#i cant ship either of these 2 with anyone else?? its weird to me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

demadogs · 2 years

Note

There’s this one blog on here that kinda weirds me out because they are so hyper deadest on shipping Foah together. Like whenever they write normal Byler posts, it’s so beautiful! But then, everything else idk. And I know a lot of us joke about Noah wanting to kiss Finn or vice versa but this blog gives off weird vibes because they seem to genuinely want Finn and Noah to date in real life. They also seem to make a lot of assumptions about their feelings for each other just because of their chemistry. And I don’t know how serious this blog is about it but it gives me Larry shipper vibes. Or like the Fack conspiracy all over again, which hurt Finn and Jack’s friendship at the time

oh my god im glad you brought this up i know exactly who youre talking about. every time i make a post telling people not to ship real people it was bc of that blog in particular. i have them blocked so im not afraid to talk about them. we’ve made jokes and memes about noah being the biggest byler shipper and wanting to kiss finn for byler and theyre mostly pretty harmless but this blog is just something else.

youre right, they make so many assumptions. it pisses me off and it does completely give me larry vibes. they talk as if they know finn and noah personally and theyre friends with them and have seen them interact. or like theyre an out couple like natalia and charlie. they usually respond to anons who call them out on it with something like “i dont ship foah, i just observe their interactions and anyone can see that they are crushing on each other”. that bothers me so much. like observe what the 5 minute press interviews?? you dont fucking know them. save your analyses for things that have been intentionally written and mapped out for FICTIONAL media, not two kid actors just being themselves. and then they’ll try to call the anons homophobic by being like “whys it such a big deal for noah to have a little crush on him??”, still fully talking as if its public knowledge and we’re the bad guy like oh my god how are you not understanding the issue here.

ive also noticed that they ignore anybody who tells them that finn has a gf. they just wont answer the anon (i know bc i have sent one) or ignore any replies about it. they live in this weird bubble where they choose to believe these real people are dating. and like ok i cant stop you from thinking theyd be cute together, theres nothing wrong with that, what makes it problematic is trying to read into their interactions and expressions and publicly suspect their relationship and sexualities on the internet. and again, they always try to be like “theres no harm in it im not directly @ ing finn or noah” but this is the internet. anybody can screenshot anything and put it anywhere. there is always a chance that either of them could see their posts and it could be so bad if they did. i dont think theyve ever once considered what it could be like to be finn or noah and see this.

like yes, there is a chance they’d just laugh about how ridiculous it is and move on but what if one of them actually was questioning their sexuality and then they saw some random person on the internet reading into it like this??? that would be so fucking hard. jack came out as bi after people were shipping him and finn so much. i cant imagine how anxiety provoking it would be to see what people were saying about him and finn while being in the closet. it gives ME anxiety on their behalf!! i hope so bad theyre blissfully unaware of this.

one anon told them that theyre using foah as a coping mechanism after byler didnt work out how they wanted in s4 and theyre so right. before vol 2 came out i saw maybe two posts from them in the byler tag about it that kinda weirded me out but after volume two they just turned into a foah blog instead of byler. they literally had byler in their url before and then they changed it to foah for fucks sake. and they still have the nerve to claim they dont ship them and what theyre doing is completely fine and just “observation”.

also i was looking at their blog once and they mentioned that they were 31 years old…. look it is not weird to ship byler at any age. i have personally as a 22 year old been told that its weird for me to ship byler and analyze these fictional characters and i completely disagree with that. theres nothing weird about shipping characters at any age even if the characters are kids (as long as youre not nasty about it) but real people??? god i would have been SO relieved if this person was like 15. i would not have gone as hard on them as i am right now if they were a kid because i would assume they would grow and eventually realize that its weird and invasive. i mean i remember reading stupid fanfics about youtubers when i was 14 but i grew and matured and realized how insane that is and no longer had any interest in reading into real peoples love lives. but i cannot excuse any adult shipping them like this.

god this ended up being so long i just had a lot to say. moral of the story: if actors have great chemistry on screen together it just means theyre good at their job, it doesnt mean theyre dating or crushing on each other in real life.

#this is one of the reasons i rarely am as invested in theorizing and analyzing a ship from a movie or show #theres always someone whos weird about it and wants the actors to get together #shipping book characters is so much more peacful they just exist in my head #byler #stranger things #man i really went off didnt i this is long as hell #eden answers

41 notes · View notes

redxblueihateloveyou · 3 years

Note

Hey i really love your blog!!! I just plucked the courage to actually send u an ask fhdjhd but GOSH i love your video edits and your gifs and your meta article posts, you're so articulate and you can explain/describe moments in a way that makes me go "oh wow, i cant believe i haven't seen it that way before!!" Haha ANYWAYS i'm just here to say that i completely agree with what all u said, Free creators might do a lil fanservice here and there for the 25 ships that exists within the fandom's circle, but rinharu's storyline is clearly the most romantic one! And i'd argue it's the one closest to being canon esp after part 1, i mean the fact that they put such an explosive emotional outburst right at the end of the second to the last movie means a lot. It's like reinforcing the fact that this series has always been about them, and everything that has happened only happened either because they met or they grew appart and miss eachother. I kinda feel like maybe.. juust maayyybe there's a chance KA wants to make the ship canon, since it's the last movie and they want to end it on a highnote maybe (bcs honestly i think the only reason they've been holding back is purely bcs of the merch sales, since they don't have a problem showing a wholesome lesbian love story in kobayashi maid dragon) butt i could be wrong, maybe i'm just overly optimistic and delusional, they could somehow ruin it and give an ending that panders to all the ships again 😅🥲, but at least there's a clear-cut guarantee that part 2 would dedicate a large portion of it fixing rin and haru's fight!!! Oohh how can i wait another 6 months now!!😭😭 (sorry for the long ask btw!! 🙏🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️)

OMG thank you so so much!! For watching my vids too! ❤️❤️❤️ It really means a lot to me! Ahhhh wow, thats the longest ask I've ever recieved! 😍 I'm trying to explain myself so hard lol I'm glad its appreciated, bc sometimes I'm like "I don't fucking know how to say this" xD

Well, you know me, I only care for one ship, which is the only one with confirmed info that they're both actually gay and have mutual feelings for each other. There are some other ships in free! I'm fine with (those do not include Rin or Haru in them xD), but I just mostly don't care, bc after reading all the stuff, you can see that in some of those to one the other one is actually like his second option, which I just do not like. Others I just don't even see, bc again to me who witnessed great close male friendships and having two sisters who I'm very close to, I just do not see anything romantic in that.

It's not just Free! tbh, it's like any sports anime these days. They see two guys walking together, it's a ship. And like no one cares if they're just bros. Like I'd get i they did some fanservice fanservice, but like I never saw anyone in Free! crossing the line the way rinharu do. I can without thinking much name you 10 rh moments that no matter how hard you think can't be explain as being bros, but can't name one when it comes to others. I just find some ppl shipping everyone with everyone weird sometimes. It's like western fans see like some eastern actors or singers slap each other ass lovingly and they're like "oh they're fucking" I'm like "yeah, ofc all 500 of them, you're absolutely right". And Free! doesn't do anything even like that, I just do not get sometimes like what moment even brought on some ships. I'm genuinely confused. Albert and Haru? You fucking fell from a sakura tree or smth? I'm...

I'm especially confused when it comes to guys, whose character type is who I call "I only want this one and if I can't have it, then I'm ok" xD. It just always surprised me, when they try to pair up them with someone else, it's like a complete ooc.

I'm also not into this whole "well, if there are gays in this anime, than everyone there is gay". I'm like... huh. It's like with KNB and MDZS I had same feeling. It's like you have already couples there who are canon/borderline canon, why do you need another 10 who don't even interact or just don't even go there? I'm always so confused in those situations. Or like wangxian is married and some are like "no, I actually don't like it, let me write a fic when they're with other ppl". Lan Zhan... being in love or having sex with someone else? Yeah, that's not Lan Zhan, dude, you're writing about someone else. Might as well change the name at this point.

But last time I went to twitter someone had a thread about how if they make s4 of Free! they should mainly explore there Momo's angst (and no, it wasn't a joke), so I'm already like, I'm just.. nothing will surprise me no more. But I'm forever gonna be confused.

Yeah, I eel you about "going there". I mean seeing part of it, it just kinda cemented my confusion, bc I do not get how it can be considered platonic. We were just discussing since yesterday with @freeseafirefly how I now even more perplexed and do not understand how they will resolve it without going into relationship territory. It's just our point here is that like... no one forced them to go there (I mean its not like this whole fandom has some wild expectations or anything already), we were waiting or our usual friendship and swimming and maybe tiny conflict about struggles of pro-careers and some usual rh implications (maybe all the rh gay in dramas as always). Not some pure fanfiction coming to life here haha.

Like why I'm laughing is bc I twice used in my "fics" bringing up him leaving Haru as a force to push the confession, bc there's no way if he adresses this it won't lead to this. And now we not only have this (bc Haru just basically layed it out there), but an actual scene of him playing on their feelings for each other and a literal image of Rin leaving and "taking Haru's heart with him" to the point when he's for the first time in his life openly crying on the ground. And it's not like this scene can be interpreted as anything else, the whole fandom talks same, bc the whole fight was just about them, what Haru said was just about them, there's a literal boom of his heart getting out of his chest, before he falls and now he's heartless.

So our question is like... why go there?

It's like some say that they might still resolve it with "they're special to each other" and swimming, but still like we already knew that, there was no reason to go that far is what I'm saying. And to think that it was planned since forever giving the clues is like... ???

The whole spoon theme also throw me on the loop because like, lets be honest, it's wedding themed. And that part of the interview about part 2 there also made me go...?????? Because I mean, huh?

This is just all in all very interesting turn of events to say the least. I do not see the point of all of this if its not what I think it is, esp after seeing tweets like "even I see a rh wedding and I'm mh T_T". It's just all very unsubtle, that's why we're confused.

Like who knows, maybe we'll really by some magic turn of events get lucky and they really decided that since its the ending, it's okay to go for it. But I also don't wanna to hype myself much, I'm already really happy with it, just bc again, this scene already proves all of my points.

And yeah, I'm sure they'll pander to everyone, bc it's the end and etc and we have to handle everything on the good note and there's a whole line of ppl who's obsessed with us, esp with Haru xD, but like bromance pandering and romance pandering are different things, you know *wiggles eyebrows* and u know who always gets the second one.

#answered #a-girl-with-a-ponytail #rinharu #harurin #free! the final stroke #free!#free #rin matsuoka #haruka nanase

36 notes · View notes

arllenn · 3 years

Text

image des: I really loved the fact that your brought their past into the light, that you made them actually effected and reflected on it. So often I just see stories focusing on their relationship with the "new" characters (Caesar, Luminous, Johann, The Gen fam) so following that line of thought.

Can I request a flashback scene? Like when we get requested to make it snow (at the beginning of the game) the group of friends reaction to it snowing makes you reflected on your past. In which a fluffy meeting/promise happens between Z, Renata and you. Or even any fluff you can think of between the three? It can be when they were kids or the age they were at during the game.

Admittedly I would love it if you can really focus on Z and the Character interaction/relationship because we all know he cares for Renata; they have that slacker x mother hen childhood friend vibe going on. But the idea that Z and you are ACTUALLY close (it just LOOKS like your friends with Renata and only friendly acquaintances with Z from the outside) makes me happy and bittersweet.

Sorry this got so long!

Tags for this chapter: fluff, hurt no comfort, bittersweetness, pure angst at first tho Tw: mentions of death and cannon typical violence, puke, death Time setting: pre japan like imagine if the mc got an adjustment period at cassell before they got shipped off to dragon war

You smiled happy to be of help to the friends who were separating today. Their cheerful giggles and cries of happiness as they raved over being able to leave on a snowy day just like the one from when they had met made your insides bubble with warmth and nostalgia. Z, Renata and you had been the same once..... before, before Herzog had...

You shake your head, now isn't the time for this. You wring your wrists, it's a habit you picked up from Z, though you two do it for different reasons. You feel a bit light headed, your knees are weak, it's so weird to see snow and not see your beloved friends among it. It just felt wrong to not feel their warmth around you in this cold tempature. The others giggling is getting too loud, it's beggining to ring in your ears and bounce around in your head at the same time as the memories of Renata and Z pour out of your head and spill in front of your eyes. You stiffly walk over to Claudia, left foot, left hand, right foot, right hand. Back and forth back and forth. You want to leave, but it’d feel wrong just going without checking with her.

“We met and departed on a snowy day.” She sounds so happy and while you’re glad that you were able to help them you also can’t help but feel cloying jealousy at the fact that this trio, Claudia, Susu and Leah get to be together, to meet and depart on snowy days filled with joy, while you can’t. You want to be able to see Z and Renata, you want to be able to tease them while jumping for joy and promising to stay in contact. You want to be able to send them off with a smile on your face and a promise to be well.

