#he probably won’t sleep naked with you unless y’all fuck or anything

[134340am]

🦀 + izuku !! it is cancer szn after all <333

nsfw ahead —

realises how good it feels to sleep naked after he moves out. he keeps his clothes on when you start sleeping over, though — he doesn’t wanna spook you or anything, or have you think he’s trying to imply something…

but once you get comfortable and he gets comfortable, his shirt is coming off. then his underwear, leaving him in just a pair of soft cotton sleep shorts that show off the outline of his bulge through the thin fabric.

it’s a pleasant sight to wake up to in the morning — his arms thrown over his head and biceps bulging, pecs on full display, and his morning wood tenting against his shorts :-)

send me an emoji + a character for a random headcanon!

[buckysmischief]

running in the dark - 2

Bucky Barnes x reader

Alex Summers x reader

Word Count: 2,224

Warning(s): language, drinking & smoking

Masterlist | Series Masterlist | Playlist

“Good morning, gorgeous.” The smell of pancakes and syrup filled your senses, pulling you out of a deep sleep.

Without opening your eyes you eventually spoke up, “Pancakes and pet names won’t fix anything, Alex. How’d you get in anyway?”

“Wanda slammed the door in my face-”

“-as she should.”

“-so I climbed in through the window.” He confessed.”And I’m not sure there is a way to make up for my actions last night, but I overreacted and I’m sorry. There’s no excuse, I’m just a dumbass.”

In all the time you’ve known Alex, he’s hardly apologized, but in no way did that mean he was sincere. “Look you can say whatever you want but actions mean more to me. Be the boyfriend I deserve or just leave. I’m too tired to keep fighting for something you don’t seem to take seriously at all.”

He’s never been the best boyfriend, but he definitely wasn’t the worst - not that that’s saying much. If he wasn’t willing to put in the work, though, then you could live without him.

“I’ll be better, for us. I promise.” You could tell by the look on his face he meant it, or at least wanted to, even his tone was different than the other times.

“Okay, but you really gotta show me this time, and give me those pancakes before I accidentally push you off the bed.”

After you stuffed your face, you let him cuddle with you. It could have been your full stomach, or being wrapped up in your boyfriend, but eventually you fell back asleep.

This was the side of Alex that you wish everyone else could see, the side where he was soft, gentle, and caring. Of course you didn’t want everyone knowing first hand just how comfortable his embrace felt, that was just for you.

You had known him since high school but were never in the same circles, your paths never even crossed unless you were in detention at the same time. God forbid anyone tried to talk in there though, the teacher was a bitch and would add days just because she could. It wasn’t until a few years ago that you met him and started dating.

Well, you ran into each other at a club, talked for a few hours, and ended up half naked in his bed the next morning. Things were very casual in the beginning, well as casual as exclusive fuck buddies could be. About a year and a half ago you both decided to make things official. That’s when things started getting rocky.

He became more jealous, a lot worse than he was the night before, that was something he needed to work on again. A part of you really wanted this to work out, you’d definitely needed to convince your friends to give him another chance but that was for another day.

Much sooner than you would have liked, Alex was pulling you out of your sleep, “Hey princess, you gotta get up. Wanda’s been blowing up your phone.”

“Ugh, I must be late.” you groaned and rolled out of bed, throwing on a pair of leggings and an on band tee.

“For what? I thought you were off today?”

“You remember Leslie, Pietro’s girlfriend? She’s moving in today, and so is Bucky I guess. I told them I’d help unpack and stuff.” You were lowkey expecting him to freak out, but he looked absolutely calm.

“I know I’m probably not welcome, but I can help if y’all need it.” He knew if he was ever going to make it work with you, he needed to have a better relationship with your friends. He’s trying.

“As much as I’d love that,” you say, giving him a kiss, “I think it would be better to plan something ahead of time.”

“We can go to Topgolf, maybe a cookout on the beach?” A part of you was almost suspicious at how different he was acting, you made a mental note to talk to him about it later.

“A cookout would probably be best,” another ding came from your phone, Wanda was outside waiting. “Come on, you can come back over later if you want.”

He stopped you before reaching the front door, pulling you into a kiss with enough passion to leave you breathless and weak in the knees. “Text me when you get home, I love you.”

“I love you too, have a good day babe.”

You could feel Wanda’s eyes on you from the car, silently judging you. “I’m not going to tell you what I’m thinking.” She said, pulling out the driveway.

“Small blessings.” You laughed.

“BUT, that’s because I’ve said it 100 times and I don’t feel like wasting my breath anymore.” She was thinking you were an idiot who deserves better and blah blah blah, and she’s right, but you learned a long time ago that if you couldn’t get over this crush for Bucky then you’d spend the rest of your life settling for anyone who wasn’t him.

That didn’t mean your feelings for Alex were fake or anything - they’re real - they just didn’t compare to how Bucky had made you feel almost your whole life. It didn’t help that all of those feelings came back the second you saw him standing in your living room.

“So how long is Bucky staying with P?”

“Until he finds a place nearby,” she replied, not mentioning the subject change, “he didn’t really have much though so we're really just helping Leslie.”

“So what you’re saying is the boys are going to do all the heavy lifting while the three of us just organize it all?”

“Exactly.”

As Wanda parked next to the curb you could see the boys unloading the U-Haul while Leslie directed them safely in the house.

Her and Pietro have been together for awhile now, no one knows how long exactly because they’re assholes and won’t tell. They said they’ll reveal it on their wedding day, but everyone knows neither of them are the marrying type. You know what kind of people treat their friends and family that way? People that belong together apparently.

“Thank God you’re finally here!” Leslie shouted as she ran from the front patio to hug them both. “What held you up?”

“Someone had an early moring visitor.” Wanda’s voice didn’t show a hint of irritation, but her mean sideeye did.

“Someone’s just mad no one climbed through their window and brought them breakfast.” Truth be told, that comment was kind of mean. Sam, Wanda’s boyfriend, was currently stationed on the other side of the country and she didn’t get to see him a lot. And yes, if he was here she probably would have gotten an entire breakfast platter made for her. But just because you understand her dislike of Alex doesn’t that mean she has to remind you in subtle ways whenever she feels like it.

“Speaking of food,” Pietro interrupts, “is it almost lunchtime? I’m starving.”

“Who are you, Scooby-Doo? You just ate 30 minutes ago.” Leslie laughs.

“I’ll pickup some wings and pizza,” you offer, walking inside the house, “Where’s Bucky? He’s coming with me.”

“Is he?”

“He owes me eight years, he doesn’t have a choice.”

You eventually found him in the back yard, sitting in the sand. “Am I interrupting anything?”

“Never,” he smiled, “you can sit next to me you know. I don’t bite.”

“Eight year old me would beg to differ, but I’m good. About to pick up some food, wanna come with?”

“I don’t have a choice, do I?”

“Nope, come on.”

Wanda called in the order to the pizza place near the boardwalk, so by the time Bucky pulled up there shouldn’t be a long wait. You decided to walk to the ABC store across the street and grab a few bottles of rum and vodka. If they thought there wasn’t going to be some kind of special housewarming party, they were wrong.

Once you got back to the car, Bucky was walking out with three boxes of pizza and three boxes of wings, “I would have asked you if you needed help but I wanted to see if those muscles were just for show.”

“You got the essentials so I’ll let it pass.” He wouldn’t have made you carry anything anyways, not because he was that nice, he just knew you’d drop at least two boxes.

“Oh, the essentials? Those are getting dropped off later.”

“You’re a mess.” He knew exactly what you were referring to and left it alone at that.

When you both got back to Pietro’s, more of Leslie’s things were inside and ready to be put away, but that could wait until after lunch… and maybe a few drinks.

As the day went on, the five of you successfully got everything organized and as a reward to yourselves, you were going to have a bonfire on the beach. A part of you wanted to invite Alex, but you’d see him later. Right now was about hanging out with your friends - and catching up with Bucky.

Pietro brought out two sheets to sit on while Bucky got the fire started, Wanda and Leslie got the drinks and you grabbed some snacks.

And the weed.

“I bought enough to share!” You shook the jar, letting everyone know if they wanted it then they could take it.

Wanda laughed out, “You know Pietro will.”

“That’s because he’s the only one with good taste.” You winked to Leslie.

It immediately - and rightfully - went to her head, “Isn’t that the truth.”

When the sheets were laid out, Wanda, Leslie and Pietro sat on the bigger one with you and Bucky on the slightly smaller one.

At one point in the evening, you tuned the others out and gave your full attention to Bucky. He was filling you in on all the things he didn’t know you already knew thanks to Pietro not knowing how to keep his mouth shut. The only thing you didn’t know was why exactly he pushed you away, just that it had something to do with his ex. Why not find out now?

“So, why didn’t Natasha like me?” It was better to just come right out and ask, no point in holding back now.

Bucky knew he couldn’t tell you the whole truth, but he wasn’t going to lie either. “Nat was - is, definitely still is crazy. I think it was your third break up with Beck, you called in the middle of the night crying and she freaked out after. Said you were “disrespecting” her and a bunch of other ridiculous things.”

“If you knew they were ridiculous then why did it work?” You asked softly, not wanting the others to overhear.

He wanted to tell you that it worked because it seemed like his only escape from you, that maybe a clean break from you was what he needed to really get over you for good. But here he was, all these years later and still hopelessly in love with you.

Again, he chose to tell you half of the truth. “She told me she was pregnant, but I found out she was lying four months later. First thing I wanted to do was call you and apologize, maybe cry a bit, but I was too embarrassed that I did what I did to you..”

“Buck..”

“No, please don’t. I shouldn’t have just cut you out, you didn’t deserve that.”

There wasn’t really anything to say to that, there wasn’t anything you wanted to say to that. Knowing didn’t make you feel better like you thought it would, truth be told it made you feel worse for reasons you couldn’t even admit to yourself. Instead you hit the blunt and silently offered it to him, slightly shocked when he took it.

On the other side of the fire, the twins were wrapped up in their own conversation while Leslie was silently watching you and Bucky through the flames.

“Hey guys,” she whispered to the twins, “did Yn and Bucky ever date?”

“Ew, gross.”

“No, why?”

If a stranger were to walk past and see the way you two were looking at each other, they would probably think you are dating. “Are you both blind? Actually, that’s offensive to the  blind, even they would know what I’m talking about.”

Pietro looked over to see you both laughing and other than you sitting a little close to Bucky, he didn’t see what his girlfriend was talking about, but Wanda did.

Around nine you texted Alex for a ride since everyone was too drunk to drive, Wanda chose to just sleep on her brother's couch instead. Once you were in his car he put your seatbelt on for you, “Someone’s in a good mood.”

“I just missed you.”

“Can I spend the night? I missed you too.” You said, trying to get as close to him as you could.

“Anything you want baby.” He was keeping his eyes on the road, but you didn’t miss the smile on his face.

“Then can we go to Cookout? I’d kill for a milkshake.”

“Already headed in that direction.” It wasn’t a guarantee he was going to change in the long run, but right now he was putting in effort and that’s all that mattered.

perm tags (46/50): @stuckonjbbarnes​ @valkyriesryde​ @hopesbarnes​ @superavengerpotterstar​ @estillion14​ @sleepingspacedragon​ @geeksareunique​ @imsoft-barnes​ @murdermornings​ @distractedgemini​ @screaming-fridge​ @readeity​ @whatinthyworld​ @my-drowning-in-time​ @buggy-blogs​ @hey-its-grey​ @pinknerdpanda​ @brokenthelovely​ @theannoyingnightmarecollector​ @death-unbecomes-you​ @rhymesmenagerie​ @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​ @https-bucky​ @also-fangirlinsweden​ @goalexis123​ @missmeganrachel​ @sunflowersandcherry​ @miraclesoflove​ @matsumama​ @reann-loves-sebstan​ @thinkoutsidethebex​ @thefridgeismybestie​ @niall2017​ @maddope​ @imagine-all-the-imagines​ @thummbelina​ @m3ga1nsp1r3d​ @romaniansweetheart​ @thebadassbitchqueen​ @king-sebb​ @nerdy-bookworm-1998​ @bonkyboinkybucky​ @slaytherinthoughts​ @kingkassam​ @anti-the-glitch-bitch​ @poppunkdork​

series tags (2/25): @rebekahdawkins​ @writerwrites​

[msbelmonttepesbelnades]

A/n: Trevor is my favorite... so enjoy ;) Also as I’m writing and looking at the other a-z I’ve written. I can see I missed a few letters in some of them lmao.

Trevor

Aftercare

Trevor is a tad bit indolent with his aftercare. He likes to lay there with his partner, usually behind them or on his side. Just so he can plant soft kisses on your back and shoulders. He’s one to wrap his arms around you and hold you close to his broad chest.

Body Part

For himself, I can see Trevor liking his hands and forearms. His hands are strong and warm, they’re what keep you safe from harm. He also knows he has an angular jaw. He likes when you trace your fingers along his chin and jawline.

On his s/o, Trevor can’t seem to choose because he likes everything. Relishing the fact that he has you naked and in his hands. But, I suppose if he had to pick it would be your thighs. He loves to squeeze them, bite them and lay his head in your lap. His stubble tickles when he’s in between them.

