice, heart thrumming in his chest. Surrounded by a couple of fellow UA students, she was standing in front of a window, joking around with one of the people nearest her.

Her. She was here

His fingers began to shake as he withdrew them from Midoriya, stuffing them back into his pocket before anyone noticed him. She was here. He should have known. She was in the class too. These kids stuck together like glue. If they were here, it was certain she was nearby. Stupid stupid stupid. He had almost blown his chance.

But he hadn’t.

He turned and stalked in her direction, staying only far enough back as to not draw attention, crimson eyes glaring into the back of her head. She was laughing at something some blonde idiot in her class had said. He felt his temper go through the roof, and allowed one hand out to scratch and dig at his neck. Why was she talking to him? Why was she laughing so hard? What he said probably wasn’t even funny. He didn’t like the way that guy was looking at her. Did he like her? Did she like him?

He felt a thin trickle of liquid down his neck as his scar reopened.

He managed to tame his anger just enough to keep from rushing him. Instead, he followed the group at a distance for a while, waiting for his opportunity. He overheard something about a camping trip and something about training. Interesting. He would have to make a mental note of it. However, right now, he had other things on his mind.

The opportunity finally came when a few of the students rushed ahead to drool over some restaurant while she stayed behind, digging in her bag for her wallet. They ran off ahead, yelling at her to catch up and complaining about hunger. He heard her laugh and tell them she’d be there in a minute, she just needed a second to get some cash out. She was alone. It was time.

He came up behind her, placing his hand on her shoulder, doing his best to mask his voice.

“Hey, you’re one of those kids from UA, right? You’re practically famous! Do you think I could get an autograph?”

He felt her stiffen underneath his hold. She knew something was off, a shiver rolling down her spine as she tried to turn and look at him. He was just out of the reach of her peripheral, hair and hood hiding his features.

“Y-yeah, I am.” She raised her hand as if to pry him off, but thought better of it. “If you’ll just let me go for a second, I’ll get in my bag and get out a pen and some paper.”

Her voice was on edge, her shoulder muscles clenching. He couldn’t help but smile again.

“I saw you compete in the sports festival. You came in fourth, right? It was so cool. I bet you got so many offers from agencies. I bet everyone wants you to be their hero.” He could feel her breathing getting more shallow, feel her neck flex as she swallowed.

“I-um-Sir, I don’t really feel comfortable being touched by people I don’t know, but if you’ll remove your hand, I’ll get you an autograph or a picture if you want.”

Sir. She had called him sir. It was adorable. He wanted to hear it again.

“I noticed you got your costume fixed too. I liked better it the other way, but that way is fine too.” He chuckled. “Hey, you’re a little tense. It’s okay, we’re friends, remember?”

Realization hit her like a truck. She inhaled, biting her lip as she turned her head as much as she could in his direction. “Shigaraki!”

He leaned down, perching his head on her shoulder. “Careful, you don’t want to make a scene. All Might might not be busy this time, but there certainly a lot of civilians around. A lot of your friends too. I’d hate for something to happen.”

“What do you want?” She snarled, making a slight effort to jerk away. He didn’t let her.

“I just want to talk. Is that so bad? Or are you too cool now to catch up with an old friend?”

“We are not friends!” Growling, she reached up and dug her fingernails into his wrist.

He giggled. She had certainly gotten more feisty since their last meeting. “That’s not a very nice thing to say. I thought we hit it off pretty well.

Before she could respond, the same blonde classmate came running towards them from inside of the nearby building. Shigaraki sneered, tightening his grip on her shoulder in warning. He was no doubt coming back for her.

“Hey! We got a table and be-Woah! Who’s this guy?” The kid stopped a bit short of them, shifting between looking at her in confusion and peering suspiciously at him.

Shigaraki leaned further in and whispered under his breath. “Unless the next time you want to see him is in an urn, I suggest you get rid of him. Quickly.”

She pulled herself together, smiling happily while waving at him. “It’s cool, Denki. He’s an old friend.” A sly smirk pulled at Tomura’s mouth. “We ran into each other and thought we’d catch up a bit. Don’t wait up! I’ll meet you guys there!”

Denki continued looking back and forth between the two of them, eyes lingering on Shigaraki for a brief moment before retreating. “Okay, then. I’ll save you a spot. Don’t take too long or I’ll eat your food too!”

As they watched him walk back into the restaurant, Tomura hummed. “You’re certainly a good actress. If I hadn’t known better, I wouldn’t believe you were lying.”

“Say what you need to say and then leave.” She hissed quietly.

“Walk forward and turn into that alleyway on your left.” He gripped her with his hand, careful to leave his middle finger levitating.

“Like hell! You think I’m just going to walk into a dark alleyway with the leader of the league of villains? You’ll kill me!”

“You don’t have a choice, hero. Assuming that’s what I’m planning, it’s either you or everyone else in this area, starting with Denki.” He began walking, shoving her forward lightly. “And if I start feeling anything funny, I’ll dust you first and then move on to them.”

She exhaled in defeat, shuffling her feet forward as Shigaraki steered her toward the desolate alcove. That rendered her quirk completely useless. Shigaraki would know if she was trying to use it on him, and she didn’t want to test his promise. She had no doubt in her mind that he wouldn’t hesitate.

That didn’t mean she couldn’t get the drop on him though.

Remember your training. Duck and jab. Get out of his reach!

Not quite halfway down the passageway, she ducked and lurched back, sending her elbow careening into his stomach. He grunted in pain as he was driven back several feet away from her, taken too much by surprise to bring his hand down. She turned to face him, readying her defensive stance as he recovered from the blow.

“This again?” He wheezed, rolling his neck.

“I’m not going down without a fight!”

Sighing, he straightened his back and held his hands up. “Have it your way, then.”

She sent a few punches his direction but he dodged the brunt of them, only landing one on his injured shoulder. It was exponentially stronger than the last time they met, enough to send him reeling backwards while grabbing at his weakened limb. He coughed a few times, quickly evading her other jabs.

“You’ve been practicing.” He noted.

“I train with Midnight every week in hand to hand combat to keep people like you away!” She sent another loaded punch towards his face, which he easily sidestepped.

“Looks like it’s going well.” He deadpanned, seeming unimpressed. “I’m getting bored.”

She ignored his prodding, sending a few low kicks to his shins. He brought his own foot up, catching on the back of her knee and yanking, sending her toppling to the ground. She growled in frustration, pushing herself away from where he stood and standing back up, immediately taking stance again. She charged him one last time, sending her leg on a collision course with his hip in the hopes to knock him aside, but he simply raised his arms, catching her leg and holding it.

Her eyes widened as she began to lose balance, but before she could fall again, he slammed her into the wall closest her back using her own leg as leverage. She cried out, letting her guard down. He used the opportunity to move on her, pressing against her and pushing her further into the brick as one hand slid up from her calf to her thigh, never relinquishing its grip, while the other calmly wrapped around her neck, middle finger flexing.

He could feel her erratic breathing. She had lost to him not once, but twice now, and it barely even took any effort on his part. Her frightened eyes searched underneath his hair, but it was too shadowed beneath his hood to see much of anything. All she could make out was his teeth, visible underneath his simpering lips.

“Quiet now. Your little outburst is bound to have attracted attention.” He placed his forehead to hers, leaning forward slightly to cover her face in a curtain of his hair. She tried to pull away, but he tightened his grip on her neck “Unless you want a whole lot of nice people to die, you’ll play along.” He pressed her harder into the alley wall, crushing her body with his. He hiked her thigh up around his own and held it there with the hand that still had a grasp on it, maneuvering his hips between her now open legs.

She made a sound of disgust, trying again to turn from him, but he dug his fingernails into her thigh, eliciting a shocked gasp from her. Through the tendrils of his hair, she could see a few curious people beginning to peak into the alley entrance, drawn by the sounds of their fighting. He pushed his face so close to hers that she could feel him smile.

“You’re not making this very convincing.” He whispered. “All it would take is one little touch and I could dust them all.”

She swallowed hard, closing her eyes and preparing herself for what she had to do. Slowly, she raised her arms up over Shigaraki’s shoulders, one hand resting uneasily on the back of his neck, the other tangling up into his hair. She let her leg rest up in his hand instead of squirming, wrapping her knee around his thigh and relaxing her stance so it appeared more natural.

Shigaraki was absolutely not a fan of being touched. In fact, casual brushes in the street were often grounds for a permanent ashing. But this? Oh, he could make an exception for this.

“Good girl. Make it seem like it’s just two lovers in an alleyway looking for a little privacy.” He could smell her again, that scent he’d been dying for, trying so hard to emulate over the past few months. His heart rate was reaching peak levels, but the blood was beginning to divert away from his brain. He couldn’t help himself. He ground into her a little bit, the front of his jeans scraping against her body as he rutted, feeling the warmth of her body.

“You’re despicable.” She seethed, swallowing down a wretch.

He giggled, letting his thumb run small circles over her exposed thigh. “Prove how heroic you are, Hero. Convince me these people don’t deserve what I could do to them.”  

He pushed his mouth to hers, instantly trying to snake his tongue into her mouth. At first she was unresponsive, until he brought the fingers on her neck together and clasped at a necklace she had been wearing. It crumbled instantaneously, sending a splay of ash down onto her chest. Almost immediately, she allowed him access, pliantly opening her lips for him to invade and slowly responding to his ministrations.

She tasted like she smelled, and it took every ounce of self control he had not to push her further. Although her movements were unenthusiastic and light, it didn’t matter to him. He knew he wasn’t exactly experienced in any of this, going off of tips he’d learned on Internet forums or books. He tried a few things, like biting and sucking on her bottom lip or fighting her tongue for dominance, but it seemed to make little difference to her besides the occasional tightening of her fingertips in his hair.

Despite that, he was almost beside himself. He could learn how to make her react to him in time. He was too focused on engraving her into his memory to care. He could feel every last bit of her body pressed against his own, every movement and muscle. Every curve she offered up to him and him alone and it was just like how he had imagined it would be in the dreams that had haunted his few dreaming hours ever since their first meeting.

Shigaraki had certainly not woken up that morning with the belief that he would have his tongue shoved halfway down her throat that day. If he had, he likely would have been in a much more amicable mood. Right now, he felt absolutely ecstatic. He had her right where he wanted her. 

Well, not right where, but close enough. She was submitting to him because he knew her weakness. He wondered, in time, how far he could push that weakness. How far was she willing to go?

But he was nothing if not a strategist. He wouldn’t push it too far too fast. He wouldn’t risk it. He would chip away at her resolve slowly, breaking away her boundaries one at a time until there was nothing left but her submission. If it meant threatening her friends, her family, random children on the street, he didn’t care. She would be his. He decided that a long time ago. She belonged to him, and frankly he didn’t really care what she had to say about it. It wasn’t her decision.

Eventually, the last of the onlookers had left, leaving behind a handful of heckles from teenagers and reprimands from angry parents ushering their children away while covering their eyes. Her hand was yanking at his hair erratically, not in lust but in a likely plead for him to back off of her finally so she could breathe. He gave himself a minute longer, cherishing the moment before withdrawing himself, unable to stop the grin that crawled up his face.

“See? It’s not so bad now, it is? You just saved all those idiot’s lives and all it took was a few minutes.”

She couldn’t stop herself. Her hands were shaking in rage, stomach churning. She’d never felt so violated. So utterly disgusted. She could taste him in the back of her throat and feel his leftover saliva on her lips and it made her want to vomit.

She looked directly up at him, and spit in his face. It landed with in an undignified blob sliding down his cheek.

It took Shigaraki a moment to fully register what happened. He unhanded her leg, bringing it up to his face and squelching the small plop of liquid between his fingers. Slowly, he raised his head up, finally giving her a full view of his face for the first time.

She immediately regretted her actions.

He looked enraged, eyes open with beady pupils staring down at his hand. His cracked mouth was contorted in rage, snarling while rubbed three of his fingers together, spreading the coating around. His eyes flashed up at hers, and his hand clamped down on her throat, fourth finger twitching unsteadily.

“You little brat.” He spat, tightening his grip more and more by the second until she could no longer breathe. “You think you’re all high and mighty, that just because you’re a Hero that there’s no consequences for your actions. That you can treat people like trash.” His fingers dug in with bruising strength, and the longer he held them, the more little black dots began dancing in front of her vision. Her chest was trying desperately to inhale, but she couldn’t with his palm crushing her windpipe. Fear welled up inside her, and the longer she struggled for breath, the more overpowering it became. “I can show you how wrong you are.”

“I-I’m So-orry!” She croaked out, pleading with him for air. His eyes flashed dangerously, and he loosened his grip only enough that he could make out her words.

“Speak up. I can’t hear you.”

“I’m sorry! It was-” Her mind raced, searching for the right words to placate him. “It was rude of me, and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done it. I beg your forgiveness, Shigaraki. Please forgive me!”

He let his hand sit firm for a few more seconds. He was still twitching with anger, but something about hearing her beg, beg him for forgiveness sent a wave of pleasure through him. Of course she was going to be defiant at first. He could forgive her this once. After all, she would be making it up to him in the end regardless.

He smiled down at her, ghosting his fingers on her neck as she coughed and sputtered, trying to catch her breath. “Just don’t do it again. I hate people with no manners.”

She shook her head, eyes bright and fearful. After that, she didn’t dare try using her quirk on him or bothering to fight him again. She was entirely at his mercy. This guy was insane. He didn’t even need to use his quirk to kill her. He would just suffocate her and leave her body in the alley way. What was his deal? Was he still harboring a grudge from their last encounter? Why was he here now?

Finally regaining her breath, she peered up at him hesitantly, studying his face. “Did you follow me here?”

He seemed taken back for a minute, before chuckling a little underneath his breath. “Follow you here? No. I was actually here for a completely separate reason and just happened to run into you. Isn’t that lucky?”

“Yeah. Lucky.” She grunted, lamenting her choices. She knew she should have stayed in bed today

“I was actually about to grab Midoriya when I saw you. I just couldn’t help myself.”

She furrowed her brows. “But why?” She didn’t understand what this man wanted with her. He didn’t seem to outright want her dead, but wasn’t content letting her live in peace either.

He let out a heinous cackle, letting three of his fingers on his free hand wander up to his neck and scratch. Why was he telling her any of this? “I guess I just find you intriguing.” He tore at his neck anxiously for a moment while she stared at him. The way she was looking at him was making him feel itchy and hot all over. Underneath his hoody, he felt like it was one hundred degrees, which given the weather, might not have been far off. He felt uncomfortable in his own skin, anxious, stomach twisting in knots. He hated that she had this control over him.

He pulled his hand away from his sweating neck, reaching up to touch her face once more. He wanted to feel her skin, how soft it was. Just wanted to graze his fingers across her face so he could remember how she felt even after she’d gone. However, when he raised it up by her head, the sleeve of his jacket rode up his arm, revealing the piece of cloth he had tied around his wrist.

Immediately her eyes were drawn to it, and she gulped hard, a horrified expression etched on her features. “Is that… Is that my…”

Shigaraki realized what had spooked her. Tied around his wrist was the unmistakable pattern of her costume, ripped from her torso during the attack on U.S.J. His eyes darkened. There was no sense in lying to her now.

“You recognize it, huh?” He lowered his hand down, bringing it between both of their faces. “I’ve kept it on me since.”

