#i cannot even fathom what would happen between these three

[ampersandd7]

you know that one meme for comfort characters

[oharababe]

CONCEPT 02 －professor rivalry with miguel

professor! miguel o'hara x professor! reader mature: just the two of them bickering. wc: 581 academic rivals to potential situationship.

Molecular Biology and Genomics; two subjects of science that interlink with each other. But unfortunately, you and Miguel do not.

The two of you have this competition in the subjects you both teach your area of interest is molecular biology, whilst Miguel's is genomics. Both of you are professors at Neuva York Institute and this rivalry started back when you and Miguel started as students. Competing for the same grades, trying to come up with impressive projects and research and challenging each other when it comes to critical thinking and debates. Even now as alumni and professors of NYI, the fire between you and him hasn't extinguished. 

You and Miguel always clash when it comes to the subjects you both teach. There isn't a day that goes by where neither of you would miss out hearing each other's name in the classes you both teach. "Oh? Professor O'Hara said that learning about the ACGT bases is just a child's play?" You repeated, nodding to yourself as you tried not to sneer in front of your students. It's not their fault that his students are also your students since both subjects are certainly connected. They think it would help them progress to another year of studying.

You can almost hear Miguel's voice in your head, scoffing at you in his usual treatment. "Well, tell him as the professor of genomics, he should know that without understanding the concept of our DNA molecule, the area of his interest would just crumble into a hypothetical theory. To do a genomic mapping without learning about the DNA structure would just be a fantasy thought in the science department if people wouldn't bother to take my subject. Pass the message to O'Hara, would you?" 

When it comes to presentation research proposals, Miguel is always five steps ahead. He explains his scientific research clearly and thoroughly. But you always find a weak niche of his to point out and debate it. And in Miguel’s case, he shows no mercy towards you about your research proposals. Finding every little fault to the tiniest detail. “That wouldn’t work because the genetic code doesn’t match with what you wanted and it won’t get you the protein you want for your DNA,” Miguel argued. “You’ll have a shit genomic library for your research so come up with a better proposal.” 

You and Miguel would bicker at any point in time. But what’s more applauding is that everyone in the institute thinks that you and Miguel are suited for each other. Even daresay, the two of you would fall in love, already acting like an old married couple. Ha, as if! 

No matter how many times the two of you happen to be in the same room together, making a cup of coffee or tea at the same time, you can’t see yourself falling for someone like Miguel without frowning. No matter how many times you catch his gaze and he catches yours, the tension from the glaring across the room heightens, you don’t see how people can fathom the thought that you and Miguel are meant to be together. 

And no matter how many times you and Miguel bicker in the shared lab room, bodies leaning close intimidated in frustration as the two of you pick on each other’s thoughts, you convince yourself that in no way the two of you would start kissing from the heated passion. Even if that thought lingers in your mind at every argument with Miguel. 

former molecular biology and genomics major here 😭 i graduated uni like three years ago and did both subjects. it was a blast and i did lose hairs from the intense learning. i'm working on professor rivals with miguel fic because i cannot get this out of my head. professor miguel does things to me and i want you to experience this with me too.

TAGLIST GROUP:

@99matterss @tojishugetiddies @miauamy @pigeonmama @oyayablog @therealloopylupin2099

[harmonyindark245]

Character Hate

This is 100% a rant and you don’t have to agree with me, but I really needed to talk about it. I’ve been trying to distance myself from the ACOTAR fandom because of all the toxicity, but I always find myself drawn back, especially with the new books coming out and everything. There is a big difference between hating and disliking. And I understand disliking certain characters because they don’t sit right with you. But one thing that I cannot fathom, is the hatred. Why has everyone decided to hate on characters that aren’t our favorite? I just wanted to point out a few specific characters. 

Rhys 

He’s secretly evil. Really? Did you all not read the first three books? I get the argument that we only see him from Feyre’s pov, but even Feyre disliked him until we found out his truth. Also, can we talk about the absurdity of this claim? The man who was SA’d for FIFTY YEARS, who hasn’t even shared his trauma with his MATE because he doesn’t want to burden her with it. The man gave it all up for his friends, family, and PEOPLE. As an Elriel shipper, I was pissed at Rhys for interrupting them, but I GET IT. He wasn’t sure if he was going to survive, if his mate was going to live. Then there was all the other drama that was happening. Of course, he wouldn’t want one of his close friends going out and dueling with the son of a high lord (and technically heir of a whole court). And at the start of ACOSF, Rhys has every reason to hate Nesta, and I don’t think that needs to be justified. And in HOFAS, as a High Lord, he again had every right to be pissed. I just feel like sometimes you guys forget that as well as being a part of their family, he’s also the High Lord of the Night Court.

Nesta

Yes, I will admit that she’s not a good person. But she worked through it. She went through traumatic experiences, that if anyone of us goes through, we would probably behave the same way as she did. But she worked on herself. She healed. She became a Valkyrie. Nobody could hate Nesta more than she hates herself. And I admit that I could never completely love Nesta because as someone who has been in a position that Nesta had been, I can’t even imagine letting my younger sister go through all of that to keep us alive. It’s a completely personal reason, because I would do anything for my sister, and the way Nesta didn’t do anything when they most needed it will always anger me. But I still admire her for how she tried to bring herself back. Because it’s not easy. Feyre was also the same when she was depressed and she also worked on herself. Even though I don’t like Nesta, she does not deserve the hate she gets. 

Feyre (?!)

If you hate Feyre, you probably should’ve stopped reading around the second book.

Elain

What is it with people hating on Elain? I never understood how you can hate someone who has done NOTHING to ANYONE. The only possible reason people could hate Elain is because she happened to like a boy. It’s not as if she didn’t want to help out with the court. She even apologized to Feyre. She even took part in the war. So what is the problem with her? Just because she doesn’t like Lucien and likes Azriel she deserves to be hated upon? She’s boring? She can’t give birth to Azriel’s kids? Is that really what we’re getting to? Again, I can understand disliking her because she wasn’t helpful during the cabin, or maybe because she was rude to Nesta or whatever, but hating her for such feeble reasons? Let’s not forget that it was Elain who convinced Nesta to let Feyre and the three unknown Fae males inside their house and offer it up as a meeting place.

Gwyn

Just because a group of people want to ship Gwyn with Azriel doesn’t mean that other people have the right to hate her. She has done NOTHING wrong. She hasn’t even shown interest in the man. She has her things she’s going through and she is also trying to heal. There has been not a single action done by her yet that deserves the hatred she gets. As an Elriel shipper, I will admit some people unnecessarily try to bring Gwyn down. 

Fans

We are all the same. We read this amazing series by SJM and love the characters and dynamics and want to talk about it share our thoughts and theories and write pieces of fiction for others to enjoy. It’s vile how many hate comments are passed around in this community. You enjoy what you love, and let others enjoy what they love. You don’t need to prove your likes by bringing other people and characters down. You may not realize it, but some of us relate to our favorite characters, and when you say hurtful things against the character, it truly feels like a personal attack. The main reason why I couldn’t stay in the fandom anymore was because of the claims that Elain didn’t deserve to be with Azriel because she couldn’t have his kids. As someone suffering from PCOS and might not be able to have kids, that statement always breaks my heart. Do people think that just because a woman can’t have kids she doesn’t deserve love? There are so many examples of such small claims causing hurt to the fans, which is not what fandoms are for. 

And with that, if you have something negative to say about my rant, then please keep it to yourself. 

[welcome-to-green-hills]

So what do you think happened in between the time that Shadow was ejected from the ark and to earth after the ark raid fifty years ago? I really hope that is explored a bit more in the third film. On top of that, I think that you should treat yourself and go all sciencey with this post well. Mainly because I want to know your thoughts on the matter and I love reading your science posts and whatnot

Hello, my dear!❤️✨

I completely agree. I do hope that this is explored a bit more in the film. It wasn't entirely clear as to what happened within that time-frame in the games. I'm sure that many of us have an idea as to what happened with Shadow as he crashed to Earth from the ARK in Sonic Adventure 2. From my perspective, it seemed like Shadow had a bit of time on Earth before GUN Soldiers came to retrieve him from the escape pod.

Onto to your last bit, are you asking me what would happen to Shadow as he crashed to Earth? Like... in a real world perspective? Something realistic? Uh, I can try and go all science-y like you've asked. Please keep in mind that my background in science is anthropological rather than astronomy and such.

The first thing that I should address is that most of my comparisons are in a modern-day setting. Yes, we can see that everything in the Sonic universe is technologically advanced, but we can't begin to fathom HOW advance they really are. We're only going on the notion that they're incredibly advanced. My logic and retelling of the situation is hypothetical. It should not be taken as a hard fact.

Let’s establish Shadow’s setting before diving into the intensity of the situation. Applying logic of modern day technology to the situation, we know that a shuttle from the earth to the moon is roughly three days (Dobrijevic, 2023). This is made with the assumption of using 21st century aerospace engineering/dynamics. We, as the audience, see that science and technology in Sonic's universe is highly advanced. The problem with this is that we don't necessarily have a strong understanding of how advanced it truly is. We can assume that it's drastically different from ours, but can't place a marker in time how how many years into the future it truly is. The best that we can say is that it's highly advanced. For the sake of my sanity and yours, we'll say that the escape pod's projection from the ARK to earth is in three days or less. (This is based upon the assumption that the escape pod cannot be piloted on Shadow's end).

What we need to realize is that Shadow is in a state of shock. Everything that happened on the ARK is still fresh in mind. That moment replays over and over again. When someone is in a state of shock, your entire body in sensory overload. Blood flow drops and resorts in a plethora of symptoms. Symptoms like irregular and labored breathing, cold and clammy skin, enlarged pupils, changes in mental behavior, and so forth (Mayo Clinic, 2023). These symptoms can vary depending on the intensity of the situation. And if anything, the ability to think rationally dwindles. The popular thought that the fandom has was why Shadow couldn’t teleport back to the ARK when ejected into space. While this may have seen like a logical idea, even if he bypasses his mental state of shock, there is a problem with canon rule. Before the rule change, Shadow could only use chaos control to teleport unless he possessed an emerald (Takashi lizuka, 2013). Chaos Control is different than a Chaos Snap, meaning that distance is a factor. This was the canon rule for when SA2 was released in 2001. Even if he were to rationally think and formulate a plan, he wouldn't get very far. He’s completely trapped in the escape pod.

Other than going through a state of shock, he learns how to quickly adapt to the void of space. These are physical changes. A few queries that are stressed from astronauts is how they must relearn to adjustment to earth's gravity, natural lighting, and sound after space travel. These assumptions could be implied with Shadow as well.

In space, Shadow learns to adjust to the light intake that's around him. There isn’t a lot of light, but there's enough for him to see stars, planets, and the ARK. Since the ARK functions as a space station, we can conclude that he exposed to select adaptations of light cycles is present (Guo et. al, 2014). This means that he's adapted a circadian (biological) clock and sleep cycles. His natural habitat is space; his circadian clock matches space time. Entering into a new habitat with a different volume of light intake may mess with him completely. Other than affecting his sleep cycle, it will affect how he's able to see in a brighter setting. This could potentially result in temporary blindness. So even landing on earth, he wouldn't be able to get very far due to lack of vision problems.

Another factor to mention is his adaptation to earth's gravity. We must assume that the ARK has his own gravitation field and one similar to earth. I stress the word "similar" because it's not a complete replica. It's artificial. We cannot make the assumption that the escape pod possesses a gravitational field like the ARK—we lack that detail in SA2. Therefore, we must conclude that Shadow is subjected to weightlessness. We've learned from physiological study that extended periods of time in space will result a change in how the body adapts to earth's atmosphere (Cranford & Turner, 2021). Since Shadow is isolated in an enclosed environment for a specific amount of time, his perception of spacial orientation, head-eye/hand-eye coordination, general locomotion, and balance might be minimal. There would still be difficulties of adjusting to earth, but he wouldn't spend countless years of his lift trying to adapt.

Finally, there's the adjustment to sound. The unit of sound is measured in a decibel. The decibel value can increase and decrease depending on the environment. Typically, we hear a sound frequency at a decibel of 70 in every day activity (Editor, 2018). This is the equivalent of hearing car horns or a crowd of people talking in a store. Compared to everyday life on the ARK, Shadow is thrown into the void of space. The lack of sound—other than his own breathing (which can be measured at a decibel of 10 in sound frequency)—will be what he’s used to hearing. Once welcomed to earth, the frequency of sound that he’s used to is quickly forgotten. The natural and human sounds that come from earth may be too loud for him to comprehend at first. This could result in ringing of the ears and muffled noises. Since he was not trapped in space for a prolonged period of time in the escape pod, he will adjust eventually.

If Shadow was able to land on earth safely before GUN Soldiers came to retrieve him, then realistically he'd spend some time recovering from his escape. He wouldn't be moving around a lot. Then again, I'm not entirely sure of his recovery rate in order to say this with confidence. It would only be a matter of time before he was found and imprisoned with his creator by the United Federation. As I've said before, this is all hypothetical.

Jesus Christ this turned really dark... I hope this answers your question.

[shock]

the topic of school gun violence is such a deep systemic issue and i can't lie and say there aren't some days I go to work at my school where I'm afraid something will happen. I have had to message my family to tell them I love them. I have sat in a locked room with children and planned for how ill get in the way if someone comes for them. The person you become when your kids in your school are threatened is a person you can't forget being, because you never forget how it feels to be ready to die any second to protect your kids.

Kids are really hurting right now. I work with middle schoolers. The last normal school year my 7th graders had was 4th grade. You transition into puberty and middle school from a screen, fearing for you life and watching your family die or get sick or lose jobs and housing and everything that makes life worth living...

you don't learn physical boundaries when you aren't on the playground learning real time how to treat people. You have an entire generation of kids that doesn't know the difference between playing and physical aggression. On a near daily basis I am teaching teenagers that they can kill their friends with the headlock they're putting them in, I'm seeing kids not know when to stop, there is no stopping, play fighting becomes real fighting because there is no other out except to finish it when you have no ability to self-regulate.

