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whatifxwereyou · 3 years

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Ashes Chapter 8: Hollywood

Pairing: Liu Kang x Reader

Finally, some air to breathe that isn't from Liu Kang. Maybe a little peace before some angst? But only maybe.

A/N: Had some fun writing Cole Young. Angst everywhere though. Sorry I don't have much to say today. Bad day. Hope you are all doing great though. Sending good vibes all around. Smooches.

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When you’d got tired of the beach you’d gone to the hotel where Liu had told you that the others had been staying while they dealt with Johnny Cage, a B-Movie action star with an ego the size of a washed-up A-list star from twenty years ago.

You’d said goodnight and the next morning you showered and readied yourself for the day. This place was nicer than the motel you’d shared and you had some privacy.

Johnny Cage wasn’t easy to get a hold of, which had been a huge part of the problem. Apparently, they’d had to dance around agents and security and had gotten themselves thrown off of a movie set. Somehow, they had managed to convince him to meet with you the next morning and have an actual conversation about why you were there. You guessed that wasn’t going to go well after all you’d learned.

It also meant that you had some free time, a thing you had grown to hate over the years. Without Kung Lao you were left to your own devices and it almost never went well. Now you had a thousand more horrible things to think about.

You’d stopped Liu that morning after you’d decided you would play tourist. You and Kung Lao had always joked about going to Hollywood and you remembered a few of the places he’d said he’d wanted to see. With your sudden passion for taking photographs, you thought it would appropriate. But Liu was in a mood again and you weren’t about to ask him why.

You’d woken up feeling relatively okay that morning and weren’t about to change that.

If Liu needed to be alone to get out of his mood, then you would let him. Every time he’d been in a mood like that, you had wound up yelling at each other and you were not emotionally prepared to handle his frustration. You were both too volatile.

So, you went sight-seeing. The Hollywood sign had been far less remarkable than you’d expected but you took pictures anyway. The La Brea Tarpits had been nice but you wished you hadn’t been alone. You’d tried to think of how Kung Lao would have reacted but it only served to make you sad. You supposed that alone was your new state of being and you’d have to get used to it. There had been a time where alone was all you’d known, and you had been more than comfortable with it.

It would take a long time to get back to that if you ever managed to. You took to imagining that maybe you would show these pictures to Kung Lao someday. You knew that wasn’t possible, but he would have wanted to see them and hear all about your adventures. That was heartbreaking in and of itself, but it did give you a new purpose as you traveled throughout Hollywood. It wasn’t often that you got to play tourist in new places. you had always talked about going there together just to see the Chinese Theater and the Walk of Fame. He’d wanted to take a picture with Bruce Lee’s star.

Then you sat and people watched on Hollywood Boulevard, wondering what their lives must be like. Some were obvious tourists. You liked to think that their visiting the Walk of Fame was a fulfillment of a lifelong dream. Others were on their way to work or just living their lives, not bothering with the star-studded walkway as though it were nothing more than a gateway from where they were to where they were going. None of them were wrong but it was nice to focus on the lives of others rather than the mess that was yours.

You browsed through the photos that you’d taken that morning. You’d asked a stranger to take a picture of you next to Bruce Lee’s star and smiled at the photograph. Kung Lao would have loved that.

You’d both been fans of old martial arts films and no one was more iconic than Bruce Lee.

After dating for a few months, you and Kung Lao had taken to sneaking out to the closest towns and renting rooms in motels and inns just so you could watch those movies together. You’d continued that tradition throughout the entirety of your relationship up until the last six months. Things had gotten sticky and confusing then. You’d both been busy and had fought more than usual. You’d been thinking about suggesting a weekend away after you’d gotten back from your trip so that you could touch base and figure things out.

So much for that.

You should have suggested it earlier.

The past was the past, you reminded yourself.

You couldn’t let it get to you no matter how it felt like a dagger twisting in your chest each time you thought about what you should have done. Rubbing your sore and tired eyes, you put the phone into your bag and closed your eyes, listening to the monotony of humanity passing by.

In one of those hotels was where you and Kung Lao had your first time. You’d been watching Enter the Dragon, discussing the importance of the role, and your experiences first seeing the movie in your childhood. You still remembered how his lips felt- soft and sticky, sweet and fermented with the flavor of the plum wine you’d been sharing.

