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queer-starling · 5 years

Note

Flower ask: also all of them. you get to suffer with me >:3€

oh darlin’ we’re in it now huh

Alisons: Sexuality?

homogay

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

she/they | all gender will be shot on sight

Amaryllis: Birthday?

sept 23rd

Anemone: Favorite flower?

monkshood

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

stranger things or ghost adventures

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

like? distance? a couple miles probably

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

“We are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little lifeIs rounded with a sleep.” William Shakespeare, The Tempest

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

wild cherry capri sun

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

ima change that to ‘kiss the last person u thought abt kissing’ bc YES

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

*jenna marbles voice* hell yeah!!

Baneberries: Favorite song?

waiting for the end - linkin park

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

chaos

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

i have too many to list !!! brandi, kasey, you, liz, ivy, nick , just to name a few!!

Begonia: Favorite color?

blue uwu

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

foxes !! and opossums

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

night time babey

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

either a fox or an opossum or a raven, i think

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

i wanted to be a vet !!!

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

theyre ok as long as theyre not screaming and/or mine

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

i don’t liike vomit bc. nastey (trauma i think) and i don’t like old ppl well. i dunno why? they’re just so old and fragile and helpless and sometimes they’re really mean and idk i think it’s like something to do w death or something LMAO idk. also i just hate the idea of becoming old and having to rely on other people ?? hhh

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

i was bullied a lot

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?

realistically? probably playing dead by daylight with my girlfriend ADFSGRHYUTR

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

happily taken

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

ireland, scotland, alaska, greece

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

whenever my friends or family tells me they love me but esp when u text me goodmorning or when we say our goodnights sorry im gay haha

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?

i have. uuuuhh 6

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?

no!!! i want some tho :(

California Poppy: Height?

i think im like. 5′5 or something? give or take an inch ?

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

oh absolutely. my house is haunted as we speak

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?

bmth hoodie and pajama pants w foxes all over them. i just woke up lol

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

yeah i always keep one on in the bathroom

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?

my sister bc she came home from college yesterday

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

ask me in like. a little over a month from now ;)

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

FONT??? the animal crossing font

Columbine: Are you tired?

oh absolutely

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

thanksgiving, christmas, seeing my gf, magfest

Coneflower: Dream job?

idk if it’s a job but i just wanna own like. a ranch that takes in all sorts of animals and takes care of them

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

introvert

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

ooooh yeah

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

i mean. depends on what they want/need. distance wise? i’d travel the known universe for u

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

he was a plaid teddy bear his name was Stanley!!!! i miss him :( but now i have Little Moon God as my favourite stuffed animal

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Libro

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

Working in Yellowstone is something I’ll never forget

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

well. hmm. i was gonna say flying to yellowstone but maybe driving to north carolina by myself bc driving long distances alone to places i haven’t been before gives me hella anxiety (i’m better now)

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?

i don’t pay rent in this house to listen to their opinions lmao.

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

you, i think, when we said goodnight last night!!! EDIT: you this morning!!

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

being bad at dead by daylight

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

dead by daylight

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

(little over a month now but uhhh) GOT A UH ......GIRL.....FRIEND ...... GOT TO VISIT GIRLFRIEND ........ and got the windshield finally replaced in my car

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

i dont know! so far ive laid in bed now im at my computer answering this. not too bad. my shift is only 4 hours today.

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

for the most part, i’m pretty content, yeah

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

MOVE OUT

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

my friends, my mom, my sisters, my girlfriend, my bastard dog

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?

metal

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

what does this mean. physically, i’m very affectionate, i just. don’t show it alot bc anxiety/i overthink. that and i constantly tell ppl i love them and what they mean to me

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

whoever is reading this

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

wake up next 2 a cute girl. take way too long to get up. go climb mountain w cute girl. vibe on mountain w cute girl. go to waffle house 2gether. gome home and vibe. play video games or watch a movies/tv w cute girl.

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?

i like to make art or play bideo jame

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

oh gosh i dunno. the ones i’ve known the longest are kasey and brandi, and i’ve known them both around/over a decade i think. we met in middle/highschool!

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

you, ivy, liz

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

so many

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

idk man but i remember when you said u had a crush on me and then i posted a selfie and u were like ‘OH NO SHE’S CUTE” and like ??? idk i think that was definitely the first compliment to ever shock me LMAO

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

6.9/10

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

my tattoos

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGGViLwHEUk

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

i liked to play zombies ate my neighbors on the sega genesis !!!!

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

eliza !!!! we lost touch a few years after i moved away :(

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

ima be real everything makes me feel guilty

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?

aaaaaa the whole abi/moon incident

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

my name is fox. it means i like foxes

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

northern virginia babey !!!! that place fucking sucks!!! but everyone who lives up there thinks they’re hot shit.

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

i had a bunkbed and i think the walls were pink

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?

😬 i’m just gonna say i’m much happier now and i’m coping with life and shit a lot better

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

she’s sweet and funny and i love her so much!! she always does the Most for everyone, sometimes to the point where she isn’t concerned abt herself and i see where i get it from. but yeah my mom is great, my dad doesn’t deserve her

Onions: Tell about your dad.

source of a lot of trauma and why i have so many issues regarding men. i don’t wanna talk about him anymore LOL he doesn’t deserve the attention

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

my dad’s mom is becoming senile and i think she’s racist and queerphobic. my mom’s parents disowned her a few years ago so we don’t talk to them anymore

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

i dunno. i don’t try to remember my birthdays. whenever i can go to busch gardens for my birthday i usually have a lot of fun there.

Peony: What was your first job?

if you don’t wanna count working w my mom as a florist, target was my first job back in 2016. i found my name tag the other day , actually

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

WELL, i know you followed me on here first. and then twitter?? but we didn’t really start talking until stranger things 3 came out (thank u stranger things) PHYSICALLY, we didn’t meet until fursonacon (haha. i remember when u texted me that u got to the hotel and i came down to help n i saw u unloading yr car and it was then that my brain was like OH NOOOOOOOO and my heart was like OH YEEEEAAAAAAAH)

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

physical, mental, or emotional? i play a video game or listen to loud music

Pink: Where is home?[

somewhere in appalachia i can feel it in my stupid soul

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

idk man i’m pretty content w where i’m at now so

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

chester bennington

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

i have a waife and we have many great pets and we live in a log cabin in the mountains or in a nice victorian in a small town or something IDK but we’re happy and that’s all that matters

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

God

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

my mom, me best friends, my girlfriend

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

my girlfriend’s laugh because it’s THE cutest shit and then when she giggles??? oh my heart

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

oct 23rd, 2005, we brought Fat Boy Zack home !!!!

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

July 22nd, 2016. i was 2200 miles away

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?

to be holding my girlfriend >:(

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

hhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

those i hold dear

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

enough, i guess?

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

my girlfriend

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

it’s fucking BORING and TOO EASY and they don’t pay me ENOUGH but i can get away with so much shit there so ima still go, ima still go

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

all of the flannels currently in my possession

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.

mountains, woods, forests, cabins, autumn, cryptic, occult, victorian, edwardian

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

if someone gets me a gift i’m legally required to execute them

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

this 40hr workweek i got coming up

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

i have not read in So Long

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

Moved out away from here lol, we’ll see

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

i’m a furry

that was SO LONG im sorry i also put you through that but THANK YOU ENJOY READING ILU

#littlecation #ask #long post

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lightdrabbles · 6 years

Text

title: amo

pairing: brian kang/youngk x female reader

disclaimers: explicit language, smut, drinking.

genre: fluff&smut.

summary: your favorite band was finally touring, unfortunately for you, you were driving to another city to see them, and none of your friends even liked them. fortunately, however, while at the bar, you find yourself befriending a guy in a somewhat similar situation.

authors note: i’m currently listening to “amo” by bmth which is what inspired me to write this after seeing the prompt. also uh don’t go home with strange people at gigs ig ??? i’ve never have a bad experience with them at the gig but yeah. also this was not re-read through so uhm.

word count: 3.4k what the fuck

your rings hit the side of the plastic cup filled with water, forgetting your fake i.d at home before you drove to the busy main city a few towns over, you were currently stuck on water. you’d much rather be drinking a vodka and cola at this point, after meeting your fave band, and watching the crowd fill the barrier. you should probably head over there to score a decent place in the crowd where you can’t get hit by a crowd surfer but also have a good view of the band that you dedicated the past three years of your life to.

as you turned around from the bar to walk to the barrier, you hear someone speak to you, “hey, sorry, but are you here alone?”

you look up from the cup, to the man speaking, raising your eyebrow, “sorry it’s just you give off the aura you’re here alone and my friend has basically just ditched me for one of the girls working backstage.” he rubs the back of his neck before notioning to another guy, who waves at him, giving him a thumbs up, and you take a look at him. he’s highkey attractive, and you wonder why he’s talking to you, “also i kinda hate mosh pits alone but i also love them and need someone to participate with me.”

you smile a little, holding back a laugh, if you were with this strange guy, maybe you wouldn’t be so scared of standing in the crowd. “i actually am, all my friends hate this band.”

this time he raises his eyebrow, “hate them? 3racha are one of the best upcoming rock bands of the late twenty tens.”

“that’s what i said!” you almost exclaim, and he laughs.

“i’m brian, you want a drink?” he asks, notioning towards the fully stocked bar, and you bite your lip softly, nodding your head.

“___, nice to meet you. i’ll have a vodka and cola.”

you watch the bartender prepare your drink, while he opens a beer for your new friend. after you receive your drinks you make your way to the small crowd to watch soundcheck, the doors for general admission would be opening in about forty minutes, so you had time to enjoy the music while being around the second row.

after soundcheck was over, you had about twenty minutes left to talk to brian, and he was the one who sparked up the conversation first, motioning towards the tattoos he could see through the band shirt you had cut the sleeves off, and tied at your waist and the high waisted, black, leather mini skirt. “what’s the story behind these,” he motioned, first towards the roses that layered your left arm, and you proceeded to tell him a story about how you were lost as a child and roses helped you home.

as you waited for the first band to head on stage you found out he was in his own band, with jae, the friend who had “abandoned” him, he loved travelling and was currently studying in his masters at college. you’d have to remember not to mention you had just started your first year; he’d totally find it weird knowing you were nineteen.

finally, after what seemed like hours, the show had began. the first opening act, riot fever, had managed to storm through their set, even with the venue still filling up, and nobody singing when they asked for it during one of their songs. as they finished and the stage was changing over for the next act, 15&, brian’s attention was pulled away from another conversation you were having about how friends suck.

when his attention was back, he looked down to you and started to speak, pushing a backstage pass to your face, “maybe friends don’t suck,” he laughed as you took the pass.

“how the fuck?”

he looked over at jae, who had his arm around a girl, “you see the girl he’s been talking to all night? part of the crew, not just the backstage staff.”

that made your night entirely. you reached to grab the pass from him but he moves it away from your face before you can, “no way, little lady. how do i know you’re not about to take this and find another guy? hm. gotta prioritise myself.” he tells you over the music playing in the background; as he speaks your favorite song comes on -- drown by bring me the horizon. you wanna scream the song out at the top of your lungs but your attention is on the man in front of you.

“why would i do that?”

he taps your nose slightly before you find yourself being pushed closer to him as people gather closer to the barrier, you wanna yell at the person who pushed you, but when brian wraps his arms close around your waist and whispers, “hey, i got you, it’s fine.” your anger just melts away.