We had a circle of kids today talking about what the phrase "go touch some grass" meant to them. It's not a meme to kids this age. One of the kids said, "I didn't do anything. I was afraid to go outside. I thought I would get sick and die. I still get scared." Theu didn't see their closest friends for over 2 years. Social workers, counselors, teachers, childhood friends, no one was able to reach them for years. They didn't have cameras on, zoom is a trigger for kids, it's nothing like an online uni class, it's a graveyard.

You leave everything behind in 4th grade and spend the next three years of your life changing dramatically and seeing that change in everyone else from a screen. You can block anyone, you can ignore everything, you become numb to consequences that lead to better behavior and compassion we take for granted. Conflict resolution looks like blocking and never having to address it. These kids cannot fathom resolving a conflict with words. They can't even describe what emotions they're feeling, but they can feel the soul-deep frustration at not having that ability. They are trapped and powerless in a body that is bigger and stronger than it was in 4th grade with none of the tools to regulate anything. More than ever I see kids acting on impulse on a way that is beyond normal. I am seeing dissociative patterns in almost every student I meet. Most of them have taken all year to even understand why certain things make them do certain things.

This year alone I've been punched in the head, face, eyes, you name it by kids who can't see what's in front of them acting on blind rage that should never have to exist in an entire group of people, ive been recorded by kids i knew and talked to every day breaking up a fight like they didn't know who I was and it was a spectacle to watch because they can turn their brains off as a traumatic response to repeated exposure and to them this is how life is, I've been thrown to the ground & nearly hit by a car breaking up kids who took it into the street with intent to kill, had kids bleeding in my office from head wounds they got from accidentally hitting someone with a ball, ive put kids in ambulances, we've been on lockdown, we've had high schoolers break in and attack 12 year olds because they dont know how to solve conflicts without the highest extreme either, kids are hurting. They need so much help right now. Being a kid right now is a traumatic event. Not a single kid I work with is living in a non-traumatic event. It is happening all the time.

The pandemic has destroyed so much for everyone but to our kids the pandemic is their only measure of reality. The post-present-pandemic has created a generation of trauma and loss of education. Be here for our kids more than anything, our future is with them and they need so, so, so much love right now, and it's love they think they don't deserve, it's love that they're resistant to getting, they have no trust for any system or person or each other because every single thing has failed them. Their reality is trauma they are more powerless than anyone to change. They can see everything and only react. Being a kid is a traumatic event, please love these kids. They think that this world doesn't love them and they are so, so far away right now, but they're still able to come back. I'm seeing it real-time. These kids need to be reached before they can't come back, make the safety and love for kids a priority. Hope is being lost on them and their reality is a nightmare.

They won't be kind to you. They won't trust you. They won't let you in and they are in survival mode. And they still need you. They need to know where the bar should be for how they're treated and they need to know what they're worth now more than ever. They're worth the world and more.

[merv606]

What about a Puritianverse...but it's with older virgin Daniel. He's never been in any sort of relationship, and has remained "pure" in the full sense of the word. Sure, he's not super unaware of what happens between an Alpha and an Omega, but he doesn't really know the details. He doesn't think any Alpha would be interested in him anymore, and is resigned to his fate. Maybe Terry here is the same age, or younger--either way, he knows Daniel is his the moment he sees him, and sets out to make him his, much to Daniel's dismay and confusion.

"But," Daniel begins completely confused, and still reeling from the fact that this handsome Alpha wants to wed him, "Mr. Silver...I'm not anywhere near the proper age of marriage anymore. I don't understand why you'd want me when you can have someone else, someone who is younger and--"

Terry sighs in exasperation. He adores how clueless Daniel is certainly, but it's not working in his favor presently. And there's some anger there, too. Anger at his soon-to-be mate thinking so lowly of himself. How dare he think that he would be unwanted? Undesirable?

*Pets this ask*

I picture how Ralph was in KK3 for this so - 27/28 in real life.

And of course that’s how old TIG was too (minus the three months lol)

But a part of me imagines as well, that Ralph with TIG from CK or even him in Black Friday.

All versions are 🔥 so I’ll leave it up to whoever reads it to decide which Terry they’re reading it as.

The omega is so soft, so supple.

The baby fat to his checks, the way they flush that delightful shade of pink, that match the pink of his lips, that frame an inviting mouth that always seems to be slightly open.

And his hips, Terry knows if he were to grab them his fingers would sink into the soft flesh, knows those cute little tits would form the perfect little moulds in Terry’s hands - knows he would have no trouble providing for the babe Terry desperately wants to put inside him.

His thoughts are plagued by it.

The boy was built for sin - for worship and ruin by Terry’s hand.

How much softer he will become when that happens, how much more round and full he will be with life growing inside him - life put there by Terry.

Terry grows hard each night as he lies in bed thinking of it - fucking the little omega full of pup after pup.

His belly never flat because of Terry’s love; his tits always nice and full.

How it would look with a pup latched on, his belly round with another one inside.

An omega like that - already supple and soft - body clearly ready to be bred - is nothing but enticing to an alpha - a body like that is meant to be bred.

A body like that will be bred.

Because a body like that is asking for it.

And Terry is going to give it to him.

Not even a week into their reluctant courtship - only because Danielle cannot fathom why an alpha, especially one of Terry’s stature, would ever want him - Terry tells Daniel of his plan to mate and bred him - as soon as possible - preferably within the month.

Terry wants to get started as soon as possible - get as much of the fertile years he has left.

Hopefully it takes on their wedding night ….

If not though, they’ll have plenty of practise.

In fact he might not let the little omega leave their bedroom or bed until it takes.

Marathons of sex to get him used to being taken so much - in anticipation for his heat and first breeding session during it.

Because if his seed doesn’t take while Terry fucks him full waiting for a heat, it will when a heat hit him. The little omega has been on suppressants so long - that when it hits it’s going to be a doozy.

Terry can’t wait. He’s helped omegas through heat but, never with the intention to breed though, always taking the utmost precaution, and now it will be with the intention to breed, and with his own mate.

In the time it takes for the wedding to be arranged, he courts Daniel, as he would have, albeit it would have been a longer courtship, had Daniel been younger, but there is still enough time to show him off; make his intention known to everyone and anyone.

The papers speculate Daniel is already pregnant, much to Daniel’s horror and Terry’s delight.

He does get his hands on his omega before then, but saves ridding Daniel of his pesky virtue to their actual wedding night, as is tradition.

The rules are strict on any of his potential heirs being conceived outside of the confines of marriage. Although not like a few weeks would be noticeable really.

The omega will be checked the day of the ceremony, to ensure he is a suitable candidate to bare Terry’s pups but he could easily pay the doctor to look the other way, and say he was still pure.

Still, he will not disrespect his little mate like that.

Their wedding night turns out to be everything and more.

Daniel in his traditional omegan wedding night attire - a sheer slips that hides nothing with a deep v showing off those cute little tits of him, the hem so low he keeps tugging it down ina vain attempt to cover himself. He is aware that his special place is fully visible when he moves in certain ways. He gives up though as trying to cover there only exposes his chest.

Although his body is innocent to these matters - confirmed by the required exam - of which Terry was present for - his age means he’s not completely naive to how these relations between an alpha and their omega work.

Daniel knows he is to be filled with his alpha’s manhood, and that his alpha will spend himself inside him. That his seed will be what grows the pup inside him.

He knows omegas cause this sin anyway, their husbands to harden, so they can have their omega in this manner.

These are his husband’s rights and his duties to his husband upon their marital bed (and anywhere else I shall decide to have you, sweetheart.)

Being filled with his husband’s seed will both consummate their marriage and result, hopefully, in a pup, although he’s not at the best time in his cycle for this.

This information has given to Terry - as os hos right as his soon to be alpha - his mate’s cycle and when he last had his monthly courses.

Terry is glad for this though, secretly hoping it doesn’t happen until his heat, as he wishes to experience his mate in heat.

His new mate is nervous, though he need not be.

Terry can already feel himself hardening under his ceremonial red, silk robes, from just the sight of his the little beauty.

“You look lovely, sweetheart. Absolutely ravishing,” and ravished he shall be.

After this night, he will be completely ruined for anyone else.

Terry will make damn well sure of that.

Daniel blushes, and it extends down his chest, self consciously trying to cover himself.

“None of that now,” Terry remarks, as he gentles wraps a hand around his wrist, closing around it easily, moving it away so nothing, save the scant material blocks his view. “You are mine to look at and touch now after all.”

And look and touch he shall.

He stands, a finger tracing down between those small mounds, dipping inside material barley covering him, caressing him through the fabric til they harden and poke against it before smoothing back up and pushing the fabric down his shoulder so he is exposed fully.

He can smell how wet the little omega is just from these simple touches.

Tastes it moments later when he opens his legs, burying his face in that wet cunt.

The little omega screams, arching up as the alpha laps at him, trying to close his legs around the alpha’s head - this feeling completely new and overwhelming.

The alpha’s tongue flicking against his stiff bud, a fingers fucking in shallowly, careful of the precious maidenhead.

Daniel’s touched himself there - pleasured himself by rubbing his special spot, and he thought that felt sinfully good, but this is something else entirely.

He comes like that, practically soaking the alpha’s face, who keeps licking up everything his already wrung out body has to offer.

Then, fingers sinking into the soft flesh of his hips.

His cock sinking into the equally soft body; his body opening for the alpha.

His small tits moving with the force of their love making.

Later Terry will want to see how they look as he’s taken from behind on his hands and knees.

Can’t wait to see his gorgeous omega in the proper breeding position. The only reason he wasn’t taken like that first was because Terry wanted his omega to be facing him when he was taken for the first time; watch his face as he was filled with cock for the first time, fucked wide open as full. Watch his face when he was filled with his alpha’s seed; watch his face as Terry possibly put their first child inside him.

When later comes, it finds his omega equally how Terry wants him. His face in the mattress now, Terry rubbing at his rosebud, feeling his omegan pussy clench around him; his body practically squeezing the orgasm out of him - desperate for more of his seed.

“This is how an omega best serves god - under his alpha as is intended,” Terry tells him, as he comes again, growling into Daniel’s ear, leaning forward to do so, cock driving in even deeper, filling the virgin womb.

Pulled back, so Daniel is sitting in his lap, back to his broad chest, Terry’s hands covering his chest, another on his lower belly, swollen with seed, swears he can feel his cock as it moves inside his mate, sure and true, owing the little omega completely.

Rubbing his swollen belly, his chest, “and this is how you will serve your alpha and god best - until your body does as intended as is filled with my child.”

Daniel knows this will be sooner rather than later, his husband not even going soft inside him.

Any question about Terry finding him undesirable are put to rest.

He has never felt so wanted or loved.

Placing a smaller hand over the alpha’s hand still rubbing his lower belly, he turns his head seeking his husband’s mouth.

When the kiss breaks, Daniel smiles. “I shall always endeavour to do as god intended and as my alpha desires.”

Terry’s alpha swells with pride and his perfect little mate. He chose well.

[cypressnmarigolds]

NSFW Bo Sinclair HCs + angst

I can't believe it. I've finally managed to start carving out a little space in my mean mind where I can feel safe and comfortable thinking about Bo. This is of course thanks to help from @slutforguts @early20sfailingplenty and @visceravalentines. You three have done some amazing work helping me get comfortable with Bo, even if you don't realize it, so thank you!

Anyway Let's get to it!

Contains: Bo being a complex, complicated human being. Switch, soft needy Bo.

🚫 Minors, blank and no-age blogs are not welcome on my blog or to interact with my posts. You will be blocked. 🚫

•First things first. I think Bo is very... complex. He goes back and forth with himself a lot. On one hand, he doesn't want to be a monster. He wants to be be better than his father (I think Victor facilitated a lot of the abuse Bo faced, Trudy probably just went along or didn't care unless she was pissed a Bo) and he wants to prove his parents wrong

•On the other hand, his parents taught him, told him he was a monster, wouldn't want to disrespect the dear old folks any would he? He also enjoys feeling so powerful in instilling fear and causing suffering to his victims. Making them feel like he did.

• This means Bo is going to have very complicated feelings about you as his (potential) s/o at first. He's going to be angry at you for making him feel so soft and weak and vulnerable, but at the same time, he wants to be so, so good for you, good to you. He has to be. Show you and everyone he's not a monster.

•When Bo first meets you, something clicks for him. Something about you catches his interest, makes him feel... something. He feels some pulsing incessantly in his brain, telling him he can't let you go. He can't hurt you, he can't kill you or scare you away. He doesn't know why, he just can't. His mind is an enigma. *cue image of spilt milk*

• Now, I Cannot, CANNOT imagine Bo putting his potential s/o in the chair. One, because I can't stand the idea , personally it would destroy my mind, and I can't even fathom coming out of that and still wanting Bo. I can't. Two, like I said, Bo doesn't want to be a monster to you. He won't put you there. He doesn't want to put you through what his parents did to him.

•He might actually be somewhat skittish and more reserved around you in the beginning. He's angry he feels so soft, but he's trying to be good for you. He's still gonna be a charming flirt, he may express frustration that you don't understand at times, but he is going to try SO hard not to take his shit out on you. Any visitors that roll in during this time get the brunt of his inner turmoil Vincent's having to do serious overtime, and also hiding away. Lester too, will be less present in town.

•Things are gonna be rocky and tense for a bit.

• I don't think he's gonna want sex too soon either. He has... intense tastes when it comes to sex, and doesn't want to scare or hurt you. He may believe that his desires are fucked up. He might see BDSM as a form of torture (given that all his kink gear is stored in the torture room) and has no place in pleasure shared between two consenting adults. Oh Bo, you are so very wrong.

• Bo will probably spill his guts to you one night after heavy drinking. When his scars itch and he scratches till they bleed, and the memories are too much to bear on his own. He will pour out everything to you though gritted teeth and sobs. What happened to him and his brothers, his parents, all his complicated feelings about you and his desire to be a good man for you despite how much of a monster he feels he is because of everything. He needs to know you love him anyway, and you do.(otherwise you wouldn't be here)

• Once all is said and done, you guys can work on things more calmly. Things will be worked and talked through. They won't be perfect, but Bo will be overjoyed that he gets to have this with you. Once you guys get to work on building your sex life, this fun really kicks off. 😈

• Bo loves to be dominant (but he is a switch) He loves tying you up, gagging you, teasing you, overstimulating you, denying you, spanking you, using toys on you... There's so much he loves to do with you.

