#hoping to get it done this weekend but we gotta compile about four years of thoughts into a cohesive post.

[dyad-of-fate]

Are Thorne and Kestrel's character designs done yet?

You have... no idea how hard this made us laugh, thank you X'D

And for the most part Kestrel is done, yes~ The only thing left for them is a few tattoos, and those will just evolve as I get to them. But since these are on Kestrel's back (most likely), I'm just calling them done. Really the only big thing I want to draw is Kestrel with their hair down but I know what that looks like.

Now Thorne's design may just continue to evolve and change until we get further in the story- or maybe it will just have small changes until we actually finish haha. But this is the most up to date version and there are key features that are locked in place: long and lanky, delicate, lil snaggle tooth fang poking from his mouth, monochrome pallet with dark skin, kinky-curly hair, heterochromia with one dark eye and a light eye, and freckles. His patterning may change a few more times, tattoos are a hope but those aren't designed, we knoe he has a few accessories but not sure what exactly yet, he has family scarification (cultural thing) but those aren't designed yet- we want to do our research and make sure we don't use a real culture's practices incorrectly... but yeah! Yarne is pleased with what his face and body type looks like. And he actually looks like his mom and dad's kid now, so that's a nice bonus.

Here, enjoy their canon height difference. For context, Kestrel's about 6 feet tall (183 cm). Which means their dog half is about the size of a large pony. Thorne's actually not terribly short for a wolf :)

Oh I guess that one thing will be redrawn on Kestrel, now that I'm looking at this. That shirt is not in line with the fashion of the Wall, so they probably wouldn't wear that unless they made it... overall fashion in story is more like 1920's meets 1940's - 50's era (from various places around the world). Clothing design isn't a strong suit though, so I just draw them in whatever my heart desires at the time XD

Thorne's jacket is canon though, it's his dad's old coat.

[oscars-wifeyyy]

Chapter 7 (The Innocent)

Now it was Thanksgiving break that was filled with nights with Monse and days with Oscar then the crew. Thanksgiving was obviously spent with family until the sun went down and everyone met at Ruby's place. Everyone was walking and having a good time, but Elizabeth knew that Monse and Ruby were still hurting from seeing their loved one with another person.

"Where's Mario? I was hoping to see him," Jamal asked.

Ruby smirked, "he went with his new bougie girlfriend to Nevada,"

"Instead of coming home?" Monse asked.

"Monse, he is in the bone zone with his new girl," Elizabeth chuckled.

"True,"

"Can you pass the tres leches?" Olivia asked, "my mom makes the best tres leches for my birthday. Guess not this year,"

"Don't say that," Monse comforted, "maybe your folks will be home before your birthday,"

"In a week? I don't think so," Olivia looked down.

"Wait," Ruby paused, "your quince is in a week? And you didn't tell us?! Mom, dad! Olivia's quince is in a week!"

"It's not a big deal," Olivia tried to tell Ruby.

Ruby's family came to the main room and surrounded the girl, "is this true?"

"Olivia, don't you worry about a thing. I can get my shift covered next weekend and we can have it here next Saturday," Ruby's dad said.

There were cheers coming from everyone except for Olivia, who went to hide in her room. Elizabeth nudged Cesar, pointing towards her room. The two went to the room to look inside and saw Olivia crying, but she quickly wiped them away when she heard them coming in. They moved to sit next to her when Monse opened the door again to join them, but soon after all three pulled each other in a hug.

"You don't have to do this," Olivia sniffled.

"We're not doing anything. This is for me," Monse smiled at the crying girl.

"And me," Cesar and Elizabeth said in sync.

"We felt the need to hug. Now accept the hug, damn it," Elizabeth chuckled with everyone.

"I can't believe I'm about to have my first birthday without my parents and it's my quince," Olivia wiped under her nose, "it's so ironic. I mean, since I was able to walk, my mother has driven me crazy talking about my quinceañera. Trying recipes, cutting magazines, making playlists. My dad, practicing our waltz so he'd have it down on the day. He's been practicing for years. Years!"

"That's a lot of dancing," Monse said.

"Yeah. He has no rhythm. Like none. So, my feet are shredded, all in the name of my mother's obsession, which I used to pray to stop. But now it has...I miss it," Olivia finished.

Ruby walked in, "what's going on?"

"Nothing. You just totally and completely devastated Olivia by suggesting she have a quince," Monse said.

The short friend walked over to the hug pile and joined in, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to rub salt on the wound,"

"It's not your fault. I haven't seen my parents in months and I've barely talked to them. It's just a nightmare situation,"

Ruby stood up, "which is why you should have a party!"

"Ruby, she doesn't want to celebrate. Are you even listening?" Monse looked at Ruby in disbelief.

"I am," Ruby rolled his eyes, "what I'm hearing is how important this party is to her mom,"

"I can't do this without her," Olivia said.

"But that's why you have to. You're not betraying your mom to have a quince if she's not here, but you would be betraying her to not have one because she's not here," Ruby stood in front of his friends' eyes, "not after all her planning,"

"I side with Ruby on this one," Elizabeth shrugged.

