#hypnone's disabled ghouls

[hypnoneghoul]

Do Not Go Away

WC: 13k

Relationship: Rain/Dewdrop, Rain/Everyone, not rel. focused

Tags: Disability, Chronic Illness, EDS, POTS, Lots of Crying, Angst with a Happy Ending, Passing Out, Depressive Episode, Abandonment Issues, Self-Hatred, Marriage Proposal, Unreliable Narrator, Mild Suicidal Thoughts, Panic Attacks

"You finally did it, you pushed us all away.  Congratulations, Rain. You are free." Or how Rain's body finally gives up and he gives up with it.

Notes: This is me expanding on this post in a heartbreaking way. Also making my worst fears come true for Rain, sorry not sorry, but at least at the end of the day he's not alone, right? While it's not my best work it's the most important and personal to me, I hope you'll like it. It's multi chaptered on ao3 so it's easier to grab a hold of an read bit by bit.

Read under the cut or on AO3.

Now with art from Nono and Felix

Nobody really knows what went wrong with Rain’s summoning. Nobody really knows if it  all originated from it, anyway. At least he’s not the only one, Zephyr is still there. What a thing to bond over, they have.

Rain was never doing good. Never good, just decent. He was tired all the time. And in pain.

“It is what it is,” he always said, shrugging. “It’s what comes with a faulty vessel.”

He was used to it already. Or was he?

He could deal with it, mostly. Sometimes it was better, sometimes it was worse, but in general he was okay. He had his pack, he had his music. He was okay.

Until he was not.

Until all he could do was lay and stare at the ceiling, without any power to move, with a lump in his throat, because everything hurt, the world was spinning and he was too exhausted to even cry. His phone was thrown somewhere next to him or on the bed, battery either already out or just right about to be. He could have grabbed it and sent a text—would his fingers manage? Hell, he could have even screamed—to someone, anyone, ask for…

For what, exactly?

Help? Help in what? There’s no helping him, is there? He’s broken and that’s it.

That is why he would just lay there, unable to move, unable to cry, unable to fall asleep, listening to his own shallow breathing and racing heart and feeling all the pain coursing through his damaged body.

Until it would be decent again.

Until the day when the decent would not come back.

This day was near, and Rain knew it.

The tour has never seemed so long. Maybe it never was, but Rain wasn’t bothered enough to actually check the dates and do the math. It’s not like it would change anything, would it?

He was a ghost. He was just there, barely present, just doing what he absolutely had to, and that was it. He was in pain, and despite the exhaustion he saw what it was doing to his packmates. They all had their own aches and they were equally tired, he hated that he was causing them distress just by… by existing.

Rain tried to convince himself it wasn’t his fault, he was summoned that way and most of the time he was careful as to not make it all worse. He knew his limits and usually did not go beyond them. Usually.

He hated that he was like that, broken, whether it was his fault or not. What did he do to deserve it? Most importantly, what did his packmates do to deserve to be burdened by his existence? What did Papa do?

The water ghoul tried his best to not be bigger of a bother than he already was. Swiss and Dewdrop usually called him a dumbass for that, told him that he was a bother only when sulking around with a frown on his pretty face. He always smiled at that, but when they looked away that frown always returned. No matter how much he appreciated the jokes, they weren’t fixing anything.

That was back home, in the Abbey.

Now, well into another tour, the rest didn’t even try the jokes. If they saw Rain needed them, they’d just quietly slip their hands into his and pull him away onto a couch or a bunk and hold him, sometimes letting him just cry it out. He used to feel better after that, just being with them, whoever it was. It was hard to believe that they still loved him, despite all, but some part of Rain’s brain knew it was the truth. It was what kept him alive.

He wanted to give them something in return, but he simply couldn’t. There was nothing but his body, the same one that caused all the problems in the first place. He didn’t have the energy for sex, not even the softest moments with one of his mates, not even if they’d do all the work. He knew they’d do anything for him, but he also knew he’d pass out the moment any of his blood went to his cock. The exhaustion and pain took away any potential need he might feel, anyway.

So Rain just was.

The only time he was something more, not just surviving but living, was when his aching fingers touched the sleek, shiny body of one of his basses. When his arms shook under its weight when he slung it over his shoulder. When he ran a finger over the thick strings. When he felt note after note vibrate through him.

It was what kept him sane.

He kept wondering for how much longer.

It was bad.

Three shows of the tour left. Rain didn’t think he’d make it. He was always doubtful, but this time it was the worst he’s ever been. He saw everyone around was worried, he wasn’t blind, even though they tried so very hard to not be obvious. They knew he wouldn’t listen or accept help, anyway.

He just had to focus, sleep as much as he could, eat well, stay hydrated, take painkillers and wear his braces and he’d be fine. He was a ghoul, for Satan’s sake, a literal demon, he wasn’t going to just– just fail. He was not failing anyone, even himself.

Rain didn’t help with unloading the gear or soundcheck this time. Not on purpose, he always helped, he was just asleep the whole day and no one woke him up. They did so just in time to eat something and get in costume for the show. The water ghoul would love to have helped, despite all, but his body was certainly grateful for just that little less work.

The show started out as usual, without much struggle, probably due to adrenaline, which—no matter how many times someone would play in front of thousands—never left. Rain started zoning out and trusting his muscle memory by the third song. Which one even was it?

He remembers tripping—nothing new—and maybe he even fell over once. Or twice?

Someone had to gently push the water ghoul in the general direction of his tech when the show ended and he didn’t notice. The bass was taken away from him and he was dragged around some more. He was so dizzy, he couldn’t really see, he realized then.

Rain couldn’t bend down for the bows, he’d pass right out. His back also wouldn’t like it much. He felt Cirrus and Papa gripping his hands for dear life but he couldn’t focus enough to squeeze them in return. He didn’t know if it was him swaying or if the stage was moving. Probably the former, he couldn’t see much and it wasn’t because of the mask. Maybe he was shaking, too? Most likely.

He nearly cried out when Papa and Cirrus let go of his hands. He knew he had to move, he couldn't just stay there standing in the middle of the stage like a deer caught in the headlights.

Rain tried, he directed all and any energy towards his legs and willed them to just work. He managed to take two impressively wobbly steps before someone—Swiss, his brain provided—wrapped an arm around his waist and took the majority of the water ghoul’s weight onto himself.

“I’ve got you,” Swiss whispered, and Rain tried his best to cling to his body as tightly as he clung to those words. He didn’t really register their way to the backstage area, having to focus on not collapsing. At least not yet. He nearly forgot about his back and hip and knee and ankle and–

“Can you stay here for a second? Just a second, I promise,” the multi ghoul asked him and he, somehow, nodded and Swiss let go of him before sprinting away, yelling something to someone. Rain could feel his eyes stinging and cold tears trailing down his cheeks and soaking into the balaclava. He tried to keep on his feet, he really did, Swiss promised he’d be back in a second, he could make it, but– he didn’t.

The water ghoul ran out of breath. He thought he saw Swiss running back in his direction but he couldn’t be sure, it was getting darker and darker all around. Was someone messing with the lights?

“Rain, shit– Phantom! Mountain! Move your asses someone!” Rain thought Swiss was yelling, but he couldn’t be, it was too quiet, muffled. When did he… when did he end up on the floor? Was Swiss holding him? His back hurt a lot now, legs too.

“I’ve got you, princess,” the multi ghoul muttered. Rain opened his mouth to reply, to tell him I know you do, but nothing came out.

He knew that was it, that was The Fail.

His eyes closed, and he floated away.

Rain was done.

Dewdrop got to them first, of course. He must’ve felt something was very wrong with Rain through their bond. “What the fuck happened!?”

“He just– he fucking passed out, I’ve no idea!” Swiss was panicking. Truly a rare thing for him but the way Rain looked, the way he felt, the way he lay there limp in his arms terrified the multi ghoul. Rain has had his fair share of fainting spells and multitude of accidents, but this was different, and both Swiss and Dewdrop could see it.

“Give him to me,” the fire ghoul growled, throwing himself onto his knees, but the anger in his voice was not directed at Swiss. He carefully moved Rain so the other could hold him. He knew Dewdrop needed it to not freak out himself. “Help me with the mask.”

The multi ghoul obliged, taking it off with shaky hands, as well as the balaclava. His lips curved in a frown when he saw how pale Rain’s face was, how sunken his cheeks were.

“Get Phantom,” Dewdrop ordered. “Or find a medic or something, I don’t know, just– just get help.”

Swiss turned on his heel, ready to bolt and get someone. As he did he could hear Dewdrop mumbling to himself, voice shaking, and the multi ghoul’s heart squeezed painfully. “I don’t– I don’t know what to do, Angelfish, fuck…”

Rain came back to reality slowly. First he registered the warmth all around him, but not the uncomfortable, overheating warmth. No, it was cozy and safe and it felt like–

“Dew?” he mumbled, trying to look around but his sight was, somehow, still not back fully. The warmth tightened around him—arms—and he felt and heard a purr from behind him.

“I’m here,” Dewdrop said, and indeed he was, laying with Rain between his legs, his back to the fire ghoul’s chest. Rain hummed and tried to twist so he could nuzzle into his partner, but the slight movement immediately caused a wave of pain to wash over his lower body and a whine to leave his lips. “Don’t move, shhh.”

“Wh– what happened?” the water ghoul asked quietly and tried not to wince as Dewdrop was the one to move and adjust so Rain could see him. 

“Well,” he sighed, “you were exhausted and sore well before tonight’s show. Then you fell over during the ritual. Twice. I guess that’s what made your legs and back so bad. At the end you passed out. For a few hours, it’s three in the morning now.”

“Fuck,” was all Rain could manage to choke out. Tears began gathering in his eyes, and Dewdrop, still carefully, scooted closer so the other could bury his face in his chest and hold onto him. “I– I’m sorry, we have two shows left, but I– I can’t, I hate it, I’m s– sorry.”

“Shhh, don’t apologize, don’t you dare,” Dewdrop cut him off and cupped the back of his head, bringing him closer.

“B– but the tour, Papa–”

“Papa is not angry. No one is,” the fire ghoul didn’t and wouldn’t let him babble about something everyone but Rain found absolute bullshit. “If anything, we’re all disappointed you haven’t said anything about how bad it was.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think–”

“We’re not disappointed that you don’t trust us enough, I know that’s not the case. We hate to see you in pain, that’s it.

“I’m so–”

“Stop,” Dewdrop spat, but there was no venom in it. Quite the opposite, his voice nearly cracked and Rain thought he felt his heart cracking with it. He should’ve told them, asked for help. Now he made his lover upset and he was just a fuck up, he should–

“Stop,” the fire ghoul repeated. Rain took a deep breath, trying so hard to not burst into tears like a child. It was his own fault, he had no right to complain or feel bad about it.

He cleared his throat and whispered, “Where even are we?”

“In the girls’ nest,” Dewdrop told him. “Back of the bus.”

“What about them?”

“You need it more now.” He shrugged and another wave of guilt washed over Rain. The ghoulettes always slept together and the bunks didn’t allow that, so they had the nest. He’s taken it away from them. “They offered, they don't mind.”

“What about the rituals?”

“Playback. We’ve got recordings for everything, you know that.” He did know it, but he also knew it was nothing like live playing. The fans would be disappointed, he knew they loved each and every one of them. He remembers what happened when Sunshine and Aether didn’t show up when everyone had expected them, when everyone was excited to see them among the rest. Now, after a few years without any changes, the fans expected all of them and Rain knew he might be a favorite for many of them. He’d disappoint thousands.

“Stop thinking, Angelfish,” Dewdrop said. His voice was stern but not angry. If anything, it had a wet tone to it, as if the fire ghoul was on the verge of tears, too.

It took a few moments of silence, interrupted only by Rain’s sniffles, Dewdrop’s purr and the bus’ rumble, for the water ghoul to compose himself a bit and speak again, “Everything hurts.”

“Oh… I know, love.” Dewdrop was sure he could hear his own heart breaking. “I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t– I can’t even say what’s messed up, ‘cause it feels like… everything.”

“As far as I'm aware, after Phantom’s rough evaluation when you were passed out on the green room’s floor,” the fire ghoul sighed, “one of your hips is dislocated, I think one knee, too, and possibly an ankle, plus one wrist from you falling on it. You also most likely slipped a disc and something’s up with your ribs.”

“Oh.”

“Maybe it feel like everything because–”

“It is everything,” Rain sobbed. “I’m fucking done, completely broken, D– Dew, I– I can’t…”

“Shhh, Rain, breathe,” Dewdrop’s voice was shaking, for once he sounded out of place and Rain hated himself so much for it. He tried to do as he said, but it was so hard, everything hurt and he was suffocating under an avalanche of thoughts that he couldn’t stop. “Breathe, Angelfish, breathe with me.”

“D– Dew, I’m– I’m scared,” he cried out and he could feel Dewdrop’s own tears dripping down onto his face before the last word even left his mouth.

The last two shows of the tour Rain spent on the bus sleeping. He could’ve been backstage, but he didn’t think he’d be able to bear listening to everything and not… not being there. Alone on the bus he could’ve at least cried his eyes out in peace, until he’d gotten a headache so intense from it he’d passed out. Two days in a row. 

Then it ended, officially, and the next two days were a blur of traveling by bus, by plane and then by bus again, until the noise of wheels over a smooth asphalt turned into a crunch of them over the Abbey’s gravel. Rain pretended he was asleep, let Swiss believe he was waking him up when they got back home and let himself be carried away to his room. They carried him around a lot lately, most of it against his will. He refused to use crutches, so they started to just hoist him up like a child, not caring about his protests. He didn’t have the strength to physically fight it, so he ended up just limply hanging off of whoever pulled the shortest straw.

Now, the water ghoul was carried out to his room, where he spent the night alone, cold, in pain and miserable. He hasn't slept alone in ages.

Rain didn’t know what time it was when he woke up, but it wasn’t particularly important anyway. It’s not like he had any plans and that made him angry.

He found himself not… scared, or sad, anymore. No, he felt so much rage, he felt like he was burning with it. He hated himself, he hated the world, the Clergy, Lucifer, his pack, Dewdrop. For what?

How could he?

The realization of how awful he was hit him like a freight train and bile rose in his throat. Rain closed his eyes again and hoped the sleep would return to him, so that he didn’t have to face the reality he’s found himself in just yet.