•Anything you're comfortable with, he'll do. And he will praise/degrade you for being so brave and needy for him. And he will refer to himself as Daddy if you're on board with it I don't make the rules.

If you want some samplings Bo's dirty talk...

"You're my brave, strong little darlin' ain't 'cha? Lettin' me tie you up like this and have my way with you? Look at 'cha, squirmin' for me already.

"You gonna come for Daddy, huh? Is my needy little slut ready to come for me? Thaaaat's it, there you go darlin', make a mess for me."

"Is it too much sugar? You can't take another spanking? You sure? Cause this mess you're makin' all over my lap says otherwise."

•Now, Bo is a switch. Sometimes he needs to hand over the reigns. Let someone else do the thinking but sometimes he feels he needs to be put in his place or punished. Times like those can tricky to maneuver. Check in with him often and make sure he's not pushing himself past his limits. If you're domming him and you feel like something isn't right, use your safeword. Make sure he knows you don't want to hurt him. That you don't want to actually punish him, make him suffer. Sometimes he thinks he deserves it. Keep an eye on him.

• Now when Bo just wants to be fucked dumb and out of his mind? Ohhhh fuck you're in for a treat. He won't allow you to bind his hands, but he loves it when you take his hands in yours and press them to either side of his head while you fuck him.

•He loves being overstimulated (despite what his cries and whines may suggest) Does NOT like being denied. Edging is great, but ruined orgasms and straight up denial are a no-go for him.

• For some reason I can't stop thinking about Bo being blindfolded and having as many toys as possible used on him. So... blindfolds. Good.

If you want more samplings of Bo's dirty talk...

"Oh FUCK! Please! Ri--right there darlin' Yes! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Ah! Please... N-no more. I-I can't-- Ah Fuck! Again please. please!"

"Shit, you feel so, so, sososo good inside me. Fuck! Harder!"

lots of moans he tries to hold in, but they only turns into whines.

•Bo also loves getting on his knees and between your thighs. Because he KNOWS how powerless you are with him kneeling between your legs, staring intensely up at you with those blue eyes. He may be on his knees, but he is fully in control. He loves watching you squirm under his gaze and falling apart.

OK. Holy shit. I'm exhausted. I had to get this all out while it was still in my mind. It's waaaaaay past my bedtime but I am so happy I got to do this. I hope you enjoyed!!

[iwocrack]

Hey I noticed said you bookmarked Songofhopeandhonor's works on ao3. Would you mind sharing please??

I AM SO SORRY I BARELY LOG ON HERE 😭

okay listen I just went through my bookmarks and found whatever zutara stories that are orphaned on there.

I CAN'T REMEMBER IF THEY ARE THEIRS so please forgive me. I am Old.

Hope you find some you enjoy!

House of the Rising Sun

Compelled by the driving need to exact vengeance upon the man who murdered her mother, Katara poses as a Fire Nation noble's illegitimate child and flings herself headlong into the decadent Fire Court. And although her resolve is great, Katara may not survive the web of lies and hatred that binds the royal family.

Walk of Shame

Katara's goals for the semester are relatively modest; playing an inebriated round of Never Have I Ever with her coworkers and subsequently getting drunk-married to her boss's nephew is not something she had the foresight to take into account.

Her newest goal: secure an annulment before her brother and father get wind of this disaster. On the bright side, she's that much closer to ticking 'virginity loss' off her bucket list. Modern AU. Zutara.

Agni's Fever

She decides that she loves him for both the fire lilies and the brimstone on his breath. Oneshot. Zutara.

Zuko’s hands snag around her wrists. His body is a long line of tension, and now that he’s reared up on his knees to match her stance, she notices that his chest is as bare as it is soaked. “You can’t even begin to understand what’s happening to me."

“I’m trying to understand,” Katara grits. “Isn’t that what you wanted from me from the very beginning?”

oracle bones

The foreign, pictorial characters that bracelet Zuko's left wrist have never been covered in any of his lessons. He cannot read them.

And then he turns thirteen, and his father burns his wrist along with his face.

Ship to Wreck

But Katara didn’t bend at any of them. She rocked back a step, then two, then three. Her foot lashed out, and Zuko jumped back from a kick that never came.

Katara dragged the toe of her furred boot across the deck, drawing an invisible demarcation. “Just stay on your side of the ferry, and I’ll stay on mine!"

The Shape of Things

Seven's a good number," is all that Sokka has to say about it. Because he's an asshole.

other stories in this series

Love's Child

His hands—his graceful hands with their sharp knuckles and tapered fingertips, and their calluses from Firebending and sword fighting—would cup over her abdomen sometimes. They would curve gently over the pregnancy-hardened skin of her stomach, trace up and over the prominent veins in her swollen breasts.

Like Razors On My Lips

She ensconces herself in an enemy shrine only to bump into the one enemy she is unprepared to face. Set early Book 3.

Katara curls her tongue between her teeth, ready to demand what he is doing here, but the question, the frantic, horrified question, freezes into tangible blocks inside of her mouth. Of course he is here, of course, because he's always, always had a bad habit of turning up exactly where she and the others are, even if he never catches them. Ba Sing Se, that Earth Kingdom nunnery, Roku's Temple—another holy place, but will she turn out as fortunate now as she did then?

build me a city

Love, for you, is larger than the usual romantic love. It’s like a religion. It’s terrifying. [Zutara Month 2014]

Fathom

something always brings me back to you. zutara. jetara.

[celestialnxva]

The Race Against Time

༄ A Bridgerton x Marvel Crossover

Chapter 4: Fateful Choices

Summary: The past and present twist and bend together into realities people cannot accept. It's time to choose between the mind or the heart.

Timeline: New York Sanctum, 2023 (post-Endgame); Grosvenor Square, 1814.

WC: 7k words.

series masterlist. | main masterlist.

‘Mx. (l/n),

I personally offer an invitation towards you and Lady Danbury for Afternoon Tea. As this season’s diamond, I would like to establish a proper relationship with you, for I myself determine your prospects this year.

I am sure you have properly met my nephew, Prince Friedrich. For this reason, I am pleased to say that after Afternoon Tea, he would like to call upon you. I am sure that Lady Danbury can most certainly agree that his timing could not be more perfect with our day spent together. Thus, I will not be taking any other answers in your letter other than ‘yes.’

Best Wishes,

Your Queen.’

You rubbed your forehead tiredly while you paced across the room with the letter in your hand from the Queen herself. Lady Danbury looked just as tired as you were, as she of all people knew what the Queen was planning to do. You were previously venting to her about how you were able to find one of the stones when the letter came, and now, your plans have turned upside down. This problem would have been solved if the Queen did not require you to come, but she can’t take any answer other than ‘no.’ You were afraid that this would happen, because if you got the attention of the Queen, then—

“— she will insist that I let Prince Friedrich court me, even if I do not wish for such. Are you sure that I cannot refuse his courtship?” You asked desperately while you looked at her with pleading eyes. All she could do was lean back and let out a sigh.

“You must remember, Mx. (l/n), that I have established for you a high status for this season. Do not be daft and destroy the reputation I so carefully built for the sake of your plots,” she said sternly. You loved Lady Danbury, but you couldn’t help but feel irritated at her reminders of how incredibly idiotic societal rules were during this time. You could be given a ruined reputation by refusing a suitor? The rules weren’t fair at all, and it made you wish that you could go home.

Focusing your anger on society was a good distraction, and it was best not to think about the way you felt last night when three pairs of eyes stared intensely at you while you swayed in the Prince’s arms last night. You thought yourself to be mad, but Benedict has not called on you nor sent a letter to you for five days now. You chalked it up to be his busyness, but something in the back of your mind was telling you otherwise. Your thoughts of Benedict ceased when you heard Lady Danbury’s voice again.

“Mx. (l/n), you must accept Prince Friederich’s wishes to court you. I expected you to be more independent than other debutantes this season, but I cannot fathom why you would ever reject a Prince’s desire to court you, my dear,” she said before her hand reached out to grab yours so you could stop pacing. You looked down and felt shame rise to your cheeks. “I know you’re afraid of love. I do not know why you wish to be alone, but surely you cannot actually believe that you can be truly happy without someone to love?”

Love was the last thing on your mind, so it angered you that she was trying to convince you that love was a good risk to take, especially during an important mission such as this one. The last time you did that with Stephen, where did that lead to? You felt nothing but heartbreak, loss, betrayal, and every other depressing emotion over the fact that a man could care less about your established friendship, let alone your love. Why should you start trusting love now?

Before you can retort with your own remark, you heard the sound of faint footsteps echo on the other side of the door. You and Lady Danbury both shared the same look of truce for now before you two prepared yourself for the next guest. To your surprise, it was your butler who walked in first. Your brows furrowed in confusion. You thought that you had gone through the entire town of suitors for the past few days, but it seems that another person wanted to see you. He cleared his throat and bowed slightly to acknowledge you. “A Mr. Bridgerton is here to see you Msr.,” he said firmly before he left. If your eyes did not deceive you, the one and only Benedict Bridgerton briskly walked into the room with a huge smile on his face. You did your best to hide your excitement in seeing him again after he was absent for so long.

“Mr. Bridgerton, how lovely to see you—“

Before you could finish your sentence, you were cut off by the sight of Benedict quickly shutting the doors. It alarmed Lady Danbury, as she thought she was about to witness something more scandalous than she would like to see right now. “Benedict Bridgerton! What on earth are you doing?” She cried out incredulously. He looked back at her with pure excitement in his eyes. “You’ll never guess what I found in the Royal Academy of Art!” he exclaimed before he gently held up a small sack bag.

Your heart dropped. You really hoped that’s what you think it is.

With heavy anticipation, you slowly opened the bag and in it was the unmistakable yellow glow of the mind stone. You were so entranced by the beauty of it that you almost forgot to ask Benedict how he got it. You blinked away your dazed state before you turned to him in surprise. “What..? Where did you…?”

He could tell that you were struggling to comprehend the fact that he collected a stone all on his own. Though, he didn’t mean to. In truth, he was trying to get his mind off of your inability to love him by visiting his Art School and talking to a student named Tessa. He honestly tried to get his mind off of you by taking interest in her, but nothing compared to you and your ability to make his heart soar with song. To tell the truth of how he really got it would open a conversation he was not ready for, so he decided to bend the truth just enough so you would not tell that he was lying.

“I had to pick up a canvas from my Art School so I could take it home and paint it. However, I seemed to have lost track of time, for it had been four days of celebration with my peers before I realized that you must be waiting.” He smiled and gestured to the bag in your hand. “I was about to leave and pack up my belongings when I saw something glow on one of my friend’s palettes. When I saw it, I immediately knew it was something we were looking for! So, I took it and now,” he paused and exhaled triumphantly at the stone. “There it is. You’re welcome, by the way.”

You stared at him dumbfounded. How did he end up finding this stone in the most random of places? Most importantly, why did you care so much about where he was for the past five days? You tried to rationalize it and assume that he was only there to party with friends and he didn’t have relationships with any of them. He surely wouldn’t have someone…would he?

Why were you so bothered about it? Maybe it was because you did not want to have scandal brought upon you both when the ton realizes that Benedict has a partner while he was ‘courting’ you. You hoped it was that, because you certainly did not like the other option it could be: you were jealous.

No. It cannot be that.

You forced yourself to smile, because why on earth would you think about concerning yourself with Benedict’s love life? It’s not like he actually likes you. He’s just doing a favor for you so you could finish your mission. Once you’re finished, you can leave and forget that your thoughts of him ever strayed to fantastical ones. The sooner you can find the stones, the sooner you can get rid of the dreams, dreams all having to do with Benedict and his touch against your body. You cannot think about that anymore. You forbid yourself to.

“Wonderful, Benedict! We have two stones now! I will bring this back to Stephen and the others. I’ll be with you both shortly,” you exclaimed too quickly and dismissed yourself. Technically, you did not have to be in another room to use the portal, since Benedict had already seen it happen before. At this point, you were just excusing yourself so you don’t have to see him any longer than you have already. Your mind was discombobulated and it was frustrating you to no end.

After you left, Benedict let out a heavy sigh and sat across from where Lady Danbury was. She eyed the young man carefully, trying to assess what could be wrong with him. Though, she didn’t have to analyze it too much, since she already has a clue as to what could be troubling him. And unfortunately, she cannot help him this time.

“You should tell them,” she said knowingly, raising a brow at the other. She knew he was hesitant about confessing, but you only had a short amount of time left before you had to leave. Wasn’t it worth it for him to tell you that he loves you? The young man, on the other hand, would beg to differ. “If you have something to say, Lady Danbury, I should say what is on your mind,” he said dejectedly.

His mind was elsewhere, probably sketching in his head of how beautiful you looked in the ballroom that night. These past few nights were spent pretending that the prince was him, dancing across the floor with the world forgotten in your minds. There were no time periods, no rules. It was just you and him, dancing the night away. He wanted that with you every night. He wanted you. He wanted—wished, he could have you.

“Child, you mustn't let your emotions drown you in despair,” she called out to him. His eyes looked up at her with sorrow and shame. She would never admit it, but it broke her heart to see him so hopeless. That was why she wouldn’t give up on this relationship. She would not let Benedict give up so soon. “They only have a short amount of time left here, Mr. Bridgerton. I suggest you say something to them before it’s too late.”

His heart raced at the thought of confessing his love to you, as well as what your face would look like when you ultimately reject him. Seeing your face like that seemed too high of a cost for him to confess. He thought this way when Lady Danbury spoke up again.

“Follow your heart, Benedict. You must not let your pride lose your true love match,” she said more softly this time. That was all the advice she could give, really. It was up to him to do the work, and from the look on his face, he knew that. She watched as he nodded in agreement with her statement before he buried his face in his hands.

