#he's going thru a name change idk what 2 call him

[catastrofiend]

los diablos's saddest telepath

[melloianv2]

rushed art by me

shit I couldn't add in the post because I ran out and just lazy:

there’s still transformations, but there’s a mechanic call shapeshifting, peppino can shapeshift to certain entities for 60 seconds. Shapeshift mechanic is post to help you get a thru certain levels, such as darkness, pathway blockage (also entering certain places), or beating the shit out of entity idk what else. In nutshell it is a transformation but also not. Once used, there's 1 minute cooldown. There is a way to cancel shapeshift faster, just go near robot that remove experimental changes.

a. Dr Abe put tubes on peppino in order for him to even shapeshift in the first place. Don't ask how it feels to shift.

b.

the game has multiple endings, but once you complete the game first time, you unlock other pathways to get to the other endings. Such as completing extra levels, quests, recruitments and items.

There's are 4 gamemodes in total: platforming, mystery, riddle/question&answers, escape room. its possible for levels to have 2 gamemodes or all (end-game levels).

There's more then 4 bosses. Not every boss you directly hit them, some its chase only. each boss represents the all the levels for each section (its worlds but called sections here). However, the final bosses (nor secret bosses) don't follow this rule

the game is story-oriented. There's also a narrator (known as "the voice") too, the narrator identity is only revealed in one specific ending.

peppino would be the only one playable, because its his story damn. (and gustavo and brick is playable too. (not even call this name at all in this au but whatever) )

just to make it clear, pizzaface (not his name in this au either) is still in this game, but mentioned near end-game and can only be fought in a specific ending. (which he's the finale boss there)

I forgot the rest sorry that's be it for now

[danothan]

hi, it's f0r! gimme some 🔥🔥🔥 for jjba, kira specifically, and/or barry allen!

i can always count on you to be after my own heart <3

🔥barry: idk enough abt the general consensus on flash media to know what’s unpopular, but i will say, i don’t see enough ppl talking abt him being a fucking asshole. he drags up dead people’s names to make a point, like he fights dirty

examples + analysis under cut (spoilers for flashpoint paradox + blackest night, but mostly bc it gets real long)

this is an alt timeline where bruce died in the alley instead of his parents, resulting in his father becoming this world’s batman. barry is trying to convince batman to come with him to restore the timeline, so he brings up his DEAD SON as a persuasion point?? tbf the world IS ending, plus bruce is very much alive to barry, and he IS trying to get him back, but still a dick move

(pls forgive the ass quality, i was scrambling to take a pic bc the store was closing in 10 min 😭)

hal: death is overrated anyway.

barry: don’t tell me that, tell [the ppl whose loved ones have passed].

hal: i didn’t mean it like that—

barry: tell your dead father.

me: HELLO?!? BARRY??!?!

hal Was being an asshole too so ig barry was just trying to fight fire with fire. he seems to only go this far when ppl's lives are at risk, so i can follow his thought process at least.

the page continues to have hal taunt him for caring too much, and the crazy thing is that barry actually concedes. i was overselling it when i said barry fights dirty bc this is sm more than a petty argument to him. he's not trying to one-up or spite hal, it’s a last resort. so when hal turns it back on him, barry doesn't get defensive back. he knows how much he's hurt his loved ones by being the flash, he regrets not being there for hal, and barry admits to being scared of losing it all again—turning hal's call-out into a moment of emotional vulnerability. and only THEN does hal finally realize what barry's been saying.

so there are 2 interesting things happening on barry's end here. barry’s the type of person to follow the golden rule pretty literally. i've mentioned before in a past meta that barry believes in the goodness of humanity bc he can be—HAS to be a firsthand example, not just to others, but to himself. if he can be a good person, then surely others must be as well. props to the character consistency across all these different media bc this idea even (and especially) applies here:

1) the golden rule, treat ppl the way you want to be treated, giving hal a taste of his own medicine so that he understands. it’s important to note that, again, barry does this out of desperation, not pettiness. and he might be dishing it out, but he can take it too. he chooses kindness when he could've easily dug his heel in after hal tried to call him out, but barry is trying to reach out to hal, not fight against him, and diffuses the situation that he ramped up. before this, my immediate impression was that barry spoke callously out of heightened emotions or misreading others, but the way he’s been leading this conversation and responding specifically to hal’s own emotions shows how calculated barry actually is.

2) like i said, barry goes by the mindset of “if i can do it, then so can you.” he draws a direct comparison to both of their deaths (they died and came back btw) and says he can’t believe that even after everything hal has gone thru, he’s still acting like this. personally, i read this as genuine shock and disbelief, not necessarily a dig at hal. but regardless of intention, hal takes it as an accusation, so he flips it back on barry. however, barry realizes that hal is deflecting. this is where he draws that comparison. barry had to learn his mistakes the hard way. he only realized all of this when it was too late, when he already died. he acknowledges that he’s repeating his mistake of fearing for the worst, but the thing is that he’s learned from his past, grown and changed with it. and so he projects this growth onto hal as if their deaths were at all similar (keep in mind, this is the issue where hal tells barry “i died a sinner, YOU died a saint”). again, going back to that idea of “if i can do it, then so can you.”

i think the only reason it works here is that barry knows hal. he can read him, and more importantly, has total faith in him, more than hal is willing to accept. barry’s hope in ppl is just unconditional, for better or worse; he wants to walk hal thru this together, he switches his language from “you” statements (“i can’t believe you haven’t changed) to “us” statements (“i missed a lot of good times we could’ve shared while i was away. and a lot of bad times we could’ve helped each other through.” … “let’s both slow down and figure out a plan”). to quote my friend emm here, they know and trust each other enough that barry can push that boundary and still end up at a reasonable middle ground.

barry is so full of good intention but he doesn’t exactly play nice if he thinks he knows what’s good for you. “if i can do it, then so can you” is a double-edged sword. he wants to believe in the absolute best in others. it doesn’t matter how many mistakes they’ve made or what their past may be, barry has hope if nothing else. but in the same way, it can be a presumptuous thing, setting the bar too high, putting too much pressure onto others. barry is all about the potential of things, working towards a brighter future, but what about the present? what about NOW? barry used to be troubled by his past, but then he gained closure and learned acceptance, so all he does now is look to the future. his powers put him out of touch with time and reality, but he’s never really been able to live in the present; his superspeed only enables this. past, future, but never the present, no wonder he’s so stubborn.

god, see what i mean! do you see what discussions could arise from dissecting the intricacies of barry’s hero complex! he’s not just a superhero paragon, he’s not just some vanilla good guy (tho he is also all of these), there is an entire thought process and timeline of experiences and flaws to study under a microscope here. and buddy, i am getting my barthology degree.

[aroacesigma]

ok anyway izuleo. there is so much to go thru here. pls be aware that i am looping fineknights starlight parade rn so im like 500x more insane. this is so much lore bear with me

okay so. leo and izumi met a bit before the war when leo just kinda. burst into a classroom izumi was practicing in and was like "ur singing sucks lmao" and izumi was like "what the hell" and then they got in a small scuffle or some shit and then leo basically just didn't leave izumi alone and called izumi his muse and composed a bunch of songs for him so they're besties.

so like. izuleo are just kinda chilling. and then the old leader of the mega-unit.... Othello? or Backgammon? I think it was called at the time? has smth happen and can't be the leader anymore (it's heavily implied that Eichi was why the previous leader stepped down) so Leo is left to fill in the slot and he becomes the new leader and renames the unit back to its og name before the name changes to Othello and Backgammon - Chess. but most of the people in the unit (bc at this time units were GIANT and encompassed like hundreds of students) didn't actually care abt being idols and were just kinda in the unit for the sake of the name they could ride off of that looks good on their resumes and shit. Eichi did not like that. so eichi does his eichi things and pulls strings with the student council (thanks keito) and makes it so units cannot be bigger than 5 people and can't really be smaller than 2 due to prohibitive costs and whatnot. (madara is an exception. they let him stay a solo unit bc it kept him out of everyone's hair) so. the mega-units splinter!

Leo and Izumi go to form their own unit out of the splinter units and Leo originally suggests them being named Knight, but Izumi tells him that that name was already taken, and suggests Knights instead. (yes. izumi named their unit.) and so ! Knights is born ! Izumi and Leo are the only real members at this time so they go. recruit people i guess idk. Arashi gets roped in despite not actually caring abt idol-ing at the time and i think Ritsu just kinda comes along bc it's the easiest course of action? idk man it's been so long since i read Checkmate. ANYWAY.

Eichi uses this early Knights to destroy units he sees as threats and to test the DreamLive system (which is the current system operating in Enstars for lives and shit. i cannot explain it) or maybe it's DreamFes? idk. one of the two. anyway. at one point Leo goes to a bunch of the other splinter units and asks if they had to choose between never using his music again (leo is a genius composer btw and is largely attributed to being a reason knights is so popular) and being his friend; or using his music. Every single person he goes to chooses his music over him. Strike one on the Leo Downfall Arc! ALSO ENGSTARS RETCONS THIS. DON'T TRUST THEM. In Engstars Izumi says that Leo once asked him that question too, but that's a fucken LIE Izumi was never asked to choose between Leo and his music bc his choice was always Leo and Leo KNEW that.

The two are disgustingly codependent at this point btw. so like. Leo uses his music to destroy these splinter units of the mega units and everyone Eichi considers a threat and this does. A LOT to his mental state. He's kind of disgustingly codependent with Izumi to the point where he basically tells Izumi that he'll do anything Izumi asks of him and that all he wants is for Izumi to smile (and praise him i think?) bc like. at this point Izumi has gotten super harsh on Leo and like. Izumi is normally prickly but this is way worse. Strike Two on the Leo Downfall Arc!

Sometime after this (I do not know exactly when. again. been awhile) Leo realizes what he's done and the fact that he's stepped on so many people and that his music is little more than a weapon and just fucking. breaks. he becomes a shut-in and basically disappears from Yumenosaki. Izumi visits him a few times - most notably in the short story Lionheart where he visits and Ruka (leo's younger sister) ends up crying and begging Izumi to help Leo, which leads to Leo coming out of his room (and Izumi describes him as being super gaunt and barely able to stand) and tells Izumi off for making Ruka cry. (he didn't make ruka cry btw she's just really worried abt her brother) After that Izumi leaves the house and goes and sits on the beach and is all emo while listening to the MP3 player full of music Leo's made for him. one of the tracks is just a recording of their first meeting too and izumi does not have a good time listening to that. I think at the end of Lionheart Izumi promises to keep fighting in Leo's name until he's strong enough.

Anyway. While Leo's a shut-in he basically stops composing entirely bc he stops hearing music in his head and thinks everything he composes is worthless which leads to him hurting himself (i still hc that he has scars on his hands from biting himself and izumi always gets a little sad when he sees them) which eventually leads to Madara taking Leo to travel the world so he can get his groove back. This is during IzuLeo's second year i think. The war was during their first year i think. timeline is fuzzy ngl. So Leo is basically missing for the entirety of his second year. Knights at that time is Izumi, Ritsu, and Arashi with Leo missing. Leo was their leader (dubbed "ousama" (king) - also the name of my leo fictive. unrelated.) but he's just kinda. gone. so I think during this time Knights just stops performing and slips out of the limelight. Mama and Leo's World Tour happens, which is also kinda sad bc once Leo comes back and is asked abt it he says he was "abducted by aliens" and doesn't remember it. Also when Leo comes back he doesn't go straight back to Yumenosaki, he remains away from Knights and everyone for awhile. Madara is able to coax Leo into performing with him during the story Concerto and that's where Leo finally decides to go back to the stage with his Knights. except oopsie ! all judgement !

