#i also get to talk about sex workers which thank GOD.

[whimsicmimic]

cant wait to roll up into class with my presentation on radfem theory like hiiiiiii yaaaalllllllllll do not assume i subscribe to Any of these beliefs. as a matter of fact we’re actually gonna dedicate half of the allotted time talking about how normalization of radfem ideology in mainstream dialogue regarding gender has lead to So Much Hate Speech. Just So Much Hate Speech.

[amostimprobabledream]

Stardust in my eyes (Homelander x Reader)

Also available on Ao3: stardust in my eyes - UnluckyAmulet - The Boys (TV 2019) [Archive of Our Own]

Sometimes, working for Vought just gets to be too goddamn much. Which is why that fateful day, you and a couple of friends had gone to get lunch and in the corner of the canteen for worker bee drones, things went from gossiping about random drama between colleagues to playing an oldie but goldie. You and your friend Claire had been playing Smash or Pass for the past ten minutes and you'd gone through damn nearly every person you knew at work. Obviously, it was all good fun, and you were being careful not to be too loud about it, but as you picked at your lunch, Claire decided to up the ante a bit. Now, it was Smash or Pass: Supe edition. Specifically, you were talking about the Seven. You’d already done A-train and Starlight, both of which you’d said Pass to, while Claire said Smash to both. "Okay, so how about...The Deep?" she said. You made a face. "Ew. Pass." "How come?" "Firstly, he smells of fish.” You say, slurping on your drink. “Like, constantly. Secondly, I heard a rumour he made an intern cry because he was rubbing his crotch against her ass on the elevator ride up, so yeah, no. If I wanted a fucking creep, I could go to any dive bar in the city." “Ew, I didn’t know that last thing.” Claire says, making a face. “Okay, fine, I’m changing my answer to pass too.” You snort, and she points at you. “Hey, don’t judge me! It’s not my fault you’re so picky you’ve said no to like everyone.” "I'm not picky, I'm selective." you counter. "It's not my fault you'd let the Seven pass you around like a Christmas present." Claire scoffs but she can't argue - she's said Smash to way more people than you have, not just Supes or co-workers. "Queen Maeve?" "Pass." "What?!" Claire shrieks. "Why?!" "Because unlike you, I don't have a mommy kink." you say, rolling your eyes. "I dunno, she's not my type. Plus, she always acts so damn bored by everything - she'd probably just expect you to get her off and then kick you out of bed and play fucking Candy Crush or something. No thanks, I don't want to do all the hard work." "Okay, okay...what about Homelander?" You pause.

Okay, that one isn't quite so simple. The Deep, A-Train, Starlight and Queen Maeve were all a fairly straightforward "no" and you haven't gotten to Black Noir yet, but somehow the answer eludes you. Homelander seems so far removed from normal human with their normal, squishy desires that it's difficult to even imagine having sex with him. You're sure you've never seen him out of that costume of his, either. But you're definitely considering it... "You're taking way too long to answer~" Claire singsongs. "Don’t tell me you’ve got a boner for that sexy cape?” "Firstly, shut up. And secondly, yeah, okay, he's attractive but like..." you paused as you try to organise your thoughts, wondering what made you hesitate, except for the whole 'Almighty symbol of America who can shoot lasers from his eyes' thing. "I kinda feel like I'd be getting it on with someone's dad?" You had no idea how old Homelander was, only that he was definitely older than you. Plus, there was his vaguely patriarchal vibe when he addressed the adoring public, like he was steering them onto the right path or something. Not that you exactly opposed to sleeping with older men, per se, but you’d prefer to know how much older somebody was first.

"Yeah, I know what you mean," Claire says thoughtfully, chewing on her sandwich as you both stand up to toss your wrappers away and get back to work. “There’s something a little fake about him. And he probably says ‘God bless America’ when he comes or something.” You nearly spit out the last of your soda, and bubbles go up your nose, which makes you hack and cough from an effort of not cackling, pounding your fist on your chest. “Fucking hell, you’re the worst!” you say, giving her arm a playful shove. She smirks and shrugs. “Just being honest. Anyway, we’re not done playing yet. Black Noir?" You think about it. "Smash." ~ You were about to head back to your desk with Claire when Ashley suddenly comes clacking up to you both with her usual harried expression on her face. Some days you feel like she's maybe a hair's breadth away from having a nervous breakdown, and you'd nearly feel bad for her if she wasn't so annoying. You can't pretend you haven't seen her, either, because she calls your name. You make a face at Claire, then turn to Ashley as she approaches. "Hey! I'm glad I caught you. Listen, the Seven have a meeting later on this afternoon but I don’t have time to put their itinerary in the meeting room, can you do it and just make sure everything looks presentable before then?” You suppress the flicker of irritation - what do you look like, a Janitor? "Uh, sure, I guess. It's just the desks, right?" "Yeah, everything else has been taken care of!" Ashley says, looking a little calmer at confirming that nearly every other matter is all perfectly sorted and pencilled into her little schedule. "Thanks so much!" She goes clicking off and you exchange a confused glance with Claire. "That was weird. Why did she ask you specifically?" Claire said. "I have no idea, but at least it'll only take me like five minutes." you sigh. "I'll be back soon." ~

The conference room is so fucking big that you take a second to just stand there and gawk at the panoramic view of the city through the windows, before you snap to attention. You don't want to linger in here - even if you're just here to straighten up the table before the Supes get here for whatever big important meeting they have. You still think it's weird Ashley told you to do it, and it feels even odder to be in here alone. Like you're trespassing. "Let's just get this over with..." you mutter to yourself, crossing the room and beginning to put the piles of papers on each table, starting from Starlight's seat and working your way around. After a few minutes you relax. It's even a little nice, getting a couple of moments away from everyone else. Vought is a massive office building but there's nowhere to be really alone - people are always sneaking out the fire escapes for a smoke, the toilets have gossiping employees, the canteen full of people with differing lunch shifts, etc. There's always a buzz, always endless humming in the background. You've compared the place to a beehive before for good reason. You're just about done, wondering if by doing this, Ashley was testing you or something - maybe she wanted to see you could be trusted in here, and now you've basically finished, you've passed and she might think about putting in a good word for you to the higher-ups, when a voice damn near give you a heart attack: "Lost in thought?" You shriek and drop the handful of papers you were holding. When you look around, the Homelander is standing there. You didn't even hear him come in. For a minute you're so startled you just stare at him - it's like seeing a snow leopard, something impossibly exotic and rare, and the fact he's even talking to you is even more of a surprise. Your heart is pounding loudly in your chest, and you wonder if he can hear it - he's smiling like you've just told a good joke. "Oh, Homelander!" you say, because it's what he tells all the staff they should call him, pressing a hand to your chest. "You scared me. Um, I can leave, I'm pretty much done here." His familiar smile only widens, and he gestures with a flick of his wrist. "Don't let me stop you. Might as well finish up what you came to do, right?" You awkwardly smile in response, unsure of what else to say, and go to grab the papers you dropped, blood rushing through your ears. You're hyperaware of him in the room, where he rightfully belongs, while you just wound up here because Ashley needed somebody to do some last-second grunt work. When you put the stack of files on Black Noir's desk and pointlessly straighten them, Homelander speaks again, pacing a little closer. "You know...you should probably be a little more careful about what you talk about with your friends while you're in the building." You freeze. Oh shit. "I mean...I guess you had no way of knowing who was listening, but...well, let's just say, it was pretty hard not to tune in, you know?" Oh my god. You went to melt through the floor. You straighten up to watch Homelander, who has an expression that's slightly chiding but amused, like you're a little kid who's learned a new swear word or something. He doesn't seem angry, but the thought he overheard you and Claire paying fucking Smash or Pass is enough to ignite your anxiety like a spark to gunpowder. "I-"

"I gotta say, you're not wrong about The Deep - he does fucking stink of fish," Homelander says conspiratorially. "Your little friend didn't seem to mind that, but she said Smash to nearly everyone. You though - you didn't seem interested in anyone besides Black Noir - I'll have to let him know, I don't think he's seeing anyone right now. Though who fucking knows, with that guy?" You feel like it's probably not the time to point out you did also admit you thought he was hot. You've got to do some damage control, here. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean - I wouldn't have said that if I didn't think it was being overheard." you blurt out hurriedly. This is a disaster. You want to strangle Claire, the fucking game was her dumb idea in the first place, she's the one who should be getting told off by Homelander, not you! "It- it was just a stupid game to pass the time." He cocks his head. "Was it?"

"I mean...it's not like...you're not..." you say, babbling like a fucking lunatic, doing anything you can to backpedal out of this. This has to be a dream - a fucked-up one. "You guys are Supes, so it's a totally moot point anyway! I-You- you were dating Queen Maeve until recently, right? It's not like you'd want to...I mean, we're just normal people and you're..." "Oh, I don't know about that." Homelander says, his tone almost jaunty, stepping a little closer. His hands are tucked behind his back, which makes you nervous, because you can't tell what he's going to do with them. "Let's see what we're working with here. Turn around." "What?" you splutter. "Go on." Homelander says, making a circular motion with his finger. "Do a spin for me." You feel queasy, like you need to go pop an antacid tablet, but what can you do? If he wanted to, he could well have you fired. Or chased out of town. Or maybe even deported. Who knows? You'd probably deserve it, to be honest - what the hell were you thinking, letting Claire rope you into that stupid Smash or Pass game?! Of course, you had no idea he was in the building at the time and could hear you, but still! Slowly you turn all the way around, aware of Homelander's eyes on you the entire time, heart pounding in your chest. When you turn back to him, his head is tilted slightly, mouth parted like he was about to say something. "Huh." was all that came out.

You had to bite the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from demanding to know what 'huh' means. Unfortunately for you, he decides to share. "You know...the dress code for you people isn't very flattering, is it?" he muses. "I hadn't thought about it before. But you...huh. I think you've got a lot more going on under there." He gestures at you, a kind of 'go on' hand movement. "Take it off." It's not a suggestion, it's an order. A command. Your face prickles with shame, unable to quite grasp this is actually happening to you. And from Homelander - Mr. America himself. You're naive to be so shocked - around here, he may get treated like a god, but he's still just a man. "Go on." Homelander says, smiling, and you can't stop looking at those prominent canines. "Show me." You can't procrastinate further, lest he get impatient enough to strip you himself, or even worse, laser off your clothes or something. He probably wouldn't be overly bothered if he scorched your skin too, and the thought makes you sick. He could just use his X-ray vision if he wanted to, but that's not what this is. This is a punishment and you'd be stupid to make it any worse for yourself. You'll be lucky if you walk out of this room with your job. Your fingers shake as you unbutton your shirt and you keep peeking anxious glances at Homelander, but it's impossible to read his mood just by looking at him - his expression could be anything, bored or annoyed or merely waiting. It's eerie. He says nothing as you drop your shirt on the ground - you don't quite dare put it on the table or one of the chairs, so you're just grateful you know for a fact the floor has been vacuumed recently. But you can feel his never-wavering gaze on you like a weight as you keep going. You're down to your underwear and bend down to unzip your boots when he finally says something. "No, leave those."

You straighten up hurriedly, even though you really don't want to. This is beyond humiliating - America's golden boy is seeing you in just a bra and panties, for fuck's sake. They don't even match. Your face is burning and a squirming sensation writhes in the pit of your stomach, like you're about to pass out or puke or both. Homelander prowls around you like a lion, taking in everything from all angles, and you have to ball your hands into fists to stop yourself from covering yourself with your arms. You don't think you've ever felt so naked before, even if you're still technically clothed. His boots click as he comes to a stop right behind you. "You're shaking." Homelander mocks you, his breath hot on your neck. You can feel the heat of him right behind you, like you're standing right in front of a sun lamp. "Yeah," you say in one breath, even though you didn't think he was looking for a verbal response. He spins you around to face him, his grip bruisingly strong on your upper arms. He's smiling like he's won something, and his eyes slide down to your tits, eyelashes casting tiny shadows across his cheeks. "Yeah," he says softly, more to himself than you. "I'd fuck you." The words barely have time to register in your shellshocked brain before he's on you. His hand tangles in your hair to jerk your head back and you let out a squeak of pain, but it's muffled by his mouth on your, hot and vicious and unyielding. There's nothing tender about the kiss - he kisses you like he wants to devour you, a growl in the back of his throat that honest-to-god make your knees buckle. He's not shy about feeling you up either, hands roaming over your body like it’s a toy that he’s just ripped the wrapping paper off of, manhandling you however he wants and all you can really do is go with it, heart pounding like a goddamn jackhammer. This has gotten so out of hand so quickly that it’s dizzying trying to make sense of any of it. …So why is a little part of you enjoying this? Just why is there a wet patch pooling at the crotch of your panties and your skin erupting in tingles wherever he touches you? He snaps your bra open, ruining the clasp, and wastes no time in fondling your tits, the material dragging over your sensitive skin breaking them out in goosebumps. They’re fucking soft against his palms, hands that have killed, killed and killed again, but here he is massaging your tits like they’re priceless objects. He lowers his face and runs his tongue over them, and you nearly collapse right then and there – it’s like a fucking livewire pressed straight to your skin. He hums in approval at how responsive you are, teasing your nipples with the pads of his thumbs. Apparently Homelander is a tits guy – that’s definitely never come up in any interviews before. Why are you finding yourself so fucking humiliated and wanting him to do more? Knowing you can’t do anything to stop him? Homelander pulls back for air and slowly swipes his tongue across his bottom lip – the taste of your lipgloss lingers, something sweet that makes him hard, dick pressing against his suit. You stare back at him, caught in the fragile place between lust and disgust. He likes that look on you, hair all messed up, pupils blown wide until there’s barely any iris left, just a thin circle of colour wrapped around blackness, and your lips look red-raw and swollen from his rough mouth. He smirks. “Don’t tell me you’re enjoying this,” he teases, sliding a hand down to your hip and squeezing. “You like getting ordered around, huh? Like being told what to do?” He doesn’t give you time to confirm or deny it – a second later he’s casually shoving his hand into your underwear, smirking as your mouth drops open in disbelief, his fingertips teasing against your slit. It drives a moan from your mouth, and he grins, holding you in place with his free hand, like he knows you’re tempted to bolt.

“You’re so fuckin’ wet,” he hisses, plunging his fingers deeper inside your cunt and you gasp, making a pointless grab at his arm – to steady yourself, to get your bearings, you don’t know. “I think you were lying before – Pass, my ass. I’ve barely touched you and you’re soaked. Do you go home and fuck yourself thinking about me?”

“Homelander…” you moan, you can’t help it. Your head is swimming and his fingers are so thick and he’s relentless, pushing and pushing you without a care in the world about what might happen. Whether it’ll break you or not.

“Go on,” he whispers, working his fingers in and out of you, clamping you to his chest with an arm around your back so he can watch the emotions flashing across your face like his own personal picture show. “Say my name.” “Nn- Homelander!” “Louder.” “Homelander!” And then, as it starts to get fucking unbearable, the intoxicating fog blanketing your brain rendering you unable to concentrate on anything else, when you’re gonna fucking cum all over his fingers, he stops. Pulls his hand free. Your expression drops, surprise and outrage making your eyes snap to him. “Wha-?” “Didn’t think it’d be that easy, did you?” he all but purrs, clearly taking deep amusement in your bewilderment. “You fucking desperate little slut. You’ll come with I say you can.” He makes a show of wiping his slick-coated glove off on the back of The Deep’s chair, before he looks back down at you and something in his gaze makes you stand stock-still, a classic prey response to being stared at by a predator. “Now,” he says, and there’s no forced geniality in his voice anymore, his tone not far away from being a growl. “What was it I said a minute ago?”

Oh, jesus christ. You think, which you’re pretty sure wasn’t what he was aiming for. “Aah, yeah, I remember now,” he says, nodding. “I said I’d fuck you.” The room spins as he abruptly grabs you and aggressively turns you round, and next thing you know you’re bent forwards over the very desk you’d just spent the last fifteen minutes tidying – he only needs one hand pressing down on your back to hold you down. You hear his ragged breathing and the sound of his belt being loosened, and you squeak as he yanks down your underwear like he’s personally offended by them – you’re sure you hear something rip – and he’s back against you, so hot it’s like a furnace and oh shit, wait, he’s going in raw?! You grab pointlessly at what’s in front of you, papers crumpling in your sweaty fists. He does not go gentle as he thrusts into you and all you can do is make a strangulated keening noise – he’s so thick, filling you up and stretching you out. You bury your face into your forearms, muffling your gasps and squeaking against your skin because the noises he’s driving from you are making you want to combust with embarrassment. Not that he can’t hear them anyway – he’s made the fact he has superhearing more than plain, after all. But he can’t help finding it endearing you’d even bother to try hiding it – like anybody would dare walk in and interrupt him right now. Not after he specifically told Ashley to keep everyone away from the meeting room while he dealt with you. “Fuck, you’re tight…” Homelander growls as he thrusts into you, his own words being drowned out by moaning of his own. “So fuckin’…” You stare at the doors across from you, terrified somebody’s going to come in and see you like this, getting fucked by Homelander like a bitch in heat – he hasn’t even taken off his gloves but here you are, only the straps of your bra and a pair of over-the-knee boots covering you. Homelander removes the hand from your back and grips your hips with enough force that you yelp in pain – it’s nothing close to what he could really do, but you know you’re going to have hand-shaped marks there later. Not that you care much with how he’s fucking you with total abandon now, and each stroke of his cock drives you closer and closer to your breaking point and you cling onto the table with one hand like it’s going to help you somehow. “Still feel like you’re fuckin’ someone’s dad?” Homelander taunts you as his thrusts start to get sloppier, more erratic, and you groan to have your words thrown back at you. “No, no, Homelander, I- “ He pinches your clit and rolls it between his fingertips, and you keen out loud, nearly sobbing with pleasure and pain at the same time. Your head is buzzing with the stimulation, trapped between so many sensations, terror of getting caught, of getting so close to relief, panic that he’ll go too far and break something, of what he’ll do with you when he’s finished… “No, no,” he chides you, clicking his tongue like you’ve given him the wrong answer in a quiz. “Call me daddy, if that’s how you see me.” Is he serious? You have no idea if he means it or if he’s just being a bastard, but a particularly hard thrust that actually nudges both you and the table forwards has you saying it anyway, babbling like a lunatic. “Sorry- agh- daddy, fuck, that feels so good-!” “Thassit…nnh…I’m gonna…fuck you full of my cum…” he pants and it sends a bizarre buzz of pride through you that you managed to make a Supe short of breath. “And you’re gonna take all of it, aren’t you? Take all of my cum…”

Like you have a choice, since he didn’t bother to put any protection on. But you’re too lost in your own orgasm to care, the force of it rendering you utterly blissed out, too busy riding that glorious, tingling high to care much about anything else going on, even if you can’t ignore the hot, sticky flood as he comes, and fuck there’s so much of it, how are you going to go back to work like this?? Homelander makes a sound between a groan and a snarl as he comes and you know you’ll be hearing that noise in your dreams.

Finally, it stops. For a moment neither of you move or speak, except for panting breaths, and you want to look behind you to see what mood he’s in now, but you don’t quite dare. He moves away and you slump onto the floor, because you’d really rather not have your naked ass just there on display across the table. You feel blindly across the floor for your skirt and tug it on as Homelander tucks himself back into his suit and sniffs once, swiping a hand through his hair. You can’t find your fucking underwear, you realise with a stab of panic – he must have literally ripped them straight off you, so you wouldn’t be able to put them back on anyway, so you just shove your arms through your shirt and try in vain to button it with trembling fingers.

“Tell Ashley the room’s ready now,” Homelander says, and his voice is impersonal, like he’s done nothing more than take care of some trivial order of business. You can only nod and get to your feet, wobbly as a newborn deer. Homelander smirks as he watches you from the side of his eye, you look so pathetic and off-balance he’s almost tempted to fuck you again, but he does have work to get back to. You’re off the hook – for now. When you get to the doors, you pause and look back at him. It would probably be better to just leave with whatever semblance of dignity you still have intact, but you have to ask him.

"Um...do I... I mean like...I still have a job, right?" you hedge nervously. "What?" Homelander glances over at you laughs, like this is the most ridiculous thing he's ever heard. "Did you think I was going to hand you your fucking notice?" Yes? No? You had no idea what he was going to do. But you just shrug, because it seems safer than speaking. He scoffs and gives his head a shake, but his gaze drags down your body and your stomach clenches again, despite what’s just happened. “Run along and get back to work like a good girl,” he says softly, but loud enough you can hear every word just fine. “I think we’ll be seeing each other again real soon.” You can’t muster a response to that, so you just nod and hurry out, trying your utmost not to break into a run, lest he be tempted to give chase. You pass a mirror on your way down the corridor and the sight makes you freeze. You look like you’ve been mauled by a wild animal, and you can smell Homelander’s cologne all over you. You probably reek of sex. You’re not sure how far that is from the truth, to be honest. Hopefully you can make it to the toilets on this floor without anybody seeing you and tidy yourself up a bit – you can’t go back to your desk like this. And you can only hope to god nobody finds your discarded panties in there because Ashley would likely figure out how and why they got there. At least I still have my job. You think, even if you know it will never be the same now – you’ll never be able to look at Homelander, or any of his posters or action figures or T-shirts – without thinking about his hands on you, of him watching you strip with that hungry look on his face, ever again. Maybe it will fade in time, maybe not. Maybe Homelander has fucked half the people in the building on equally flimsy pretenses, or you could be the first time he’s indulged himself like this. He might forget all about you, or you could forever be known as ‘that mouthy assistant I fucked once’. You have no idea.

And that’s maybe the scariest thing of all – not knowing what comes next. ~ Meanwhile, Homelander stands in the meeting room, awaiting the rest of the Seven to enter. In his hand he toys with the now-ruined pair of underwear you’d had on earlier – you were so fucked out you hadn’t even him notice him swipe them off the floor. He’ll hang onto them as a…souvenir, if you will.

His superhearing picks up the sounds of the others approaching, and he turns, plastering on a smile as he approaches his desk. A tongue swipes across his bottom lip, a lingering taste of that sweet flavour – cinnamon or butterscotch, something that reminds him of dessert – only sealing your fate further.

After all, when you get a taste of something like that, why wouldn’t you go back for a second bite?

[shallowseeker]

I just wanted to say that I love how you talk about John? I noticed in the scene where Cas is resurrected, there's not only a coffin in the background but a deer head with horns. Do you think that this is a John motif? The absent father.

Thank you. I think people have warmed to my John fascination, maybe.

I'm not SUPER fresh on this motif in my head, but thank you for pointing this out... think I'll watch for this symbol more often now.

//

So, yeah. You're right! I think this ep (5x01) is one of the earliest times Cas gets flanked by the horned God symbol... I agree it's a John motif, though this is by no means a symbol unique to John.

I think its appearance here dovetails nicely with Cas's enhanced expectations post-Fall (like healing Bobby, for example).

///

Re: horned symbols.

I think most of the characters get associated with this horned-God symbol at various times, especially the hunters when they're hunting.

If memory serves, there are a lot of ram horns, deer horns, goat horns, bull amulets, sitting on bull couches (99 Problems & Tombstone come to mind).

///

But I can think of a few instances where Cas gets flanked very prominently with father-god-horns. Even when he's feeling pretty powerless, like in Reading is Fundamental.

///

Cas also seems prominently associated with Foreign Gods at times, perhaps because, at heart, he is a "Protector from a different family," like a Spouse.

Cas's Buddhist symbols fit nicely with the idea of a "Prince Deciding to Fall into Lower Class/Mortality."

///

But horns.

We see John with father-horns when he's watching over Sam and Dean in s1:

John even has other motifs of protectorship, like THE CHAIR. He sits in this chair as his family sleeps, watchful to the point of unhinged paranoia.

///

But the idealized father-God is supposed to worship and protect the family he loves, not become a Tyrant. He should be a Servant, nourishing the family and adoring/worshipping the ones he's supposed to protect.

(Which is sort of... the whole deal with the angels and their mission, really.)

HESTER: When Castiel first laid a hand on you in Hell, he was lost! For that, you're going to pay. HESTER walks towards DEAN, intending to KILL. Cas gets in between HESTER and DEAN. CASTIEL: Please. They're the ones we were put here to protect.

Or even Naomi: "Our mission was to protect what God created. I don't know when we forgot that."

///

He should be willing to bleed for them, not just demand their blood for the Greater Good/War Effort.

VS.

(Think of Aslan in C.S. Lewis's stories, letting his mane be shaved to protect his loved ones. That's the ideal.)

///

As for absent fathers. Yes, I think that swirls around John and the horned-god symbols. Of course.

And yeah, the absent father-protector motif works for Cas a lot too. But my fave motif for Cas is actually the concept of the mythological Artifical Husband. This is the husband who springs from the Cosmic world to step in and carry out "Fatherly" duties in the New Household.

Cas's coat represents the artificial materials that he sprung from, also representing the role Dean wants him to live with him as. (Note: Dean wasn't alone in this. Cas really zones in on the co-Father role in 10 and beyond.)

There are Russian tales I like for this, too - I like the idea of Cas's overcoat representing his and Dan's mutual longing FOR a spouse,. The coat embodies both the idea of the Artificial Husband and the royal/kingly/soldierly/spousal nature of Cas's motifs.

At first, the Artificial Husband is "not real," but he "becomes real" through the mortal's longing for him, causing him to undergo a transformational change. ("You changed me, Dean.")