When he was roused from sleep again it was by a warm hand on his bare shoulder, making him gasp softly. “Rainy?”

“Mhm… Droplet? W’time is it?”

“Seven. In the evening,” Dewdrop mumbled, as if he wasn’t too proud of Rain’s achievement in sleeping for around twenty hours. Maybe it would be an achievement if he wouldn't be a water ghoul who can turn off his need to piss for when he sleeps. “Aren’t you hungry? Or dehydrated?”

“No,” Rain told him, simply, and yawned. He was annoyed.

“Still tired?”

“Mhm,” he hummed and snuggled further into his—somehow still cold—sheets. His eyes fluttered close and Rain hoped it would be a message clear enough for Dewdrop to leave him, but the fire ghoul seemed to have different plans. Rain heard him sigh and then felt the mattress next to him dip. He couldn’t have really prepared for the warm body suddenly glued to his side.

“What’r you doin’?” he barely held a growl back when Dewdrop started cuddling in even closer under his arm. Why did Rain feel like… like this? Dewdrop didn’t do anything wrong. Quite the opposite, he was doing his best to help, he didn’t deserve even a playful snarl to be thrown in his direction. If anything, it was Dewdrop who had the right to be bitter, aggressive and angry, not Rain. The fire ghoul went through things so much worse and he didn't act like a royal asshole about it. Not anymore, not towards his packmates. 

And Rain? He was bitching around for nothing.

Where did that sudden rage come from? He felt like he despised Dewdrop but… no– no, he loved him. When did he manage to lose that sense of himself?

“Sleeping,” the fire ghoul answered, and Rain didn’t dare open his mouth again, lest he hurt his lover worse than he already did, not even realizing it. He swallowed it down and this time his eyes had to be forced to close, his body had to be forced to relax and sleep had to be begged to take him. Rain didn’t sleep well that night.

In the morning he was the first to wake up, too. He spent the next five or fifty minutes staring down at the ghoul in his arms. That beautiful, kind, pure creature that didn’t deserve any hatred and maltreatment he experienced over the years. The man that Rain gave his heart and soul up for, and begged him to let him do so. The one the water ghoul loved more than anything, both Topside and in the Pits, in his immortal life.

And yet…

And yet Rain couldn’t wait for Dewdrop to wake up, get up and leave.

No, he didn’t want him to leave, that was… it was his worst nightmare. He never wanted to be alone, he was afraid of being alone, of being left behind and forgotten, of not being touched, of not being loved, what–

What the fuck was wrong with him?

Rain wasn’t sure how long it took for Dewdrop to wake up. Wasn’t sure how long he spent drowning in thoughts that weren’t his own. What would they be doing in his head, then?

The fire ghoul got up and left—finally, Rain’s mind provided—claiming it was going to be a busy day for him. Something about post-tour gear maintenance and paperwork related to it. Dewdrop proposed he’d find someone to keep Rain company, but the water ghoul insisted he was fine on his own. It was possibly the biggest lie that had ever escaped his mouth, but Dewdrop left it alone. Left Rain alone.

He promised he’d be back by the end of the day, that he’d come back to spend the night with Rain again. In his mind he both begged Dewdrop to fulfill that promise and to never come near him again.

He wanted to be alone, but the moment the fire ghoul closed the door behind him Rain whimpered and if he had at least a fraction of strength in him, he’d throw himself onto the floor and crawl after Dewdrop and beg him not to leave.

He didn’t, so there Rain was, submerging bit by bit in an ocean of thoughts that he desperately wanted to not be his, to not come true. Why couldn’t he swim?

Another day. 

Rain woke up alone and cold. Dewdrop didn’t come back.

His heart hurt, but he couldn’t blame him. He must’ve felt the negativity pouring off of Rain in waves, he must’ve known what was going through his head, he must’ve seen the change in how he held him.

The water ghoul didn’t know the time again. The curtains in his windows were shut, he couldn’t really estimate. It was probably more of an afternoon than a morning, but he didn’t care. He found himself not caring about a lot of things nowadays.

He opened his eyes with a sigh and tried his best to turn over onto his other side without causing himself any pain. He managed relatively well, only groaning a bit, but something set in the corner of his room, that wasn’t there before and wasn’t supposed to be there, caught his eye. A growl rose in his throat as Rain grabbed his phone and furiously found Swiss’ nickname in his contacts.

“Morning, Sleeping Beauty, you need anything?” the multi ghoul’s disgustingly sweet voice sounded from the speaker after a few seconds.

“Come here,” Rain snarled and hung up.

He knew Swiss would burst through the door in seconds, scared he might need help. In the short meantime the water ghoul threw his legs over the edge of the bed and got up. He padded over to that offending thing, and leaned against his desk next to it, glaring at it with gaze so fiery it could rival Dewdrop’s own.

“What’s wrong?” Swiss all but ran into the room, not being too careful about the door. He paused in the middle of it, taking in Rain’s fury.

“What the fuck is that?” he spat.

“It’s… uhm, it’s a wheelchair.”

“I can fucking see that!” the water ghoul shouted. Did Swiss think he was stupid? Did he think it was funny? “What is it doing here?”

“I brought it down from the infirmary.” He shrugged, brows furrowed at Rain’s raised voice. So he was right, it was his brilliant idea. “Can be useful.”

Silence fell for a moment, and Swiss thought Rain was thinking it through, that he was trying to be reasonable. But then he lifted his head and the multi ghoul felt like he was about to drown in the depth of anguish in Rain’s eyes. “Get it out.”

“What?”

“Get it out!” he blew up, spit flying from his mouth and tears clinging to his lashes. Before Swiss could make a move to do as he said, Rain snarled and turned to kick the wheelchair. It turned over a few times before ending up on the other side of the room, the multi ghoul’s eyes following it, but his head snapped back to Rain when he heard a thud and a painful moan from him. He put too much weight onto his bad leg when kicking that damned thing and nearly folded in on himself as he went down to the floor.

“Raincloud, Lord Below…” Swiss gasped, coming closer to help the other, but another growl—this time obviously being supposed to be threatening—escaped Rain’s mouth, curved into a pained frown.

“Don’t!” he yelled again. “Don’t fucking touch me, just– just get out.”

“Rain, I don’t–” Swiss tried, reaching a hand out. It hurt him so much, seeing Rain in pain, seeing him so– so miserable and broken. He’d never wished anything in his life as bad as to be able to take it all away from the water ghoul.

“I SAID GET OUT!” Rain still tried to sound relatively collected, act like it was only rage that was consuming him, nothing else. It was a fool's errand, of course, especially in front of Swiss. He could see right through him.

“Do you want Dew?” the multi ghoul asked quietly, not looking at Rain anymore. He let out a pained whimper, as if Swiss had just put a knife through his heart. He took it as a no.

The multi ghoul didn’t see a point in upsetting Rain any further. He nodded—pity pouring off of him—and turned on his heel to leave, shutting the door behind him. Leaving the flipped over wheelchair in the corner of the room.

Only when Rain couldn’t hear Swiss’ footsteps in the distance anymore did he break, tears flowing down his cheeks like waterfalls as he choked on them sobbing, curled up on the floor.

He cried and cried, sickeningly reveling in the pain increasing and enveloping him and the anger swallowing him up, until all he could do was stare at the scratched and dirty hardwood and desperately gasp for breath like a fish pulled out of water. In a way he was, and he began daydreaming about sinking to the bottom of the lake and never coming up again.

He’d miss the music and his pack but… would they miss him?

Dewdrop was spending most of the week following their return from tour busying himself with chores, sleeping with anyone but Rain and crying. Usually into Swiss’ or Mountain’s shoulder.

He didn’t know what to do and he hated it. He hated seeing his partner in pain so much he stopped going to see him at all after two days. He just couldn’t bear it.

What he couldn’t bear even more, though, was the glint in Rain’s eyes and the tension in his body that told Dewdrop he hated him now. He tried so hard to not blame the water ghoul for it—for anything—to understand, to let him feel whatever it was that he was suffocating under in peace… but Dewdrop was always self-conscious, contrary to a popular belief.

He was terrified.

Terrified of Rain leaving him, of becoming a stranger to the man he loved above anything else in the universe. That’s what would kill Dewdrop.

Aether told him it would never happen, that it was physically impossible. He said he saw and felt the bond between Rain and Dewdrop and that it was something unbreakable, even if Lucifer Himself decided to try. He said the water ghoul would come around when his denial and anger would slowly turn to depression, then bargaining and finally to acceptance. Aether told Dewdrop that Rain loved and needed him, even if not right then.

“I need him, too, Aether,” the fire ghoul had said, and left. Aether seemed to not understand, even though he was supposed to be the one who understood everything. It all seemed… fake to Dewdrop.

He promised himself he’d never hate Rain. That no matter what he would do, what would happen, no matter how hard it would be, Dewdrop would be there. He would wait, even if it meant waiting till the damned end of the world. He would wait.

Another day—how many has it been?—of Dewdrop crawling into Swiss’ bed with his body, mind and heart all exhausted. The multi ghoul welcomed him with open arms again, crushing him to his chest, and let him whimper quietly.

“I miss him, Swiss.”

Even though Rain was right there, just behind a wall. Somehow that made it all worse. The fact that he was so close, yet never farther.

“I know, kitten,” Swiss sighed. “I do, too. But it’ll be alright.”

“I– I don’t know what to do.” Even though Dewdrop was saying those words over and over again, like a prayer, over the last few days, he couldn’t seem to get rid of his guilt. He was supposed to be there for Rain no matter what and what was he doing? Hiding in other’s arms because of his fragile feelings when his partner was in pain and alone.

“It’ll be alright,” the multi ghoul whispered, as every time before that. There was nothing else to say.

Then, as usual, after some time, some more whines and some tears Dewdrop fell asleep, Swiss following shortly. Dewdrop loved Swiss and Swiss loved him, they always slept well together, but those nights they both seemed to not get any real rest. Weighted down by the feeling of their lover, their friend, their family rotting.

When they woke up in the morning—Dewdrop first—they talked again. The fire ghoul always got ideas overnight, something he put all the remaining scraps of hope into, and shared them with Swiss, hoping for approval.

“You’re killing yourself over him, you know that?” he usually said instead.

And Dewdrop thought, what if this time it’s a good idea? This time he was sure, actually.

“Swiss, what if– I was planning something and maybe…” he trailed off, tracing his fingertips over the expanse of Swiss’ stomach, “maybe I should do it now, maybe it’d make him understand that I’m here. That I’m… you know, not going anywhere?”

“Let’s hear it,” the multi ghoul said, but there was a tinge of hesitation in his voice already.

“We’re together, technically, but what if… he always wanted to… to do something more human, you know? I planned it, but I’m a fucking coward and…”

Swiss floated away for a moment, not really listening to what Dewdrop was saying anymore. He knew what the plan was, it wasn’t the first time it was mentioned to him. He wasn’t sure it would work. Besides, how was anything supposed to work? What did that even mean? Maybe Dewdrop was right, maybe he should do it. Rain would cause—was causing—a lot of harm but there’s no way he would hurt Dewdrop that bad, if he… no, he wouldn’t, no matter what.

“...could go and–”

“Do it.”

“W– what?” the fire ghoul sputtered. “You like the idea?”

“I’m not sure,” Swiss sighed, nuzzling his face down into Dewdrop’s hair, “but I’m not sure about anything Rain-related right now, and this seems like something that could finally… snap him out of it.”

“Promise me you’re serious,” Dewdrop quietly begged into his neck. 

“I just– I just don’t think we can come up with anything better, kitten. We gotta get him back.”

“We gotta get him back,” the fire ghoul agreed. “We gotta get him back.”

Dewdrop didn’t think he had ever been as nervous as now. He wasn’t just nervous, it wasn’t anxiety, it wasn’t stage fright. He was terrified that it wouldn’t change anything. He was terrified that it wouldn’t fix anything.

Still, he was not giving up.

He wanted to do it immediately. The fire ghoul parted with Swiss and ran to his own bedroom to prepare. As much as possible, at least. It wasn’t something one could really prepare for.

Dewdrop took a shower—boiling hot—got dressed in something that wasn’t a stretched out or stolen band t-shirt and bent down by his wardrobe to fish the most important part out. His hands were shaking, and he cursed himself out under his breath.

The fire ghoul shoved it into his pocket and stormed out of his room. Before he blinked he was already by Rain’s and he suddenly lost all the remaining scraps of courage he had. 

It was a stupid idea, Rain didn’t need that now, he’d be annoyed, it wouldn’t work, it was a bad moment, he should just–

“I can hear you breathing over there,” the water ghoul’s muffled voice came from behind the door. Dewdrop flinched, cold sweat dripping down the back of his neck.

“C– Can I come in?” he asked, trying to hide the shake in his voice.

“Sure.” He cleared his throat, wiped his hands on his pants and grabbed the handle. Dewdrop slipped inside and nearly stumbled backwards as he got hit with a stench of… pain. Mental and physical anguish were hanging thick in the air and tears suddenly gathering in the fire ghoul’s eyes wasn’t just his body’s defensive response.

There was a mess on the floor, everything one could think of thrown all around the room. Curtains were half shut, barely letting any light inside. Rain was in his bed, sheets crumpled over the lower half of his body as he fidgeted with his own fingers and avoided looking at his partner.

“Rainy, do you–”

“It’s alright,” the water ghoul didn’t let him finish, glancing up briefly as he tried to muster up a reassuring smile. Dewdrop had never seen a thing so fake. “What did you need?”

He managed to forget what he came there for when he took in the ruin Rain was in. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. The other wasn’t looking at him and Dewdrop felt as out of place as ever.

“Dew?” Rain said quietly again. The fire ghoul cleared his throat and squeezed his eyelids to banish away the tears of fear.

“Yeah, I’m here,” he whispered and put a hand back into his pocket, fingers wrapping around the item put away in there. “I have a… question for you.” Rain hummed in acknowledgement.

Dewdrop took a shaky step forward, kicking away a crumpled water bottle to make space, and took one last deep breath.

He lowered himself to the floor, kneeling.

Only then did Rain look at him again, “Droplet, what are you–”

“You always talked about how you love human traditions,” the fire ghoul’s voice was quiet but wobbly, as if he was to burst into tears any second. He just might, really. “That you think they’re cute and… and I know it’s not the same with ghouls, but–”

He paused. Rain was looking at him with his brows raised and his expression unreadable. It made Dewdrop even more terrified but he wouldn’t stop now. He pulled out the little box from his pocket. “Rain, I want to marry you. Like a human. Will you? Will you marry me? Will you be my mate?”