So. Leo goes back to Yumenosaki. By jumping in through a window. He does that a lot in the early stories btw idk if he knows what a door is /j BUT. I digress. So he meets Tsukasa at that point and i feel like just kinda brushes him off? and challenges Knights to a duel ! Judgement ! Where he claims that if Knights cannot defeat him then Knights doesn't deserve to exist anymore bc they've grown too weak in his absence. So Izumi is like "Leo-kun what the fuck" and Leo is just like ":3" and peaces out thru the window. Knights are unsurprisingly like "wtf are we meant to do we don't have Leo's songs" and Leo goes and gets his little temporary unit Knights Killers up and running with Eichi, Kuro, and Nazuna. eichi bc they're kinda friends despite everything that happened (and also leo knows that he's strong), and kuro and nazuna bc they're literally the closest people. good work leokun. So ! Knights Killers and Knights go to battle ! Knights begins losing bc Leo can compose on the spot and Eichi is noted to be a powerhouse, and with Leo and Eichi together they're basically unstoppable. During that story we also get this really soft moment of Ritsu (who's Knights strategist) apologizing to... Tsukasa? I think? maybe Izumi? for his strategies not being enough. but as Knights Killers wins, Leo has an "oh shit" moment and realizes that he can't just do whatever the hell he wants with Knights, bc Knights also belongs to the others :3 so Leo is like "yeah no we're not dissolving Knights" and rejoins as their ousama ! (also Knights Killers has a song called Crush of Judgement and its a BANGER go listen to it)

at this point Izumi and Leo have a very kinda. tense? relationship? they're not as disgustingly codependent anyhow. they're kinda distant. but they work on repairing their relationship over time ! izumi is less harsh on Leo and keeps a pretty close eye on him actually (they live together in Italy !) as a sort of way of making up for everything he did. and leo's just a silly goofy guy but is still a little haunted by his past. but the two are working on it.

anyway once they graduate and tsukasa becomes the new ousama, izumi goes to live in italy for. modelling things? i think? i don't really know tbh. and leo goes with bc where izumi goes leo follows and vice versa in most cases. sometime in the modern !! timeline leo is like. doing stuff for GFK (gatekeeper? godfather? idk. one of those dudes. don't ask me abt them i don't get it) and overworking himself and izumi is like "leokun PLEASE" and takes over his scheduling so he doesn't keep working himself to the bone. also leo does like a requiem or something? to see if kasa is worthy of being the leader? or something? gonna be real i do not really remember that story much.

so yeah izuleo were disgustingly codependent and now are more normal and also got gay married in florence. they told me themselves.

theyre absolutely sickening (/pos) i LOVE that omfg . congratulations to them on their italy wedding i fully believe you im sure thats canon . also feeling very sorry for this leo guy i want to hug him . also i listened to that song while reading this and its an absolute banger

[gurorori]

O, P, Q, for thé ask game if you dont mind me asking..

SUM OF Y'ALL PUTTIN' DA SAME LETTERS WAHHH I FEEL BAD!! alrdy answered Q so. we do a li'l scrollin?

anyway!!

O - Where would I like to travel?

travellin' (as a leisure? time? i guess) isn' smth i think ab a lot yet, save 4 in terms of immigration from. here. buuuut in my dreams really, i'd luv 2 travel 2 a few places 4 da cultural aspects.. namely ukraine, our.. half-homeland i guess, which we never actually been 2, but obviously uh. sumthin' sumthin'. nawt anytime soon, but i really wud love 2 reconnect with dat side, even if we don' have any contact with our ukrainian side of da family :[ i still want us b able 2 go there one day, specifically vinnitsa which is where our mother's side of da family was from.

apart from dat, i'd luv 2 go 2 japan — ok stay with me — but 'm deathly afraid of big cities (been 2 moscow & st petersbrug an' both times killed us badly) an' tokyo has like, da same population as moscow but much more population.. density? an' jus' seein' da amnts of ppl mkes me super nervous >_< i dream of goin' on a tour of like, shrines an' temples an' otherwise culturally significant stuff, as well as foooood. but ofc 'm willin' 2 put up with a bit of tokyo ONLY cuz of harajuku. i Will hit all da lolita stores. but really i'd luv a trip 2 japan jus' 2 experience da food & culture :3c an' i guess put our dusty musty japanese 2 da test?

nextttt morocco, ik dats.. unusual but dats where our mother's part of da family is Originally from, as they immigrated from there 2 ukraine.. (an' then our mother did, 2 russia.. gulp) an' she was born & raised in ukr, so she always kinda wanted 2 go back 2 morocco 2 at least experience it, but obv lack of funds etc. she always talkd ab it a lot an' stuff. kinda like we're the repeat of dat but with ukraine hehe? so, i wanna visit both if we ever have da chance 2.

P - What kind of music I like?

oghhhh well. bit all over da place but again do stay with me.. i think our very first music experience where we Knew wat we wer doin' & consciously wer seekin' out music 2 our taste was with the Holy Emo Trinity. yeah sorry 2 bring those memories back, none of em r even 'emo' exacly & hate bein' called it or wtv, but yeah n_n mcr, patd, fob... i think we wer into patd da most, ik i personally still am (system integration is a weird thing - i believe i merged w the previous host who was the one 2 discover all those, like, arnd the age of 11-13?).. a fever you can't sweat out (2004) by panic at the disco changed our entire life trajectory. i still have it as my #1 mika album of all time. i do have a lotta love 4 mcr too, fob we wer a bit less into, but yeah.

'm occasionally into pop-ish stuff, i like mika lots (also name twins :3), his voice & his art r spectaaaacular an' very unique an' him. he's so goodddd, his songs def helped us thru many stuffs jus' like da aforementioned bands. idk he jus' gets it, even the melancholic songs he writes (dat hit suspiciously close home >:0) r like DESIGNED 2 lift ya up i swear.

idk wat 2 define aurora as an' i wudn' really call her pop, she's a bit of her own character, especially here she's nawt exacly well known at all, but yeah i had 2 mention her. i don' think i ever connected with an artist on a deeper level than it was with her, largely due 2 her also bein' on da spectrum (it wasn' clear if she's adhd or asd but hey i can diagnose her.), like i see myself in her thoughts an' behaviors so much, da way she talks an' carries herself an' expresses herself in the art she creates. i genuinely Have Feelings 4 her she's so beautiful an' i can't stswp bein' obsessed w her & her music. da stories she weaves & da way she puts her emotions into lyrics is sooo special 'm Really happy 2 live in da same time as her. back 2 her bein' different like us, it really inspires me how unapologetically herself she is, like seein' a neurodivergent creator get Big (in sum parts of da world at least) an' thrive so visibly is astonishin'. i hope 2 attend her concerts one day :[ srry 4 da ungodly amounts of infodumpin' i doin' here but she means Dat much 2 me...

oh an' last but TOTALLY nawt least, 'm a huge goth, i luvvvv goth music so much, i guess a bit 'basic' but i really love the og styff, like siouxsie, bauhaus, the cure, joy division, sister of mercy etc.. i also luv 45 grave, the cramps, the birthday massacre, plastique noir, alien sex fiend, depeche mode, an' ugh SO much more i can't list it all 😭 i listen 2 a lotta goth is wat i can say.

oh an' 'm also a big fan of visual kei (as an extension of gothic lolita ofc...) but i mainly focus on malice mizer, as well as a few eroguro kei bands (which i rly enjoy as a genre too, who woulda thought...)

[rawrmeansilyindinosawr]

Pooperz

every song i listen 2 from now ONN / mo0bin forwarDDt HAZ to hav the redbone tune underneath it (song can b layered a bunch) n Thtz w NO eggceptions n settling . :-] N if u fuk me thru a soundcloud ad Thts how I kno u love me <3 .!!! i wrote a lil poetry zine on “on loving a trans boy” Cuz. like. idk. Not 2 get 222 personal but (Also if 222 is ur angel number i HATE U AND fuck U!!!!) it diff to experience as a queer person whut it lik to giv someone they T shot n lik actually see them grow n change thru it .!

Part of the poem i wrote (it on my poetry Ig account and tumblR) :

“the first time u intertwine ur body with him u will feel the pain it took for him to get here. yet all the strength. the battle the bruises the scars. u change ur semantics. and pay attention to his movements. resonate with the feeling of familiarity in a body torn open but completely soft. and the clothes are off. and we are both nude. but the vagina still remains an open wound. something u can not bandage. only describe as something reclaimed.”

Deezz NUTZ jk i mean Dis Week ish has been sad n i hav been doin 2 much blow n spiraling upwards Alwayzz n finding out u kan txt tha Suicide hotline now instead of Kall <3 *_* :-D !!!!! Also b4 they connect u with somEoNe they Ask if Ur Gay lmao cuz there a specialist Gay Person who knowz how to talk to u in a better way.?! i Tink watching Ded Poet Society triggered meH LOl. wellbutt anywayZzz.!!!! Nyfw w is overrrrr n I had nothing 2 do wiff it :/] but moi bestie dante Had a styling gig n wuz AMWZINGGGGGG.!!! :3 we went to a fashion show n Skipt line while he farted rly loud < im sry im puttin u on blast rn Babezz. > then blamed iT on Meh which bc of swiss army man A24 movie i WilL take tha blame cuz intimacy exists rly in Flatchulance n also sharing toilet 2gether in the backstage models bathroom of tha Fashion show resNorting old K we find our nostrils then Mixing rando drinkz we find on the makeup tablezz n bein surprised Dere r keBoobZ there n Pb n J sammyz. liK oK go OFF n actually b a professhh Fashion Show…!!!! den we fake watched tha superbowl at Hush in midtown N almost lost Praying”Gods FavZ” purse n i was caught littering my almond chocolate soy Milk on a stripper stage . Run!!!!! also dat E pill wuz rly cute it wuz pink n crown shaped but Wuz everything kinda not as happy and super blurry..!!! ?

Dissh week i also Swuirted to clairo nitecore edition :-]] n h8 havin adhd but at least im kNo how 2 eat salami by the Chub. (thts whut google calls it.) Hehehhehehehehe. gettin moi diagnosis finalized Tmrw hopefully n Gettin on Summ medicinez. im v adhd hyper fixated Rn on ice spice who Wuz also suppoSt 2 pull up 2 dat fashion show we were at butt didn’t. 4 now , everything Reminds meh of her</3 ….. Orange cones on tha st , pepper grinderzz/ shakers (spice) , 5 chinese spice , my friends dog “lunch” boXxx cuz his name rhymes w munch n n n n n Yah lik honestly Everything . ?!.?!