“I need to tell them, Lady Danbury, but it is too difficult for me to do so when my own brother wishes to court them,” he said, though his tone suggested that he knew more than he was speaking of right now. She narrowed her eyes and reached over to poke his shin with her cane, which caused him to yelp. He looked up at her and was about to complain, but once he saw her concerned gaze, he softened his stance. He didn’t want to tell you this, but at least telling Lady Danbury was good practice. He shifted in his stance before he hesitantly spoke up.

“Anthony… he wants to marry them. He plans to. I wish this weren’t the case, but unfortunately, when he described to me mother’s ring, it–”

He was cut off by the clicking of your heels on the wooden floor, announcing your presence in the room. He whipped his head around to see you with a confused look on your face. You were the first one to speak after the stunned silence.

“What are you two talking about?” you asked curiously. Lady Danbury looked at Benedict’s hesitation and she finally realized what he was about to say. Knowing what she knows about both you and Benedict, this will certainly make things much more complicated than it was before. She watched helplessly as he finally confessed to you.

“Mx. (l/n),” he said before he swallowed nervously. Your eyes bore into his, compelling him to speak. “You must accept my brother’s courtship. He plans to marry you,” he started and before you could cut him off, he held up his hand. “You are to marry him,” he said in finality before he started to make his way out the door. He did not want to break the news to you. It was too much pain for him to bear. He wished he could’ve made it out the door, but you gripped onto his wrist tightly. He did not make eye contact with you as you snapped at him.

“At least tell me why you are acting so coldly! You haven’t spoken to me in five days, and now you are telling me to marry a man I do not love? What has gotten into–”

He cut you off angrily and glared at you. “Because mother’s proposal ring has the blue stone you are looking for!” he lashed back, stunning the room into silence.

When you processed his words fully, you let go of his wrist and stepped away from him slowly. Your eyes held so much conflict and unresolved pain that he wished he could take away from you. He wished he could comfort you and tell you that everything was going to be okay, but it wasn’t. Not for him, and not for you.

When the back of your knees bumped into the soft material of the chaise, you sat down with a heavy heart. When you looked up at Benedict, you realized that you weren’t unhappy because you didn’t want to marry.

You were unhappy because it wasn’t going to be with Benedict.

———

Your heart was weighed down by anxiety and fear during your ride to the Royal Palace. You could hear Stephen talking in your ear while your mind drifted off to a time where you were peaceful and happy. When you were alone, you were calm. You did not have to rely on anyone and you certainly did not have to take care of anyone. When you eliminated love altogether, you lived a happy life.

Unfortunately, fate is cruel. Not only were you finding yourself to be falling in love with a man you can never have, but you were to be wed to a man you did not love. Not to mention you had to work with a man who pretended that he didn’t break your heart and trust. The last thing you ever wanted in your life was to get married and be trapped in a loveless marriage, but that fear is coming true for you now, and all you could was wish that you had never gotten involved with the idiotic Avengers in the first place. You were once again risking your heart and your life for them. It seems you never learn from the past mistakes.

“(Y/n), we can find a way out of this. You can have Benedict sneak into his room and steal it! You just have to b–”

“Will you shut the fuck up, Stephen?!” you cried out irritatedly, startling Lady Danbury out of her wits. She knew you talked to yourself sometimes and gathered that you were talking to people from the future, but you certainly did not have to yell and bring her close to a heart attack. You looked at her with an apologetic expression before you pinched the bridge of your nose anxiously. “Please, just. Leave me alone in my thoughts for now, okay?” you reasoned more calmly this time.

He hated seeing you like this. He wished he could go over there and be there for you. In fact, he was already spending his free time researching ways he could travel back in time to see you. You could train him on etiquette and he is willing to follow courting standards. He is willing to do anything to get to you because it hurt him deeply to witness for his own eyes you slowly falling for a man out of your time and out of reach; a man that wasn’t him. To put icing on the cake, the thought of you marrying someone else other than him just became reality. He didn’t want to stay back home any longer. You meant more to him than you could ever know. Therefore, this was why he decided to cut off comms for tonight, so he can spend the night researching instead.

Lady Danbury reached over to hold your hand, a gesture she had gotten used to doing at this point. She could tell that you were anxious about this entire situation and living in this world. She could tell that you were misguided and you felt the need to be alone and away from everyone. Nothing hurt more than to see someone go through the same mistakes she went through when she was younger. But, it wasn’t her job to get Benedict and you to love each other. That will come in its own time and on your terms.

When you two arrived at the Palace, you stepped down carefully and looked up at the impressive view. It was what you had expected: majestic, cold, powerful. You felt even more intimidated with each step you took towards the entrance of the Palace. Knowing the fact that you would be in the Queen’s presence soon, you considered yourself lucky to find solace in Lady Danbury’s company and in the fact that the Queen liked you. The situation with Friedrich would have to be resolved later. For now, you did your best to enter this event with an open mind and open heart. After all, the Queen doesn’t take lightly to hysterics.

One of the guards escorted you down a rather large hall as you tried your best to keep your eyes emotionless and focused in front of you. You will not allow yourself to feel weak this afternoon. You had a mission to accomplish.

“Presenting Lady Danbury and Mx. (l/n), Your Majesty,” you heard before you gracefully entered the large room with a faint smile on your face. The both of you bowed politely before the Queen who was sitting in front of a large table. The Queen looked pleased with your appearance and gestured to the seats that were reserved for you. Lady Danbury led you both to where you both to your seats and shifted to make yourselves comfortable. The Queen wasted no time in interrogating you.

“Mx. (l/n)! You truly light up a room with your radiance and beauty. How ever do you do it?” she asked in awe (whether or not she was mocking you, you would never know). You tilted your head politely while you let the servants serve you tea. “I am honored by your compliments, Your Majesty. However, I can only accredit it to my ability to be content in any situation I am ever met with. Lady Danbury has certainly taught me quite well,” you said kindly. Your tone was incredibly fake, but you were a good actor. Your attitude even fooled the Queen, which was an accomplishment, really.

The three of you had a quaint time chatting the afternoon away. You had to admit to yourself that you enjoyed your time here so far. Of course, this sentiment immediately vanished when you heard an announcement of the name you dreaded the most to hear today. You stood up numbly and bowed before the Prince as he made his way towards you with a lopsided grin on his face. From the night you two danced, he wasn’t a conversationalist. Though, you didn’t mind as much because he had kind eyes. However, you didn’t want this man. He was too plain for your taste.

“Mx. (l/n), It is lovely to see you, as always. And your dress is quite beautiful! It sparkles like the radiance in your eyes,” he said smoothly. You forced yourself not to roll your eyes at the cheesy remark and forced yourself to act more shy in his presence. “You are too kind, my Prince,” you said daintily while looking up at him through your lashes. Your beauty truly struck him speechless, especially now. The way you looked at him made him feel so alive.

Before you could say anything more, the Queen cleared her throat. You stood up straight and turned to her with a kind smile. She looked at the both of you with approval before she turned to her nephew with a more forced smile. “Talk. to. them,” she said through gritted teeth. Friedrich’s eyes widened slightly but he concealed it with a charming smile. He offered his arm to you. “Shall we converse over there?” he asked politely, gesturing to the set of sofas on a more appropriate distance from the Queen and Lady Danbury. You forced another smile and took his arm. “I would be delighted to.”

You two had only conversed for about an hour or two before you heard multiple pairs of footsteps make their way to the room. You cut yourself off mid-sentence as you turned around to see who could be making all that noise.

As if your day couldn’t get any worse, the Bridgerton family had shown up just in time to see you conversing with another suitor you did not want to have. The family did not notice you while they greeted the Queen. You tried to keep it that way by turning back to continue your conversation with the prince. Unfortunately, he smiled at you apologetically.

“We should… greet the other guests,” he said in a way that made you feel almost guilty for the impolite thoughts you were thinking about while he was talking to you. You decided to make it up to him by linking your arm with his so you could greet the Bridgerton family. When you two finally approached the group, you could feel a sudden sense of tension fill the room. You tried not to look at the Bridgertons and focus on what the Queen had to say.

“I must apologize in advance, my dear, but I have invited the Bridgerton family to chat with me as well. They are dear friends of mine, so you will be in good company.” she smiled at Violet before she turned to you. “I know you have met the second eldest Bridgerton, but feel free to introduce yourself to the rest of the family,” she said casually before she went back to her seat. You tried not to open your mouth in shock and instead turned to the matriarch of the family. You took turns greeting the family members, purposefully avoiding introducing yourself to the three brothers until the very last minute. You have learned from Violet that she had only brought who you now know to be Eloise, Francesca, Colin, Anthony, and Benedict, and that there were other kids at home and one already married off to a fucking Duke.

When it was finally time to greet the brothers, you tried to take your time introducing yourself to the third brother. Unfortunately, he–Colin– was a lot smarter than he looked and took it upon himself to introduce you to his other two brothers. You tried to keep your smile proper as you bowed politely to Benedict. He could not meet your gaze and you could not meet his. This was most definitely noticed by Lady Danbury and Violet, but you didn’t care. Not when Anthony was there.

When you finally went up to Anthony, you bowed for him. You were ready to leave and sit on the couch for another round of eating biscuits when his hand reached down to hold onto yours. Your eyes watched as he slowly raised it up so he could kiss it sweetly. You were lucky your hands were gloved, or else he would feel your hands sweat in nervousness. “It is always a pleasure to see you, Mx. (l/n),” he said formally. You were too shocked at his boldness in front of the Queen and Prince, yet you were unable to look away from him. So when he looked up at you through his lashes, you gazed into his eyes and felt the world pause in motion. Something about him made him so mesmerizing. You did not know what it was but it made you feel uneasy.

The tension only thickened as everyone watched the two of you stare at each other. In the eyes of the other people, it looked like you two were gazing longingly at each other. But for the people who knew your heart, they knew it was not intentional or genuine. Even when he finally dropped your hand and stood up, your eyes stayed fixated on each other. You were more so trying to figure out Anthony’s motives while he looked at you with purpose. He needed you to choose him, and now that he knew the prince was there, he had to do everything he could to convince you to choose him without any gifts to give you. If he didn’t have a gift to give you this afternoon, then he will charm you with all the passion he could muster without feelings of true love.

Finally, the Prince awkwardly cleared his throat and your body quickly turned to him with a kind smile. “Why don’t we all sit down? I am sure that you must be tired from your trip to the Palace,” he offered. Everyone was too quick to agree and practically rushed to the table. You really wished you hadn’t sat next to the Prince because now, you were directly sitting across from Benedict and Anthony. Anthony was glaring at the Prince, and you were staring at Benedict. That stare was one of longing, even if you didn’t realize it yet. His eyes started to clear from the fogginess of sorrow and blossom into a look of hope. When he saw your expression, he thought that maybe you were finally seeing him for who he is.

Maybe he had a chance.

“Mx. (l/n),” the Queen called to you and you blinked away your thoughts to look back at her. “Yes, Your Majesty?” She looked over at her nephew and gestured to the servants behind her to bring to her nephew his gift. You gulped at the size of the box, unsure of what he was going to give you.

“Mx. (l/n), I would like to give you this necklace as a gift. I hope you can accept my gift chosen with the purest of intentions,” he declared to you before the box opened to reveal a beautiful necklace. You were quickly realizing now that the Queen did not invite the Bridgertons to catch up with them. She wanted them to see that you chose her nephew over Anthony (or god forbid, Benedict).

Your eyes warily stared at the necklace, feeling like you could be blinded by the light it produced from its reflection from the sun. You almost started to squint your eyes before your eye caught a flash of purple light. Your eyes snapped open in curiosity from where that light was coming from. If your suspicions were true, for the first time today you will have a sense of hope. And when you finally looked down to properly examine the necklace, you saw the purple power stone delicately placed as the biggest gem. Before you could help yourself, you snuck a glance at Benedict, trying to tell him about it. When he met your eyes, he looked down at the necklace and felt like his heart could tear in two. You were now one step closer to leaving him forever. He tried to ignore the feeling as he nodded slightly back at you, reassuring you that you could accept it.

You thanked the prince gratefully, but your eyes were hazy and your tone was not as disguised as it should have been. It was slightly hesitant; everyone but the Prince could hear it. Their suspicions were only confirmed by your expression when the Prince put the necklace on your neck. You were situated in a way where you could stare at both Anthony and Benedict. You looked at Benedict and saw his eyes practically wither in an emotion you could not quite place yet. You looked at Anthony and felt like a deer caught in headlights.

The way he stared at you was so intense that you could practically catch on fire by staring at him. As you felt the Prince’s hands slither up your collarbone to put the necklace on, you watched Anthony in fear. You were practically frozen, for you were afraid of what he could do to the prince. He looked so jealous and so furious that it was dangerously close to breaking his polite impression in the Queen’s presence. Benedict could only watch you helplessly as he clearly saw how scared you were being with his brother and how you didn’t even want to be in this position at all. He wished he could whisk you away from all this madness, but he had to stay silent. He had to, because your life depended on it.

When the prince finally pulled his hands away from your body, he looked at you with adoration. He loved how you looked with his gift on your neck, and from the way he was staring at you, you could tell that he was considering to even propose to you on the spot.

However, you were startled when the Queen called your name. When you looked up at her alarmed, she was quite taken aback by your expression. Despite her better judgment, she stood up and held out her hand. “Come with me, child,” she said sternly, though her voice was softer when it came to speaking to you. The other people in the room looked at each other and the Queen in confusion, unsure of what to make of what had clearly transpired just now. When she saw that no one was talking, she took your hand and scoffed at the others. “Socialize without us! I shall promenade with the Mx., as it seems to me that they look like they need air,” she said firmly before she quickly dragged you away from the room.

When you both had finally stopped, you were staring at what seemed to be a garden. It was beautiful and the flowers seemed to be in full bloom. You closed your eyes and soothed your nerves to the merry tunes the birds seemed to sing for you today. The Queen let you calm down and took the time to watch you closely.

She knows the eyes you had. Your eyes were eyes that have seen so much, always lost and wandering everywhere without a sense of stability in your life. She knows those eyes because she had those eyes since the moment she arrived at this Palace all those years ago. She knew what it was like to not know your place in this world, especially a world that you are foreign to. To feel friendless and lonely was the worst feeling that she had ever felt. How ironic it was that you and her both sought solace in Lady Danbury’s presence.

