#hopefully peeps on tumblr will actually read a warning before clicking on read more

[axvwriter]

ramblings

I'm nearly done with a comic I'm drawing. Just one panel left to do but of course I've decided I want to at least full color the character in it so that's slowing me down. If I didn't choose to do that, it would have been done by now.

I've used my chibi style for a good amount of it. My chibi style is supposed to be a simplified version of a character, but I can't help but still try to get a majority of details down. I also can't decide how I want to draw belts for my chibi style. I'd prefer not to draw them at all but my perfectionism doesn't like me doing that.

I usually don't draw ears at all but some of the characters have uniquely-enough shaped ears for me to feel like I should draw them. I can't even try to tell myself it's because they have earrings as I've ignored the other character who also wears earrings. I may or may not have also forgotten to draw earrings in one panel, but the ear angle has me confused so I don't even want to try to figure it out.

Been sharing my progress with a discord pal just to have extra pair of eyes to catch if anything looks real odd and to have a second opinion on some stuff. They told me I'm getting better at drawing humans which makes me real happy! I get so caught up trying to get the anatomy right that I don't feel like I'm doing a good job at trying to do different body types. Though maybe getting one body style right will act as a good foundation to build onto different body types.

I could have had this comic done way sooner if I hadn't let it sit untouched for a few days. I blame my slight annoyances with my current setup. I'm thinking of looking into regular tablets and downloading an art program onto one since fancy wireless art tablets are super expensive and some reviews have stated them to be real fragile too. Like I'm getting a potential life expectancy of a year or maybe just a month. I think those were the low-star reviews for the wired screen art tablets too.

I want to be able to do digital art on a couch instead of trying to find a comfy sitting position at a computer that doesn't put my legs to sleep. So I'm hoping a tablet with a stylus will be the way to go. One discord pal did suggest using my phone, but I've realized that with how often I use refs to make sure I'm never forgetting a detail, there wouldn't be much screen room for me to actually draw. Anyone use regular tablets for art? What tablet brand is it? I'm going to look into this type of stuff myself, but I wouldn't mind hearing from anyone who actually has experience using a regular tablet for art.

Oh does anyone know of any visually simple art programs such as Artrage? Other programs tend to overwhelm me with all the options and what not on the screen. Artrage is rather simple at first glance so that's nice, but I'm not sure if its price is really worth it. Like I don't use much of its unique(?) features so I don't feel like I'm using it to its full value? So a cheaper option would be nice as I rather not spend so much money on something I use like... two of the tools? pencils? what is it even called...

[jaimistoryteller]

Jaimi’s Update

3/9/19

Hello Folks

I feel I should apologize to before I actually write the update. This won’t be all that positive or cheery, mostly because I am in the middle of a lovely and massive spiral set off by a combination of factors and a single person pushing it over the edge. 

I am slowly going through all the tagged stuff, I apologize that my health is making it take longer then I’d like but if you tagged me, and tumblr sent me an email, I will get to your thing!

Good Things First

I’ve only got 200ish emails left to go through? Let’s call that a good thing. 

You peeps who have shared the Unexpected Meeting Kickstarter - you all are wonderful. It might not feel like you are doing anything, but you really are! Thank you so much! i’m not tagging you here on accountability of this is a mostly depressing post, but there will be a thank you post with you tagged eventually!

Any other good stuff? No, not that I can think of. 

In the Middle Things

I’m alive? Let’s go with that, as I can’t think of anything. Of course, positive and neutral things are hard when one’s brain is on the bloody attack. 

Bad Things

I had two good-ish days, I wasn’t happy, but I wasn’t bad, of course I am now paying for it by being in a massive fucking spiral. Not just a little spiral but a huge ‘hey, not currently suicidal but it wouldn’t take much to push me into being suicidal’ spiral. 

It’s a bunch of little things adding up to screw with me. 

The Unexpected Meeting Kickstarter has been stuck at $246 for a week. Which, there is still 22 days left, there’s time, but with my spiral going on, and seeing the amount of hits but no one doing anything using two different hit counters? Making my depression so much worse. Really, if each person that clicked on it pledged a single dollar, it would already be funded. 

My internet is now shut off, so I am using borrowed internet. I went from glitchy and needs fixed, to glitchy and barely works because I can’t get a stable signal. that’s $250 I don’t have, before the $100 to get the damned thing fixed. So. Yes. Not helping the spiral the fact it turns on and off regularly. 

My pain levels are through the roof. Today’s a burning day for pain, I actually wrote a little thing about it but it isn’t all that happy, still you are welcome to read Types of Pain if you’d like, warning for ableism and suicidal ideation. 

Then there’s the abled body peep in my life, pissed off because I am fighting through the pain to try and figure out some way to fucking survive. Sorry, I can’t be the Jaimi of before the accident, the one who worked full time and went to school full time. 

Right now I am $20 short on Winston’s next payment, though, hopefully that changes as I have applied for a few ghost writing jobs. However, with the way shit’s been, well, I doubt I will get them.

Other & Past Updates

I will be putting the links on it’s own post since this one is more bad then anything. 

3/1/9

2/14/19

1/24/19

1/16/19

1/5/19

12/27/17 & 12/28/18

12/22/18

12/19/18

12/6/18 & 12/8/18