But you can’t.

And that’s it.

There’s no going back and searching, there’s no making up after an argument, there’s just nothing. Renata is dead Z is dead everyone is dead! And you can’t do anything about it.

Staggering away you start walking towards one of the benches in the courtyard that face the library. To say that you collapse on it would be an understatement. It’s like all the bones in your body liquified then disappeared at that moment. You clench at the snow on the bench, using the all too familiar feeling of it to guide you through your memories. The day you arrived at the orphanage, the first time you met Renata, Z and you arguing over who would get to hold which of Renata’s hands, the day Vera had arrived, so small and only a year old. You remembered her small finger curling around your own while Z helped you readjust how you held her.

Just Renata, Z and you.

But now it’s just you. You clench at your throat, clawing at it as if that’ll destroy the lump forming in it. You bring your knees up to meet with your chest. Burying your head in your arms. It hurts, you want to see them. At this point you’d even take Anton and Khorkina’s belittling of you or even Ivan and Sherkman failing horribly to hide the fact that they were dating over anything else that could possibly occur right now.

Rubbing your face on your knees you try to get rid of the few silent tears that have begun to spill. It doesn’t work, in fact it just makes everything so, so much worse. Memories of your childhood fly by, you’re loosing your grip on reality you know that. You don’t want to do it here. Not on a bench where anyone can see, if you’re completely honest you don’t want to confront them at all. But that isn’t an option, it’s never going to be an option for you, because you’re trying so hard to push them down and stamp them out right now. And it’s not working.

One of the wandering vending machines come up to you, clawed arm holding something in it. You can't see it at all, your line of sight only contains your legs after all, but you can hear the distinctive beeps of the machine, the whirring of its mechanical organs that allow it to move. You can feel the jagged edges of a wrapper lightly scratching at your leg through your uniform. The robot beeps twice shoving the snack into your leg once again before dropping it and skittering off. Lifting your head up you stared down at the snack you had been left with. Maybe the world really does hate you. Maybe you deserve to constantly have your mind ripped at and heart torn apart, because laying there in front of you is a cookie a chocolate chip one at that. The second your eyes land on the bubbly font that spells out chocolate you cant help but watch in horror as Vera falls in front of you, mere feet away, body still warm as she hits the snow, dead. You feel the bile rise in your throat, it isn't something that you can just swallow down either. Hand clapped over your mouth you stand, getting ready to run.

-----------------------------

You have no idea how you've made it back to your dorm room without puking on the way here, but now you're sitting over your toilet dry heaving into it. You stare down at the item that made you like this the choco- you spit into the toilet. Cookie, you'll just refer to it as a cookie. You consider tearing off the top half of the wrapper but then the smell of the cookie and the chocolate might just tip you over the edge. Instead you settle for smacking it away from you. In some small way it makes you feel better.

You hate that Herzog has ruined this for you. You hate that you can’t even see the word chocolate without feeling your insides churn, you hate that you can’t see snow without seeing your friends bloodied corpses staring back at you, eyes glassy and unfocused. Cookies were the first dessert that you had ever tasted and the last one. You remember the day you had first tried to bake them.

That day Z had let you in his room, Renata was sick, and neither of you were allowed to be around her as per Herzogs orders. With the knowledge that you have now you think you understand why you weren’t allowed to see her back then. Rather than actually being ill Renata was probably suffering from the side effects of the incomplete evolution pills. But either way natural disease or not it had been just you and Z. Sitting side by side on his bed, you laying with your torso hanging off his bed partially, practically upside down, and him crisscross leaned up against the wall that his bed bordered, a hand close enough to your leg to catch you if you started to slip. You two had been mindlessly talking, reading some book that you’ve forgotten the name of now, alternating turns each chapter. When you had gotten to a part where the main character was making cookies for their friend as a get well gift.

“Hey Z, have you ever had a cookie? I mean I’ve heard of them but I’ve never even seen one.”

“I can’t say that I have,” he yawned, “I’m not a big fan of sugar in general. That combined with the fact that the orphanage doesn’t even get the ingredients for them makes it obvious that I’d never even have the chance to try them, same as you.”

“That’s too bad, based on the description I think they’d be pretty good. You think Renata has ever had one?”

“I’m not her, I wouldn’t know.”

“I mean fair enough, but I kinda expected that you would, you guys spend forever having those late night talks after you send me to bed.”

You haul yourself up and spin on your ass so that you’re looking him in the eye, “Speaking of~, I won’t allow you to marry my daughter young man!” You cross your arms in an ‘X’ in front of you shaking your head. “Absolutely not don’t think I’ll allow anything of the sort!!”

Snorting he had pushed on your forehead with his finger until you were laying down the same as before and used his foot to roll you away from him. “2/10, If you’re going to give me a shovel talk then you should at least be intimidating, 1, and 2 you should do it in front of Renata so that you can embarrass her, who just gives that kinda talk straight to the supposed,” he raised his hands and gave out finger quotations “boyfriend?”

“Is that back talk I hear sonny? Don’t make me get up there!”

”Yeah because you haven’t already.” You can’t see him from your position but you can hear the smile on his voice. An accomplishment if you’ve ever seen one! You mean the stoic eternally tired Z was snorting and smiling because of what you said! You always loved times like this, when you would manage to break through his exterior and draw out a reaction, (preferably positive!!), out of him. Tapping his knee you grip onto his leg to pull yourself up once more, you can see him contemplating rolling you off the bed, thankfully he chooses peace for once.

”No okay but dead seriously, let’s go make cookies for Renata. We just got the shipments a little while ago, there’s got to be some of the stuff we need in there! We’ll just ask Herzog,”

“Or steal”

“Yes, or steal, come on it’ll be great!”

“Normally Renata would be here to stop you, which I am always grateful for since it means that I don’t have to be the one to talk you out of these things,”

You snap your fingers, “Speed it up Z, do I have a partner or am I gonna have to start running before you catch me?”

He claps a hand over your mouth which you look down at “Don’t you dare lick me,” is what he says in response to your stares. “As I was saying before someone cut me off,” if gives you a pointed stare, “Normally Renata would be here to be the voice of reason, however since she’s ‘sick’ and I don’t want to have her on my neck about you getting in trouble later here are my words of caution,” He takes his hand off your mouth and pats slaps your cheek twice before bringing the tips of his fingers in between the book page that you had been on and the next, folding it over and closing it. “Don’t, and if you do don’t get caught.”

It was your turn to snort, “What the heck, you suggested stealing in the first place!” You laughed. He shrugged his shoulders and set the book down on his bedside table getting up off the bed and bringing his arms above his head to stretch.

”I never said that we weren’t going to steal if that’s what you decide to do I simply offered you a word of advice about you stealing alone.

”AWWWW Z I knew there was a reason I put up with you!” You cried jumping up off the bed and attempting to latch onto his back,

He turned to face you swatting your hands away, muttering about you being “too big for him to carry like that anymore”

“What was that!?”

He pinched your cheek with one hand and used the other to ruffle your hair in a way that you knew wasn’t meant to be affectionate but instead to mess it up. “Look at how big the babies gotten! It can walk and talk now! Go ahead say ‘papa’ again!” You knew that you could never win against Z in a fight, all attempts left you on the floor with him sitting on you, or you hiding behind Renata and you exercising your lying and puppy dog eyes abilities. But boy oh boy did Z have a way of activating your Cain instinct and making you want to slap the shit out of him (affectionately of course). You heaved out a long suffering groan, and pulled Z’s hands off of you. You walked over to where his dresser was and sucked your teeth as you stared at your reflection. You tried your best to undo his damage to your hair, but it was a lost cause, hanging your head you turned to him with what you hoped was a horrifying, knee shaking, earth quaking, chicken baking, glare.

“This is why you’re an orphan.”

“Fair enough.” He said with a shrug before motioning towards the door, are we leaving now or what.”

“I’m coming, we’re going.” You said waving your hand at him in a shooing motion.

The minute you stepped outside it had been like you were ass blasted into one of the shipment containers mega freezers. You rubbed at your arms, lamenting the fact that you lived on a hunk of ice in the middle of a polar bears ass cheeks. “Okaaay so,” you clapped your hands together, “Do we know where Herzog is?” Z yawned and shook his head no from beside you. “Alright thank you for your participation! Gold star! I’ll go ask Anton, you stay here. And don’t fall asleep!” You ran off to go find Anton ignoring Z’s comment about you acting like a stray dog.

Heaving you clutched at the toilet, sobbing over the loss of your friends. You couldn’t even think of the times back then as being over, you just can’t.

No, that’s not right, you know they’re over, you know those peaceful days of snow and teasing are over. And yet you still long for them, you want to feel Z’s hands in your hair once more, want to feel the thrill of catching him off guard and running to hide behind Renata. You want back the times that you had spent, absorbed in watching Vera as she took her first steps, your young self amazed that anyone could ever be so small. You miss those moments when you seriously contemplated smashing Antons face into the ice under your feet, missed the random times when Ivan would pull you away to look at something cool that he had found. You just missed being homeyou miss the safe feeling that you had been provided with daily back then. Ignorance truly is bliss you suppose. If you had survived not knowing about what Herzog had done, if you survived thinking that all of this was just some randoms attack on you and your family would you have been happier? It doesn’t matter now. What’s done is done.

You dry heave and spit into the toilet, bile rising in your throat but not to the point in which it would spill past your lips. Your vision is blurry from the tears and your head throbs with the pain of the pressure your tears are both building up and releasing. “I wanna go home…” you mumble slowly laying yourself down on the floor, hands clutched into your hair, fingers threading themselves in with the strands and pulling at them like a tide. You would yank at your hair then let it all fall out of your grip, massaging your scalp slightly, and then yanking at it again. You continued in this way as the blurry memory of that day played in front of you. Anton being no help, Khorkina doing her best to goad you into punching her, Ivan being somewhere that you swear was unreasonably high up. Eventually finding Herzog and asking him, him granting you permission as long as you cleaned up after yourselves, running back to Z with the good news.

“Z! Z! Listen to this!” He looked up at you from his spot on the stairs, clearly bored out of his mind, but hey at least he hadn’t fallen asleep like you asked!

He made a twirling motion with his hand “What is it?”

You placed your hands on your hips and grinned, “Herzog says we can use the stuff in the kitchen as long as we clean up afterwards!” You gave an overzealous thumbs up afterwards to make your point even clearer.

“That’s great!” He said all too sarcastically. Getting up he put both hands on your shoulders resting all of his weight on them before finally standing up straight shushing you and your whining.

It hurry you so much to know that everyone is gone. It hurts to know that you’ll never get that chance to just see them again, to hear their voices, catch a glimpse of them on the street. Instead they’re all dead and there’s nothing that you can do about it. You had watched everyone die, you had seen their eyes glaze over and go out of focus. You had seen how their blood stained the pure white snow a bright and somber red. You had run past them as you registered them as dead, praying to nothing but everything at the same time that at least one of them would live. That you would get to hold at least one of them in your arms as you two promised to stay with each other. But you didn’t get that. Instead you got to watch as Renata faded into the distance, your last hope, you got to claw through icy waters, pleading your legs to move, to allow you to save your dearest friend….

”Z, Z, Z! Help me I have no idea why the egg keeps cracking like that!”

“Maybe it’s cracking like that because you keep squeezing them until they explode.”

“Don’t use that tone of voice with me young man! I’ll have you know that Dr.Herzog says that I’ve made great progress in my home economics studies.” You proudly bumped your chest with your fist only to look down and see your uniform covered in egg goop. Z snickered before handing you a rag and motioning for you to hand him the bowl and the eggs. You slid it over to him with your elbow and focused on cleaning your hands and uniform up.

”Here,” he held up one of the eggs,”I’ll show you how to crack an egg, so that you don't end up wasting all of them.” He hit it lightly on the edge of the bowl, holding both ends of the egg with his fingers and pulling his palm so that the egg slowly slipped out of the shell before proceeding to throw the shell somewhere off to the side of him. He pushed the bowl back towards you with a smug look on his face. "You get it now?"

"Yep, yep, yep," you waved your hand at him dismissively before turning back to the book. "Okay so now we mix wet ingredients and dry, then we add in the chocolate." Getting the chocolate for the recipe had been the hardest part. With how rare chocolate is at the orphanage and the fact that you weren't allowed into your room because of how sick Renata was it had been hard to find any. Eventually after bribing Z and way too much effort on your part, you had ended up on Z's shoulders searching through the backs of the older and dustier cabinets, in one of which you had found a chocolate bar that was a week off from its expiration date. Not the best but it could've been 10 times worse you suppose. Z pushed the chocolate towards you with this hand before resting his head on his hand.

"So how much longer do we have? It's getting late." Z stifled a yawn.