Her breathing became inconsistent and staggered, mouth agape in terror. “W-why?”

He leaned in again, scraping the cloth against her neck, hoping to siphon some of her scent back onto it. “I think it helps keep me focused.”

Her vision spiraled. She could ignore a few consistencies but this was all to much to be a coincidence. Something she had done had gotten his attentions enough to keep it on her, even endear herself to him in some twisted way. He wasn’t just doing this because it made her uncomfortable or to spite her like she initially thought. If she didn’t know better, she would say it was something resembling a crush.

“S-Shigaraki, I don’t-” She cut herself off. What could she possibly say? ’Hey supervillain, not interested?’ ‘Thanks for the flattery but I’m a hero?’ Our careers kind of make it impossible for us to be together but thanks for the interest?’

It didn’t really matter, she had a feeling he wasn’t interested in her opinion on the matter.

“You’re everything I hate, you know.” His voice was soft, gentle even. He had hidden his eyes behind his hair again, and despite refusing to move away from her, he seemed a few miles off. “You heroes. You piss me off. If I had my way, I would have killed every one of you the first time we crossed paths.” There was a distant cold in his voice that made her shiver. “I wanted to. Kill you. It would have been easy too. All I had to do is wrap my fingers around your pretty little neck and squeeze and you’d have been gone before you could even scream for help. I bet that really would have thrown one over an All Might too. One of his precious students turned to dust while he was in the same room. Sometimes I think I should have.”

There was no deception in his voice. He was telling the truth. Somehow it terrified her more than when he had gotten violent. He lowered his hand back down, grabbing her chin with his thumb and index finger.

“But I have better ideas now. There are worse things than death.” He lifted his head, and she felt her soul plummet. His eyes were manic and deranged, boring down into her with the promise of unknown horror. His smile was wide and frenzied, nearly breaking his cracked lips into shards all over again. There was a strange flush across his pallid cheeks, something almost akin to a blush, like he was flustered even thinking about it.

She wanted to cry. She wanted to crawl away. Find a rock somewhere and hide under it, anywhere where he couldn’t find her. Something told her he wasn’t saying this just to frighten her. The possibilities that could run through a madman’s mind were things she didn’t want to consider. Things that he considered worse than death were beyond the realm of what she wanted to realize herself. He placed another soft kiss to her mouth, and she was too paralyzed in fear to stop him.

He looked like he was about to speak when Denki’s voice rang through the alley way. “Hey, what gives? We’ve been waiting forever!” Both she and Tomura turned their heads toward the entrance to see Denki standing there with a beaming smile, eyes closed and holding up several bags of food in his closed hands. “We didn’t wait for ya, but we got you leftovers! Took us forever to find you! What the hell are you doing down here anyway?” He opened his eyes and nearly dropped the food, face red with embarrassment as a few of her classmates crowded around as well with equally shocked expressions.

“Someone’s getting’ some.” Eijiro whispered to a blushing Mina who was giggling behind her hand. Momo scowled over at the pair, giving them a death glare.

“Are we interrupting something?” Fumikage asked, trying to be as polite as possible in the given situation.

“I didn’t realize you were with so many people!” Shigaraki immediately withdrew his hands, stepping away from her but taking care to keep his face shadowed. “Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to keep you held up.”

Eijiro chuckled at his words and she felt like she could just die.

“I’m off then. It was nice catching up. Don’t worry, we’ll see each other soon!” He spoke loud enough for them to hear before he leaned inconspicuously and whispered in her ear. “If any of you follow me, I’ll get angry. I’d hate to kill half his class without All Might here to see it.”

He started walking but stopped short a few seconds later. “Oh! One last thing, hero.” He pulled her in close to his side, hands fishing his phone out of his pocket. “You promised me a picture.” He held his phone up, getting one snapshot with her in frame. Although his features were still almost entirely hidden behind his hair, she was completely exposed, expression like a deer in headlights. It would do for now. He placed his phone back in his pockets, giving her one last look before turning away and ambling off down further into the alleyway, turning out of her sights after a few seconds.

“Aren’t you going to introduce us to your friend?” Mina called, still giggling behind her palm.

“No!” She shook her head vigorously, trying to hold back the tears and the sick that were clawing their way up her throat, acting as natural as she could. “Look, can we just get out of here? Please?”

Her friends all looked at her confused for a moment, shrugging before following her as she took off.

As he heard their voices drift further and further off, Shigaraki brought his fingers up to his lips, grazing where hers had been. He still tasted her, and he was trying to savor every moment. He didn’t know for sure how long it would be until she was in his arms again, only that she would be. He needed to calm down. He needed to be patient.

He forced himself down the streets and passageways away from the mall, farther from her but thinking of nothing but all the while. His head didn’t feel any clearer, if anything it felt more clouded and stimulated than it had before, but he was fine with that. He didn’t get to ask Midoriya what the difference between him and Stain was, but that mattered little to him now. There would be other opportunities for that. He did curse himself as he remembered he had forgotten to pick up his game, but he shrugged it off. If his estimates were correct, it wouldn’t be available for much longer anyway.

The sun sank behind the horizon, giving way to the darkness of the night sky. When he felt secure enough, he placed Father back on his face, making his way back home under the cover of shadow. His body was shivering, but not from the cold. He could hardly believe anything that happened today.

When he finally turned the knob to enter the bar, Kurogiri immediately turned towards him in a panic.“Tomura Shigaraki, is all well? The mall you attended today has been shut down. I was worried that you were detained and perhaps incarcerated.”

“Don’t be stupid, Kurogiri. I’m right here.” He lumbered over to the bar, sitting half-haphazardly in the seat. Kurogiri decided it was better not to question him, opting to pour him a drink instead. He turned towards the TV, which was playing news footage of the mall, giving minimal details about the incident but describing a notorious villain spotted there. “So she told.” He muttered under his breath, smirking. “I figured she would.”

Kurogiri heard his words, but decided it would go against his mental health to question Tomura on the incident if it was indeed what he thought it was. Revealing his face would have far reaching consequences for the league. Judging by the way he was lovingly picking at the ratted material tied around his wrist, he had found that girl again. So his obsession hadn’t in fact died. This would not bode well.

The rest of the night continued on relatively average. Tomura drank and cussed and ranted about All Might and the Hero Killer Stain, staring down at his phone in the intervals. Kurogiri polished his glasses, offering advice where he could and bearing the brunt of Tomura’s abuses when he couldn’t. It almost gave him hope that maybe Shigaraki could put this whole incident behind him instead of obsessing over it like he often did.

That is, until most of the way through the night, Tomura stumbled off the bar stool, clinging onto the counter as he shambled towards his room in the back. He paused momentarily, turning to face Kurogiri for a few seconds before slamming his door.

“Hey Kurogiri, you know those old storage rooms we have? I need them cleaned out. We’ll be having a guest soon. I want to make sure she’s comfortable.”

[ayatosmlktea]

𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧

Word Count: 1.7k

Dabi x Reader

A/N: I’ve had this idea in my head for months, but I’ve been too scared to write for other animes. I mean the worst that could happen is no one likes it, so why not! This is inspired by Atlas - Keshi because his voice makes me think of Dabi sooo enjoy this Dabi angst! Also thanks @suckersuki​ for being so nice and supportive! Also pt2. Finding quirks are hard. Okay that’s it!

Warm summer breeze caressed her skin, like the gentle embrace of a familiar lover. Orange rays of a setting sun cast over her as she sat on the front steps of her apartment. It was comfortable, quiet, her favourite kind of weather. Golden hour, quite the opposite of how she felt inside. It was wrong, the feelings bubbling in her chest were making her feel disgust. Why were butterflies in her stomach at the thought of him? She was stupid, it would never work out. They were from two different worlds. He was trouble, he hurt people, he was a villain. He was everything she stood against as a hero.

So why was Y/N hoping that he would stay for more than just a quick fuck. Her eyes were unfocused, fixating on one spot of concrete while her thoughts were elsewhere. She couldn’t even remember how their strange relationship, if you could even call it that, had started. Every thought of his hands on her body had her heart speeding up, her fingernails digging into her palms as she scolded herself for craving his touch even more.

 Dabi was different, no one had ever made her feel the things he did. And he didn’t even have to try, the way he looked at her was enough to steal the air from her lungs. She hadn’t seen him in a while; and while it was probably a good thing considering that meant he wasn’t causing trouble, Y/N felt a hole burning into her heart. She couldn’t help the long nights she’d lay awake, staring at the ceiling wishing that he was next to her. It was just sex, it didn’t mean anything. 

So why was she falling in love with him against her better judgement. Sighing heavily she stood up, walking back into the lonely empty apartment that only felt like home when he was in it.

Y/N kept hoping, despite the fact that she knew it was irrational, that he would show up. She was tired of sleeping in an empty bed.

‘God listen to yourself, you sound pathetic.’ She couldn’t help but scoff at how needy she sounded. Beginning her nightly routine, Y/N ignored the feeling of paranoia as she bent over to rinse her face off.  He always liked to scare her from behind whenever she was washing her face. Y/N didn’t like to admit that she was lonely but before she had met Dabi there wasn’t a lot going on in her life that she looked forward to. Sure, she was a hero and that was something she was proud of. But something about the way he actively sought out danger was...exciting.

 Pulling the thin covers over her head she tried not to think about his arms snaking around her waist pulling her back flush against his chest. Every good memory of Dabi was always accompanied with ones of his destructive nature. Ones that reminded her why they were never meant to be, why they shouldn’t have even come together at all. What they were doing was wrong, falling in love with him was wrong!

At the end of the day, Dabi was a villain and she was a hero.

✧*ﾟ✧*ﾟ✧*ﾟ

Looking around the city district lit up with smoldering blue flames, the sounds of civilians screaming all around her and blood dripping down the side of her face, Y/N was reminded of why Dabi was everything she stood against. Her legs were burning, screaming for her to stop running. Sweat mixed with blood as it dripped down her face onto her hero costume. She couldn’t stop, not until everyone had been evacuated. Cursing under her breath she kicked herself for not seeing it sooner.

Dabi’s disappearance never meant anything good.

The league’s numbers had grown since the last time they had attacked the city, the number of villains was easily greater than the heroes they had available. It seemed hopeless, there was only so much they could do without destroying the whole sector. Even then it seemed like a losing fight.

‘Snap out of it! Focus!’

Shaking off her doubts she handed off another scared child to the paramedics, he had a couple cuts on his face but nothing that wouldn’t heal with time.

“T-thank you for saving me” Her heart melted at his mumbled thanks. Flashing him her brightest smile she ruffled his hair affectionately. These were the moments she lived for, saving people.

Another explosion had the ground trembling under her feet and Y/N was off running again.

The fight had barely begun and her limbs were already begging her to stop moving. Her quirk wasn’t the strongest when it came to being on the offensive side. She could remove one of a person’s senses but the longer she used it the greater a toll it took on her mental and physical energy. Her only saving grace was the years she had spent honing her combat skills.

From her peripheral vision she could see Endeavor’s flames, although having the number one hero on the scene did nothing to calm the anxious storm brewing in her stomach. Knowing who they were up against, having Endeavour there was only going to add fuel to the fire, literally.

Another explosion of blue flames on her right sent glass and debris flying towards her. The force of it had her ears ringing as her body was flung to the ground, the feeling of something sharp jabbing into her shoulder blade pulled a choked cry of pain from her throat. A mixture of orange and blue flames were blurred together as she unsteadily climbed to her feet.

“Fancy meeting you here” That low voice she knew all too well sent bolts of electricity down her whole body. Gritting her teeth together,  Y/N moved out of Dabi’s line of vision before taking away his sight. She needed to move fast, incapacitate him while she still had the upper hand. Dabi merely chuckled, a small ball of flames engulfing his hand.

“I don’t need to see you to know where you are doll’ Y/N hated the mocking tone of voice he used, like she wasn’t strong enough to take him down. Dabi moved out of her grasp with ease, even without his vision he was adept at avoiding her moves.

“Missed you” His smirk that once had her heart pounding against her chest now made her want to smash his face into the ground.

“Shut up” Her chest was heaving, the hit she had taken earlier was throbbing incessantly. The stabbing pain in her back made each inhale shorter and more frequent. It was an exhausting fight. Had she not spent so much time moping in bed over a guy who didn’t really love her and had focused her energy on training, maybe she would have been able to take him down.

“If it hadn’t been for you we never would’ve pulled this off, you’re a real hero Y/N!” The cold sharp laugh Dabi let out froze her blood.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” The strain of holding her focus on keeping him blind was testing her mental resolve. Y/N moved to incapacitate him from behind again only to have him whip around in time to send another blast of blue flames hurtling her into an alley. 

She felt broken pieces of glass digging into her skin, the pain substantial enough for her concentration to slip. The grin Dabi gave her was feral, her face and arms were burning and the tips of her hair smelled burnt. He was faster than the first time she had fought him, within seconds he was at her side. His fingers gripped the hair at the base of her neck pulling back so that she was facing him.

“Amazing the things technology can do, don’t you think? You should really keep confidential information off your phone, doll”

“You bugged my phone?” she seethed, her vision going red.

In that moment she had never hated him more, the damage he was more than happy to inflict on innocent people, on her, was enough to prove that he had never really cared for her. Using whatever energy she had left she removed his vision once again, using the milliseconds she had to take him by surprise. Straddling his waist, she put every pent up feeling of rage, heartbreak and betrayal into her punch. The satisfying crack of his nose breaking was enough for her to keep going.

“I fucking hate you!” She screamed, but she couldn’t tell whether her words were directed at Dabi or herself. One of his hands grabbed her arm, white hot pain travelled up her arm eliciting another scream as his hand print was burned onto her skin. Her focus slipped again, his eyes met hers with a carnal rage that she had only seen once before. She hadn’t even realized she was crying until her tears dropped onto his face.

“What’s this? A hero crying over a villain? How pathetic” He sneered, flipping their positions once again.

“You’re such a fucking dick” she hissed through clenched teeth, bringing her leg up to knee him in between his legs. Dabi grunted, his hand immediately closed around her throat, squeezing hard enough to leave her gasping for air.

“You’re a fucking pain in my ass” before Y/N knew what was happening she felt his lips against hers.

The kiss was anything but gentle, his teeth bit at her lips hard enough to draw blood but she matched his energy. Her fingers tangled in his thick black hair pulling him closer against her. Teeth clacked together as they fought to dominate the other, his hand gripped her hair painfully but it made her moan regardless. Pulling apart only when they were panting for air, Y/N stared into his eyes finding the expression she had been missing for weeks. 

The blood dripping down his nose and lips made her stomach clench in a way that wasn’t considered hero-like at all. She couldn’t help but crave his touch, the damage was done. The second he’d branded her arm she had lost the fight. Weeks of ignoring her, of making her crave his attention had all been for this moment. He had never planned on letting her walk away.

At the end of the day, Dabi was a villain and she was his.

[jcmorrigan]

blakeworther- I personally I love your hc’s so much- any au’s or anything ya got for them? I really wanna know more about what goes on.