15& played their set, and finally 3racha were due on. the group of 5 members had been your safe space since you were sixteen, now you finally get to see them live. during their set, you had helped multiple crowd surfers and had been pushed even closer to brian. there was something about his manor that made you drawn to him, so when the lead singer, chris, came up to the mic and asked everyone to turn to the person next to them and give them a hug -- a sign of respect for each other, your heart pounded in your chest, as brian grabs your shoulders, pushing you towards his chest and into a hug. the embrace warm, and you lean your head on his chest before you break out of the hug.

it happened fast, when his lips found yours, surrounded by people in a sweaty concert, you lost yourself. “damn, we got a couple of love birds in the audience right now,” the bassist, felix, had yelled, gathering your attention as you pulled away from the kiss. the way his hands lingered over your waist, just above your ass made you wonder if he was trying to go further with it.

you looked at the stage, as people cheered, a blush forming on your cheeks, your ears burning red with everything that was happening. “let’s dedicate this song to you two, then,” felix said into the microphone as they started to play their latest single, “XO”.

the rest of the set felt different somehow, brian never moving his arm from your waist, making sure nobody kicked you in the head when crowd surfing. and finally 3racha had finished their show, the venue leaving.

brian turned to you, as everyone headed to merch, “so backstage?”

you bit your lip softly, looking at the time on your phone. you hadn’t planned on staying in town, but hopefully making your way home before midnight. it was only eleven, but if you went backstage, there was a big chance of more drinks and you’d have to pay out for a hotel or sleep in your car.

on the other hand; here was an insanely attractive man, who had scored you backstage passes to your favorite band. “backstage.” you nodded your head.

he smiles brightly, “want another drink before we go?”

you nodded again and the older man walked back to the bar quickly, seeing his friend jae standing there with his arm candy. after a few moments he turned so he was facing you again and motioned you to head over. dragging your feet to the bar you stood next to him as he pulled his arm around you, “jae, chungha, this is ___.”

“hi.” you smiled. your drink was passed to you by the bartender as he filled up a tray with shots and various other drinks, you took a small sip before making a face at it. “jesus christ,” you muttered.

“too much vodka, not enough coke?” the female, chungha said, smirking a little.

“something like that,” you replied, almost laughing.

brian looked at you, “sorry,” he whispered into your ear as chungha had grabbed a few bottles of beer before jae grabbed the tray.

“backstage?” she asked, and the two of you nodded. “i’m just gonna say the boys get hella rowdy after a show and tonight’s was insane, so if they’re loud, or try and beat each other then, well. yeah.” she said as the four of you walked past some members of the crew backstage. brian’s arm never leaving your shoulder as he occasionally sipped on the beer in his hand.

tonight was definitely going down in the best nights of your life. chungha had passed beers to a few members of the crew before you had reached a room backstage. “we’re probably gonna be here for like an hour before the guys go out to meet fans and i think they wanna head to a club or something afterwards. maybe they’ll just hang out in the bus with some music, extra booze.”

brian pulls you down onto a sofa as you enter the room where three of the members of 3racha are already sat. “oh,” he whispers in your ear, “i totally lied by the way,” you raise your eyebrows. “i kinda know the guys.”

you look around the room, taking a sip from your drink, you try to steady your breathing.

“god i’m out of it,” chris said, grabbing a shot of tequila from the tray and downing it as he ran a towel through his damp hair. he looked at you, then brian and laughed softly, “hope he’s treating you right, honey.”

you take another sip of your drink, pulling your legs onto the couch, and leaning against brian, “what’s that-”

“ignore him, ___. he’s been like this since highschool.” he mutters, rubbing his fingers over your arm. you look up at him as he looks down at you, smiling softly.

maybe the fact you had 2 glasses of the mixture swimming in your gut, but you wouldn’t mind if brian had asked you back to his place; wherever that may be. “you’ve been there through everything with 3racha, then?”

he nods his head, “mhm. helped them write their first few songs,” he tells you as felix opens up a bottle of beer, but instead of a normal way - he slams it against the table, breaking the glass, causing everyone to look at him. felix wasn’t even twenty one yet, and here chungha was, feeding a starting alcohol habit. you couldn’t really say much, you were nineteen and on your second drink of the night.

“jesus christ, felix.”

“shit, i’m fuckin’ sorry. gross, i smell of beer.”

“yeah that’s what typically happens when you smash a bottle of beer. dumb fuck.” changkyun, the drummer, said, slapping the boy on the back of his head.”if yunho or jooheon saw that they would’ve locked you in a guitar case.”

“how would i even fit into a guitar case?!” felix almost shrieks in anger, and changkyun just gives him a glare - an almost evil glare.

as if by magic the last two members of the group walk into the dressing room, seeing alcohol sitting on a tray in the middle of the table, they both grab a cup of something, before they see the glass on the floor. “jesus, who did that?” jooheon says, rolling his eyes and taking a seat next to you.

okay ___, stay cool. one of your favorite guitarists isn’t exactly sat next to you right now.

he stops drinking the alcohol in his hand, looks at you then chris, then brian and back to you, “uh hi?”

you turn to him, “hi.” you reply back, brian’s arm gets tighter around you, now leaving your arm and sitting on your side. you turn your attention to him, after he puts his beer glass down, he places his fingers under your chin and pulls you into the second kiss of the night. this time it’s more heated as music starts playing in the dressing room.

if your mother could see you now, she would probably scream at you. call you a whore, or something else. she didn’t even know you were out of town that night, thinking you were with your friend, jamie. the kiss gets more intense, fast, his tongue pressing against yours, his teeth occasionally biting down into your bottom lip.

“dude, if you’re gonna makeout with her take it to the tour bus, i’ll give you the keys and you can use the back room.” yunho almost throws a pillow at the two, as brian pulls away. he pulls off his bandana holding back all the blonde hair, and throws it over at his friend.

“shut up,” he says, pressing another kiss to your lips, but this time it’s soft and sweet. he leans down to your ear, whispering, “i’d love to take you back to my place, but only if you’re okay with it.”

fuck yeah you were okay with it, inside of telling him, you respond with a kiss of your own. hand grabbing the back of his neck, holding him as close to you as you can.

for the next hour, you find yourself listening to music, getting to know the boys of 3racha, and drinking. while occasionally locking lips with the man you had met only a few hours ago.

they agreed to drop the two of you off at brian’s apartment, only twenty minutes away from the venue, and even though you dreaded leaving your car where it was parked, you didn’t want to risk the idea of getting into a car accident. plus it was already two in the morning.

when the two of you are finally in the apartment, you immediately take off your shoes, holding the red heals in your hand, you feel brian hold onto your waist. “so, we can order a pizza, i have some more booze laying around, or we could get to fucking first and i can take you out for breakfast tomorrow.” he whispers in your ear, leaving a line of soft kisses down the back of your neck, your hair had already been pulled into a bun the minute 3racha had entered the stage.

you turned your body around, “hm, pizza, sex and alcohol? sounds like a plan.” with your answer, you kiss him again, lips feeling like heaven as he taps your butt softly.

“any allergies i should know of?”

you shake your head as he gives you a small tour of the apartment, leading you finally into the bedroom. he looks you up and down, untying the bow you had at the bottom of your shirt, before pulling it over your head and kissing your lips again. his hands find themselves tangled in your hair as he pushes you down to the bed. “fuck the pizza, i need you first.” he says as he manages to push his way out of the skinny jeans on his waist.

quickly he pulls down your skirt, hands gripping at your thighs. you were always insecure about the way they pushed together but his eyes latched onto them, marking them with hickies along the inside. you mentally thanked yourself for shaving last night. and shaving everywhere. he moves up to your face, kissing you softly again, hands trailing down the bra straps before he eventually unclasps the back. “sit on my face.”

you gulp a little, sobering up somewhat with his words. you shook your head a little, your bra still covering up your breasts. “i - i can’t.” you tell him.

raising his eyebrow, “it wasn’t a question, babydoll. sit. on. my. face.”

you hesitate but find yourself adjusting your position and sitting on his face, to put it blunt. his hands grip at your underwear, the faded pink lace. you didn’t assume anything was going to happen that night, so you weren’t going to throw on your good pair of matching lingerie. brian bites down on your left thigh, but softly, enough to leave another mark not to the point of actual pain. he pulls your underwear off, snapping the band. “sorry,” he whispers into your thigh, throwing the pair of busted panties to the side, “if you’re a good girl, i’ll buy you some new ones.” he teases before going straight to the gold.

his tongue flicks over your clit, his fingers digging into your thighs, leaving bruises. he warms you up before his tongue enters you, exploring the new area. you lean your hands against the headboard of his bed, nails digging into it. using one hand to keep you still, brian’s fingers find your clit this time, slight pressure added as he uses two fingers to rub it.

you weren’t a virgin by any point, but it had been so long to the point of you could’ve came from any dirty talk.

his mouth moves away, “fuck, you’re so damn sweet.” he mutters, before his mouth is back at your entrance. you needed something more to feel a stronger orgasm, but at the way he was going, you were about to cum.

“i’m gonna - shit,” you mutter, feeling your legs start to plummet, “shit.” you repeat. breathing heavy, your throat felt dry as brian pulled away again.

“you gonna cum, baby?” a smirk is present on his face as you look down at him, nodding your head. “good girl.”

the second his tongue latches itself back around you, you feel the waves in your stomach as your orgasm approaches you. brian helps you ride it out, and helps you off him, laying you down on the bed, your bra now long gone too. he pulls his shirt off, your hands immediately going towards running down his stomach. another kiss is pressed against your mouth as he lets you catch your breath. “you did well,” he tells you, a hand pressed against your cheek. “the place that’s open at this time takes forty minutes, i’m gonna order it and then i’m going to ruin you.” he kisses you again, before leaving the room.

you sit up on your elbows, going to your bag that was thrown near the edge of the bed to check the time and see if your mother had called your best friend yet. aside from a few twitter and instagram notifications you had barely anything to see. it was closer to two am now, you knew your mother was about to kill you if she had seen the snapchat stories you had been posting all night. you had various notifications from your friends on that app, and as you were about to check them, the male walked back into the room.

“you ready, sweetheart?” he asks you, as you lock your phone, looking up at him and smirking. your phone gets placed on a bedside table, and before you know it, brian is pushing you back onto the bed, leaving hickies over your neck, throat, both your breasts and down your stomach, god, you were going to have a hard time explaining this to your family but in the moment, you were in bliss.

he grabs a condom from the bedside table, ripping it open with his teeth and slides it on, his boxers long gone. it doesn’t take him long before he has himself lined up, and pressing against you, your faces pressed together in a deep makeout. your hands dragging along his back with every thrust he made. your lipstick long gone, and your eye makeup smudged already. he stops for a second, taking your appearance in.

“what?”

“nothing, you just look beautiful.” he tells you, and you find yourself blushing before he continues his pace and speed. it continues for what seems like no time at all, as you fall deep into the mattress. “you tell me when you’re close, babydoll. i wanna hear you scream.”

fuck. those words sent you into oblivion, “god, i’m gonna cum.” you mutter only a few minutes later, to which he replies with a bite of your earlobe. after you let out a string of loud moans, and curses, he emptied himself into you. the pair of you sweating, looking at each other.

you shut your eyes for a split second, but wake up to brian pushing one of his shirts over your torso, and telling you the pizza had arrived.

“do you wanna go out with me sometime?” he asks out of the blue, as you’re halfway through a slice of pizza. you swallow and nod your head, smiling at him.

“i’d like that a lot.”