You glanced at the book and back down at the cookie batter that you were currently scooping out and onto the baking sheet. They didn't hold their shape as well as the book described them as being able to but you supposed that it was just a matter of reality vs. idealized fiction. "Um I don't know. The book says that they need 25 minutes to bake properly and who knows how long its going to take to clean this all up."

"Well good luck with that." He said slapping his hand down on the table, turning around on his stool, and standing up.

Even if it was just the memory of the sound, the slapping of Z's hand on the table sent a wave of nausea scorching through your body. Everything was a blur, reality, what you were really seeing, cold white tile and the rug in front of the shower were blending together with the cold white of snow, the rug that was in you and Renata's cabin. You felt hands on your face, were they from the memory of Renata checking your temperature or were they your own? Your vision was swimming, you were underwater, you were lying on the bathroom floor. You were drowning, you're lying on the bathroom floor. You're dying, you can't see.

You clamored up in a haze, you have to run! You have to get to Renata and Vera and Anton and and and and! And you slam into a desk that was out in the middle of Hezog's lab. Z is right there, Renata is right there, Vera is right there! All you need to do is reach out a little further and you'll be there! You'll be able to save them! You finally latch onto Z's uniform begging him not to go, begging him to stay with you, because if you go alone then everyone will die. "PLEASE Z!" You yell out. "I need you, I need you, I need you, everyone's dying, dead, dying dead, dying, dead, I can't save them! PLEASE!" And then the Z you're holding onto collapses, leaving nothing but a pile of clothes behind. His uniform lies bloodied in your hands. Renata lies bloodied in your hands. Anton lies just out of reach, dead. "Come back, please." You clutch onto Z's uniform harder. The tears don't falter as you trace your hands along the sleeves of the uniform. "The sleeves are too short you should get Herzog to make you a new one." You chuckle fondly. only...

Only...

Only the uniform has too many mistakes for it to have ever been Z's, theres too big a difference in size. It doesn't smell the same. It's not his... it's yours. You're not at the orphanage, you're in your dorm at Cassel. You're sitting on hardwood floors right now, not the powdery snowfall of home. Its warm, not cold, theres no dead bodies, only you and the mess that you made when you stormed through here earlier. You choke on a sob, tears coming down in even thicker streams, your headache had bloomed into a splendid migraine. You can barely see straight, but you know for sure that this isn't anywhere near, by or in the orphanage. And it can never be. The orphanage is gone now. Everyone's bodies are probably still lying on top of the snow, glassy eyes unfocused and unseeing, faces twisted in fear. Or maybe they've been charred to ashes, with nothing left to remember them by, their remains carried by the winds or at the bottom of the sea. You clutch your uniform tighter, biting down on it to muffle your screams and sobbing.

You have no idea how long you've been here. Your tears have faded now, only leaving the uncomfortable burning of the dried tear tracks in their memory. You don't stare at anything in particular, theres nothing left of your emotions, just the dull ache of apathy. Your vision is spotted with dancing black circles and lines. They look a bit like what you imagine TV static would look like but you really have no idea. Your conscious waves and ebbs like the tides from back home. You can't think of anything other than the feeling of the cloth clutched in your embrace right now. Sighing you bury your face in it, resigning yourself to a night on the floor.

#dragon raja #zero dragon raja #dragon raja mc #z dragon raja #Dragon raja herzog #fanfic #dragon raja fanfic #Writing #angst #hurt no comfort #fluff #I suck at tagging

34 notes · View notes

erizee · 3 years

Text

im still rewatching gotham bc its a great distraction from studying and if 17 year-old me was right about anything its that its Fun

but also. what the Fuck were the writers thinking sometimes lmaooo im not even going to list it all because thats too much work, these r just some Thoughts

please dont ask why im watching it if this bothers me this much, i dont have a good explanation. its just Fun to watch fucked up people do fucked up shit i guess. nothing makes sense ever and theres soo much shit to dissect & so many characters to follow. yea that probably explains it

also this embarassing. i do not want to have these many thoughts about this show again.

1. police brutality as a ~quirky feature of this whacky city~. im Pretty sure that never really stops but im only halfway through s1 rn and its a Very big thing there. im not even going to talk about this much more because im not nearly close to being an expert on it & i dont have as much of a clear analysis of it, its just fucked up tbh how they treat such a major issue in real life like a fictional thing that makes their fake city more ~spicy~

2. the way they talk about/use mental health & neurodivergency

Fuck lmao this bothers me so much more now than 4 years ago. in general its a whole mess & a lot of it is probably based on comic stuff eg arkham, but they really portray anyone in there as a child huh. its So disrespectful and gross

at some point they basically only have villains from arkham, which i know is also at least somewhat comic-based but that doesnt rly make it better? great villainization of neurodivergent people guys (& why tf did they send oswald to arkham??? theres literally no reason for that one)

dont even let me get started on ed. LITERALLY Thee worst portrayal of neurodivergency/mental illness ive EVER seen lmaoo. in s1 hes soo autistic coded its almost funny if it wasnt 90% based on bad stereotypes, he literally checks All the boxes. and then he randomly gets the fake fictional shock value version of DID?? i feel like that was the only thing the writers could think of that made sense why he'd ever kill people lol and its a) So lazy and b) Extremely bad for how DID is seen by people. i dont know how DID works exactly so i cant say anything abt if the way it started/his switching was at least somewhat accurate, but its just this typical "evil dangerous neurodivergent dude cant control himself/is just evil to his core because his ~mind is fucked up~" and its so frustrating. Yes hes one of my favourite characters still. Yes i still relate to him way too much. Yes the way hes written is Extremely harmful. those things can all be true

3. queerbaiting. only developed a ship because it was popular with the fans, then make them fight each other for the rest of the show, then have them be ~brothers~ at the end when ratings drop. typical And annoying.

4. this is less of a Real World Issue and more bad storytelling but plot & character consistency are practically nonexistant in this show lmao. this has been run to the ground years ago but its still so weird. the main thing is again ed for me since he was my favourite, but they really changed his entire personality whenever it was practical for the "plot". i could barely recognise him in s3 until i got used to it lmao he was sooo different. u Could make an argument for the riddler vs the ed personality but again thats bad rehashing of harmful stereotypes & Also doesnt fix anything tbh. the only thing that was actually consistent (if im not forgetting sth) was oswald's character i think? he became less gross over time but that was all as far as i can remember. sneaky, manipulative, too emotional, loses everything because of either his mom or ed aka what he loves. he became less smart somehow after s1 which is weird but i guess s1 him would have taken over the country if they hadnt nerfed him. i honestly cant remember anyone else because last time after ca the middle of s2 i stopped paying attention to anything that wasnt ed or oswald but yea it was a whole mess

#gotham #whyyyyyy #i dont want to be thinking abt this #why does it take me so long to find sth to talk about for good shows but im endlessly entertained by bad ones.#i hate it.#god this show is a mess but its truly so easy to hyperfixate on #its perfect for distracting me from study anxiety

2 notes · View notes

familyagrestefanblog · 5 years

Text

My notes to Ezras and Veronikas blind-reaction video

I’ve watched this video like at least 3 times today because honestly, Ezra is comedy gold and a whole ass mood. Also I wanted to get as much information out of their reactions as possible and at the same time try to figure out what episode we are dealing with here. My guess is “Kwami Buster” what do you think?

But now for my notes. Get something to eat and drink I’ve got 4 whole pages ^^

Ezra just dead ass comfirmed Mark + Nathanael as canon, nice!

episode starts in a location we’ve already been in s1 but rarely and we havent discovered it much so my guess is this:

The only time an akuma attack took place in there was in “Mr. Pigeon” and it rarely came up in other episodes.

a “her” is possibly up to something

a “she” (It didnt seem to be the same person) has alot to speak in this episode but normally doesnt speal much -> Ezra; she kinda does -> Veronika

A character has an ongoing theme, it happenes over and over (progression in the season/s). They dont know wjere the creators will go with it but Ezra theorizes it’ll be a massive sacifice. ( I think they are talking about Marinette here, who will maybe see something like Adrien and Kagami together and gets sad over it again. Since she will give up her love for him in s3 finale I find this more than likely). Also Veronika said first she cant imagine it being super sad and then mentioned Marinette slightly with “Like, Ladybug’s...” but then cuts off and agrees with Ezra that “it could be very sad” because Ezra said that he thinks itll be a massive Sacrifice because the show doesnt shy away from real emotions/feeling, espacially love and passion.

something new came up that teaches us about the term all of season 3 has been dealing with. We havent seen it yet, but its setting up why “they” happen. (No idea on this one)

something completely different and exciting came up (They are MARELING!) “Its beautiful!” “This is gorgeous!”. Never done before and something slightly origin story like (My bets are that this is a continuation of Master Fus backstory in “The collector” and its done kinda in the way of his painting like flashback pics

A “him” is in it and they are very excited about it (could be younger Fu but it could be anyone, really)

The voice actor whos telling the tale (another reason why I think its Fus backstory) is gonnabe very very busy

the whole sequence is going on for a while

Huge responsibility for Marinette (also another reason for the Backstory. I think this would be the episode he will start actually making Marinette a guradian of the Miraculous and therefore trusts her with even more of his backstory and what happened in the past

Veronika feels for a character alot of other people start to feel for too. She calls the person “missunderstood” (I think its Natahlie)

One story line Ezra knows very little about came up next and Veronika wonders if it will come up again “at the end of recordings” (so the Finale) (I thinks its the storyline of what happened to Emilie)

Very funny Adrien and Plagg moment that has alot of Fanart already -> its cute

right afterwards something “very different” happened and Ezra was SHOOK AF

A “hat thing” came up several times in the whole episode. Its gonna need a voice actor, its new to the story but not a character per se. “Its like a significant character in another characters being” (wtf??)

Once again something “very different” happened and Ezra is delighted and shook part 2

“look at its/his mouth” followed immediatly by a little conversation about hawkmoth winning and that it becomes more and more possible by every passing episode

“Sweet Plagg” Plagg either being normally cute or adorable or hes sweet and sensitive in a bad situation (ITs so THE laTER ONE YALL!!!)

SOMETHING HAPPENED! Ezra was so fucking SHOOK PART 3 that they repeated his high pitched “WHAT???!!?!??!?!?” three times!

Veronika: “How can they do that though! :D”

Ezra: “NOOOOOO WAY!!!!! (°ロ°)

Veronika: “What are they gonna do? :D”

Ezra: “There he goes! D:”

She was smiling and so excited and he dead ass sat beside her this close to having a mental breakdown (like I said this glorious man was a whole ass mood this entire video)

It seems something so massive happened that Ezra yelled: “The series is over! How can we have a Series if THAT happened? We dont have a Series if THAT. JUST. HAPPENED!!!!”

The only thing massive enough to end the series is Hm getting the ultimate power in one way or another. (everything else from reveal to betrayal and death is just an obstical to overcome in the plot, but Hm getting the ultimate power is presented to us as instand game over!) And with the little context we got from them from just moments before it seems to actually fit?? WTF??? In the episode I’m trying to put together with the context here it seemes that through Kwami buster Hawkmoth has got both Plagg and Tikki and was able to power up through them without getting the ultimate power just yet because for that he needs the jewellery to channel the powers. So I guess now Hm would only need Lbs and Cns empty jewellery so he cant combine them and game over.

Both Veronika and Ezra are just seriously loosing it (but most of all him)

“look how giant it is!” “And much bigger!” implying that we say whatever they talk about smaller before (for some reason my mind immediatly went to the giant butterly Hawkmoth head in the “origins”)

They are confused about how something (important) works

Something is there that we have seen in another episode before (1 Episode? Not sure but it has to be something rarely seen) + they are confused by it

something hilarious happened

a new ship can be merged in this episode (Maybe Marinette and Adrien with other Miraculous’? Maybe this is where we’ll get Dragonbug and Snake Noir because at some point later in the episode they would have to get Tikki and Plagg back making DB and SN possible)

The puns (in english) are WILD

Someone is being very courageous

it seems to feel like a classic Ml episode but with so many new elements. Not something we’ve seen before and I believe them! :D)

Ezra screams Part 8 + “That thing is dangerous!”

