#honestly everything has been fine except for my fucking MATHS TEACHER

[sleep-nurse]

this school sucks ass holy shit

[fakeloveaskblog]

Hi Logan, how do I even start? Save this number, if you want to. I have been supporting Remy through texts for a bit. They have revealed to me some very troubling things in the past. Things like, their boyfriend kicking their cane from under them as a ‘joke’? Those kinds of things.

Virgil, that's his name by the way, also kind of yells at them a lot at times, and tells them they're worthless except for the use he can give to their body and that nobody else will ever love them. They believe they are horrible. They believe they deserve it. They appear to think their disability makes them only a burden to him and nothing else and while I have tried to convince them to the contrary I honestly don't believe I can when they're still trapped by choice in such a toxic environment.

I have tried to help and give them the tools to better their self-esteem and combat that, and send them nice text messages in general, but that hasn't helped in anything more than a superficial level. If you can do something, anything, or could take their case to someone who can something, I'd really appreciate that.

(Words: 2088)

(Talk of U!Virgil)

Logan: "That is...That is" He took a moment to gather himself "That is even worse than I had estimated"

"This must have been happening the other times we met them too right? And we didn't notice anything. We should have- we-" Patty mumbled out. Her voice was shaky.

She had just gotten home half an hour ago or so, she wasn't even fully out of her cosplay makeup. Logan had immediately pulled her into a hug which wasn't uncommon but he'd held onto her so hard it hurt and he’d been close to collapsing into the hug.

All it took was her asking if he was alright for him to tell her everything. He couldn't keep a secret from her even if he tried.

Now they sat in the couch. Logan had his head leaned on her chest and she had moved her arms around his waist. All they'd eaten was some of the leftover pie from Lo's date a few days ago because both of them were far too worked up to even think about cooking.

Patty pinched the bridge of her nose and tried to think "Okay well if they're being emotionally abused as what we know suggest then...I..is there even anyone we can contact that could help. I mean there's no- there's no evidence right? Or well- it's just- it's their word against Virgil's and if they won't even say Virgil is abusing them then there's nothing!"

"We can kidnap them" Logan pointed out.

"That we can"

Logan sighed “Do you think talking to them would even make a difference? They seem to already hate me so now it’s even less likely that they’ll listen”

“Well honey you can always try. They go to the same therapist as Janus right? So you can just casually ‘run into them’ right?” She gave him a loving kiss “I know my lil smarty-sweetheart can help them”

He sent her a tired smile “I’ll try”

--

Remy wasn’t as upset from the therapy session as they usually were. It had mostly been discussing how they felt about maybe being poly. They still thought they deserved a smoke break afterwards though so now they sat on bench right outside the entrance, they were on their third cigarette.

They had their head leaned against the back of the bench and was looking up at the greying sky and falling leaves so they didn’t notice when Logan sat down. He kept his distance to not startle them but cleared his throat to get their attention.

“Are you also waiting for someone?” He asked.

They glanced over to him “Girl go fuck yourself with a rake”

“Noted. I will put it in my calender. I for one am here to pick up Janus after his therapy is over for the day. Mayhaps I will show him some more star trek”

“Okay great gal. Then I’m just like waiting for Remus I guess” They pressed the cigarette into their leather jacket to put it out so they could leave as soon as they saw their cru- friend.

Logan inched closer “Is your bruise healing well?”

“Just ‘cause we’re in the same place doesn’t mean we have to talk to each other!” They snapped back.

“Exscuse me, I was simply worried about your physical health”

They rolled their eyes and crossed their arms before mumbling out “It’s fine. It’s whatever. I haven’t done it again so like forget it” 

“I am relieved to hear that”

Silence fell over them. Remy refused to look at him. Logan tried to figure out what was the best way to ask them about Virgil.

“....Your boyfriend did not insult you once you came home right?” He asked them in such a soft tone as if any slight wrong saying would make them implode on themself.

“Girl there you go again with your stupid fucking bullshit. I don’t wanna like talk about it!....Not ‘cause anything happened but ‘cause I hate you! You don’t- we don’t- we’re not friends! Why are you just like forcing yourself in on my private life! It’s like- it’s like fucking stalking!”

Logan reached out his hand to comfort them but quickly stopped himself “I am sorry. I don’t know how to best formulate this but I sincerely don’t mean to upset you like, neither do I know how to not upset you. All I know is that I want you to be okay and that if my partner treated me like yours seem to do I wouldn’t be able to stay”

Remy’s hair fell in front of their face as they leant their head in their plams “You don’t get it” They muttered.

“I am sure I don-”

“IT’S NOT THAT FUCKING EASY! It’s not like I have any savings an-and I’m not able to keep a job and without Virgil I have no way to buy medicine and- Like do you just want me to walk out and become homeless and like starve to death? Is that it? Like even if I wanted to leave, which I don’t, It’s not like I have a choice!”

A quiet sniffle came from them. Logan gave them a moment to gather their breathe.

“I...I didn’t mean to make it sound like leaving was easy” Logan murmured “I understand that you have probably been forced to think like you have no choice but to stay. I am aware of how crippling manipulation like that can be” 

He leaned closer and even though they didn’t look at him he still sent them his most caring look as he continued.

“But I promise you that there are other options. You aren’t stuck. I am willing to let you stay at my apartment for however long you need and if you aren’t comfortable with that I am sure Janus or Remus would let you stay as well. I can even pay for a motel if that would be better. Depending on what part of your disability is making you unable to work I am sure that could be fixed. For example a wheelchair could help! My point is that you do have a choice, even if it’s very understandably hard to think that”

Remy’s shoulders were shaking. Logan gently placed his hand on top of their bony shoulder. Every vein was visible through their light skin.

At just the hint of his touch they flinched away. They stumbled up from the bench and took a few steps away. They looked at him with reddened eyes.

“No. No. Girl you- you just don’t get it! That’s all!” They spat out, their voice was shaky as well “You haven’t like lived with me. Once you or Remus o-or anyone spends enough time with me you’ll realize what an annoying overemotional burden I am! An-and then I’ll get thrown out! Okay!? So-so it’s not really- I don’t actually have a choice ‘cause I’ll just get thrown out. Virgil is the only who will ever bother to deal with me for this long! ‘cause he loves me! And no one else will love me like he does. S-so just shut up!”

Logan stood up as well and took an unsure step towards them. They looked so weak, as if a single push from the wind would make them crumble. 

“It’s okay. I hear what you are saying” Logan assured.

“An-and it’s like- Virgil needs me! And I need him! That’s like how it works! I can’t just leave him! What if- who will calm him down from his panic attacks?! And if I leave what if he gets s-so upset and like anxious he hurts himself! He’s said there was a chance he would!! I can’t risk it! I have to stay! He needs me! I-I need- I can’t- I can’t leave”

Logan nodded along “It’s okay. I understand. I understand”

“You don’t! You’re a idiotic bitch! I hope all your stupid fucking ties get destroyed in the washer!” Remy was close to yelling.

“Harsh but I see your point. To be honest everything you have said has made me even more worried. From my experience a relationship shouldn’t make you feel this way! It shouldn’t make you come up with reasons to stay! It shouldn’t hurt you!” Logan reached out to comfort them once more. “I promise it shouldn’t hurt”

“It’s not hurting me! YOU are hurting me!”

Logan was taken aback. He didn’t know what to say. His arms moved to hang helplessly along his sides. Remy opened their mouth to say something more but then

“Hey uh what’s going on? Are you roleplaying a death match?” Remus stood in the entrance to the building. He glanced between the two of them.

“This idiot is trying to destroy my relationship!” Remy exclaimed.

“While it is not my place to explain the full situation without their permission I can assure you that I am merely worrying for their mental and physical health and I am unsure if their relationship is good for them from what I’ve heard” Logan explained.

Remus barely even hesitated before moving in front of Remy. He moved his arms out and let them lean against him to catch their breathe, like he was a human shield protecting them from Logan. 

Logan hadn’t seen Remus angry before and he didn’t look fully enraged, but there was a hint of anger in eyes as he sneered at him.

“Well I’m sorry Loganson but not every relationship is totally perfect and works without any arguments like you and your wife relationship apparently does!” He spat out.

“I can assure you that me and my wife’s relationship hasn’t been argument free but that doesn’t mean I have ever even thought about insulting her like Remy’s boyfriend seemingly ha-”

“You’re not Remy!” Remus snapped “You’re a guy who dresses like a 40 year old math teacher who is losing the children in the divorce! Leave them alone!” 

Remy was bordering on cowering behind Remus. Their whole body seemed to shake as a few tears spilled down their cheeks. They met Logan’s eyes.

“If the bullshit you’re saying is true, which it like isn’t but if it was that- that means I’ve spent my whole life being abused” They forced out through tears “How can you Ever you expect me to live with that?”

Logan didn’t have an answer to that. He watched on as Remus placed his hands on Remy’s shoulders and gently guided them to turn away. He bonked their foreheads together and wiped their tears away.

“C’mon beanie-boo I can take you to the amusement park to cheer you up! Or we can find some lsd and get high so you can hallucinate beating the shit out of the stinky Log guy!” Remus exclaimed as they walked away.

A headache began to form in Logan’s head as he slumped back down on the bench. He stared out at the nearly empty parking lot. He didn’t understand what he did wrong. 

He wished he could talk to Virgil. He wished he could see him eye to eye and chew him out for ever making Remy feel like a burden, for ever making them feel trapped. A part of him wanted to punch him.

He was so zoned out into the overthinking he didn’t realize how much time was passing until Janus got out from his therapy session. As soon as Jan saw his boyfriend he let up into a shining smile and hurried over to him.

“Hi dear! Aww did you miss me so much you had to come pick me up! How charming!” Janus hesitated before kissing Logan on the lips. It still made him all giggly.

Normally seeing him so giddy would have made Logan overabundant with happiness....but now all he could think about was if he should tell Janus about Remy’s situation or not. They were friends right? Could it help? Would they listen to their friend?

Logan’s head hurt so bad. None of it made sense. There was no logical answer. How Janus reacted could make everything worse. He didn’t want to ruin everything more than he already had.

“Darling? Are you feeling alright? Has something happened?” Janus asked while taking his hand.

“I....I....” Logan looked over to you.

Logan: “I am so sorry to do this but do you have any idea what to do? The human emotion and it’s reactions are so illogical I don’t- I don’t understand- I don’t know what to do. I’m sorry- Should I tell Janus about the suspected abuse or should I lie?”

[etherealluminescence]

Shdjdjjddjjs okay but, more buff cat hcs when ?? But seriously, i know it probably counts as crack hc but i enjoyed it way to much i cant get it out of my head anymore, i havent laught so much in a while now sjdjchdj. I sure hope the buff cat saga will continue !!

You know what? I’ll give you some buff cat content now. 😤 my school work can wait. And trust me, the buff cat saga WILL continue. I just tend to work on requests first rather than my own wants haha.

I’m really happy you like buff cat! Buff cat is my life now. Constantly haunted by buff cat. Maybe one day I’ll introduce a girlfriend or friends for buff cat too 🤔

Maybe I’ll do a background about buff cat and how they met MC?? And why buff cat is so attached to MC? I don’t know. 👉👈 maybe if someone requests, otherwise I’ll just do whatever I feel like in the moment.

Anyone can also feel free to request any buff cat scenarios!! If not I’ll think of some up. THIS IS SO LONG IM SORRY. I WROTE THIS LIKE 1 HOUR OR SOMETHING STRAIGHT AHA.

The boys react to buff cat teaching you

Lucifer

Lucifer had noticed your grades were improving recently, and wanted to take you out to eat for working so hard to both keep up with your class.

When he came to your room, he saw a scene that honestly shouldn’t of surprised him, but did anyways.

You were sitting at your desk, books sprawled across the entire surface area of it. On top of a book pile was buff cat, wearing a pair of glasses, and he was using a pointer to show you important parts you should remember.

He watched in awe as you two never exchanged any words, but you were scribbling down definitions and important notes, while buff cat turned the pages and reviewed your work.

He’s gotten fairly use to buff cat cooking, cleaning, intimidating others, but he has never seen buff cat act like a teacher before, it was sort of new, and he even had a teacher outfit.

He swears that he never sees you buying these outfits, or that people in the devildom actually sell muscular cat clothing.

Buff Cat is the first to break the silence, looking over at Lucifer and positioning his pointer at Lucifer’s head, and then to in front of your desk.

You were still focused on your studying, knowing that you were steadily improving. Buff Cat got out a notepad from one of your desk drawers, and wrote “Leave what you require on this note, I am instructing MC right now, and when we are done tutoring I will give this note to them.”

Lucifer ended up having to take a rain check on taking you out to eat, and learned that your cat has really advanced vocabulary.

Mammon

He was failing the majority of his classes, and ended up asking you for help. You were his best shot, and you seemed to be passing all of your classes with flying colours.

You said you were happy to help him! Except that someone else was actually helping you study. They were a very efficient teacher.

He was relieved to hear that you’d introduce your teacher to him, until he found out it was that fucking demon spawn from hell.

He screeched so hard and ran out of the room, crying like a girl. “aAAAAaaaaAAAH”

Mammon is terrified of buff cat, and now you’re telling him this cat has the intelligence of a genius? You came to the devildom like a few months ago how is this cat tutoring you and making you pass your classes with ease??

He swears your cat is trying to plot for world domination or something. Will NEVER ask you to study with him again.

Leviathan

You walked into Levi’s room trying to find buff cat. It was a Sunday, which was typically a boys night out between them, but it was getting pretty late and you need to study.

There was a test tomorrow on devildom history, and you wanted to review one more time with buff cat, as to make sure you’ll do well on it.

“Mr. Kitty, are you here?” You called out, as soon as you said that Buff Cat paused the game and ran up to you. Levi was slightly annoyed as Buff Cat was beating a hard level for him, but he is your cat above all else.

You smiled as Buff Cat greeted you, and apologised for interrupting them. You explained to Levi how you wanted to review for the test, and if it wasn’t an issue could he spare around 20 minutes?

Levi huffed and agreed and called you a normie, and was about to pick up his switch when your words finally set in.

You put down the book you were carrying and got out a pencil, and took a piece of paper out of the book. You began writing down all of the important stuff on the paper while Buff Cat watched over your shoulder.

When you were finished, he went into the book with you and showed you a couple things you’ve missed or had forgotten, and then got you to write it down three times each as to remember. He even wrote a few essay questions for you which you got.

Levi was impressed. Not only did Buff Cat seem to know the whole devildom history by heart, he knew the exact pages and lines, and even how to write.

He didn’t really care as long as Buff Cat beats the hard level for him. He just considers it to be cool.

Satan

Satan was impressed with your high grades. It must be hard for a human to suddenly learn about a whole new realm, right? So if you had Cs he would understand, but you were getting 97s and 94s.

He understood everything when he started to notice what kind of books Buff Cat had been reading in his room, recently.

You all were having a test on curses soon, and Buff Cat came by his room and began looking for books about curses, and similar ones to what you all had been learning about.

Satan ended up chuckling to himself and found it amusing. It was amazing how your cat even spent his free time coming to someone’s room, finding books for your tests, and reads them before going back to you to help you understand the content.

He likes to get coffee with Buff Cat and talk about the stuff you’re learning in classes, he never directly said it to you, but he helps Buff Cat find specific books when Buff Cat comes over.

Asmodeous

Lucifer decided to punish the house of lamentations by taking away all of their electronics after they did something stupid again. The only way to earn it back, was through getting an 80% or higher on their next test.

You and Asmo suffered because you would normally look up answer during your test, and Asmo had no social media or contact with any of his friends with benefits.

You two weren’t ashamed to beg Buff Cat for help to pass your next test. He was probably the smartest in the house. He goes to Satan’s room almost every day and purchased books when he goes out. Your cat even tutored you when you were in elementary school.

You and Asmo barely needed to convince Buff Cat, as he was ecstatic to help you again. He’d do anything to help you, and was even willing to help Asmo out as well.

Asmo thought that Buff Cat looked REALLY adorable in his teacher’s outfit. A suit, tie, glasses, and his claws were so shiny from their manicure earlier.

Buff cat even slicked his fur back to look like he gel’d his hair. He was a literal fashion icon. Asmo could do some sewing, but nothing to the degree Buff Cat did.

Buff Cat had so many outfits he made himself, and he even did them so quickly. They all turned out perfect. Oh right, this was about studying wasn’t it?

Asmo never really asked questions about why your cat could just be so smart, and more so focused on how cool your cat looked. Priorities.

Beelzebub

Beel and Buff Cat are gym buddies, so naturally they’d walk home together from the gym. Everything was fine until Buff Cat’s MC senses were tingling, and began to walk towards you, crouching down in a store trying to figure out which notebooks to buy.

Beel thought it was pretty cool Buff Cat knew where you were, like how he and Belphie were that close to each other.

Brel asked you what you were doing, and you explained that you wanted to get some new notebooks because your old one is messy and confusing. You just scribbled whatever you could down, and were having a bit of a hard time in class.

Buff Cat immediately perked up, and you two seemed to have a conversation. He meowed and you happily said “I’d love that!”

Apparently, Buff Cat had offered to tutor you. Beel wasn’t so sure how well your cat could teach, though, considering he still is a cat, and offered to help you as well, since he wouldn’t like to see you sad from overworking yourself.

He was scribbling notes alongside with you five minutes into your first session together. Buff Cat wrote such simple explanations, and even prepared notecards ahead of time, Beel forgot he was supposed to teach you.

He is pretty fine with Buff Cat teaching you both, and once again forgets that Buff Cat is a “normal”? cat and not some weird creature that knows the answer to life.

Belphegor

Is really fucking terrified of your buff cat. Like TERRIFIED. So when he sees your cat in a teacher’s outfit sitting at the dinning room table, teaching you math, he was frozen.

He came down to get a glass of milk but what is this. Do you- do you have to do it in the living room?

There is no other reaction than physical fear coursing through his body his adrenaline is at the highest and his fight or flight instincts kick in.

He’s already fought once and that caused Buff Cat to exist in constant Buff form around him, so you can bet he is running.

Probably has a group chat with Mammon and Luke. “Buff Cat Conspiracy”. They talk about how scary buff cat is.

Diavolo

Buff Cat told Diavolo he was the one who helped you study. They were having conversation (buff cat used a notebook) and the topic of your studies came up. He mentioned how he had been helping you study, and understand the terminology in the Devildom better.

He was happy to hear that you understood it, and that it wasn’t too complicated for either of you too.

He actually asks if he can watch your study sessions, to see if he needs to lighten your workload just in case you’re pushing yourself too much.

You two allow him to watch, and he’s giving soft claps and smiles as the two of you give it your best.

Is honestly very happy with how much you two get along, and how you say it’s very simple since Buff Cat explains(meows) it in a very efficient manner.

He already knew Buff Cat was smart, but haha. Maybe he should hire Buff Cat to be a teacher or support class teacher for RAD?

Barbatos

You had grown accustomed to the devildom these past few months, and with Buff Cat with you, you were allowed to freely explore it when you want.

Buff Cat also happens to have a spare key to open the castle when he wishes.

Exam/testing season was coming up, and you knew you couldn’t study at the house of lamentation.

It was very distracting, and so you decided to go to the castle. No one will be screaming there, or trying to convince you your cat is a weird entity trying to plot world domination.

Barbatos was sort of used to seeing Buff Cat come and go as he pleases, but why were you here? Before he could say anything, you told him that you were visiting to study! And that you hope he didn’t mind that Buff Cat was going to tutor you.

Alright, so you’re studying, but why at the castle? You had to explain that it was very distracting at the house of lamentations, and Mammon was trying to convince you to get rid of your cat 24/7.

Ah, he could see that. Your cat isn’t exactly normal, and Mammon does occasionally scream like a girl. I promise I love Mammon. But it’s not like he minded, so long as you two were quiet and actually studied.

He left to clean for a bit, and when he returned to the guest room he saw you wearing a headband, violently writing down and muttering definitions at an insane pace. Buff Cat was in a teacher’s outfit, and holding out flash cards.

He’s slightly taken aback, but doesn’t show it anywhere on his face. He has never seen you so serious before, and neither has he seen Buff Cat so focused on you, as well.

He’s quite proud of you two for your hard work and dedication. He doesn’t interrupt but instead pours you three cups of tea, Buff Cat thanks him, and watches over you two.

Solomon

Solomon invited you over for a study session. He may be a little shady, but he does care for you, as a fellow human.

He was ecstatic to see Buff Cat come with you, because he still wants to dissect your cat.

He was about to talk to you about letting him research you cat, but you made yourself comfortable on his bed, and Buff Cat began to put on glasses and take out a pointer.

He didn’t have anytime to talk beforehand, as you were highlighting certain areas of your book, your cat pointing to certain parts, and you patted the bed beside you for Solomon to join.

Solomon’s plans to dissect your cat are set back another day, but he takes great interest in the way he teaches. Your cat is very methodical about how to remember things, and explains(meows) it rather simply.

He swears that your cat is not a normal human cat, but why can he sense literally zero magic power from it? If only Buff Cat could teach him that.

Solomon also gets 100% on the next test by remembering everything the way Buff Cat had taught you two.

Simeon

Absolutely chaotic man, when he sees you and Buff Cat in a classroom when school was over, he approached you two, and said hello.

You greeted him, and so did Buff Cat. He asked what you were doing after school so late, and that it was dangerous for the two of you. Buff Cat not so much but could still be in danger.

You told him you were studying for the upcoming test, and that Buff Cat was helping you.

Simeon was like!!! 💖👉👈💖💖💖💖🥰🥰🥺🥺 could I join?? This sounds so fun!! Buff Cat is so smart!!

He does not question the fact he’s studying with a cat, learning from a cat, or just how nice your cat can write on paper, like perfect handwriting.

He has such chaotic energy that he’s just like you, what a cute cat!

Luke

no.

just no.

he’s fine with your cat but does your cat have to be in buff form when you’re being taught?

he is happy you are getting good grades but please get him away from buff form buff cat.