This was once again a BAD QUESTION TO ASK

Aside from the Skyward Sword AU, which I never went back to again, there’s only one AU that I like for Blakeworther, which is the AU that I like for everything ever. I’m not even sure I consider it a true AU, even though it absolutely is. So, okay, I have this thing called the WHAM ARMY, which is a massive crossover group of my favorite villains (led by the eight who make up the acronym but this ain’t about them). Obviously, because Victor, Vincent, and Albert are all pretty firmly villains (even if they lean “those weird morally bereft people we end up being friends with somehow”), I want them to join the WHAM ARMY. So my thoughts for them here are pretty much how they’d react in a multicrossover setting, which of my other villain loves they’d get along with, and what the intro arc is for them. Keep in mind I haven’t gotten here in the fanfic yet, so some of this could change in practice, but here are my plans right now.

Cringe ahead.

-They aren’t the originals. I want to make something that doesn’t trip over canon’s current trajectory, even though I don’t know exactly where canon is going, so what happens is that Vexen (Kingdom Hearts) is going to rebuild the three of them as replicas, since he can easily find memory cores for Victor and Vincent in Myers’ storage rooms and there’s just going to be an Albert core there for no reason.

-Vexen then pulls some Chain of Memories magic and restricts the memories they have access to. They will only remember things we have literally seen in VTSOM/TWDAK, and then I can have him release more of their memory banks to them as we get more chapters. (Even if they all three get redemption arcs, my replica versions can stay little shits!)

-He DOES NOT tell them that they’re not the originals! For all they know, they fell asleep at the last day they remember and woke up here. But they figure it out on their own despite his best efforts. They still want to get their memories back anyway so they know what the people they were replicated from were like and have a framework to build their personalities from.

-Yes, of course they’re cyborgs! Cyborg replicas. Since they’re operating by KH rules, they prooooobably don’t need to eat human meat? But also I like when villains do fucked-up things and I have jokes about the others packaging “cyborg chow” to embarrass them so maybe they still do engage in a little cannibalism, as a treat

-Each was engineered with a different specialty. Vincent’s is raw physical strength; he can walk into a gunfight without even needing a weapon and still have a chance of winning. Victor’s arms have been upgraded to hold a variety of cannons; he’s the team sniper. Albert is the team “mage”; he can conjure Dream Eaters. In this AU, TWDAK Dream Eaters and KH Dream Eaters are basically the same thing. Albert has mastered a strange art of being able to draw Dream Pieces out of the Realm of Sleep and implant them in physical forms of creatures in the waking world, creating his army. They look like they do because he hates the pastel aesthetic of KH Dream Eaters and redesigned his personal ones to look more fitting with his aesthetic. He’s also a speedster.

-The intro mission involves Vexen attempting to track down a newly-rebuilt Xion (this AU is divergent from KHIII) in Radiant Garden so he can bring her back under his control with some brainwashing. I’m also bringing in the Tsviets as past experiments of Vexen’s, so he’s basically pitting his newer models of experiment against his old ones.

-The party he already has built by this point is going to be Demyx, Simon Laurent (Infinity Train), Tsumugi Shirogane (DanganRonpa), skekSil (The Dark Crystal), and a couple other people I haven’t hinted at instory yet and don’t quite want to spoil. But Simon, Tsumugi, and skekSil will all also be Vexen’s creations - Simon and skekSil are replicas and Tsumugi is an android.

-Vincent, Victor, and Albert wake up for the first time, and while Vincent and Victor remember each other as friends, they’re just like “And why is our nemesis from RMU also here?”

-Albert probably fights with Vincent for dominance of the trio and I’m not sure which one of them is the trio leader at this point.

-I moved Nine Bean Hill from World of Final Fantasy to Radiant Garden because Radiant Garden needs a coffee shop and first of all, thanks to Hunger Games Simulator fuckery, my friends and I have an in-joke about Vincent Edgeworth having an eternal grudge against Dunkacino, so I’m going to use the coffee shop to reference this somehow without having to put actual Corporate Brainwashed Al Pacino in this ‘verse

-But also I like to think Lann and Reynn play a lot of bubblegum pop, so catch Victor and Albert dancing to the PA like idiots and then getting Demyx, skekSil, and Simon in on it while Vincent and Vexen are like “Oh God why are these our friends”

-(There are reasons this particular Demyx goes by a different name instory and it’s weirding me out to type “Demyx” for this post)

-Without spoiling too much of the arc, there IS a part where Blakeworther beats up the Tsviets, there IS a part where they battle the Anima summon from FFX and win, and there IS a part where despite all of this, Xion kicks their asses across the city

-They go through this mission seeing each other as partners and friends (though Vincent and Albert are reluctant to use the “friend” word at first), but after they all get back to base, they’re just...suddenly overwhelmed with the fact that they’re strangers in a strange land missing half their memories.

-They room together, and they end up crawling into the same bed for solidarity reasons. This is actually where I first envisioned the “rough day” sleeping position - Vincent and Victor are chest-to-chest, then Albert just snuggles in behind Victor and the other two are like “Okay, we’re gonna just let this happen” and Vincent and Albert touch at one tangent point where their arms cross.

-The days might get a little rougher after they realize they aren’t even the originals.

-Eventually they assimilate into the chaos house with no problem.

-Vincent tends to hang out with the party poopers of the house. Especially Mozenrath (Aladdin: The Animated Series). (P.S. If there are any VTSOM fans out there who also know the 90s Aladdin TV series...I CAN’T be the only one who noticed the surface similarities here, right?)

-Victor Blake and Roman Torchwick (RWBY). Oh, God, this is the hell duo. They’re party animals who love to dance and drink and dance drunk. It was not a good idea to let these two redheads meet.

-Albert and Neopolitan (RWBY)! They both love stabbing people and Victorian button boots! I actually kinda have this idea that they would pick up more fucked-up serial killer types to hang out with them - Mad Madam Mim (The Sword in the Stone) is their patron despite being a much tamer example, but Albert also decides he really likes Scaramouche (Samurai Jack), Junko Enoshima (DanganRonpa), and Jerome Valeska (Gotham).

-For a real deep cut, Albert also opens up a joint Dream Therapy office with Dr. Cheshire Broach (Crypt TV). It’s either called “Krueger & Broach” or “Broach & Krueger” depending on how long it takes either to notice that the other moved his name to the front of the sign again. You should ABSOLUTELY not trust either of these men to give you legitimate therapy (though if you’re good friends with them, they can and will use their dreamon powers to help you best your nightmares in a bloody fashion).

-Actually this ‘verse is the entire reason I thought of them doing drag karaoke to “United We Stand” by Amberian Dawn because the WHAM ARMY is all about karaoke, drag, and any combination of the two

-I haven’t decided yet if their romance will be a slow burn or a faster affair. I’m expecting them to tell me as I write out the fic. But I think in a lot of respects, it’s going to be more of a friends-to-lovers story than their original forms had. The three of them are forced to become an elite cyborg warrior unit created by the same mad scientist, they had a big bonding mission together where they became ride or die (whether or not they want to admit it), and eventually...we can start revealing that they’re CATCHING FEELINGS.

-The WHAM ARMY has many, many power couples and ships of various numbers of people but Blakeworther ends up becoming yet another POWER THROUPLE around base, and it’s understood that messing with one of them will earn the wrath of the other two

-They go on to assist in many, many missions with the purpose of taking over various worlds and kingdoms and just fucking them up

-Vincent Edgeworth will kill the TBTC equivalent of Dunkacino

You have to understand that TBTC is my hyperfixation to end all hyperfixations. Every piece of fiction I touch ends up related to it in some way. At some point the majority of how I interact with Blakeworther is going to be through this AU. I’m just a sucker for crossovers and villains having a place to be bros and party.

[murasaki-murasame]

Thoughts on Fruits Basket 2019 2nd Season Ep25 [”I’m Different Now”]:

For the season finale [but not series finale, because they’ve already announced a third and final season for next year], we get a huge plot twist that completely changes our perspective on one of the characters, and their various relationships, in a way that has major implications about the future of the story and how things will progress.

Aside from all that, we also get the world’s worst gender reveal party.

Thoughts under the cut.

Just to start off, this episode adapted chapters 96 and 97 like I figured it would, to wrap up this season with a big cliffhanger to hype people up for the final season. And for better or worse, this was a pretty much 1:1 adaptation of these chapters, so there’s not really any differences to talk about that I noticed.

Anyway, I may as well just cut right to the chase and talk about the whole Shocking Gender Reveal Plot Twist[tm], now that that’s out in the open and everyone can stop tiptoeing around it.

It’s not like I’ve really tried to hide it or how I feel about it as a plot point before this, but I really do dislike it on basically every level. There’s a whole lot to unpack about it, but really at the end of the day it’s just one of those old-fashioned plot devices where we’re meant to think that someone being a different gender to what you thought they were is inherently something scandalous and shocking. They could have at least immediately started talking about the idea of her being raised as a man against her will, since that’d at least give it some actual meaning and value, but they don’t, which really says a lot about how that’s actually kinda just a foot-note that the story doesn’t dwell on much, and in practice we’re just meant to be surprised that she’s a girl.

It doesn’t really help that the season just ends right there, when in the manga this whole sequence keeps going in the next chapter, and I think they start touching upon that part of Akito’s backstory then, but the anime won’t get into that until next year at this point, so I think it’s fair to take it as it’s presented right now.

The idea of Akito being a girl is surprising in basically the exact same way that it’d be surprising if we found out that Haru was a Sanrio fan, or something. That is to say, it’d be vaguely surprising, but then we’d all just go on with our lives.

Even at this point you can definitely guess that there’s probably something going on with her being forced to present as a man, but it hasn’t really been explained or touched upon yet, so it’s all pretty nebulous, at least from the perspective of someone like Tohru who barely knows Akitto at all and doesn’t know all the stuff about her past that Kureno does.

In general I’ve never been a fan of this entire trope to begin with, but I think it’s made a lot worse by the fact that, as you get further into the rest of the story, it becomes clear that it’s not even that important, and the majority of what’s going on with Akito’s character has much more to do with the curse situation and how it impacts her relationship with the zodiac members. The whole deal with her character is how being the god of the zodiac from birth forced her to be pretty much raised in seclusion, with her only frame of reference for human relationships being abusive cult behavior. She’s miserable and twisted because she isn’t allowed to live a normal life due to her status, and her possessiveness gets enabled by the people that she clings onto, putting her into a loop of arrested development and mental instability.

And literally none of that has anything to do with her gender, lol. None of it would be different if she was a cis man, or if she had been raised as a woman. Because that whole deal isn’t actually all that relevant to why she is the way she is, why she has the attitude and world-view that she does, and why her relationships are so fucked up. Even if you decided to write out her romantic/sexual relationships with people like Kureno and Shigure by having her be a man, that’d barely change anything about the story as a whole, because even if it was entirely for platonic reasons Kureno would have still decided to stay with Akito and ultimately enable her actions, and Shigure would most likely still more or less do all the same things he’s already done. And obviously to begin with, if Akito was actually a dude that wouldn’t even necessarily mean you couldn’t still have some of these relationships play out this way, so you can’t even really act like the story required her to be a girl for that reason, lol.

And for better or worse, if Akito was written as a gay dude, it could still totally have lead to all the same stuff with her possessiveness over the male zodiac members, and her irrational hatred of the female zodiac members. It’d just be a different, more homophobic sort of trope than what actually happens, in a way that plays out in basically the exact same way. It wouldn’t be the first time we’ve gotten a villain who’s a gay dude that irrationally hates women for Reasons [tm], and who has ominous and sinful relationships with men.

Which is also the reason why I don’t exactly think the story would be ‘better’ if she had been written as a gay dude, or as a trans woman, or anything like that. With her whole role in the story to begin with, it’d play out in an obnoxious way no matter what. Mostly I just kinda wish they had completely avoided this sort of outdated, schlocky storytelling to begin with, and just focused entirely on the more interesting stuff about her character.

And in terms of outdated tropes, we haven’t even gotten properly introduced to Ren yet, lol.

I’m also assuming that they’re not exactly planning to change anything about this in the anime, so I’m just going with my existing thoughts about how the manga handled it, since that should still carry over to the anime.

I know that this is all just beating a dead horse with a stick because of how long the series has been out for, but I still just can’t help but be irritated by this whole mess.

I don’t want to spoil it too much, but I think a good comparison to make is the recent Banana Fish adaptation, and how from what I gathered, most people’s reactions to that series’ ending was ‘I know it’s just a product of it’s time, but this is just kinda unironically shitty’.

Ultimately, I think a big part of why this annoys me so much is because I actually really like Akito’s whole character and what the story does with her after this point. I just dislike how it’s shackled to this unnecessary plot twist that ends up dominating the conversation surrounding her even though it’s barely relevant to anything after this in the story.

The stuff with her being the god of the zodiac and how much it fucks up her entire life and all of her relationships is genuinely really compelling, and represents an integral part of the story’s overall message about the nature of abusive families and cults, and the various ways they end up hurting everyone inside them. Her whole arc is about learning how to embrace a life that’s not based around being a god surrounded by their followers, and I think that aspect of it works really well, especially with how it ties into all the stuff with Tohru later on.

I also think that all the stuff with Kureno that gets revealed in this episode is genuinely really interesting, and is ACTUALLY a plot twist that meaningfully shakes things up, and people actually have a reason to be surprised by it. Especially Tohru, since her whole goal at this point is to break the curse, and now she’s literally found someone who’s already had their curse get broken. It’s basically the first major lead she’s found in her whole search for answers, but in the end it kinda just, y’know, gets overshadowed by the gender reveal and her being shocked about that instead.

It’s also still really interesting to me how the Kureno situation is basically the only time where the story seriously talks about the implications of the animal transformation part of the curse, and how someone in the zodiac might internalize that part of themselves. Most of the time, the animal transformation part of the curse is kinda irrelevant, and the series could work in 99% the same way without it. I think Takaya’s literally said before that she didn’t even plan to include that whole aspect of the story until her editor suggested it fairly late into the process, and I think that shows with how it’s kinda just there for some wacky hijinks early on, and then it just gets benched in favor of the actual stuff Takaya wanted to write about.

But with Kureno we actually get a look into what it meant for him to be able to literally turn into a bird, and how losing that ability affected his sense of identity and how he engaged with the world. It’s still ultimately just metaphorical in it’s own way, but it still feels like more of an acknowledgement of the fact that they literally turn into animals than basically any other part of the story, lol. And in general I just think it’s at least compelling on paper that he ends up shackling himself of his own free will, because that sense of freedom and disconnect made him feel obligated to stay with Akito to ‘make up for it’.

I just wish that Kureno as a whole was interesting enough for me to actually care that much about all of this, lol. In the end he’s just kinda intentionally boring, and it’s more interesting to write about his role in the story than it is to actually, like, watch him do stuff as a character. Which I guess is all just part of how much it bugs me that all of the interesting stuff in this episode, and this whole part of the story, feels like it gets overshadowed and drowned out by a dumb shock value plot twist.

There’s also all the thematic stuff with how he’s basically Tohru if she was taken advantage of and had all of her own bad habits enabled until she ended up barely being a functioning adult. He even has his whole personal conflict about feeling like moving on with his life and developing new relationships is an act of betrayal towards someone that he really needs to let go of at this point. But then you just get into the whole Uo thing and how their whole relationship is about as compelling as the whole Cinderella plot that it’s clearly a reference to, and aaaaaaah why is this series so frustrating, lol.