The Artificial/Divine Husband undergoes a "Civilizing Process" initiated by the Mortal Spouse, and that's how he becomes a proper Cosmic Spouse. (Cheekily, this is why Chastity the sex worker was named Chastity. Aside// I think too of Enkidu/wildman becoming Civilized through sex with a sex priestess in Epic of Gilgamesh. The idea of mortal = virginity has perhaps become warped over time because there's some evidence to suggest that it wasn't rooted in "being untouched" so much as it was about youth/growth/new experiences/springtime.")

Cas becomes "more human" through his connection to Dean. We see this with the mark of the handprint representing humanity.

///

Cas also embodies the Animal Bridgegroom. This motif comes across as early as Pamela, who gets her eyes burnt out because she can't look at Cas.

I think it even works in s6, when Bobby and Sam urge Dean to reveal Cas's true nature and mechanations, ultimately culminating in them working with Death to kill Cas.

Then Cas becomes the Lost Husband, fleeing from Dean, and Dean has to go through many Purgatory trials and seek out new supernatural allies in order to reach him.

"When Cas first laid on a hand on you in Hell, he was Lost!"

Cas gets Lost a lot. Lost in battle, lost in war, lost in paranoia and overprotective overpreparedness, dead again, lost memory, lost sanity...

Don't even get me started on how "recognizing each other" and "amnesia" swirl around Dean-Cas with regard to the divinity-humanity marriage motif. Or how Dean's dubious consent loss/loss of free will/inhibitions gets him spirited away by Hell-Kings and Cosmic Darknesses.

So, yeah, I think there's a lot of mileage for Cas as "absent father," but there's even more mileage for him as the Lost Husband.

[bewilderedbunny]

Weedman (Eddie x Reader fluff) 18+only!

This was originally going to be smut but I got distracted by the idea of flirting with Eddie while he makes bad jokes. Just over 800 words, no pronouns are used for reader.

Warnings: Lots of drug use talk, reader's mom speaks of food in a negative way, there's a joke about sex work but it isn't at any sex-workers' expense (it's just Eddie being silly) reader is a stressed out college student, I think that's all.

*I also wanted to mention, I did not come up with the joke Eddie makes at the beginning of the phone call, it's just something I've heard around and I'm not sure where it originates from

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Part 2 is here

You had just finished exams for your Junior year of college and you were drained. Normally, you would stay in the city while working for the summer, but this year you decided to take a break and go back home to stay with your family. You had hoped this time off would provide some much-needed relaxation. Speaking of relaxation, you had become a bit of a pothead while away from home. The amount of weight that magic little flower would lift from your shoulders was incredible. You hadn't smoked in high school, but you remembered the local dealer at the time. "Reefer Rick" how could you forget a name like that? Unluckily for you, Rick was picked up last month and wouldn't be out until your break was long over.

You thought this may be for the best. You had been smoking pretty regularly to help alleviate the stress of school, maybe a tolerance break could help reset your nerves. Then that night your mom asked if you were really going to have dessert since you already had a roll with dinner. You realized weed might not be enough to get you through this break. Maybe horse tranquilizers or a lobotomy would do the job.

After dessert, which you savored every bite of, you went to your room and decided to try to find a new supplier. After a few unhelpful phone calls consisting of people reminiscing about high school (how could these people miss hell so much?), you decided to call Robert Swan. He was a friend of a friend who seemed to know just about everything about everyone in Hawkins. Robert let you know that Rick had someone dealing underneath him.

"Huh, I never took Rick for the "management" type."

"Well, he's not exactly running a Burger King but yeah, he's making his way up. Oh my god, did you hear about-"

Robert rambled to you, gossiping about people you couldn't care enough about to remember. After "oh really?" and "no way"-ing your way through the conversation, you got the information for the dealer, thanked Robert, and said goodbye before he could trap you into listening any longer.

You sighed while looking at the paper you had written the dealer's information on. "Eddie Munson" the name was unfamiliar to you.

You dialed the number given to you and after a few rings, a man answered.

"Hawkin's mortuary, you kill 'em, we chill 'em. Would you like to make a reservation?" You took a second to process what he said before realizing the joke.

"Yes, please. Embalming table for two?"

He laughed and sounded embarrassed "Oh shit, I thought you were someone else. Sorry about that. Thanks for playing along."

"No problem. Out of curiosity, who did you think I was?"

"My uncle, he calls me on his lunches at work sometimes to check in, it's fun to mess with him, make him laugh."

"That's sweet he checks on you."

"Yeah, I guess it is." Eddie leaned against the wall twirling the phone cable with his finger.

"Oh, who is this, by the way?"

You tell him your name and how you heard about him.

"Words getting around that I'm the new go-to man, huh? Maybe I should make business cards."

You reply, "What would they say? Eddie Munson: amateur herbalist?"

He laughs and says, "Was thinking: 'Eddie Munson: Dungeon Master, Musician, Weedman, Phone Sex Operator.' Maybe add a drawing of a wizard or a dragon too."

You giggle at his silliness and say, "Don't forget to add mortician to that. How's the phone sex business treating you?"

"Not great, still haven't figured out where my dick goes in the phone." you hold your head in your hands and laugh. He laughs along with you.

You look at the clock, it's already midnight.

"I guess I should ask you about buying since that's the reason I called."

"Oh yeah. Shit, this salesman stuff is hard. How much do you want?"

"What can $50 get me?"

"$50 worth of weed."

You roll your eyes "Sounds like a deal. Can we meet tomorrow? Say 10 am?"

"10 am?! What am I, a doctor?! Who gets up at 10 am during the summer?"

You laugh and say, "Sorry, I didn't think about your beauty sleep. Please forgive me. How about 2 pm?"

"He agrees and gives you his address

"It's a date. Have a goodnight, sweetheart."

"Sweet dreams, Weedman."

Once you hang up the phone, you realize you've been bouncing your leg this entire time. You're unsure if it's from the general nerves or the fact that you've been flirting with a stranger. Was that even flirting or were the two of you just idiots? You think about tracking down your old yearbook to see if he's in there, but decide maybe it'll be better to have the mysterious Weedman's appearance be a surprise.

[waitmyturtles]

This is VERY UNLIKE ME, but here's some incredibly fast, EXTREMELY late-night meta on two dramas (Dangerous Romance and I Feel You Linger in the Air) from this TIRED mama, all before Only Friends later today!

(Y'all. I've missed being around this week! Moving and unpacking... I'll tell ya. It gets harder as I get older. Mostly because I/we have more stuff, and the BRAINS I need to figure out where this stuff should go is like, as mentally draining as it is physically draining to open boxes, unpack 'em, go up and down stairs -- damn. I have been COLLAPSING at night. Friends have been sending me meta to read -- @ranchthoughts, I see you, boo! <3 <3 The little peeks and breaks I've been getting have been giving me energy. I'm a little back on my bullshit now, and I can't wait to give Only Friends the full treatment tomorrow. But for now, quick notes!)

1) Dangerous Romance, episode 4: Listen, the friends covered a lot (here, here, and here -- @neuroticbookworm, @lurkingshan, @wen-kexing-apologist, all clowning correctly). WKA also notes that this show was written by Pratchaya Thavornthummarut and Bee Pongsate, two of the three writers of some of the best BLs ever -- Bad Buddy, My School President, Dark Blue Kiss, etc. When Bee and Pratchaya write WITHOUT Au Kornprom, as they did in BBS, MSP, and DBK -- things go a touch awry (cc @chickenstrangers, as we've talked about this before). Bee and Pratchaya, for instance, wrote Vice Versa, which I haven't watched, but I know the fam is mid on. (Remember when Aof Noppharnach had to come in to save 2gether by making Still 2gether? 2gether was written by Bee and Pratchaya -- Aof and Au joined in on the Still 2gether correction.)

ANYWAY, ALL OF THIS IS TO SAY that I should have been smarter about this show when I started in on it. It's directed in part by Lit Phadung, formerly of SOTUS, which is a fine show by nostalgia's standards! But like, not the height of drahmah.

So there's a lot of mid kinda swirling around here, and god, honestly, I'm kicking myself, because I should have been more sus. I should have been more sus!

Perth and Chimon are too good for this show. Not that I hate it! I don't hate the show, per se. It's just -- the first episode was so intense, so very issues-based, as all the dear friends noted, that to swerve towards a SUCH a gloopy romance plot was just... man, even SOTUS was WAY more clear in its plot than DR. (Dudes, I was chatting with @neuroticbookworm while I was watching this, and I was like, LOVE SICK HAD A MORE CONVINCING ROMANCE PACE THAN THIS. LOVE SICK!!!) DR is moving WAY too quickly towards the cheesiest of tropes, without the beef to back it up.

Anyway, from the energy vibes that Perth and Chimon are giving off, they should either 1) be making out by now, and/or 2) doing it by now, because like, WHOA, lots of staring, boys! LOTS of staring. And lemme tell ya, someone's staring at me like that, like in the clurb or something, and I'm like, yep, make-out time, right?! RIGHT?!

I am now officially watching this show, as I noted to @neuroticbookworm, literally to watch all the dear GMMTV celebs in here try to avoid a dumpster fire. (Where the hell is June?!) (At least Marc and Pawin are funny for like, the 10 seconds we see them.)

OH, ALSO?! What's the difference in Sailom becoming a sex worker vs. being bought out as a live-in tutor? Were we supposed to judge Sailom becoming an escort? Are we intentionally ignoring bias in socioeconomic gaps, writers? TOO MUCH TO ASK, TEAM! Too. much. to. ask.

I luv you, Perth and Chimon, I LUV YOU, BUT WHY. ANYWAY. MOVING ON.

2) I haven't written anything about I Feel You Linger in the Air yet because of LIFE (see above), and I was very wibbly about it when I started it, because you, your mother, MY mother, and MY MOTHER'S MOTHER all know about how sus I am on Tee Bundit (but I finally watched Lovely Writer and LOVED IT, so I am a touch less sus).

ANYWAY, thanks to the convincing of @lurkingshan and @neuroticbookworm to look past the slow pace of the first episode as accurate for a historical drama, I kept at it with IFYLITA. And I'm glad I did.

Now this? THIS IS A BL, BABY!

We got sexy typewriter scenes! Drawings of cutie widdle pigwets! Drunk falls! Red cheeks! Reading out loud! POETRY! FLOWERS! ENEMIES AND INTRIGUE! (I'm not happy about the marital rape, but unfortunately, I am thinking that is accurate for the time being portrayed.)

Admittedly -- god, Tee, the episodes are still a little long, my homey. A little long. BUT.

This show, as so many have noted, is just beyond gorgeous. The plumerias. I LOVE Ming and Maey. I LOVE THAT WE MAY HAVE A SAPPHIC SUB-PLOT.

But I also appreciate that only four episodes in, we haven't forgotten that this is a time travel show, in the midst of the budding romance. My thinking on that out-of-body experience on Jom's part was Jom flirting with consciousness after the present-day car crash. But who knows.

I like that Jom is making the connections with those drawings he found in that chest -- and that, lol, he was asking Prik questions about the architecture. Even though Yai's dad seems like a bad dude, I have faith that Tee Bundit is going to keep Nu Surasak going as a good BL dad/dude -- fingers crossed.

I am just -- I am loving where this show is going to go. The house is worried about Yai. I like the way the scent about Yai's preferences is a lot more muted in 1920s Thailand than it would be as set in the present-day. I just think that's totally accurate for what I would call an "old-fashioned" Asian perspective now. I'm very intrigued to see how a historical drama like this will wrestle with homophobia, as this is my first period BL, and -- I'm just excited to see where it'll go.

The acting is GREAT, the pace of the romance is GREAT, the pace of the filming is still slow, but I can't believe I'm saying this -- I'll continue to forgive it for now. Tee, please, PLEASE don't fail us, because you have something GREAT going on here. Yai, head over HEEEELLLLSSS for Jom, is just -- it's a wonder to see, and I am fully on this roller coaster palanquin ride.

(Also, hey, TWO DRAMAS where dudes were PAID to live with their crushes. K!)

(Oh, also, definitely, next time I'm at a clurb, in like, 20 years, I am definitely ordering an URN of liquor with a ladle. Like a baijiu urn. Fuck yeah. What a LOOK.)

(Okay, that's it, good night, see you for Only Friends!)

[vacantgodling]

I'd love to hear about cult of the pale moon messiah (and also gender if you wanna share) ~ @void-botanist

thank youuuuu!!

so gender is a playlist of songs that are just gender to me. i haven’t updated it in a BIT so idk how accurate some of them still are 🤔 it’s less of how i currently experience gender and more like the gender i Want to be. just something about the sounds and vibes of these songs are if i could snap my fingers and have any body and style etc i want it’d be this: (also sorry not sorry it’s all kpop)

N E WAY. cult of the pale moon messiah is a very… underdeveloped wip. it actually (surprisingly for me) came from a dream i had after reading that one writing prompts post talking about being imprisoned for 400 years or smthn and you actually live to see the full sentence. so. here’s just what i wrote down from that dream:

after being caught and tried for murder, a criminal has been sentenced to 111 years in prison. the criminal (a vampire, to which they don’t knows accepts this sentence but requests that he be provided a coffin to sleep in, and that no one provide him with food or water or anything to sustain himself and that no one check his cell for 111 years. the judge agrees, humored, and orders that a building ordinance be put up that no one shall check that cell for 111 years and the building cannot be torn down until this prisoner’s time.

the vampire enters his solitary confinement cell and is locked in the room. the vampire gets into the coffin and lulls itself to sleep.

111 years later, the town is being renovated and workers finally come down to this tomb. they have heard about the ordinance and are darkly amused to see the bones of the fool who would’ve died a horrible starving death for naught. they open the crypt and they pry open the coffin and find the vampire still fully flesh and blood laying there. the first man (older) dies of fright and the other (younger) is devoured by the now awake vampire. then, the vampire escapes.

news quickly spreads of this and though many are concerned at what the FUCK still many others flock to him and begin to worship him as a god. which is how the cult of the pale moon messiah is born.

(they still don’t know he’s a vampire btw🧍‍♂️)

basically those who tend to flock to this “messiah” are fed the lie that they will be able to become immortal by becoming one with him—so it becomes a sex cult but also a blood bag drive because basically they’re lead to believe that if they’re chosen to be drained by the messiah that they are being sent to their second life and will be reborn. a mass hysteria and frenzy over this new religion crops up and starts sending their small land into just sheer goddamn pandemonium (this story takes place in paramour’s universe btw right here

and yeah it’s very. castlevania (netflix) meets interview with a vampire’s homoeroticism because the Tension between the vampire and the mc man who comes to put a stop to this shit (him btw)

is kind of insane.

no one has names yet and it’s very just uHHHHH vibes. i’ll figure it out eventually.

there’s only 2 songs on the playlist tho bc i’m look for like. very specific blend of operatic metal like the first song or very heavy handed religious allegory but take me to church but also rocky-poppy like the second im just very picky.

[tri-pofdeath]

HI HELLO BOOKCLUB.... i have a late addition to week 1 bc i uhhh, got very sick and didnt have coherent thoughts for several days, wahoo, yippee (I am doing better now thank god) ANYWAY i wanted to talk about a couple panels I really enjoyed (one of em is technically a page but shhhh). I really love the Bad Lads story arc, especially the art in it! The designs for BDN and the Bad Lads are GREAT, every shot with the sand steamer in it is just so... awe-inspiring in such a fun way. I think it was a great first bigger story/set piece to start the manga out with tbh!

FIRST UP, this page! I was originally just going to talk about how much I liked the panel with just the sand steamer in it but I feel like its stark contrast to all of the other panels AND its placement on the page spread adds a lot. So, this takes place immediately before Vash passes out from the drugs Kaite puts in his drink, and is also before Vash has figured out Kaite is helping orchestrate the attack (supposedly), but Kaite certainly thinks he's onto him! This tension is portrayed well in the shots chosen for each of the panels- all the ones with Kaite have him avoiding eye contact and/or having his back turned to the viewer (Vash), and Vash is placed very claustrophobically in all of the panels- his face is either cut off by the borders or covered by the speech bubbles. There's also TONS of negative space here, and in comics the closest you can get to making something take Time is space on the page, so the empty space here implies it's a slow moving, uncomfortable conversation. Which makes sense! The sand steamer caught my eye because it's just... such a striking visual for How Fucking Dark it is and how isolated they are here. They're way out in the middle of nowhere, and in DANGER, and Kaite is very deeply aware of and haunted by this. It's also a HUGE panel - it takes up about 2/3 of this two page spread, which I imagine in actual book form rather than a nice digital scan, chokes out the other panels some for an even more intense claustrophobic effect. VERY COOL ALL AROUND ....

I am finding more and more on this reread that Nightow is really great at using negative space especially in how he lays out pages. In fact! There's another page in vol 1 that comes to mind for this (The bit where Vash pretends to be asleep so the sex workers sent to him leave ), that @pancake-breakfast analyzes in this post here! I recommend checking that out!

I KNOW others have posted this panel but. C'mon. This Rocks. This is like, the perfect composition for this- everything down to B.D.N.'s hat detail to Kaite's hairline is lined up perfectly, the sand steamer windows and B.D.N's Shoulder Things are framing everything so nicely, and Vash fading in from the dark is just soooo.... chefs kiss. THE DRAMA OF IT ALL!!

[lumosatnight]

Day 4: Club Veritas

James pays a visit to his favourite club.

@kinktober2023 day 4: Prostitution

Regulus/James, Unrequited Sirius/James, E, 500 words

Sex Worker Regulus, Anal Sex, Muggle AU

Note: Regulus is the brightest star in the constellation Leo.

—

James is a wealthy businessman. He likes to indulge occasionally. So sue him.

His favourite spot is Veritas over on Knockturn Alley. It’s not because of the selection, although they do have quite a range, and James has nearly tried them all. It’s also not because of its discreet location, although that never hurts either. It’s certainly not because of the club’s newest addition, a tall and angular man with flashing eyes and brooding lips. He isn’t the most talkative of fellows, but James is drawn to the similarities all the same.

Leo is his name. Well, his stage name, that is. Leo the Lion James likes to tease him, which usually gets him a bland smile in return. He wants to make the man smile for real one day, make his grey eyes dance with joy from a prank well done. Alas, maybe someday.

Today, Leo is all business — polite smiles and formal handshakes while money is being exchanged, spread legs and barely there moans while James fucks into him on hands and knees.

“You like that?” James gasps, pounding into him from behind. He quickens his pace, and Leo’s fingers tighten their grip on the sheets, the only sign he’s given that he even feels James at all. 

“Yeah, you like that. Feel so good on my cock. God, I wish I could take you home with me. I want to fuck your tight little hole every night.”

The angle is not quite right, and the hips he’s holding are just slightly too slim. He imagines broader shoulders in his partner’s place, longer hair, and a fuller smile.

“Oh, shit!” James pulls out and whips off the condom. “Turn around. Quick!”

Leo shuffles around. He sits on his heels, hands clasped behind his back, chin tilted up just the way James likes. He gazes up at James. His face is clean-shaven, a little more pointy than James would prefer, but it will do.

James comes, spurting all over Leo’s parted lips, but it’s his eyes that James stares at. Grey, grey, grey. They’re the very same grey that James sees every day but knows he can never have.

-♦️-

The office is bustling. Marauders & Co. is about to become the largest tech conglomerate in Western Europe, and the stress is slowly starting to show.

“Good weekend?” Remus calls with a knowing look, his arms laden with files.

James gives their primary financial advisor a rude hand gesture as he shuts the door to his office.

“Jamie, thank god you’re here. I need you to look at these reports.”

Sirius sits on James’s desk, smiling up at him, his long hair framing his unshaven face. James’s best friend, his business partner of nearly fifteen years. He touches the back of James’s hand, sending a bolt of electricity to his groin.

James meets his eyes, and they’re so grey grey grey. He makes a mental note to clear his calendar for tonight. He needs to make another visit to Veritas.

Also read it on AO3!

← Day 3 | Masterlist | Day 5 →

[gallavich-headcanon]

A C D G X AND Z FOR THE SPICEY HEADCANONS PLEASE!!!!

Oh my god Alicia hi!!! Okay I'm ready (The question are from here)

A. Aftercare: how do they take care of each other after sex? Do they talk? cuddle? shower? Ian loves giving Mickey soft touches, small kisses and many many words of affirmation, "You were so good for me, Mick, I love it when you trust me like that" and "You're the hottest man I know. How did I get so lucky? You don't even understand how happy you make me, baby." Mickey just needs to have some kind of physical contact, maybe putting his head on Ian's chest, touching his hand, one leg between Ian's. He just wants him close. Ian is the one that gets them water and cleans them up, firstly because if it was up to Mickey they would fall asleep covered in cum, and secondly because hearing that hoarse 'Thank you' makes him feel so happy. (He's a service top through and through)

C. Crying: " You ever make someone cry before? from ecstasy" was it with Mickey? Have Ian cried during sex? Oh it was absolutely with Mickey! I mean maybe it also happened later on with other people, but this was something that he learned he could do when he made Mickey cry from an intense orgasm. (If you ask me it happened the first time Mickey came untouched)

D.  Dirty talk: Who is more talkative during foreplay? during sex? Do they have Praising / degrading kink? I just answered Dirty talk here!

G: Gagging: We've all seen the famous Gag in their room. Who wore it? Who bought it? How was the first experience? How's their gag reflex? And Gagging here!

X. XXXXX: What's their favorite porn? what do they type into the search bar? Do they have a favorite porn star? Mickey is a size queen, so as long as there's a giant dick in the video, he is good to go. He doesn't like feminine guys in his porn, the tops don't have to be muscular but just preferably bigger than their bottom. His go to search is "Big Ginger fuck Bareback" when Ian was in the ROTC he might have had a phase of army kink. Total coincidence, though. Ian is into amateur porn, he doesn't like how sterile professional porn is. After they got married he kept searching for "Amateur married couple passionate" when they were younger he used to search stuff like "Big ass Co-worker" and "Straight College roommate" I don't think either of them have a favorite porn star, but Ian found that one amateur couple that kinda looks like them.

Z. Zero to a hundred: What's the fastest way for them to turn the other on? Oh, boy! Mickey has a competence kink, but it's not just any competence kink. It's a crime competence kink. Hot wiring a car, stealing an ambulance, talking about getting a giant shotgun? Instant boner for our guy Mickey. Ian gets rock hard in seconds the moment Mickey talks dirty, but what really gets him going is what Mickey does in a submissive headspace- Begging. "Please, I really need to suck your cock... I need it, Ian, please?" Begging gets Mickey whatever he wants, which usually is getting Ian hard in 0.02 seconds.

[mell0bee]

CR asks: 1 & 17 if you're feeling spicy; if you're not, 9, 14, 25, 39 (feel free to pick & choose)

i took so long to do this because i had all the questions answered and then tumblr crashed and deleted it all :( but here we go (also thank u for the ask!!!)

9- Location in Exandria you'd like to see in a possibly canonical one-shot/EXU but with non-main campaign characters (as in Song of the Lorelei/The Darrington Brigade)

vasselheim!!! i doubt it will be a major location again for a full campaign because it was featured so heavily in c1 but an exu type deal could be so cool!!! i thought that vasselheim was SO underutilized in c1. when i was first watching it i was Big Sad that the no arcane magic thing was played for laughs, you could easily center a whole campaign around that idea. i wanted to see more of it during c1 and obvs after exu calamity i want to see more of it Even More. theres just so much to learn about it after the context of exu calamity. like i want inside information about the political system. i want to explore how decisions get made there. and like bro do u want a story about Hubris??? oh yeah??? you like critical role so are you perhaps a Hubris Enjoyer??? perhaps of the Magic User Variety?? imagine a wizard or a warlock trying to hide their magic in vasselheim. it basically writes itself. imagine a high-ranking cleric as a pc. or a noble. based on what's happening in c3 do you think they have like. an Old Secrets Protection Board? and perhaps some Scholar Spies trying to break in? idk man there's so much you can do there and i would like to See It Please Thank You

14-Describe the art you would most like to create or commission if talent/money were no object.

i have like 7 animatics in my head that i am not talented enough to make but honestly. this whole jester-focused animatic set to folding chair by regina spektor. it’s really good in my head i swear. also a post c1 animatic set to dodie's cover of blackbird which has been in my head since i finished c1 god i have actual brainworms

25-What class do you most want to see Matt play if he is in a future EXU campaign as a new (not Dariax) PC?

artificer. primarily bc as much as i love him, matt’s pcs tend not to be my kind of character. at least in cr oneshots he’s got a thing for the Generic Edgy Protagonist Boy type which i’m sorry buddy but like. no thanks. and based on artificer/engineer type npcs he’s played i doubt he will go for that archetype as a pc. matt loves some Insane Scientists and so do i, easy S tier character trope, so whether he plays it straight or goes for the more unhinged type like most of his npcs im down 100%. also i had a whole rant here abt how much i love dariax and i hope that matt continues to step out of his comfort zone for pcs because for me personally i think it works really well!!

39- favorite parental figure NPC?

I HAD A WHOLE RANT HERE ABT HOW MUCH I LOVE MARION LIKE I THINK I WROTE LIKE 300 WORDS. the gist of it was how i love that she is very much an imperfect parent which we can see in jester now, but she’s still a good parent!! she’s still trying!!! she’s got her own trauma but she’s trying!!! idk that is v important to me. also i love how she is a sex worker and is not shamed for it at all. and that she has agoraphobia (sp?) and its treated as like!!! fine and not irrational at all!!! idk man idk how matt and laura did such a good job with such a respectful and grounded portrayal of a character like marion but they DID also parent trap ftw

spicy answers under cut, just keep scrolling if u dont want to see my mildly lukewarm takes. thank u.