The water ghoul’s lips parted, mouth hanging open in shock. And something else. He stammered, eyes wide, “D– Dew, wh– what?”

“I know it’s stupid and cheesy, but I don’t care. Rain, I need you, I love you more than anything, you know that.” It was silent for a few moments and Dewdrop had never felt time go as slow as it did then. His face was burning and his heart was racing so fast he felt it shake his entire body.

Finally, Rain broke the silence, but with… with a scoff. “Really? You’re so desperate to cheer me up, or whatever, that you’re, what, proposing?”

Dewdrop’s ears started ringing, there was suddenly a crushing pressure on his chest and a sting in his eyes. Physical pain all over. He was sure the world was starting to crumble under him. “W– what? No– no, of course it's not like that, Rain–”

“Yeah…” he sighed. “You just suddenly got a dream of being mated to a cripple, sure.”

“Rainy, p– please, don’t–” the fire ghoul was crying now, fat and hot tears running down his cheeks.

“Oh, maybe it’s a charity kinda thing? That’d be fun.”

Dewdrop let out a choked out sob and scrambled to get up, dropping the ring under the bed in the process. Not like it would be needed now, would it?

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, throwing himself at the door and pulling it open. He paused, just for a second before he ran out and slammed it shut. “I planned it for months.”

The silence that suddenly surrounded Rain again was soul crushing. 

What the fuck did he just do?

Rain had no idea what happened to Dewdrop after he… left. He couldn’t feel anything, couldn’t hear anything, nobody came to talk to him. About this or anything else. 

He dared to check his phone, this one time. All he found was a single text message from Swiss. Rain wasn’t hoping to find any words of consolation or assurance, he wasn’t that delusional. He found exactly what he expected.

man I know you’re in pain and all, but you fucked up

He knew he did. The worst he ever has, no doubt. He wished someone would come and yell at him—maybe beat him up, if he was lucky—but that would be mercy he didn’t deserve. What he was doing to himself was worse, anyway.

Rain didn’t think there was any coming back from this.

How could he? He didn’t mean any of it. He knew Dewdrop loved—used to love?—him, they talked about this months ago. He knew what the fire ghoul did was genuine, brought up by nothing but the sickening amounts of love he was harboring for Rain in his broken little heart.

If he knew all that… why did he do what he did?

What the fuck was wrong with him?

Everything was the simplest answer. The truth.

There was nothing to be done about it apart from rotting in pain, the misery of loneliness he sentenced himself to on his own and the self hatred for doing so. 

It appeared Rain couldn’t cry anymore. He had neither the tears nor the energy. How low he must have fallen, how far away from who he was, that even his beloved water decided to turn her back on him.

So he lay there on the floor surrounded by thrash—he supposed he was fitting in—staring at the cracked ceiling with unseeing eyes, as if his empty gaze could fill the cracks in the ceiling and the hearts of his packmates at the same time.

It could’ve been minutes, it could’ve been days. The physical pain was nothing anymore, compared to the self inflicted mental anguish. The dull and somehow simultaneously sharp ache that was spreading in waves through his broken body was rewarding, in a way. Punishing, Rain supposed. He deserved every bad thing that has ever happened to him and that would be to happen to him for just this one horrible mistake.

He didn’t deserve the respite of sleep. When he felt it finally taking him, all he could do was pray to Lucifer to not let him rest.

His prayers weren’t answered. Of course, why would Lucifer side with him? He hurt Dewdrop, the one He had protected so fiercely all his life, the favored one. Rightfully so. Dewdrop deserved the world and Rain did not deserve to be even a grain of sand under the fire ghoul’s feet in that world.

He woke up with a start and a splitting headache to a harsh knocking on his door. It wasn’t asking, it was– “I’m coming in.”

Rain let out a grunt, but made no effort to move from his spot on the dirty floor. Swiss’ scent hit him as the multi ghoul loomed over him. It was a mixture of sadness, anger and… grief, Rain thought. What would he be grieving?

“I brought snacks,” Swiss announced and Rain heard something being dropped onto his bedside table. “I don’t care what excuses you’re cooking up in that head of yours, I’m coming back tomorrow and I better find them eaten.”

With that he turned around on his heel and returned to the door. He paused, though, and the water ghoul heard a sigh.

“He’s not really angry at you, you know?” Swiss said. Silence answered him. “I think it’s physically impossible to be angry at you, he’s just… you know how hard vulnerability is for him. He was planning it for quite some time mostly because he was nervous, and then he finally managed to do it and, well… you know what happened. He just needs a little space. He’ll come back, and he’ll come back soon, because that dumbass can’t live without you. You better be ready when he does. I’ll kick your ass myself if you won’t.”

Rain stayed quiet, trying to not let his mind hang onto Swiss’ words. He failed.

He heard the door opening, but before it was shut the multi ghoul spoke again, “Now get yourself the fuck together.”

Rain expected a deafening silence once Swiss left. Instead all he could hear was the pounding of rain outside, the noise of it pattering against the window. Rain scoffed at the irony of his namesake falling down just as he was falling apart.

He thought maybe he should reunite with it, let it soak into his dehydrated skin and make him feel like himself again. Even if just for a moment.

Rain groaned with pain, sinking his claws into the hardwood floor and rolling around. He bent his arms under his body and pushed himself up. His heart raced, head spun, but soon he was standing.

Swiss was right. Dewdrop would come back, he was too stubborn not too, and the least Rain could do was not hurt him any more than he already did.

He limped to the door, gritting his teeth against the pain radiating mostly from his hip, but hesitated with his hand over the handle. Maybe he should… 

The water ghoul looked over his shoulder at his desk where a cane was laying, already covered in dust. He bit his lip so hard he drew blood.

Rain turned around.

“That’s an interesting choice of weather to finally go out,” Rain heard a familiar voice from behind him.

“Well, uhm… a bit ironic, too,” the water ghoul muttered as he turned around, coming face to face with the other. He hasn't seen them in ages.

“You could say so,” Zephyr shrugged. “I’d say it can be symbolic.”

“I need it,” Rain sighed, feeling tears welling up in his eyes. He gripped his cane’s handle tighter, eyeing the other’s own.

“I understand. Good luck.” The air ghoul winked and took a step to the side, intending to go on about their day.

“Zephyr, how…” Rain took a deep breath. “How did you survive? How are you surviving?”

“I’ve got my pack,” they answered with a soft smile painted on their face. They looked happy. “When I really think about it, they’re all I truly need.”

Dewdrop felt his heart clench when he caught sight of Rain outside through the common room’s window. He wanted to smile and cry and scream, overwhelmed with all the emotions known to man. He couldn’t have known if Rain being out there, in the rain, meant anything, but he didn’t care. Limping through the garden with a cane clutched in one of his hands, Rain was out there.

Dewdrop stormed out of the den, running out into the downpour with no care in the world apart from his ghoul. He ran until he was just behind him, pausing with a heaving chest as the world rumbled all around. “Rainy?”

The fire ghoul could see the deep breath he took when he turned around. Dewdrop didn’t even get a chance to blink before Rain was on him, cold nose pressing into his neck, arms wrapped tightly all around the smaller ghoul.

“I’m sorry,” he sobbed.

“Don’t have to be,” Dewdrop sighed, bringing him even closer. “Don’t have to be.”

Rain truly wailed at that. His knees buckled but the fire ghoul held him up, and it meant more than a thousand words. He’d always hold him up, wouldn’t let him fall. They both knew that.

“F– forgive me… please.”

“I already did, Angelfish,” he said and there was no hesitation in his voice.

“Can– can I… with you… stay with you t– tonight?”

The fire ghoul’s heart clenched tightly. He pressed a kiss to the top of Rain’s head. “Of course you can. Always.”

“But not yet,” he whispered, barely heard over the noise of rain. “Need it.”

“Yeah. Yeah, let’s stay here for a bit.”

So they did, clinging to each other and waiting for the sun to set as rain washed down over them.

When Rain started shivering Dewdrop carried him back inside and to his room, peppering kisses all over his wet face on the way, his heat kicked up to not risk the water ghoul catching a cold. He helped him dry himself and change. It was a quiet process, neither of them having words to spare. They didn’t need them anyway. Not yet, at least.

What they needed for now was each other, and they finally had it again. Rain didn’t protest when Dewdrop patted his bare chest in invitation once they were in his bed. The water ghoul scooted over and glued himself to the other, curling an arm around his waist. Tails and legs tangled together.

They both haven't slept as well as that night for what felt like ages.

A few days had passed since that evening in the rain. Dewdrop has not stepped away from Rain for a moment over those days, always by his side, touching. Support both mental and physical.

Not much changed, really. Barely anything. Rain was still hurting, plagued by the pain his body was subjected to and the one his hurt body caused his mind.

But he smiled again. He took care of himself more. Well, Dewdrop took care of him, mostly, but Rain let him. He wasn’t fighting anymore. It was a slight improval, but an improval nonetheless.

“What do you think about breakfast?” Dewdrop asked as they were laying in bed one morning, lounging lazily and drinking each other in. Rain had the fire ghoul tucked against his side, lithe fingers brushing softly through the golden strands. He was about to open his mouth to agree, but the other spoke again before he could, “With the others?”

While the two of them did come across one or a few of the others over the last couple of days, Rain still hasn’t really talked to anyone. He felt guilty and doubted he’d be able to handle them all at once. But maybe… with Dewdrop…

“I– I, uhm…” he mumbled.

“It’s okay, we don’t have to,” the fire ghoul quickly added. “Just a proposition. We can wait as long as you need to.”

“No, I…” Rain sighed and swallowed thickly. “I want to. I miss them.”

Dewdrop tilted his head, looking up at him with his brows furrowed. “Really? You sure? We don’t ha–”

“I’m sure,” he smiled, leaning down to press a kiss to the other’s forehead. “What time is it?”

The fire ghoul turned to take a look at his phone. “Nearly ten. I’ll text them we’ll be coming down, okay?”

“We should get going, then.” Rain started to gather himself up to crawl out of their nest. Once he did and the obligatory dizziness had passed, Dewdrop grabbed his hand, pulling him in between his legs where he sat at the edge of the bed.

“If you’ll feel overwhelmed or simply change your mind, just tell me and we’ll leave, okay? They’ll understand. I just don’t want you to stress out for no reason,” the fire ghoul said, drawing circles on Rain’s hand with his thumb.

“I’ll tell you,” he agreed and with a pull on his finger prompted Dewdrop to stand up and fall into his arms for a hug. He kissed the top of the smaller ghoul’s head before they parted to get dressed.

Soon, they were slowly walking down the corridor to the common room, hand in hand, and the closer they got the faster Rain’s heartbeat was. Still, Dewdrop held onto his hand with an iron grip and wasn’t planning on ever letting go.

“I love you,” he whispered into Rain’s ear as he got onto his tiptoes to kiss the water ghoul’s cheek.

“I love you, too,” he muttered back, just before they walked into the common room.

“Hi, Dew!” Phantom noticed them first, grinning as he realized Rain was there, too. “Hi, Rainy!”

At his, not very subtle, announcement, the rest of the ghouls turned their heads in the pair’s direction. Rain had his head hung and Dewdrop squeezed his hand reassuringly as they padded further into the room. Apart from the initial surprise—a positive one—on the pack’s faces, no fuss was created. They greeted Rain and Dewdrop normally and proceeded to go on about everything as if nothing had ever happened. The water ghoul was overwhelmed, but grateful for this small mercy of not being the center of attention.

Dewdrop kept a hand on his thigh at all times, additionally giving him a warm squeeze to his still aching hip or knee. Breakfast was uneventful, a true blessing. Everyone had their own quiet conversations going on with a giggle rising up over the voices from time to time. Rain kept quiet but he enjoyed the background noise of his pack. Of life.

At some point Phantom truly burst out laughing, nearly choking on his juice. Swiss patted him on the back as he grinned and tried to not laugh himself.

“What’s so funny?” Cumulus asked with her eyebrows raised and a soft smirk.

“Bug finally found the video,” Swiss sighed. A series of snorts sounded out around the table.

“What’s the video?” Aurora asked, the only one clueless as to what was so hilarious.

“The one where he–” Mountain started but Phantom cut him off with more booming laughter and wheezed out words.

“Where he falls off the fucking stage!” he all but yelled. “Like a fucking starfish!”

“Oh, I saw that one,” Aurora giggled.

“Everyone did,” Aether scoffed, returning to his food.

“I know it looked funny.” The multi ghoul folded his arms across his chest and pouted dramatically. “But it was very serious! I was bruised for two weeks!”

Rain felt something in his heart souring, but he focused on his toast and the comforting warmth radiating from Dewdrop.

“Oh, I bet.” Phantom put a hand over his heart, as dramatic as Swiss. “It must’ve been so scary!”

The water ghoul gritted his teeth as the rest of the table laughed at Phantom and Swiss’ little act. Rain tensed up, thousands of words slamming against his brain now. Why did it even set him off? It was nothing, it meant nothing, they were just joking it–

“You’re so brave, Swissy!” Phantom laughed and Rain snapped.

One moment the room was filled with laughter as he sat by the big table, the second it was dead silent as he limped away with a snarl on his lips and stinging tears in his eyes.

“Rain!” Dewdrop called after him. He was so stunned at the water ghoul’s outburst he didn’t follow him right away. “Angelfish, wait–”

He slammed his door shut and locked it as soon as he reached his room, right in Dewdrop’s face. He threw himself onto the bed and curled into a ball, hands pressing into his ears so hard it hurt, to not hear the fire ghoul’s muffled, hurt voice, pleading with him to open the door.

Not this time.

Dewdrop shuffled back to the common room after a few minutes, knowing that lingering at Rain’s door would do no good. He ran a hand down his face with a sigh. Back by the table Swiss was consoling a crying Phantom as the rest pointedly stared at their plates.

“It’s not your fault, Ant,” Dewdrop told him. It really wasn’t. “He’s in a fragile state now, but he knows it was just joking around and not even about him.”

“B– but I–” the quintessence ghoul sniffled.

Dewdrop forced himself to smile softly, reassuringly. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Okay?”