Really, the fact that I can gripe so much about stuff like this just goes to show how much I like the series in general, since I can’t muster up any strong feelings about stuff like this if I just straight up dislike it as a whole. At least for me, stuff like this is much more frustrating when it’s one part of a larger story that I really love. Thankfully there’s more good than bad when it comes to this series, so I can still hold onto it as a personal fave that I just happen to have complaints about.

I’m genuinely really excited for the final season, in spite of all this, since there’s a whole lot I love about the final third of the manga, and in a funny way, the fact that Akito being a girl isn’t actually that big of a deal in the long run, and what actually happens with her as a character after this is more about her status as the god of the zodiac, actually means that I’ll [mostly] enjoy a lot of it. It’s mostly just this specific part where we get the Big Reveal [tm] itself, and the immediate lead-up to it, that bugs me.

Anyway, as a whole, I still think this is a good episode that serves as a fitting cliffhanger for the season. The actual plot twist that most of the episode focuses on is really good, and serves a really meaningful role in progressing the story, and it gives a pretty clear picture of how we’re entering the final act of the story.

Hopefully the final season will start in April next year like the first two seasons did, but it’s entirely possible it might get delayed because of the whole pandemic situation. But I could live with them holding off on starting the final season until it’s ready to come out.

Also, before I forget, they haven’t said anything about it, I’m pretty sure the final season will also be around 25 episodes long. With how many chapters they have left, if they stick to the same two chapters per episode pace that the anime’s had on average thus far, they could easily cover the rest of the story in 22 episodes, which would be a lot easier to expand by an extra two or three episodes, than it’d be to condense it all the way down to 13 or so episodes.

[imaginationcemetary]

Swapfell Purple, Swapfell Red, and Underfell skeles reactions to having a kid that acts like a villain but really just has a hard time processing and expressing feelings? Evil laughter, plots world domination, lots of pranks that they boast about being a part of their masterplans,acting like they don't care about anything or anyone. And it is convincing until they find out the kid cares for stray kittens they hide in their closet. Cue kid's denials. Sorry if it is too specific. Have a nice day.

Nah, don't be sorry for being specific, it actually helps me out a lot more than you think. If you tell me what you're looking for then I can make sure I'm actually giving you what you want. You gave me some wiggle room so the answers won't be too similar, and I actually think the prompt is really, really cute. Also, you're the first person to ask for my Fell boys, so I hope you like them!

(Underfell Papyrus) Bamf:

Bamf sees a lot of himself in his kid and is really proud of his little mini me. When he was younger he used to act a lot like they do now. He wasn't really allowed to process his emotions due to how he grew up, so he'd put on an air of confident standoffishness and assholery around others, only getting to work on things when he was alone. So he gets it, and does his best to encourage his kiddo in whatever they do, giving them the time they need to process things their way. You wanna laugh like a cartoon villain? We're going to practice evil laughs together until you get it just right. You've come up with a plan to conquer the world? Let me just look it over for any holes or blind spots. Unfortunately, much like Sadie's mom Barb from Steven Universe, he has a bad habit of being overly supportive. He wants his kid to be happy, driving them to be the best at what they do, which can lead to the feeling burnt out and unable to fulfill his high Hope's and expectations. He'll never let his kid pretend not to care though. This is the surface and they don't have to live like that anymore. If something hurts, then it hurts, even if you don't know why.

When Bamf was just a bitty bones, he hid a kitten in his closet and raised it himself when his brother Fell told him that they couldn't afford to take care of it. She was a pitiful white furball that eventually became his truest companion. She was dubbed Doomfanger, because someone as terrifying and awesome as him had to have a just as terrifying and awesome of a pet, but he calls her Doomie when no one else is around. When he find out that his kid is doing pretty much the same thing he did, he gets really proud and feels like it's something else they can bond over. He tells the kid that they don't have to hide the small litter of kittens in their closet any longer. Doomie winds up adopting the litter as her own and soon the house is over run by a small army of kittens that both dad and child dote on together.

(Underfell Sans) Fell:

Fell gets it, he raised his little brother Bamf when they were bitty bones; he's dealt with this once already. The fake accents, the evil cackles, the plans for world domination, the pretending not to give a shit about anyone else because they're scared about what others think about them. He gets it, really....it just...gets annoying sometimes. He's totally down for diabolical prank wars with them though. Fell is pretty content to let his kid figure things out on their own, and when he's not, his involvement is a lot more subtle than his brothers. He's got ways of making his kid open up to him that'll make them think it was their idea the whole time.

Let me just say, that Fell hated his brother's cat, he thought she was evil incarnate. Despite not wanting her around though, he never actually thought about making him get rid of her. So when he finds his kid hiding a kitten in their closet, he has some flash backs to Doomfanger and her irrational hatred of anyone who was not Bamf, and is understandably pissed that his kid has been keeping this from him. He doesn't like the kitten, the kitten doesn't seem to mind him, but he doesn't actually tell his kid to get rid of it despite not wanting it around. The kid can keep the cat as long as they promise to take care of it themself and keep it in their room....It doesn't stay in their room for long and Fell eventually just accepts his fate to be plagued by fluffy things with a penchant for scratching him and then using him as a bed. He just hopes this kitten will help his kid soften up like Bamf's did.

(Swapfell red Papyrus) Rust:

Heh, you're plotting world domination? That's cute. Need your dad to help you build world dominating contraptions for your plans and props for your pranks? He's totally down. Wanna ramble about your plans and how much you don't care about anything? He'll chill with you and listen to whatever you're rambling about now. Need someone to hide behind when one of your ingenious pranks back fires on you? He's not gonna let anyone fuck with his kid, he'll dispense his own consequences if they go too far though. He actually pays a lot of attention to his kid's behavior and tries to engage with them in creative ways, figuring that they're acting out like this because they want attention. He's not gonna let his kid act like a total little shit, but that doesn't mean he's not gonna be laughing in the background when situations call for it.

Rus isn't the type of parent to snoop through his kid's room without a decent reason, but he is really perceptive and bears his kid quietly hushing their kitten's meow in the middle of the night. He's surprised at first to find out that his kid took in a stray, but then he feels pretty proud of them for it. He knew there was a soft spot in them somewhere and now he knows exactly how to nurture it. He'll wait for his kid to bring it up with him before he says anything, but he'll also secretly leave food and treats for the kitten outside his kid's door so that they feel comfortable and ok enough to talk to him about it, knowing that he'll support them.

(Swapfell red Sans) Razz:

Razz butts heads with his kid often, their similar personalities clashing and leaving both of them wishing for the attention and affection that they're missing out on. Honestly though, if his kid wants to act like a villain, then he's going to show them how to do it right. He'll push them to join clubs like the debate team or mock trial, because if they want power then they'll need to either get into law or politics. He won't interfere in any of his kids plans or pranks, but he will watch and then point out ways they can do it better next time. He wants to help them improve and reach their potential, but he's used to being more hands off. He's bad at expressing himself, but he wishes his kid knew that they don't have to try so hard to impress him.

Razz is more than a little upset to find a kitten in his kid's closet. How long has it been here? How come his kid didn't ask him to keep it first? He knows they don't get along well, but do they not trust him? When his kid comes home from school he'll have a conversation about their secret keeping and whether or not they're responsible enough to care for their new pet. If they decide to keep the kitten, it would help the two of them start opening up to each other more, helping them explore and express their feelings after the conversation.

(Swapfell purple Papyrus) Syrup:

Syrup is good at dealing with troubled children, but even he has difficulties with his tiny tyrant. He swears he'll lose his good eye light from rolling it so hard one of these days. He'll play along with his kid's hair brained schemes, plots, evil laughter, and pranks because he thinks it's hilarious to watch other adults get offended, but the whole time he'll subtly be trying to figure out why his kid is acting like they don't give a shit about anything and be thinking of ways to deal with that.

Syrup is actually pretty chill when he finds the kittens in his kid's closet. He's always had a soft spot for strays and castaways. He'll playfully tease his kid about their own soft spot despite their denials, but then he'll also ask them if they want to sign up to volunteer at the local animal shelter. Whether they decide to keep the kittens or not, Syrup realizes how much an emotional support animal could help his kid start dealing with their emotions better and researches how to get them registered for something like that.

(Swapfell purple Sans) Berry:

Berry is the type to sit his kid down and talk to them about their behavior. Why do you want to rule the world? What would you do with it if you did? What are some things that made you think it would be a good idea? He'd start looking closer at his kid's life to see what might need changing or what might be making them so unhappy that they feel like overturning everything. He won't let them pull any pranks that would hurt anyone else, but he finds the evil laughter harmless. He finds it disconcerting that they so vehemently claim not to care about anything. It reminds him of his brother's apathetic behavior and he wonders if he needs to look into therapy for his kid.

When Berry finds the kitten in his kid's closet he realizes that just like his brother having a soft spot for kids, his kid must have a soft spot for animals and not feel very comfortable displaying their softer, kinder side. He'll have a talk with them about trying to keep the kitten a secret from him and then he'll have to decide if his kid is responsible enough to continue taking care of the kitten or not. He agrees to let them keep if if they promise not to hide things like this from him in the future. He wants his kid to feel comfortable and safe enough to come to him with their problems, and he feels like it'll negatively impact them by being punished for coming clean about their issues.

[a-collection-of-villainous-aus]

BLIND AU PT SIX THE REWRITE PT2

Link to part one

He never directly tried to look at White, lest his moronic kin figured out he was blind, tongue tasting flesh, lingering smoke on salted skin, feeling his pulse actually grow in pace…interesting.

Even in this position, his doctor was at his chest...he really was tall, this creature belonged to him and he would not let this little bitch take what was his.

Demencia was staring from one of the doorways and then face palmed hard, this was not the plan, not the plan at all, he was supposed to just lean on him and say to white can I help you know ...get off my property as well as away from my doctor then slingshot him out, not this....just...fuck.

Acylius who had no clue of the plan or what was going on, was outraged, he thought this was the best course of action to take then FINE!

Pupils turning into slits, snarling he pulled him over his shoulder, down to the ground pinning him on the floor by his throat.

“You like to make your little displays and assume you are the one in charge, why not be truthful my little gremlin and tell White here that I made you my toy and you liked it.”

If Black Hat was honest, he’d let Flug take him right there in front of White, that dominant display had his heart rate going through the roof.

Amadeus never wanted this moment to end, his doctor had never done anything like this, he could sense Acylius on all fours above him, a whine escaping him, let Flug know how he felt, let him catch his scent maybe it would finally get to the demon above him to finally take him.

In his dark world, feeling tender touches were the light he would no longer see, but the warmth was so much more than that, he wanted to lean into his hands and give in, a growl bubbled within his throat but before it comes to full completion he felt Acylius’s lips pressed to his, it was passionate, desperate as if the Legion wanted to devour him….god how could he resist, hands rising up, tangling in his hair, returning the embrace with just as much fervour.

White Hat was just watching, stuffing popcorn into his mouth that he’d poofed into existence and enjoyed the show, his pupil blown wide, what a show, only to catch Demencia glaring at him, she looked down then back up at him in disgust, like she got it but seriously right in front of them.

“Dude take your tent pole and fuck off, they’re having a moment!”

If there was one person he did not get along with, it was Demencia, she left him unsettled and was about to disappear, he was going to need lube and his right hand after this display.

“But he said he resisted and –“

“Fuck buddies have you never heard of them, surprising considering you’re all about them!”

“That still doesn’t make sense!”

“A private life, have you never heard of that either!”

Well White was confused to say the least and perhaps it was best to leave, he’d text Acylius later, his brother was indeed the jealous type but apparently nothing official so it wasn’t against the rules to dance with the doctor.

When Thaddeus left, literally the moment he’d gone popcorn tub spilling on the floor Acylius let Black Hat go, Amadeus was just laying there, now staring out into the eternal darkness because honestly what else could he see, but the taste of Flugs lips, the sensation of his scars, he’d never known Acylius had such signature scarring…

And then reality came crashing back down on him, wait did this mean, his doctor was not disguising himself, that he’d let White see his true face…those scars meant that every photo he’d ever seen of Flug , he had on file were some character disguise…no one knew how he looked…not that looks were important…but still to not share that with him…

He wished he could see, to know him completely.

Pushing his face away, claw tips pressed to flesh, turning from him, the mood changing from Acylius actually stroking his cheek to coldness with Black Hat’s reaction.

There was a pang of regret in what the old demon had just done, oh no there had been a crack there, the doctor had shown affection, it only dawned on him the moment he stopped feeling that subtle caress under his eye.

“You expose your face to that, insipid fool and remind me in your attempt to show dominance what you refuse to allow me the chance of seeing!”

That was when Hat felt the confusion leave Acylius and a heavy foreboding feeling replace it, moving back, he looked up at the door and slammed it shut with a wave of his hand, he would contact White later.

Of course he couldn’t hurt the demon below him, but he still chose to pick him up by his throat with one hand, so that he was face to face with him, Hat was still clasping at his face fingers flexing as if fighting an urge to scratch him before Acylius none to gently grabbed his wrist and pulled it away, Hat’s stunned expression was surprising to say the least, even Demmy was standing there wide eyed as she heard the change in her friends voice…it was like Amadeus’s when he was mad only deeper…rougher…demonic …oh he was really, really pissed off.

“And why should I show it to you, you who acts like a petulant child when I dare to talk to someone outside of this company, we are not dating, we are not in a relationship if I decide I want to climb on top of your dumb fuck brother for my own relief I will…”

Dropping Hat unceremoniously with a thud, he stood there above him

“Yet still you seem to believe to can own me…even though…”

His glare was colder and darker than the depths of the ocean; he towered over the blind demon at a height of six ft seven.

“Even though you, you will bed whom you please , I am not bound to you in that manner and you have no right to see my face as it does not help with the progress of my work.”

Placing a foot on Black Hat chest and pinning him back against the floor, he would probably be punished later for putting Black Hat in such a demeaning position, but he didn’t care, his master needed a strong dose of reality, leaning down further than any human could cause you know perks of being a demon.

Acylius raised a brow as Black Hat sucked in a breath and actually looked…flushed?

It was hard to miss that shiver from him as a growl rumbled in his chest.

“I wear different faces with the aid of the hologuise you were once so impressed by, no one has seen my face in centuries, it clearly shows how easily you have forgotten my abilities Lord.Black.Hat.”

His face softened only slightly as he could see the realisation on Black Hat’s face.

“Yes I see, you understand now, you nearly killed me in the assumption I be so disrespectful as to just prance around with my real face on display simply because you were blind…do you…do you really think so little of me?”

His gut twisted, that slight pause and crack of his voice the old demon could tell he’d really hit a nerve, how could he tell him now he thought he was sun , moon and stars and so much more, Acylius would not listen to that not after this.

“But I could feel your scars…”

Amadeus returned weakly, waiting to sink into the floor and he knew he could but he wouldn’t he had to stay for this…after nearly killing him, yes it was an accident but his own jealously had caused it, he should have known it was something Flug would never do.

Acylius snapped a guttural snarl leaving him

“Your own powers are too sensitive to be fooled by magic that conceals one identity through touch, you know more about how I look now than anyone else…the last people to see me as me are dead and buried centuries ago.”

Silence passed between them, Hat had no answer to give, feeling Acylius remove and hearing him sigh wearily…and the slight flap the kind when ears droop….

