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queenshelby · 3 years

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THE SECRET - part one of three

Featuring: Cillian Murphy x Virgin!Reader

Summary: You are a new cast member, playing Tommy Shelby’s love interest. During filming, you fall for your co-star Cillian Murphy.

Words: 6,556

Warning: Smut, Age Gap

Notes: For the purpose of this fic, Cillian is single.

Tag List: @lilymurphy03 @deefigs

@chrisevanshoeeee @desperate-and-broken

@weepingstudentfishhorse @fookingshelby @livinginfantaxy

@atomicsoulcollecto @datewithgianni @mariapaiva13

The Scene

You were nervous. This was your first role in a popular TV show.

You had been on small production TV shows in your home country of France. But this was different. The show had international success and you couldn’t believe that the producers of the show had chosen you for the role of 27-year-old Yvette L’mare for the series’ final Season.

You spoke fluent French and English and had experience in scenes with extensive dialogue due to your theatrical experience since you were 12.

But, you were by no means as experienced as some of the other candidates they had casted. After all, you were only 19.

You read the scripts over and over again after your successful audition and made yourself small rehearsal cards for each scene. The dialogue heavy scenes didn’t concern you. But, there were some scenes which were out of your comfort zone.

Your script included two intimate scenes with the actor who played the main character of the show, Thomas Shelby.

The first scene was simple enough, not much more than a kiss. The second scene, however, was to be filmed under closed set. Neither of you were going to be clothed in more than underpants, which meant that only the director, one assistant and the camara man would be present.

Before the audition, you watched the last two seasons of Peaky Blinders and you re-watched them just a week ago as part of your preparation and to give you an idea what the director will look for when filming these kinds of scenes.

Before that, you hadn’t paid much attention to the show.

From watching some of the series, it was obvious to you that your co-star was experienced. He portrayed Thomas Shelby impressively well which was something that made you even more nervous.

Will you live up to the standards of the director? Or will you fail miserably with these challenging scenes?

It didn’t matter. It was all too late now. You signed the Contract and were on your way to England.

You arrived a day before filming started in order to settle into your apartment.

The apartment was located within a hotel residence that was booked out for the cast for the entire period of production.

You shared a small two-bedroom apartment with another new cast member named Emma. Emma was from France as well and, ironically, portrayed your sister in the show. Emma was 24, slightly older than you and quite attractive. You immediately got along. She was focused, didn’t care much about partying and was down to earth.

For the first evening, after everyone arrived, the producers organised a dinner to introduce the new cast and crew members to everyone. This was when you first got to meet your co-star, Cillian.

Since you had several scenes together, the director of the show took the time to personally introduce you to Cillian.

Cillian greeted you with a big smile and you knew immediately why so many women were smitten by him. You recalled that, when you told friends and family about your audition, they wouldn’t stop talking about Thomas Shelby and how insanely attractive he was.

They were not wrong. But, what impressed you the most about Cillian was that he was so easy going and funny.

You talked to him for a while, about the most random topics, ignoring everyone else for at least 20 minutes until it was time for you to meet the other cast members.

‘Looks like you two have a lot to talk about?’ Anthony said jokingly.

‘Talking about wine’ you smiled, rather shyly.

‘Yeah, I got carried away talking about the wine production in the province. Did you know that Y/N’s parents own Bessiux Wines?’ Cillian asked, catching Anthony by surprise. ‘His sister got married at your parents’ estate last August’ Cillian added, causing Anthony to nod.

You talked about your parents’ winery for a little longer before Anthony asked you to meet the other cast members.

‘I am looking forward to working with you Cillian’ you said as you walked away and he responded with a smile and comforting ‘Likewise’.

After your encounter with Cillian you were introduced to Finn Cole and Natasha O’Keefe. You heard about Finn from your new roommate but only just then realised that he portrays Michael Grey.

You talked to both Finn and Natasha for a while and, whilst you enjoyed their company, you wished that you had some more time to talk to Cillian. Unfortunately for you, he left rather early that evening.

The next day, you picked up your schedule for the week and noticed that the scenes you prepared for were to be shot completely out of order.

In fact, your most intimate scene was scheduled for 10am on Day 2 of Production. You couldn’t believe it. You were by no means prepared for that.

Your first day on set went well and the director of the show complimented your work on several occasions. But, when filming was finished for the day, your nervousness sat in.

‘Are you alright Y/N?’ Emma asked as you were picking on your salad and looked at tomorrow’s scripts.

‘Yeah, just a bit nervous’ you sighed.

Emma looked over your shoulder to read your script.

‘Wow, they are throwing you right into the deep end’ she giggled.

‘Yes, they are’ you said with a shy smile before listening to some advice from Emma, who had more experience than you acting on screen.

That night, after reading your scripts at least ten more times and letting it play out in your head, you could not sleep and your lack of sleep was evident on set the next day.

‘Are you alright Y/N?’ Cillian asked concerned, noticing your yawning and your hands shivering slightly.

‘Yes, I am fine. I am just trying to think how to act the next scene. From reading this, it isn’t very clear to me what exactly I need to do’ you said concerned.

‘These scenes are scripted in a way to allow for improvisation. From experience, actors often fail to act these kinds of scenes directly to script, that’s why’ Cillian laughed.

‘Right, so the script is lacking the details on purpose?’ you asked.

‘Correct’ Cillian said. ‘John and Anthony will tell us what to do and in which direction to face so that you are covered. You don’t need to worry’ Cillian said reassuringly, causing you to giggle.

‘I am not worried about anyone seeing my breasts or something. I just don’t know what do, where to put my hands, my face, any of that’ you explained with total embarrassment.

‘Well, I suppose you just pretend to do what you would normally do when you are getting down to business’ Cillian said with a chuckle, not knowing how else to explain it.

‘Well, my experience in this department is limited. So, I apologise in advance for any awkwardness’ you said, your cheeks flushing even through the dense make up.

‘Y/N, these scenes are awkward even for the most experienced actors. If it gets too uncomfortable, we can postpone it, alright’ Cillian said, keeping a relaxed approach.

‘Alright. Thanks Cillian’ you said just before it was time for you to get changed into your gown.

The next time you would see Cillian was on the closed set, pretending to make love to him on the large cedar bed.

Just as you were getting undressed in the change room and put on the skin-coloured panties and robe you were given by the set assistant, you topped up your perfume.

You were going to be so close to each other, at least you wanted to smell nice.

After you were done, the set assistant applied some more lipstick and fixed up your hair before you sat down on the large bed. You were nervous, your heart pounding.

Cillian was much more relaxed sitting next to you in black Clavin Klein briefs. There was no need for a robe, his intimate parts were well covered, unlike yours.

His freckled skin was highlighted by the light which had not yet been adjusted and you couldn’t help but look at him while you made an effort to keep your small breasts covered from him at this point.

The cameraman was angling the camera while the director discussed the scene with you and Cillian.

You knew that this was going to be a disaster. The issue wasn’t so much that you were naked in front of the camera and the director, but more the fac that, as part of the scene, another man who you felt somewhat attracted to was about to see you like this, completely vulnerable. He was about to touch your naked skin and kiss you, but not out of his own accord. It felt absurd to you, yet you knew this was part of the job.

Finally, after the director gave his instructions, you got yourself into position.

With some embarrassment you handed the set assistant your robe and lied down on the bed.

You were waiting for some kind of joke from Cillian to lighten up the mood, but Cillian was very professional.

He sat down right next to you and you could tell that he was trying very hard to look away from your breasts.

Before he climbed over you to get into position, he gave you a warning. Regardless of the warning, you stopped breathing for a minute as he positioned himself on top of you.

‘Are you alright?’ he asked as he could see the nervousness on your face.

‘Yes’ you nodded, taking in a deep breath. He was so close that you could smell his skin and the scent of his aftershave.

‘Sink down a bit on the left forearm Cillian, we want to keep the rating below R18’ the director said with a laugh because your breasts were fully visible on camera.

‘We do?’ Cillian chuckled, causing you to laugh just before Cillian adjusted his position as instructed. For a short moment, his chest brushed against your left breast.

‘I am sorry’ he said politely.

‘It’s alright Cilly’ you said.

‘I think we are good now guys, I will count to three and we start the first part of the scene’ the director said.

It felt like an eternity with Cillian on top of you by the time the director called action.

In this scene, Tommy and Yvette were having sex. It was to start with a kiss followed by the obvious act.

There was no practice for a scene like this and, as soon as you heard the word action, Cillian’s lips slowly met yours. You closed your eyes and caressed his face with your hands as you let him take the lead. The kiss lasted for what felt like an eternity until he pulled away from you.

His body was soon grinding against yours, but without your most intimate parts touching. He made sure of that. Regardless of this, you could feel his legs in between yours and his chest brushing against your breasts. The sensation sent shivers down your body and small little goosebumps began to cover your chest. How embarrassing you thought and, unfortunately for you, your embarrassment was evident on your face and the cut was called.

You attempted the scene again several times. You kissed over and over again and your hands moved from his face to his arms and chest, exploring his skin while his body was grinding against you.

But, this wasn’t enough for the director who picked up that the movement of your hands and the expressions on your face weren’t giving the viewers the impression that this was real. Your biggest problem was that you were attracted to Cillian and you realised this more than ever during this scene and tried very hard to hide it, making you look nervous and embarrassed.

After a few more takes, the director suggested a break.

‘I am so sorry Cillian’ you said as you sat next to him in your dressing gown.

‘Don’t be. You are doing fine. These scenes can be tricky and really shouldn’t be scheduled for the second day of filming’ he said with a warm smile before excusing himself.

He was gone for about ten minutes while you had some water and waited for further instructions from the team.

When he returned, he informed you that he agreed with the director that the scene be postponed.

‘Cillian, I can do this, really’ you said upset about the postponement.

‘I know you can, but like I said, it’s the second day of filming and it would probably be easier once we had a few more scenes together’ Cillian suggested.

‘Is that not going to be a problem with the set up?’ you asked.

‘No, the prop can stay here for another month and one of the perks of being a producer is that I get a say in this stuff’ Cillian smiled.

‘I feel like such a failure’ you said embarrassed.

‘You are not Y/N, you are doing great, really’ Cillian said, his hands touching your arms.

‘Common, time to get ready for more scenes’ he said with a warm smile and you followed him to get changed, separately of course.

Mr Matchmaker

Later that night, some of the cast members were heading to the pub for dinner and you sat down next to Natasha and Emma when you arrived.

You told Natasha and Emma about what happened on set. You were still upset about it.

‘Oh gosh, don’t worry Y/N. Cillian is very easy going and Anthony is very impressed with your scenes from the first day so you have nothing to worry about. I remember my first sex scene with Cillian and it took nine takes and a lot of laughter to get it right’ Natasha said.

‘How do you know when it’s right though? It’s extremely awkward’ you said.

‘If it looks like you are having sex then it’s right’ Natasha laughed. ‘I actually think about the man in my life and just switch off throughout the scene. So, if you have a boyfriend, think about him. That might help with the comfort level’ Natasha said.

‘I am happily single’ you said with a smile just as Cillian arrived at the table.

‘You are late’ Natasha said, noticing the frustration on his face.

‘Sorry’ Cillian said as he sat down next to you.

‘Still dramas with Nadine?’ Natasha asked, causing you to wonder who Nadine was.

‘Yes’ he responded just before he ordered himself a drink.

Throughout the conversation you learned that Nadine was Cillian’s ex-girlfriend with whom he broke up as little as six weeks ago. Him and Nadine were together for three years and shared a house in Dublin until recently.

Your group was soon joined by some more cast members, including Finn Cole and everyone seemed in a pretty good mood.

You talked to Finn for a while until you excused yourself to get another drink.

As you walked to the bar, you noticed Cillian following you and engaged in a conversation with him.

‘Just in case you haven’t noticed, Finn seems to like you’ Cillian said as he stood next to you at the bar.

‘Oh, what makes you say that?’ you asked.

‘I just know. My matchmaking abilities are impeccable’ he joked.

Whilst you felt flattered, you weren’t interested in Finn and little did Cillian know that he was the one you had your eye on.

‘Really?’ you asked.

‘Yes, really. You should probably consider him. He is a nice guy, down to earth, good looking, the right age’ Cillian said cheekily.

‘I have my eyes on someone else Cillian, but thank you for your efforts’ you said with slight embarrassment and a hint of humour.

‘Now I am intrigued. Who is it? Someone on set?’ Cillian asked.

‘None of your business Mr Matchmaker’ you laughed.

‘Well, if you ever require my services, you know where to find me’ Cillian said, causing you to raise your eyebrows.

‘Services as in setting you up with someone from the crew, discreetly of course’ Cillian laughed, realising that his comment may have been received by you in the wrong way.

‘Right, you got me excited there for a moment’ you said jokingly.

‘Did I?’ Cillian joked. ‘Now that makes me feel good at my age’ Cillian added.

You knew how old he was. You googled him, just before you came to the pub, because you were curious about him, his background, things he doesn’t talk about. But, to your surprise, the fact that he was nearing 45, didn’t bother you the slightest and it certainly didn’t dampen the attraction you felt towards him.

You also knew that, being 19 years old, you would have no chance with him. He wasn’t the type of actor who was chasing young models like many other celebrities his age.

You and Cillian talked and joked for another 20 minutes before he excused himself. He had a busy day filming ahead of him and needed to get some rest.

Over the next few days, Cillian and you had several scenes together and spent some of your breaks together. You enjoyed his company and he clearly also enjoyed yours.

On Day 9 of Production, you even went as far and asked Cillian whether he wanted to watch the Liverpool game with you and Emma.

He accepted your invitation and you were quite excited. Emma was confused as to why you invited him over but didn’t think much about it until there was a knock on the door and she opened it.

To both of your surprise, Cillian had invited Finn along. Was he really so oblivious to the fact that you were attracted to him that he had to bring a sidekick, you thought?

The evening went rather slow and with you sitting in between Finn and Emma, you felt somewhat uncomfortable.

The next day, on Day 10 of Production, you had another somewhat intimate scene with Cillian. It wasn’t more than a kiss and some touching. Regardless, you were nervous but not nervous enough to first ask him why he invited Finn.

‘He invited himself when I told him about it’ Cillian chuckled. ‘I told you, he likes you’ he added.

‘That’s just great because now Emma thinks that I have a thing for him’ you said laughing.

‘These Rumours. You got to love them. Sometimes I seriously feel like I am back at school working here’ Cillian laughed.

This conversation led to an interesting question from Cillian. After you had time to talk about your days at school, he brought up your upcoming birthday. You seemed to have referred to school as a recent event, so he couldn’t help but ask how old you were turning.

‘I am turning 20’ you responded, causing Cillian to look at you almost like he had seen a ghost.

‘You are 19?’ he asked.

‘You seem surprised. How old did you think I was?’ you asked.

‘Not sure, mid or late twenties maybe?’ Cillian said just as the set assistant called you both to the scene.

Your nervousness set back in as you took your position in Thomas Shelby’s office.

The scene started of with a dialogue between Thomas Shelby and Yvette which went smoothly, as expected. The next part of the scene involved Thomas lifting Yvette onto his desk and kiss her passionately while running his hands over the back of her body.

The first attempt resulted in Cillian and you both laughing as he lifted you up. It was awkward and it didn’t help that you were ticklish.

The next take went smoothly. Cillian lifted you on to the desk gently before his hands ran down your back while he kissed you. Your hands caressed his face as he did and the director had to call the cut on the kiss.

You enjoyed it, and to his surprise, so did Cillian. He felt uncomfortable about enjoying kissing you or even spending time with you outside of work. Not only were you a co-worker but you were also much younger than him.

A sense of guilt ran through his mind right after the scene now that he knew your age. Kissing you shouldn’t feel good, it was wrong.

The director was happy with the scene and you hopped back off the table before asking Cillian whether he wanted to have lunch with you.

Little did you know that your lunch date was going to be your last with him for while as Cillian was trying hard to keep his distance from you thereafter.

Birthday Surprise

But this all changed another week later, on your birthday, which was Day 17 of Production.

By that point, filming was getting to you and you were tired and, therefore, declined the offer from Natasha to organise a birthday party for you.

Instead, you and some of the crew and cast went for dinner at a nearby restaurant.

The food was amazing and you spent two hours at the restaurant after a rather long day of filming. By about 8.30pm half of the crew and cast had left and it was only you, Cillian, Emma, Sam and Finn who stayed.

Finn was going to meet some friends at a nearby pub at 9pm and invited you all to join him. Whilst Emma and Sam agreed, you and Cillian weren’t keen and made your way back to the apartment complex.

‘Would you like a glass of wine?’ you blurted out all of a sudden just as you were both getting into the elevator. This question took all of your courage after Cillian had been avoiding to spend time with you.

‘I think the hotel bar is closed already’ Cillian said.

‘Well, as it happens, I am holding a bottle of red wine in my hand’ you said cheekily holding up the birthday present from Natasha.

‘I am not sure Y/N, we have to be up early’ Cillian said.

‘Common, it’s my birthday’ you said convincingly, causing Cillian to laugh.

‘Alright, I suppose why not’ Cillian said as followed you down the hallway.

‘Your place. Emma is determined to pick up a date at the pub’ you laughed.

‘Yeah, I don’t want to be there for that’ Cillian joked as you walked further down the hallway. Your apartments were on the same floor.

You walked into Cillian’s apartment and took off your jacket before sitting down on the small lounge.

Just after Cillian poured two glasses of red wine and sat down next to you, his phone rang.

The display showed ‘Incoming Call from Nadine’ and he turned his phone to silent.

‘You should let me pick it up, it might solve all your problems’ you joked.

‘It just might’ Cillian laughed as he pressed the ‘Ignore’ button and put the phone down.

Just after the short interruption, Cillian and you began to talk about your work, travelling and some other things until he brought up an uncomfortable topic.

‘Do you remember two weeks ago when I tried to talk you into going out with Finn?’ Cillian asked.

‘Yes, Mr Matchmaker, I remember. Why?’ you said.

‘You said that you had your eyes on someone else…who is it?’ Cillian asked with a laugh, causing you to take a deep breath.

‘Oh god, are you still going on with this?’ you said with a laugh. This was the fourth time Cillian had asked you this question since you mentioned it to him.

‘Common, I have been pondering about this for weeks now. Tell me’ Cillian said.

‘No’ you giggled.

‘I promise I won’t tell anyone’ Cillian said.

‘Stop it’ you responded.

‘Alright, I will take a guess’ Cillian said before taking a pause. ‘Harry?’ Cillian asked, causing you to shake your head.

‘Daryl?’ he asked, causing you to shake your head again.

‘I don’t know then. That’s literally everyone who is around your age’ Cillian laughed.

‘Who said he’s around my age?’ you asked, causing Cillian to raise his eyebrow.

‘Paul?’ he then asked, causing you to shake your head again. Was he really that oblivious?

‘Everyone else is married, I think’ Cillian said.

‘You are not’ you said shyly after taking in a deep breath.

‘Me?’ he asked after taking a deep breath while his blue eyes looked at you, full of questions.

Your heart was pounding, your hand shaking again. There was no turning back now.

‘Yes, you’ you said nervously, looking at him almost fearful about his response.

He drew another deep breath while, in his mind, he was thinking about what to say.

‘Y/N, I feel humbled and it’s not that you aren’t a beautiful and smart woman, but I am more than twice your age’ he said.

‘Ignore the age difference for a minute and tell me that you don’t feel the same, that you don’t want me’ you said.

‘It is irrelevant what I feel and what I want, it still doesn’t make it right’ he responded.

‘But, are you attracted to me? It’s a simple question’ you asked nervously and, after drawing another deep breath, Cillian responded.

‘I’ve been trying very hard not to be...unsuccessfully so’ he sighed, causing you to smile.

‘Alright’ you said with the biggest grin on your face.

‘Alright?’ Cillian asked surprised by your response. This didn’t mean that he was going to give into you just like this and ignore his concerns, or did it?

‘So, what do you propose we do now? This will make things very awkward on set’ he said concerned.

‘This’ you said as you leaned in and pressed your lips onto his. His lips were just as soft as the last time you kissed on set, but this time there was an intensity and urgency between you.

He gave into the kiss as if there had never been any doubt and, unlike previous kisses you shared in a professional capacity, this time, when his lips parted, you could feel his tongue slip in between your lips and it wasn’t long until your tongues moved in sync with each other.

The kiss lasted for what felt like an eternity and you wanted so much more than taste his lips.

‘This is wrong Y/N’ Cillian said as your lips finally drifted apart.

‘Do you want me to leave?’ you asked, caressing his face, staring at all of the freckles which covered him.

‘No’ he said, earning him a smile from you just as he reached beneath your shirt and pressed his lips back onto yours.

His warm hands ran over the sides of your abdomen, up and down, until he lifted your t-shirt over your head.

It wasn’t that he hadn’t seen you like this before, but it felt different. His eyes didn’t have to shy away from your breasts and the rest of your body this time.

With his hands cupping your breasts, which were still covered by your black lace bra, the kiss intensified. It became more urgent and more passionate.

Your hands soon found their way beneath Cillian’s t-shirt also and, this time, touching his skin didn’t feel awkward or inappropriate.

Within seconds, his t-shirt landed on the floor next to yours just before Cillian’s fingers had found the clip of your bra.

It didn’t take his skilled fingers long to unclip it and let it join the rest of the clothes which you had already gotten rid of.

He took a moment to look at your breasts, right there in front of him yet again.

‘What’s wrong?’ you asked concerned as you noticed him stare at them.

‘Nothing, just taking in the beautiful view without feeling guilty about it’ Cillian smirked.

‘You checked out my breasts when we were filming, didn’t you?’ you said sheepishly.

‘Of course not’ he said with a laugh before he guided you backwards and down onto your bed.

You both were quick to remove your jeans and, moments later, there you were again, on the bed together wearing nothing but underpants. Just this time, there were no cameras. You were free to touch and kiss each other the way you pleased. It didn’t feel awkward. To the contrary. It felt right.

Hoovering over you again Cillian began to gently kiss your neck while one of his hands ran over your firm breasts. Finally, he was able to touch them, feel every inch of them.

Cillian soon worked his way to the lobe of your ear, playing with it using his tongue. Lightly sucking on it as his hand moved to your other breast, squeezing your nipple gently.

You didn't want this to end, and with a soft moan, you signaled Cillian to continue exploring your body. And so he did. You had never been with a man before, but in the moment, this felt comfortable, felt right.

As he continued to cast his spell on you and work his magic, your body responded. Your lace panties were soaking and your muscles began to vibrate with an unfamiliar feeling.