1- Character you don't particularly like, but will defend vehemently when people dislike them for the wrong reasons.

(also this is the only answer that saved lmao)

sadly i cannot think of any other characters so i have to talk about Mr. Warcrimes McTreason. i like canon essek okay though i do think he is Overhyped, but fanon essek is so annoying lmao which makes me not particularly like him. on the other hand i think people not liking him bc they don’t think he deserved redemption are Wrong. as a redemption arc it was like. Fine. not everyone can pull a zuko and like. whatever. and idk i think that redeemed heroes should be a little morally dubious. as a treat. i guess in a way i am glad that aeor arc essek doesn't get to actually be morally gray bc the fandom would be insufferable but Hot Take i am a Gray Morality Enjoyer i think that More protags should be war criminals actually.

17- You know that post that's like "I wish you could filter in ao3 on 'attitude towards a canon event'?" In the world of imagination, you can! What's the event or attitude?

*gestures vaugely at kingsley* to be completely honest i was pretty sad for a few moments there that they succeeded in rezzing molly, was tentative when whatever the end of 140 was, and i’m so happy kingsley is a thing. i think that people who wanted molly back have Missed The Point Entirely. molly needed to stay dead and talesin knew that (thank you talesin) (also not to mention fanon molly, who is infinitely worse than fanon essek. god can you imagine that. again thank you talesin.)

[iwantabatlleaxe]

I have a bad habit of insulting my dad (shit guy) through what sound like compliments no, not the comedy way.

The other day I was talking to him and my sister and my dad said he would never stop smoking and that his health would be shit for it, resulting in an early death.

I replied with "you should try vaping", which made my sister correct me as that is more dangerous.

They thought I was trying to come up with a healthier alternative.

I meant it as an insult.

He once (the day before the other story) said that he'd die young from not exercising and that he was already feeling the effects.

"I have more six years to me." He said.

"Do you?" I sound worried.

"More, but six years I can enjoy." Explanation.

"... do you?" Doubtful tone.

OH MY GOD this is like a narrative coming full circle, when I was a kid I'd beg for him to stop, hide his boxes, ask for nicotine stickers to other ppl, but after 21 years of egocentric bs I'm just agreeing when he talks pity on himself

As a matter of fact, talking to my dad is similar to those tense political meetings in media where we both know each other's plans but say things just vague enough not be called out.

Funny thing is that when his "plan" didn't work (reduce child support under the percentage determined by law without breaking contract via having my consent) he went for the THROAT.

Alright this is just a vent now.

But man. It was satisfying.

He talked shit about my mom, she never paid anything blah blah, that stuff.

He was lying! Plus he once refused to pay school materials! He's a prosecutor! He gets 30x the minimum wage! Always did, always will!

He complains about his debts (that he wants to leave for moá) when he spend his father's savings on prostitutes and plastic surgeryfor his wife!

Well, one whore who cost literally my college tuition.

No shade for sex workers, btw, but it's a little strange for his wife to be boasting about how much they spend on their third (who's my age btw!) To refuse to pay child support.

He also talked about how I abandoned them when my grandma died.

I spend her last week there, me and my mother HELPED him with medical decisions, and he didn't tell me about her death so I couldn't make it to the funeral.

My sister found out via her manicures ig.

Oh, and I'm not allowed inside their home because I didn't let the third come to my graduation. It's how he sees it.

I didn't allow my stepmother come (for reasonsTM) (plus the girl is MY AGE. It would be kinda okay if he didn't have the habit of dating his 20/23 yo subordinates.)

Anyways. I hope he stops going to the clubs I go to. And I hope he and my stepmother rot together because what the fuck is that

I've seen all kinds of violence between them (more than you'd imagine! Yes including sexual! On her part! She also said her friend should be thankful if she ever got raped!) So... you can guess how it affected me growing up.

Anyways. I hope they die.

[vampiresbloodx]

I'll never leave your side, ever.

Vanessa (fnaf) x Reader.

Word count: 1,327

Trigger warnings: angst, stab wounds, hospitals, fake relationships (hehe), fluff fluff FLUFF. Mutual pinning, yearning so much YEARNING. SLIGHT SPOILERS FOR THE FNAF MOVIE!.

A/n: here's part two of everybody knows I'm a good girl, Sheriff. Please go read part one before reading this or none of it would make sense <3 might make this into a mini fun series, cuz I love Vanessa sm.

The first time you saw Vanessa in the hospital with a breathing mask around her, you almost threw up. 

It reminded you of seeing your mother in the hospital and you hated it. Even if she wasn’t the best mum, she was still your mother. 

The nurse surprisingly enough had let you come in at least every single day that you could, knowing that Mike, the dude you had met who carried Vanessa out of there (thank god) and managed to get some help before it was too late. The doctors said it could have been worse, but the stab wound wasn’t too fatal to be fixed, the only issue is that she just hasn’t woken up yet. 

It has only been awake, you couldn’t even sleep right at your home knowing the state Vanessa was in, so you just somehow convinced the workers to let you stay in her room to look over her while she’s unconscious and be there for when she wakes up.

Mike comes to visit, with his little sister that you met called Abby, she was nice and seemed to like Vanessa a lot, you didn’t know how good she was with kids, it only made sense, she was a ray of sunshine after all. 

But you just couldn’t wrap your head around one thing, why was Vanessa stabbed in the first place? And what the hell was she doing at Freddy Fazbear’s pizzeria?.

In all the conversations you’ve had with the blonde, from late night talks to tipsy talks at the bar, to small convos in her car on the way home, she has never once brought up that place. 

You remember hearing about it when you were a kid, from those in your classroom who would brag about how cool it was that they were going to it for their birthday, your family never had the money to do those kinds of things, big parties, you were always jealous of them. 

But maybe it might have been a good thing you’ve never stepped foot in that restaurant before.

You just don’t know what type of connection Vanessa has to that place. Mike wouldn’t even tell you or even bring it up, neither would his sister, they looked rough, what could have gone down in that place that had left them so messed up like that? You didn’t even know if you wanted to find out or stay oblivious. 

There was a soft knock coming from Vanessa’s door as you looked up, seeing a nurse standing there with papers in her hand and a glass of what you assumed was water. 

“Mx. Shelly?” she said, walking into the room, “I thought you might be thirsty, here, drink, this must be a rough time for you, I’m sorry.” 

Oh yeah, another thing. In order for you to be able to get let in to even see Vanessa, you had to fake that you were her wife, of course, it worked, they weren’t assholes about it which was good. 

You took the cup of water, taking a sip, you didn’t realize how dry your throat was. 

“Thanks” you smiled. 

She nods, giving you a sympathetic smile. 

“Sorry if I seem like I’m being nosy, stop me if I am” she chuckled nervously, “I just didn’t expect Sheriff Vanessa to be in a relationship, let alone married.” 

“I understand the confusion, well, we had to keep it a secret, to ourselves, you know? Not everyone is accepting of same sex relationships.” 

She nodded. 

“I get that. I also um have a girlfriend myself.” 

“Oh?” this catches your attention. 

“Yeah!” she beams, “she also works here. She’s great.” 

“I’m happy for you.” 

She looked between you and Vanessa in her bed, still sound asleep. 

“Anyway, I’ll let you two be alone, let me know if you need anything, okay?.” 

“Will do.” 

Once she left, you reached out to grab Vanessa’s hand, giving it a light squeeze. 

“Please wake up soon. Don’t leave me.”

–

Two weeks have passed. 

You didn’t even try to ask Mike any more questions of what happened that day Vanessa was hurt. 

All you cared about was seeing her awake again. 

And hopefully she can quit her stupid job. 

Or at least take a break.

You knew how stubborn she was though. 

But you’ll take your chance. 

It was close to 3AM when you woke up, hearing a mumble, a groan, you couldn’t really tell what it was, if you were hearing stuff. But then you saw it, no, felt it. 

Vanessa was awake. 

She was alive. 

Her hand twitched in your hold as you gasped, getting up from your chair as your eyes met hers, she seemed to be struggling on getting her words out, but you took off the mask, shouting for the other nurses that worked nightshift to come and help. 

God she was alive. 

And you couldn’t be happier. 

“Vanessa? Vanessa? Hey, it’s me” you said, trying to sooth her panic as her heart rate had picked up on the monitor, the nurses were doing their procedure, you just let them do whatever they had to do. You were just relieved to see Vanessa and her eyes open, staring at you. 

She grabbed your hand, after the nurse made her drink some water, she pulled you in closer.

“Is Abby okay?” she asked, of course, the first thing she talks about is if anyone is alright, even if she was in the hospital. 

You chuckled. 

“Yes, Abby, she’s okay.” 

She breathed a sigh of relief. 

Vanessa looked exhausted, leaning back down on her bed as she grabbed another cup of water. 

You had so many questions that you wanted to answer, but you knew you could wait. 

“How did they even let you stay here? Isn’t it family only or a spouse?” Vanessa asked, raising an eyebrow at you when she saw you look away from her gaze. 

“Um well, I sort of told them I was your wife.” 

“You what?” she let out a laugh, but then groaned out in pain and stopped as she gripped at her stomach. 

“I can’t believe you did that.” She said with an amused smile, shaking her head. 

“You’re not mad at me?” you asked. 

“Why would I be?.” 

“Because I haven’t even taken you out on a date yet and now the whole hospital thinks we are married,” you teased. 

She chuckled. 

“Oh really? You wanna take me out?” she asked, a blush forming on her cheeks.

“Yes, I really do.” 

She grabbed your hands again, bringing them to her lips as you watched her press a kiss to your knuckles, you shivered under her touch. Wanting more. 

“I’ll keep you to that.” 

–

Another few days passed and you never not once left the blonde’s side, not even when she insisted you go home and get sleep in a proper bed, you argued against that. 

She found out there was no arguing with you when you were set on something, it seems like you two had a lot in common. 

But Vanessa knew she had to come to truth about what really went down at the restaurant, that got here in this bad state in the first place, she just wasn’t sure how to even begin, how to word it right, how you’d react, but she cared about you, liked you a lot, and you liked her back, it was clear you weren’t going anywhere anytime soon, even with how tired you looked from the lack of sleep, Vanessa saw how much you worried about her, it made her heart swoon. She loved that feeling. It was rare that she ever got this close to someone or let anyone be close to her.

Eventually she will tell you, who she is, why she was stabbed, who mike and abby was, but for now, she wanted to just be with you, the only place in the world where she felt safe.

[matryosika]

반역 (betrayal)

pairing – bang chan, hyunjin x reader

word count – 7.2k

warnings – brat!reader, degradation, dirty talk, kind of forced submission, masturbation (f), blowjob/deepthroat, slight knife play, impact play, use of toys (ropes, wand and nipple clamps), double penetration, unprotected sex, body cumshot.

notes – this is a 1000 follower special, so i really hope you all like it. i haven't read this but i am uploading it anyways because i am getting ready to go to bed. please remember that english is not my first language and if there are grammar mistakes i'll make sure to correct them in a few minutes. thank you so much for reading my stuff, and thank you so much for 1000 followers in less than 4 months. it really means a lot. if you like this, or any of my work, please leave an encouraging message on my ask. also, i have a ko-fi! if you want (and are able to) please leave me a tip. it would help me to buy my college books and it would be very very much appreciated!

you can support femme here!

a “congratulations, y/n” followed by a bunch of applause was the last thing you heard before your mind drifted completely into oblivion, celebrating internally as you managed to keep a relaxed demeanor in front of your boss and your co-workers.

the meeting, which lasted for barely 30 minutes, felt like a whole eternity. your heart kept on pounding with excitement, your sweaty hands kept on clenching to your leather purse and both of your legs spent the entire time fidgeting, anticipating the most important verdict of your whole career.

congratulations and promotion, those were the words you were looking forward to the most ever since one of your co-workers told you that Mr. Hwang, koisra’s CEO, was starting to evaluate every analyst on the market’s research area to promote it, since the head of the department was about to retire soon.

not in a million years you imagined you would be standing there, in one of the top consulting firms in south korea, getting a promotion and winning 7,700,000 KRW per month for doing the work you enjoyed the most.

well, doing the work you loved most and pulling some strings, like every thinking human being would do.

[6:42 p.m., Hwang Hyunjin]

meet me at the signiel tonight

we must celebrate, isn’t that right?

the way your phone vibrated against your hand shook you out of your trail of thoughts, lowering your gaze just a little to read the message resting on your home screen: meet me at the signiel tonight. the signiel, probably one of the most expensive hotels around seoul and hyunjin’s favorite place to de-stress. you knew him for long enough to know what his definition of celebration was, but you truly couldn’t be mad about it. not when he was a crucial factor in Hwang’s decision to promote you.

instead of replying, you looked for his gaze around the meeting room. sitting across the other side of the table, both of his eyes were already fixed on you, a proud smirk faintly raising on the corner of his lips while his eyes gave you a compassionate look.

hwang hyunjin, the head-director of the partners identification area and your favorite worst nightmare. you had always thought that he earned his position because of the power his last name held but, once you met him, you understood that he deserved it. smart, witty, hard-working and a bastard with a god-complex, he always ended up having things his way.

and that included you. partly.

partly because he took an effort in seducing you. and partly because the decision of falling into his temptation was actually yours. it was not really something you would take pride in, really, but sometimes ulterior motives are what really moves people to do something. like my mother used to say, work smarter, not harder.

however, as much as your initial motive was far from why you were still with him now, you couldn’t deny that hyunjin was probably the man of many people’s dreams. yours included.

“that would be it for today, we will see each other next friday as usual” mr. hwang announced, interrupting the eye-contact between you and hyunjin who was now standing up from his seat in order to leave the meeting room. you ran both of your hands against your skirt to straighten it before standing up, the excitement of the promotion mixed with hyunjin’s promised night made your heart throb in anticipation, a warm familiar sensation traveling throughout your whole body.

but that cozy feeling disappeared in a matter of seconds when another set of eyes darted you a cold gaze from across the room, making you feel almost powerless. even if you wanted to look away, his intimidating presence made you look at him for a few seconds, your whole body trembling inside at such an infuriating look.

you wouldn’t really consider breaking up with chan a mistake because that was a decisive moment in you working towards getting that promotion for yourself, but you also couldn’t deny the fact that your heart melted in nostalgia every time you looked at him. he was a good partner, caring, hard-working, smart and patient.

but as hard as you loved him, you never really saw a future in him.

he left the meeting room without saying anything, not even a smile or his characteristic faint smirk he used to give you before, when you achieved something you worked for. as much as that action made your heart sank, you swallowed hard and left the meeting room, trying to focus your mind on the excitement behind the promotion or on the plans you had for the night.

“y/n, hey!” moon-ji, one of the interns of the company, who was also a research analyst like you, reached out to you as soon as she saw you leaving the meeting, “congratulations on your promotion!”

“thank you, moon-ji” you replied, giving her a soft smile and slightly touching her shoulder.

“i was planning on giving you some flowers as a gift for your promotion and as a sign of gratitude for everything you have teached me, but it seems like someone already stole my idea” she joked, letting out a soft laugh.

“flowers?” you asked her confused, looking over at the desk you had occupied for the last 2 consecutive years. and there it was, sitting on top of various work-sheets, probably the most expensive flower arrangement you had ever seen in your entire life. however, as soon as you read the white gift-card resting on top of a bunch of roses, you inevitably gulped.

“the secret of success is perseverance. congratulations on your promotion, beautiful.

to y/n, from hwang hyunjin and bang chan.”

the smile that once was settled in your face faded away after reading the last words, your pair of curious eyes dancing around the whole lobby trying to catch a glimpse of either hyunjin or chan, but they were nowhere to be found.

reading both of their names together on a gift meant for you made your heart beat a hundred times faster than before.

maybe you wouldn’t have reacted this way if only hyunjin and chan weren’t enemies to death.

even though you had been living in korea for a while now, you just couldn’t get used to the expensive life-style people carried in seoul. no matter how many times you had walked those streets or ate at those restaurants, it always shocked you how expensive everything looked to the point that you almost always ended up feeling out of place. nonetheless, you couldn’t deny how much you loved everything about the city.

“i have a reservation,” you mumbled as you approached the reception of the hotel “under the name of Hwang Hyunjin”.

the young lady behind the counter gave you a courtesy smile and proceeded to dive into the computer in front of her, clicking the keyboard as her eyes danced from one side to another. “i have the reservation here,” she indicated “but mr. hwang has not arrived to the hotel yet”.

“oh” you cooed, “i’ll just wait for him here in the lob-”

“actually,” the lady interrupted, her gaze going over the rounded pair of glasses she was wearing, “the room he booked is also under the name of bang chan, are you accompanying them?”

“bang chan?” you muttered, almost inaudible for the lady behind the counter but crystal clear for the person who was standing right behind you.

“that would be me” he intervened, one of his hands resting on your lower back as the other one leaned on to receive the card to the hotel room. “mr. hwang had a setback but he will be joining us soon”.

the lady frowned once she caught a glimpse of the terror engraved in your face and, almost instinctively, her eyes immediately went over chan. without prying any further, she handed chan a red card that was meant for the door of the hotel room, “signiel seoul hotel hopes that your stay is pleasant enough for you to come back, please enjoy the night”.

and even though she might’ve had a ton of questions about the odd situation, she kept them to herself. when it came to powerful people, or people with influence, it was better to stay quiet than to ask any questions that they didn’t feel like addressing.

“start walking” chan whispered in your ear right after he saved the card in the pocket of his black pants, the hand that was resting on your lower back pushing you ever so slightly as a way of encouraging you to do what he commanded.

“first the flower arrangement and now this?” you questioned in a whisper, trying not to draw any attention of the people gathered around the lobby or the hotel staff, “can you explain me what the fuck is going on?”

“shut up and keep on walking, y/n” he mumbled without even looking at you, his jaw completely clenched as he guided you all the way to the hotel’s elevator, “you don’t want to cause a scene here, do you?”.

luckily (or unlucky) for you, the elevator filled up with at least 6 other people, leaving no empty room for you and chan to have a talk. however, that only exempted you from having a not-so-pleasant conversation for just a few minutes.

[9:12 p.m., Hwang Hyunjin]

did you like the flowers i bought you?

they are pretty, right?

something came up but i’m on my way now.

suddenly, the whole elevator felt way smaller than it actually was. the few people gathered there felt like a whole crowd, your body starting to sweat almost immediately as soon as you read his messages and you found chan’s gaze fixed on you. you knew both of them –and you knew they would never do anything to harm you–, but still, it was impossible for you not to be afraid of whatever it was that was going on between the two of them.

and just when you thought the whole room ran out of oxygen, the doors of the elevator opened.

“room 9097” chan mumbled really close to your ear before pushing your lower back again, signaling you to start walking. and, as astonished as you were, you did.

oh, how you wanted to win the endless battle against your mind, but as soon as you heard chan’s deep voice right next to you or felt his warm touch on your skin, you couldn’t help but bring back the best memories you treasured of him.

as you walked down the long hall, with each step you were drawing yourself further and further from the people that were gathered once in the elevator, leaving behind the bustle and crowded atmosphere only for it to be replaced with the coldness and overwhelming presence of chan. being around him was nothing new, since you two worked together under the same company, but it had been a while since the last time your body found this close to his.

his figure overcame yours as he took the red card to open the door of the hotel room, your eyes fixing on the numbers that were engraved with blank ink in the middle of it. “after you” he mumbled, opening the door for you.

he will never lose his charm.

“make yourself comfortable,” he added, closing the door right after he got in “not that i need to say that, since you come here every once in a while with hyunjin, right?”

“what is this about, chan?” you bluntly asked, laying your purse next to the night stand. he was right, though, you had been at least 5 times at that hotel and that was a very low number for the countless times you remembered.

“i can’t congratulate you for your promotion?” he asked, mocking pain in his words as he drawed a chair to sit right in front of you with both of his legs spreaded.

“since when you and hyunjin are friends?” you questioned him, taking a sit on the edge of the bed right in front of where the chair was positioned. “last time i checked, he wasn’t too fond of you and you hated him with a passion”.

“turns out that, at the end of the day, we had more things in common than we thought we had”. he explained stretching his body on his seat. as hard as you tried to avoid looking at him, you couldn’t help but end up fixing your gaze on the pair of veiny hands that were resting on his knees. those hands that made you see heaven and hell, both at the same time. “you haven’t changed at all” he mocked, his eyes trailing your gaze’s path all the way to his body.

“it hasn’t been that long” you replied coldly, crossing one of your legs on top of the other, “don’t act like you don’t see me on a daily basis”.

“i wish i didn’t,” he added, his gaze fixing on your legs and the hems of your dress without shame, “it would save me a ton of anger”.

“are you still bitter about us breaking up?” you teased, letting out a faint laugh as you rested your body’s weight on your forearms, “i told you i wanted to focus on my career and i did”.

“do you really take pride on getting a promotion for fucking the CEO’s nephew?” he questioned, both his eyes giving you a threatening look, “that’s low, even for a slut like you”.

“a slut like me?” you counter-attacked, trying to maintain your composure even after the words that came out of his mouth stinged your pride, “you never complained about it when we were together, dare i say you loved it”.

“that was back then,” the dark-haired spoke, “when i had something that no one else had”.

“i’m not an object, chan” you fired back, trying to keep up with his intimidating aura.

“you never complained about me treating you that way in bed when we were together, dare i say you loved it” he hissed, using the same words you did just mere seconds ago.

and before you could respond to him anything, the door of the room opened.

there he was, hyunjin, wearing the same black suit he had at the meeting with his long dark hair loose, holding a leather bag of the same color as his clothing.

you stood up from the edge of the bed and walked towards him, the amount of intense emotions threatening to explode right in front of his face. “can you explain me what the fu-” and without leaving you any more time to finish that sentence, he took a fistful of your hair and pulled it harshly, making you kneel right in front of him.

“shhhhhhhh,” he hummed, his characteristic playful smirk making an appearance in no time, “i brought you here to listen, not to talk”.

chan stood up from the chair and walked towards hyunjin, the two of them looking down at you while you struggled to find a comfortable position to ease the pain provided by hyunjin’s grip on your hair. “i don’t know what twisted thing is going on in both of your minds” you hissed, making eye contact with one and then another, "but i truly have no interest in knowing”.

“are you sure?” hyunjin questioned, mocking a sweet tone in his voice as he leaned down to be eye-level with you. “you don’t even want to know the story behind my newest friendship, beautiful?”

you looked at him in awe for a couple of silent seconds, your eyes threatening to start watering from the pain inflicted on your scalp as hyunjin’s grip got harsher and harsher with time. “i’m going to tell you, anyways.” he added with a smile while chan leaned down to open the leather bag.

and just when you thought the evening couldn’t get any weirder, you identified a lot of the things inside of the black leather.

things that both hyunjin and chan had used on you in the bedroom.

“i thought it was going to be way harder to get my way with you, you know?” hyunjin questioned, his available hand caressing your cheek with gracefulness as chan managed one of the things inside of the bag, “i thought it would take a lot of effort to have someone as intelligent and attractive as you are with me”, he continued his dark gaze making your whole body tremble under the warm touch of his hand, “but turns out, i had you for me since the very first day you started to work towards that promotion, isn’t that right?”

you knew where this was going, and to be honest, you were not quite sure if you were ready.

“i knew my last name was powerful enough to be respected, but i never knew it was all i needed to have you begging on your knees for me”.

“my bad” you mumbled with a faint smirk dawning on your face, “i should’ve been clear about my intentions before sleeping with you”.

“see, that’s the part i pity the most,” hyunjin rambled, looking over at chan’s maneuvers, “you didn’t really need me to have that promotion”.

chan’s figured moved towards your back, kneeling behind you as he grabbed both of your arms and settled them behind your back. you knew what was going to happen, but you had no intention to fight it.

not when your soul was ablazing for it to continue.

“my uncle was going to give you that promotion either way, your work is impressive” hyunjin mumbled, giving you a devilish smile, “too bad your neediness always get the best of you”.

“don’t act like you didn’t enjoy any of the nights we spent together, hyunjin” you counterattacked, wincing every time chan tightened the ropes around your wrists a bit too tight. “or do you want me to remind you how much you whined and begged for me?”

“tsk-” hyunjin clicked his tongue, “someone truly needs to fuck the brat out of you”.

“one should’ve thought you are just as dominant in bed as you are at work” you teased, trying to get the worst out of the long-haired, “but if only they knew how much of a pathetic needy man you are”.

“keep on talking” he whispered, tilting his head while never breaking eye-contact “and i assure you that you will regret it later”.

one last knot on the ropes tying your wrists and you couldn’t help but let out a faint cry, knowing that chan applied too much force on it on purpose. “she looks way better when that pretty mouth is put to good use” the short-haired mumbled, positioning himself right next to hyunjin who was now completely standing up.

“do you miss me already?” you teased chan, giving him a needy gaze on purpose to put him more on edge, “is that why you teamed up with hyunjin here? because you missed fucking me?”

“you never shut up, do you?” chan groaned, holding your hair with one hand while the other one unbuckled his belt and pants, your mouth watering from the sweet anticipation of getting something you fantasized with often. “the only time you are quiet is when you have your mouth full”.

you tried to resist his grip to make things even more fun, but he was always ten times more stronger than you were. and no matter how bratty you wanted to act, having his cock mere centimeters away from your lips made your cunt clench desperately around thin air “open your mouth”.

“make me” you teased, knowing that those words were like purchasing a ticket with no return.

chan cupped your cheeks and forced you to open your mouth, slamming his cock right into your warm hole while his hands moved from your cheeks to your hair, forcing you to swallow his whole length without giving you any time to adjust.