“Okay,” he mumbled and let himself be pulled closer by Swiss as he wiped off his tears. The tension in the room could be cut with a knife as the fire ghoul plopped down onto a couch. He wasn’t hungry anymore.

Dewdrop dropped his face into his hands and tried so hard to not just… break. He took a few shaky deep breaths trying to compose himself. He felt the couch dip next to him, then, and Aether’s scent enveloped him as the bigger ghoul wrapped himself around him.

“It’s okay, firefly,” he whispered. “You’ll be alright. Both of you.”

Oh, how bad Dewdrop wanted to believe it.

Rain didn’t sleep well without Dewdrop again. He kept tossing and turning for hours, and even after he did finally manage to fall asleep, he still woke up frequently. That’s why he heard the suspiciously quiet knock on his door in the morning. “‘s open.”

The door squeaked and Cumulus’ fluffy hair came into Rain’s view. “Hi, pearl.”

“Mhm,” he hummed in greeting, pulling the covers higher up over himself.

“How are you feeling?” The ghoulette came closer and closer until she sat at the edge of the bed. “Did you sleep well?”

“‘m fine,” Rain grumbled and shuffled away, not even trying to be discreet, when Cumulus’ hand hovered over his legs under the covers.

“Glad to hear,” she smiled, but the water ghoul wasn’t neither stupid nor blind. “Do you need anything? I can–”

“I said I’m fucking fine,” he growled, snapping his teeth. Cumulus flinched and quickly scrambled off of the bed. Rain could smell her scent souring in real time.

“Oh, uhm… I’m– I’m gonna go then… goodbye, Pearl,” she murmured and stumbled out of the door, still being careful and considerate enough to not slam it. Rain sighed, burying himself under the covers fully. She didn’t deserve it, there was really no reason for him to–

“No, you fucking don’t!” Cirrus yelled, out of nowhere. She, on the other hand, slammed the door so hard it was surprising the frame didn’t splinter. Before Rain could register what was happening the bedding was ripped off of him and it was his turn to flinch. “You’re either going to get yourself the fuck together or we’re going to leave you here to rot in your own misery.”

Her teeth were bared as she stood over him, fuming. “You’re in pain and depressed, we get it, but it’s not our fucking fault. It’s not yours either, but stop making it worse for yourself and us by being a little bitch.”

Cirrus was right, Rain knew she was. He was silent, but he hoped she’d rip him to shreds as she continued to growl and snarl. “Dewdrop didn’t do anything to deserve what you said to him, Phantom didn’t mean anything by what he said and you know it, Swiss was only trying to help because he cares for you.”

“Look at me,” she spat, kicking the bed frame. He couldn’t look her in the eyes, he was a filthy coward. “Cumulus was crying her eyes out feeling sorry for you at night and wanted to simply offer company in the morning. I understand everything, I really do, but that’s fucking enough, Rain.”

He felt like a child, being scolded as he fidgeted with his hands, no power to talk back. Cirrus was right, about everything. Rain hurt everyone, even though all they tried to do was help. He was a monster. He didn’t deserve to as much as live in the same building as his pack, those kind, caring and compassionate ghouls that were nothing like him, the miserable cripple poisoning everyone’s lives.

He’d do everyone a favor if he just… disappeared.

It could’ve been a day or a week again, as Rain continued his rotting. He didn’t have any will, energy or reason to do… anything, really. Once in a while he’d stumble to the bathroom to piss, but how often could that be happening if he didn’t drink anything? That was another thing, he was drying out, not only inside but outside, too. He was a water ghoul, for Satan’s sake.

Rain didn’t see a point anymore. He tried, he thought it was about to get better, he thought it was about to get fixed, he had Dewdrop again and he fucked it all up. Again. He didn’t deserve more chances.

Rain lost.

He flipped over on his bed, groaning at the pain shooting through his body at the movement after so long of being stuck in one position. The water ghouls stared at the ceiling, the moonlight dancing on the flat surface. He longed to feel the peace of it again.

It was cold when Rain woke up again. He didn’t think he had ever been so cold.

Something was wrong, he wasn’t– it wasn’t just cold in his room, he was freezing inside. Heart feeling like a block of ice.

His hands were shaking, his knees ached.

Rain noticed a bass laying next to him. How did it get there?

He tried to reach out for it with a whine, but he couldn’t… he couldn’t move. His body wasn’t listening to him. He was stuck.

“Please,” he whimpered, eyes stinging. He tried one more time.

His fingers twitched, then his wrist, but before he could grab the bass, it was gone. Vanished.

A shuddered sob left his throat and he brought his hand back to his chest, as if it got burned. Why did it… where did it go?

Rain got up, legs wobbly. Pain shot through his entire body, but he didn’t stop. He left his room, he wanted to find someone. He didn’t know why, he avoided them all, after all, but he suddenly needed them.

He walked slowly, holding onto the wall, wincing with every step, his jaw clenched. First door, Swiss’ bedroom. He knocked.

No answer.

Rain swallowed thickly and pressed down on the handle, opening the door with a squeak. He looked into the room but it… it was empty. Completely bare, no furniture, no belongings. No Swiss.

The water ghoul’s heart sank.

He closed the door and moved on to another one. Mountain.

The shaking of his hands was worse now, anxiety rising. Mountain’s room was empty, too. Rain’s heart was racing, fear engulfing him completely. Did they… leave him?

He limped from door to door, finding each and every bedroom in the same state of nakedness. The den has become a wasteland and Rain felt like he had slept right through it.

Tears were flowing down his face, his breathing was shallow and his head was pounding as he stumbled down to the common room. It was empty, too, but there was a piece of paper on the big dining table, covered in dust. Rain didn’t want to read it.

He did, though. He couldn’t not have.

You finally did it, you pushed us all away. 

Congratulations, Rain.

You are free.

Rain woke up with a cry on his lips, body covered in sweat.

Did he really wake up?

His body hurt all the same. He was alone all the same.

He supposed that was it. His nightmares finally came true and it was nothing he didn’t deserve. He truly did this to himself.

Rain lifted an arm to move his damp hair out of his face with a sigh. When he dropped it he hit something that was laying next to him on the bed. Something like paper. He grabbed it, brought to his face and tried to see what was on it, squinting in the half-dark room.

A pain sound left his mouth as his heart sank impossibly deeper when he made out the words in Papa’s clean handwriting.

Rain tumbled out of bed, his knees hitting the floor. He scrambled up and with tears adding to the wetness on his face ran out of his room with energy he wasn’t able to find in himself for the last… well, he still wasn’t sure how much time had really passed since the tour had ended.

But now he ran.

“Even you can’t convince him to give up touring,” Mountain sighed, running his fingers through Dewdrop’s hair where his head was resting on the other’s chest.

“I know, but Aether–” he sniffled.

“Aether wanted it, it was his idea,” the earth ghoul reminded him. This was the third—or thirteenth—time they were having this exact conversation. Mountain wasn’t annoyed or exasperated by it, no. He just wished he was able to tell Dewdrop something else. “Sunny, too. This is a very different situation, Fire Lily.”

“Fuck, I know, but I– I just can’t see him like this, but I know not playing will be equally bad, Mounty. If not worse. ”

“Yeah… yeah, it will,” he whispered. It was the truth, everyone knew it. Rain and his music was something… it was one. It couldn’t be separated, Rain without music was an empty shell, a ghost. He needed it to survive just as much as he needed water.

Silence that fell after that was soon interrupted by a single vibration of Mountain’s phone. He reached out for it and Dewdrop could hear and feel his heart speeding up under his ear.

“Oh… I– I don’t think any of us will have anything to say about it,” the earth ghoul said.

“What do you mean?” Dewdrop perked up, anxiety rising in him.

Mountain showed him his phone, the band’s group chat open. The single text message from Papa hanging over the bright background was like a knife piercing the skin of Dewdrop’s chest.

Good morning, my dear ghouls. I am sorry for not informing any of you in advance, but I thought it best, considering the… circumstances. I hope you can understand my decision. All of you, please come down to the summoning chamber as soon as you get this. We are about to summon a new ghoul.

“They’re about to summon a ghoul now?” a choked off whimper left Dewdrop’s throat. That would… it would kill Rain.

“Seems like Papa made a choice a while ago,” Mountain grumbled and pulled the shaking fire ghoul closer to his chest, neither of them ready to face the reality. They both hoped the messages that came soon in quick succession after the first wasn’t Papa hurrying them. It was worse.

dew 

my office

now

its rain

This made the fire ghoul scramble out of Mountain’s arms and throw himself out of the door without a word. The earth ghoul understood, he slowly climbed out himself and began to get ready. After all, the new ghoul would have to be welcomed no matter the state their pack was currently in.

Papa expected Rain to show signs of life as soon as he would wake up and see the note left on his bed. He knew it wasn’t likely for him to see the message on his phone. What the man didn’t quite expect was how he burst through his office’s door shaking and crying.

“Papa, please–” were his first words, let out in a breathless whine as the water ghoul stood in the door, clutching the handle for dear life. He looked like he was about to collapse. 

“I’m sorry, Rain,” Papa sighed, leaning back against the desk and trying to not make the pity show on his unpainted face. “I made my choice.”

“I’m fine, I just need to rest,” Rain pleaded, coming closer on wobbly legs. Papa reached out for him. “I can still tour, I won’t disappoint you any more.”

“You have never disappointed me, not once. I’m removing you from the project for your own good.”

A hurt noise left Rain’s mouth before his knees hit the ground. Before Papa could so much as blink the ghoul crawled over to him and wrapped himself around his legs, begging as if for his life. In a way he was.

“Please… Papa, don’t���” his voice was breaking, barely understandable, “don’t take this away from me.”

“I am sorry, my ghoul,” Papa said, meaning it. It was a hard decision for him, too, he knew how it would impact not only Rain himself but the entire pack, but he was the head of the church now. He was responsible for his ghouls. In the long run, this was the better choice. Lesser evil.

Papa lowered himself to the ground and wrapped his arms around Rain—still babbling out his pleas. He held on tight, letting the ghoul cry into his shoulder. Rain clung to the man as if he was a lifeline, the last remaining scraps of normality in his life.

Not letting his grip falter, Papa dug around for his phone. As clumsy as it was, he managed to send a few quick texts to the chat, hoping that the fire ghoul would be bothered enough to open them and come as soon as possible.

How could’ve he doubted him?

“Rain,” Papa whispered into his ear after what felt like hours. “Dewdrop’s here.”

The water ghoul’s head shot up so quickly he nearly gave himself whiplash. Through the tear-blurred vision he saw Dewdrop’s silhouette as he stood over the two of them.

“Angelfish,” he sighed and before anything else could leave his lips, Rain threw himself at his feet, wrapping weak arms around his calves and clinging hard as he cried into the fabric of his jeans. 

Dewdrop knelt—rather clumsily with how the other was holding him—and buried his fingers in Rain’s hair, bringing him close to his chest. He turned to Papa for a moment, gently asking him for space and the man left with a compassionate smile on his face, closing the door behind him.

“Rain… Rain, look at me. I’m here. I’ve got you, it’s okay.”

“You– you’ll go away, you’ll l– leave me,” Rain sobbed, clinging to Dewdrop’s shirt with white-knuckled grip, as if he’d really leave if he let go even for a split second.

“Angelfish, I won’t, ever,” the fire ghoul tried but Rain was so far away, spiraling so hard that nothing was getting through to him. Dewdrop was shaking now, too, Rain’s pain and sadness choking him like they’d be his own. Worse. “Please, Rainy, stay with me, I’m not going to leave, I’m not going anywhere.”

“D–  Droplet, I– I can’t–” his breathing was nothing but short, choked off gulps of air that he greedily swallowed but spat back out with another wave of tears after a second. Dewdrop frowned, the sound going straight to his bruised and cracked heart.

“Rainy, breathe. Please, breathe for me, please,” he begged him, on the verge of tears himself. He couldn’t cry, there was no point, he just had to– he just had to help Rain. “Please, baby.”

“I– I can’t… can’t D– Dew,” he wheezed out and it made panic flash through Dewdrop. It was too empty, he was… he sounded like he was suffocating and the fire ghoul could do nothing about it. “Dew, I– I’m s– scared.”

“I know, baby, it’s okay, it’ll be alright. Just breathe, please, Rainy.”

“Can’t…” Rain whispered without air, so quiet Dewdrop could barely hear it.

The water ghoul went limp in his arms, fingers letting go of his shirt, head thumping against his collarbone.

“Fuck, fuck, R– Rainy?” Dewdrop’s tears fell as panic rose in his throat like bile. “Rainy, please, wake up. H– hey, hey, Rainy, wake the fuck up, please, I’m begging you. Please…”

But Rain couldn’t hear him.

Rain came to surrounded by warmth. Nothing overwhelming and nothing… dry. He was in the water. He felt his limbs twitch, his chest slowly rise and fall.

“Hi, fish boy,” he heard a whisper and felt a breath on his ear. His brain was slowly catching on, registering his surroundings. Rain was in a bath. Dewdrop was with him, holding the water ghoul between his legs, against his chest. Chin hooked over his shoulder.

Rain tensed, breath hitching, but Dewdrop only tightened his arms around him. “Hey, it’s okay. I’ll look after you, it’s okay.”

No, no, he didn’t deserve it. He couldn’t take it.

“Rain, stop,” the fire ghoul sighed as if he knew exactly what he was thinking. He must have had. “It’s not true. I love you, let me take care of you.”

“D– don’t. Don’t say that.”

“Rainy… you’re such an idiot,” Dewdrop chuckled. It threw Rain off so much he stopped squirming, mouth nearly agape.

“W– what?”

“Just… just stop fighting everything, okay? It’ll be alright, just stop fighting. Please.”

Rain didn’t know how to answer, but after all the hurt he had caused Dewdrop, the least he could do was to obey. So he did.

“That’s it,” the fire ghoul hummed. “I’ve got you. Relax.”

Rain took a deep breath, letting his eyes fall shut, and tried to follow the simple instruction. He’d be able to if he’d just stop thinking. His thoughts were racing.

“It’s okay, you’re safe,” Dewdrop murmured, a wave of comforting warmth washing over Rain. He wasn’t sure if it was the fire ghoul’s warmth or just his words. They were like sedatives for him.

“Can you…” he cleared his throat, “please, Droplet, keep talking.”