As Cillian’s lips moved back to your mouth for another passionate kiss, one of his hands wandered further down your body. But he was in no hurry, taking his time explore all of your body.

Cillian’s tongue began to gently drift between your lips and you responded with yours. Your arms wrapped around him, pulling him even closer to you as his hand reached the top of your lace panties.

Pushing your panties aside slightly, he ran his fingers over your wet entrance, slowly and gently while his lips never left yours.

You moaned into the kiss just as the tip of one of his fingers dipped into you slightly.

You took in a deep breath and broke the kiss for a brief moment.

‘Cillian, I never had sex with anyone’ you said, causing him to remove his hand from your wet mound.

‘It’s alright. We won’t go that far until you are ready’ he said reassuringly.

‘That’s so embarrassing, I am sorry’ you said.

‘What is?’ Cillian asked, slightly confused.

‘I am 20, it’s weird don’t you think?’ you said shyly, your face flushed.

‘Don’t be silly Y/N. There is no rush’ Cillian said as he ran his hand over your cheek. ‘If it is any consolation to you, I didn’t expect any of this, tonight, with you and I am enjoying every moment of it even if we don’t have sex’ he added.

‘So am I Cillian’ you smiled.

‘Good’ Cillian said before kissing you again gently.

The kiss soon became heated again but Cillian wasn’t taking it further, giving you the chance to set the pace at which you were willing to move.

But, you enjoyed him playing with you, teasing your most intimate parts and, after several more minutes of passionate kisses, you guided his hand back in between your legs.

Your actions earned you a chuckle from him as his lips moved from your lips down to your breasts slowly.

As Cillian was gently trailing kisses over your breasts, your hand made it’s way in between your bodies where it found the elastic of his Calvin Klein briefs.

Cillian moaned briefly against your breasts as you slipped your hand beneath the elastic, gently taking hold of his erection.

His cock was warm and firm and his tip slightly lubricated from the precum that had pooled there.

You moved your hand up and down his shaft, stroking him gently while his fingers began to circle over your clit, making you moan loudly.

Your panties were getting wetter and wetter with each stroke of his fingers and you were grinding against his hand, wanting more.

You were panting and moaning in pleasure as he kept stimulating you with his fingers, until, all of a sudden, me removed his hand making you squirm in protest.

His mouth soon wandered from your breasts down to your stomach, forcing you to let go of his hard cock.

But, as your body responded beneath his, your mind couldn't catch up to the events unfolding between the two of you.

You surrendered and let him take control and it wasn’t long until his lips had reached the top of your panties.

‘Oh god’ you moaned in anticipation just as Cillian took hold of both sides of your panties before slipping them down.

‘Do you want me to stop?’ he asked, unsure about your reaction.

‘No, please don’t’ you said, your hands falling onto the top of your head.

Admiring the view, Cillian let his fingers run up and down your slit slowly and gently, taking the juices leaking from it and spreading them up to the hood over your clit.

You moaned loudly at the sensation as, suddenly, you could feel Cillian’s tongue join his fingers, playfully darting closer to your opening, but not quite getting there.

‘Cillian, fuck’ you moaned as energy was coursing through your body, wanting to release, but not quite getting there. He apparently had received a masters degree in how to play your body.

Suddenly his tongue was there, licking up the sides of each of your lips. Inspecting the crevices.

Your head began to thrash, your hands flew out and grabbed the bedding.

‘Let me know if I hurt you’ was the next thing you heard but didn’t pay much attention to as you felt one of his fingers enter you.

With the mildest of discomfort, you arched your back while moan after moan left your mouth.

For several minutes, his finger went in and out of you gently while his tongue was licking you, circling over your clit.

He wasn’t sure whether or not to add another finger, but he decided to try his luck after reminding you to tell him if he hurts you in any way.

Moments later, he inserted a second finger while continuing to circle your clit with his tongue.

‘Oh fuck’ you moaned. There was a slight discomfort but it didn’t last very long before you felt nothing but pure pleasure.

Cillian’s fingers began rubbing inside of you as he placed his mouth around the hood of your clit and began to suck.

‘Holy Shit Cillian’ you moaned. You could feel him smile against your mound.

You began to squirm but he would not let up and your body began its final ascent.

Waves of electricity were crashing through you and your hips were grinding and bucking under his direct tutelage as your orgasm washed over you.

You were a shaking mess by the time he was done and, when you finally came down from your high, Cillian moved up and gave you a passionate kiss.

You could taste your juices on his lips and it was possibly the most erotic moment you had ever experienced.

‘Your turn’ you smirked before pushing Cillian onto his back against the stash of pillows.

You comment caused Cillian to chuckle just before you leaned over him to kiss him.

‘You know you don’t have to Y/N. There is no rush’ he said, running his hand over your cheek as your lips drifted apart.

‘But I want to’ you said with determination. ‘I might just need a little guidance’ you said shyly before descending down on his body, trailing gentle kisses over his chest and all the way down to his stomach.

You adored his body, it was perfect. He was the most attractive man you ever met.

As you were gently kissing his stomach, your hands moved beneath the rim of his briefs before pulling them down.

His erection sprung up almost instantly as soon as the briefs cam down and you couldn’t help but stare at him for a moment.

‘I think I will just go for it and you tell me if I do something wrong’ you said with a smile as you pinned back your hair into a bun with the hairband that was wrapped around your wrist.

Your comment made Cillian laugh for a moment until he could feel your warm lips on the tip of his cock, at which point the word ‘fuck’ was all that left his mouth.

Moans soon began to escape him as you used your hands to stroke him, up and down, while the head of his cock lolled uneasily on the top of your tongue.

You took him deeper into your mouth with every stroke and, as the third inch made its way into your mouth, your lips were being stretched.

You soon managed to take him in all the way, although it was a struggle.

‘Fuck, Y/N’ Cillian moaned as his length disappeared in your mouth.

His comment made you stop and ask whether something was wrong.

‘No, you are doing it perfectly’ Cillian reassured you just before you returned your attention to his very hard cock.

By this time precum had pooled on the tip as you took him back into your mouth. It tasted sweet but yet salty at the same time.

Your tongue began circling around him and then up and down his shaft before returning to the bopping motions.

Cillian leaned back and relaxed as you improved your technique minute by minute.

Each stroke of your tongue was now driving him crazy.

Looking up at him occasionally, you could see that he was enjoying whatever you were doing.

Your tongue was moving like a snake, coating every inch of his velvety soft, yet hard cock with a fine patina of sweet, warm saliva.

It wasn’t long until you could feel Cillian’s cock throb inside your mouth and his breathing was becoming laboured.

His hand was tangled up inside your hair as you continued to bop your head up and down firmly.

‘Y/N, I am close, you might want to stop’ Cillian said, trying hard to hold back.

‘Come in my mouth’ you said confidently before you continued your movements.

Your comment caught Cillian by surprise but he didn’t dare to argue and let go.

Just as your mouth bopped down on his hard shaft again, you could feel him pulsate inside your mouth and, with one loud groan, his warm cum spurted on the back of your tongue.

You continued to bop your head and collect all of his cum until he began to relax.

‘Did you just?’ Cillian asked, and before he could finish his question, you interrupted.

‘Swallow? Yes, what else do you normally do with it?’ you asked with a smirk.

‘I hate sleeping on dirty sheets and I was planning to stay the night, so that seemed like the best option’ you laughed before laid beside Cillian, his arms gently wrapping around you.

‘Hey, I am not complaining’ he laughed as he ran his hands gently over your arms.

‘Didn’t think so’ you said before kissing him again gently.

You fell asleep pretty soon afterwards, curled up against Cillian’s chest.

You both slept well and deep until, at 6am, Cillian’s alarm went off.

‘Oh goddam, what’s the time?’ you asked.

‘6am, why?’ Cillian said as you jumped out of the bed and collected your clothes, trying to put them on as quickly as you can.

‘Y/N, we don’t have a scene until 7am. There is plenty of time’ he said.

‘Yes, but Emma starts at 6.30am. She will notice me not being there’ you explained.

#cillian murphy #cillian murphy smut #Cillian Murphy x Reader #cillian murphy imagine #thomas shelby #Peaky Blinders

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veneli · 3 years

Note

hello hello!! for the redacted ask game; 11, 15, & 19? (hope you’re doing well and having a lovely day/night!!)

My night has been lovely, thank you! It is currently 12am PST and I have school tomorrow, but I can't sleep so here I am on tumblr *jazz hands*

@sweetheartmilo's request!

Hey!! Thanks for asking, both of you!

Both are very similar questions from the game, so I’ll put them together.

Spoilers for Avior's latest installment below!

11. Character(s) you want to know more about? FUCK, AVIOR. I NEED

But for real, after that last installment, and that deadly cliffhanger, even deadlier than his fall down to the first circle - I have perished and I am fighting the River's current. I was so invested in his storyline, and we kinda got pushed to the back burner a little bit for DAMN Season 2 and Inversion (no complaints, well, maybe a little grumble). Erik deserves a break. But gOd do I need Avior to survive rn. (New kind of d(a)emon: one that can only live off the energy of another d(a)emon. That would be very complicated)

15. What character(s) would you want to be friends with? To be frank there's many, but here's the ones that are definitely not 99% similar to my friends I have IRL. Huxley. and Lasko. and Elliott. and Geordi. Huxley: very huggable and is a nature freak (same), mountains person, will 100% steal hoodies and will ramble for hours about things he likes (I will listen 100%) and I need someone to yell at me to drink water.

Lasko: Anxiety bros! there's always something on our minds and we are equally distracted and stressed. Would lose a game of (insert video game) to 100%, I can't play to save my life, but I imagine it would be epic going against him. Also, I heard he likes bowling?? Count me IN.

Elliott: Dreamer, probably a Pisces (me too!!). Likes astrology, flirty, sweet, best friend type. Will stay up with him to look at the stars or just talk about random shit then fall asleep while he rambles because his voice is so calming and relaxing <3 (as the dreamwalker boyfriend, I wonder sometimes why he doesn't have a sleep aid yet...)

Geordi: CHOATIC. Overthinker, careless, forgetful, and brain all over the place (like me)! However goofy, will set boundaries and respect with every ounce of his being. He's like the kind to hug you from behind and the type to run and crash for a hug and I live for that. We can be stupid together and not give a damn.

19. Which character(s) are you most similar to?

I would like to say a cross between Asher and Damien. (I know, what?) High standards like the both of them, having both a serious side (Damien) and a fun side (Asher), Loyal to a cause and my friends and family, responsible in school and tries to be on top of things. Take on high responsibility and do my best to fulfill what my superiors ask of me and my own standards. Stubborn like Damien, and conscious of when I need breaks.

34. What was your first Redacted video you listened to? It was a Vincent audio! I joined the fandom about 10 months ago, in May of 2021, just as DAMN S1 was closing up with the non-canon DAMN boy confessions. I just started getting into ASMR content, and I was drawn towards the supernatural and fantasy, then I was lucky enough to have Erik grace my feed with "Found By a Flirty Vampire". HIS FIRST EVER VIDEO ON REDACTED. HOW LUCKY!!

youtube

After that video I was like, "yo, this Vincent guy is pretty nice, I WANT MORE" and Lo and Behold, there was an entire fucking library of other supernatural stuff with DAMN 1 ending and the Shifters getting started.

To be honest, I didn't listen to the Ivan "Yandere boy takes you" or the Project Meridian storyline because I'm not too fond of Yandere content and I don't like the overload of personal attention, so I kind of missed out on content from that.

I spent maybe 1-2 weeks catching up and binging all the videos (aside from Ivan and Marcus) from start to finish, including the non-canon game of matchmakers. Waited (impatiently) for The Cost and wondering why Vega was being a dick (realizing later it had connections to Ivan's story).

As you can see, I fell into a spiral and an obsession with supernatural/magical ASMR content and I have never left Redacted since then. I was so caught up with everything already that when Eri hosted the channel trivia for Channel-versary I could answer 80% of the questions.

Cruised through summer and into the Games Prep arc, tiptoed quietly through Imperiem-tober and got scared of a few characters (ehem, Sam, Asher, Huxley, Lasko), Games day arc, then you know what happened. I cried, a lot.

and here's a bonus because I really wanted to answer this one lmao: 23. What kind of Empowered would you be? (ex. Elemental, Energetics, Freelancer, Shifter, Dreamwalker, Deathwalker, Seer, Vampires..ect)

Several personality tests say werewolf Shifter, and I'd say I agree. Pretty loyal (if i do say so myself), I like responsibility, my favourite animals are wolves (no bias), and they're gentle creatures when unprovoked (it's another story when they are). However I think it would be soooo cool to be a Fire Elemental or a Dreamwalker. Fire because, yeahhh arsON I'm always cold and if I can make my own heat/absorb heat that would be great thank you. A Dreamwalker because I'd like to experience how the inside of someone's mind works while they sleep. How the brain comes up with the weirdest scenarios ever, while rearranging memories. Psychology and psychiatry seem pretty interesting from inside the mind.

(I suppose telepath could also work, but with Dreamwalking you get the image and the art rather than just sound and voice.)

#eli’s requests #eli’s rambling #redacted asmr

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jamie-leah · 3 years

Text

War of Wolves (19)

Season 1

Episode 19 - The Search Begins

Bucky x Reader

Summary: You have been on the streets for the past two years, ever since your accident that left you with the ability to tell if someone is lying. You work as an informant for the white wolf and his mob but you had never met him…until you overhear a phone call that leads you to saving his life. Now he wants you to work for him. Its an offer you couldn’t refuse…right?

Word Count: 2530

Warnings: Violence, injuries, manhandling, medical talk, swearing, POV Changes

A/N: Here's another! Late as usual I know, but my life has taken an unexpected turn. However, lets hope these updates will not be more regular. There will be POV changes and I know Bucky's part is third person but I call it Bucky's POV because it's easier for everyone to follow! Enjoy Lovelies! Feedback is always encouraged!

<---Previous Episode Next Episode--->

WoW Masterlist Series Masterist Oneshot Masterlist

BUCKY’S POV

There’s a pounding in his head that hasn’t stopped since the crash. As his senses start to come back Bucky notices, he’s lying on concrete, the cold seeping into his bones.

About the same time, he realises he’s on the floor he remembers what happened. Bucky shoots up from the floor, causing dizziness but he didn’t care. The only thought he had was you.

As Bucky looks around, he sees the chair you were in empty and the room also empty. Morning had started to break, and he curses himself for losing precious hours.

As Bucky starts to make his way out of the building his body aches as his head keeps pounding in time with his heart.

He finally finds an exit and walks until he comes to a main road. Bucky looks around and breathes a sigh of relief that he knows where he is. With no phone or anything to communicate with anyone, Bucky walks.

He follows the main road as his thoughts race. He can’t help picturing you with Isaac and it makes him sick. The worry for you and the anger at himself and Isaac is almost enough to bring him to his knees, but he said he would find you and he would. He would die before he ever stopped looking.

Bucky felt like he had been walking forever but it was probably only about twenty-five minutes. The older building coming into view. He picks up the pace until he comes to the gates.

Bucky walks right in catching the eye of two men. They look at each other alarmed by the way he looks but Bucky simply says, “go get him”.

The one runs off as the other stays by the gate. Bucky keeps walking afraid that if he stops, he won’t be able to get back up.

As Bucky reaches the door Darren steps out looking concerned. Bucky clenches his jaw before saying, “I need your help”.

YOUR POV

You’re cold. You smell damp. You hear murmuring.

You shift and groan as your eyes protest being opened. You feel what must be springs digging into your back as you make sense of what you’re seeing.

Its quite a dark room, the ceiling old brick and as you follow it the walls are brick too. You sit up fast and groan. You notice you’re sitting on a mattress and metal frame.

You stand up and gasp as your bare feet touch stone. When you get over the shock you notice metal bars covering an archway, the only exit to this room.

It took you a while to comprehend what you were seeing but you finally realised that you were in a dungeon. You’re incredibly confused as voices get louder.

You walk closer to the bars, your feet becoming numb due to the cold until two figures step into view. It doesn’t take you long to see that its Harry and Isaac.

You look at the both of them, “where the hell am I?”.

Harry’s British accent comes out loud in the small space, “This is an estate of mine. I had a lot of extra room here, so I let Isaac renovate a few of his labs here”.

You screw up your face, “am I in a dungeon?”.

Harry chuckles, “my estate is essentially a castle, this place has many hidden places, this small dungeon being one”.

Isaac speaks next, watching you carefully, “no one knows you’re here. It’s just me, Harry and one of my men. The rest of the men don’t know you’re here, so Bucky definitely doesn’t know you’re here. Don’t cause me any trouble”.

You hold his gaze lifting your chin, “he’ll find me”.

Isaac smirks, “no. He won’t”. That’s when he pushes some type of clothing through the bars, “wear that. I have some initial tests I want to run as soon as possible. If you don’t have it on by the time my man comes to get you, he’ll put it on you himself”.

Without another word from either of them they leave. You pick up the clothing and see that it’s a hospital gown.

Its freezing in the room due to the stone so you don’t really want to put it on, but you don’t want to risk anyone else putting it on for you. You strip and quickly put the gown on. You sit on the edge of the bed and wait.

BUCKY’S POV

Darren didn’t even blink when he agreed to help in any way he could. The first thing that Bucky did was call Steve.

“Hello?”, Steve’s voice sounded tired, strained.

Bucky was just relieved to hear his voice, “Steve, its Bucky-“.

Steve interrupts him, “Bucky?! Where are you?! Are you hurt? I saw the car-“.

Bucky just manages to get out, “Steve, he took her”.

There was a heavy silence for a few moments, “where are you?”.

Bucky’s head was still hurting, “Darren’s”.

“Me and Sam will be there as soon as we can”, Steve waits a second before hanging up.

Darren comes back with a woman with a full looking rack. Bucky just sits there on Darren expensive looking sofa.

She comes over without a word and starts attending to the cut on Bucky’s head. Darren sits opposite Bucky and waits for the woman to finish. Before she leaves, she hands Bucky some tablets and water.

As Bucky takes them, Darren asks, “What happened Buck?”.

Bucky stares into space picturing the events as he tells Darren, “Isaac ambushed me and Y/N. I didn’t even see it coming. Rammed straight into us. I held em’ off as much as I could but there were too many of them and Y/N refused to run”.

Darren’s eyebrows raise, “brave woman”.

Bucky’s mouth twitches despite the circumstances, “stubborn woman…He took us to a warehouse about half hour from here. He was gonna kill me, but Y/N convinced him not to. He knocked me out and took her”.

Darren’s jaw clenched, “what do you need from me?”.

YOUR POV

It took about twenty minutes for you to hear footsteps and for another figure to come up to the bars. You can’t make much out other than he’s blonde and tall.

He opens the bar door and his gruff voice comes out, “move”.

“Where’s my please?”, you don’t know if its you being brave, stubborn, or stupid, but the comment comes out just the same.

The guy comes marching in and grabs your arm. He yanks so hard that your cry echoes in the room and you’re afraid he’ll rip it out of the socket.

You fight against him, fear of what Isaac has in store finally kicking in. But it doesn’t matter, you can’t get a grip with your bare feet and your punches bounce off him.

He leads you down narrow corridors and you lose track until he stops abruptly at a wooden door. He opens it one handed and drags you in.

Its like you stepped into a different reality. The room was white, and the floor was tiled. It was like you had entered a hospital. It made the knot in your stomach tighten painfully.

Isaac was sitting at a desk in a white coat. Your eyes slide from him to the glass window in front of him that looked into a room with an MRI machine.

Isaac talks with his back still to you, “put her on the table”.

The man starts backing you up, but you keep resisting. You manage to clip the guy in the face, his grip loosening enough to break free for only a second. Before you can get very far, he pulls you by your hair and throws you into the table.

Your stomach collides with the edge of the table and knocks the wind right out of your lungs. You double over and end up falling to the floor trying to suck in air.

Isaac doesn’t even care. He just walks over calmly as you struggle to breathe and injects something into your arm. You don’t remember anything after that.

BUCKY’S POV

The pounding in his head hadn’t stopped. The dizziness was still there, but Bucky couldn’t keep still. He was pacing in front of Darren worrying about you and wondering how he was going to find you.

There was a knock on the door that made Bucky turn around in his pacing. One of Darren’s workers had guided Steve and Sam to the room.

Steve took big strides over to Bucky, pulling him into a hug, closely followed by Sam. When Sam steps back he says, “we’re gonna get her back”.

Steve nods before asking, “what happened?”.

So, Bucky tells them everything. Once Bucky finishes Steve asks, “you got people on the inside, right? You planted people in Isaac’s organisation a while ago?”.

Bucky nods, “I’ll reach out to them, ask if they’ve seen her or heard anything about where he’s got her. There were also cameras at the warehouse he took us to, pull the footage and see if it tells us something”.

Sam holds his hand up, “we’ll do all of that and whatever else you need us to do, but we need to take you back and get you some medical attention”.

Bucky starts to shake his head, but Steve talks next, “Sam’s right. You can reach out to your informants in the car on the way back home, but you need to get your head checked out. You’re no good to Y/N if you’re injured”.

Bucky nods frustrated with how right they were and how much time its going to waste, “okay, lets get moving then”.

Bucky starts moving towards the door and everyone follows. Steve and Sam get in the car and Bucky follows. Before he closes the door, Darren says, “I’ve got a few people I can reach out to. I’ll let you know if I hear anything”.

Bucky nods, grateful, before slamming the door. Sam hands him a phone to start making calls as Steve speeds back home.

YOUR POV

It was like you were repeating history. You wake up groggy again and you shift as springs dig into your back.

You take in your cell and start to get up before the world tilts causing you to crash back onto the bed. That’s when Isaac speaks, making your heart race, “you’re going to feel dizzy and you’ll probably throw up soon. I need you to rest because I’ll need to take a few more tests in a few hours”.

You manage to murmur, “fuck you”.

Isaac chuckles, “the harder you fight the more I’m going to enjoy breaking your spirit. There’s a bucket in the corner of the room for when you throw up”.

You listen to his footsteps walking away, loud to the throbbing of your head. You try focusing on your breathing, but it wasn’t long before you felt saliva flood your mouth and your stomach clench.

You stumble out of bed and towards the corner. You nearly fall two times before making it to the bucket and heaving. Not much comes out as you stay hunched over the bucket for about half an hour just heaving.

By the time it stops your body is shaking and you have to crawl back over to the bed. You get back on and curl in on yourself, falling asleep to forget.