Your eyes were the reason why she invited you in the first place. She crowned you as a diamond, not because of your stunning beauty, but because you were frightened and you were alone. She wanted you to experience the best love that this ton could offer because she wanted you to experience what she luckily had with George. She wanted that future for you.

So it felt so wrong for her to push her nephew closer to you when you clearly held feelings for another person in that room.

After staying silent for a few more minutes, she finally spoke up.

“Beautiful, is it not?” she started, not bothering to turn to you for an answer. You opened your eyes and nodded slowly. “Yes, Your Majesty,” you replied timidly. Her heart felt for you and your insecurity in this society. She hoped that after this conversation, she could bring you the solace you clearly needed. She gently took your hand into her own and led you back into the confines of the Palace. You watched as she navigated through the maze of hallways until she turned the final corner into a room she had been looking for.

You walked inside with awe, reveling in the sight of all the beauty set of crowns and jewels, each sparkling in their own way. She watched you fondly and let you roam around while she spoke. “I may be your Queen, but I know that everyone deserves to find true love.” You turned to her and listened intently. She hesitated before she confessed. “I saw the way you looked at that Bridgerton,” Mx. (l/n).” Your eyes closed tight, thinking that she was talking about Benedict. You were waiting for her to berate you before she said something that truly turned your world off its axis.

“I know Lord Bridgerton. He had a certain reputation in the past, but he is a good man. I have seen how honorable he was in the last season with his sister’s debut.” She walked over to you with a faint smile on her face. “He will be good to you.”

Your brows knit together in pain. Fate continued to push you towards Anthony again and it was only a matter of time before you conceded. You smiled faintly and reached up to rest your hand on the gifted necklace. Your face showed regret and before you could apologize, she shook her head and took your hands into hers. “No, you must forgive me. Though my nephew adores you, I was wrong to introduce you into an environment you were not prepared for,” she said. You were shocked at her willingness to admit defeat, as she was notorious for the opposite. She continued. “Let us leave this event in the past. Though, I want you to promise me that whomever you choose—whether it be Lord Bridgerton or someone else, you will choose to follow with your heart and not with your mind.”

Her eyes swirled with an unlabeled emotion that had finally made you truly look at her. You could tell that she had many stories to tell and a life that must be similar to yours, especially if she was showing this much empathy to you.

When she looked down at your necklace again, she thought to herself for a moment. If this was the last time you could talk to her, then she should give you a parting gift. She guided you towards a set of crown and jewels and touched it daintily. You haven’t looked at it because you were so focused on reading the Queen’s eyes, hoping to understand the motive behind her actions. When she turned to you, she caressed your cheek. You flinched a bit at the sudden contact, but you leaned into it nonetheless.

“This set was what I wore during the coronation. The king oversaw the making of it because he–” she paused for a moment after sudden emotions overwhelmed her at the mention of her husband. You held onto her hand reassuringly. When she finally calmed down, she looked at the jewels again.

“This was my favorite set because he knew that I loved emeralds. He knew because he truly loved me,” she said with a nostalgic expression on her face. You felt for her and with her words, you finally understood why she was being so kind to you. With a content sigh, she lifted the emerald necklace up to show to you. You stepped back in fear of breaking it, but when she held it in front of you, you took the time to admire the simplicity of the necklace. It wasn’t ornate like the one that you wore on your neck. It was simple and pure, just like George’s love for Charlotte. You looked up at her as she pushed them towards you. You immediately choked up and pushed it back. “No, no, I-I can’t–”

“Take it,” she said firmly. You looked down at the necklace again and furrowed your brows. You tried to figure out why the gems looked so similar to you until a certain angle she held the necklace caused the biggest gem to light up in your eyes.

Was that…?

She smiled knowingly at your expression and carefully rested it on the palms of your hands. “Consider it my gift to you, my dear. When you look at it, may you always remember the moment we shared together and your promise to me,” she whispered. You didn’t deserve her and how kind she has been to you. The fact that you lucked out and got the time stone was a miracle.

Before you knew it, you were sniffling in front of the Queen and when you thought she might tease you, she simply gathered you into her arms and gave you a tight, firm embrace. It was an embrace that spoke volumes. It was an embrace that reassured you that you were not alone, and an embrace that taught you that it was okay to open yourself up to love.

When you pulled away from her, she cupped your cheek with her gloved hand and tenderly wiped away the tears you have shed. She felt a motherly duty to you, like somehow, you were someone that meant more to her in another universe than you did in this one.

“Tell Lady Danbury not to take you to the next ball. You will certainly need to rest before heading to the countryside.”

You furrowed your brows in confusion and asked her a question while she led you back to the room. “What ever do you mean, Your Majesty?”

She turned to you with a teasing smile. “Why, Lord Bridgerton will ask you to come to Aubrey Hall for their family’s ball. I’m sure he’ll be more than willing to do so if you told him the truth.”

You closed your eyes nervously as your hand shook in hers. Before she opened the door, she turned to you. “You have my blessing, child. Tell him how you feel. I will go ahead and tell my nephew to leave the room before I have a guard escort you inside.” And with that, she went inside and left you all alone.

You were scared, but with almost all the stones in your possession, this was the only way to get one of the last ones. If you followed Stephen’s advice and had Benedict steal it, Anthony will only assume that Benedict wants you and will see to it that you both be wed. After your realizations today of how much you really fell for the man, marriage to him was the last option. At least with Anthony, he had been nothing but kind and respectful. He may be marrying for duty, but at least he would be willing to wait to propose and fully court you, just like he said with you.

At the same time, how long could you keep your charade up before you lose control and run to Benedict’s arms? It was not helping that Stephen could be spying on your every move anytime he wanted to, so you felt even less inclined to go through with associating with the Bridgertons at all. You were fully aware of the mess you were in and you needed to choose wisely, or else you will be compromised and the mission will be doomed. This situation only proved that love was terrible and made you go through terrible things. You only wished that you never fell in love with him. You wished that you and Stephen worked out. You wished life wasn’t so complicated and choices were not life or death. You had to make a decision fast before they escorted you. You needed to choose with your heart and not with your mind, just like the Queen said.

When they called you to come inside, you locked in on your decision and walked in with a more calm demeanor. Inside the room was a distressed family who was nervous about your condition and most importantly, your thoughts on what just happened this afternoon. It was nearing late into the evening, so this decision would determine whether or not anyone can stomach food tonight.

You took a deep breath and walked up to his family, the Queen’s necklace in your hand. Benedict saw the familiar glow that radiated off of the center gem and when he did, he already knew what you were going to say; who you were going to choose. So, he looked away just as Anthony looked up at you.

He stood up and kissed the back of your hand once more. The Queen seemed to have a happier aura to her after your talk with her. Seeing you with who she perceived to be your true love made her heart warm, knowing that she had done the right thing.

“Mx. (l/n), I must ask for your forgiveness for my bold gesture this afternoon. I realize your anxiousness and how it had to do with the Prince’s reaction to such. Rest assured that I have spoken with him and the Queen about my passionate intentions to court you.” He stood up and delicately held onto your gloved hand and gave you a faint smile. You tried to smile back.

“I wish to ask you if you could accompany me and my family in our ancestral home, Aubrey Hall,” he started before he stared into your eyes with the same passion that sucked you in. You felt uneasy once more. “I have intentions of marrying you, so if you’ll have me, I want to court you exclusively,” he declared, causing Lady Bridgerton to lightly gasp in surprise.

Everyone watched the scene as they waited for your answer. You opened your mouth slowly before his hand crept up to your wrist in a sensual manner. You couldn’t help but feel weak from his dominant aura. “I… wish to court you. You are perfect,” he whispered intimately and your breath hitched in your throat. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, now ready to declare what you think to be the right decision.

“Yes. I accept. You shall court me exclusively and I will happily spend time with your family in Aubrey Hall.”

Everyone cheered at the news while you and Benedict tried not to cry.

You had chosen with your mind.

———

tag list: @clockblobber @liathachcapricious @heliosphere8 @notyuralycat @mischiefmanaged71 @cleverzonkwombatsludge @olixerwxxd @ghost-lantern @fangirling-galore @marvelsmylife @asexualaromosafezone @wolf-phoenix-lover @v0idl1nq @abbygraceasd @splintered-emotions @luvmeijii @mando-is-the-way @miiikkeey

[mochalottie]

hiiii lottie, this is not a question and i honestly have no idea where this is going, but there's too much things i need to say soooo let's start with a massive, gigantic THANK YOU! the way you managed to write chapters averaging +10k words each EVERY SINGLE WEEK for TWENTY. NINE. FUCKING. WEEKS!!! this is monumental work you did on your free time and i'll never be grateful enough for all the efforts you put in it.

there is something about the way you write, idk if it's about your descriptions or the way you handle your characters and their voices, but i think i'm simply in love with your style! i had read all your avatar works before ftnadol, and i'm so glad i was able to read this one since the first chapter. the journey has been one of a kind, a wild ride unlike any other, and to tell you how deeply invested i became, just know i usually rarely take time to comment on fanfics. shame on me i know, but i'm too shy and never know what to say but idk what happened with this fic, i guess it broke something in me. it took me three chapters to leave the tiniest comment and then i was writing whole-ass essays???? i don't even know myself how that happened but goood, i think i needed to somehow process all the thoughts and feelings and emotions your writing gave me. and now it's so much easier to leave comments on other fics and it provides me so much joy and pleasure to know that writers know how much i enjoy and care for their works, so i guess i must thank you for that as well 💖

i think i told you already but your little story became a whole part of my routine, i had my monday night ritual reading the new chapter, screaming in my pillow and then again in your comments. i was looking forward to come back to this universe every week, thinking about those characters at random times throughout the week, wondering what would happen to them next and coming up with my own little theories. they were not always correct (malachy socorro, you will alway be remembered </3) but this kept reminding me the power held by fanfiction, stories, and art as a whole. i cannot fathom how some people manage to live their lives without being deeply involved in fandoms and engaging with cultural medias, and i'm so sorry they'll never get to experience the sorrows and joys it provides!

now that's been said, back to ftnadol! where to even begin? the whole concept of this alternative universe is a banger sort of idea! i mean, sorry, but eywa-blessed spider in a world where every single human was sent back to earth?!?!?! goooosh it feels just like yesterday that jake was finding baby spider in hell's gate, and look where we are now! so much has happened, those characters went to hell and back, and most essentially they've grown so so much!! baby spider and baby neteyam growing up as brothers since day one was not something i thought i needed, but you've crafted such a wonderful relationship, you wrote such a beautiful take on brotherhood and love and acceptance. i shed so many tears on this fic and just to think of their bond is making me emotional again.

every character was written so amazingly well: jake with all his humanity and stubborness, neytiri so fierce and caring, mo'at is an absolute icon, even the way you explored quaritch. his character is so complex, a much crueler version of him whose end was very satisfying. the whole expansion you made on na'vi culture and the connection between clans. tsireya, ao'nung, rotxo, even tonowari and ronal, they were not featured much but you managed to bring something fresh and new to them, fitting the twists of this story. i could say the same with tuk and kiri, i wish we'd had more of them but every time they were in a scene, they were an absolute delight and i can't wait to have more of them in the sequel. lo'ak, gosh i could say so many things about him, he is the character who touched me the most in atwow and every little additions you made to his character made me love him a little more. since spider is his big bro and not just his best friend, it changes so many things about his character. you gave us a much more mature version of him and i'm so proud of the journey he went through. now one of the biggest surprises i would say is neteyam! he didn't particularly stuck with me in canon, surely because his character is less present than the other kids and jc made a totally unnecessary decision that destroyed me. but fanon made me change my mind, and this fic played a big part in it. again it's so hard to speak of this neteyam without bringing up spider, and to see his character so impacted by the loss of his brother, with so much anger and frustration and sadness and hurt, god it was so devastating and heartbreaking. which leads us to the one and only spider!!!! our little guy, who's been through so much and yet remains that sweet kid who manages to see the goodness in people. he wormed his way in people's hearts, got a loving family and caring friends, and was ready to do everything in his power to protect them. he cares so much for his people and for his world, and life has been so hard on him but he proved everyone he deserved to be here and he's worthy!

honourary mention for the way you depicted the na'vi relationship with animals. payakan, the discovery of tsuraks and ilus, THE IKRANS. but most important of them all, my guy GUY <333 i miss him so much, and his bond with spider was the most wholesome thing. they were not able to communicate like others can and yet we saw how the trust between them grew through care to become this beautiful companionship. my life will not be complete until i see them reuniting and be one again

and last but no least, malachy! don't worry i didn't forget about him—how could i? this is just another proof of how good your writing is; you made me care so much about some original character whose foundations had everything to make me hate him. but you gave him an insane backstory, compassion and mercy, a brain, and this exceptional change of heart. i remember you wondering if we were interested in reading from his pov, and already then i wanted a more nuanced stance within the rda. you gave us everything i wanted and more with this character. he went through his own fulfilling journey and i know there's still so much more to learn about him, and he still have so much to learn from pandora, and i'm so glad he made it out alive thus far!

another massive thank you for you, lottie. i wish i could reach through my screen and give you a hug for everything you gave us with this story. your talent is boundless, you made these characters feel so real and i couldn't be happier that you decided to write this sequel because i don't want this story to end just yet. i'm not ready to say goodbye to them so i'm very excited to see where this next ride will take us <333333

Babes, bestie THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR AMAZING COMMENTS!

I'm stunned my work got you to come out of your commenting shell because your essays were literally one of the comments I looked forward to each chapter. And that you have a routine stop you're gonna make me sob-- TT_TT

I literally don't know what I can say that will say thank you for your words and love for this story so just please take my love and hugs and everything else babes.

And thank you for loving Malachy!! I'm glad he's been accepted by readers because it was a bit nerve wracking to create a character like his.