“Of course, baby.” The water ghoul could hear the soft smile in his voice as Dewdrop traced his warm fingers over the skin of Rain’s stomach under the water. “My pretty, brave boy.”

“‘m not…”

“Hush. You asked me to talk, let me talk,” he scolded him. “You behaved like an ass but you are my pretty and brave boy.”

The fire ghoul nipped at his earlobe playfully. It nearly made Rain smile. “Tried so hard to get rid of me, didn’t ya? It’s not so easy, Angelfish, should’ve known that.”

Rain let his body go slack again, truly relaxing now that everything seemed normal for a moment. If he tried hard enough he’d be able to forget how he hurt, how hard he messed up and how bad he felt about it. Dewdrop continued talking, mumbling soft words into his ear, pressing kisses to his damp skin in between them. Some things were hard to believe, some made him feel warm, some made his heart clench painfully, but Dewdrop continued talking. That’s what mattered. Rain didn’t even realize how much he had missed his voice alone.

He could fall asleep in that bath, cradled in the fire ghoul’s arms. He nearly did, stopped only by Dewdrop shifting, reaching for a bottle of shower gel and a loofah. Rain panicked, heart suddenly in his throat as he grabbed the other’s arm tightly. “Hey, shhh, it’s alright. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving, Rainy.”

Dewdrop nudged him to sit up once his initial fear had passed. The tub was huge, they could not only fit in there comfortably together, but also maneuver all they needed to. The fire ghoul smoothed a hand down Rain’s back, soothing him as he wetted and lathered the loofah with gel.

“Can I?” he asked, making sure Rain was okay with what he wanted to do.

He nodded, muttering, “I’m a mess.”

“Well, you have a nose,” Dewdrop chuckled. “I’m not gonna be lying to you.”

He was right, of course. It was hard to not end up a mess without taking care of oneself for weeks and that’s exactly what Rain did.

He smiled, though. 

Barely a hint, the corner of his lips raised upwards by quarter of an inch, but it was a smile.

Dewdrop leaned down to press a kiss to the top of Rain’s spine before bringing the sponge to his skin, starting to gently wash him. The water ghoul closed his eyes again and relaxed, finally letting himself be taken care of, letting himself feel all the love the other had for him through his tender touches.

No matter how far Rain would come, one thing would never change and it would be the fact that Dewdrop was simply too good for him. Too good for this world.

“Droplet?” he whispered after some time, when the fire ghoul settled in between his legs to wash his chest.

He smiled up at him sweetly and Rain’s heart swelled. “Hm?”

“Would you…” he swallowed thickly and felt his cheeks heat up. “Is there still a chance for us to… you know?”

“What, Rainy?”

“Mate? Get married?”

There were a few moments of silence, but Dewdrop didn’t stop the light scrubbing. Rain hung his head, now burning with shame. How stupid it was to ask that. “You don't have to say anything, don't have to agree, I just… I need to know if you can still… consider it after all I've done. Just tell me if there's a chance.”

“There's more than a chance, Angelfish,” the fire ghoul looked up at him again. There was no lie in his glowing eyes when he spoke. There was only love.

“R– Really? You still want–”

“Of course I do, idiot,” Dewdrop scoffed. “I can't live without you. And you aren't that bad.”

“Fuck…” Rain felt like an impossible weight was just lifted off of him. His eyes were stinging but at the same time he couldn’t keep his lips from finally forming a full smile, something actually bright and real. “I love you so much, I can't live without you either, I'm so sorry, I was awful and–”

“Stop,” Dewdrop stopped him with a finger over his chapped lips. “It's behind us, it's okay.”

“I love you,” he repeated, breathless.

“I love you, too,” the fire ghoul shook his head with a grin. “Now are we calling the girls to help with the planning or…?”

Rain furrowed his brows in confusion. “W– what?”

“We're getting married aren't we?”

“You want– now?”

“Why wait?” Dewdrop shrugged and Rain could cry. He just might.

“Oh… oh, okay,” he mumbled instead, “yeah. Good point.”

The fire ghoul purred and pressed his lips to Rain’s own and it was another thing he hadn't realized he missed to a point of physical pain until he was given it again. Dewdrop pulled away way too soon, but Rain wouldn’t complain. Not yet, at least. “D’ya wanna get out? Go to bed and rest?”

“Soon,” the water ghoul sighed. The other nodded and rearranged himself in the bathtub, ending up with Rain against his chest again.

Dewdrop kicked up a purr and muttered into his ear, “You’re wearing a dress, right?”

“I am?”

“Are you not?”

Rain sighed with a smile, “I am.”

The tour ended two months ago.

It has been over a month since Rain started to get better. Not physically—nobody knew if that would come—but mentally. It is a road full of bumps and curves and turnarounds, but most of the tears and grief are left behind. Whatever will happen in the future, Rain has his pack. Enlarged now. He has Dewdrop.

And Dewdrop finally has Rain. All of him.

Whatever will happen, they will get through it.

“Hey, Bambi,” Swiss snaps Rain out of his thoughts. “You ready?”

“Nearly, I just–” he grunts, fumbling with the zipper on his side. “Can’t close this thing.”

“Lemme help,” the multi ghoul chuckles as he comes closer and swats Rain’s hands away from the offending zipper. He fixes it quickly and pats him on the shoulder, taking a few steps back to look him over. “Well, well…”

“What?” Rain scoffs with his eyebrows raised, ringed and manicured hands smoothing down the silky fabric of his dress.

“Nothing, I’m just proud of you,” Swiss mutters. “Now let’s go get your man."

End notes: Thank you so much for reading. Like I said at the beginning, this work is very important and special to me, I hope you liked it. I'd really appreciate feedback if you did, whether just a like/reblog or a whole ass essay. It wasn't easy to write and yeah, I'd really appreciate it <3

[hypnoneghoul]

I just got diagnosed with eds and ill have to pick up some knee braces tmr and im getting sm anxiety bcs I hate the hospital :/

Can I get a rain(and dew maybe?) fic w that exact scenario? I need my brain to chill 😭

i just scribbled something small very quickly in class, didn't want to make you wait, i know the feeling and it sucks. hope you like it and feel better about the whole thing soon. have some silly fluffy raindrop in the meantime

“Droplet?” Rain asked—mumbled—from where he was resting his cheek against Dewdrop’s shoulder.

“Yeah?” They have been stuck in a hospital waiting room for half an hour now. Rain had just gotten an official diagnosis and now the doctor told him to wait to get measured and fitted for knee braces right away. The diagnosis itself, even though a sentence of a kind, was a relief to the water ghoul. To the entire pack. It’s easier to fight back when you know your enemy and the peace of mind once the illness becomes a fact is unmatchable. The diagnosis was good.

But for some reason it was the braces that freaked Rain out.

“This is… weird,” he said, scooting closer to Dewdrop, chasing his warmth. It wasn’t exactly cold in the corridor, it was the hospital’s energy. Rain hated it, it all felt wrong and uneasy and filled him with additional anxiety about the whole ordeal. “The braces– it’s a whole… I dunno, ‘nother level.”

“Yeah, it is,” the fire ghoul agreed as he wiggled his arm from between him and Rain to wrap it around him and hold him close and warm, “but it’s not weird weird. Doesn’t make you weird.”

“I’m not so sure ‘bout that…”

“Would you say that to Zephyr?” Dewdrop asked and Rain bit his lip, his fake accusatory tone causing the water ghoul to smile a little.

“No,” Rain admitted. He brought his hand to play with a loose thread on the fire ghoul’s jeans. The jeans that had seen everything and somehow still were in one piece.

“People are gonna stare. I don’t like that off stage.”

“Exactly! Nothing wrong or weird in all that.” The fire ghoul shrugged, booping Rain’s nose with a finger. It was so cold that a second of contact was enough for Dewdrop to feel it and so he leaned down to kiss the tip of his mate’s nose with his warm lips. “We’re getting you something that’ll help. I am happy about that, even if you have doubts.”

“Oh, absolutely,” Dewdrop confirmed, but there wasn't any worry in his voice. He was confident in all he was saying and he couldn’t have known how much it helped Rain to feel better. “Humans do that, you know, but thankfully I can breathe some fire to take the attention away from you any time.”

Rain snorted at that. “You can’t breathe fire, droplet.”

“Sure I can,” he said matter-of-factly, squeezing the water ghoul against his side. “Besides, with your luck I bet your braces are gonna be the most badass things ever. And with your styling skill you’ll come up with the best outfits for them.”

“I’ll definitely try,” Rain chuckled, not caring about the people walking past them all the time. He leaned his body against Dewdrop’s even more, fully cuddling on the stiff plastic hospital seats.

“What’s that stupid slang thing that Phantom and Aurora use all the time? Oh, I know–” the fire ghoul giggled to himself. “You’ll slay, fish boy.”

“Serve cunt, even,” Rain added as he looked up at his mate and grinned.

“Lucifer, I’m too old for this.” Dewdrop shook his head. They both laughed for a few more moments before Rain’s doctor interrupted them, walking out of his office.

“Ready for the fitting?” he asked.

The water ghoul looked at Dewdrop, received an encouraging nod, and got back to the human. “Ready.”

[hypnoneghoul]

go hypnone, if it's okay could I ask for something with rain and his physical pains? my feet and wrist have flaired up for no real reason this week and it made me think of him.

never gonna say no to some projecting onto rain. also i hope your feet and wrist stop giving you hard time asap :/

580 words, hurt/comfort/fluff

“Did my favorite water ghoul die in his sleep?” Swiss burst through Rain’s door, no regards to anyone’s privacy as usual. He walked over to the bed and the Rain-shaped lump on it. “It’s nearing lunch and you haven’t had breakfast. You love breakfast, raincloud, are you okay?”

“What do you think?” he growled from under all the covers.

“Rain,” Swiss said sternly, in that specific voice that the water ghoul knew all too well. He and Swiss had made an arrangement ages ago, that when Rain acted like an asshole towards someone who didn’t deserve it because of his pain, Swiss would scold him. It worked.

“‘m sorry,” Rain mumbled.

“It’s alright.” The multi ghoul smiled sadly, knowing now that it was indeed a bad day for Rain. He sat by him on the edge of the bed and put a hand over the lump made of Rain and the bedding. “Can I see your pretty face, princess?”

With a loud grumble the lump shifted and Rain’s head poked out, eyes puffy with purple under them. “Hi, Bambi.”

“Hi, Swiss.”

The multi ghoul laid down on his side—as close to Rain as the blankets and comforters he had wrapped around himself would allow—and kissed the tip of his nose. “I’m sorry, princess. It sucks. Anything I can do?”

“No, it’ll pass, just–” the water ghoul sighed. “Just lay with me, okay? Hold me?”

Swiss smiled and leaned in for another kiss, this time to the other’s lips. “Always, raincloud.”

He shucked off his jeans as Rain wiggled an arm out to lift the contents of his nest. Swiss chuckled at that—the reminder about how a nest should look like on the tip of his tongue. The water ghoul was famous for getting under his nest rather than into it.

Swiss crawled back in and laid on his back, letting Rain choose how he wanted to cuddle, also not wanting to jostle his aching vessel by pulling him close. The water ghoul shuffled down a bit and glued himself to the other’s side, laying his head on Swiss’ chest.

“Can you warm me up a bit, too?” Rain asked, looking up at Swiss with his big, cerulean blue eyes. The multi ghoul nodded, leaning down to kiss the water ghoul as he kicked up his temperature. He smuggled a tiny bit of quintessence between the waves of infernal heat. He immediately felt a bit guilty for that, knowing Rain didn’t exactly agree to it, but he couldn’t not do it. 

“I love you, princess,” Swiss muttered quietly into his hair, squeezing him tightly, but carefully. “Every damn day I wish I could just– take it all away from you, you have no idea–”

“Swiss,” Rain said. “It’s not your fault.”

“I know it’s not, but–”

“Baby, you do blame yourself. You stink of it,” the water ghoul chuckled, poking Swiss’ belly under the comforters. 

“Excuse me– I don’t stink!”

“Well, not all the time. Just when you're sick with worry for your… favorite water ghoul? That’s what you said or did I mishear?” Rain threw a leg over the multi ghoul’s thighs and laid himself out on top of him, his chin perched up on his sternum.

“Oh, it’s not like you have a lot of competition… but yeah,” Swiss laughed, “I guess you are. And I guess I may stink sometimes, but it’s the smell of love, Bambi.”

The water ghoul grinned and batted his eyelashes at him. “Sure, sure… I love you, too.”

[hypnoneghoul]

a lot of things can go wrong during a ghoul summoning ritual. sometimes their bodies don't go through the portal (for a lack of better word) as they should and don't form as they should

that's how we got connective tissue disorders having ghouls, such as zephyr rain and phantom

their tissues quite literally didn't connect properly

[hypnoneghoul]

rain is tired all the time. and in pain.

it is what it is, what comes with a faulty vessel like his or zephyrs. he's used to it already. or is he?

he can dealt with it, mostly. sometimes it's better, sometimes it's worse, but in general he's okay. he's got his pack, he's got his music. he's okay.

until he's not.

until all he can do is lay and stare at the ceiling unable to move with a lump in his throat because everything hurts and he's too tired to even cry.

his phone is thrown somewhere next to him on the bed, battery probably below 20%. he could grab it and send a text (would his fingers manage?) to someone, anyone, and ask for...

yeah, what exactly? help? help in what? there's no helping him, is there? he's fucked up and that's it.

so he lays there, unable to move, unable to cry, unable to fall asleep. all he can do is listen to his shallow breathing and racing heart and feel all the pain coursing through his broken body.

until it's decent again.

until the day when the decent won't come back...

[hypnoneghoul]

rain zephyr phantom respectively

[hypnoneghoul]

regressor phantom being taking care of by eds having rain who injured in some way and helping rain in every way that he can. gets all the things off the shelves for them and helps clean the place they’re walking so they don’t trip and get injured further. just a really good kid trying to help someone he cares about deeply

phantom is such a good kid :(

my hands are really useless today so if there's any typos, no there is not

Phantom was feeling fuzzy since he woke up, nearly whole day now. When he saw Rain walk into the kitchen, where he was rummaging through the cabinets, on their forearm crutches he immediately dropped. He was by Rain's side in a second, "D'ya need help with pain?"

"No, it's, uhm- it's okay, I'm fine," the water ghoul answered but their poorly hidden grunt and furrowed brows didn't help in assuring Phantom.