“look at her” hyunjin mumbled, taking a sharp black knife from the bag while he leaned on again to be on his knees in front of you, “always ready to take cock like the slut that she is”.

you gagged around chan’s length when you felt the sharp knife dragging along your dress, making cuts and ripping it off completely while hyunjin managed to undress you while having your hands tied up, “she knew she was getting fucked tonight, look at her”.

hyunjin dragged both of his hands along your body, making you tremble under his touch. the underwear you were wearing was almost transparent, leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination, and so he was the first to notice how your nipples hardened every time chan forced himself into your mouth.

“i’ve been buying tons of toys i want to try with you” hyunjin admitted, his sweet gaze almost caressing your presence while you tried to keep on taking chan’s cock inside your mouth, “i talked to chan about it and we both bought you something… other than the flower arrangement, of course”.

right after finishing that sentence, chan’s cock withdrew from your mouth to give you an opportunity to open your eyes and catch some breath. you panted, an immense amount of drool escaping your lips and staining your underwear as well as hyunjin’s hands. “look at how much that pretty mouth of yours was watering to the thought of being filled with cock” hyunjin mumbled, “were you thinking about sucking his cock when you saw here at the hotel?”

you licked your lips without giving him a proper answer, your eyes scanning every single one of the movements he did. “isn’t this cute?” hyunjin asked, standing up completely and holding what looked like a chain in between his fingers, “chan picked the design specially for you, but it was my idea”.

“she is going to like it” chan assured, taking the chain between hyunjin’s hands and leaning on to put them on you “you’ve always said how good it feels right here”.

his hands lowered down your top underwear to reveal your breasts, the sight of your hardened buds making chan’s cock instantly throb. “it might hurt a little, but i know you will end up liking it” he mentioned, taking the chain and clenching both ends of it on each of your nipples. “does hyunjin know how much like pain, y/n?”

you hissed at the feeling of the nipple clamps, almost arching your back while you tried to breathe out the overwhelming feeling. however, not giving you any time to get used to the sweet pain, chan’s hand grabbed the middle of the chain and pulled it, making your whole body straigthen up in an instant. “fuck-”

“you gag, i pull” he ordered, “you make any sound, i pull, understood?”

“is this my punishment for hurting you both?” you asked, your glossy eyes making hyunjin’s cock beg for its release.

“think of it as a payback” hyunjin answered, “you had what you wanted and now we are both taking what we want”.

chan pulled from the chain again, making you cry. the sound, however, drowned immediately as soon as he pushed his cock back again your mouth again. hyunjin lost almost no time, unbuckling his pants and belt while chan fucked your mouth. and ever since then, they spent taking turns on shoving their cocks inside your warm hole, making you drool, gag and cry around their lengths every time they forced themselves in you.

“i wish you could see yourself, y/n” chan groaned with his jaw clenched, the sight of you eagerly bopping your head over his length while hyunjin’s cock brushed one side of your face waiting to be used could make him cum almost instantly, “your parents would be extremely disappointed if they saw what you are doing right now”.

you slightly withdrew from chan’s cock to take hyunjin’s length inside your mouth, making a mess on yourself in the process. “isn’t she pretty?” hyunjin asked, his head rolling slight back due to the feeling of your warm lips wrapping around him, “taking two cocks at the same time like the good slut that she is”.

“i bet she is soaking wet by just having her mouth fucked” chan grunted, his hand caressing your hair while your mouth did wonders on hyunjin’s cock, “maybe we should leave you like this, that way anyone who wanted to use you could have a go with you”.

you shook your head against hyunjin’s length, withdrawing from it while a string of saliva connected your mouth with his cock. nonetheless, you weren’t counting on the chain hanging on your breasts to be pulled. “did i told you i was done?” hyunjin asked, earning a painful whine out of you before resumed your task.

“there are so many things we both want to do with you” chan admitted, starting to unbutton his shirt, “one night is not going to be enough”.

his voice full of lust and the hidden promise behind his words made you squeeze your thighs together in an attempt to receive any kind of stimulation on your core. never in your life you thought you would’ve ended up being used by both your ex-boyfriend and your current partner, but the idea excited you maybe a little bit too much, to the point where all your inhibitions were completely wiped off from your consciousness.

after hyunjin’s cock left your lips, he untied the ropes for you to be able to take your underwear off, as well as to give you more freedom on your upper limbs. “how long have you been planning this?” you asked with a sore throat, your hitching breath and quick heartbeats making you feel almost dizzy.

“maybe we never hated each other like you thought we did” chan replied taking out a familiar device from the bag, “you are not the only one who knows how to lie around here, y/n”.

“let’s play a game, shall we?” hyunjin interrupted, his hands slightly pushing your back into the bed while chan handed him the wand vibrator that you knew too well, “for every sound you make, you get one spank” hyunjin explained with a devilish smirk, his cold gaze fixed on how pretty the nipple clamps looked on you, “and no matter how good we are making you feel, you are not allowed to cum”.

you looked at him and then at chan, which had a serious demeanor on him. chan knew your limits more than hyunjin did, but the both of them were just as fearless. chan wanted to push you to the edge because he always loved to see how you outdid yourself, but hyunjin just liked to push your limits because he was a fucking sadist. and you loved them both equally.

“what happens if i cum without permission?” you panted, opening both of your legs once you felt hyunjin’s hands forcing your thighs open.

“you don’t want to now, y/n” he smiled, turning on the wand and dragging it across your thigh.

it wasn’t even close to your core, but a rebellious moan still managed to escape your lips as soon as the toy touched your skin “that’s one”.

you rolled your back while your forearms rested your whole weight, repressing another painful cry when chan unexpectedly removed the nipple clamps from your breasts. “good girl” he praised in a mocking tone, peppering kisses on your reddened and sore buds.

“no moaning” hyunjin warned, pressing down the wand even more against your bundle of nerves. you arched your back against the bed, trying to hold your breath in order to avoid making any kind of sound.

“you’re such an obedient slut” chan groaned against your breasts, his tongue grazing around them avoiding the place where you needed him the most in purpose, “always ready to fucked, always ready to please anyone who is willing to give you even the slightest crumb of pleasure… you are the perfect fucktoy for us to use, you know that?”

you nodded with your eyes closed, your back still painfully arched as your body tried to get used to the sensations of the vibrator.

“you should see how desperate she gets at work” hyunjin intervened, looking at how much you struggled to keep your composure, “every time she tells me how much she needs to touch herself at the restrooms when i’m busy because she just can’t go a day without having a cock to fill her up”.

“is that right, y/n?” chan asked, dragging his finger over your sensitive nipples and making your whole body squirm under his touch, “i can imagine how pathetic you look inside of the bathroom stalls with both of your legs opened, your cunt dripping wet while you desperately try to get some release with those pretty hands of yours”.

and, once again, you couldn’t repress the moan that escaped your lips at his words.

“this is your second one” hyunjin announced, increasing the mode of the wand.

“you want to cum already,” chan whispered, “isn’t that right?”. you shook your head in despair, one of your hands covering your mouth while tears started to prick in the corner of your eyes. the stimulation provided by hyunjin, along with chan’s presence and words was everything you needed to cum.

but you also knew that if you did so, the fun was going to be over in a matter of seconds.

“just look at her” hyunjin spitted, one of his fingers brushing against the skin on your thighs, “her whole body is shaking and his cunt is throbbing, i bet she can’t even make a coherent sentence because she is already too fucked out to even think properly” hyunjin mocked, the sight of your pulsating pussy making his cock twitch, “she is ready to cum, too bad she doesn’t have any permission”.

you tried to close your legs around hyunjin’s hand, but he was faster to place one of his knees on top of your thigh to prevent that from happening, “i will not stop until you reach your breaking point, so keep your legs open for us, slut”.

“you can make all the noise you want now” chan mumbled as he gave a look to hyunjin “we at least want to hear how good you beg and whine for us”.

you gasped deeply as you cursed under your breath, a ton of incoherent words leaving your lips while you did your best to obey hyunjin’s rule.

“go ahead,” hyunjin grunted, licking his lips at the sight of your weak body still fighting the urges to cum, “degrade yourself and we’ll see if you deserve to cum”

you knew exactly what the both of them wanted, and you knew why they wanted it.

they wanted to see you touch rock bottom because they couldn’t bear the fact that you had use the both of them for your own pleasure. they wanted to see you getting humiliated because it was a way of paying them back for the things you got at their expense. but right now, being completely naked in a bed in front of them, your whole body anticipating for a sweet orgasm while their gazes were fixed on you and their cocks were aching to be inside you… you couldn’t care any less.

“i’m nothing but a filthy slut” you cried, your hips bucking against the toy hyunjin was holding against you, “i’m nothing but holes for the both of you to use when you please”.

a devilish smirk appeared on both of their faces, groaning instinctively at your words.

“i need you both to fuck me” you cried, coming out almost as a painful scream, “fuck- i don’t even care which holes you use, just please-please, pl-please fuck me, i’m nothing but a fucking cockslut”.

your hips kept on grinding against the wand, while both hyunjin and chan stroked their lengths at the delicious sight of your pathetic body practically begging to be used and fucked like an object.

“just because we can’t spent another second without fucking your holes-” hyunjin groaned, pressing the wand against your bundle of nerves even more, “you can cum. but don’t you dare to think for a second that we are done with you”.

and with those three heavenly words, you let out the filthiest moan the both of them had ever heard from you. one spasm after another, your whole body and legs started to shake almost uncontrollably on the bed, your back completely arched while your hands held the soft bed sheets harshly.

“that’s our good slut” chan praised, trying to hold down your body “you look so pathetic and dumb right now, y/n”.

hyunjin turned off the wand and left it aside,undressed himself and laid down on the bed grabbing the nipple clamps that chan left on the side. “i hope you enjoyed it” he muttered, settling himself down on his back while he signaled you to get on top, “because now it’s time for the punishment”.

your weak legs got on top of hyunjin, whining and crying everytime his cock grazed against your core, providing you even the slightest overstimulation.

“2 spanks, isn’t that right?” hyunjin asked with his head slightly tilted, “don’t you think you deserve more?”

“yes, hyunjin” you replied almost automatically, ready to say anything to have your way. and your way was having the both of them fucking you until you forget everything but their names.

“how many do you want?” he asked, “or how many do you think you deserve?”

“give her 20” chan ordered, putting himself right behind you, “and i’ll give her another 20”.

hyunjin licked his lips and forced your whole body to rest on top of him, one of his arms locking you against him while the other one caressed your asscheeks, “count for me, please”.

and so you did. one after another one, you recieved every spank while being bent over hyunjin’s body, feeling his cock hardening every time you let out a painful cry. you couldn’t see yourself, but you knew from experience that a bunch of bruises were going to be decorating your ass tomorrow.

“so pretty” chan groaned, looking at how red both of your asscheeks looked. during your relationship, he was never too fond of causing you any pain. however, that all changed once he saw your pretty body squirming under him every time you received the slightest bit of stimulation.

after giving you a few seconds to gain your composure, hyunjin’s cock was the first one to slam itself into you, earning a moan out of your swollen lips. “you are- so fucking tight” he groaned, clenching his jaw at the sensation of your walls hugging his length, “no wonder why you are always begging to be filled”.

you placed both of your hands on his chest while your head rolled slightly back, feeling the warm sensation of his cock inside you. hyunjin’s hands grabbed the nipple clamps again, and he lost no time into clenching them around your nipples again.

“you look so pretty in these” he groaned, feeling how your cunt throbbed every time he tightened the clamps, “i want to see how pathetic you look riding me with these hanging on from your breasts.”

you let out a faint cry once the clamps were completely hanging from you again, the sore feeling of earlier making its appearance as soon as you tried to move on top of him.

“you are going to ride both of our cocks at the same time” chan mumbled, your whole body trembling with anticipation at the feeling of his length brushing against your asshole. “so you better make us cum”.

you took a deep breath as you felt chan prudding into your tightest hole, the painful feeling being almost unbearable.

“sluts like you can take a cock on their asses” hyunjin groaned, feeling how every time you clenched harder and harder against him, “suck it up”.

your whole body fell down on hyunjin again, your forearms too weak for you to even hold yourself. “i can’t-”

“yes you can” chan interrupted, almost groaning at the feeling of your warm hole, “you had taken me many times before, this time it’s not going to be an exception”.

let out a cry again, feeling how he slammed his cock in and out of you in an attempt to get you used to it. and as much as you hated to admit it, it worked.

the painful feeling was long gone, only replaced with pleasure and the arousal of knowing that both of their cocks were inside you, begging for you to milk them completely.

“start riding us” hyunjin ordered while the tip of his fingers brushed against the gold chain in front of him, “you know how to make us cum, pretty good slut”.

with hard work, you managed to raise your body by resting the palm of your hands on hyunjin’s chest, your hips involuntarily grinding against both of them.

“faster” chan demanded, landing a spank on your sore ass, “prove us how much of a slut you truly are”.

and just as if your brain was controlled by each of their words, you started to move eagerly against them, ignoring the soreness of your whole body. the way the nipple clamps felt on your breasts everytime they bounced, the way hyunjin’s and chan’s cock filled you up just fine, chan’s filthy words and hyunjin’s penetrative gaze was everything you needed to reach your second orgasm.

but you needed to take your time, you needed to engrave this memory in your head because never in your life you had felt more pleasured than being submitted to them.

“come on, slut” hyunjin mumbled, one of his hand pulling the chain of the nipple clamps ever so slightly, “weren’t you bold a few minutes ago talking about how much i beg for you when you ride me?”

and just like a small spark ignited a big fire, his words caused that bratty part of you to come out once again. your hands that were once resting on his chest moved all the way to his neck, choking him just fine and using him as a support, riding both of their cocks while hyunjin’s smirk grew wider and wider.

“you say i can’t go a day without being filled up with a cock” you moaned, making sure to clench around both of them constantly, “but you can’t go a day without wanting to fill me up, we are the same”.

chan let out a groan at the scene and your words, grabbing your hips while he actively slammed his cock into you, making you cry and whine even louder than before.

“that doesn’t make you any less of a slut” hyunjin moaned in between broken words, his smile growing wider everytime you choked him harder. “a beautiful, filthy, cockslut that just wishes to be used as a sex toy every single fucking day”.

you continued on doing your task, choking hyunjin as the chain grazed over his pretty plumped lips. chan’s cock felt heavenly inside you, stretching your ass just fine, but it was the sinful noises coming out of his mouth what made you feel the most aroused.

and just when you thought you had found physical stability in your body, chan grabbed a fistful of your hair and forced your head back, making you arch your back while his eyes found yours.

“you are nothing but our filthy cock slut” he groaned, punding your ass at a rough pace, “you are meant to please us and only us, every time and at any hour of the day that we want. you are nothing but our dirty cute sex toy, always available for us to use and fuck whenever we feel like it”.

“yes, yes, yes, fuck-” you chanted, feeling your orgasm approaching every time a word came out of his lips.

“you look so pathetic right now, y/n” he moaned, his noises mixing up with hyunjin’s, “being stuffed by two cocks and degrading yourself… i wish you could see yourself”.

he let out of your hair making your whole body fall against hyunjin’s once again, chan picking up the pace of his thrusts while he, like hyunjin, desperately chased his high.

“fuck- i’m cuming” you anounced once again, hiding your face on the long-haired’s neck.

“cum all over our cocks” he groaned against your ear, feeling how the movement of your hips became sloppier by the minute, “prove us how much of a slut you are for us”.

and with those last words, your high washed over you once again. not without hyunjin’s hands finding your neck and choking you back as a way of revenge, looking at your pretty glossy eyes trying to keep themselves open while you reached the highest point of your orgasm, your moans and whines coming out broken as hyunjin restricted the flow of oxygen through your head.

“please-” you whined.

“please what?” chan groaned, gripping your hips harshly while he chased his own high.

“please- cum-”

“what do you want, pretty?” hyunjin panted, feeling the consequences of your high driving him almost insane.

“cum- inside” you managed to mumble, your incoherent and fucked out mind too busy trying to recover from the nerve wrecking orgasm to even attempt to talk.

“do you want us to cum inside you?” chan asked with fake sympathy.

“y-yes” you whispered, your eyes rolling to the back of your head while you tried to bear the overstimulation on your holes and nipples, “cum inside”.

“our pretty dumb slut can even form coherent words” hyunjin mocked, slightly slapping one of your cheeks. “too bad we don’t follow orders from fuck toys like you”.

and with that being said, both of them withdrew their cocks from inside you, leaving you without any physical support and laying you down on the bed as you tried to catch a glimpse of what was going on.

“please- not”

“aren’t you a cockslut?” chan questioned, stroking himself right on top of your body, “cock sluts don’t mind where they get the cum, right?”

“inside-”

“be grateful we even fucked you in the first place, y/n” hyunjin groaned, looking at your pretty fucked out face, “and be grateful that we are going to cum on your beautiful body”.

tears started streaming down your face once you realized that you were not going to get what you truly wanted, that being filled up with their cum on both of your holes.

you looked at the both of them stroking their lengths on top of your body, begging for them to cum on you over and over again.

and that’s what they did, painting your abdomen and breasts with their sticky arouse.

“this is the only thing you are good for” hyunjin whispered in your ear, looking at how good your body looked while being dirty, “and just know that we will continue on using you over and over again, because that’s what sluts like you want, isn’t that right?”.

and you, being too weak to even rethink your decision, nodded.

if only you knew, that this was merely the beginning of what was about to come.

[mercy-burning]

She’s An Angel

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Spencer discovers that Reader has a rather promiscuous personality behind closed doors, and he can’t help but give into her. Category: SMUT (18+), (there’s a lil fluff at the end, but it’s mostly filth lol) Warnings: Language, heavy flirting and sexual tension, female/male-receiving oral sex, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, exhibitionism, innocence kink (kinda?), breeding kink, dirty talk Word Count: 10.8k

***EDITED: 7/23/2021***

MASTERLIST

NOTE: Hi, guys! This is my entry for @willowrose99 ‘s 1-Year Writing Challenge Celebration! My prompts were: Only Angel by Harry Styles (fun fact, this is my favorite Harry song! And the notes/texts that Reader sends to Spencer are lines from the song), stealing clothes, and the dialogue “You know, I kinda like it when you call me -pet name-” I hope you all enjoy it! I had SO MUCH FUN writing this!!!

Also! Little fun fact: sex and metaphors/references to religion is like... my favorite thing in the whole world, so I made a tiny playlist for you to give a listen if you’re interested! If you have song recs so I can add them, please let me know! I’m always on the lookout for new stuff :) Enjoy!!

***

He didn't think much of it the first day she started working at the BAU. If anything, Spencer was glad that they had an intern— someone who could share some of their responsibilities without completely changing the dynamic of the work. She even became part of their family, going out with them after cases, attending every workplace gathering, whether it be a wedding for a co-worker they didn't see often, one of Rossi's dinner parties, or Henry's birthday party.

It wasn't until they were setting up for the BAU office Halloween party that he noticed something was... different.

Y/N and Spencer were put on decorating duty while everyone else brought food and music, and whatever else. They stopped by extra early to set up, meaning they would be there together, alone, for at least two hours before anyone showed up.

Normally that wouldn't have been anything to worry about, but Y/N showed up in costume, and it completely threw him for a loop.

Now, he wasn't one to really care whether or not people used Halloween as an outlet to dress like sexy nurses or cheerleaders or whatever else. Sure, he'd rather go with something on the scary side, something with a creepy mask or intricate makeup, but in the end the holiday was everyone's to enjoy how they wanted to. And one way or the other, he never saw anyone in a sexy Halloween costume and found himself tempted by them in the slightest. In fact, it was rare that he ever saw anyone in one at all.

So, when Y/N slowed up to the office wearing a very skin-tight, tiny schoolgirl costume, and his heart leapt out of his chest, mouth going dry and blood running hot at the sight of her?

He was a goner.

Her eyes lit up when she saw him, dropping the large bag she was carrying to run over and give him a hug, which he shakily returned, trying to snap out of his daze. Suddenly he felt a little underdressed, not wearing his costume yet, and truthfully, he wasn't sure if he wanted to wear one at all now, fearful that she'd think it was too immature.

Even more frightening than the holiday itself was the fact that Spencer found himself caring about what Y/N would think of his costume when a minute ago it hadn't even crossed his mind.

He cleared his throat and blinked rapidly before she released him from her hug, hoping to expel his fear and remember that she was his friend and she'd never actually say anything bad about his costume. Not that that'd even mattered in the first place. It shouldn't have mattered, right?

God, pull yourself together! She's just a pretty girl dressed in a suggestive costume, it's nothing you haven't seen before...

Though, he wasn't even sure he could call her a pretty girl right then.

Because when she pulled away from him, talking about some of the decorations she brought, he had ample opportunity to get a good look at her costume up close. And she wasn't pretty. She was downright sexy, all legs protruding underneath a short plaid skirt and adorning shiny black heels, curly hair tumbling down her shoulders in pigtails. Her shirt was so low, most of the buttons undone to reveal a black lacy bra underneath. She wore a pair of glasses that sat cutely on the tip of her nose and minimal makeup, the only noticeable thing being bright red lip color.

That wasn't what was different, though.

Sure, she'd never worn anything that scandalous around work or even on nights out, but it wasn't the fact that she'd done so now that felt strange. No, it was the way she looked up at him, her head hung low and her eyes looking up through eyelashes. When she got excited to tell him something, she pitched her voice higher. And often times, she'd put herself in compromising positions, and it seemed like it was on purpose.

At one point she stood right in front of him trying to hang a streamer on a beam she was most certainly not tall enough to reach. Her arms stretched high, all fabric on her body rising up and exposing more skin. Spencer quickly tried to avoid any problems, offering to help so she wouldn't hurt herself, first of all, but also so that he wouldn't find himself staring too long when he shouldn't have been staring at all.

The whole time they were decorating, she found excuses to drop things and pick them up, to stumble and hold onto his arm for steadiness, to accidentally brush past him... And that's what was so different about her.

He didn't want to assume she'd been drinking before coming to the office, and if he'd known any better he wouldn't have assumed it in the first place. But that was the one and only thing that crossed his mind that could have been the answer to her strange behavior, despite the lack of alcohol on her breath. (The only reason he knew her breath didn't smell of alcohol was because at one point, she hugged him again and pulled back to look in his eyes, brushing stray curls from his face and telling him they did a good job finishing up the room they'd been working on.)

Now they were in the conference room, and Spencer was hanging streamers as Y/N sat in one of the chairs, wheeled back to the middle of the room so she could observe everything. Well... observe Spencer was more correct. At least that's what he figured, anyway. It was like he could feel her eyes burning into the back of him. Or maybe he was just still unable to get over the fact that she and her stupidly hot costume had had that big of an effect on him.

He stood down from the chair and asked Y/N to hand him more tape, refusing to look at her.

"Spence, are you alright?" she asked sweetly, rolling her chair over to the table so she could reach the tape. The innocent concern in her voice had that same suspicious tone to it that wouldn't leave him alone, like it was nagging him and calling to him... begging to confront her.

He flicked his gaze down to meet hers for the briefest of seconds before looking back at the table. "N—Yeah, I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" She picked up the tape and toyed with it between her fingers, which were manicured a light pink color. He couldn't help but stare at them. "You seem a little... on edge."

With a swallow, an attempt to bring moisture back to his throat, Spencer shook his head. "I'm... No, I'm sure. Everything's fine."

Y/N sighed. "Well, I've been working with you profilers for some time now, and... I think I can tell when you're lying. Was it... something I did?"

There she went again, her voice high and soft. Innocent. Like she was in character.

Spencer looked at her face again, and then immediately he regretted it. She was half pouting at him, doe-eyed and head tilted to expose her neck. He swallowed again, trying to figure her out while also figuring out what to say.

"No," is what he settled on, audibly nervous.

She could tell, too, because he thought he saw her smirk for just a split second. But then it was gone, replaced once again by her pout. "Oh... Good. Because I thought for a second that you didn't like my costume."

She obviously had to be up to something, right? Was she... flirting with him? And more importantly, did he want her to flirt with him? He'd never really thought about Y/N in that context before, but she was single, beautiful, and... well, truthfully that's all he really knew about her. They'd been friends for about a year now, and he couldn't put together one single thought about her other than the stuttering, muddled confusion over the fact that she was in a sexy Halloween costume and most likely openly flirting with him.

What was that Emily said once about his IQ dropping in the presence of a pretty woman?

Y/N had rendered him utterly thoughtless.

And speechless, too, apparently, because he stood there, staring at her without saying a single word.

"Spencer," she called out softly, almost like a lullaby. Her chair rolled back, away from the table to give him a better view of her legs as she un-crossed them and very slightly opened her knees. "Do you think I'm pretty?"

As if he wasn't already practically burning inside-out since the moment she arrived at the office, now his blood ran hot, and he was suddenly very uncomfortably warm. "U—Um, y—yes, you're... You're beautiful, y—your costume... It's nice, it looks nice on you."

Her pout slowly turned into a smile as she patted her knees. "Thank you... I wore it just for you, you know."

Is this some sort of bizarre dream? he wondered, his knees almost buckling at her words, their tone, and the meaning of it all.

"Y—You did?" he whispered brokenly.

"Mnmm," she drawled as her fingers toyed with themselves. "You teach, right?"

"Sometimes."

Y/N hummed and nodded, her legs still closed enough that he couldn't see anything... extra promiscuous. "You know, I bet you have quite a few students who find you attractive... Tell me, do any of them dress like this?"

She leaned back in the chair and started to run her hands slowly up the inside of her thigh, just above her knee. "Do they ever... Sit in the front row and... spread their legs just enough for you to see the pretty panties they picked out... just for you..."