"I never thought of it that way,"

"Because I'm good at making people understand the right side of an argument," Ruby gloated.

"Or annoying them to submission," Monse retorted, high-fiving Elizabeth.

"Do you have any idea about what you want?" Ruby asked Olivia.

The next day came around and there was a squad meeting at Ruby's, but Ruby said to bring a computer or a phone so Elizabeth just brought her phone. Everyone was present except for Olivia and Ruby, but Ruby walked into the dining room with a headset and a huge binder, slammed it onto the table.

"Everyone please open your e-devices and find the email I sent titled 'winning'. Find it? Good. after copious hours of searching through Olivia's quincespirations, I've compiled the best ideas on a Pinterest page on the link below her head shot," Ruby informed.

"Where's Olivia?" Cesar asked.

"The princesa doesn't need to be bothered by details. Now, anyone else have a dumb question? Huh? Good. before we really get going, I'd like to remind you that we're not just friends and family, we're damas and chambelanes in Olivia's court of honor, which means being honorable and dedicated," Ruby looked at everyone, "take a look at our mandatory rehearsal schedule and..." his phone began ringing, "excuse me, I have to take this. Ruby's Fancy Festivities,"

Elizabeth had gotten a call so she looked at her phone and saw Oscar's contact name. Quickly excusing herself, she went to the backyard and accepted the call.

"Wassup? Everything ok?" Elizabeth asked.

"Whatchu doing right now?" Oscar disregarded her questions.

"At Ruby's for a meeting for Olivia's quince. Look like I'm a dama too," Elizabeth sighed.

Oscar started laughing so Elizabeth hung up the phone and went back inside to go back to the group to see Ruby done with his call and contemplating something.

"...think the twins can pull it?" Ruby asked.

"No," Cesar looked at Ruby weird.

"Fine. Moving on. The following are individual responsibilities," Ruby said.

"I'll handle music," Cesar said.

"I'll handle the baking," Elizabeth said.

"Great minds think alike, compas. Monse, given your expert penmanship, you're gonna do the invitations,"

"No," Monse rolled her eyes.

"Use cardstock," Ruby turned to Jamal, "Jamal, you can cater. And by you, I mean your dad,"

"How many people?" Jamal asked.

"Well, there's us, and then the whole block, and...300," Ruby said nonchalantly.

"300 people?!?" Jamal raised his voice.

"You're right. Better make that 350,"

"Jamal will do the flowers. I will do the food," Abuelita said from the kitchen.

Elizabeth fell asleep on the table, but it was interrupted when Ruby woke her up and told her to go to the living room for dance practice. She stood from her seat and made her way to Monse and Olivia, staring at Ruby.

"He's eccentric," Olivia tried to give Ruby the benefit of the doubt.

"Not eccentric," Elizabeth yawned, "more like quincecabra. Anyways, I'm out, I gotta go to the restaurant,"

She walked out of the house and into the red Impala that was waiting with the guy that was so hung up on her without even realizing it. She greeted him with a hug and a quick kiss on the cheek as they began their short drive to the restaurant. Once they got there, Oscar walked her in and went back out to waste four hours since the things that had to be done were done.

Oscar walked around the area and noticed the looks of fear directed towards him because of his appearance, but he reveled in the fear-filled eyes. A store caught his eye so he went inside and looked around, not caring about the security guards that watched him closely. Something shined in his eye so he turned his attention and saw a simple necklace with an O dangling on it so he called one salesman over and pointed at the necklace.

"How much for that?" Oscar asked.

"Oh," the salesman looked dumbfounded because of the simplicity of it, "that's 300, sir,"

Oscar nodded and took out the three hundreds from his wallet, handing it over to the guy, "that cover it?"

"Y-yes, sir," he fumbled with the box and put in the necklace before pushing it into the cholo's hand, "h-have a good d-day, sir,"

"You too," Oscar walked out and smirked as he went out of the store and back to Elizabeth's job.

He waited for another twenty minutes until the familiar girl came walking out with a huge smile on her face. She jumped into the Impala and they went off to go back to Freeridge, but Oscar had felt his stomach drop nervously. The usually hard cholo had taken glances towards the younger girl who was humming to the music playing on the radio so he just went for it.

"Elizabeth, be my ruca. For real like be official, baby," Oscar cleared his throat while facing the freeway, "I don't care about my strikes, I just want you to be mine,"

"Oscar..." Elizabeth sighed, "you might be fine with the risk of getting caught, but I'm not. I won't be the reason Cesar doesn't have you with him again. I want to be with you, but I gotta turn eighteen first. I'm about to turn seventeen and that's not even close to legal age, Oscar,"

"It's my choice too, Eli," Oscar flared his nose in anger, "I want to take that chance to be with you! We can be careful and keep it under wraps,"

"Then are you willing to not be able to go on dates and just stay in?" Elizabeth stared at the older man, "I mean it, Scar. You can't flaunt me around at least not publicly."

Oscar nodded, "done. I can do that,"

"Then yeah, I'll be yours," Elizabeth had a small smile.

Oscar grinned and grabbed her hand to kiss her knuckles, causing Elizabeth to blush. She also moved to their joined hands to repeat the action and rest their hands on her thigh. Their moment was interrupted by Oscar's phone ringing.