Cum

It’s very thick and hard to swallow at first, it’s not very sticky but don’t let it dry cause it’ll be a bitch to try and get out later. Fucking cements over lmao. Despite that it surprisingly tastes great and it isn’t very salty. He says it the beer and ale he drinks that makes it tastes so...intoxicating.

Dirty Secret

In his younger days whilst traveling around, he would often drink himself into a coma just to get to sleep at night. He does it less now that he has the company of Sypha. But one night while staying in an inn he saw this servant girl working down in the tavern. As the night went on, Trevor would catch her stealing suggestive glances his way. Trevor tried to ignore it but he couldn’t, it had been ages since his last lay and he was definitely aching for the touch of a woman. So, that night he invited her to his room. He had every intent on fucking her filthy but...didn’t? Or rather he couldn’t, not the way he intended. She had brought him a complimentary tankard of ale. She drugged him, tied him up to the bed post and had her way with him. In the midst of the haze that was inflicted on him he could see through cloudy vision that she was robbing him. She took everything. The next morning he woke up still tied down and with an intense headache. He had to call for help, it was extremely embarrassing and when he was asked what happened he didn’t say. It’s a dirty little secret he’s taking to the grave. He actually saw the girl again but didn’t have the heart to go confront her about it.

Experience

He’s got it under his belt, he’s not a horn dog but he’s slept around enough to know what he’s doing. How to do it right, how to do it even better. As well as knowing what he likes and what turns him on. Surely there will never be disappointment when sleeping with Trevor. Unless he’s completely wasted.

Favorite Position

Kneeling missionary, he likes hovering over you. Your back on the ground while he’s thrusting into you at an angle that’s extremely difficult to not let drive you mad. He likes looking at your face, he likes seeing your chest heave and your lips parted. It makes him hard and his thrusts harder. He also likes it when you’re on top riding him, he likes it playful and a bit rough so do whatever you want to him.

Goofy

It’s not overly silly with him but you can’t have sex with Trevor and not laugh. He likes to joke about how flustered he makes his you. This man is so much fun, but when the night calls for passion. He makes you giggle a little less and moan and whimper a lot more.

Hair

He’s mildly hairy at best. He’s got a happy trail but surprisingly very little chest hair. I’m not gonna lie you might catch a pube going down on him lmao. Which will make him actually trim, but very little. He likes having quite a bit of hair down there.

Intimacy

He can be very intimate, it won’t ever be awkward with him. He makes sure you’re comfortable and let you know that he adores you when his words aren’t enough. Trevor is likely very sensual too, so it’s not always about an orgasm with him.

Jack-Off

He does it, not very often he’s usually good at holding it off while he’s traveling. It doesn’t resonate when he has to climb through shit pipes and fight drunks at taverns who have a personal vendetta against his family. But, when he’s finally relaxed and not dealing with any imminent stress or danger it sets in. He can’t ignore it once he starts think about it and it tends to help him feel better.

Kink

Trevor likes bondage, has an oral fixation when it comes to his partner. He loves their lips and mouth. Suck/lick on his fingers playfully or do the same to yours and he’ll just stare. He doesn’t fancy hurting his partner but he will choke playfully. He also likes to Roleplay, I could see him being into fucking you dressed up as a nun. His dirty talk is better than anyone else’s too, it’s probably bc he swears a lot.

Location

Back of the wagon, anywhere you’ll be covered and undisturbed. He doesn’t mind getting caught but he doesn’t want to have a too high risk of it happening. Mainly because he wants to finish what he’s started with you and because he likes being thorough with his fucking. He doesn’t care if people hear though lmao.

Motivation

When he’s relaxed and is able to let his guard down without any fear of something crazy or outlandish happening he will fuck as much as you want and may even ask for it on his own. His libido is medium to high depending on the day. During the winter it’s much higher for some reason? Maybe it’s the need to keep a regular body temperature.

No

Nothing insanely public, he won’t do anything they involves a risk of life endangerment. Like fucking in the middle of the night outside in the forest where night creatures run amuck. Sex is supposed to be fun, adventurous and experimental. No excess adrenaline pls, be gets enough of that already. Other than that he’ll probably do whatever you ask for.

Oral

A receiver however he can give, he’s good if he’s walked through it; a bit messy but still decent. He can definitely make your toes curl a few times if he’s really into it. But, nothing beats him seeing his your lips wrapped around his dick. It’s thick too, so if you can take the whole thing then he’ll blank out. He loves how it makes him weak in the knees and writhe a bit when he’s sitting. Trevor will gladly face fuck you. If you swallow he’ll do anything you want I swear lmao.

Pace

Given Trevor’s size, he has to go slow. He doesn’t want to hurt you, he wants to make you feel good. His pace quickens the more adjusted you become. His thrusts are deep and extremely filling, there’s no part of you that will be left untouched and stretched out.

Quickie

Yeah he’s down, definitely down to fuck. All you need to do in those small moments of relaxation and peace that you both share together while on the road traveling, is to ask. He’s down to have you to himself during these moments and they’re surprisingly sensual and intimate.

Risk

Not into it, I mean he might fuck in risky places but he definitely prefers not to. He’s always on edge and needs to relax and if he wants to really enjoy the time he has with you, he wants to do it risk free.

Stamina

If he rushes, two-three rounds with a 10 minute refractory period. If he takes his time, about 4-6 rounds and that is not counting when the sun comes up. One round lasts between 35 minutes to two hours with him, maybe three if y’all are getting kinky.

Toy

I don’t believe he owns any ‘toys’ with the exception of his whip. He won’t hit you with it lmao but he will tie you up with it.

X-Ray

He’s got girth, 4in inches thick he’s a bit above average in length aground 7.5in maybe 8in. He as a prominent vein going up the underside of his shaft to the base of his head. It would be wise to listen to him when he says take your time.

Yearning

His yearning is about average, possibly above average with his s/o constantly around. The Belmont has an unbelievable amount of self control, except when he’s drunk lmao.

Zzz

He has trouble sleeping when he’s alone but, after the act and when he’s with you cuddled up in bed he’ll KO and will happily sleep through the night. Though there are times when he’ll wake up during the night and his movements will stir you. Just hold him close and tell him it’ll be okay and he’ll go back to sleep!

[og-danny-dorito]

Hancock SFW Headcanons To Satiate My Undying Thirst for This Raisin

this is dedicated to all of my 12 year old monster/humanoid obsessions, and to the ones which may follow such as this mans, John Hancock, the mayor of Goodneighbor. because I'll be damned if I see a ghoul and don't become immediately attracted to them. also these weren't requested, but @thatwolfnamednyla​ seemed interested so i'll tag them (i can remove the tag too if you want me to, just let me know).

<---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->

S F W :

- ok so, I’m gonna start off with physical headcanons because it’s easier for me to base everything off of that 

- since most of the heights in the game are the same and they don’t really give any actual canon heights for them, I’d say that he’s about 5”5 because I love the imagine of a short man with a knife. like-

- yeah he’s definitely powerful and strong willed and mental the opposite of a short baby man, but like can you just imagine some dude walking up to you and having to look up at you because he’s small? Especially a high af ghoul man small boy? an artistic virtue

- that, and he’s generally the most crackhead out of all the companions 

- like he’s the guy to go to if you’re itching to bust out some chems and go shoot at random shit in the middle of the night cause he’s just that kinda dude 

- he lives for the thrill of things, and so obviously someone equally as crackhead as he is would fit him perfectly, but for the sake of actual relationship building I’d say that he’s better fit with a rational crackhead 

- like yeah, going out and getting yourself fucked up is great, but like not to the point of getting yourself so fucked up beyond repair, yknow? someone who takes a second and a half to think his crazy ass ideas through and THEN do it with him is the best person for the job as his metaphorical babysitter 

- and he really likes to be taken care of because he’s a sucker for that shit. I would say that he has a daddy/mommy kink but like these aren’t nsfw and so I’m not gonna bust out that nasty shit just yet 

- that said, being his partner doesn’t have very specific guidelines. being pansexual AND polyamorous allows him to love freely as he was genetically destined to anyway 

- seriously, he’s attracted to you if you say something nice to him and show a little bit of interest that’s just how it is. he doesnt really think of appearances unless he's only out for dick

- he doesn’t really have a specific type either??? but he finds timid and nervous people so fucking cute. like,,, if you keep apologizing because of small things he’ll ruffle your hair and start calling you ‘kid’ and ‘sweetie’ cause honestly it’s just so sweet to see you get all nervous and shy 

- it literally makes him want to fistfight someone in an abandoned parking lot for you and he can't help his protectionist ways

- like he likes to be taken care of yeah, but he ends up setting y’all in the ‘give some get some’ scenario where it’s more of a partnership 

- jokingly calls you ‘smoothskin’ even if your skin isn’t smooth like you’re scarred or something. it cracks him up because he does it in a smoker voice too but he already sounds like a smoker so he ends up coughing a little bit after in between laughs 

- biggest goofball on the planet 

- will literally play pranks on you because he finds it funny, like using makeshift pre-war whoopee cushion and shit like that. will also 100% love it if you prank him back. he doesn’t take much seriously and so any form of mild joking makes him genuinely happy 

- if you’re inclined to more permanent relationships however, this could become an issue. not the whole whoopee cushion thing the seriousness thing

- just because he does sleep with other people and lowkey tell you all the time about how “That raider was packin, and I don’t mean to be a whore but honestly like if he wanted some he could get some.”, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. it’s just that it’s normal for him to be attracted to other people at the same time. it can be more than one person at once, which can sometimes be a problem if more traditional people not cool with it 

- confronting him about it either to confirm it negatively or positively depends on your preference. he didn’t really think of this as permanent in the first place, more of a friends with benefits situation where you also benefit each other with extreme emotional support, and so you wanting to make it serious will trigger his fear of commitment 

- therefore, if you’re not okay with it he may have a hard time adapting, but if he’s really grown on you then he can try to be better about it. he won’t make the one he loves uncomfortable without their permission, but he’ll try his best to explain it (the best that he can doesn't necessarily that he’ll do it well though) 

- if you’re alright with it then he will most likely bring up the topic of either threesomes/poly-somes and/or adding someone else to your romantic stuff or something like that if either of areyou is interested. communication is key in this sort of thing, and so he’ll almost always go to you before like trying to initiate anything with someone after talking with them and you about the situation 

- oh did I mention fear of commitment? Cause I’m about to get real angsty 

- MAN does he have an issue with it. not only that, but the reason he doesn’t really view this thing as permanent is because he’s fairly certain he’ll outlive you. he's terrified of loosing you one day and then not knowing what the he'll to do with himself for the rest of his life. he’s scared of being tied down it totally goes against his whole thing of freedom, and since he’s already conflicted about anarchy and order he literally avoids thinking about settling down with anyone or anything 

- he’s holding onto a past that brought him joy then, but could ruin him now. and the best way to deal with that is to try to get through it as best as you can and leave the past behind, but he still finds himself reminiscing about things that could’ve happened 

- it keeps him up sometimes, thinking about it. he’ll lay flat on his back in bed, staring at the ceiling for hours at a time just... thinking. and only when he’s lightly pressed about it will he say something, and even then it seems more like he’s struggling to find the words. It’s weird how he can talk to goodneighbor’s citizens like it’s nothing, but talking about himself gets him all choked up 

- he would very much like it if you just like, kissed his face or hold his hand sometimes. to him it speaks more than a thousand words, and if he’s really having a hard time it means everything for you to be there for him 

- that, and with the fact that you’re his best friend means that you’re his ride or die partner in crime 

- just sitting around and doing chems with you and getting all philosophical or doing dumb shit is pretty much all he needs to be satisfied with you, and he really likes hearing you talk about pre-war society 

- whether your views are negative or positive, he likes hearing about the way things used to work. he likes your stories about how you grew up and how you came to be who you are today, and a lot of the time he finds himself asking you about something he doesn’t know because you’re technically the ultimate source of knowledge on that stiff by this point 

- you’d have to assure him that you didn’t know everything and no, you had no idea what year that random object he found was made, but he likes it anyway. you pique his interest, and just sharing a few mindset traits with you makes him feel much more secure and like you’ve got something that matters to the both of you 

- that, and he thinks you’re the coolest motherfucker on the planet 

- he’d probably be more attracted to free spirits, those who hold a strong moral code and defend it like it’s their lifeline. obviously he has a wide range of romantic and causal interest guidelines, but that’s the key point there. Someone who stands for what they believe in and protects those around them 

- and NOW for my favorite part, miscellaneous headcanons ; 

he’s probably the most openly sexual out of all the companions besides Gage, but tbh gage isn't down to walk naked through commonwealth and he is so obviously he’s the most freaky 

he’s more himbo oriented, although with this chart done originally by @cockneydio​

I can tell you that he’s this 👌 close to being a feral himbo and is probably turned on by danger so you can already tell what kinda bitch he is 

he likes to give you his jacket when you’re cold or he just feels like it and it usually smells like cigarettes and gunpowder 

thinks that pastel colors and soft clothes are kind of cute on people for some reason 

is a sucker for pda, might die if you kiss on his neck or tell him he looks nice that day while you’re in public. Also super into just randomly slapping your ass because he finds it hilarious (slapping his ass in turn earns you a flirty comment and a mildly turned on raisin man) 

loves receiving gifts from you and equally as much giving them, which is commonly just cool little things he’s found and thought you would like 

makes cheesy pick up lines all the time and you can’t change my mind 

would die for pet names, given or received. like yes call him “honey” and “sugar” he will MELT he's just a big nerd

he's kinda self conscious about himself around you, but likes phsycial contact too much to deny himself of it so he's literally always attached to you and/or on top of you if he can help it

- hancock isn’t feral, but he sure does act like it sometimes. what he needs is someone who can balance him out and give him the space when he needs it, and who genuinely cares about he people around them regardless of who or what they are. just being there for him on the bad days means the world to him, and he wouldn’t give what y'all have up for all the caps and chems in the world

[anotherdayinchuckletown]

They’re Funny That Way

Chapter 3

A/N: Hello, lovelies, I’m rolling out this chapter about a month after I had originally planned to! Wonderful!  Honestly, though, I’m really happy with how this one eventually turned out, and I hope you all enjoy it.  We’re gonna be getting to that good shit soon, y’all, I promise.  What can I say, I love me a good slow burn.