WakiNg Up w Negativez in my account cuz my Boss not bossa Nova forgot 2 paY meH ovEr thA course of Tha Last month N i didn’t even kno til i wuz in my Sexy crushes bed listening 2 Imogen heAp N In Tha Clurbb mixx by Sandalz n they wrote poetry 4 ffivee hours straight n My tummy hurteD fuz i was drinkin truffle SoY saUce from the bottle and i wuz manically checking my Bank statements 2 submit to Snapp HRA crackle Pop Rice Krispieeezzz. Also all of dis happened w a singulaR Vegan Taiwanese green onion pAnc@Ke on the floor on a chacoochie board with bulgolgi and kimchi n more truffle soy sauce . Untouched .

alSo found Untouched by the Veronicas on soundcloud but lik sped up n Holy shit i hav loved this song forever but literally lik YO diss is my heart..?!!!!!! “And I don't give a damn what they say, or what they think, think

'Cause you're the only one who's on my mind

I'll never, ever let you leave me

I'll try to stop time forever

Never wanna hear you say goodbye

I feel so untouched and I want you so much

That I just can't resist you

It's not enough to say that I miss you

And I need you so much

See you, breathe you

I want to be you

You can take, take, t-take, take, time, time

To live, live the way you gotta, gotta live your life

Give me, give me, give me all of you, you

Don't be scared, of seeing through the loneliness

I want it more, more, more

Don't even think about what's right or wrong, or wrong or right

'Cause in the end it's only you and me

And no one else is going to be around

To answer all the questions left behind

And you and I are meant to be

So even if the world falls down today

You've still got me to hold you up, up

And I will never let you down, down”

<33333

Y does it feel like moi crush doesnT like me rn. :-[ N Y do lesbians Always hav the MOST unstable Housing situationZ??? then either wanna UHaul with U or move to ASTORIA .?!? Also i hope all of u make assumptions about my sexuality bcuz i Rly rly rly like whipt cream from the Can , and raw . Emphasis on whiPped. n Cream. n RAWr xD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MEOW MEOW RAWR RAWR GRERRR!!!!!!!!!!!!1 i kant keep rereading the msg i didn’t Send i ended up calling n yelling n Thts whut got meh bLocked. :-[[ Rugratzs .!!! i luv staying up watching movies w my friends ex’s Im tryna get wiff and Accidwntally thinking K is coke and feeling lik SHIT butt watchin every1 giv intense eye contact n cleanin da house n then losing tha dog Lik WHTFFF.?! Then All of a sudden that plug pulls up N everyone is confused N also randomly the guy living upstairs has my iPhone location N pulls downstairs 2 hangs:-]]] i always wonder if I’m popular but in reality i am just breaking oUt on my ForeheAd cuz all i eat is fried Chiggen N moi green haired browneyedd luver looks like invader zimm sometimezz alotta Da time n i think they r SKUTE.!! n i lik their lisp! im SAD sad my 2/2 cis male friend is gOnna print out a sign on his door Dat Says “blood OathinG” with a Red Circle around it n a Line around it basically sayin NOOOOOoooOoOoOoT allowed.!! butt ima blood oath wiffhh invader Jim dish nxt week n it is a PLANZZ.!!

i wrote a poem ab our phone Kall tht has impacted meh m my heart n also this is a snippet of 1 of my poems in my new book i still writing Kalled STRAWBERRY DELIRIUM :-}}”my friends don’t wanna die anymore they wanna live . they don’t wanna slip away to shreds with fentanyl test strips. they still wanna snort k n apologize for being gay but we all r human longing for all of this…” N another poem tht explainzz this blog title. Cuz i luv my fwendz n shared a moment in which we found popperz.

“Felt that rush on my head

as i laid in ur bed

and found a vile hidden

under ur pillow

u laugh and i manically panic

turning bright lite crimson red

And when it spills all over ur arms

drip dropping like tap water

i snort it all off ur arms

and i h a t e the way it makes me feel

similar to the feeling like ill fall

when im in my platform shoes

going up n down ur spiral stair case that looks like slices of cheesecakes

and u sigh scream cuz u never liked them at all

and hate is a strong word but so is love

And i hate the way the poppers make me feel

but i do love you “

okIkkkKkkkKkk i kinda hate that poem but whatever. sooo Vday wuz cute it is n0T only single awareness day but reflecting on ur situationsjips day n feeling sad ab it day but whatev. NormalZe watching cHaterbAte on the subWay n mindIng ur FooOoking Business?..!! my Friends say if i were a sammicH i wuld b a caprese. butt i feel like a ruben. #misunderstood <\3 i hav been watching SM hellokitty n Fwendzz n realized am kuromi and hello kitty is my friend .!!! N i listen to metal N rock w my headphonezz Real Hi n Loud n mak moi own clothes .! N i hav a crush on badtzmaru cuz they look like a penguin dyke n their gender is X.!! <3 <3 🐧 🫶🏻👩🏻‍❤️‍👩🏻 they r epitome of sapphic Desirezz n untoxic uhaul luv<3 :-]

tIL nxt week.?? Carl wheezer luver n Cali King bed listener on Max volume on subway N my big three is adderal sun , ketamine moon , cocaine rising <3 Also no i did NOT clog tha toilet at a house party after party this week N no i did not need help unclogging it N no i don’t even poop or do popperz cuz i’m PERFECT…!!!!!!!<333

Xoxo,

Rennybabycutebabyangel plz buy my clothes n ask ab my story sale / failed depop. :-]

[koishua]

hi vienna ,, tbh u dont need to read this bc idk if itd be triggering (body image issues) and id rather u not trouble urself bc of me but id like to vent somewhere and i dont have any1 to talk 2 so pls feel free to ignore .

ive always been overweight for my age but i never faced any bullying abt it other than some very occasion name calling of "fat" in elementary school and my family's disaproval for the way i look. as i grew up, i started to feel more comfortable around others despite not being satisfied with the way i look and i assumed that as kids mature they become more accepting, bc i had never been truly bullied b4 i just assumed it might be rare in communities such as where i lived compared to some of the horror stories i had heard. anyways all my life i had assumed people had been seeing me for more than what i looked like, i always tried to be kind and make a good impression on other but ig that's not true. as much as i love my circle of friends, im not sure i can see them same after what happened on friday. it isnt even their fault, i just feel very insecure now. but basically in 1 of my classes, we had a change in seating so i no longer sat near my friends but 2 acquantainces (they're rlly sweet girls but idk them too well) and this one guy that i also dont know very well other than that in 8th grade he had dated an old friend of mine for a little bit. but anywyas tbh i feel like im just being dramatic but i srsly can't get his conversation out of my mind . the boy was sat next to me and talking to his friend, their convo alr starting off on a wierd note abt kanye west. and the guy next to me (ill call him ray to make it easy) starts off by saying that kanye's note all that bad and has said some pretty true things. ray then goes on to say that fat people dont deserve to exist and body positivity is a completely stupid subject bc it only encourages obesity and unhealthy habits. all the while he's saying this, seated right next to me and im pretty sure he was glancing at me while saying it too . those 90 minutes were the most uncomfortable in my entire life. i was literally panicking while he was talking abt it and it's all that i can think of now. their conversation was truly disturbing to me and my confidence feels as if its completely tanked . his comments of "fat people are gross" and "being fat shouldnt be celebrated" keep ringing in my head everytime i go out or see myself in a mirror. i genuinely feel so broken and it hurts that theyve probably dont realize the effect of their words but also it hurts that that's all they can see me as. not another human being or a classmate but just "fat". idk where im going with this but i dont feel ok and i feel so exhausted now ,, just the thought of having to see ray's face again or hear his voice is scaring me . maybe im just overthinking but i cant help but wonder if my friends picture me the same way. am i even deserving of love if im so "ugly" . my friends sometimes comment that i look way older than my age or that i could pass for college aged and even comments like those are hard to brush off for me. sometimes i wonder if i should restrain my jokes and personality to stay kind bc that's all i am to them. just a source of comfort, and if i dont do that then i could be easily execused. im always scared of saying the wrong thing but now i keep wondering if it would never even matter bc all anyone will ever see me as is "fat" . it's not like i haven't tried to lose weight so i rlly hate everything that ray said and its srsly put me thru sm turmoil . anyways i shld keep this brief (sorry for the rant) and im sorry again for using ur inbox to rant , i rlly hope this doesn't cause you any pain or you find it triggering :( i apologize if it has caused you any concern or pain. i hope ur good and stay happy vie

tw: body image and weight talk

hello, dear :( let me start this off by saying that don't worry, i am perfectly alright and am glad that you feel it's safe enough to vent and write your feelings out in my inbox. you don't have to apologize for anything! i am the one who says that they're open if anyone needs to rant or vent. i would never judge. i had to read this a few times in order to collect my thoughts, so pardon me for delaying this a bit. i wasn't sure if you wanted my direct response, so i will just keep it short.

i won't say that i completely understand what you've been through and i can't speak on experiences i haven't personally lived through. however, as another human being, i will say this: you absolutely deserve to exist. i hope you never ever doubt that. i know how difficult it is to deal with comments about your appearance and it angers me so much that you're treated this way. i get how the side comments every now and then feels. bullying is horrible, but this is just as bad for someone's self esteem and health. im truly so sorry and wish i could do something for you, but i can't because of obvious reasons (that being me being just an online presence and not there with you).

i just want to reassure you that no matter what anyone says, you deserve love and life and goodness. a lot of people don't understand how difficult it is when you don't weigh below a certain number or how isolated that could make someone feel regardless if they're mentioned or not. everyone is so much more than just their appearance. idk how else i could help you other than to strongly remind you that you are you and that should be enough for your friends and that people should learn to keep their mouths shut on their opinions about other people's appearance. it doesn't matter if you lose the weight or if you tell them you struggle a lot with it. those people should reassess the way they're treating another human being with real feelings and thoughts. never lose who you are and trying to be what other people need and want you to be. it may end up making things worse, i know, and im not sure if you've ever told them directly that their words are extremely rude and hurtful and that they should stop, but someone (even if it's not you yourself) really, really should.

i pray that none of what i said has further upset you in any way. if so, i sincerely apologize :( i genuinely hope that this never happens to you again and that you'll have a greater year than ever and that you'll find wholehearted acceptance and love from those you are surrounded by and that you'll slowly but surely feel comfortable in your own skin. take care and you're loved! people like the ray you mentioned are not worth feeling bad over.

[agayconcept]

.

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

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1. I am searching for a time travel fix-it that wasn't on any of the three time travel rec posts. It was short (>2k I think) and didn't deal with how WWX/LWJ changed things but rather the after affects of remembering the way it *had* been before the time travel- the scene I remember is WWX in LWJ's arms having woken from a nightmare and LWJ reassuring him that none of the other timeline's things would happen. Any ideas? Thanks!

FOUND? Memories of a Life Never Lived by donutsweeper (T, 1k, wangxian, time travel, fix-it, hurt/comfort, memories, nightmares)

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2. Hi for the next fic finder I'd really like some help finding this fic - it was time travel i think modern wwx travels back because there was a book sent to him and it said that only wei ying can use (?) it idk how he did but he ends up in a room or so with everyone including people that died. It was a few years after the siege before he was summoned. He wakes up confused cause he sees his husband but not his husband cause of his outfit and hair. I remember a scene where lwj cradled his head because he thought he saw red and his hair was cut and thought wwx was injured but it was actually wwx having an undercut with red hair dye. Then they all talk about what happened years ago and wwx tells them past wwx's pov cause the book was actually his diary/journal. Oh additional scene: wwx gets angry because ayuan doesn't call him baba after he realizes that lsz is his baby ayuan and why he wasn't there to raise him. Thank you! 

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3. Hello, thank you for the hard work. I need help in finding a fic. It is post canon where WWX was kidnapped. LWJ and JWY, and a whole lot of cultivators from different sects where there to investigate. Chenqing was found in his room, in an inn. The room was wrecked, signs of struggles and all. Then people who are close to WWX tried to take his flute, because it rejected some arsehole who tried. LWJ ended up using it to locate WWX, only playing their song. He ended up with chapped lips. @aeszdjie​

FOUND! something wild calls you home by Fleetling (T, 9k, wangxian, kidnapping, injury, rescue, love confessions, first kiss, happy ending, Mojo’s post)

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4. hi!! i rly cant find this fic so its p much set during the cloud recesses study arc but canon divergence? has some ocs as well but the only occurring ones r the lan sect ocs

i dont remember the specifics but lan qiren eventually talks to wei wuxian abt whether or not he feels challenged in his class n when wwx says no, lqr sends him off to a lan tailsman class

(beforehand the teacher of said class tested him n wwx went NUTS. the test was something abt protecting a wifes coffin? but the protection array didnt work at all n it got robbed within x amnt of months n the teacher said essentially what can wwx do to solve the problem of the array)

other prominent plot points are:

- nhs helps wwx at one point to dress up when wwx invited lwj to caiyi town (to find a thank u gift for lqr) n told him to say he forgot his coat n made his waist look smaller w a belt. on the date wx shares an umbrella, ate at a place both jades enjoyed, lwj ravishes wwx when wwx confessed n basically mauled his neck and lwj gave wwx his coat (white coat, blue embroidered cloak) — not in order

- lwj and wwx eventually got betrothed bc lqr caught them getting a lil too frisky in a hidden but public space for a second time (first time was the library). wwx had to publically secede from yunmeng jiang in order for the betrothal to go thru and he suffered a major panic attack bc jiang fengmian pulled him out during the alloted break to basically trauma dump on wwx — saying how he thought he could keep wwx at lotus pier but in the end he was still like his father, leaving him alone. jfm essentially saw wwx as an extension of cssr and wcz (more of the latter tho i think) n not as his own person. after jfm confirms wwx wants to do this and its not a joke he acts cold to wwx n calls him via courtesy name.