BUCKY’S POV

By the time they get back to the house Bucky has got in touch with everyone that he can think of, but it still doesn’t feel like enough.

He gets out the car more frustrated than ever and once inside he makes a beeline for the office. That is until Steve blocks his path, “I don’t think so. Med wing. Now”.

Bucky doesn’t fight as Steve escorts him towards the medical wing. He asks softly, “how is Peggy doing? I can’t believe I missed everything”.

Steve smiles, “she’s doing great. She’s at the safe house with the kids thinking of a name for our boy as we speak”.

Bucky nods, lost in thoughts, “good, that’s good”.

Steve looks over concerned, “Buck…”.

Bucky reaches for the med wing doors, “go and get the footage from the warehouse and get in contact with anyone I missed in the car while I get my head sorted”. Bucky didn’t give Steve a chance to say or ask whatever he was going to say as he lets the doors close.

YOUR POV

You wake to the noise of the barred door scrapping against the stone floor. You don’t move from your foetal position on the bed.

It’s the blonde guy again, “move”.

Your body still feels weak and shaky. When your voice comes out you don’t recognise it, “go fuck yourself”.

You hear his heavy steps approaching and you brace yourself. Again, he yanks your arm and pulls you off the bed. You don’t expect it and can’t catch yourself in time before your hip and knee collide with the stone floor.

You yelp as pain radiates along your leg. As you try breathing through the pain, he takes advantage and manages to carry you most of the way without much fight from you.

He drops you on the table in the room and Isaac is waiting with another syringe. He wastes no time in using it as you feel the sting in your arm.

They both step back and you start to get off the table, but your limbs don’t listen. You try moving your legs, but you go nowhere. You try moving your arms but still you’re staring at the white ceiling.

Panic starts clawing in your chest as your eyes dart around the room as much as they can. You can feel the cool table underneath you but despite all your strength you can’t even make your fingers twitch.

You even go to ask Isaac what he did but your mouth wouldn’t open. Fear was gripping your racing heart as you hear your blood in your ears like the sea raging on the shore.

Isaac comes into view with a smile, “try not to panic, it wouldn’t do me any favours if you died. I needed to do an MRI with you awake, but I imagined you wouldn’t lay still for me, so I thought I’d make you”.

He nods to the blonde guy and he picks you up. He takes you into the next room and places you on the machine.

During the entire process you try to move, but nothing worked. The loss of control and feeling of helplessness made breathing difficult.

You decided to just close your eyes and picture Bucky. You picture him healthy and in one of his black suits. You try and imagine what he would say to you now. He’d probably cup your face and make your eyes look at his and say, “you’re strong, smart, and stubborn. I know you can do this until I get there, you just need to breathe Doll. Just breathe for me. I will find you”.

It was only when you opened your eyes that you realised a tear had escaped down the side of your cheek and into your hair.

WoW Taglist: @a-really-bi-girl @crazyblonde124 @summerwelsh @scuzmunkie @loving-life-my-way @pequenaguaxinim @paranoid-borderline-insane @lilsonbucky @somanyfandomsblog @broco8 @inquisitor-selvala @mad-red @k-n-e @rinkashirikitateku @duhh-danielly @boundtomyfate @kalesrebellion @booktease21 @whatinthyworld @flyingbabyunicornnamedangel @asapkyndall @yaszx @amoredashley @aveatquevale- @putinovertime @melimelbean @valsworldofcreativity @lokilokilokilokilokilokilo-blog1 @vesper852 @littlenerdgirl16

#bucky #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky x you #bucky fandom #bucky series #bucky fic #bucky x y/n #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #mob!bucky #mob!au

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betweentheracks · 4 years

Note

On a scale of 1-5000, how annoyed do you get when people have the gall to tell you, “Wow! You’re so lucky!” when they find out that you work in entertainment and with celebrities?

Also on a scale of 1-5000, how unimpressed are you with the celebrities you end up working with?

Please share some horror stories so we can commiserate over nightmare clients! 😂

Yeef and also yikes, do I actually want to dive into this particular can of worms? Lmao.

I thoroughly see spots of red in my vision whenever people try to do the whole “Wow, that’s really cool and lucky for you! How many famous people have you met or worked with? Your life must be so glamorous and exciting!!” Like please, spare me. It isn’t glitz and glitter all the time - in fact, the fun parts are in the minority of how working in this industry goes. Beyond that, I’m not ‘lucky,’ I worked my ass off to pull this off and have never slowed my pace (until this COVID-19 chaos) to ensure my post remains relevant. In accordance to your ranking, I guess I would go with 4999 points annoyed.

Frankly, my rating and impressions of my clients are like a river that flows on and on and yet there is no apparent water to be found. I have a good rapport with most of the ones I am contracted with exclusively, but they're prone to make my feelings change from sentence to the next. Celebrities will forever remain exhaustively effervescent.

If you really want some dish, I can offer up some from a client I once worked with in my apprenticeship and how much I hate the time I had to spend with her while also retaining a sense of gratitude for helping shape me into someone that can withstand some of the prickly goings-on of the industry. She wasn’t even my client, as I was merely apprenticing and therefore was little more than a ghost that shadowed one of the veterans of our company. I’m highlighting this now before diving into the thick of what was the worst week in my career thus far because it is extremely important to keep in mind that I was under no actual obligation to work with this woman.

Ahem, so, story time! Let me start off with first making it clear that even now I will only work with actresses and actors when I have no viable means of refusal. This is simply a preference of mine and stems mostly from this woman’s behaviors and treatments of me and some of the crew I worked with at the time. I was quite young when I entered my apprenticeship, like barely more than 20, and I was simultaneously accustomed and starstruck by the world I was entering. Before the apprenticeship, I had already been working off and on via temporary contracts and commissions as a MUA at the time, so I knew the ends and outs of the place and the people that worked my end of it. However, I hadn’t worked with many clients one on one as either a MUA or as an aspiring wardrobe stylist. Due to this I was still very green and awkward and hadn’t yet figured out the line between casual and professional (to this day, for me, this line is nearly nonexistent) and I tended to make a mess whenever I opened my mouth so mostly I kept quiet and melded into my role as an observing trainee with occasionally useful ideas but was mostly just an extra pair of hands. The stylist I was shadowing was, in a word, cumbersome. They weren’t a very great teacher and had a tendency to drop projects into my lap without much proper instruction or insight and would leave me to attempt making sense of what was wanted by means of vision boards and client portfolios. In much a similar fashion, when a scheduling conflict came up involving the actress which will star in this tale and another more major artist; naturally, he had to see to the client he had a more tangible contract with and stuck me with wrangling our golden girl.

Within the first 4 sentences of our first exchange as stylist and client I hated her immensely. She was the type of client I abhor to work with; overbearing and demanding, thankless and impatient. She was in the midst of her career finally catching some interest which is the most pivotal time in any celebrity’s career and I like to think she was so bitchy and just plain mean due to the stress and pressure she was under but it doesn’t make what happened any more justifiable. Her immediate and first words to me were, “You’re young and clueless enough to be my baby sister. Whatever authority you think you can have in dictating what I wear ended with the sound of the door opening when you stepped in, get that straight now.” I remember this extremely clearly because I went from gobsmacked to incensed within the time it takes to pop the top on a can of soda. But! I knew at least enough to know to keep my mouth shut and temper my immediate dislike of this person and tried to push forward and steer the conversation in the direction of what her ideal style and presentation should be. It went well enough for all of an hour tops before she domed me again by calling me “baby sis” in place of my name. As I am, in fact, the baby sis of my family I am well aware of when a power play is being maneuvered in on me and spotted this for what it was: her trying to remind me that I had no right to be speaking to her, let alone designing her. This was a culmination of her being upset and put out that she wasn’t chosen by my mentoring stylist and was stuck with someone that had basically no merits behind her.

Calling me this wasn’t really an issue for me, but it did chafe against my skin enough to make me feel uncomfortable and anxious. Still, I let it slide and she continued to call me as such for the duration of our time together. The true horror of this story is what comes next and the escalation from minor verbal insults meant to belittle me fanned into blatant sabotage. She and I had come to a sort of estranged agreement when it came to modeling her vision board - she wanted to retain some traces of her perceived sweet and demure self from when she was cast in her first role, but play up the maturity and grace she held now and have it reinvented into timeless class while holding a touch of being chic. It was a headache to make sense of since, from a the perspective of fashion and trends at that time, this wasn’t the ideal and even seemed counterintuitive to someone in her position and of her age. I went along with it and threw myself into the quest to pull from the brands she mentioned liking most and for days I learned firsthand how exhausting and tedious it is to make acquisitions and swear responsibilities/accountabilities one after the other and put my name and my company on the line. I handpicked every item and steadily managed to pull off forming my second ever ensemble of 4 sets of styles each with 2 or 3 substitution items that could alter the look entirely while still remaining within the realm of what the client had asked for. I worked upward of 13 hours for 4 days and when I finally was able to bring the client to her showroom and present my designs, I was only able to feel relieved for mere minutes before she began to yell and make a scene. She demanded my supervisor and the head of the styling department of our company both come to tend to her and see what a mockery I had made of her ideal image. She went on to use her acting quirks to insinuate that I had gone off half-cocked and overruled her every idea and word and then dared to present her with such low quality fashions. She even managed to produce a vision board that was entirely different from the one she and I had planned together! It was obviously done by herself and lacked the detailed attention any of the stylists housed in our company would have added, but it was convincing enough to appear damning.

At this point my head was in a weird place, trying to make sense of the perilous world I was throwing myself into and the fact that this was actually happening to me at all and wasn’t just me daydreaming while watching daytime dramas. After I worked through that initial shock, I was more than mad but less than enraged. I was confused as to why this client was being so purposefully obstinate and difficult for me, even briefly wondered what sort of grievance I could have possibly cost her when I had only just met her and had done my utmost to seem cool and pro like all the seasoned stylists I had worked with. I thought I was going to lose my job and have to go back to my family with my tail between my legs and tell them they were right and I never should have strayed from my original course and career path. I only became aware that I was crying, like big fat tears that made a mess of my face and were embarrassing to the point that I wanted to flee, because my supervisor had given me his handkerchief. It was at this point that I teetered and looked deeply at the person accusing me and wasting my time and efforts and realized that it wasn’t about me and was only ever about her. This moment of clarity, though, was like the opening of a gate I had been clinging to all week in hopes of keeping all my spurned senses quietly simmering beneath my skin rather than wreck my name and finish off my chances before they truly begun. I very rudely told my supervisor and the department head that if they needed proof of my hardwork and dedication to the vision of a thoughtless actress caught in the weeds of her own wilting fame then they were free to examine my copy of the original vision board and compare it with the one she had; that they could check through the 15 or so LORs under my name and in her stead (both names are featured for security means). Anyway, she was attempting to spill a stain across our company and specifically the stylist in charge of me for blowing her off. Her idea was that if I failed in a big way it would make him look like a horrible mentor and cost him some of his reputation. I was merely cannon fodder.

This got insanely long - let’s put it up to me also being a storyteller and writer as well as very passionate about this encounter. It sparked the timid embers of my uncertain pursuit of my career into a fire that has since gotten me through many other rounds of hard hitting clients and their excessive personalities and entitled arrogance. I love my job a lot, but man is this industry full of bullies.

#peekbackstage #style asks #style speak #anyway now i adamantly avoid working with the acting crowd and my life is a lot more simple

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therealcalicali · 4 years

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Lillesøster - Krigen: Chapt 16

Chapter 16 Warnings: Angst, Deception, Violence and Intrigue

Word Count: 8,102

Setting: Viking Era

Genre: Romance/Drama/Epic

Pairing: Ragnarssons x Reader, Alfred x Reader, Aethelred x Reader (No details because it would spoil the story)

Read Season 1: Here

Catch Up: Chap 1 Chap 2 Chap 3 Chap 4

Chap 5 Chap 6 Chap 7 Chap 8 Chap 9

Chap 10 Chap 11 Chap 12 Chap 13

Chap 14 Chap 15 Chapter 17

Chapter 18 Chapter 19

You and Alfred had barely passed the threshold of the Great Hall when a large hand grasped at your wrist. When you turned, it was none other than your father. With a crooked smirk, he eyed you with peculiar interest.

“Birdie, come and greet your father.”

Instantly, you let go of your husband’s arm and embraced Ragnar.

And in that moment, he was your entire world. Because not only had he proven himself a loving parent over time, he had led your War. Something he was not obligated to do, despite you being blood relations. Because truth be told, Ragnar set aside his own kingdom concerns for your sake.

Indeed, he left Kattegat under the rule of a proxy just to Command your armies. Something he had never done under any circumstances. Thus, there was no amount of coin that could compensate for such devotion.

“You do not know how happy I am.” You whispered as the embrace continued. “I prayed for everyone morning and night. But mostly, you.”

“That is a fortunate thing. Because your prayers will counteract Aslaug’s own.” Ragnar replied with a hint of amusement.

He then kissed the top of your head.

After letting go, he quickly added that your stepmother hated him. So much in fact, that she had barely looked at him since their arrival. Obviously, the comment did not sit well with you. Because despite knowing that their marriage was on shaky ground, you still felt hopeful. For that reason, you snatched the horn of mead from his hand.

Stunned by your actions, Alfred raised a brow. However, he remained silent and kept to your side.

“Father, please attempt to be amiable. No matter the problem, it is not insurmountable.” You implored. “Besides, you have only just returned. So let there be peace between you.”

“The only peace there will be, are pieces of Ragnar scattered throughout this castle.” Rollo interrupted with a chuckle. He then shoved his brother aside. “Trust me, Y/N. If a mere look could kill, your father would be dead already.”

Your Uncle then put a massive arm about you and pulled you close.

Defeated by their inane laughter, you could only look between them. Apparently, neither man seemed keen on taking your words seriously. But then again, they were having their fill of King Garrat’s imported spirits. Thus, you could not expect much.

“Your belly has expanded a great deal.” Ragnar noted before setting his palm to the rounded bulge. “It’s as if you have a fleet of ships in there.”

“Father, please! I tire of people speaking as if I am made of stone.” You replied, your brow sewn together in annoyance. “Everyone makes me feel as if I am the size of a cow.”

With a repentant expression, Ragnar rubbed your belly and declared he was only jesting. Furthermore, he insisted that he was not referring to your body as a whole. But rather, how much the baby had grown. Amused by this, you acknowledge the fact. Because despite your sentiments, there was no denying that your belly was massive.

“What of the Healers?” Ragnar asked with a glint of concern in his eyes. “Have they said that you are both doing well?”

With a nod, you assured your father that everything was going as expected.

In fact, your numerous symptoms had greatly reduced. So much in fact, that you had taken to practicing Archery with King Garrat. Naturally, this drew satisfied chuckles from Ragnar and Rollo. But Alfred was not so keen.

In fact, he looked at you with some disapproval.

Though the Prince was accustomed to your willful proclivities, he assumed being with child would improve things. But apparently, he was greatly mistaken. In spite of his displeasure however, Alfred chose to keep his opinion to himself.

Because one thing he had learned, was to choose his battles well.

“Take more, Y/N.” Floki declared as he pushed a platter of roasted pheasant toward you. “It is said that hearty foods are good for women in your condition.”

But despite enjoying your Uncle’s company, you nearly cringed.

Typically, you enjoyed such delicacies. However, the smell of the meat instantly turned your stomach. Thus, you passed it to a nearby servant and asked that she take it away.

“Do not tell me you are going to vomit.”

“I will if you keep passing dishes over.”

With a chuckle Floki patted your hand and apologized. Though he meant well, he had no idea how bad you had it. Adding that his late wife had gone through the same. Naturally, you were intrigued by this. Because despite him being unattached, you had been told that the Shipbuilder was once married.

“Helga was quite like you in temperament. And when she was expecting our first child, she became even worse. Any time I returned from a hunt; she would glare at me. Always insisting I dress my kills them far from the longhouse or else.”

“And would you?”

“Of course. I mean, it was best to do it at a nearby friends home than to risk being attacked.”

“Of come off it, Uncle.” You said with a laugh. “I am certain that she did not mean a word of those threats. Truth be told, being with child can make one quite moody.”

A bittersweet smile crossed Floki’s face.

Indeed, there was much you did not know. Mostly, that his enigmatic personality was actually a shield from reality. Because the Shipbuilder had yet to finish mourning his wife and daughter.

“Tell me more of her.”

“Come now, Y/N. There is no need to bore you with tales of the past. Besides, those things happened before you were born. All of it, lost to the Northern winds.”

Despite his protesting, you insisted. Declaring that you wished to hear of his life just as you had done with Rollo. A name you knew would trigger Floki to do as asked. Because one thing he disliked, was being upstaged by your belligerent Uncle.

Thus, the Shipbuilder began regaling you with the ghosts of things long forgotten.

“Well, someone say something. How shall we tell her?” Gunni asked, tipping his horn of mead.

Bjorn, Sigurd and Ubbe then exchanged glances, none exactly sure of how to respond. But there was one thing they all knew for certain.

That you had to be told the truth. And that it was best done sooner, than later.

“A wise man once said, “The straightforward approach is always best.” Gunni said thoughtfully. “Thus, there is no reason to attempt to shield Y/N from the news. Because knowing her temperament, beating about the bush will only incur her wrath.”

Alfred paused at the suggestion whilst the others continued to discuss things further.

Being your husband, everyone had agreed that he would have the final say. However, in spite of this, the Prince was still apprehensive about saying anything at all. For he knew one thing was certain. You would surely lose your temper, no matter how the subject was approached.

“Alfred, you have said nothing.” Bjorn said. “If you cannot handle things, I can tell her myself. After all, she is my sister.”

“I am capable of speaking to my own wife.” Alfred countered, his tone one of contemplative concern. “But you must remember, she is with child. For that reason, I am in no rush to upset her.”

“No one begrudges you of that concern. However, you do not know Y/N as we do. She is more resilient than you may believe.” Sigurd interjected as Hvitserk nodded in agreement.

Like your husband, your brothers were also anxious about your condition. But what had to be done, could not be avoided. Thus, Sigurd added that you were not the type to overlook dishonesty. Even it was meant to spare your feelings.

So as the men ended the discussion, it was decided that Bjorn would be the one to approach you.

“I would like to be present as well. Y/N may need me.” Alfred said, as the others went their way.

With a shrug, your eldest brother declared that he was welcome to do as he pleased. However, he suggested that your husband prepare himself for the worst. Because one thing the Ragnarssons had learned over time, was that your anger rivaled only that of Ragnar’s.

Whilst Aethelred was sat, busily replying to a long-held correspondence from Wessex, Cassandra entered.

The Lady had been patiently awaiting her husband’s presence in the Great Hall. But after some time of sitting alone and listening to others converse, she had her fill. Thus, she thought it best to go in search of her absentee spouse.

But when he heard the door to the small study close, Aethelred seemed unaffected by her presence.

“What is it?” He asked, barely looking up from the papers before him. “I am in the midst of a pressing matter.”

“Is that how you greet me now?” Cassandra asked as her pleasant smile turned to an expression of vexation. Crossing her hands over her chest, the young woman then glared at the elder Saxon Prince. “Since the arrival of your convoy, you have yet to send for me. But even as I welcome you, there is no semblance of enthusiasm. In fact, you behave as if we have not been apart for weeks on end.”

“For the love of God. Did you come in here simply to chew at my ear? If so, I suggest you save your breath. Because as you can see, I’m focused on important matters.”

“Important, he says.” Cassandra scoffed, her eyes setting upon his in anger. Perhaps Aethelred did not feel the weight of so many women being with child, but she did. “And what is more important than us starting a family?”

As his fist hit the desk with a great thud, Aethelred finally looked at his wife.

Truly, the words cut him to the core. So much in fact, he could barely contain the anger that now frothed deep within him. For one thing Cassandra did not understand was that he was not made of stone. Yes, the Prince did in fact want a family all his own.

However, he also had other troubles festering in his homeland. The kind that threatened to change the very course of his life. Thus, arguing with the wife he had yet to fall for, did little to bring him comfort.

“You are exactly like my mother. Always speaking without forethought or wisdom.” Aethelred seethed through tense jaw. “You behave as if I enjoy my current lot in life. Do you suppose I was gladdened at being betrothed at the last minute? Our vows, nothing more than an afterthought? Do you think such facts enable me to sleep at night?”

“I…………………….” Cassandra stammered. As she searched for the right words, her courage began to fail her. “That is not what I meant.”

“Then what did you mean? Because ever since you appeared in my life, you are always at my heels. If it not complaints, its advising me to do one thing or another. And frankly, I have grown tired. I will not placate someone that behaves like the woman who ruined my life!”

With great reluctance, the Lady held her skirts as her mind raced.

Though they had not been married long, Cassandra was actually fond of her husband. For that reason, she did not retreat from the Study. Instead, she apologized once more before confessing that she was only frustrated at not being with child.

Unfortunately, her words did little to improving things. Because the declaration instantly caused Aethelred’s gaze to go cold.

“So, you wish to become a mother.” He said with a peculiar nod. “That is good to know. Because I too have always dreamt of becoming a father. However, none of those thoughts ever included you. So if you are done ruining what little peace I still possess, we shall speak another time.”

Had it not been for her upbringing, Cassandra’s knees would have lost their strength.

Indeed, nothing in her entire life had hurt more. Not that she did not understood Aethelred’s feelings. After all, he had been madly in love prior to their betrothal. But the Lady had always believed that they were establishing something of their own. And in time, the Prince would come to treat her as a true wife.

Thus, she never expected Aethelred to speak with such indifference.

“I…………………..I shall return to the Great Hall.” Cassandra stammered, her heart beating so fast, she swore he could hear it. “And before I forget, your father asked of you twice. He said there is much for the two of you to discuss.”

“Halt!” A broad-shouldered guard bellowed. He then approached the party before him as another raised a torch aloft. “It is half past midnight already. Therefore, no one shall pass unless there is urgent business at hand.”

With some frustration, Sir Mansfeld’s men grumbled.

After a long journey from the encampments, they now dreamed of only their beds. That and perhaps some much needed food. Thus, they looked to their Master, hoping the evenings’ work would not be prolonged.

As expected, the arrogant Knight curtly declared that he wished to speak to Sir Ronan. Adding that the meeting could not wait for the morning.

Because despite what he had once believed, Sir Mansfeld’s chance meeting with Ivar had proven beneficial. For your brother had done him a considerable favor. Something he hoped would regain Dorian’s favor.