[fukurodaze]

haikyuu!! third gym squad taking the ib diploma programme

ok... my friend and i got rlly stressed the other day and made headcanons for these guys if they were to take classes in the ib... it’s like a levels but like... a bit more death!

for my ib diploma folks you can just hop on over and read what i’ve hc’d but for my non-ib folks, lemme give you a bit of an introduction to the ib diploma programme.

characters included: bokuto koutarou, kuroo tetsurou, akaashi keiji, tsukishima kei, haiba lev, hinata shouyou

THE IB DIPLOMA PROGRAMME is a rigorous two-year pre-college program in your last two years of high school. a full programme consists of one class from each of the six required groups (totalling to 6 classes), which are G1 - first language; G2 - second language; G3 - social sciences; G4 - natural sciences; G5 - mathematics; and G6 - arts (though, arts is optional, and can be switched out with another subject from G3 or G4).

within these six courses, students are required to take at least three high-level (HL) courses and three standard level courses (SL), but some students may take four HL courses and have two SL courses (kind of a rough one tho). 

just to note: there’s two types of math courses - applications and interpretations (Math AI) and analysis and approaches (Math AA). MAA courses are known to be harder than MAI courses because students do more theory work and have non-calculator sections in exams, unlike MAI courses where calculators are required for every exam. also, it is possible for a person to take IB courses instead of the full diploma programme, but i’m not very well acquainted with that variation of the IB programme so we’re just going to assume all the boys got 6 courses.

okay. i am so sorry i just lectured you on a whole school curriculum. anyways. back to haikyuu!!

BOKUTO KOUTAROU : Japanese Language and Literature HL, Mandarin Ab Initio SL, Geography HL, SEHS (Sports, Exercise, and Health Science) HL, Math AI SL, Economics SL

ok so it’s canon that this dude is not doing very well in math but his parents made him do higher level math at first poor boy >:(

he started the year off in higher level and thought he was gonna be fine

no. he was not fine.

so he ended up switching his math hl to sl and his japanese sl to hl

IT IS CANON (special chapter in volume 19 titled “i just forgot” where bokuto has a wholeass crisis about words) that bokuto’s really one to actually really like to think about how words work and function as systems in the same way ib language courses do!!

actually having him do japanese ll hl is just an excuse for me to keep him in math sl sorry

i mean koutarou may be my fav tax evader but he really did sit through two years worth of econ classes... smh

mans is Not listening and has to rely on yukie for notes but he just memorises case studies for exams and does not do anything else

i feel like he just takes mandarin because he thought it was the easiest one... he also thinks the words sound similar so it’s easy to memorise

he’s a pretty good communicator so he practices his mandarin quite a lot. as in, he’s made friends to talk to in mandarin. we love to see it!!!

also. um. i hc that he’s pretty decent at memorisation so geography!! this goes for memorising all the kanji and mandarin characters too

i think SEHS is pretty self-explanatory. mans already known he wanna be a pro athlete might as learn about being healthy as an athlete

KUROO TESTUROU : Japanese Language and Literature SL, English B SL, Business Management HL, Chemistry HL, Math AI HL, Biology HL

now... we all know this mf been taking chemistry hl. it is CANON

and as per his career path... DEFINITELY business management hl

i feel like he’s so analytical in the way he sees things that he likes to explore many areas of knowledge where there are different ways of thinking

takes english as a second language because... whew.. aint it sexy when mans wanna be multifaceted in business

also takes higher level biology because he’d rather not with the languages... but later on i believe he ends up in a higher level language class because he might as well

i feel like kuroo’s classes just give me a vibe i know too too well... 

mans takes math ai. he does not wanna fuck around with a pencil proving a theorem he just wants the answer bro

like in volleyball, he’s a quick thinker. so he’s pretty g with math and business stuff

i literally know someone with this class combo ... it’s not very chill but it screams “you never see me do any course work but i always get at least a B+ in every subject”

AKAASHI KEIJI :  Japanese Language and Literature HL, French Ab Initio SL, Psychology HL, Chemistry SL, Math AA SL, Visual Arts HL

now... this subject combo radiates such pretty energy

pretty subjects for a pretty boy

he was originally going to do biology sl but then found out there is chemistry in biology so he just decided with chemistry. plain and simple.

we all know akaashi is both emotionally and academically intelligent

he’s logical and analytical, and when faced with a tough time he works through it well albeit going through a little bit of struggle

this automatically puts him in math aa... i just see him actually liking proving theorems??? 

but maybe he just thinks his calculator is a nuisance sometimes and would rather solve everything by hand 

also art boy! this dude likes graphic design more but when it comes to traditional art he does Not Hold Back

i like to think that he’s into painting backgrounds and mixed media

if he didn’t take VA, i’m pretty sure he would take economics. because. it’s quite systematic and i think akaashi would take a liking to it

as for japanese ll hl... we all know this dude was supposed to be a part of the literary section in a magazine/manga company but was moved to editor

goes hand-in-hand with psychology, likes to know how words convey meaning and how they affect people

he also thinks french is kind of a cool language. i feel like this guy just wants to do it because it sounds cool and novel for him

all in all, pretty solid subject combo!

TSUKISHIMA KEI : Japanese Language and Literature HL, French Ab Initio SL, History HL, Biology SL, Math AA HL, Instrumental Music HL

4 hl’s... here we are folks

honestly does it for colleges to go like “holy shit this dude is kinda crazy”

but does suffer... coursework tings :)

first of all this dude takes french (even though it’s a beginner’s class) because he just loves to sound cool huh

the summer before his courses started he would have had the basics down after looking through free ib textbooks

plus, being the guy that’s super good at a new language in the class is a huge ass flex and a big ass ego boost. and anyways, with language, he thinks it’s just a lot of simple patterns working together.

this also applies to japanese ll hl... finds writing essays and making arguments ez (at least that’s what he tells himself - he’s kinda nervous when it comes to japanese but he holds on anyway)

practices extra hard on pronunciation. sounds hot tho

math aa hl??? there we go. another crazy one. thought he could ace the class at first.... no. no he couldn’t 

thinks about moving down to sl. probably does. (at least it’s not math ai)

history and biology go hand in hand for him. he has significant interests in prehistoric times, and likes to learn about the origins of life - that’s a given

but he does get tired of the politics talk in history like... goddamn all these people making so many mistakes? just stop making them smh

and instrumental music was just something he got onto because he really would like to just have a course where he could enjoy himself while also learning about the stuff he likes

nobody knows what music he listens to... but i think he’s willing to listen to anything as long as it’s music and it has the kinds of vibes he digs

HAIBA LEV: Japanese Language and Literature SL, Mandarin Ab Initio SL, Psychology HL, Chemistry SL, Math AI HL, Theatre HL

i don’t know how to explain it but lev has such strong psych and chem energy

yes haiba lev’s classes are the ones i picked via roulette wheel

jk not really

here’s the thing though, lev takes psychology because he thinks econ, business management, history, ess, all that jazz is just... absolutely boring. like. super. mf-ing. boring.

so he’s like ooh cognitive processes!

kinda hates that he has to study research methods and research methods ONLY at first but when he gets the hang of it he really finds it one of his fav subs

i actually have no explanation for mandarin ab initio sl... he just seemed like the kind of guy who would wanna do the class solely because he thinks mandarin sounds cool with their intonations and everything

plus he heard that the teacher gives mooncakes every lunar new year ad he. loves. them.

okay now hear me out.

lev is good at math.

maybe not lightning speed analysis or calculations like akaashi, but he finds solving problems fun! except for when they’re without a calculator bc he HATES doing calculations by hand

he can get a bit clumsy with his hand calculations too so it’s nice to just have a calculator on hand

literally only does math ai for the sake of using a calculator at all times (a/n: i take this class, and this was the reason i took it too. COMPLETELY VALID)

and then does theatre for the fun of it!!! confidence levels high for presentations and performances... good fit

kinda thought that ib theatre would be his easy A but oh how he was wrong... hates the research tasks at first but he gets used to it

HINATA SHOUYOU: Japanese Language and Literature SL, Portuguese Ab Initio SL, SEHS HL, Geography HL, Math AI SL, Theatre HL

his classes are bokuto energy but with theatre and portuguese

MANGA SPOILERS! we all know he started thinking abt going to brazil in his second year of high school, and the ib diploma programme starts in the last two years of high school so it fits PERFECTLY

lowkey most of the boys take japanese ll sl because they just. have to.

this is also hinata’s case <3

SEHS HL!!! he has a vision for the future and it definitely involves him understanding health and sports and everything like that, especially after nationals in his first year :(((( still sad abt that

but he’s motivated for this higher level class because he’s really just gonna go all out with the research

math ai sl because... he prolly don’t give a fuck about numbers!!! (it hasn’t been made clear already, but math ai sl is the lowest level math course)

he also took theatre hl because even though he does get scared at first, he’s a natural when it comes to learning new cultures

he’s just so curious about it all and it makes him quite engaged in the class as well!!!!

also kinda took theatre because the other subjects were just not it for him

about geography... he hates memorisation but he also hates everything else in the social studies group so

he just gets by by trying to find the little details of the things he’s studying interesting because really... geography class is just the base of all the places on his bucket list

hinata’s def one of those dudes who picks his subs purely off of liking because we all know he’s going. any subject that isn’t based off of liking is usually a mandatory subject anyways

[lgbtyrus]

Definitely

A Tarty fanfic? In October of 2020? You bet!!! This is a gift for @delicatesleeper who deserves the world’s most patient person award <3  Enjoy!

Words: 3068

High school was fun because you saw a lot of different things. Kids chanting Lick it! Lick it! to another kid going to lick a weird stain in the science building. An artsy kid having a break down in the middle of math. TJ Kippen fighting another boy in the locker room.

“TJ is fighting Carson!” Marty’s best friend, Tony, announced to him in one corner of the locker room. There was dozens of voices echoing throughout the stuffy place, and Marty could feel his heart slam against his chest every step he took towards the scene. But by the time he got there, their PE teacher had already separated the two. TJ seemed to get in a good hit as Carson hid his blood nose under his arm, not realizing blood was already dripping down at his chin.

“What in the fucking hell were you two thinking?!” their PE teacher’s voice boomed over them. “You’re both going to get kicked off the basketball team.”

“He started it!” TJ yelled, looking furious. His face was read. Marty didn’t know TJ that well, but he knew he wasn’t violent. Sure, he had a temper. But dating Cyrus Goodman for a while had to have done something good to him. Then again, break ups completely reprogram a person. Marty would know. He’s been through five.

Marty was sitting in detention, leaning back on his chair, balancing a pencil on his nose. It was him and the other kids who were regularly in there. Marty tried not to get detention so much he got kicked off the track team, but he also didn’t like doing his homework.

The teacher who looked over detention wasn’t in the classroom yet, so everyone in there was just talking and scrolling through their phones. They only looked up when someone came in, but it was usually someone they all recognized or knew pretty well.

Then TJ Kippen walked in and the pencil fell into his hand. Marty watched him walk inside the badly lit classroom, look around, and sit in the desk next to him before realizing he hadn’t stopped staring. TJ raised an eyebrow at him, making Marty panic and look away, pretending his pencil was the most interesting thing. He felt like if slightly turning his head would kill him.

Mr. Rosas walked in, whistling with a book and paper under his arm like usual. “Alright, people. Phones away. You can take them out after thirty minutes of homework.” He went to the front and put his book at the empty desk for whoever was overlooking detention. The room was in a trailer lot in the corner of their school, and it was hard to find if you never got in trouble. Mr. Rosas started reading the names of the roster, some kids saying here, some kids being recognized by him.

“TJ Kippen?” Mr. Rosas looked up. Marty turned his head and saw that TJ raised his hand. He had a heavy frown on his lips. “Aren’t you in basketball?”

“Not anymore.” TJ sighed, leaning back into his chair.

“Oh. You’re one of those two basketball players from today, no?” Mr. Rosas asked him. TJ nodded, looking embarrassed that everyone knew. Marty had been hearing everyone talking about TJ and Carson all day long, and it was making him really curious to know what happened. Nobody knows what happened. The two went inside the locker rooms laughing and then TJ threw the first hit.

Mr. Rosas finished taking attendance, and Marty realized that Carson wasn’t there. That usually meant an extra two days of detention. Marty forced himself to stop thinking about TJ and Carson and pulled out his algebra homework. Some kids were chatting with their work out on their desks, and Mr. Rosas didn’t seem to mind. He was in a good mood that day which basically meant they could do whatever they wanted. He said he always had a soft spot for misfits because he basically lived in detention in high school but had a good director that helped him get into college.

“Hey, Marty,” someone called out. Marty turned around the room, looking for the voice. “Right here, dude.” Marty made eye contact with TJ who was holding up a piece of paper. It was their homework. “Can you show me how to do four?” Marty looked at him, in shock for a bit. “Your name is Marty, right?”

“Um, yeah,” Marty said. He cleared his throat and looked down at his homework, trying to remember his steps while a storm brewed in his brain. “I dated Buffy freshman year.” Really? That’s what you say? Dumbass.

“I know who you are.” TJ told him. Marty didn’t know how to reprogram himself to work, but he cleared his throat again and held up his math sheet to him.

“Let me walk you through it.”

TJ only needed help on two other problems after that, and Marty gladly helped him even when he was done with his homework. His moms had gotten mad at him for not taking AP classes, but he didn’t like to be challenged in academics. They weren’t interesting enough.

Mr. Rosas stood up and shut his book. “All right everyone, you’re dismissed for the day. Don’t come back.” Without hesitation, everyone scrambled out of their seats and made their way out of the classroom in a line. Marty’s track practice started at 4:30 because his coach knew a lot of the kids on the team had a knack for getting kept for detention or they had other clubs besides sports. Marty just had detention.

He made his way towards the locker rooms by the gym and track field, and after walking for a moment, he noticed TJ was right behind him. Marty decided against walking faster and instead met up with TJ who gave him a head nod in acknowledgment. “Where are you of to?” Marty asked him.

“I’m not sure. I’ve never left school this early.”

“You should go to Rita Donuts. She has student discounts on Wednesdays.”

“Good to know.”

“So,” Marty said. He cleared his throat. He didn’t know how else to keep the conversation going. “What happened in the locker room.”

“What have you heard?” TJ asked him.

“Honestly, everything.” Marty crossed his arms, walking a little closer to TJ who was now heading towards the school gates, opposite of the locker rooms. Instead of saying anything, Marty continued to walk besides him.

“He said something homophobic. I punched him. That’s that.” Marty couldn’t figure TJ out. He was stoic and saying everything like he hadn’t just gotten kicked off the basketball team- the one he was captain of as a junior.

“What?” Marty asked. He had heard many things except that. Something like that wasn’t even a possibility at their high school. “And you’re both off the team?”

“He’s suspended and maybe expelled. I just got off the team because of the no tolerance policy. They said they’ll make sure I can play next year, though.”

“Well, I guess that’s kind of good?” Marty said, still not understanding how the school worked.

“Yeah. Honestly, it’s fine,” TJ admitted to him. “I can focus on actually getting good grades for now. I’m scared I’m not going to pass algebra.”

“I can tutor you,” Marty said without second thought.

“Really?” TJ smiled at him. Marty blushed crimson and nodded dumbfoundedly. “Thanks. I have you on Snapchat, no?”

“Yeah,” Marty nodded again. He couldn’t say much of anything else. He wasn’t even that good at math.

“Cool. I’ll hit you up,” TJ told him.

“Yeah,” Marty said. He looked at the time on his phone. “I’m gonna head to practice now. See you.”

“Later.” Marty smiled at him once more and ran towards the gym with his heart slamming against him like he wasn’t a trained runner. Math just got interesting.

-

Marty didn’t know what he was doing, why he was nervous, or why he even had a brain if it wasn’t going to work and save him from humiliating situations. TJ was going over to his house on Saturday to get help for their test on Monday, and Marty wasn’t exactly a wizard. He got in his shower after his six mile run from that morning and dressed in eight different things until deciding to wear a track shirt and jeans.

He didn’t have time to do his hair when his mom called from downstairs that TJ was there. He slid across the second floor in his socks and ran downstairs, TJ waiting for him at the door. He was smiling and talking to his mom, wearing a plain white shirt, basketball shorts, and slides. Marty definitely felt overdressed.

“Hey,” Marty waved at him.

“Hey,” TJ said, bringing his backpack higher on his shoulder.

“You can wait in the dining room,” Marty said, pointing at the entryway. “I need to get my backpack.” TJ gave him a thumbs up and walked over as Marty ran back upstairs, his heartrate a complete mess even when he ran back down.

“Do you run everywhere?” TJ asked him when he sat down in the chair next to him. Marty nodded, taking in counted breaths.

“It’s faster. You should try it.”

“Maybe when I’m back in shape.”

Marty stifled a full laugh. “You’ve only been out of basketball for like four days.”

“I breathe hard when I go up the stairs now. Four days was all I needed.”

“I run at least six miles every.”

“You’re addicted to track.”

“Sounds about right,” Marty smiled. He took out his binder and homework.

He didn’t know how he did it, but he got TJ through the course work and got him ready for the test. Marty had never studied that much on his own before since math was just a regular subject to him. Studying with TJ was fun, though. Whenever he tried to study with Tony, they ended up messing around and playing video games because they got bored.

But everything about TJ kept him grounded, like he was scared he would miss years of his life if he looked away for even just a second. It was too much for Marty to try to process sometimes, and he often tried to rub the heat away from his cheeks.

-

Marty and TJ hung out more outside of tutoring. TJ had a lot of time on his hands, and his friends were still going to basketball games so Marty would invite him to hang out with Tony and a few other boys. Tony raised his eyebrow one time when Marty was sad TJ wouldn’t make it to bowling, but when Marty asked him what, Tony just laughed and shook his head. That’s how Marty knew he was fucked.

TJ was in that stage months post breakup where he wasn’t gloomy about it anymore and he was back to functioning like normal again, but you could tell he had put a barrier up. There were times when TJ would almost talk about his home life or his family or even how he felt about certain things, but there always something blocking him. Like if he remembered he would only talk about those certain things to a certain someone who broke his heart.

Marty approached TJ with as much caution as much as he threw himself at him. He felt delusional and crazy, but there were times he felt like TJ was starting to like him, too. The proximity in which they would walk side by side seemed to close in even closer every week, and Marty wasn’t the one inching next to him. But even though they were becoming good friends, Marty knew there was going to be a lot more walls to break down.

One day at the park, Marty broke down the first obstacle and asked TJ why him and Cyrus had broken up. “We just didn’t click anymore,” TJ said. “He broke up with me, and I just said ok.” Marty watched TJ fiddle with the basketball in his hand for a moment, about to speak up before TJ started talking again. “I wish I would’ve asked him to stay, though. But… I could tell that he just didn’t want me anymore.” Marty didn’t know what to do with that, so he just patted TJ on the back.

“Sorry, bud.”

“That’s just the way it is.” TJ threw the ball at Marty, and they got up for another game. The entire time Marty wondered if TJ would go back to Cyrus if he could.

Marty figured he had nothing to lose and asked, “Are you over him?” In that moment, TJ stood still with the basketball in his hands. He stared at Marty, making his breath hitch for a second as those green eyes looked for something. “Yeah. I basically am.”

Basically. Basically am. What does that mean? Marty asked himself that over and over that night, and it was starting to drive him insane. So much, he just gave in and called Tony at one in the morning.

Tony was half-asleep when he answered. “Hello?”

“Okay,” Marty jumped right into it, “you know how I like TJ right?” There was a few seconds of silence.

“Yes.”

“So, I asked him if he was over Cyrus, and he said he basically was. What does basically mean? Like he doesn’t want to say he is because he’s lying or he is in the process of fully forgetting him?”

“Um.” Tony yawned into the mic, hurting Marty’s ear with the buzz. “Both?”

“Tony that’s not helping.”

“Dude just tell him you like him.”

“I can’t do that.” Marty’s head was filling with air at just the thought of doing that. “It’d just ruin our friendship.”

“Hmm, I don’t know, man.” Marty knew that tone.

“What do you know?”

“What do you mean?” Tony repeated back. He was cornered.

“What are you keeping from me?”

“Nothing,” Tony’s voice got louder which meant he was lying.

“Just tell me and you can go to sleep.” Marty heard Tony sigh. It didn’t take that long to get him to crack. “He told one of the guys who told me that he thinks you’re… cute.”

“Cute?” Marty didn’t know what to do with the information.

“Yeah. Goodnight.” Marty didn’t even get to say it back as Tony hung up, leaving Marty with the most explosive words he could’ve left him with.

-

TJ always asked Marty to hang out before he had gotten the cute bomb dropped on him, so Marty told himself not to act any different or to pick apart every little thing TJ did like a fetal pig. Doing so was starting to give him a heartache. But when him and TJ were doing homework in Marty’s kitchen, there was just too much gut to not pick at.

TJ had lightly bumped his foot into Marty’s and then just kept it there. He told Marty he had nice handwriting (a lot of people told him that, though). He told Marty his hair looked nice, and Marty didn’t know how to react so he just ran his fingers through his hair and accidentally ruined it so TJ could jokingly say never mind. And at one point, TJ took the ring he had on his hand and slipped it on Marty’s finger, his race redder than it had ever been. TJ noticed it.

“Why is your face so red?” TJ asked, still holding Marty’s hand on the table. Marty looked between TJ’s face that held a sneaky smile and their fingers that were grazing on each other.

Marty hid his face with his free hand and said, “I think it’s just allergies.” Dumbass! Dumb! Dumb! Dumb boy. Allergies?!

TJ chuckled and pulled his hand back slightly. “I didn’t know allergies did that.”

“Yeah,” Marty tapped his ringed hand on the table. “My moms say the doctors don’t know what to do with me.”

TJ looked Marty in the eye as he whispered, “I don’t know what to do, either.” Marty looked at TJ with his eyebrow raised. It was his turn to make him spazz out.

“Are you trying to kill me?”

TJ raised an eyebrow, a smile twitching on his face. “What kind of doctors are you doing to?”

“I think they’re vampires. It works out so I don’t have to miss track practice during the day.” TJ rolled his eyes but not in a rude way. In a you’re not that funny way. But he was still smiling warmly. Marty looked at TJ, realizing how close he had him and how his green eyes were just diamonds on his face. His face was full of sharp features, and he wanted to run his finger on all of them. He reached out and touched TJ’s hand again, making him look at him with wide eyes. Marty was about to retreat his hand, when TJ grasped it, fully holding it and tapping on of his fingers on his ring.

“Do you like me?” TJ asked him. Okay so this is happening now!

“What do you think?” Marty said, showing him their hands. TJ laughed a little.

“I think you do,” TJ said quietly, looking at him with a small smile.

“I know you think I’m cute,” Marty couldn’t help but say. “A little birdy told me.”