By now her hands were resting on the inside of her thighs, her legs spread in exactly the way she'd described. He couldn't help himself. There she was, offering herself to him, and in his line of vision was the faintest glimpse of baby pink fabric that matched the color of her fingernails.

He didn't even know how to verbally respond. By now he was sure his face was beet red, and his palms were sweating so badly and struggling to keep him upright as he leaned forward on the table. Ah, the table— the only thing separating him from her, a fact which he wasn't quite sure if he was thankful for or not.

The spell she had around her broke when her phone rang. And just like that, it was like she was... herself again. At least, the 'herself' Spencer had always known. She sat up and walked over to the other side of the room to grab her phone from her bag, reading the screen as he struggled to catch his breath.

"It's Penelope. She has a costume emergency I have to help with. Are you good putting the rest of these up?"

"U—Um, yeah. Yeah, go."

Y/N smiled and grabbed her bag, thanking him as she walked past and left him behind.

He heard her call back as her figure was etching itself into his brain, ready to remain there until the end of time. "Can't wait to see your costume!"

***

Luke and Tara were having a conversation that he was supposed to be paying attention to, but Spencer's mind was still occupied by Y/N and her... outward display of sensuality.

Her voice was echoing in his brain, replaying over and over how she'd dressed up for him. And the longer he tried to wrap his brain around everything, the more he wound up confused. Where had her forwardness even come from? Had she been actively interested in him this whole time and he just hadn't seen it until now? A possibility, but why had she chosen to go to that extreme rather than just tell him the truth? Maybe she'd just found being overtly sexual an easier tactic than others?

Or maybe, in the end, she was just messing with him. Even though Derek had moved away, it was entirely possible that he'd somehow concocted one of his ridiculous pranks and roped Y/N into helping him since he wasn't around to do it himself. A smart move, though it was highly unlikely.

Spencer just didn't know what to do. Depending on how the rest of the night went, he was probably just going to have to muster up the courage to ask her what her intentions were. And depending on what she says, he was going to have to figure out what he wanted from their relationship... Did she want just sex? Did he want just sex? Did she want to go out with him? Is that something he would want as well?

He was just about to mull it over when Penelope's boisterous laugh sounded from the other side of the room. Spencer looked up, eager to see if Y/N was with her, since she'd been called away on a costume emergency. Penelope was dressed as a devil, red sparkly horns on her red-streaked, curled hair. She was dressed head-to-toe in a red dress and shoes that felt very much like her, with feathers and sequins, and her makeup was also red and black and absolutely glittery.

And sure enough, behind her stood the woman who'd been occupying Spencer's mind for the past hour and a half. Though, she wasn't dressed as a schoolgirl anymore.

He found himself swearing under his breath as he took her in, shimmering where she stood, dressed in all white.

She was an angel.

An actual angel. Her hair fell loose around her, accessorized with a headband with a golden halo attached to it. Her dress was still pretty form-fitting, though nowhere near as scandalous as her previous outfit. It was long and flowed out at the bottom until it hit the floor, a ring of gold at the hem. The sleeves were also long and bell-bottomed, accented with gold at the end.

And from where Spencer stood, even that far away, he noticed the glitter that surrounded her eyes, gold to compliment the color on her dress. Her lips were still bright red, and her glasses were gone. And the wings... As small as they were—most likely to keep from taking up too much space—they stood out in any crowd, purely white and outlined in gold, just like the rest of her outfit.

Why had she changed? Did... she actually change at all? Had he truly only imagined their encounter hours ago?

"Any... specific angels crossing your mind?" Spencer heard Luke say, punctuated with a pat on the shoulder.

He blinked and looked at him. "What?"

"Y/N... She makes a pretty good angel, eh?"

"Uh, yeah, I—I guess so."

Luke and Tara laughed, obviously amused by all of this. But they hadn't seen her earlier. They hadn't been there to witness her seducing him and acting like she'd done it a million times over. They didn't know what she was doing to him, inhabiting every corner of his brain and driving him mad trying to figure it all out.

But it wasn't uncommon for his friends to tease him about the female attention he got sometimes. And when it was obvious that he was flustered, they kept the friendly teasing going. And every time, he settled on leaving it alone, because he knew it would pass and he wouldn't have to worry about it again, at least until the next woman hit on him in public.

And Y/N? She worked with them. As long as she was in his head, he was afraid he'd never stop being flustered in her presence.

So he had to know. He had to talk to her and see what was going on, no matter how awkward it might get.

For now though, it was Halloween, and he was going to spend the night with his friends while doing the very rare amount of drinking and the more frequent amount of laughter.

The night didn't come without a few looks in Y/N's direction, though. She never came up to him directly, though a few times he'd catch her looking at him. And each time, she'd wave and continue on her merry way, laughing with Emily or doing some silly dance with Penelope in their coupling costumes.

Honestly, if earlier hadn't happened, he would have thought nothing of it. She was being completely normal. Happy, friendly... Simply Y/N, as he'd known her for the past year and a half.

He just finished saying goodbye to JJ, who was leaving early to go trick-or-treating with her kids, when she finally approached him. At the sight of her getting closer, her otherworldliness making his blood go warm again, he tried to compose himself. After all, there was no way she'd do anything sensual in public like this, right?

"I didn't get a chance to compliment you on your costume yet," she said brightly, her voice not carrying that higher tone from before. "You make a very believable zombie."

He looked down at his tattered clothes, a small laugh escaping him. "Thank you... It's no high-level makeup job, but I tried my best."

When he looked back up to her, the shimmer of her makeup basked her in a glow that made it incredibly hard to breathe. She really was pretty. Still sexy, of course, but in an understated way this time.

And he couldn't help but bring up the difference. "You... changed."

Something sparkled in her eyes then, giving them a devious glint that inherently contradicted her costume, and the mere implications of that made him tremble, especially as she said, "Mhm... I figured the schoolgirl costume was a little too inappropriate for the workplace. And besides... I did say I wore it just... for you..."

So he hadn't imagined the whole thing... On the one hand he was relieved to know he wasn't freaking out over something that hadn't actually happened. But... on the other, what did that leave him with?

It left him with a woman who was standing in front of him, dressed like an angel while giving him all sorts of devilish feelings.

Once again she'd rendered him speechless, though now his thoughts were filled with images of those pretty, glimmering eyes above him, watching as he worshipped her between her legs... Of her hands twisted in his hair as he showed her just how much he wanted her, to show her how beautiful she was.

Those thoughts were interrupted when she got closer, toying with a stray curl that stuck out from his head. She twirled it around her finger and looked up at him, doe-eyed again as she purred, "Happy Halloween, Doctor Reid."

She was gone too quickly, whisked away by the throes of an office holiday party that, one way or another, served as the beginning to a long, tempestuous affair.

***

In the weeks that followed, Spencer went about his days as normally as he could, focusing on work, and getting ready for another month of teaching, where he'd be away from his friends and, therefore, also away from Y/N.

It's not that he necessarily wanted to be away from her... Yet, after constant flirting with no direction other than his dreams filling with filthy images of the two of them together and no actual outlet for it, he figured a break would do him some good. Of course, he wasn't sure what would await him when he came back—if she'd forget about all of it and give up or if she'd come at him stronger than before.

It was his final day before leave, and so naturally, Y/N had to make it hard on him. He was sure that's what she was doing.

Since it was getting colder, she strayed away from skirts, though occasionally she would show up to work in a longer dress or a shirt that hugged her in all the right places, especially on the days that he would be working with her more. She had the BAU's schedules on hand always, so she had to be using that as a way to get to him.

On those days, she often used her higher pitch when she spoke to him, and her eyes were always adventurous— they wandered over every part of his body and sometimes quickly blinked away when he caught her, accompanying an embarrassed smile. (Though, Spencer was convinced she really was absolutely not embarrassed.)

Other times she pulled the "Oops, I dropped something," trick, and "You know, it's almost Winter but it's still so warm in here, don't you think?" followed by a stretch of her body as she slowly put her hair up or dragged it over her shoulder. 

His plan was to wait until he got back from leave, assess their situation from there after he'd cleared his head for a while, and then talk to her about what the hell was going on. Though the thought of confronting her scared him a little, he knew he couldn't let this go on any longer without some sort of conversation about what was next... What it all meant. It would drive him crazy otherwise.

With all the sensual, suggestive looks and actions she was throwing at him, though, it was a wonder he hadn't gotten to that point already.

As if she'd figured this out—because of course she would have found a way to get into his brain and know what he was thinking and feeling before he could even do so himself—Y/N stood by a storage closet with a clipboard. She pretended to write things down, when in reality she was looking up at him every so often, biting her lip and crossing her legs where she stood. She looked utterly desperate for something, almost like it was painful for her to be deprived of whatever it was she was looking for.

Spencer had a sneaking suspicion he knew what that was. And the thought sent a wave of electricity through his veins. All day she'd been going extra hard in attempts to catch his attention, and since it was his final day before leaving for a month, he knew that had to be the reason why.

If catching his attention was her goal, she'd definitely succeeded.

Across the room, and across a small sea of co-workers who were head-down, going through paperwork, he caught her eye and waited, his fingers twitching like they wanted to reach out to her. She tilted her head to the side and tucked her bottom lip between her teeth, staring back at him like she was in a daydream.

And sure enough, she was standing underneath a light, one singular beam that sat atop her head like a halo and bathed her in a soft glow.

Even without the costume, she was an angel... For a moment Spencer wondered if maybe she'd planed on it all from the start— making her move by dressing like an angel on Halloween for one night and then finding any way on purpose to replicate that presence without actually dressing up again. Was it a way to mess with his head, to make him believe that she was calling to him? That she would... save him somehow?

He had to know what she was doing.

So he gave in and stood up, his eyes keeping contact with hers as he got closer and closer. Before he could get to her, though, she winked and then turned around, entering the storage closet and disappearing before his eyes. Still, he followed her, desperately hoping that's what she wanted.

And with a silent prayer that felt ironic as he thought it, Spencer opened the door and entered the adventure that awaited him. Whether it would be heavenly or otherwise he wasn't sure, but either way he was ready to confront it.

Y/N had turned on a desk lamp, its orange glow the only source of light in an otherwise pitch-black space. She leaned back against a table, still standing with her legs crossed over each other, hands bracing themselves on the tabletop. "How's it going, Doctor Reid?"

"What are you doing?" he asked, almost immediately after she greeted him. Now that he was alone with her, away from unassuming eyes, he exhaled and visibly showed his confusion through pleading eyes. "Please, I need to know what you're doing..."

He barely saw the contours of her face through dim lighting as she smiled. "What do you mean?"

"Y/N... Don't do that." He took a step closer, even though the quick beating of his heart signaled that it might have been a dangerous move. "Tell me..."

"Isn't it obvious?" she cooed, her hands coming out to toy with the hem of her frilly skirt.

As he looked down at it, he had to wonder if there really was a God out there, some higher being that sent this angel down to destroy him. How else did it stand to happen that even though it was nearing the end of November, the one day it was warm enough for Y/N not to freeze while wearing a skirt was the final day he had before leaving for a whole moth?—Before it was inevitably snowy and she wouldn't have the luxury to tease him with her skin?

She must have caught his lingering gaze on her legs, because she laughed softly, spreading them to stand a bit further apart while her fingers very lightly pushed the fabric of her skirt up. "I've been trying to get your attention ever since I got here... But you never seemed to notice. So I figured... Why not be a little more... forthcoming..."

"Y—You could have... said something," he whispered, forcing himself to look at her face. But as he was learning, he couldn't look at any part of her without his whole body going up in flames. 

By now she was walking closer to him, small, languid steps that perfectly showcased how her body could move. "Well... Truth is, I was scared... Every time I tried to talk to you, I got really nervous..." Her voice was demure, apologetic almost... Embarrassed. But it had to have just been part of the allure, right? Part of her show? "You're just so... intimidating."

Spencer swallowed, a small laugh coming from him as he tried not to collapse at her closeness. "I'm... I'm really not..."

But she laughed, finally close enough to reach out and grab his tie, which is what she did. She held the fabric in her hands for a few seconds before letting it drop, bringing her pointer finger to gently trace patterns on his chest. "Not in a mean way, silly... You're... incredibly smart, and you're good at your job... You're always so nice to everyone... And I bet you really know how to make a girl feel good..."

He found himself trembling under her touch again as she brought her hand down to meet his. She leaned up to nudge his chin with her nose as she moved his hand to the inside of her thigh. It was only the slightest of touches, nothing rushed or passionate about it. In fact, Y/N seemed more taken with the idea of using her touch to draw everything out— to make him pine for it, lose all semblance of sanity until he finally gave in and did whatever he wanted to her.

"Don't you wanna know what it feels like to touch me?" she whispered, her breath hot on his neck. Meanwhile her hand guided his own farther up her skirt, until he felt her skin getting warmer and warmer with each millimeter. His throat was dry, breath shaky as he fluttered his eyes closed and embraced the moment, embraced the guidance... "To feel how wet you make me?"

His heart practically leapt out of his chest once his hand was finally met with said wetness. Her panties were damp and oh so warm, and he couldn't stop the whine that left his throat as she pressed his fingers hard into her against the fabric. Her fingers covered his like a glove, guiding them in small circles over her clothed clit as she sighed into his neck.

"You feel that?" she asked, nuzzling into his skin. "That's what you do to me, Doctor.  From the moment I saw you, I knew you'd ruin me..."

He breathed a laugh then, finding it utterly ironic how that's how she felt. She could have just been toying with him, but there was enough longing and desperation in her voice to let him know she really meant it. She'd been waiting for him to come along and whisk her away...

So that's what he was going to do.

Spencer removed his hand from her then, walking them over to the table and pulling her right to him by gripping the waistband of her panties and keeping her still. The gasp she let out fueled him in a way that would have wrecked him if the job hadn't already been done. As he looked down at her, her body was basked in the soft orange luminescence of the desk lamp, a sight that aesthetically added to his desire and farther fueled the heat that had been accumulating in his veins, waiting to be released.

"Is that what you want, angel?" he breathed, the words even taking him by surprise. His sexual experience was far from non-existent, but it was limited enough that he'd never acted this feral before. Never had a partner ever had this strong of a hold on him, so tight that he found it a struggle to breathe. Add on the fact that he wanted to embrace that struggle if it meant being this way with her, and you had a man who was completely unraveling under the allure of one single woman until she ultimately brought forth his demise. "You want me to ruin you?"

Though he was giving in, like he assumed she wanted in the first place, Y/N hummed, tilting her head again and blinking up at him. "You know, I kinda like it when you call me angel..."

Spencer gripped the fabric tighter, and she whined. "Is it what you want?" In other words, Do you want this? 

Y/N nodded, and then he crashed his lips with hers as he tugged at her panties and let them drop to the floor in a pool around her feet. She flung her arms around his shoulders and pressed herself into him more, allowing his tongue to part her lips and explore her with liveliness. She was more than welcome to embracing it, verbally giving him praises in the form of whimpers and physical ones in the form of her hips rolling forward to get more friction.

As one of his hands found purchase under one of her thighs, he thought back to Halloween night, and how he'd imagined his head between her legs. The memory had his entire body tensing with pleasure, and without a second thought, he pulled away and dropped to his knees, looking up at her with what he hoped was the purest form of desire.

He looked up at her, admiring the way her face looked in the dim light, as he lifted one of her legs and placed it on his shoulder. Still keeping eye contact, he tilted his head and kissed the inside of her leg. But eventually he let his focus lean to immersing himself in her pleasure, tearing his eyes away from hers and completely shifting his head to face her leg. His lips trailed upwards, taking his time to remember the taste and the feel of her soft skin. 

The higher he got, the heavier her breathing became, and it wasn't long before he fully had his head under her skirt. She tried to move the fabric so she could see him, but he gripped her wrists and pinned them at her sides, eliciting a laugh from her that quickly turned into a whimper once he brushed his nose over where she ached for him.

Without being able to stop himself, Spencer inhaled, breathing her in and letting out a shaky breath as he inched closer and involuntarily closed his eyes, completely wrapped up in her like he'd never felt before. He was intoxicated by her, even more so when his mouth finally made contact with her dripping cunt.

Feeling her shudder above him was almost as heavenly as the way she tasted, sweet and bitter and oh so delectable. He'd never craved anything more than her in that moment, his tongue lapping her up and making a point to taste all of her. He explored and worshipped and praised her just how he'd imagined he would, though now that it was actually happening and he'd really had a taste of her, he wasn't sure he could ever go back.

Not that he wanted to. Especially as she whined and rolled her hips against his face, seeking more pleasure as she tried to be quiet in the closet.

Spencer, though he knew the importance of keeping it quiet right then, couldn't say he was the same way. Since his head was hiked up her skirt, and his sounds were muffled by her skin, he was as loud as he wanted to be, groaning into her and mumbling praises in between while catching his breath. He reveled in the feeling of her wetness coating the lower half of his face and the sounds that both pairs of her lips were providing. It truly was better than any symphony or choir he'd ever heard, and if he could spend the rest of his life down there, worshipping at her altar and giving her everything she desired, he would have.

But they were at work, and if they were gone too long, it would get suspicious.

So, as much as he wanted to draw out her pleasure—and by association, his own—he focused on getting her to her peak, flicking his tongue out over her clit and letting her hips rock forward to get her exactly where she wanted to be.

He knew she was about to come when she stopped whining and whimpering altogether, the leg she had draped over his shoulder curling and tightening around him to keep herself steady.

His tongue was relentless, keeping at what it was doing while Spencer imagined what her face must have looked like. Were her eyes rolling to the back of her head or were they squeezed tight? And her mouth— was it hanging open? Was her bottom lip tucked between her teeth as she attempted to keep herself from yelling out? And as her hands struggled in his grasp, trying to escape most likely in favor of gripping his hair, he imagined them tied up above her head, attached to his bedframe as he took his time, drawing out every little sound she could have possibly made until she was just as unraveled as he was.

And then her grip loosened all around him, a whiny sigh escaping from her mouth, and Spencer reluctantly drew himself away from her. He dropped her leg from his shoulder and licked at his lips, tasting as much of her as he could before he had to return to work. And then, when he was moving to remove his head from under her skirt, he caught sight of her panties on the ground, picking them up and sliding the garment lightly up along her leg as he stood.

The only thing was, he wasn't putting them back on her.

No, they hung loose between his fingers as they tickled the inside of her legs, and when he finally stood tall enough to tower over her again, he got as close as he could to her, bringing the fabric up between her legs, right where he'd just been, and pressed them firmly to her sensitive pussy.

"Time to clean you up, angel," he whispered, swiping his hand forward and doing exactly that. Y/N whined against his mouth, faintly tasting herself on his lips as he cleaned her.

He kissed her then, gently, removing his hand from under her skirt and depositing the damp fabric right into his pocket.

If Spencer hadn't known already that he was done for, he would have figured it out right then, when he pulled back far enough to see the high, blissed out look in her pretty eyes. She blinked at him and sighed, telling him one final thing before she pushed past him and walked out into the office with no underwear and half-wobbly legs.

"I miss you already, Doctor..."

***

He missed her, too.

The month-long leave was supposed to assist in letting him clear his head, but the longer he was away from her, the more it drove him mad. Occasionally he'd still taste the sweet tanginess of her on his tongue, and no amount of coffee could rinse it out. Sometimes he'd be grading papers and daydream about hearing her whimper out his name as he took care of her.

It didn't help that she also sent him texts, little things that would have sounded innocent to anyone else but had a way more promiscuous meaning to the both of them. They mostly involved the discussion of angels, of course, as she left him with a quote or a song lyric, and other days with a fact about a specific angel.

Today, the morning before classes started, she sent him, She's gonna be an angel, just you wait and see... Spencer didn't know what it meant, what it was referencing, but it was innocent enough that he didn't think anything of it until lunch rolled around and he checked his phone to see another text.

...When it turns out she's a devil in between the sheets.

He couldn't stop thinking about it. All day, even as he was trying to distract himself by lecturing, all he could see in his mind was Y/N. Sometimes with her angel costume on, but mostly with nothing on, her body fitting into his like a puzzle piece as she sighed out his name like a prayer.

And to think, he had one more week until he would see her again.

But then he was looking through his students' quizzes, small sheets of paper with some terminology and matching definitions they needed to pair together. Since there were only about five minutes left until the class was over, he let his students spend the rest of the time how they chose, not really in the mood to burn himself out speaking when he knew it was only a matter of time before he slipped and said something about Y/N that he shouldn't.

The next quiz he grabbed was folded in half, unusual, but he opened it and was looking to go about his merry way regardless. But then he saw a post-it note right in the middle of the paper, reading She's an angel, my only angel, and punctuated with a pair of red lips.

The first thing he did was drop the pen that was in his hand. Not like he did it on purpose, though, he was pretty sure all joint and muscle function was lost upon reading the handwriting he knew so well, and a reference that only she could make.

And then he looked up, eyes scanning the sea of students to find her. She had to have been there, right? A few of the students found it odd that he was just looking through all of them, but all he was worried about was finding her.

And there she was.

Y/N had tucked herself all the way in the back, her eyes locked directly onto him. She winked then, when she knew she had his attention, and all Spencer could think about was how it must have been another dream. Her texts from earlier had gotten to him more than usual, and because of it, he was seeing her everywhere, seeing what he wanted to see.

Even though he wanted to keep looking at her, to try and figure out if she was really there or if she was just a figment of his devilish mind, he didn't want anyone to catch him. To anyone else it would look like he might have been staring at another student, and with the lust he knew was definitely swimming in them, the last thing he wanted to do was get in trouble like that.

So, to his dismay and reluctance, he slipped the note into the drawer beside him and quietly finished grading, even though he was longing to see how else he could let Y/N destroy him.

Even as the bell rang and everyone filtered out, Spencer kept his head low, refusing to look up until everyone was gone and only one person remained.

The quieter it got, the harder he could feel his heart beating. And then the only thing that cut through the silence was that unmistakable, angelic high pitch that would surely never fail to bring him to his knees.

"Did you get my note, Doctor?"

Only then did he allow himself to look up, and when he did, seeing her closer to him than she'd been in almost a month now, it was like the stars aligned. "Yes," he whispered, getting out of his seat and walking around the desk to be as close to her as possible.

She laughed and met him in the middle, nearly trapping him between herself and the desk. Her hands reached out to grab at his suit jacket and he wished that she'd touch him somewhere else. Anywhere else, just to feel the soft warmth of her skin.

"And my texts?" she cooed, taking another step and actually trapping him between her body and his desk.

"Y—Yeah, I got them."

"Oh, good. I've been thinking a lot about how you left me..." She slid her hands then, under his jacket and across his stomach until they reached his waist. "The second I got in my car to go home, you were already on your way here... And I couldn't help but wonder what you were doing with my panties..."

They were currently back in his hotel room, in the drawer and laying atop of his own clothes, a vision that had him reeling, wondering if she was wearing any now. So he asked. "Are... Um..."

Well, he tried to ask, anyway.

Y/N caught on, though, beaming at him as her hands removed herself from him and slipped up her skirt. "You wanna see the pair I'm wearing now?"

"Y/N... There's... Someone could come in, I..."

She clucked her tongue. "Oh, I wouldn't want to get you in trouble, don't worry. I'll just... Give you a quick peek."

She didn't wait for him to respond, lifting the hem of the skirt and stepping back so he could see the front of her underwear, which were white and printed with black cursive lettering.

Angel.

As soon as he exhaled, loud and obviously very turned on at the sight in front of him, she dropped the skirt and smiled. "You like them? I needed to buy a new pair since you felt the need to steal my others..."

Spencer really didn't know what to say. All he knew was that his body was on fire, and the tightening of his pants was extremely dangerous since he had another class in a half hour and there wasn't enough time to take care of it unless they did something right now. And even then, they were in a public area with hardly anywhere to go. His best bet would be to go to the bathroom and be as inconspicuous as possible to take care of it himself. Or, Y/N needed to leave immediately so he could settle down and just let it go away on its own.

Unfortunately, he seemed to have a hard time denying her of anything.

Which was why he didn't stop her when she sunk to her knees.

As she undid his belt, looking up at him  with sparkling eyes, she spoke to him. "Honestly, I had every intention to just make out with you a little, just enough to satiate myself until I can see you again next week, but... Well, I'm wearing lipstick, and I wouldn't want to embarrass you."

He'd made out with a woman before, who'd worn lipstick, and surprisingly it was pretty easy to remove, so he knew she had to have been lying as some part of a bigger scheme, but... he couldn't quite figure out what that was. Obviously she had plans to take care of his erection for him, so why make up the story?

But then she kept talking, only slightly pulling down his pants and palming him through his underwear. "And then I thought about how pretty you'd look covered in lipstick kisses, and, well... It's always good to start somewhere, don't you think?"

Oh...

His stomach did flips when she traced his dick through the fabric covering it, gently with her middle finger. And then, looking into his eyes from below, she pulled it out and slowly stroked it with her hand, a low hum coming from her throat. "Mmm, I can't wait to mark up this pretty cock..."

That's when he lost all semblance of control, a strained groan falling from his lips, coming from the great depths of his chest, just from her words alone. And she took that moment to lean forward and press the gentlest of kisses to the base of his dick. She held her lips there for a second or wo before removing them and moving just a little higher, her eyes never leaving his face.

Her kisses trailed higher and higher, centimeter by centimeter until she reached his tip, where she ever so slightly flicked her tongue over the slit at the top, tasting his precum. And then gave him one final kiss—one final red mark.