- drunk lan shenanigans. wx, jc, nhs and an oc went out to celebrate that wx and the oc r betrothed n wwx/jc/nhs convinced both lans to drink. oc went nuts n starts becoming loud n almost ran off to see his fiancee and lwj jumps out the window w wwx to do something that i dont remember.theres more but im p sure it could be tagged as explicit bc ykno wangxian as teenagers n courting… Yeah… thank u for ur help if u find it!! **I swear I have read this exact fic but for the life of me I can’t remember it :’) ~Mod L**

FOUND! Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 310k, wangxian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, feelings   realization, getting together, fix-it of sorts, not JFM friendly, blood & gore, WIP)

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5. Hello I have been following for a while for recomendations, I have lives many of them, but I can not find this fic that was an Adams Family au. It was si cure and fun and it was wangxian as the parents of an extended family with Minjue as a zombie, Meng Yao doing the business deals, and Xichen being a medium. Do You know it?

FOUND! The Altogether Ooky WangXian Family by FluffyHippogriff (T, 52k, wangxian, 3zun, JYL/JZX, BSSR/LY, Addams Family au, kid fic, comedy, found family, WIP)

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6. not sure if this fic exists or is just a fever dream: Jin prison camp crimes are discovered bc Wei Wuxian is discovered in one— after having been presumed dead since sometime around the fall of lotus pier. Jins basically rolled up all the prisoners the Wen had who they didn’t recognize as being worth returning to someone valuable. Wei Wuxian of course basically adopts Wen Yuan in the camp.

FOUND? ❤️The Third Young Master of the Qishan Wen by KouriArashi (T, 139k, wangxian, xiyao, chengqing, romance, angst w/ happy ending, hurt/comfort, politics, revenge, families of choice, pining, Mojo’s post)

FOUND? ❤️Where the nightingales are singing, and a white moon beams. by Moominmammashandbag (M, 52k, wangixan, jin zixuan & lan wangji, no powers au, grief/mourning, aftermath of war, angst w/ happy ending, reunions, fluff & smut, Mojo’s post)

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7. Hi, I need help in finding a LXC/JGY fic where jgy kinda orchestrates wangxian getting together bc wangji is pining and sad that is making lxc sad and jgy is done TM with wangji pining and wants is husband to be happy and focus on their relationship. He's worried that if lxc finds out his scheming he'll hate him but then lxc reveals that he knew and loves him for it. Jgy was married into Lan and I think he didn't join the Jin before, but if remember correctly jgs asks to legitimize him for political advantages after he marries lxc and he's really mad about it. Thank you!!

FOUND? a micro utopia born as the overture plays by tardigradeschool (T, 18k, LXC/JGY, wangxian, canon divergence, fix-it, marriage, fluff, scheming, everyone lives au, kid fic)

FOUND? No More Masks by KouriArashi (M, 63k, LXC/JGY, JGY/XY, wangxian, fix-it, angst w/ happy ending, slow burn, redemption, hurt/comfort, dubious consent, implied/referenced child abuse, implied/referenced prostitution)

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8. Hello, im looking for a fic where WangXian was getting married and it was WWX's pov. All i remember was that LWJ insisted on wearing the veil. In the end, it was revealed that it was because he couldn't stop smiling and didn't want any one else seeing him that happy. @aeszdjie​

FOUND! I think this one is Thinly Veiled by thunderwear (G, 1k, wangxian, post-canon, weddings, fluff, tenderness, love, kissing, intimacy, LWJ smiling)

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9. Hey, I am looking for a modern fic in which lan zhan and wei ying are friends and lanzhan brings Wei Ying to his apartment now and then where he meets lan xichen and they become close. Lan zhan sees Wei Ying and his brother being close and comfortable with each other when he comes home which makes Lan zhan think Wei Ying likes Xichen and Lan zhan is jealous.But Wei Ying later tells him that he loves lan zhan and he had misunderstood Xichen and him.

FOUND! Smile for Me by kuro (T, 9k, wangxian, modern, college/university au, jealousy, fluff)

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10. Idk , if this is right time to ask or not ..even here to ask **Yes, this is the right place and anytime is a right time ^^ MIght take some time for it to be posted tho! ~Mod L** but I have been trying to find this fics for like months A) This have teen wangxian...alpha wangji and omega weiying . When weiying gets pregnant he think that his bf will left him in all this lqr hears this and support WWX  I think this one morden au  B) this one was like arrange marriage thing where the elders lan told wuxian that wangji wasn't sexually active and not wanted wuxian to touch  him and  other hand wangji thinks wuxian was forced to marry so wuxian doesn't come closer to him.. this one may have 4 chapters @selflovingmedj

10A)

FOUND? In which Lan Qiren eavesdrops and gets a new nephew (and grandnephew) out of it by h0peless_oblivion (M, 62k, wangxian, modern, high school au, ABO, teen pregnancy, shotgun wedding, fluff & angst, family feels, humor, family drama, WIP)

10B)

FOUND? a light hidden and singing by occultings (microcomets) (E, 48k, wangxian, arranged marriage, pining, getting together, slow burn, misunderstandings, miscommunication, blood & injury, happy ending, smut)

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11. Trying to find a  fanfic in which wwx was bullied in lotus pier by the disciples. In addition to the bullying, wwx ran errands for teachers and madam yu banned any swordsmith to make him sword. If you have any ideas, I would appreciate it 

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12. I’m looking for a fic where after WWX saves the people from the Qiongqi path and it’s found out that it wasn’t just Wens in there but also people from other sects.

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13. hello! i’m looking for a wangxian fic on ao3 where there was a yiling wei sect leaded by cssr and wcz. wwx was the heir and he had younger siblings. the wei sect and the lan sect were enemies. also all the sect heirs and people were sent to yiling sect for studies. lans kill wwx’s parents when wwx is away and it’s v sad when he comes back… also there is art in the fic. wwx becomes sect leader and wangxian gets together in the end. it’s completed btw. Note: It’s not “Balance” by AnaraneSindanarie

FOUND? Song Unwritten by Kytrin & Mslead (E, 94k, wangxian, temporary character death, angst w/ happy ending, fix-it of sorts, cql meets mdzs, parallel universes, transmigration, yiling wei sect au, YLLZ WWX)

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14. hello! I am looking for a fic, it's post canon I think, where wwx leaves mxy's body and my comes back in his body. I don't remember what happened after that but I think there was a scene where mxy was confused why he was in bed with lwj and lwj called him 'wei ying?' and mxy said he wasn't wei ying. I really hope you can find this fic. @archiiishaaa

FOUND? A New Lease on Life by pearliegloom (M, 6k, wangxian, post-canon, body swap, fluff & angst, established relationship, past abuse, disturbing themes, happy ending)

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15. Hi! I'm looking for a fic for a while and could use some help.  Parallel world setting, with wwx growing up a nei who had just died (sucide?) off screen. The fic takes place when nhs grabs a wwx (coreless, after cliffside sucide), because  wwx is brother-shapped and only, like, mostly dead as opposed to his world's wwx whose soul was, like, shattered? No sunshot war, in this parallel, idthink. ... short fic. Any idea?

FOUND? Chapter 13: Love and Acceptance of Short Prompts by Vrishchika (Nie WWX, dimensional travel, canon divergence, NHS pov)

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[uptownhags]

a story about how tumblr user uptownhags is gonna mind her business. i’m v sorry if you are on mobile and forced to take this wild ride. 

context from a long time ago: sister has a TBI, starts medication, has impaired judgement and memory problems for several years. NOT CUTE, there are major consequences. ‘that never happened,’ ‘idk what you’re talking about,’ still come up in the year 2022. but it wasn’t her fault. 

2017: seeing this guy we called [pick a name] who is also the closest friend i’ve ever had. he’s a lil younger than me, a lil fun™. he gets in a car crash.  he made a bad choice. in hospital, has a TBI. starts medication for migraines, etc. it’s the same one. he is going thru it, is super vulnerable with me, tells me a LOT of serious things. i reciprocate. we’re still walking around with each other’s big secrets. he has memory trouble, but it’s manageable.  2018: i formally meet his brother’s whole sweet family and his cool as hell uncle. my mom and brother love him. ‘i didn’t know that,’ ‘i’m sorry i forgot,’ etc. are a regular thing, but he still makes plans and speeches. he’s a lil salty. doubles meds. physically sick a whole lot, but i know how to handle it.   early 2019:  we name our eventual kids. we celebrate ‘future mothers’ day’ and talk about a tiny back yard wedding with [cutest bb] as flower girl. ‘his parents will come around.’ fall 2019: while i’m out of town, his mother sets him up with a more suitable ((rich af; lawyer)) woman in a different city who shares his culture. it’s v unexpected for all 3 of us. the light in his eyes is gone. we have 2 months of conversations about all the things we’ve been through. he is fuzzy on moments that i consider big. he knows he loves me, but is not totallyyy 100% sure what got us here. he is devastated and cries into my hair. the lawyer friend requests me. it turns out we have mutual friends and i don’t say shit to most people. [pick a name] and i are ‘pals, it’s fine.’  [for 6 months]: i am kind of an asshole privately and say/let my friends and fam say terrible things about the whole situation. who among us has not? pls note 1 or 2 of them were correct, for example he is kinda little. the worst insult queen of tx has is ‘she didn’t trust that gorgeous dumbass to be on time.’ he explains changing his treatment, and he is sober. we remain cordial but, understandably, it is weird. c*vid hits, he travels twice to bring his parents to/from his brother’s house, we stop talking, and he’s not on social media.  last week: i have a conversation with his family about art and maybe continuing their kiddos’ portrait series bc it’s their favorite thing. bb is ‘an artist like me.’ they are all doing very well. his parents are mostly back in their home country. there have been no real developments in his relationship (aka he never put a ring on it). has some new, different friends. he texts me to check if i’m okay, when i’m home alone and sick. we talk on NYE and day. he would like to meet for a friendly coffee. i haven’t said yes to the art or the coffee. 

[runin-reads]

❛ s o l a r s y s t e m ❜

— hinata harem drabbles and reader insert

SYNOPSIS: my thoughts on various hinata ships, plus my take on what it would be like to marry the sunshine himself.

PAIRINGS: kenhina, kagehina, atsuhina, oihina, hoshihina, tsukkihina, hinata x reader.

A/N: I would add wayyy more ships but I didn’t want this to be too long. I may add a part 2 depending on the feedback I get.

MANGA SPOILERS

☆ﾐ KENHINA

— the only sugar baby and sugar daddy relationship that matters

— shoyou says he likes something off-handedly only for  kenma to buy it in bulk the next day 

— “if you get boring, I’ll stop ;)” that’s it that’s the sunmary. need I say more to describe their dynamic?

