#i am trying to remember that bad art is still art

[moonstarsunplaneta]

Watching the hotel room scene with Tashi and Art and more and more I feel that Art was the one trying to make this personal while Tashi wanted it to keep profesional. And I think he was doing this because he desperately wanted a reason to feel again something,to play and win. That is why he was asking :" tell me it doesn't matter if I win tomorrow? Tell me if you would love me no matter what" " I am playing for both of us". While Tashi is the one wanting to keep the things professionaly :" you are the professional competitor",it must matter to him,not her ,"it can't be about avoiding my judgement" " I am your coach,I work for you".

Until Tashi finally made it personal and told him about leaving him,but did it help? I don't think so,that is why they reacted in that way and why Art was so sad and crying and Tashi with feelings of unease,it didn't work. And we see it the next day,Art is still not feeling tennis,even if she told him that,we are not seeing even a little bit of 6 grand slam winner Art Donaldson in that match against Patrick. And I think that is one the reasons she called Patrick,not just because she lived tennis trough Art,or for not fulfilling her ultimatum,or to fuck Patrick,as she said she felt winning against Patrick as Art had never did before,he could feel confident again,feel tennis again and even if he retired,it would be in his terms. She is taking care as she said to Patrick in his car.

And Tashi felt resentful about this, because she had to do that,like we don't think about how humiliating must be for Tashi to ask Patrick to lose,to show how bad Art and she are,she is asking him to save them,but she was still willingly doing it because she cared. She said in the scene when they were watching the match Art lost that she couldn't do that for him,giving his confidence back,but she is still here trying.

I even think Art isn't even sure about the retirement,that is why he wanted a reaction from Tashi when he told her,like yeah he lost his passion for tennis but I think he also wanted to have it again,he is tired not just of tennis but feeling that way,he is in a losing streak because he lost his passion,after a surgery,the brutal ,demanding,consuming life of a elite tennis player and confidence issues but also it isn't just a cause -effect thing,but a vicious cycle where his defeats made him less confident, tired and with desire to give up and retire and then he loses again... If retirement is what he really wanted and Tashi isn't confronting him,when that must be his biggest fear,why Art didn't feel any type of release at all ?

I remember their first scenes and how Tashi asked him two times " what do you want?"in different tones ,she gave him the option of retirement or continuing being tennis player and he didn't answer really what he WANTED,may be he didn't even know. They are fighting with this battle for some time after the injury,the hotel room scene is the lowest point.

[araekni]

There’s a little girl in my head & she screams “unloved! unloved! unloved!” every moment of my life

— @heavensickness (x)

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 5: Flip Slip.

(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 4.5)

[dawnsies]

Since I've been jojoing it up lately, I figured I should bring my old Part 4 OC from 2020 back and revamp her

I first created her before CDDH was announced, so does that mean I technically predicted Hol Horse being in Morioh? ;P

[artandsomethingcreated]

Manta momma and the odd baby.

I actually thought i posted this here? But apparently not? lol.

This was the first art i spent a long time on and finished! I spent a month on it back in 2022. I even got it prented last month so i can look at it on my wall!

[buttercupshands]

I guess the moral of this story is... idk roll whatever the character will be there... eventually

it's not the "season 6 recruit" it's literally the anniversary one

I think getting fun stuff under the cut is better, I'm still figuring it out and with only 30 tags there's only so much that I can tell without running out of them

and getting another Tomura is like a celebration, after a very struggling day of painnnnn

Presents are one of the best way of farming crystals so I didn't really touch them for characters I already levelled trust with

but it's a special occasion.

"the kindergarden"

I need to level Kurogiri up one day, but Tomura now takes full priority (ignore the event one I was burnout of the game when it came out and I didn't get the new UR Izuku back then if I remember correctly so he's weak)

I'm a bit pissed off that AFO is a bit more levelled up for now but that's because levels from 4 to 6 are pain and it's not the main/hard quest bonus time yet

but! at least I already have full LoV trio levelled up as much as I could so it'll be easier than before

decided to revive this team set up just for fun, I don't use them usually this one is basically "PLF war + season 6 stuff" because I don't have anyone else like any s5-s6 Izuku, for example. Also I don't have some cool memories which is sad because they look so cool

it's so funny to be a f2p in this game because it's literally pointless but I have so much fun

Also I think we never got the white hair Dabi memory??? the memory that has somewhat good stuff for him is him with black hair

anyway this was really weird

[thevegetablewhichnoonedaresname]

.