“How are they gonna- (stop him/it/whatever?)” <- Veronika

“How are they gonna, THEY DONT HAVE A WAY!” <- Ezra

Ezra screams part 9

Ezra gets to do something in the episode and I dunno what

“Thats when that happpens??” -> Veronika

“He wants that!” -> Ezra

A character we have seen more of this season is in this episode too

they fucking CLAPPED saying “finally, yes!” but it seems to be about something commen because Veronika seems to do it every time she wrapps up an episode

Adriens fucking parfume ad on a bench and neither of them remeber the words (SHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME)

Hawkmoth moment + hilarious Hawky impression by Ezra saying “Ladybug and Cat Noir”

Hm and probably Lb and Cn are inside it/something

There is a weird noise but is has a purpose

a thing is “hUngry”

Ezra and Veronika a little shook part 10

“Thats so sad! :D” -> Veronika (I fucking love that woman xD)

“Dont do it! D:” -> Ezra concerned af

But “he” wont do it. Veronika and Ezra are relieved

Both doing Cataclysm impressions

Ezra being our very own Ladybug and being very passionate about her catchphrase lines (”Miraculous LadybuuuUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ )

THEY POUND IT! :D

He asks her if she knows a character near the end (she does) so I’m taking from that that there is an important new character coming up in future

huge episode for 3 characters

Ezra repeats, one plagg moment was adorable

SHOOK PART 11

“Thats a huge reveal!” <- Ezra. “Unless he takes it back or she refuses" (my bets are on Gabriel revealing himself to be Hawkmoth to Tomoe. The contract they made in the beginning of the season, their growing partnership and some of Tomoes words in “Ikari Gozen” make me highly suspicious for what the future holds. Her knowing him to be Hawkmoth and that their partnership turns out to be more twisted than we though wouldnt surprise me, if anthing i would be PUMPED for it!)

It’ll (probably)be a huge thing in s4

something happened that reminded Ezra of karate kid

someone is in a disguise and Veronika laughs

Cliffhanger that Ezra describs as “dark”

no classroom episode, no ther students. “This was like to the heart of the matter of the miraculous powers and hat they can do and finding out things that we have no idea they could do and it opens up the lens and shows you more of this world and how dark it CAN be!” <- Ezra

#Miraculous #Miraculous Ladybug #Ml leaks #Ml spoilers

134 notes · View notes

aenslem · 5 years

Text

Doctor Who Tag Game

Tagged by: @thirteenstardisfam thank youu and i am so sorry it is so super long lmao i did not mean too, but somehow ended up with it, and also i think i will make fandom hate me for some stuff about 11, but i love him! don’t you dare to think otherwise :’D

im tagging: @tennant @luke-skywalker @panlyra @stupidape @buffyrosenbergs @expelliarmus idk who of you whovians wanna do it out there feel free to say i tagged you and go on ;)

Favourite Doctor: still Ten, i love 12 and 13 almost as much, even if not harder atm, but if it comes to choosing 1 fav doctor then it’s always Ten, so far no one stepped higher for me :’D I loved his era, i loved so many episodes with him, his season arcs, his companions, his relationships with everyone, and this is the only Doctor whose regeneration was smooth for me, he was continuation of Ninth Doctor and it felt like that. I was not like ‘but he is so different in so many ways’ nope, never. Maybe it’s because companions were the same, everyone was still around which was great btw, and I fell in love with the show with Tenth Doctor, dare I say that I stopped watching back then when Matt Smitt became doctor? lmao, must be shock for some but yes, I dropped this show because of THAT lmao??now i laugh at my own self but yeah, i did. where’s everyone, why it feels so different? that was huge nope. Only years later I got back into it, thanks to amazing Michelle Gomez. Actually I was not even going to watch other doctors at that moment, but I watched episodes only with Missy, then i said well it’s not bad I like it and Missy and Twelve were?? OOOF LOVES OF MY LIFE FOR SURE because their relationship were so cool and of course i loved it, so i started a huge rewatch, the first since i dropped the show. Fell in love with Doctor/Master all over again, Ten was as amazing as I remembered, Nine was perfect and I love him too!!! and then... i got to s5... oh god, i was like, let’s give him a chance, what do i lose? but it still felt so weird, and the show was so different, and suddenly everyone else is so important but where are old characters? but i got into it because i have already seen some of 12′s episodes and i got used to the style?? i guess. and then River appeared, not because of her but around episode 5 or 6 i was into it already, not as much as i was before but anyway, maybe weeping angels helped because i loved them and it reminded me of Ten, i felt some kind of a connection to old doctor. I liked River with 10, i thought i will like her with 11 too... but alas, still felt like you know those boys who have never had sex but try to act like they know everything about it and hit on every moving thing and think they do it cool? :D i am sorry if i hurt someone’s feelings with it, but that’s how 11 was for me back then, and while I do understand river/11 it’s the least of all river ships for me, 11 is still the least fav doctor because of those feelings i had back then when i stopped watching, they are not rational i know that now but still feel them, but i love him now, and will protect that kid at all costs! i love ponds, i will kill if anyone says anything bad about Rory Williams! and Amy and Rory? quoting my favorite star trek couple? DUDE WE GO TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! and even if i was not into all river/11 relationship i loved the story, and of course i liked 12, but s8 still feels like what the hell for me, not because of the doctor but because they tried so hard to show clara as bossy, i mean, i liked her with 11 and then suddenly they turn her into some control freak, it was not so MUCH with 11... but i know now why they did it, so Missy’s words have an effect and all. but still, i love clara before and after s8 :’D s9 clara? i will kill for her too. it’s too long but idk :’D and actually, this shows that if you give it a chance even if you don’t like actor/actress at first - you might love the show ;) so stop acting like jodie is miscast honestly, i am ready to fight anyone for saying that :D say whatever you want about plot choices, but do not fucking act like it’s Jodie’s fault! actors are not responsible for show runner choices. She acts amazing with the material she has. anyway, 10 is my fav idiot!

Favourite Master: Missy, always was and always shall be. My favorite character in general in the show, no one tops my girl!

Favourite Sonic: honestly? i don’t really remember any sonic but 12′s glasses :D so... glasses. I mean, i don’t really care how it looks like, it does its job... most of the time lmao, but i liked those glasses and the thing with browser history was my fav :D

Favourite Companion: oh it’s soooo hard!!! either Donna or Bill. I can’t choose. but yeah, those are both with whom there were no ‘romantic’ relationship implied, i love friends more than couples. and I just loved 10 and Donna as a team and Bill and 12, i still wish they had more time. also Martha, the smartest companion lol she was amazing.

Favourite Story: anything involving The Master :D all episodes with them are my favs, but i can’t just pick one story, i still remember the first episode i watched back when it was airing and are you my mummy stuck in my head for the rest of my life giving me brrrr feeling, like it was not scary but somehow made me super uncomfortable? also vashta nerada?? duuuuude, you can’t just look at the shadow the same way. and ten/river together were really great, i mean, he did not know who is she, the mystery, i love shit like that?? yeesss!!!!! there are so many great ones. I don’t want to choose.

Favourite Soundtrack: that unreleased tiny melody when the master dies in the last of the time lords T--T and this is gallifrey and clara’s theme! those are my favs. and I also really like 11′s theme, kinda ready for adventures and doing some weird but funny shit :D

Dream Actor for next Doctor: ooooof OOOOF dude! you know what, usually it is one actor for 3 seasons, that’s how it was for the last 3 doctors, i want Jodie to break that rule and stay with us for 4th season as well, i just want to see how pissed off those haters will be lmao i really really think the entire timeless child thing will not feel the same with someone else yet, and i don’t think they will reveal much in 13th season, that’s HUGE thing, or they should make it so good and the next doctor... aaah i don’t want to feel that change again, like i did with 10 to 11, and felt with the every next doctor, but i overcome that shit and just give them a chance, it’s the doctor after all and im sure loving all of them now. not sure it can disappoint me even if most of plot choices in the season are ... weak. idk who, there are so many great actors but whoever i choose will not be as great as someone they choose, because they always somehow cast amazing people, but i agree with emily it’s time for a doctor of color! tho, they can’t go back to white male actor right now, i just can imagine how it will look like, with all the hate Jodie received and how people still whine about female doctor, it will look like they tried and decided to go back to white male doctors, one half will be happy but the other one will eat them alive! so yeah, i am pretty sure it’s not gonna be white man again yet lol

Dream Composer: idk

Dream Story: well, considering 13 is in jail now, i would love to see someone “we know” rescuing her, because honestly if they just showed me jack and left it like that, i will not accept it!!! but also since yaz will be the only one left with the doctor, since bradley and tosin leave the show, i hope we will have some yaz and doctor relationship development without anyone else, maybe jack could stay because i love him, but jack’s presence did not hurt doctor and rose relationship development back then, so it should not hurt now also. but if they bring someone new, at least don’t make it right away, let yaz and 13 have an adventure at least 1 episode, some talk and stuff. so when yaz leaves also... (and i kind of had that stupid feeling that yaz will die in the end, because somehow everything hints on that for me? idk maybe it’s because i rewatched and giffed orphan 55 today and vilma (?) telling yaz to run and stay alive kinda felt like something that hints on yaz’s future... and yaz is always going somewhere without thinking, to random alien ship, to save the doctor, she steps into trouble like a doctor hoping everything will somehow be ok, but im not even sure she hopes, it’s more like i am as good as her so i can do it, not in clara’s way when everything hinted she is like the doctor, because let’s be honest she was and even got her own tardis, but she thinks she is, but she is not, i think some day that might end bad for her... so when she also leaves i don’t want it be like well yeah, what’s next? i mean, i still miss Bill, that was like NOOOOOO with tears and screams for me, i loved Bill! and we had 2 seasons with yaz and i still don’t feel the same connection to any of the current companions atm, so i would like the show to make me love them more, i do love them, just not as much as those i still miss, but im sure defending any of them lmao i love them anyway. you know what i mean...

A Companion You’d like to see back: oh OH. we cant bring them back for entire season right? but doctor can meet Donna at some point, which will have no point lmao cos she doesn’t remember and it will only hurt doctor and i don’t see how her appearance will help any plot, it will be just fanservice cameo. But Bill is out there with Heather, they are powerful creatures now, i think it could somehow fit into the story, I want Bill back. But also, Clara is still one heartbeat away from death, she can be out there, and she has tardis. tiny cameos will be fine for me :D and Martha, but also Madam Vastra and Jenny, Kate and Osgood, where they are??? bring them back and it can make sense, their appearances. I mean, imagine someone from UNIT in s11, not unit itself but osgood??? it would feel so much different.

An Enemy/Alien/Creature you’d like to see again: weeping angels!!!! OOOF they were creepy, and i love them, like, DON’T BLINK!!! how can you not blink for so long? that is cool, i want them back. and also the most beautiful shots are always with angels so... :’D

If you could travel with one of the Doctors, which Doctor and why?: oooh, while 10 is my fav, and I totally would hit on 13 :D i will choose 12, 12 from season 10, because he was such a grandpa, no lovey dovey stuff, he would lecture me on thing i do, give me new info about something, we would explore shit together and he would be like a grandpa i never had. We would definitely have long discussions about stuff and have good laugh together and i would make references to movies and then we would watch those movies :D i would act like Bill lmao yess i want to travel with 12!!!

#text #doctor who #tag game #ooh for dream story i want doctors together #how could i forgot i always want doctors together :D

7 notes · View notes

smoliboops · 6 years

Text

so i woke up this morning (so apologies if i sound a bit off or groggy in this haha) but i awoke to a lot of posts discussing about “drama” and speciffically first saw @turquoisemagpie ‘s geniuinely curious post about the community’s status.

i’ll start off by saying 1) im also genuinely curious about all this. i care about this community and ive been in the tumblr one specifically for 4 years now, and this seems to be the first anomaly ive seen in my time here that hasn’t been one off but “underlying”.

2) im human, lol. i’ll be honest, ive never gotten involved with stuff like this (the only one i think would barely count was when the community was debating over anti’s portrayal back in december 2017). this is just what i think in as objective and analytical of a way i can place it, and it’s not wrong nor right. just my own thoughts. (also note, i have two exams tomorrow, so i probs wont be on here afterwards anyway cos i need to study else i die lol, but i just wanted to chime in like anyone else would)

ok first point- the drama is not shallow enough to solely revolved around the intro outro changing.

it is not the issue itself; rather it is the situation, or window that is giving us a bigger picture in the new, wierd mood that the community has been in for a while.

im human, but personally, in the large amount of time ive spent everyday scrolling thru the tag i have not legitamentely seen a post saying “oh i dont like that jack isnt doing the intro anymore im unsubscribing.” it doesnt seem logical to me that someone who dedicates themselves enough to the channel that they are a active member of the tumbtlr community, to throw all that away just for an intro.

what i have seen instead are 2 things:

1) usually when i scroll thru the tag and see a current hot topic, i try to scroll back up til i find the post that probably originally started it all. this, along with the first type ive seen in the tag, are people saying that “some people are unsubscribing cos of outro...how can they do that..they have to understand change is normal...people act like children sometimes...i cant believe it those people are not part of the community they should just leave...etc

2)the people i have seen saying “ah man i miss the intro and outro....i miss them it feels a little weird without them...i hope they dont go away forever i’d miss it”..etc

number 2 does not match with the people number 1 are talking about. unless i am wrong (i am human so if you have actually seen this on tumblr send me a link to the person’s blog or post) the people missing the outros have never said they would leave the community. Simply expressing a sentiment for something that has always been the norm that is now changing, that’s all it is for most people.