TJ had a victorious look on his face. “I knew those two would snitch. I planned it out like that.”

“What?” Marty asked. “You told someone you thought I was cute so that they would tell Tony to tell me?” They both laughed after Marty tried to piece it together in the air.

“I don’t know how Tony got involved, but yeah. Something like that.”

“Why not just tell me?”

“Just in case you didn’t like me.” TJ shrugged. “Can’t really know if someone really wants you despite their words and actions that say they do.” Marty’s heart seemed to sigh as he realized what TJ was talking about. Marty stood up and go closer to TJ, leaning down to kiss him. TJ kissed him back, his hand squeezing his harder.

Marty pulled away and pressed his forehead against TJ’s, their eyes in each other’s worlds. “Well I definitely like you. A lot. And if you’re willing to, I’d like to take you out sometime.” TJ gave him a small kiss.

“I’d like that.”

[lovinlikeloki]

The Lone Wolf

Masterlist // 01

Warnings: Swearing

Word Count: 2.7k

Orlaith and I get off the bus and start walking down the road.

"Where are ye going?" Orlaith asks me.

"I'm away de Saint Marie's, ye wanny join me?" I tell her.

"Aye, sure why not?"

"I finished a job last night and didn't get de give Eoghan the card," I say, brandishing a gold colored card, "I need to get paid and get me next one."

"Why do you do this?" Orlaith asks, shaking her head at me.

"Eoghan's letting me stay in one of the rooms at Saint M's. I'm earning my keep, besides, the money's good."

"If you say so," she shrugs.

We keep walking and then I pull her sleeve, to show her the alley we need to walk down. We reach the end and I pull off my school blazer, shoving it in my school bag and exchanging it for my green and grey striped hoodie. I push open the door to the old Catholic school, I see that people are already in, clearly people like to start drinking early, well, if 5 in the afternoon is early to you.

I pull Orlaith to the bar and I slam the gold card on the bar, making Eoghan look at me. He takes the card and puts it in the out box, he then lifts a wad of cash and gives it to me. He begins to tell me that someone called for me, someone who called me 'Malen'kaya Volchitsa.' Only two people have ever called me that...and one's... not here anymore, so I know exactly who's after me. And just in case I didn't, the name she left, 'Cáileach,' was a nice hint. The witch is a smart one, I'll tell you that much.

(Little she-wolf) (Witch)

I take the number she left and smirk at the gold card.

"We'll take two cokes Eoghan," I tell him before going to the corner table by the door, my table.

Orlaith follows me to the table and sits across from me, "Why's a witch looking for you?"

"Because after leaving me for two years she's finally reaching out," I reply.

"Okay...and what the fuck does that mean?"

"What it means is that I'm gonny be leaving for a bit. My sister needs me, and I can't leave her hanging, 'sides, I owe her."

"You have a sister? Since when?" my confused friend asks.

"Not by blood, not by law she's... emotionally? my sister. Yeah, let's go with that. Basically when I went missing two years ago she was there, we bonded, and she saved me. That's all you need to know," I finish.

Eoghan brings us our drinks and we thank him, I hand him back a tenner, he tells me that he'll be behind the bar if I need him and that we'll talk about this job later.

Orlaith and I stay at the table for a bit while we finish our drinks, talking about our day and how much we hate our math teacher. Then Orlaith gets a text from her mam saying that she needs to head home to do homework and have some family time, whatever that is. I wouldn't know, it's been a while since I was at 'home'. It doesn't matter though, this, Saint Marie's the mercenary job fair of a bar, this is my home now.

When Orlaith leaves I head up to the bar and sit on a stool. I look up at the dead pool to see who's been picked this week, the dead pool is fun for me because as a minor I'm not allowed to get picked, I can just sit and watch the chaos. Only downside is that I can't pick anyone, so... I mean it's a two-way street, so I guess that's fair.

"So, what's this witch after?" Eoghan questions.

"Not sure," I reply honestly, "But whatever it is, it must be important. We haven't spoken in two years, and last time we spoke, he was still alive."

"Him as in-" Eoghan begins.

"Yes, he as in my grá cáilte. She didn't even call me then, so whatever this is has de be big. It better be, or I might just hang up."

(Lost love)

"You won't. The stories you've told me- you wouldn't leave her. If you did you'd hate yourself. You can't bring do stóirín back, he's gone, but you can still help her."

(Your darling)

"You're right, it just breaks my heart, I had to find out they escaped from rumors and stories, but I found out that he died by watching it, live on tv. We had so much potential, he had so much potential, but now I'll never know. Glac siad a anam ró-ghasta."

(They took his soul too soon)

"You're right. But now she needs you. So go find out what the witch wants, and try your damndest to deliver," he says.

"I will," I say, smiling at him sadly, "Thanks, E."

"Not a bother," he assures me, smirking, "Mactíre."

(Wolf)

° ∆ -------- ••• ------- ∆ ° ∆ -------- ••• ------- ∆ °

I dial the number, she picks up after a single ring.

"Wanda, it's been a while," I say, trying to stay happy even though I know hearing her voice again will probably bring tears.

"Fianna, it has," she says, and I inhale sharply. No tears, not now, not yet at least.

"So, what do you need me for so urgently?" I begin to cut the shit.

"I need help. I need a friend, I need a soldier. Are you available for some last-minute travelling?" she says hesitantly. Clearly I'm a last resort, a "break glass in case of emergency" type help.

"Of course, when and where?" I ask.

"I need you to get to Leipzig-Altenburg Airport asap. We'll get you where you need to be from there," Wanda explains.

"Yeah, uh, when exactly do you mean by asap?"

"I mean, like literally buy a last-minute flight and get on it, within the next two hours. It'll be a two-hour flight, I'll pick you up and we'll get where we need to go."

"Alright, fine. I just need to know, what I'm up against. You said you needed a soldier? I need to know what I'm fighting for before starting a war."

"This is... the fight of a lifetime. You'll be fighting for truth and... safety. Who you'll be up against? Some of my closest friends and some of the deadliest assassins in the last thirty years. Now are you in or are you out? I don't blame you if you're out, but it would really help."

Wanda sounds... more than desperate, she's hopeless, she needs me, more than she ever has. I've fought many's a fierce foe in my time, but Avengers? Deadly assassins? That's usually more than a smidge above my paygrade. But she needs me, she's calling in her last favor, she clearly thinks I'm up for it. I hesitate for a second, weighing my options before making a life-changing decision.

"I'm in. I'll be there in four hours, max," and with that I hang up.

Guess I'm going to Germany.

I walk back into the bar and go through the side door that brings me to the lodging. I go to my room at sit on my bed. I'm leaving. I begin to pack my shit, I pull my kitbag out from under my bed and begin filling it with clothes. Leggings, t-shirts, hoodies, leather jackets, everything I might need. I pack all the essentials and then begin to think of how I'll smuggle my brass knuckles through security. I lift my mattress and take out a couple hundred pounds in cash, shove it in my wallet and keep packing.

When I'm all packed I begin to forge a note from my 'mother' for the school so that I can get time off without them calling up people who haven't seen me in over a year and a half. I make a simple excuse of appendicitis, was rushed to hospital late tonight blah blah, they won't really care, the school year's nearly over. I just need something for show so that I don't get called out.

I text Orlaith, letting her know I'm being called out of the country. She questions me at first, but when I explain that Wanda needs me, and I can't let her down she lets me be. She says she'll drop in and pick up the note tomorrow morning before getting on the 212 to Coláiste Feirste.

(Belfast College {It's an Irish speaking high school})

Now I've just got to talk to Eoghan. I tell him to come to the lodging hall, behind the bar. He serves the last couple of drinks that were ordered and joins me in the back.

"I have de go de Germany," I tell him, "It seems above my paygrade, but she needs me and I gotta be there for her."

"Okay... do ye have enough for the flight?" he simply asks.

"Aye, I've got all I need, me kitbag's packed an' everythin'."

"Ye said above yer paygrade. What'd ye mean by that?"

"I'm not just fighting with Wanda's friends. I'm also fighting against a couple o' them."

"What? Naw- What the fuck Fianna!"

"Look, she needs me, Eoghan, I can't just leave her."

"You're not fighting them assholes."

"Yeah, I am, Eoghan."

"Naw you're not."

"You can't stop me. I tol' her I'm in, and I'm going," I say, standing up and throwing the strap of my kitbag over my shoulder.

"Fianna, ye can't just leave to fight those dickheads," he stands up.

"I'm away," I say firmly, walking out the door.

"Get your arse back here, now!"

"You're not my da, Eoghan. You can't make me stay."

"I might not be your da, but I'm the closest thing to a father you've had these past years. You better treat me with a bit more respect."

"Maybe," I shrug, "But I'll stick with this for now," I say, throwing up my middle finger before leaving the bar. The taxi I called beforehand pulled up and I got in.

"The airport," I tell the driver.

"Right," is the simple reply he gives me.

I get a text when we're about halfway to the airport.

I click my phone off and look out the window at the familiar city I've grown up in. All my life except a year was spent here. When I wasn't here I was with the twins, me becoming who I am, them becoming who they are... or were, and then I left them. Not by choice. Not on purpose. But I still left them.

But now I've got Wanda back, and while I don't know how long I'll be with her for, it will be good to see her. If only I could've seen him one last time before I left, spoke to him one last time, made sure nothing was left unsaid. Instead I'm here, he's gone, and I'll never know how things could've gone if perhaps I never left.

The driver stops at the airport entrance and lets me out, I pay him the fare and he takes it with a smile. I grab my bag, close the door, and go into the airport. I go to the desk and ask if there are any last-minute tickets to Leipzig-Altenburg I could get on. While there was a seat I could take, it cost a little more than a pretty penny. Luckily I had enough to buy it and went through security immediately. I opted for a pat-down rather than the metal detector and thanks to my damn good hiding spots the woman didn't find my brass knuckles.

I wait for the half hour before my flight and board along with the others. I get to my seat and sigh. A two-hour flight isn't long, it's just boring to sit through, no one to talk to and not long enough to sleep through. I just sit there messing on my phone for a bit, making faces at the baby looking through the gap between the chairs a couple rows in front of me.

When the plane finally lands I prepare myself. This is it. I have to fight Avengers. I have to fight deadly psycho assassins. But first. I have to see Wanda. For the first time in two years. For the first time since he died.

° ∆ -------- ••• ------- ∆ ° ∆ -------- ••• ------- ∆ °

When I leave the airport I scan my surroundings and all the cars parked there. I stop when I come across a van that could be owned by no other, a white panel van with what I'd consider an iconic license plate: L: T34MC4P, I know that it's gotta be my ride. I go to the passenger side and knock on the window, the door opens, and I'm promptly enveloped in a hug.

"Someone order a conriocht?" I sat into my sister's shoulder.

(Werewolf)

She laughs and hugs me tighter, "I did, you little volk."

(Wolf)

I look at her with tears in my eyes, smiling sadly. She looks back at me with a similar expression and we just stay there in the embrace for a moment.

"Okay," I say, finally pulling away and wiping my tears away, "So who's ass do I have to kick?"

She laughs, wiping away her own tears, "No one's just yet. We gotta get there first, so get in the back."

"Back of a van?" I quirk an eyebrow, "Are there seats of does this look like a kidnapping?"

"There are seats, but they're laid down. Scott is sleeping on them, and I thought you'd want to stretch before we get there, human or not."

"That's fair, but the second I shift I'm gonna be stuck with Lu, you know that."

"I can get her to ease up, but you're stuck with her, you have to learn how to get along with her, okay?"

"Yes mom," I mock, "I'll see you on the other side."

I salute her before opening the back door, seeing a middle-aged man sleeping on the seats. Must be Scott. I climb behind the seats and lay down, shifting to the Mactíre, and as expected I hear Lu.

Lu is like a voice in my head, she's the canine and lupine instincts that got transferred during the experiments. She talks to me, mostly degrades me for my logic and emotions, planning things out rather than acting on instinct and figuring it out on the fly.

"So, she returns," Lu mocks.

"Yes, I've returned. Wanda needs help, she needs me, needs us to work together," I reply.

"Wanda? Wanda needs us?"

"Yes. And we're gonna work together. Right?"

"Yes. Of course. Anything for Wanda."

"Good. Now we're gonna be driving for a bit, so what do you suggest we do?"

"Sleep. Sleep is good. Sleep builds energy."

"Okay Lu, we'll sleep. But when we're fighting I need to take control, okay? I need to be able to focus."

"Okay Fi, you take control."

"Thank you."

And with that I begin to drift out of consciousness.

[my-arlington-academia]

The main 10 cheering up a crying Scholar (Y/N) finally part 2!

Here are Neha, Raquel and Tadashi! I had to cut the last 5 in 2 posts because tumblr doesn't allow more than 250 blocks of text... But anyway! I finally did it! It's been 84 years... though I feel like those are not really headcanons anymore. They're all so long that it would be more accurate to say that they're scenarios. Sorry! It's probably gonna be really annoying scrolling up and down.

Neha

- crying is a really good way to let your emotions out and it always worked out for you

- whenever it's all too much you make yourself cry to feel better afterward

- one day, once you finished crying your phone rang

- it's from Neha, she's inviting you to her room

- oh boy.

- when you moved into the dorms Karolina did say that the previous owner of the room would put loud music on and they would hear it

- 'did Neha hear me cry?' God you hope not

- When you knock, the door immediately opens as if Neha was right in front of it waiting for you

- She pulls you in and starts taking your measurements

- "I've decided to use you as my model for my next outfit."

- "W-what?!?"

- now you're almost sure that she did hear you, or else why would she make an outfit just for you when she's got Karolina?

- surprisingly a few days later the outfit is done! Does it really take that little time usually? You're pretty sure that Neha already had the design ready in her sketchbook

- during that time though, everyday until the "outfit" was ready she would go out of her way to talk to you everyday even though she's usually either busy or with Karolina

- she knows that it annoys her but even when Karolina was around Neha would still come and chat with you for a bit

- You're guessing that she didn't want you to feel like you're alone in your hard times

- when the outfit was done she called you over again

- "Here, try it on!"

- there's more excitement in her voice than usual and it's really freaking cute

- "You mean right here, right now?"

- she keeps staring at you in silence before coming back to her senses

- "Oh, right. Sorry. I'll turn away while you change."

- but then while you're taking your clothes off the door flows open

- "Neha, did you see my-"

- Karolina looks at the both of you and while she's trying to process the scene all that she gets from the situation is: you taking your clothes off in their room, and Neha waiting for you to take them off while facing away?

- "N... Nevermind. Just do your thing I'll come back in one hour. Or uh, two hours. Actually."

- She closed the door in a hurry. Welp. She probably misunderstood.

- Neha kept on facing the wall but you could see her ears getting red

- that little accident is quickly forgotten when you've put the outfit on

- it's so elaborate and classy. it's making you feel self-concious

- Even though Neha was the one who made the outfit she blushed when she saw you in it

- "You look so lovely- uh. I mean the dress! The dress looks lovely on you, obviously, since I'm the one who made it."

- her bashfulness is making you blush too but you tell her that you can't pay for it

- "Are you kidding? It's a gift I've made for you. No one else in the world owns this and won't own it because I won't put it on sale. It's a special outfit only for you."

- She takes her sketchbook and rips out a page, it's a sketch of the outfit and... you're the one wearing it on the drawing!

- "To be honest, I had already heard you crying a few times in your room and I didn't know how to help. So uh... I guess what I mean is. I've been planning this for a long time but I wasn't brave enough to ask for your measurements until recently and um..."

- She's rambling and rambling, you've probably never heard her talk this much

- "Basically... when you're sad come over. Or ask me to come over, whatever. Our rooms are right next to eachother so whether you cry in your room or here I'll hear you anyway so you might as well be with me."

- this was maybe not the best way to phrase it, but you got the feeling she was going for and that's all that matters

Raquel

- Noticed that you weren't feeling good right away

- but more in a "are you catching a cold?" kinda way

- but it didn't have anything to do with your health

- You actually wanted to explain what happend as soon as it did but when you tried to, tears came down immediately from the very first sentence

- Raquel grabbed you by the shoulders

- "It's okay! You can tell me later if it's too hard."

- The next day when you were getting ready to go to school Raquel came to your room dressed in casual clothes

- "Hey Y/N! Let's skip today."

- You tell her that you can't because you're a scholarship student and all but she ends up convincing you anyway

- "It's all fine, it's just for one day! Everyone thinks that you're a really hard-working, punctual and honest person! They'll believe whatever you say."

- "Raquel... I am a hard-working, punctual and honest person..."

- "Exactly! And that's why you can take advantage of that and no one will doubt you."

- Oh well...

- it's not like you were looking forward to that math test anyway

- you sneak around and get out of the school through Raquel's knowledge of... blind spots?

- you feel a little guilty about it since you'll have to lie to the teachers later about "not feeling well"

- Raquel makes you forget that pretty easily though

- "Okayyy! Now let's go have our breakfast, I know a place."

- "Ah, cool."

- "You don't sound really excited... But you know, the both of us sneaking out of school to go on a date: isn't it a little bit like we're secretly lovers during war time between two kingdoms in a movie?"

- Wait, this was a date?? You had no idea

- You spent the whole day just walking around town in different fast foods, parks, and shops

- everytime you wanted to buy something Raquel would try to buy it for you

- You refused everything except the food, she was being extremely pushy about paying for the food

- on the way back you decide to tell her about your troubles again, this time hopefully you won't burst into tears

- She's incredibly understanding and doesn't let you downplay your feelings

- anytime you say "it may sound stupid"/"maybe I'm being too emotional" she's like

- "No! Fuck that! There's a reason why you feel this way and it's not dumb."

- You get a little bit teary eyed and before you can even think about crying Raquel hugs you

- then she whispers in your ear

- "Did it hurt?"

- "Uh... what?"

- At first you thought she meant your feelings because obviously it did hurt, you just spent like 20 minutes explaining what had happened

- but then you understood

- is she seriously trying to cheer you up with pick-up lines?

- "So did it hurt or did it not?"

- "You mean, when I fell from heaven?"

- She makes the biggest grin before replying

- "No, when you fell for me."

- You're trying your best not to burst into laughter

- "Nah, not really. It was a quick fall."

- Oh no, you outsmarted her lame pick-up line

- you guys end the day with the most stupid pick-up line fight

- little do you know that Raquel will shoot a ball in the face of a certain someone for hurting you

- maybe multiple times if she feels like it

Tadashi

- To be honest he didn't really notice at first

- maybe it was one of your "bad days", Tadashi knows what it's like so he totally gets it

- but then when it's been 3 days in a row and you're still in that state?

- he cancels all of his work and assignements for the day

- calls you over in such a professional manner that it's kinda scary

- he literally asks you to meet him in the student council's room

- tells you to "please sit down" in front of him

- Honestly, this situation is making you really tense. Did Tadashi figure out that one time, 3 months ago, when you stole a smoothie from the cafeteria?

- "Look, I'm sorry okay? I was just really thirsty and I needed sugar. Also, it's not like I wasn't allowed to get one! There was no one at the counter so I figured it wouldn't hurt to..."

- Tadashi IAmConfusion™ looks at you

- "Why are you talking about that now? Don't worry, I know."

- Now it's your turn to get confused

- "You mean... you knew and you didn't give me detention?"

- Now he looks a bit frustrated

- "Come on Y/N, I'm not that mean. I won't give you detention just because you came 5 minutes late to our meeting."

- This is most likely a misunderstanding...

- "This is what you were talking about just now, right? That the reason why you came here late is because you were drinking a smoothie. I figured you were probably busy doing something so no need to feel so guilty about it."

- "Oh. Oooohhh... yeahh... totally. Sorry."

- Now that this is out of the way, he asks you to tell him what's on your mind

- At first you hesitate a little but, if there's someone with whom you want to share this with, it's Tadashi

- he's listening really closely to what you're saying without cutting you off but sometimes you can see his eyes getting a bit darker

- Like, you're not being specific enough about a detail or something and he's probably taking notes of all the questions he has so that he can ask them when you're done

- At some point though, you become really emotional and your voice starts cracking when you're talking

- You end up crying and your tears fall on the desk

- Tadashi jumps out of his seat, his chair falls down as he panics

- "Hey! Y/N?? Err... Um..."

- Takes you in his arms carefully, like he's not really sure if that's what he's supposed to do when this type of thing happens

- "It's okay! I'm here... I'm here so... d-don't cry Y/N I'll do something about it no problem!"

- when you've calmed down he puts down his wallet on the desk

- "Uh... what?"

- "You can use it."

- "You mean your money??"

- "What else?"

- he explains that you can take all the smoothies and premium food in the cafeteria with this

- "Are you kidding? I can't use your money for that."

- He's literally trying to cheer you up with money which is obviously not the way to go about it

- He sees that you're not convinced so he pulls out his phone and shoves the screen on your face so closely that you have to take a step back in order to read what's on it

- It's Tadashi's to do list, probably the place where he writes all of his tasks for the week

- The spot on number one is you. It reads "1. Y/N"

- when you look at him Tadashi is furiously blushing and looking away

- this is incredibly sweet until you notice how wrong this sounds

- "Wait... Tadashi?"

- "Yes?"

- "I'm first on your... "To do" list? Seriously?"

- "What's that's supposed to mean? Of course you're number one on my- Oh god..."

- he just understood how wrong it sounded and took the phone back before rewriting the list

- He's making it so easy for you to tease him

- the poor boy is literally begging you to stop it but you can't until he shows you his phone screen again

- this time it's written "1. Make Y/N smile again", you're literally his number one priority. This is so sweet to the point where you can't tease him anymore. It would be too mean.

- As for Tadashi, let's just say that he's about to get "really mean" with the person you were talking about just now and he's not going to hold back

[joongie-teez]

A Crushed Crush </3 01

Pairing: Jimin x reader

Genre: fluff, angst, college!au 

Warnings: Jungkook is being a little dirty minded

Word count: 1,9k

Summary: Prepare yourself to be crushed because of a little innocent crush

Park Jimin.

The well known ‘angel’ of the school. Everyone knew him, everyone adored him. And most importantly of all, everyone had a crush on him, even most of the guys. You were no exception to that. He was popular, extroverted and had a huge fanbase for he could sing and dance. He always sat in the front of the class, always got A grades and everyone wanted him in their club. 