You’d ignored the movie and made out instead, like giddy teenagers. You’d been the one to push him further. Kung Lao had asked you if you were certain which had been sweet. It had broken the floodgates.

He had certainly tried before then- many times. He’d never been subtle about it and he’d never pushed you beyond your limit though he did try to push his luck. When you told him no, he always listened and had never once made you feel guilty about it. You had been grateful for his patience then. Holding your head in your hands you sighed.

Even your fondest memories of him were tainted with sadness. You wondered if there would ever only be fondness and no sorrow attached to thoughts of him. Realistically you knew that there would be but for now it felt improbable. The photos you’d taken that day brought you a little peace. It had been kind of cathartic to do something in Kung Lao’s honor rather than fixating on the only piece of him you had left while drenched in guilt for a thousand different reasons.

Sleeping with his best friend was at the very top of that list.

At least you hadn’t done it while you’d been dating. What a tiny, tiny sad silver lining that was on your sad, shitty story.

“Y/N? Is that you?” An unfamiliar voice called your name so you sat alert. That was upsetting. To be called out by a voice you had never heard in the middle of your contemplation. A tall, well-built, handsome man approached you. He had a kind smile and what you could only describe as 90s protagonist hair. “This must be weird. Sorry. I’m Cole Young.” He held his hand out to introduce himself and you shook it but were cautious. As if sensing that you didn’t trust him, he pulled down the collar of his shirt to show you the dragon marking on his chest. That was proof enough.

“Sorry, you startled me. I was lost in my own little world.” You offered for him to take the seat across from you at the table you’d been occupying at a little bistro. You’d bought food but had given it away. Your appetite hadn’t been the best the past few days. Thinking about Kung Lao or Liu Kang for extended periods did away with any hunger you had. “It’s nice to meet you finally. I will be honest and say I haven’t heard much about you. I don’t think many personal stories were swapped with the company I keep. I did hear, however, that you are a nice enough man.”

“That’s the best I can hope for. I didn’t hear much about you either. Raiden showed me what you looked like and I knew you and Liu were supposed to arrive soon.” He took the seat you offered and for a time you swapped pleasantries. He was nice, as advertised, but you hadn’t been expecting socialization so you felt awkward. “What brings you to this part of town, Y/N?” He asked when things fell silent. You’d expected him to say that it had been nice to meet you and go on his way. Instead, he insisted upon more small talk. He seemed bored.

“Doing some sightseeing. Taking some pictures for a friend.” You weren’t sure why you felt the need to justify your motives but you’d been instantly defensive. Liu Kang had made you defensive about everything. Kung Lao would have called you out on it and you smiled at the memory. “What about you?”

“Sightseeing with the family. Allison and Emily are doing some window shopping. I spotted you and was tired of shopping so I figured I’d say hi.” He laughed. Presumably, Allison and Emily were his wife and child. He hadn’t clarified but you’d been told he had family. “Thanks for the escape.” That explained why he’d seemed bored.

“Anytime.” Silence again. You were terrible at conversation right now. You felt outside of yourself. You weren’t ready to talk casually about nothing. “It’s nice to finally meet you. You’re as lovely as everyone said you were. Well, Raiden didn’t use those words exactly but I’ve been around him long enough to understand what he meant.”

“He has a way about him, Raiden.” Cole chuckled, leaning back in his chair. The breeze felt nice and the silence less awkward. “Is the friend you’re taking pictures for Kung Lao?”

You stiffened up and were sure that your expression was suddenly unpleasant. It was too late to hide your gut reaction- tongue over your bottom teeth, lips turned in a frown, eyes closed in frustration. Not an attractive look and definitely not one that would disguise how off guard you’d been taken by the question and how inappropriately personal it was.

He’d known Kung Lao too. The scar on his arm was from his hat. You’d been told in detail much of Kung Lao’s last few days thanks to Raiden.

“Too personal??” Cole winced apologetically.

“It’s okay.”

“He seemed like the kind of guy who would enjoy this.”

“He was. And yes, I was taking pictures for him. He would have wanted to see it.” He would have wanted to be there with you was what you meant, but you were sure Cole got that. He seemed like a smart enough guy. He nodded and silence fell again.