(cross-posted to my AO3 @ marie_deneuve)

Summary: Emma finds herself locked out of her apartment, leading to an unexpected meeting with her next-door neighbor.

Arthur's mission to conveniently bump into Emma again is proving incredibly difficult.

It's hard enough simply pinning down her schedule, with how sporadically she must leave the apartment. However, luck is on Arthur's side today, and he spots her in the hallway as he is leaving to run some errands that morning. His heart stutters as he recognizes her figure just before she reaches the stairs and descends out of view.

Heaven help him, she's even more beautiful than he remembered. He hasn't seen her since that time in the elevator - well, not in person, at least.

She has visited him every night in his fantasies - watching Murray with him while resting her head on his shoulder. Comforting him when harsh nightmares jolt him awake. Telling him that she's proud of him in that soft, melodious voice. That voice that's been echoing in his head and taunting him, driving him mad because he can't recreate her tone exactly, can't match her precise cadence on his own.

Last time they met, she had shaken his hand without a second thought. Arthur had been wearing gloves at the time as part of his work attire, and he'd been kicking himself for it ever since. She reached out and touched him, and he didn't even get the benefit of feeling her hand against his! Pressing that glove to his face as he slept that night had been mildly comforting, but it was no substitute for the real thing.

It's his one day off this week; he definitely has time for a little detour. Maybe if he runs into her somewhere along her way, makes it seem natural, she'll touch him again? He imagines how soft she must feel, how warm. He wants to pull her into his arms, tangle his fingers in her blonde waves, bury his face in the curve of her neck.

Those are the thoughts propelling him forward as he accompanies her through the streets of Gotham that morning, hood of his tan windbreaker up and obscuring his face. "Accompanies" may not be the correct word if one person is unaware of the other's presence, but Arthur isn't too caught up in semantics at the moment. No, he's much more preoccupied with following that streak of golden hair weaving through the foot traffic at a frustratingly quick pace. It's a good thing Emma doesn't share Arthur's talent for disappearing into crowds, he thinks to himself.

If anything, it's the opposite. Gotham City has a perpetual storm cloud hanging over it. Or perhaps it would be more apt to say that Gotham City is the storm cloud. Everything is a different shade of gray, the streets, the smog in the sky, even the people. She is the only splash of color for miles - all reds and blacks and spun gold, shining despite it being overcast.

He maintains several yards between them, knowing that if he gets caught prematurely, he risks scaring her off for good. The last thing he would ever want is for Emma to feel unsafe around him, and there is really no explaining this one away. Hi, I know this looks bad, but I'm that clown you were really nice to on the elevator a few days ago. Anyway, it's been a few days, and I just had to see you again because I can't stop thinking about you, even though we barely know each other. Have coffee with me?

Yeah, real smooth.

His insecurity is gaining on him, when suddenly, Emma slows in front of a store window - Cypi's Bakery, to be exact. Arthur swiftly ducks into the nearest alleyway, poking his head out to see what it is that captured her attention.

Her gaze is fixed on a chocolate croissant on one of the display shelves. She steps right up to the glass, transfixed.

It's the perfect opportunity to approach her. She's so close, it's nearly impossible not to make himself known and reach out to her. It's like the universe is dangling her right in front of his nose, teasing him. Look! She's right here! Come and get her!

What would he say, though? Scratch that, what would a normal person say? Try as he might, he can't quite find the words.

Seconds tick by, and Emma finally checks her watch, rolls her eyes, and with one last forlorn glance at the pastry, continues down the sidewalk. Several feet behind her, Arthur is rolling his eyes as well - he dawdled too long and missed his chance.

She has already rounded a corner by the time Arthur trudges out from his hiding spot, defeated. He tugs his hood down and attempts to straighten his ruffled hair with a sigh, Gothamites shouldering past him without so much as a glance.

Oh, well. Like he could have held the conversation without royally fucking it up anyway.

Perhaps this isn't a total loss - he can still buy her a gift. He knows what she wants now, after all. It will stretch his budget a little - unless he can ration out his cigarettes until the end of the week - but if it will make her smile, it will all be worth it.

He decides he'll wait a little while after she returns home, and then leave the box on her doorstep. With an anonymous note letting her know it's for her, of course.

Can't have that noisy brother of hers stealing her gifts.

______________________________________

One week.

One week, and Emma has already reached the end of her fucking rope with this building.

If it isn't the deathtrap elevator, it's the water heater. If it isn't the water heater, it's the absent staff. If it isn't the absent staff, it's the rusted spare key she's been given breaking completely off in her deadbolt, leaving her stranded in the hallway with five bags' worth of clothing and hygiene products.

Today, it's the spare key thing.

For a while, all Emma can do is stare in disbelief at the piece remaining in her hand, the way one might stare at someone running naked between the floats at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. She knows there's no one downstairs at the moment to let her in, or even to get the old key out of the lock. Eddie has the afternoon shift, so he's definitely at work right now. She could just wait at Sophie's for him to return, but she won't even be off for another hour.

It's a perfect cocktail, she thinks. And then she hates herself even more for making an alcohol metaphor when she just took that damn bartending job she doesn't really want earlier today.

She's meant to start working at The Harlequin this weekend, which means two more nights attempting to sleep on that awful air mattress before then. Her new one is set to be delivered sometime after that, and she had to pawn her wedding ring just to afford it. Despite the foul memories behind it, that ring was the only nice thing she had left. Now, she truly has nothing. She can't even get into her own home.

So what does she do? She thinks of the only honorable thing a lady can do in this situation, which would be to march back downstairs, go out to the payphone on the street corner, and call Eddie for help.

And then she does the opposite of that.

With a defeated groan, she throws down her bags and slides down the wall until she's seated on the floor. And keeps sliding until she's lying fully on her back, her bags strewn around her, pathetic puddle of bad luck that she is.

A part of her is ashamed of this private tantrum, and another part of her couldn't give less of a fuck anymore. Hasn't she earned the right to a couple meltdowns?

Emma is broken out of her reverie when the door to the adjacent apartment swings open. The person must not look down in time to notice the mess of a woman lying right outside the door, nor the shopping bags scattered like land mines.

It all happens so fast after that.

The person trips over one of the bags, and Emma has no time to brace herself before their entire body weight slams down onto her at full force.

She lets out a pained whine as the person's bony elbow meets her stomach, knocking the wind out of her. Her head instinctively jerks back, colliding clumsily into the wall behind her, and she briefly sees stars.

Clearly not expecting to effectively elbow drop some woman like a WWF wrestler, the person scrambles wildly on top of her, not helping her discomfort in the least. They flail backwards until they're sitting up on the floor next to her, and Emma finally gets a good look at them as she gasps inelegantly in an attempt to refill her lungs.

It's a man, older than she is, possibly in his early forties. The wrinkles adorning his gaunt face tell a story of utmost exhaustion, and he's dangerously thin, like he hasn't had a proper meal in ages. Brown curls float a touch above his angular shoulders, and his sunken green eyes...look quite familiar. The sudden hypoxia could just be playing tricks on her, though.

Those same eyes finally seem to focus in on her, and he looks at her like he recognizes her as well. She watches his expression quickly shift from confused shock to abject horror.

As Emma finally gets her diaphragm under control, she does her best to sit up, her abs screaming in protest. That'll be a nasty bruise. "Ugh," she groans out. "Holy shit, I'm so sorry! Are you all right, sir?"

The man pauses, thick brows furrowing. "I...I landed on you, and you're apologizing to me?" he asks, perplexed, as if the person who tripped him being repentant about it is the wildest thing he's heard all week. Here in Gotham City, it probably is.

His voice is soft, and upon hearing it, Emma shaves ten years off of her previous estimate of his age. He stares at her guiltily, as if he's just waiting to be reprimanded, despite the whole ordeal not being his fault.

Damn, where has she seen him before?

"What do you mean? Of course I am, I was in your way." Emma goes to gather up her things, still seated against the door to her apartment. "Let me just move these..."

"N-no, it's...it's okay!" the man stutters out. He rushes to stand, and even helps her to move the rest of her things up against the wall.

There's a long and awkward pause before he continues. "If you don't mind, um..." His eyes dart between her and his shoes. "What were you doing out here like that?"

"Oh! Ha, good question." Emma shows him the key - or rather, what's left of it. "It would appear that I'm locked out. It was either do this or throw myself off the roof, and I'm too tired to climb any more stairs today."

Emma briefly wonders whether she should be joking that way in front of a stranger. To her relief, he doesn't seem the least bit unsettled by her dark humor. He simply grins at her bashfully. His eyes briefly light up in turn, the spark so dim and fleeting that, had she blinked, she would have missed it altogether.

And that's when it hits her.

"I've got it!" she exclaims, clapping once. "I know where I've seen you before!"

"Y-you do?" The man appears startled.

"Yeah! It was bugging me, but I remember now." She points one red-painted fingernail at him. "You're that clown! The one I saw in the elevator on my first day here!"

He actually looks relieved at that for some reason, and he visibly relaxes. "Oh, right! I, um...forgot about that." He scratches at the back of his head. "I'm surprised you recognized me - or Carnival, actually. That's my clown name at work."

The irony makes Emma giggle. This skinny, timid man in a knit sweater and loafers puts on greasepaint and dances around at parties for a living... Somehow, she can't picture it, and she's even seen him in full costume. Right now he looks like a sad accountant. Or like Mister Rogers.

Sick of craning her head up to talk to him, she stands as well, brushing some dust off the sleeves of her black cardigan. "I can't say I've ever met a clown off the clock before," she says. "Your life must be a lot more interesting than mine."

His answer comes out slightly pained. "I really doubt that... What do you do?"

"I just became a bartender over at The Harlequin." Emma rolls her eyes and shrugs, smiling wryly. "It's a job. Hopefully a stepping stone, so I can get out of here before long." She gestures to her door. "Pretty sad that I can't even manage to get in today."

The man chuckles at her dry excuse for a joke - shyly, as if he's afraid of it being heard. Emma can't tell if she's being genuinely charming or if this guy just pities her. She hasn't been paying too much attention to his body language, so far down the shitter is her initiative to do so. She just wants to curl up in bed.

Being back in Gotham has been all right so far - preferable to the alternative, at least - but she can't seem to shake the cloud of dread that manifests each time she's not immediately busy with something. She figures it's stress-related. After all, there's so much to do in the coming months, just in regards to dealing with judges and lawyers. These things take ages, even if both parties are cooperative. She's not lucky enough to have the sort of divorce all little girls dream of...

She must have started to zone out because she's suddenly brought back by the man exclaiming, "I-I have pliers!"

Emma peers at him, quirking an eyebrow.

"For your door!" he elaborates. "I can't get you into your apartment, but I can at least get your key back!" Quieter, not meeting her gaze, he adds, "And then, you know, if you need to call someone...you're welcome to come in and use my phone."

Emma blinks, momentarily taken aback by this Good Samaritan. "Uh...yeah, that would be great! Thank you!" She reaches down and starts to collect her bags. "Good thing I bumped into one of the only nice people in the city."

While she's retrieving the last of her things, something at her feet catches her eye. There's a sealed envelope on the floor near where she was sitting earlier. Curious, she picks it up, and then balks at the name of the recipient.

"Woah!" She holds the envelope out incredulously. "This letter is addressed to Thomas Wayne! ...Did you drop this?"

Based on what Emma has seen of recent headlines, Thomas Wayne is a frontrunner in Gotham's upcoming mayoral election. As if Gotham doesn't have enough problems - the last thing the city needs is a pigheaded authoritarian billionaire running things. This guy who's been so kind as to help her couldn't possibly be a fan, right?

The man appears mildly annoyed, although not at her. Taking it from her outstretched hand, he says, "Yeah, I did. It's not mine, though - my...m-mother asked me to mail it." He rushes through that last part in a low voice, and Emma realizes he's embarrassed.

If he does still live with his mother, it's only natural that a man his age would feel insecure about it. She's always found the stigma silly, personally. What is Western culture's obsession with "leaving the nest" as soon as humanly possible, even to the child's detriment? Why, if Emma's parents were still around...

Never mind that.