— Kenma and him fight a lot to cover the bill, only for Kenma to pay for it secretly on his way to the bathroom 

— honestly just such caring boys to each other. Kenma is so intune with how Shoyou feels and will lay down just about anything to make him feel better. Shoyou brings happiness and energy to Kenya’s life and makes sure that he takes plenty of breaks from the screen, so he can rest. 

— he’s part of the pretty setter squad, what can I say.

☆ﾐ KAGEHINA 

— literal representation of yin-yang. They balance eachother out in the best way and work perfectly together

— volleyball dorks that wanna bring each other to new heights. Constantly noticing improvement (namely Hinata’s) in each other and instantly being filled with joy at the sight of it  

— like seriously. Kageyama was the first to see potential in Hinata, and was willing to put effort into drawing his talent out. Before Kageyama there was no one who would do that shit, and i honestly can’t imagine Hinata without his influence 

—romance aside, their friendship and teamwork is something we all want in life. They’re intune with the others needs and characters, they’re a POWERFOUPLE and everyone acknowledges them as one

☆ﾐ ATSUHINA

— wow, he can jump. That’s it, we wilding now 🤪

— deadass saw him play for one match and decided “ah yes. I want this one” LMAO 

— Atsumu made a promise to toss for him and actually fulfilled that oath 6 years later. King really did THAT. 

— okay but Atsumu casually staking claim over Hinata as HIS wing spiker, really brought out his protective bf side. You can just tell how much pride and trust he has in Hinata as a teammate, enough where he’ll call him HIS wing spiker at any given time.

— I just love the way Hinata encourages Atsumu and his jokes that go over everyone else’s head. 

— “Atsumu-san! I found it funny!” :D

— hinata comes thru when no one else does. We love to see it 

— Atsumu being the stressed mom friend of the jackals and Hinata either adding to the stress, or helping him out.

— hinata being one of the few people that matches Atsumu’s energy for constantly thinking of new moves/techniques for volleyball. Will stay long after practice just to work together and play the sport they love.

☆ﾐ OIHINA 

— DO NOT TELL ME THAT OIKAWA DIDN’T MAKE SEVERAL TRIPS TO RIO TO VISIT HINATA AGAIN. DO N O T.

— oihina spent several days in the honeymoon phase. Going to restaurants, building sandcastles, playing beach volleyball, taking selfies to piss old rivals off. And this is Brazil we’re talking about. They 100% went to bars and danced in the streets, drunk off of the alcohol and the feeling of being close to each other. If this doesn’t scream “forbidden summer romance, I found a piece of home away from home” energy, then idk what does.

— they met as two homesick boys that left the country to pursue their dreams. Both of them were feeling lost and had no idea where to go from there, but then they saw each other and their vigor was restored. I’ll say it again, THEY FOUND A PIECE OF HOME INSIDE EACHOTHER. THEY REMINDED EACHOTHER OF THEIR ULTIMATE GOALS AND THAT VOLLEYBALL IS A SPORT WHERE YOU HAVE FUN.

— oikawa definitely needs reminding that he is enough, that he is skilled and hardworking, and most  importantly to take care of himself. Hinata would definitely be able to provide this support to him. He is a fountain of endless praise and validation, and what makes it better is that it’s all sincere and only based on the truth. 

☆ﾐ TSUKKIHINA

— Tsukki would fucking punch himself before catching feelings for Hinata. Which is what makes this ship even funnier.

— it’s just Tsukki back at it again with his salty inner-monologue to himself and denying his feelings, only for Hinata to waltz right in and change his view of everything 

— the type of couple to be arguing and all up in each others faces, only to be like “holy shit he’s close,” and be reduced to a blushing mess

— when Hinata actually sasses back yall better be behind Tsukki to catch him as he burns. This man will either clap right back or short circuit from the shock alone. 

— he probably develops a hunch from holding hinata's hand all the time and crouching down to give a hug. Mans looking like Quasimodo but it’s okay, he’s in love.

☆ﾐ HOSHIHINA

— not really a fav ship of mine, but I gotta give appreciation where appreciation is due

— they’re so alike yet so different in so many ways 

— I just love how they’ve finally found someone to relate to, someone who knows exactly what it’s like to be underestimated at first, only to completely soar through their expectations in order to reach higher heights 

— they’re a great reference to each other, and they clearly love seeing the other improve and try out different things. They have a deep respect and sense of rivalry, and they most definitely are the dumbest-and-dumbest couple that can’t figure out shit outside of volleyball 

— they compete over the pettiest shit. Will race each other to get into the shower first, or put on their seatbelts. Chaotic energy can be sensed from miles away. Can’t be left alone to do anything without the building collapsing smh.

☆ﾐ HINATA X READER 

— ngl you got the entire volleyball scene jealous 

— like you managed to snag the most versatile and sought after player in the whole of Japan. You really did THAT.

— Shoyou is definitely the type to give you a one-handed hug and a kiss to the forehead every time he has to leave for something 

— will sling an arm around you from behind and ask you about your day. Asks you quick fire questions like, “have you eaten yet?” “Have you drank water?” And is overall a super attentive lover 

— “hey, I’m Shoyou Hinata and this is my spouse!” Cue the blinding grin that’s brighter than the sun 

— Like they do for Hinata, players like Hoshiumi and Ushijima address you by your full name, and you and your husband find it hilarious. 

— “OI HINATA” - kageyama 

— the both of you turn around 

— all chaos ensues

— I feel like Shoyou wouldn’t be the type to flirt with you at first, he’d just be really upfront with it. Will dead ass head straight towards you after practice or something, and say, “hey! Wanna go back to my place after this?” 

— he’d say this with the BRIGHTEST SMILE, and I bet he’d blush a lot too

— he would still blush, even once yall are married and everything 

— everyone cries at your wedding. You don’t know if it’s tears of joy, or they’re all at a loss because they wanted Hinata all to themselves. And honestly? Same.

[itonje]

hey sexy stranger who is not me would you like to talk about therese

hello sexy stranger who is not me i WOULD like to talk about therese aka theresa but i changed her name a little bit cause it didnt sound like. idk french enough

anyways therese florien is louis florien (oc)'s younger sister and also the last monarch of the northern empire (actually when she became queen she was the last monarch of just the north because the south and the west had broken off by that point but we'll get to that).

in the main story, 20-30 years after all these events ill be telling later take place, samira and the rest of the continent know her as 'The Coward Queen/Tea-time Queen' because she only ruled for a couple days and immediately forsook the throne when the southern and ko'bi army approached the capital. currently, she resides in the florien ancestral home (summerhead) on the northern continent, and she's converted the castle into both a prayer place and a place where travelers and vagabonds and so on can stay for safety. and she's basically become like a priestess . long long long backstory under the cut

anyways . the first we know of her is that she's louis' younger sister, she's very religious, she's very timid, and she's very close to her father gareth...there are reasons for the last two that have to do with her late mother lorete. so like. louis is a sorcerer which lorete discovered when he was just a child (northern sorcerers are believed to be willingly practicing dark magic against their religion or whatever) and the florien family is already in some deep shit with the royal family (tldr floriens used to be the royal family, were deposed and murdered and so on and also gareth pissed off his cousin back when they were in their twenties or whatever, this will all be relevant later) and so lorete knew that her son would be taken away/the family wld be punished or whatever adn devoted all her attention towards her son and towards concealing his magic from everyone, including his father.

and when she gives birth to therese, her attention is still all lazer focused on louis, and gareth, who doesn't know why she's ignoring her in the first place basically raises his daughter alone up until lorete dies of an outbreak of plague or whatever when therese is four and then he's raising the eight year old louis AND therese alone. therese's timidity comes from both the paranoia her mother exuded when she was little, lorete's death, the fact that when she was young she saw a jousting accident involving her father in which a man died. her piousness comes from the fact that the only thing she really did when she was younger was pray and read while her father was out doing knightly duties (cough cough colonizing) and it provided an outlet for her to vent her emotions ab her upbringing

also, there's a conspiracy the floriens were involved in with a couple other families set up by gareth's grandmother to restore the florien family on the throne (re: louis would become king when the time came) so like even then everyone always gave her brother attention over her because they were convinced he would be king and she was just the second child they didn't care about. in this world like women are as eligible to inherit and own land just as much as men btw louis was just the eldest

anyways because of her very like. kind of stuck up religious nature, her fear, and because the floriens are already kind of pariahs her first friends are just louis' friends, charicle elaphin (the elaphins are a family close 2 the floriens) and the strange iloro girl whos in training to be a knight (kidlat, but her 'northern name' is claire), but they get along very well, making a little sort of friend group.

as the years get on, therese really keeps herself busy just by taking care of her, who's very infirm, and reading more theological stuff (like by her hero, her ancestor aveline florien who was a priestess and religious reformer) and even writing a bit of her own stuff. to the outside world though, her interiority is looked down upon and royal family supporters (ie, against the floriens) even spread rumors about her, like that she's a secret sorcerer or something (the florien family has always had accusations of sorcery flung against them, little do they know there is a witch in her family but it's her brother who's actually the sorcerer)

we mostly either see her thru the perspective of kidlat, who likes her but feels a bit alienated to her like how kidlat feels alienated by everything northern, or louis who is like. apathetic towards her like he feels some affection for her because they're siblings of course but he's not really close to her and he thinks her piousness is self righteous and finds her deep fear and timidity unpleasant to deal with...tho, his greatest resentment towards her comes from the fact that he's always felt his father has preferred her over him (he does btw. like louis isn't wrong lol)

anyways the royal family sets up a wedding for her because louis refuses to be married, and claims this is out of love for their cousins, but this is just really a ploy to royally piss off gareth by taking his other child away from his household (something they already did to louis), and therese is um. well she's very angry and upset about this, which louis (and no one else, except for her father ofc) doesn't realize until the day of her wedding when he's getting her ready. she doesn't want to leave her father and summerhead, she wants to devote her life to the Goddess instead of some random husband, and she, like the rest of the floriens incl louis feels very humiliated and cheated by the way she's being treated when she has the right to the throne, when she and co should be in charge....this surprises louis because. he didnt know other people had feelings. also at some point therese wants to ask charicle to marry her instead because he's very religious as well and he's gay so neither of them would have pressure to feel love for the other, but louis tells her to not do that by saying oh well he's half western you're a florien almost-princess which convinces her to not do that

anyways she does get married to this guy, and has a kid (eventually), but continues to constantly visit her own family and gareth dies of like. natural causes or whatever (also stress because of louis being a cunt asshole or whatever and therese leaving him and colonizer guilt and a bad leg infection and honestly the man had a lot going on tbh) which really really bums her out, louis also yells at her because again, poorly hidden resentment over his father's preferential treatment of her which makes her even more upset

also later on when the king is dying she tries to pray for him at his bedside but the queen, who again, does not like the floriens, gets mad, calls her a witch and devil or whatever whos killing him, tries to beat her etc, and finally therese has had it she's HAD it and her big joker breaking point moment is. throwing a shoe at the queen and calling her a 'very godless lady'

anyways later later after aeetes (yeah remember him) kills prince edouard, who was about to be crowned king, and the west, galvanized by the south breaking off and the death of the Sort of King, breaks off as well and starts waging war against the northern forces, the remaining northern lords are like. well shit. whos going to be in charge. maybe the floriens again? but..... louis has already ran off chasing after the deserter kidlat (and unbeknownst to everyone, has died in a tragic mysterious Axe Murder Accident) so the crown goes to...you guessed it....therese! anyways she's crowned, only of the north, which is the only nation the crown has juristiction over at this point, but when the southern and ko'bi forces annihilate the remainder of the loyal northern knights (many northern families have tried to start their own factions to try to reconquer the continent, even fighting each other..this is not working) and move up to take the throne a couple days afterward, her deep fear that she's always carried with her leads to her immediately forfeiting the crown and running away....