BUT, the misunderstanding/missalignment i see between 1 and 2, is that people in 2 is either being generalized/misslabeled/or lumped by others as the “leaving the community” group. and this can even apply to number 1, where some who genuine simplly want to say “the outro might be gone, but it’s ok to change” are grouped into the others saying “leave the community you kids dont belong here” and this is the window into the main problem i think in the community.

jack is changing. this is the happiest ive seen him be in 4 years and you have no idea how happy i am for him that he is choosing to take care of himself more and finding/discovering what he truly wants for himself, his style of commentary, the channel, and the community.

No one wants to get in the way of that. not 1, not 2, no one here wants to legit do that because we all so so deeply care about him. he brought us so much happiness, friendships, friggin several couples proposed in front of him over the years cause he indirectly helped them find love. we care about jack so much, that as a community we’re trying our best to give him the best atmosphere to change. but it’s a big community, so of course people have different ways of doing so.

we love him fiercely, so we either protect fiercely or we speak up fiercely. and then the whole tag is on fire. you’re on fire. you try pouring comforting pics on it oh no that was gasoline help-

people want to help jack and the channel/community through feedback; if something is felt to be wrong by a person, they’d want to let the captain know that something’s amiss and how/why it is and if they can fix it.

people want to help jack and the channel/community by protecting/managing it; if we dont want to sink the ship, we have to keep up and remember the duties as a member what we should be doing so that if we see a hurricane coming, we can deal with it the best without getting the ship damaged.

both are good, you can’t have one without the other. without proper management the ship will sink, but if there’s a solution outside of protocol it should be considered. if the new idea/solution/feedback is faulty enough that it would put us at even greater peril, the rules serve as a guide of judgement in doing what’s best for the ship.

no one side is right on its own. if there’s no way of feedback or communication to the captain, or anarchy is assumed among the members and the captain is overthrown, the ship will sink.

cooperation is key. nothing is black and white, its gray and our relationship with jack is a conversation.

agree or disagree, we need to not dismiss one in favor of ourself, we need to listen, be open, and use other’s ideas (whether good or bad, evil or rightous, selfish or selfless, or just plain neutral) in forming our own and vice versa, creating a cycle of healthy conversation rather than attacking or defending blindly.

and as well, the captain has had years of hard work, dedication, knowledge, and experience to get to his position. and ultimately it is Jack who is the one to decide how to run this ship. there can be members whose feedback is unjustified, or even hate-filled. there can be members who feel a one particular way is the right one over all else . but Jack is the one who chooses what to take into himself and the channel. does he think this feedback is valid? he’s open to taking it into consideration. does he disagree with it? that’s ok too, he still decides what he’ll take from it, good or bad, and move on.

experiencing things, toxic or healthy, we as individuals have the power to choose what to take in, not take in, and how we proceed with the information we take in. the actions of others have no rule over you, you rule over yourself. you choose what to take in and how. if we restrain ourselves/others, or protect ourselves/others, from this, then that right to choose is taken away before we even get a chance to choose. we just become isolated and very very, very alone.

tl;dr: TALK, FOR THE LOVE OF ANALOGIES AND GOD AND EVERYONE, JUST TALK CIVILLY AND NORMALLY WITH EACH OTHER. WE’RE ADULTS. JACK IS AN ADULT. CONVERSATE. NO ONE IS PROBLEMATIC AND NO ONE IS UNPROBLEMATIC. WE’RE ALL HUMAN, WE’RE ALL GRAY. WE ALL LOVE JACK WE ALL LOVE THIS COMMUNITY AND WE’RE ALL SO VERY GRAY AND SO SO SO COMPLEX AND HUMAN. SO PLEASE, P L E A S E

why dont you just talk to each other....

#jacksepticeye

30 notes · View notes

tumblunni · 6 years

Note

For the kingdom hearts asks: choose your top 4 questions. 😆

1. Where would have been your home world?

Maybe Halloween Town? Or one of the final fatasy crossover places.

2. What would be your starting keyblade?

I like Fenrir, I think it pulls off the ‘looks like a car key’ thing better than riku’s new keyblade in 3. Like its not just straight up a regular car key with no additional decorations, like how the regular keyblade isnt a regular key with no decorations. Just having some weird patterns and bandages on the thing makes it neater! Also kinda resembles the key to the temple of the ancients from orignal ff7.

Tho if i had to choose between only ones that were already starting keyblades in other games, I’d say i like Aqua’s one the best. Its neat with that weird lazery hollow key shape effect

3. How many allies would you have with you as you travel?

aALL OF THE FREMSDS

4. If in a party, what would be your main role (e.g. tank, healer, synthesizer, etc.)

combination tank/damage dealer. Runs into the front lines with zero strategy except smacking stuff and Protect Friemds

5. What would be your command list if you were a D-Link? Limit to 5 commands!

Oh man I actually dont really know how D-Links work cos BBS is one the games i never finished. But uhh probably defense and counterattack stuff?

6. What would be your fighting style?

oh uhh ok better to explain it here! I’d like to be a tanky punchyness, someone who maybe isnt exactly the strongest but they can just keep attacking and annoying the fuck out of the enemy forever. In a party i’d be based around drawing aggro and protecting my friends from attacks but also maybe have some trickstery counter atatcks that give me potential to deal some damage if i get lucky.

7. What would you prioritize? Power, Magic, or Speed?

LOL i always thought it was weird that the mobile game picked those as the three elements when the main trio of the game is clearly power, magic and DEFENSE. and theres loads of enemies who are defense specialists too! i’d be that!! I wanna just be like the annoying Large Body enemy. Big cuddly person who protect they friends to the point its gamebreaking, lol!

8. What would be your ability as a support medal? BONUS, state if it's a single-target or all-target attack, and your SP cost!

Oh man im not very good at the mobile game lol XD I might say a buff defense or lower enemy attack thing cos just those are most necessary to not die in that damn hard game. or if i could have anything even stuff that isnt already possible in the game, then i’d like to be a counterattack! something like if the enemy has buffed themselves you reverse it into debuffs, or you reflect their whole attack. but itd have to have an element of chance to it so maybe it only works if you sacrifice something else, or just on a random flip a coin thing?

9. If you could be partners with one character in the series, who would it be?

URSULA IS MY FAVOURITE DIDNEY

or from the original characters I WANT VEXEN TO BE MY NEW DAD

10. What KHX/KHUX union would you belong to?

in the game i picked the snake one cos i like snake

ive been playing for ages and i still know nothing about what the damn difference is or what the personalites are of any of the bosses

11. What is your favorite magic spell?

its been ages since i played the original games but i recall that i used thunder a lot cos i am bad at aiming, lol

12. Doublejump or glide?

GLIIIIIIIIIIDE

13. Cure or esuna?

cure lol! status effects dont happen often enough to make esuna a mainstay

14. What would be your dodging move?

the goofy kabuki theater dodge pose Quina does in ff9

15. What would you have forgotten in Castle Oblivion?

Probably some sort of dark shit like “your wish is granted to forget your childhood abuse but youre left not knowing who you are because that stuff shaped you from such a young age that its become an unremoveable part of your identity”

16. Would your nobody be just another creature? Or would they belong to the Organization?

*SLAMS FIST ON THE TABLE* WHY NOT BOTH

seriously im still SO mad that all the sentient nobodies look like boring people instead of cool creatures

CREATURE CREATURE CREATURE

17. What would your costume look like in Halloween Town?

oh does anyone remember that time i drew myself a ghostsona? yeah like that! fancy top hat and coattails spoopy~!

18. What sea-creature would you be in Atlantica?

Maybe that ‘sea bunny’ underwater slug species?

19. If you could have one dream eater with you in your travels, what would it be?

aaaa i havent played KHDDD yet but all of them look so cute and im excited to meet them and find out my favourites!

20. Would you want to travel with a heartless/nobody/unversed with you as a buddy?

YES. YES. YES.

seriously 90% of all my thoughts and posts on this series are just IMMA LOVV THE DARKNESS I WOULD GIVE MYSELF TO THE DARKNESS INSTANTLY TO HUG THESE BABS

21. What would you do if you had free time in a world and didn't have to fight?

HUG THE HEARTLESS

PLAY MINIGAMES

DRESS UP IN WEIRD KINGDOM HEARTS FASHION

SING KARAOKE WITH URSULA

22. In battle, do you prioritize speed or accuracy?

i have no depth perception lol, no accuracy in this house

23. What would be your command style? (2 max!)

i aint play BBS! i aint know! *le shrug*

24. What would be your keyblade transformation?

I aint play kh3 either!

25. What drive form would you use?

ANTI FORM cos i wanna be a COOL CREATURE seriously man FUCK THE LIGHT GIMME THE DARKNESS THE DARKNESS HAS LIL CUTE EYES

26. What would you mainly use flowmotion for?

I aint play KHDDD and also with my bad accuracy i would primarily use it for falling off buildings

27. Would you rely on cure magic, or items for healing?

when i played i was always more of a magicker healer. i feel like itd be the only spell that my khsona has on a mostly physical attack set

28. What would be your break time move?

*breakdancing softly* i aint play BBS dude, i dont kno dis shit

29. What are you better at? Ice cream beat, rumble racing, or fruitball?

it is amazing how much BBS i have not played

30. Would you know how to pilot a gummi ship?

NO i cant even ride a bike IRL lol

31. Would you use the darkness as a weapon?

YES but also NO i would use the darkness as a hugs i would just befriend a bunch of heartless like the dream eaters and cuddle them til they stop being evil

32. WILDCARD, ask me anything!

UHHHH go ahead guys!

#i did it alllll #summon-daze

2 notes · View notes

booksandchainmail · 6 years

Text

nanoha vivid liveblog: episode 9

We left off in the opening rounds of the competition, with Vivio and Miura slated to fight each other at some point.

The other belkan girls!

I think I remember them being friends

Soft music and slow-mo here, as we get our first look at sieglinde’s eyes

... which are entirely ordinary

huh, i was kinda expecting more heterochromia

… RIGHT SHE HAD A DUMB NICKNAME

THEY BOTH DID

look I know youre overdramatic teenagers but I promise you giving yourselves nicknames about how good you are at fighting doesn’t actually make you seem good at fighting

also, i like to imagine that victoria’s been trying to get people to call her victor for most of her life, and sieglinde is the only one who will. victoria gave her her own nickname in thanks, and sieglinde was so happy about having a friend to give her a nickname that she didn’t care about the theme

have you considered losing the waist long twintails?

awwwww

weirdly wholesome considering the subject matter

who’s this boss? Presumably one of the other competitors we’ve seen, and I’m guessing harry as the only one who runs a thing (as well as one of the only returning successful contestants)

please tell me she didn’t pick that nickname/title herself

theyre cute together

and sieglinde pulls her hood back on as soon as more people arrive

i guess i shouldn’t be surprised that the ojou and the delinquent dont get along

at least it looks like it runs both ways

i really do like this dynamic of harry and victoria constantly trying to fight, and meanwhile sieglinde’s just there in the background trying to calm down her friends

oh hey the last unintroduced girl from the op! presumably she’s a returning fighter considering she seems pretty familiar with the others

… I can’t tell if “violator restraints rule master” is one skill, two skills, her job, or her personality

would they be wrong?

let the fangirling commence!

oh gods shes trying to hide behind that popcorn

it is very much not working

i feel like this scene should be one of those draw the squad memes

also, these four are great together, more scenes with them please

I do like how in the returning champions we’re presented with three people who all hate each other, and then one person who they all like. it’s a good setup for comedy and shipping

awwww, even while being shy, she’s still nice to einhart

come to think of it, i wonder if she also has memories of belka, and if so does she recognize einhart

sdjklaghklfaghlj

those chains were completely ineffective i guess

i like to think that harry and victoria didnt break out immediately because they didnt want to hurt els’ feelings

gods

els is extremely indignant and harry is just having a good tiem

okay that’s cool, they edited the OP now that we’ve seen sieglinde with her hood down

how do these two know each other? I mean I’ll believe it, but I’m curious now.

so what were the fights we saw last episode?

I guess prelims for the qualifiers? Which explains how some people are seeded already

this tournament sure has a sense of the dramatic

she is actually a rule master school president

and brought her council with her i guess

OH THIS IS THE PERFECT MATCHUP

I mean, I would take harry fighting just about anyone, but this is an excellent clash of anime character archetypes

The fact that there is canonically Japanese immigration to midchilda is one of the weirdest things about this setting to me. I mean, Nanoha and Hayate just moving to another planet with magic and magitek and spaceships is weird enough, but Subaru’s family immigrated generations back. How the fuck did that go? Can you imagine being a random Japanese peasant circa the 1700s and then suddenly you’re on a different world that has magic and also computers.

oh gods

she looks so happy and i love her but her nickname is so stupid

and thats saying a lot considering the competition

extremely on brand

… that is the most “go ahead please” face I have ever seen

and theeeeres the competition making an abrupt return

i mean, she could still totally call you that even if you win

“tension”

i dont know if she planned it in advance, but letting harry see and underestimate her power beforehand was pretty smart

A ranged attack?