“I’m sorry.” He was avoiding your eyes this time.

“For what?”

“I feel responsible. He was protecting me. He was safe. Gone. He came back to protect me.” Cole had proven to you quickly that he was, in fact, a good man.

“No, Cole.” You scooted to the end of your seat. “Kung Lao made a choice to protect you. He wouldn’t want you to take the blame for what happened.”

“Liu Kang said the same thing.”

“I’m not surprised.” Exhaustion washed over you like a cold wave, tingling down your spine. Grief weighed heavily on your shoulders.

“How are you holding up? With all of this?” Cole gestured to nothing in particular. “It’s not easy to get back to normal after this. Even for me.”

“You seem like a nice guy, Cole, but I don’t know you and this is a very intimate conversation you’ve started.” You began to let him down gently. You weren’t comfortable talking about this with people you’d known for years so you definitely weren’t comfortable talking to a complete stranger about it.

“I get it. I just… wanted to check in.”

“I’m okay.” You assured him and when he didn’t seem to believe you, you smiled and continued. “I’ll be honest and vague. I’ll tell you what I tell everyone who asks me about it. It doesn’t get easier. I carry it better some days than others. People keep telling me that time brings distance but I’m not there yet. Despite that, I’m okay. Really.”

“I’m sorry.” He really did seem like a nice guy. “It’s hard to lose someone you care about.”

“It is.” You weren’t going to talk about it with him. You didn’t want to talk about it with anyone. You were tired of thinking about it. You thought about it constantly. “Can you fill me in on what’s going on with this actor?” A change of subject had to help.

“Oh, yeah.” Cole rolled his eyes and you laughed in surprise. “The only reason he’s even agreed to meet with us is because Sonya pinned one of his bodyguards when he tried to have us removed. He had a very brief conversation with us that was mostly inappropriate comments at Sonya’s expense. When I tried to explain to him what the dragon mark meant he said something about being a weird pitch for a movie. Still, he’s agreed to meet with us again so that’s something.” Cole sighed as though this had been a long and frustrating process. “I’m hoping that Liu can be more convincing. His arcana is impressive and might get him listening.”

“He’s good at that.” You considered that he hadn’t been over the last week. “I can help if need be. I can make a pretty dramatic first impression if I need to.”

“No one told me about your arcana.” Cole rested his elbows on his knees, hands clasped together. This was a much more comfortable and relaxed conversation. Far less awkward, thankfully. “I asked Liu this morning when I ran into him but he was touchy when I brought it up.”

“Not surprised by that.”

“Yeah?” Cole’s curiosity was funny. You were reminded of a few of your monk friends back at Raiden’s Temple. When you’d first arrived there had been nothing but gossip. He was just making polite conversation, but it was still a little funny.

“Nothing you need to worry about.”

“What’s your arcana, then?”

“It’s easier to show you. Everyone gets the wrong impression when I tell them. And to show you? I need privacy.” You gestured down the block. “Is that okay?”

“Sure. Allison’s going to call me when they’re done.” Cole stood. You left a tip with the server and then walked with Cole down the street and into an alleyway between shops. You were still at risk of being seen but you would be careful. No one would believe what they saw anyway. “So?”

“Now I just need you to promise not to panic.” You laughed and backed a little bit away from him so you were facing toward the street and could keep an eye out for passersby.

“Why would I panic?”

You decided it was better to just show him than explain. It rarely made sense without showing it off anyway. You stepped back and studied Cole which elicited an eyebrow raise from him. Then you gestured with your index finger from the ground up. You created an ink copy of Cole. He stepped back from it in surprise so you made the clone mimic his movements.

These clones were easy enough to create but, in the beginning, it had been mostly on accident of either Kung Lao or Liu Kang since that was who you had spent the most time with. One of your first fights with Kung Lao had been about how your arcana always became Liu Kang when you panicked. There hadn’t ever been any resolution to it. The mimicked ‘drawings’ as you referred to them behaved in ways that you were familiar with but not knowing Cole, you studied him and copied his current motions.