Did Acylius have ears…demonic ears, the kind closer to animal ones?

“I will still be communicating White Hat later, informing him I am still free for our dinner date, if he has not been put off by the idea.”

“I hope he has, he needs to learn to stay away from what is-“

Mid way through his snarling comment, Flug immediately grabbed him by his shirt front, only to slam him into the wall, of course it did not hurt Black Hat…at least not physically, his body leaving a dent in the wall, he remained silent because under all that anger he heard something else…desperation.

“Will you just for once be quiet! I am free to do as I please in these matters; there are more things at hand that you do not even realise because you are so up your own arse!”

“What are you talking about?”

Hat returned sharply.

What on Earth had gotten into his doctor to seek out White of all beings, he easily freed himself from Flugs grasp, only to misjudge how high he’d been lifted off the ground, his head was swimming…Acylius actually wanted to date his brother?

It took him a moment to realise he’d not hit the floor, but that Flug had caught him, he hoped he was facing him directly.

His doctor’s hands felt firm and sure on his waist, under his coat, he was sure he felt a slight caress of Acylius’s thumb as he listened to the sombre tone of Flug’s voice

“It does not matter until it does.”

“I see...would you at least walk me back to my office?”

He knew Acylius wouldn’t...but some small part hoped just maybe he’d say yes.

“No, I need to have a word with Demencia, 505 please escort him back to his office.”

“I understand.”

Despite looking stern, standing upright, under his hat, his ears were hanging low, the only sign that his words hurt, hidden away under his trademark clothing.

Acylius looked over at one of the many doorways, a mess of green hair poking out, distracted momentarily by the soft baw of his creations voice as he took Hats hand.

The old demon didn’t even argue as his claws curled around 505s paw, allowing himself to be guided by a big teddy...this was his life now apparently.

As Amadeus walked with him he could sense it, Acylius was actually watching him until he was out of sight, perhaps his doctor did not detest him entirely, his heart beating just a little faster at the thought...he should not be so eager to wish for such a thing.

It was enough to drive one mad.

Once he was sure Black Hat was far enough away from them, he folded his arms, he was feeling a mix of emotions he truly did not want to deal with at this moment.

Calling Demencia from her hiding spot as if she were some mischievous child, she stepped out, hands together and looking at the floor, a foot shifting as she tried to explain

“He was only supposed to lean all over you and get White to go, the boss likes you Doc and-“

Acylius put an abrupt stop to that, cutting her off

“He does not like me, not in the way you are insinuating, I am simply another notch to be carved into his bed frame or desk. He will never make me a number on his chart, I will never give him the opportunity to laugh about me with someone behind my back, to simply use me like a toy to then throw out after he’s played with me...I have more self respect than that...our boss if you are somehow not aware of this is a cad!”

Demencia blinked, oh...Acylius really was of that time of devotion and loyalty...he had the elements of those who period dramas of gentlemen that were loyal and would shed their blood to save the one they loved...and were torn when the lover broke their heart.

How many pieces was it in, she wondered, recalling the years of students they’d known Hat to have bedded even after Acylius became Black Hat’s scientist.

Scrubbing his hands down his face, he was so tired, but rest would not help, there were experiments to still run, things to try, he was going to fix Hat’s sight or at least try every damn thing possible.

No matter the cost...the only ones safe from him were 505 and Demencia.

“But why White, he’s an idiot-“

“Despite being a moron, Thaddeus is one of the few ancient Eldericht’s Black Hat has not killed in a show of dominance, he might actually have at least some idea on how to help Black Hat! “

As she watched him, it suddenly dawned on her just how exhausted he looked, a subtle sway of his body, his glamour was clearly wearing thin as she saw the dark circles under his eyes, he’d been hiding it from all of them.

Poor Acylius he was love sick for a man he refused, Demmy wanted nothing more than to comfort him, but he could be as stubborn as accepting help as Black.

“With your plan and Black Hat’s actions, White’s mind is now no doubt playing out scenarios and ways to...I will go as far as I have to if there is any hope for Amadeus.”

“You should tell the boss what you’re doing and-“

“NO! If I do that he will stop me, not because he feels any affection, but his own pride and possessiveness over his toys will get in the way.”

He grabbed her shoulders, he was a man at breaking point and he needed her to listen

“White is my frantic attempt, I am willing to give him what he wants of me, you just have to promise me you will not say anything until I know it is a dead end.”

Demencia didn’t flinch as he held onto her, at this moment she was observing his actions, his grasp was actually gentle despite the firmness, she’d been aware on how much he cared, but it was this moment that showed the despair he’d been concealing, how much he wanted to help.

“You know Doc, you are allowed to ask for assistance, you’re gonna break like a china doll like this.”

She wanted to place a hand to his face, offer solace, but that was a particularly sensitive subject and so opted for his shoulder.

“No...not with this, Hat’s blindness, if someone found out, if the wrong people...at least with White I know he will agree to a Legions promise if it means he will bed me or have my blood.”

“Fine but you want me to keep quiet, rest, get to bed and sleep, you can’t work like this.

Flug looked at her and nodded, sighing, perhaps she was right.

Sleep was needed if he wanted to keep his mind sharp on the subject.

Flash back Hat’s pov.

The hour was late, his office smelled of off world cigar smoke, akin to bonfires, his taste for Earth brands did not suit him at all.

Rich scents of what a business man should smell of clinging to the atmosphere, a grandfather clock ticking loudly, breaking the sound of silence.

Black Hat was struggling to focus on the papers spread about his desk all the words were a blur to him.

His mind was lost, wrapped around the thought of Flug, his voice even though it was softly muffled by the plastic of that green bin, that brilliant mind, the moments he’d laugh, how he moved...

His students practically threw themselves at him...so why couldn’t the one he stared out at over the sea of faces look towards him, draw him into the depths of his embrace and promise him only himself...gladly would he wade through the people to reach out to him if Acylius only offered his hand.

Ever since their first meeting, when they’d gone over his inventions and papers together, shoulder to shoulder, he’d stolen glances at the exposed neck and yearned to touch...still now months later the fires within him burned so brightly it was agonising, the flames were cold and Flug was their only warmth.

Often following Acylius in the shadows, stalking him, watching as he went about his day, smiling when he’d wear that cerulean scarf given to him by a ‘secret admirer’.

When he wore it with that long black coat that hugged his body just right...mmm, it had certainly led to a few lewd thoughts.

So what if he couldn’t see his face now, one day he’d see it right and no matter what...it’d be beautiful because it belonged to Acylius, it was his.

The air about his student drew him in closer, leaning back in his chair he knew at this time Acylius would be in bed, clothes strewn over the floor and sleeping, he’d watched him often enough.

He’d told himself only one time...until it was every chance and finally he’d given in and crawled into bed, always wary of his sleeping patterns making sure he remained in his slumber...yes only once...it was supposed to be just that, but the warmth and closeness was etched into him and he craved it after that.

Flug’s presence alone soothed the age old monster that wanted nothing more than to curl up to him, watch as he drew, see how animated his hands became as he talked about things that excited him...

Then there was that one Halloween.

Acylius was wearing a plague doctors costume and the attention to detail was gorgeous.

Posies clasped in one hand and cane in another, he surveyed him over the rim of his glass, tall and towering above the other attendees at the party, whom were all gathered in groups giggling, drinking or using substances...it was as if the eyes of that mask was waiting to see which student would die from their own incompetence...and he fucking loved it.

He’d given a few students a moments attention by dancing with them, Amadeus wanted him to see his grace and hoped Acylius would be impressed only to see by the seventh dance he’d disappeared at first his heart sank until he felt a soft tap on his shoulder and this was the moment that truly sealed the obsession, the moment before he felt the urge to climb into his bed and steal away moments unknown from him.

The Legion demon knew perfectly how to dance like in the days of old, such a beautiful waltz, a hand on his waist, the other gasping, lacing fingers with the other, Hat never forgot how they felt on him, inside he was screaming, please carry me off take me to bed, use me as I have used others if you must...but please just...

By the end of their turn about the dance floor Acylius simply gave a respectful bow and left him there...Black Hat refused to dance with anyone else that evening and even so by then everyone was so far gone nobody cared.

Placing a hand in his pocket, his heart skipped a beat, the posies Acylius had been holding had been left there, he would keep them, they were far more of a treasure than the greatest wonders of the universe to him.

His hands rubbed over the top of his desk, yes a wonderful memory that had him unable to hold back, he was an addict, that urge within him would not be silenced, clawing to reach out and take him there, every part of him ached and would only be comforted by the embrace of Acylius Flug.

Travelling through shadows, slipping under the door, he stood now watching over Flug’s sleeping form.

He was trembling, he shouldn’t be afraid, he was older than time itself and yet as he looked down at the now bag covered face, body tucked under covers, wondering what if Acylius woke up this time, found him there...cuddling him...straddling to place kisses at his neck, he’d never take it further than that...it was a risk he was willing to take, it always was.

The room was dark and he was quick, so if that happened, he could leave quickly, let Acylius mistake him for a dream or...nightmare.

Sliding under the covers cautiously, still clad in dress pants, waistcoat and shirt he pressed against him, his student still asleep, soft breathing and gentle heartbeat, nuzzling against his neck, taking in his scent, an arm over his chest, that night had been different.

Still in his slumbering state Acylius had turned on his side and cuddled him...those arms were around him and his sleeping pattern felt even more relaxed, Black Hat was slowly stroking a small piece of hair that had been exposed as the bag had lifted slightly at the back of his neck.

Just for these moments he could pretend they were lovers.

He would kill anyone who dare to share Flug’s bed like this, these were his moments.

End flash back.

When 505 had escorted Black Hat to his office, Amadeus had asked for him to bring a meal fit for a king, of course the bear, eager to please made a sound that was as close to YES SIR as he could manage before going off.

Leaning back on the plush leather chair he felt the top of his desk for a small latch, pricking his finger tip on it, the top opened inside a thick folder, not some flimsy folder, it was made of volcanic crystal, perfected and beautiful, it’s sheen treated to look blue instead of his famous red.

After all it was Acylius’s favourite colour.

There was another blood seal, he pricked a second finger and opened the folder which was more a case, inside it was lined with deep blue padded velvet, removing a glove he caressed over the contents, soft petals kept alive by magic, preserved and still perfect after these fifty years, his greatest treasure.

A pocket full of posies.

End

[diloph]

Pardon me, but it seemed from some of your posts on KOTM that you didn't like Mark Russell that much. I know he was a cliche everyman type, but what exactly made him any worse than others in these movies?

I apologise if this isn’t my most coherent answer. I’m a little bit stressed at the moment, trying to finish the next chapter of IIID and create relevant, if poorly assembled memes before the Invader Zim movie is released.

To be honest, some of it is a bit tongue-in cheek. Making fun of the most visible character in the film, considering that he hates Godzilla with a burning passion, is just a little bit of fun. It’s like how I refer to Rick Stanton with disdain sheerly because he’s somewhat based on Rick Sanchez, who I don’t dislike either.

The film isn’t about Mark: King of the Fathers anyway, so if I completely despised him, I could just zone out during his scenes, or skip them when the DVD comes out.

But… some of it wasn’t so jokey. He’s still an okayish protagonist, I’ve got nothing against the actor himself and his acting is fine. Still, Mark was loud, abrasive and hated Godzilla; you know, things that grate on my nerves when it comes to a 2+ hour Godzilla movie and that made the character… trying.

We’ve had them before, but Godzilla was generally more villainous and obviously, we feel sympathy and camaraderie with him as the title character and we are here to see him do cool things. Having a human protagonist who hates our cool monster protagonist makes sense in universe, but ultimately, it’s not what we’re here for. We can tune that out.

As for what makes me dislike Mark… for starters, he’s kind of a prick. I once saw somebody describe him as the type of guy who thinks that if he speaks loudly enough, shouts enough, he’ll get his way. I can’t say I blame them, in that first meeting with MONARCH, he’s downright hostile.

He’s also, for whatever reason, the guy that everybody turns to in the crisis. He might have a background in bioacoustics like his ex-wife and animal behaviour besides, but apparently nobody else at MONARCH is capable of doing things without the express instructions or approval of everyman Indiana Jones. Military procedures, common sense, the desperate plan to revive Godzilla; everybody seems to defer to him really quickly.

It took me out of the movie. I understand that he’s meant to be our relatable protagonist, but it’s a little bit jarring and it happens multiple times. Mark is either issuing instructions or is along where he shouldn’t be, given control of a situation where by all rights he shouldn’t have any other than spur of the moment hero stuff.

It’s like he believes that nobody has any common sense and frustratingly, a couple of times the narrative agrees with him or at least proves his actions right. For example, when Colonel Foster tries to brief MONARCH on the actions of Jonah and the terrorists, he shoots down her theory and proceeds to go on a rant as to why we should Destroy All Monsters.

He’s right, as Jonah wants to free King Ghidorah, but he has this frustrating “protagonist only” habit of noticing threads that other characters really should (nobody seems to notice that the Titans are attacking capital cities or at least very densely populated areas until he points it out), then speaks about it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

Which when MONARCH is meant to be staffed with scientists of multiple disciplines veers back into the incredulous. I can suspend disbelief when it comes to giant monsters, I don’t excuse people not seeing what’s in front of them.

And as for the moments where he really shouldn’t be issuing instructions, take a look at when Rodan is freed by Emma Russell. Serizawa instantly defers to him (I think that Mark might have been his senior before he left MONARCH and BOY do I want to talk about that plan later on) to cook up a plan instead of… himself (Director of MONARCH, or at least I assume so) or again, Foster, who controls the planes and men he wants to send at the giant pterodactyl that just shrugged off a molten lava flow.

Given his characterisation as an angry, driven father who is desperately looking out for his family after being bereaved by monsters and is butting heads with the scientists at MONARCH, I think it was an attempt by Legendary to recreate Joe Brody. Bryan Cranston’s character in the previous film was killed off too early and was featured in a lot of the trailers, giving a wonderful performance. When he died to be replaced by his son, Ford, it caused a backlash as a result.

Mark being that angry, snarky character definitely shares some similarities. But while Joe was a crusader for the truth and more than a little bit obsessive, he was trying to pierce the veil as to why his wife died, without realising that it drove his son away from him. He was trying to reveal this great coverup to the world and spent the rest of his life doing so with such conviction that he appeared crazy.

Mark… doesn’t have this driving force. He lives in a post-San Francisco universe. Monsters Exist and everybody knows it.

Now, that’s not to say he doesn’t have reasons for acting as he did. He lost his son and has driven a wedge in between his family via his drinking problem (but let’s face it, compared to unleashing the Titans by starting off with Space Dragon Satan, he’s taken it comparatively well) but he acts as if he’s the only person who has ever lost something to Godzilla and the rest of the monsters.

Even when that happens to characters in the film, Mark still acts like that and it doesn’t make him look like the grim, determined hero, it just makes him look like an obnoxious dick. It isn’t his way of coping with the trauma of loss, he just… does it.

Part of me does get why he’s annoyed and angry with MONARCH’s attitude towards the Titans. He’s correct that they’ve been keeping secrets, dangerous ones at that, but equally the kaiju are living things. They’re dangerous and unpredictable, yes, but MONARCH have been taking precautions; killswitches are present in even the supposedly benevolent Titan’s chambers like Mothra and as far as they know, all of the Titans bar Godzilla are dormant and those that aren’t are kept in check by him. Had the Ghidorah Crisis never arose, we may never have seen any other Titans for the rest of human history.