It was a desperate gamble, of course. But one worth making since your cousin no longer favored House Kensington. In fact, he had taken to calling them a “Den of traitors”. Thus, Ivar handing over a useful prisoner, was quite welcomed.

Nevertheless, your brother had not helped Sir Mansfeld out of benevolence. Because he too benefited from the transaction.

“I understand the urgency, Milord.” One of the elder Guardsmen declared. “But unless you give good reason, I cannot wake our Master.”

“If I am not allowed to see Sir Ronan, I shall dismount and cut you all down.” Sir Mansfeld proclaimed, tired of being kept waiting. “Because as I have said already, my purpose is for his eyes and ears only. So, what shall it be?”

“Alfie, you are being quite strange this evening.” You remarked as the Prince moved about the Library. “Did you lure me from the feast for a specific reason? Or are we simply here to admire King Garrat’s trinkets?”

Though he tried, the Prince could not bring himself to force a smile. So instead, he picked up a crystal figurine, examining it before looking at you.

“What is it?” You asked with a raised brow. “If you are hiding a present, please do not keep me waiting. Because you know I detest surprises.”

But before your husband could mumble a response, Bjorn entered.

Obviously, you were a bit confused as to why your brother was there. Especially since the revelry in the Great Hall had not become quite raucous. Thus, you asked if he too was on in Alfred’s little game.

Confused by the query, Bjorn glanced at Alfred, the two exchanging glances. But this only caused you to grow frustrated by the strange behavior. So instead of asking more questions, you walked to your husband and snatched the figurine from his hand.

“I insist that you tell me what is going on. Or else, I will not speak to you the rest of the night.” You said with a furrowed brow. “I detest feeling as if you are both plotting something.”

“Y/N, calm yourself. There is nothing afoot.” Bjorn said as he looked at you with sincerity. “However, we do have something to inform you of. So if you will please take a seat--------”

“I will do no such thing. Whatever I must hear, can be done whilst I’m upon my feet.”

It was then you noticed Alfred’s gaze change to one of great concern.

For that reason, you demanded that your husband and brother speak. Because not only was your patience wearing thin, but you had no intentions of sitting. Obviously, both men were quite apprehensive. But invariably, they understood that little could be done once your mind was made.

Thus, Bjorn approached, not simply to keep his words from prying ears. But he wished to catch you, should your strength falter.

“Sister, I will not belabor the message.” He said. “Despite winning nearly every battle and routing Dorian’s forces, not everything is perfect. Because during a scouting mission, Lancille and his men were ambushed.”

Instantly, you felt nauseous. As you grasped onto Bjorn’s arm, Alfred dragged a chair over and asked that you sit. This time, you obliged.

“Wha……………………………what do you mean?” You stammered as your brother’s words raced through your mind. “Where is he?”

“Love, please.” Alfred pleaded. “If you do not take care, you will upset yourself and the baby.”

Though you wanted to snap at him, the Prince was correct. The last thing you wanted was to put your unborn child in danger. Thus, you took a moment to compose yourself. After letting out a deep breath, you looked to Bjorn again.

“Please do not spare my feelings. Because the good Lord knowns that Lancille has endured much for my sake.” You said with gravity. “So, is he is alive? Or have you brought his body for me to mourn?”

“From what we know, he is indeed alive.” Bjorn replied. “Ivar said that by time his party happened upon the scene, most of Lancille’s men were dead. However, a mortally wounded Archer told them that the Knight had been taken prisoner.”

“And that is good news, actually. It proves they mean to use him as a bargaining tool.” Alfred added in an attempt to ease your mind.

“Why did Ivar not report this to me himself?” You asked. “Is he not my Hand?”

With some hesitation, Bjorn confessed that the youngest Ragnarsson had not come with them. Instead, he chose to pass through the Trudig encampments to take care of some business.

With jaw tensed, your gaze fell upon the smoldering embers of the fireplace.

Indeed, War was an ugly affair. A reality the late Sir Alcanore, had emphasized on numerous occasions. In fact, your Uncle and Sir Everette both advised you to forget all you had read in books. Because there had never been victory without great loss.

And from the looks of things, your blood sacrifices were only just beginning.

“Prince Ivar!” Sir Everette declared angrily as your brother entered his dwelling. “With all due respect, I demand to know what you mean by all this rubbish! First, you unceremoniously remove me from my appointed station. Then, you have the gall to post your men about my tent. So since I am at a loss, please explain what I have done to deserve such treatment!”

“First, I suggest watching that tone, old man. Or my warriors will do far worse than simply posting themselves.”

Sir Everette could not keep from shaking his head in disappointment.

Though he had never fully trusted most of the Norsemen around you, he had come to respect many over time. But Ivar was never one of them. Because from the Knight Paladin’s could see, your brother was simply power hungry.

And that made him as dangerous as your Aunt, Jayne-Marie.

“If you truly want me to explain things……..” Ivar continued with a chuckle. “Ask nicely, and I might oblige.”

“Aye, you may be Princess Y/N’s relation, but I neither regard nor fear you. In fact, you are beneath my Queen in every way. So keep your stupid thoughts if you like. I shall not beg.”

Baffled by the response, Ivar’s eyes cut in Sir Everette’s direction. As he finally managed to sit upon the nearby table, he pondered throwing his axe at the trusted Knight.

However, he was able to squelch those thoughts, choosing instead to extend the game.

“You are going far away.” Ivar declared, an amused smirk crossing his face. “And since you obviously dislike me, that should make you a happy man.”

“I shall go nowhere, lest Princess Y/N sends word. In case you have forgotten, I do not take my orders from you, Heathen.”

“But of course you do. Or have YOU forgotten that I am the Queen’s Hand? That means, I am her voice in abstentia.”

Sir Everette could say nothing more. Thus, he stared into the void that were your brother’s eyes. And even in that moment, he knew that he likely would not be seen again. Because there was nothing good to be found in Ivar’s gaze.

“I see your tongue has finally stilled, Sir Everette. Anyway, it was a pleasure having you serve under Ragnar’s command. And I am sure that my sister appreciated the years of service. However, from this day, you are officially dismissed.”

Ivar then motioned for his men to take the Knight away. As they did so, the proud man did not beg or ask for reconsideration. However, he curses your brother as he was forcibly dragged into the blackness of the evening.

“Over my dead body! Do you hear me?” Ragnar snapped as his pleasant smile turned to a scowl. “You will do no such thing!”

“You are being irrational.” Ubbe countered, his own resentment now rising. All had been well only moments before. But with him broaching the subject of naming his newborn daughter, things had gone awry. “In case you are unaware, I need no permission to bestow the name. In fact, the only reason I even brought it to your attention was due to mother’s insistence.”

Sat at the head table, Prince Aethelwulf, Judith, Lagertha and a few others tried to focus on the exotic belly dancers. However, it was a somewhat difficult since there was an argument brewing nearby.

“If you and that pig you call a wife even attempt it, I will strangle you both!” Ragnar declared. “It will never happen!”

As you were listening to Sigurd and Hvitserk debate the merits of foreign weaponry, Pippa tapped your shoulder. She then motioned to where your father and brother were, obviously in disagreement.

“Perhaps you should attempt to soothe things, Princess. It would be terrible if things got out of hand and you were shamed in front of our hosts.”

You sighed, wishing Lancille was at your side.

Because typically, such whispers came from him. But despite your concerns for his safety, Bjorn had reassured you. In fact, your eldest brother had men scouting for information already. And even Alfred dispatched some of his own to assist with the endeavor.

Thus, you resigned yourself to see to your father and Ubbe.

As soon as you attempted to stand, Bolverk was at your side. The massive Heathen had been miraculously observant ever since becoming your temporary Personal Guard. So much, you had slowly convinced him to give you glimpse into his life. Because one thing was for certain, he was an enigma. Even to his fellow Norsemen.

“Sister, where are you going?” Hvitserk asked with a crooked smile. “Is our conversation that much of a bore?”

“Not at all. I shall return momentarily.”

You were then escorted through the Great Hall by the ever vigilant Bolverk. The only thing you had to ask, every so often, was that he was not rough in clearing a path. Because despite his cautious ways with your person, the Berserker was pushy with everyone else.

“Father, I do not know what you two are discussing.” You said as you reached Ragnar’s side. Setting a hand to his arm, you looked between him and Ubbe. “But whatever it is, let us leave it for another time. Because people are starting to take notice.”

“Your brother is an idiot! He can never leave good enough alone.”

“Me? I only asked for permission to name my daughter Gyda.” Ubbe seethed. He then decided to ignore Ragnar, giving you his undivided attention. “And you know how he reacts, Y/N? He berates me.”

“I’ll do far worse if you go through with it.”

Fed up with the insults, Ubbe proclaimed that Ragnar had never been a decent parental figure. He then added that he was the worst father anyone could possibly have. Because not only did he make everyone feel unwanted, he had chained himself to the past.

“But take heart, I will find another name for my daughter. One that belongs to her alone. That way, she will never contend with the shadows you choose to live with.”

Ragnar’s arm jerked as he contemplated striking Ubbe. But fortunately, your presence kept him from doing so.

“Father, Ubbe, please stop cutting one another down.” You implored, looking at each of them. “Can we not behave as a family, even once?”

“Do not waste your breath, sister. Ragnar does not care for anyone but himself. My mother learned this truth long ago. And honestly, I no longer care about winning his regard either.”

Ubbe then pressed a soft kiss to your cheek before walking away. Obviously, you were highly disheartened by the situation. Because despite all his progress, Ragnar was making you question his affections. Not for you, but for Aslaug and your brothers.

“Father, do you truly love me?”

“Do not start, Birdie. You ask something you already know the answer to.”

“Then promise that you will hold a family discussion.” You said as your father’s intense eyes fell upon you own. “That way, we can sort things when all minds are sober.”

Despite wanting to refuse the request, Ragnar could deny you nothing. A weakness he had come to dislike about himself. Nevertheless, he quickly nodded before asking that you sit with him a while.

You found yourself tossing and turning after retiring to your chambers.

Though truly exhausted, it was your many thoughts that did not permit slumber. But ultimately, you drifted off with a book in hand. And you remained in a blissful dream state until a thunderous knock came upon the door.

“Princess Y/N.” A guards voice called out. “Forgive me for rousing your sleep. But Prince Aethelred insists on having words.”

You lay motionless a while as you attempted to shake of the grogginess. Obviously, you were perplexed as to why the Prince had decided to wake you. Especially since he had opportunity to speak to you in the Great Hall. Nevertheless, you curiosity got the best of you; thus you informed the Guard that you would see Aethelred. Adding that he should await you in the nearby Sewing Room.

After getting out of bed, you searched for a modest heavy robe. After all, there was no need for any tongues to start wagging with all that was going on. Once you found the garment that covered you best, you departed your chamber.

When you opened the door to the Sewing Room, Aethelred was standing nearest a window. However, he turned upon hearing the squeaking of the redwood.

“Y/N, thank you for giving me audience.”

The Prince then walked over, stopping at an appropriate distance. Though he wished to embrace you, his thoughts went to propriety. Not for his own sake, but rather your own.

“Aethelred. I did not have the opportunity to speak to you this evening. But I am glad to see that you are well.”

“Gratitude. I am……………also glad that you are in good health.”

His gaze then went to your heavily rounded belly. For Aethelred, it was difficult to not feel a bevy of conflicting thoughts. Because on one hand, he wanted your child to be delivered healthy. But on the other, he had also wished that it would have been lost already.

“So you are quite close to your time.”

“That I am.” You replied as you set your palms to the swell. “The Maesters say it will be within the next weeks. But I am certain that you did not wake me to speak of babies.”

With some reluctance, Aethelred broached the subject of Wessex and Mercia. Not in terms of casual matters, but rather about succession and Ecbert’s failing health. The latter being something you were quite unaware of.

“What do you mean?” You asked, brow raised distrustfully. Though you still held feelings for the Prince, his actions had led to your Uncle’s death. For that reason, trust was difficult to muster these days. “There is nothing wrong with him. In fact, he wrote not long ago to ask of my condition. And nowhere did he mention feeling unwell.”

“Of course he didn’t, Y/N. Do you expect a proud man like that to announce such a thing?” Aethelred countered. He then paced some more before setting his hands to the table. “Ecbert is redrafting his Declaration of Will. And from what I have been told, there is a major change that many think irrational.”

You eyed him, wondering why he had brought the situation to your attention. Because despite being Alfred’s wife, you had no desire to interfere in their royal affairs. In fact, you figured the only time you would need to address Wessex and Mercia, was after the birth of your child.

Because your heirs would require titles from both you, and Alfred. Thus, you informed Aethelred that you did not understand why you should be concerned about his family’s succession.

“Still, I appreciate you telling me of Ecbert’s health.” You added. “For I have grown fond of him and will pray in earnest. But as for whom will rule your kingdom, it not my place. And to be quite honest, I do not care.”

“But it DOES concern you! Because you are married to very man that has usurped my bloodline. A bastard conceived upon some dirty floor, now positions himself to seize the throne. That is why I have brought it to your attention!”

You swallowed hard, realizing that all the rumors had been true. The Saxon King did favor your husband in every way. All this despite Alfred being the product of betrayal. And not betrayal of just anyone, but his very own son.

Indeed, it was allot to consider at such a late hour.

“Aethelred, what do you expect of me? In case you have forgotten, I have my own kingdom to-----”

“Advise him to recuse himself, when the time comes!” The Prince interrupted. “Because though I have tolerated much, I have my limits. My entire life has been lived under the weight of Alfred’s massive shadow. But not this time. If he thinks he will ascend the throne of my ancestors, he is sadly mistaken.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?” You asked as you stared Aethelred straight in the eye. Though you truly had no desire to be involved, you were carrying Alfred’s child. So if he were put in harm’s way, so would his heirs. “Are you laying out a threat to your brother through me?”

Without giving a direct response to your query, the Prince proclaimed that he would hold his position. And if that meant he and Alfred would eventually come to conflict, he would see things through.

“I will not bend to him, Y/N. Be sure to tell him that.”

“No! Tell him yourself, if you are so keen.” You fumed. All night, your thoughts had been taken by worries of Lancille. That, and the many other War related issues. Thus, you were utterly fed up with being pulled in every direction. “And the next time you wish to deliver a message, find a Royal Page or Attendant. I am a Monarch in my own right! Not some slave to you, Alfred or anyone else! Good evening!”

You were so incensed, that upon reaching your chambers, you threw a vase against the wall.

Poor King Garrat, the piece had been gifted to his Great Grandmother from an affluent Sheik. But you had shattered the delicate heirloom out of pure rage. After making your mind to tell your host of your actions in the morning, you returned to bed. And fortunately, sleep came quickly, despite your moodiness.

A short time later, you felt the bed sink and an arm go about your person.

“No need wake, Y/N.” Alfred whispered as he noticed you shifting under his embrace. “I found myself unable to sleep without you.”

As Sir Mansfeld sat lazily peeling an apple with his favored dagger, his father stormed under the canopy.

“There you are!” The elder Knight roared, his tone startling the nearby servant girls. “Had you not been my son, I would skin you alive and be done with it!”

With a bewildered expression, the young man asked why he was in such a mood. Especially since he had acquired a token that would restore favor to their Great House.

“Do you know what you have done?” Sir Grimley asked, his expression one of gravity. “Not only did you go behind my back, but you overstepped the Chain of Command. That is not how any Knight of valor behaves.”

“Father, please. Let us forego talk of valor and all the rest of that stupidity. Because from what I can see, none of it has restored our fortune and standing.”

With a shake of the head, his father declared him a fool. And not just any type of fool, but one that was doomed to hang by his own rope. After barking for a servant to give him wine, Sir Grimley reminded his son that he was neither a Paladin nor Commander.

In fact, he was serving underneath Sir Ronan; a man three years his junior.

“Go ahead. Remind me of my failings. But I will have you know that Lancille’s capture will fetch the accolades I deserve. You have no inclination of my numerous ambitions. Perhaps if you took the time to ask, I would tell you.”

“Rubbish!” Sir Grimley replied before spitting on the ground. “I have no need to drive myself mad with your fantasies. You always speak a multitude of words that lead nowhere!”

Though offended, Sir Mansfeld kept his composure. For one thing he wanted more than anything, was to impress his father. Thus, he walked to the nearby tree where Lancille was positioned. There, your poor Guard sat, bound at the hands and feet with a sack over his head.

As the young Knight gloated over his cousin, Sir Ronan and Boris appeared. Both men greeted Sir Grimley out of respect before going silent again.

“Are you not going to at least congratulate me on acquiring our prisoner?” Sir Mansfeld asked as pointed at Lancille. “I have killed two birds with one stone. First, resolving your longstanding grudge against your brother’s family. All while possessing a prisoner for our King.”

“You truly are stupid.” Sir Grimley declared as he poured the remnants of his wine onto the grass. “My late brother and I had disagreements that were our own. So you have done nothing by seizing your cousin. King Dorian will not show favor nor give you reward. He will simply murder him like he did Sir Alcanore. So the only thing you have done, is put us in peril. Because when that transpires, everyone will turn against our House.”

With that, the elder Knight tossed his chalice to the ground and stormed off to the War Room.

As for Sir Ronan, he bent down to examine Lancille. Though they had never crossed paths before the War, he had heard great things of your Personal Guard. Not only about him being an accomplished young warrior, but of his valor and loyalty.

Traits that Sir Ronan now realized was lacking in some under his command.

Whilst composing a letter to the family, Ecbert ran a hand over his face.

Though he knew his decision would cause untold conflict in the future, the wise King was resolute. In fact, he had never been more certain of a decision in his life. Indeed, Aethelred was his only legitimate grandchild, the blood of many great Saxons coursing through his veins. However, that did not mean the boy was meant to rule.

Especially during such perilous times when expansion was vital for survival.

“Do you suppose Alfred will accept?” Pope Leo IV asked as he looked up from the finalized Proclamation of Will. “Though he will be honored, we both know him to be exceptionally principled. Thus, I expect that he will be conflicted.”

“I have predicted that as well. For that reason, I shall appeal to his sense of duty and family. Something Aethelred knowns nothing about.” Ecbert replied thoughtfully. “And with Y/N soon to deliver, he will surely have his thoughts upon the future.”

“Praise God for that.” The Pope replied. “The Holy Catholic Church wants nothing more than to see our host nations rise. So what is good for Wessex and Mercia, is good Christians everywhere.”

“Aye, your Holiness. That is something we can both drink to.”

It took some doing, but you managed to get Ragnar and Ubbe to end their war of silence. And after pushing them further, you got them to agree upon a date for your niece’s Naming Ceremony. Thus, the rites were performed only a few days later. Making her officially known to the world as, Thyri Ubbedottir.

As you sat underneath a canopy nursing a cup of honeyed milk, Bjorn kept to your side. Naturally, the Heathen ceremony was somewhat peculiar in the eyes of your Christian hosts. However, King Garrat and Queen Giselle proved themselves quite tolerant.

Because not only did they permit the ceremony to be performed within their castle walls, they attended with their courtiers.

“I cannot wait for this baby to arrive.” You declared as you ran a hand over your belly. “He refuses to sit still and has been kicking me nonstop. And I have fed him properly all day.”

“If he’s anything like Hvitserk, you are in trouble.” Bjorn replied as he chewed some meat.

Though you felt physically well, your mind was not at rest. Because despite reassurances, Lancille was ever present in your thoughts. However, you had to force yourself to enjoy the family event. Because one thing was clear. Time was not promised to anyone.

Thus, you did your best to live in the moment.

“Cousin, you look like an ant that has swallowed a grape.” Armin declared. After sitting beside you, he palmed your belly. “Are you certain there is not more than one baby in there?”

“Oh, this is delightful. I missed you all this while, only to have you return speaking like my mother-in-law.”

With a chuckle, Bjorn informed you that your cousin had a point. For you did appear somewhat larger than what he was accustomed to. In fact, he too felt that you were likely carrying more than one.

“I’m glad you are both eager to see me mothering more than one child. At least I know who their caregivers will be.”

Bjorn eyed you with amusement as Armin laughed.

Neither man eager to look after a baby for extended periods of time. Not long after, Alfred approached, finally tearing himself away from Ragnar and his father. With a pleasant smile, the Prince greeted you before snapping in Rimidle’s direction.

“Mother said you should partake of these.” He added as the young woman handed you a platter of fruits selected by Judith herself. “She said they’re known to ease nausea.”

“Alfie, sit.” You commanded, tired of him avoiding you.

For whatever reason, the Prince was obviously nervous about your condition. Thus, he had resigned himself to numerous duties and anything else to keep him distracted. But not at this event. You were determined to make Alfred keep you company. Even if it was by force.

“I will see you later, sister.” Bjorn said as he and Armin rose to their feet.

Your brother and cousin then departed, leaving you with your husband.

“Alfie, why do you avoid touching my belly?” You asked before leaning against his shoulder. As you did so, Rimilde could not keep from rolling her eyes. Something quite unbecoming of a servant. “You only did so on your first night back.”

“I suppose you are owed an explanation.” The Prince replied, his cheeks turning a rosy hue. “For you see, I am only keeping to the promise I made.”

Alfred spoke the truthfully. Because prior to your vows, you made it abundantly clear that was no romantic love between you. Yet, the passage of time had changed several things in your life. And that included your feelings towards him.

“I know I’m not the easiest person to live with. However, you are the father of my child.” You replied as you snuggled against him. “I need to know you feel something about my condition. Even if it is the smallest gesture.”

Alfred’s eyes fell upon your own, the blue of them taking in your every feature. Even without saying a word, you could see how much the Prince adored you. Something that brought great comfort. Because truth be told, you found yourself becoming paranoid with each passing day.

After putting an arm around you, Alfred kept staring as a gentle breeze washed over the two of you. Indeed, it was as if everyone gathered in the Courtyard were miles away. Because you felt secure in the arms of your husband. Knowing he would never abandon nor betray you.

“Your Highness, will you not have your meal now?” Rimilde interrupted.

Irritated by the unnecessary query, Alfred’s brow furrowed.

“As I have said before, when I am prepared to eat, I shall give the command. Now depart with the others until you are called for.”

With a curtsy, the pretty servant girl apologized She then departed, making her way towards the kitchen. But as she did so, Princess Luciya watched her a while. Your sister-in-law then looked at Aslaug and Judith, announcing that she disliked Rimilde.

“That girl does not know her place.” Luciya said. “Not only did I catch her sneaking about Prince Alfred’s passageway, she eyes Princess Y/N inappropriately. Were it my place to dismiss Saxon Attendants, she would be gone already.”