The drawings drained you faster than creating inanimate objects would which was why you didn’t do it very often. But this trick was easy enough to give Cole an idea of what you could do. He looked to you for affirmation and you nodded. He then readied his stance for a fight so you mimicked him. Then he laughed and jumped from foot to foot and pointed at the ink version of him doing the same. “You can just do that? With anyone?”

“Among other things. This is the trick that freaks people out the most though.”

“So, your arcana is what? Cloning?

“Ink.” You corrected and with a snap of your fingers the drawing was gone and instead you used your forefinger to write his name in Chinese in the air. “It was Liu’s ideas to use it for mimicry. Kung Lao suggested weapons. Both have been pretty useful but keeping up the… for lack of a better word, puppets, is much more work. Liu would make things out of flame and I would mimic it with my ink until one day I accidentally mimicked him.”

“Accidentally?”

“Yeah. I’d gotten so familiar with him during training that instead of the fire, the ink became Liu Kang. After that we focused on drawing more specific things.” You drew a jian with a simple slap of your palms together. The weapons and shadows had once dripped with ink. You’d been using them for years now and so they didn’t look like ink anymore. They looked more like black crystal. “I’m pretty good at it these days.”

“I’d say.” Cole laughed and then pulled his phone from his pocket as if he’d gotten a message. “Well, if Liu can’t convince this guy to take us seriously then you can have him kick his own ass.”

“Guess I’m going to have to watch one of his movies so I can be familiar with him.” Maybe you’d do that tonight at the hotel.

“Hey, Ally and Emily want to grab a bite to eat. Do you want to join us? You’re welcome to.” Cole gestured back out to the street and you followed him. Your instinct was to say no. To go back to your hotel room and isolate yourself but that was your sadness talking. This was an opportunity. A choice. You could go back to your room and wallow in your misery or you could join Cole and his family and get to know them a bit better.

Distance yourself a little from the misery.

“I’d like that.” You decided and Cole smiled brightly.

“Good!” You followed Cole down the street to meet up with his wife and daughter. Every bit of your brain was objecting to the fact that you’d agreed but you knew it was the right thing to do. Kung Lao would have never let you wallow the way that you were. He would have dragged you out of bed and either tried to fix what was bothering you or distract you. There was nothing Kung Lao or anyone could do to fix this but if you at least tried to get out of your head then you might just help yourself.

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apsbicepstraining · 7 years

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5 Actors Who Do The Same WTF Specific Thing In Every Movie

Many actors have a signature form. Tom Cruise loves to pas, Nicolas Cage can never be more than six inches from ardor, and Sylvester Stallone likes to add a brief fart announced to the centre of every word. But those can easily be explained away — by vigour, lunacy, and mouth-full-of-farts, respectively. But no one can explain why the next 5 aces continue using the same bizarrely specific stuffs happen to them in every single movie.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Is Constantly Perturbed About Forgetting His Partner To Leering Shitheads

Arnold Schwarzenegger has returned himself into a glistening cistern of a human, but all those thousands of hours at the gym seem to have obliged him unusually insecure about his house life. In True Lies , he plays a top-secret authority ultra snoop pose as a run-of-the-mill 300 -pound bodybuilding software salesman, but he gets murderously anxious when his ignored partner strives out “adventure” in the form of sleazy employed vehicle salesman Bill Paxton.

20 th Century Fox “Guess your partner likes the confidence that comes from being a total fucking douchebag, bro! “

Then, in Jingle All The Way , Arnold reprises his role as “shitty inept spouse, ” sans being an ultra spy( he’s precisely a regular superhuman whale ), and again gets insanely resentful where reference is finds his wife’s been spend time with a certain popular-with-the-neighborhood-housewives Phil Hartman.

20 th Century Fox “I couldn’t help but notice your stupendous muscles. Well, I simply work out one muscle, and here’s a clue which one: THE PENIS.”

In Total Recall , Arnold’s wife-stealing fears play out in the most frightful direction possible: He experiences out the status of women he thinks is the adoration of his life is actually a double agent who’s secretly with Richter, a villain who embed phony retentions into his intelligence to stir him think he and his wife had a life together.

TriStar Pictures “What are the last five statements you’d ever expect a mortal with my face and hairline to say? No , not ‘THIS HAIRCUT WAS 60 DOLLARS.’ The reaction was ‘YOUR WIFE IS FUCKING ME.'”