"Rainy, can help, wanna help," he pouted up at the older ghoul. He needed to help. "Please, lemme help. D'ya want a snack?"

"Yeah, that's why I came here," they grumbled and reached up to one of the higher cabinets where the ghouls stored packets of apple sauce. The crutch that was hanging off of Rain's arm swung in the air when they lifted it and hit their hip, making the ghoul hiss in pain.

"Oh, lemme help-" Phantom jumped to open the cabinet and get the apple sauce out. He presented it to Rain with big eyes full of hope he managed to help.

"Phantom, I really-" they cut themself off, looking into the quintessence ghoul's eyes. They were frustrated, yes, but not with Phantom. He didn't deserve to be a victim of Rain's irritation, he was really just trying to help. "Yes, okay. I'd like your help."

The quintessence ghoul's entire face lit up as Rain did grab the apple sauce from him and stuffed it into his pocket, mumbling a quiet 'thank you'. When the water ghoul turned to leave the kitchen Phantom all but threw himself onto the floor to sweep away some garbage laying around. There was always stuff all over the floor in the den... for some reason.

He moved various items away from Rain's path, so they wouldn't trip or slip their crutches on anything. He also roughly wiped the floor with a mysterious sock that he'd just found (Rain prayed it wasn't Swiss') to make sure there wasn't anything spilled that could also put Rain at some kind of risk, "'s this okay?"

"Yes, kiddo, thank you very much," Rain forced himself to smile down at Phantom as they walked over to the couch in the common room and dropped down onto it with a grunt.

Before he could as much as blink, Phantom was in between their legs looking up at them with his biggest puppy eyes, "Need pain gone? Or, uhm... sm'thing else? Can do 'nything for you, Rainy."

"If you insist, little one," Rain sighed reaching out to boop Phantom's nose, making him giggle. "I'd appreciate dulling my pain a bit. It's my hips today."

Phantom's soft hands were on the water ghoul's hips in a flash. He squeezed his eyes, bit down on his tongue in concentration and let his magic flow through him fingertips into Rain's aching body. They sighed with relief as the first tendrils of quintessence wrapped around his joints, "That's nice, kiddo, thank you."

"Mhm," he hummed and focused on spreading the comfort both further up into Rain's spine and down, into their legs. He worked until Rain's head thumped against the cushions on the back of the couch and the room was filled with quiet purring.

"Hm... Tommy?" he perked up with a chirp. "C'mere."

Phantom obliged, getting up. He gave Rain a moment to arrange himself more comfortably on the couch and soon they smiled at him and waved him over. He was a bit reluctant, not wanting to hurt Rain in any way, so he gently laid down next to the water ghoul, keeping his limbs to himself.

This wouldn't cut it, though, for Rain, so they pulled him closer, until his head was on their chest and their legs and tails were tangled together, "nap time, little one."

Who was Phantom to argue with that?

[hypnoneghoul]

i would love to see your take on an age regression based headcanons or fic

Guppy

WC: 1,5K

Relationship: Little!Rain/Caregiver!Swiss

Tags: Age regression, they/them, eds Rain

Swiss realised the noise he heard was caused by Rain falling over. Now they sat against the wall with a pout, arms crossed over their chest. The multi ghoul already knew what kind of days it was for Rain, then.

Notes: This is not age play, nothing sexual here, age regression is a coping mechanism for Rain.

Read under the cut or on AO3.

Swiss was in the common room kitchen, making himself a cup of morning coffee, when he heard a thump coming from the corridor. He left his half filled mug to go check what was going on and his heart nearly shattered when Swiss realised the noise he heard was caused by Rain falling over. Now they sat against the wall with a pout, arms crossed over their chest. The multi ghoul already knew what kind of day it was for Rain, then.

“Hi, guppy,” Swiss came up to where the water ghoul was plopped on the floor, crouching in front of them. “What happened here, huh?”

“Fell,” they grumbled, “legs- uhm… don’t work.”

“Ah, it happens, yeah?” the multi ghoul scanned Rain’s long limbs, noticing both of their ankles were twisted. “Let’s get you up, kiddo, we’ve gotta take care of you.”

Rain nodded, their face still a bit pouty, as Swiss grabbed them by their armpits and hoisted the lanky ghoul up, taking on most of their weight as they giggled. Rain fell just outside their bedroom door, the multi ghoul presumed they woke up feeling small, for some reason, and their little sleep-addled brain apparently forgot to grab their crutches. 

Back in the room Swiss sat Rain down on their bed with a chirp, as he went to the water ghoul’s special wardrobe, dedicated to things they used only when little. He dug out bright purple forearm crutches adorned with tons of stickers, most fish themed, two blue ankle braces, ocean themed elastic bandages and a weird looking lump of straps. When the multi ghoul turned back to Rain he saw them waiting patiently with their favourite plushie - a big blue shark - clutched tightly to their chest.

“There’s your friend,” Swiss chuckled, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Okay, guppy, can you tell me if we’re going for braces today or will the bandages be enough?”

Asking that, the multi ghoul presented both options, giving the other a moment to consider, “I- I think… those,” they pointed at the hard braces, wiggling their outstretched legs a bit, “‘m wobbly.”

“Sure thing, kiddo, let’s put them on, yeah?” Rain nodded enthusiastically, mirroring Swiss’s grin as he took one of their wobbly, as they called it, legs into his lap, putting on a sock, making them let out a little giggle, “What’s so funny, hm?”

“T- tickles,” they laughed, hiding behind their hands.

“Does it now, huh?” Swiss teased, sliding a claw up the sole of Rain’s bare foot.

“Sw- swissy,” Rain snorted, squirming a bit, “Sto-oppp.”

The multi ghoul would continue, always eager to hear the other’s purest of laughs, but considering the state of their legs today, it wasn’t a good idea. Last thing he might've wanted was for Rain to make it worse by accident. Or risking their mindset switching and them ending up in panic because the tickles started making them actually uncomfortable. That's why Swiss just leaned down to place a kiss on the water ghoul’s shin, just under their knee, and got to putting the braces on.

It went quickly, Swiss tied both of them tightly for good support but loose enough for it to still be somewhat comfortable, checking in on Rain’s face as he did so.

“Alright, kiddo, all set,” he announced as he tucked the stray piece of lace into Rain’s sock. “Everything comfy, nothing scratchy or squeezing in the bad way?”

“Nuh-uh,” they shook their head, cheek nuzzled into their plushie as a quiet purr started bubbling in their chest.

“Okay, guppy, will you let me know if something’s wrong?” Swiss asked, despite knowing that any discomfort would immediately show itself on the water ghoul’s face. They nodded, melting further into their nest. “Now, I think it’s time for breakfast, yeah?”

Rain perked up at that, “Can we… uhm, cea… crea…”

“Cereal, guppy?”

“Yes!” the water ghoul clasped their hand together, a big grin on their face again.

“Sure thing, let’s go get you your cereal, then,” Swiss got up, extending both of his hands for Rain to take. They looked at them with a bit of reluctance, biting their bottom lip, and the multi ghoul realised his mistake in a moment, withdrawing one of his hands. Rain chirped, gripping the second one then as they let themself be moved to a standing position.

The reason for Rain not wanting to take both of Swiss’ hands was that they had to have one of their own free for their shark plushie, of course, nothing else. That would be a small issue, though, considering both of the water ghoul’s ankles were wobbly today, they needed both of their crutches. Fortunately, Swiss was experienced enough as little Rain’s caregiver that he had a trick for that.

“Here, guppy, take this one,” he pushed the right crutch into their hand. When he was sure Rain was stable enough, the multi ghoul turned to grab something resembling a weird harness from the bedside table. “You remember this cool thing?”

Rain cocked their head to the side, inspecting what Swiss held. Once they realised, they brought the shark close to their chest, losing a bit of balance, as they furrowed their brows.

Swiss smiled softly at how protective over their plushie Rain was, knowing he had to act carefully now, “Yeah, you do remember. Let’s get it on, huh?”

The water ghoul grumbled a little under their breath, but after a moment let Swiss wrap their shark in the dark blue pieces of fabric. Rain still held on to the toy’s tail, though, not daring to let go for even a second. When Swiss was done with the plushie, he pushed it against Rain’s chest holding it there and gently took their wrist, prompting them to let go of its tail now that there was another point of contact. Rain obliged, unclenching their fingers, and Swiss guided their hand into one of the loops, settling the strap over their shoulder. He then pulled away and gave Rain the other crutch “Okay, guppy, now, take this here, yeah.”

When Rain rested their weight on the left crutch, Swiss took back the right one for a moment, repeating the process of pulling their hand through the loops of straps, giving the aid back as he finished, “There we go, all ready for your cereal now.”

The multi ghoul smiled as he took in the image of Rain, now grinning too, proudly wearing their shark plushie in the Swiss-made carrier on their front, “Yeah… h- hungry.”

“No wonder, kiddo,” he ruffled their hair, making the ghoul giggle again, “Let’s go then.”

Swiss splayed his hand over Rain’s lower back, subtly supporting them just in case. Rain was really good with their mobility aids both on a daily basis and when regressed, but little Rain got clumsier than usual, prone to losing balance or tripping over their own feet. The multi ghoul would lie if he said he didn’t find them adorable, sometimes bringing back the old fan nickname - ‘bambi’.

The way to the common room was positively uneventful, though, and soon Rain was sat at the table, chin rested over the top of their plushie’s head, patiently waiting for their Swissy to bring them breakfast. The multi ghoul came back from the kitchen with a mug of coffee and a blue plastic bowl with a coral reef printed on its outside. He put it down in front of Rain, digging up a spoon with a plastic handle, matching the bowl, favourite set of the ghoul when small. The only acceptable, really.

The water ghoul grabbed the spoon, holding it in a way Swiss couldn’t mirror no matter how hard he tried. He was always surprised with how Rain managed to hold it and not spill milk everywhere. They got to devouring the cereal, Swiss sitting down to finally sip on his coffee that got abandoned earlier by accident. The multi ghoul observed Rain as they munched on the honey hoops, a happy trill escaping them from time to time, until they grabbed the bowl in two hands and drank down the leftover milk.

“All done?” Rain nodded as Swiss wiped a few drops of milk from their small moustache with his thumb. “Is there anything you want to do today, kiddo?”

“Hmmm…” they sighed, brows furrowing in thought, “‘m bit tired…”

“Didn’t sleep well, huh?” Rain shook their head. “I propose cuddles, then.”

The water ghoul chirped with a smile, already scrambling to get up from the table and get to the couch, “Hey, slowly, guppy. There’s no rush, we’ve got all day.”

“Sorry,” they mumbled, settling back down.

“None of that, it’s okay,” Swiss assured, petting between their horns. “Here, let me help.”

The multi ghoul moved back the chair Rain was sitting on, handing them their crutches again. He guided them to the couch, taking the aids away once they sat down. Swiss himself leaned against the back of it, arms open. Rain took the invitation, curling up on Swiss’ lap with their legs thrown over the armrest, their plushie now squeezed between the ghouls’ chests.

“There we go, kiddo,” Swiss cooed, wrapping his arms around the already purring ghoul, “we can both make good use of some more rest, yeah?”

The multi ghoul thought he may have heard something that was supposed to be a response, but when he looked down, Rain was already half dozed off. And, well, who was Swiss to stop his guppy from sleeping comfortably in his arms?

[hypnoneghoul]

Could we maybe get a little something about Rain having a POTS episode during sexy time? This totally happened to me once. I passed out and it freaked my partner out like bad... 😬 Whoops

sorry it took so long, I just didn't have any decent ideas how to go about this lmao

Rain was feeling dizzy since he woke up, blamed it on the weather. He spent most of the day in his room, then the commons, avoiding activities that could make him pass out, eating some salty snacks.

But then Swiss showed up.

He crawled onto the couch where Rain was lounging and glued himself to his side, purring. It didn't take long for the multi ghoul to start to slide his hands over Rain's thighs, his chest. A small brush against his nipple, accidental touch too close to his cock.

One word from Rain and Swiss would stop, he knew that, but despite not feeling the best, the water ghoul wanted it to develop into more concrete touches. He was in the mood even if his body wouldn't agree.

"Swiss?" Rain breathed after a particularly purposeful hump against his thigh.

"Mhm?"

"Get me to your room," Swiss perked up at that, toothy grin on full display, eyes glistening with need.

"On it, princess," he said as he hoisted Rain up and into his arms.

That's how they ended up in their current predicament - Rain sprawled out under Swiss on his back as the multi ghoul pounded into him. Every thrust knocked the breath out of Rain's lungs as well as made a sharp wave of dizziness wash over him.

But Swiss felt so good...

Rain was so out of it he didn't register Swiss asking him a question and himself answering to it. What he did register was being sharply turned around and ending up sitting on the multi ghoul with his hands on his hips.

"Come on, ride me, baby," he breathed. Rain tried, once, before realizing he fucked up. Upright position did not help, quite the opposite.

He remembers falling forward and face planting into Swiss' chest and then he was out, unconscious.

When he came back, he was under Swiss again, his terrified face looming close over his own, "Oh, Satan, are you alive?"

"W- what?" Rain mumbled, confused.

"I thought you fucking died on me! Just... flopped down, I didn't know what to do!" the multi ghoul freaked out. He knelt back and wiped his face with his hand, sighing exasperatedly.

"Sorry," he couldn't help but giggle. Swiss was really funny when he freaked out.

"Rain, it's not funny!"

"I know, I know, it's just..." another involuntary giggle interrupted him, "you are."

"I'M SERIOUS, YOU SCARED ME!" Swiss threw his hands up dramatically.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry," Rain lied. It would never not be funny. "However, I think we were in the middle of something so..."

"Are you seriously-"

"Swiss," he interrupted him. There was a task at hand. "What do I always tell you helps if I feel like passing out?"

The multi ghoul hesitated, not sure of the simple answer, "Something... salty?"

"Yeah," he chuckled. "What's nice and salty that I like to eat?"

This took Swiss a bit longer to get to but-

"Oh."

"Yes, oh. So let's get back to it. Give it to me, make sure I don't pass out again, won't ya?"

One thing about Swiss was that he cared about his mate, deeply. And well, if Rain needed cum to feel better, Swiss was happy to deliver. Any and all amount.