#day6 scenarios #brian kang scenarios #day6 smut #brian kang smut #youngk smut

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b00bconnoisseur · 6 years

Text

60 questions for @not-my-brain

1. selfie.......Ugghhhh ok. Imma take one rn

Ok here u go (yes thats a bmth shirt)

2. what would you name your future kids?.....Ooo hmmm well when i was a kid i really liked the names disney, and mesiah. I didn't know at the time that mesiah was another name for god i think lol. I liked it cause of handlers mesiah. I still do. Ooo and maybe Tj too

3. do you miss anyone?......Yeah. My friends on Pinterest from a year ago. My friend lucas. Stan lee. Bob ross. My cousin who died from cancer some years ago. Snape. Sirius. Lupin. Tonks. Dobby. *continues to name every unfortunate death in hp*

4. what are you looking forward to?.......SE-YA next month!! Its the south eastern young adult festival at this college. You can have meet n greets with authors and alot of stuff its the besstttt

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?......DEFINATELY. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @sammchenry my friend lucas and @septembersbloom. ^^

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?..... What like...romantically? Or like a death? If romantically uhhh idk it took over a couple weeks but im ok now. Ive never had another relationship so idk. If death oof yeah idk maybe. Ig it depends on how much i knew them idk. Like when my nanny (great grandma) died i was sad for days (is that alot?)

7. what was your life like last year?.....Sucky af. Still is. But the highlights of my life last year was getting and making friends on tumblr, going to the tøp concert and going to warped tour, volunteering at the library, going to seya and meeting some of my favorite authors, reading, changing and improving my art, listening to all the bands i listen to now, getting into more fandoms, going to a friends house for the first time

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?.......Yes lol. Some years ago when i couldn't find smtn id be so annoyed and pissed id start crying. I dont now but still lol

9. who did you last see in person?.......Hm ig family doesn't count....? Wait do u mean a friend? If so uhh my friends rebekah, anika, and Judah at a TAB meeting at the library sometime last month.

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?......I think so? Like i mean I can hide whenever i get my....time of the month from my mom (talking abt stuff like that with her makes me uncomfortable) and i hid a breakup. And other p big stuff too. So imma say yeah

11. are you listening to music right now?........*pops on earbuds after reading this* yee im listening to bitch lasagna by pewdiepie xD (do i have the best spotify playlist or what?)

12. what is something you want right now?.......To hug @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye but SOMEONE has to live so far away

13. how do you feel right now?........Happy that my earbud still works cause they got washed in the wash yesterday....oops. Its not my fault. I told my dad to remind me to take it out of my jacket pocket before they threw it in but noooooo he forgot

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?.......Uhhhhh fuck idk it was probably from my lil 4 yr old bro sometime last week. Other than him (hes my favorite sibling) i dont let them hug me too much

15. personality description.......Nerdy. Fangirl. "Emo". Tomboy. Hotsause obsessed. Book lover. Music lover. Black. Blue. Harry potter. Introvert. Fall. Sports. Values friendship. Loyal. Uhhhh i cant think of much lol

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?.......*sigh* yes. Yes yes yes. Theres some things abt me, or my life really, that i havent told anyone on here or my irl friends that i sooooo want to so bad but i haven't cause i feel like they'd feel bad and pity me and i don't want that

17. opinion on insecurities........I dont really understand this one. Everyones insecure abt something. Is this askin like if i think its ok or not? I say its ok. Im insecure about literally everything about me. My face. My personality. My socialness. My art. What i do. What i say. Basically my whole body. The things i feel good abt are my books, music taste, and my friends (ily fuckers)

18. do you miss how things were a year ago?.........Hmm this time around a year ago....idk its sorta the same but all the stuff i mentioned abt my year from last year didn't happen yet so nah tho my life sucks rn its better than this time last year

19. have you ever been to New York?........Nooo but i want too soo baddd i wanna visit @septembersbloom !! Im coming for ya soon gramps *does the eye watching thing* my dads been to nyc before tho cause he does construction and he had a concrete job to do there. It was a 23 hr drive for him

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?........Uhhh idk!!! So hard! Maybe.....the whole thats the spirit album by bmth ;)

21. age and birthday?.....15 yrs of age and September 27th 2003 (whats yours brainy? I'll put it on my calendar)

22. description of crush......Its weird idk im not sure if its a genuine crush or not but uh....They like hp :).Thats all u get

23. fear(s).......Losing my best friend @dirtysocke and my other friends. Death. Failure. Momo chasing after me then killing me slowly keeping my eyes open to look her dead in the eyes while i die

24. height......5'6 call me short and I'll fuck u up with THIS *pulls out trusty potato peeler named now steve* dont test me boi

25. role model......Hhhhhhhh so many! But uh gosh one of them is @superraedizzle (youtuberrrr) and vexx and bob ross and da vinci and aaaaaaa so many

26. idol(s)......First person that immediately comes to mind is @sammchenry cause he's super cool and he's really nice and his art's reallyyy good (if u havent seen it w-w-what are u even doin with your life?) And he has a great sense of humor and *continues to ramble about why samms the best*

27. things i hate.......Dabs. Transphobes. Homophobic ppl. Basically any hate on the lgbtq+ community. Bullies. The ship starker. Umbridge. Snape haters

28. i’ll love you if….....U you'll eat pizza, draw, and rp harry potter with mee

29. favourite film(s)......Fantastic beasts. Every hp film. Twilight. The maze runner 1-2. The hunger games. Spiderman homecoming. Kingsman: secret service. Into the spideyverse tho i havent seen it yet

30. favourite tv show(s)......Inkmasterrrrr. B99. The mick. The middle. Uhhh idk mostly ink master xD

31. 3 random facts........Ive never had shrimp. I had a beta fish for over a year once. Im eating pizza crust rn

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?.......G i r l s. I have all girl friends irl and one boy. And on tumblr it seems like i just meet girls? Likei agree with @cristal-kyd1280 its like alot more gals then dudes here. But i do have some guy friends on here too. But mostly girls

33. something you want to learn.......TO DRAW ANATOMY DAMMIT

34. most embarrassing moment........Every moment of my lifes an embarrassing moment. Idk of i can pick a "most" embarrassing one. But one time i i sent my crush (now ex bf) a hey fuckface and like some hearts or whatever for an ask game that meant like "i have a crush on u" "youre adorable" etc and said Hewo but i did it all anonymously. But he confronted me askin if i sent it cause im the only person he knows that actually says hewo lol. Then later on i finally admitted i really liked him and well y'all know the story after i think. Unless you're new

35. favourite subject.......A R TTTT OFC

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?........meet my friends on tumblr. Get into mtsu (college i wanna go to) and study art. And go skydiving

37. favourite actor/actress........favorite actor uhhhhhh probably thomas brodie sangster or tom felton and my favorite actress? Hmmm idk maybe evanna lynch (luna lovegood)

38. favourite comedian(s).......probably kevin hart lol he's p funny

39. favourite sport(s)........basketballllllll and football

40. favourite memory........uhhhhh idk?? One oh my favorite memories was when we went to see tøp in concert

41. relationship status.....single as a pringle

42. favourite book(s)......harry potter and the order of the pheonix. Harry potter and the half blood prince. Simon vs the homo sapiens agenda. Divergent. Maze runner. Twilight. Fangirl. Fallen. Red queen

43. favourite song ever.......TOO HARD DONT MAKE ME CHOOSEEEEEE

44. age you get mistaken for.........16 and 17 sometimes lol

45. how you found out about your idol........i was watching someone on yt and superraedizzle always poped up in my feed and my mom turned on one of her vids cause she always saw her vids too now ive seen most of em i love her. Id heard of vexx but never watched him and i was watching a collab from anthony miller art and shrimpy and i checked out shrimpys channel and was lookin at comments and alot of ppl said his art is like vexxs so i checked out vexx. At first i was like eh ok. Now i cant click fast enough when he posts a vid. And i actually fpund out about bob ross from my grandpa on jan 20 2017 when trump was getting sworn in or whatever. We turned on pbs and my grampa told me to look and bob ross was on and i was IN. I loved it. I even started watching full episodes on YouTube of the joy of painting after that. Wonderful man. My first painting i ever did i think was when i followed one of his tutorials xD (i didnt know it was popular at the time)

46. what my last text message says......."ok your turn"

47. turn ons.....uhh nerds ig idk um book lovers, music lovers, art lovers, potterheads, idk and nice ppl

48. turn offs......jerks. Homophobia. Idk ig whatever i said in things i hate

49. where i want to be right now......uhhhh idk wait didn't i already answer this? Ok this ones different ig so uhh with my friend lucas

50. favourite picture of your idol.....oh shit...favorite? Idk xD i have a fave of vexx but not of rae or bob. But heres pics of them any way

51. starsign......a libraaaaa boiii

52. something i’m talented at......drawing and speed reading. Thats about it lol. Oh and procrastina

53. 5 things that make me happy.......ooooo art, my friends here on tumblr, books, harry potter, and music ^^

54. something thats worrying me at the moment.....if my friend thinks im being annoying

55. tumblr friends......hhhhh so manyyyyyy. @dirtysocke @mysisterlooksforthisaccountsobye @cristal-kyd1280 @chinesewaffles2 @kingantlion @queen-baelin @sammchenry @septembersbloom and more

56. favourite food(s)......green beans, pepperoni pizza, and vanilla madelines

57. favourite animal(s).......basically any reptile. Puppies. Cats. Any animal really but my #1 are snakes

58. description of my best friend.....well she's a tiny bean (5 feet) and she has dark hair, she wears glasses, she doesnt take shit, she's in love with Josh dun, she's awesome, funny, nice (YES youre nice jackie) and shes the best friend ive ever had. Oh. And she has a weird obsession with spaghetti

59. why i joined tumblr.......well i heard abt it on Pinterest over a year ago but didnt want it. Then @mrfastbass-deactivated20181231 on DeviantArt said he got tumblr so i made one then followed him and figured id just post art and that's it cause i thought tumblr was boring as hell when i first got it. Now im p much obsessed with it

60. ask me anything you want.......go ahead brainy shoot. Give me smtn good

#my face #mutual peeps #not-my-brain #asks #60 questions

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franeridart · 7 years

Note

Happy 1000th post to one off my absolute favorite artists on Tumblr!

This is it!!! The 1k post on this blog!!! It’s me finally getting my ass into gear and answering the asks in my inbox!!! As good charm in hope of not waiting so long from now on hahaha thank you so so much, by the way!!!! :D

Anon said:LITERALLY YOUR TODOROKI IS THE BEST THING IN THIS CRUEL WORLD I LIVE THE WAY U DRAW HIM IM EMOTIONAL HHECK ALSO ALL THE REST OF UR ART IS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD ITS SO NICE UR CHARACTERS ARE LIKE VERY LONG NOODLES THEYRE GOOD™

THANK YOU FOR EVERY KIND WORD AND ESPECIALLY ABOUT THE TODOROKI ONES HOLY SMOKES!!! I don’t draw him much sadly but he’s super fun and comfortable to draw for me, it’s nice to know he also comes out well!!!

Anon said:So like,,, I really miss your bokuroo ;^; Will you ever post with them again???

I haven’t taken a vow that forces me to never draw them again, so, possibly! At the moment posting for the haikyuu fandom is giving me more sad feelings than anything else though, so I can’t promise that’s gonna be any time soon, I’m sorry

Anon said:bruhh i listened to that chiodos song under ur halo, and that one by memphis may fire that was w that bakugo art that was called not enough and uhhhhh ur music taste is dope care to share some more songs?