Thank you my love, one hundred times thank you

<333

[batfamfucker]

Lori Grimes Is Overhated And Deserves Better (Hear Me Out)

Okay. So. I'm rewatching The Walking Dead from S1. The last time I watched S1 was when it was airing and I was 9/10 (No, not appropriate but alas) and. I remember hating Lori. But I'm rewatching. And I'm on S3. And.

What did she actually do fucking wrong? She's fine. She literally hasn't done anything to deserve the amount of hate she gets. In fact, she went through so much and died so soon. In S3 she mentions how she knows she's a shit wife and not a good mother. But. I don't see why. At the end of S2 Rick and Carl love her. But at the start of S3 they just randomly hate her? What happened in those nine months between the seasons because it's never explained? I get if things were tense because she was pregnant and they were on the run, but Rick wanted her to keep the baby? How is that her fault? It just feels out of nowhere. I legit don't even think she did anything wrong.

People are mainly always like 'She almost got an abortion :(' Bro it's literally the fucking apocalypse. One) She did it with pills she didn't even know would work. Two) She didn't even go through with it. Three) God, if I was her, I would've. That would've been the only option I would've considered.

There are no safe places, they're barely keeping Carl alive, Sophia is missing (Aka, not exactly a kid friendly world), there is no more modern medicine and she could die from complications and/or childbirth (Which she did) leaving her son to grieve his mother this time just as he did with Rick before they knew he wasn't dead. And what sort of world is this for a baby? She said it herself, it would grow up fighting from day one. If it cried, it could attract a horde and get everyone killed, etc. What if Lori is malnourished and can't feed it? They can't just find formula. It, at this stage with them only knowing of their own group, may never have an education, or friends, etc. It would just survive. What life is that? (We know better now, but the group didn't know if that could ever happen at the time. They had no context to believe otherwise).

I cannot fathom people thinking that was a bad choice on her part. And she didn't even do it, instead she died giving birth to that kid. She gave her life because she wanted her child to have a chance at one instead. And people hate her.

The only other thing I can think of is the Shane stuff. But she thought Rick was dead and was grieving everything. Not just her husband and the father of her child, but her own parents (Which she mentioned), and literally the entire world. God forbid she's getting dicked down to deal with it??? Having an ounce of something good amongst all her grieving?? Needing something, anything to cling onto? And the minute she realises Rick is alive, she stops her and Shane's 'thing' immediately. And Shane literally sexually assaults her! And people hate her but like him? Are you fucking kidding me? And she never told Rick! She still tried to be civil with Shane, because he was Rick's best friend! And Carl loved him! She kept it a secret and was civil with him, even though she was understandably scared of him and uncomfortable around him, for them. So that they wouldn't lose Shane. She remained civil with a man that sexually assaulted her for the sake of her family's happiness over her own, and even her own safety. She only warned Rick she didn't like Shane when he started seeming like he was a threat to Rick and her kids. That's it. All of it was for them.

Then people say that she seemed upset at Shane's death. Personally I like to think she was upset at the fact that Carl was the one that had to shoot him. Because she seemed shocked but it wasn't until that line where Rick admits Carl shot him that she actually seems upset. And that she was still processing the 'we're all infected thing'. And maybe even guilt thinking it was her fault that her husband had to kill his best friend, and her son had to shoot him too when he turned. Her baby was forced to kill someone when he's, what, 10? Which is what she was trying desperately to avoid?

Which brings us back to the 'not child friendly world' thing. She's now realising that if she dies, her and the baby become walkers. Or if the baby dies, it could rip her open after turning. And with Carl she had to have a C section. That might be the case this time again. And with no modern medicine, and the farm also now gone, how does she know she won't die after it's born and turn, immediately attacking the newborn and anyone around her? Or the baby is stillborn and she has to watch it turn after just giving birth to it? Essentially, the whole pregnancy is even more dangerous now. And maybe it will be born. Maybe they'll both be fine. But how long until it might have to kill someone like Carl had to? A child having to have something that heavy on their shoulders?

All that. All the things she dealt with and people blame her for all of it.

It just. It reeks of misogyny. I'm so sorry for hating her when I was 10 and didn't know any better. She deserved so much better. If she'd gotten more time, she could've been great. I think she was anyway. She defended Rick all the time, looked after Carl, was there for Carol and Sophia, etc. And people shit on her so much. She was fine. Just wasted potential.

The dramatic car crash over a single walker scene was ridiculous and kinda funny to be honest but I blame the writers more than the character. I don't even know why that was necessary. Like why did they even write it. They were really tryna make her seem useless.

Basically, Sarah Wayne Callies (Who plays Lori) was absolutely right. Lori woulda been great if she was written by a woman.

Lori Grimes, I'm sorry, you deserved fucking better.

[sabineelectricheart]

Belated Prom

Summary: Teuta has never gone to a school dance before. Limbo will not let this stand.

Rating: K+ - Suitable for more mature childen, 9 years and older, with minor action violence without serious injury. May contain mild coarse language. Should not contain any adult themes.

Words: 1200

Notes: Just Limbo being cute. Nothing else to see here, folks.

“Hold up, that’s crazy. You’ve never been to a dance before?” Limbo asks, eyebrows raising.

Teuta shrugs, ducking her head. “Yeah. A lot of things happened when I was supposed to go, and they were never really my thing, anyways.”

“That’s crazy!” He petulantly exclaims.

The brunette journalist glares at him, rather offended. “Limbo, between the six of us, you’re the only one who attended prom. If we’re going by that metric, you’re the crazy person here.”

“Well, yeah, but Shu has his hitman hitlist, Helvetica is all over with his mysterious past of his, Crow was home-schooled and Mozu’s Mozu.” He points out, making sure to count them on his fingers for rhetoric effect. “You don’t have any of those excuses, do you?”

“I just don’t like them, Limbo! Even if my brother hadn’t died, I still probably wouldn’t want to go.” She responded, pouting.

“Nonsense.” The man dismissed it. “Every teen wants to go to their prom. Did no one ever ask you or what?” 

“No.” Teuta says softly.

“What?”

“No, no-one ever asked me. You’re right about that.” She elaborated, looking away from him. “Well, Adam did, but that was just a pity date. I’m sorry that I blew him off that night, though.”

His eyes widen in incredulity. Limbo truly did not think that this would be the reason why she never went to any school dance, her brother’s death notwithstanding, or else he would not have pointed out in such a direct and crass manner. Besides, she is his girlfriend and she is amazing, he cannot fathom why she would not be sought after at school.

“Well, then those stupid teens are blind and don’t know what they were missing out on.” The lawyer argues, eloquent. “It’s their loss because you are fucking amazing.” 

“You don’t have to say that to make me feel better, Limbo. It’s fine, I’m okay with it, I promise.” She tells him, face warming.

Limbo frowns. “But I’m not just saying that. It’s true.” 

In fact, he knows very well that Adam never intended it as a pity date, but he would not like to call her attention to that constatation. Nevertheless, that sucks, and he wishes that he could give her that teenage princess debutante experience, even if she insists that she is fine with it.

Suddenly, his face lights up with an idea.

Teuta shoots him a look. “Hey, what’s going on in that head of yours? I know that look. You’re brainstorming something, aren’t you?”

He smirked. “I just got the best idea. Go over to Valerie’s apartment, I’ll call her and tell that you’re on your way. Do everything she says, and then she’ll drop you back here when we’re ready.”

The woman splutters. “What? Who’s we? What do you…?”

“Just do it!” He grins, shoving at her shoulder gently. “No questions! No second-thinking! Go.”

“Alright, alright, I’m going.” Teuta laughs, raising her hands up. “I’m going.”

*_*_*_*_*

If Teuta Bridges was not aware that Valerie Fitzgerald was an intense woman, now she certainly has no further doubts.

As soon as she reaches the apartment front door, the attorney comes out, purse in hand, and begins tugging her away back downstairs and into a taxi cab.

After a few minutes of a walk outside in the chilly night air, the young journalist finally makes it back to her place. She tries to make herself as busy as possible to make the time go by quicker, but it feels like it ticks by slowly despite her efforts. The whole time, she wonders what Limbo could possibly be planning that it took having her occupied for the whole afternoon, but her mind draws a blank.

Whatever it was that Valerie had to have her measured up and down, it had taken them over three hours and four tailors to have it bought and delivered in a black cardboard box. She sent her boyfriend a text to let him know they were on their way over and throws her coat on before heading outside.

The district attorney left her on the sidewalk in front of her brother’s apartment complex, handing Teuta the box with the instructions to go up and knock on his door.

She does as she is told, and Limbo opens the door after the first knock, grinning like a madman. She furrows her eyebrows when she hears the music playing softly from the other room. 

“Limbo, what’s going on?” The journalists asks, looking straight at the man’s eye.

“Come on it and see it for yourself! You’re going to love this.” He says, taking her hand and pulling her along.

When he leads her into the small living room at his underused apartment, her mouth drops open. 

“Limbo, this is…” The brunette breathes out, fascinated.

Candles are littered around the room, emitting a soft glow. The couches and armchair were pushed out to the corner, having the middle cleared out to have a small dancefloor, and music plays softly from a speaker set up near the TV set.

“I thought, you know, if you didn’t go to prom or whatever other high school dance, then… Why not recreate the experience for you?” The lawyer shrugs, non-committedly. “At least now you can have a positive memory of them, and not just the Zora stuff.”

Teuta thinks her heart might explode. Tears pool in her eyes and a few manage to escape, trailing down her cheeks.

“I can’t believe you did this for me!” She tells him, voice cracking. “How did you…?”

“The guys helped. And Valerie, too, naturally.” He smiles sheepishly, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Inside that box there is a prom dress, for you to change. The others will drop by later, too, and Carmen’s catering.”

“I don’t know what to say. Genuinely, I don’t.” She choked.

Limbo takes her trembling hands in his and pulls his girlfriend to him. “Then don’t say anything, okay? Just enjoy it.”

One of his hands raises to cup her cheek, wiping the tears away with the pad of his thumb. She sends him a wobbly smile, and he grins back at her, resting both his hands on her waist. She wraps her arms around his shoulders, running her hands through his soft, tousled locks.

“Thank you.” Teuta whispers.

He smiles indulgently. “Yeah, of course. You deserve to experience something special like this.”

Teuta lets out a deep breath and rests her head against his chest, his arms tightening around her waist.

“I hope… I hope you know how much you mean to me. That this is enough to express it.” He says softly. 

Her heart flips. “Yeah, Limbo. I do. You mean a lot to me, too. More than I could ever say.” 

He breathes out a laugh and rests his chin atop her head. “I know, beautiful. You bent space-time for me once, remember? I’m the one playing catch-up.” 

Warmth blooms in her chest at the nickname. The two of them continue to sway gently, and the feeling of Limbo’s arms around her and the sound of his heartbeat loud in her ear make she feel safe, content.

There’s nowhere else that Teuta would rather be.

*_*_*_*_*

Bustafellows Masterlist

[badedramay]

I just want to say, I knew it would happen but it’s still gross to see the double standards, but how Maya and wahaj were raked over the coals for their mushq photoshoot but YumHaj and even Hamza and Seher are getting tons of praise for their equally as scandalous poses is …super amusing. I’ve never seen quite as much misogyny come from other women as I did for maya in that one photo shoot, but other actresses doing the exact same thing is ok because that’s a fan favorite pair. (Also, I think it’s stupid how our awaam cannot fathom a pairing outside of a recent hit; people complain about wahaj and his “overexposure” post TB, but they also don’t want him to be anything besides Murtasim. Like bro needs to act with others, too, but the audience out there behaves like someone committed blasphemy when an actor from a hit pairing acts with someone else.). To be clear, I don’t want any actress receiving hate for doing her job, it’s just sad how blatant the hate was and for such a stupid reason that Maya wasn’t yumna.

And also I’m just gonna say it—nobody in any recent photo shoot had the chemistry of maya and wahaj. You can just tell how comfortable they are with each other. They did hot, innocent, longing, surprise, admiration…literally everything. What range, yo. Even if for notorious reasons, people are still talking about the Mushq photo shoot while their faves’ photo sessions came and went without making any waves sorry not sorry.

Finally, I’ve been seeing people start to blame Maya for the downfall of wahaj post-TB, as if she forced him to sign MPHT, Mein, etc. Like it is so ridiculous out there, we are blaming a woman instead of holding a grown ass actor accountable for not choosing better roles.

Khaled Hosseini said it for men but the quote fits here as well cuz eh..it's a man involved.

“Like a compass needle that points north, a man's accusing finger always finds a woman. Always.”

just replace "man" with "fangirls of a man".

i have this shit behavior happen across the board again and again that I now consciously try to be numb to it. it's always the same. blame the woman. blame her for coming in between a ship. or blame her for being close to the man. or blame her for just existing. in all cases the man is the bechara masoom who doesn't know any better. it's the woman who has trapped him. it's the woman being insecure. it's the woman controlling his every action. never man, never him. and of course it's always the women who blame the woman.

you didn't mention Anmol Baloch here. Hamza Sehar fans are also hating on her because Hamza did the ghor paap of working with her and promoting his show with her. idk how true the rumors of their relationship are; they shouldn't MEAN anything. like any other pairing, Anmol and Hamza had all the right to do photoshoots in character to promote on their insta pages. that is not a right reserved just for their fav jodi. ANY fav jodi. these are actors. it's the world of social media. promotion on their public accounts is now a part of their JOB. they are all fucking PAID for it. and when money is involved, more times than less it becomes the main motivation. if these fans think their favs don't ask for money to promote their certain fav jodi because that's where their "true love and passion" lies then..i don't even know what to say.

and really I pity Wahaj as well. his own "fans" are close to blackmailing him to not expand his boundaries at all. him doing multiple photoshoots is "overexposure" but him doing them with Yumna is "using the small window of opportunity of being the most popular thing in the industry to its maximum benefit." arey??? it just comes down to what kind of fandom one has amassed over their career. like if on one hand Wahaj fans are criticizing his overexposure, MK fans are making flippant comments about inflation that has made MK do back to back three bridal campaigns. hypocrisy? i don't even wanna care.

frankly i am TIRED of searching Maya's name and seeing it just in connection with Wahaj. i love Mushq. MY BESTIE SERVED ME IN WAYS I CANNOT EXPLAIN! just last night i was rewatching the clips and oh my HEART it's beautiful beautiful beautiful BEAUTIFULLLLLL!! but i have to admit i HATE how Maya's entire existence has been shrunk to that photoshoot only. she's being used both by the yumhaj fans and the non-yumhaj fans as a weapon to use to attack others or defend their own favs. i doubt any one really cares about HER because then i'd actually see her be talked about individually or her projects. but no. it's always "they have been friends for years". like yes so WHAT? baar baar mention karna zaroori hai???

it's just no use trying to sense with these kind of people. i can only hope we get an official annoucement of Maya's next work again so she can leave this behind.