Then there was you, a shy little potato without any friends in your class. You always sat in de back of the classroom and nobody really knew you. You were a loner, an einzelgänger. So why, did you develop a crush for Park Jimin of all people? Was it because of his charming looks and his cute giggles? Or because he was always nice to everyone? You truly didn’t understand why, the only thing you knew for sure is that you wouldn’t stand a chance with him. 

So you decided to admire him from afar, never talked to him, never made eye contact. And most importantly of all, never crossed his way. Social interaction was already hard enough, but social interaction with Jimin seemed almost impossible.

After school, you would work in a cute little coffee shop with your two only friends, Yoongi and Jin. Jin was the owner of the shop and Yoongi was his old friend. The three of you immediately hit off. Jin being the loud and energetic mom-type, Yoongi the quiet but sassy type and you being the shy and awkward type. They are the only two people in the whole world who knew about your little crush on a guy from your school. You never even told your own parents about it And you were never planning on letting anyone else knew about your little secret.

<\3 <\3 <\3

Today was just a normal day. 

It started out with your English and math class with Jimin and his two friends Taehyung and Jungkook. These two are following Jimin around like little puppies. Everywhere Jimin goes, these two go, it’s cute honestly. Well, it was cute if those two didn’t look like two sex gods but instead two nerdy guys. It’s no wonder those also got their own fanbase, alongside Jimin. And let me tell you, these fans were crazy. Not the cute jealous girlfriend crazy, no, the straight-up Yandere crazy.

A year ago, there was a new girl in school who got shown around by Jimin. She got a little to close to him physically and, well, let’s just say that no one ever heard of her again.

After school you went to your work, excited to see Yoongi and Jin again. Because you weren’t good with socializing, and Jin knew this, but you were good at baking, Jin let you work at the back instead of behind the counter. 

Walking inside, you were immediately hit with the smell of fresh coffee and apple pie. The cute little coffee shop had a soft feeling, the walls being coated with a soft baby pink colour. Jin had made sure to get the most comfortable couches and chairs for his customers and honestly, you sometimes just wanted to take one home. 

“Oh (Y/N)! You’re finally here!”

Jin shouted as soon as he saw you walk in. He walked out of the back, holding a spatula in his hand. He was wearing his cute soft pink apron, which was now coated with flower and strawberry jam.

“Jinniee! I missed you!”

Lucky for you the café was pretty quiet at this time of the day and you didn’t have to feel self-conscious about anything you said. You went in for a hug but stopped at the last second, looking at the huge red spot of strawberry jam on his apron. 

“Aww why did you stop (Y/N)-ie?”

“I’m wearing my good clothes, I won’t let you ruin them.”

Jin looked at you with a faked hurt look on his face.

“You would choose your clothes above your friends? Yahhh that hurts.”

You looked at his face preparing a comeback, but bursted out laughing now you’ve gotten a better look at his face. Its seems like the flower didn’t only end up on his apron.

“HAHAHA, Jin you have a little something there.”

“What where?!”

<\3 <\3 <\3

In the back where you were planning to try out this new receipt you found online you were about to grab your own cute little apron when Jin called out once more.

“Ah Y/N! I need you to take the orders today, Yoongi is sick and I don’t have anyone else available.”

“B-but Jin, you know I don’t do well with talking!”

“I know and I’m sorry, but please (Y/N)?”

He asked you with his big puppy eyes, silently begging you to agree to his request. You were a sucker for cute puppy eyes and Jin knew it. You stared intimately at each other for a hot minute. You are not going to give, you not giving in. Goddammit it’s too cute.

“Alright, but just this once!” You said while pouting. Inside your head, a mental breakdown started forming. You used to have panic attacks in situations like this, but luckily for you, you’ve gotten help with that. That didn’t mean you were happy about this, though. 

“Thank you so much, I own you one!”

And just like that this normal day, turned into a disaster. You messed up orders, said ‘good morning’ when you should have said ‘thank you’ and sometimes forgot how to speak altogether.

But you knew you should’ve never left the house this morning the moment that Jimin and his friends walked into the store and towards the counter. 

The door of the little café opened at the little bell rang through the store, signaling that someone has come inside. You looked up from the coffee machine to look at the new customer. Walking towards the counter you were behind, was Park Jimin with his two friends, Jeon Jungkook and Kim Taehyung. 

You almost dropped the cup you were holding.

Jimin looked like an absolute god, wearing his ripped jeans, white shirt and with his black beanie on top of his black hair. His stylish sunglasses covering his eyes he scanned the counter, noticing someone was standing there and began his stride towards you. You looked around, hoping to find one of your colleagues to take over, but sadly luck wasn’t on your side today. You slowly made your way over to the counter, wondering if your clothes looked presentable and if your hair wasn’t too messy after a long day. By the time you finally arrived there, Jimin was already waiting for you. 

“Uhm..hi...what would you…uhm….like?” You whispered in a small voice, not daring to make eye contact with anything else than your hands.

“Hi, I guess. Anyways, I would like the Americano. Kook, Tae what would you guys like?”

“I would like a taste of that girl.” Jungkook said while bursting out in laughter. 

What did he just say?

While the three guys in front of you were laughing about the little joke Jungkook made, you stood there in shock, not knowing what to reply or if you were to even reply at all.

“Ahhh, Kookie I think you broke the little girl.”

“Guys, don’t be mean. Just add a green tea and a cappuccino with my order, thank you.”

You slightly nodded, while still looking at Jimin with wide eyes open in shock. Snapping out of your trance after Jimin raised an eyebrow you wrote down the rest of the order and let them pay. They walked away to the corner of the store while talking excitedly about their day. You looked after them with longing eyes, only to be shocked out of your trance when Jin called you to help out with an order.

The rest of the day went pretty smoothly after that absolute humiliation interaction. At least you didn’t mess up any orders anymore. By the end of the day, you and Jin locked the store and began your walk home. 

“Soooo…. Jimin is the mysterious guy, huh?”

“I don’t understand what you’re getting at.”

“Aw, come on (Y/N), it was pretty obvious that you’re into him.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

.

.

.

.

“Was it really that obvious?”

“HAHAHA, I knew it!”

“Ugh shut up.”

“Awh, is little (Y/N) embarrassed? (Y/N) and Jimin sitting in a tree-“

“I SAID SHUT UP!”

<\3 <\3 <\3

The next day you woke up with really big bags under your eyes because you’ve been up till 2 am having fun with friends. Well, read about people who were having fun with their friends. You slowly got out of bed, so you wouldn't get dizzy, and walked towards the bathroom to start your morning routine. Looking in the mirror, you let out a big sigh. 

“Allright yesterday was horrible, but today is another day! It’s going to be a beautiful day and everything is going to be just fine. It’ll be a normal day where no one will notice me, just how I like it!”

You spoke to yourself in the mirror. After a bad day, it always helped to encourage yourself to take a step outside the house the next morning. 

It was going to get really cold today so you decided to put on one of the thickest and comfiest sweaters you got and some high waisted pants. After brushing your hair you decided to just wear it down, being too lazy to even try to get it to look good. You walked towards your closet to look at your beanie collection. Eventually, you decide to go with a beanie with cat ears and a cute little cat face on the front. 

Walking downstairs, your little kitty greeted you at the bottom, probably in need of new food and water. After taking care of your baby, you decide to just grab a cracker and head towards school, already being a little late.

<\3 <\3 <\3

Forget all that talk about today being a good day.

You’ve gotten halfway through the day, without having any trouble. But of course, the universe decided to play you. History was the last class of the day, and of course the class that’s all about the group projects. You hated group work, especially in pairs cause then you would have to say things to each other. Nobody wanted group works with you anyways, all they’ll say is ‘are you new here’ and ‘why are you so quiet’.  They never were quiet tho, you could always hear them talking badly of you afterward to their friends. But what you hated even more, was the next sentence the teacher spoke.

“The next pair will be….. (L/N) (Y/N) and Park Jimin.”

Oh fuck.

[chillin-at-partys-bar]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme

fill out & repost ♥  This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is: canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless

Is your character popular in the fandom? YES / NO (Though he’s only in a few panels, I think he ends up being many people’s first fave?)

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom? YES / NO 

Is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO

Are they underrated? YES / NO (I think he’s very nicely rated, but also parts of him need more attention)

Were they relevant for the main story? YES / NO

Were they relevant for the main character? YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world? YES / NO

How’s their reputation? GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL 

How strictly do you follow canon?

I try to follow what is known at the moment. I’ve done math to figure out when people would be joining his crew, and I try to stick as close to canon as I can. However, we don’t know a lot about him or his crew honestly, so I end up supplementing a lot of my own things. I do have an intense, crippling fear of being wrong so I try to only make safe headcanon guesses even though I know most people won’t care. Also, I'm not a huge fan of no women seen so far on his ship so I just... adjust some things and stick my OCs there. I have a feeling I know part of why there aren’t any women, and I don’t like it even if it fits in with sailor and pirate lore, so I’m just gonna fix that bit. Shanks is so decent otherwise. 

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.

Shanks has a lot of different parts to him. He’s great because he can get along with most everyone for an evening of drinking. He doesn’t care who you are, and he’s really hard to upset but he can definitely troll other characters very well. He’s kind and will rescue your character from certain death if need be, but he’s also strong and will challenge them if they threaten those he loves. He can be a really fun character to ship with as he loves very hard and people mean a lot to him. So if someone writes with him he is guaranteed to have strong thoughts on yours and will be more than likely to call them a friend by the end of the day. He’s also very attractive and good with kids, so that’s nice. He’s very much a pirate too, so if you want a pirate for your story but you don’t want the kind that will strike you down, he’s a great option. He’s forgiving too so you can screw him over and he’ll find a way to forgive you. Maybe. Depends on the kind of screw up. He’s also got a long range in terms of moments to play in his life, some really dramatic canon moments and some headcanoned ones. So it’s very possible to write with kid, teen, young adult, and adult Shanks. 

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?

It can be a bit difficult to create conflict with Shanks. Although it lets him pull off some great crack moments and have some great fun chaos, it also means that even powerful antagonists are hesitant to challenge him or fight him. Or even bring harm to him as canonically it means starting a fight with the Red Hair Pirates - which it’s also canon that not many are eager to do. This means a lot of the threads end up being talking or verbal threats as the opponent may make threats or Shanks will threaten but he doesn’t feel action is warranted unless action is done against him or a friend (if that makes sense). And even then circumstances mean a lot. I’d love to be able to play more physical rps and put him in more harrowing positions, but it’s difficult with how powerful he is and his reputation. 

What inspired you to rp your muse?

I actually really, really like pirates. I have some books on pirates and I’m really drawn to stories about pirates. A long, long, long time ago I had just read a cheesy romance novel called To Catch a Pirate and I really wanted another book where the pirates weren’t necessarily the bad guys. I was volunteering my summers at the library at the time and they had the first volume of One Piece. I set my sights on Shanks and never looked back. He’s just everything I crave in a pirate story. The dashing rogue with a heart of gold, you know. So I was sold. 

What keeps your inspiration going?

I think just the character and the new interactions that we get to come up with. Also, he’s a really unique character to rp culture as well. He’s insanely powerful, which is something that is more frowned upon with creating OCs for better or worse. Also, because he really won’t abuse this power except for like, something silly, I get to really play with him. I feel I also get to help people play with versions of their characters they haven’t been able to play before. Characters who are used to strong-arming and violence to get their way suddenly can’t do that, because Shanks is too powerful. So they have to come up with another way to express themselves and seeing these muns work with their characters to figure that out is really fun. 

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you do your character justice? YES / NO

Do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO

Do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO

Do you think a lot about your muse during the day? YES / NO

Are you confident in your portrayal? YES / NO

Are you confident in your writing? YES / NO

Are you a sensitive person? YES / NO

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?

I’m going to be honest. I really need to steel myself for criticism. I’m a perfectionist to the point where it’s really, really bad sometimes and I have walked away from a character because one person said they didn’t like how I played them. I try to go back to that character but I just can’t really. RP is fun for me, and I want this world to be a place where I can feel free to do what I want. So I prefer no feedback here. 

In before someone says “but criticism is how you grow” - okay. I get that. I really do. I’m a graduate student so I’ve had feedback from teachers. I have a few writing groups where I get feedback on my creative work. I get feedback on things that are meant for a larger audience and I get the feedback often. It hurts a bit but I am getting tougher. A few weeks ago, my group ripped apart (in the nicest way possible) a comedy sketch I was proud of. It took a bit to get over but now it’s better than before. 

So here I might not open things up for critique. I don’t really want to hear it (I accept positivity because I’m a jackass like that). If you don’t like how I write Shanks, that’s fine. Please don’t tell me and leave me be and let me do this my way. If you want to critique something of mine, let me know and I’ll give you a short story, some character notes for a book, one of my sketches, my sitcom pilot script, or my full-length movie treatment, hell I have a 2500-3500 word reflection essay for my grad program due next week so read that. Those- feedback, yes please. I need them to be stellar. This? No. Shanks is my toy and I’m here for fun not to worry and stress and get anxious about posting.

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?

I accept questions! I also accept questions asking about my decisions. Those I don’t view as criticism and working through my thought process can be helpful. Some answers might not be as complete as others but I definitely do accept them!

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?

Not really. I don’t even want to know they disagree unless it’s a huge problem. I had a disagreement over a headcanon once get super out of control and the person got angry with me so... I really don’t want to know. Unless it’s something significant I guess? But I can’t think of anything that would be of that magnitude. I just want to have a good time. Please just let me have fun my way and if you really hate it, just write Shanks yourself and let me be. 

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?

I don’t want to know. This is the theme here. Just don’t tell me. I don’t see the point in telling me you don’t like how I write. I am very sensitive sometimes and I’m working hard through therapy and my own work to not be so sensitive, but I’m just not prepared for that sort of feedback here. In my writing groups, yes - definitely prepared for disagreement and push back on decisions. Here? No. Please no. If you hate my version of the character that much, please just block me. Or just vanish into the abyss. Don’t tell me. I will try to avoid being sad about it but I will not be successful. I know it’s not great and I really don’t want people to try and tell me to get over things like this because I know I need to and I’m working on it but gyah. Now I’m upsetting myself, haha. i cry easily guys. 

Some people: i don’t care if the truth hurts. I’d choose the truth over a lie any day. 

Me: no just fucking lie to me if you have to tell me something. let me be ignorant here.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?

I’m sure some people hate Shanks. And that’s different from hating my portrayal. He’s not my character, so whatever you want to do go ahead and hate. I don’t like a bunch of other characters in the world. Just remember whenever shitting on a character, and this is something I learned while interning at Marvel this last year: every character is someone’s favorite. So in Marvel that meant you had to treat every character with respect. Even if it’s like, Electro in Spider-Man - he’s someone’s favorite character so treat him with respect. That doesn’t mean let him get his way, just don’t treat him like junk or a filler. 

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?

See above with “trouble making mistakes.” Also, but why?

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?

Wow, this whole thing makes me look difficult - doesn’t it? I’m really just here for fun and to enjoy myself and have a good time writing. I do think I’m pretty laid back about things, I don’t have triggers and I’m really forgiving about mistakes. If someone needs to talk to me about something technical that’s fine and I love hearing ideas. I just also want to keep this as a place for fun, you know? I want to make sure I’m not afraid to come on here and write some things, so I just try to make it a space for me to be comfortable. 

That’s about it, congrats for filling out!

➸  Tagger: @godlivesonthemoon and @seraphiixa ((thank you guys so much!!))

➸ Tagging: u and ur face

[hairringtonsteve]

biology notes (1).

Welcome to the Four Horsemen collab fic! Each of us will be writing and posting parts of this story, but you never know who is going to post the next part, so keep your eyes peeled on all of our blogs!

Dot: @stevesdacre

Emma: @hairringtonsteve

Lidi: @letmeletmetrashyourlove

Rachael: @dacrethehalls

PART ONE (this one!)

PART TWO (tba)

PART THREE (tba)

PART FOUR (tba)

billy hargrove x reader & steve harrington x reader 

fic summary: the reader is the new girl at hawkins, and let’s just say that she ends up catching the eye of a few boys in school. 

word count: 1, 773

a/n: so, surprise! this is going to be an interesting fic, because we’ve all agreed that no one actually knows what’s going to happen. the only person that’s read this is @stevesdacre because she edited it. lidi and rachael have no idea what’s going to happen, and only the person writing it controls what happens next. so i’ve got no idea what’s going to happen from here on out! be sure to follow everyone else because it’s a surprise as to who’s going to post next - and honestly i’m the worst at remembering this stuff. rachael and lidi have harassed me like 20 times bc i keep asking questions.

“There’s nothing to worry about. Everything’s going to be the exact same.”

Mom kept saying that over and over again as we packed up the car and drove from Antioch, California to our new home in Hawkins. It had been three days of reassurances that everything would be fine, that Christmas would be the same, and that nothing would change. Which was fine and dandy, except for the fact that I was stuck with explaining to Matty that yes, Santa would find us despite us moving so close to Christmas, and no, he wouldn’t get coal for whispering fuck as we pulled away from the only home we’d ever known.

I was also stuck with the honor of getting Matty ready for school, which meant waking up a half hour early and rooting through the closet for something that would suffice for the freezing temperatures of Hawkins.

I ended up having to feed the kid breakfast too, which had been an issue all on its own. The worst, though, was getting this kid ready for the bus.

“Do you think Dad will be here soon?” Matty asked me, looking up at me with his big, brown eyes. I held out his coat and motioned for him to shove his arms through. Neither of our coats were very thick, but they did the trick for the most part.

“Mom said he just needed to finish up at work, remember?” My stomach twisted at the sidestepping, but Matty didn’t know about the heated, whispered conversations at two in the morning, or how Dad hadn’t actually slept in the house for two weeks. “Everything’s going to the same, trust me.”

I was going to throw up.

“You’re sure that Santa will find us, right? Did you send him the new address?” 

“Of course I did. I’m not stupid. One of the elves called last night and said we didn’t even have to do that. They keep tabs on all the first graders.”

“That makes sense,” he said with a shrug. I bit back my grin as I nodded towards the front door.

“Let’s go, little man. We’ve got school.” The rumble of the school bus could be heard as it approached, coughing and gurgling as the driver eased on the brakes. Matty practically launched himself away from me, backpack hanging off of one shoulder as he jumped down the steps. “Have a good day!” I yelled, laughing as he waved haphazardly over his shoulder. The little shit didn’t even look at me.

“Matty get off to school?” Mom’s voice was rough. It was hard to tell if was due to lack of sleep, or the soft sobs I’d heard early into the morning. Odds are, it was both.

“Yeah, he did.” I slid my jacket on, reaching down for my backpack, careful not to look at her. I could handle a lot of things on my first day of school, but I couldn’t handle Mom breaking. Not then. “I’ll see you after school, okay? 

“Okay,” she said. Her voice was softer that time. I gave in, and my chest squeezed. Her eyes were red and puffy, her hands shaking a little as she stood there in her robe. I felt frozen, like I was facing down my future in that entryway.

“I love you, Mom.”

“I love you too, baby.” She wasn’t looking me in the eye, instead focusing on the fascinating vomit-colored shag carpeting. For a brief moment of insanity, I wondered if it was some weird omen.

It was awkward, the two of us just standing there. Neither one of us moved, but after a handful of seconds, I gave her a half wave and bolted out the door. The wind has a sharp chill to it, and I tugged my jacket closer to my body. It wasn’t a long walk to the high school, but snot was practically dripping out of my nose the entire way there, which made it feel like hours.

It shouldn’t have been surprising that the rest of the morning continued to suck. But small town school were supposed to be filled with nice people, right? Hawkins had apparently missed that memo. Every teacher seemed to be scowling, and the students were clustered together, occasionally offering me curious looks.

By the time biology rolled around, I felt like I was ten seconds away from crying. Lunch had been horrendous. I’d somehow managed to forget my money, and the guy with the nice hair behind me had ended up paying for it. Probably because I’d started stuttering and was holding up the line. 

Biology felt like my breaking point, though. I stepped into the classroom, and twenty-four pairs of eyes turned to focus on me.

“Class, this is Y/N. She’s from - where is it?”

“California. Antioch,” I clarified, ignoring how my voice shook. The last thing I wanted was for a bunch of hormonal teenagers to gawk as I burst into tears. The teacher - her name was Mrs. Dowd, or something - was staring at me, like she expected me to elaborate. Two painstakingly long moments passed before she sighed.

“Take a seat, then. Next to…  Mr. Hargrove.” She nodded her head towards a boy in the back, clad in an unbuttoned red shirt and a rather unsightly mullet. “Mr. Hargrove,” she snapped, his head snapping up from whatever he’d been engrossed with. His gaze flickered over me, slow and confident, taking his time. Something in my chest twisted, but it wasn’t like earlier. It wasn’t that sick-to-my-stomach, going to vomit feeling. This was different, an improvement.

It felt like walking down death row, in a way. The students still stared, but now girls were whispering as I stepped passed them. Mullet-Boy was still watching me. I gripped my notebook and pencil a little tighter in my arms as I made my way to the back of the room. Sliding onto the stool, I set my stuff down and leaned my elbows against the top.

“You’re from California?” Mullet-Boy asked, his voice quiet as Mrs. Dowd started to drone about mitochondria. Antioch High had covered that in the beginning of the school year.

“That’s what I said.” He chuckled, a low sound that sent shivers down my spine.

“Me too.” I glanced over to him, cocking a brow. “San Diego,” he continued, pointing to himself 

“Cool for you.” It wasn't that I hated being talk to during class, but Mrs. Dowd kept glancing our way, a disapproving frown gracing her features.

“I'm Billy,” he said, leaning a little towards me. He had an elbow on the table, almost touching the crappy microscope that looked to be about a hundred years old. He didn't seem to get the message. His eyes were nice, though, and his little smirk wasn't the worst thing to look at.

“Y/N,” I responded, giving in. His smirk widened 

“Nice to meet you, Y/N,” he drawled. I let out a soft hum in response, averting my eyes to the chalkboard. It didn't help, though. I could feel his gaze burning into me, begging me to look at him.

I managed to keep my eyes off of him for a whole three minutes. I would have managed longer, but the second Mrs. Dowd turned her back to the class, he was leaning too far into my personal space.

“Can you back off, man? Jesus.” i turned my head to him, noting the wide grin playing on his mouth. He was a little closer than I'd realized, but not so much that it startled me.

“I was just going to ask if you wanted to borrow my notes.” I glanced down to his notebook, and to my surprise, there were actual notes scribbled down. There weren't a lot, but there was something.