SURE I’m glad you liked those! Everything by Memphis is A+ and I love it so if you haven’t you should check out more stuff by them ( No Ordinary Love is super nice, That’s Just Life is very dear to me and so is Divinity, Speechless is… my otp song for every otp ever tbh) - Bring Me The Horizon is my fav post-hardcore band and both MMF and Chiodos are that genre so if you don’t know them give them a try! (Blasphemy, Run and Doomed are between my faves out of the latest album, and since you liked Under Your Halo you’re probably gonna like Follow You too) the album right before is amazing too if you’re okay with less melodic stuff, but the further back you go with BMtH the harder to listen to they get, just a heads up - Sleeping With Sirens are on the softer side of post-hardcore lately, Fly, Left Alone, Trouble, Fire and Empire To Ashes are some great ones, between the many, and, uhhhh, at this point I might have recced Nothing More a hundred times but let’s make it a hundred and one, try Funny Little Creatures, Do You Really Want It and Go To War out of the newest album! If you’re into punk and female voices you should check out Tonight Alive too, Jenna has one of my two fav female voices in rock right now (Crack My Heart and Temple are the latest two songs out!) and since I always rec stuff but I never rec anything by my favorite band ever, you ever heard of Alter Bridge? They’re more towards hard-rock/alternative metal, but check out Blackbird, Fortress, I Know It Hurts, Cradle To The Grave and Broken Wings just to make it one for every album I really, really adore this band and everything they ever made

Anon said:I adore all of your art, especially your bnha art!!! I had so many of your drawings saved to my drafts before I read the manga and was really looking forward to catching up so I could look at them all!! They’re all fantastic

AHHH THANK YOU!!! This made me smile lots, I’m so glad you like them!!!

Anon said:What’s coming up? Fluffy, dorky or angsty? (I’m talking about your next work XD just to be sure) Have a great day my friend!

LMAO this was about this one right? I’m sort of a fool honestly cause as I drew it it… didn’t feel actually all that angsty to me? I mean, obviously it doesn’t come after anything happy, but they’re working things out! Making an effort! Loving each other enough to try and understand each other better!! I drew it as something positive but in hindsight I should have expected the reactions lmao so I honestly dunno, I feel like telling you it’s most probably gonna be something happy but as it seems I angst without even realizing, lately #rip

@not-enough-kaneki said:Pass the happy! 💛 When you get this, reply with 5 things that make you happy and send this to the last 10 people in your notifications! 😊

!!!!! my cats!!!! tea and coffee!!! Bakugou and Kirishima and Bakugou-and-Kirishima and the squad!!!! not having an headache!!!!!! the sound of ocean waves and the sun on winter days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! new music I like!!!!!! nice asks and lovely tags under my art!!!! that’s more than five things but a lot of stuff makes me happy tbh !!!

Anon said:one of my favorite parts (i love every bit of it) of the holiday pic you drew of the squad, is they each have their own personal mug. 10/10

I didn’t think you’d be able to notice Mina’s!!! I’m glad it was visible, I thought I had made it disappear into the background hahaha thank you!!!

Anon said:i just went through your entire kiribaku tag and, honestly, gay (also ur art is soooo good and pure and thank u so much for all the content u make for bnha 💖💖)

It is very gay, isn’t it? The other day I was going through my old stuff and I think I might have slowly turned them mushier oh my hahaha I’m glad you like my stuff, by the way!! Thank you so so so so much!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Thank you for sharing the beautiful Bakusquad Christmas! It’s very colorful and warm & it gives me such a comforting feeling! I love looking at all the details! Kami & Sero’s ribbons, everyone’s mugs, the decorations, all so cute! Especially Mina’s bulletin board with the photos, charms of the boys, & the little alien dude (?) Each time I look at it, I see other cute details!! Sorry to bother you, but thanks again for sharing your art with us! I hope you had a very Merry Christmas!!!!!

It’s not a bother at all!!! Thank you so so much for looking at it long enough to notice all those details!!!!

Anon said:You are so good at giving advice omg

I wouldn’t say I’m especially good at it, I just say what was useful to me lol but thank you! It’s a nice thing to be told

Anon said:Dude, your bakusquad drawings are awesome! Keep up the great work!

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!! I’m super glad you like them!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:The new chapter made me think about Bakugou dealing with his squad as babies all over again. Toddlers would probably be worse.

Depends?? Actually??? Like, at least toddlers aren’t gonna steal his gauntlets and tell him he’s lame and punch him just for the hell of it and be a bunch of smartasses and assholes like. Compared to this bunch of baby-Bakugous he has to deal with in the new arc maybe the squad as toddlers would actually be refreshing lol

Anon said:Um I have a very real crush on ila? Can we please know more about her??

I’m ??? so happy you like her!!!!! I don’t wanna say too much about her cause until I draw her in comics I won’t be too sure about who she really is, but she’s!! a pianist, very tall and sorta insecure about her physical appearance, very soft spoken, incredibly gay, scared of sensory deprivation of any kind. Her full name is Ilaria! Dav calls her Aria, which means air in Italian~ they’re pretty good friends, I have a comic about that I’ve been meaning to draw…

Anon said:So, you like KiriBaku with songs, so what do you think of You Had Me At Hello by A Day to Remember? Particularly the lines, “What have I gotten into this time around, I know that I had sworn I’d never trust anyone again, but I didn’t have to. You had me at hello. I’ve never seen a smile that can light a room like yours, it’s simply radiant, I feel more with every day that goes by.”

s o f t…………. ;; also incredibly fitting considering Bakugou decided Kirishima was his new favorite hero the second time he spoke to him, like, god bless I love those two s o m u ch this one I’m listening to it right now and having feelings (is it Baku to Kiri? Kiri to Baku? why not both for double the feels)

Anon said:Hey Fran!! Have you been keeping up with haikyuu? If so what do you think about the Miya twins? (Personally I think they’re pretty okay, they’re funny when they interact with each other. My favorite of the two is Osamu haha)

I don’t mind them! My fav out of Inari is Kita tho, have to admit - that said I have… sort of been ready for this game to be over for months, now………………

Anon said:Okay but imagine….. Kirishima with freckles

I’ve drawn that, now and again!!! the latest one was this one, and another one I remember is this one :D I’ve been liking the idea of him with freckles even more since it’s become official his hair isn’t naturally red? So now and again I add them in, even though they’re usually not much noticeable haha I do so with Bakugou too from time to time, actually… and the rest of the squad… I just… love freckles a lot… haha

Anon said:Love the squad, love the squad kisses.

HECK YES the goal is to draw at least one smooch for every couple sooner or later !!!

Anon said:I hadn’t even realize that I stuck around for a whole year OwO, anyways, congratulations! Your art style has improved much more than you think, especially since you’ve gotten more into coloring ^o^ I noticed that you’ve also been doing more complicated poses too, so, it’s the little stuff that counts ♥️👍 Hope to see more spontaneous art next year, love you Fran!

THANK YOU SO MUCH I love you lots too??? honestly??? This ask means the whole world to me, I really can’t see much improvement after all but knowing you can DOES help a whole damn lot

Anon said:So I came across this fanfic where Uraraka and Todoroki were a thing. I’m personally not a fan of this rare pair, but the whole scenario was the cutest thing ever. Todoroki basically asks Uraraka to help him confess to Midoriya, but in the process falls in love with her instead.

Awwww that sounds cute! Can’t say I have any particular feelings about the ship, but I am up for Todoroki with nearly anyone so why not!

Anon said:Bro bro bro I’m sorry if this is the wrong channel to go through or something but holy shit I just spent hours going through your entire tumblr and your. Art. And. Concepts. I… can’t??? DUDE YOU’RE AMAZING AND YOUR TATTOO AU!! I?? Just thank you so much for all the awesome work you do honestly made my entire fuckin week with your blog, you are WICKED GOOD AND FUNNY AF. That’s all I got go on with your day you talented ass fiend

I’M CRYING!!! OH MY GOD THANK YOU!!!!!!! I’m gonna pick this ask and frame it right on top of my desk!! The heck!!!!!!

Anon said:Why is Bakugou such a fuckin meme

The real question is why is everyone in class 1A a meme. How do they even keep up. How much of the shit they say on a day to day basis is actually just catchphrases from other 1A kids repeated over and over again. How much of the deadpan ridiculous shit Todoroki says has become an inside-joke. How many 1A kids move and talk like Iida just for the hell of it. How often do they yell DIE at inanimate stuff when it pisses them off. How much stuff is defined as manly even though it has nothing to do with manliness. Do they say “going wheey” instead of “frying one’s brain”. Can anyone outside of 1A even understand them when they speak at this point.

Anon said:You are amazing human bean and I love you 💖 Keep being great ✨👏

Thank you??? ;O; I’ll do my best!!!

Anon said:Just annonly passing by to tell you I F'ing love your take on Ashido And the Kids XD … Way to much fluff And laugh for my heart

THANK YOU!!! I’m happy I can make you laugh!!!! :D :D :D

Anon said:I love you god bless you and your art! THANK YOU!

NAH THANK YOU FOR BEING THIS NICE!!!

Anon said:Hi! I absolutely /adore/ your BakuKiriKami art! I was wondering if you had any headcanons about them/what inspires you to draw them?

More than headcanons for them I have an incredible amount of scenarios I’d like to see them in! And when they’re compact, complete things I usually draw them, which is what inspires me really haha that, and seeing them interact in the manga! Lately I’ve been really drawn to Bakugou and Kaminari’s friendship, actually, so the romantic stuff has fallen in the background while my mind is preoccupied with thinking about them as platonic good pals ahhhhhhh as soon as I’ll work through it I’ll probably get back to drawing them as romantics, that’s just how my mind works lol

Anon said:I love the casual clothes you design for MHA characters! And I really enjoy reading your headcanons-always creative and fun! Is there anything you’d add to anyone’s hero costumes in class 1-A (something that might prove useful/practical for them, or something you’d add just for the heck of it)? Sorry if this is a stupid question or if you’ve answered a similar question before. Thanks for your time!

It’s not a stupid question, don’t worry!! But I generally like to leave myself in Horikoshi’s hands for this sort of stuff, since I both enjoy the costumes as they are AND don’t want to be disappointed in case what I hope for doesn’t actually happen - that said, I’ve mentioned before that I’d really like Aoyama to get redirectors for his laser on his palms and for Kaminari to get a close combat weapon, since with the quirk he has anything metal would actually work wonders for him! He mentioned a sword, but I rest my case that tonfas would be cool, I really want him to use tonfas. A “costume” I don’t understand is Hagakure’s, by the way - would be nice if she got an actual costume and also I don’t really get why she’d wear gloves at all?? Mirio’s costume was made using his hair, I really want her to get something similar! That’s about it tho, I haven’t really thought much about anyone else in that sense~

Anon said:Hello! A few weeks ago I asked about the bracelets you drew for Baku & Kiri. (That art is so beautiful!!) I was wondering if there’s a story behind them; such as, did one of them buy the pair, or did they pick them out together? I’m sorry if it’s a dumb question and if I’m bothering you.

THIS ASK I had lost it, thank you so much for sending it my way again! Actually, Kirishima bought it for himself and Bakugou - I mean to draw a small thing for it, be patient with me while I try to get my ass into gear for it ;O;

Anon said:It’s been a while since you’ve done any BakuKiriKami, do you still like that ship?