OR NOT I GUESS

she just... blew up her own arm

That’s kinda clever. And also really metal.

WHAT THE LITERAL FUCK HARRY

Thank you for the reasonable reaction

the kind of attack name you expect from a girl called buster head

Well that was fast

Oh okay they have a set time to get back in the ring. makes sense considering how easy it is for a lot of them to send people flying

nove suddenly has competition as the best punchy redhead in this show

shes so good

…you entered a martial arts competition without looking up the injury rules

I’M STARTING TO AGREE WITH ALL THE NUNS WHO DIDN’T THINK YOU WERE MATURE ENOUGH TO ENTER

i cant decide if this is smart and practical or really creepy

that is some powerful simulation

Idk if it’s just saving on fight animation, but while their powers are cool, the actual fighting technique doesn’t seem equal to what we’ve seen from vivio and einhart

gods

please get hurt less

where did that bandaid come from?!

~tempting faaaate~

SHES BITING THROUGH CHAIN?!!!

Oh no wait shes pulling on it with her teeth

That’s… more reasonable, I guess?

Still fucking badass

this is gonna be brutal

yup.

also, anime nosebleed

awwww

i love harry’s emotionally supportive girl gang

PLEASE REMEMBER THAT YOU HURT YOURSELF

this idiot

For some mysterious totally not screen-time related reason

That said, I do like them establishing that vivio&co are unusually talented even by this competition’s standards. I’d have a hard time buying that there are that many fighters on their caliber in the tournament

because as is well known the inter-middle tournament involves fighting buses

she’s just from a completely different samurai anime than everyone else

magic infused or something?

...no

Oh fuck.

Okay, scary sword girl vs. the wolkenritter’s student

…and whichever of them wins, vivio still has to fight

I feel like I have a lot in common with this announcer man

Is this like a general shyness thing, or an actual issue, or something minor that you’ve made into an actual issue…?

come to think of it, she mentioned leaving the tournament a year ago before she could fight victoria. did she also skip out on fighting mica? or was something in her fight with mica why she left

also, kudos to micaiah for having a sensible nickname

call and...

... response

the purpose of having a gang is to force your friends to be supportive of each other

How many times do you think vita’s gotten mistaken for a contestant? Actually, how many times do you think she’s got asked if she’s old enough to compete?

aww

in nanoha terms, i’m pretty sure this counts as a love confession

Oh yeah, vivio&co have a personal connection to both contestants. That’s gotta be awkward

Also, does everyone bring an entourage to this tournament?

Actually, considering zafira and vita are there, it looks like you get a couple helpers (which I think is a thing in actual fighing tournaments), and presumably most people have a coach or friend or parent, we just happen to have seen a bunch of fighters with minions

~tempting faaaate~

Okay, I get the whole “magic doesnt cause actual injuries, we just simulate them” but like micaiah isn’t using magic. That’s a real sword.

Well that’s a hell of a lot of damage from one attack. I don’t think Miura can afford to be hit again at all.

I mean, I don’t know about her but I’m definitely thinking that

haven’t mentioned this before, but miura’s outfit with the heavy shinguards is really cool and well-suited to her fighting style

pot meet kettle

miura backstory! and yeah, this makes a lot of sense. she’s very cheerful, but the way she’s nervous all the time and latches onto team nakajima so quickly makes her seem pretty isolated form her peers

and here we can see a demonstration of why carrying swords of different lengths is useful. Miura’s within the reach of Mica’s longer sword, so she switches to the shorter one to drive her back

fancy kick coming up!

Sword draw? Since she doesn’t seem to have one, I’m guessing it’s a kick that uses similar principles. Now the question is, is Miura’s secret weapon a technique that happens to be similar in principle to Mica’s fighting style, or is it a copying technique?

1) this is a very pretty shot

2) it would be really funny if instead of powering up her own sword draw, mica just ran over there and stabbed miura before she can power up the breaker

Didn’t seem to do a whole lot of damage for a special move

Oh ok, she can keep kicking like that for a while

Disadvantage of using a weapon: it can be broken

its pretty interesting that the show sets up various rematches and rivalries and thematic fights that can’t all happen by the design of the tournament. it makes the fights a lot more suspenseful when there would be plot and character reasons for either side to win

...remember what i said about how wanting to fight people in nanoha is basically a love confession?

#magical girl lyrical nanoha vivid #nanoha vivid #nanoha vivid liveblog #magical girl lyrical nanoha #vivid #mahou shoujo lyrical nanoha #long post

1 note · View note

bipolyjack · 7 years

Note

Please tell me more about why you like sheith, I'm very curious to hear the rest of it.

(alright luckily i had the beginning of this saved elsewhere when tumblr just randomly sent it early so imma just begin by pasting. also spoilers for voltron s4 obv)

the original ask was something like “curious why u like sheith? ive thought abt it and i think i prefer klance”

rubs hands 2gether Thank U for Asking

first of all, thats chill! if klance is ur thing, fuckin go for itmy dude, have a great time with that shit. the fandom’s huge andtheres tons of content. im all for ppl shippin what they want and imnot here to tell someone to ship or not ship something. if u do trulywant to know why im a sheith tho, buckle the fuck up cause im awashin sheith feelings at every moment and i got Things 2 say

alright so the main thing with sheith is that it feels realhealthy and good. (well it did. things are weird this season bc shiromay or may not be a clone but up until his disappearance at least.)they’re rly good abt checking in with each other to see how theother one’s doing and feeling, and they lean on each other a lotfor support. they also treat each other as equals and respect each other’s choices (again, with minor exceptions in the current season). they got that good good hidden backstory together. they got that good good star crossed lovers thing goin on where the universe keeps ripping them apart, fucking them over and tossing them back together more fucked up than before and my dude i Eat That Shit UP. also that good good height difference.the show gives them lots of moments where they’re either alone in a room together havin a private moment or havin an equally private moment in front of the whole fuckin team where fuckin everybody can see them (like the first Hug tm). they’re openly physically intimate with each other (which keith is not with anyone else) and they’re not like. ashamed of that. there’s so much canon content i cry daily.

here lemme break it down

we know they knew each other in the garrison, and not just like in passing, like acquaintances, but enough that keith was the only person there to see shiro off when the kerberos mission launched. in s1ep1 lance says of shiro “omg that guys my hero” and of keith “you’re my rival” but neither shiro nor keith know who lance even fuckin is. bc presumably they didnt hang out. everyone in the garrison knows who keith and shiro are but they - keith especially it seems like - dont keep track of the other students. also theres this whole fanon thing where shiro and matt were best friends in the garrison and hung out all the time before kerberos, but in s4 when matt greets shiro hes incredibly stiff and awkward and calls him sir and shiro just goes “pidge never gave up on u buddy” which i guess could be a clone thing but could also be him bein like “i totally did give up on u tho, whatever” (and i can totally buy that considering how pidge’s whole personal arc this whole time has been looking for matt and their dad, and while shiro has been supportive of that, he’s also been like hey dude that’s not our top priority as a team). so from that i infer that matt and shiro werent best buds in the garrison, and that he must have spent a lot more of his time with keith bc in s2ep1 keith makes it clear that shiro made a significant impact on his life and that he still thinks about things shiro said to him before kerberos. which we havent seen. bc theyre hiding the pre-kerberos backstory from us and i cry. also their flashbacks in s1ep2 (i think, i dont exactly remember which ep but i think its that one) when they all put on the headsets and we see their fondest memories, shiro’s is the day they were separated and keith’s is the day they found each other again like jesus.

then there’s keith’s first scene in the show. the first thing we see him doing is kicking the shit out of like three garrison guys to rescue shiro. we get that close up of him touching shiro’s unconscious fuckin face and his first line in the whole show is him saying shiro’s name. like shit dude how am i supposed 2 not ship that. the first time keith and lance interact, its lance butting in on that moment and keith being like “who the fuck are u” and its. uncomfortable. we also know that keith has been livin alone in the desert and obsessing over these lion carvings bc he got kicked out of the garrison for basically insubordination sometime after shiro went missing. we get that scene in the shack where keith talks abt feeling lost until shiro showed up and everyone else in the room looking all confused and uncomfortable as these two dudes who clearly already know each other well and have been separated for like a year just stare into each other’s eyes or what the fuck ever. also the scene outside the shack where keith comes and finds shiro and puts a hand on his shoulder and asks him how hes doing - theyre alone for that part. also worth mentioning is that keith has no hesitation touching shiro’s galra tech arm, whereas lance hesitates before shaking his hand. we see a bunch of times that keith is touch averse with almost everyone except shiro, in a way that indicates a degree of prior familiarity and a good understanding of boundaries that keith hasnt had the time or inclination to set up with lance, hunk, pidge, allura, coran etc. also the one time he holds lance when sendack attacks the castle and lance is unconscious, lance sort of blows it off later and basically goes “no homo” when keith brings it up so that was a bummer

i also love some of the Pauses they put into shiro and keith’s dialogue, some of them are just. so choice. like when keith proposes a crazy plan that puts him in danger and shiro just takes a sec, closes his eyes, then goes “alright i’ll back u up, do what u gotta do” like!!!! boi!!!!!! thats good shit. also in s2ep9 during the blade of marmora trial when keith is basically having this nightmare about shiro rejecting him because of his connection to the galra, (which real actual shiro can see because this whole ep was a fuckin fanfiction) and he does that same thing where hes like “shiro... *pause, close eyes for Just a sec* you’re like a brother to me” which! by the way!! i have said the same thing!! to a friend i had a crush on!!! who was straight!!!! and i was a little baby who didnt know i was into girls yet and we used to say we were like sisters bc i? didnt know i?? was gay???? we shared her bed whenever i stayed over and she really did see me as a sister and i would just lie next to her and daydream about touching her boobs,, anyway keith is so relatable there i could yell forever but continuing on,

can we, real quick, talk abt the first time keith flies the black lion? bc in s2ep1 hes not the black paladin yet. real shiro is still around. and keith legit goes up to black, puts a hand on her big ole nose and goes “ur boi is in trouble, we gotta help him” and she goes “yeah dude hop in” like?????????????? thats some fanfic shit again! black Knows! also dont even talk to me abt how many times keith and shiro yell each others names in that ep its unreal. also the trope (that i eat the fuck up every time) of one member of the otp lying trapped and injured somewhere and talking to the other member of the otp thru a helmet comm or whatever and they cant see each other but they can hear each others voices, so they have to keep talking to like reassure each other they’re both still alive and okay?!!! im such a sucker for that shit!!!! ummmmm the fact that shiro keeps reassuring keith that hes fine when theres a gaping glowing wound in his side and hes like visibly in pain, clenching his teeth, eyes closed, groaning, sweat beading on his forehead, the whole fuckin thing?? and josh knocked it outta the park with shiro’s voice in that ep making him sound like he was trying not to sound hurt and exhausted so that keith wouldn’t worry too much like Fuck me up!! smiling thru the pain when keith talks abt how much shiro changed his life and made him a better person??? boi!!!!!

then there are the times when shiro talks abt something happening to him and keith taking over as voltron’s leader, and keith gets all panicked about it like he cant stand the thought of losing shiro again (this happens a bunch of times but the ones that are coming to mind are s2ep1 and s2ep9 bc. again. those are the fanfic episodes). and then he Does lose him again and he’s so clearly grieving, lashing out at the rest of the team, super obviously feeling shiro’s loss more than the others (and lance is a real dick about it a bunch of times which really rubbed me wrong), going out to look for him over and over bc he wants to believe so bad that shiro’s out there somewhere. omg the “please no” when the black lion accepts him that shit Fucked me right up!! he wants to honor shiro’s wishes!! but some part of him knows that’s like admitting that shiro’s gone and isn’t coming back. and then!!!!!! when they find kuron and its just the red lion and the galra ship floating alone in space just like. gently drifting toward each other. keith’s little tired smile there. fuck me up. and then we find out in the next scene that keith has been the only one in shiro (kuron)’s room while he’s recovering and shiro (kuron) hasnt bothered to shave or cut his hair or get dressed yet and he lets keith see him like that and not the rest of the team. fuck. keith looks Exhausted in that scene. hes got bags under his eyes, hes kinda hunched in on himself, arms crossed, like something in him Knows this isnt his boi but he wants to believe it’s him so bad and its. god. its a lot. and Then when hes turning to leave and kuron is like “how many times will u have to save me before this is over” and keith’s face just relaxes into this legitimately genuine smile when he says “as many times as it takes” like!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me

this is where it starts gettin awkward with them bc kuron isnt shiro and he doesnt treat keith the way shiro would but he Tries, like after keith fucks up that one mission and kuron comes and finds him (again, in private) to touch his shoulder and be like “im proud of u boi” when keith clearly Did Not Do A Good Job and keith just looks bummed like “thats. thats not tru” and it Hurts me bc we know real shiro doesnt do fake praise. also kuron orders keith to put himself in danger more than once and doesnt give a shit that keith and the others get hurt because of it which also real shiro would never do - we’ve seen him react when his teammates take hits before, but especially keith, like during the bom trial. then theres s4ep1 where keith sort of drifts away from team voltron in order to do more stuff with the blade of marmora and everyone’s pissed at him but then as hes walking out kuron’s like “you know we’re here for you if you need us” and keith gets that soft smile again like “i know and i cant tell you how much that means to me” and then they do that good good hand clasp that turns into a hug which by the way is a stark contrast to when other people hug keith and they just kinda grab him and he goes all stiff and it takes him a sec or three to put his arms around them if he even does that at all - with shiro they do the hand clasp first and then walk into the hug together and keith buries his face in shiro’s fuckin shoulder and smiles and closes his eyes and i wanna die. and theyve done this twice now which makes me think they probs did it before kerberos too and that also hurts me.