"Hermanito," Oscar answered the phone.

"Oscar! I just got pulled up on by LaTrelle. Monse's with me right now," Cesar freaked out on the phone.

"Where are you?" Oscar seethed.

"At the bodega,"

"Be there in 10. Stay there," Oscar hung up with a tight face, but slightly relaxed when Elizabeth took his hand with both of hers and kissed the top of his hand.

10 minutes later, Oscar and Elizabeth were at the bodega and Elizabeth immediately got out to hug Cesar and Monse, glad that they were alright. Everybody was too scared to even notice that the two unlikely friends came to the scene together.

[lisatelramor]

If you accept requests can you please write some AoKai with Aoko finding out Kids identity and confronting him about it I love your fics on FF :)

so, to answer your question, yes, yes I do take requests, though it is purely up to the whims of my brain whether or not anything gets written from them so I don’t explicitly advertise that. You’re lucky, it bit this time ;) Have some AoKai, Anon

Gotta Spend SomeTime, Love

Aoko made a note in the notebook she kept under her bed.Another one for the left column. Aoko smoothed a finger over the lines,spanning several pages now. Kaito is Kid.Kaito is not.

She started the list when her dad first suspected Kaito wasKid. One thing in each column that day—the left: Kaito replaced himself with a dummy (I can tell the difference from mybest friend Kaito), the right: Itisn’t possible to get from the amusement park to the heist site and back in thelength of that movie. The left column had the added: Kaito makes the impossible a hobby. She’d added to it ever sincethen, bit by bit. Evidence for, evidence against. Hakuba Saguru’s accusationwas in the left column, all the times Kaito got into a heist site because hewas her friend, Kaito’s skills with sleight of hand and acrobatics. The othercolumn held the time Hakuba handcuffed Kaito to him—that was the real Kaitothat time, she was sure—and how he tried to help her dad by pointing out blindspots when he was asked, how Kaito was afraid of fish so he’d never have beenpart of those heists with the submarine or the boat.

If Aoko could pick her worst trait, it was that her emotionsclouded her thoughts. She reacted, always reacted, first and thought second. Itwas a trait she shared with her father. It was a trait she’d had since she wasa small child, jumping to conclusions without proof and her mother used to holdher hands and talk her through it, piecing together why her conclusion was orwasn’t right. It had almost been a game then, a puzzle, pretending to be apolice officer sometimes like her dad.

When it came down to it, Aoko was and had always been apolice officer’s daughter.

Aoko’s finger stopped on Kaitoloves Kid which she’d written on both halves of the list. On the one hand,Kaito was a magic geek and Kid’s heists were the sort of spectacle that Kaitoloved. On the other… Kaito was just enough of an egoist to join his own fanclub.

He dad knocked on the door and Aoko flipped the notebook toold school notes in the back. He glanced at it as he poked his head in. “Justchecking in. Working on homework?”

“Yeah.” Aoko smiled. “Almost done though. There’s someleftovers from dinner in the fridge if you haven’t eaten yet.”

He smiled back, so worn and tired. He didn’t sleep enough.He probably didn’t eat enough, or at least not healthy things. Kid had himrunning around at all hours and hardly ever home. “Thanks, Aoko. You’re a goodkid. Don’t stay up too late.”

“I won’t.”

The door closed again. Aoko’s smile slid off her face. Shewasn’t a good kid, though, was she? If she was, she wouldn’t be hiding thisnotebook.

She flipped back to her list. At the top of the most recentpage she’d written Aoko loves Kaitoin the reasons Kaito was Kid. Maybe it wasn’t a reason exactly, not the way therest of the list was. But Aoko knew better than most that love could beblinding. It made you see what you wanted to see. For her dad, a perfectdaughter. And years ago, it had been the same with her mother, not seeing theproblems until it was too late.

The Kaito is Kidlist was winning again. Every time Aoko added to it, she thought she’d justgive him one more chance. One more chance to prove he wasn’t Kid. One more. Onemore.

Maybe it was time for the last once more.

When she started this list, it’d been from a place of anger.Now Aoko just felt heavy seeing all the damning evidence that had piled upwhile she stretched to fill things in for the other column. A year was morethan enough time to work past her gut emotions and trace evidence. Any longerand Aoko wouldn’t be able to delude herself that she was still waiting forKaito to prove this theory wrong.

***

“Kaito?” Aoko said, after the school day was over andcleaning was done and the aftermath of Kaito’s pranks and a mop chase werefixed up.

“Yeah?” He had his bag in one hand and a newspaper in theother. He didn’t used to read the paper much before Kid.

“There’s a magic act this weekend that sounded like fun.Would you like to go with me?” She pushed a stubborn, flyaway strand of hairbehind her ear. “We could get dessert after.”

Kaito stared at her, probably waiting for the catch. Therewasn’t one. No Kid heist that day. Something Kaito would enjoy. Not her nagginghim to do something stereotypically romantic in hopes that he’d get a clue, orsomething she liked more than him that he’d pretend to drag his feet over.

Aoko waited. Kaito took a breath.

“Just us?” he asked.