All three cuckolders get their comeuppance, though. Arnold expends a vast quantity of CIA resources to illegally stage a escapade to get Paxton to pee-pee his gasps, Hartman goes refusal eggnog thrown on him when he goes full sneak, and in Total Recall , Arnold killed his bogus partner in the pate, says, “CONSIDA DAT A DIVORCE, ” then snaps Richter’s arms off and drops-off the rest of him down an elevator gibe. So in all cases, love triumphed in the end.

Hollywood Will Always, Always Destroy Mads Mikkelsen’s Eyes

Take a look at Mads Mikkelsen’s face. Particularly his eyes.

Sony Pictures Television Now, if you even can, try to tear your eyes away.

They seem all right, as far as seeings start. Nice brown pigment, good spacing and symmetry … no real troubles worth mentioning. And yet for some ground, every filmmaker’s action when they read those seeings is “I must exterminate them at all costs. Cut them out! Ignite them out! Accompanied me the moaning children of Mads Mikkelsen’s eyes so they are unable look upon their father’s ruin !!! “

We … we should probably start explaining.

The veer started in Casino Royale , Mikkelsen’s introduction to the world outside Scandinavia. In that movie, his character’s left gaze is horribly scarred, leaving him weeping blood in moments of high-pitched stress.

Eon Productions We’re talking about the one that had all the coloring carved out of it with a dull fork.

Mads’ gooey eye isn’t a plan extent, or even a setup for one of Bond’s one-liners. Instead, someone was look back Mikkelsen and expected that they fuck up his left attention before filming. And then someone completely different chose the same stuff two movies afterwards in Valhalla Rising . Mikkelsen’s character not only has a wad of joint scalp for a left see in the film, but he is actually announced One Eye.

Scanbox Entertainment Danish pinkeye does not fuck around.

Mikkelsen’s rising star intended his agent had more strength to bargain, so they must have reached a endanger in the movie after that. In The Three Musketeers , his reference is utterly still missing a left eye, but he gets to wear a cool attention patch over it instead of a prosthetic ball sack.

Summit Entertainment “I’m here to talk to you about the Musketeers initiative.”

But instead of slaking their hate of Mikkelsen’s eye, such an affront only formed Hollywood’s anger grow. The Union of Hollywood Theatrical Artists Specifically for Mads Mikkelsen’s Eyes affirmed, and so in Doctor Strange , Mikkelsen’s eyes are two burning embers at the center of eight pounds of makeup.

Marvel Studios In other statements, FABULOUS.

It’s obvious that Hollywood will not rest “until youve” pried those orbs right from Mikkelsen’s head, so Mads built the wise men move to branch out to other media. He became best friends with Metal Gear builder Hideo Kojima and agreed to wizard in his next tournament, Death Stranding . And if you’d like to see the brand-new and interesting direction Kojima is taking Mikkelsen, here’s a screenshot of what his attribute will look like!

Sony Interactive Entertainment You, uh … you got a little something in your …

Keanu Reeves Desires Being Strapped Into A Cyber Chair

Over the course of his movie busines, Keanu Reeves has traveled through time, goes in superman combats with infantries of computer programs, and once helped Sandra Bullock launch a bus in accordance with the arrangements that spat in the very mouth of physics. But the most frequent shenanigan Reeves guides into is finding himself tied to a cybernetic chair.

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He got a taste for it in Johnny Mnemonic , a movie about the 1990 s trying to create a black hole of self-parody. Keanu plays a human flash drive in a futuristic cyber world felt up by a person who is exceedingly, very cynical about humanity’s ability to miniaturize data storage. He enrols the virtual reality via a cyber chair, whereby he gambles the hazards of the over-storage meltdown to … you know what? It’s quite hard to explain Johnny Mnemonic in one paragraph. Reckon the various kinds of cyberpunk you would detest if you were into cyberpunk, and then include a dolphin. Wait … is the fact that it? Holy shit, we did it!

TriStar Pictures In that container behind the chair? That’s the dolphin we were talking about!