[hypnoneghoul]

hello im the same anon as the eds regressing rain ask and im also interested in maybe little rain having a pots thing happen? i don’t know a lot about pots but maybe they pass out while regressing and freak out a bit, or maybe another ghoul is also regressed and they’re hanging out and rain passes out and that spooks the other ghoul? really go how you will with that idea. again feel free to not do it if youre not interested in it i just think its an interesting idea

sorry it took so long :(

"think 'm hungwy," Rain mumbled, as he put down the block they had in their hands. Phantom nodded at him and hummed around the tip of his tail that ended up on his mouth some time earlier.

There wasn't anyone else with them, it started out with Rain taking care of little Phantom, but his own brain couldn't help joining the quintessence ghoul in his regression. No other ghoul was around so they were on their own.

Before Rain even stood up fully he paused, a quiet "oh" escaping their lips. Phantom perked up at the sound with a curious noise of his own.

"T- tommy-" and they tumbled to the floor.

Phantom panicked, Rain just... he just passed out and Phantom was too little, he didn't know what to do. His friend was hurt and he didn't know what to do.

He whined as he crawled closer to the water ghoul sprawled out on the carpet, tears were already gathering in his eyes.

"Rainyyy," Phantom pawed weakly at their chest letting out a series of distressed noises, subconsciously calling for help, "Rainy, wake up!"

"Phantom? What happened?" he heard someone and they... they sounded angry.

"I- I didn', dunno what- I didn' do 'nything," the quintessence ghoul sobbed, still holding onto Rain and weakly shaking him.

"Shhh, I know you didn't, it's not your fault," it was Dew, he realised as he came closer. His warm hands rested on Phantom's back, rubbing it with an intention to soothe. "It happenes to Rain sometimes, you know that. It's okay, I'll take care of them, okay?"

"Mhmmm, Dewy, pwease, f- fix 'em," he whined, looking up at Dewdrop with wet, red rimmed eyes, pleading. The fire ghoul leaned down to place a kiss on the distressed ghoul's forehead and got up again. "N- no, c'me back, fix 'em!"

"I will, kiddo, don't worry. I gotta get something," Dew assured before disappearing into the kitchen. Phantom sobbed again but the fire ghoul was fast and was back by him and Rain in a flash.

"Okay, take this," he handed Phantom a toy hand fan, the type that works on batteries and all it needs to work is its button pressed down. The quintessence ghoul's brows furrowed as he took the toy. "Turn it on and fan Rain's face, okay? Can you do that?"

A task.

Phantom got a task and it was supposed to help Rain. Of course he would do it. He took a deep breath, and turned the fan on. Its funny buzz made him giggle through the tears still flowing down his cheeks. He was a very emotionally sensitive ghoul, that's all.

"Very good, yeah, like that," Dewdrop praised as Phantom focused to keep his hands steady, to keep the cold air on Rain's face. He bit his bottom lip in concentration.

It took just a moment for Rain to stir. He never passed out for long, anyway, he hardly ever fully lost consciousness, "R- Rainy?"

"Mhmmm," they hummed, blinking slowly.

"Welcome back, fish boy," Dew chuckled, moving a strand of hair from their forehead. "Little, aren't you?"

Rain just whined and pouted, and that told Dew enough.

"Rainy... awe you fine?" Phantom asked, finally sparing a second to wipe the tears from his face with his sleeve. Rain looked over at him and nodded. He then spotted the toy still clutched tightly in one of the quintessence ghoul's hands and smiled before diving in to bury their face in Phantom's belly.

He was too little for words, now, but they understood well enough that Phantom had helped them, and they wanted to thank him. Hugging him tightly and chirping happily turned out to be his best idea at the moment.

And Phantom most definitely got the intention, bending down to wrap his own arms around the ghoul in his lap as he started purring.

"I'll go get some snacks," Dew sighed, smiling at the two.

.

.

.

Just a disclaimer, most folks with POTS don't fully pass out, usually its just ultra dizziness and feeling like you are going to pass out, and even if it is a full black out its not for long, few seconds usually. I made Rain fully loose consciousness for a longer bit to, idk, make the situation more "dramatic" lmao

[hypnoneghoul]

hypermobile regressors rain and phantom are my favorite.

little rainy gets princess carried by swiss (the joints are acting up Bad and walking hurts) and phantom gets carried by mountain (is jsut extremely mentally small). phantom hurts his something bending his joints out of place and then gets a some sort brace put on him and hes just so happy because “matching!!! matching rainy!!”

oh my god the babies :((((

rain is such a princess, oh my god, fr. they have crutches, they have a wheelchair but NO, swiss is their best option, duh? don't get me wrong, tho, swiss wouldn't even dream of complaining, he absolutely loves it!

phantom sometimes regresses so young that even if he wasn't hypermobile he'd have issues with walking. but he is, so no walking at all for little tommy. mountain does always pick him up but he likes being a backpack more than a princess like rain. he doesn't hurt himself on purpose to match with rain but when he's little and gets injured the only way to keep him relatively calm about it is making him matching with rain. braces or crutches or anything, they gotta be matching hehehe

[hypnoneghoul]

had a thought about pots rain being funny… this happened to me with my dad and mom and it was perfect for swissraindrop LMAO

under the cut, 265 words

When Rain woke up, Swiss was already gone and as he checked the time it was not surprising at all. The multi ghoul always got up way earlier than Rain did, and no matter how much he enjoyed staring at his sleeping mate, he couldn't help getting painfully bored quite quickly.

Rain stretched, yawning, and crawled out of the bed. He paused as he got up, waiting for the usual dizziness that attacked him every time he did so.

It didn’t come, though.

Weird, but in a good way.

The water ghoul shrugged and left the room, heading for the commons. Just as he was about to set their foot in the dorm, his vision went dark and before he realised he was siding down the nearest wall.

Rain heard footsteps and he recognised Swiss by his scent, not exactly seeing him.

“Am I supposed to do something?”

“Nah, give me a minute,” Rain waved him off. Not literally, he didn’t really feel his hands. “Just a power outage.”

Swiss shrugged and turned to go back inside. He flopped down onto the couch and resumed the TV series he’s been watching, munching at some chips.

After a short moment the multi ghoul’s show was interrupted again, this time by a loud “WHAT THE FUCK!?”

“What?” he asked, looking behind at a panicked Dewdrop, now standing over Rain, still on the floor.

“WHY IS OUR MATE ON THE FLOOR WHILE YOU’RE WATCHING TV!?”

Both Rain and Swiss giggled, Dewdrop’s eyes jumping from one to the other. Then they spoke, at the same time:

“Just a power outage."

[hypnoneghoul]

I am not the same anon but I would love another fic about little eds having rain. Love your fics btw, so good and comforting to read!

hi dear anon! have some eds having little rainy being cute, pure fluff (ft. swissalps)

“What do we have here, huh?” Mountain asked as he set a foot in the common room. The question was rather rhetorical.

Rain, wrapped up in a blanket, was curled up in Swiss’ lap, some marine life documentary running on the TV. The water ghoul didn’t even notice Mountain come in or speak, they were so invested in it, all but glued to the screen. A pair of purple crutches resting against the back of a couch was another hint, a strong one, as to how the two ghouls ended up doing pretty much nothing in the middle of a day.

“Hey, big guy,” Swiss greeted the earth ghoul, inviting him over with a nod. Mountain noticed he wanted to move his arms, maybe to wave or pat the couch next to them, but it looked like he couldn't move, his limbs hidden beneath a very fluffy, special baby blue blanket.

Mountain did get closer, though, sitting on Swiss’ right where he could actually see Rain’s face, half hidden behind the blanket, “How are you, sweetie?”

“Mounty?” Rain perked up as they finally noticed the earth ghoul, only when he was right in front of their face. A face that was now split with a toothy grin.

“That’s right, petal," he chuckled, ruffling Rain's hair. The water ghoul leaned into the touch, kicking up a quiet, delicate purr. "So, how are you?"

"'m fine," they sighed, their weight slipping off of Swiss and onto Mountain just a bit. "Was jus' tired, an- and m' legs hurt. But s'okay."

"Oh, sweetie," Mountain cooed, trying to snake one of his hands under the blanket to rub their offending limbs. To no avail, though, Rain was fully cocooned. "Is Swissy warming you up alright?"

"Mhm! Swissy s'nice to me, "they purred grinning up at the aforementioned.

"How could I not treat my little Rainy like the princess they are, hm?" the multi ghoul teased, reveling in the cutest little blush that crept up Rain's cheeks as they tried to burrow their face back into the blanket.

"Stooop," Rain tried to argue but their little giggles, deadly adorable, sold them out right there.

"Never! You are our perfect little princess!" 

"Most definitely," Mountain laughed as Swiss leaned down to kiss the water ghoul's horn. He scratched their forehead with his stubble along the way, pulling out a high pitched, but still pleased, chirp out of the ghoul.

"Oh, did someone like that?"

"N- no, not a'all," came back, muffled by the blanket, but the grumble was as fake as it could get.

"I think you did, petal," the earth ghoul whispered, as if Swiss was not supposed to hear it.

"Mounty! Shhh!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, little one! I didn't think at all," he tried so hard to keep his serious expression flawless, "I promise I'll be quiet, won't tell him a word!"

Rain trilled at that, and then silence fell as they got lost obviously very deep in thought. Swiss took it as an opportunity to tease them some more, "Whatcha thinkin' about, guppy?"

The water ghoul's head snapped in his direction, brows furrowed. They didn't say a word but their gaze moved onto Mountain and after a second a finger wiggled its way out of the blanket cocoon, curling up in a "come closer" motion.

Mountain obliged, his ear ending up just in front of where Rain's mouth was behind the blanket, "You won't tell him?"

"Never, sweetie," the drummer promised, deadly serious. "My lips are glued shut."

"How can they be shut, you're talking!" they giggled. "Dummy!"

Mountain felt his stomach flip from the amount of cuteness. They were right, though, there was no way to deny.

He licked his finger and ran it over his lips, then pressed them together. He lifted up that finger, telling Rain to wait, and when he lowered it, he pretended to try to open his mouth but he made it look like he actually glued it shut.

Rain giggled again, absolutely adorable, as they motioned for the other to get closer again. Then they whispered, "I love Swissy."

Said ghoul had to bite his tongue to not audibly go 'awww' at Rain's little confession.

Mountain, though, shot back, looking stunned, making his closed mouth move like he was trying really hard to say something.

"Y'can speak!" Rain laughed, their shoulders shaking under the blanket. Mountain hummed, mouth still closed, and threw his hands up, as if he was trying to say he couldn't do anything now.

"Looks like he needs some help," Swiss chimed in. "What do you say, kiddo?"

Rain thought for a moment, their head tilting from side to side. Finally, they got an idea, "I know!"

"Oh, and what is it, guppy? How do we help our Mounty?"

"You gotta give'm a kiss, Swissy," they announced with a pride of a scientist having made a glorious discovery.

"Is that so?" the multi ghoul chuckled, winking at Mountain as he rolled his eyes, but bravely stayed in character.

"Yes! Go on!"

And who was Swiss to not obey? He leaned over Rain's shoulder and pressed his lips to Mountain's own. When they parted, the earth ghoul pretended to dramatically take a deep breath, then grinning like stupid.

"Tada!" Swiss shouted. "You're so smart, guppy, look, it worked!"

Rain shied away, hiding behind the blanket again but both Swiss and Mountain could see their proud smile very well.

"Thanks for help, boys," the latter sighed, theatrically wiping non existent sweat from his forehead. "Now, what was it about those stubborn legs of yours, sweetie?"

"Nothin' really," they shrugged, "jus' hurt."

"My poor princess," the earth ghoul cooed, pouting. His puppy eyes made an appearance too. "We can't have that, would you like me to get you something?"

"Hmmm… I just wan' cuddles…" they admitted.

"Oh, that can be arranged, guppy," Swiss chuckled, nodding at Mountain. "Big guy, get in position."

He did, moving to a corner of the couch and leaning against the back of it. Swiss then stood up, Rain gathered up in his arms, and dropped them into Mountain's lap. He grabbed them, pulling their back flush to his chest, their aching legs comfortably straightened out between Mountain's own.

Swiss put some pillows under them to help the circulation, and wrapped them in another blanket before laying down beside the already purring ghouls. He threw his arm over Rain's middle and rested his face next to their shoulder, on Mountain's arm.

Rain most definitely did not end up rubbing their own stubble over Swiss', purring louder than a jet engine.

[hypnoneghoul]

now hear me out: eds ghouls but how it impacts sex

rain fully getting fucked and just dislocating something about halfway through

595 words of exactly what the ask says

"What the FUCK just happened?" Swiss shrieked, hovering over Rain with the most confused and terrified expression the water ghoul ever saw on his face. "Did I break your fucking back?"

"N- no, chill, Swiss," Rain laughed. He was laughing, actually giggling, highly amused by Swiss' reaction, apparently, "it happens sometimes, you know that."

"Yeah but it never happened while I'm quite literally fucking you into the mattress!" the multi ghoul panicked, trying to not move an inch worried about making things worse.

"You didn't break anything, it's fine," Rain tried calming him down, but his reaction was just to funny, he couldn't stop laughing. "And it's not my back, just my hip."

"JUST your hip!? Your fucking hip, just what, popped out and you're laughing?"

"Well... yeah, it's funny," the water ghoul continued chuckling, tears were gathering in the corners of his eyes by now, making Swiss terrified even more.

"W- why are you crying, does it hurt, what am I supposed to do, what-" he started rambling, trying to move off of Rain and pull his cock out of him with as little movement as he could.

"Shhh, I'm not crying, it's from laughing," he placed his hands on Swiss' biceps, squeezing gently to ground and calm him a bit, "I'ts fine, doesn't even hurt, if I'm being honest."

"Are- are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," Rain said, smiling genuinely. Swiss seemed to believe them, but he paled a bit when he looked down to where one of Rain's legs was laying bent at a weird angle, the space over his hip looking like something was poking out from under his skin. Something that wasn't supposed to, that is.

Swiss witnessed Rain dislocating a lot of body parts over the years but he genuinely never saw his body do something like that.

"This doesn't look not-painful," he noted, moving away from that leg.

"I swear, it's fine," Rain chuckled again, poking himself in the hip with his finger, "See, didn't even flinch. It's fine, I'll fix it later."