The temptation to grab her hair and hold her there while he fucked her throat was strong, but as he looked down at her, she was examining her handiwork with a seductive hunger that made him realize that no matter how strong his urges got, she would always be the one in charge. Even if she acted all innocent and submissive, she was the one who held the key to his sexual desires, and therefore she was the only one who had the ability to unlock them.

So, he contained himself as she looked up at him, winked, and quickly tucked his hard dick back into the confines of his pants.

And when she stood up, she leaned up to his cheek and pressed another kiss there, leaving behind a red mark and all all his sanity with it, quickly turning away before he could catch her.

"See you later, Doctor," she called over her shoulder before she disappeared out the door.

Spencer let out a long, unsteady breath, debating on whether or not he should take care of his situation in the bathroom or right there in the classroom, behind his desk and into the trash can underneath it while he still had ample time to do so.

He sat in the chair about a minute later, his hand moving furiously under the desk as he breathed out hushed whispers of her name.

***

No matter how badly he wanted more alcohol in his system, he wasn't going to allow it. After one drink he was already starting to feel the affects, veins buzzing right along with the low hum of the music from inside. The single streetlight above him provided only the dimmest of lights as he took deep breaths in and out, focusing on the bitter cold from the December air and the soft pelting of snowflakes upon the skin of his cheeks.

Y/N's touch still burned him, right along his inner thigh where her hand had firmly rested while they and the rest of their friends ate dinner at the bar. All night so far, she'd been teasing him to no end, whether it was a brush of her hand against his crotch or a tiny kiss on the shoulder when no one was looking.

How no one had figured them out yet was a mystery.

Spencer rubbed his hands together, trying to keep them warm when he felt it. She was behind him.

"You've been out here for a while, Spence, is everything okay?" Even when she wasn't speaking to him in her angelic higher pitch, he still felt like succumbing to the sound her voice regardless.

He turned around to face her, and sighed. It figured that even surrounded by a street that was covered in brown-tainted snow, she wouldn't have let it taint her beauty. He was convinced that no matter where she was or what she looked like, she'd always be perfect— capable of knocking the breath out of him every time he looked at her. "Honestly, you've been driving me crazy."

"Oh," she said, her eyes slightly shifting to the ground. "Maybe I... did take it too far, I... I'm sorry." The slight tinge of embarrassment and maybe regret that filtered through her voice nearly ran him to the ground— How could she ever believe that he would feel overwhelmed by her? Sure, to some extent, he was extremely overwhelmed by her, but it was never a negative thing.

"Oh, angel, that's not what I meant," he explained softly, taking a few steps towards her.

She lifted her head, eyes doe-eyed and sparkling, though not as they usually were. This time they were swimming in a softness that made him yearn for her even more. "What?"

"I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm absolutely mesmerized by you... Y/N..." Spencer brought a hand to lightly caress her face, and when she leaned into his touch it made him so warm he thought it would melt all of the snow. "I can't get you out of my head, and I... I don't know if I ever want to. I mean that."

"Y—You're not... weirded out or anything?" she asked softly. "That I just... sprung all my feelings and my lust out onto you all at once? B—Because I know it was sudden, and I came on really strong so fast, I just... I thought you liked it, and so I just kept going, but really I should have stopped and... I don't know, asked if you were okay with it..."

He'd seen this softness in her before— When she watched over JJ's kids in the office sometimes, and when she helped Penelope set the table for their 'family dinners'. Every time, on the rare occasion that she actually went on cases with them, when she helped JJ comfort the families who'd lost their loved ones, he saw it. And even through all the lust, that sweetness in her soul was what truly made her an angel. Even though the lust is all he'd been swimming in since Halloween, deep down he really knew that it was only a small part of who she really was.

So, he said to her, "Y/N, I'm enchanted by all of you. I don't... I don't know what happened to make you want to come on strong to me, but... I'm glad you did. Believe me when I say, there is nothing about you that would scare me away."

He didn't know how she was feeling, but she practically visibly melted at his words, right in front of him. "You really mean that?"

With a smile, Spencer stepped even closer and brushed a thumb over her bottom lip. "Of course I mean it, my angel."

She laughed then, her hands wrapping themselves over his waist. "Your angel, huh?"

"Mhm... If you'd like to be..."

Y/N leaned up and pressed her lips to his in answer, firmly and with all the sweetness she had nestled inside her soul.

But the longer they stood there outside the bar, kisses growing warmer and hungrier with each passing second, Spencer realized that he didn't want her sweetness any longer, not tonight anyway. He cradled her face in his hands, feeling the fire in his veins come alive when she whined into his mouth and willed herself closer.

Before he could say fuck it and decide to take her right there outside, he pulled away, still needing her but not entirely willing to get themselves caught for public indecency.

Y/N spoke before he got a chance to, her higher pitch coming back and almost bringing him to his knees.

"What do you say you take your angel home and show her a good time?"

***

She didn't even get a chance to close the door to his apartment before he was on her, his hands tugging at her coat to get it off.

It was a frenzy, at least while they were stripping. Jackets and boots and scarves were strewn across the entryway and leading into the living room, until each of them only had two layers: their regular clothes and what they wore underneath. And that's when they finally allowed themselves the luxury of wrapping their limbs around each other.

Her legs wrapped around his waist as he grabbed ahold of her ass to keep her steady. For added support, she flung her arms around his neck and kissed him the whole way to his bedroom, but not without a few stumbles. Either way, they were so quite literally wrapped up in each other that the imperfections didn't matter.

Like she could ever come with imperfections... Spencer thought as he set her down, immediately bringing his hands to the back of her dress.

Meanwhile she unbuttoned his shirt, fumbling around so much that he thought she might choose to rip it open, and selfishly he wished she would have. But she got it open without tearing any buttons, and the fabric slid easily off his shoulders at the same time her dress slid off her own.

He was going to kiss her again, but once he caught a glimpse of what she'd been hiding under her dress, there was nothing he could physically do but rake his eyes over her figure and pray for forgiveness for all the devilish things he wanted to do to her.

It was a white set, all lace that was detailed to look like feathers as it hugged every curve of her body perfectly. She wore a set of garters that attached to the panties, which he was pretty sure were crotch-less and outlined in a pretty gold shimmer.

"I knew you'd like it," Y/N drawled sweetly. The pure innocence that dripped from her tongue would have thoroughly wrecked him had her appearance already not taken care of that. And she seemed to understand how immobile he'd become at the sight of her, because she moved of her own accord, gliding over to him and reaching her hand out to undo his belt. "I'm gonna take your silence as a good sign..."

"You're stunning," he breathed, just barely, and she gave him a smile through softly biting her bottom lip.

"You're too good to me..." Her hands pushed down his loosened slacks and waited until they fell to the floor. And then she hooked her fingers under the waistband of his underwear and leaned into his neck. "And I think your kindness deserves a reward..."

Her lips gently pressed to his neck before she dropped to her knees once again, and as she descended, her hands and his underwear did the same, leaving him completely bare and open for her to do whatever she wanted. No matter how badly he longed to throw her on the bed and get to showing her just how much she'd inhabited his every fiber of being, he didn't dare stop her as her tongue darted out and licked a featherlight line along the length of his hard cock.

He let out a sigh and twitched at her touch, a feat that must have pleased her, because she smiled and hummed happily as she repeated her action. Only, this time her tongue was more firm on him— not teasing anymore, but it brought him to damnation all the same.

And then she fully wrapped her lips around the head of his cock, slowly gliding herself down until he hit the back of her throat.

The sound he made was inhuman.

She wasted no time then, bobbing her head at a steady rhythm and moaning around him as she did so. It didn't take long for saliva to start gathering above her chin and dripping down onto the exposed area of her breasts, just above her bra. Occasionally she would hold him at the back of her throat and choke as she looked up at him with tears in her eyes, and the sight of his little angel happily crying with his dick in her mouth sent Spencer into a tailspin.

But as tempting as it was to paint the back of her throat white, he knew he'd prefer to take that action to a more interesting place. So he pulled away from her and breathed out, "Please, not yet..."

He looked down at her as she smiled, wetness coating her skin in the form of tears on cheeks and saliva on breasts. Her hands rested at the tops of her thighs, even as she stood up and blinked a final stream of tears down her left cheek. "Why, is there somewhere else you'd rather fill me up?"

"Please," was all he said, his breathing labored as he imagined what she would feel like.

Thankfully she seemed to take mercy on him— Y/N grabbed his hand and pulled him to the bed, where she laid him down at the headboard and straddled his thighs. "As much as I love spreading my legs for you, I think I'd much rather take a ride..."

"Anything you want," he told her, his eyes traveling up the length of her body as she got comfortable. She was, in fact, wearing crotch-less panties, and the feeling that coursed through him at the sight of her glistening pussy in decent lighting (AKA when he wasn't under her skirt in a storage closet) sent him straight to Hell all over again.

He sighed out as she played with herself, gliding her fingers delicately along the planes of her body, from her thighs to her clit, and eventually she gripped his dick to line it up, lifting her hips above him.

"Are you ready?" she asked gently, rolling her hips to slick him up with her arousal.

"Always ready for you, angel..."

The pet name sprung her into action. She sunk down slowly onto him, and he willed his eyes to stay open so he could watch as her mouth dropped open, eyes rolling back into her head as she moaned out deliciously. He let out a groan himself, the feeling of her tightly wrapping around him like velvet almost too much to handle.

"Ohhh, you fill me up so good," Y/N sighed, gently grinding her hips in slow circles as she finally had all of him inside her. "Just like I knew you would..."

Everything she was doing, between the gradual increase of the speed at which her hips rolled and the way she looked down at him with pure desire, had Spencer wondering what he'd ever done without her. What had he known before knowing the feeling of her nails gently digging into the skin of his stomach as she rode him, before knowing the sound of his name falling from her lips in a whisper? It couldn't have been anything good, because as far as he was concerned, she was as good as it would ever get.

But at some point it felt like he needed to take more. She was giving him her body, offering it to him like the most precious gift she had to offer, and yet he wanted to tear into it and leave nothing behind except her voice, calling out his name into the heavens above. He longed to give her something in return, something that would leave her just as ruined as she'd left him.

And, as always, she could tell.

Y/N laughed seductively as she leaned down, her hips still rocking into his. Her lips pressed a gentle kiss to his before she spoke. "Everything alright, baby?"

All he could do was let out a broken moan as she clenched around him on every upstroke.

"Aww... You want more? Huh, you wanna lay me down and give it to me good? Show your little angel what it feels like to be fucked so good she can't even speak?"

"Don't... tempt me," he was finally able to choke out, and she laughed.

"Aww, come on... Show me what you got..."

Spencer wasn't sure when he actually did it, but one second she was nipping at his bottom lip, challenging him to take control, and the next he was on top of her, her legs spread as wide as they could possibly get as he rocked his hips into her at a deep, bruising force.

She laughed amusedly through whimpers of pleasure, her hands spreading out at her sides like wings as he gave her everything he had. Looking down at her, head thrown back and hair fanned around her head like some sort of angelic crown, he soaked it all in and wondered if this was what Heaven was— the feeling of her succumbing to his lust, the sight of her lost in the throes of weeks of pent-up sexual tension that never entirely got released, the sound of her near-incoherently whining at how good he was...

If it wasn't Heaven, it was surely something pretty damn close.

He was almost there, tension stretching out inside the pit of his stomach, when Y/N grabbed one of his hands and brought it to her lower belly. He felt himself slamming into her at full force every time, the small bump against his hand bringing him further along the road of release.

"You feel that?" she whined, keeping his hand there. "You know what that means, don't you?"

It could have meant a lot of things, but his brain was too far gone, lost in in the fog of pleasure to even begin to think about what it was. But then she answered for him, and it was just about the hottest thing he'd ever heard come from her mouth.

"It means I'm all yours... to do whatever you want with... to fill me up with your cum as much as you want... maybe turn your little angel into a mommy..."

With a loud, guttural groan, Spencer held himself still, deep inside her, and gave her every last drop, his hand remained pressed firmly to her stomach. If he concentrated hard enough, he could almost feel his cum spilling out and filling her to the brim through the barrier. She pulsed and came around him at the same time, warmth spreading between the two of them like a drop of water would soak through fabric, until it completely enveloped them like a heavy blanket.

And then they'd given everything, their bodies clinging to each other for dear life as they settled into the gentle aftermath of such a heavy feeling of ardor. Their breaths slowed and their lips explored each other tenderly, hands doing the same until, finally, they felt themselves drifting off.

***

Spencer dreamt of Heaven that night, glimpses of a future he'd always longed for with other people, but that he would get to spend with her.

A wedding dress, white, but haloed by a gold fog as the woman wearing it glided along the aisle and made her way to him.

A house, small, but fenced in and just perfect enough for the two of them and the baby that was on the way.

A picnic table, damp, but drying out in the sun as it gradually became littered with plates of birthday cake and a little candle that was shaped into the number 3.

A woman, old, but beaming as she showed a photo album to her multitudes of grandchildren, telling them stories about the wonderful life she lived with her husband who always called her Angel.

And when he woke up, seeing that old woman as she was now, sleeping in his bed as the sun beamed through the curtains and basked her in a heavenly light, he knew what Heaven really was.

It was her.

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[randomshyperson]

Love is Outside the Screen - Part III - Elizabeth Olsen x Reader

Summary:  The one where Reader plays Vision in the MCU and she falls in love with her co-worker Elizabeth Olsen.

Warnings: (+18), smut, sexual themes, strap on use, teasing, fingering, sexual suggestions, explicit language, explicit, obscenity, a bit of praise kink, dom/sub dynamics, bottom reader mostly, switch dynamics, power dynamic changes, slight possessive sex, brief angst, alcohol mentions, arguing, jealously, fluffy.

Words: 7.935 K

A/N> Instead of writing my series, I'm continuing works that were finished already. This is basically porn honestly haha No, but jokes aside, we have fluffy moments with a lot of smut. Good reading everyone!

Part One | Part Two | All Works Masterlist || AO3

//-//-/////-///-//

Love is Outside the Screen - Part III

Northern Ireland, two years ago.

You slipped under the long wooden table as the script indicated.

Your character was supposed to give a slight nod, and then gasp because of the torso injury, and you followed the script perfectly.

When the director yells cut, you stand up, trying not to bump into the makeover they did on your clothes.

"That was great, guys!" Shouted Alex Graves in the direction of the cast scattered around the medieval set. "Let's call it a day."

You were exhausted.

The Game of Thrones footage was absolutely grueling, and time-consuming, although it allowed you to learn something new with almost every scene.

Walking back toward the dressing room to clean up your makeup, you smiled shyly at the girls in the salon who congratulated you on the day's performance while helping you to remove your costume.

While they were going through your hair, you decided to check your cell phone.

There were two missed calls from Lizzie, and you felt your heart swell with guilt immediately.

She had also sent you messages asking if everything was okay, or if you were busy, and saying that she missed you, and you wish you had answered them all, but your routine had been completely absurd.

You felt your chest ache with longing every time you thought of your girlfriend.

When you signed the contract, you knew the conditions, and so did Lizzie. But nothing prepared you for the real thing.

Almost three months without a decent conversation, not even video calls, and the lack of her in your life was making you frustrated and irritated all the time. You were sinking into the screenplay and the recordings, because you simply hated not having Lizzie in your day-to-day life.

"Thank you girls." You said as soon as you noticed the makeup completely removed from your abdomen.

The change in the script killed your character sooner than expected, and you should go home early, even though it was going to take two or three months, it was much less than originally planned.

Grumbling softly, you went back to the dressing room, deciding to call Lizzie now that you would have a little time alone.

She doesn't answer until the second-to-last ring.

"Yes?" Her husky voice signals that she was asleep, but all you can feel is your body shaking at the sound.

"It's me, baby." You reply tenderly as you sit back in the armchair, pressing the cell phone to your ear as if you wish you could reach into the device and touch your girl.

"Oh, hey." She comments sleepily, and you wonder if she has closed her eyes again, or even opened them. "It's late."

"I know, I'm sorry." You say leaning back in the armchair. "I wanted to check that everything was okay because I couldn't answer you earlier."

"Don't worry, darling." She says softly, almost sleepily. "I just missed you."

"Me too, my love." You assure her, feeling your chest tighten slightly. My god, you just want to see her, hold her, touch her. "Lizzie, darling, are you asleep?"

"Yes." She whispers, making you smile.

"I love you baby." You say. "Call me when you wake up, I will interrupt as many scenes as it takes to talk to you."

"Behave yourself in the studio, love." She mumbles sleepily, and you laugh lightly. It was the same warning she gave on your last day in California, on the way out of the airport. "I love you. And I miss you."

You cursed the entire movie company at once when you could perceive the upset in Lizzie's tone, even in her sleepy state. You repeated that you loved her one more time before hanging up the phone.

As you put your cell phone away to grab your keys and head back to the hotel, you wondered if a breach of contract was really so bad.

//-//

Present, California.

You felt Lizzie's arms wrap around you as soon as you made mention of getting out of bed. You smiled, turning your body to look at her.

Her sleeping figure with her eyes closed, her hair slightly tousled made your heart warm with affection.

You loved her so much.

Raising your hand to her face, you stroked her cheek gently with your thumb, and watched the woman sigh softly, and even in her sleepy state, lean into your touch.

"Lizzie." You called softly, trying to wake her up. And did so again until she mumbled softly, leaning her face against the pillow. You let your hand wander to her hair, enjoying the softness as you stroked her scalp with your fingers. "We need to wake up baby."

Lizzie just mumbled again against the pillow cotton, making you smile at the cuteness of that scene.

You moved closer only to deposit short kisses across her face, and only stopped when she let out a husky giggle.

"Good morning, love." You whispered against her ear, and were about to pull away, but she tightened her arms around your waist, keeping you almost on top of her, making you smile.

"Good morning." She sighed back against the skin of your neck, and you blushed slightly when you felt her inhale your perfume and then tighten her fingers around your waist. "Fuck, I love you."

You laughed softly at her sudden, hoarse confession, but let your arms slip around her shoulders, burying your body against Lizzie's. The tenderness was wonderful, and she moved one hand up to caress your back while the other remained on your hip, her thumb moving across the skin beneath your blouse.

You tilt your face away just to look at her, and already you find her with her eyes wide open, a shy smile on her lips.

"I love you too, babe, but we need to get up." You tell her, and you almost get the impression that she's not even listening, because all she does is look at your face with adoration.

You bite back a smile as you feel her legs move beneath you, her bare foot caressing your ankle before she spins you around quickly and stands over you, the sudden movement making you sigh and tighten your arms intertwined around her neck.

"Lizzie!" You exclaim humorously, but all you get is a low murmur as she sinks her body against yours and buries her face in your neck.

"How much time do we have?" She asks against your skin, her lips dangling on that sensitive part of your collarbone and sending a shiver up the length of your spine.

"Enough." You reply already affected by her touch, closing your eyes to enjoy the sensation.

Lizzie smiles against your neck, beginning to deposit chaste kisses against your skin, making you sigh softly.

It didn't matter how many times you had been together or for how long, your body reacted to her in the same way. You only hoped that you wouldn't be late for your appointment with the Marvel directors, but when Lizzie slipped her hand up into your pajamas, you didn't care about that anymore.

//-//-//

London, 1 year and 9 months ago.

It's your third time on "The Graham Norton Show."

You finished taping Game of Thrones the day before, and this was your last appointment before returning to California. To Lizzie.

Part of the cast is sitting next to you, and you are glad for that because you are distracted this evening and can use the time they answer questions to think about your girlfriend. And you miss her for sure.

Graham, the host, asked questions about the final season, and about day to day life on set, and after Kit Harington and Emilia Clarke commented on everything being amazing, and not telling anything about the plot since they weren't allowed to, you were slightly surprised that the subject shift went directly to the romance rumors between the cast.

"I hear that some of you have been becoming close friends outside the set." Graham begins with a chuckle, and you and the cast share a chorus of dissatisfaction that makes the audience laugh. "Which is normal in a long series of course. But we wanted to bring that in because we love gossip."

"Since I'm married, can I have a drink in the dressing room?" Kit jokes, drawing laughter from everyone.

"You're supposed to help us with the arguments". Graham replies humorously. He leans back in his chair slightly to point to the monitor behind him. "We have some behind-the-scenes photos here. And Miss Clarke looks very comfortable."

The audience laughed at the comment, and you tried to cover it up with an awkward laugh. It was a picture of Emilia Clarke, your colleague who plays Daenerys Targaryen, on your lap. But the moment was badly misinterpreted. The photo was taken right after one of the prom rehearsal scenes, and Emilia had gotten one of the coordinations wrong, and you laughed when she fell on you.

Of course, this kind of insinuation was happening because to the media, you two were two single women. And you were used to this kind of questioning, but still, it was always uncomfortable.

"We were dancing, Graham." Emilia argues humorously. "It's not what it looks like."

The audience lets out a chorus of disappointment, and you and Emilia giggle awkwardly.

"Was that the mating dance, ladies?" Graham teases and you want to dig a hole in the ground, but all you do is keep up with everyone's laughter. "Despite all the jokes, I think Marvel's couple is going to be threatened."

The comment makes your heart race, but the audience is very approving, applauding heartily.

At least with this you can talk about Elizabeth.

"Is tonight the night you are going to take over America's dream relationship or can we just keep saying that you and Emilia are together, since there is not the slightest chance that someone that attractive is single." Graham tells you with humor making the audience and cast laugh. You try to keep up, not wanting to seem rude. You wish you could tell him that there is nothing wrong with being single, but you don't think you want to create an awkwardness so you just settle back in your seat as you joke:

"Unfortunately I will deny it again, Graham" You reply. "And I'm not dating Emilia either, I assure you."

You spend the rest of the evening dodging the comments, and are exhausted by the time the interview is over.

"Hey, are you going back to the hotel already?" Kit asks you just as you walk back to the dressing rooms, and you deny it with your head.

"No chance, I'm leaving." You reply. "I'm going straight to the airport, I have a flight in two hours. What about you, Harington? Aren't you going home to see your wife?"

"I didn't know we were talking about wives." He jokes making you blush and look away. Kit didn't know about Lizzie, but he knew you had someone. "Of course I want to come home, but I still have some appointments here. And Rose is in Spain."

"That sucks, man." You comment and he murmurs in agreement, shrugging.

"Yeah, but longing sure makes the sex better." He retorts with amusement and you grimace before laughing.

"You're unbelievable." You joke before waving yourself off in farewell, turning in the direction of your dressing room.

As soon as you enter, you take your cell phone out of your pocket and try to call Lizzie, but it goes to voicemail. You leave a message saying that you can't wait to see her and get your things ready to leave.

After saying goodbye to the cast again, and taking a taxi to the airport, you receive a message, but it is not from Lizzie.

*Sara evil agent* sent you an attachment.

You frown at the matter. "Off-screen romance? Would GOT star Emilia Clarke be dating queer Marvel protégé?"

You call Sara the same minute.

"I literally said I wasn't dating her!" You complain as soon as she answers and hear Sara laugh on the other end.

"Oh, honey, I told you, the media loves a little gossip." She says. "And you need to stop setting up fake girlfriends so quickly, I can barely keep up."

You grumble in irritation and your agent lets out a giggle.

"Don't be so grumpy, it's just a rumor and the last time I checked you were a single woman so I don't see a problem." She says and you bite the inside of your cheek. Since your lack of excitement about GOT, Sara suspects something. Neither of you says anything, but you know she's not an idiot and figures you have a girlfriend. "Are you going back to LA already?"

"Yes, I'm catching my flight in an hour."

"I hope you're ready to record, Lady Vision." She jokes. "Your scene schedule is getting closer."

"I plan to rest this week." You warn, slightly distracted. "Game of Thrones really was something different."

"I just hope people like the ending."

You giggle and Sara wants to know why, but you don't give her any spoilers. After asking if everything was okay, and assuring her that you had eaten something before the interview, you hang up.

Lizzie didn't text you back and you fell asleep on the plane.

//-//-//-//-//

California, three years and eleven months ago.

Your heart was beating so fast that you could hear it in your ears.

But Lizzie's hand in yours was doing a good job of calming you down.

Maybe it was just because you had waited, or maybe it was because you were so much in love, but you don't remember feeling so nervous about the idea of having sex with someone. Not since your first time.

And well, now with Lizzie, it was actually only the first time you two were going to sleep together. You didn't have to be nervous, but you were.

Liz opened the bedroom door as soon as you two reached the room, and dragged you inside with her. You closed the wood as you entered.

The tension was palpable in the air, and you wondered if you stayed still long enough, she might hear your heartbeat.

You looked at her, your eyes locked on each other, and a shy smile on your lips as you approached, stopping inches from her body.

Lizzie holds her breath.

"Are you nervous?" You ask in a husky voice, raising your free hand to go around the length of her arm with your finger, admiring the way her skin shivers at your touch.

She just shakes her head and you smile, resting your hand on her cheek.

"It's just me." You comment as you lean your forehead against hers, and you both close your eyes in anticipation. "We can stop if you're not sure..."

"I'm sure." She interrupts half breathlessly, her hand tightening its grip before letting go of yours, so that she brings both hands to the sides of your neck. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." You assure before breaking the distance, bringing your mouths together in a firm kiss that draws a sigh from both of you as your hands move up to Lizzie's waist.

It doesn't take long for the kiss to deepen, your tongues fighting together and the sensation making your head spin and your body heat up.

Lizzie gasped against your mouth before parting for breath, and you used the opportunity to let your fingers run down to the hem of her shirt as you pulled it up. In motion the piece was off, and she copied the same to remove your blouse.