Naturally, the words struck Judith more than Aslaug. Because despite her initial wish for Alfred to take a Mistress, such behavior could not be tolerated. Even if the Prince had taken Rimilde for a lover, she would still have to show you respect.

For that reason, your mother-in-law began to ponder a solution.

“I am glad you brought her conduct to my attention, Luciya.” Judith said. I shall rectify things straightaway.”

Sat upon his elaborate golden throne, Dorian smiled as Queen Valentina took her place.

Within her arms was their son, Arwyn-Maximiliano Marfont II. The nine-month-old had been Christened for the second time earlier that day. Because the War had caused him to miss the first ceremony. Being who he was, your cousin requested that an Archbishop perform the honors again.

So after gifting a great amount of coin to the Holy Roman Church, his wish was granted.

“You are in a good mood today.” Valentina noted as she cradled Arwyn. “Why is that?”

“My darling wife. You speak as if I am usually some type of ghoul.”

Despite laughing at his assertion, the young woman was concerned. Because Dorian only behaved gleefully when some plot was afoot. For that reason, she suspected that his mood had something to do with you.

And she was indeed correct. Because not even a second later, a Royal Page announced the arrival of the King’s personal Guard. As the massive warrior entered with his retinue, he pushed a little boy forward.

Since he appeared to be no more than eight years of age, it was unsurprising when the child hesitated.

“Greet your King, boy.” Renfry the Black commanded. “Or would you like me to box your ears?”

Irritated by the threat, Queen Valentina looked at Dorian. Naturally, your cousin aimed to please his wife. For that reason, he raised a hand.

“There is no need to abuse the child.” He declared as he rose from his throne. With a smile, he then looked at the boy. “Tell me, little one. Do you know who I am?”

With a nod, the boy courteously declared that he was the King of Arundel. A response that garnered giggles and chuckles from all those in the Great Hall. Pleased that the child had at least been reared well, Dorian asked if he knew why he was there.

“I do not know, your Majesty.”

“Well, what if I told you that your mother and I are good friends. And that she has been wanting to reunite with you for good?”

The boy’s eyes doubled in size. For despite being raised by warm-hearted Caregivers, he knew of his mother. The one that lived in foreign lands and worked to provide him a better life.

“Will I see her today, my King?”

“Not today, Zoran. However, you shall reside within these castle walls until that day comes.” Dorian replied, putting a hand to the boy’s shoulder. “And that day will be soon. Of that, I can assure you.”

You paced the floor of King Garrat’s private Library, awaiting Ivar’s arrival.

Though he had passed through the Trudig encampments for longer than expected, your brother had finally arrived at the castle. Thus, you asked to have word as soon as he was done having his bath and food. But despite your attempts to remain calm, you felt on the verge of a tirade.

“Sister, please think of the baby.” Hvitserk advised from where he was sat by the fireplace. “Compose yourself, because we will resolve everything.”

You nodded despite still feeling as if you would explode. Because only moments prior, an Aruyan Messenger delivered news that Sir Everette had disappeared. Thus, two of the people that you cared for most, were now unaccounted for.

And if that was not bad enough, the Messenger also stated that Ivar had relieved the Knight of his duties. Something that was done without your permission or directive.

“Y/N.” Ivar proclaimed with a great smile upon his face. As he moved upon his crutch, it took all your resolve not to slap him. “I have missed you.”

“Oh?” You snapped, unable to feign any civility. “Have you?”

With raised brow, Ivar looked to Hvitserk before giving you his attention again. He then asked if you had not received enough rest. Because according to him, you were behaving like an unhinged person.

“I am indeed deranged!” You replied matter-of-factly. “And perhaps, it is how I should be at all times. Because apparently, that is the only way to get anyone’s attention.”

“If you have something to say, just say it. Because I don’t know what you’re rambling about.”

“Ivar, she was told that you dismissed Sir Everette from his duties. No matter your title, it’s not your place to restructure her Armies. That’s Ragnar’s decision to make.”

“Hvitty, shut your mouth! This is between Y/N and I. Why are you even here?”

You promptly informed him that you asked Hvitserk to be present. Because truth be told, you needed someone to keep you from going berserk. Angered that you wished to speak to him with someone else nearby, Ivar repositioned his crutch.

“We shall speak when you are in control of your emotions, Y/N.” He declared with a shrug. “Nothing good will come of us arguing.”

You wanted to pull your hair out. Why Ivar had to behave as he did, you did not know. However, you had to get out of his presence, or risk saying something improper. So instead of pressing the matter, departed the Library in haste.

“You really confuse me.” Hvitserk said as he confronted the raven-haired Ragnarsson. “You are bestowed trust, only to use it as an opportunity to assert dominance. These armies, ships and allies are Y/N’s. Not yours!”

“Are you done running your mouth now?”

With a stern expression, Hvitserk agreed to leave the matter for the time being. However, he promised that he would get involved in helping you find your men. Adding that you deserved more respect than was being shown.

“One last thing, Ivar. If anything happens to Sir Everette, it will surely cause our sister pain. And if that occurs, I will see you pay for it.”

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crazy-loca-blog · 4 years

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Personal thoughts on… 2020 releases (Part II)

Note: As the title says, these are just personal opinions on Choices books and chapters. Of course, you may agree or disagree with them, I only use this platform to express my thoughts on what I read every week.

Welcome to the second post! Sorry for the delay, but it took me a little while to finish it for two main reasons: I wanted to have one extra chapter of Foreign Affairs before giving an opinion on the book and I realized I had a lot of catching up to do with My Two First Loves... but here I am!

Remember that this is a three-part post (you may find the first one here) and that I will include current releases and books that were released during 2019 but were finished in 2020. The list is organized in alphabetical order, and it doesn’t include the VIP Books (as I’ll talk about them in a fourth post). The only books I will be skipping will be Desire & Decorum: First Winter and Bloodbound: Dark Solstice, as they’re seasonal books that I fully covered in the 2019 review.

Foreign Affairs (December 30, 2020 - present): It’s hard to talk about a book after only three chapters, but I have to admit I really, really like what I’ve seen so far. My favorite thing is how the writers approach the characters. All these people have some serious reputation to keep and they all are trying to balance it with the fact that they’re young adults who want to have fun and are discovering themselves as individuals. Growing up in the spotlight is hard, and I guess it must be harder when it’s not your choice, as you’re not allowed to make mistakes and your life path seems to be already decided without even asking what do you want for you. I don’t know if you noticed it, but none of the students seems to be attending Vancross because they want, they all attend the institute because they must. In the end, it looks like we’ll have a great story about people with very different backgrounds who have much more in common than they believe. High School Story: Class Act, Book 3 (October 30, 2019 - March 11, 2020): I know that the original High School Story series was way too popular, and that made things hard for HSSCA since the very beginning. However, and even though this is probably the weakest book in the series, I feel like there were certain things we didn’t appreciate enough when it was originally released. The third book not only addressed Skye’s issues with her abusive family, but it also took our twins back to their roots. It was nice to discover that they are actually British and that they still have an aunt who is alive (and who was glad to meet them). However, I think the writers wasted a great opportunity to give an amazing closure to this series, especially because we knew this was the very last adventure of our Berry High students. The characters did have to face some serious stuff in all three books (more than the OG cast) and I felt that PB could have used that to make our kids grow up faster than expected or to translate the experiences in their personal lives to their final performance at the festival in London. Instead, they gave us a fight with another drama club and a mix of characters of both HSS and HSSCA that personally didn’t convince me that much.

Hot Couture (VIP release: December 19, 2019 / General release: December 16, 2020): When it comes to the first three fully released VIP books, there is no doubt for me that Hot Couture is the weakest one. However, this doesn’t mean it’s a bad book, not at all! It is well-written, it has interesting LI’s and it’s definitely what I like to call a “romance with substance” book: that is, there is a love story, but the main focus of the plot is not on the romance. We have a MC who works hard for what she wants, who is aware of what she can do and who doesn’t need a LI to blossom. The romance is only one added element to the main story. I still think they should have gone deeper into the issues that models must face (eating disorders, rivalries, the stress of feeling that you’re “disposable” for the industry, salary breaches, etc.) but overall, I ended up being super invested in the book, to the point it was the first full release in a long time that only took me a few days to complete. It’s not what I would consider a masterpiece, but it is a great, fun and enjoyable standalone book. My Two First Loves (July 27, 2020 - present): I think there is a lot to be said about this book… and I don’t even know where to begin with. MTFL is not only the very first daily release in the app (and I think it will be the only one), it also introduced us to a different concept when it comes to romance books: exploring. Yeah, because when it seems like most players tend to choose one LI and stick to them, My Two First Loves leaves us no choice but to romance or to have very close relationships with all three LIs in the book as part of its plot, something that made a lot of players uncomfortable and/or upset. My main problem with the book is its extension: there are so many little chapters that there are two or three days when it seems like nothing happens. This became a problem to the point that it’s been hard to appreciate how the story has actually evolved or how much the characters have grown (I’m seriously loving Mason and Ava’s growth, and I think Noah got stuck at some point in the middle of the story and he hasn’t been as interesting as he was in the first half of the book). As a reader, I think my biggest mistake was trying to read the story every day after the chapter release. This actually led to a “lack of fluency” to me. Now I wait a few days and read four or five chapters at once, and trust me, the story is way more enjoyable this way. Open Heart, Second Year (February 29, 2020 – November 7, 2020): Sorry guys… I try not to, but I can’t help being completely biased when it comes to Open Heart, as this is my absolute favorite series in the app. And even though a lot of people think OH2 is a mess, I have to disagree with you. From my point of view, one of the things that makes Open Heart a different series is that it is meant to be a slow story, where every chapter is a little piece of something bigger that ends up being solved at the very end of the book (it’s like having a big puzzle where we have very different pieces that don’t seem to have much sense individually, but in the end they all fit in and create some beautiful image), so it plays a lot with our patience as players because nothing is instant. This is also another book that I consider as a “romance with substance”, as the main focus of the story is on the medical cases, not on the romance. Would I change things about this book? Of course I would! More time with our friends, similar time with our LIs, Zaid and Ines finally assuming that they’re a couple… but overall, the book delivered, especially because it takes talent to give closure to the insane amount of subplots this book had. Kudos to the writers for it! Queen B (June 26, 2020 - October 2, 2020): I have mixed emotions about one of the most popular releases of 2020. It doesn’t matter if you like Queen B or not, I think there are a few things no one can’t deny: the plot is consistent, the book is easy to read, there is always something going on, and it keeps you wanting more during most chapters. All of these things make the book a very, very attractive and likeable release. However, at some point, the level of bullying in the story was too much for me to handle. I couldn’t care less about the popularity contest after a few chapters, basically because it made my MC change and become a person I could barely recognize, and because what Poppy did to Zoey (who is the real Queen B in my opinion!) and Ian/Ina (threatening to destroy their career “because she can”) is plain EVIL! Also, the fact that Ian/Ina became so possessive of the MC at the end of the book was kind of scary, to the point that I’m seriously considering replaying Book 1 before Book 2 is released just to remain single.

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gwens-projects · 4 years

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Day 19 - Theme Memories

So I’ve been around this fandom for a long time, not as long as some people, but since TPOM was still kicking out episodes. Today I’m going to talk about some of the memories I’ve made through this fandom.

Under a read more because this is going to be long.

I remember first when I was really small getting to watch Madagascar when it first came out. It was very blurry and pixilated because it was on one of those cam copy discs that my dad had brought home. It was fun, I liked it, but didn’t think anything about it really. The same happened with Madagascar 2 a few years later, and then after that I got my first exposure to TPOM when dad had a disc with the When I was a Penguin Zombie ep collection on it. I’m pretty sure I watched that disc on repeat for weeks in the car, I loved it but had no idea there were like actually other eps I could watch anywhere else.

Years after that, somehow I managed to catch the Return of the Revenge of Dr. Blowhole on TV actually in the midst of all the singing, we almost turned the channel but I was amazed that there were more eps than what I had seen before and we watched what was left of the episode.

I’ve never been someone who easily makes friends. I’m very quiet, nervous, and rather weird. 8th grade I made my first decent friends, and then at the end of the school year both transferred away to different schools. I was about...15 maybe? and I was crushed. I had never really noticed how lonely I really was until then, and so I started watching some shows on youtube I remembered I liked but never got to watch every ep of...Kim Possible, Lilo and Stitch, the Smurfs....I was looking for something Smurf related online when I accidentally discovered fanfiction, specifically Smurfs fanfiction that I thought was actually like a canon Smurfs book. This led me to exploring fanfiction a little more and then I accidentally come across some TPOM oneshot (written in Spanish that my computer translated) about Private? It reminded me that oh yeah the penguins was a show I liked as a kid, so I looked it up and started binging those eps.

Watching those eps, I honestly felt the least alone I had felt all summer. Private was my first comfort character and at the time I found him super relatable. I also started reading a few TPOM fanfics. Season 3 still had episodes coming out and so that was pretty exciting. That August I started writing my first fanfic, A Trixy Situation, and drew my first fanarts. I also consequently made my first OC.

I look back at that first fanfic and the reviews I got and all I can think is “People thought this was good?” But at the same time, if it wasn’t for those kind comments back then, I wouldn’t be the writer I am now. A Trixy Situation wasn’t just my first fanfic, it was the first piece of written fiction I ever wrote and FINISHED. People’s kind comments spurred me to write and for the first time I really felt like I was writing for a purpose AND having fun with it. I was over the moon.

Granted, I did get my first critiquing review a few fics later, and as much as I cried over it...I will admit, it made me a much better writer. I still wish they had phrased it differently though.

Through fanfiction as well I made my first fandom friends. One of which I still keep in contact with even now 7 years later. She became my first best friend that I could truly say was my best friend and I wouldn’t have made her except through this fandom.

When I transferred schools from private to public in 10th grade, TPOM eps and writing TPOM fanfiction got me through it. It was...a rough 3 years of my life. I had 0 offline friends, but I had that one very good online friend who I would sneak chats to through a google doc during lunch and class breaks.

I remember when AHKJ came out and I’d have to stay off of tumblr because tumblr mobile wouldn’t let me tag and block spoilers and GEE WERE THERE SO MANY SPOILERS POSTED.

January 2016 I gave roleplaying a try and made a slew of Private_Private_Penguin rp accounts across multiple platforms. I made a few connections and associates then, but none really stuck. However, I had a lot of fun rping as Private until the rp community more or less went silent.

Junior and senior year of high school and the first couple years of college, I was too busy and stressed to think of TPOM much. Then I noticed a new up-springing in TPOM rpers again. I watched a few eps and this time around realized that I really, really related to Kowalski now....Far more than I ever related to Private in the past. Granted, in the past I was kind of driven away from Kowalski because the fandom was so...well, let’s just say there were a lot of rapid Kowalski fangirls where it made me nervous to even approach the character. Private didn’t have as many fans so he was calmer to have as a favorite. But modernly, the Kowalski hype had died down and I finally felt at ease finding him as a comfort....I also think the age old “disliking a character until you realize there’s a lot of yourself in that character and that’s why you dislike them” theory applied to that as well...because he and I do have a lot in common, personality wise.

Anyway, through the new round of rping as Kowalski, I made some new fandom friends and through them was exposed to new fandoms and experienced a new love for the series as a whole. I also was introduced to new ship ideas and got new headcanons....And then I got back into writing fanfiction. My friend who rps as Blowhole, they got me into the Franski ship...Our rping was a slow burn enemies to friends to Kowalski muse having a crush on Blowhole. It’s a fun thing to look back at the old rps like “oh Kowalski started liking this ship before I did.”

After I got back into fanfic writing, I made yet another friend who IMed me about my writing and since then I’ve been co-writing with her on her fic. I also discovered a discord group where I ran into several fanguins who I recognized were around the fandom back when eps were coming out as well and I just sort of felt...at home? It’s the best way I can describe it. It was new but familiar all at the same time. Did we all share the same ships and headcanons? Heck no, but with such a vague canon that’s understandable and completely fine. It’s interesting seeing the different ideas and such and the joint enthusiasm we all have for this franchise.

I’ve recently started watching A Little Wild...Admittedly, I’m struggling with it but for its target audience, it would be a great intro into the franchise, honestly.

I have so many memories from this franchise and its fandom, some bad, but mostly good. And now I just will take this moment to thank both the franchise and the fandom for the memories and comfort its given me through the years.

#2020madagascarparty #tpom #the penguins of madagascar #penguins of madagascar #gwen speaks #long post #2020 Madagascar party

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more-quiverfull-sims · 4 years

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AN: Patience Grace may be knee-deep in the Kool-Aid, but she’s a Kendra to Ingrid’s Michelle--giggly, sweet, and sometimes a little slow on the uptake. Not only is she not upset that her brother Camden eloped to marry a Calvinist, she does not catch on that Evy and her husband used birth control to delay the birth of a son until Evy was 23 (and had actually hoped to wait even longer than that! But these two are only having one more kid regardless). Things are calm right now because Patience and Jon only share three children, but chaos is on the horizon, as are a number of Gorman courtships. Which of Patience’s siblings will end up single forever?

Also, I find it really interesting that both Ingrid and Patience seem to have more boys than girls. Patience is pregnant with #4, and it’s another boy. A similar pattern happened with Ingrid. It’s interesting to see!

The Fleming Family so far:

Jon Edward (26)

Patience Grace (22)

Colton Jon (4, born shortly before Patience turned 19)

Claire Ingrid (2)

Christian Thomas (1)

Whew! Adjusting to life as a family of five has been a challenge--but so worth it! Shifting from “man to man” parenting to being outnumbered certainly is crazy, but we’ve been loving this journey so far. Here’s a picture we took at church recently. Unfortunately it was a little cloudy outside, but I was still glad we got a nice photo in our Sunday best. Look how sweet Colton is! What an amazing big brotehr!

We are so fortunate that our little ones get along so well!

The next Saturday, I went to visit my sister, Evangeline. Evy turned 24 a couple of weeks ago, and I wanted to celebrate with her and just catch up! This season has been so busy for both of us, and it was nice to hear how she’s doing.

Her son, Cameron (named after her twin, Camden), is turning one soon and is close in age to our son, Christian. Evy and Auggie were married for almost five years before they had Cameron, so his birth is a real miracle! I said to Evy that she must have been praying for a child for years by the time she had him, and she laughed. She must have felt so overwhelmed by joy!

Evy is finishing up her bachelor’s degree in piano performance and planning to obtain a master’s degree as well. Meanwhile Auggie is working as a concert pianist in the San Myshuno orchestra!

My absolute favorite thing these days is just spending some quiet downtime with my littles. I love doing homeschooling and Bible study with them.

It’s also been a busy time for love in the Gorman family! Rylee Michelle is courting, and both John Brice and Camden Duggarson were married recently.

Rylee is dating Ricardo Lopez of Willow Creek. He’s from a lovely family that shares our values, and comes from hardy stock--both his father and grandfather worked as commercial fishermen!

John Brice married Lily Smyth recently. Lily is from a family that shares our beliefs, but has slightly different standards about makeup--the women in their family have felt convicted not to wear any! My Mama had to do some praying before coming around to the match, but she received great counsel from my brother, Ezekiel, and Jon, and now she loves Lily like her own!

Camden surprised us a little by deciding to elope with his bride, Deja Castro. Only Evy and her family attended! However, I understood why he chose to elope--Deja is a slightly different denomination from us. I’ll always love my brother and wish him the best!

Last but not least...I am expecting again! That’s right, our fourth baby (and third little boy!) is on the way. Stay tuned for a huge gender reveal party I threw with several of my sisters and sisters-in-law who are also expecting! What a blessing!

#theflemings #thegormans #quiverfull sims #fundie sims #sims 4

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rhetorical-ink · 4 years

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Rhetorical Ink Reviews: Seven Deadly Sins - Season One

**SINFUL SPOILERS BELOW**

My brother and I have been doing “Sibling Streaming” since the start of the Covid-19 quarantine -- catching up with Haikyuu!!, which we both wanted to watch, and then we watched my pick: Demon Slayer, which I’ve reviewed. My brother’s pick was Seven Deadly Sins, and so with us having finished Season One, I wanted to give you all --

My Top Ten Thoughts on Seven Deadly Sins - Season One:

10. Probably my favorite aspect about the show is the character dynamics between each other -- the “Seven Deadly Sins” (or 6 at this point...we haven’t met the “Pride” sin, yet) all interact in unique and fun ways with one another. Obviously, my favorite dynamics so far are Meliodas and Ban’s interactions along with Diane and King’s -- since we’ve been with those four the longest so far.

9. The show isn’t afraid to get gory...but is there a consequence? I appreciate that the show does not shy away from blood and gore from the get-go. The only aspect that is a little frustrating is, as my brother notes, “anime logic” on bleeding out. Seriously, these guys have like 200 liters of blood in them. It does make the stakes seem a little lower at times, when you know the characters can get healed rather quickly or survive certain blows.

8. I will say that I like the side characters we have introduced! Gila and Jericho are fun, Howser is basically “The Yamcha of Seven Deadly Sins” and my brother and I are here for it, Arther Pendragon is so lovable (probably doesn’t help he has the same English dub VA as Tanjiro for Demon Slayer), and then we have Margaret and sweet, “little Gil.”

Not going to lie, I hated Gilthunder at the start of this show. He was an annoyingly smug antagonist and for most of the season, he just ticked me off with how he wasn’t being open-minded as Howser and Gila had become learning the “truth” about the situation the Seven Deadly Sins (SDS) were placed into. However, once Margaret gets involved, and we have the reveal that they’ve been “cursed” this entire time, and the curse is lifted, then Gil becomes a good character, and I’m here for that!

7. About that -- probably my biggest critique/pet peeve about the show is that it tends to “show” you things happening, but doesn’t follow up with the “tell” until much later. I do appreciate that there’s more “show” than “tell” to begin with, but when you don’t understand what’s happening, it can be confusing.

With the Gilthunder and Margaret curse-lifted moment, I was so confused watching. My brother, who has read the manga, was like, “Don’t you get it? It’s ____” but because I hadn’t read the manga, I had to wait until the next episode started to get the backstory and explanation. Waiting on exposition in a fantasy world that has some crazy world-building elements can be frustrating, especially if you’ve watched shows that handle it slightly more effectively (a la Demon Slayer).

6. I do like Meliodas’s character a lot -- he’s a fun, yet powerful character, and reminds me a lot of Bleach’s Ichigo and his hollow when his demon side lets loose. However, there is one aspect I’m not a fan of, and that’s his constant groping of Elizabeth. I get it...it’s a common trope in manga/anime, but I still am not a fan of it and it does make me uncomfortable, especially in a scene when he does it in front of Elizabeth’s father. So...there’s that.