She has no time to reassure her companion before he changes the subject. "I'll handle it later. I should help you first." With his free hand, he pulls out his key and goes to unlock the door to his apartment.

"Hang on a second!" Emma smacks her own forehead, and he freezes. "God, I'm so rude. What's wrong with me?" She shakes her head. "You're being extremely helpful, and I haven't even asked your name! Your real name, that is - I'd imagine it's not always Carnival, right?"

"Heh, right... My name's Arthur."

"Arthur," she repeats, not half minding the way it sounds in her own voice. "It's nice to officially meet you, Arthur."

Predictably, he looks flustered as he replies, "Yeah... Nice to see you again, Emma."

He unlocks the door, holding it open for her, and the smell of cigarette smoke mixed with high-end perfume wafts out. It's not her favorite scent in the world, but it's familiar - comforting, even.

Inside, gaudy pink plaid lines the walls, a sharp contrast to Eddie's taupe covered with band posters. The living room, or at least what she can see of it, is neat and tidy, despite the abundance of knick-knacks covering each surface.

Although, not a single family photo in sight, Emma notes. Some people simply don't have them lying around. She and Eddie are much the same way.

Lingering self-consciously in the foyer, she spots an older woman reclining in an armchair across the room. Arthur's mother, she presumes. Hearing the door, the woman turns and regards her, then Arthur, confusion plain on her features.

"Happy? I didn't know you were having company." Mild surprise colors her voice, affirming Emma's theory that Arthur doesn't get visitors often.

"It's just one of the neighbors, Ma! She's locked out!" he calls back. Squeezing past Emma, he slips into the kitchen and discards the Thomas Wayne letter on the counter. Rummaging through one of the drawers, he produces a pair of pliers rustier than the key that had gotten her into this mess.

"I'll be right back," he tells her. "The phone is in the hallway behind you, if you need to use it." And with that, he rushes back outside before she can even thank him.

Feeling Arthur's mother's eyes burning holes in the back of her head, she does step into the hallway, partly to call Eddie and partly to get out of her line of sight. Emma struggles to remember the number for his store, but breathes a sigh of relief when someone picks up on the third ring.

"G-String's, this is Ron."

Christ, she always forgets that's the name he decided on. "Ron, it's Emma. Is my brother there?"

Before he can answer, she faintly hears Eddie's voice in the background saying that, yes, he is still out of Pink Floyd's The Wall. "Yeah, he's right here, what's up?"

"Good. Listen, tell him I got locked out of the apartment, and I'm heading down to borrow his key." She dreads the walk. It's not far, but her arms are already sore from the shopping bags weighing them down.

Momentarily ignoring Emma, Ron starts talking away from the receiver. "Dude, it's your sister, she's locked outta the house... Okay, I'll tell her. Hey, Emma, he's on his way."

"What? I just said I'd-"

"Too late, he's grabbing his shit."

Emma groans. "Fine. Tell him I'm waiting for him in 8J."

"Will do." A pause. "So, uh... I hear you're single again-"

She hangs up.

She barely wanders back into the foyer when Arthur's mother surprises her by saying, "It's no use standing around over there. Sit down and make yourself comfortable, dear." She gestures vaguely to the sofa next to her.

Emma complies, stepping gingerly into the living room. She sits at the end of the couch, as far away as humanly possible, and sets her bags down underneath the coffee table, her arms crying out in relief.

"My brother should be here any minute," she begins sheepishly. "I'm so sorry to intrude like this, Miss..." She trails off.

"Penny," the woman supplies. "It's no trouble."

A stodgy local political forum is playing on the television. This is a particularly conservative broadcast by the sound of it, anchors harping primarily on Gotham's floundering economy and the ramifications of a potential garbage strike.

Penny is watching raptly, and Emma uses the opportunity to peer over at her. She certainly is done up to be sitting around at home. Sure, she's in button-up flannel pajamas, but she's also wearing a full face of makeup, and her graying hair, fading from strawberry-blonde, is curled. Underneath it all, the wrinkles on her face betray a beautiful visage. Emma feels oddly intimidated all of a sudden, trying to make a good impression on this woman who gives an air of having once been one of the most stunning girls in Gotham.

As if sensing her unease, Arthur returns. He hastily crosses the room and presents Emma with the other half of her key. "I'm sorry it took me so long... It was really in there."

She smiles gratefully up at him. "Oh, don't apologize. You totally saved my hide out there."

Still not quite on board with the whole eye contact deal, he busies himself by straightening up the coffee table. Lifting an empty mug, he looks up at Penny. "Oh, you finished your tea already. Want me to make more?"

"If it's not too much trouble."

"Of course!" He starts for the kitchen. "Emma, do you drink chamomile?"

She does, but politely declines, already feeling like she's taking advantage of his kindness. He only looks a little dejected by her refusal.

As Arthur bustles around the kitchen, silence descends upon the living room, save for the droning of the television. The subject has changed; the anchors have moved on from essentially blaming the working class for not making enough money to worshiping the ground their candidate Thomas Wayne walks upon. How original.

Penny practically lunges to raise the volume, startling Emma. "Did you mail my letter, Happy?" she interjects without looking away from the screen.

"I didn't make it downstairs yet." He assures her, "I'll do it before the mailman gets here."

"Don't forget. It's very important," Penny insists somewhat curtly.

"That Thomas Wayne is polling pretty high these days, isn't he?" Emma muses, attempting to make small talk.

Penny instantly perks up. "Yes, that's what everybody on the news is saying. It's a good thing he's running this year. He's exactly what this city needs, don't you think?"

Hardly, but Emma elects to keep her opinion to herself. Instead, she blurts out, "I met him a few years ago."

Penny looks positively awestruck. "You did, really? Oh, he's a wonderful man, isn't he?"

She did technically meet him, although she never spoke to him personally. It was at a benefit that Daniel had dragged her along to, so that he could network (code for smooth talk billionaires). They had conversed for a grand total of thirty seconds, shaken hands, and that was the end of that. He had come off every bit as arrogant and self-important as she would expect of the CEO of a multi-billion dollar industrial corporation. He and Daniel were two peas in a pod.

"...My husband seemed to like him."

The clattering in the kitchen stops cold.

The sudden absence of sound causes her to remember herself. "I mean, my ex - my ex-husband. Excuse me, I'm newly separated. Still getting used to it."

"So sorry to hear that," Penny tells her, not sounding in the least bit sympathetic. Not that Emma needs, or even wants, sympathy.

She instead returns to the previous subject, with Emma half-listening. Apparently, Penny worked for the Wayne family years ago, and is now chock-full of anecdotes from within Wayne Manor.

Emma smiles and nods along. Penny clearly sees her idol though rose-colored glasses, but there's no use telling her that. She must be delighted simply to have someone new to talk to, and Emma would hate to spoil it for her.

Arthur emerges with a steaming mug of chamomile tea and a facial expression that lets Emma know he's far sicker of these stories than she is. Nevertheless, he hands his mother the mug, giving her shoulder an affectionate pat.

The scene has her beaming up at the back of Arthur's head as something stirs deep within her. Something like the first sip of hot chocolate on a snowy morning, coursing through her veins and warming her from the inside out.

Before he can sit down, there's a loud knocking accompanied by a shout of "Hey, Em, you in there?"

"Ah, that's my cue." Emma gathers her things as Arthur hurries to answer the door. She says her goodbyes to Penny, but she's once again engrossed in her program and only offers a halfhearted "goodbye, dear" in return.

Eddie waits in the entryway, arms crossed, his voice booming in the otherwise quiet apartment. "Thanks for the excuse to break early today, ya lucky ladybug. You wouldn't believe some of the idiots coming into the store, you know what I'm saying?" He reaches down to ruffle her hair when she gets within range.

"Glad my misfortune was useful." She notices how Eddie completely towers over Arthur, whose hands fidget anxiously as he hangs back, unsure of what to do with himself. It's honestly sort of endearing how tiny he is, how she could probably lift him up if given the chance.

"I owe you one, Arthur. Knock if you ever need anything, okay?" Emma extends a hand, similar to their first meeting.

This time, Arthur immediately clasps her hand in his, with a grip that is equal parts firm and sweaty. "Okay, and the same goes for you." Eddie good-naturedly claps him once on the back, clearly taking him off-guard, and he drops her hand.

She's poised to head out when Arthur stops her, saying, "Oh, one more thing!"

He zips out of sight for just a moment before reappearing with a small, white box. "This is for you."

After all that, he's even giving her a gift? She starts to dissuade him, but he holds the box out toward her, close enough that social etiquette dictates she take it. And so she does, brows drawing together. "You're too nice, Arthur, thank you."

"Take care, man," Eddie says, finally ushering a confused Emma out the door.

When the door clicks shut behind them, he immediately fixes her with a long and pointed stare. For a second, Emma thinks he's pissed for having to walk all the way back home, but then he breaks the silence.

"So...you and the neighbor, huh?"

Emma tilts her head. "Me and the neighbor?"

"Lemme see this." He grabs the box out of her hands, ignoring her protests. A glance inside, and he shuts it again, raising his eyebrows at her in a nonverbal "I told you so" before handing it back and unlocking their door with a flourish.

"What? What is that face? What's in there?"

"A Cypi's croissant, Em? Oh, he's got it bad for you."

She snatches it back, indignant. "Ugh, you're delusional. I've met him once before; he probably just felt sorry for me."  Although, she had really been craving one of those since she passed by the store on her walk this morning. What a happy coincidence.

"Don't be so naive. You have any idea how many girlfriends I've hit that place up for on Valentine's Day? You don't bust out the Cypi's unless you're seriously looking to drop some panties."

"Gross. Thanks for coming to get me, but never talk to me about panties."

It's strange to think that the seemingly mild-mannered, reticent man who gifted her a croissant has such a blood-curdling laugh. It would have been incredibly rude to bring it up today, when he had so kindly gone out of his way for her. Surely, there's a courteous method to broaching the subject? It would be unfortunate to hurt his feelings and topple the precarious acquaintanceship they were building.

She is pleasantly surprised that night when the walls are resoundingly, blissfully silent.

[shireness-says]

Heat

Summary: There's only so much that one can do on a hot and lazy morning. Luckily, Killian has a wife to do it with. Or: CS honeymoon sex. ~3.3K. Rated E for, you know, the sex. Also on AO3.

~~~~~

A/N: Here it is - my second contribution to the @csseptembersunshine! I don’t know where this smut came from. I’m sure y’all won’t complain too much. Special thanks to my beta, @snidgetsafan, for taking the time to remind me what is and isn’t anatomically possible. Limbs are weird, guys. 

Tagging the interested parties: @profdanglaisstuff, @snowbellewells, @thisonesatellite, @optomisticgirl, @phiralovesloki, @kmomof4, @let-it-raines, @winterbaby89, @awkwardnessandbaseball, @teamhook, @thejollyroger-writer

Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

~~~~~

“Knees are so fucking weird,” Emma comments from beside him. It’s still early morning, the sunlight barely peeking through the gauzy curtains they’d hung together in their bedroom, and Killian had been under the apparently mistaken impression that they were both dozing comfortably in the dim morning light. It’s hot in the middle of summer, even in Maine, and even this early in the morning. They barely have a sheet on the bed, and as Killian reluctantly peels an eye open, he can see that Emma’s stuck a leg out from underneath them, likely in search of the breeze from the ceiling fan. It already flutters at the opened drapes on their four-poster bed and licks along the uncovered skin of his shoulders where his right arm is slung over Emma’s waist.

His wife.

They’d been a little too busy attempting to defeat the Black Fairy for him to really revel in that title in the immediate aftermath, but he’s determined to make up for that now. For so long, he thought he’d never get married, never experience this kind of quiet domesticity and the comfort of knowing that you definitely, irrevocably belong with another person. Of course, marriage is just a social institution, two names on a paper and an unnecessarily opulent ritual, but there’s a solemnity to pledging yourself to another person in front of witnesses. None of it will change anything; they committed to each other long ago, but still…

He has a wife.

They're on their honeymoon, supposedly, or at least as close to one as they'll get with the ever-present threats that come with living in Storybrooke. Leaving town had been out of the question; Emma hadn't been comfortable with the idea of leaving her son when the Black Fairy's minions might still have been about. Things have been quiet since the old witch's defeat, but everyone seems to be of the same mind that it's best to keep an eye out for the moment. They'd thought about taking the Jolly out as far as the town's boundaries stretched, and there is still something appealing about the idea of nothing but him and Emma and the sea, but they'd ultimately opted just to stay home, cocooned in the house they're still trying to make their own. 

(Just because they're home doesn't mean they're available, however; Emma's put up so many repelling wards, designed to keep out all but Henry - who knows not to interrupt unless death itself is threatening the town - that the house might as well be invisible. The delivery boy has been very good about waiting at the gate for one of them to come down to exchange food for a tip.)

A haze of sex still permeates the room after the activities of the night before. Somewhere in the room is discarded lingerie, a lacy number that Killian had barely restrained himself from tearing straight through when Emma had sauntered out of the bathroom. Their first joining had been heated, furious, suitable for the first night of a delayed honeymoon; the second time around had been more gentle when they'd woken up at half past one, still as hungry but in a measured way that slowly drove their passions higher and higher as they laid on their sides, Killian’s front pressed to Emma’s back as he took her from behind,, all just barely visible in the light of a candle hastily lit by magic.