You bit your lip as you looked at the sight of Lizzie's exposed torso in front of you, her nipples hardening in the air making you feel the tightness beneath your stomach increase.

You lunged forward, grabbing her left breast with your mouth, and Lizzie let out a loud noise in her throat, throwing her head back as your tongue skirted her left nipple.

She was so hot and smelled so good, and the sounds she was making were driving you insane.

You moved your hands up to her breasts as soon as you brought your mouths together again, your tongue circling hers as you played with her hardened nipples, and it wasn't long before Lizzie began to whimper, closing her legs and thrusting her hips towards yours for more friction.

You smiled against her lips, you would give her exactly what she needed.

//-//

California, one year and nine months ago.

Leaving your keys on the counter, you were surprised by the silence as you entered.

It wasn't that you wanted Lizzie to stay late to wait for you, except that it was exactly what you wanted.

You left your bag on the living room floor and called her name twice before assuming she was asleep.

Sighing slightly, you went up the stairs to your room, but it was empty. All the other rooms were empty, which made you frown.

Okay, you didn't expect Elizabeth not to be home just the day you were returning, after months of not seeing each other.

But you didn't have much time to think about what might have happened, because a clearly drunk Lizzie stumbled into the house, fighting against the lock and her own balance just as you were coming down the stairs.

"You're drunk?" You ask in a voice in a mixed tone of disbelief and concern upon seeing her, and Lizzie is startled for a moment before giggling.

"Look who's here, California!" She announced to the room with irony and with open arms, stumbling inside. "Hollywood's most eligible bachelorette, watch out ladies and gentlemen."

You frowned at the little scene, Lizzie walked with difficulty to the kitchen as you finished going down the steps, she murmured quietly and you with your arms crossed, trying to understand exactly what was going on.

"What happened to you?" you ask as you follow her across the room, Lizzie takes off her shoes with difficulty, almost falling to the floor at least twice. When you make mention of helping her, she holds up her hand for you not to, and you are starting to get worried.

"I went to have fun." She replies with a humorless laugh. "I can have fun."

"Of course you can." You retorted with a raised eyebrow, watching Lizzie take a deep breath and close her eyes as she leaned her back on the countertop, probably getting a headache from the way she buried her face in both hands for a moment. "Who did you go with?"

"I don't know, Mom." She sneered wryly, and you clenched your jaw. Lizzie laughed at your expression, and pouted. "Oh, did I upset you? Sorry, darling, I'll try to be a good girl for you."

You shook your head slightly.

"Babe, what is happ..."

"Don't call me that." She cuts off quickly and you look at her in surprise. Lizzie closes her eyes and takes a deep breath and when she looks at you again, she has thick tears in her eyes and you feel your heart soar. "I saw the pictures on television, Y/N. I saw the pictures, I saw your interview, I saw the videos on instagram. And I guess I understand, because she's beautiful and we haven't seen each other in months but I thought you loved me..."

"wow, what are you talking about?" You interrupt, confused and frightened, and Lizzie looks like a complete mess. She is crying and you reach up to touch her face, and try to calm her down. "Babe, breathe, I don't understand."

She whimpers softly, and you wonder how much booze she really has consumed.

"You are going out with that woman and I love you and everything is horrible." She declares in a whiny voice and you look at her with a frown.

"Lizzie, what..."

But she pushes you and walks off toward the bedroom, and you try to keep her from falling over drinking at least three times until she can get up the stairs properly.

"Lizzie, wait, talk to me." You beg but she keeps walking and you enter the bedroom a moment after her, watching her walk to the closet and start throwing all her clothes out while mumbling about cheating.

You take a deep breath with your hands on your waist, letting out a humorless laugh. It was an absurd scene to say the least.

"Elizabeth Olsen, stop this immediately!" You command as soon as she steps out of the closet, and she widens her eyes slightly as she shifts the weight of her feet before veering to the floor. You sigh as you walk toward her. "Babe, look at me."

"No."

"Lizzie."

Reluctantly, she does so. You soften your expression, feeling your heart soar at the image of her face, longing invading your whole heart.

"God, I missed you." You confess half breathlessly and Lizzie looks on the verge of tears. "Darling, where did all this come from? I'm not seeing any other girl."

"I saw the pictures..."

"Lizzie." You interrupt seriously, shaking your head slightly as your hands land on her shoulders. "I have no one but you. I would never cheat on you, I don't know where that came from. I wish you hadn't drunk so much so we could have a serious talk."

Lizzie gives a mischievous little smile, her gaze half lost because of the alcohol.

"I'm not drunk." She mumbles clearly intoxicated, making you chuckle slightly.

"Of course not." You said as you pushed the loose strands of her hair behind her ears. "You made a mess in the bedroom, babe. Why don't you try to sleep while I clean up?"

Lizzie sighed, clearly tired but shaking her head in denial

"I don't want to sleep." She said as she brought her body closer to you, her hands squeezing your shirt. "I want you to fuck me."

You bit back a smile, looking at Lizzie with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, yeah?"

She murmured in agreement, her fingers trying to open the buttons of your shirt, but she was clearly in no condition to do so.

"I'd like that too, but you're drunk." You say as you move your hands to hold hers, smiling at the grumble of frustration she lets out. "Go lie down, I'll get some water."

"But..."

"Bed, Lizzie." You ordered again as you intertwined your hands to lead her to lie down.

She was reluctant a few times but eventually agreed and lay her down on the mattress, placing the comforter on top.

When you made mention of getting up, she held your hand.

"Don't go." She asked softly with her eyes almost closed. You smiled.

"Aren't you thirsty?"

Lizzie denied and pulled your hand, you moved closer to lie beside her and she wasted no time in entwining her body in yours.

You let your fingers run through her hair and she sighed lightly, not taking long to fall asleep. You waited a few more minutes before moving, getting out of bed as gently as possible so as not to wake her.

After collecting the clothes Lizzie had thrown across the room and putting them away in the closet, as well as putting the party clothes she was wearing in the wash, you went back downstairs, looking for your bag to take to your room.

Your cell phone vibrated as you walked up the stairs.

It was a message from Scarlet, and you laughed lightly as you read its content.

“I heard you're coming home today, right? Lizzie was really upset about the rumors that you were dating, and asked me to take her out for a drink. I dropped her off at home, but she was pretty shaky. I didn't know you two had a thing, can we talk about it over coffee tomorrow?”

You were relieved that Scarlett was the person accompanying Lizzie, but now she knew you two had something. You were tired of it honestly. The secret. All you wanted was for everyone to know how much you loved Lizzie. And judging from recent events, that was a problem for her too. Or at least it was enough for her to drink more than she should.

But you would have to wait until Lizzie woke up to have this conversation, so you went back to your room, and after putting away the clothes from your bag, you took a shower and put on your pajamas, wasting no time in joining Lizzie in bed again.

//-//-//

Caribbean, one year and six months ago.

Following the music, you continued to dance slowly, your hand around Lizzie's waist while the other was entwined in the air with hers.

The luxury hotel where you were staying that week was hosting a Hawaiian themed evening, and well, after spending the day in the pool area, you decided to dance a little.

In that moment, with Lizzie in your arms, you were at peace completely. Moments like these, like waking up with her in your bed, or cooking together, or rehearsing your lines while curled up on the couch under the blanket were more than enough to make you sure that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with Lizzie.

You smiled before pulling your body away slightly, just to look at her. And she looked back at you with the same adoration, her cheeks flushing slightly.

You spun her into your arms then, making her laugh as you pulled her back, your hands resting on her neck as your hips swayed to the rhythm of the ukulele of the band playing on the stage.

There were a few other couples around, but you could hardly notice anyone but Lizzie.

You continued dancing, and you rested your forehead on hers, closing your eyes and breathing in her perfume. Lizzie smiled, stealing a quick kiss before resting her chin on your shoulder, following the rhythm of the dance.

When the show ends, you follow the crowd in the clapping for a moment before Lizzie entwines your hands and pulls you toward the bar.

"That was fun." She comments with cheeks flushed from the dance, her smile soft as you stand near each other, your hands intertwined as you reach for the menu.

"Dancing with you always is." You retorted charmingly, releasing her hand only to fit it against your waist, drawing a chuckle from Lizzie.

You ended up sharing some drinks and snacks, and you were starting to feel higher with each sip.

Lizzie was in the middle of a joke when you interrupted her.

"Marry me?"

She blinked in surprise, a confused chuckle escaping her lips.

"What?"

Maybe it was the drinking. Probably not, because with the emerald eyes looking so intently, you suddenly felt very sober. Your heart raced too, but you were never more sure of anything than you were now.

"Marry me." You repeat with a confident smile. Lizzie blushes with wide eyes.

"You... Are you serious?" She asks in surprise, and you let out a sigh, moving closer to take her hands and put them down on your racing heart.

"I love you." You tell her with nothing but sincerity. "I want to spend my life with you. I was planning something bigger, perhaps, at your parents' summer house. I would get down on one knee in front of your family and hand over the ring I've been carrying for three months." You confess and watch her look at you in shock. "I've been waiting for the right moment, Lizzie. But I've just realized that every second with you is the right moment. I want you to be my wife. Do you want me to be yours?"

It took a second for her to react, her expression changing from shock to pure happiness, the tears appearing in her eyes and the smile so big it made her eyes small.

"Yes, yes, of course." She replied between one shy laugh and another, moving forward to kiss you over and over again.

You couldn't stop smiling as you kissed her, and you giggled against each other's mouths, pulling apart to embrace each other.

It didn't take long for the people around the bar to notice and start clapping, but you didn't care.

All you were seeing was your future wife.

//-//-//-//

California, 1 year and 9 months ago.

You finished putting the coffee jug on the tray, the last missing item, before carrying it to your room, taking careful steps not to trip over anything on the way.

Lizzie was already awake, but still in bed. The glass of water in her hands and the missing pill on her bedside table indicated that she was already treating her hangover.

"Good morning, darling." You greeted as you entered, walking over to the bed to leave the platter on top of the sheet next to Lizzie.

"You're home." She commented in a mixture of surprise and embarrassment, you just made a noise with your mouth as she sighed, running her hand over her face, probably because of her headache. "When did you get home?"

"Last night." You respond by watching her. "Just before you."

"Sorry." She says moving closer. You gently pull away from her attempt to kiss her lips, and Lizzie frowns. "What?"

"I was worried." You state seriously. Lizzie lets out a sigh, leaning her back against the bed completely. "I thought you were going to pick me up at the airport, but you didn't call. And then I find the house empty. Until you arrived, completely drunk at dawn."

Lizzie crossed her arms, looking away. It was your turn to sigh.

"What's happening, Elizabeth?"

"It 's nothing."

"Elizabeth."

"Stop it." She asks impatiently, turning her face to you again. "Don't call me that."

You just frown in confusion. "It's your name."

"No." She exclaims annoyedly, closing her eyes for a moment. "You only call me Elizabeth when you're angry. And you can't be angry at me because I have the right to go out!"

You watch her stand up, as if running away from the conversation, and you sigh impatiently, massaging your temple with your finger. Lizzie begins to remove her dress, clearly intent on going to take a shower.

"I never said you had no right to go out, Elizabeth." You retort ignoring the annoyed grunt she lets out at you continuing to call her by her full name. "I just think I have the right to ask why after we agreed on something, you changed plans at the last minute and decided to disappear."

"It's funny that you want to demand something from me when you've spent the last few months without giving me any satisfaction of where or who you were with!" She accuses angrily and you grimace in indignation.

"Oh, so it's about my work?" You retort angrily. "The last time I checked we had decided that I was going to record and come home. You said you were fine with that!"

Lizzie gave a humorless laugh, her dress falling to her feet as she worked to remove her bra.

"Well, you know what, I wasn't!" She shouts angrily, throwing the bra angrily into the closet. You need to remember that you are angry with her as you have the vision of her breasts exposed in front of you while she is yelling at you. "I didn't agree to the endless get-togethers with all those sluts around you! And I sure didn't agree with your flushed face on television flirting with Emilia Clarke in front of the whole country!"

You stared at Lizzie in shock, but she just grunted in irritation before turning to go to the bathroom.

"No, I think it's so funny you bring that up, you know, Elizabeth." You spoke aloud as you stood up to follow her. "Because when I said Aubrey Plaza was flirting with you, you told me it was just business. But suddenly, Emilia is something that bothers you!"

"God, this is so different from Aubrey!" she retorts in irritation, finally naked, before stepping into the shower. You were beginning to find it hard to remember why you were fighting now that you had the view of her wet silhouette in the shower stall, as she raised her voice to be heard beyond the sound of the water. "We were supposed to be flirting in the interviews, it was all for the movie. You were just falling all over Emilia for no reason. All those smiles and giggles." She declares angrily, making you bite back a smile. Lizzie naked, angry and jealous was hot as hell.

"I really can't believe we are having this conversation." You complain as you unbutton your pajama shirt. "The most absurd part of it all is you thinking I would have anything with anyone else."

"You say these things but don't live up to them with your actions." She retorts, annoyed. "I wouldn't think anything of it if you didn't flirt with other people!"

"I didn't flirt with anyone!" You return defensively, your blouse finally coming off. Lizzie's annoyed expression almost falters, but she keeps her gaze above your breasts as you take off your pants. "And honestly, none of this would be happening if everyone knew we were dating!"

Lizzie frowns, her anger finally dissipating with your sentence. You step into the shower stall with her, and she looks at you dubiously.

"You...you want to go public?" She asks, studying you as the water falls on her back. You swallow dryly, keeping yourself in front of her.

"Only if you want to."

Lizzie holds out her hand for you to take, and when you do, she pulls you gently until your breasts are almost touching.

"Do you think we're ready for that?" She whispers as your foreheads lean against each other. You sigh as you rest your hands on her waist.

"With you, I'm ready for anything, Lizzie."

She sighs against your lips, her hands moving up to your neck.

"I can't think about that with you naked in front of me." She mumbles before moving forward against his lips.

Kissing shouldn't feel this good.

You slide your tongue over hers a moment later, and you both sigh in need, feeling the effects of so much time apart. Your hands move down to her ass, squeezing the flesh and forcing her against you, and the direct contact of exposed skin makes Lizzie whimper.

You press her against the glass of the shower stall, feeling the shower water against your back as you hold your mouths together in a passionate, hungry kiss.

When air was needed, you ran your kisses down your girlfriend's exposed collarbone, enjoying the way she sighed in anticipation, her hand moving up to the back of your neck to encourage you.

"God, I missed you." You sighed before sucking on the sensitive spot on her collarbone, making Lizzie whimper as she dug her nails into your shoulder.

She pulled your face back to hers, kissing you urgently, and you pressed your body against hers, your hands moving down to her thighs and up so that she entwined her legs around your waist.

The contact of your exposed intimates together made you both gasp in the kiss, but you slid your tongue against hers again, savoring her taste as your hands moved up to her breasts, squeezing and cupping them with a full palm, your fingers playing with her hardened nipples and making Lizzie sigh wetly.

"What is it baby?" you teased when she was unable to keep up the pace of the kiss, throwing her head back as she felt your hands pressing her breasts hard, and Lizzie grunted as she bit her lips to keep from moaning, looking up at you with dark eyes, clearly struggling to keep her expression impassive. You smiled, pressing your hips forward and watching her close her eyes tightly, unable to contain a low moan that escaped her throat. "I want to hear you, baby."

"I'm still mad at you." She declares in an affected voice, and you murmur in understanding, lowering your face to her collarbone, and licking and kissing the skin, making her shiver.

"Is this angry sex, then?" You sneer as you move your hips forward again, the sensation bringing a rising wave of pleasure to both of you. "It doesn't seem like it."

Lizzie sighs impatiently, and puts her legs on the floor, pushing you away by your shoulder.

You are so stunned by the sudden break in contact that you barely have time to absorb her turning off the shower before she pulls you by the hand out of the stall.

You were about to ask what she was going to do, but she pushed you onto the bed, and disappeared into the closet.

"Lizzie?" You called out uncertainty, preparing your apology speech for what exactly you couldn't say. But she walked out next, and the sight made your mouth go dry. "Damn."

Elizabeth was wearing a strap-on, the rubber penis already fitted in the front and ready for use. And from the determined expression on her face, she was more than willing to prove to you that she was pissed.

"Fuck me." You breathed aroused by the view, and Lizzie gave a wry chuckle as she approached the bed.

"Oh, I will." It was her only warning before she broke the distance, kissing you fervently, her tongue exploring your mouth and pulling the air from your lungs, making you see stars.

You let out a low moan, moving your hands up to her waist to pull her to you, but Lizzie pushed your hands away, breaking the kiss and moving one hand up to your neck, squeezing lightly as she made you look at her.

"Knees, ass up." She commanded in a husky voice, her gaze glittering with lust, you bit your lips to keep from moaning again, feeling your pussy pulsate with desire as you obeyed, turning on the bed quickly as Lizzie positioned herself behind you. "I'll teach you not to flirt with other girls."

"I was n-fuck." Your speech turned into an horsy whimper as she suddenly penetrated you with the dildo, you were so wet that she had no problem at all, the toy slipping into your folds with ease, filling you completely. Lizzie chuckled breathlessly, her hands steadying your hips.

"God, you're so hot." She murmured, moving slowly inside you, the action making you clench your fists in the sheets and arch your back, your pussy clenching against the dildo.

"Fuck, Lizzie."

She thrust again, this time hard, her hands squeezing your hips as she went deep inside, making you moan loudly.

Before establishing a rhythm, she leaned against you, her hand coming up to your hair and pulling you back as she brought her mouth to your ear.

"You are mine." She whispered before she thrust hard inside you, making you moan. "Do you understand?"

"Not quite yet, try harder." You teased breathlessly, the pleasure at having the dildo all the way inside you making you half dizzy. Lizzie grunted angrily, this time stroking even harder, making you see stars as you whimpered, your body beginning to tremble.

"Quit being a brat or I'm going to fucking stop." She warned against your ear, thrusting more slowly this time, and you moaned breathlessly, barely able to keep your eyes open.

Lizzie set a slow pace, but thrusting hard as you moaned and whimpered, every time the dildo entered you making you even wetter and aroused, to the point that you were unable to hold back the loud moans, and she giggled.

"Look at you, a horny, begging mess." She sneered against your ear. "You are mine, and only mine."

She whispered, her strokes deep inside you. "I want you to remember that when you flirt with other girls. How good I make you feel."

You whimpered, your pussy clenching against the dildo for more, Lizzie keeping the strokes torturously slow. Seeing your state, she laughed softly, pulling out of you completely.

Before you had time to complain, she turned you over on the bed, spreading your legs as she bent down, thrusting deep inside you. Your moan died against her lips as she kissed you hard, laying against you as she buried the dildo inside you.

You could feel Lizzie everywhere. Her breasts against you, her lips on yours, and it was too much. She thrust hard again, deep and fast as you had your legs around her waist, and her tongue on yours, and you began to tremble in spasms, pleasure spreading throughout your body.

Lizzie smiled against your lips as you lost the ability to respond to the kiss, moaning and whimpering at the closeness of your climax. Her mouth moved down to your neck as she kept up the pace of the thrusts inside you, and your hands tightened around her waist, pulling on her hips for more friction.

It wasn't long before you fell over the edge, the tightness under your belly exploding, the pleasure spreading to the tips of your feet as you moaned against Lizzie's ear, crumbling under her.

As you tried to normalize your breathing after such an intense orgasm, she straightened to look at you, her eyes had adoration in them.

"You did so good." She praised against your lips. "Did you learn your lesson?"

"I did." You replied in a husky voice, taking a deep breath to control the effects of climax.

In one swift motion, you spun you two around on the bed, sighing as you felt the toy move inside you.

"Now you will learn to honor your appointments, Miss Olsen." You warned as your hands moved down to the latches of the strap, removing it as Lizzie bit her lips, looking at you with a mischievous gaze.

You shifted to remove the strap and toss the toy on the floor, returning to sit on Lizzie's lap, your mouth returning to hers immediately.

When she began to move beneath you, you smiled against her lips, pulling away as you rested your forehead against hers and let your fingers play with her wet entrance.

"Use your mouth." She asked breathlessly, her nails digging into your arm.

"My baby wants my mouth?" You teased, moving forward to lick her lips and pulling away with a short laugh when she moaned as she chased your mouth unsuccessfully. You circled her clitoris with your fingers, and Lizzie gasped. "The next time you want to get drunk, at least text me, my love." You warned as you penetrated her with two fingers at once, feeling her hot and slippery, while Lizzie moaned loudly against your mouth. "Do you understand?"

You removed your fingers, playing with her entrance until she nodded frantically, pushing her hips toward your hand. But you laughed lightly, pulling your hand away completely, and leaving her with a confused expression.

"I thought you wanted my mouth." You scoff, already ducking, as Lizzie looks at you expectantly.

"God, you always fuck me so good." Lizzie comments as you kiss her thighs, moving down. You smile against her skin, finally reaching her pussy.

You stare at her before moving forward, your tongue against her clitoris as she sighs with need.

"Don't torture me." She begs breathlessly, her wrists locked on the bed, you smile, lingeringly licking her, and she closes her eyes tightly.

"I won't, my love." You assure her before returning your mouth to her pussy, kissing her entrance before you begin to suck and lick, devouring her with desire.

She moans loudly, letting out affected sighs with each movement of your tongue inside her, and you hold her thighs to keep her open for you as you eat her out.

It doesn't take long for Lizzie to reach her edge, already near the limit from fucking you, but it's still delicious to have her crumbling against your mouth like a weeping mess, her orgasm on your tongue as she screams your name.

You climb your body back up onto her, and kiss her tenderly, unlike anything so far.

Lizzie is trying to control her breathing from the climax, but sighs in satisfaction as she tastes herself on your tongue.

As silence falls over you, you sigh lightly, your hands caressing her face.

"Are we okay, Lizzie?" You ask as you settle down to lie across from each other. She leans into the touch of your hands, as her hands come up to your waist.

"I don't know." She confesses. "But I want us to be."

You smile, using your finger to take a strand of hair from her face and tuck it behind her ear.

"Do you think going public will make us better?"

"I don't want to love you in secret anymore." She says and you feel your heart soar. "Do you understand?"

You smile. "Yes, babe. I feel the same way."

She gives a relieved smile, her gaze passionate. You break the distance, and kiss her gently.

When you break the kiss a moment later, you look quickly at your bodies. "I think we should have this conversation with clothes on." You comment and Lizzie giggles.

"Later. Now I show how much I missed you in my bed." She says before bringing your lips together again.

You certainly wouldn't object to that.

//-//-//

Atlanta, three years ago.

You hesitated at the entrance to the restaurant.

Through the window you could see Lizzie, and all your cast mates, as it was the closing celebration of the WandaVision filming.

You swallowed hard, the object in your pocket suddenly becoming too heavy.

You startled slightly when you felt a hand on your shoulder.

"I guess we're both late, huh?" Kathryn Hahn, your cast mate, remarked gently, putting her car keys away in her pocket clearly having arrived right with you.

You gave her a lopsided smile and she noticed your hesitation, assuming a worried expression.

"Everything okay?" She asked.

You shifted your gaze to the window again, watching Lizzie giggle shyly, her gaze shining slightly. She looked around too, searching, and you knew it was for you.

"Yeah, I just...I was just having a moment of doubt." You say still looking at Lizzie. Kathryn followed your gaze, and smiled, but didn't comment on it.

You sighed, reaching into your pocket and pulling out the object.

"Wow, are you going to...?" Kathryn asked in surprise but you gave a humorless laugh.

"No, I couldn't." You say swallowing dryly, and looking away from the velvet box. "I don't know if I'm ready."

"And when either of us are?" Kat returned, making you smile.

"How did you know you were going to say yes to your husband?" You asked next. Kathryn sighed thoughtfully.

"I didn't." She replied. "There's no way to know until you get asked. But what I did know was that I loved him. And that's what really matters."

You absorbed her words in silence, and then put the box back in your pocket.

"I think she loves me." You say. "That will be enough until I find the right moment."

Kat murmurs in understanding, and then pushes her shoulder against yours lightly.

"Just don't wait too long." She warns with a smile, nodding her head signaling for the two of you to enter the restaurant and join the rest of the team.

When you enter, any thoughts of Lizzie denying your marriage proposal are driven out by the image of her contented smile when she sees you arrive.

//-//-//-//

A/F/N> I'm not even gonna try to say this is the last time i'm continuing this work because at this point, I just know I don't believe my own words anymore haha. Tell me what you think people.

Tag> @imapotatao / @aimezvousbrahms/ @ensorcellme/ @helloalycia || @mionemymind / @abimess / @stephanieromanoff / @yourtaletotell / @tomy5girls / @justagaypanicking / @thegayw1tch / @idek-5 // @myperfectlovepoem // @helloalycia // @ENSORCELLME // @AIMEZVOUSBRAHMS // @drpepperobsessed // @sighsam // @olsensnpm // @sxfwap // @table57 // @madamevirgo // @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo // @emptysince18x // @xastrydx || @yuhloversxx || @ymzki-haruki || @wouldirunofftheworldsomeday || @lostandsearching || @lezzzbehonesthere || @musicinourlips || @chaekhan || @diaryoflife || @nervoustrack || @aquamarinescarlet || @cristin-rjd || @idamaemann || @fortunatelynerdylight

[spencersawkward]

omg I’m so excited you’re on here and taking requests!! do you think you could do something like baby Spence losing his virginity to a close friend & it’s like adorable, goofy, fluffy smut bc he cannot get over the fact that he’s actually having sex with someone

I’VE BEEN WAITIN FOR THIS ONE-- TURN IT UP!!!

on a serious note, i'm so glad you asked for this one bc i really wanna add a scene like this in the fic i'm working on rn. i'm v excited.

summary: when the secret of Spencer's virginity gets accidentally spilled in front of the whole team, reader goes to check on him.

word count: 5.6k

relationship: Fem!Reader/Spencer Reid

content warnings: unprotected penetrative sex, creampie, fluff.

masterlist

hanging out with the team is easily the best part of the week. after spending days in Arizona with our focus entirely on the most recent case, my mind is practically ready to snap. I feel like I've been running on fumes, and when Penelope suggested we take the evening to hit our favorite bar, I was practically already out the door.

so now I'm sandwiched between JJ and Emily as we throw back our first shots of the night. my skin is already flushed with the elation of laughter, the pleasant thrum of conversation that surrounds us.