“That okay?”

“Yeah,” he said slowly, a smile spreading on his face. “Thatsounds pretty fun. It’s been a while since we just did something together,huh?”

Not without Kid involved or Aoko dragging him there. ButAoko wasn’t going to point that out. She smiled. “It’s a date then.”

She left Kaito sputtering, face going red. She was blushingtoo, heartbeat racing at saying that out loud. Anticipation and dread curled inher. Kaito, notably, didn’t call her back or protest that it was just a friendsthing. Add that to the theory that he liked her back.

***

“Ok, but that was actually a really hard trick to do,” Kaitosaid, gesticulating with his ice cream cone. “It looks easy but if you don’t time it exactly right, the whole thingends up falling apart and looking really fake, so the fact that this guy notonly got the timing right, but made it more complicated was really cool.” He grinned,a bounce in his step. He hadn’t sat still since the performance. “Actually itgives me a lot of ideas.”

“Of course it does,” Aoko said with a theatrical sigh. “I’mgoing to have to chase you with a mop for disrupting class more often in thefuture aren’t I?”

Kaito gave her an innocent look and Aoko had to laugh. Theywere walking in the park, now, eating ice cream and letting their free handsdangle a bit too close. She hadn’t tried to take his hand and Kaito hadn’treached for hers, but it felt like a date. He kept his pace at her side insteadof a bit ahead and stayed closer than normal. It was nice.

Aoko crunched through the cone of her ice cream, barelytasting its sweetness. Pity it wouldn’t last.

“Hey, Kaito?” Aoko said, pulling Kaito out of his magiciandaydreams.

“Yeah?”

“Has it been worth it, being Kaitou Kid?”

She caught him off guard, his eyes going wide and his feettripping on nothing before he pulled himself together. Normally she likedcatching him off guard. Now, it only hammered in the truth. Kaito blinkedrapidly before laughing. “Pff! Sure, you got me, Aoko. It is I, the great, uncatchableKaitou Kid!” He gave her an exaggerated bow, almost dripping the dregs of hisice cream down his own wrist. “C’mon, Aoko, what kind of a joke question isthat?”

“Is it worth it?” Aoko repeated, refusing to react.

His masks were up now and he pushed forward irritation andhurt on his face. “It’s bad enough with Hakuba going on and on withaccusations, don’t tell me you’re going to start too. I keep saying it, I’m notKid. Don’t tell me you’re going to believe Hakuba over your best friend?”

Aoko’s hands clenched into fists. She forced them back open.Breathe. He was trying to guilt herinto backing off. But that wasn’t going to work this time. Aoko looked Kaito inthe eye and waited.

The irritation on Kaito’s face wavered. He probably didn’tknow what to do with this. Aoko always reacted. She responded. But she wasn’tthis time. “Seriously? I know your dad’s a bit of a washed up inspector, butyou’re confident enough to say you know who Kid is when he doesn’t?”

There, an attempt to get her angry—and Aoko wanted to getangry, words were at the tip of her tongue waiting to burst out in defense ofher father—but Aoko wasn’t going to.

“Kaito.”

He took a step back. For a second he almost looked scared. “Didyour dad put you up to this? Hakuba? You asked me out last time because of yourdad.”

“I asked you out because I wanted to ask you out,” Aokosaid, patience slipping. “Answer the damn question because I know you’re Kid, Kaito.”

“And what makes you so sure?” he shot back.

“I have a list. It’s four pages long.”

Kaito went pale.

“I didn’t need someone to ‘put me up to’ this.” Aoko crossedher arms. “I’m confronting you because I’ve been compiling evidence for months.I know I’m not a genius like you or Hakuba, and I don’t have Tou-san’straining, but I’m not stupid, Kaito. Even I can see what’s right in front of mewhen I think to look for it.”

“I… I don’t think you’re stupid,” he said. The remains ofhis ice cream cone were a sad dripping mess clenched in one hand, but he didn’tseem to notice.

“No?” Aoko asked. “The number of dummies you’ve left me with,the number of times you used your friendship with me to get into a heist, thetimes you used my face say otherwise.”

And Kaito flinched. Maybe it was because she usually usedmops and shouted insults instead of pointed words, but they’d hit harder thanshe expected them to. “…Why haven’t you tried to hit me yet?” he askedfinally.

“If I get mad right now you’ll just use it to run away,”Aoko said. “So, was it worth it?”

Aoko didn’t know who he’d been confiding in the last year,who he’d shared his burdens with like he used to share ideas for tricks when hewas little with her. He hadn’t confided in her about anything in a long time,longer than Kid had been around, but from the way something in Kaito’s eyesfolded like a surrender, she guessed that whatever support he had wasn’t enoughall this time. Kaito was good at faking. Good at pretending so hard he fooledhimself. Aoko doubted he’d let himself look at what was underneath all thosemasks he wore in a while, easier to compartmentalize eternally than deal withhis problems.

“Am I going to end up in handcuffs if I answer?” he asked.

“If I was going to get you arrested, would I have asked youon a date?” Aoko asked, irritation bleeding into her voice. “Bakaito, if Iwanted you arrested, I’d give Hakuba your hair to match with Kid’s and give mylist to my dad, not invite you to get ice cream.”