As for round three... that's still to be seen.

"Not a sentence I expected to hear," he yawns, stretching himself into full consciousness. "Should I be insulted?"

"I mean, if you want to be," Emma snickers. "I was talking about my own knees, but yeah, yours are pretty weird looking too. Hairy."

"Oi!" he protests, wiggling his fingers against Emma's side to make her squirm. That's another benefit of marriage, or at least of finding himself in a committed relationship: learning all of Emma's ticklish spots, and the best way to exploit them. "You like that hair. Elsewhere, at least, if the way you moan when my chest hair rubs against your nipples is any indication."

"Yeah, but leg hair is different," Emma protests in between bursts of laughter.

"And how is that, pray tell?" He stills his fingers for just a moment to let Emma catch her breath. Now that he's awake, there's other things he'd rather do with those fingers anyways - so many places to stroke and tease to coax his darling wife into a state of indescribable pleasure.

"It just is. Because I say so," she grins cheekily.

"Is that so?"

"It is. And you know, if you want this marriage thing to go well, it'd probably be a good idea to remember that. I'm always going to be right. Happy wife, happy life, or something."

"Oh, I'll show you a happy wife," he growls, abruptly capturing her lips in a fierce kiss. It's like his blood springs to a boil immediately, the very touch of her lips setting him on fire. Not that they're stopping at just a gentle brush of the lips; Emma's mouth parts readily to admit his seeking tongue, and he takes full advantage of that permission to practically devour her. There's no resisting temptation when she tastes this good, and Emma gives as good as she gets, nipping at his bottom lip and making him moan - a fact that makes her lips quirk up delightedly. Killian sucks on her own lip in turn before inching his hand up to cup a breast. It only takes a few passes of his thumb to coax the bud to alert tightness, pebbled and sensitive. Emma arches to meet his touch, but that only causes her other nipple to brush against the chest hair she'd so maligned earlier, and her breath catches in a sudden gasp.

"I told you so, love," he teases, only breaking away from her mouth to deliver his mild mockery. 

"Oh shut up," she growls back. "Just kiss me, Jones."

"As you wish, Mrs. Jones." He hasn't had a chance to use that particular title nearly enough; he’ll have to rectify that in the near future, as many times as he can. 

Somehow, their kisses slow down, become deeper and more thorough. On a morning like this, with no family expecting them and no threat knocking on their door, they've got all the time in the world, and Killian intends to take advantage of every moment. He'd be a fool not to, really.

When he moves to shift his weight over her body, though, Emma hums a note of protest. Killian moves swiftly back to the side, putting some space between them. “Sorry, love, I —”

“No, no, it’s not that I’m not in the mood, it’s just —” she huffs, the noise filled with obvious frustration. “It’s too fucking hot.”

Killian laughs. Even if he’s left a space between his and Emma’s bodies for the moment, his fingertips still trace patterns along the naked skin of her stomach and thighs. “This summer has been fierce,” he admits. Even this early in the morning - it can’t be much past seven, if that - he can already feel the humidity beginning to collect in every corner of the room. Today’s going to be a scorcher.

Emma flops her head over dramatically to meet his eyes. “Sorry,” she grimaces, “but even the sheet feels like too much.”

“That’s quite alright, love,” he replies, stretching his neck to drop a light kiss on her cheek. “I understand.” They lay in a peaceful silence for a minute, bodies pulled between a simmering arousal and that early morning lethargy that still might pull them back under into sleep. Slowly, a plan starts to form in his mind. “Though out of curiosity…” he begins before trailing off again.

“Yeah?”

“Is your only opposition to a little… shall we say, early morning delight the aforementioned heat?” As he speaks, Killian lets his fingers quest across her outer thigh again, his arm thrown across her belly. 

A slow, sly smile inches its way across Emma’s face where she still faces him, almost a smirk. He’d almost say that was something she picked up from him, if it wasn’t somehow such an Emma thing. “You got a plan in mind, Captain?” she asks, punctuating the word with a hard consonant and a salacious lick of her lips. If Killian’s arousal had been flagging after their brief intermission, that gesture alone sparks a new fire in him; beneath the thin sheet, he can feel his cock harden in renewed interest. 

(Her bare breasts might have something to do with that too, especially with the way she’s stretched to display them to their best advantage. It doesn’t hurt, either, knowing that he’s got her all to himself for days and days yet, and as his wife.

Has he mentioned yet just how glorious it is to be married to the love of his life?)

“Maybe,” he smirks back, before abruptly using his hand to pull Emma onto his own body. She quickly catches on, moving to sit up and properly straddle his body. For the moment, she still rests on his torso, the delectable swell of her buttocks just resting on his hip bones. The aforementioned knees pose more of a challenge as Emma nearly jabs him in the side trying to settle into position. It’s hard to care too much when she’s smiling so happily, but he still can’t help but tease her a bit for it.

“There’s easier ways to take my breath away, darling,” he winks.

“Shut up and kiss me, pirate.”

He complies, of course; he’d be a fool to argue with that kind of command. He pulls Emma down roughly to meet his lips with his hand to the back of her head and his stump on her hips, allowing her hair to cascade around them. Killian allows the kiss for a moment, lets them resume their earlier dueling of tongues and crushing of lips as Emma tries to grind down on his abdomen, before he breaks them apart again, pulling Emma’s hips forward until she’s forced to sit back up or crack her spine in half.

“What are you doing?” she laughs. “Doesn’t this defeat the point?”

“Maybe I’ve got a different idea.” If his tone itself  weren’t salacious enough, the way he raises his eyebrow ought to drive that home. Well, that and the way he keeps pulling Emma’s hips further and further up his body. “One I think you’ll like.”

Never let it be said that his Swan isn’t a quick study - especially where a prospect so obvious and enjoyable is involved. She braces her hands against the wall, just above where the wrought iron of their bed frame stops, as Killian pulls her just that last inch into place. There’s something so primal and beautiful, so arousing, about the sight of her folds glistening just inches above his mouth, just begging him to reach up for a taste of her core. Come to think about it, there’s no reason he shouldn’t do exactly that, and with that realization, Killian wraps his hand and stump around the outside of Emma’s thighs to rest along the flesh of her hips and draw her down within proper reach of his mouth.

There’s nothing truly different about attempting this while married than while courting or while betrothed (aside from the ring on his finger, of course), but Killian feels inclined this morning to put a little extra care - or rather, a little extra tenderness; the care is always there, implicit and inextricable in every movement he makes where his love is concerned - into the way he loves her with his mouth. Perhaps he need not be so meticulous - after all, Emma begins to squirm at the mere feel of his warm breath across her center- but he takes his time anyways, making sure to trace along the outside of her folds with exquisite slowness and care. It’s gratifying to hear the shaky little breath that Emma exhales at the touch, and Killian can’t help but grin from his position under her.

Obviously, she feels that somehow - or maybe sees it; he’s a little too focused on the primal glory before him to see where her own eyes are aimed. “Don’t get cocky on me yet, Jones,” she warns, shifting on her knees in anticipation.

“I thought you liked me cocky, Jones” he says, nosing up towards her nub just to see what kind of noise she makes. “Isn’t that rather the aim of all this?”

(For what it’s worth, that earns him another shaky breath. Excellent.)

“Prove it to me first.”

“Aye, aye, Captain.” He’s more than happy to do exactly that. 

The strokes of his tongue pick up speed over time, alternating with flicks to her clit, before he switches to draw the entire flat of his tongue across her opening. Emma moans in response, and Killian takes it as his permission to advance his efforts, beginning to dip his tongue inside her sheath for a new and intense sensation. His jaw is beginning to ache from his slow and continuous efforts, but that becomes a secondary concern when Emma begins grinding down on his face, seeking more friction and the climax he know must be singing in her veins, just waiting to explode. He’s done his best to pay her nub attention with the nudge of his nose when he’s not bid it the attentions of his tongue, but now he fully shifts his attention there to flick his tongue rapidly over the bit of flesh, bringing his hand around from where it had been bracing her thigh to slip a finger inside her core.. Emma pants heavily at the new sensation, beginning to vocalize high-pitched and breathy sounds, and Killian knows that her bliss must be just within reach. Quickly, he switches to sucking on her clit and slips a second finger within her pulsing sheath and curls them in search of that special spot, and thrusts, and sucks, and thrusts, and curls, and sucks, and sucks…

And Emma falls into her orgasm with a loud cry of relief. As her muscles relax in the aftermath, Emma sags, dropping to lean on the bed frame and inadvertently settling more of her weight onto Killian’s face. Honestly, if this is how he dies… what a way to go.

Emma comes back to herself before that, however, and shifts herself back down his body to drape across Killian’s torso, a happy and boneless mess. The same can’t be said for Killian, however; every nerve in his body feels awake and thirsting for contact, and his cock is hard and throbbing and ready for relief, preferably within the clasp of Emma’s body. The way his erect member just brushes against the flesh of her rear, glancing against her damp flesh as she wriggles in a comfortable position, does not help matters in the least.

“God, you’re good at that,” she sighs.

“I only aim to please my lady,” he replies smoothly.

Emma slowly pushes herself back upright. “Feels like you could use a little pleasing yourself.”

“A man can’t help himself, love, when faced with such a siren as youuuuuu.” The last word ends up exhaled on a desperate hiss as Emma lifts and rearranges herself to grind along his cock. It’s not nearly enough, but it’s something, and after working himself up so much lavishing his attentions onto Emma, it feels bloody fantastic.

“Need you, love,” he manages to gasp out as Emma moves slow enough along his member to drive him crazy with the most pleasurable torture. “Gods, but you feel good. Let me make you feel good too, please, love, please —” He’s practically babbling, but doesn’t have the strength to care, not when he’s so close to exactly what he wants - to bury himself deep within her heat and let her ride them both into completion.

“Something you want, Captain?” she smirks, even if Killian can hear her own breath catch with every pass of her hips. 

“Just you, love,” he gasps - groans. 

Finally, finally, she grasps his cock and guides him to her opening, slowly easing herself down on him in a slick slide. Every shift of her hips as she adjusts herself to her comfort feels glorious; though she’s just rocking her hips back and forth at the moment, settling into his sensual invasion, he can already tell that the moment she starts to properly fuck him, it’ll blow his damn mind and send him into a spectacular orgasm. He just hopes he can hold out more than two minutes.

When Emma does begin to move,  lifting her hips and slamming them back down with a tricky little swivel that sends Killian’s eyes rolling back in his head, he knows he was right to worry. The clench and drag of her core around his cock is exquisite beyond words, especially combined with the way her thumbs scrape across his nipples where she braces herself on his chest. 

For what it’s worth, he does last longer than two minutes; however, it’s hard to think of anything that might temper his arousal when he’s got a perfect view of where their bodies join again and again. There’s something hypnotizing about it, seeing where they become one in body as well as soul. He’s the one who gets to be so fully enveloped by this blonde angel, and it still astounds him every day - married or not. Sweat glistens upon both their skin now, but there’s a satisfaction in knowing that’s because of their exertions, not the heat increasingly gathering as the sun rises higher and higher in the sky. 

Soon enough, though, they hit a point of no return, thankfully shortly after Emma’s own movements become more purposeful and she stops teasing him in order to properly chase her own climax. Killian helps them both along by bracing his feet against the mattress to thrust up, making Emma moan deeply in response. Her hair just teases his kneecaps when she throws her head back in pleasure; between the way her breasts jostle with each thrust and the sight of her long, slender throat, she looks like some kind of sensual painting, or a spirit sent for him to worship (and be worshipped by in return).

“Close,” Emma gasps out. She’s not much of a talker during sex, her moans and gasps instead the evidence of her pleasure; she must have spotted the tell-tale signs of his own impending release, and sought to warn him not to go off without her. Quickly, he moves his fingers just above where they’re joined to rub at her clit and hopefully send her into her climax before he explodes.

It doesn’t quite work; all the sensations are just a bit too much, and Killian can’t hold back any longer, shooting his release with a loud groan. By some miracle - or maybe just clever fingers - Emma’s right behind him, the telltale clench of her orgasm hitting just as Killian’s own pleasure begins to subside. Somehow, he has the presence of mind even in his sated exhaustion to coax her through it with continued pressure against her nub until Emma finally slumps over his body, utterly drained of energy. 

He’d be happy to stay like this forever, just basking in the afterglow with his love (his wife!), but his cock is softening within her body and they really do need to disconnect from one another. Still, once they’ve separated, he clasps Emma to his chest instead of letting her roll off to the side.

“Won’t you get hot?” she murmurs, already falling back towards sleep. 

“See if I care,” he whispers back with a kiss to the crown of her hair.

There’s nowhere else he’d rather be.

[venus-says]

Symphogear AXZ Episodes 01-04

One day, I’m sure we’ll know true strength.

Starting the engines for the final part of this marathon!

Like I said yesterday, I’m super excited about these next few days because from here on now everything will be new content to me, I didn’t check anything about AXZ since 2017, neither have seen anything about XV this year, so except for their posters I’m going totally blind on this and I’m loving every second of it, I feel like a child discovering new thing about the word. I can’t wait to see what this season has in store for me.