"that's bitter." JJ makes a face when she slams the empty glass on the table. I screw up my nose.

"why did we pick vodka?" I hate vodka.

"it gets the job done." Emily laughs. I shudder at the aftertaste that sits on my tongue.

Morgan wanders over, Pen on his arm while she totes a brightly colored pink alcohol. they're flirting as usual, but she pauses in her witticisms to grab my arm.

"we're playing truth or shot in that booth over there." she says to me, then gets the attention of the other two women. I let out a disbelieving laugh.

"truth or shot? like truth or dare but without the dare?"

"Reid, is that you?" Morgan says sarcastically. I slug him in the arm with a pout.

"be nice." but I'm giggling. he loops his arm through mine and we head back to the table, Penelope already starting a new conversation with JJ and Prentiss as they follow. Spencer is sitting in the booth with an Arnold Palmer, sipping from the straw like it's his job. I slide into the spot next to him.

"hi, you." I smile. "I haven't seen you at all tonight."

he holds up his glass. "I don't really drink."

"that's fine," I wave it off. "I just meant I wanted to hang out with you."

"oh." he smiles a little. "sorry."

"no big deal. you're here now." I shrug and turn to Pen as she calls my name.

"I'm gonna order a bottle. that okay?" she points to the bar with a mischievous smile. glancing once at Spencer and his slightly awkward position between Morgan and me, I make a snap decision.

"you know what? I think I'll just have a lemonade."

"you sure? Jayge said you spent the whole plane ride back talking about getting wasted--" Penelope's words cause a blush to spread over my face. I cut her off.

"I'm sure. thanks, Penny."

she nods. "of course, sweet cheeks."

I focus back on Reid, who is looking at me gratefully. he would never say it out loud, but I know he feels a little out-of-place sometimes. it's hard enough for him to come out with us to bars; the least I can do is be a sober friend. I open my mouth to start a conversation about an article I read the other day when Prentiss speaks.

"okay, so... who's ready?" her voice, always so certain, carries over the table. all of us make enthusiastic noises of assent, and she grins as Penelope returns with an armful of glasses. Derek gets up to grab the actual alcohol, and then when we're all settled in, the game begins.

"the rules are simple: you tell the truth, or you drink!" the tech analyst explains. the stakes for Spencer and me are lower, but that doesn't really matter. I'm excited to hear the team divulge their secrets.

"I'll start." Prentiss doesn't even hesitate before she looks at Morgan. "Derek, are you still sleeping with that one woman from sex crimes?"

Morgan raises his eyebrows at the question, irises flitting between Emily and the rim of his drink. there's a slight smirk on his face; he knows what a player he is and he's okay with flaunting it.

"Ally? no." he sighs. "things didn't end well between us."

"what? why?" I ask, eyes widening before I look around at everyone. "who is this woman?"

"cool your jets, sparky." Morgan teases me. "only one question per round."

"I'll tell you later." Prentiss raises her drink in my direction and winks.

"uh, no no." Morgan attempts to stop her, but JJ interrupts him.

"speaking of things not ending well," she says loudly. "Pen, why did you and Sam break up?"

"well," Penelope sticks her tongue between her teeth as she thinks it over with a devilish smile. her lips are a ruby red tonight, bright against her pale skin and big eyes. "to be completely honest, he just wasn't... doin' it for me. you know?"

"like--?" Emily glances down at her lap. Pen nods quickly and I snicker. JJ looks awestruck.

"I thought it was going so well."

"it was, but..." Penelope seems to genuinely think this over before she speaks. "if it's right, it just clicks. and it never clicked with Sam."

"profound." I compliment, high-fiving the high-energy blonde. we giggle before she turns to me with a glint in her eye.

"oh, do I have a plan for you," she smirks. "tell me, Y/N: if you had to sleep with one person on our team, who would it be?"

"women included?" I clarify, my cheeks suddenly on fire. how come everyone got easy questions except for me? I'm really just biding time.

"of course." she nudges my shoulder. I mull this over for a minute. I could say the truth, but I don't think that would be the right thing to do. however ironic that is. given the situation, I do something which I have never been good at and which I don't enjoy doing: I lie.

"although all of you are catches," I preface. "I think I would probably pick Emily."

Prentiss almost chokes on her own spit as her head snaps to see my face.

"me?" she asks.

"low-pressure fun." I shrug, the stress of the moment rolling off my shoulders with the ensuing laughter of my team members. Spencer takes a sip of his drink and peeks at me from his spot before I focus my attention to JJ.

we go on like this for a while, our original plan of "truth or drink" really just turning into a game of "truth and drink." as our laughter gets progressively louder, our questions and answers get progressively more provocative. we get into risky territory towards the fourth round, and I can practically feel Spencer's discomfort radiating off of him. thank god everyone has been taking it easier on him with their questions.

that is, until Morgan hits about five shots and decides to throw him to the wolves.

"so, Reid," he asks. there's no malice in his tone and I'm sure he's not meaning to embarrass the boy genius, but the question makes me wince anyways. "have we made any progress on the virginity front?"

it's like a fucking pall over the table. Reid goes rigid in his spot, and JJ's protective eyes dart between him and Morgan. Penelope's jaw drops.

"wait, Reid, you're a--?" her voice is tender, not judgmental, but Spencer's cheeks turn pink and he looks at Derek with a hurt expression.

"not cool." he says, body shifting in my direction. his eyes communicate everything; without a word, I know what he wants. I scoot out of the booth, letting him slip by me to walk outside.

truly, I'm speechless. we all stare at his lanky frame push through the door, but nobody talks until at least fifteen seconds pass.

"what the hell was that, Morgan?" JJ asks.

"I thought everyone knew--" he throws his hands up. "I swear I wouldn't have said anything if--"

"why would everyone know that?" I feel myself get angry for Spencer's sake. "that's an incredibly personal thing, especially to him."

"that wasn't you, my love." Penelope's voice is soft, sobered by the incident that just occurred. the playful air at the table is officially ruined, and we keep glancing at the doorway like Reid will come back in and everything will be fine. he doesn't.

"I'm gonna go apologize." Morgan starts to get up, seemingly beginning to realize the weight of his words. it's one thing to ask about Reid's sex life in general; it's another to point out specifically the entire absence of it. Spencer doesn't seem to be bothered by most things, but this is different. my heart hurts.

we watch Morgan go, the women all looking at each other with worried expressions.

"I feel bad." Penelope says.

"y'know, Spence never told me that." JJ observes.

"he really trusts Morgan." Prentiss says what we're all thinking. Morgan has always been like a big brother to him, and being embarrassed in front of your co-workers like that can't be a pleasant feeling.

we sit in a relative silence for about five minutes until Morgan walks back into the bar. he pulls out his wallet and pays for the drinks, then walks over to us.

"I'm gonna go for a walk. do you need me to call you all cabs?" he asks. those dramatic brows are drawn low over his face, emphasizing his regret. I look between my friends and clear my throat.

"it's okay. I only had one shot about an hour and a half ago. I can drive everyone home."

"okay," Morgan sighs, his head turning briefly to the door before focusing back on us. "drive safe, ladies."

and then he's gone.

"you guys ready?" I start to shrug my jacket on. they all nod and we get ready to go.

...

sitting in my apartment later that night, my head is swimming. even though it's none of my business what happens in Spencer's sex life, I wish I could tell him that it's okay. nobody cares at all if he's a virgin or not. but I know it's still embarrassing.

I hate that I lied earlier tonight, too. I wanted to say Spencer's name when they asked who I wanted, because I meant it. we're close, and I will always love him as a friend. but I've also always wanted more.

nobody, not even any of the other BAU women, know about my crush. I didn't want it to get in the way, or for it to come out and ruin my friendship with Reid. he doesn't like me like that, and that's fine, but what's not fine is not having him as my friend.

he was the first person I really connected with when I came here, and I feel a little protective over him, too.

once the clock hits eleven, I consider calling. he’s definitely not asleep yet. Spencer is a night owl. normally at this time he'd be curled up with a huge book, reading impossibly fast.

when he picks up on the third ring, the air leaves my lungs.

"Y/N?" he asks, more surprised than anything else.

"hey, Spence--" I hesitate, suddenly not sure what to say. sorry Morgan told everyone you're a fucking virgin? “do you wanna come over?"

maybe if I see him face-to-face, I'll be able to collect my thoughts better. the words hang in the air, festering over the line until I'm just about to take them back, before he replies.

"y-yeah. I'll be there in fifteen minutes."

my hands are shaking at my side when I open the door for the tall genius. he's still wearing his outfit from earlier, hair slicked back like normal. I've settled for my usual sweatpants and t-shirt winning combo. it's not like he cares.

"hey." I smile, trying to read his micro expressions. there are two possible outcomes here, knowing him: either he's going to be totally, completely over it, or he'll be able to write a War-and-Peace-length book on why he's upset.

"hi." he gives a wan smile and I let him into my apartment, closing the door behind him and gesturing to the couch.

"I missed this place." he says absently, looking around at the mess of decor and case files. I snort as I recall the last time he was here. he wanted to borrow a book that I had, and we ended up watching an entire docu-series about homing pigeons. it was surprisingly interesting; mostly because his commentary is both informative and funny.

"it missed you." I anthropomorphize my living space, but the phrase hangs heavy. I'm worried about him. I'm always worried about Spencer. he turns to look at me, opening his mouth to say something. I brush past him and walk into the kitchen. "coffee?"

"sure." he follows me like a lost puppy, leaning against the counter while I pull out two mugs and get to work.

"hey," I pause for a moment to look him in the eyes. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry-- about what happened... tonight."

"oh, that?" he scoffs, waves it off unconvincingly. "it's fine."

I raise my brows the slightest bit, never breaking eye contact. he wouldn’t have come if he didn’t want to talk about it. he cracks easily.

"it's just embarrassing, you know?" he says, staring out my kitchen window to alleviate his own nerves. I gesture for him to follow me back into the living room and I sit down criss-cross applesauce on the couch. he mirrors me, kicking off those cute black Converse.

"I don't think the fact itself is embarrassing, but I totally get why it feels that way. he shouldn't have said anything." I nod.

"like, that's personal. a-and--" he hesitates a moment, gesticulating wildly now. "and it's not like he's got any right! at least I don't go around with so many girls that I forget their names."

the thought of Reid sleeping with that many women is a little bit funny, but it also makes my stomach twist with jealousy.

"did he apologize?"

"yeah, he did. and he was drunk, I know." he rolls his eyes. "I'm overreacting."

"no, really, you're not." without thinking, I scoot closer to him and place my hand over his, which is sitting on his knee. I remember that Spencer is usually pretty averse to touch, but when I move it back to my lap, he seems a little disappointed. I wonder if he gets lonely.

"is it weird?" the question sounds raw, like he's mustering a lot to hear my response. I shake my head immediately.

"well, for one, Spence, I would never judge anyone based on their sex life, period." I chuckle. "and two, no way! if you aren't into having sex at this point in your life-- or ever-- that's totally your choice and you're entitled to it."

his eyes meet mine, pools of honeyed hazel that swim with a slightly amber shade. his face is so pretty, it's sometimes unbelievable to me that he doesn't get more action. bone structure that would make a sculpture envious.

"that's the thing," he licks his lips nervously before averting his gaze again. "I am interested-- I just don't-- well, I don't--"

"don't have someone to do it with?" I suggest with a slight smile. he nods, then clarifies.

"girls don't really seem to be interested in me."

I let out a laugh, unable to contain myself. his head jerks up to frown in confusion. I’m quick to amend myself.

"Spence, that's not true at all. you're such a catch! you're sweet and funny and way smarter than anyone I know. not to mention that you're adorable." I compliment, letting some of the thoughts I've been keeping to myself bubble to the surface. "any girl would be beyond lucky to be with you, sexually or not." Spencer blushes at my words, but the squirming in his spot tells me that it makes him feel warm inside. he smiles a little.

"you think?" it's genuine. he appreciates being praised, and it makes my heart flutter when he gives me that expression like I've made his night.

"I know." more of what I want to say rolls around my mind, unsure of whether or not I should admit it. but I think that right now, it'll only serve to make him feel better. "actually, I should tell you something."

"what?" he's curious now.

"when we were at the bar and Penelope asked who I'd be with... on the team... I lied."

"okay." he nods, somehow not connecting the dots. I guess it doesn't matter if they've got enormous IQs; boys are still clueless.

"I was gonna say you." the truth presses from the inside out, lifting a weight off my chest now that it's out there. even if he doesn't return that feeling, I'm suddenly glad that I told him.

"me?" he gestures to his narrow chest. I nod.

"yeah. I didn't wanna make you uncomfortable or embarrass you in front of our friends." I explain. he breaks into a grin.

"thanks." like I've given him something. I feel myself smiling as well, and then we're just looking at each other. tension that neither of us is willing to break. as much as I'd like to take him right here right now, he hasn't said anything about actually having sex or even about being attracted to me. for all I know, he could be completely indifferent.

"listen, Spence--"

"would you be willing to--" we speak at the same time, both of us stopping and laughing awkwardly.

"sorry, you go first." I offer, and he pulls his bottom lip between his teeth.

"would you want to... um..." he scratches the back of his neck before his eyes meet mine. "try it?"

"sex?" I raise my eyebrows. he nods. I try to find the right response. that’s more assertive than I expected. my pulse is fast, daring me to tell the truth. "I mean-- yes, I would love to-- but are you sure you want it to be with me, Spence? what about a girl that you like?"

"you are a girl that I like." he says this like it's matter-of-fact, like it's obvious. my heart stops in my chest before it starts to hammer.

"really?" a smile makes its way onto my face.

"I thought you knew."

"no." I laugh. my chest is full of sunlight.

"well, you are."

there's a brief silence where I try to get myself back on track. he likes me, too.

"are you sure you want to do this?" I glance at the space between our bodies, which has grown steadily smaller over the course of our conversation. Spencer is watching my every move with an intensity that tells me he's nervous.

"yes." he's unwavering.

"okay, well, you've kissed girls, right?" I inch closer. he nods.

"one."

"oh, Spencer," I sigh contentedly. "I have so much to teach you."

right after I say this, Spencer shifts uncomfortably in his seat. it's only then that I notice his hand covering his lap, the erection that's forming beneath his pants. my eyes flick up to his hungrily.

"sorry." he apologizes.

"don't be." our faces are inches apart and he's practically holding his breath. "I'm gonna kiss you. is that okay?"

"yes." he replies immediately. I place my hands gently on the side of his face, admiring the softness and sharpness of his jaw when I pull him to me, kissing him with a suppressed desire. his mouth is soft against mine, a little anxious to move. after a moment, he starts to relax.

his lips part and I deepen our contact, tilting my head and keeping it mostly mild at first. I don't want to shove my tongue down his throat. our knees are touching and his hand hesitantly finds my waist, the other going to run through my hair. I sigh into him, his fingertips a new sensation that I adore.

Spencer begins to give in a bit more to himself, asserting himself in the kiss and slipping his tongue over my bottom lip. I almost laugh at how quickly he gets the hang of it. he reads my body language effortlessly, not even skipping a beat when I climb into his lap and lace my arms around his neck.

"is this okay?" I pull away momentarily. he nods.

"you're so pretty." an unrelated response, but appreciated nonetheless. I laugh and peck his nose.

"thanks." and then we're back to making out, his hands resting on the small of my back. it's nice. I could stay like this forever, just pressed against Spencer while my fingers thread through his soft hair. he's cautious with me, and it's innocent.

I can feel his boner, can feel from the eagerness of his kisses that he's trying not to bring up the fact that he's literally just throbbing in his pants right now. in order to give him a little of what he wants, I start to rock my hips against his.

Spencer whimpers into my mouth. I stop and look down at him.

"do you want me to stop?"

"no, god, no— never stop." he's mindless in his reply, already grabbing my hips greedily and trying to regain that friction. I shake my head with a chuckle, then resume my actions. he starts to rut up against me, groaning into our embrace while his hands get more adventurous.

I withdraw, breaking the kiss to straighten up. he doesn't stop the microscopic pushes of his hips. I bite back a smile, enjoying the friction, too.

"do you wanna take my clothes off, Spence?" I ask softly.

"y-yes." he replies, gingerly taking the hem of my top and beginning to lift it over my head. when he places it on the couch beside me, his eyes immediately fall to my bra. slender fingers run up my bare waist, his watch glinting in the candlelight. when he doesn't immediately reach to unclasp my bra, I grab his wrist and guide it to the clasps myself. he moves with a surprising ease, unsnapping the thing and grazing over my skin as he slides the straps down my shoulders. I can tell that he’s shaking a tad, but it doesn’t hinder him.

the second that he's discarded the lingerie, he looks up at me with moony eyes.

"can I... kiss you?" he looks at my bare chest. "here?"

"of course, Spence." I nod. he presses his lips to the space between my ribs, drags them up to the valley between my breasts. lingers, then attaches himself to one of my nipples. I sigh, throwing my head back at the way he moves intuitively, sucking and running his tongue over the peak. he squeezes the other breast, plays with the nipple and starts to acquaint himself with the curves of my body.

the whole time, he's straining against my core, rutting helplessly in pleasure. it feels heavenly, with that sweet face of his so devoted to making me feel good, that I nearly stray from the purpose of the experience.

"Spencer..." I breathe. he moans at the sound of his name, then looks up at me from his place sucking on my tits. his teeth graze of my skin and I buck into his lap, causing him to groan appreciatively. my fingers tangle in his soft hair.

"Y/N," he pulls away from my chest, his lips making a soft popping sound. I gaze down at him, a bit lost in the fantasies running through my head. he's a natural. "can we, um-- like, expedite this process a little?"

"expedite the process?” I repeat back to him, giggling at his formality.

"what?" his voice goes up an octave, but he's smiling. "you know what I mean."

"I really do." I lean down, pressing my thumb into his jaw and angling his face up to mine to kiss. while his hands curiously move over my body, I start to push down the waistband of my sweatpants. I break contact just for a moment to peel them off, and he releases a quiet whine. it's cute.

"come back." he says softly, watching as I slide the bottoms down my legs, leaving me in my panties.

"I'm back." I peck his cheek, climb into his lap again. "can we take off your clothes, too?"

"mhmm." he nods. his lips part when my fingers work at the buttons of his shirt, undoing them with a torturous slowness. I can feel his eyes on my face the whole time.

"what?" I chuckle, peeking up at him for a moment before I pull his shirt open and run my palms up his chest, over his shoulders. he nearly shudders at the sheer touch.

"I just can't believe this is actually happening." he smiles in that way of his, like he's suppressing the depth of his emotions, with his brows slightly raised. I take the opportunity to enjoy the sight of him before me, his rapidly rising and falling chest, the smoothness of his skin.

"honestly?" I start to unbutton his pants, and he jerks up into my hand, blushing once he realizes the earnestness of his actions. I smirk encouragingly. "me, neither."

before I pull down his boxers, my eyes flick to his. "is this still okay?"

"Y/N," he groans. "if you don't do something, I'm gonna cum too early." he squeezes his eyes shut for a moment when my hand moves over his clothed erection, like he's holding on. "please."

"sorry." I release him from the confines. it hits his stomach and he waits for my reaction, as if he's afraid that I'll change my mind right now. but I'm definitely not going to. "holy fuck, Spencer."

"what?" he panics slightly, sitting up more. "is it not enough?"

"not enou--" I stutter, almost laugh. "no, it's plenty. I had no idea..."

"oh." he hides the pleased smile on his face, blush spreading over his pretty throat. in the interest of "expediting the process," I wrap my hand around the base of his cock and gently pump him.

Spencer's stomach tenses and he grabs onto the cushion of the couch with a tight fist, sighing.

"mmm..." he doesn't try to word his emotions, but I know. and I like that I'm making him feel this way, sharing this experience. Spencer and I are such close friends, I never thought we'd actually have sex. my assumption was that I'd watch him grow into himself, find a nice girl and treat her like a queen.

but here I am, spitting into my hand before jerking him off to prepare for what’s next. he’s throbbing, sounds coming from his throat.

"I'm gonna sit on it, okay?" I lean down to whisper in his ear. he touches my waist, my neck, kisses a random spot on my chest in the waves of pleasure that I'm giving him.

"o-okay." he mumbles, waiting for me to actually do it. and there's a moment of tense anticipation between both of us, when I sit up and pull my panties to the side. Spencer watches like I'm the only thing in the world, saving the memory of my body on top of his for later.

I run the head of his cock along my entrance, soaking him in the wetness between my thighs. I didn't realize how turned on I'd already gotten, and he lets out a quiet whine when he feels the evidence of how much I want him.

our eyes lock when I sink down. it's a new feeling for him, and the shape of his member as it stretches my walls causes me to bite my lip to withhold moaning too loudly. he whimpers, neck tensing and fingertips digging into my hips.

"o-oh." he sucks in a breath as I reach the halfway point. he's so big, I have to go slow in order not to overwhelm myself. but it feels good, too. like... unbelievably good. I grip onto his shoulders and my head falls forward into his shoulder.

"Spencer, holy shit." I moan.

"does it feel nice?" he asks, concerned for my own pleasure. I feel my chest flutter at the thoughtfulness of the boy wonder even when he's in the midst of losing his virginity, and I lower myself onto the rest of him.

"mhmm," I rest for a moment. "how do you feel?"

"like--" his breath hitches when I begin to rock back and forth on him. "like I've been missing out."

I can't help the giggle that slips past my lips, but then it quickly turns into a longing moan when he starts to thrust up into me like a helpless thing. Spencer is brilliant, but his brain cells go out the window when he throws his head back and begs me to move more.

I nod, raising and lowering myself until we reach a special pace. it's not fast or slow, just the two of us trying to stay in the moment while we hold on tightly to each other. I can feel the cool metal of his watch when he splays his hand out over my spine, the warmth of his breath while he pants against my shoulder.

he hits my g-spot over and over. my moans are torn from my throat by the burning of my lungs. it's like I can't breathe because I'm so focused on chasing the orgasm building in my stomach. and Spencer... I can tell he's almost finished.

the erratic nature of his jerking body tells me.

"I'm gonna cum..." he moans into my neck. "do- do you want me to pull out?"

"no." I arch my back and throw myself into the friction of our bodies. he stares up at me while I ride him, the merciless grinding of my hips because I just can't help myself. "oh my god, Spencer."

he notices how close I am and, in a surprisingly deft move, slides two fingers over my pussy to find my clit. the ensuing noise from me tells him that he's found it, and he begins to rub in quick circles. it's rough and hard, but that's exactly what I need right now.

"cum for me, Spence." I breathe. his free hand grips onto my thigh and pulls me over him, his own words unintelligible within the sounds of absolute pleasure.

"please." he begs for something I don't know, spills his seed inside of my pussy and holds onto me like I'm an anchor to this world while he peers into the next. the feeling of him spreading through my stomach, along with the reckless movements of his limbs and the way he looks at me while he rides out his orgasm, sends me over the edge.

"oh my fuck!" I collapse, grabbing his shoulders tightly and rolling myself down while he removes his fingers from my body. it's jarring, the intensity, like my normal functions can't respond correctly. all I can process is the tightening of my stomach, the pleasure between my legs, vision going slightly fuzzy at the edges. he moans when my cunt flutters around him, the muscles trying desperately to hold him here with me forever. I take deep breaths and slow down, my forehead dropping again while I start to remember my own name.

neither of us speaks. I think I'm still too in shock about what just happened, but in the best way. he keeps running his hands over my skin, then wraps his arms around my torso so that I'm pulled against his chest. I smile, kissing his ear before I finally break the silence.

"hi."

"hi." he's got a satisfied tone.

"do you need anything? water?" I ask, exhausted but realizing that this is still new for Spencer and it's my job to make sure he's as comfortable as possible. he nuzzles his nose into my clavicle and squeezes me tighter.

"stay here with me." there's a slight edge to his words. he's afraid of me leaving. I snuggle down, perfectly happy to remain. heat radiates from his skin, and I like the way it feels.

"of course."

we linger in each other’s arms, both of us coming back into the real world and holding on in an attempt to soften the blow. I just had sex with Spencer.

"thank you." he whispers into my hair.

"for what?" the smile on my face is lazy.

"for doing this."

"well, I really wanted to." I laugh. "so, I guess, thank you, too."

"you're quite welcome." his response is cheerful and then we're both laughing, the sound rumbling from his chest. "can we do it again at some point?"

"I would be happy to." I beam. the contented sigh that leaves his lips, followed by a slight sinking of our bodies down the couch in collective exhaustion, fills me with a joy that's quiet but obvious.

“I’ll last longer next time, I promise.” he says. I can practically hear the blush in his cheeks.

“you did amazing, Spence. don’t worry about it.” I press a few stray kisses to him.

I'll need to go clean up, soon, but it can wait a few more minutes. this is my favorite place on earth.