“Oh.” Kaito’s shoulders slumped. “I don’t know. If it’sworth it.” He stared at the mess of ice cream in his hand without seeing it. “Iwant to think it is. It’s just… It’s something I had to do.”

“Had to,” Aoko repeated, voice flat. She’d told herself shewouldn’t get angry. Don’t get angry.

“Had to,” Kaito said standing straighter. “Oyaji was thefirst Kid. His death, it wasn’t an accident, Aoko. I’m the search lightrevealing the rot hidden in the shadows—Nakamori-keibu already has arrestedsome of them, but I need to get all of them.”

Screw not gettingangry. “At the expense of dying?” Aoko growled. She always tried reallyhard not to think about the gunmen that had appeared at heists because whenevershe did, she felt so scared for her dad and Kid—Kaito. “How many times have younearly died, Kaito?”

He glowered back at her, a stubborn set to his jaw that wasmore at home on her face than it was his. “You don’t understand, Aoko, theykilled my dad. You wouldn’t get—”

“Don’t try and tell me what I wouldn’t get,” Aoko hissed,grabbing his arm. “Because I understand missing a parent just fine.”

Kaito looked away first. “Sorry. But no one else is doinganything. They’re committing crimes and killing people and no one is stoppingthem from doing it again, and if I can, then why shouldn’t I? Isn’t it themorally right thing to do?”

“Only you would make a moral argument about breaking the lawto stop other people from breaking the law,” Aoko said. Why was she in lovewith this brilliant, stupid boy? She probably would be happier in the long termif she could choose to love someone simpler. Pity the heart really didn’t careabout that sort of thing.

“Well,” Kaito said, a cautiously optimistic note of teasingentering his voice. “There’s degrees of evil, and really, as far as that goes,stealing and returning what I take is a lot lower than murder.”

“You’re also a public nuisance, cost the police too muchmoney, and are giving my dad high blood pressure.”

“Pretty sure he gives himself high blood pressure. It’s notmy fault he gets angry easily.”

Aoko smacked the back of Kaito’s head lightly and he didn’teven try to dodge. “That’s for being an idiot and lying to me. You owe me somany apologies.” She felt him flinch minutely in her grip. Aoko pulled him intoa hug, messy, melted ice cream hand and all. “And this is for finally tellingme the truth. I’m still really angry at you and I’m probably going to try andsmack you later just. For now.”

Kaito was stiff as one of his wooden dummies for a fewseconds before he grabbed her back like he was afraid she was going to changeher mind. When was the last time she’d hugged him properly? Probably not sincepuberty hit them and emotions made things awkward. “Do you hate me?”

“Idiot.” Aoko squeezed him tighter. “I’m angry, that doesn’tmean I don’t love you. I don’t forgive you yet though,” she added because therewas no way Kaito was getting out of this that easily.

“Fair enough,” Kaito said, laughing into her hair. “Wait,did you just say you love me?”

“Don’t make me regret saying that,” Aoko grumbled, feelingher face heat up.

Kaito pulled back, grinning so wide he was more smile thanface. “Does that mean you actually want to date me, not just going on a date tocorner me?”

Why was it so hard to keep composure now? Aoko hid her facein her hands. “Yes, yes, that is what it means.”

“You know I thought I’d be the one to ask you out, but youbeat me to it.” Kaito sighed, still grinning too big for any of his dramaticsto mean much. “Not fair, Aoko.”

Aoko glared at him between her fingers. “I’ve asked you outhalf a dozen times, dummy! It’s not my fault you keep acting like it’s a burdento be around me!”

“It’s not. A burden,” he said. “I just…” He scratched athis face, sheepishly. “You hate Kid. It’s been easier to keep my distance.”

“I still hate Kid.” She wasn’t going to let him thinkotherwise. “But I don’t hate Kaito, so I guess we’ll have to come to some kindof an agreement.”

“Are we dating now?”

“Do you want to be?”

Kaito caught her hands, pulling them away from her face.Aoko blushed harder and his grin lost some of its manic edges. “Yes.” And thenhe didn’t kiss her. What was he waiting for, an invitation?

Aoko growled and grabbed him by the shirt to haul him thelast little bit forward. It was a terrible terrible kiss. The second one wasmuch better.

[todaysbiggesthits]

The Exam

Best Music Moment of 2018:

Nasty: Hearing Red Eyes live. I've already said it on TBH, but seeing your favorite band in their relative prime is such a cool thing. 