I do - as I said a few answers above this one, I’m just finding myself weirdly invested in a platonic relationship between Bakugou and Kaminari at the moment, and also Bakushima stole my focus and soul, but I do still like the ship a whole damn lot, definitely still my fav ot3 in the manga~

Anon said:I love your drawings so much, they always make my day seeing them. But I gotta say that kiri with his hair down is my weakness. He just looks so pure, the cuteness factor goes through the roof.

Thank you???? The Kiri thing is true for canon Kiri too, I’m glad I can bring it in my art!!! Mostly cause when I draw him with his hair down I’m never really sure what the hell I’m doing, I’ll be honest with you lmao

Anon said:hello, holy fUCKin shit how are you this damn good at drawing? like, fuck? thank you, bless you, have a nice day

THANK YOU! And all I do is draw, really lmao I wouldn’t say I’m all that good, definitely not anywhere near the artists I admire, but since all I can do is draw as long as I keep doing that I guess I’ll get there, sooner or later hahaha

#fran answers #im gonna use the holidays as my excuse for how long it took me to answer all of these #....yeah #yeah im gonna do that #oc asks #anonymous

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curledlife · 7 years

Text

30 Questions Tag

I was tagged by @lets-make-bad-decisions-and-kpop thank you!!! and your url is too relatable!

1. Nicknames: J, Jay, Panda, Nugget (At this point, it’s whatever people call me but online I prefer J xD)

2. Gender: Fem

3. Star sign: Capricorn!

4. Height: 5′1/5′2 (I swear if the doctors don’t give me a straight answer, Imma just be like “hey, I’m 5′5″ knowing damn well I’m not xD)

5. time: 1:08 AM

6. Birthday: December 31st

7. Favorite bands: BTS, iKon, Winner, Of Mice & Men, BMTH, Astro, NCT, Mamamoo, 4 Minute, Secret, Vixx, Monsta X, Suicide Silence, Day6, Exo, Got7, BTOB, Pentagon, B.A.P, Three days grace, green day, Tokio Hotel, and more that I can’t think of at the moment

8. Favorite Solo Artists: Penomeco, Sleepy, Crush, Millic, Kehlani, SZA, Childish Gambino, Schoolboy Q, DEAN, Zico, Henry, Nell, ONE, Hoody, Swings, Mino, Nieah, Eddy Kim, Chance The Rapper, Samuel Seo, Bloo, Sik-k, and many more xD

9. Song stuck in my head: I actually don’t have a song stuck in my head rn but, the song that is playing is I Smile by Day6

10. Last Movie I watched: Thor: Ragnarok

11. Last Show I watched: Big Mouth....(so bad yet HILARIOUS)

12. When I did I create my blog? Somewhere in 2013 ok xD I use it way more now.

13. What do I post? Kpop, adorable stuff, meme’s but as you can tell, it’s mainly kpop even though I don’t commit my URL to that lmao

14. Last thing I googled: 10cm (I was curious to see if it was one guy or a band, turns out it basically is one guy since the other one left...)

15. Do I have any other blogs? Hell no, I can barely keep up with this one as it is.

16. Do I get asks? Sometimes!!! I love getting asks~! <3

17. Why I chose my URL? I have very curly life and I wanted something to represent my life as this is my blog...so curledlife :D

18. Following: 600 (I used to follow a lot but since I have had this blog for 4 years, most of them haven’t posted in years so I just unfollowed a bunch)

19. Followers: 1,232 (and I love my curls...that’s literally what I’m gonna call my followers now wow I’m corny as hell when it comes down to it)

20. Average hours of sleep: About 5 to 6 hours, I have never gotten a solid 8, it’s either I go over or under as hell

21. Lucky number: 10

22. Instruments: The flute

23. What am I wearing: Pokemon sweats and my senior t shirt

24. Dream job: Game Designer for Ubisoft, Bethesda, or anyone else

25. Dream trip: Japan, South Korea, Thailand, Hawaii, basically around the world

26. Favorite food: Anything with rice!

27. Nationality: American but to be specific Taiwanese/African American

28. Fave song: For right now it would have to be that one by Henry..his voice is just so smooth omfg he’s like a dean 1.5.....SERIOUSLY

29. Last book I read: Hmm the Red Queen by a person that I don’t remember at this moment xD

30. Top three fictional universes I’d like to join: Harry Potter, Marvel, and Shadowhunters (the actual book ok TV show is trash bye)

Tags: @lovepaintt @x072195x @jaebinn @chimless @minseokmelodrama @fatenumberfor4 @3rracha @nekojinmin @longguolatte (of course, you don’t have to do it!)

#tags #thank you for the tag!!!#havent done something this long in a long time tbh

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helenamayhathaway · 8 years

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im a junkie for mcr's old stuff (bullets to black parade). i like bmth, pierce, ghost town, and franks stuff from leathermouth. what bands would you recommend?

Sounds like you’re into post hardcore and metalcore which I can dig, personally my head is shoved up the ass of pop-punk but that genre is probably like top five on my list. (followed by a rating of how much I think you’ll like them out of 10)

Obviously if you’re into PTV I’m going to recommend you Sleeping With Sirens because like, that’s what you do when someone says they like PTV? You say “hey, you’re into pierce the veil, well how do you feel about a guy with an even MORE feminine voice?” (9/10)

I’ve recently gotten into Hawthorne Heights which are defo close to those bands (7/10)

Ice Nine Kills is probably my favorite metalcore or whatever you want to call them band, especially their album Every Trick in the Book where all the songs are based on books and just 👌👌👌👌👌 especially listen to the song me, myself and hyde which is like in my top ten favorite songs ever, it’s fucking GREAT. also they have a song called “the fastest way to a girl’s heart is through her ribcage” and i really respect that. My friend once bought drinks for these guys actually, she says they’re really nice dudes (and it doesn’t hurt that they make good music) (9/10)

Some people are into motionless in white? I’m not one of those people but like, to each his own? (5/10)

Bit of a throwback but Breaking Benjamin are pretty good. (6/10)

You Me At Six aren’t like super similar to the bands you mentioned but they’re an honorable mention, you can always check em out and decide you hate em. (5/10)

Of Mice & Men are an older favorite of mine, gotta love a bit of them in your life amiright (8/10)

Wouldn’t be a complete list if I didn’t list A Day To Remember. Great band, defo some pop-punk inspirations too, I mean just look at that one song where they complain about their hometown ahaha (9/10)

I’m really not into marilyn manson, i think he’s a bit of a jerk and I don’t really dig the music either but I mean there’s probably a reason they’re so famous? I just don’t see it. (6/10)

Crown the Empire. Kind of tame I guess but like I can dig em. (7/10)

Definitely check out the Used if you haven’t already they have a very similar sound to Bullets/Romance MCR (8/10)

FUCK Ronnie Radke and everything he’s ever been apart of so just like fucking forget about Escape the fate and falling in reverse. Far as I’m concerned Ronnie Radke doesn’t exist. (-1,000,000,000,000/10)

Taking Back Sunday? Also a bit of a throwback but I mean they’re definitely similar to the whole genre. (6/10)

I’ve not heard too many being as an ocean songs but I liked the ones I have heard so ya know, take a crack if you want to. (6/10)

Memphis May Fire, I’m not up in arms about them but I can dig a little if they’re playing, like I’m not gonna turn them off or anything (7/10)

We Came as Romans, forgot about them up until now, but I’m actually a pretty big fan, I would definitely recommend these guys!!! (7/10)

Avenged Sevenfold, don’t know how I forgot them up until now, either, but I did and I’m sorry. I would definitely definitely recommend them if you like BMTH or more like heavy guitars and anger ya feel. (9/10)

I mean it’d be off brand of me to not mention Young Guns at least once? I’m not gonna lie you might honestly like Young Guns given your taste so I’d definitely try out their first two albums Bones and All Our Kings Are Dead, and if you don’t like them don’t tell me to my face because they’re my babies and I’d kill a man for them. (1,000/10 but i’m biased)

Run out of bands that are coming to me like right now, but I mean that’s a pretty good list. Like as far as bands go, there’s like a spectrum which I’ll try to chart out for you because maybe you can figure out which genre you like best and then google more bands:

(these aren’t like definitive or anything but in general I’d say this is how the scale goes)

Pop-punk this is like the tame stuff which is usually about as catchy as pop but whiny AF and with musicians who actually write their own music, so this is like Fall Out Boy or All Time Low, or Danger Days era MCR

Hard rock Hard rock is basically like rock but with more intense guitars? Breaking Benjamin and Marilyn Manson would probably be here or metalcore, depends on who you ask. I’d probably put Revenge and black parade era MCR hereish.

Post-hardcore Post-hardcore really really ranges which is why I put it in the middle it’s like not always intense, but it’s usually more so intense than pop-punk? You Me At Six would probably go here and with pop-punk, so would like PTV and A Day To Remember. This is probably where Bullets era MCR would fall on the spectrum.Can be really screamy but can also be very not screamy, it varies a lot.

Metalcore This is where you’d put all the stuff that’s definitely not pop-punk but is still kind of whiny and has that warped tour vibe so PTV would probs be here and SWS might also be here but probably not, but again, it varies who you ask. I’d probably but A7x here though, and A Day To Remember is like not really metalcore but they’re close enough that you might say they are, it depends on how you define “screaming” though?

Screamo This is where oli sykes hangs out with his friends Hawthorne Heights and occasionally me when I’m having a bad day.

#Anonymous

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sinceileftyoublog · 5 years

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Live Picks: 8/1

Lone

BY JORDAN MAINZER

Non-Lollapalooza-shows > Lollapalooza aftershows > Lollapalooza.

Bryan Ferry, Chicago Theatre

The new Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee (via Roxy Music) brings his show to the Chicago Theatre tonight. He released a record just last year with his Orchestra, but expect tonight’s show to be mostly RM and older solo material, plus a few covers thrown in.

Death Cab for Cutie, Metro

When we saw Death Cab for Cutie at Riot Fest in 2016, they smartly played only a couple songs from their then most recent album. I don’t think you’ll be so lucky at Metro tonight or Lollapalooza tomorrow, considering they’re both still touring a year-old LP and have just announced an EP, having already shared a song from it. Still, the band always manages to sound great--even the songs that make you want to brush your teeth.

Local indie pop favorites Beach Bunny open.

Lone, Smartbar

Prolific IDM producer Matt Cutler, AKA Lone, has just released a three-track EP called Abraxas. It’s the first on his new imprint Ancient Astronauts, on which he’s releasing new material while working on his new record. This collection of songs are his first using a Roland TB-303, and appropriately, the results swarm with acid house beats. The most club-ready is the thumping jungle of a title track, replete with flourishes of flute trills. “Young Star Cluster” features zigzag percussion, a mixture of mallets and hand claps before giving way to softer textures of synthesizer zooms and washes. And “How Can You Tell” introduces an ascending chorus of voice and then a gloriously retro, almost jazz backing beat, the synths the cherry on top. “The universe is sending you a message from the past to the present and future,” says an ambiguous voice--what could better describe Lone’s approach to making music? Hopefully, he’ll play these tracks tonight at Smartbar.

DJs rRoxymore, Hijo Prodigo, & Zooey Glass open.

IDLES, Lincoln Hall

Righteous Britsol band IDLES have released two straight albums of dryly funny, yet socially conscious and unexpectedly moving shout-along punk. They play Lollapalooza tomorrow, but Lincoln Hall offers a more ideal place to see them, with its great sound, small space, and, uh, air conditioning. Expect a sweaty pit.