5. Speaking of Elizabeth, I will admit that at first, I was weary of her character, seeing her as a “damsel in distress” -- but, a few episodes in, she starts to establish herself as more than that, and by the end of season one, she’s basically a healer and someone capable of saving themselves and those around them. I also really like the angel vs demon dynamic that her and Meliodas have together, and I’m looking forward to that expanded in later seasons!

4. So, in terms of favorite characters, I would have to say that while I love all of the SDS’s equally, my favorites are Ban and Gowther at this point. Ban is just such a fun “badboy” trope that I really appreciate getting more depth in this season. His love for Elaine is just adorable and I really hope we get more on those two in future seasons. It’s also fun that he’s basically immortal, so there are a lot of gags they can get away with that are hilarious and effective.

While I said I wasn’t a fan of the groping, I would be remiss to not mention that there is some “man service” given with Ban’s character typically at the center of it, so I can understand if someone thinks there’s a double-standard there. Although...no one is groping Ban. I do appreciate the joke that his outfit keeps getting ripped and there just happen to be people running around with red leather suits on.

On the opposite end of the “man service” spectrum is Gowther, who is just a badass psychic who can create mental illusions and has some powerful magic surrounding him. He’s basically a robot personality-wise, so I hope we get more developed with his character two...especially as...is he in a relationship with Gila? Not going to lie...I’m kind of all for these two emotionless powerhouses teaming up.

3. In terms of antagonists, of course Hendrickson is the main baddie of this season -- I’m not entirely convinced he’s gone, since he’s been set up as such a threat and his goal of combining their world with the demon realm seems to still be the central conflict of the show. However, while he does turn into the “frieza-style-transformed-monster” by the climax of the season, I did appreciate the uniqueness of the “New Generation” and how he was using demon blood to corrupt and control the Holy Knights -- it was a neat plot point and I liked how that same demon he was using connected back to Ban, King, and other characters. I’m wondering where that story arc goes from here...

2. While I did nag on the show being confusing at times with showing us information and not telling us other information, I DO appreciate the world-building in terms of all the fantasy elements. There’s fairies, immortals, angels, demons, giants, and other creatures just out and about and it helps to establish a variety of types and varieties of creatures to interact and have unique abilities...now if only I could keep them all straight.

1. Overall, I am happy to start watching Seven Deadly Sins, if for the characters and to see where the story goes from here. Is it my favorite anime I’ve picked up this year? No, but now that we’ve at least established the world, the characters, and I have an idea where the plot can go, I’m curious to see how it’s expanded upon and hopefully to get backstory on some of the SDS we haven’t been able to focus on -- and to see the last one! Also, Ban’s left the group to go on his own personal side quest, so I’m excited to see that unfold as well.

#Seven Deadly Sins #Seven Deadly Sins Season One #Seven Deadly Sins Review #NNT anime #NNT #Meliodas #Seven Deadly Sins Elizabeth #Seven Deadly Sins Diane #Seven Deadly Sins King #Ban the Undead #Gowther #Merlin Seven Deadly Sins #Gilthunder #Margaret seven deadly sins #Hendrickson #Seven Deadly Sins Gila #Rhetorical Ink Reviews #Sibling Streaming

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tricksters-captain · 5 years

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FP Jones/Andrew’s Family/Riverdale imagines - Oh Dear Part 31

A/N: It’s been a while but as we come to the final chapters of this series I’d just like to say thank you to all those who have supported me throughout this series.

MASTERLIST LINK (HERE)

Overall Summary: You’re Archie’s older sister and you have a thing for a certain Serpent.

This chapter: Based on season 2 episode 19 - With the Black Hoods return, there’s a buzz in the air, a buzz of fear, a tension that looms between everyone.

Pairing: Reader x FP Jones, Sister!Reader x Archie Andrews, Daughter!Reader x Fred Andrews

Word count: 3,448

Warnings: underage drinking, strong language

Recap of the series:

You are Archie’s older sister and with the pressure of college looming and the trouble of having to be the perfect daughter for Fred after your Mom left, you fall into the world of FP Jones. Crushing on him since forever you never dreamt that the older man would also harbour feelings now that you are older. Leaving behind your perfect world of straight A’s and cheerleading you have focused on trying to help FP overcome his alcoholism and bring his son back to him. This leads to a romance blossoming and you joining the Serpents to be closer to the older man and the Southside. But a relationship like yours doesn’t come without complications and hardships especially in a town like Riverdale with murder, prison time, gang rivalry, civil war, statues losing their heads and Penny Peabody. Things seem to get worse everyday and that’s when the black hood appears; targeting ‘sinners’ and what’s worse than a young girl being ‘corrupted’ by an older man, sex, bikes and becoming a gang member.

Being the older sister also meant having to watch out for Archie. With Hiram Lodge returning to town, Archie is dragged into the family business as he dates Hiram’s favourite daughter. Getting involved with Archie’s affairs meant Hiram also trying to use you against your will. Blackmail and threats from the man manipulate you to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants. After occupying indecent photos of you and FP together and with the information that you’re a Serpent, Hiram felt no guilt using that against you to go against your own family,

However, when your father runs for mayor against the Lodge’s, Hiram uses one of his many minions to out the fact you’re a Serpent to your dad live on television. The light of this knowledge and the discovery of your Serpent jacket leads to high tensions not only between you and Fred but Fred and FP as well.

You decide to leave your childhood home and move in with FP and Jughead but something has seemed off over the past week or so and when the school musical rolls around, you understand why.

FP still has feelings for Alice Cooper and his conflicted emotions between the two of you leads to heartbreak as you observe him watch Alice and Hal together at the musical’s opening night.

Nevertheless, there are bigger problems to face as the supposedly dead Blackhood has returned, leaving a dead body and a bloody message on the set of ‘Carrie the Musical’ leaving you scared for not only yourself but FP and your father who the Blackhood failed to kill the first time round...

Now: S2 E19

Everything seemed to pass in a blur after the opening night of the musical. Midge’s funeral rolled around quickly and it didn’t shock you to the amount of people who attended. She was a popular girl and the way she died was horrific.

You stood beside Jughead and FP as the funeral commenced. You were trying to avoid eye contact with your father, it was the first time you had seen Fred since you moved out, since the night of the musical.

You laid down the rose you held in your hand on top of her casket as Cheryl stood with her Vixen and sang for Midge.

You desperately wanted to reach out and hold FP’s hand but you knew you couldn’t with so many people around but with the murder fresh in everyone’s minds you almost forgot that you were upset with FP.

As the funeral came to an end, you rushed after your brother and his friends. You wrapped your arm around his waist and ducked under his arm as you walked. You were worried about Archie, he used to be so obsessed with the Black Hood that you feared the obsession would now return. You just hoped it didn't end with him being buried alive again.

“Have you spoken to Dad?” Arch asked you quietly.

“No.” You admitted, looking down at your feet for a second to avoid Archie’s disappointed reaction.

You felt Archie stand still and you rose your head to see the Sheriff approach Mrs. Klump.

You could almost hear the remark inside Veronica’s head that this wasn’t going to be pretty.

“Mrs. Klump?” Sheriff Keller sped up to catch Midge’s mother who walked arm-in-arm with Cheryl Blossom. “I just wanted you to know that the Sheriff Department is working around––”

Keller was shortly cut off by Mrs. Klump’s palm connecting with his cheek. You had to refrain from gasping at the assault.

“You were supposed to be protecting our children.” Mrs. Klump hissed, “you should be ashamed of yourself.”

You watched Mrs Klump walk off but Cheryl stay behind, you couldn’t quite hear what she was saying but you didn’t doubt it was anything less than a threat or a rich insult.

“I better get going.” You pulled away from Archie as Kevin ran up to his father to see if he was okay.

“Please speak to Dad. He’s worried about you.” Archie frowned as you started backing away.

“I’m sorry, Arch.” You sighed as you dug your hands in your pocket. You drove FP here since you thought it was too dangerous to ride his bikes in weather this bad so you knew he’d be waiting for you. Jughead refused the ride since he wanted to go to Pop’s with Betty and your brother after the funeral.

“(Y/N)!” You heard your fathers voice behind you as you were making your way towards your car.

You slowed as you heard him running to catch you up.

“Dad.” You turned to face him but it took everything in your power not to run away.

“Look, (Y/n), I want you back in the house.” He started,

“Dad, can’t we talk about this another time?” You tried pushing your way out of this conversation but Fred refused to give up.

“No, I want to talk about it now.” You noticed Fred’s eyes flicker past your head to wear FP was stood. “I don’t like you living on the Southside with everything that’s going on at the moment.”

You didn’t respond. You just waited to hear what else he wanted to say.

“With what happened with Midge, I just want to know you’re safe. I can’t have both you and Archie out the house all the time, at least with Archie I see him get home in the evenings––”

“I am safe.” You interrupted him. “I’m with Jughead and FP at Sunnyside. I have the Serpents and we protect our own. There’s safety in numbers.”

“Safety in numbers?” Fred scoffed, “Look how many people were at Pop’s the morning I was shot. Look how many people were at the high school when Midge was murdered and nailed to a wall.”

“I’m not coming home.” You stood your ground as Fred grew more irritated with you. “You can’t accept who I am. I can’t live in a house where I’m looked at with disgust.”

“I can’t accept who you are? (Y/n), the Serpents are everything they’re made out to be. You’re falling into a life of crime and danger. You have everything at your finger tips, a good college, a secure future and you’re throwing it away for a leather jacket and some so-called-friends?” Fred seemed to have snapped.

You shook your head and stuck your tongue into your cheek.

“I’ll see you later, Dad.” You retorted, shaking your head as your turned on your heels.

“Everything alright?” FP asked as you pulled out your car keys.

“Just peachy.” You grumbled, unlocking your car for the man to climb in.

You didn’t speak to FP the whole ride back to Sunnyside. You just listened to music and the sound of your windscreen wipers when the snow landed on your car. He knew you needed space.

You switched off your car engine as you pulled into the driveway but you didn’t exit the car just yet.

“You coming in?” FP asked, his brow furrowed as you didn’t move.

“I think I might go for a drive. Clear my head.” You told him, not looking towards him as you spoke.

“Alright.” FP pressed his lips into a thin line. “Don’t be too late.” He placed his hand on your thigh but you refused to react.

FP took the hint and left the car, heading into his trailer.

You sighed and leant your head forward onto your steering wheel. Why did things have to get so much more complicated?

You found yourself outside your childhood house after leaving Sunnyside. You wanted to talk to Archie. You were genuinely worried for your dad but it wasn't the right time for you to be back in the house. No matter how much you clashed heads at the moment, you knew he was the one in most danger. After all, he was the first one who came to mind when you asked yourself who escape the Black Hood.

You spotted the deputy outside your house staring at you and so you left. You headed to the White Wyrm for a while. You didn’t know where else to go, you didn’t want to be at the trailer alone with FP right now. You couldn’t believe that was something you could of ever thought but things weren’t right and with the Black Hood’s return it was best to keep your distance.

You didn't return to Sunnyside until late and fortunately Juggy was home which meant no alone time with FP.

The next day you had to return to school. You spent the whole day inside your own head, your thoughts getting the best of you.

“Veronica, have you seen Archie today?” You raced after the younger girl as she made her way to the cafeteria.

“No, I was going to ask you the same thing. He hasn’t been responding to my texts.” She looked equally worried as you felt.

“Weird. I’ll head home after school, I finish early due to free periods anyway and see if he’s there.” You had a bad feeling about this but then again he could be working for Hiram and not wanting to tell Ronnie. Hiram was also going behind people’s backs so you wouldn't be surprised if Archie was picking up the bad habit.

You rushed home after school and knocked on the door.

“Is Archie home?” You asked as soon as your dad opened the door.

“No, he hasn’t come back yet. He left this morning for school. Why?” He seemed slightly surprised that uni were on his doorstep but the question about Archie made him suspicious.

“No reason. I just wanted to talk to him, he’s probably at Veronica’s. Don’t worry. Bye.” You tried to end the conversation quickly so you could get back to the car.

You rang Archie but it went straight to voicemail.

“Archie, where are you? I’m worried. Call me.” You left a message before hanging up and texting Veronica that he wasn’t at home.

You didn’t receive a response from Veronica until an hour later whilst you were working to say Archie’s called her and it’s fine but you couldn’t help but feel like she was hiding something. You tried calling Archie again but he didn’t pick up.

“Come on, Archie.” You muttered as you rang him again.

“(Y/n)?” Pop called your name from out front and your tucked your phone away.

“Sorry, Pop’s.” You apologised for making him wait as you picked up the empty. plates and glasses from around the tables in the diner.

Another hour and a half went by and the lack of response from Archie was driving you up the wall.

“Pop, is it okay if I leave early today? I’m really not feeling well.” You made up some excuse to leave your shift unfinished and go investigate where the hell your baby brother has gotten to.

Pop reluctantly gave in as you did work more shifts than you were contracted to anyway and it was more than clear something was bothering you.

You headed to the trailer park so you could grab your phone charger and change out of your work uniform since you had spilt half a milkshake on your skirt when you heard your phone go off earlier but it was only from Toni asking if you’d be around the Wyrm later.

When you got to Sunnyside, you noticed a car in your usual parking space. You pulled up behind in and that’s when you noticed FP’s door was open.

You felt your heart drop down into your stomach as you slowly approached the steps to the trailer.

Inside, you could see FP.

FP and Alice Cooper.

FP has his arms wrapped tightly around Alice as she cried into his arms. It reminded you of all the times you’d been in her place.

You took a step backwards, your whole body felt as heavy as stone. A stick on the earth beneath your feet gave away your presence as FP looked over to you through the door.

His stare seemed to send a shock wave through you and sent you flying towards your car with tears threatening to spill down your cheeks. You backed out of your spot and left Sunnyside in the dust.

You tried calling Archie again.

“Pick up... Pick up.. Pick up! Fuck!” You grew more annoyed with every ring and eventually threw your phone into your passenger seat. A car horn startled you as you started to drive onto the wrong side of the road, your eyes shot up to the car in front of you and you swerved off the road onto the grass, missing a tree by an inch.

Your car let out an ugly sound as steam gushed out of the hood. You let the tears fall from your eyes as you rolled your head back against your seat, your knuckles turning white form the grip you had on the steering wheel.

FP pulled Alice into his arms as she broke down in front of him. He was shocked to say the least with all the information that fluttered out of Alice’s mouth.

There was a sharp snap at the door and FP’s eyes met yours.

He saw the hurt flush your face before you ran off.

He knew he couldn’t chase after you, not with Alice in the state she was in. You’d have to wait. As much as he didn’t want to leave you upset, he had more pressing matters to deal with.

Alice pulled away, slightly calmer now and explained more about Chic. He was tied up in Alice’s basement at that current moment and flashbacks about Jason Blossom and the drug dealer from before tortured him. He wasn’t going to let Jughead be dragged into this. Not the way he was with Jason Blossom.

FP scooped up his phone and jacket as Alice waited for him to get ready to return to her house, he took a second to look at his phone but no messages from you appeared.

“Come on.” FP placed his hand on Alice’s back and ushered her out the door. He couldn’t let you affect him right now but he knew he’d hurt you and it hurt him. After everything you’d done for him, the past week or so had been torturous as he fought with himself and his feelings.

You had managed to stop crying when you finally decided to call a tow truck. Your phone was almost dead, you still hadn’t heard from Veronica or Archie.

It was dark now. You managed to get out of the car, taking a half empty bottle of whiskey with you which you had forgot about as it sat on your back seat.

You tugged your Serpents jacket tightly around you as you sat on the hood of your car which had fortunately stopped steaming a while ago.

You’d almost finished the bottle by the time you saw headlights approach you.

“Need a ride?” It was Sweet Pea.

You shook your head.

“Tow truck should be here any second now.” You raised your wrist your to nose to wipe it with your sleeve.

“You alright?” Sweet Pea could see your smudged mascara from a mile off even in the dark.

“Peachy.” You lied. Sweet Pea sent you a look of sympathy just as the tow trucks headlights made an appearance.

“Sure you don’t want that ride? I’m heading back to Sunnyside anyway.” Sweet Pea stuck around as the tow truck hooked your car up to take it to the garage.

“I don’t want to go back to FP’s.” You openly admitted.

“Then don’t. There’s spare trailers at Sunnyside, you know. But you can’t just stay here.” Sweet Pea offered you his spare helmet and after a short pause you decided to take it.

He drove you back to the trailer park and you noticed FP’s trailer had no lights on. No one was home. Perfect timing.

You unlocked the door and grabbed your bag, throwing in your clothes and belongings.

You heard the trailer door behind you open as you rushed around the trailer.

“Hey, what’s going on here?” Jughead was the first one to enter, he looked at you with a look of confusion as you piled your things together.

“I’m leaving.” You admitted. “Tonight.”

“Hey, woah, woah...” FP entered behind Jug and tried taking hold of the bag in your hand. “Let’s talk about this.”

“You’re going home?” Jughead asked, referring to the Andrews residence.

“There’s an empty trailer on the other side of the trailer park. I work enough to afford rent, I’ll be out of your boys way.” You tugged the bag away from FP, trying your hardest not to look him in the face afraid you’ll start tearing up again.

“This late at night? Just stay until the morning. We can help you tomorrow.” FP tried his best to get you to stay.

“No. I’m leaving tonight.” You refused to change your mind, flinging your hair up into a pony tail to get it out of your face.

“Well, let us help you now.” Jughead moved to get some bedding from the cupboard and faced you with a sincere look upon his face.

“It’s fine, Jug.” You tried to take the bedding from him but he stepped backwards and headed towards the door.

You figured it was easier to not resist the help from Jughead as he helped you take your stuff to the trailer across the park.

“Where’s your car?” Jughead asked as you lugged the stuff over on foot.

“Engine problems.” You said, not lying entirely but not telling the whole truth.

“Look, (Y/N), I don’t know what’s happened for you to suddenly want your own space but you can talk about it, you know?” Jughead almost made you smile with how much he was trying.

“There’s just a lot going on right now, Jug.” That’s all he was going to get from you that night and he took the hint.

“Right, I’ll come round with some cereal tomorrow, I doubt you had the time to food shop with this impromptu move.” Jughead said lightheartedly,

“Goodnight Jug.” You walked him to the front door and closed it as he returned to his own home.

It wasn’t long after he left that you had a knock on the door.

“Jug, whatever it is, I don’t need it tonight––” You opened the door to see it wasn't Jughead at all.

“Do you really think it’s a smart move to be living alone right now?” FP had a face of fury as he stood on the outside of your trailer.

“Goodnight FP.” You went to close the door on him only for his hand to stop you as he forced his way into your trailer, closing the door behind him.

“Don’t shut me out, girl.” FP warned you.

“Shut you out? That’s rich.” You scoffed, folding your arms across your chest.

“In case you forgot, there’s a murderer on the loose. Killing victims he believes have sinned.” FP ignored your remark,

“Actually it's kind of hard to forget that when that same murderer tried to kill my own father.” You snapped back.

“(Y/n), what are you doing?” FP sighed, gesturing to the trailer around you.

“Giving you space. Giving me space. Every time I look at you, I see you with Alice Cooper or looking at Alice Cooper or at Alice Cooper’s house! All I have done is be there and I don’t want to be there anymore if Alice is there too.” You thought you sounded ridiculous. Like a school girl crushing on her teacher who she couldn’t have.

“Alice? Alice?! Alice came to me earlier because she told me that she kept our kid back from high school and that our kid had died! She blames herself for it. How can I just turn her away when she’s told me that?!” FP argued.

“I’m not just talking about earlier!” You exasperate. “It’s constant.” You almost laughed with the pain filling your chest. “I can’t compete. I’m over here following you around like a little puppy dog, thinking you share the same feelings for me but Alice! Alice will always have her claws stuck into you. Meanwhile, I’m just a stupid girl who got her hopes up too high...” You weren’t aware of the tears now leaving your eyes but FP felt a pang in his gut at the sight of you like this.

“You think I would be risking everything if I didn’t have feelings for you?! Risking losing my son again? Risking my future in this town?” FP couldn’t believe what he was hearing from you. Of course he had feelings for you!

“Exactly! I’m a risk! I’m a problem! Something we have to hide. With Alice, you wouldn’t be risking anything.”

“God, girl...!” FP threw his hands up in frustration and tried to refrain from hitting the side of the trailer. “Alice is married! Her daughter is dating my son! Yes, we have a history, yes I care about her but I care about you! Hell, I care about you a lot more than I care about most people.” FP didn’t hold back, he didn’t want to lose you but you just seemed to be blocking out everything he was saying.

“Please just go.” You closed your eyes and let out a shaky breath. “Please.”

“(Y/n)––” FP started,

“FP. Please.” You opened your glassy eyes as you pleaded.

FP ran his hand over his head as he turned to leave, all he wanted to do was make things right again.

You waited until the trailer door closed completely before you sank down the wall and burrowed your face against your knees; tears freely flowing.

Your phone, which was on charge in the kitchen suddenly buzzed with your ringtone, you got up and picked up the phone.

“Archie?” You asked, relieved that his caller ID finally came up.

“(Y/n), where are you? What’s wrong?” Archie must've heard the upset in your voice.

“Where have you been?” You asked, he was the one who had disappeared all day.

“It’s a long story.” Archie admitted. “I’m coming to Sunnyside now.”

“Hurry.” You ended the call with a whisper and prayed Archie would be quick.

(PART 32)

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talesofealdancynedom · 3 years

Photo

Meriam Craweleoth & Felin Haracwen, as girls in normal nobles clothes, wandering the local magic forest; Hope you didn’t forget chapter one, because it’s about to hurt.

Tale 19: Meriam Craweleoth: Mage Queen of The Grand West (chapter 10.1 -

Another Day 10/10) part 4. Stories of Old

Maps

none

At dawn, Meriam, Fredrick, and Eatheltwein, headed down to the dining hall for breakfast. To their surprise, they saw they had a guest; who was sitting across from princess Charlette, Eathel’s new wife. No one had stopped their intruder for one reason: they had seen him before.

Murdoc was helping himself at the table, surrounded by books, and his panther familiar Stearra, purring at his ankles. He ate like a small child, that just learned to use a spoon. Everyone took their seat, as the servants brought them dishes. They all ate their food quietly as dawn light poured in.

“Pardon me, master Monafyra-” The king started.