BC: Since partying all night with my favorite band fell within the short window between Bestuv '17 ending and Bestuv '18 beginning, I'd have to say:

1. Kacey Musgrave's performance of "Slow Burn" on SNL

2. Radiohead perfectly executing "There There" which transported me back to Lollapalooza in '08 3. Despite the annoyance of sitting in lots of Indy500 traffic due to a new parking situation, I quite enjoyed working through half of the Stones' catalogue with Bronco riding shotgun and Codemin listening in from the flatbed of Dillon's pickup

Codem: Spending what was New Year's Eve for the central timezone in the USA at a Fijian medical bath facility listening to music, playing cards, downing tequeel and getting ringworm with my blushing bride. -hearing peter hook play the bass line from shadowplay live and in person. -Arden, JD and JJ encouraging me to go talk to Kyle from Swearin'. -Silver Jews and Westing (By Musket and Sextant) came to Spotify. -Watching "Random Rules" video for the first time

Larse: Sitting behind this massive (I mean orca fat) guy at the CHVRCHES show, feeling really bad for him before the show started because he was all alone and kept looking around and worrying about letting people in his row and things. As soon as CHVRCHES came on though, this guy was exactly where he was supposed to be that night. Sang the words and danced to every song and just made my day with how happy he was to be there. Jotted down every song of the setlist into his smartphone and just had an all around great time. And some of you motherfuckers won't even go to a movie by yourself!

JD: May: A moody Chinatown stroll with the new Grouper album in the rain. July: Soaking up some good tunes at the housewarming party to ring in our new pad. July: Some hilariously rambunctious youths having at it when “House of Jealous Lovers” came on during a full play of Compilation 1 at the DFA summer party. One of them (who must have been ~8 in the bygone days of 02) screamed out “this is the song that started it all!” to a crowd of stationary gawkers and I felt a brief moment of hope for the youngs. August: Shaking a leg at Pete’s wedding (also featuring a delightful hojl spin). September: A rowdy spin of “Sentient Oona” on the Levee juke with an impromptu digital jukebox dance party at the Turkey’s Nest with jj’s cousin and his lovely girlfriend. October: The best music cue I’ve ever seen at the end of Beau Travail.

Bronco: Taking John to his first concert, and that first concert was Mastodon. That was pretty awesome to be able to share that experience with him. He was super into it, and so were the metalheads at the show. "Dad of the Year" was definitely shouted more than a few times, and I thought to myself, "fuckin-A right."

Chap: My kids saying "Papa" when "She Drives Me Crazy" by Fine Young Cannibals comes on.

Best Shows Seen in 2018:

C: Open Mike Eagle at Pitchfork

Bronco: Sleep

Laser: CHVRCHES at Riverside Theater; Chromeo at Summerfest

BC: The Brian Jonestown Massacre, Radiohead

Nasty: The War on Drugs. 

Code: kraus - schubas peter hook - metro no age - the bottle swearin' - bowery eleanor friedberger - lincoln hall my bloody valentine - aragon "quickly climbing the ranks of my nice" ballroom kraus - the bottle pictureplane - bottom lounge soft moon - the bottle book of love - chop shop

JD: 1. Shame at Market Hotel 2. Hamilton Leithauser at the Carlyle Hotel 3. Beach House at United Palace Theater 4. The Voidz at Elsewhere 5. Parquet Courts’ Wide Awake! mid-day album release show with my morning coffee at Rough Trade

6. Flasher at St. Vitus 7. Deafheaven at Brooklyn Steel 8. Panda Bear at Brooklyn Steel 9. No Age at Brooklyn Bazaar 10. CCFX at the DFA summer party at Elsewhere with my girlfriend in full blown rem sleep standing up with her head on my shoulder 11. Alex Cameron at Warsaw 12. Gang Gang Dance and Interpol at House of Vans Of note: Dekkar at On Cinema Live at the Bell House.

Confession of 2018:

JD: I have a real TBH confession that I held until now. I was thoroughly enjoying the Flasher album on a recent evening after a few too many drinks when a burning urge to see them washed over me. They had a show coming up at a bar just a few blocks from my apartment, so I enthusiastically snapped up tickets for me and jj. Thinking this might be a good opportunity for a TBH outing, I emailed Chap trying to peer pressure him into attending the Flasher show and gauging his interest in a Parquet Courts concert that would be happening the following evening. No response.

We later received an invitation to a holiday cocktail party at a friend’s apartment on the same night as the Flasher show, and I hatched a cockamamie scheme to go from our home in Greenpoint to the party in Soho, leave after an hour to catch the concert back in Greenpoint, head back to the party in Soho, and finally retire back to Greenpoint. JJ wisely passed on such a scheme and I left the party to trek off to the concert solo with an extra ticket in tow. 

Awash in good cheer and excitement while Flasher set up, I thought what the hell, might as well take a flier on reminding Chap of the show. Maybe the twins are asleep, he’s just sitting around, can jump into a cab, claim the extra ticket, watch the show, and cruise on back. Mid-text I paused, wondering just why he never responded to the initial email weeks ago. A quick gmail search, and there sat my drunkenly composed beseechment to join, rotting in the drafts folder unsent. 

A couple of the dudes from Parquet Courts were bouncing around the bar, and I decided it would make more sense to hit up Chap about attending their show the next day than explain the whole snafu and extend a ludicrous invitation that required dropping everything and leaving immediately for a show he didn’t even know was happening. I ate the extra ticket, had a blast watching Flasher, zipped back to the party, drank myself into oblivion, and was way too hung over to even consider the Parquet Courts show the next day. NICK SORRY NICK! (editor’s note: too long)

Larson: I saw Timberlake at Fiserv Forum

BC: My neighbor invited me to see Imagine Dragons. I lied and said I had to travel for work. "On a Saturdee?" he inquired. "Yeah. Totally sucks," I awkwardly replied. I hid inside my house all weekend.