“Oh, um, thanks. I've got my notes from my old school's bio, though. And I'm pretty sure that my notes are more… comprehensive.”

“You think I could borrow your notes sometime?” There was something in his voice and how his lips curled that told me he didn't give a rat’s ass about biology notes.

“I'm sure that…” I trailed off, glancing throughout the room. Girls diverted their gazes, every single one looking away - all except for one. She held my gaze, a hint of a scowl on her face. “She'd love to let you borrow her notes,” I finished, nodding my head in her direction. Billy rolled his eyes. 

“Carol? Her notes are shit. I'd learn more about biology reading a math book than I would looking at her notes,” he said. His words made me chuckle. His eyes widened a little, his smirk leaning towards more of a grin. “You know, I think you-”

“Mr. Hargrove, are you planning on talking to Miss. Y/L/N for the entire duration of the class?” 

“Just letting her see my notes, ma'am. I'm trying to make her feel welcome to Hawkins.” There wasn't anything suggestive about his tone, but my stomach flipped anyways. Without meaning to, I stole a quick glance towards him. My eyes started at the top and worked their way down, stopping at the sight of his unbuttoned shirt, and what laid beneath it. My cheeks burned a bright red. I set my jaw and turned to face the chalkboard.

For the rest of the class, Billy kept quiet. I'd notice anytime he turned his head in my direction, but I wouldn't let him win.

The end of class came faster than I'd expected, and suddenly everyone was packing up their things. I slid off of the stool, letting myself glance over to Billy. He was chatting with some dark haired guy, bits and pieces of their conversation drifting over.

Apparently, they played basketball.

I slipped out of the classroom before he had a chance to say anything to me. He seemed like a flirt, but nice enough. Weirdly enough, he'd made me feel a little more at home. That cocky, annoying California asshole shtick was more comforting than anything Mom had said over the last couple of days. 

I must have been too caught up in my thoughts because the next thing I knew, my shoulder was colliding into someone else’s, and papers went flying everywhere.

“Oh God, I am so sorry!” I burst out, kneeling down to pick up the scattered notes.

“Oh, it's fine. No worries,” the voice said. I looked up, eyes widening when I realized just who it was. The hair gave it away. 

“I, uh, should have been watching where I was going.”

“Like I said, no worries.” He grinned at me. “So how was your lunch?”

taglist: @alwaysmebeforeyou @istanuriss @smittyjaws @myblackwings5 @morgandakotaq @rivedale @laterg8r @buckybass @airforcecollins @superanonymousreader @ambeazyyy @harringtonhuddle @nicospaten @selenedarkbloom @samuel-maurice455 @lilo-1398 @thevortexclubposse @laurennicole1313 @inspiredbynewt

striked out names are the ones that tumblr wouldn’t let me tag!!

[sterekloving]

A small collection of high school aus! There’s so many wonderful ones out there that has yet to be read!

And Then There Is No Mystery Left (Baby, I’m Sweet On You) -  Swing Set in December - 1k - Teen

Stiles has no idea why Derek is sitting at his lunch table.

As Good As The Real Thing - literaryoblivion - 5k - Mature

He’s maybe had a crush on Stiles for going on two years now, but there’s no way he’s ever going to act on it or say anything. But, he's memorized all of Stiles's quirks and habits because he and Stiles have been in the same history class for two years now, and he always ends up sitting by him. However, he and Stiles have had limited interaction with one another, which is fine. Derek can subside on his daydreams of Stiles. He can live the rest of his high school career on his fantasies alone.

That is until their teacher assigns them to be partners for a project.

Awful, Wonderful You -  stilinskisparkles - 16k - Mature

Truth be told, Derek was suffering from the mild delusion he lived in all summer wherein he actually thought this year might be different, and he might, perhaps, be able to bury the hatchet with Stiles and start over.

The superglue that’s destroyed a ninety dollar pair of pants, however, says otherwise. Derek knows how this play goes down; eventually, he’s going to have to climb out of the pants and trudge back to his dorm half naked. Stiles will gloat for a damn week; Derek will have to put up with constant remarks about Stiles getting him out of his pants... Dammit, he’s actually going to get Derek out of his pants, and it’s not even close to the way he pictured it happening.

Betting On Forever -  mrstotten, veritas_st - 17k - Mature

It’s not like Stiles spends a huge amount of time thinking about it. But when he does it seems strange, good strange, but strange nevertheless, he cant really put a finger on when they decided to become civil to each other let alone friends, best friends even.

Him...and Derek Hale. Can you imagine it?

Binomial Coefficients - DevilDoll - 20k - Teen

In which brainy freshman Stiles Stilinski wants star quarterback Derek Hale to join the math team, AKA math nerds in love.

But Then What... -  Stoney - 24k - Explicit

Senior year is almost over, and all Stiles needs to do is keep his head down to survive. A teacher calls in a favor, leaving him stuck tutoring Derek Hale, one of the most popular jocks in school and a member of a group of douchecanoes who have bullied Stiles for years. He's someone Stiles totally hates. Totally. Like, doesn't like him even a little bit. DEFINITELY isn't attracted to him.

Except that is a total lie. Fuck his life, seriously.

C’mon Now Sugar - teamfreewolf - 39k - Teen

A Teen Wolf/Veronica Mars fusion AU. Stiles helps his father out with his private investigation agency while trying to survive high school. But when murders that might be connected to the death of his best friend Laura start occurring, he is forced to team up with her brother Derek to get to the bottom of it.

Dancing (With Another Man) -  perksofbeingaiko - 35k - Mature

Derek Hale fell in love with Stiles Stilinski the moment he laid eyes on him. The boy was imperfect, vibrant, and confusing - everything Derek never knew he was missing in his life. The problem, though, is that Derek doesn't want to ruin his newly formed friendship with the boy. But with each day that passes, Derek finds that his chances start to run thin, until his world turns over completely when Stiles gets a boyfriend.

Double Date -  dragon_temeraire - 2k - Teen

Stiles scores a date for him and Derek with two of the hottest girls in school, but things don’t go quite the way he expects.

Easy Alpha - interropunct - 4k - Teen

Easy A/Teen Wolf AU. Wherein, Derek Hale is the high school hussy, Jackson and Scott really need to learn to use their inside voices. And, contrary to popular belief, everyone is still a virgin.

Help Me Get In Touch (With What I Feel) - alenie - 3k - Explicit

“Stiles, what happened?” Derek says as sternly as he can (which isn’t very). Nevertheless, there is a pause on the line, and a small sigh.

“I was just…having some Stiles personal time, you know? And…I may have gotten something stuck. Um, in me.”

“In you?” Derek says incredulously. “What do you…oh.” Enlightenment strikes. “Like, in your…”

“Yes, in my butt!” Stiles snaps.

(I Ain’t Scared Of The Fall) I Felt The Ground Before -  planiforidjit - 41k - Explicit

"You know what the solution is," she says.

"What's the solution?"

"You get a mate."

"Thank you for that, Laura. I'll file it away with the other idiotic ideas I've already tried."

Derek is sick of being treated like he's property and he's sick of his family pressuring him to find a mate. So the obvious solution is to fake a relationship with Stiles Stilinski, the annoying lacrosse player and alpha that Derek may or may not be pining over anyway.

I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me) -  bleep0bleep - 10k - Teen

Derek gets in an accident and loses a few years of his memory; suddenly everything is different— he's not a freshman loser anymore, but a popular senior, captain of the basketball team, a shoo-in for prom king, too, and he should have everything he's ever wanted— except he doesn't seem to be friends with Stiles anymore.

If You Asked Me If I Love Him, I’d Lie - dereksstilinski - 37k - Explicit

Derek has already typed the entire report out and even got all of the stuff prepared for the poster that Stiles and him will have to present. Derek found that he actually didn’t mind doing all the work when it was Stiles he was doing it for, but he wasn’t going to let Stiles get away completely. He was going to get Stiles to come over and help with the poster, so help him god.

In A Straight Line Down - standinginanicedress - 40k - Teen

“So you want to go to Prom with me just so you can get a plastic crown and a fifty dollar gift card to Outback Steakhouse.”

Stiles sets his jaw. He wants to go to prom with Derek because he wants to go to prom with Derek. But, of course, he's stubborn and prideful and can't admit to Derek how it's barely been twelve hours since they officially broke up and he's already barely handling it as it is, so he just raises his chin in the air and says, “yes.”

John Hughes Did Not Direct My Life - nascentgalaxies - 48k - Explicit

Stiles and Derek are childhood friends who drifted apart. When Stiles joins the lacrosse team against his will, the universe (with a little help from Laura and Lydia) chooses to push them back together.

Knot If You Don’t Knock - jsea, marguerite_26 - 13k - Explicit

Stiles never expects to present as an omega -- that's something that happens to people like Greenberg, not him. He is so wrong.

His life only gets stranger when Derek Hale mistakenly bursts through the door of his exam room during a doctor’s appointment. What happens next is a complicated series of events, including freshly baked cookies, book-carrying and surprise heats.

Oh God, He’s Hot - lupus - 6k - Explicit 

When Stiles came home a couple of days before junior year started from a summer away, he was a little more than excited to see his best friend Derek, especially now that he’d finally gotten the courage to act upon his long standing crush on the guy. There’s just one problem; somewhere in the span of three months puberty hit Derek like the bus hit Regina George and all of the sudden Derek is hot. And Stiles isn’t the only one who’s noticed.

Practice Makes Perfect* - blacktofade - 21k - Explicit

In his sophomore year, Stiles gets dragged to lacrosse tryouts by Scott and ends up practising alongside the senior captain, Derek Hale. Stiles just wants to live long enough to become a junior.

R.A.P.I.L.A - neko_fish - 7k -Teen

The first time Stiles talks to Derek Hale, it’s raining, it’s pouring, and Scott went and ditched him to ‘study’ with Allison.

(Thank you, best friend Scott.)

Roses are #FF000 - nashirah - 6k - Teen

“Roses are red,

Violets aren’t blue, they’re fucking purple,

This place is neat,

Let me buy you a Slurpee.”

Stiles finishes and looks pointedly at Derek. “They don’t make avocado Slurpees.”

“I’m filing for fake divorce,” Derek decides.

Seems To Me It’s Chemistry - HalfFizzbin - 4k - Teen

Awkward Nerd Derek has been crushing on Handsome Jock Stiles since forever—so getting paired with him on a Chemistry project is definitely the best/worst thing that's ever happened to him.

Soluble -  HalfFizzbin - 1k - Explicit

Derek comes back after summer break all hot, beardy and brace-less. Stiles honestly has no idea what everyone's freaking out about.

The Great Pretender - talktowater - 45k - Explicit

Stiles is the new kid at Beacon Hills High, class of 1958 and he's trying to make an impression. Derek can't figure out why this kid is so set on making such a bad one.

The John Wilkes (Kissing) Booth of Fundraising -  relenafanel - 4k - Teen

There are only a few people Stiles actually wants to kiss, but it turns out the students at Beacon Hills High School either aren't as discerning or (less likely) actually want to kiss him, because his shift at the horrible-terrible-idea kissing booth is oddly popular. 

Even Derek Hale shows up in line.

The Nerd Party - bibliosexual - 6k - Teen

Until this moment, Stiles wasn’t even sure Derek could read, and now he’s trying to steal Stiles’ obscure eight-hundred-page fantasy novel. What.

This Might Be Irony -  thepsychicclam - 38k - Mature

Stiles and Derek have been close friends since the Hale siblings moved in next door after their parents' death. But Derek's in the popular group, he's a star baseball player, and he dates popular Pep Squad captain Jennifer Blake. Stiles doesn't have any of that, just his skateboard and a hopeless crush on Derek (oh yeah, and his Vote Lydia Martin Prom Queen button). As prom and the baseball state championship grow closer, Stiles and Derek start rekindling their friendship.

And it all begins with two white boards.

Tutor!Verse - betp - 33k - Mature

They meet when Derek is seventeen and hates history almost as much as he hates his ex, Kate, and Stiles is sixteen and taking junior-level history classes.

We Are So Intimately Rearranged* - secondstar - 28k - Explicit

A High School AU where there are no werewolves and no hunters. Stiles is getting ready for his senior year when he meets Derek at the coffee shop he works at.

What I Go To School For - goodnight_tinyhumans - 5k - Teen

Derek is having a hard time with chemistry. Stiles is one of the best students in the class. This couldn't possibly go wrong.

Worth the Wait* - Dexterous_Sinistrous - 13k - Explicit

Stiles always had a thing for Derek, but then again, so did everyone else. Stiles just wanted to be seen as different, which was why he waited. But maybe he waited a little too long.

You Can’t Dodge Stiles Stilinski - stilinskisparkles - 27k - Explicit

“And this is it?” he points at the first girl. “I saw you in first period, you barely bothered to catch any of the balls you were tossed. I’m pretty sure you spent more time on your cell.”

The girl rolls her eyes, and looks completely unashamed of the fact she had her phone out in class. Derek knows Finstock would have stepped on it.

“And you,” he points at the second girl, taller and with eyes that meet Derek’s coolly. “You can’t throw anything worth half a damn. And what are you,” he points at the boy, trying not to look him in the eye, and failing. “A hundred and fifty pounds wet?”

The boy smirks at him, and Derek looks resolutely away. He’s now desperately trying not to picture him wet.

"I can't work with this."

(You Drive Me) Crazy -  I_glitterz - 5k - Explicit

When he catches Stiles looking at him, his lip quirks up the tiniest bit and Stiles’ insides melt as his heart starts to race. A blush spreads across his face and he looks back at Scott’s love struck face when he catches Allison walking into her classroom.

He’s pretty sure he’s just as gone on Derek as Scott is on Allison, but at least Scott has a fat chance in hell with Allison.

You Look Like Bad News (I Gotta Have You) -  standinginanicedress - 38k - Explicit

Option A : violently tell Derek that they are under no circumstances ever to hook up again because it was stupid and dumb.

Option B : tell Scott the truth, stand back and watch as Scott kills Derek with his bare hands so Stiles doesn't even have to face the music. Not an option at all, actually. Expunge this from the record.

The real Option B : calmly explain to Derek that the situation is too fucked up and hey, maybe if Derek and Scott ever shake hands and make up, he and Stiles can hook up again because, man...it was great.

Option C : forget everything, charge headfirst into danger like fuckin' Bravehart and have sex with Derek all over again.

Option D : bury himself alive and wait for the worms to eat him.

You’re The Comeback Kid - capeofstorm - 45k - Mature

Derek Hale doesn't do friends, not after the fire that claimed his entire family and landed him in foster care. He just wants to graduate and get on with his life. But Laura always said he was a bleeding heart and that's how he ends up with Erica Reyes as his best friend after he helps her through a seizure one day. 

Erica's not content with being the loser epileptic anymore, not now that she's Derek's friend. She intends to become the uncrowned queen of the school because running things from behind the scenes is always fun. 

Add in Stiles Stilinski, the guy Derek can't help but notice and help with some bully trouble.

And how the hell did Erica talk him into taking Isaac Lahey under his wing?

[omgokiguess]

TW long post about computers, the cloud, other tech bs, etc

i like already know i’m gonna get a B in algorithms. i’m kind of like what is even the point of trying my best because even if i try my best my perfect 90 year old female professor will write such hard tests and there’s just no way i’ll be able to get an A. even if i took her class twice i don’t think i’d get an A. but i also think it’d be pretty hard for me to get a C as long as i just do the work. which i will obviously. so i like.... idk i don’t feel as motivated. like with math i was motivated, i knew i was one of the only people that had enough math background to possibly get an A. and it still did take quite a bit of effort tbh but i did. but with this i’m really like.... no. it wouldn’t be worth it. i’d have to never sleep and even then i just don’t think i could. not with her as the teacher, (basically the entire grade is tests except for 5% homework). but i also know i won’t get a C so it’s like.... i guess i’ll just not kill myself over it and accept the B and not freak out too much. i’m sure i’ll always be over the median still but... it’s still gonna be a B, it just is.

i’m not sure how hard it will be for me to get an A in cloud computing. i think i can get an A and i’ll def give my best in there to get an A. like.... maybe i can? idk if there will be a curve or not and idk anyone that’s ever taken this class or has had this prof.... but he’s like honestly a really brilliant guy. i kind of imagine he won’t give a curve. i’ll actually try my hardest in cloud for sure though.

and surprisingly data analysis.... which i thought would be really hard.... is by far my easiest class and even with no effort i will get an A in that. i actually wish we were going into more math models but it’s more focused on learning R and understanding a meaningful and useful approach to analyzing data. which is fine. but i really thought it would be more math. cause yervand took a different data class and he told me they went through all of these continuous random variable models and that sounded really cool to me but... guess this class is just not the same.

so like i think best case i get two As and a B and worst case i get one A and two Bs. and i’m gonna accept either. anything less than that and i’ll hate myself. just... just no C’s allowed. and also nothing but an A allowed in data analysis.

idk i just really thought a class titled “applied data analysis” would like.... teach us how to properly like..... use algorithms to make meaning of genome analysis or shit like that like i thought it’d be really cool. right now so far it’s been more like analyzing data in databases which like.... i didn’t need a class for that. but the syllabus does say more math later so hopefully it changes. but the prof isn’t even smart tbh. like.... he gets a lot of stuff wrong like i had to tell him that the standard deviation of a normal curve was 68% like... that’s p common knowledge among math people. i have to say though between cloud and algorithms i do need an easy class so i’m glad i do have one. i had no idea cloud would be this hard. the syllabus was like “know web programming!” and i was like yeah i know web programming fuck i know socket programming v well but i’m just not used to programming applications that are made for distributed systems. almost ALL academic classes just teach you to program standalone shit. i’ve really never even come close to doing anything for a distributed system. and even at work we didn’t use AWS at ALL. we literally had like.... 400 of our own servers and since there were only like.... 150 employees, most of whom were not programmers, the distributed aspect of that was kind of negligible. and everything customers used was basically their own problem, we had a support team but we didn’t help operate any of their shit. i haven’t been trained to think about failing resources and i definitely don’t program accordingly. so i’m really gonna have to switch mindsets here.

it’s kind of disappointing that at this point i care the most about cloud tho. cause like.... i thought i was just taking it to learn about AWS tbh. but like.... since it’s a questionable A/B for me where as alg isn’t i care more about cloud. and since data is easy i don’t even care about it. i actually really like cloud.

and my prof for cloud, who is really a fucking CLOUD EXPERT like i won’t go through his credentials but it does blow my mind, he like REALLY emphasizes the cloud tradeoffs and honestly it does blow my mind. he talks about tradeoffs sooo much and like.... idk the tradeoff with the cloud is such an understatement. Amazon’s cloud service totally beats google’s and microsoft’s (actually i think it may have been a mistake on microsoft’s part to even try to roll out a cloud service) but like idk even AWS i’m like.... idk like i just totally get it. i totally get why you’d opt to pay money for AWS. but like..... idk depending how much computing power and memory you actually need..... i feel like most normal tech companies would only save like 5% by switching to the cloud, including absolutely all costs possible, sysadmins, infrastructure, everything. and the thing i don’t like about AWS is performance is not guaranteed. like you’re SHARING resources with so many other people. and.... idk. it’s hard for me to believe that it was a wise business decision for netflix to move to AWS. that’s really hard for me to believe really.

like idk.... i would honestly try to stay away from AWS as much as possible personally. i don’t want to force sysadmins to have to work for major companies that have cloud services, i don’t like the lack of transparency in what/where my shit is happening, etc. but... really.... there are certain ventures i could pursue where i would say yeah i really have to use AWS.

and as for security.... people generally think AWS is safer from a resource failure standpoint but man.... most datacenters are fucking safe and like idk.... resource/power failure just isn’t that concerning to me if you keep your resources up to date and in a datacenter. and i GUESS AWS is safer from attacks.... but is it really? like tbh.... i know amazon has more money and power but like.... your security can really be only so up to date. i mean i guess security does have to incorporate finances in some point.... but like.... idk i just CANNOT think in terms of “not having enough money”. If you’re really confident in yourself.... debt is not scary. You just take money from whoever and have full faith in your idea until you make it. If you know what you’re doing, if you really know what you’re doing, it’ll work. and i really never pursue anything unless i have full confidence. like i can’t think of a time i had full confidence in something and was incorrect, so i’m like .... just not worried about it lol.

[kang-yoochanie]

How to survive high school (by a straight A and mentally ill high school graduate)

If this post isn't a way to show that through 4 years of high school I have SUCKED at titling things then I don't know what is.

Anyways, long-ass titles aside, this is a mini guide for kids about to go into grade 9, or any grade really, who want to prepare themselves or change themselves.

Cause boy do I know you change a lot through high school. Thank god. 

Don’t expect this to be formal, or funny (unless you have my sense of humour in which case I think it’s fucking hilarious but that’s besides the point), but hopefully it will be helpful. (tip 1; long intros like this are useless 90% of the times, this time being part of that 90%) 

1) Honestly you may as well just buy yourself two locks for your locker right away. Have one locking your locker, and the other on you or at home. My locks broke so many times, or I forgot what the combo was, I went through so many of those fucking things (except in grade 12, I just gave up and stopped using my locker even though that was against the rules at my school lmao)

2) Dressing nice can be fun and can be a way to motivate yourself to get up in the morning, but don’t stress about what others will think about how you’re dressed or how you look. By the end of the day everyone’s going to look like trash any ways, so don’t bother

3) Those guidance counsellors? Yea. Use ‘em. Even if they’re the worst people on the planet Earth, use them. They can help tell your teachers about your problems, or just give you a quiet place to sit for a bit. 

4) DON’T STRESS ABOUT THE FUTURE. Everyone’s gonna say “you’re in grade 9, you better start thinking about what you wanna be” and they’ll say that every goddamn year. But let me tell you. I knew from grade 7 I wanted to go to art school. I really wanted to be an artist. I applied to an art school this year, I got into that art school this year, and I declined the offer. In my last few months of high school I changed my mind. I decided that I didn’t know what the fuck I wanted to do, so I chose a program that’s sort of like English. TLDR; people change their fucking minds. So don’t stress about it

5) Now this may differ from country to country but Universities and colleges don’t look at your grade 9 or 10 marks. They don’t give a shit if you got a 20% on a test in grade 9 (which I did lmao). They will only look at 11 and 12, and really they only look at your grade 11 marks for early acceptances. If you have shitty grade 11 marks but good grade 12 marks then you’re fine.