“You can call me Murdoc.” He said, without looking up. The pure audacity made everyone in the room livid, but not so much as to make any of them speak up.

“Yes. Murdoc... Why are you in my dinning room? And how and when did you intrude our palace?”

“I walked in the front of course,” Mudoc said, continuing to eat. He was wearing his plum and black wolf fairy robes, which made apear like an animal. He looked older than Meriam had remembered; she had lost track of time.

“You had many guards, but none of them stopped me. Either they knew who I was, or what I was. All of this is irrelevant to the fact I came to deliver some news; again. Then, there was gravy, eggs, and bread; And I saw no point in refusing the kindness of others.” Murdoc continued, whilst gesticulating and chewing. Fredrick waved his hand, letting Murdoc carry on; now that he had finished his food.

“I come to give lord Eatheltwein my journals, as I am retiring form magic to settle down in my homeland; don’t seek me. King Edmond used his power to give me refuge. Th people of The Far North believe mages can be made to give up magic. Your kingdom however, Meriam, is not so polite. I have visited each of our mage friends, only to see a trail of bodies. All our dear friends are nothing more then illustrations of tragedy, on my parchment. At the hands of wizards, I’m sorry to say. Common folk no longer think that mages are necessary to wield magic; as if that’s was all our worth. Even my brother Tiberius, and his daughter Fyra, turned out to be dead on my way here. I have good stealth magic to evade people. Unlike you, Craweleoth.”

“You come to tell us mages are dying, wizardry is spreading, and that the people of the Grand West of Anglia, are coming to kill my wife?” the king coughed.

“Aunt Merry can use time magic; she can get away, I’m sure.” Eatheltwein said, looking at Meriam, who stared back in fear. Everyone knew of the Mage Queen, but no one knew Eatheltwein was a mage. They had been led to believe he was a wizard, just as she had planned.

“You have all the time to run away Meriam, but no matter which way you turn, the events that transpire in Ealden Cynedom always snap back; you will die. Eventually. They will come for you shortly, I suppose.” Murdoc said. Then he read the room. Meriam looked petrified, Charlette was confused, Eathel was sad, and the king looked unwell. “I know death when I see it, my lady.” He concluded. Murdoc got up, thanked the servants, left all his journals next to Eathel and Meriam, and left.

“On a good note, we were invited to the borders of Francia, by my king father; to shake hands for peace! Aren’t you happy Queen Merry? Peace at last! We can all heal because of you.” Charlette chimed. The king coughed on his food, and Meriam rubbed his shoulder staring unblinkingly at Charlette. Eatheltwein seemed exuberant. Charolette’s words did not comfort Meriam. She was equally scared to go to boarder. Meriam hadn’t been there since she was off to get married; and saw her friend be murdered by her own people. To think, she was excited not two days earlier.

The royal court traveled steadily to the border between Francia, and Anglia. It rained, and then it shined, and then they reached the open meadows, that were starting to yellow as harvest season approached. Both parties stood a hill apart. Charlette waved to her father, who walked forward.

“Dear, I still feel unwell. Would you like to shake for peace? This was your mission.” Fredrick asked. Meriam nodded. She slowly walked forward through the grass. It smelled woody and dry, and brushed her skirt like when she used to run around as a girl. She continued onward. The uniforms of the Francian guards accompanying their king, hung loose, and their faces were sad and tiered. Meriam continued. Just at the border pole, Meriam stopped; there was some clover blooming by it, and dirt trailing along the boarder. The king stopped and held out his hand. He was not happy.

“Mage Queen. Your nephew is pleased with my girl, who appears to be in good care. We are tiered, and we wish to retire. Why do you not shack on peace, now that I’m repenting for my foolish legacy? Instead, you stare at clover that is at our feet.” The Francian king snapped. Meriam stared at it, and a tear went down her face.

“Did you know I was born in Francia, by Fort De Lapin. The magic forest of The Rat Rate. I grew up here, and I learned magic here. My mother left, thus my father found the daughter of a warlock, who had also recently had a baby. My milk sister Filen Heracwen, meant the world to me. She died here, trying to see me off as I was forced to marry against my will; she was shot by one of your men, for trying to leave with me. Possibly to send a massage of your own people, the reason doesn’t matter. I bet there isn’t anyone alive who remembers her name, or that she loved magic and her kingdom. She wanted to be my hand maid, and go with me on quests. Yet she died here, without a family to burry her, or siblings to mourn her. She passed before she could wed; unlike me, She wanted to merry a farm boy, and have three kids. Have her first daughter named Odette. Felin thought it was a pretty name for a girl. She went dark to open the Rat Gate, even though she was a commoner, because she loved magic so much, she wanted help it. Yet, she died before wizardry could give her that. And her only kin, uncle Normanwe was not there for her, because he was dying on your behalf in far off battle. I look at the clover, because it reminds me of her. This is the closest thing she will ever get to a funeral. Fourty years too late. I am sad, because I never got to attend. I am sad, because a young lady needlessly died, when she had a future in front of her. I am sad soldiers would kill a civilian. I am sad I got taken away from my home, and now that I am back, I wish to leave.” Meriam sobbed. Her voice echoed across the field to both sides, as it grew in volume and tears. Everyone stopped, and looked at the clover. Everyone had forgotten, or was oblivious to, why Meriam wanted to stop the war so badly. It wasn’t because she saw Francia was an enemy; but because she didn’t want anyone else to die. It was too sad. Meriam didn’t want to have this funeral. Everyone began to cry, and not know why. In the absence of a head stone, or body, they felt like they were attending the wake of not just a girl, who could have lived, but for everyone they loved who died; For a war that had long lost its purpose, and unjustly claimed many. Everyone, on every side, had lost someone. And no one, on either side, had truly had the time and relief to just mourn. Meriam, who was considered the most formidable player around the world, reached out and shock the king’s hand. She held her chest and went to her knees wailing alone in the field. Shacking the hand of a man who was responsible for her pain. At long last, Meriam no longer felt hate, only pain.

When they arrived home, the king was ill. No doctor could figure out why, but he remained in bed. Meriam tended him, while Eatheltwein took up royal duties. Fredrick would not get better, no matter the rest or medicine provided. Meriam even tried magic methods. She was given her own chambers, as they feared she would catch his sickness. Then one mourning, the doctor came to Meriam in her study, and told her the man she loved, wed, and had shaped her whole life, was dead. He had lived long, but Meriam wished she could give him more time. She could, with magic, but she pushed away that intrusive thought. We will all die eventually; she could hear Murdoc say in her mind. But time is precious, and she could not let go of the possibility of saving everyone, if she went back for them. Meriam took three days to leave her bed. And wore her purple dress to Eatheltwein’s coronation, and to dance with him. She did not smile like the last time she was adorned like a courtly lady. She wondered if Fredrick would have liked to see her wear his favourite dress one last time. She even wore her Francian pearls, from when she was young, but was never aloud to wear. She wore no makeup, and had a pearl comb holding her hair back in a knot. In the mirror, she had aged half that of her husband, due to magic changing her appearance.

Before bed, she took off the dress and held it; the fabric was still warm. In her bath, Meriam realized she loved that dress too. It felt like she was dancing with Fredrick again when she wore it. Remined her of his smell and smile. The dress was perfect, and barely worn. It was light, airy, flowy, soothing, and feminine. Unlike her black crushed velvet fairy robes. Her protective fairy robes were a magic gift made by the Fairy King, yet had half the value of that periwinkle gown. Then, Meriam wondered something: if all mages had fairy robes, which protect against spell and sword, why did they all die if they knew wizards were coming? Why did they choose to remove their robes and surrender to death? She thought. Meriam did not sleep well, as she mulled over mortality, and impending doom. She didn’t want everyone’s stories to end while hers continued. Her bed felt so cold without Fredrick next to her.

In the middle of the night, Eatheltwein came into Meriam’s new chambers, and sat next to her bed.

“Are you awake, aunt Merry?” He asked. Meriam shrugged in response. Eathel put the candle on the side table, and lay next to her on top of the sheets.

“Charlette told me to come and see how you’re doing; without uncle. I am so sad. We have peace at our borders, and wives hold their husbands; but you are alone. No other mages, children, or husband. Just me. I will miss you too someday. Are you also scared of the Wizards? What will you do if they come here for the raven gate, and for you?” Eatheltwein whispered. Meriam never thought about that. She was busy wishing for other people.

“I wish you to tell everyone you’re a wizard, and to not go into the shadow veil to see your cousin Odette. I want you to hide, bury or destroy the Raven Gate, so no one wanders into it. I want you to be happy, when I’m gone.”

“You would let them take you, so that they can feel secure? Even if it is a lie, and mages will still be born to magic families?”

“I don’t know. But I think that may have been what happened to my friends around the world. Remember Eathel; magic does not have sides, or possess malice. It would make sense not to fight, and instead accept destiny.”

“I don’t think your capable of either of those thing’s, aunt Merry.” Eatheltwein laughed. He was still a source of sunshine. Meriam reached over her sheets to hold his hand.

“Can you stay? For tonight.” Meriam asked. Eatheltwein nodded.

“Can we go on one last adventure, before I’m a wizard and king, figuring out how to transition power before our people invent guillotines. For old times sake?” Eatheltwein asked earnestly. Meriam laughed and grabbed his hand closer.

“Yes. Yes, we may your majesty. I think Fredrick would have wanted us to be happy too.”

Just before dawn, while the servants woke and prepared for the day, Eatheltwein and Meriam snuck out of the palace in their fairy robes. A note was left for Charlette; telling her to keep their location secret, unless they never returned. Which she was inclined to do, as keeping secrets is exciting if you’re a noble woman. In the streets, the peasants were busy starting work and waking, and the knights were changing shifts. Merchants started to set up, or pack to leave to their next market. Meriam didn’t even need to freeze time to get by. Only as they reached the Raven Gate, in the square, did Meriam pause time.

“Eathel, where do you want to go?” Meriam said, clasping his hands in excitement. She had hit the point of sadness, that results in manic giddiness when you can no longer cry, and have sleep depravation.

“Bantia! I’ve never herd or seen a single person from the land south the of Dania, and north of The Far South of Hispania. I bet that is the only magic forest you haven’t seen aunt Merry!” Eathltwein gleamed with the glow of dawn.

“No, actually I haven been to the wolf gate in North Moon, nor plan to…. Which means Bntia must have the Tree Gate… Magic plants… That colourful forested area in the shadow veil.” Meriam mused. Now she was curious; her seer nature made her thirst for magic knowledge once more. Meriam grasped Eatheltweins hand, and they leapt into the shadow veil through the Raven Gate one last time.

NEXT--->

<---PREVIOUS

#art #tales of ealdan cynedom #short stories #fantasy #meriam #felin #eatheltwein

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thevelvetseries · 5 years

Text

At Ease Marine

Summary : After being in the Navy for 2 years the oldest Padalecki finally comes home from her mission and finally gets to see her family for the first time in person in 2 years and she couldn’t be happier.

Pairings : Jared Padalecki x Daughter Reader / Genevieve Padalecki x Daughter Reader

Warnings : Fluff, Angst, Family Love

A/N : I have changed the ages of the Padalecki children Tom 16 / Shep 15 / Odette 10

Masterlist

It had been nearly 2 years since I had seen my family in person. I’m Y/N Padalecki, I’m currently 21 years old. I signed up to join the Navy when I was 18 behind my parents back I guess you could say. It’s not like I needed their permission to sign up and once I told them I can feel you know that it didn’t go down a treat at all. My parents where a little upset with me, my father didn’t talk to me for a few days all because I wanted to sever my country and look after it. However, this was something that I needed to do. I wanted to serve and protect my country. It’s not like they couldn’t of seen it coming. Even as a little child I would always say things like I want to help my country and I would always watch army films, I know ironic. I just loved helping people, and I was always fascinated by people stories of why they joined the Army or Navy. So when I told my patents and grandparents at the same time after a family dinner things didn’t really go to plan. I should of know they were going to b a little upset and confused. I spent the day nervous waiting for the perfect time to tell everyone my big little secret. So one Saturday after we finished having a family dinner and we were all relaxing in the family room I decided it was time to tell everyone what I had been hiding from them for the past month and it went a little something like this.

~ Flashback ~

We were just finishing up dinner, mum and grandma had just made a delicious roast dinner and now we were sitting in the living room relaxing, letting our food go down. We were currently watching a movie that Tom wanted to watch. We were coming to the end of the movie when I finally got enough courage to tell my family what I was planning to do with the rest of my life. I took a deep breath and untangled myself from the blanket I was under and slowly got up from the sofa and walking to stand in front of the TV. That’s when everyone looked up at me.

“I need to tell you all something important.” I say while standing up straight to make myself seem bigger than I actually am.

“You know you can tell us anything sweetie.” Mum said while pausing the TV so I had everyone’s attention and they didn’t miss the ending of the movie.

“So, I’ve been doing some thing lately about what I want too with the rest of my life and I’ve come to a decision about what I want to do. I’ve already done something and that something will change this family for awhile I will say, probably forever.” I say while looking at both my parents.

“What you talking about sweetie?” My dad asks while turning his head a little to the side.

The 5 seconds I’m silent for seems like a lifetime. I was about to tell them what I did while the thought I was “away looking at a college” two weeks ago when I was not . I could hear my heart beating in my chest.

“Remember when I said I wanted to go to that college open weekend the other week, and you let me go. What if I told you that was a lie so cover up what I really was going to do that weekend.” I say.

“What you talking about?” My dad says in a stern voice.

“What I mean is that I didn’t go to the college, I act went to a course to see I soemthing was the right fit for me and turns out it was and I dec that I was going to sign up to join the Navy, and I did” I say. Nobody spoke. However, I felt free. I wasn’t ashamed of what I was going to do. This is something that I’ve always wanted to do and they weren’t going to o be able to stop me.

“What do you mean you signed up to join the Navy?” Dad said while scooting closer to the edge of the sofa.

“I want to serve for my county. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do. It’s not like I’ve hid that from anyone.” I say

“No. You’re not.” Dad said before standing up. “I wont allow it.”

“Well that’s too late. I’m 18, well nearly 19, I don’t need your permission to do this anymore. It’s already done. There’s no turning back now.” I say calmly.

That’s when dad walked out of the room and went upstairs. “Mum” I say looking back at her.

“I… I…” she took a deep breath. “I didn’t really know you were thinking of doing this? I know you always wanted to help people but I thought maybe as a policewoman or doctor or something not a marine.”

“I’m not sorry, this is something I just have to do.” I say.

I wasn’t drafted right away about 6months later I was called and I needed to be at Norfolk Naval station, VA on the 24th July at 0800 hours. The mission I was going on didn’t have a end date yet, so I hd no idea how long I was going to be gone for. I said goodbye to my family and headed out to help my fellow citizens.

~ Flashback Over ~

I was currently docking in Norfolk after being away or nearly 2 years. I’m now 21 years old. I had been working aside other people like me. We had finally finished our mission we were given. While I was away I had made some real fiends or family as that matter who I would protect with all my life. While I’ve been away I stayed in contact with my family and getting updates about everyone. My siblings are older and more wiser. I did some recon with my fathers security guard Cliff. I sent him a little later while I was away saying I was coming home and needed his help to surprise my family. Turns out the weekend I was coming home was a convention weekend and my whole family was going to be there. He helped me get home back to Texas. I got everything I needed before heading out to see my family and I couldn’t knock the smile off my face.

Since it was currently convention season for Supernatural. Jared, Jensen, Misha, basically everyone who was one the show was at this one place, even their families. When I reached the hotel where the convention was being set I message Cliff and he came a met me and showed me where my room was, he told me that my dad and Jensen’s panel was starting in 5 minutes and it would be on for an hour. So I quickly took a shower, making sure to not get my hair wet and got dressed in my Navy uniform and messaged Cliff that I was on my way down. At this moment in time Jared and Jensen were about 20 minutes into doing the panel. I made my way backstage but was hiding behind a curtain nobody knew I was there. I could see my mum and siblings and even Danneel and the little ackles, who aren’t little either. They all really grew other the past 2 years. I stayed standing listening to the people I loved talk about random things which was nice to hear other than hearing talks about attacks it was nice to hear my dad unfunny jokes again in person. That’s when the next person came to a mic to ask a question and ask “What do you think your children would say was the best thing you’ve done as a parent was?” Nobody knew that their children was there so Tom, Shep, Odette, JJ, Arrow and Zep all walked onto the stage while the crowed screamed. The ackles answered first. Then Tom, Shep and O did right before she finished I slowly made my way onto the stage from the side. The crowd grew louder making everyone on stage look back but nobody was there since I was to the side. I then spoke into the mic I was given.

“I would say the best thing my parents have one for me was to let me be who I am and to not be afraid to go after something that means something to me. They showed me that the power os love and kindness really is the key to living a good life” I say while walking slowly to my father who had tears forming in his eyes. That’s when mum ran onto the stage and my whole family circled my into a hug and didn’t let go for a good few minutes. I was finally home with my family and I couldn’t ask for anything better than this moment right here.

After awhile we all went back behind the stage and waited for the panel to be over. I stayed sitting with my mum holding her hand just catching up and laughing along with my siblings and having a nice time with my family. Once the angel finished my dad came rushing down the steps from the stage looking for me. I got up and rushed into his arms and hugged him for dear life. For the rest of that night we stayed together as a family, I went back to my room got changed into some normal clothes and we all went out for dinner and then went back to mum and dad hotel room since they booked out a big room so we could all be there when not sleeping and we spent the night watching movies before all falling asleep on the sofas in the room. I was home and I couldn’t be happier than this moment in time.

It was time to find a new dream to live. I was thinking of still working for the Navy just not a a marine, maybe one of their detectives. Who knows.

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lizacstuff · 4 years

Note

Started watching Sen Cal Kapimi after seeing all your cute Gifs and I love it!!! Serkan & Eda are my whole heart at this point and the full cast is just amazing together. I just finished episode 19 and Eda is finally going to learn the truth about her parents death. And I am finally going to dive into the latest episodes that have been causing a lot of drama in the fandom. I love Serkan and I love Eda but right now I am team Eda while at the same time rooting for them to figure things out. After seeing comments about the last few episodes, I think fans really under estimate how much Serkan breaking up with her really hurt her. And now this secret will be added on top of that. I get that he has been hurting as well but she has been in the dark about everything. Eda should be able to take whatever time she needs to figure out how she wants to move forward. We all know that Serkan loves her more than anything and so does she deep down but she has really got to be questioning things she thought she knew about their mutual feelings & relationship since he broke up with her. And honestly not really digging the idea that another woman going after Serkan needed to be brought in to get Eda to sort through her feelings. Not very fair to Eda’s character at all but I know she will handle it like the queen she is. Looking forward to the next few episodes. Thanks again for talking about this show. I trust you since we have a mutual love for Max & Liz from Roswell New Mexico as well. Thank goodness the writing on Sen Cal Kapimi is a million times better and the episodes are longer so none of the good stuff gets cut out.

Hello fellow Echo fan!!!! Welcome! As a side note, I am so hungry for RNM spoilers and we are getting almost nothing! With the pandemic, and a change in showrunner, the cast and crew are really buttoned up this season and not sharing much of anything. However, I really need them to feed me! LOL.

I’m so happy you’re enjoying Sen Cal Kapimi, Serkan and Eda have just taken over my fandom life, I love them, they’ve been such a nice oasis in the wasteland of 2020.

100% agree that lots of people who are impatient with Eda are not really looking at it from her perspective. It’s only been 5 days since she returned to the office after finding out why he broke up with her and she’s still trying to protect her heart. I know he was trying to do the right thing, but he ended up ripping out her heart. If she needs, I don’t know, a full week to come to terms with things before abandoning the guard rails she put in place (contract), I don’t think that’s egregious. And honestly I don’t think she needed the woman to be brought on to sort out her feelings, it’s may just excelerate it a little while providing some drama and comedy for the show.

Once you finish the episodes, treat yourself and go catch up on some of the BTS stuff from this show. I’d start with the lives, go to youtube, search for ‘Hande and Kerem instagram live english’ or ‘Hanker instagram live english’ and make sure you have some time, because there are a lot of them. Super fun to watch, they tell some good stories, joke a lot, and random other cast/crew members pop up here and there in them.

So glad you’ve joined us!

#sen cal kapimi #asklizac #sckask #lovely shipmates #Anonymous

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let-it-raines · 5 years

Text

Catch Me If You Can (33/40)

298 days. That’s how long Killian Jones was away from a baseball field. It’s less than a year, only part of a season for him, but it might as well have lasted a decade as he alternated between physical therapy and spending an excessive amount of time sitting on his couch.

But then he came back and won the World Series.

It’s something no one saw coming, and it’s certainly not something anyone who knows about his arm would predict. Now it’s a new season with new possibilities, and anything could happen. On-field reporter Emma Swan will be there to cover it all even if she is not his biggest fan right now.

Asking her out live on-air will do that.

Rating: Mature

a/n: This is one of my favorite chapters, but then again, like, 25/40 of these chapter are my favorite. Haha. Thanks to @resident-of-storybrooke for reading all of these words what feels like a million years ago!

I apologize for the erratic posting schedule, but it will probably be like that for awhile. I have all of these chapters ready to be posted. I just have to, you know, post them! 🙈

Found on AO3: Beginning | Current

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-/-

“Woah, what are you doing here?”

Emma turns to look back at Ruby standing in the doorway to the living room. She’s already dressed for work, much like Emma is, but she has no idea why Ruby is asking her what she’s doing there.

“Making myself a bowl of cereal?” Emma answers as she pours the Cheerios into her bowl. “Why wouldn’t I be here?”

Ruby’s heels click against the tile floor, and suddenly she’s standing in front of Emma with her perfectly manicured brow raised. “I sleep here. Like, every night. You, however, do not. Is Killian here?”

“No, he’s at his apartment.” Emma walks around Ruby to open the fridge and grab a gallon of milk, twisting the top open and pouring it in her bowl. “I’m here nearly every day, Rubes. I don’t know why you’re so shocked.” She scoops up a spoonful and takes a bite only for Ruby to still be staring at her. “What?”

“You,” she starts, picking up the milk and putting it back in the fridge, “are here most days, but you don’t sleep here. And if you do, there’s usually a scruffy baseball player drinking coffee and making eyes at you in the mornings. This is a rare sight. The guys made the playoffs last night? You two didn’t go out celebrating?”

“We do not make eyes, and nope, we didn’t,” Emma answers quickly before shoveling more cereal in her mouth. “What time do you want to leave to go into the office today? And do you want to go to the Stadium directly after? Or should we come back here first?”