Bronco: I'd rather see shows by myself than with my buddy. He likes going to shows, and I keep inviting him, and we have a fine time, but he doesn't live in town anymore, so I gotta worry about him drinking too much and driving an hour home. And his wife is a psychopath and that complicates shit. Too much. And it's just so much more freeing being able to not give a fuck about anyone else during that time, to just soak it all in, it feels good and right.

Codem: -despite all of the bad things that kanye said, i still liked listening to his catalogue throughout the year. i even liked his EP that came out in 2018.   -i really liked the beach house album!   -i liked the snail mail album, skipped two opportunities to see her and then by --the end of the year, i thought the album was sort of boring.   -Arden and i went to see pictureplane open for alice glass and thought that the show sucked and pictureplane played such stupid songs. three months later, he put out my favorite album of the year and i can't stop thinking that i hated all of the same songs the first time i heard them. -i read an article on a bright fall saturday morning that exhaustively detailed the Cardi B and Nicki Minaj feud and i watched all of the instagram story clips that showed Cardi B scrolling through her phone with those outlandish nails of hers. it took me two cups of coffee to get through it all, but get through it i did. [i couldn't think of nicki minaj's name just now so i stared at the ceiling and kept running through names in my mind's eye: missy, kim, cardi, kelis, kim??, eve, trina. i couldn't remember. so i finally googled "kanye monster" and found her name. easy.]

Nasty: I'm done with new music. It’s over. I didn't listen to a single new album - I don't even know if I could name a new album. Realistically, I did like Daytona. 

Biggest Disappointment of 2018:

Nasty: MAGA Kanye

Larse: Timberlake at Fiserv Forum

Bronco: Black Tusk, Alice in Chains

BC: Getting into The Orwells literally two days before #MeToo chewed 'em up and spit 'em out

Chap: Car Seat Headrest. Can't believe he's gay! jk the album was the disappointment.

Code: -somebody hacked my spotify account and wiped all of my music and replaced it with raggaeton and halsey. i was able to get my music back, but i lost all of my meticulously cared for folder structure. -i wanted the simple minds album to be cool; it was not.   -i wanted the swearin' album to be really great; it was okay. -pictureplane and ovlov did not tour their albums.   -i had to eat two tickets to my bloody valentine after buying four. the original show sold out and i thought i was going to be able to sell my extras for a profit -- they ended up announcing a second show and there was no secondary market for the original show.   -no CCFX followup ):  

JD: Got to Hammerstein Ballroom for MBV and there was a line longer than an entire avenue. They were already on by the time we made it into the heinously oversold venue and we were stuck by the bar in the lobby surrounded by people constantly shouting in an effort to compete with the apocalyptic noise.

C: Terrible sound at Tame Impala show

Most Overrated of 2018:

Code: -probably that kacey musgraves album; i got absolutely nothing out of it. also, i liked the robyn album, but i wanted to love it after many years between releases. i think i'm just being greedy.   -i'm going to get killed for this, but the throwing the baby out with the bathwater approach to artists' criminal behavior or inflammatory tweets is pretty overrated right now. 

Bronco: Ghost - I like their schtick, with rotating members and the whole inverted church thing. It's campy but they're sticking to it, and that's fine, but their music isn't metal. It's poppy glam shit about the devil, and that's also fine, but I don't get why it's on anyone's list. Production value maybe? But the music itself isn't anything to write home about. I just don't get it.

JD: n/a. The thick layer of nonsensical, Pynchonian obfuscation the platform economy dollops over everything has made it impossible to understand how anything is rated. Almost feel bad for the click driven publications that have to just throw out a guess.

C: Mitski

Chap: Snail Mail

BC: Kanye. His new music is no longer good enough to put up with his bufoonery.

Laser: Timberlake at Fiserv Forum

Nasty: Clemson. GOARSH. 

Make It Stop 2018:

Nasty: DJT, anytime now. 

Bronco: Party politics. No more labels allowed. You can have a list of stuff you support and a list of stuff you are against, but that's fucking it. No more this side vs that side for reasons as caddy as an R vs. a D. Also religion having any influence whatsoever in the way our country is run. Believe whatever you want to believe, but don't force your bullshit on anyone else. You want to torment yourself with a lifelong christian guilt trip, that's your boat to float, but don't go poking holes in my boat just because you're a miserable fuck. Just stop. Also, Jack White.

Larse: Timberlake at Fiserv Forum

Chap: Baby Shark

BC: My shrinking attention span

JD: The cultural currency of clapbacks, shade, and tea.

Code: trap music playing from a phone's external speaker while i'm trapped on public transportation.  i'm going to go broke buying enough earbuds to distribute to these offenders.

Biggest TBH Regret of 2018:

Larse: Timberlake at Fiserv Forum

C: Not seeing Low at a church on University of Chicago's Campus

JD: -Hearing about a Grouper show at a church around the corner from my pad after it sold out. -Not necessarily a regret because I didn’t know it was happening, but oh how I wish I had seen Jon Glaser and Jon Benjamin as Dave Farina and Dave Franz, Dennis and Dennis’ sons, at a Bowery Ballroom Yo La Tengo show.