But he treats everybody around him like an idiot with little to no prompting. Mark is brought on as a consultant and he then proceeds to dominate the scene, either through his decisions in universe or the part written for him out of it. He gets the last word, the last say on a plan or a witty remark or whatever.

And some of that costs lives. Actually, no, a LOT of it costs lives.

So, to start off, when the operation in Antarctica goes tits up, Mark grabs a handgun and goes into Outpost 32 by himself (though what he and the central nervous system of MONARCH were doing on the ground and not supervising from the Argo remains to be seen, but I digress). He stops Jonah and the terrorists on the walkway… screwing up Foster’s attempt to take down Jonah, forcing her to snipe his henchman in order to save Mark’s life.

This leads to King Ghidorah waking up. Not going to extend him a great deal of blame for this one, as with a sniper present, Emma or Madison would have been forced (or “forced” in the former’s case) to retrieve the detonator and the Six-Eyed, Six-Horned, Flying-Golden-People-Eater would have gotten loose regardless. Hell, I spotted clues that he was gearing up to wake up without Emma Russell’s help.

In a narrative sense, its his character that also sets up Vivienne Graham’s death. If he hadn’t been stuck in the tangle of wires and metal aboard the Osprey, she would never have needed to stay behind to help and subsequently got singled out by King Ghidorah.

I’d definitely agree that this is more of a personal thing on my part, as I’d wanted to see more of Vivienne’s character thanks to her actress’, Sally Hawkins’ work in The Shape Of Water and that in the previous film. But in a way, he is still sort of responsible for her being written out and replaced with the vastly less interesting replacement characters of Rick and Mor- erm, Sam.

That said, I know that Ghidorah is 100% to blame in universe. He killed her because he was a bastard and I wanted to him to be a bastard, so the monkey’s paw curled a finger there, so that’s egg on my face. It certainly did wonders for establishing him as a monstrous villain who we love to hate.

I’m not wholly unsympathetic to Mark. Like I said before, the pain of loss over the 2014 attacks hurt him badly and the film doesn’t shy away from this. Mark’s descent into alcoholism is noted by both himself and his family as a rough time for all involved, part of the reason he left MONARCH in the first place. Having his daughter and ex-wife seemingly kidnapped by dangerous ecoterrorists who plan to unleash giant monsters to mass-cull humanity also wears his patience thin, as you might expect it.

But he keeps this… horrible attitude throughout the movie. The world is literally going to shit, another monster is about to be unleashed and he asks if MONARCH have had enough common sense to evacuate the town of Isla Del Mara and if Rodan has had a cutesy name all picked out from mythology for him ahead of time.

Fuck me, if I was Serizawa, having just lost my protégé and quite a few well-meaning soldiers who were trying to rescue somebody who turned out to be a massive ecoterrorist nutjob, I would have floored him. There is a time and a place for snarky comments and it is not after at least twenty people you worked with are dead and BILLIONS MORE MAY FOLLOW.

But now, one of the points that really got me disliking Mark Russell follows here. The scenes that start at Isla Del Mara and the luring of Rodan to King Ghidorah, all the way up until the detonation of the Oxygen Destroyer.

Rodan emerges from the volcano and asides from spreading his wings and roaring, doesn’t do much. He spots the incoming Argo and its entourage and narrows his eyes. Uh oh! Surely, at this point, the dastardly destruction god would leap from his perch in an attempt to chase this challenger from his territory?

Um… no. No, actually, he stays put.

Now, I get that Rodan might not have stayed that way for very long. From the ensuing chase scene, I can gather that the Monsterverse’s version of Rodan is a bit of a dick, but he still didn’t start the fight.

Instead, what happens is that Serizawa asks Mark what they should do and Mark comes up with the plan to get Rodan to fight King Ghidorah in the hopes that one will kill the other and that would at least solve one of their problems.

Sound in theory, yes, but it is not sound in execution. At all.

So, that little town that Mark kicked up quite a fuss about? As you might have noticed, it’s lying between Rodan and the Argo and is part of the reason that the big ol’ bird should be lured away, to complete the evacuation.

Mark’s brilliant plan has the jets surrounding the Argo to blast Rodan and 180 the superplane in order to get him to chase… without factoring in THE TOWN BETWEEN THEM AT ALL.

I get King Ghidorah was closing in. I get that Rodan is a wild, unpredictable animal who could go off the chain at any moment. But there was absolutely no time to get the ARGO to move a little ways around the island before beginning the attack? At worst, Rodan would make a dive for them anyway, but that’s what the jets are sent in to distract him are for. To grab his attention and then lure him to the Argo, which would then take him to Tricephalopathic Terror Town anyway.

As a result, Rodan utterly OBLITERATES Isla Del Mara simply by passing over it and so many of the people they were trying to evacuate die a horribly pointless death. It never once passes his mind (or let’s not beat him down solely) or that of anybody aboard the Argo that a creature with wings that size that can fly would generate an unbelievable amount of force simply by flapping once to create lift? He’s also dripping lava, so even if the hurricane level winds that follow him weren’t an issue, having something with that amount of residual molten rock passing overhead doesn’t seem like a healthy thing to expose Isla Del Mara to.

Further dislike ensues when one of the miraculously surviving Ospreys issues a mayday during the Rodan/Ghidorah fight and the cargo doors are jammed. Mark the Hero leaps up with gritted teeth and desire to get things done, asking the way to the hangar. After all, he’s had miraculous problem solving abilities so far, why not?

“Which way to the hangar?” he asks.

Sam, a character who I’m even less fond of, stands up and offers to show him the way. Fairly brave, considering that the Argo is rattling like a leaf in a thunderstorm as two daikaiju battle nearby. I found the character annoying and sort of… pointless, but I admire that bit of bravery.

“Anybody else?” Mark asks, making a face.

Dude. The man just offered to help you and people need that help. Get off your high horse, swallow your pride and just go without comment. God knows how many people your stupid plan just got killed.

The two run to the hangar and a crewman explains the door is jammed. Mark decides to drop a hanging Osprey onto the doors to get them off… without suggesting it to the crewman. He just fucking goes for the buttons, expecting his usual “my plan will work” attitude to succeed.

At last, one of Mark’s harebrained schemes is met with reasonable resistance for the first time and the crewman attempts to wrestle him off, before Mark Is Proven Right Again. But even suggesting it, getting a refusal and then doing it is more heroic than just going for the damn buttons like a lunatic.

He would have looked damn stupid if the weight of the Osprey wasn’t enough to open the doors and it instead just blocked them. The falling aircraft also almost hits the airborne one with its civilian payload as it also wasn’t warned, so again, he took an unnecessary risk that came off lucky because he couldn’t find the time to say “I have an idea”.

To round out the trifecta of what makes me dislike Mark in these scenes is what happens when the rest of the scene plays out:

Gravity Beams spew from Ghidorah’s mouth and blast Rodan into the ocean, defeated. Not satisfied with just this victory, the Golden Demise locks his terrible gaze on the Argo and with a sickening, gleeful cackle, closes in on the plane and its freshly arrived civilians.

All are stunned into a horrified silence. Even Mark, who has been having Unreasonable Protagonist Luck up until this point, bricks it.

“Oh, God.” he pleads.

God answers and he erupts from the ocean.

With a deafening roar, the mighty form of Godzilla slams into King Ghidorah with the force of a collapsing mountain. His dynamic, mid-air leap is enough to drag the foul hydra into the depths of the ocean and Godzilla proceeds to hold him there.

Ghidorah attempts to resurface and fly away, or at least lash out at the Argo in spite, but there Godzilla is again, yanking the head back underwater, biting and rolling like some mountainous crocodile, pinning the alien dragon under his weight.

Unbeknownst to our hero (Godzilla, obviously), the military has deployed the terrible Oxygen Destroyer in an attempt to Destroy All Monsters, giving only a cursory warning to the Argo to get out of there and fast. Mark makes his way onto the bridge and is informed of the decision.

“But he… he just saved us!” says Mark.

No, wait, he didn’t say that. Hold on…

“They… they didn’t even let us get clear?” says Mark.

Uh, no, sorry, trying again.

“Well, it’s not the worst idea.” he says.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCK. YOU.

I get that you’re mad with Godzilla. I get that as the title character with a long history, we root for the kaiju more than anybody else. I get that he took your son from you, but twice… TWICE NOW, he has saved you and the people around you with PERFECTLY TIMED ENTRANCES. Even if it was just a coincidence, I’d be at least slightly more forgiving of the lion that killed my brother by accident if it jumped in front of a tiger that was slaughtering people left and right before it leapt at me.

Twice.

There’s not even a hesitant “oh, but he did help us”. Not even a shocked disbelief that the military has a weapon that they think will kill not just one, but two (because I’m willing to bet he thought Rodan was dead) Titans, much less them firing it without warning right on top of their position. Just a “well, fuck ‘em” shrug.

Godzilla nearly dies, Ghidorah seizes control of the Titans and sets about starting the apocalypse. Finally, Serizawa says what I’ve been thinking for quite a while and says “Well, it looks like you got your wish, Mark.” with a mixture of anger, sadness and disgust.

I could go on; the Titans are rampaging and Mark goes to leave Castle Bravo to strike out on his own and rescue Madison, despite the fact that he knows that Emma will probably try to keep her safe in whatever secure hidey hole she and the Kaiju Cultists have holed up in. In the novel, he’s outright going to steal one (also his first instinct when confronted by an alpha wolf in the novel, is to blow it away with a sidearm, before realising that’s absolutely callous and horrible and tries submissive behaviour tactics instead. So hey, Movie Mark is a slightly better person than Book Mark).

Mark suggests the nuke plan and goes down with Serizawa, Chen and Rick Sanch- Stanton. Everything goes sideways and he doesn’t even fucking blink when Serizawa decides that somebody’s gotta do it manually.

Back aboard the Argo? How does he break the news to Sam, the only member of the MONARCH team that wasn’t there? Shoving Serizawa’s notebook into his chest, saying that they better not screw this up and not even fucking pausing to tell him what happened.

Mark’s self-centred attitude keeps coming back and it gets people killed. My second time viewing this film, during the two confrontation scenes with Godzilla, I wasn’t getting the “There is a massive threat in my territory!” vibe from the King of the Monsters, I was getting a “Who the hell is this asshole and why does he hate me so much?” feeling from Our Glorious Boy.

It’s a recurring theme too. Mark experiences loss, but he feels as if his loss is the only one that matters. Both he and Emma do this to Madison and it makes me mad that in trying to cope with their own loss, they shunned the one remaining child they had left. By the time they realise that, the world is literally about to end and they’re still bickering at one another.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m very vocally critical of Mark and Emma’s treatment of Madison. Both she and Mark decide to put their own ways of coping with their son’s death (constructing a device to allow for the orchestration of mass human death and convincing oneself that it’s the correct course of action/drinking booze) above Madison’s own well being.

When the chips are down, of course, they care for her and ultimately risk their lives to save her, but… congratulations for the bare minimum parenting, guys? Physically, they want her out of harm, but mentally she should either fall into line with Emma’s thinking or be there for Mark.

Godzilla and Mothra feel more like her bloody parents in this film (Godzilla saving her life when she was facing down the literal fucking devil and Mothra’s gentle interaction at the temple and reviving her from death when she appeared to have died in the novel) than the other Russells do. Both fill the archetypes of “Father” (tough, stern, but ultimately your protector) and “Mother” (gentle, nurturing and wonderful) better than the people do.

…yeah, alright, that one is a stretch, but I had that idea a while ago and I wanted to put it to paper.

In short, I’m mad at Sad Mad Dad because his character shoves the waaaaaaaay more interesting, compelling and sympathetic characters of Serizawa, Graham and his own daughter (and the actual goddamned non-monster hero of the movie), Madison out of the way of main character-ness, just so we can have somebody who is about as pleasant to interact with as a cactus.

King of the Monsters is a film that has a lot of sacrifice in it, good and bad. Emma wants to sacrifice most of humanity to save the planet. Serizawa sacrifices himself to save Godzilla and thus, the planet. Mothra sacrifices her own life to save Godzilla from King Ghidorah and so does Emma, to save her family and as redemption for her sins.

Even Madison was also ready to at least risk her own life to distract the Titans and King Ghidorah if it would even slightly disrupt his efforts to conquer the planet. She goes against terrorists, her own mother and a demonic, nigh-omnipotent being of malicious intent and faces him down with a defiant roar of her own when it looks like the end.

But Mark doesn’t sacrifice. He wants his daughter back, but he never takes a hit. Other people die for him, as a result of him and he doesn’t even recognise it. The world is at stake and he keeps his focus on his own desires, ignorant to the people around him because only his loss matters.

He might not be the genocidal monster in the film that Emma was, that Jonah and of course, Ghidorah certainly were. But he has a very narrow and dispassionate world-view and outside of certain cartoons with comedic circumstances, I don’t care much for that at all.

TL;DR: Madison should have been the central protagonist, because I like her more.

[crusherthedoctor]

Sonic Villains: Sweet or Shite? - Part 7: METAL SONIC

It's been a while, but it's time for another Crusher review and analysis.

There are some villains I like. And there are some villains I don't like. But why do I feel about them the way I do? That's where this comes in.

This is a series of mine in which I go into slightly more detail about my thoughts on the villains in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, and why I think they either work well, or fall flat (or somewhere in-between). I'll be giving my stance on their designs, their personalities, and what they had to show for themselves in the game(s) they featured in. Keep in mind that these are just my own personal thoughts. Whether you agree or disagree, feel free to share your own thoughts and opinions! I don't bite. :>

Anyhow, for today's installment, we'll be putting the Stardust Speedway saxophones aside for a moment to discuss Dr. Eggman's notorious robotic copycat, who desperately wants to show us what he's made of: Metal Sonic.

NOTE: While I will be taking several of Metal Sonic's non-game portrayals into account, this will NOT include his Sonic the Comic incarnation, as I feel that Fleetway's Metal - or Metallix, as he's called - is so vastly different in so many ways that I feel there's no point, whereas his other portrayals in non-game media are considerably more consistent for the most part.

The Gist: Being a criminal mastermind slash world conquerer in the making has its shortcomings, and for Dr. Eggman/Dr. Robotnik/The Bad Guy, that shortcoming came in the form of a plush-sized hedgehog who frequently wrecked his machines, foiled his plans, and - worst of all - talked back at him. This literal thorn on his side made the good doctor a very unhappy camper, but one day, his brilliant brain brought a brilliant breakthrough: Why not pit Sonic against himself?

During his then-new scheme to use the Time Stones of the Little Planet to conquer the world through time, Eggman worked tirelessly on his new idea to ensure it was just right. It couldn't be too slow. It couldn't be too bulky. It couldn't be too un-Sonic-like, for he vowed to assert his technological dominance by making a better Sonic than the real one. He wanted this to be his greatest creation yet, and he wasn't going to half-ass that objective.

The result was Metal Sonic, a marvel of industrial automation who established himself as fast as Sonic, as deadly as Sonic, and... not talkative, unlike Sonic. No wonder Eggman declared him the superior of the two.

Eggman loves his creation so much that he’s willing to let him die if this goes wrong. That’s how you know he’s his favourite.