6) Speaking of Universities, apply to every single one that you can. I applied to something like 10 different schools/programs. Some of them I didn’t even know if I wanted to go into them. Some of them were incredibly hard to get into and I was sure I wasn’t going to get in. But I applied to everything that caught my interest, so that I could have doors open. (and, as it turns out, the program I’m going into was one of those last minute ‘i’m not sure if i’ll like this or not but it sounds kinda cool so I’ll apply’)

7) Learn new study habits. The jump between grade 8 and 9 (and 10 and 11 so rip your 10ers) is insane. It’s normal for grades to drop a bit (or a lot @ my multiple failed tests in gr 9 lmao) but just take it with grace and learn which way of studying works best for you. (protip: figure out if you’re an auditory, visual, or kinesthetic learner. If you’re 2, or like me and all 3 of them, then your just have to figure out which subject you learn best with which learning style. for example, in math I learn best by doing (kinesthetic) but I suck at learning math by seeing (visual), but in history I learn best by discussing and hearing (auditory) and seeing (visual), but if you make me act out history, write notes or anything like that I won’t learn shit.) 

8) If you’re not a math or science person, don’t take them. Same goes for English, or any other subject. In my school system it was required for you to take english every year, so there was no getting out of that, but I could chose to stop taking math after grade 11, and science after grade 10. A lot of people associate being good at math and science as being “smart”, and I got a lot of comments that because I wasn’t taking them my studies were “easy”. And trust me, if you decide to not take them you’ll hear the same thing. But the thing is, you don’t need them. If you’re going into an English program, then why in the fucking world would you take Chemistry or math?? What’s the use of it? Once you know the basic skills in both subjects I say drop it, unless you need it or find it fun. 

9) Speaking of not doing things that you can’t, each country has different terms for the “upper” level classes and the “lower” level classes. So I’ll be referring to them as just that. If you find that an “upper” level class goes too fast for you or you just aren’t learning from it, go to the lower level. Not all your classes have to be “upper” and not all have to be “lower”, it all depends on you. You’re not smarter for being in an “upper” level class, and you’re not dumber for being in a “lower” level class. It’s all based on styles of learning. That’s it. and 95% of the time, the two levels learn the same things, just at different paces and with different techniques. 

10) If you have a mental illness, let your teachers know. Even if you don’t want to tell anyone. Even if you think it’s embarrassing. Trust me, telling your teachers will make your life 100% easier, a lot of them are very understanding. I had teachers who would let me leave the class with a friend at any point I felt like I was going to have an anxiety attack. And when I went through my major depressive episodes and missed weeks of school, my teachers let me do work at home that was strictly in class work or let me delay tests or just skip units all together, and I often got extra time for everything. But if I hadn’t told them about my situation, I would have ended up being stuck and probably would have failed all my classes.

11) If someone offers you help, take it. ALWAYS ACCEPT HELP. Even if you have a stupid sense of pride (like me) and think you can do everything by yourself (like me) YOU CAN’T (like...you guessed it, me). Trust me, when a parent, teacher, or even sibling helps you with homework, or essays or studying, it just makes things easier. 

12) Take notes. I know I said taking notes doesn’t always help me, or other people, but do it anyways. And not on your computer. Hand write your notes, even if you have the messiest fucking handwriting, just do it. It’s been proven that you’re more likely to retain information that you handwrite over notes on a computer or reading, no matter what your learning type is. 

13) Don’t do things last minute. Don’t do your project last minute, or your essay, or study for a test. Cramming doesn’t work. Basically what I’m saying is manage your time properly. If you have 2 weeks to study for a test, take those two weeks. Don’t take just 10 hours the night before. 

14) We’re almost done, don’t worry. Join extra curricular activities! HAVE A LIFE. Literally it’s one of my biggest regrets that I didn’t do more. If you aren’t a sports person, join clubs. If you aren’t a clubs person, join sports. If you’re neither, join student council or something. If you want access to everything (sports, clubs, etc) join Yearbook, it’s a great way to be involved while also hiding from everyone. But join things, make new friends. Have a life. It’ll make things SO much easier

15) Speaking of friends, don’t worry about them. You’re going to make new friends, lose friends and then repeat. You and everyone else change so much through high school it’s almost impossible to constantly have the exact same friend group. So don’t worry if you lose friends, you’re going to make new ones, I promise. 

14) My last and most important point; GRADES DON’T MATTER. It’s a number (or letter) that is marking you on how you felt the day you were taking a test or doing a presentation. That’s all it is. It’s not testing your intelligence, it’s not something to compete over. It’s just a stupid little number. I’m not saying ignore it completely, still try to work hard to learn things, but don’t do it for the sole reason of getting a good grade. One of the biggest things I learned in my last two years of high school was that when I was stressed about my grades and studied for the only purpose of getting a 90%, and literally gave up my life to study, I often didn’t do well. Those are the times when I failed tests, and also the times where I barely was able to get an 80% average. But in 11 and 12 I decided to take it easy. I studied a little bit every second or third night, but I tried not to stress about it. On nights before tests I would limit myself and never stay up past midnight. I forced myself to not care about grades even though every little anxious bone in me told me to care. And I went from having an 80.2% average in grade 10, to an 88% in grade 11 and a 92.5% in grade 12 (i feel inclined to say it was 95% but I had two hard ass teachers second semester so uh yeah that sucked). SO DON’T STRESS. LET GO OF THE IMPORTANCE OF GRADES. RAISE YOUR MIDDLE FINGER TO THAT A. Just do the best you can and then continue to push yourself to do better. Do it because you want to, not because you want a higher grade.

I hope this was somewhat helpful. High school is what you make of it, it can be fun, or horrible, so try to have fun with it. I have a lot of good memories from it. The best piece of advice I can really give is just be aware that your life isn’t only school, and it doesn’t end after high school. (Also always buy your teachers christmas gifts or end of year gifts, they will love you and you will instantly become a favourite)

[pacman-tattoo]

finally [michael m. x canigula!reader]

( I just had the most embarrassing experience... So I thought it would be perfect if I requested it as a Michael x reader. So the reader has a crush on Michael and gives him hints. When they are alone. The reader tries to kisses his cheek and does it wrong and is completely embarrassed. Michael then tries to help her by kissing her on the lips. So just make it awkward at the failed kissing the cheek part and then super fluffy at the end. Sorry I just... I need to relive this in my musical world... )

(honestly still big mood like i feel u nonny)

also combined with:

( Oooooo what abt Christine and Reader are siblings and Christine tries to set up Michael and reader??? O: )

also whats this?? tris actually posts a thing??? it’s more likely than u think

warnings: none except its not the best but its not the worst thing i’ve ever written

      Christine wasn’t one to meddle in your business - especially when said business was your love life. It wasn’t her place to sit around and talk about cute people that she could secretly set you up with or anything of the sort. But when it became devastatingly obvious neither you or a certain headphones-wearing boy weren’t going to make the first move despite the obvious feelings that were fluttering between you, she decided to take matters into her own hands only slightly.

      And by slightly, she meant she was going to push you two together the best she could and pray that maybe one of you would actually realize there’s something there.

      So when the opportunity arose of you needing someone to tutor you in math, Christine told you she had just the person since she was too busy with rehearsal for the school’s musical. You were glad - you really needed a tutor and you really did trust Christine if she had someone immediately come to mind. After all, she had plenty of friends there would definitely be a couple who were good at precalculus-

      And Michael Mell was standing at your front door. When Christine said she had a friend, you didn’t expect it to be Michael of all people.

      He smiled at you and you swore you felt your cheeks become warm - he’s so cute, this isn’t fair. “Hey, [y/n]! Christine said you needed help with precal?”

      You nodded slowly, before mutely stepping out of the doorway for him to come in. He brushed past you as he did and you swore your heart skipped a beat. You shut the door before turning to Michael,  “I just... it’s kind of dumb and I don’t wanna fail the next test but I just... can’t wrap my head around any of this.”

     “No problem,” Michael said, sliding his backpack off of his shoulder, “Jeremy’s terrible at math, so I’m kinda used to tutoring him.”

      You smiled a little. “We can work in the dining room,” you said, motioning to the open doorway, “just lemme grab my notes ‘n stuff.”

      He didn’t have a chance to respond because you were upstairs and texting Christine the moment you were sure you were out of sight.

      [y/n]: when u said u had a tutor for me

      [y/n]: i didnt know u meant michael 

      christine: ? 

      [y/n]: omg christine please

      [y/n]: CHRISTINE PLEAS E

      christine: Can’t talk, at play rehearsal

      [y/n]: gdi

      You frowned as you swung into your room, grabbing your bag from the floor and tossing it onto your bed. You unzipped your bag quickly, searching for the blue binder that held all of your precal notes and worksheets - some of which you might have left undone - before returning downstairs to where Michael was now sitting, back facing you. Alright. You would be fine. It’s just Michael. Just Michael. Michael who you’ve had a crush on since freshman year and Michael who would smile at you in the hallway and told you that you looked cute and probably wasn’t even into you because he probably liked someone else who wasn’t awkward or-

      You pressed your lips together. Precal. Math. Grades. Right.

      Michael came by the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that - partially because you were caught up in the fact that he’d chew at the end of his pen when he was concentrating sometimes and you’d kind of start staring at his lips because wow he has pretty lips and he’s just really pretty, is that weird? Are boys allowed to be pretty - what kind of a question even is that? Definitely. Michael was fucking gorgeous. 

      And then he’d ask you a question. And you had to look down at the paper and admit you didn’t know or just kind of acknowledge that he asked something and one time he asked if you understood everything and you only said sure before he smiled and packed up his stuff and left and you didn’t know shit. So Christine would come into your room and ask how studying with Michael went with this little tone of voice as if maybe you two had been up to something else instead of studying - which, was silly because that’d never happen because Michael’s not into you - and then she saw you were stressed and confused over math. Fuck math. Math is terrible sometimes.

      So then the doorbell rang and you’d be there and you knew it was Michael because he had this habit of knocking anyway, steady in a one-two beat. He’d walk in, you’d offer him something - a snack, maybe a can of whatever soda you had tucked away in some corner of the fridge - and then the two of you would sit and work on math until one or both of you got tired. It was usually laid-back and the two of you would crack jokes and sometimes his hand would brush against your own and it was small but it still grabbed your attention. 

      Then you had a precal test on Wednesday. Your nerves were bundled and you shoved your feelings aside the next time you saw Michael. You tried to ignore the little glances he kept giving you, until finally his hand was on yours. You looked away from your notes, meeting his eyes for the first time that evening.

     “You alright?”

      You nodded. “Just... nervous. About the test.”

     “Don’t be. You’re smart,” he smiled a little.

     “I just... I don’t want to fail. Not after all this studying.”

     “You won’t.”

      You frowned, before speaking again, “I just... I dunno. I don’t wanna disappoint anybody.”

      Michael didn’t speak at first, only staring at you. He ran his thumb over the back of your hand, “well... you’d try, right?” You nodded slowly. “So... you wouldn’t disappoint me.” He quickly followed up his statement, “-or Christine, or Jeremy or anyone. We’d be proud.”

      You smiled at him. “Thanks, Michael. You’re sweet.”

      Your test went about as well as you’d expect it. You finished and immediately regretting it and already started to make up plans for how you’d live your life after becoming a failure. The usual with tests, even if you knew everything on it because that felt too easy? It couldn’t have been that easy, right?

      But you saw Michael in the hallway and he broke away from Jeremy and Christine to greet you.

      “How’d you do?”

      You shrugged. “I don’t wanna jinx it.”

      He smiled. “Alright. Hey, uh,” he glanced back to Christine and Jeremy, “you wanna grab lunch with us? Take your mind off the test.”

      You nodded. What a sweetheart.

      Wait.

      A sweet friend.

      That’s what you meant.

      Totally.

      Michael is your friend because Michael doesn’t have feelings for you even though you would definitely be fine if he had feelings for you but he doesn’t because he’s Michael.

      No matter what Christine implies.

      “Did you enjoy lunch with Michael?”

      You looked over to Christine, who had her eyes pinned to the road, and a smile peeking through the little mask she put on whenever she talked about Michael. “You say that like you and Jeremy weren’t there.”

      “We-ll...” She drew out the word.

      “Christine.”

      “You two talked a lot.”

      “Christine.”

      “I mean, Jeremy and I kiinda sat there.”

      “Michael doesn’t like me like that.”

      Christine only smiled. “Everyone’s coming over for movie night on Friday.”

      You looked out at the passing houses, leaning against the door. “Your turn?”

      “Yeah.”

      “Alright. I’ll lock myself in my room or something.”

      “You could join us, if you want,” she said, drumming her fingers against the steering wheel, “no one would mind.”

      “They’re your friends,” you shrugged.

      “Michael’s your friend. And Jeremy.”

      You only shrugged again. “Maybe.”

      The sound of a paper being slapped onto your desk brought you out of a daydream you managed to escape to. You looked up, your teacher already desks away as you looked down to the sheet, slowly turning it over.

      An eighty-seven. You made an eighty-seven, holy fuck that was better than what you expected. You’d thank Michael. You had to thank him, especially considering he was sweet and reminded you that you did your best.

      So when you saw him after school, you took off running toward him, calling out his name as you approached him. You threw your arms around him, not giving him a chance to process what was happening as you roughly pressed your lips again his cheek - a little too hard and a little too fast and -fuck he probably hated you but you brushed it off as you bounced back.

      “Eighty-seven!” You cheered, grinning from ear to ear. he stared at you, before smiling and realizing just what you’d been talking about before he pulled you back into his arms.

      “Dude! That’s amazing!”

      You drew away after a few moments. “Sorry.” He stared at you. “The uh... cheek. Sorry, that probably hurt you or something, fuck, I just- I’m not really good at kissing boys - or people in general or-”

      He was laughing. It was small and short and soft but it was still a laugh

      “I’d like to see you do better, Michael,” you frowned, looking away.

      He chuckled this time. “I... could help you.”

      You looked up and you were positive your face was burning. “What?”

      His lips were quick and soft against your own, and before you knew it he was already steps away and apologizing because wow he kinda had been wanting to do that for a while-

      “It’s fine,” you said softly, “I... kinda wanted that, honestly-" You decided to go for it. Now or never. “I’ve... kinda liked you for a while.”

      “Really?” he said, voice breaking a little as he smiled, “I, uh... think you’re cute.”

      You only smiled in return, unsure of what to say other than

      "Finally. Thought you two would never admit it to each other.”

      “Jeremy? You knew?” Michael said, as his friend approached.

      “It was pretty obvious.”

      “What?”

      “... We all kind of knew?”

      “Oh my god.”

[finelineoutro]

2019 was probably one of the happiest years after a really long and mentally exhausting decade. for the better part of 8 years i suffered from severe depression. i don’t think it helped that i had tumblr, and back in 2011 black and white aesthetic blogs that totally glamorized depression and suicide were all the rage. 

starting out in high school i didn’t have many friends that i felt i could reach out to, all my friends were very surface level, i hung out with them at school and then went home and never seemed to do much outside of school. i had a horrible relationship with my mother to the point that if we weren’t screaming at each other, we weren’t talking. i was a student at a competitive school where if you weren’t taking all AP’s and didn’t have a 4.0 gpa, you weren’t doing it right. 2011-2013 were some of the worst years of my life, my depression was so debilitating that i couldn’t pay attention in school, let alone do my homework when i got home. i got a D in math which was the lowest grade i have ever gotten. i got a detention for writing some fictional story during math class instead of paying attention. all i could ever focus on was how much my life sucked and how much i wanted to disappear. i would fantasize about my own funeral and who would care and if my mom would cry. honestly, one thing that truly kept me going was finding solace in one direction. admittedly i was a l*rrie yIKES but i think it was just nice to have something i was so invested in that preoccupied my mind and my time. 

i was lucky enough to find a group of close knit friends in 2014. it gave me a social life and i finally felt like i belonged somewhere, even if i did often feel like an outsider within the group. but, they were my best friends. it helped immensely. not to mention they also loved 1d and i finally had people i could go to their shows with (i had gone to tmh alone lmao), i could geek out about with, etc. one of the girls from that group became my best friend and still is to this day. in 2015 we went to dinner and got sat at a table right next to louis (at the time, i was still a huge fan of his). i still recall this as being one of the happiest moments of my life at the time. 

i had decided to go to university in new york city (i’m from la). it kind of was an escape to get away from the small suburb i’m from, and to get as far away from my mom. my relationship with her, at this point, had deteriorated to next to nothing. we only ever fought. looking back at it, i know she was just worried. at the end of my senior year of high school, i had missed 35+ days of school. some were days that i just didn’t go. some were days that i missed my first few classes, or skipped before my last few. the only class i continuously got an A in was english. and shout out to my english teacher, who truly was a shining light in my life without even knowing it. she was so attentive, kind, intelligent, and taught me so much. i was lucky enough to have her for freshman year english, junior year english, and a semester long senior seminar and she truly was one of the few things i look back at in high school and i am thankful for. 

ANYWAY, i decided to go to the east coast for college. it was amazing, don’t get me wrong, but it was lonely as fuck. and i know that’s kind of the untold college experience that people seem to forget to mention. college is lonely as fuck. but i would see all my friends instagram stories and see them out at college parties, making friends, joining greek life, etc, and that was not at all what was happening where i was at. i was friends with my roommates, and a few people on the same floor as me, but other than that, i didn’t have many friends. by the time the dust settled, and i was used to living in new york, i realized i wasn’t happy at all. i was in automatic and just going through the motions. 

anyway, fast forward to 2017-2018, things started looking up. sort of. i studied abroad in london and met one of my best friends. she happened to go to my home university too, a super extrovert with tons of friends, so when i went back to school a semester later, i suddenly had a new group of friends to hang out with. 

at the same time, however, i was questioning my sexuality, which was probably one of the hardest and most confusing times of my life. i felt like i didn’t have anyone to talk to (except for my one online friend, thank u becca). it’s not that i didn’t think my friends would be accepting, i just didn’t think they’d understand my situation. i also wasn’t sure i felt like explaining. anyway, my life was pretty much split in two. i had online friends via tumblr, and my friends from school. when i was out with them, i felt fairly happy. distracted. when i was home, alone, i felt anxious and sad and i knew i was getting bad again. i really did not want to go back to that dark time in my life though, but i could literally feel myself spiraling. i went to bed nearly every night nauseated with anxiety, i was losing sleep, gaining weight, losing my hair, breaking out, having straight up melt downs where i would cry so hard i couldn’t catch my breath. i was in a codependent friendship (which was toxic on my part) but i didn’t know how to let go, because the thought of it made me feel even worse than i already did. 

at the end of 2018, i had cut out two people in my life that were causing me a great deal of pain. 

i went into 2019 with a fresh start. admittedly, i still felt like shit. especially for all of january, before i had gone back to school, and all i could think about was not being friends with two people that i had spent the last 2 years talking to nearly every day. but then i went back to school. i started my internship with the elvis duran show, which was one of the best things to ever happen to me. i finally fit in at an internship, i finally was surrounded by people who liked pop music just as much as i did, i felt like i could speak my mind, i was doing social media and i was excelling. i absolutely loved it. i got even closer with my roommate/best friend, and my friend from study abroad. i had an apartment that i loved. i was working part time at a restaurant and my coworkers were amazing. my managers loved me and always had my back in everything. i had 2 amazing professors that only wanted to see their students succeed. i got to see fleetwood mac at madison square garden. i was working hard and seeing results. i managed to save $4,000 for my europe trip. i graduated college and walked across the stage at radio city music hall. 

after graduating, i went home for a month, got to spend time with my niece, then was off to europe with four of my closest friends. we went to spain, france, italy, croatia. i met my parents and family in croatia and we went to the island my mom was born and raised in (one of my favorite places in the world, a tiny little croatian village with less than 100 people on one of the most beautiful islands), and spent 2 weeks with my family there. i was in europe for 6 weeks, it was so fucking amazing. 

and when i went home, not even 3 weeks later, i went to see the rolling stones with my mom. from the 14th row. it was unreal. 

i have been spending the last few months of 2019 applying to jobs and babysitting my little niece almost full time. she’s 3 (turning 4 soon) and such a handful but also a beautiful little angel that i love with all my heart. on december 13, i got to go see harry styles fine line live at the forum. so, within the year of 2019, i got to see my top 3 artists live. fleetwood mac in march, rolling stones in august, and harry in december. 

i’m still working on getting a job and being out of work for so long, as a capricorn, has been admittedly pretty awful. however, this job proposition is looking promising, i’ve had 3 interviews, and it’s at my dream company (i’ll definitely post what it is if i get it !!). 

i am, mentally, at the best place i have been in a long time. and i’m really proud of myself. so cheers to 2019 for helping me get over an awful decade, and here’s to a new decade and, if i start my new job in january (fingers crossed), a new chapter to my life! 

happy new year

[powertobehandsome]

In the Wake || Andrew and Ryan

Part one. I broke this up by scene. But I love these two a whole hell of a lot. Also, pretty sure this is the only safe for work part. XD ily. || @theveritasi

“What do you think Seth and Matt are up to?” Foggy asked Ryan, once his bagel popped out of the toaster. “And you said – Montparnasse went off with an assassin? Like, what, to – assassinate people together? That’s kind of – ow, ow, hot – disturbing.” He sucked on his fingertips, then started putting cream cheese on.

“Probably having sex on the still littered with dinner dining room table?” Ryan replied casually, shrugging as he said it. “And as for the other two? I didn’t ask much about what they do together. I know that the one guy is the one who… I mean, I was there when he delivered Elektra and Seth. But he’s a damn good shot with a gun. Scary good. And… I suppose his accent is kinda hot….

"Erm. Sorry. Montparnasse’s shamelessness I think is getting to my head.”

Foggy shrugged and came back over with the bagel, then plopped down on the couch with him. “So… how are you doing? I mean – I kinda thought, and I don’t mean any offense, but I wasn’t sure if there was something between you and the little guy? Was it just professional, um, whatever he does? CIA?”

Foggy immediately raised his hands. “Not that I am asking what he does. I really, really don’t want to know the truth.”

“I mean… He literally healed my gunshot wound with a kiss. And I’m not saying I wouldn’t have slept with him. But there was no… I’m not quite as quick to fall in love with people as Seth is…” Ryan sighed. “Sorry. I don’t mean that to sound like he jumps from one person to the next. He doesn’t. Actually, I haven’t seen him with someone in a few years. But when he starts to fall for someone, he goes all in.”