BC: -I wish I would've cooked up a way to see Shame play a midnight show in Bloomington.  I just want that kid to scream "Concrete" in my face. -I probably should've seen Smashing Pumpkins when they rolled through town too. 

Code: my flight got delayed and i missed the swearin' show at that place in brooklyn that "smelled like hot fish"

Bronco: Not a regret so much as I was super-bummed when High on Fire dropped out of the tour I saw in November. The venue we were at put my buddy and I right next to the stage. It would've been crazy awesome to see HOF there, but they've rescheduled at least, and I'll see them in January.

Bin: I haven't listened to any Kanye this year. I thought it would feel gratifying by year end - it doesn't. I'll probably still avoid this most recent album, but I'm going back to the well. I'll continue to talk shit about him though. Take that Ye!

Chap: No regrets 

Detective Murtaugh of 2018:

Larse: Getting too old to keep up with all of this new music and put a worthwhile list together at the end of the year…

Nasty:

Code: i added book of love show to my top ten concert list because Arden and i were able to take a seat on the ground in the balcony section. we had to continually move our spot on the floor to be able to peer through the railing and a mass of bodies in order to catch a glimpse of the stage.

JD: -Two of my favorite music related experiences of the year were seeing Hamilton Leithauser in the cafe of the Carlyle Hotel and the extended Niles family in The Nutcracker at the NYC Ballet. -When I googled “Detective Murtaugh” just now it was mostly pictures of Damon Wayans (Jr. no less!) playing the role on the Lethal Weapon CBS series.

Bronco: Putting up with shit instead of speaking up about it. There's room on the train but I'm squished by the door because some self-absorbed dinks won't move in? "Could you please move in?" It sounds so simple, but breaking that silence barrier was a scary thing. Now I don't give a shit. I'm on train for two stops, and I'm not going to see you again, so fuck you, move in or I'm going to move myself in and it aint gonna be pleasant for you.

Chap: A hipster female barber said I was a silver fox. AYFKM?

BC: What the hell is Fortnite?

Resolution for 2018 Update:

Larse: get my list in on time! How it went: probably horseshit! (editor’s note: it was early yet!)

NACK: While I didn’t have the occasion to catch shows this year, I anticipate doing so in '18 due to some changes afoot. How it went: Joe Dons has yet to let me know of a concert going on and I have no other friends here, so I blame him for my failure

Bin: I’m just going to keep saying “get to NY for a show with JD” until I make it happen. How it went: Didn't get to NY for a show with JD.

JD: See you gents more often with or without a show attached.  How it went: Fairly decent, but is it really ever enough?

Bronco: Get in shape. I want to stick to a schedule of running all year round. I ran a 10K back in June, then needed to recover for a bit, been recovering ever since…Fat Dad needs to keep running all year round without excuse, especially given that we go skiing between Xmas and New Year’s and I’m gonna be a floppy legged mess. During those runs, I’ll try to listen to new material each time. How it went: I ran a 5-miler in May. Haven't run since. Though I have been reasonably consistent with my prison workout (situps and pushups before bed time), so now there's a hint of muscle under my fat dad layer. Just gotta combine the two now somehow.

Code: make more playlists for my wife How it went: i said that i was going to make more mixes for my wife. i made one year-end mix for her and i'm sure she's loving it :*

BC: No more resolutions How it went: 2018 Resolution was "No More Resolutions," so pretty darn good!

Resolution for 2019:

Laser: ---

BC: Listen to one new album a week; reboot the Classic Album Review Club

JD: Greater consciousness of how I’m using my attention - an ineffectual and meaningless protest of the ways the world is burning down in pursuit of it.

Bronco: Read more 'classic' books. I didn't read many of them, even in school (especially in school? Never could read a book I was told to read). But I'm leaning in the sci-fi direction of 'classics'. I just read Dune this summer, and wrapped up Fahrenheit 451 the other day. I'm feeling an unexplained need to beef up my nerd credentials and this seems the way to accomplish it.

Chap: Learn Piano; Guilt Joe Dons into finally inviting me to a concert

Nasty: I'm sticking with it - get to NY for a show with JD.

Code: catch ovlov, pictureplane, washer, chromatics, EMA and colleen green live this year.

Most Anticipated of 2019:

Bronco: Tool. Fifth year's the charm. I'm actually hopeful this time around. In fact, I half expect them to drop it on New Year's Eve or something, just so it's post Listicle season, but not quite 2019 so it can't end up on those lists either. They're such dicks like that.

BC: Still waitin' on dat Vampire Weekend yet

Chap: Vampire Weekend, Chromatics

C: Lin Manuel in Mary Poppins... I kid, My Bloody Valentine

JD: Going to put Frank Ocean out into the universe, MBV take 2, Grimes, Panda Bear, Kanye’s escape from the Black Lodge

Codem: chromatics - tommy, MBV, washer, colleen green, EMA(?), DoM

Laser: no idea what's even on the docket

Nasty: Mueller's Report