So without any further ado, let’s get going!

Croitzal ronzell Gungnir zizzl

So Episode 01 starts very interestingly. At first, I was pretty shocked with seeing the girls going on a military mission using their gears, it seemed very odd considering how reluctant Hibiki is about using her powers on other humans, but then it comes the twist and the military are somehow using alca-noises and that’s when shit goes down and this episode already won me over.

You see, Magical Girls who fight against the evil humankind do to ourselves is my perfect dream as a pitch for a show, yes I love my regular Mahou Shoujo stuff and I don’t see any problems on it but since “dark Mahou Shoujo” is a thing this is what I wanted to the most. And I got a little bit of that in here! And I’m very happy about it.

And even without this element, this is still a pretty badass fight with everything that it has going on for it. Like Hibiki stopping the shoot of a tank, and the way she completely destroyed another tank with her hands, how cool is that???? And Tsubasa’s sword getting gigantic and slashing that big ass air fortress in a single swing like if she was cutting butter? And Chris flying on top of the helicopter like a boss??? Even Maria, Kirika and Shirabe who didn’t do that much fight were pretty cool in here as well. I dare to say, this was the best initial fight we had since when G started this trend. Like c’ mon this one was just amazing.

I also like that they let the action play out smoothly first to just give us a roundabout of everything that was going on in a flashback afterward, it makes for a more dynamic episode imo. I like the concept of the Bavarian illuminatti, having a villain or a secret organization behind events from past seasons can be very good if it's worked properly, my only problem with is that I think it would be more interesting to see this in the final season and use this to tie in any plot point that may be loose from the past seasons, but I still like the concept and I’m open-minded to what they can do in this season.

And since we’re talking about the villains we get to see some of them this episode and for what was shown I think I like them? The only thing that makes me step back from having a final decision is that it seems that one of the girls is supposed to be trans, and it seems that she is the most sexualized from the group and I don’t know if that’s the best way to portrait the character...? Now I may be wrong, maybe she’s a biological woman, but I’m pretty sure her voice actor is a man and I don’t see why they would make this decision unless they were trying to make this very clear and... ugh. I just hope they’ll handle this in a proper way, I'm very doubtful, but if they manage to make her at least decent I’ll be happy with it.

Before moving to the next episode I have three questions: 1, how much time has passed from GX to AXZ?; 2, why is LiNKER still a problem? I thought the chip Ver gave to Maria was to fix this problem; and 3, is the Magical Girl Incident the name they gave for the events from last season or is this a whole new thing that happened in between? I hope we get some answers from here on now.

So before getting into episode 2 let’s give some appreciation to the new opening and ending. While I don’t really like the song the scenes playing in the opening are just amazing, even though we get some minor spoilers from there I still quite like it, my favorite moments are Hibiki, Shirabe and Maria in the training montage, they’re just too good. About the ending, while the pictures in there are nothing that special this probably my favorite ending so far.

Now to the episode itself. To starters let me leave my ode to Maria in this episode. Even though she herself hasn’t snagged any victory in this episode she still shone like no other. Her new song was great and she was amazing in her battles, especially in the second one, she was brilliant. And also that moment of her with Elfnein was just so adorable. Best girl.

The other battle of this episode was pretty interesting as well. I believe this is the first time we see a symphogear hurting a civilian and it’s quite shocking. I don’t necessarily know if shooting the boy’s leg was really the only way to save him but regardless of it is still a pretty interest conflict to develop. Now, I do think that making the boy the brother of someone who we’ve never seen before and that has a very complicated relationship with Chris was a bit too much, but I’m interested to see what comes out from it.

The backstory of the Illuminati is quite interesting as well, but they’ve shown that to us in the most boring way ever, and also I don’t like how Saint-Germain's (that’s her name right?) speech is so out of place in that situation. Like, you’re with two comrades that are on your side and probably already know the history, making her state that in that moment is just off. Just like that weird relic, which I have many questions about but I know they’ll explain it later (at least I hope so).

Episode 3 is probably the worst one of this batch. It does some nice things like giving more information about the Illuminati, I’m particularly curious about this new autoscorer and it’s weird resemblance to Hibiki, Maria and Tsubasa escape from the noise attack is also pretty good, and in the second fight, we get probably one of the cooler attacks we’ve seen so far. But that’s pretty much it and this isn’t enough to hold this episode against the bad things it has going on.

This episode starts very off and the ending of the fight that started on the last one was very anticlimactic. Then we have the big boss of this season saying to destroy the gears when this was something GX has already done. We get a boring part that was all just exposition about the gears. And the most boring part was all that technical talk about the subspace pocket that just made me confused as hell. Also, just episode 3 and we’re already over-dependant of the ignite module as it seems... I hope this doesn’t mean another mechanic that’ll make this one (THAT IS DANGEROUS ENOUGH ALREADY) obsolete and banalize another mortal thing.

I wish they’ve done more with Chris struggle more than just mention it and not really dig on it, maybe this would balance things out a little and make this episode less frustrating. Sadly that wasn’t the case so I’ll just move on before I fall asleep and don’t finish this post in time.

I’ve said 3 was the worst, but actually, thinking about it now, episode 4 is probably the worst.

How to begin this one?

For starters, what the hell was the writing team thinking when they just explicitly told that using condoms isn’t good????????? Like, I understand y’all are trying to make people fuck so the birth-rate can rise again BUT HAVE CONSCIOUS ABOUT THIS THING YOU DUMBASSES, CONDOMS DO MORE THAN JUST PREVENT CHILDREN YOU FUCKS. Gosh, I’m so mad at this I just wanna kick some people in the balls.

Then we have that Cagliostro fight THAT SERVES NO PURPOSE AT ALL. She basically just got kicked in the ass and neither sides got anything from it. It was such a waste of time, and they even managed to revert Chris to the “let everything to me, I can handle it” bullshit that pissed me off last season, I thought we were over this by this point.

And don’t you look at that, in the second fight the Ignite Module doesn’t work anymore, and suddenly the girls are way weaker than the enemies, and now Elfneim will have to spend time trying to make something THAT IS ABLE TO STAND AGAINST NUCLEAR FUSION instead of making LiNKER so the whole team can fight this treat together.

You know, I was excited about the Faust Robe thing, I liked Carol’s last season, why wouldn’t I like it now? WELL, I’M NOT GONNA LIKE THIS SHIT NOW BECAUSE THEY’RE USING IT AS SOMETHING SO OVERPOWERED THAT A FINAL BOSS COULD BE USING IN THE CLIMAX OF THE SEASON, IS LIKE TRYING TO BEAT THE POKÉMON LEAGUE WITH A MAGIKARP THAT ONLY KNOWS SPLASH. FOR GOD’S SAKE.

At least the guy gets naked when he’s practically making a small sun on his hand, I think I’d be even more upset if they didn’t, seeing how they don’t think twice before sexualizing any of the girls. So I guess that’s a positive.

The ex-FIS team also did pretty well this time, probably the only time I wasn’t scratching my head or upset at this one.

I kinda want to continue watching so that I won’t go to sleep with such a bitter taste in my mouth, but I’m sleep depraved and I need my bed more than anything right now so I’ll be going.

I wonder if I bite my hand I’ll get some sweetness from it since humans are kinda like the tomatoes from that old woman? 🤔

[itsthejuggernautbitch]

Suggestion: Colossus losing his v-card to reader. Thank -Xx

Y’all don’t know yet how much I love v-card asks. Y’all bout to find out.

(You’re the best, Kaccey.)

You’re more than a bit surprised when Colossus tells you he’s never been with anyone. You just assumed that there were probably people begging to get down on their knees for him. You certainly were (but discreetly, in that way that says I’m-not-desperate-I-swear-but-please-fuck-me).

Your immediate reaction to his admission is well, hell, I can do something about that if you want. But you don’t say that, because that would be presumptuous, and you’re nothing if not completely considerate. Probably.

What’s the next best thing to say? Please let me fix that for you? No, adding please onto basically the same sentence you just thought is still kind of presumptuous and maybe overeager, but it also kind of sounds like you’re begging (and you don’t know yet if he likes that).

Why? Eh, he probably doesn’t want to talk about that.

You settle on the understanding option. “Just tell me when you’re ready, or if you’re ready.”

He doesn’t respond, and for a minute there you think you might have broken him. You’re not so good at the emotional health thing - you leave that up to him. Maybe the understanding option wasn’t great either? Sex is a pretty big step, especially for a first time. 

Is there really ever a great time to do this? Not when you’re both mutants, probably. It’s hard enough to find time to spend together, being that you’re both gone on missions for long periods of time. Well, you are anyway. Now that Colossus is a teacher, he’s home pretty much permanently unless he’s dealing with local threats. You’re still being sent here, there, and yonder to beat people up.

Sex just adds a new step to something already delicate. Would he sleep in your room? No, you’d probably have to sleep in his. You’re pretty sure you’re sitting on a custom-sized bed, and you have a feeling there’s an equally custom shower in his bathroom. Does he like what you like? You have no idea where to go from here because you’ve never had a relationship with someone you actually like. 

Until you met Colossus.

And you really like Colossus.

“I’m ready,” he says confidently, hopefully. 

Your heart might have stopped for a minute there. He looks a little concerned. You should probably respond to him, but you can’t think of how. Oh, you really want to kiss him.

You haven’t even thought about how this is going to work physically, at least not from a practical standpoint (no, you’ve definitely thought about getting physical with Colossus theoretically, usually alone by yourself at night). He’s large. You, not so much. Whatever he’s packing is likely to be very much proportionate to all seven feet of steel and rippling muscles.

“Right now?” you ask. So eloquent. Not at all overeager.

To be fair, it’s gotten pretty late in the evening. You’ve been up talking for about an hour, stealing the occasional smooch from him. If there’s any time to be eager about maybe, possibly, fucking him for the first time, now’s the time. Door’s locked, no kids up to bother you, no one else in the mansion in need of anything important. Good, quiet alone time.

“I would like that, yes,” he says, almost quietly. He sounds nervous. Is he blushing? Is that what that little sparkly glimmer on his cheeks is? God, you hope so. That’s adorable.

“Are you sure?” you ask, because that’s the adult thing to ask. You really fucking hope he’s sure.

“Yes,” he replies. You could almost cry from excitement. “I have thought about it often, lately. I want this if you do.”

Your insides feel kind of fizzy, like little bubbles of excitement popping in your belly. “You can always tell me to stop if you-”

Colossus tucks his fingers under your chin and lifts your mouth up to his, as if he’s about to lean down and kiss you. You know he is. You really, really fucking want him to kiss you right now. “I do not think I will be telling you to stop, but I know that you are considerate of my boundaries. I thank you for that.”

Your heart melts a little bit. You think this is what love might feel like. That, or nervous indigestion. But most likely that’s love.

“Now if you would, please, tell me what to do for you,” he says.

This is too much talking for something that, for you, only requires hands and teeth and skin on skin. You don’t have a lot of demands here. You would kind of prefer if he told you what he wanted to try.

“Just kiss me and I’ll take care of the rest,” you say.

The interesting thing about Colossus, you’ve found, is that while he looks like solid steel, when he’s not about to beat somebody’s ass his skin is actually quite soft. Like normal human skin, just a little shiny.

That being said, his lips are perfectly soft against yours. You grab his shoulders, and it’s nothing but the feel of sculpted muscle stretching under pliant skin. You run your hands up his throat to his face and take each of his cheeks into your hands. Soft, fun cheeks - perfect for pinching or kissing or whatever he lets you do to him.

You’ve got a list. It’s gonna take a while to get through.

You pull at his inconveniently leather uniform and manage to get the top part off of him. You’re going to have to let him get the bottoms off himself, but you certainly don’t mind watching him do that. No need to leave him half-naked all by his lonesome self; you tug your shirt over your head and toss it aside.

He hasn’t touched you much yet. You figure that he’s probably pretty nervous; he doesn’t quite know what your boundaries are yet (hint: you don’t have them). You take his hands and clasp them over your bare chest.

“Have fun,” you say, and then you get right back to kissing him.

He’s not quite sure what to do with that, but hey, the beauty of natural instinct is that it doesn’t take long for him to figure it out. He runs his hands over your chest, palms brushing your nipples, fingers searching and prodding. He takes one nipple between his fingers and rolls it around, pulling a sharp gasp from you.

While his hands on your breasts feel fan-fucking-tastic, you’re not patient at all. Why would you be? Have you looked at him? You need to get your pants off right now because he still hasn’t even really touched you yet and your cunt already aches. Which means you also need to get his ridiculous leather uniform pants off of him, but he’s going to have to do that himself. So, you all but beg him to take his pants off.

(You’re a horny sack of pathetic right now, but you don’t care because you really fucking like him and this is going to be awesome even if he’s a little awkward.)

He slides those pants of slowly (you’re pretty sure he’s picked up on what you like already). You’re left with a very naked, very sparkly, and very proportionate Colossus. Your pants follow his onto the floor because why the fuck wouldn’t they?

You climb into his lap and straddle him, kissing him again. His cock is hard against your thigh, his hands on your hips. You take one of his hands and guide it down towards your cunt.

“You’ve got some work to do if we’re going to make you fit,” you say, taking him in your hand.