[piningpercussionist]

hey hi uh would you be able to check if y'all have The Land Before Time IV back in stock yet?

Sure thing- one moment.

*Kim turns to the monitor and pulls the keyboard a little closer to herself before she starts typing away. After a minute, she slides it back to it's original spot and turns back to the customer.*

It looks like we do, yeah. It should be in our Kids and Family section- let me know if you need help finding it.

[bibiana112]

I have no idea how to phrase it but being on the older end out of the students in this class and seeing a lot of the ones that just left highschool struggling with very similar stuff than I did (because no one in this course is cishet and neurotypical) and then seeing them come to me for support with all that stuff just because I'm outspoken about my experiences and somehow signaled that I'm safe enough of a person to come to all in the third week of class is so much I don't know how I got here but I'm so glad I did

[weaselishmcdiesel]

RRAR

[enden-k]

im sorry if i sound whiny and im sure the person didnt mean to but its somewhat of a trigger:

please dont talk to me bluntly about children being r*ped and child abuse in general, even if its "just" sea otters

[marblerose-rue]

SHOULD i draw dove + ivy rq just so i can have something concrete of their designs on my pc

EDIT im just gonna do it it'll be super simple tho

[drrksaturday]

Nobody asked but I finished and submitted my bachelors thesis : ) that's my life update before I go back into finals cramming mode

[inkskinned]

you found out today that a phrase you have used before was coined by an abusive man. this felt like getting your teeth taken out. it made you sick and sad and tired, but not surprised.

bad people tell you to be careful when you talk badly of bad men, that it could "ruin" a life. you had your life ruined by a bad man, not that it ever matters to them. your real life having real consequences is not valued as highly as the potential of his future.

this has always been a frustrating little mathematics problem for you. you've missed school and had to call out sick at work and had panic attacks that lasted for weeks. it stole sleep and food and friends from you. you cried in public, fucked your relationships up. and the whole time: your present has never mattered so much as the great what if! of his future. like - one life (your life) is already ruined, should we really ruin two?

so you live with the consequences and he doesn't, and that's just like, something you need therapy for. you once discussed this with one of your friends over coffee. she chewed the wooden stirrer, looked off into the distance. "once i became a victim, everything that happens to me afterward is automatically less interesting in the eyes of the general public. it is always about him. he changed my identity. to survivor. to statistic. meanwhile this whole time - i am a person."

you learned in college that three out of five of your favorite artists and authors were actually abusive assholes. these days, you are no longer surprised. oh, is that what was happening behind closed doors? of course it was, he was a "genius," and she was just a girl. you are talking about him in art history, so obviously his career was absolutely ruined, for eternity. that's what happens, right? they strike your name from the record and refuse to remember you? nobody really knows her name, but hey. that's what you get for being close to celebrity.

you got into an argument about it, which was a bad argument, because it made you cry. he said what, you want us to just ignore all the things this man did because he made a few women uncomfortable? and you'd balled your fists up and choked on it. later, in bed, you agonized over the response you'd been trying to articulate but never found the right moment to deploy: you are ignoring what any person could do if they weren't being fucking abused. maybe her talents far exceeded his and she was just never allowed to fucking use them. maybe we only see genius in white men because they purposefully fucking squash and silence any other people with talent.

but you'd cried about it instead of saying that, because you are the cost. you are the talent and potential that he took. you used to be brave and smart and clever and unafraid. like a lich, he stole years of your life.

quiet on set made you sad and sick and tired, but not surprised. unfortunately, one of the things he said was true: an entire network of people allowed it to continue. this is not news to you, because you have seen entire networks of people make the same fucking excuses when the same thing or-worse happened to you. and your particular story isn't even in hollywood. it was just a guy. it was still difficult getting people to stand up for you.