NYC noise rockers A Place to Bury Strangers open.

Bring Me The Horizon, House of Blues

Yet another band playing Lollapalooza tomorrow doing an after show tonight! When we previewed Bring Me The Horizon’s show earlier this year at the Aragon, we remarked that while their new album Amo is a mixed bag, “the highlights...combined with the strong elements from the band’s discography leaves the potential for a great set list and live show.” Looking at what they’ve been playing, they do include album opener “i apologise if you feel something” and better-than-it-deserves-to-be Grimes feature “Nihilist Blues”, but a lot of the other album tracks featured are the thematically immature breakup ones. Fortunately, the second and third most played albums in their set are 2015′s That’s the Spirit and 2013′s Sempiternal, which are further evidence that BMTH are not your average emo or metal band. They’ll certainly be better than whatever bro-core Lolla’s chalked up for tomorrow.

Electro-rock act Des Rocs opens.

The Strokes & Saba, Lollapalooza

Okay, I’ll include the Grant Park infestation itself. The Strokes, who have headlined the fest before, haven’t released any new music since 2016′s Future Present Past EP and haven’t dropped a record since 2013′s Comedown Machine. Their current global comeback tour has seen multiple cancelled festivals and sound issues, but hey, the debut of a new song! For the most part, though, they’ve been playing older material, focusing almost exclusively on their first three records.

The better bet to deliver a great set is local hip hop hero Saba, who stood out at last year’s Pitchfork and was responsible for our 3rd favorite album of last year.

Judah Friedlander, Hideout

For the majority of Judah Friedlander’s 2017 Netflix stand-up special America is the Greatest Country in the United States, he pretends he’s running for President and engages the audience on hot-button issues with the pretense of patriotism so absurd it constantly contradicts itself. The result is a set of clever, deadpan jokes, often one-liners and quick-thinking crowd-work, that brilliantly dissect the current political climate by, well, appearing a bit too close to it. It appears that two years later, Friedlander’s found a format that works on a night-by-night basis, allowing him to establish a base of responses to predictable audience answers while riffing on individual idiosyncrasies. His current tour, the Future President 2019 tour, purportedly has “new material.” Of course it does: The news gets more and more Kafkaesque every single day. Somebody’s gotta make us both get off our asses and laugh.

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peculiarlycruel · 6 years

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1. Would you have kiss with the last person you text messaged? yeap

2. You talked to an ex today, correct? nah

3. ever took someone’s virginity? yea, almost thrice

4. Is trust a big issue for you? naugh

5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently? yeap

6. What are you excited for? 2019!

7. What happened tonight? nothing

8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted? no

9. Is confidence cute? Hell yeah

10. What is the last beverage you had? tequilla

11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? none

12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans? yea

13. What are you gonna do Saturday night? nothing

14. What are you going to spend money on next? Jessie’s school supplies

15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed? ofcourse

16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months? Cant tell

17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? not

18. The last time you felt broken? December 2014

19.

20. Are you starting to realize anything? About life and other adult things

21. Are you in a good mood? meh

22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks? Whale sharks. Again. Probly.

23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s? yea black shit

24. What do you want right this second? Want to eat

25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy? if its matt healy, not okay. If its kurt cobain, still not ok. if its paolo ill kill him and beat his ass

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? Yes and its boring

27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh? If its matt and kurt, its ok.

28. What was the last thing that made you laugh? Cant remember

29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now? Guess yeap

30. Does everyone deserve a second chance? ofcourse

31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to? meh

32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do? I don’t know I guess. (baaaaaabe??)

33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda? not

34. Listening to? Mars argo

35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore? yea

36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is? Beside me

37. Do you believe in love at first sight? yeap

38. Who did you last called? mum

39. Who was the last person you danced with? Paolo carlo

40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? I just feel like it

41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake? yesterday

42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today? yeap

43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush? Always

44. Do you tan in the nude? Ofcourse naugh

45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss? Yea, for a change

46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? not

47. Who was the last person to call you? mum

48. Do you sing in the shower? sometimes

49. Do you dance in the car? sometimes

50. Ever used a bow and arrow? Not yet

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? graduation

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy? I don’t give a damn

53. Is Christmas stressful? Not.

54. Ever eat a pierogi? yea

55. Favorite type of fruit pie? cherry

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? Singer, but realoized

57. Do you believe in ghosts?

58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

59. Take a vitamin daily? dont

60. Wear slippers? Haha

61. Wear a bath robe? not

62. What do you wear to bed? anywho

63. First concert? pulp

64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? sm

65. Nike or Adidas? nikkii

66. Cheetos Or Fritos? Cheetos my lurv

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? Hmmmm sunflower!!

68. Favorite Taylor Swift song? Back to december

69. Ever take dance lessons? Runs in the blood. KiDding

70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? Engineer baby

71. Can you curl your tongue? yea

72. Ever won a spelling bee? parang!

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? not

74. What is your favorite book? Catcher in the rye

75. Do you study better with or without music? With!!

76. Regularly burn incense? What no

77. Ever been in love? yez

78. Who would you like to see in concert? Atl bmth etf 1975 nirvana oh I wish fftl the summer set

79. What was the last concert you saw? pulp

80. Hot tea or cold tea? hot

81. Tea or coffee? This is very hard

82. Favorite type of cookie? Chocolate chip

83. Can you swim well? yeap

84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? yeap

85. Are you patient? Not really

86. DJ or band, at a wedding? Band ofcourse

87. Ever won a contest? yeap

88. Ever have plastic surgery? no

89. Which are better black or green olives? Black, for the sake of the color

90. Opinions on sex before marriage? haha

91.

92. Do you want to get married? This is very hard

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nostalgiaispeace · 7 years

Text

544.

if you could have sex with any celebrity right now, who would it be? Lana Del Rey if you had to have sex with one of your best friends who would it be? none. ever fallen in love with a friend? no. did you end up getting together or not? -

if yes, how did you end up together? if no, why not? -

have you ever been the other woman? no we all have that one song that gets us pumped, what’s yours? anything poppy by Lana have you ever been to prom? did you have a good time? nope. don’t you just hate it when someone is a boring texter? no. i’m a pretty boring texter now a days

ever let someone use you knowing they were using you? no how many people have you slept with (sexually not actually sleeping)? 1 how many of them were you actually in love with? 1

ever taken someone’s virginity? no would you ever want to be with a virgin? if no, why not? no favorite song lyrics? hospital for souls - bmth do you constantly find yourself internet stalking your ex? No. if yes, how many times a day on average do you find yourself doing this? - so like, what’s your zodiac sign? sure what’s your favorite item of clothing you have & why? my grandpa’s pj bands and flannels; because he passed and they were his. do you have anything to hide? yes. are you friends with any of your exes? yes given the chance would you take any of your exes back? no do you have an addiction? to what? yes; - do you like being taken or single more & why? taken; because i’m getting married so...common sense would tell you... being loud & obnoxious is fun huh? no do you feel like you’re sorta split personality? half & half? no. do you act like your own gender or more like the opposite sex? um what? i act like myself? didn’t know a gender had a personallity do you have more friends of the same sex or opposite? opposite. blunts, bowls or bongs? none favorite sexual position? bottom. 3 traits your dream partner would have? matthew charles aselin do you really care what people think of you? yes when you have a fight with your partner what do you do? cry holiday closest to your birthday? christmas scenario time.. you have a wedgie in public, you… fill in the blank. fix it who does the grocery shopping in your house? me

are your parents still together? if no, do you wish they were? no; no have any siblings you know of but don’t actually know personally? yes greatest fear? losing my mom something most people fear that you do not fear at all? bugs don’t you hate getting nice & comfy & then having to pee? yes what do you think of porn & the people who watch it? i like porn fine and don’t care if people watch it when your friends mention you in fb statuses & tweets do you get happy? sure how much does it really take to get you mad? not a lot now a days would you date someone that your parents & friends didn’t approve of? i did for a bit but now my moms chill. i dont care what my friends think. i’ve learned they really can’t know a person they aren’t around. do you have any regrets? Yes. are you always the one to apologize even if it’s not your fault? no ever lost friends because of a certain guy or girl? kinda ever used a legit sex toy before? yes ever questioned your sexuality? no ever thought you were pregnant? Yep. ever faked being pregnant? No. favorite song at the moment? 13 beaches - lana

ever had a major surgery performed on you? dunno if it’s major but i had surgery on my eyes do you actually like school lunches? - do you think you’re a boring person? yeah do you think you’re more or less a good person? no which of the 7 deadly sins are you guilty of? all of them probably ever made a survey & then taken it yourself? no do you think it’s possible to dislike all music? no what’s one thing you think everyone has in common? selfishness do you believe that there’s actually good in EVERYONE? sure what’s one thing that bothers you that probably wouldn’t bother most people? not sure do you believe in forever? yes how many relationships have you been in? one do you ever want to get married? why or why not? yes; because i am do you believe in divorce? i mean it’s not fake lol is there a song you can’t listen to without thinking of someone? no do you think a lot of the surveys on here are too alike? yeah

how are you feeling right now? tired do you like being called babe, baby, hunnie, etc? yeah have you ever thought etc was actually ect? no? do you have any sort of ongoing health problem? Yes. ever lost someone close to you? Yep. ever been hit by a motor vehicle? yes can you play a musical instrument? no do you wish you did? Yes.

are you able to speak fluently in more than one language? No. ever self harmed in any way? - do you prefer longer or shorter surveys? doesn’t matter what is one word you just cannot pronounce? - if you could look like any celebrity who would you look like? Lana del rey ever wish you were of the opposite sex? no don’t you just love fun people? yeah is there that one person who you just CAN NOT seem to get over? No. so what’s your dream job? singer someone you can’t see yourself being able to live without? my mom best & most favorite video game (pc or console) ever? the last of us would you ever tattoo someone’s name on you? yes (an autograph tho) when people sing happy birthday to you do you feel awkward or happy? happy favorite thing about being in a relationship? it’s nice favorite thing about being single? it’s nice ever been hurt by someone you thought would never hurt you? yeah don’t you hate it when people in relationships act single? yesssssssssss so is your hair dyed? yeah sex is really good isn’t it? duh ever had a friends with benefits? no do you like trains :)? ....no do you think you have a pretty good singing voice? obviously how about dancing, are you a good dancer? LOL no is intelligence a turn on for you? Yes. do you like to feel powerful & in charge? yesh capricorns are the best aren’t they? sure we are are you afraid to stand out? no

#me #survey

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coldkingdomzac-blog · 7 years

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A Slow Drain

It’s been a while since the last time I’ve posted to this blog. There is an explanation as to why I have not posted…and I wish there was a better one…but there isn’t. Nevertheless, the reason I haven’t posted is one that may seem a little taboo to talk about, and to be honest, feels a little draining to think about the reality of it all. However, I’ll try to be somewhat poignant in my explanation and do my best to keep it from sounding like a sob story or me complaining about things that are seemingly out of my control. So, here goes:

When we were on the road with Shinedown and As Lions, the boys in As Lions went to a show in Los Angeles. It was a show I was most definitely interested in attending, but I was more interested in seeing my family arrive after a long couple of weeks without seeing them. The show included one of my favorite sing-along hardcore groups; Underoath. I didn’t really know much else about the show other than the fact Bring Me The Horizon and Beartooth were also playing. I’m a casual BMTH fan, but knew nothing about Beartooth.