Sure enough, Eggman's efforts were not entirely in vain, as the blue droid was more than a match for Sonic in the speed department, as well as the "What's the best way to make it clear to Amy Rose that I'm not interested?" department via snatching up Sonic's pink hedgehog acquaintance, leaving her as the doctor's captive. Unfortunately however, despite giving Sonic the race of his life, Metal was not yet as quick in his reflexes as the genuine article was, meaning his initial reign of terror came to an abrupt end when he flew head-first into a wall, George of the Jungle-style. Eggman was devastated, except he wasn't, because he knew he could just rebuild and upgrade him. Which he did. Constantly.

He also rebuilt these guys for some reason.

Since his debut in Sonic CD, Metal has went on to appear in a sizable number of games throughout the years, and he's made some personal appearances in a few other continuities as well. Most of these appearances simply have him show up, attack Sonic and other heroes for a bit, then get his ass handed to him. Some of those ass-kickings even came with a tasty amount of hue hues. But every now and then, they'll have him do something more, the most famous example being Sonic Heroes, in which he took over Eggman's army by force and went on his own little crusade to gain everyone's data and become Metal GodJesus, all the while proving himself the real Sonic the Hedgehog... by doing a lot of things the real Sonic the Hedgehog would never do. (This general concept would reappear in the IDW comics, though he did not betray Eggman that time around.)

Overall though, Metal is generally considered to be a welcome face whenever he makes an appearance... when he’s not dreaded for being the biggest roadblock in Fighters.

“Well that’s the end of the playthrough, make sure to like, comment, subscribe.”

The Design: What is there to say about Metal Sonic’s design? It’s cool, it’s ominous, it’s sleek, it’s stylish, and it holds a palpable aura of dangerous badassitude while still fitting perfectly with the design philosophy of this franchise. Truly, Metal’s design alone makes him one of the all-time greats of the Eggman repertoire, and it's easy to see why the scientist is particularly proud of this one.

He’s the robot your robot could crash into a wall like.

He’s had a few transformations over the years though. In Knuckles Chaotix, he turned into a ginormous monstrosity commonly referred to by fans as Metal Sonic Kai, who terrified many juniors back in the day due to making the inexcusable error of not being blue. The bad ending might have also affected them.

E for Everyone.

Luckily, Classic Metal got the right idea two decades later, and kept his blue colour scheme when the Phantom Ruby brought the form back in Sonic Mania Plus. As for Modern Metal, he had a brief life (or lives, if you count IDW) as Neo Metal Sonic, who - despite being made with the intention to be a darker, cooler, more serious iteration of the character - went the complete opposite direction by looking less like a frightening metal monarch, and more like a shonen anime’s midnight seizure.

Look at this fucking thing.

Elf shoes. Ripped skirt. Starfish haircut. Vaguely phallic strap in the appropriate area. Regular Metal may have a semi-cutesy look even in his more dangerous iterations, but at least he doesn't come off as a compensating son who doesn't quite know how to come out to his judgemental father, which is more than I can say for whatever the hell this is supposed to be. Is this really meant to be a more intimidating design? A more badass design...?

Then, as if this wasn’t ridiculous enough for Metal already, they had him transform even further into MechaGodzilla Metal Overlord, a goliath made from the remains of the Egg Fleet, with a side order of spikes and artist’s regret.

"Sonic, I was created for the sole purpose of destroying you... but I can never seem to defeat you... That is why I purchased Freddie Mercury's wardrobe with my own hands!"

Said form also returned in the IDW comic, rechristened Master Overlord, who traded the clawed wings and the flamethrower in exchange for symmetrical hands and a more simplistic body structure, at the expense of looking even more like a children’s toy.

Needless to say, Metal's had some... interesting transformations over the years. But his original look will always remain iconic, and rightly so.

The Personality: Metal Sonic's personality is harder to specify compared to other characters in the series, because his kill-first ask-later demeanour in tandem with his usual muteness means we see him most of the time as little more than a Sonic-shaped extension of Eggman's will. That said however, there have been deeper glimpses here and there into what makes his mechanical mind tick.

The most obvious thing to note is that Metal holds the very un-Sonic trait of not having time for nonsense. Sure, he might not be above taunting his organic counterpart in a likeminded way occasionally, but that aside, he's generally a pretty serious and humorless individual, a stark contrast to his creator and master that nonetheless works in the latter's favor, as the realisation that the goofy manchild Eggman of all people made this thing helps shoot down the myth that the rotund madman is all talk.

"He's behind you!" "Shut it wee man, this is a serious play."

Then there's his insanity, by means of identity crisis. It's not known if this was something that was there from the beginning, or if it's somethng that developed and worsened with each defeat, but at some point in his life, Metal convinced himself that despite literally being made with the intention of exterminating the actual Sonic, he himself was in fact the actual Sonic, and that the actual actual Sonic that already existed prior to his inception was in fact the actual Not-Sonic (or a faker, as would be used to describe a certain other lookalike). This belief has caused him to do a bunch of crazy stuff of dubious logic, and don't try to question him on his reasoning, lest you want him to cut you open like a Terry's Chocolate Orange.

His relationship with Eggman is something of an enigma. While his teenage phase betrayal in Heroes is probably the most mainstream evidence of how he feels about his master, it's easy to forget that this was the exception, not the rule. In nearly every other appearance before and since then, Metal has shown nothing but stone cold loyalty towards the doctor and his cause. Even in IDW, when he regained his Neo form and basically did everything he could to remind everyone that Heroes was a thing that existed, he did it that time around for the purpose of finding his master, and helping to restore his empire. A far cry from Neo's first attempt, when he was ranting and raving about how he should have the empire.

Thus, I can only conclude that while his Sonic-esque AI may cause him to get a little reckless, he remains genuinely devoted to his creator outside of his brief cocaine rush in Heroes... and Free Riders, but I don't think anyone knew what was going on in that one. I don't think he knew what was going on in that one.

But perhaps most surprisingly of all - according to the OVA at least - despite all his black-hearted ways, he is still capable of good, as evidenced when he saved the President and the legendary Old Man Owl from dying a fiery death. Whether it's an inherent part of his own nature, or whether it's a side-effect of his Sonic programming, isn't fully clear... but either way, he might want to make sure Eggman doesn't find out about it.

The Execution: Metal Sonic's execution is a complicated case, because there's a dissonance between when he's merely an obstacle for the good guys, and when they've tried to make him more than that.

When he's merely Eggman's instrument of evildoing, he does the job nicely. Sometimes his appearances can be underwhelming depending on the game (read: Sonic 4), but he usually provides a memorable scuffle when it's time for him to put up his dukes. Even if half of those are actually races.

When he aims for bigger, on the other hand? Well...

I've already joked about Neo Metal Sonic's design, but don't be fooled, for his ridiculous fashion sense is merely one part of my beef with the overall concept of Neo. Simply put, everything about Neo Metal Sonic goes against everything that makes this particular character work.

Ranting, monologuing, and running his mouth off does not work for Metal Sonic.

Gathering everyone's data with the intention of becoming Metal Everyone does not work for Metal Sonic.

Transforming into a goddamn dragon does not work for Metal Sonic. (I can let Metal Sonic Kai slide since despite being bigger and more monstrous, you can still recognise it as Metal Sonic specifically. Colour scheme aside, Metal Overlord/Master Overlord might as well be a random monster entirely.)

These ideas aren't necessarily bad on their own. They could work for another villain, or another Eggman minion. But for Metal Sonic specifically? It just doesn't work at all, and while some may be willing to handwave it as the result of Metal's insanity, I firmly believe it's more than possible to establish and delve into his inner madness in ways that DON'T contradict almost everything about him. A character being insane is not an excuse for turning them into a completely different character altogether, nor is it an excuse for just plain handling them in a shitty manner. By all means, I'm all for giving Metal a bigger role, and I'm all for expanding his character and his dynamic... just not like this.

Metal doesn't need to do all that in order to be effective and leave an impression. His portrayal in the OVA confirms that. OVA Metal was everything that Metal was known for at the time: straightforward, loyal, and silent, bar one line towards the end. And he still managed to be a very intriguing antagonist who served as a believably major threat, and who gave Sonic the fight of his life, and thus earned the hedgehog's disgruntled ire and his begrudging respect. That is the Metal that writers should aspire to. That is the essence of what makes that character.

So, despite everything, I still highly enjoy Metal Sonic when he's Metal Sonic, and not Something Vaguely Shaped Like Metal Sonic. He's stumbled a bit over the years, but when he's done right, he's always an eventful burst of fun, and ultimately, my fondness for those portrayals overrides my disgust towards elf shoes. And I'd love to see them expand on his dynamic with Eggman, which a certain well-liked series of shorts has thankfully given us a small taste of. Here's hoping the future will follow up on it...

“Now, if you may be so generous, hand over the Emerald slowly, or else I'm afraid your little friend will face the consequen-ooooowwwww my FUCKING wrist.”

Crusher Gives Metal Sonic a: Thumbs Up! (and Neo Metal Sonic a: Thumbs Down!)

[aion-rsa]

Preacher: The Most Shocking Moments From the Comics

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There are plenty of differences between the Preacher TV series and the comics, but the commitment to shock value remains the same.

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This article contains major spoilers for the Preacher comics and probably the TV series, too. It's also completely unsuitable for younger or more sensitive readers.

In the world of Preacher, horror is the eleventh commandment.

TV fans are now in on what countless DC Comics and Vertigo fans have known for years, that when it comes to shocking moments, no comic on the planet can hold a candle to Garth Ennis and Steve Dillon’s Preacher. When Preacher began in 1995, from the very first page, it was clear that this was a comic that knew no boundaries, a comic that pushed the envelope on good taste and social taboos while testing the limits of the comic book medium. But make no mistake, underneath those gorgeous Glenn Fabry covers beat a huge heart, because as offensive and nasty as Preacher usually got, the comic book epic also delivered a very human and often moving story of love, hope, and friendship.

But we’re not here to talk about that sappy stuff. We’re here to talk about the exit wounds, flayings, contusions, atrocities, sexual deviancy, depraved rednecks, incest, murders, mayhem, chaos, compound fractures, buggerings, cranial trauma, mass killings, food sex, regular sex, animal sex, fish sex, sheep sex, S&M, and decapitations that Preacher delivered on a regular basis.

Buy Preacher graphic novels on Amazon

An entire church burns to death, and that's just the start.

Ennis and Dillon’s Preacher opens with a church full of parishioners horribly burning to death. In the opening pages, before fans met Cassidy, Tulip, Arseface, the Saint of Killers, Herr Starr, or any of the major players of Vertigo’s magnum opus, they bore witness to Jesse Custer becoming possessed by Genesis, a metaphysical entity with the powers of God. Genesis gives Jesse the power to compel people with his voice (think a way more dashing and less creepy version of Jessica Jones’ Killgrave). And when the powerful entity possesses Custer, the joining kills everyone currently listening to a sermon in Custer’s church.

This moment of horrific blasphemous atrocity set the tone for Preacher, and it was seared into the minds of Vertigo’s faithful. 

TC Buggers a Live Chicken

TC and his pal Jody were Jesse Custer’s childhood tormentors. They worked for Jesse’s evil Grandma Custer and kept order on her sprawling estate. TC was a clearly inbred redneck whose sexual proclivities were just as disturbing as his ghoul like face. TC and Jody made young Jesse’s life miserable as they enforced grandma’s rule with iron handed efficiency, administering beatings to Jesse on the regular.

read more: Why Sandman Was the Essential Horror Comic of the '90s

Things took an even more twisted turn when, one day, TC decided he was going to fuck a live chicken. Yes, Preacher went there. Sadly, Jesse’s best friend witnessed TC choking his chicken and was killed by the enraged poultry violator. This childhood trauma was one of the main reasons Jesse walked his path of righteousness and when Custer ran into Jody and the chicken-violating TC years later, all hell was coming for the animal buggerer and his evil pal.

There’s a Kid Whose Face Looks Like a Puckered Ass

Ah, poor Arseface. Ennis and Dillon introduced a hapless soul who botched a suicide attempt and ended up blowing off most of his face. But he lived, and the results aren't pretty.

read more: How They Create Arseface on TV

Preacher fans will never forget the reveal of the abused boy who would come to be known as Arseface. Dillon really went to town rendering the ruined visage of this poor soul, but despite the most horrific wounds, somehow, the boy’s eyes still shined with a total innocence. The always cheeky Cassidy the vampire dubbed the boy Arseface and the character was mostly played for laughs as the series progressed. Ennis had a blast telling Aresface’s side story as Preacher rolled on. Most of this tale was slide splitting as the poor earnest butt face tried to survive and thrive in a world that would collectively puke at the sight of his poor ruined face. But it was the first reveal of Arseface that balances that perfect blend of horror and humor fans came to expect from Preacher.

Face Off

Early in Preacher’s run, fans were introduced to Si Coltrane, an old pal of Cassidy’s. Cassidy met Coltrane at Woodstock and the two became fast friends. Coltrane became an investigative reporter who, when readers first met him, was on the trail of a serial killer known as the Reaver-Cleaver.

read more: Complete Guide to Preacher Season 4

When Ennis and Dillon first introduced the Reaver-Cleaver, the killer was hard at work on one of his victims. The moment was an instance of absolute terror as readers were forced to witness the Reaver slowly slice off a man’s face and then nail the removed skin mask upside down to the still living victim. It was a masterful splatterpunk moment of pure body atrocity as Preacher proved to fans that it would not pull punches when it comes to a liberal application of gore and violence. 

Jesus DeSade

The character of Jesus DeSade probably epitomizes the Preacher experience. DeSade is an unforgettable character who leads a cult called the Gomorrah People, a group famous for throwing legendary sex parties where nothing is taboo. What starts out as a humorous romp through fetishism and strange eroticism soon takes a truly dark turn.

After Cassidy’s girlfriend overdoses on heroin, the vampire, Custer, and Tulip try to find out who sold the poor girl the drug. Their investigation takes them to one of DeSade’s famed parties and what the trio finds would make the Overlook Hotel blush. The whole building now, not just the weird Nazi bartender and the guy in the teddy bear costume. Every room in DeSade’s crib was brimming with titillation and depravity, from guys buggering sheep, to whippings, floggings, and BDSM of every shape and size.

read more: 30 TV Shows to Watch Now That Game of Thrones is Over

Anyway, everything was erotic and a little strange (well, really strange if you’re the sheep), but nothing horrific. Until Jesse stumbles into a room where De Sade is filming...well, we're not going to spoil it here. But this is where the mastery of Ennis and Dillon comes into play. Just a few panels before this reveal, the book was a laugh a minute parody of eroticism, but in an eye blink, Ennis and Dillon took readers to the darkest of places. What has been a very funny scene got very real, very quickly. It's terrifying stuff.

"Wub"

Poor Herr Starr. Starr is Preacher’s main antagonist, the leader of the Holy Order of the Grail, an ancient religious society meant to keep the blood of Jesus Christ pure (more on that in a bit). Starr is a master strategist and needs Jesse Custer to complete the Order’s domination of the world. Starr pursues Custer all over the US and what begins as a classic tale of good versus evil, ends up an X-Rated Road Runner cartoon for poor, poor Starr.