Later, Reeves starred in The Matrix , in which most of the planned and interior decides were made up of cyber chairs. Keanu was quickly growing Hollywood’s go-to star for narratives about people whose figures are in chairs but whose minds are absolutely not.

Warner Bros. Pictures Above: The People’s Choice winner for Actor Most Often in Cyber Chairs.

Keanu even manages to find a way to incorporate cyber chairs in movies about sorcery. In Constantine , the entitle attribute has a chair called “The Chair, ” which gives him get views of Lucifer’s son Mammon obtaining the Spear of Destiny. It’s another cinema we shouldn’t try to explain in a paragraph. The item is, he’s a wizard in a macrocosm of supernatural, and Keanu still ascertained a space to shoot his brain into virtual reality while buckled into a chair.

Warner Bros. Pictures “My contract clearly states that my psyche and my organization cannot ever appear in the same scene.”

Keanu doesn’t ever move his knowledge away when he’s strapped into a cyber chair. In The Day The Earth Stood Still , he plays an immigrant referred Klaatu. The tale identifies him tied to an everyday chair and pointlessly covered in sensors by authority agents who had to have been waiting their whole lives to fuck with an immigrant, yet still manage to screw the whole event up.

20 th Century Fox “Does your Earth sensor pick up how disappointing this all is? To everyone? “

The Day The Earth Stood Still signal Keanu’s growth as relevant actors. He substantiated he could get fastened to chairs with less and fewer devices. He disappeared even further in Knock Knock , in which he gets tied to a chair that exclusively includes headphones.

Lionsgate “I SAID! WE’RE BREAKING FOR LUNCH! WE’LL BE BACK IN ABOUT 90 MINUTES! GREAT WORK THIS MORNING, KEANU! “

Reeves lastly “made it” as a fully cyber-free chair actor in the acclaimed act movie John Wick , which has him tied to a chair with perfectly no electric wires or cables. It is attached to zero cyber dolphins and no alternating digital actualities. It was a long and confusing road getting here, but here he is …

Summit Entertainment

… living the reverie!

Jim Carrey Is Forever Plagued By Bugs

Before Jim& Andy documented the full and insufferable penetrations of his self-indulgence, Jim Carrey was a beloved performer known for his goofy overacting and pseudo-philosophical public meltdowns. One repetition topic in Carrey’s achievements, nonetheless, seems to have operated under the radar for years: Namely, that his rubbery face redoubles as a glitch magnet. Let’s start with the hover that crawls across his eyeball in the stupidly premised Yes Man .

Warner Bros. Pictures Yes Man is a movie about a serviceman who can’t say no to concepts! Even flies on his eyeball!

In Me, Myself, And Irene , Jim’s face and mouth get contained within imperfections, and he utterly doesn’t charge. Oddly enough, in Dumb And Dumber , he mentions swallowing a junebug off-camera as a intellect he’s not ravenous. We’re not sure what this makes, but Carrey’s references seem to be the only people who are totally fine with live insects piloting into their lips and eyes. Are all his movies secretly zombie movies? Candyman spinoffs?

20 th Century Fox “Turn out the brightness and say my refer 5 times in your reflect to be informed about! “

Here’s a recreation GIF from How The Grinch Stole Christmas , and we’re beginning to believe this wasn’t even in the dialogue. This is simply what happens when Carrey stops moving his lip for more than five seconds.

Universal Pictures What you are familiar with as Jim Carrey is merely an elastic pocket harbouring the legion of Swarmog, insect mass of Nebulo 8.

The man is comprised and filled with insects in a way that may account for his inhuman gyrations. It doesn’t seem to be limited to the laid, either. He once told a Jimmy Kimmel audience all about the mites that started living in his beard. When the time comes to Jim Carrey, the question isn’t whether or not he has a fault on him; it’s where, how many dozens, and how many eggs they are laying.

“Cut! We’re going to need to fumigate Jim again.”

Leonardo DiCaprio’s Toasts Are Omens Of Destruction

If you don’t weigh dopey comedies committing weddings, you don’t see toasts in very many movies. But when you do, there’s a 90 percentage likelihood Leo DiCaprio is the one dedicating it. Every single filmmaker agrees that the man sounds good delivering a spectacular speech with liquor in his hand.