With my family coming into town, I wanted to make sure that I was dedicating all of my time to their arrival, thus, I did not attend the show. The next day at one of our shows, Dave (drummer for As Lions) and I talked about the show. He informed me how bummed he was to have missed the entire Beartooth set. I had grown an avid respect for Dave by this point and trusted his taste in music. I didn’t give it much thought until we ended the tour and I found myself with very little to do other than write and avoid being bored in a Las Vegas hotel. So, I started scouring for new music and things to research in terms of moving forward with the band. Beartooth seemed like an acceptable place to start.

Upon first listen, I enjoyed what I heard, but wasn’t sure if it was going to be something that I fully gravitated towards. While listening to the music, I do as I usually do with new bands that I know nothing about, and I started researching who they were and where they came from.

All the while, I was sitting in this Las Vegas hotel dreading the fact that I was stuck so far away from home with absolutely no money and very little else to do. It didn’t help that the tour had ended and I really had nothing more on my radar to look forward to in terms of the band. I began feeling drained and exhausted. My mind started wandering at what the potential next steps with the band were and also what I was going to do when I got home regarding personal finances. I left my job in December in hopes of focusing solely on working towards a career in music. I have to say, it’s 100% the opposite of a lucrative endeavor and has been tough to make any ends meet. Thinking about finances alone can be something that sends me into a complete tailspin of depression.

I sat in the air conditioned hotel room researching this band and trying to avoid the overall panic attack that was beginning to set in. Reading the lyrics as well as the back history of the band really started to open my eyes and shed a lot of light on some things that I’ve been dealing with over the past few years.

My wife and I have always described my personality as “moody”. There are times when I can be a peach and be having the best week of my life. Within moments, I can flip the script and be the most depressed mother fucker you’ve ever met in your life. I shut down. My typically open door of communication is non-existent and I want nothing to do with reality or anything social. I hate people and wear my emotion on my sleeve for all to see. Not even my wife or kids are safe from the pure devastation my “mood swings” would produce. Sarah (my wife for those of you who don’t know her by name), would always refer to these moods as me being “in it” and would do her best to allow me to work through them.

Placing a finger on why my mood would violently alter was never something I’ve been able to do. Just this last week, Sarah and I started to discuss the possible futures of playing in a band. While some of the outcomes were positive, a lot of the outcomes were on the opposite end of the spectrum. I started to realize that all of the hard work that I’ve been putting into making this band work could (possibly) crash to the ground and I’d be left at square one all over again. Knowing myself and how I’m wired, I know I’d eventually find a way to pick myself back up and start over again in a completely new way, but the fear and anxiety of that failure weighed heavily on me, especially with the financial burden I have placed over my family’s head to pursue this dream.

I could feel my chest begin to tighten and my breathing took on a new pattern. I couldn’t breathe as easily and felt my stomach start to churn. I felt a panic attack coming on and there wasn’t any way I could curb it other than to grab a guitar from my studio and hope to “creatively” write the feeling away. Having a guitar in my hand only assisted in pushing my fears of “failing” with music deeper and deeper. My emotions were running wild and all I wanted to do was curl up and cry.

It’s a difficult thing to be in a band that is trying to do things 100% DIY. Working so hard to get someone in the music industry to notice you and what you’re doing only to receive an onslaught of “NO”’s in working with you is, for lack of a better term, daunting. It’s exhausting working the business side of the band and receiving so many rejections. Even the proudest of people would struggle with it. When you come off of such an amazing experience of touring with a national band, but watching both bands continue on their touring journey’s and you’re at home scraping the bottom of the barrel to find a way to provide for your family…the uncertainty of being in a band starts to take its toll on you and you start to feel a bit discouraged. Mix that in with the overwhelming fear of failure, and it’s not a healthy drink to try to swallow.

I did my best to try and ignore the feelings that were sitting deep in the pit of my stomach. It clearly wasn’t working. I spent the entire day on Wednesday locked in my studio trying to create something simply for the sake of creating. I needed to know that outside of what I was doing with my band, I could create something that was wanted by someone else. I set out to write and record a song with the full intention that it was not going to be something I was going to use for Cold Kingdom. Maybe it was just me trying to convince myself that there is something out there for me whether it be Cold Kingdom or something different…I don’t know. It was an expectation I set for myself and one I achieved within the day.

I finished the song and felt proud of my accomplishment. It was something I hadn’t done before: write a song strictly for myself and no one else. I wanted to share it with other people and see if it was something I could get someone else excited about. I needed the reassurance that my creation held some sort of meaning outside of being proud of it for myself. Perhaps it was just the people I sent it to, but the minimal feedback I received on the song didn’t really reassure me that my future outside of CK was really cemented in optimism.

You’ll never hear me fishing for compliments. Hell, if you don’t like my music; cool. I do what I do because I love it. However, on this particular day, while dealing with these overwhelming feelings of despair, I needed someone to tell me that what I just created mattered. I needed something other than criticism and artistic critique. Any other day, I would have been fine not receiving it. This particular day was otherwise.

Thursday came around and I spent the day working on a job site trying to wash away the impending sadness that had washed over me with filling up the day with manual labor. While it somewhat worked, I could still feel myself slipping deeper and deeper into this depressive state. It was taking me over and there was nothing I could do to stop it or even bottle it up and hide it away. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t talk to anyone about it. I was stuck simply dealing with this shit.

It was now Friday and I had to hole up in a van and drive 5 ½ hours away to a show in Racine, WI. I knew I wasn’t upset with anyone in the band, but I also knew that I didn’t want to be around anyone, let alone stuck in a box on wheels to play a show hours away from home. I was miserable and stuck inside my own head. As Sarah had said in the past; I was “in it”…..DEEP.

My poor band members. While I did my best to not take out all of these feelings on them, they still had to ride in a van with me as I sulked in my own misery. The night before, I had started to listen to a new group called, “Nothing, Nowhere.”. There’s not much for information when researching this group, but there was something about the vibe of the music and the words/emotion he was spilling into each song that really kept me listening. Every song is melancholy and sad. It was probably not something I needed in that moment, but somehow still was. I listened to the songs on repeat pretty much the entire trip out to Racine. I was sinking deeper and deeper.

The “funny” thing about both bands that I’ve listed in the blog post, is that both lead singers seem to deal with the same shit I’d been dealing with throughout the week, but have never been able to pinpoint until relating to their music: anxiety.

I allow myself to get overwhelmed by everything in my life I’m working on or dealing with. I feel as though I’m a strong individual and can handle all of these things at one time all while dealing with someone else’s problems at the same time. I’m a problem solver and I pride myself on being so. It’s the “problems” I don’t have complete control over that start to take over my mind thought and the process of working towards their resolution. I think of the possible, yet sometimes non-probable, outcomes and let the fear of the unknown take over. The anxiety of these issues causes panic attacks and I have trouble breathing, sleeping or even functioning on a normal level. There’s a possibility this has caused a lot of my boredom and frustrations when I’m in a job and feel stuck, needing to find something different to “challenge” me.

There aren’t too many words that can truly describe this feeling unless you yourself have experienced in one capacity or another.

I don’t write about this because I’m looking for sympathy. I write this because it’s helping me find some clarity in how to deal with said issue. I mentioned earlier that this subject may be a little taboo for some to talk about. Believe me, it’s something that’s hard for me to want to put a term on either…but it’s real. Anxiety is real and a complete bitch. I’m still struggling with the decision of whether I sit down and talk to a professional about this or not. My pride keeps me from sitting and discussing problems that I am already well aware of and am trying to get a grasp on with fighting them from my own mental state. My fears keep me from talking to them on the instance that these professionals recommend I medicate this issue to assist with the panic attacks. What if it curbs my creativity? What if it completely fucks up my drive to want something so much more out of this music endeavor? That takes away a good part of the chemical material that makes Zac Boyd; Zac Boyd. That scares the shit out of me too. Enter yet another equation into the endless cycle of anxiety and the fears it brings to light.

There is help. I’m glad I’m starting to recognize what this could possibly be. Now, it’s just a matter of sucking up my pride and sitting down with someone who could possibly help me better than myself. I will continue to push for what I want from this music industry. I will continue to push for the success of Cold Kingdom. I will always push myself to be creative and explore new avenues with my drive towards the business aspect of it. Having music to be able to relate to has helped me open my eyes to what I’ve dealt with for years, and I couldn’t be more appreciative of that. There is help out there. I’ll find it. Perhaps to the very few reading this blog that find themselves around me, this will help somewhat explain why I am the way I am sometimes. It’s not just me being an asshole ;)

Enjoy some of the music that has helped get me through some shit times this week:

youtube

#beartooth #nothingnowhere #coldkingdomband #shinedown #aslionsband #anxiety #thereishelp

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overlyobsessedfreak · 8 years

Text

150 Questions

I Did A Question Thingy 4 Years Ago. I Want To See How Much Ive Changed.

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? 4 Years: My Momma Now: This Stupid Guy.

2. Are you outgoing or shy? 4y: Shy Now: Shy

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? 4y: KAMERON AND ANDY SIXX <<< Nice To See My Priorities included A Band Member. Now: Kyler, Chris And My Family Back Home.

4. Are you easy to get along with? 4y: Sometimes Now: Sometimes

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? 4y: Yesh Now: I Know He Would.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? 4y: Nice,Shy people Now: Dorky And Nice People.

7. Do you think you'll be in a relationship two months from now? 4y: I hope so 1 year so far <<< Back When I Had Low Self Esteem And Thought I Needed A S/O When I Didnt Love Them. I Let That Go On For Way Too Long. Now: Absolutely.

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? 4y: My Boyfriend Now: Boyfriend And My Best Friend.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? 4Y: Depends On who Im talking to. Now: Nah.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? 4Y: Kameron Now: Either My Cousin Mariah Or Deanna.

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? 4Y: Nothin Now: There Is A Difference xD

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? 4Y: In the End-BVB, If Im James Dean then your Audrey Hepburn acoustic Version-SWS, King For a day-PTV, Hell On heels-BOTDF, Finders Keepers- YMAS, Ohio Is on Fire- OM&M Now: Follow You By BMTH, Scars By I Prevail, Heroin By SWS, Stuck In Your Head By I Prevail, Four Is Enough.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? 4y: Yes Now: Yes

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? 4y: Nope Now: Nope.

15. What good thing happened this summer? 4y: Ocean City Now: Nothing I Can Recall

16. If you could kiss anyone who would it be? 4y: Kameron and Andy Sixx << Again With The Band Thing Now: Kyler.

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? 4y: YES Now: Yep.

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? 4y: yesh he's in one of my classes. Now: Nope.

19. Do you like bubble baths? 4y: Yesh. Now: Yep

20. Do you like your neighbors? 4Y: NOPE. Now: Dont Know Them.

21. What are you bad habits? 4Y: Talking in sleep, biting lower lip, Inside cheek, Biting My nails, Biting off lip skin Now: All Still Happening

22. Where would you like to travel? 4y:France Now: Ohio.

23. Do you have trust issues? 4y: Yes Now: Yep

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? 4Y: Computer or Seeing my bf. Now: Pretty Much The Same But Now Im Adding Talking To My Friends On Skype For Hours Upon Hours.

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? 4y: Everything Now: My Smile.

26. What do you do when you wake up? 4y: I go downstairs and Eat cereal Now: Do Chores And Then Message People Back.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? 4y: Lighter <<< My Ass Wanting To Be A Vampire And Shit. Now: Dont Care.

28. Who are you most comfortable around? 4y: Friends and Close Family Now: Kyler, Chris, A Select Few Of My Friends And Family.