This hadn’t been at all what Foggy had asked, and Ryan looked awkwardly down at his hands. “This is why I don’t talk much. I don’t know what ‘Parnasse does. Few afternoons over there and I’m still as unsure as ever.”

“If it’s any consolation, we’ve known him about a year, and I still don’t even know what neighborhood he lives in. Super secretive little guy. Hey, you want a beer?” Foggy popped up to get himself one, and paused at the fridge.

“Please,” Ryan called back, his arm stretching along the back of the couch. “So, has there been any more threats from Elektra’s minions since the day she died?”

“Not that I’ve heard… as far as I know, everything’s just like, normal and stuff.” He came back with the beer and sat down again, handing Ryan his. “So are you okay, though? And if I am prying too much, just let me know, I know I pry, it’s a thing. But you and Montparnasse, are you bummed? Cause I bet I could totally beat up the… what is the other guy? French? I could totally take him.”

“The assassin? He’s English, I think. And it’s like he has this high-class tinge to his accent, but he tries to hide it. Like he’s ashamed of the money he probably came from. And I mean… I’m maybe a little bummed. Though, the guy is like… forty. A professional hitman. And, honestly, he’s not bad looking. Have you ever seen pictures of Wade Wilson without his mask? Seth showed them to me a year or so ago while he was working on one of his stories. I think that is what Wilson would look like if his skin hadn’t been fucked up.”

Ryan shrugged and took a sip of the beer, seeming to relax as it worked through his body. “I’m plenty happy spending my time in New York looking at architecture and historical sites. Or relaxing with friends. I don’t really need a whirlwind romance. It’s fine if it comes. But…” He shrugged. “I’m fine.”

“Hey, you’re worth more than just a fling anyway. But like, at least if the little guy is hanging out with you and doing whatever shaaady stuff you guys have been doing, that’s got to mean something, right? Cause the vibe I got off him? Is he’s like that X-Files thing. Trust No One. Or… no, yeah, yeah, that was on at least one episode, instead of the truth is out there. 

"So architecture though, huh? Are you like – is that what you do?”

Ryan nodded. “I worked construction as a teenager before the Cohen’s took me in. Then Kirsten worked in her father’s housing development company. And I got to be around floor plans and home designs, and they put me in a really great private school which actually gave me the opportunity to go to college…

“I work in a small firm now, making my way one design at a time. But I’m doing it on my own. Kirsten didn’t set me up with the job. So I… guess I’m kind of happy with what I’ve accomplished. But what about you, Foggy? Any romances to speak of?”

“Nah…” He sighed. “I’m super in love with our assistant, Karen, but there’s nothing there, I mean. I think she just has eyes for Matt, you know? Which most people do. Doesn’t matter who. He just…. ssshhhhhp, draws them in. And sometimes I sleep with a shark, Marcy, but she’s…. scary. Like really scary. Also not a relationship. I dunno. Maybe some things just aren’t meant to be right away, right? 

"You must be really smart though. Isn’t that basically all math?”

“Math is what I’m good at, yeah. But it’s… I don’t know, Architecture in college wasn’t quite what I expected it to be. You had four hour studio classes twice a week to work on "rough models” for your final project. And the teacher would assign like… thirty models to be completed. And then it was sketches, which I’m not terribly great at, but I know how a building works, I took a few engineering classes to accompany it because what good does a building do you if it’s pretty but not structurally sound.“ Ryan shrugged. "Math is easy. There’s always one correct answer. And… fitting a building together is sometimes like tetris. It’s a puzzle. I enjoy it.”

“And I know what you mean about the girls, or the relationships, I guess. Sometimes it just doesn’t work because it’s not meant to right then.”

“Yeah… but it’s nice to have warm fuzzy feelings anyway, even if they aren’t returned.” He took another swallow of the beer, bit the bagel, then made an excited sound. When he could talk again, he asked, “Have you been to the underground grave thing in Paris? That’s a thing, right? That’s supposed to be really interesting with – I’m sorry, I literally don’t anything about architecture, just exciting stuff I see on YouTube, but, have you?”

“I haven’t. I kept telling myself I was going to get out of the county. Especially since literally everybody I know in California has been. But I just never made it out. I read about them in school though.” Ryan sat back and listened to the thunder rattle the windows and the rain pour down. He drank the beer slowly, and let it warm his face. “I see Seth got you caught up on the good bagels. That kid… he got it from his dad. Bagels are a Jewish holy commodity.”

“I think they’re an everybody holy commodity. Want a bite? Also, you should go with Andrew. I can’t, we have another tenancy case coming up that’s probably going to take twenty hours a day because of stupid reasons, but Andrew mentioned going back to Europe and wanting to drag someone along. It’s kind of tough to picture him getting lonely cause, I mean, perfect man, but he said he was gonna go to a couple countries.. I’m not sure why though. Something about Transylvania? Maybe he needs to get in touch with his vampire side or something.”

 People said things, and Ryan just nodded and went along with it. Assassins was the easiest to believe. Then superheroes and vampires. He didn’t know what was next, nor did he care to find out. But Ryan mulled over the proposal and pursed his lips in consideration. “I might do that, if he really wants someone to join him. I’m sure I can leave Seth here with Matt, though I’m sure he’ll be busy helping you with work. Still, Seth would make a pretty good housewife. Except he’s terrible about cleaning up after himself…” Ryan smirked. “Speaking of your job. I don’t think I’ve formally thanked you for what you did for us. And then… I remember… you sitting at my bedside. And just. You are a better friend than you are attorney, and for me, that is saying something. Because you were one hell of an attorney for me and Seth.”

Foggy was suddenly staring down at beer and bagel, trying not to cry. It was stupid how really nice, happy things just got to someone sometimes. After a minute, he just mentally said fuck it and leaned over and scooped Ryan up into a hug. 

“Uugghhh, you made me cry, jerkface. Thank you. I’m glad that – you know. Glad to be your friend. Thanks.” Before the hug could get too long, he made himself let go. “Sorry. Um. Exuberant hugger.”

Ryan laughed awkwardly and hugged him back, but relaxed back onto the couch when he was released. “No worries. Did you… have any plans for tonight. It’s raining pretty hard. We could go crash whatever party Matt and Seth are having. Or we could go to a bar… though maybe not Josie’s. I don’t think they want me in there again.”

“Yeeaaaah let’s maybe avoid Josie’s for the time being.” He laughed and took another bite of the bagel. “If they’re having sex though, we should probably leave them alone. Is there anywhere you’ve wanted to go yet but haven’t? Wanna pick up Andrew on the way, tell him that he’s taking you with him?”

“I don’t actually know if they’re having sex. I just know Seth had planned to make him dinner. They’ve both seemed… pretty hesitant on the physical affection, or as far as I’ve seen. And Seth isn’t really shy about PDA. So I don’t know. Probably reading too much into it. But yeah, Andrew sounds like a good plan. I’m sure he’ll take us some place that even I can’t afford.”

“I dunno, man, you notice how they just constantly orient towards each other? Like if Seth moves, Matt adjusts a little, and vice versa? There’s totally something there. Like, something real, I think. And sweet, okay. Let me…” He hopped up, grabbed his phone, put it on speaker, and called Andrew – but it didn’t ring. Instead, there was a strange, static whooshing noise. 

“What the…" 

"Sorry,” Andrew said, materializing in the corner. “I was incorporeal. What’s up?”

“JESUS SHIT CHRIST OH MY FUCKING GOD!”

Ryan had jumped enough at hearing the man’s voice that his beer spilled over his hand and onto his jeans, but he didn’t actually say anything. When the reality of the situation settled, the tension visibly eased from his shoulders and he sat back on the couch, licking the beer from his hand. 

“Do you always lurk in corners?”

“I wasn’t lurking! Are you two okay?" 

"Well not now that you gave me a freaking heart attack!” Foggy waved the last bite of bagel at Andrew. “We were gonna invite you to go out, or maybe to crash Seth and Matt’s whatever they’re–" 

Andrew made a face and shook his head. "Privacy for them tonight." 

"Whaa— wow — okay — well – Ryan, you have anywhere in mind tonight? Or do we let Captain Sexypants pick?”

Ryan smirked at the face Andrew made. “I told you they were probably doing it on the dinner Seth made them tonight.” He stood and downed the rest of his beer before finding the recycling bin and tossing it in. “I have nowhere particular in mind. This is your city. And I am just looking to go along for the ride.”

Andrew smiled. Montparnasse was right, he thought, Ryan really was a charmer. He didn’t quite understand why 'Parnasse had practically fallen into Sebastian’s pants when he could have tried to go after something casual but sweet with this man, but to each their own. 

“Alright. Well… if you guys leave it up to me, I’m going to drag you out to do karaoke with me." 

"YES! I love karaoke! I mean. I’m the worst at it. But I can make your hands clap! Let me just – put on a different shirt. Cause this one smells like – ew. Law.” Foggy dashed into his bedroom.

Ryan watched Foggy go with an affectionate smile, and then looked back at Andrew, his lips pinching into a smile and an awkward sort of look around the room.

“So… karaoke? I don’t… I mean. I don’t dance. And I’m really not a… social butterfly, I guess. So I’m happy to go and watch you two charm the crowd. But I don’t really… get involved… with that kind of thing. I’m really no fun at all. But I’m good at watching other people have fun. So there’s that.”.

Curious, Ryan was tempted to ask for more details about Seth and Matt, but he also knew it was none of his business, so he paced a little, waiting for Foggy to return.

“Do crowds make you uncomfortable?” he asked, sounding apologetic. “Hey man, it’s cool, we’ll find something else to do. What sounds best to you? Because I am super flexible." 

Foggy came out holding a dark blue shirt in one hand and a Hawaiian print in the other. "Which?”

“No. No. Shit. I’m sorry. That’s not at all the vibe I meant to give off. I want to go. I just… may not sing. But please. Don’t change the plans. I’m fine around crowds. I’m just awkward.” He felt like a dick for saying anything at all. “Sorry.

"The… Hawaiian,” Ryan said, even though the shirt was borderline offensive with how ugly it was. It fit the whole karaoke night theme of fun and ridiculousness. And Ryan thought it was perfect.

Foggy nodded and disappeared. 

Andrew, feeling like a dick for having asked, said, “No, don’t be sorry. Please. One of my friends can’t do crowds at all, they make him just sort of – he locks up and can’t function if he gets caught in one. As long as you won’t be feeling bad, we’re totally good.” Since they were going somewhere casual as hell, and Andrew was already wearing an all-black suit, he stripped out of his jacket while they talked. The tie came off, and then his shirt; under, he had on a sleeveless, tight, black undershirt. He put the jacket back on, leaving it unbuttoned, and while some guys might have looked a little douchey, Andrew managed to look amazing – but being the next best thing to a model had its perks. 

Foggy came out in shorts, sandals (with socks), the Hawaiian shirt, and a huge grin. “Okay. This is gonna be awesome. Ryan, I’d offer to loan you something, but all my stuff’s gonna be super baggy on you. Are we ready to rock and roll?”

Ryan was dressed in dark jeans and a charcoal grey t-shirt. He looked casual enough, but not overly so. and watching the two men stand side by side was the most amusing combination he’d ever seen. He smirked at Foggy, and then his eyes shifted again to Andrew – who Ryan had just appreciatively watched undress in the living room – and his gaze darkened just a little, likely unnoticeable to either party. He shook the settling lust away and cleared his throat.

“Shall we?” he asked, heading for the door and holding it open for both of them. “I… don’t mean to sound like a dick. But the stereotype for New Yorkers, is that none of you know how to drive. So, with my own safety planted somewhere in the back of my mind, how far away is this place? Do we get to take the subway? I’ve… that’s something I’m still yet to do. But if it’s too…” He looked at Andrew and smirked. “If it’s slumming it too much, we can always use another mode of transportation.”

“The subway? Oh, oh dear, no. No, mmm-mm. I hear there are locals down there.” Andrew grinned at Ryan as he passed by him, and Foggy awkwardly tried to hold the door for Ryan. 

“I dunno, Andrew, maybe locals are juuuuust what you need. And the kid wants to take the subway! Let’s take the subway." 

Andrew’s eyes were practically sparkling and he nodded. "Subway it is, then. And I’m not from New York, I know how to drive – for the record. I just don’t own a car." 

Foggy snorted. "What’s a car? Hey, Ryan, what’s a car?”

“Don’t know. I drive a Range Rover.”

He had met Andrew’s sparkling eyes and lifted a brow in response, following him out the door when Foggy tried to be the one to hold it, and then waited for him to lock it before they set off.

Ryan was quiet through most of their walk to the nearest entrance to the subway, and he had to purchase a temporary card for two and a half dollars, but when he swiped it and stood on the deck waiting for the next train to arrive, there was something disgusting and wonderful and exciting about the whole thing. It was… maybe nothing special. But it made him happy to be there, with these two loons, on his way to go to a karaoke bar?

Fuck, if anybody had told him before he boarded the plane in California that this would be the adventure he’d encounter in New York, he would have laughed at them and stayed home and gone swimming in his pool. But now… Now he couldn’t be more grateful.

“Thank you, guys. I’m really glad to have made friends here.”

Foggy laughed and crushed both of them to his chest in a bear hug. “I’m glad, too. You’re awesome, Ryan, you are awesome." 

—-

When they went back up into the world, Foggy was a little hesitant at the neighborhood. He had been in some rough places, but the street practically reeked of crime. For a moment he balked, but when Andrew walked out there like he hadn’t a care in the world, Foggy looked over at Ryan. "Ever sort of feel like your balls shrunk a little? Cause pretty sure mine did." 

The bar wasn’t too far away from the station, and once they were there, Foggy’s hesitation flew out the window. It was crowded and a little seedy looking, but the energy made up for it. The people were happy here, there was a lot of laughter and cheer, and it was one of the most positive places he’d been in a long time, even with the two people up on stage yowling terribly into a microphone. 

Andrew was already delighted, and he slipped an arm around both of their waists, holding each man for just a moment as if Ryan and Foggy were the most beautiful, wonderful, treasured people on the planet. "What are you guys drinking? I’ll go get them if you want to try and find a table or something?”

Ryan’s lips parted as he took in all the people, and he looked around, trying to spot some place they could all sit together. The closer to the stage it got, the scarcely populated the tables seemed to be. But Ryan figured that was exactly where Foggy and Andrew wanted to sit. A spot opened up, and Ryan patted Foggy on the chest and nodded in the direction of the table.  He looked back at Andrew. “A seven and seven,” he replied, winking and then gesturing toward the front of the room. “We’ll be up there.”

They arrived at the table just before a few girls did, girls who batted their eyes at him one ran her hand along his thigh. He leaned in to whisper “I’m gay,” in her ear, and then pursed his lips apologetically. “He’s available, though,” he said, nodding toward Foggy. “And a lawyer. And, from what I’ve heard, a complete knock out in bed. But he has a tendency to date the high profile women, so I understand if you’re a little intimidated.”

Ryan was enjoying watching her expression shift with each thing he whispered to her, not even sure if Foggy was interested in hooking up, but if he didn’t then at least this girl would think it was because he was a snob and didn’t think she was “high profile” enough. 

He wasn’t looking for a hook up from some girl he met in a bar, and, he figured, these girls would all flock to Andrew the moment he arrived. Truthfully, he wished they wouldn’t loiter around their table, but there didn’t seem many other places for them to sit. “What’s your name?” Ryan asked after a minute. The girl who had once rubbed his leg, who was now making eyes at Foggy, turned to look at Ryan and smiled. “Marissa.”

“Oh.”

When Andrew came back with their drinks – it was another beer for Foggy – he picked up a hint of unexpected sadness. Foggy was in seventh heaven it seemed, happily flirting away, but there was just something a little more somber about Ryan than there had been a few minutes ago. 

“You okay?” he murmured to Ryan as he handed him his drink.

Ryan seemed to shake out of his trance the moment he heard Andrew’s voice and gave a warm smile and a nod. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m good. Blast from the past kind of snuck up on me. Reminder of someone I used to know. But I’m good.” He watched as Marissa caught sight of Andrew, but when she saw him lean in to talk to Ryan, she understood that clearly they had to be together. She looked at Foggy again and then pretended to pout about how there were no more stools left to sit in, then asked if she could sit in his lap.

Ryan laughed.

“Thank you, for the drinks, I mean. And this place… I see why you chose it. What are you going to sing first?”

“What do you want to hear?” Andrew brushed his shoulder against Ryan’s, wanting to do something, anything to help cheer him up.

The girls seemed to have communicated to each other that he and Ryan were a couple, as all of them shifted their attention to Foggy, who could not have been happier with one in his lap and his arm around another, and both of them were actually talking to him. He listened to every word – as best he could – and was absolutely enraptured, entranced by their beauty and already lost in the happiness of getting to know them.

Ryan, for some reason, appreciated the graze, and genuinely felt comforted by it. It had felt like more than just a brush of shoulders, but a way to reach out when reaching out may not have been possible, or if Andrew was worried about it being unwanted. 

“Something… classic. Maybe not Sinatra. Because that might be a little too… You should sing Piano man. I guarantee you the entire bar will sing along. And they will all love you.”

“Okay. But no matter how many people sing along, or how much they love me? I’ll be singing it for you.” Andrew met his eyes as he said it, absolutely sincere. The song was one of the most popular karaoke tunes out there, but it was usually picked up later in the night, when the alcohol started to touch on sorrows that the memory had wrapped in beauty. If this was what Ryan wanted to hear, Andrew intended to give it his all – for Ryan. Not for himself, not to amuse the bar, but because Ryan deserved to hear it sung by a friend who was willing to pour his heart into every word, as if he’d been there in the bar and met all the people the song was about. 

“Hey,” Foggy said, when Andrew was walking past, “sign me up for Yellow Submarine, okay?" 

"You got it, man.” Andrew smiled and slipped away. 

When another group of girls arrived – very late friends – the girls departed, leaving Foggy in a happy daze. “Okay, that? Was amazing. How? How the heck did you just like, make them so happy? They actually wanted to talk to me. You’re magic or something, Ryan." 

Andrew came back, a smile in his eyes, but his expression mild, and he sat with them.

Ryan had truly enjoyed watching Foggy receive all the attention he deserved. He watched Marissa write a phone number, drunkenly, on a bar napkin, but all ten digits were there, so perhaps there would be future fun nights there for Foggy, or perhaps he would just let it go. Either way, Ryan was pleased that it had worked. Besides, he was certain he was really doing the girls as much of a favor as he had been doing for Foggy. He had no doubt Andrew would have shown them a good time too, and Ryan had never let on that Andrew had been his partner, but if that was what they wanted to suspect, and Foggy reaps all the reward for it, then that was even better.

As Andrew returned, Ryan’s eyes lifted to meet his, and he returned a soft smile. "It’s typical, I know. But it… I’ve always liked that song. Thanks.”

Ryan sipped at his drink slowly, looking around at all the people, the variety and the enjoyment so many of them were having, some a little more than others, some, perhaps, needed to skip off to a private room to finish the conversation they were having. But regardless, Ryan enjoyed watching them all. He leaned back to say something to Andrew, and brushed against him, not realizing he was quite so close. “Sorry… I… How long until you’re up? And… What are you drinking? So I can get the next round?”

“Don’t be sorry. I love contact…. and I’m not drinking. I can’t drink anything but – one very, very special drink. But it’s nice to smell the booze, and taste it on the air… Anyway. You’re sweet, but drinks on me, okay? Because you two have had a ridiculous week and deserve to get spoiled a little.” Andrew looked over at him and met his eyes for a moment with a soft smile, then looked back ahead. “I’m three songs after Foggy, who should be up – now." 

Foggy had a blast. He was utterly shameless, sang with enthusiasm, and had people laughing and singing along. He enjoyed himself, even if he did (whale) off key a little too often. When he bounced back down off the stage, he was absolutely elated, and he gave Andrew a big sloppy kiss on the face, then another for Ryan. "Mwa! I love you guys! And this bar. YES!" 

"Foggy, you were great!" 

"Um, hell yes I was!”

When it was Andrew’s turn, the crowd was already cheering the second they recognized the familiar song, Ryan was right about that. But just before the lyrics began, something strange happened: they went silent. Something moved through the audience before Andrew even began to sing, as if the essence of the song was already here, brought to life, slipping through them – and then he was singing, and his voice was silk. Even on a song that had a sad, sweet, whimsical feeling, Andrew’s smooth voice fit beautifully, and then the song was truly alive. 

The applause afterwards was almost deafening for the vampire, who gave a somewhat embarrassed smile and quickly skittered out of the light and back down to the table.

“Right I… forgot. I guess that gives the phrase, next drink is on me, a whole new meaning.” He winked, of all fucking things to do to a man that looked like Andrew, sitting in a bar. But there it was, none the less, and Ryan blushed a little and looked back toward the stage.

Ryan felt happy, truly so, and he couldn’t remember being quite this care free. Foggy was perfect, and the entire bar had loved him. And then Andrew was on stage, the spotlight causing his eyes to shine and his charm to emanate. Apparently, more than Ryan had originally suspected. Because while he’d heard bars quite down for a good song, he had never before seen everybody completely stop talking just for the ability to witness what was happening on that stage.

But gods it was wonderful. And Ryan’s chest hurt a little at how beautiful the moment was. As Andrew joined them again, Ryan feigned offense. “Excuse you. Where the fuck is our kiss? Foggy gave one after his performance. I thought it was customary.”

“Definitely customary,” Andrew said, happy to oblige. The song had been for Ryan, all the sentiment and the beauty, the pain that mixed in with it, the slight traces of bitterness and resignation, everything that came together to make that almost hopeful melody had all been for him, and there was no better way than to seal it with a kiss, right? But unlike Foggy, Andrew’s kiss wasn’t sloppy – just maybe a little too intimate. The kiss was lingering and sweet and loving, and when their lips parted, Andrew smiled before giving him one more short, quick kiss. 

He turned to Foggy and winked at him, blowing one to him, then sat down next to Ryan to watch the next performer, although the DJ was wisely giving people a little bit of time to recover. 

“I should have said earlier, but next drink’s on me is the most beautiful phrase,” Andrew commented, light and cheerful and flirty, dropping his head back a bit so he could look over at Ryan and smile without any possessiveness, without any lust, just with an intimate sort of openness.