i wrote a little something from her perspective on her coronation, basically she believes that the goddess has put this in her hands for a reason, she believes and knows she's truly the heir to the great florien kings and queens, she's apathetic towards the (supposed) death of her brother because um. the way he treated her for all of her life, though she does feel a great emptiness now that he's gone, she wishes her mother and father were there to see her, but there's always that. undercurrent of anxiety and uncertainty she's always had. so you can kind of see what she eventually does coming from a mile away

[the-acid-pear]

Tumblr refuses to let me reblog the post again, so this is the second part of me reading the second btg book! ☺️

Still Chapter 211

Son on son violence

Chapter 212

This dude pretty cute ngl

Shit, rip

AAWW HIGH 5 🥺🥺

It's almost like they are a regular father and son 😭🥺💔

Chapter 213

Look how thigh those shirts are hehehoho 🥴

OYXITSITDITDLTD

Ooooh there goes my man Jyaku ready to kick some ASS

🥺😭💞

Baki really just forgot his mom eh, thought you were getting stronger for HER smh

Oh Jyaku vs Retsu? Nvm Jyaku i can only hope Retsu is nice w you

I like how most are like, confused over who to cheer for lmao

I know he won't make it but I'm cheering for Jyaku btw i like him more <33

Chapter 214

Love that title, can't believe Jyaku is gonna ask Retsu out 😍 /j

He really is just honest Igari

I love that he apologizes

Chapter 215

OJFOYDITDISTOTDG

HIS FACEEE THIS FUCKING CLOWN 😭😭😭

THIS IS JUST SO FUCKING FUNNY

Chapter 216

Burgir

GHZJDUDDRHD THEY ARE SOOO MAD

That smile so cute...

Jyaku is a king

Love it when Retsu throws that pose, though y'all know why

HDGSSGSGF you are coming to Japan wether you like it or not 🔫

Chapter 217

Finally Jyaku got serious too

WITH HIS TOES 😭

King is just obsessed i luv him

HEHE HAIRY LEGS

It does seem like Jyaku is trynna confess his love jfnshdshdf

Chapter 218

I remember i almost laugh cry with my dad when we saw this

His damn beard... 💔

THE HAND OF THE TRAITOR

He has a good point

They be calling my man Jyaku a masochist noooo yfjdhdgs

Chapter 219

Okay seems kinda into it <:/

Old man? He doesn't look that old Baki :/

That was so smart 🥺

Chapter 220

Retsu calm down please you are gonna break his back

Oh my god Retsu, oh my god.

He did apologize at least

Chapter 221

Damn dude be a little more gentle with him

Oh, get was picking him up, okay

FR FR

🥺🥺🥺

FARHDHDYFTH THE KINGGG

Chapter 222

I love how everyone completed him (except Yujiro but not surprising), these warriors are such a good team

I want to eat an apple too now

That was fast

I got distracted watching a vsauce react video sorry

Okay I'm glad a comment actually mentioned Sik

Chapter 223

Had to take a uh idk 5 hour break bc lights went out :/

Feet be fuming lmao

Ohhh that's a cool analysis

Chapter 224

What a good punch

That "please",,,

Poor Li man, having to see his brother DIE /j

No, Viêt Long, i have not been hit by a truck before.

Chapter 225

It's so funny how Jyaku lost bc he fought a main charac and only those win

Sad day for the Chinese citizens

Mf got tits in his back

This is gonna be so goodddd

Chapter 226

Look at the size of his tits, the slut

INSTAGRAM INFLUENCER POSE WOOO

These two are cool fighters

Chapter 227

Old man showing skin

His smile is so fucked up lmao

Chapter 228

Baki what the FUCK are you wearing?

I just remembered when Hana did a flip, that was so good

Retsu babey 🥺

I love how confused Yujiro looks

Chapter 229

Hey, i recognize that name...

Kaku just too op

Yujiro you are gonna pop your testicles if you do that with your leg

Chapter 230

God that's such a good threat

Love Retsu's confusion

Damn bitch you saying we gotta keep up w this whore cuz you were too slow? Ffs Kaku 😢

I love when you can tell someone is still hanging around just quietly by seeing their response in a comment

Chapter 231

God this just feels so good, to see Yujiro actually scared 😍

YOOO THAT'S POG

Chapter 232

I wanna finish this book and start the next one grrr

This fight is so satisfying

That last bit is so cringe but whatever that's okay

Fight so controversial comments were deactivated

Chapter 233

Itagaki hincha de boquita el más grande? 😳 /j

Okay yeah it IS just rude

Hohoooo shit getting nice

Chapter 234

This asshole lmao

Yuji-chan really went "how many times do i have to teach you this lesson, old man?!"

Mfs be doing Jojo references in the comments lol

Chapter 235

GTFO WITH THAT LOGIC RETSU IM SORRY CHINA IS LOSING BUT GET LOSTTTT AJSGAJGS

Ffs Kaku you are doomed 😢💔

Yujiro so strong my mouse disconnected

Chapter 236

Abs in his back...

Crying and shaking that is NOT true

DON'T FEED HIS EGO, KAKU

LIONS CAN BE KILLED BY TIGERS TOO!!!!

I thought Yujiro was bleeding for a second there smh

Chapter 237

OKAY YEAH IT IS HIS BLOOD ITS COMING OUT OF HIS NOSE ITS NOT MUCH BUT HE BLED

THE HEAD APPLAUSE

HE'S SO UPSET LMAOOO

Yujiro surprised is good shit

GSJDUFTHSTD

KAKU YOU LEGEND LMAO

Kaku has boyboss energy

Chapter 239

This cover almost gives me a stroke

I love how they all just shat their pants

These minor Chinese characters were so good tbh, sadly i don't think they will ever return

Don't worry Retsu, we the viewers have seen a man revive before

King i don't think any of us understands

It really is

CAN MEN IN THIS FRANCHISE JUST OPEN BOTTLES REGULARLY?!

Oh my god i though Yujiro was sitting on the air for a second i almost cry 😭

Coca cola must have paid Itagaki /j

Chapter 240

Oh so the Kaioh part takes the name, not the surname

...is Yujiro wearing a floral shirt? 😭

I LOVE THAT ENDING SO MUCH 🥺😭

Jyaku has his eyes fixated on Retsu eh, proud of having him come to Japan lmao

Chapter 241

HORRIBLE fit Baki

CHILDHOOD SAGA PART 2? 😰

Jk though i do miss Yuri 🥺

Oh hey Jr

You gonna fuck his girl, bro?

Chapter 242

So straight forward lmao

I'm starting to appreciate Baki's feminist ass every day even more

AAAA GRANDPAAA 🥺🥺💞

This page didn't allow me to call two mfs virgins smh, 1984

Chapter 243

Grandpa they shrunk you

Chapter 244

Kings idc about this

Okay true but also he's 70 dude pls... Though idk if this guy will go thru worse than Jack lmao

Such a nice lad

Chapter 245

Baki being such a feminist icon is so meaningful considering how his parents were,,,

MY MAN IS BACKKK AND AS DAPPER AS EVER

Doppo he's called Ali Jr how are you surprised?

OH MY GOD I JUST REALIZED HIS EYE PATCH HAS A PATTERN THAT'S SO COOL 🥺🥺😢💞

These men love throwing their glasses eh

Chapter 246

If only Igari and Toba had done this lol

OKAY THATS COOL I LIKE THAT

Me lo re devaluaron a mí pelado eh

HEHE OOOOH NICE 😳

Scenes that give me a boner

CHU...

Such a good callback...

Chapter 247

My man got serious, sweet

Doppo has been trying out his luck a bit too much like he's been betting with his life an uncomfortable lot like king do you need to talk? Are you okay? First asking Gouki to kill him now this like, is everything alright Doppo?

YEAH A BIT FUCKED UP TO THINK ABOUT

I love that blocking technique

OSHWOWHIWWH "gay ass Orochi, out of option so he touching dick" SHUT UPPP 😭😭💀

I really wish he got kicked in the nuts again see if he's still using his technique

Chapter 248

Poor guys thought he was bout to get murdered

A kiss? 😏 /j

When i saw this in the anime i actually thought Orochi was going to die, i was gonna get sooo angry

Chapter 249

What a way to cockblock em

Feminist icon

Jack is that the only sweater you own?

Chapter 250

I have been thinking of that scene of him eating the whole steak a lot

Jr like 🥺

Imagine being stupid enough to tease Jack like, i get he defeated two masters but they are NOTHING compared to this monster

Imagine jack just smoked some weed right there lmao

Jack needs to bite people more

Chapter 251

My shitty ass son gave me parkinson's

Jack that's not how human anatomy works what the fuck did Kureha do to your body spine?

Chapter 252

DAMN JR WHAT A FAT ASS

Looked like Jack was going for a handful

Those techniques must fuck your neck up so bad

Okay Jack you are going a bit far now don't cha think?

Chapter 253

You are tempting your luck sunny boy

Look at that, you pissed him off!

You cannot just know out jack hanma bro

HHH

This was so stupid yet, unironically, iconic

Chapter 254

Bruh i thought it said Pog 😭, ain't manslaughter poggers Mr Hanma?

OKAY THANKS JACK

Such a simp he downed that coffee cup

Grandpa put here cockblocking

Chapter 255

"no he didn't >:/"

These two masters are a pair of fucking idiots like understand this i love my grandpa and i love my man but mfs have to take the L for this one time sksgwjgshgw

Gouki bro my senses gonna shut down if you put your sucks against the dirt again OUGH sensory hell 😭

FOR FUCKING REAL JR

STOP ENABLING THE OLD MAN!! WKSGKSGSJSHDD for once I'm on Viêt's side 😭

Chapter 256

Hoho Gouki out here getting a panty shot 😳

Grandpa i love you but this was unnecessary

Chapter 257

Kozue should wear a Korn tshirt

GET HIS ASS KOZUE

OWHWLWGISGSJWG 😭😭 MF JUST STANDING THERE LIKE A FREAK I LOVE HIM BUT I HATE HIM SM!!!

Love how consistently round his hands are, king got no knuckles

HEY DONT CALL MY MAN A FREAK KOZUE

King hasn't changed his clothes ever since i see

His shoes look so nice...

OKAY OKAY HE HAS A POINT AT LEAST, HE AT LEAST ACCEPTED HE LOST BUT HE'S STILL BUTTHURT FROM IT SKSGAJGS BUT HE ADMITS IT!!