29. Have any of your ex's told you they regret breaking up? 4y: Nope. Now: Yep.

30. Do you ever want to get married? 4Y: Yes Now: I Believe So.

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? 4y: A very small one. Now: Yep.

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? 4Y: Avril Lavigne and Andy Sixx, Sasuke and Naruto, Gaara and Ino, Andy Sixx and Ashley Purdy, Vic Fuentes And Kellin Quinn, Alice And Mad Hatter, Finn and Princess Bublegum, Finn and Marceline, Princess bubblegum and Marceline, Zuko and Katara, Sam Manson and Danny Phantom, Gaara and Naruto, Cat and Tori, Jade and Tori, Tori and Beck, Abby and Tony, Tony and Ziva, Noami and Emily, Jamie and Vic ^^^ WHAT THE FUCK?!?!? I WAS 13?!?!? My Hypersexualized Ass? Wtf. Now: No.

33. Spell your name with your chin. 4y: a7tumknjm Now: autguumnj

34. Do you play sports? 4y: What sports? HAHAHHAHA Your Funny Now: No. Though I Enjoy Soccer If I Get A Chance.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? 4Y: TV Now: No.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? 4y: Yeah Now: Obviously

37. What do you say during awkward silences? 4y: "So....." Now: I Just Continue Being Silent.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? 4y: My boyfriend <3 <<< Autumn Should’ve Stopped Lying To Herself. Now: My Boyfriend Now Honestly, He Treats Me Perfectly And I Dont Ever Want Anyone Else.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? 4y: Hot Topic, Rue 21, etc. Now: Same I Think. Though I Cant Afford That Shit.

40. What do you want to do after high school? 4y: Video Game Designer or something with animals. Now: HAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHH

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? 4y: Yes Now: No.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? 4y: I'm thinking. Now: Either Im Thinking Or Im Having Really Bad Anxiety.

43. Do you smile at strangers? 4y: Yeah. Now: Yes. Everyone Deserves A Smile. 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? 4y: Bottom of ocean. Now: If It Was 100% Safe? Either. Both Sound Awesome.

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? 4y: My grandfather. Now: My Fear Of Being A Failure.

46. What are you paranoid about? 4y: Too much stuff Now: Right Now Im At Peace.

47. Have you ever been high? 4y: Yeah Now: Yep :/ God I Hate My Parents. 48. Have you ever been drunk? 4y: Yeah Now: Yeah, I Hate My Parents.

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? 4y: Yes. Now: Yep.

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? 4y: Gray and Black Now: Grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else? 4y: Yes Now: Absolutely.

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? 4y: Everything Now: My Motivation, My Ability To Do Simple Tasks.

53. Favourite makeup brand? 4y: Hard Candy Now: Uhhhh

54. Favourite store? 3y: Hot Topic Now: Dont Have One.

55. Favourite blog? 4y: http://justpiercetheveilalready.tumblr.com/ and http://andley.tumblr.com/ Now: I Cant Choose :(

56. Favourite colour? 4y: Purple and Red Now: Purple And Red

57. Favourite food? 4y: Spaghetti and Chili Now: Spaghetti, Chili, Steak, Honey Chipotle Chicken.

58. Last thing you ate? 4y: Raspberry lemonade Now: Beeferoni.

59. First thing you ate this morning? 4y: Cereal Now: Beeferoni

60. Ever won a competition? 4y:For what? Nope. Now: I Was Student Of The Month Once.

61. Been suspended/expelled? 4y: Nope but I got MIP twice, Once for stealing and the other cuz I wrote bad storys Now: Ive Had In School Suspension At Least 100 Times. Whoops.

62. Been arrested? 4y: Nope. Now: No

63. Ever been in love? 4y: I am right now.<<< Again With The Lying Autumn Now: Yes, And I Can Say That Honestly Without A Single Doubt Now. I Have Never Felt This Deeply For Anyone.

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? 4y: Never had one. Now: Oh Lord. It Was With My Friend Ely And We Were Listening To Sleeping With Sirens And Sitting On My Bed. He Put His Hand Over Mine And Asked If I Was Nervous, I Said Yes And We Kissed.

65. Are you hungry right now? 4y: Yes. Now: Sort Of.

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? 4y: What tumblr friends. Now: Again No Tumblr Friends.

67. Facebook or Twitter 4y: Facebook Now: Facebook 68. Twitter or Tumblr? 4y: Tumblr Now: Tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? 4y: yes Now: Yep

70. Names of your bestfriends? 4y: Mariah, Kameron, Kati, Josh, Lexi, Lauren, Kevin Now: Kyler, Chris, Mariah, Talula, Deanna, Tristan, Kim

71. Craving something? 4y: What? Boyfriend. Now: To Cuddle My Boyfriend 72. What colour are your towels? 4y: anything. Now: Anything

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 4y: 3 Or 4 Now: 4

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? 4y: No Now: No. 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? 4y: Idkkkk Now: 3 With Me, The Rest Are In A Box Somewhere.

75. Favourite animal? 4y: Cats and Dogs. Now: Cats, Dogs, Wolves, Foxes, All Pretty Similar.

76. What colour is your underwear? 4y: Purple. << Glad To Know I Let Everyone Know What Color My Underwear Was At 13... Now: None Of Your Business.

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? 4y: Vanilla Now: Either? They Are All Great,

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? 4y: Vanilla or Green Mint Now: Green Mint Chocolate Chip, Vanilla Swirl, Chocolate Or Vanilla.

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? 4y: Black Now: Grey And Black Stripped.

80. What colour pants? 4y: Black Now: Blue With Snoopy And Woodstock On Them

81. Favourite tv show? 4y: Anime, Lost Girl, Animals, Crime shows Now: Eyewitness, Shadowhunters, Teen Wolf, The Flash, Pretty Little Liars, A Bunch Of Them Really.

82. Favourite movie? 4y: Breaking Dawn part 2 and Matilda Now: Matilda, Moana, Miss Peregrine's home for peculiar children,

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? 4y: Mean girls. Now: Mean Girls

84. Breaking dawn part 1 or part 2? 4y: Part 2 Now: Part 2 I Guess?

85. Favourite character from Breaking dawn part 2? 4y: Alice and Jasper Now: Still Alice And Jasper.

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? 4y: Squirt Now: Dory.

87. First person you talked to today? 4y:Mariah Now: Kyler

88. Last person you talked to today? 4y: Mariah Now: Kyler

89. Name a person you hate? 4y: Everyone except friends and Close family Now: I Only Hate One Person And His Name Is Jacob.

90. Name a person you love? 4y: Kameron Now: To Save Me From Writing A Long Ass List Im Just Gonna Go With The Romantic Love Which Is Kyler.

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? 4y: YES. Now: Mostly Myself But Yes.

92. In a fight with someone? 4y: Nope, I dont think so. Now: Nope

93. How many sweatpants do you have? 4y: I dunno Now: A Hell Of A Lot.

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 4y: 3 or 4 Now: 2 :(

95. Last movie you watched? 4y: Breaking dawn part 2 Now: Moana

96. Favourite actress? 4y: Pauley Perrette Now: Idk

97. Favourite actor? 4y: Matthew Gray Gubler Now: Idk

98. Do you tan a lot? 4y: No Now: I Tan Easily?

99. Have any pets? 4y: 2 one dog one cat. Now: A Dog

100. How are you feeling? 4y: I dunno Now: As Of Right Now, Nothing.

101. Do you type fast? 4y: Yes. Now: Yep

102. Do you regret anything from your past? 4y: Who doesn't? Now: Again Who Doesnt.

103. Can you spell well? 4y: Yeah?? Now: Mostly.

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? 4y: Of course. Now: Yes.

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? 4y: Yes. Now: Yes.

106. Ever Broken someone's heart? 4y: I dunno Now: Yep...

107. Have you ever been on a horse? 4y:YES. Now: Yep

108. What should you be doing? 4y: Writing my storys or Writing My boyfriends letter. Now; Probably Sleeping.

109. Is something irritating you right now? 4y: No Now: Teen Wolf Season 5 Episode 9 Scott Doesnt Know How Donovan Really Died And Stiles Looks So Sad. SCOTT YOU STUPID PIECE OF TRASH BITE THAT POOR GIRL.

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? 4y: Yeah Now: Yeppp

111. Do you have trust issues? 4y: Yeah Now: Yep

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? 4y: Momma Now: My Uncle

113. What was your childhood nickname? 4y Now: Autie and Tootie

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? 4y: Yes Now: Yep.

115. Do you play the Wii? 4y: Not anymore Now: Nope

116. Are you listening to music right now? 4y: No. Now: No.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? 4y: NO. << Caps? Why You Gotta Be So Loud About It? Now: Yes

118. Do you like Chinese food? 4y: Nope. Now: No

119. Favourite book? 4y: The Immortals Series Now: House Of Night Series.

120. Are you afraid of the dark? 4y: Depends on where Im at. Now: Depends On Where I Am.

121. Are you mean? 4y: I can be. Now: Can Be.

122. Is cheating ever okay? 4y: Are you serious? NO. DENIED. DO NOT DO IT. Now: No.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? 4y: LOL no Now: No.

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? 4y: Yesh. Now: Yeah

125. Do you believe in true love? 4y: Yeah. Now: Yes.

126. Are you currently bored? 4y: Yes Now: Yep.

127. What makes you happy? 4y: Bf and Friends Now: Same.

128. Would you change your name? 4y: Yesh. Now: Nah.

129. What your zodiac sign? 4y: Scorpio

130. Do you like subway? 4y: No. Now: No.

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 4y: Id be cool Cause hes my BF. Now: Same, But If It Wasnt My Bf Id Probably Set The Record Straight.

132. Who's the last person you had a deep conversation with? 4y:Mariah Now: Mariah And Or Deanna.

133. Favourite lyrics right now? 4y: "With every sin I still Wanna Be holy." Now: “Heroine My Sweetest Sin I Cant Seem To Get Enough, Pull Me Under Wake Me Up Feel The Rush. Morphine Lover Make Me Numb, Make It So I Can't Get Up. Paper Thin Till You Sink In, Could You Be My Heroine?”

134. Can you count to one million? 4y: I guess if I wanted to. Now: Same

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? 4y: "I said I was an 87 year old." Now: Probably That One. Idk.

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? 4y: Closed Now: Closed.

137. How tall are you? 4y: 5'2 Now: 5′3

138. Curly or Straight hair? 4y: Mine is Curly but I want straight. Now: Both.

139. Brunette or Blonde? 4y: Brunette Now: Brunette

140. Summer or Winter? 4y: Summer Now: Winter.

141. Night or Day? 4y: Night Now: Night.

142. Favourite month? 4y: July. Now: October

143. Are you a vegetarian? 4y: Nope Now: Nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? 4y: Dark. Now: Milk.

145. Tea or Coffee? 4y: Tea Now: Tea.

146. Was today a good day? 4y: Yeah. Now: Yes

147. Mars or Snickers? 4y: Snickers Now:

148. What's your favourite quote? 4y: “Each and every one of us has a fire that burns inside us and they can try like hell to put out that flame but as long as in our minds we know who we are meant to be, they don’t stand a chance.” -Andy Sixx Now: Uhhhh

149. Do you believe in ghosts? 4y: Yeah. Now: Yes. 150. Get the closet book next to you, open it to page 42, what's the first line on that page? 4y: Found Out that Loren was really with Neferet and he didnt care about me at all, even though we'd imprinted. Now: No Books :(

#Answered Questions #my post

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