you and your friend wait in line for your coffee. like a standup joke, one man turns to the other and says "can't wait for every bitch to come crawling out of the woodwork complaining about harassment. it's another metoo." and you think - oh, that's the network. your boss tucks her hair back and whispers that while your skirt is cute, you're giving the boys the wrong idea. that's the network. when you'd told your "friend" about what happened, she'd said oh you must have misunderstood, that would never happen. and that's the network.

you woke up this morning panting, because years later you still have panic attacks. oh, it's not a network, actually, it's a web. and you, little moth: are you still surprised you're caught in it?

[etherealkissed88]

how i manifest when i feel anxious •°. *࿐

i decide i have what i want…

when i feel anxiety -> i let it pass while knowing its only a human reaction

◦ since i am beyond just a human (i am limitless imagination/self), i know any anxiety is below me and it has nothing to do with my limitless self. i have exactly what i decided i have, regardless of any anxiety.

know anxiety usually comes from a fear of failure

◦ so, i cannot limit myself based on what i see or what i negatively assume my future will look like bc i am always beyond the 3d, no matter what feelings/anxiety my human self experiences.

◦ i become indifferent/i dont care about what i see or what i assume i will see because i know everything comes together in the 3d once i change self/know its done. fact: everything always comes together and works out in the end. being indifferent to the 3d = being indifferent to emotions, anxiety and everything that doesnt serve you.

dont fight it, dont avoid it, tackle it head on

◦ acknowledge you are experiencing anxiety bc you are. yes it can feel like shit but it doesnt have to affect who you are being (whatever version of self you are embodying). again, i can choose to be indifferent to this anxiety. you dont have to be scared of the anxiety. it is a natural human response. cry if you need to, let it all out. dont try to suppress it bc that will only come to bite you back in the ass, believe me.

◦ take care of your mental health in whatever ways necessary. when i used to experience anxiety, i used to take walks in the park, clear my head, meditate, express myself and my emotions through art and journaling, etc. remember nothing you do (or feel) in the 3d has to affect who you are being/your state.

"how can i still have anxiety yet still be a desired version of me?"

anxiety has no affect on anything unless you allow it to change your identity. you are the one with power, the anxiety is only an experience, similar to breathing in oxygen and using our sense of touch; its all neutral. when you start surrendering to the anxiety, you are creating and accepting negative stories that you create based on the feeling of anxiety. allowing that anxious feeling to change your state/identity is surrendering to something you view as more "powerful" than you. stop transforming that anxiety into a state that you embody based on the false, negative stories u imagine.

remember a 3d experience or anxious feelings doesnt have to influence who you are being. an example: a model who knows (fulfilled) that she is graceful and beautiful can have anxiety about doing her catwalk. the anxiety is normal, she can experience the symptoms of anxiety (shortness of breath, dry mouth, shaking) but her core identity/state is still a graceful model. the anxiety is only a temporary feeling. usually when we experience these feelings, they occupy all of our attention in that moment which is why it seems so scary but in reality, its not that big a deal. know that anxiety is just a feeling. you are safe. you can still experience shitty feelings while knowing you are a bad bitch!

you dont always identify with everything you experience. for example, a lot of people experience good things and still identify as people who are unworthy of good things. so its really up to you to choose what to identify with.

i know my only job is knowing its done

◦ if i just decided its done, as the operant power, as i say goes, therefore its done. so my job is done. anxiety is part of the 3d, not my limitless self, imagination. so i can be indifferent and experience it without identifying with it, the same way people manifest what they desire while experiencing their shitty circumstances daily (because they do not identify with those shitty experiences).

◦ ive heard/experienced situations where we know its done yet we cried and felt like shit, and what we wanted still manifested into the 3d. bc anxiety is only a feeling. do not allow your feelings to take hold of your state, but if it does, its never the end of the world... just get back in the state. 3d shit/anxiety doesnt have to intervene with who you are being/what you identify with.

kisses, jani ☆

[vesrin]

😖