The kiss had been more than Ryan had expected, and it had taken a lot – a lot  – of willpower to not lift a hand up to cup Andrew’s face as he sat there with lips attached to his and a largely still quiet bar. The applause had been deafening, and a lot of people had had their eyes hungrily on Andrew after his performance, and Ryan had even spied a few women, and a couple men, as they set their drink to the side, and then lifted themselves off their barstool to head Andrew’s way. They also seemed to fail to notice each other. But with the kiss, all of them had stopped short.

People still managed to pass by and pat Andrew on the shoulder, and Ryan, with warm cheeks and an almost shy smile, lifted a hand to his mouth to try to hide some of the ridiculously happy smile that had planted itself on his face and refused to budge.

How would he retain his tough exterior with the underground-fighter vibe if he went around kissing pretty boys and then blushing over it?

A part of Ryan envied Seth a little for how easy it had been for him. But Ryan also was enjoying his own trail – the things he was learning, the people he was meeting. He liked this place, and felt more at home than he had expected to.

“Thank you, both,” he said after finishing his drink. “For thi–” he hiccuped, then rolled his eyes at himself. Only drunks in movies did that, and he was neither of those things. “For tonight. I’m glad to have you both…” He hiccuped. “you both in my life.” Ryan screwed his mouth up a little. “Have either of you ridden a white horse? And if yes, tell me about it. If no, make up a st–” He hiccuped. “story.”

“What do you want to know about it?” Andrew asked, confused and intrigued. “Is this some weird California thing?" 

"Wait, you actually rode a white horse?" 

"Raised, trained, rode. I wasn’t allowed to have pets, or toys, or, you know, whatever normal kids have. But my horse – for polo – he was sort of my companion to make up for all of that.” There was a smile on his lips and light in his eyes for a moment, until some sad memory stole them away, and his voice grew a little softer. “Alan. Terrible name for such a beauty. He was white as starlight though, just… a very incredible animal… Why – do you ask?”

Ryan sat for a long, silent second, and then gave a smug, very pleased with himself smile. “Because hiccups are afraid of white horses. Thank you.”

Foggy stared at Ryan, completely lost, while Andrew just laughed and shook his head. 

“Wait, wait, stop laughing. I thought Hiccup was the dragon? Why would he be scared of horses?" 

"What? The dragon’s Tooth–”

“Shut up, Gale, no, Hiccup, he’s a dragon, I don’t get it. Ryan. Back me up here.”

Ryan raised his hands and shook his head. “I’m afraid I’m not sure what either of you are referring to. I mean actual hiccups. Those things I had that are now gone. Sorry, Foggy. Next time I’ll totally have your back.”

“Nooooooooo, you dick, I swear, he’s this little black dragon in a cartoon, he’s super cute and fierce and like, rawr!”

“Toothless?”

“Hiccup! Hiccup’s the dragon!” Foggy looked at them like they were little lost children.

Andrew bit his lip and grinned.

Ryan spared a conspiratorial glance with Andrew, and then held up his hands. “I’m… wait. I’m wrong. I’m sure. I think toothless was the name of the squire…”

“There was a squire? What squire? That pulled the sword out of the stone?" 

"Okay, Foggy, you had two beers, are you okay?" 

"Dude, I think I’ve just watched way, way too many cartoons. I accidentally did a parental lock thing on my own Netflix account and it was a few days before I could fix it, so all I could watch was kids’ movies and… yeah. It was… I’m all overloaded. Hey, Andrew, wanna take Ryan with you to Europe?" 

Andrew hadn’t been expecting the question and he looked surprised, but got over it quickly enough and turned to Ryan. "If you want to come, I’d love company, I hate traveling alone when it’s not for work… but I’m not really – planning on going anywhere that’s a – very exciting scene. The first few nights won’t be bad, though; I’m flying into Paris and staying two nights, then moving on east… There’s an old castle I need to visit in Romania, but it’s… a pretty small town, not really any sort of night life… and then I’m going down to Montenegro." 

"I used to think that place only existed in Bond movies.”

Ryan was laughing too hard, and then the laughter stopped. He was about to tell Andrew to please not feel obligated to accept, that he was going to see if Andrew wanted the company when it wouldn’t be implied that he was, perhaps, at all impaired by the drinks he’d consumed.

But all of that was cut off by Andrew quickly accepting.

“I… would enjoy that,” Ryan stated simply. “I don’t need a night life to be impressed and content. I’m not high maintenance at all. Just… decent company and a bed without spiders. That’s all I ask for.”

“No spiders, check. When do you have time off? I know you’re just on a vacation now, I don’t want to get you in any trouble with your employers…”

“I… is there wifi? Because my computer has autocad and I can work from just about anywhere. This week I just very specifically told them I wouldn’t be answering emails or calls. It’s pissed them off.”

“Not where I’m going… I’m not sure if there is any in the nearest town, but it might be worth a shot, if you wanted to split apart while I go to the castle… you could hang out in town? If you really want to go though, man, I’ll buy your tickets, that’s not a problem. I’ve just… spent years going on work trips, always alone, and having someone along… no strings attached, nothing, you know, no sordid expectations… it’d be nice.”

Ryan nodded. “I can figure out the work thing, I’m sure. The program doesn’t run on wifi. But the emails to be sent back and forth would. So I would just need to make a trip in to send out a few correspondences. And then I’m all yours. Or… I mean I would be free." 

He smiled awkwardly and finished the second glass he hadn’t remembered being set in front of him. "But you’re serious about this? I… have only met you once before, at Matt’s, the day I came home from the hospital. You seem very sure that I’m not some hardened criminal.”

“I mean… you know what I am, right?” Andrew met Ryan’s eyes. “Whoever you are, Ryan, whatever you really want out of life… I’m not scared to get to know you. As long as you’re not afraid of me.”

Ryan cleared his throat. “Labels have been tossed around a lot this week. And I don’t think I care much either way.” He smiled softly and nodded. “Definitely not afraid.”

Andrew lit up. “Are you – seriously – you’ll really go with me? Thank you, man! Thank you!”

Ryan nodded. “I… yes. Really. If you’ll really have me as company. I’m too quiet and broody and don’t talk first thing in the mornings. But this sounds fun. And I would like to have something that’s just mine.”

“I don’t know what to say…” He looked down for a moment, then back at Ryan’s eyes. “Thank you. It means a lot that you’re willing to go. And if at any point you feel – weird or uncomfortable or homesick, whatever, no hard feelings, I’ll get you an early flight back.”

Ryan lifted a glass in salute and set it back down, realizing that it was empty. “Will either of you be gracing the stage again tonight?”

“Want another? And only if you’ve got another song request." 

Foggy, however, didn’t answer, as he had fallen asleep. 

Andrew poked him, then smiled. "I’m guessing he’s not going back up.”

“Yeah. Maybe we should get him back home. I’m good on drinks. Think a cab would be better than trying to guide him back to the train station?”

“Probably.” Andrew glanced over at the bartender, who nodded to him, so he turned back to Foggy and stood up, scooping Foggy up. “Come on, Fogmaster,” Andrew murmured softly, then nodded for Ryan to lead the way out. 

—-

After making Foggy drink some water, Andrew tucked him into bed. “You sweet, sweet lightweight,” he whispered before kissing Foggy’s temple. “Sweet dreams…” He shut the door quietly, then came out to meet Ryan in the living room. “If you need a place to stay tonight…” He picked up his shirt and tie and draped them over his arm. “You’re more than welcome to come to my place. Which isn’t me trying to pick you up… I just… I don’t want you to feel like – a leftover. Because you’re not.”

Ryan nodded, and yawned. “Whatever the reason for your offer, I would appreciate the place to sleep. Thanks.”

He could tell he was getting tired. All sentences were coming out shorter and shorter. The need for explanations and long monologues had long since passed, and Ryan followed Andrew out the door.

“And thank you for tonight. I truly enjoyed myself.”

“Me, too.” Andrew smiled and stopped him in the hall. “Do something for me, okay? Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and just… relax.”

Ryan smirked. “Okay, but if this is how you hit on people, I think it could maybe use some work.”

Not really knowing what to expect, Ryan swayed some when they landed at Andrew’s place and his stomach rolled just a little, but he made it without throwing up.

“I make a point of not asking too many questions. But that was… kind of amazing.”

“Hey, we’re literally going to Transylvania because my predecessor wants me to do some… weird thing with our castle, so… better get used to the freaky vampire shit while you can, right?" 

Andrew’s home was ridiculous. It was on the top floor, and was huge, wide open spaces, white marble floors, elegant decor. There were a few lamps lit, giving a soft gleam to the room, but the lights of the city could be seen beautifully through the exterior wall, which was all glass. 

"Want some pajamas? And make yourself at home. I’ll take the couch, you can have the bed, it’s down here…” He headed down a short hall.

“There’s… I mean… if we’re going to be in small hotel rooms together or whatever else… There’s no need for you to take the couch unless you absolutely want to,” Ryan replied, the last couple words were spoken around a yawn. 

“This place… I think even the Cohens would be impressed with it. It’s gorgeous here.” Ryan stood in the doorway to the room, leaning against the frame. “Thank you, again, for everything you’ve done for me and Seth this week. And I do know you’ve been involved a great deal more than perhaps you’ve let on. So, thank you. I’m glad I got to know you.”

“I’m glad, too.” Andrew smiled and kissed Ryan on the cheek, then slipped past him to get out pajamas. He left them on the bed for Ryan, then said, “I’m going to shower… I’ll be quick though, if you want to use it, too.” Ryan looked tired enough to just be curled up in bed and sleeping already, Andrew thought, so he wasn’t really expecting him to want to shower. Still, he was quick about it, and he put on his sleep pants in the bathroom, then came back out and crawled into bed and sighed happily as he slipped in between the sheets.

Ryan didn’t care enough about taking a shower. Though, considering he was sleeping in someone else’s bed, perhaps he should have. But by the time Andrew finished in the bathroom, Ryan was curled up in bed, only opening his eyes sleepily as Andrew slid in beside him. 

“Hi,” he said, his voice thick with gravel. He cleared his throat and tried again. But the second time it only came out as a whisper. Ryan huffed and smiled, then scooted closer to Andrew. “Hi,” he finally managed.

“Hi.” Andrew smiled. Around the apartment, the lights turned off one by one, until only the gleam coming in from the glittering city illuminated the room. “I didn’t think you’d still be awake.” He tucked an arm under his pillow and wiggled around a bit to get more comfortable.

Ryan shook his head and buried himself under his pillow. “Not awake,” he grumbled. “Totally not awake.”

“Go to sleep, Ryan…” Andrew laughed quietly and easily, then turned around so his back was to the other, thinking that it might bother Ryan to feel he was being watched. He and his brother seem so… good. I hope they’ll be alright… I hope that, if there are any more tricks or traps from Elektra, they’ll still be safe… Somehow.

It didn’t take much before Ryan was fast asleep in the overly comfortable bed with a man who maybe smelled a little too good. He gravitated toward warmth in his sleep, and woke up pressed close to Andrew. When he opened his eyes, it took a second to adjust to his surroundings, which seemed to be different every morning, and then casually rolled back and stretched.

Andrew made a quiet little sound of protest when the warm body rolled away from him, but he woke a moment later. Demonstrating that he was, in fact, a grown adult, Andrew turned over to look at Ryan, then slunk down under the blankets. “You were so warm,” he protested, although he didn’t sound serious – and really wasn’t speaking that clearly, considering his head was under sheet, blanket, and a pillow.

Ryan smirked, pulled the blankets further over his head, and then used one leg to pull himself closer again. It wasn’t that he understood Andrew’s words of protest, so much as the sound of them. He quickly found his spot again, where it was the warmest in the bed, and hummed his reluctance to move from there ever again.

Eventually, Andrew stuck his head up. Thank God for Saturdays, he thought, and sighed in contentment. “You’re like a cat. Quiet, warm, nice, potentially a little scary… mostly non-verbal…” He reached over, found Ryan’s head, and scratched lightly behind his ear.

“You say that, but I’ve never been one to purr,” Ryan muttered, curling tighter into the blankets. He rolled a couple times, making sure to take the sheets with him. “But you’re right. Cats are dicks.”

“Aw man, yeah they are. Jerk.” Andrew snorted and pulled Ryan’s pillows away, making a nest of them around himself since he couldn’t have any other bedding, apparently. “Why, oh why didn’t I adopt a dog? Hindsight, man.”

“Hmm. Sorry. I think Matt got the puppy,” Ryan mumbled from deep within the blankets. “To be fair, though. I have a tendency to only like one person at a time and if you’re lucky you’ll wake up with my butt in your face.”

He laughed and buried his face in the pillows, then hopped up and stretched before wandering over to his closet. “I’m going to go work in the living room for a bit, but sleep in all you need, man.” Andrew slipped out of his pajamas and into jeans and a t-shirt, then wandered quietly out of the room, not wanting to bother Ryan any further, especially if he had a hangover. 

When Andrew finished, he sent the completed files off, then went out onto the balcony to really enjoy the rain. It was coming down gently, with the clouds so low that they were brushing around some of the buildings. Up here, the air still tasted fresh and clean; he loved it.

Ryan hadn’t gone back to sleep, but he didn’t get out of bed either. He listened for a while as Andrew worked, thought about the night they’d all shared, and finally untangled himself from the sheet. He went and took a quick shower, made the bed, dressed, and finally walked out, only to find Andrew out on the balcony. 

Ryan walked out, his back against the windows, fucking thankful he couldn’t see down below. “The weather is great today.”

“Gotta love that liquid sunshine..” He ran his hand over the stone bannister, soaked with rain, then turned back to Ryan. “How’s your head?” Andrew leaned on the doorframe, hands in his pockets, watching him.

“Oh, I feel fine. Hangovers stopped being something to brag about when I was in my early twenties. Now I typically keep it to two drinks, and I take my time with them.” His eyes turned to Andrew, meeting the others gaze, and his expression softened. “Thanks. For letting me crash here.”

He nodded. “Anytime. Company is always, always welcome… and I know you’ve sort of been – bounced around a little since you got here, so hopefully adding one more place wasn’t too… too much.” He looked out at the rain, then back at Ryan. “Can I ask what’s on your mind?”

“The heights,” Ryan answered a little sheepishly, glancing out again. I can’t see the ground, but I still know we’re up fucking high.“ He wasn’t asking to go in, just making an observation that if Andrew could hear his heart racing from over there, that was likely why.

"I tried to tell Seth I could just get a hotel, but before I ever could, everybody else has been nice enough to offer their homes. So, I really can’t complain.”

“Are you okay, though?” Andrew’s voice softened as he asked it, and he realized he wasn’t sure just what exactly he was worried about – just that he was. It felt like there was something permanently unsettled in Ryan, something strange and almost unfinished feeling under all his calm. No matter how cool or humorous demeanor, the thing was there – whatever it was. Andrew just hoped that he was misreading it, or even imagining it.

Ryan seemed to forget entirely about what rested beyond the balcony ledge, and he met Andrew’s gaze straight on. He smiled softly. “I am… I’m sorry that I’m not… overly talkative. I’ll happily tell you anything you want to know. I’m just… people aren’t typically interested in my backstory.” He didn’t mean for that to sound sad. He was okay with being quiet and keeping to himself. He had Seth. A few friends back home. A good job and a comfortable life. He had everything he’d never grown up with.

At first, Andrew was quiet. Then, with a little frown, he shook his head. “Man…” Stepping forward, he pulled Ryan into a hug. It was absolutely gentle, fueled by nothing but compassion. “I’ll pry later. When we’re laying on – some rooftop of Castle Dracula or something. I do care about your backstory. Who you are. Who you’ve been.” He rubbed a hand over Ryan’s back, the one movement saying love as clearly as it could ever be offered, then stepped away, giving him back his space. 

“But you don’t need to be sorry for being quiet… I just… worry about people too much, I guess. You don’t need to talk if you’re not feeling it – all I want is to know that you’re okay… and if you’re ever not? Just… tell me whatever you need, okay? Even if it’s,” the brightness seemed to come back to his eyes, and his smile returned, “a one-word reply to an emotional moment. Like breakfast or coffee or whatever.”

“Hmm,” Ryan hummed, as if that itself was some kind of an answer. A playful smile tilted his lips and he seemed to relax completely. “Do you even keep stuff like that here? Cater to all the souls you lure up to your trap with your bright eyes and perfect smile?”

His grin broadened and he looked down, as if, for some reason, he needed to hide the expression. “I think I’m good for now, thank you.”

“Nope.” Andrew looked back out at the city as a few gulls swooped bye. “But there’s a really amazing diner at the corner that does deliveries, so… if you get hungry – I mean not that you have to stay, of course. If you want to take off or anything, just because I am a sucker for company doesn’t mean you have to be, especially with a relative stranger.”

“Was that a pun?”

He looked back over, eyes wide and confused. “What? No. Sorry, I’m sort of lame with the humor most of the time – still trying to figure that out.” Andrew flashed a quick but brilliant apologetic smile, then looked back at the rain.

Ryan laughed. “Sorry… Seth is… obsessed with puns. So I see them everywhere.” He shrugged. “I don’t mind staying for a while, if you’re sure you’re okay with it? I mean. We’re really not complete strangers. You did kiss me last night, after all.”

“True.” Andrew blushed, but he was smiling again. “It was a pretty good kiss, from what I remember… and I’m totally sure. As long as you want to be here, I’d really like you to be around.”

“It was a damn good kiss,” Ryan corrected, and then seemed to remember himself, and pink washed over his cheeks.

“Before this fog clears, I think I’m going to head inside. There’s no need for you to see me afraid of heights in all my glory.”

“Plus, if we keep standing here and blushing, we might burn the clouds off too quick.” Andrew grinned, then opened the door for Ryan and followed him in. “Is it okay to ask about the heights…?”

“Why I’m afraid of them? No idea. Irrational fear. Got on a Ferris wheel once to try to get a girl to go out with me. We got caught at the top. Pretty sure someone paid the guy off. I don’t know. They’ve always made me nervous.”

“You think someone paid him off to fuck with you? Or to give you guys privacy up there?” He shut and locked the door, then went over and perched on the back of a couch.

“Oh. The latter. I don’t think there was ill intent there.” Ryan rolled his neck and shoulders and then sat down on the couch, leaning enough on the arm that he could comfortably look at Andrew. “Am I keeping you from doing work?” He swallowed thickly and pushed back the thoughts that came to his mind. Then he huffed and looked again at Andrew. “So. I actually think I should be honest about something, particularly before you invite me to stay another night, and definitely before you invite me across the world with you. But I… find you attractive. And I’m not… I don’t want to find my… well, my Matt, like Seth did. I’m not looking. I don’t need… anyway. I don’t want to be the perverted asshole who never said the thing and ends up making you super uncomfortable later down the line.” He exhaled in a huff and then looked down at his hands.

Smooth, Ryan.

“I’m not – entirely sure what all of that meant? But what I think I understood is… you’re attracted to me, but you don’t want me to think that you’re – looking for a life partner right now, or that you want to have meaningless sex… You want me to be comfortable, and you want to know that you’re not abusing my trust or hospitality in any way… Is that – if I misunderstood, please tell me?" 

As almost always, Andrew wasn’t mocking, but was entirely sincere.

"I think… hell, I don’t even know. I think what I was trying to say is that I find you attractive. And yes, I didn’t want to abuse your kindness or hospitality by… letting you undress in front of me without knowing. Or that maybe you’ll be afraid that I’m just jealous or looking for what Seth has, and I’m turning to the first kind person. Or… yes… what you said. I think is what I was trying to say.”

Andrew nodded. “That’s… really sweet of you to tell me. I appreciate it a lot. And honestly, I find you attractive too – and even if… you know, nothing sexual ends up happening between us, if you like looking, I don’t mind if you do…" 

He hesitated for a moment, trying to think of how best to put it, then went on. "You don’t seem like someone who uses people. And even if you were using me, even if you were jealous or lonely or just – really wanting some kindness in your life, that you had no intention of keeping… honestly, that’s kind of okay, too. Nobody’s perfect. Ever. You don’t have to – be everything you are right away. If that makes sense. You don’t… need to bare your soul or anything for me to trust that you’re good. The trust is something I just give – you don’t have to prove that you deserve it.” He looked down at his hands. “Sorry if that was… an overly long answer. I should have just said thank you, huh?”

Though maybe it was a bit much more of an answer than he was expecting, Ryan appreciated it, and he seemed to relax with each word Andrew said.

“The way you replied was perfect,” he said, resting his head back. “And thanks, for being cool about it. But you don’t have to indulge me at all. I just didn’t want you to think I was… lurking, or something. And then find out about it in Paris and have to kick my ass out at the louvre.”

Andrew laughed and shook his head. “Honestly, trying not to flirt with you too much is probably going to be the problem for me.”

“…. You mean like saying if I’m lucky I’ll wake up with your butt in my face? Because I think that’s my line.” He smiled. “What I mean is, don’t stress about it. If I ever get uncomfortable, I’ll let you know.”

“Okay. And same goes. And hey, butts in faces aren’t always a bad thing.” He twitched an eyebrow and grinned, looking a little shameless for once.

“Indeed. Listen, you weren’t wrong. I am the worst kind of cat. I hog beds and invade personal space and demand attention if I’m particularly bored. Considered coming in here earlier and laying across your laptop while you were working. Just because.” Ryan’s eyes were light, and he had shifted even more to face Andrew, allowing himself to stare for a long, drawn out moment.

“Okay, but I love giving someone attention when they want it, and anytime I’m working from home? It’s not a time-crunch thing. I like my job, and it’s been my life for – way too long. So it’s what I know. It’s a habit. But babe, any time you want to distract me, you go right ahead.”

Ryan felt better after getting this bit of honesty out of the way. He didn’t like secrets or liars and besides. He figured if Andrew really was that interested, they could potentially have something casual over the duration of their trip. 

“I’m going to go get my wallet, because I think I do want to try that cafe. And the weather is pleasant enough that I don’t mind getting out in it.” He stood and took a step, seeming as if he were going to slide in front of Andrew, but he stopped and leaned in to offer a soft and inviting kiss. When he pulled away, he smiled. “Yeah. I was right. Last night was a damn good kiss.” He followed it up with one more quick, almost chaste kiss, then disappeared off into the bedroom.

Fuck. It was all about the attitude, and Ryan had it. Ryan was going to be a problem. A very big, very serious problem, if Andrew wanted to even try to pretend at having any cool whatsoever. That guy was the definition of a fox.