Here we have the first instance, from Baz Luhrman’s Romeo+ Juliet . DiCaprio makes the “here’s to my love” discussion to what he thinks is his dead sweetheart before downing poison.

20 th Century Fox “So let’s create a glass of Drano to my dead lover. What? She’s not d- ACK! “

Seeing him deliver such a heartfelt addres with poison on hand, James Cameron wanted to see what the teenager could do with real alcohol. So in Titanic , he has Leo deliver a speech on how the peoples of the territories about to be eaten by the ocean should “make each day count.”

Paramount Pictures “To remaining heated and strong dive! Here here! “

And here he is in The Man In The Iron Mask , a movie where they applied the highest-paid performer on the planet’s honcho inside a barrel for most of the running duration. He’s toasting to his mother and his own predominate as king.

United Artists These toasts aren’t … working out absolutely amazing yet.

His next cinematic cup-hoist came in Gangs Of New York , in which he disguises his threat to kill the man who murdered “his fathers” as a toast.

Miramax “And here’s to the guy who killed my pa! Fuck you, buddy.”

Next, in the smash hit everyone surely attended, Revolutionary Road , DiCaprio makes a toast to Kate Winslet being pregnant, right before Michael Shannon manages to shatter the facade and shorten DiCaprio to a screaming, violent shipwreck. The moment is: Nothing good ever happens after a DiCaprio toast.

DreamWorks

Leonardo adorations toasting so much better that he does it even when it’s not appropriate. Here he is justifying the order of Inception . It’s one of the most important and complicated pronunciations anyone in a cinema has ever had to give, so he of course does it by standing up and raising a glass of wine.

Warner Bros. Pictures “So create your glass to how occasion labours differently inside a nightmare, but then likewise daydream parties have to fall out of their chairs to wake up, and if you die in your fantasies, you become a centaur in the next realm up, even if it’s real life.”

In Django Unchained , they had DiCaprio’s curiosity, and then they had his attention … a line that might have been clunky and overwritten had he not interspersed it with a laughable drink.

The Weinstein Company “It wasn’t truly a toast, I guess. I just like giving 40 percent of all movie scripts while I drink.”

In The Wolf Of Wall st. , Leo sarcastically toasts the impotent FBI agents to show them that dickheads can do anything they want if they’re rich enough.

Paramount Pictures “Here’s to the rest of you fuckers taking that exercise, extremely. I’m Leo DiCaprio, and each toast I induce is so, so awful.”

Every single one of this man’s toasts have contributed to pitch-dark and horrible events, but he deters doing them. You cannot stop him. Here he is in the Departed , holding a speedy toast right into the side of another man’s head.

Warner Bros. Pictures “Here’s to you, FUCKING HEAD.”

The point we’re trying to obligate is that if you recognize Leonardo DiCaprio start to raise his glass, run.

Warner Bros. Pictures “Here’s to you being too late. You’re already dead.”

It genuinely was merely a matter of time before someone put Leo on a wine glass . If you desired this article and crave more content like this, support our website with a visit to our Contribution Page. Please and thank you .

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apsbicepstraining · 7 years

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5 Actors Who Do The Same WTF Specific Thing In Every Movie

Arnold Schwarzenegger Is Constantly Perturbed About Forgetting His Partner To Leering Shitheads

20 th Century Fox “Guess your partner likes the confidence that comes from being a total fucking douchebag, bro! “

20 th Century Fox “I couldn’t help but notice your stupendous muscles. Well, I simply work out one muscle, and here’s a clue which one: THE PENIS.”

Hollywood Will Always, Always Destroy Mads Mikkelsen’s Eyes

Take a look at Mads Mikkelsen’s face. Particularly his eyes.

Sony Pictures Television Now, if you even can, try to tear your eyes away.

We … we should probably start explaining.

Eon Productions We’re talking about the one that had all the coloring carved out of it with a dull fork.

Scanbox Entertainment Danish pinkeye does not fuck around.

Summit Entertainment “I’m here to talk to you about the Musketeers initiative.”

Marvel Studios In other statements, FABULOUS.

Sony Interactive Entertainment You, uh … you got a little something in your …

Keanu Reeves Desires Being Strapped Into A Cyber Chair