then theres s4ep6 where keith has gone the whole season feeling like he was a bad leader. it seems like voltron doesnt rly need him and his friends dont need him and shiro doesnt need him and hes been hanging with the bom who have their whole philosophy of not going back to rescue their own guys if it means putting the mission or the rest of the team in danger (which keith already was saying when allura was captured - how very galra of him) and now keith’s having to readjust to that mindset after being part of such a close knit team. so when he sees a way to take that shield down, he just fuckin goes for it. hes started to see himself as expendable. when shiro thinks hes about to die, we get all kinds of flashbacks, the first of which is him and keith alone outside the shack. there are no flashbacks with keith. he just closes his eyes. and shiro (kuron) congratulates him. like obv its before he knows what keith was about to do, but still, thats some fucked up shit.

now this wasnt rly part of ur question, ie u didnt ask me how i felt abt klance, but i feel like i gotta say: lance just grates on me. im sorry i know lots of people who love him but he just. isnt my cup of tea. and i do think the relationship shown in the show between keith and shiro is a lot more mature and healthy than the one shown between lance and keith. lance has some good moments! but canon lance and fanon lance seem like two entirely different people to me a lot of the time and thats all cool and fine if ur lookin for that, again im not here to stop ppl from having fun, but there are so many good sheith moments in the show and im just glad to see the relationship between two dudes depicted that way regardless of whether it becomes canon or not. also lance in the show is only shown being attracted to girls, and in kinda a skeevy way - like ive met guys who treat me like that and been Very off-put by that kind of behavior. and it would put me off if after all that they got him together with keith. like hes just superficially interested in all these hot girls but keith, who he has very few heartfelt intimate moments with onscreen, is his True Love? like thats,, not good bi rep. i Do rly like the bond hes been building with allura since they switched lions, that seems like its going in a direction that could turn out to be very wholesome and sweet. but again, if klance is ur thing, by all means have a ball.

k that was a lot but tl:dr i like 2 cry and sheith provides me with lots of opportunities to do that,, if u read it all then thank u deeply and truly for ur attention, u probs Understand me as a person a bit better than before lol

#long post #voltron spoilers #s4 #sheith #this got Very long im sorry #voltron #shenanigansintime

36 notes · View notes

survivor-kuwait · 5 years

Text

Episode 18 - Finale - “praying Devon's fricking cat was gonna knock him tf over” - Matt S.

Holy Fucken Potatoes. Those three rounds were crazy. That immunity challenge was fun but my dumb as was putting astrological instead of astrology but i got to the 4th clue. The youtube video pretty fast but Timmy was quicker and I was happy for him to win. Luckily we had a plan already set which was to target Cullan. It was a 4-3 vote which was suprising cuz thought it would have been a 5-2 vote. The 10 minute to talk was very awkward and weird but oh well. The challenge unscramble was soo hard and my paper looked crazy. Im happy i have immunity for this f6 vote but i feel sad and guilty for snakely taking it away from Timmy. He tbh deserves this immunity but spelling typo has handed it to me. Which im grateful though. Timmy is my ride or die in this game and I am going to do everything in my power to make sure he survives this round without being targeted and help us reach the final 2 together. Theres more tea but for now, Timmy knows that I have the cote steal and he is the only one that does. More info tomorrow.

I’m legit flipping my game upside down right now. Matt wants to go to final 4 with me, him, Timmy, and Maynor. which like sis are you TRYING to lose this game? Like even if we did that, why the FUCK would anyone vote for Matt over TIMMY? Obviously idk where the jury’s heads are at but..I have a feeling they’re not gonna enjoy voting for Matt right now. So I’ve decided to take this horse by the reigns (making red coats redder with blood stains) bc fuck it I’ve already beat my tumblr survivor placement and I know I’m not winning a F3 immunity comp, so if I’m gonna go down with this ship before FTC, I’m not going down without a fight. I’m working with Devon. I KNOW RIGHT?! Who knew? As of now I’m going to manipulate this so either Timmy/Chips leaves, OR we send it rocks and Devon uses his power to take one of them out. I know Devon wants to use his power because he thinks it’ll look like a big move at F5 to the jury, but sis if I tie the vote? And get you to use your power to my advantage? That’s my move. At least that’s how I’d look at it as a juror. In short, snake Madison, Lady Madbeth, any other nickname for my villain side that’s been given to me thus far, is coming out at Final 5. And it’s going to make or break my game, but I’m gonna have a BLAST either way.

I cannot believe I've made it this far. A lot of us were expecting a live tribal, and I was in between plans to do either Chips or Cullan. I realized though in voting for Chips I'd be getting rid of someone I could trust over someone I couldn't trust at all. Sorry I screwed over Madison in the process but I had to do what I knew was best for ME. It's not pairs anymore unfortunately and a lot of my problems earlier had to do with allowing myself to be tethered to somneone else. It's an individual game and I have to do what I have to. I'm so glad Chips is here because he wants to do Timmy and so does Madison. He's definitely the biggest player here and I like him, but he's dangerous. It's just about convincing Devon to vote with us, which is something I consistently cannot do because Devon be a little cray cray and hard to reason with.

It looks like the ‘majority’ should be voted Devon out. Devon should be voting Chips. Is that really gunna happen? I Don’t Fucken Know TBH. Devon said that Matt and Chips were voting for Timmy. Which means Madison will also be voting that way as well if its true. There is a whole lot of mess right now and Im hoping that Timmy doesnt go tonight. His my #1 and I would be 100% vulnerable the next couple rounds if he leaves tonight. Im trying my hardest to get the votes to stay on Devon.

---

This is fucken nuts. Matt wants to take out Timmy for being a threat and Timmy wants me to use my vote steal to help him. Im trying to keep vote on Devon so Timmy would be able to stay. I need him here but also dont want Madison and Matt mad at me and vote me out 4th or 5th. I dont know what to do. I’m just ahhhhhhhh.

---

Operation Save Timmy’s Ass. Is good to go. I was able to convince Matt that Timmy had an Idol. So plan is to ‘flush this fake idol’ but vote for Devon. The vote should end up being 4-2. I hope this works. I busts my ass for 3 something hours trying to save Timmy. Id be livid if it doesnt work.

So I’m probably going home tonight and it’s not lit. Of course I would be getting 6th, stay shook America. Maynor is too trusting for his own good I think, like I don’t believe Matt when he tells maynor that he believes maynor when he says I have an idol bc let’s be real...that’s just too convenient. But Devon does have the tie thing or does he but I know maynor has the vote steal. I want him to use it tonight but also I want him to save himself in final 5 if I’m not there because it’s his advantage and he deserves to use it to Hepburn himself. I just don’t want go to jury right now because fuck, I’ve been trying so hard in this game and it’s just the so close yet so far of it all.

Alright, so yesterday there was a live challenge that was a scavenger hunt. The first clue had you look at the astrology page and then solve a slide puzzle. For some reason no matter how slow I took it or how much I paid attention to detail my youtube video would not work. So I ended up not getting past that clue.

Timmy won individual immunity because I guess his video worked. And then we were told that there was a twistos twist where we had to vote without talking before casting the vote. Luckily for me Devon had already considered this eventuality and had already brought it to my attention that it was a possibility. The thing is that when he brought it up he didn't say anything else to my response. I assumed this would mean I was getting the vote for the night...

And, it did Devon and Cullan both voted for me with one person from the "other" group of Matt and Madison. I just went with my instinct and voted Cullan since I assumed he'd be most likely to get votes. And he did. After that we were told we would immediately move into another immunity challenge! This one was like a decoder for a line of words. I was figuring it out pretty good and then my internet decided to crap out on me... so I was trying to fix that so I could be on the hangout since I thought I had to be on the hangout to progress in the challenge - I dunno.

Anyway, whenever my internet came back it was announced that Timmy had won immunity! I was pretty much set at that point to target Devon as the vote since I don't think anyone wants to particularly vote for Maynor... ... then it was announced that he did in fact not win immunity and Maynor swooped in and claimed it!

So I kind of had it in my head that maybe this might be the round to vote out Timmy since he's showing (especially the last two challenges) that he could finish out the season in an immunity run. I think it's better to have the option of voting someone out if you want to as opposed to being forced to vote out someone else. Also there's the fact that he and Maynor have a tight final two and that makes very little space to budge for others. Anyway, I touch base with Madison (who is now speaking with me about stuff, believe it or not) and she admits that she was the third vote for me and that she had voted for me before Matt had changed his mind on a plan to vote me out. I thanked her for her honesty. Alright, so then Matt approached me asking what I was thinking for the vote and I decided that since he saved me and I saved him... that why not be honest with someone. I told him I was considering Timmy. And that I just wasn't sure how exactly to swing it. Then he let me know that he and Madison were down for that. So I was pretty shocked that a plan could work out. Then Devon started freaking out - he told me that he is going to vote for me. Then I get back online a bit later and apparently he's flipped his vote to Timmy. He wants to vote out Timmy because he thinks that Timmy and Maynor and I are in a trio and apparently (got this from Matt and Madison) thinks that I am going to be playing an idol so he feels safer targeting Timmy. And now Timmy is basically telling me to please not vote him.. and things are awkward because he's telling me all of this "I've never voted you stuff" and I'm really not sure he'd understand that I'm doing it for game reasons. But I don't want to tell him that I'm voting him because Devon's already done enough damage being extra I don't want to give Timmy and Maynor (by extension) a shot at it. Anyway.. if everything works out I guess Timmy gets a majority vote with four people voting for him? If it doesn't then we could see something wonky with people not voting how they've said. Maybe I'll be voted out this time? If I am I'd be really shocked but then kind of not... or you know, maybe somebody else entirely... like Matt or Madison? Or maybe some people in my "group" will lose their nerve and Devon? I guess tribal will be exciting regardless. Anyway, I think it's hilarious that Devon wanted to target me because he's sure I'll be winning this game whenever I'm sitting here in the knowledge that I can't.

TIMMY IS VOTED OUT

I am extremely sad right now. I lost Timmy in this game and him leaving knowing we cant talk like normal is ugh. I want to get Matt and Madison back for and send them home 5th and 4th but atlas that me being emotional. Im just shutting everyone out until i get myself back together.

This was a crazy round with the instant tribal then the immediate immunity. At first I felt like I had to get chips out, but in the end Timmy was the way bigger threat strategy wise. Chips definitely has the better story and the most adversity to get here but Timmy is good at immmunity and had Maynor as an extra vote every time. Last 5 just have to find a way to get to the end.

This challenge is ugly. The only good thing is everyone is having trouble so hopefully im able to get points high enough to win.

---

Welp. Never mind. I doubt my bs of a list will win me immunity. I suck at this challenge and i just hope it doesnt cause my vote out.

---

It looks like its suppose to be Devon tonight which is alright with me. I just hope that it isn’t me going home. Ive made it this far and dont want to be cut short like right here towards the end. Matt said he would never vote for me so Im trusting him a lot right now that he’s going to keep me. Im just plain nervous right now.

---

All this got crazy in the last few minutes. Its still between Devon and Chips so thats all I care about. And looks like Matt would be the target if he doesnt in immunity in f4. So i think im good for f3. Cross my fingers. I can make it.

Alright, so that immunity challenge with the massive amount of letters and discovering Survivor players turned out to be too much for me. So I flopped and scored a 1. I feel close with Matt so I think he won't vote me out and he's the one with immunity, so I guess technically the one who calls the most shots? Apparently he and Maynor already discussed it and they are going to vote Devon. So Devon was told that he is leaving and sent me a weird message about how I won a game of tug-of-war with him but that he is voting me to win the game if I am in the final tribal council. I told him I did not understand the metaphor...mostly because I have not been pulling at "the rope" and he has... three rounds in a row. I wanted to go to the END with Devon up until that "live no hands tribal" stuff. I'm pretty aware that I am at the mercy of all of the other players and if I make it through this round I have to do my best to find in-roads to have a guarantee that I at least get to do a fire making if I get to the final four. I let Matt know that I want to go to the end with him and hope that builds up enough trust that he will want to take me. I took that opportunity to openly admit that I know the negative view of me as a player and that I have no shot and he and I compared some of Devon's notes and how Devon thinks that I am the most threatening person in the end... for some reason. Also Devon let Matt know that in the chopping block order it would go me and then Matt - I'm not entirely sure how strategy factors into sharing that information given that he wants Matt to not vote him. Honestly, I'd be shocked if Devon was even actually voting me if I made final tribal council and is not using it as some sort of ploy to try and swing people to his side to get me out this round only. Excited to see if this round shakes out unanimously against Devon, if they vote me instead, or if an idol is played by somebody?? Or FOR somebody.