Doppo i love you but shut UPPP you lost get over it!! You are just going for the rematch bc you have the higher ground against a injured guy!!! Like Shibukawa didn't have time but you were already getting serious!! Hhhgrrrrrr doppo i love you but I'm going to bark

Hehe nvm he still hella fine... keep talking king 🥴

This was so mean of him sjsgwjwg

Chapter 258

Low-key starting to believe these two mfs plotted against Jr sjshsj

THAT FACE AKSGWJGS just 😐

If i didn't know you would get your ass handed in a plate i would be a lil mad he's planning on being that savage

He has been thru worse, sunny boy

Niceee

Tbh. I don't care anymore. Doppo is in the wrong, but GOD I'm a simp and i love seeing him fight 😍😍🥴

Yeah a comment mentioned it, we all were on Jr side until he threatened to kill Doppo Orochi like, even if not everyone here is as horny as me we all like an og fella

I also love how the prisoners really changed them all, the scars (both physical and mental) those 5 left will be remembered lol

[flutter2deceive]

Inspired by @everybodyknows-everybodydies recent ER dream posts, I figured I'd share some of my ER dreams from the past year. I text myself whatever i remember after waking up from interesting dreams so that's the grammatically incorrect format they're in lol

buffy out on the streets moving vans with her strength, timothy olyphant is a vampire and he and his vamp buddies need romano to inject blood back into his circulatory system so he can go out in daylight again, they're taunting him like "come on didn't buffy train with you for a week to be a surgeon before giving up?", idk

The coolest stop motion video ever of this ER drawing turned into a storyline, mark leaves i guess jennifer and is running down the hallway to someone and i'm curious to see if it will be susan or elizabeth, it's elizabeth but then the pov switches to susan and she continues running down the hall to the trauma coming in and she high-fives abby and it's like the main point of contact for all the friendly characters when they do something cool is to high-five, watching this whole thing run thru and have the absolute biggest look of gleeful wonder on my face, i say some very nice words and hope they make it to whoever the author/vid marker are

In a steam engine room like that titanic ep of newsradio, there were also demons, so hell??, then there was a thing about carter being gay and in love with his best friend but then he called me lisa (which is my name) but i took that to mean that it was actually dave and it was a whole thing about maura tierney's fake ex-boyfriends?, and carter was out in my parents' front yard confessing his love but he accidentally stepped in the path of a chainsaw and the top of his toe got chopped off so then he was in a wheelchair

Kerry and elizabeth talking about sandy and mark and how they dread talking to henry and ella about them without breaking down, but it's also like they're still there, and then it's kerry and mark having the same convo but it's mark talking about his dad, they're in the hospital bathroom, a scene where sandy is temping in a library at the hospital and arizona robbins also working there and the implication is that they used to date, arizona comes up to sandy's table and notices that she seems to be doing wedding planning meanwhile kerry is sitting by herself at another table, arizona is judgy about what appears to be sandy chasing a girl who's in the closet and ashamed, sandy explains that kerry doesn't know and it's a surprise which is why she has the flashmob people standing 2 deep around kerry's table so she doesn't see the minister bringing the shrubbery in (this never happens in the dream but also what?? lol), then kerry has a successful hip replacement surgery that luka performed and mark is telling everyone about it, susan and abby were just starting to feel out a relationship and were making out in the bathroom

The er hospital but housed in an amalgam of my workplace and childhood church, i guess i'm like an orderly?, corday is pregnant and examining a patient and she's like ready-to-pop pregnant but she's still insistent that she's good to work until she's 8cm dilated and she's only 6 right now, we're all like dude go up to ob now, she's doing like yoga stretches on the floor to alleviate pain but still insists she's fine, meanwhile her patient is like ???, her water breaks and romano is gonna take her up to surgery, there's a space issue at the elevators and only he can fit, me and the other orderly say we'll take her up on the gurney in the other bank of elevators, we go flying down the hall and yelling for people to move cuz mrs corday's-- "sorry, dr. corday's"-- water broke, we get stopped by a security guard who won't let us through and then stopped again cuz there's construction in the warehouse, somehow romano manages to get lizzie but me and the other orderly are locked out, go to a bar downstairs to wait and nick kroll is there and he alerts everyone at the bar to the fact that he found several fan art/fic hits for "nick kroll/luka kovac" on the company's subreddit, he seems oddly intrigued, how weird of a pairing

In the future, there are no doctors because they're all burnt out from covid so healthcare in the future is just holograms of scenes from er but they're not the medical scenes they're the relationship drama stuff, alex kingston is named ceo of brain things due to her time on both er and doctor who, an interviewer asks what her favorite katy perry song is and romano answers for her, then maura tierney kicks everyone's ass at a banquet

The specifics elude me but somehow abby made it so that neela's memories of gallant's death are erased, and he's not exactly alive but also not dead, maybe she went back in time and changed something or had magic?, but neela is now texting with michael who is actually abby with his phone pretending to be him, abby is feeling really guilty for playing around with life and death and neela's feelings when she didn't have a gameplan, she ends up telling weaver she did something extremely morally questionable, now the two of them have to think thru how to handle the situation, neela is concerned now cuz michael texted that he'd talk with her at 23:00 but he hasn't called yet, then there's this really annoying intern that's pissing all the docs off, weaver starts to say something and ppl think she's gonna tell this woman off but she's like "this is an intern that's working here? She should be the hospital's lawyer", and then abby and susan smirk at each other and put on a tie? Idk but i think it's a different reality than the gallant-still-alive one

On a road trip or something and get back to abby's apartment, i may be susan but also possibly just me, we get the luggage from the car and while abby is trying to find her keys to unlock the door, we hear a noise from down the alley, the blonde woman that luka had been flirting with is near the luggage and is drunk or high, we wrestle with our conscience on whether to help her, she ends up asking to crash on the couch, abby and i get her inside and on the couch, we then end up sharing the bed and giggling

Caring for romano while he was in the hospital, mei lin from top chef is a med student and robert keeps insulting her, i think i might be corday, order a butterfinger and bottle of water from the hospital convenience store, go back to robert's room, he's muttering about the salad they brought him, i ask if he wants me to tell the nurse that he wants them to leave the salad for when he wakes from his nap, he squints up at me and smiles, says that his coping mechanism for stress is egg salad, idk

Living an ep of ER, i am susan, walking to my car alongside elizabeth, we're kinda tensely discussing when the kids will be at each of our houses for the holidays, i say let's just fuck it and join our celebrations, it's like a thing as if mark actually used to be married to susan and had a kid, don't know if it was supposed to be little suzie or rachel, elizabeth smiles unexpectedly and my heart kicks up, get in our cars and drive off, i am fumbling with a cigarette and the lighter from the car, drop them both as i'm driving down the hill out of the hospital parking lot, but now i am abby and have the season 9 hair, keep talking about this guy coworker i'm secretly seeing but it's actually susan and i'm trying to throw people off the scent, and there's something also about trixie and katya in this part of the dream but i don't remember specifically what, maybe guest star patients?

[angeltrapz]

ok saw asks!!! bcuz i have Amanda on th brain rn i wd like ur take on her interacting w Lawrence? personally idk how much she knew of his involvement bc she implies in 3 tht Lynn was entirely John's choice, but i also think th idea of her Knowing + deliberately not telling Hoffman is extremely funny. Hoffman cant come 2 th weekly disciple meeting bcuz hes got Cop Business so he misses Lawrence's introduction + Amanda is just like "sure John of course ill tell Mark that we got a new friend :)" and just never does. LOVE that thought

dhgsdkj thank u!!

it Is extremely funny 2 think that she just. knows but refuses to tell Hoffman + THAT'S why Hoffman doesn't know who Lawrence is until he jabs him w the needle + takes off the pig mask lmao omg. just like "oh yeah of course I'll tell Mark we have a new teammate don't worry abt it!" and she Never Does dkjkdsg??

okay but 2 Seriously answer yr question. when I think abt it I always think that like. it wld b pretty hard fr John 2 keep them frm each other given how integral Lawrence's participation is in every game from SAW II onward? 'cause like we know Amanda helps w the kidnapping process + placing them in their traps, which one CLD argue would only mean she wld see them after Lawrence would do his thing but. I feel like she'd be vaguely aware? bc she wld also then have 2 know that he survived his game, given that she helped set it up - we know that she'd AT LEAST know his name.

to elaborate on th idea that only HOFFMAN doesn't know (both bc it's fucking hilarious + actually how I view things happening jdkhfksd), I feel like Amanda + Lawrence's interactions wld be rather limited. in canon, Lawrence becomes a disciple after John "rehabilitates" him or whtever he wants 2 call it, but I feel he'd have to be aware of Amanda, too - both that she is also a disciple + SHE'S th one who helped get him in the bathroom in th first place. as grateful as Lawrence seems to feel toward John + as much as he believes in John's "work," I feel like that wld be smth he'd have to work thru: working side by side w someone who had a direct hand in basically destroying yr life as u knew it. n I feel like Amanda wld know that, n as such she'd want to keep her distance bc she can't predict how this man will act/what he will do, even if he is technically on her side. so like. things wld def be tense btwn them until Lawrence has had some time 2 process his new life + what tht means for him, and until the two of them can have some sort of talk/acknowledgement of that.

though I will say that their roles kind of imply they'd at least see a good bit of each other. Amanda scouts, in a way, helps subdue & bring ppl in, which wld then be brought to Lawrence fr any medical procedures they feel r needed (such as sewing th key behind Michael's eye in II) so it'd definitely be like a "hey did u bring some1?" sort of thing. Mark is muscle of course so like I know he def helped on tht end (I believe Amanda is th one who caught Lawrence in the parking garage but like it wld be SO much funnier if Hoffman was the one crawling around) but IDK if he rly Saw Lawrence bc. Cop Business. so he'd just kinda b like "here u go" n bring ppl to Amanda n then peace out 'cause he's gotta keep tht reputation of Respected Detective. we know he also might've messed w traps themselves as well (like The Rack in III), which wld definitely keep him separate from Lawrence bc Lawrence had No Involvement in designing/setting up traps. tht was strictly a John/Hoffman/Amanda endeavour.

as fr how they'd feel abt each other? it's really dependent on how u view thm as characters. Lawrence, after he becomes a disciple, believes that what John is doing is truly helpful and truly has the capability to change lives; he devotes himself 2 it, shows countless times tht he has complete faith in John + his methods, so much so that John left a tape fr him telling him to look after Jill + to act on his behalf if smth were to happen to her. he calls Lawrence his greatest asset. his trust in John + the Jigsaw legacy is unwavering.

Amanda, however, has been shown several times to act directly against John's beliefs, such as constructing inescapable traps (Kerry) or rigging others' games (Adam). th breakdown she has in III I think showcases the disconnect between her love fr John as a mentor/father figure, and the realization that not only is John entirely hypocritical and doesn't stay true to his own beliefs half th time, he truly has shown no regard fr her safety + has only been using her to further the agenda that was built upon a fragile foundation 2 begin with. u've mentioned this b4 too but John always liked 2 say that if u can anticipate the human mind, then nothing is up 2 chance - which wld mean that he KNEW Xavier might throw Amanda into the Needle Pit to get out of it. he KNEW Daniel was just a fucking kid and was perfectly fine w putting him in very real danger to get back at some1 he felt like needling fr the express purpose of provocation and nothing else. he KNEW Laura, a woman she'd formed a bond w and pretty much swore to protect th minute she woke up and saw her crying in the corner, could begin to seize n choke on her own vomit and die in that house. he knew all of those things, ENCOURAGED the belief that smth was wrong w her because she wasn't "fixed" as he had claimed, and it's so unfortunate that she doesn't realize that sooner (I fully agree that she deserved to lose her shit completely on John. it's what he deserved! it's what SHE deserved!!!) but she still Does before she dies (which, again, I Don't think should've happened. she didn't deserve 2 go out like tht + she deserved so much more of her story being told).

so there's the conflict of beliefs between thm. I think Amanda definitely starts out like Lawrence does, completely devoted + believing every word John says, but thru II we can see that certainty begin to falter n her faith in John is completely shaken by the end. I don't think Lawrence wld Know she felt tht way until after she died, if he ever finds out at all, bc I doubt that's smth she'd want to express. it's not even smth she discusses w John himself until III, in which she's already made up her mind to shoot Lynn as a final act of misguided disobedience. I still think tht Lawrence wld feel fr her in some way, though, bc even b4 he became a disciple he was rather horrified when Sing + Tapp had him sit thru her testimony; his feelings would change on this a lil, bc he'd see it as her rebirth (as she once did too), but I still feel like he'd want 2 like. watch over her a little. not super directly, + not because he felt threatened by her presence or anything like that, but because they're in this together n I'm sure John's told him abt some of the circumstances regarding how she came to be a disciple after her game as well. I feel like he wld definitely be saddened by her passing, bc I feel he'd come 2 respect her at least a bit, but fr him it's like. they have 2 keep moving. John is gone now too, smth I'm sure was probably a pretty huge blow fr Lawrence, and now he has to put his energy into making sure Hoffman stays unaware of him. just in case he has to act on that warning John gave him abt Jill. but he wld still miss Amanda n wld mourn her, to be sure.