At one point, Starr is horribly injured and left for dead in a desert. Fortunately for Starr, he is rescued by the Chunt Brothers. Unfortunately for Starr, the Chunt Brothers are a family of inbred cannibals. By the way, inbred villains are kind of a motif in Preacher. The Chunts plan to nurse Starr back to health in order to fry him real nice and have themselves a Herr Starr banquet.

The youngest Chunt, Cyrus, has issues (see what happens after generations of inbreeding?) and keeps uttering “Wub” whenever he sees Starr. One day, Cyrus comes to Starr alone holding a gun and a roll of toilet paper. It turns out “Wub” means “Wipe,” because no one has wubbed Cyrus in a long time. So Starr has to get in there and clean Cyrus’ neglected Sarlaac Pit in order to distract the dirty bottomed young man so Custer’s arch nemesis could grab the gun and free himself.

Now, let’s dissect this. Cyrus is a cannibal with a butt that hasn’t been wubbed in perhaps months. So basically, Starr is forced to wub little bits of human remains from Cyrus’ nether regions. Have fun with this one AMC! wub.

The Descendant of Jesus Christ

Guys, I’m going to try and explain this one without offending anyone, but it’s going to be hard. As I said, the Order of the Grail’s aim was to keep Christ’s bloodline pure, so they inbred the descendants of Jesus so as not to taint the blood of the savior. Well, science tells us what happens when people keep it in the family, and all that happened as the modern day descendant of the son of God liked to pee on things (a lot) while saying things like “Suffer the little children! humperdumper-doo." 

There Was a Villain that Fucked Meat

Smack dab in the middle of Ennis and Dillon’s Preacher run, Jesse Custer ran afoul of a corrupt meat packing industrialist named Odin Quincannon. During Custer’s quest to find God, the upright preacher loses faith and ends up in the small down of Salvation, Texas. Salvation is, in Ennis’ words, “the kind of place you ain't left by the time you're twenty-five, you're stuck."

It was in this atmosphere of hopelessness that gave rise to Odin Quincannon, a cruel, corrupt, hateful billionaire that ran Salvation with an iron fist. Odin was a creepy little man that allowed his meat packers to run rampant on Salvation, raping, pillaging and murdering whenever they felt the urge. Jesse took up the badge and became sheriff of Salvation and opposed Odin. Odin tried to kill Custer by sending the KKK after Custer, but our preacher stood tall and a titanic struggle for the soul of Salvation began.

Now, all that is riveting, but where does the disturbing come in? Well, I’m about to tell you and if you had plans to go to a steak house or deli today, you might want to start considering some vegetarian alternatives.

Odin would frequently go into his shed to relax. From there, readers would hear Odin saying things like “Spread the cheese” and other disturbing utterances. When all Hell came a callin’ for Odin, Custer found the man in his shed making love to a woman...made of meat. She had big turkey breasts, and a giant ham head, and sausage fingers and yeah, Odin Quincannon was screwing a meat woman.

The image was Steve Dillon’s most twisted visual in his entire run on Preacher. The page is haunting as a drooling, pathetic Odin Quincannon finds one last moment of solace by inserting his pecker into a woman made of meat. Pot roast pounding, veal-sturbation, turkey tumbling, ground beef insertion, sausage fondling, steak humping, pork porking...

The Saint of Killers

OK, imagine Lee Marvin, Clint Eastwood and WWE’s Undertaker coalesced into a Voltron-like murder machine and you have the Saint of Killers. The Saint was once a frontiersman and former soldier who happily lived off the land with his family. When his beloved kin were felled by a fever, the future Saint went to get them the medicine they needed to survive. The soldier’s quest was fraught with peril and he was delayed. When he returned home, he found that it wasn’t the fever that killed his family; it was a group of roaming bandits. Swearing vengeance, the soldier gunned down all the bandits save the leader. The lead owlhoot grabbed a young girl as a hostage and the future Saint, so filled with vengeance, shot her through the head. His gun jammed and the bandit killed the soldier, leaving his vengeance incomplete.

The soldier may have died that day, but the Saint of Killers was born. He went down to Hell, but the killing didn’t stop. He gunned down every demon and devil he saw. The Saint was sent to heaven, but the killing still didn’t stop, he gunned down every angel he saw. The afterlife sent him to Earth and made the soldier the Patron Saint of All Killers. And the killing didn’t stop.

This brings the Saint into Jesse Custer’s story. The Saint is charged with tracking Custer and...well. It leads to a moment that is the essence of the sheer blasphemous gall of Preacher, a series where not even the Almighty is safe from a vengeance driven cowboy.

Read and download the Den of Geek SDCC 2019 Special Edition Magazine right here!

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Feature

TV

Marc Buxton

Aug 6, 2019

Preacher

AMC

from Books https://ift.tt/2Tc5hWu

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 116: Prison Chat

Previously on BnHA: We took a break from the U.A. kids and their provisional license exam antics and got a whole chapter from Twice’s point of view. He has a fucked up backstory which involves him cloning himself and then his clones all battling for dominance and murdering each other, and now it’s just him left and he’s not even sure if he’s the original. We also learned that Endeavor is not exactly winning people over as the new number one hero, and most people are either underwhelmed or openly creeped out by him. Meanwhile, emboldened villains feel increasingly comfortable committing petty crimes in broad daylight and teaming up now that All Might isn’t around. A new group of villains lead by a dude named Overhaul committed some light dismemberment and arson, and it looks like Twice is thinking about recruiting them to the League. Finally, we cut to a max security prison where All Might is apparently meeting with the imprisoned All for One to “settle things” omgggggggg.

Today on BnHA: All Might asks All for One about Tomura and about what he was planning. All for One is predictably unhelpful and says that Tomura is working on his own now. They have an admittedly fascinating discussion about why All for One decided to groom a successor after being injured by All Might. AFO then expertly provokes All Might by speculating about the chaotic state of the outside world with startling and annoying accuracy. He taunts All Might about being frustrated and powerless. All Might says he knows that AFO was planning to have Tomura kill both him and Deku. He says he won’t let that happen, and that no matter how many evil schemes AFO hatches, he will always be there to crush them. Back at the fanfic dorms, the kids of 1-A wind down as they excitedly await the start of the new semester. Bakugou comes up to Deku and tells him to meet him outside later and that “it’s about your quirk.”

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 151 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.

**There are spoilers in this recap for chapter 131, which has not yet aired in the anime.** These spoilers are tagged as always, but take heed.)

BAKUGOUUUUUUU

“the noble beast of class 1-A” lol wtf

“Tartarus Greeting” isn’t that like the Greek hell

WE ONLY HAVE THREE MORE CHAPTERS LEFT IN THIS VOLUME FOR THIS BRAT TO GO CONFRONT DEKU ABOUT HIS QUIRK. GET A MOVE ON ALREADY BOY

but of course we’re opening right where we left off first. the prison with All Might and All for One. which I’m also pretty hyped for, so

All for One is complaining about the high level of security in this high security prison

apparently they’re monitoring his vitals, brain waves, etc. at all times, and if you so much as wiggle in your chair the wrong way, all the gun turrets in the place will point at you

still think he could escape in an instant if he wanted to. he probably has a bulletproof quirk. and we know he has a fucking warp quirk. he’s just biding his time

oh, apparently Tartarus is the name of the prison. also the prison is underground. or at least his part of it is underground. cuz it didn’t seem to be underground when we cut to the exterior of the building just a couple of panels ago

is there any wood around, All Might. you should probably knock on some wood. fucking jinxed us all, dude

All for One’s only response is “let’s assume that to be the case.” fffff lol yeah okay

so he’s asking what does All Might want with him, where’s Gran Torino, why did All Might come alone, “what’s with that pitiful costume” -- and okay, with that last one though, so are you actually fucking blind or not. I know he doesn’t have eyes and he’s been using infrared and the like, but his scathing remarks about All Might’s appearance are always so on point and it’s like ???

(ETA: goddammit I wish I could just project this thought into Horikoshi’s mind. like he suddenly wakes up in a cold sweat and is all “THE PLOT HOLE. OMG. I FORGOT” and immediately goes to write one of his infamous bonus page ramblings to correct it. I mean, it’s an easy enough fix. he can make up some bullshit quirk to explain it easily enough. but just. it really bothers me for some reason, like way more than it should. fuck you, All for One)

All Might really fucking hates All for One you guys. not gonna lie, pissed off is a good look for him

now he’s asking where Tomura is

All for One says he doesn’t know. “unlike you, I’ve already let my successor carry on”

now All Might’s asking him what he was trying to do. “what were you after?”

okay but now that the immortality thing has been brought up, it reminds me that I’ve been wondering why would this basically immortal guy suddenly become so obsessed with molding a successor? to the extent where he said that everything he’d been doing was for Tomura’s sake. (although whether or not that’s true is a whole nother story)

All for One says it’s pointless to explain it because All Might would never be able to understand

and now he’s saying that he and All Might are the same. two sides of the same coin type of thing. “in the same way you aspired to be the hero of justice, I yearned to be the king of evil”

when he says “live on eternally”, he’s talking about his legacy living on through Tomura, then? cuz idk, I still don’t buy it

and now All Might is also asking him “if that’s the case, why a successor?”

ah, he says it’s because of the injury All Might inflicted on him

I really love the way the reflection is dividing this image between All Might and All for One’s faces. oh damn

and all right, I guess I can buy this explanation. but I still can’t see Tomura as having those final villain chops though. idk, I wouldn’t be surprised if All for One changes his mind, or manages to acquire a better healing quirk than his current one -- one which actually allows him to restore himself to his former glory -- and then he decides he wanted to carry on with the whole villain thing after all

someone over the speaker is telling All Might he only has three more minutes

and now All for One is like OH SHIT and he’s trying to think of all the other shit he wanted to say to him lol

he’s asking how the world is out there now that All Might’s retired

it’s like Order of the Phoenix, but not quite Half-Blood Prince, fyi

dude on the loudspeakers is warning All Might not to give him any info

All for One says “what a shame”

and now it looks like he’s going to speculate. and probably be bang on target too

did you actually read the previous chapter yourself somehow or what

I wish All Might would stop gritting his teeth and clenching his fist and sweating in this way that just confirms every damn thing that All for One is saying

ffffff he must be so frustrated though. he devoted his entire life to making a peaceful world and to see that all fall apart and to be helpless to do anything about it...

and of course All for One is making the exact same observation. :/ “I believe you will spend the rest of your life stricken by your powerlessness and inability to do anything”

fucking hell, can’t we just have one of these turrets suddenly tragically “malfunction” and end this dude already. someone please tell me why we’re keeping him alive. clearly he’s no good for information

he’s asking All Might how it feels

All Might, the best thing you could do right now would be to just stand up and walk out of the room. you’re not getting anything else out of him and right now he’s getting under your skin, and seeing you hurting over this is giving this fucker exactly what he wants

the loudspeaker voice is also telling All Might to back away

I feel like he’s talking to me more than to All Might. about the “no hitting” part. yes that is indeed a shame

ooh, All Might’s gonna fire something back at him! GO TOSHI GO

he’s telling him not to presume that he knows everything. and he says he understands All for One’s thinking very well

oh shit

okay so like. I really like when older mentor type characters mention their proteges like this and they’re like “that boy” or “that child” and it’s like a reminder of how young and vulnerable and inexperienced the protege character is still, and how the mentor character is always looking out for them. like. I just like that. maybe it’s that it makes me feel like I can bond with the mentor character over our mutual protectiveness of the kid

anyway. so All for One isn’t even denying it; he’s just like, “and?”

and All Might is just like

dang. although once again I really wish that there was some wood nearby for you to knock on fffffffffffff

(ETA: ****SPOILER WARNING FOR CHAPTER 131, WHICH HAS NOT YET AIRED IN THE ANIME****

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so not only is All Might saying “fuck you” to All for One here, but he’s also giving the middle finger to fate itself. and I have to admit, it’s incredibly badass, even if it also makes me more worried than ever about him jinxing it. you see, that’s the upside of sticking around to raise your successor, AFO. you get to be inspired by them in some unexpected ways.

also, All Might is very brave and very determined and I love him so much omg.

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****END SPOILERS****)

and now the loudspeaker guy is telling All Might his time is up

All Might says that whatever future AFO is envisioning, All Might will always smash it no matter what, and AFO can spend the rest of his life sitting here and looking on

yeah bro. way to get the last fucking word in

now the doors are closing on All for One, and he’s laughing because of course he is

oh fuck you, dude. this conversation has been amazing but I’m tired of you now lol

now we’re cutting to All Might riding home with his best bro Nao

Nao’s asking how it went and All Might’s like, yeah, it didn’t

!! he’s mentioning that he also talked with Stain?!

(ETA: Mangastream’s translation made it sound like he spoke with him, but Viz and Fallen Angels's versions said that he was making plans to question him but hadn’t actually done so yet. given that this hasn’t come up again yet -- at least not at the point where I’m currently at -- I’m guessing Viz and FA got it right. though I’m still curious as to what they actually want to talk to him about.)

but now he’s getting interrupted by his phone which is buzzing

AHHHHH HE GOT DEKU’S WHOLESOME TEXT

All Might please charge your phone soon

HE EVEN HAS DEKU LISTED IN HIS CONTACTS AS “MIDORIYA-SHOUNEN” LMAO

HIS DAD FACE AT THE END OMG. HE REALLY NEEDED THIS RIGHT NOW

also it completely slipped my mind earlier, but he finally has his arm out of that cast. and apparently the hand is doing pretty well since he’s using it to text. good good

AHHHHH FINALLY WE’RE BACK AT THE U.A. DORMS

the kids are hanging out in the common area. Deku’s wondering if All Might got his text yet. he has this super cute proud little smile on his face

I’m so happy for him

but I won’t pretend I’m not also preoccupied with how Bakugou is doing lol. like, he wasn’t one to hang out with the others much even before this, and now it’s probably going to be even less so, at least until their excitement at having all passed the exam dies down. I expect Shouto will be keeping to himself a little bit more for a while too

gasppppppppppp

[FRANTICALLY CHECKING OWN PULSE BECAUSE I’M PRETTY SURE MY HEART JUST STOPPED]

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDD

(((o(꒪ □ ꒪ )o)))

I’M FREAKING THE FUCK OUTTTTTTTTTTTT AHHHHHHHHHHH

 BONUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU GUYS!!!!!!!! HOW AM I EVEN SO EXCITED WHEN I FUCKING KNEW THIS WAS COMING?!?!?! I DON’T EVEN KNOW!!!!!

THE BONUS PAGE IS JUST KACCHAN AND HIS SQUAD ALONG WITH TETSUTETSU AND MONOMA FROM CLASS B FOR SOME REASON

ALSO THE GUY WHO WROTE THE VIGILANTES SPIN-OFF THINKS THAT TSUYU HAD A LIL TADPOLE TAIL UNTIL KINDERGARTEN!

IT SAYS “NOTE: NOT CANON” BUT IT’S MY FUCKING CANON NOW DUDE

“AND I LIKE TSUYU” I FUCKING LIKE HER TOO OMG

BAKUGOU!!!! AND DEKU!!!! OUTSIDE!!!!!!!!!!! TALKING. ABOUT. QUIRKS

someone help me, I’m pretty sure if my apartment were to fucking catch fire right at this moment I’d still be reading and just ignoring it omggggg