[decayandfanfics]

Blood-song

Warnings: Angst, Violence, Blood. Yandere themes. Alusions of sex. Unhealthy relationships. Mild fluff.

FemReader x Gyutaro.

A/n: As always english is not my first language so bear with me. Also this is very self indulgent. Just saying

_________________________________________________________

It began with fear.

Your fear.

But it has grown on you into something far more sinister. Something dark and insidious.

Perverted even.

No, you don’t believe there is a word to define you or him. The want, the horror, the evilness.

To define this.

But you think if you ever call it something, if you ever dared to put a name on it.

It would be love.

_____

He’s not a gentle creature. You’ve learned the hard way.

Gyutaro’s fingers bruise and scratch. Bones digging into the soft parts of you until your flesh blossoms in violets under his concupiscent touch. Too tough, too sharp against your weak human body, but he cannot help his own brutality. It is just the nature of his attention to claw and take whatever he wants, and he’d never wanted anything as he wants you.

It began with your fear and his unquenchable hunger. The music of your beating heart calling him like a song only he could hear. Blood flowing lively inside the branches of your veins, enthralling the monster that lives on the roof.

He used to stalk you through Daki’s eyes, wanting to devour you so bad he could smell your blood from across the house. Sickly sweet notes that drove him insane, filling his dead lungs, pushing him to the edge ready to tear you apart.

He’s a monster. Cold, cruel thing that relishes in the cries of terror of weak pathetic humans like lambs in the slaughterhouse, and he’s more than ready to hear you shriek.

But then you caught a glimpse of him in some shady hallway by sheer luck, protected by the herd of girls at dawn, in the blue hours when the night still ligers but the morning has already begun.

When he cannot risk being stricken by the morning light.

The rest he cannot fathom.

You looked for his deadly eyes in the darkness. Gaze lingering on the empty corners and dark corridors, terrified of what may lurk in the shadows, but oh…so curious. And when you finally found him, you told him your name despite your fear and asked his in return with steady voice and soft eyes, tilting his world to drag everything towards you, nailing yourself inside of him until he couldn’t differentiate between hunger and yearning anymore.

This sick attachment is your fault. A pretty, lively thing like you looking for the likes of him. Are you stupid? Are you mad? Don’t you know what demons do to girls like you? You are so weak and pathetic. He's going to kill you; he wants to kill you.

But you were interested in him. You asked his name and wondered about his nature, his eyes, the color of his hair.

No other girl had even spared him a look if not to be repulsed. No other girl has ever tried to come closer to his twisted form. 

That’s how it happens. That’s how he ended up spilling mindless words about everything and nothing, filling the space that separated you both until it wasn’t enough, until he leaned in and kissed you instead of biting your face off and the taste was like anything he ever had.

It happens once, twice…

I’m going to kill you.

 three, fourth…

 I’m going to eat you.

 Fifth, 

I want devour you.

Sixth…

I want…I want…I want…

You.

And then it is too many times too late. Your taste already stuck on his tongue just like the ghost of your warmth against his palms. Smiles and words like a splinter inside his chest, digging painfully, beautifully into his rotten heart. 

That’s how he ends up branding you. Marks of his hunger all over your skin and his words thundering in your ears like an omen.

"Mine, mine, mine."

He never wanted anything as he wanted you.

And for some sick, twisted reason, you want him too.

_____

You manage to avoid working. The house owner is concerned by the plethora of bruises that decorate your skin thinking you ill. But you know no one lives for free in Ogimoto house, so you keep yourself useful in other ways. You wash, you clean, you cook and dress the other girls, praying for it to be enough, praying that you don’t have to share yourself again.

Gyutaro would kill you before letting that happen. He will murder everyone after that.

You just hope you don’t run out of luck.

_____

You memorize the dark patches of skin that decorate his crooked frame and the sharp angles that conform his body. Tender fingers drawing patterns of warmth over the expanse of his marred chest. You also learn the way his hand curves over your cheek perfectly when he feels gentle, and the motion of his palm ruffling through your hair when he teases you lightly.

He picks up the ring of your heart when you fall asleep next to him and the color of your laugh when he makes fun of distant warriors you know nothing of. He also memorizes the rhythm of your pulse through your highs when he makes you tense and sigh for him, and the sweet curve where your ribs meet your waist, right above the weight of your enticing hips.

Gyutaro laughs each time. Maniacal and terrifying sound that leaves his throat as he leers at your naked form. Pointy teeth peeking behind his lips before drawing another crescent moon of blood over the parts of you he loves the most, pressing you against his twisted anatomy, trying to cage you inside his chest and meld you to his marrow.

“You are so pretty. The most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen” he pants before biting your lips for a kiss you will never deny him, not when he’s sinking in you, delighted in your ragged breathing and painful yelps as he fills and defiles you .

It’s intoxicating to be this wanted.

It might be poisonous too.

“I’m not scared” you repeat every time he lances into you.

“You should” he snarls, nuzzling over the skin of your jaw, “You should be terrified.” A warning that never fails to precede the violence of his want, but you let him take everything with a smile on your lips and a whisper on your throat, to then hide the wounds of his corruption on you, keeping the soft parts of his touch to yourself; the sweetness, the playfulness, the praise.

Time has shown you that men don’t love this way. They don’t carry a hollowing hunger around like a curse because human nature is simpler. Humans satisfy themselves with little and once they have their fill, they don’t ache anymore.

But not him. Gyutaro wants to possess you in every way imaginable, never enough. Servant, queen and fare to his damned eyes. A meek stupid useless human. The most beautiful human. The only one that matters.

“Let me ruin you. Let me have you...” 

And you indulge him, let him pierce you. Until you cannot hold yourself anymore. 

_____

Gyutaro grows unhinged, turning himself feral in time. The more he lets you in, the more you love him, the more he starves.

You kiss him, and he pictures your neck breaking like a twig on his murderous hands. Razor-sharp teeth sinking into your flesh as your blood floods his mouth, gliding deliciously down his throat while you choke a moan, eyes wide open and cheeks splattered in red.

You are so pretty. He thinks. And you’d look even more beautiful dying in his arms as he devours your soft agonizing heart, drinking you dry, to then feast on your flesh until there’s nothing but your lovely bones.

And then you’d be gone.

It would be just him and Ume again. No more would your soft hands warm his stained cheeks, nor would your lips spell lies of beauty he doesn’t possess.Your heart would no longer sing for him and his macabre violence to come and feast and gorge in your touch.

And so Gyutaro seethes and growls like an animal. Shoves you away like you burn him, dead weight falling over the tatami, adding bruises to the bite marks that litter your hips.

“You are so weak! So damn fragile! I hate you!” he yells, nails clawing all over his ashen skin because he cannot stand the idea of silence filling the space of your pulse. He imagines the following quietness of your demise and the thought pierces something in the pit of his scabrous darkened heart.

He hates you so much, yet he cannot kill you.

You make him sick, make him weak, you make him crave you.

And for it he punishes you with cruel indifference and selfishness. Tells you the gruesome part of his fantasies where he rips you from the inside out and doesn’t care enough for your irrelevant fleeting life until you cry, until you run away to hide in some remote corner of the house as he vanishes into deadly shadows.

At night, he hunts outside the house; far away from you at the skirts of the red city.

Gyutaro massacres and eats more than he can count with both hands.

Feels like starving, nonetheless

_____

Gyutaro goes back to Daki after his rampage leaving you alone for a couple of days in retaliation. The vengeful part of him delighted in making you suffer at your audacity of existing in this feeble fleeting form.

You don’t know you are being watched through Daki’s eyes though, wasting your time looking at empty hallways with trembling heart, peering into the dark foyers looking for him to no avail.

It pleases him beyond words to be the cause of your anguish. He’s even tempted to go out just to pat your head and congratulate you for the pitiful scene.

You cry at night in the solitude of your room, thinking he’s gone, believing every venomous word that left his mouth. How stupid of you.

You are his, he’s not going anywhere.

But that doesn’t make him show up. He likes you like this, it is kind of enjoyable even. To see you broken and grieving for the crumbs of his attention. His colossal pride obscuring over his own yearning and the pang of solitude that comes with his newly found fun.

Until it’s not fun anymore

Gyutaro watches you dance and play your part as a courtesan, a fact that’s been easier to forget when he gets to breathe from your mouth every night, repeating the mantra he’s carved over your heart with his own teeth.

“Yours, yours, yours.”

But in his disappearance he took your luck with him and now you are getting paid for acting like you are no one’s. Your bright kimono flows around your body until it opens, revealing the flesh he longs to bite, and he notices that the trace of his hands has already started to fade from your skin.

Wrenching, raw jealousy hits him so hard it almost makes Daki throw up in front of everyone.

She cast him away from her after that. She cannot stomach whatever pathetic fixation he has on you right now.

“Just go and kill her already! Stop this stupid game of cat and mouse.”

Through the roofs he follows you to your room, sneaking over your balcony to find a client getting drunk on the smell of your loose hair. His hands slithering there where the bruises made by his bony hips began disappearing into yellow tints, right where your vein pulses hot between your legs.

You are no longer marked. His touch has faded from you. You are not his anymore.

Nails rack deep into his face as the feral growl climbs from the depths of his chest. Gyutaro shakes seething, jealousy so jarring he sees red.

You feel the pull and impact that sends you to the ground before a pained yelp of warning. Next thing you are covered in blood that’s not yours. A mass of meat and bones with human robes at your feet and Gyutaro’s bloodied mouth dripping dark blots all over the tatami, his massive body looming over you.

Like a monster.

You were supposed to be his. You told him you were HIS.

Oh, the jealousy, the envy filling him with hatred. Eyes maddened, glowing with demonic power in the darkness like the monster he’s always been.

You should have been terrified. He’d warned you.

He leers across the skin of your inner thigh, where your pulse calls him just by the warmth of your core where only he gets to touch you. His mind fills with visions of you yielding under his raw strength as he licks and gnaws at your flesh, completely drunk on your blood. Sunken deep inside of you as he pins you under him to gorge on your body.

He’s never wanted anything like he wants you. And your blood calls him, it always has. It always will.

"Don’t you know what demons do to girls like you?"

Time stops as he jumps you. His mouth crashing against yours furiously with a kiss that feels more like a stab. Desire and horror sharpening against your frantic, horrified heart.

It's love. He realizes. He fucking loves you. And his dead chest swells with the realization. 

He would never kill you; he just wants to keep you inside.

He wants to devour you whole.

So he reach out his hand...

"Let me ruin you..."

...and pulls taut at your hair…

"Let me have you..."

…the song of your scared pulse jumping in the column of your neck.

Then you scream.

Then he bites.

[ladynestaarcheron]

Shattered

ao3

A month or so ago I read that one tweet and I haven't been able to get it out of my head. Most likely a one-shot, but you know how these things go. AU where Cassian actually makes an effort when Nesta is actively killing herself. Enjoy!

---

The nights of the Night Court have no shortage of beauty, but it has been a long while since Cassian has experienced any of them the way they were meant to be enjoyed. He only has three kinds of nights now.

The first are the nights Nesta Archeron does not leave her apartment. Months ago, he had been agitated by how frequent these nights were. He could kick himself for it. How precious those nights are to him now, the nights when he only has to worry about how she's feeling and not if someone else will hurt her. These nights are few and far between.

Most common are the nights where he watches. She leaves a little after eight. He doesn't know how she chooses whatever dump she spends the evening in--she favors the White Wolf, but he cannot fathom why. He watches her enter the establishment and survey the crowd. She picks her table carefully. She'll play the males sitting there. She'll win. And sometimes, she'll take one home.

Watching is the hardest thing he's ever had to do. But he can't always stop her. Because then she'll stop listening to him on the nights where he has to. The nights where he intervenes.

The nights where he intervenes are the worst of his life. The first one had been terrifying beyond belief, and they haven't gotten any better.

She had been drunk. Really drunk. Not as drunk as he'd been on his messier nights, but certainly far more than she had ever been before. He knew he was going to walk her home--but then she took a male's hand and began tugging him out the door.

Cassian wanted to flay him alive for even considering taking her to bed when she could barely walk, but the male pled ignorance and ran. It was either chase him down or make sure Nesta got to bed safely--hardly a choice.

He thought she'd learned her lesson, and would stay away from stronger stuff. He was wrong.

He remembers when the drinks were the worst of it. Now it's the males.

They're all scum. None of them worthy of her. None of them with any spine or--or--whatever it is Nesta surely wants. But some of them are worse. Some of them are dangerous.

They stay away, for the most part. Everyone who frequents Velaris' slums knows to look out for him, for the Lord of Bloodshed who sweeps in on blackness, murder in his eyes when someone goes too far with Lady Nesta Archeron. But sometimes--gods, it makes him sick--she beckons to them. And they don't turn her down. Mother above, who would ever turn her down?

She can drink. She can fuck undeserving males if she wants to. But he won't let her go home with someone who would hurt her.

And on a night like tonight, when the male she's chosen has two knives hidden under his belt and she's skipped her past few meals and drunk three glasses of brown liquor--no. It won't happen. Not so long as he's alive.

Nesta's coat is stained with wine and she could use a new pair of shoes, but her hair is perfect as ever. She was born to be a queen, to be worshipped. Who else comes naturally equipped with a golden crown shining atop her head?

"This one," Nesta says, gesturing to her apartment building. "Third floor."

"That's a long walk up," the male murmurs, tugging her away from the door and pushing her against the wall. "Why don't we start down here?"