"Bitch, the fuck you mean later!? Why not now?"

"Because now I'm still laying here extremely hard and leaking, same as you," he noted, how accurately.

"Oh, hell nah, not gonna touch you until you fix it," Swiss lifted both of his hand up in the air, moving even further away from Rain. The water ghoul sighed, running a hand down his face, smile still on it. He knew Swiss meant that, and no matter how down he always was for him, he wouldn't win him over this time.

"Okay, help me sit up then," Rain reached his hand out to Swiss, and he, very carefully, grabbed it and pulled him to a sitting position. It made his hip look even more concerning and the multi ghoul was very close to panicking again.

The water ghoul grabbed his knee with both hands and threw the dislocated leg over the edge of the bed, planting his foot on the floor. Swiss stared with wide eyes as Rain placed one of his hands on the outside of his hip, just over that weird thing poking out, and the other one lower, on the inside, just over his thigh. With a sharp push of the one hand something cracked loudly and Swiss let out a breath he didn't realise he was holding.

"There," Rain sighed, kicking that leg in the air, "can you put your dick back in me now, please?"

Well, Swiss was known to never be able to say no to Rain, especially when he said please.

[hypnoneghoul]

dont feel presured to respond to this if you dont want to bc it is a slightly different niche than you tend to write and i understand if youre not interested in it

been thinking a lot about phantom whos a regressor whos also hypermobile. rain freaking out because “NO DONT BEND YOUR [insert whatever joint] LIKE THAT YOURE GONNA GET HURT” bc they know from experience. little phantom getting confused bc to them its just. a fun thing. really enjoyable. they arent prone to getting hurt but rain doesnt want to risk the one time they do get hurt to be when theyre small (because that SUCKS, rain also knows that from experience)

wohooo im here!!! took me so long because i didn't have any fun idea so its also super short, I just don't wanna keep you waiting any more, sorry it's shit. also, rain is not exactly freaking out, just worried about the lil bug and he gets a bit sad, oops <3

"Rain, Phantom duty," Swiss announced popping his head into Rain's room and disappearing immediately after, barely letting his words leave his mouth.

"Wait, what?" they jumped but there was no one left to answer. Rain sighed, shuffled into their slippers and left their room to go look for Phantom, because whatever Swiss meant by 'duty'' was obviously about the quintessence ghoul. He wasn't in his bedroom, Swiss' door was locked.

Rain padded over to the commons, and then into the kitchen, wanting to at least get themself a snack, even if the Phantom wasn't there. But he was and the water ghoul understood what Swiss meant.

He was sitting on the counter, cross-legged, twisting and cracking their fingers like a fidget toy, his tail in his mouth as he hummed some soft tune around it.

First, Rain made a mental note to yell at Swiss for leaving Phantom alone in the kitchen when regressed. Then, "Sweetheart, please don't do that!"

Phantom lifted his head, cocking it to the side and looked at Rain with a curious little noise escaping his mouth.

"Come here, love," Rain sighed, opening their arms as an additional encouragement. Phantom all but jumped off of the counter and fell into the water ghoul's chest, "Hi, little one."

The quintessence ghoul immediately started purring, rubbing his face over Rain's shoulder and rocking on the sides of his feet, "Love, you can't do that."

"Huh?" Phantom looked up at them with confused eyes.

"Your feet, you'll get hurt."

"But 's fun," he pouted and Rain's heart nearly broke in half. They knew it could be fun, especially when little, but it didn't change the fact it could lead to getting injured. They knew it well enough from their own experience, and that it sucked even more to get injured while being small. They didn't want Phantom to experience that, ever.

He wasn't as prone to getting actual injuries because of his hypermobility as Rain or Zephyr, but the water ghoul was impossibly protective of Phantom either way, and they'd do everything in their power to keep him from getting hurt. Especially when little.

"I know, baby, but I don't want you to be in pain," they cooed, running one of their hands through Phantom's hair, the other rubbing his back soothingly. "You can get hurt if you do that."

"Is... is 't like with you?" the quintessence ghoul asked. "Like your legs?"

"Yes, love," Rain chuckled, their heart squeezing slightly as Phantom's brows furrowed in concern.

"'m sad when your legs don' work," he mumbled, deflated, hiding in Rain's neck as they pet his hair.

"Oh, sweetheart. It's just what it is, it's okay," they hugged Phantom closer. "But I would be sad if your legs would stop working. And that we can prevent, yes?"

"Mhm," he grumbled, "'ll be good."

"You're always good, baby. Such a great kid." Rain leaned down to kiss Phantom's horn. "Now, come with me and I'll show you some toys you can play with, instead of your fingers."

The water ghoul giggled when Phantom jumped up exictedly with a happiest little squeak, gripping their hand, ready to see the aforementioned toys.

[hypnoneghoul]

THEY DID WHAT!?

WC: 1,8K

Relationship: Little!Rain/Caregiver!Swiss

Tags: Age regression, they/them, eds Rain, hurt/comfort

Never before was Swiss left alone with the water ghoul when they were regressed, and when little Rain remembered a trick they wanted to show Swiss… it didn't work out to well.

Notes: More little Rain! (Again, age regression, nothing sexual here). My own cartwheel accident from yesterday brought up regressed eds Rainy thoughts and with @ominousposting we've thought about how Swiss would react, before he got experience as Rain's caregiver. So, here it is. Also tagging @everybodyshusband, for little guppy <3

Read under the cut or on AO3.

Swiss was terrified.

Did it have to be now? Did they all have to have left today?

He was not good with kits, human babies or regressed Rain. He was funny, entertaining, yeah, but taking actual care of them?

He was terrified.

Swiss was up already when the rest left. Shopping. They all went shopping, all the ghouls but him and Rain. He himself was too lazy and Rain said they weren’t interested in going the day before, still sleeping when the group went out. When they did wake up, though, and stumbled into the common room where Swiss was watching TV half asleep, his blood ran cold.

Rain woke up little, apparently, or rather didn’t wake up big, as they regressed the day before. Swiss hadn’t thought about that when he realised he’d have a whole day alone with the water ghoul. What in the name of Satan was he supposed to do?

First, he let Rain glue themself to his warm body with a quiet purr, then scrambled to call Aether, “A- Aether, hell, Rain’s still small, what the fuck do I do, I’ve never-”

“Hey, Swiss, calm down, first of all,” the quintessence ghoul’s voice sounded through the cranky phone speaker, “You’ll be fine, you know what to do.”

“No, no, I’ve never took care of them, I just fool around and make them laugh when needed but I can’t actually-”

“Swiss!” Aether yelled into the phone, making the other shut up for a moment. “You’ll both be fine. You know what to do when they dislocate something and you know how to treat them when little. You really will be fine. You can text me or Lus if something comes up, but you’ll do great on your own.”

“I… okay, I’ll do my best,” he stuttered, Rain nuzzling into his chest as if confirming they believed in him.

“You’ll do great,” Aether repeated, and he hung up.

“Okay,” Swiss sighed to himself, dropping the phone, “I can totally do this.”

For the better part of the day he was actually doing great. There were moments when the multi ghoul was scared he royally messed up, to only be put on the verge of passing out of relief when Rain giggled instead of bursting into tears. Fortunately, at least their joints had a good day, the water ghoul moving around with no trouble with nothing but one of their special forearm crutches. 

After succeeding in talking Rain into eating lunch without making them cry (what Swiss considered a huge victory, thank you very much), they went out into the garden. At first the water ghoul laid down with their head in Swiss’ lap, eyes closed as his claws scratched at their scalp. It was already afternoon, the rest should be back soon, and Swiss was tempted to say he made it.

Unless, he didn’t.

Out of nowhere, Rain shot up, startling Swiss, who nearly fell asleep with all the stress taking care of the little ghoul brought, “Swissy, look what I can do!”

“Guppy, what do you mean?” he asked, all panicky, scrambling up after the water ghoul. “Kiddo, please be careful, don’t hurt yourself…”

Swiss had no idea what Rain wanted to so proudly show him until it was too late to stop them. With a smile on their face they put their arms up in the air and then folded in half and did a cartwheel. 

Or rather half of it, as one of their wrists dislocated with all the pressure put on it with a crack Swiss flinched at before rushing to their side, fear making him sweat.

“Oh, kiddo, are you-” he didn’t get a chance to finish before Rain burst into tears sitting on the grass. He gathered the ghoul up into his arms, watchful of the injured wrist as they sobbed into his shoulder, “Shhh, it’s okay, does it hurt much?”

Rain didn’t answer, just kept making the saddest little hurt kitten-like noises that tore Swiss’ heart to pieces. He thought the accident may have made them regress even more, Aether said that it sometimes happened with their pain.

He tried whispering soothing words and offering calming touches but Rain was still crying and shaking so hard, choking on air and their own tears. The multi ghoul nearly started wailing himself, so lost and scared. He managed to dig out his phone, calling Aether with shaky hands.

“We’re on our way back, an hour or so left,” he said, not giving the multi ghoul a chance to say a word, “Swiss, you’re fine, just put on the TV, it’ll keep them busy and-”

“A- Aeth, they- I messed up, they did a- shit- a cartwheel, and-”

“THEY DID WHAT!?”

“P- please don’t be mad, yell at me later,” Swiss pleaded, his voice actually breaking, “just please, please, tell me what to do, they won’t stop crying and I can’t-”

“I’m not mad, first of all,” Aether said, trying to sound as calm as he could, but it’s be a lie if he said he wasn’t getting worried himself. “Second of all, are they hurt?”

“I- I think something happened to their wrist,” Swiss whined, rocking himself and Rain in his arms back and forth, “but they won’t speak, they’re just making these… shit, I don’t know, Aeth.”

“These crying kit noises?” the quintessence ghoul asked.

“Yes! Yes, w- what does it mean, what do I do?”

“They regressed more, that’s it,” Aether explained, now Swiss’ turn to let out a pathetic noise. “But you’re still fine, they’re just smaller and won’t speak, you got it.”

“Fuck, Aeth, can’t you speak to them, they call you mama!? Or Lus? I don’t know- hell, just tell me what to do!” the multi ghoul practically yelled, his heart constricting painfully when the volume made Rain, already shaking like a leaf and choking on snot, flinch. “Shit, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, guppy.”

“Don’t apologise, but talk to them like that,” Aether said, ignoring Swiss’ question. “Put me on speaker, for you, and focus on Rain.”

Swiss obeyed, placing his phone on the grass and wrapping both of his arms around Rain, speaking softly into their ear.

“Shhh, kiddo, you’re okay. It’s fine, Rainy,” if Swiss was being honest, he was talking as much to Rain as to himself, “I’ve got you, it’s okay, my guppy. Everything’s fine.”

“Good,” Aether's voice sounded again. “Now, I need you to pull on your quintessence a bit.”

“What? No, I- I don’t think I can-” the multi ghoul panicked again.

“You can,” the other reassured, “all you have to do is feel around if the pain is so bad they’re crying that hard, or it’s something else.”

“Okay, I… I think I can try,” Swiss swallowed audibly, shutting his eyes and taking a deep breath. He wasn’t bad with the little amount of quintessence power he had, but in his current state he doubted himself more than ever. Still, he focused and tried to feel what Rain was feeling. 

“I- I don’t think there’s much pain, Aeth,” he whispered, digging a bit deeper. “I think there’s something like… shame? Embarrassment? But that can’t be right, right?”

“I think it is,” the quintessence ghoul chuckled, making Swiss furrow his brows at his reaction. What the hell was so funny? “I assume they wanted to show off, yeah?”

“Yeah…”

“And they failed, in their opinion, at least. Rain’s just embarrassed, Swiss. And very little, that’s what with all the tears.”

“Oh…”

“Exactly,” Aether sighed. “So just talk them out of the shame, you can do it. We’ll be there soon.”

“Aeth, wait I- ass,” Swiss spat as the call was hung up again. “Rain? Rainy, guppy, I need you to listen to me.”

He didn’t expect an answer, but did get a whine that could be considered one, in return.

“Kiddo, I’m so proud of you, you’re so brave,” he started, feeling like he was failing at finding appropriate words. “My guppy, that was such a cool trick. And you did it all on your own, without your crutches. I’m so proud of you, Rainy.”

Swiss had no idea what he was even talking about, just repeating all of that over and over again until he was stopped by Rain lifting their head from his shoulder. They looked up at him with a face all red and splotchy, snot and tears running down their cheeks, eyes still so very wet. There was a silent question in their sad gaze.

“I am, Rainy, so proud of you, always,” Swiss assured once again, wiping the water ghoul’s cheeks with his thumbs. They leaned into the touch, the smallest hint of a purr bubbling in their chest. The multi ghoul nearly cried from relief. “Let’s get back inside, yeah? Your mamas should be here soon, we can go watch TV and wait for them, what do you say?”

Rain nuzzled further into Swiss’ warm (and sweaty) palm, nodding with a quiet chirp. The multi ghoul let out a shuddering breath as he readjusted his hold on them and braced himself to get up. He swayed a little, his legs having kind of fallen asleep with their position from moments before. 

But they made it back into the common room, Swiss not letting go of Rain as they were holding onto the bigger ghoul like a koala to a tree. He turned the TV on and plopped them both down on the couch. Swiss was half sitting against the back of it and Rain had curled up by his side with their head on his chest so they could still see the TV.

Their breathing slowed to a nearly normal pace, Swiss made them blow their nose on their way back, too, and the tears weren’t falling anymore. It was good, it was really good, Swiss was so relieved. 

He checked his phone, counting how much time had passed since Aether said it’d be an hour, they should be back fifteen minutes from now.

Swiss sighed deeply, holding Rain close and forcing a soothing purr out of his chest. The water ghoul seemed to like that, they snuggled in closer. Swiss closed his eyes and threw his head back onto the cushions, allowing himself to now try to calm down himself, when Rain already did.

When Aether and the rest got back, he and Cumulus were the first to run around the ghouls’ den looking for Rain and Swiss, especially worried with how the latter didn’t pick up their last few calls.

The quintessence ghoul leaned against the common room door frame with a relieved sigh, Cumulus joining him soon enough. Both Swiss and Rain were passed out on the couch, purring happily and nearly drowning out the quiet buzz of the still running TV.

Aether smirked, looking down at the air ghoulette to see a matching expression on her face. They were little Rain’s mamas, but apparently Swiss would earn his own caregiver nickname soon enough.