You stroke him gently, your fingers barely a whisper against his skin. He bites his lip watching your fist move, his cheeks glimmering in the light. He still hasn’t moved his hand, which you badly need him to do, so you coax one of his fingers to your clit.

“Please, Colossus,” you say. You realize that you sound like you’re going to die if he doesn’t move a little faster. To be fair, you might.

He traces your clit with his finger, dipping in and out to spread your wetness around. It tickles, actually, and makes you ache. Your clit throbs with with need for pressure; you rut against his hand to relieve some of that need.

“Take it slow,” he says, sliding home the finger that’s been tracing your clit. His fingers aren’t exactly small, so it burns, but you keep rutting against his hand despite his insistence for you to slow down.

“Sorry… just a little…excited,” you reply, biting back moan.

You pump your fist, squeezing the tip of his cock. He looks like he’s going to bite his lip off, but he’s quiet. You haven’t heard him moan or whine or anything. Such control - you’re going to test it.

He slides a second finger in, his thumb pressing down on your clit. There’s pressure building in your abdomen, and you don’t want to come before you’ve even really gotten started, but fuck you like what his fingers are doing.

Nevertheless, you grab his wrist to get him to stop. “That should be - enough. I don’t want to come before I make you come.”

“What do you want me to do?” he asks. There he goes, trying to do something to please you and take care of you. That’s going to be a fantastic quality the longer you’re together, but right now, you’re taking care of him.

“Just give me a little bit of leverage,” you reply, holding his shoulders. “You’re a big guy, darlin’. It’s going to take me just a minute.”

“I - uh, s-sorry,” he says, holding on to your hips. You’re gonna put his hands back on your breasts in a second. Those fingers have got to get back to work.

“The last thing you should be doing it apologizing.”

You sink down on him, letting your body adjust. He sighs as you close in around him, yet stays completely still as if he’s afraid he’s going to break you. Granted, he could, but he’s so gentle that he won’t, despite his size. He’s holding onto your hips and you’re going to have some bruises from his hands, but that’s kind of a thing for you so it’s okay.

You roll your hips, lifting yourself up and sinking back down on him. His breathing is deep and he’s holding back a groan; you can feel his chest tighten as he tries to hold it in. You need for him to get loud.

You clench down on him, and he all but growls. Now, where the fuck did that come from? You need him to make that noise again. He jerks his hips - the first time he’s moved inside of you - and you’re almost unseated, but he holds you steady. Ah, so you’ve found a break in his control. You clench down again and he bites his lip, but he doesn’t jerk his hips again.

You pick up the pace because as fun as it is to test his control, he’s getting close and you are too. He runs his hands up your back, your hips, your breasts, and kisses you, pulling you against his chest. He thrusts up into you, hips stuttering, breath trembling.

“I need to-” his voice is close to your ear, low and broken and straining for control.

“I do, too,” you say, squeezing his thighs. “Come for me, baby.”

He kisses you again and groans, thrusting up into you with only the barest sense of rhythm. You’re right there with him, clenching down around him as you come.

Once he’s done, he helps lift you out of his lap. You lay down on his bed, brain still fuzzy, and snuggle up next to him. He’s so warm and soft; you won’t need a blanket if you stay in bed with him for the rest of the night. You’d like to do that.

“Do you want to shower?” Colossus asks, rubbing your back gently.

“With me?” he clarifies quickly, as if you didn’t fucking know he meant with him.

Well, you’re not going to say no to that. You jump up far too quickly for someone who just rode a man aptly named Colossus. You can feel the soreness in your thighs; you’re quite aware that you’re going to be walking a little funny for a day or so.

You grab his hands and pull him up off the bed. “You’re going to have to help scrub me down.”

[noexit-ff]

32.

Robyn and Mel are taking forever, I waiting outside Mel’ apartment complex and Robyn said she will be back, she will get Mel out. It’s been twenty minutes. Robyn is going to Mel’ scan, finding out the gender and then Robyn’ has her scan. She woke up me up so early, Mel’ appointment had to be at nine, we have to go to two different places, Mel is having her baby at some different hospital. I am dying in this hot ass car and my wife is just taking forever, since being back Robyn has been trying her hardest. She has been cooking a lot, rushing around me. I am still telling her how upset I am with her, but I am still upset with her. I am not going to be mean to my wife, like Ant said give her the cold shoulder but that failed. I went to sleep in the spare room and I woke up to Robyn in the bed so it failed, she scolded me and cried and I was like I forgive you but I am annoyed, she been good though, I can’t fault her. I am actually so happy to be back in LA, just to be out of New York and the bullshit. I just need to figure out what I am doing with myself in regards to my dad, my mom saw us and everything was good but it’s there. And I was like mom please don’t, he deserves nothing but then if he did die and I never helped in any way that would play on my mind. My dad did text me and apologised for trying to attack me that time, I ignored him. I don’t think I want the man to see my child but I got feeling that it will happen. Why do I have to have a heart, fuck my life.

Resting my head back on the head rest, preparing for a baby is hard work. Shit like scans come by so quickly, fitting in the party and then my tour overseas. Robyn can’t travel, I mean she can but I won’t let her come this time, we just need to deal with it if anything happens. I need to make sure she is good though, I am just getting the dates over with and then I can come back home. Robyn refuses to do anything in regards to buying baby clothes, doing the room up or even shopping for herself, she wants me around all of the time but she needs to learn. I think I will get Monica to come and look after her daughter, that will make Robyn do things. Sighing out, finally they are both walking out. It’s ok when Robyn is hot, she would cuss my ass out for leaving her outside. Robyn does look so pretty though, now that she can dress how she likes, my wife looks so beautiful. Putting the car engine on, I feel my skin melting into the seat “sorry, Mel didn’t drink enough water so she was gulping it down” stupid excuse but it’s whatever “oh god, I forgot my bottle of water. Can you buy me another” Robyn slammed the car door shut “ok superwoman, no need to bang the door. Hi Mel” I actually need to be somewhere but Robyn is taking her sweet time “I need to be somewhere so we can’t be all day” driving off slowly “where is that exactly?” Robyn questioned “I told you already, I need to see a man about the party. I told you that we are doing it at Disneyland, but obviously it’s going to be an early thing and it costs” now Robyn needs to understand why I need to earn “but we can do it at the home Chris?” shaking my head “come on Robyn, this is us. Chris Brown and Rihanna, we need to do it big. People are watching, we didn’t have a big wedding so I want to have a big gender party or whatever you call it” we can do it for our first child, fuck everyone else’s party they won’t compare to ours.

I don’t know why Mel didn’t do what we did, the hospital seems a little tacky which is odd because I know she got money unless she is saving “thank you for bringing me Chris” Mel said from across me in the waiting room “I know you don’t have to do this or bring me here” clearing my throat “it’s cool, I don’t mind. I am excited to know what you are having, I hope it’s a girl so our kids can be besties. Growing up together and shit, it will be dope” I feel like I should have bought my bodyguard, people are lowkey taking pictures, I can see them “Melissa Forde” a lady walked in announcing “good luck” I said to Mel, Robyn kissed my cheek before getting up “you’re so good” she touched my cheek smiling, sighing out sitting back. I guess this is going to be long a wait, let me call Ant back because he did call me. Tapping Ant’ name, pressing the phone to my ear. I hope he picks up because I need someone to talk too “I called you last night and you call me back now?” Ant said sounding half asleep “well if I am awake then so are you, what do you want?” if he is asleep then that means no money is being made “I called you because The Game called me, he lost your number. He wants a feature, I thought you could have come out last night but you didn’t answer me” rubbing my chin “I was at home, just watching a movie with the wife” Ant let out an oh “I guess cold shoulder shit not working?” I chuckled “nope, she is being so good to me. Been making all the good food for me, and then she was like let’s watch a movie. And we just spent some time together, I mean I can do it tonight. I need to see Pedro about the party and then I am pretty much free” seeing the couple move seats just to sit across me, so annoying “you doing Disneyland party? You got money nigga, how many times” taking in a deep breath “well we didn’t have a big wedding so this is going to be big, I can’t tell you what I have in mind but I need you to do me a little favour. You know Melissa, Rihana’ friend. I am bringing her on the Black Pyramid team, I need you to sort it out for me. I am going away after today so can you do it? I will give you her number, just call her and set up a meeting. I know she has ideas, she good like that” Ant has no choice in this “fine nigga, but about the overseas tour. What do you think to Stadiums?” pulling a face “for what?” I retorted, Ant laughed “listen to me, you’re Chris Brown. Instead of going arena, go stadium. You trust me don’t you?” Ant and these big ideas “I do but if shit don’t sell out, I will be angry?” I probably will cancel “it won’t nigga, it’s you! Just leave it to me, we doing Stadiums” this nigga is crazy.

Staring at this couple and they are straight up staring at me in shock, I swear to god this is terrible “can I take a picture with you?” half hour later and she asks, took her time “honestly?” I said “no, this is my time and I rather not be taking pictures. No disrespect but I just rather not” the lady let out an oh “what is your name?” I asked “Leila and this is my brother Jamal” I thought that was her man “cool, I am Chris. I didn’t want to be here but when your wife drags you out and wakes you up early I ain’t got the choice” her brother busted out laughing “you lucky, you got Rihanna as a wife. You know how many guys want that?” widening my eyes “well if you can deal with her hormones and kicking you while she sleeps, you can have her. I am joking but Rihanna is just a typical woman, she be driving a nigga crazy” the siblings both looked at each other “how far along are you?” I pointed at the girl “I am twenty three weeks, my baby daddy got shot and died” letting out an oh “I am sorry to hear” the door opened “we are done now Chris” Robyn said, getting up from the chair “nice meeting y’all, good luck” dapping her brother.

Closing the door behind me “so?” I said, Mel grinned at me “I am having a boy” I gasped “oh wow, a boy. I am happy for you, dammit. I wanted you to have a daughter so it can be called Fantasia” hugging Mel, feeling Mel hit my shoulder “Fantasia? Nigga bye, I would never” I chuckled moving back from the hug “Fenty and Fantasia, perfect” Robyn rolled her eyes at me “he is out here setting up everyone baby names” Robyn motioned me to walk “is everything good though? With the baby?” I didn’t even ask that “oh yes, the baby is fine. The baby boy is fine, I am so overwhelmed” Robyn yanked my arm around her shoulder “can you drop me off home though? Just that Mijo is coming to see me and I need to be home” them two are getting close again “that is nice, I will do that. We will be on time for our scan so it’s fine” I hope I don’t see Mijo again, I just can’t deal with him “the baby is so cute, I said to Mel our baby looks like giant watermelon, there is no bean about it. I am scared now” Robyn said, tapping the elevator button “I wasn’t a fat baby though, I was seven pounds I think. So it’s you, you were the fat baby” Robyn side eyed me “it’s not that, excuse me I have seen your baby picture and your head is swollen as fuck. Your head is big” I know Robyn is not talking about big heads when her head is huge “you will need to do an extra push because of your forehead the baby will have” feeling a slap to my chest, Mel snorted laughing “that hurt” rubbing my chest.

Parking up at the side of the apartment complex “the little bitch is there” Mijo is stood waiting “thank you for dropping me off” Mijo just stared at me “where are you going?” grabbing Robyn’ arm “stay in the car, fuck that nigga” Robyn slowly closed the car door “ok but I wanted to hug my friend” why is he looking at me like he innocent and shit, such a fuck nigga “now where are you going?” Robyn said as I got out of the car “I don’t want trouble Chris, I come to see Mel” Mijo said “or trying to find a place to stay, your baby mother contacted me. It’s weird how they all come to me like I am your carer, you keep it one hundred with Mel. You don’t be trying to get in her panties again, you done enough shit. Congratulations on the baby boy, you don’t deserve shit nigga” I know his game and I don’t like it “I ain’t seen my kids in weeks” I shrugged “I will be seeing them though, have fun” walking around the car.

Another waiting room but this time it is for my baby, I am excited to see bean today “why do you keep staring at me?” I can feel Robyn’ eyes all on me “admiring you, I can’t wait for Bora Bora. I have some things, we can do what we did last time. When we was walking around naked, sex in the bath. I just want to heal us both” moving my head looking at Robyn smiling “I know you do, I do appreciate you making so much effort. I know things are hard for you and me also, things are tense. All eyes are on us, people selling things left, right and centre about us. E News being on baby watch, I see these random photographers following us. It’s going to be difficult for us so I want us to be strong enough to take that shit, I know we can do it. I want to have the biggest and the baddest baby shower, gender thing any nigga done because we can. Shit is going to be dope, I am going to get Pedro to sort this out for us. Fireworks which is either pink or blue and that will let us now, make it themed. You know I am childish and I want it there. Make memories, we didn’t have a big wedding babe so this is what I want us to do” Robyn stared at me in awe “I am so excited for this, I love the idea. Big enough to hold our family and friends too, I can’t wait. We do need this time away and then we can start, private time for us” placing my arm around Robyn “Robyn Brown, would you like to come through” finally we can go in.