He leans in, to kiss her. Right there in the street. And Nesta--she would allow it. Nesta, who doesn't wear her hair unbound in front of her sisters, who's never worn anything cut below her clavicle, who only let Cassian kiss her in front of others when they thought they wouldn't live to see another day--

"Good evening," he calls, and the male jerks backwards. Maybe not as stupid as the one she brought home last night, then. "How are you tonight, Nesta?"

"What are you doing here?" she seethes.

Making her angry on these nights are his only chances to see that fire in her eyes nowadays.

He gives her a lazy grin, which he knows makes her see red. "Out for a stroll." He glances at the male. "What are you doing here?"

"I live here."

"Mm...he doesn't."

The male takes a step back. His eyes dart between Nesta and Cassian. Without a word, he disappears into the night.

Nesta blinks. Exhales through her nose with a slump. She closes her eyes and stands there for three long seconds, before opening them and shoving past him.

He grabs her arm. "Nesta, I..." Is she...hurt? That's not what he wanted. It's not as though the male has rejected her. And she didn't actually like him, so what does it matter? He doesn't know what to say. To reassure her that there is no shortage of males eager to take his place--no, he doesn't want to say that. Instead he says the truest thing he can think of. "You're better than he is."

She raises her head slowly, from the ground to his hand on her arm and then his face. For a moment, he thinks the anger will come back, that she'll shout at him. He'll taunt her. Offer her a chance to take him up to her rooms and make her forget about the other male. She'll spit at him, storm up the steps, slam the door in his face.

But nothing happens. Her eyes are a blank, lifeless grey. "Let go of me," she says.

He doesn't. Can't. He's afraid she'll fall.

"You're worth so much more than any of them, Nesta."

A flicker of recognition in her eyes, but it's not him she's seeing. "When I was...around nine or so," she starts, and Cassian's heart skips a beat. She's never talked to him like this before.

"We had this vase. Priceless. From the Continent. This ancient dynasty...we had a book about it. The vase was printed in the book. And Elain and Feyre were running around the house...and they broke it. I was...distraught. I cried. My mother came and she saw and she told me...that it was just a replica. It wasn't real. And she called the maid over to clean it up.

"I remember looking down at the pieces of the vase, shattered on the floor. It didn't even matter. It didn't even matter that it was broken. It was worthless, and no one cared."

Cassian can't breathe. She blinks, seeing him again, dazed. She breaks out of his grip and leaves to her building.

He lets her go. But he doesn't move for hours.

Nesta wakes up heaving over the toilet. There isn't enough in her stomach to push up, so it's a painful ten minutes, but not a messy one.

Bright side, she thinks to herself flatly.

Her head is pounding. There hadn't been a mediocre orgasm last night at the hands of some male to push the pain away, and she had walked upstairs too upset with Cassian to use her own hand.

He had said something to her. She can't remember what. Or she doesn't care to, not right now. This headache is too sharp to bother thinking...

Hours later, she can stand without wincing. There's no food in her kitchen, so she'll have to visit the market for some broth. Only thing she can stomach, when she bothers.

She only fixes her hair, but she doesn't change. She's wearing a coat anyway, what does it matter if the dress underneath is from yesterday, slept in? It doesn't.

She opens her front door. At her feet lies a brown box. Atop it, a bag from a foodshop.

Take it or leave it? Nesta considers her options. She doesn't want to accept anything from him, but if it means she doesn't have to leave her apartment while the sun is up...

Nesta sighs irritably, bending down to pick up the packages. She lets out a small "Oof" in surprise--it's heavier than she had expected.

She places the box on the table and opens the bag. Broth, like she had intended for herself. And a loaf of bread, still warm.

With the bag fluttering to the ground, Nesta can see a note is taped to the top of the box. She opens it and reads, in an unfamiliar, messy scrawl: I care.

She frowns. It must be from Cassian. But whatever riddle or drama this is, she doesn't know or have any interest it.

Her frown deepens as she opens the box. Then she looks inside and sees. And remembers.

Cassian hadn't said much to her, but she had spoken to him.

She can hardly breathe as she takes the vase out. She holds it gingerly in her hands--and almost drops it when she registers what she's seeing.

The vase is white, where theirs had been red. But it...it has been shattered. Smashed on the floor into pieces, like theirs had been.

Like she is.

But this vase...has been pieced back together.

And on each piece, outlined with a thick gray paste, in the same messy scrawl as the note is written...something.

Your eyes.

The way you stand up for Elain.

The way you never let fear stop you from doing the right thing.

How your hair is always perfect.

She stops reading after that. Can't. Can't even see.

Eventually, she puts the vase back in the box. It's too much to look at.

But she eats the broth. Finishes it.

She doesn't go out that night. She doesn't want to. Instead, she sits at her table.

Just shy of midnight, she opens the box.

[magnetic-rose]

Why Spones is a top-tier ship

AKA “the inherent homoeroticism of annoying the shit out of your co-worker.”

Spock and McCoy have a complicated relationship. A lot of their bickering and ideological differences lead fans to believe that they hate each other, but that’s an over-simplification of the truth. The reality is that Spock and McCoy are extremely close friends who care about each other deeply. Though sometimes their bickering turns serious during stressful situations, for the most time they seem to enjoy the banter. A common mischaracterization of their relationship seems to put McCoy as the bully and Spock as the victim. In truth, there are many times where Spock will say something specifically to get a rise out of McCoy. They fight. That’s how they show affection, not disdain. In fact, one could argue that some of their bantering have a flirtatious tone to it.

Kirk: Mister Spock, regaining eyesight would be an emotional experience for most. You, I assume, felt nothing.

Spock: On the contrary Captain. I had a very strong reaction. My first sight was the face of Doctor McCoy bending over me.

McCoy: ‘Tis a pity brief blindness didn’t increase your appreciation for beauty, Spock. (Operation -- Annihilate!)

Spock is a half-Vulcan, half-Human who has mostly chosen to follow his Vulcan heritage. As such, he is a being of almost pure logic. The truth about Vulcans are that they are secretly beings who feel things very deeply and intensely, and they feel the need to keep a tight lid on their emotions as to not succumb to them. McCoy, on the other hand, is a regular human. He’s a deeply emotional man who cares about others. One could argue that McCoy is almost too empathetic, as he lets his emotions rule him. Spock and McCoy are polar opposites; the brain and the heart, the logic and the emotion, the super-ego and the id.

Despite these differences, the two men are similar in a lot of ways. They’re both men of science, men of peace, and they both care very deeply for their Captain. They’re both self-sacrificing morons, to the chagrin of the other. Spock will prioritize McCoy’s life even when both of them know it’s not the logical choice to do so. Likewise, McCoy will take a hit for Spock even when they both know the Vulcan is stronger and better equipped to deal with pain than the doctor.

Spock: (In the middle of a blizzard) In this severe cold, we cannot survive much longer.

McCoy: Leave me here, Spock.

Spock: We go together or not at all.

McCoy: Don’t be a fool. My hands and face are frostbitten. I can’t feel my feet. Alone, you have a chance. Now do what I say. Go try to find Jim.

Spock: We go together! (All of Yesterdays)

In the episode, “The Empath,” Kirk, Spock and McCoy have to choose someone to be offered as sacrifice to be tortured by a group of aliens. Kirk obviously volunteers, but gets put to sleep by McCoy with a tranquilizer. Spock then states that he’ll offer himself up, as he has the higher chance of surviving the torture. McCoy then proceeds to sedate Spock as well, and sacrifices himself to be tortured by the aliens.

Spock: While the captain is asleep, I am in command. When the Vians return, I shall go with them.

McCoy: You mean, if I hadn't given him that shot

Spock: Precisely. The choice would have been the captain's. Now it is mine.

(McCoy turns away. Spock sits to carry on working. Gem puts her hand on Spock's shoulder, and smiles. McCoy comes up behind him and gives him an injection.)

Spock: Your action is highly unethical. My decision stands. (Spock falls asleep next to Kirk.)

McCoy: Not this time, Spock.

Underneath all the fighting and disagreements, there is a deep caring between Spock and McCoy that manifests itself into protectiveness towards each other. In “All of Yesterdays,” Spock is constantly showing concern for McCoy after he almost died of hypothermia. In aftermath of McCoy’s torture in “The Empath,” Spock is seen hovering over his body and caressing his face, worry written into his features. On the other hand, while McCoy constantly makes fun of Spock for his lack of emotions, he’s also highly aware of the Vulcan’s mental state and protective of it when others threaten to shatter his resilience.

McCoy: He's a Vulcan. You can't force emotion out of him.

Philana: You must be joking, Doctor.

McCoy: You'll destroy him.

Parmen: We can't let him die laughing, can we?

McCoy: (Watching as Spock starts to cry) I beg you! (Plato’s Stepchildren)

The episode “Amok Time” also demonstrates McCoy’s perceptiveness of Spock and Spock’s true feelings of friendship towards McCoy. McCoy is in fact the first person to notice that something is wrong with Spock:

McCoy: Oh, captain. Got a minute? It's Spock. Have you noticed anything strange about him?

Kirk: No, nothing in particular. Why ?

McCoy: Well, it's nothing I can pinpoint without an examination, but he's become increasingly restive. If he were not a Vulcan, I'd almost say nervous. And for another thing, he's avoiding food. I checked and he hasn't eaten at all in three days.

Kirk: That just sounds like Mister Spock in one of his contemplative phases.

Kirk doesn’t notice anything wrong with Spock, and initially dismisses McCoy’s concern, but McCoy immediately picked up on Spock’s mental turmoil. Despite his cantankerousness, McCoy not only cares about Spock but goes out of his way to look out for his mental state. Part of it might be because he’s his doctor, but how many doctors go so far as to monitor someone’s eating habits because they notice that person’s suddenly being fidgety? On Spock’s end, when it comes time for him to beam down to Vulcan to complete his marriage ceremony, he specifically asks for McCoy to be there:

Spock: By tradition, the male is accompanied by his closest friends.

Kirk: Thank you, Mister Spock.

Spock: I also request McCoy accompany me.

McCoy: I shall be honoured, sir.

One episode I find extremely fascinating in terms of McCoy/Spock moments is “Mirror, Mirror.” In this famous episode, half of the Enterprise crew get transported into an alternate universe dubbed The Mirror Verse, in which evil versions of the characters exist and terrorize space as a fearsome military force. McCoy is part of the team that gets transported in the Mirror Verse, while Spock stays in their regular universe. Mirror Spock immediately realizes that half of the crew, including Kirk and McCoy, are acting strangely. When he corners Kirk to question him, he does so by threatening McCoy: “I shall not waste time with you. You’re too inflexible, too disciplined, once you’ve made up your mind. But Doctor McCoy has a plenitude of human weaknesses, sentimental, soft. You may not tell me what I want to know, but he will.” This Spock seems to have a intimate knowledge of McCoy’s mind.  When the party decides to attack Mirror Spock, he fights all of them except for Uhura and McCoy, who he simply pushes out of harm’s way.

When Mirror Spock gets hurt as the crew is trying to escape back to their own universe, McCoy is suddenly unable to leave his side. Kirk allows him to stay to nurse Spock back to health, and McCoy risks almost staying in the Mirror Verse forever for him. When Mirror Spock awakes, he backs McCoy into a wall and initiates a forced mind meld onto the doctor. The next scene has Mirror Spock holding a disoriented McCoy up and bringing him back to his crew; he now understands what is happening and he wants his regular crew back, and thus he allows Kirk and company to make the switch back to their own universe.

Other Star Trek properties have gone more in depth on how a forced mind meld can be extremely traumatizing on the person receiving it. Star Trek: Enterprise has an entire story arc dedicated to the Vulcan T’Pol trying to heal from a forced mind meld. Unfortunately, because the nature of TOS episodes were episodic, we never got the chance to explore the emotional fallout of McCoy’s forced mind meld and how that might have affected his relationship with Spock. The franchise also never went in depth on Mirror McCoy outside of what Mirror Spock speaks of him, since Mirror McCoy died of xenopolycythemia in 2269.

Closing the list of evidence of Spock and McCoy’s affections towards each other are the Star Trek movies “The Wrath of Khan” and “The Search for Spock.” Towards the end of Wrath of Khan, Spock sacrifices himself to save The Enterprise in one of the franchises most heart-wrenching scenes. Moments before his sacrifice, he knocks McCoy unconscious, touches his face and whispers “remember.” What happened in this scene was that Spock, knowing he was about to die, transferred his Katra to McCoy. The katra being the Vulcan equivalent of a soul. This speaks to the amount of trust that Spock has in McCoy. For someone who keeps most of his emotions under a tight lid, it’s a huge gesture to entrust another with the essence of their entire being. The next movie, The Search for Spock, is a journey as the Enterprise crew fight to return to Vulcan so they can reunite Spock with his body. When they finally arrive, the Vulcans warn McCoy that the process is extremely dangerous and could even result in his death. McCoy calmly replies that he “chooses the danger.” He cannot fathom living his life without Spock.

McCoy: (Speaking to Spock) I'm going to tell you something that I... I never thought I'd hear myself say...But it seems I've missed you. I don't know if I could stand to lose you again.

So in conclusion, Spock and McCoy have a rich and complex relationship that is much more than simply just “they dislike each other because they bicker a lot.” Their bickering is more akin to that of an old married couple. There are plenty of examples not even included in this post of how deeply they care for each other. Despite their ideological differences, they balance each other out quite nicely. McCoy is finely attuned to Spock’s emotions, arguably better than anyone else on the ship. Spock in turn is protective and gentle with McCoy. Once you stop looking at their interactions solely on the surface level, you’ll be able to see the tenderness and years of love and friendship between them. This is why I think Spock/McCoy is one of the most underrated and misunderstood relationships of TOS. Don’t let the constant arguing fool you into believing these two dummies don’t adore each other.

Shout-out to Tempest for their extremely lengthy ship manifesto on Spones called “Spiced Peaches,” which goes even more in depth on why Spones is a great couple. Using their manifesto as a reference was key to remembering Spock/McCoy moments. Also shout-out to the site chakoteya for having full transcripts of TOS episodes, so I could easily find quotes for this. If you’ve come this far, thanks for reading!