Ruby’s eyes squint, suspicion obvious in them, and Emma is sure that she’s not going to make it to work this morning without an even more thorough interrogation. That’s exactly why she came here last night after the game instead of going to Liam and Elsa’s. She didn’t want to have everyone asking how her day went or how she’s still dealing with things. There was always a chance that Ruby and Graham would be in the living room awake when she got home, but since Ruby was able to leave the stadium far before Emma was last night, she figured that she had a chance of sneaking in unnoticed.

She did.

This is her first time actually seeing Ruby since Thursday night of last week, and she just knows that Ruby is chomping at the bit to talk more about everything that’s happened.

After all of the stares and cat calls that Emma got yesterday, she doesn’t have the energy to talk about it. Not to David or Elsa or Ruby.

Not to Killian.

She’d texted him and feigned not feeling well, telling him not to worry about her and that she’d spend the night at home.

There’s less than a one percent chance that he didn’t realize that it was lie.

And now she’s kind of freaking out at the implication that she’s basically living with Killian. Emma knows that it’s true, that she’s almost always staying in his apartment to the point that she shopped for groceries for his apartment the other day without even thinking about it, but hearing it in such concrete words freaks her out the slightest bit.

There’s a difference between regularly sleeping over and officially moving in.

It’s been six months. She loves him and wants to live with him at some point, but she’d rather like to keep the option of having her own place.

Possibly. She doesn’t know. It’s…she doesn’t know what she wants right now.

Her mind doesn’t need any extra thoughts running around in there when it’s still running rampant with worry for Killian over how he’s doing and fear of her life getting even more hectic than it was eleven months ago.

It’s already more hectic. She had someone follow her home last night bombarding her with questions about her relationship with Killian. She’s surprised he doesn’t know about it yet and hasn’t called her insisting that he do something to help it stop. What he would do, she doesn’t know, but she knows he would try to do something.

“No, no, no,” Ruby protests, “you’re not getting out of this conversation that easily. I haven’t seen you in days, not even at work, and our texts this weekend are not cutting it for me knowing what’s going on. Are you and Killian okay? Why aren’t you together?”

“Because I’m allowed to spend time on my own,” she bites out, putting her bowl on the counter before crossing her arms over her chest. “Believe it or not, I don’t need a man to survive.”

Ruby practically recoils, hurt quickly crossing her face, and Emma immediately knows that she’s fucked up.

“Hey, hey, Rubes,” she starts, an apology on her lips. “I’m sorry. I didn’t – I didn’t mean to snap at you like that. My mind is all over the place right now. I’ve had a shitty few days, and I didn’t mean to take it out on you. That’s not an excuse, but it’s mine.”

Suddenly, Ruby is reaching forward and pulling Emma into a rough hug, practically smothering her, and all Emma can do is hold on while Ruby rubs circles up and down Emma’s back. Emotion lodges itself in Emma’s throat, and she chokes it back down while holding onto Ruby a little bit tighter.

“I’m so tired,” Emma murmurs into Ruby’s neck. “I couldn’t…everyone just looked at me yesterday like I had a giant tattoo on my forehead telling everyone that I don’t deserve anything I have. And if they weren’t looking at me for that, they were looking at me thinking they knew everything about my life because Killian’s entire past has been splashed out on front pages.”

“How do you know they were looking at you like that?”

“You can just tell. I felt eyes on me all damn day, and now I have to do it again today and tomorrow and pretty much every day for the next month.”

Ruby hums as she keeps rubbing Emma’s back, and Emma doesn’t know what the hell she would ever do without Ruby Lucas. “Remember that time last year when this really hot asshole baseball player asked you out on live television? And remember how stressed you were every time we went out and someone brought it up or every time your name was mentioned online?”

“Yeah,” Emma laughs, pulling back from Ruby a bit so she’s not quite as smothered. “What about it?”

“You made it through that, sweetie. You did. And obviously this is a little different, even if the hot asshole baseball player is still involved, but you’re going to make it through this too. Walsh Osborne doesn’t even deserve to be the trash on the cement. He is lower than that, and he is not going to bring you or Killian down with him, okay?”

“Yeah,” Emma sighs, “okay.”

“Woah,” Graham murmurs as he walks into the kitchen adjusting his shoulder strap over his uniform, “what are you doing here? Is Killian here too? I wanted to talk to him.”

All Emma can do is laugh.

She finishes her cereal, and then she and Ruby leave for the offices, walking the few blocks to their subway station before taking the ten minutes ride to midtown. There’s one camera on her when she leaves her apartment, but Emma ignores it as best she can, making sure not to speak or flash any angry faces. It’s ridiculous, actually, what people will do for the smallest of stories. She’s obviously a journalist, but she would never.

Invasions of privacy like that are a huge deal, and what is anyone really going to learn from how someone looks coming out of their apartment?

Ruby leaves her to go to the fourth floor for some kind of production meeting while Emma rides the elevator up to the seventh so that she can go to her office for a little bit before she has to go to a meeting to talk about the post-season.

Killian: Are you feeling better today?

Emma both smiles and cringes at the text. She didn’t feel well last night, but it wasn’t because she was sick. She shouldn’t have lied to him like that, especially with their history, but she did. She’ll have to fix it tonight.

Emma: Yeah, I am. Can I come over after the game?

Killian: Always.

Emma grins down at her phone before putting it back in her purse and stepping off the elevator. It’s pretty empty, most people not in quite yet, and she takes that as a good sign as she walks the long way around the cubicles back to her closet of an office only to find the last person that she wanted to see standing there waiting for her.

Walsh.

She knew he would be in the office today. David told her that he was under investigation but not fired quite yet. It would take a few days. But still. No amount of mental preparation could have prepared her for the fact that he would be standing outside of her office very obviously waiting for her to show up.

Asshole.

What did she ever see in him?

“What could you possibly want?”

The smile that curves across his lips is downright disgusting, and a shiver runs down her spine because of it. “I wanted to talk about the fact that you’re a bitch, and I’m getting fired because of you.”

Emma scoffs and pulls out her key to open her office door, brushing past him. “Well, I heard that you were simply under investigation, but you’re definitely getting fired after calling me a bitch. That’s against HR policy.”

“Really? HR policy? That’s what you’re going with?”

Could he be any more of a dick?

Emma puts her purse down on her desk and turns to look at him with her arms crossed over her chest, defenses up. This is a man who once made her laugh and who she once thought that she loved. She can’t even see the remnants of that man anymore. She hasn’t been able to in the past three years.

“You fucked up, Walsh,” she states as plainly as possible while trying to keep her voice calm and her anger under wraps when all she really wants to do is slap him. “You thought you got some great exclusive when all you did was write a cheap article spread with half lies you dug into the back alleys of gossip magazines to find and snippets of truth. You can get sued for libel, you know? And since I know you don’t have any particular skills outside of journalism and being an asshole, I’m not really sure what you’ll do when your career goes down the drain. Then again, if you were that good of a journalist, you wouldn’t have slapped your name on the article.”

There was so much shitty stuff in that article, and Emma doesn’t even know how he found out about Milah or the legal dealings of Killian’s accident, but Walsh making unfounded accusations may have been the worst part. He obviously couldn’t help himself.

“You’re so smug. You know that? You’ve always been so damn smug. I always hated that about you, but you were hot enough that I let it slide. Apparently, you’re also hot enough to fuck Jones in an attempt to boost your career. It’s a pity that probably won’t work out. Think about all of the other women who fucked him. What are they doing now?”

Emma flinches and bites the inside of her cheek so hard that she can taste blood. He’s trying to hurt her. He’s already lost. His career is already ruined. The best he can hope for is to work at some cheap gossip mag. The high of knowing he was going to hurt her and hurt Killian obviously pushed him into writing this article, and he figured he could ride on the wave of it.

False articles don’t bring him enough money to ride out the rest of his life.

It’s nothing but momentary fame for him, and honestly, who even cares about the name at the top when all of the information everyone wants is below that?

It’s really damn hard not to slap him right now.

She can barely breathe.

“If you honestly think I started fucking Killian so that I could commentate on a singular game this season, you’re delusional. In fact, I know that you’re delusional. You have always been bitter and petty over every little thing I have done that you didn’t get to do.”

“That didn’t seem to bother you when we were dating. I think you forget that we dated.”

“Oh no, I remember. I remember exactly how demeaning and misogynistic that you were then too. You never congratulated me for any of my achievements. All you did was talk down to me, as if you were somehow better and knew more when we had the same damn job for three years. I have no idea what your vendetta with me is, Walsh. You cheated on me. You betrayed every bit of trust that I had in you. I didn’t do that to you, so I can’t understand what you could possibly still be mad about.”

“You’re so damn harsh, Emma.” She scoffs at that and rolls her eyes while anger practically radiates off of her body. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you to lighten up a little bit? To smile?”

She’s going to get arrested for assault. It’s going to happen. Because there is no way she’s not knocking the teeth out of this bastard.

“You,” Emma spits, straightening her back to make herself eye level with him with the help of her heels, “are nothing to me. You think that you’ve somehow pulled the rug out from under me and that you’re going to take me down while also hurting someone I love, but you’re not. You have accomplished nothing but getting yourself fired. You were waiting outside my office door this morning because you wanted to see the hurt on my face as some kind of sadistic payoff. You’re not going to. I hope you get everything that you deserve in life. Now get the fuck out of my office.”

She expects more of a fight with him with more empty words. He’s never known when to shut up or when the fight is done. But surprisingly, he walks out with a word with his tail between his legs, slamming the door shut behind him so that it shakes in the frame.

As soon as it settles, though, Emma falls down in her chair and hides her face in her hands as she tries to catch her breath and stop the silent sobs from coming. That was too much. This is all too much, and she can’t breathe.

She simply can’t.

Never again does she want to see his face or hear his name.

Never again does she want to allow him to occupy so much space in her mind that it blocks out everything else. He is an asshole who is trying to hurt her, and she has let him.

But he can’t know that. She won’t give him the satisfaction.

Clutching the ring against her chest, Emma sucks in a big gulp of air and turns to her desk as she tries to compartmentalize what she has to do today. She needs to sign this paperwork for her time off requests, go to her meeting, and then get the hell out of this office and go to the Stadium where she can hide away in the seas of people who are going to be there.

One by one. She can do one by one.

(She has to.)

-/-

The Yankees win the game in a shut-out in a little over three hours, probably still riding off of the high of making it to the playoffs. Emma likely is too, even if all she wanted was to be able to go home the entire time and change out of these jeans and heels and into pajama pants.

And she really wants to take off her bra.

Instead, she’s wandering back down the hallways of the stadium to the clubhouse getting ready to do post-game interviews with everyone since she didn’t get any while out on the field. The clubhouse is as crazy as ever after a game, everyone yelling as they talk with music blaring while also being in various states of undress. It used to not bother her to see all of these guys changing clothes or walking around nearly nude (sometimes completely nude if she’s honest), but now that she knows several of them personally, she has to look away and turn her attention to something else.

Will Scarlet is a perfectly attractive man, but she does not need to see him naked. There’s no t a lot of coming back from that.

Quickly, she makes her way around the room to those who are dressed with Jeff following her with the camera and runs through her usual questions about the game, trying to get a little insight. It’s always funny to her which guys give insane insight and treat the game like they’re playing a game of chess and which ones give her little grunts and monosyllabic answers, probably not caring to have to answer her questions along with every other reporter in the room.

Emma gets it. They can be annoying.

Eventually things calm down, the music volume lowering and the yelling stopping as managers and trainers walk to their different offices and some of the players move onto their showers or post-game treatments. Jeff left with the camera ten minutes ago, but she’s still having an in-depth conversation with Booth about their prospects for the Series as well as everyone else in both leagues. He’s always the most insightful after possibly Killian (she’s not biased or anything), and he’s a joy to talk to since he actually doesn’t seem bothered having to be talked to by her.

He’s telling her that he thinks the Dodgers will probably be the last men standing in the National League when someone walks past her and hits her shoulder with force. She turns to see Arthur still walking past as he moves to his locker in nothing but a towel. It’s a huge clubhouse. He had room to walk around, and she knows that he did it on purpose.

Asshole.

Why are men such assholes?

Emma goes back to looking at August only for Arthur to speak up. “So, turns out I was right when I said Jones was fucking you, huh?”

He’s got to be kidding.

There is no way she can interact with this many assholes in a row. There’s got to be some kind of limit.

“So, you think it’ll be a repeat of last year’s Championship?” Emma asks August, ignoring Arthur.

August leans back into his locker and stretches his arms forward to crack his knuckles. “I mean, yeah. Hopefully with the same result too.”

“Hopefully,” Emma laughs. “You guys are undoubtedly the best team, but you never know what can happen over seven games, especially when you may be out of a starting pitcher.”

“I’m hoping he can come back in time and isn’t rusty, you know? Obviously, we have a good line up, but Jones has always been our glue. No one gives a better pre-game speech or rallies us even when he’s done for the night. I mean, damn he’s moody sometimes, but that usually works out in our favor.”

Emma grins as a chuckle passes through her lips at Booth’s spot-on description of Killian.

“You don’t have to talk Jones up to her, you know?” Arthur starts, and Emma’s fists immediately clench at her sides. “She may have slept her way into this room, but I don’t think she’s going to move around to each of us. SoSo, there’s really no need to butter her up.”

“Shut the fuck up, King,” August seethes, getting up from his locker’s seat and walking over to Arthur all the while Emma’s heart starts pounding and the air around her gets a little thicker so that her lungs stop working once again. “Everyone in here knows you’re an asshole who can’t keep his mouth shut, and you should have learned your lesson the last time you decided to talk shit about Emma.”

“What? You’re not interested in the fact she she’s sleeping with Jones? How does everyone still think he’s a hero when he jeopardized our season by lying to us about his injury? And why does absolutely no one find it fascinating that he’s sleeping with the reporter who covers all of our games and no one knew about that too? Because I certainly find it all intriguing.”

Emma can’t hear any more of this. She can’t. she knows that she needs to defend herself, to fight back and not let anyone tell her who she is when they’re all wrong. She knows exactly who she is. She doesn’t need to punch back and yell and scream and cause anything else to happen.

So she runs.

She grabs her things and runs out the door of the clubhouse leaving Arthur and August and anyone else who was in that room behind. Maybe she’d react differently if today had started in some other way. Maybe she would be the one to yell back at Arthur and tell him to stop talking shit about her and too her and to get over his weird feelings over her too.

But it’s been a very long four days, and Emma is tired of screaming words that disappear into the void.

Rounding the corner of the hallway, not entirely sure where she’s going to go, Emma finds a little cut out in the wall next to a set of vending machines and sinks down against the wall until she’s on the cold cement ground with her knees pulled up to her chest and her head resting against her forearms while her fingers clutch at the chain around her neck.

This is not like her to fall apart. Not at all. And yet here she is breaking down next to a machine full of chips and crackers and a melted chocolate bar or two.

Footsteps echo down the hallway, and Emma tries to hide a little further into the wall, hoping that whoever it is won’t see her. But they keep on getting closer and closer until a body is sinking down next to her in Yankee-mandated warm-up pants and a pair of worn-down sneakers that she recognizes.

Will Scarlet.

The realization that it’s him has her leaning into his side as he wraps his arm around her shoulder and his hand rubs up and down her bicep in one of the most comforting touches she’s felt all day.

Emma has got to stop falling apart today.

She’s sure she probably will again when she sees Killian and finally tells him how she’s been coping in the past two days. They can have some kind of pity party together.

“When I got called up from the minor leagues,” Will starts, his voice calmer and quieter than she’s ever heard it, “I didn’t know a soul in New York. Seriously, no one. And I walk into the clubhouse for the first time, nerves consuming me, and the first thing that I see is your boyfriend’s bare ass as he was getting it massaged.”

Emma chuckles, her chest moving, and Will keeps moving his hand against her arm. “I was just thinking a few minutes ago about how you guys don’t know how to stay dressed.”

“No, we don’t,” Will continues. “Anyways, so the first sight that I see is his ass. Congratulations on it, by the way. He’s got a good one.”

“Oh my gosh.”

“It’s true. He does. Anyways,” he starts again, and Emma is reminded of how thankful she is for him. Everyone needs a Will Scarlet in their life. “He is the first soul that I met, and I stuck to him because I didn’t know what else to do. I haven’t always been this outgoing, you know? It’s been a journey. And, I mean, I don’t regret any of it. I don’t regret how I made friends with a guy whose ass I saw before his face and who happened to be going through some really though times off the field. He’s one of the best damn friends I’ve ever had, and he’s part of the reason I’m with Belle. He talked me down from my freak-out when we were getting serious, and I didn’t know what to do. I can never give him enough thanks for that and telling me that being in love didn’t have to burn up in flames.”

Emma leans up back against the wall and Will’s arm then, thankful that she can breathe again as she stares out at the cinderblock wall in front of her. “Why are you telling me all of this?”

“Because you ran out of that locker room faster than I’ve ever seen anyone run while wearing heels, and I know that you’re going through a tough time. I also know that you’re probably freaking out a little bit over your relationship. How could you not? So, I thought it’d be nice to hear a little something nice about your boyfriend.”

“So, you’re being his hype man?”

“Only a little,” Will laughs, and Emma’s stomach settles a little bit more. “I also couldn’t think of anything else to say to cheer you up since I’m sure you’re tired of hearing the same thing from everyone who talks to you. People are assholes, Emma. There’s no denying that, but you can’t let people like King and that ex of yours beat you down. You are damn good at your job, and you’ve earned it. And I can guarantee that if anyone ever talks shit about you and Killian again, I’ve got twenty professional athletes who are willing to back you up.”

“Thank you,” she whispers as she leans her head onto his shoulder. “You’re my favorite catcher.”

“Aww, I bet you say that to all of your catchers.”

“Nope, just you.”

“Good. I get a little bit jealous,” he teases, and Emma’s grin stretches across her lips. It’s a genuine smile, the first one she has felt in hours. “Do you want a ride back home? I can take you so you don’t have to take the train.”

“No, no,” she protests as her legs fall to the ground in front of them, “you don’t have to do that. You should go and get dinner with Belle or something, drag her away from all of those books she is proofreading.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure. Thank you, Will.”

“No problem at all, sweetheart.”

-/-

When Emma gets to Killian’s apartment a little over thirty minutes later, she uses her key to go into the back entrance and avoid most of the people out front. She’s tired, even with Will’s pep talk, and all she wants is to be inside the safety and comfort of that apartment and not have to think about doing anything else for the rest of the day.

Killian is sitting on the couch when she walks in, and after slipping out of her heels and reaching up under her shirt to take off her bra, Emma immediately walks over to him and crawls onto his lap, curling around him while his arm comes to support her back and the other hooks under her bent knees.

He’s so warm and smells like the spice of his body wash, and she sighs into it, breathing it all in and reveling in having another set of arms to catch her when she’s falling and feels like everything is slipping away.

Killian’s thumb moves against her bicep, running back and forth in little circles, and she feels him shift her entire body on his lap before the bristle of his whiskesrwhiskers brushes over her forehead.

“Long day?”

“You have no idea.”

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

“Five words: Walsh and Arthur are misogynistic assholes.”

“That’s six words.”

“I added the misogynistic part after I’d already counted the words.”

Killian softly chuckles, and Emma nuzzles a little further into him, her grip on his stomach tightening. “Will and August told me about Arthur. I’m sorry, darling. They won’t do anything about him now because our managers won’t want to lose him before the Series, but hopefully there will be some kind of action taken soon. He doesn’t get to have repeated incidents like that without any consequences.”

“To be fair, you punched him the first time.”

“That I did.” Killian’s hand starts moving up and down the outside of her thigh, and it feels so damn good that her entire body shivers. It’s also what has her leaning back so that she can look in his eyes and see the blue that is written across so many major parts of her life now. “Did something happen with Walsh today too? And don’t think you’re off the hook for last night. I believed you when you said you didn’t feel good, but I know you weren’t sick.”

Of course he knows. Always reading her like a book.

“He confronted me in my office this morning.” Killian’s jaw ticks, and she reaches up her hand to run it across his scruff. She’s too tired for any more anger today. She doesn’t want him to be angry too. “I don’t…he didn’t even make any sense, you know? There’s no reason for him to have done what he did except to hurt me and hurt you since there’s no way he thought he was going to make a lot of money off of this. I think – when he was waiting for me outside of my office, it made me realize that all he really wanted was to finally push me into the ground so hard that there was no way that I’d ever be able to get back up.”

The sigh Killian releases is so loud that she feels it run its course throughout her own body, and his palm stops moving against her thigh before it starts again and moves over all of the curves of her body before Killian is holding her cheek and looking at her like she was the one to hang the stars in the sky and keep them glowing each night.

Being looked at like that will never not cause her breath to still.

“Have I ever told you how incredible you are? Because I…I don’t know how I got to be so lucky to have someone like you in my life. You are walking through fire both for me and because of me, and I don’t deserve that from you.”

“You do,” she promises as her heart does that thing again where it beats a little too fast while her stomach swoops. Emma leans forward and kisses Killian, something slow and lazy and just what they both need. She could spend all day right here in his arms kissing him while everything else fades into the background. “You do, and you’re walking through fire because of me too. We’re in this together, twenty-nine.”

“I think we make a pretty good team.”

“Obviously the best team. We’d win all of the trophies.”

“So many that we wouldn’t even have a place to store them.”

“Oh, well, we can keep them in my apartment because Ruby called me out and said I never stay there anymore.”

Killian raises a brow, a Cheshire Cat grin spreading across his lips. “Well…”

“What?” she laughs, slapping him.

“You really don’t, love,” Killian explains. She can tell he’s holding back laughter. “You’re maybe sleeping over there once a week when you’re not traveling. You’ve kind of taken over my apartment.”

“I have not.”

“I found at least fifteen bobby pins when I was vacuuming today. How do you lose so many of those damn things?”

“It just kind of happens.”

“I found some in the gym. You don’t even go in the gym when you’re here.”

Emma shrugs her shoulders. “Magic, maybe?”

“Yeah,” he laughs as he stands from the couch and brings her up with her while she squeals at the sudden movement, “sure. Something like that. C’mon, Swan. I have missed you terribly these past two days, and I think it’s time you become reacquainted with my bed. It has missed you for at least five days now.”

“For sleeping purposes, right?”

Killian winks at the same time that his tongue runs across her teeth. “Sure. We’ll go with that.”

#catch me if you can #cs fic #cs ff #captain swan fic #captain swan ff #captain swan

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