I don't think they'd be close or anything like tht. kind of just friendly coworkers who only see each other every once in a while, passing thru the doors of each other's lives with a nod and a wave and maybe a greeting if they're feeling up 2 it. they're not too involved. Amanda can't tell u tht Lawrence's favourite flowers are sunflowers. Lawrence can't tell u tht Amanda's favourite smell is lavender or tht her favourite colour is a deep, almost greyish purple. but they're connected thru John, thru their work, n that still means smth to both of them, at least in some manner. when Amanda dies, Lawrence grieves. Jill pays for her headstone n Lawrence makes sure to bring fresh flowers every once in a while, but he has to hold his head up n keep walking. now tht John's gone, there's work to be done.

and someone's gotta keep an eye on Hoffman.

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issue 36

time travel arccccccccccccc yessssssssss

I have been waiting SO LONG to reread this arc hhhhh yessss

starting off strong with the sexy roller cover. nice

I love the disconnect of ‘orion pax: outlaw’ compared to the last time we saw him in shadowplay where he was orion pax: supercop

he’s still punching people for JUSTICE or whatever so I guess not much has changed

oh my god this is the issue with the many many two-page spreads...the first time I read this issue I didn't realize that was a thing and GOD I was SO fucking confused. there's already a lot going on in this issue/arc but this made things so much worse hvbhjkdfbsk. I powered thru and still managed to understand most of the arc despite reading half this issue out of order (essentially) bc the website I read it on split the pages up and I couldn't tell they were supposed to be doubled (and also I'm dumb so I didn't figure it out)

anyways, the actual issue...windcharger is out here using his powers to rip a dudes arms clean off. wow!

and there's skids getting punched in the face. Ls

and glitch! a totally minor character of course...

MANNNNN I SO adore the panel of all the lost lighters appearing in a cloud of purple smoke, all posing epically....SO fucking good, peak sci-fi coolness vibes, A++

as usual jro killing it w/the titles, ‘elegant chaos’ is such a great name for a time travel arc

also reading the tfwiki has shown me that many of jros titles are song or album titles, to which I say - that's epic and I love it. with jro doing it, I feel like it straddles the line between referencing music and the very fanfic-esque ‘title things after music’ vibe. I love it

oh god I forgot they use bs cybertronian time units in this sometimes lmao...I mean of course they do but still like, what the fuck is a cycle. is that a day. I feel like these words all have no meaning/the meanings change drastically depending on continuity. I cant keep up and also I'm lazy and don't care enough to try

I love rodimus did u know

poor riptide looks so confused lmao

IS....IS REWIND PIGGYBACKING TAILGATE...THATS SO FUCKING CUTE....I cant fully tell bc of the page layout but ooomg so precious. minibot buddies

whirl saying ‘chuff’ just reminded me how british jro is hvbhakjhdsfbs sometimes it just Jumps Out in mtmte and I'm like Oh God Britain Is Real

I really like the mtmte approach to time travel and paradoxes and whatnot. its just complex enough to be interesting but not too convoluted that it bogs down the story. perfect sci-fi fun!

mannnn chromedome talking abt brainstorm :( I'm sad abt those two hhhhh

and I love how at this point, nobody in the cast ACTUALLY knows brainstorm well enough to know what he’s really doing - including chromedome, who’s ostensibly his closest friend, somebody he’s known for a while - and even the readers don't really know what he’s up to...I like the mystery tbh

cant believe rewind wrote orion pax’s biography, omg. completely forgot abt that detail

cd saying ‘I love it when he talks history’ about rewind....hhhh I love cdrw so muuuuch

godddd the line rodimus says abt whirl - how they need people like whirl around who are ‘happy to get in the way’ of danger and death - that shit haunts me man like...rodimus is basically saying that he’s bringing whirl along to potentially die in place of someone like orion pax (nevermind the fact that whirl dying would ALSO fuck up the timeline)...like, how deep does it go?? is he saying that bc he knows whirl has been trying to get himself killed for a while now, or just bc whirl likes violence? mannn I cant...the character intricacies...man

anyways...I love rodimus he’s such an interesting character. you have that fucked up moment and then in the next panel he’s saying ‘if you want to call it a time phone, I wont stop you’ about the quantum walkie-talkie. he has the RANGE

oh and then rodimus casually volunteering chromedome to do mnemosurgery on anyone who might accidentally find out about them time traveling, which is again fucked up on multiple levels. the raaaaange

vjaksbhdhfusajbfdjk that panel of the lost light squad just standing there like idiots reminds me of that post where someone said abt that panel ‘these characters have a collective 3 brain cells’ or something hvbjadkfnksfdl

rodimus IMMEDIATELY breaking his own rules by trying to reassure pax that they're good guys by pointing at his autobot badge, even tho the autobots DONT EVEN EXIST YET at this point...my boy PLEASE go purchase some brain cells from the store 

and the fact that rodimus introduced himself to pax w/his real name...shouldn't he go by an alias or st??? that seems like a good time travel rule since optimus and rodimus definitely know each other later 

and like, did they not anticipate that some of the people in the past would recognize some of the lost lighters hgbajkhdjfnjksf like cd and whirl get Instantly recognized...great job guys

they are all SO bad at this hvbahskjdhfbasjkf I cantttt luckily for them the orion crew is handing them easy alibis 

‘the dugout’ is that a baseball reference????

also I love the scenery here, the bg looks like rock but there's metal piping and stuff running thru it, its so cool...really adds to the whole ‘cybertron biomes are made of metal’ thing

‘ancient history’ rodimus are you KIDDING ME-

cyclonus time travels to the past and IMMEDIATELY finds a window to stare broodingly out of. icon

tailgate thinking orion pax is SUPER COOL continues here from shadowplay and I love it...tailgate is so cute

and the tg saying ‘don't you think that's awesome, cyclonus?’ hhhhh so cute

one reason I love this arc so much is that this is the arc where the gay Really amps up 

TRAILBREAKER.... oh man ;_;

are you telling me that this outlaw base they're in has ONE bed for all of these people. what the hell vhbaksjhfnsal

cant believe rung sampled roller’s steroid juice box

also cant believe robot steroids exist. except yes I can and I love it

oooh roller’s a 0/1%er? I forgot abt that 

cant believe orion pax just grabs some random phone that belongs to these weird new people and answers it. WHO does that

goddddd megatron and orion’s conversation....destroy me

HHHHHH like...the HISTORY....the regret...the missed opportunities...its all so palpable....goddddddd

and of COURSE, the whole thing is steeped in tragedy...the ideological differences that will become the foundation for a 4 million year long war...megatron, who believes that you need to burn things down and start again to really make change stick, and then orion, who says ‘reform is the answer, not revolution’....AUGHHH the intricacies. mannnn

‘you sound lost’ 😭😭😭

‘its tragic.’ yeah, that about sums up their relationship, especially at this stage and in this continuity 

anyways. [cries about old man megatron talking to young naïve orion pax] goodbye

AUGHHH and then we jump to rodimus ONCE AGAIN breaking his own rules and trying to save trailbreaker...IT HURTS MAN...god I love rodimus, I feel like him being broken up about crewmembers like trailbreaker dying is one part regular sadness over people he knows dying for tragic reasons, and one part personal guilt at someone under his command dying, even if he’s not involved/at fault. I love the dichotomy of this emotional reaction that comes only partially from empathy/emotion, but also comes from a kinda self-centered need for success as measured by people under your command staying alive. and taking into account rodimus’s life it totally makes sense that he’d act like that...GAH I love it. the complexity of it all!

orion pax saying ‘you should read [megatron]. it’s powerful stuff’ I'm screaming, so many LAYERSSSSS

I fucking love time travel AHHHHHHHHH like the opportunity for interactions like these....chefs kiss

‘hey, best friend! miss you!’ rodimus is such a shit hvbdajkfksjhfd 

‘very sus’ rodimus ahead of his time w/the among us lingo

oooh and then they realize that the senate is trying to kill the sparks...gotta save the babies!

tailgate scolding cyclonus for bluntly stating that you'd wanna be subtle when killing newborns...hhhvbhsdfhhhhhh I love them sm

ooooh and rewind has an interesting suggestion - that the senate is actually trying to irradiate the sparks into being outliers...rewind is so smart I love him

and the fact that he’s using history from his database...love it

rodimus sending cyclonus and whirl out like pokemon

ROLLER NOOOO DONT GO OUT THERE

also wow this is literally the 5th (I think) double page spread in this issue...the confusion I felt the first time I read this...lmao 

and now this is literally one of my favorite issues so I'm glad I know what's going on lmao

oh man rodimus telling cd not to erase trailbreakers memory even tho that could jeopardize the entire timeline... :( 

oh man I didn't even notice but roller getting debris blasted into his face like that makes the whole ‘roller is tarn’ theory even more legit considering tarn’s face scars....

‘tighter the better’ hhh don't say that orion. but also, that’s the companion phrase to megatron saying ‘the deeper the better’ hvbhasjkhdfbaksjlf

I do love the semi-campy action hero antics that orion pax gets up to. its just so fun, even when the stakes are high and things are serious

‘this is the greatest thing I have ever seen’ tg ily

THE REVEAL THAT THE SPARKS WENT TO NYON...so rodimus just saved himself, basically...time travel is so trippy

GODDDD ND THEN TRAILBREAKER...HVHHHHHh 😭😭😭 THATS SO CRUEL MAN

oh man that last panel of trailbreaker holding up roller’s juice box...iirc the first time I read this I thought that was roller (cause of the juice box I guess? idk I'm an idiot) so I was like oh ok he must've come back or something. very much related but I didn't really think about tarn being a particular pre-established character and totally didn't read the whole ‘roller is tarn’ thing that was going on 

which in my defense ruth also didn't pick up on any of that while reading this and eventually like 2 issues before the reveal I had to prompt her like ‘you should maybe be wondering WHO tarn is’ vhbahjksdfbaksjdf

so! issue 37! this issue is a solid favorite of mine, id say definitely top 5 or even 3. I'm super biased bc I fucking LOVE time travel, it’s seriously one of my favorite tropes ever, and this issue hits all the time travel beats I love. characters traveling to the past and interacting with people they know! conversations that have multiple meanings bc of TIME TRAVEL! trying to save someone who meets a terrible fate in your future! fun time travel action! the time traveling characters being generally terrible at hiding the fact that they're time travelers! ITS SO GOOD. 

and I love the clever way everything is tied together here - where we get a nice continuation of shadowplay, with this taking place shortly after that with a lot of the same cast, and time travel classics like the good ole ‘if we hadn't travelled back in time and done what we did, the future we came from wouldn't have existed at all,’ in the flavor of ‘rodimus saving his baby self’ and ‘rodimus NOT saving trailbreaker’ and ‘everyone forgot about roller :(’ 

ok but like, did the lost lighters just go ‘oh well, guess rollers gone now.’ like they DID realize that the outlaw crew would have no idea what happened to him if they got their memories erased, right?? did the lost lighters figure that since roller never reappeared after this time period, that was how history was ‘supposed’ to go and they shouldn't mess with it? am I overthinking it? as usual: yes, probably. I love overthinking about comics, in case that wasn't obvious

basically...I love this issue soooo much. so so good and a bunch of fun tropes that I love. I mean the whole arc is like that for me since I love time travel so much. so I cant wait to (re)read more!!