Shaking Sarah’ hand “good to see you both, how are you mother?” the doctor asked, sitting down in the chair “great, erm I feel more active. I mean at times I get the feeling like I don’t want certain things like sex, then I feel ugly. Then I want to argue, I have started many of arguments, poor Chris. Then I also feel nausea a lot, Chris is always there for me though. I couldn’t have done it without him, he supports me so much. He is a great husband to me and very loving, back massages I get from him even though he is angry at me but then he thinks of the baby and doesn’t let the baby suffer from my stupid mouth” Robyn gushed, I chuckled she got me blushing here “awww see, the hormones are kicking in. Sorry husband, you’re going to get it. I am sure baby Brown will appreciate it, there is no special remedy to help you with this Chris. You need to deal with it, it shall pass” smiling at Robyn, she is annoyingly cute but that is my baby “I am trying but when she is over it I am still on it” holding Robyn’ hand.

I can’t wait to see Bean “so we will find out about any deformations with the baby, if the baby will have any issues like down syndrome so this is important to check. I will show you the baby and we can check what is happening” I want Sarah to hurry up, I want to see the baby. I am stood up for this, I am just so damn excited “so let’s see if we can find baby Brown, look at that. You cannot miss it” my eyes widened “oh wow, that is a full grown baby now. Damn, it’s legs. Look” I am so amazed, my smile grew seeing my baby in Robyn’ stomach just living “I can see it’s heart beating” the white flutter “yes, I am just measuring the heartbeat. So you are twelve weeks and four days” the doctor said, looking at Robyn “look at your smile Chris, not seen you so happy like this in a while” Robyn sighed out saying “baby heart beat is one hundred forty six beats per second, very healthy” that is my baby right there, strong and healthy “oh someone is kicking” I chuckled seeing bean just moving it’s legs “mommy won’t like it when you’re fully grown” my baby is just doing the most, no wonder Robyn’ hormones are everywhere at times, she has to deal with the dancer in her stomach.

I can’t believe how big our baby is “oh my god, it’s arms!?” I spat “yes, this is the top of the baby’ head so we are looking down at it. And yes, it’s doing it’s little moves” that is crazy, shaking my head “it’s weird because I can feel it a lot, I can feel it moving so much and I am like stop. Especially when I laying down and resting, it’s like the baby comes out to play. I can feel it react a lot when Chris is poking my stomach” Robyn never says “can you tell the sex of the baby now or no?” I questioned, the doctor paused “well, I have a thought on it. I am not one hundred percent so I am not saying, at twenty weeks I can but I am not going to tell you what I assume until I know fully” letting out an oh “I really hope it is a girl” I want a daughter “I think it will suit you Chris, a daughter but I can’t say but I can say your baby is fine. Nothing to state it will have any serious illness, no down syndrome. The baby is having fun in the stomach, it is time to start buying things. Baby names, birthing classes are good but you can wait for after the next scan. I don’t need to see you until twenty weeks but you can always come sooner, you both have got pass the worst part and I can say your baby is fine” Robyn sniffled “thank you so much” Robyn held her hand “I thought this would never happen to me, thank you” the doctor cooed out “it is happening, I am very happy for you. Just do what you are doing, and Chris continue to support Robyn. You are doing a great job too” that is sweet to hear.

Shaking Pedro’ hand, Robyn decided she wanted to come with me and I let her. I am so damn happy, my baby is ok and we doing good “good to see you both this time, married. The Disney magic worked” his gay ass, he shook Robyn’ hand “thank you, the whole Disney thing was good and I appreciate it” Robyn said as she sat down “and we have a baby out of it, look at god but what can I do for you my old friend” Pedro said to me “erm well, it’s a big ask and money but I don’t care, just make it happen for me. So we are having a baby shower, gender reveal party and I want it here. It’s going to be family and friends and friends will be celebrity’s of course. I need it to be like what I had with the engagement but I want more of the park, I don’t want it late, it will be afternoon. I want the full works, the characters and I want fireworks which will show either boy or girl with it being pink or blue. I want full catering, the whole nine. I know you can make this happen for me, don’t give me this look” Pedro is looking like I am asking for blood “so Chris Brown and Rihanna, ok wait. Chris and Robyn Brown baby shower, here at Disney. And you say don’t think about the money right?” nodding my head “you want us to do everything, the theme. I have an idea, I will need to speak to my bosses. Means closing the park, I mean some of it which won’t be difficult because the money we make will cover it. Right, I will let you know but I don’t see them saying no. I can’t wait for the child to be born, you will get them a Disney party. Lucky child” Pedro said, I grinned at him “you already know and I will come to you” our child is going to get the world I can’t wait.

Today has been a success, I am very happy with everything “is your friend broke? I am mean Mel that is” I wanted to ask Robyn this “erm no, not really why?” seeing Sinko has called me “because why she in a place like that? I know she can afford private, or maybe not” I will call him back after this conversation, slowly driving off “I don’t know, the apartment costs a lot in rent but she does have money. I would never let her go broke” I think there is something weird about it “well Ant is going to sort the Black Pyramid role out for her, she will be on the pay role. I think there is something weird going on with her” there is something “she is giving money to Mijo and they are together” Robyn blurted out, my eyes bulged out “ok that came out but I found out just last night, she said to not tell you but he apologised. I am not happy but what can I say? Look, forget them. It’s about us” is Mel a fucking dumb bitch “I won’t be rude but I don’t want him in my life, I will un-invite Mel to events. Your friend is stupid, that is all I am saying” I won’t say more because that is her best friend “don’t come to me when Mijo kicks her to the curb, he is only with her because he is trying to get at me. He wants to be my friend again but no, his intentions are not pure” Mel is so stupid.

[sagestoneandsea]

Mountains to Climb 11/13/17

Listen up y’all cuz this is it, the weekend that I had was de-li-cious. (If you get that reference, bless you) 

This last weekend I went on a mountain getaway with ‘C’. At the beginning of the month I just put it out there that I had the weekend off and though a mountain trip would be dope. I was just testing the waters with that statment, thought ‘C’ would say ‘Yeah that’d be cool but not going to happen’ because what man would want to spend the weekend with me ALONE. I didn’t think it was going to happen. Hopeful but not holding my breath. When I told ‘C’ he said something along the lines of “yeah that would be really cool!” And that was kind of it. Fine by me! I didn’t think it was going to happen anyway. Fast forward a few days, he brings it up, and at this point, it was long out of my mind, ya know, ‘Nice thought but better luck next time’ sort of deal. BUT NAH Y’ALL the dude was actually wanting to go to the mountains for the weekend with ME! Next thing I know he already has a hotel booked (!!!!) and had already scoped out cool eating places. (WHAT?!?) 

Fast forward a week, we are on the road driving to Canmore ( My favourite place in the WORLD). Side note: I should point out I am a nervous driver( along with many other things). ‘C’ is driving in the dark and really bad fog as well. DING DING DING internal freak out commence. I was very nervous but was also playing it cool because I didn’t want to make him worried. Spoiler, we survived. 

We got to the hotel, had sex, grab some food, then head back to snooze it up. Something you should know about me. I am not good at sleeping in places that I do not know, I also have a weird thing where I won’t fall asleep unless I know someone is still up ( In case there is a murderer, I won’t get killed, because someone is still up and thus I am safe from monsters and murderers, DUH) and ‘C’ can fall asleep any where, any time. This drives me CRAZY because what about the monsters and murderers. They will leave him because he essentially looks dead and can sleep through anything, and JUST KILL ME.  I have a  solution that is so perfect and unflawed: I listen to audiobooks: ‘someone’ is still awake (because I hear the audiobook being read out-loud) so if murderers or monsters wanted to get me, they wouldn’t because of said audiobook listening.* Remember this weird thing for later*

Amazingly I was able to sleep threw the night, and, was not murdered. Total bonus. I wake up, annoy ‘C’ with my peppy morning mountain excitement, (little did he know my obsession for the mountains is INSAIN) and begin to try and get this boy up and out of bed. That didn’t work as well as I wanted it to. I ‘somehow’ ended up back in bed, naked, and, well, we stayed in bed for another few hours. When we finally got up, we ‘of course’ had to shower (I didn’t have to, I just like looking at ‘C’s’ cute lil’ bum). When we finally got ready we went on a beautiful walk that was right outside our hotel.  We then went to a odd little restaurant with books and bells. YOU GUYS I am not weird about eating in front of him. DO YOU KNOW HOW BIG THAT IS FOR ME?! 

After eating we went into Banff and rode the gondola and wondered around sulphur mountain. HOLLY COW the view was beautiful. After that we went for a lovely dinner at a place we just stumbled upon. The food was great, drinks, v good, but the company was the best part. We laughed all night. We drove back to our hotel watched a part of a movie, and fell asleep. Well ‘C’ did. My mind was racing. Im not sure if it was because we were in a different bed, that I had had a few drinks or if it was the beautiful day we had but I could not turn my mind off for one second. It was going a thousand miles a min thinking of all the ways this thing, this relationship could go wrong. I didn’t want to let it fester, so I woke ‘C’ up and told him what I was thinking and how I was feeling. I was feeling very uncomfortable and venerable telling him this stuff, only to find out he was sleeping: the snoring had started back up. I was feeling deflated, so I decided to put on my audiobook to try and drown out my thoughts. DIDN’T WORK. I decided to do the only other logical thing I could think of. Pull ‘C’ in to cuddle with me. I started to drift when ‘C’ freaked out, half asleep, got out of bed, then got back in, cocooned himself, and faced the other way. Well fuck, now my mind is racing even more than before. I eventually sulked myself to sleep. 

The next morning (Sunday) I was feeling a little bit of doubt in this thing. like ‘It’s not going to last long, maybe you should brake it off’ ‘There’s no way he loves you back, he’s just using you’ ‘Why would he want to spend a weekend with you, he probably has other motives’. To say the least, this kind of self talk and thoughts do not make one feel the best. But ‘C’ was still sleeping and I didn’t want to tell him what I was thinking, because if I tell him, then its true right? That is all he needs to say ‘Oh yeah thanks for the reminder, you are totally right! I’m super not into this, lol BYEE’. So I pushed it to the back of my brain, woke up sleeping beauty, had a shower, had REALLY good sex, briefly talked about what I was feeling (But using me instead of him because I can control what I do, ya know?) and went about our day. 

This day (in the beginning) was probably one of the weirdest for me. I was always thinking about what had kept me up the previous night, and we decided to go to the hot springs. Now I had not been in a bathing suit in a LONG time. What, ya girl was fat, it was socially unacceptable ( I thought) to be in public in a bathing suit. ‘C’ really wanted to go and I didn’t want to say no.  To make maters worse it was extremely busy. I walked into the change room with my 12 year old self tagging along too. I was feeling shy, self conscious about being in a bathing suit, I didn’t want ‘C’ to see me in a bathing suit ( Crazy because he has seen me NAKED, doesn’t make sense at all WEIRDO BRAIN), and I didn’t want to be surrounded by strangers.  I made my way to the showers and gave myself a little pep talk. ‘YOU CAN TO IT HOT STUFF!”  I worked up the courage and walked out into the hot springs. Oh gosh. There were so many people there that I wanted to turn back in and leave right away. 

Thankfully I was out there before ‘C’ so I quickly found a place near the wall and made myself as small as possible. I didn’t want to be scene. ‘C’ came out and came over to me with a big smile. He was so happy to be in the hot springs. He wanted me to go into the middle of the pool with him. Is he CRAZY?! HELL NO. I was sooooooo unbelievably self conscious that I wanted to cry. I wanted to stay on the edge where no one could see me and I could shrink away into a little nothing and float away. AND to top it all off my fucking mascara gives me racoon eyes. Fucking prime. We stay in there a little while longer until ‘C’ says he’s ready to go. I leave the poor boy to gather his things while I book it back to the change room. FEEEUUWW its over. The water was lovely, the company was lovely, but I would have much rather enjoyed a bath together or something like that. 

We go for a funny little dinner and this sweet little place.  We have lobster for dinner, chocolate fondue for dessert, and lots of laughs and sweet moments in between. My shield from the day finally begins to go down. I start to feel more relaxed and open. We end the meal with wondering a few shops where ‘C’ buys me a fucking rock neckless that is beautiful. I tell him he doesn’t have to but he says he wants to, so I let him pick one out for me. This act of kindness really made me fall for this guy. No one has ever done that for me, That made all the worries go away, because you don’t buy someone a piece of jewellery that you plan on breaking up with. I was in love with him for the rest of the night, the ride home, and fell asleep with happy thoughts. 

Maybe I just need to be more open with him about what I am actually feeling. I have noticed that whenever it comes to real emotions, how I’m really feeling, I tend to brush it off and not tell him, because if I tell him, he could realize what he got himself into and dip. 

ANYWHO this was one of the most romantic weekends I have ever been on an I really hope ‘C’ sticks around for a little bit longer until I can unwrap my heart a little bit more so he can see how fully I love. I really hope that will happen. 

SIDE NOTE: I binged today. Why do I do this. Every time I remind myself how much I hate it, its never as good as I think it will be, AND YET i still fucking do it. Ya girls becoming a fat lil piggy and I hate it. Probably plays a big part in why I think ‘C’ will leave. Thanks body dysmorphia for raging its fat head back into my life. On a happy note: I got a cute lil hair cut. 

Cheers form the wined, dined and self defined doubter

Sage,Stone&theSea