Fuck me. Fuck me. Fuck me. Fuck me. I dont know what to do. Devon just offered to be f4 boot if Matt wins immunity next round. I might take it up and vote Chips cuz he is a threat and then hopefully take out Devon next round.

---

This crazy as mess. But looks like itll be a tamed vote 4-1. Perhaps.

CHIPS IS VOTED OUT

Final Immunity Challenge is tonight and Im very nervous for it because I want to win it to make sure I’m in the final 2. If not Ill be very paranoid the whole time until the vote. I dont want to go home 4th when Im just one tribal away. I know Matt has my back and Madison made a promise but both of them have lied to me so they could easily be doing so now. I just have to try and win it for myself or I have to make sure it isnt me next.

Well here it’s the last shot to guarantee a spot in the final. Almost 2 months has come down to one night to ensure you make it to the end. I have to be honest when I saw the cast I was a little out of depth for myself. So many motivated individuals and so many chances to go home. But 20 people have gone before me and there are 4 left, it has been a journey for sure. So many people wanted this position and now I have to take it, or else it’s bye bye time. If Matt wins it almost guarantees him the finals win with his character arc. From having a majority and smooth sailing his allies went home one after another. He was at the bottom and he held on and eventually controlled the game at the end until last round where an hour before tribal I was going home. But I was able to convince Madison and Maynor that chips was the bigger threat and Matt went along with it. It’s been a ride and I sure hope it’s not over!

Im literally hoping I can pull of a win for the last immunity. I just want safety for the last round. My heart is pounding cuz friend picked me up and he fucked stopped to sit down to fucken eat food in less than a hr before the challenge. I might die if he eliminates me from the this final immunity.

Devon: was shot in the shoulder and can’t do a pressure cooker me: has muscular dystrophy and can’t do a pressure cooker. my game ends here folks

Tonight is the night and I literally just went to the bathroom just to make sure there are no bodily inhibitors to me succeeding in beating Devon (and hopefully everyone else) so that I can guarantee myself a spot in the F3. I have never ever in my life come this close and it's so so so crazy. I'm proud of the way I played and hopefully I won't have to start exploring contingency plans on what happens if fricking Devon steals a spot from the MMM alliance. I truly feel that it would be me going home.

---

I swear to god I was sitting there, on the eve of my 2 year anniversary with my partner, praying Devon's fricking cat was gonna knock him tf over. Waking up and seeing Maynor won is an absolute ray of sunshine because I was SO worried it would come to a point where I would have to go to a tiebreaker with Maynor or Madison whom I love or just probably end up going home. Not to say there isn't still a chance that things don't go my way here, but I think it not only makes strategic sense to eliminate Devon, but also I just have faith in the bond I've formed with M&M that they will take me through to the final 3. From there, I don't know what will happen, but I can honestly say I'm proud.

I won the Final Fucken Immunity. Im so happy. It was my first ever doing an endurance comp. I wanted to give it my all and I was luckily able to win. Now what to do Madison, Matt or Devon? Matt has been one of my closest allies in this game. But he can be seen as the ‘leader’ of the endgame. Theres Madison who played kinda like me, only got 1 vote, and a huge social threat. Devon has been playing a lackluster game and idk if he would win but has friends in the jury. Gunna be a tough choice.

---

I have to go on a date today with a slight limp. Thanks for that you guys. 🙃 So it looks like Madison is giving me the power who to tell her to vote for. Im leaning towards Devon now because this comp performance was very good and could get peoples votes in the end. I feel like I can dismantle his game more than Devons.

Well this is is it, I should have tried harder in that challenge I just was getting so tired I was gonna pass out from being so tired. Now I am in the predicament where it’s me or matt tonight. The plan was since f6 for it to be me Madison and Maynor but I feel that slipping a little today. I really believe I will more than likely take another 4th place. I have done my plea and I do really feel matt will win in the end if he gets there. I guess I just couldn’t keep my foot in the game.

youtube

DEVON IS VOTED OUT

Well. Matt stayed. I hope it was a mistake to keep Matt. I wanted out M&M&M alliance to be f3. Hope im able to gwt enough votes to win.

This truly could be the game that I actually win. I felt in the beginning that I was in a better mindset to play Survivor and that I had a good idea of how I was gonna play the game lined up. Of course that was thrown away almost instantly thanks to twists but I still kept the attitude. This game has been all about growth for me, finding idols, winning immunity, making genuine relationships with people, it's all new to me, and it's not the same person I was in Maluku, Ancient Greece, or even Solomon Islands; although this is the first game I've played on anti-anxiety medication so maybe that was the ticket for me. I can say with certainty that it's the best game I've played and that I truly believe I am the best of the three finalists, and maybe Maynor would agree with me considering he tried to pull a fast one on me AND blame it on Madison. All I can do now is present myself in the best way I possibly can, own my game, and hope the relationships I've built will get me the win.

I dont know if we need to do anymore of these but heres one. Maybe ill do one more. Idk. Its crazy that I made it to ftc. Do I have a chance of winning. I dont know but someone told me to be confident in the game i played and be proud. Im going to try and do that. Havent had much luck in these ftc. Im just happy I made it to the end. I hope i have a chance to win.

#survivorstarzone #episodes

0 notes

hunkkeiths-blog · 7 years

Note

So I just scrolled 20000 years back on your blog like the creep I am and I saw you mention schizophrenic Keith headcanons but never actually saw schizo Keith headcanons and I'm 👀👀👀

once again thank you so much for sending this! i really really love this au but i never talk about it bc i feel like no one cares and this makes me sooo happy!

also sorry again for answering late i just wanted to be able to type everything relatively quickly and use a readmore

(i added links that lead to wiki pages to explain what certain stuff is, you don’t need to click them or anything)

ok so here goes

[Food mentions and slight emeto for this part]

Keith has a lot of trouble with food, both bc of sensory issues and paranoia

when its sensory, its mostly if the texture is too different to whats hes used to, or if theres too much taste and theres anything else (a sound, some lights flashing, whatever) hell get overwhelmed really easily. so he tries to stick to relatively tasteless stuff

Keith also gets a lot of persecutory delusions and some of the most recurring ones is that his food has been poisoned, having relatively tasteless food helps with not being as convinced of that

On good days (well as good a day as you can have when you think your food has been poisoned anyway), he can sort of just power through it and eat enough to not be starving.

On bad days, he either doesn’t eat at all, or if he only realises it after having eaten he becomes sick/makes himself sick.

Back on Earth, especially during his year alone, he had 3-4 “trusted foods/brands” and he almost exclusively only ate those

Once on the ship, things get very complicated, because from the start, he doesn’t trust the altean food goo (he still doesn’t if he’s entirely honest, but they’ve all been eating it and none of them are dead yet so if it is poisoned its slow acting enough) so he mostly only eats when hes absolutely starving for the first month or so before he slowly starts to eat more of the altean meals

He does however trust what Hunk cooks partly because he trusts Hunk, partly because Hunk eats it too, and (taste+texture of the food goo aside) hes always more comfortable when Hunk cooks.

[Warning ended]

While developing and after when he had it (which was 2 or 3 years before he entered the Garrison), Keith ended up almost entirely isolated from people, in part because he would willingly withdraw from others, in part because the people who took care of him after his father left/died (foster families i guess? i dont really know how the system works and i cant imagine how much worse it must be for a schizophrenic kid so) didn’t really know what to do with him because he had really bad emotional blunting

Because he was mostly left alone, he started focusing alot on the delusions he had at the time, the main one of which was that he just wasnt human (which yes turned out to be somewhat true, but it’s still a delusion). that led him to thinking of going to space because of a feeling that something would happen there. which led him to the garrison which is how he ended up there.

At the Garrison, he was amazing at flying and mediocre at best in all his other classes.

This is partly because outside of doing stuff that could actually directly get him to space, he wasnt able to get any motivation to do anything else. (even if he gets kicked out, he can just steal a rocket or something right?)

he also didnt really have any friends because he didnt approach anyone and more or less actively avoided anyone trying to get close to him.

the way he just was; never showing any emotion, barely speaking, the weird things he sometimes did, etc; sort of drove ppl away on its own

(this is also sort of the reason he didnt remember him and lances “rivalry” in s1ep1. he never actually noticed lance thought of him as a rival, he just thought lance was sort of loud)

Shiro ended up like being a mentor or something to Keith, and Keith wasnt able to really avoid him

They start off sort of rocky, because Keith hates interacting with other people, due to paranoid thoughts (”he can read my mind”, “he wants to hurt me”, and so on) that, while they werent nearly as bad as off meds, were still present even with medication.

Slowly though, Keith warms up to Shiro and starts trusting him (though shiro is never really sure because Keith doesnt show it at all)

Keith starts doing better in all his classes, because he’s interpreted that shiro will be extremely disappointed in him if he ends up getting kicked out because of poor grades, and hes terrified of disappointing literally the only person in the world he trusts

It also leads to Keith putting a minimum of effort into becoming at least somewhat expressive

When the kerberos mission fails, keith is destroyed. all his grades almost instantly drop and he barely shows up to class because losing the only person he trusts essentially makes him totally apathetic, and go back to having alot of paranoid thoughts/delusions (mostly surrounding the garrison staging the entire thing, sort of fake moon landing style but with actual murder to make people back off on exploring space because of Something), and feeling like he’s being stalked by people (not entirely untrue tbh), and deal with anhedonia. and thats how he gets kicked out/how he drops out

Living entirely alone (as in without any supervision) was hell for Keith.

Moving to the shack after dropping out messed with his entire routine, and without a relatively strict routine, he ends up forgetting his meds

Off medication, he had really really really horrible episodes that almost always ended with him getting hurt in some way

Off-meds, he starts his garrison/shiro conspiracy wall

He also found the blue lions cave during an episode

After a while (keith never tries to find out how much time he spent without his meds because he forgot about them), he ends up taking his antipsychotics again, and almost destroys the wall, except theres a feeling he still has that he rememebers he had during an episode.

He ends up going to the cave again, and “Holy shit that was real??” so he restarts his wall while being a bit more down to Earth.

The day shiro crashes on earth is one of the best days of his life bc, well, shiro, but also because he was actually right for once.

Overall, Keith’s pretty good at organising his thoughts and not speaking incoherently, but if hes at all stressed, hell go through a lot of thought blocking

It’s really annoying because Keith hates not being understood and not finishing his points, but often, even if the person hes talking to reminds him what he was talking about, he cant remember what he was going to say after

He also used to think that the thought blocking was aliens and/or the government stealing away all his thoughts to study humans (or, before the garrison: not entirely human entities)

His thoughts are alot more disorganised than his speech shows (under normal circumstances, there are occasions where he does get mostly incoherent). He’s learned to think of what hes going to say step by step before saying it

What he says often still comes off as not entirely thought out, rude, etc because thinking about what order words are going to come out of his mouth doesnt fix not understanding how to interact with others

And here’s a bunch of stuff i couldn’t really make long enough to warrant a separate section:

Keith stims mostly when hes nervous or bored, and he stims by scratching his nails against things, because he likes the sounds it makes.

[self harm (sort of)] at some point, the team notices that when theres nothing for him to scratch (like a wall or something), hell scratch at his own skin, because scratching fabric feels/sounds horrible, often until he scratches part of it off. so they make him these little squares of material to scratch at

Keith does a lot of magical thinking (i cant find an easy link for this but in this case its like seeing signs in things that are seemingly unrelated if that makes sense) where he’ll see a ‘sign’ and feel like he has to do something (what something is varies from something very specific to just “something”)

since he obviously cant always do what hes supposed to do after seeing the signs, hes started writing down everything so he can do it later (lance’s idea). it helps a lot.

Keith hates places with background noises that arent constant (like they stop and start, stop and start), even if they arent particularly loud, because he loses his entire train of thought whenever it stops or starts

Ok! that’s all I can think of right now, I hope this answered what you were looking for!

I lost my entire train of thought at least 5 times while typing this so I’ll probably add more things in my tag later on when I think of them again!

I’m also writing an actual story with this, it should come out around the end of June if you’re interested!

#schizo keith #i did not reread this im sorry if parts are incoherent #keith #voltron #vld #Anonymous

32 notes · View notes