#i didnt even think about his wording but yooooo

[sophfandoms53]

Alastor’s deal with Charlie was for “One favour for a time of my choosing where you harm no one”. Because of that wording, while Alastor won’t be able to make Charlie do anything bad to anyone, he will be able to make her do absolutely nothing, as something she would otherwise be able to stop happens. Charlie has just given Alastor a shutdown button for all her demonic power.

ANON THE WAY MY JAW DROPPED HOLY SHIT

And in Ready For This he sings;

“She’s filled with potential that I could guide.”

What IF he wants to help her control those powers (bc as badass as Charlie was in the finale she struggled A LOT even in her demon form, which makes sense she’s a pure hearted bean and its hard for her to hurt anyone) so that way when she meets her full potential those powers are HIS and he can use them to cut HIS strings??

THE POSSIBILITIES.

[weirdcat1213]

TRIGUN BOOKCLUB? MORE LIKE TRIGUN TRAUMA CLUB, AM I RIGHT :D

anyway

trimax volume 4 thoughts here we go oh boi oh boi :D

chap 1:

-hospital yuri you are so important to me you have no idea

-....countdown to what

-I LOVE THAT SCENE LMAO, boyfriend taking care of his boyfriend

-...why are the tomorrows appearing this early

-yey :D earth here we go

-whos giving vash that stupid tie i love him

-AH SHIT GET OUTTA HERE YO

-also aw :3 they are both creppy as hell :3 bros

-OH GODNESS THAT PANEL I FORGOT ABOUT THAT. ITS BASICALLY A CONVERSATION WITHOUT WORDS

-AW NO HES GOING BACK TO WORK MODE

-"i cried all day" ME MEMEMEMEMEME

chap 2:

-yeah bro kill them with the power of music >:D

-pure evil you say....interesting...

-anyway THE BASTARD IS HERE, GET HIM

-he has vash's smile what if jumped off the plane

-oh hes crazy i like it

-ok but...why does he have to be so cool....god damnit

-glad you have it clear

-legato you ARE SO DOWN BAD FOR KNIVES CMON MAN

-knives wins again the idgaf war lmaoooo

-thats what you get for bringing musical instruments to a knife fight

-MEANWHILE

-hey if you can keep secrets from vash i think its fair he keeps some stuff for himself too

-ah...yeah....i forgot about that.....why are you like this....

-i love the girls so much

chap 3:

-lmao they were just in the hospital

-YEAH MILLY TO THE RESCUEEEE

-BADASS MERYLLLL

-hey arent those the gloves she uses in stampede-

-OOOHHHH THEYRE HEREEEE

-wolfwood what if you shut up. like yeah you're right but. shut up. pls

-LIKE THOSE ARE HIS FRIENDS SIR CMONNNN

-PLS >:CCCCCC STOP

-"thats the tough part" yeah cuz they may not know everything but they KNOW YOU and that's everything for a lonely man such as yourself huh

-yooooo thats so interesting cuz imagine sealing your life like that and regretting all the killing and suffering you caused, sadly they have to pay for what they chose. nice karma if you ask me. and to make it even better nai (aka the mf with the god complex) is the one with the higher power to seal lives like that

-wait so like a swarm of bugs took meryl? this is one of the confusing volumes for me so help me here

chap 4:

-AW MILLY MY GIRLLLL :c

-WAIT WERE THE BUGS IN HER MOUTH??

-yeah exactly gauntlet, just kill the people responsible instead of by proxy, nice nice

-ah shit hes so mad

-AH SHIT

-and there he fucking goes out of the window, go get her my mna

-zazie pls dont say that...dont say that

-i love that the gun ho guns KNOW how to upset vash: by challenging him in a place full of people :D like this man has made his weakness so obvious yet he has survived so far

-"... no :]" i love her sm

-i like that she didnt have to prove herself (that's just sexist) BUT i would have liked my milly vs wolfwood combat

-oh that looks gorgeous actually

and....i remembered where are we going now :)

chap 5:

-you are a bullet you say? you mean it? (mcr reference I'm sorry)

-AH NOT HIS BRAIN DAMN

-MILLY CMONN GIRLLLLLL

-sadly, he kinda is

-i love him and his "coins? dont be silly I'm here for my friend" attitude

-hmmm i wonder why he gets the impression vash is enjoying the fight, is it because of his quick draw?

-yey context for meryl :D

chap 6:

-OH I LOVE THE TITLE PANEL DAMN THATS GOOD

-nooooo :c he looks so young and little

-hold up hes right whats with that face lmao

-yowza

-:c aw here we go

-and heres with the tone changes and DEAR GOD I'm sad now

-...gates you say.....-

-YEY THE REVEAL IS HERE WOOOOOOOOOOO :c

-wolfwood nooooooooooooooooooooo i remember i was so worried about this

chap 7:

-ok i fucking HATE HOW YOU CAN SEE GAUNTLET'S WORDS SHATTER HIS LITTLE HEART >:C

-well that panel fucking hurts

-LET HIM FINISH OMG STOP

-yeah you go babygirl >:3 get revenge

-also i deadass forgot vash wanted to kill him like holy fuck we should talk more about that. he really has more rage on him than any other version *so far*

-:c

-i get why but omg why, just why

-IS IT HER TIME???? IS SHE HERE??????

-WAIT THIS IS HOW THE VOLUME ENDS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DA HELL

[twinanimatronics]

I'm just sort of laughing because of how injuries work, they look way worse the next day as the swelling sets in. Recently got into a battle with the kitchen knife, it won, and my hand looks so angry with me. Protag is gonna look like a train hit them. The length they had been up and running on adrenaline of the situation was making me exhausted thinking about it. I wouldn't have had the energy to yell/be angry so much at Sun. Especially after finding out the deep rooted anxiety/social issues he seems to be displaying. Regardless if he had made a terrible mistake, I would empathize with Sun's situation. Though I would take Sun's treating of Moon personally since I was so close to my own brother. tbh protag was giving me anxiety with how forcefully they demanded the answers and kept using Sun as a punching bag lol Poor Sun being all like the most kicked puppy there ever was. Also cursing like a sailor, definitely need sleep, maybe hangry too? Definitely plenty of room for character growth, I live for this :) Though kudos for the protag for sticking to their guns and not run away from the situation, I personally am a pacifist at heart so I would have clocked out emotionally and looked for a place to be alone for the next several hours until I could reset and deal with the fallout. I seriously need to draw some of the scenes, there are just too many great animated moments from all the characters. I will be getting an art tablet finally in about a month or so so I can finally ditch the traditional sketch and failing with the computer mouse method :D Best wishes!

They already feel like a train hit them so XD

And, well, Sun kinda ignored boundaries with his forcing his way into the shower. I don’t know about you but I’ve actually had that done to me before and it is the most rage inducing experience imaginable. Sun got off lightly

All the anger after that was at his and Moon’s original Handler/Creator. The most Protag is really upset with Sun over is how he was towards Moon, which you yourself said you’d take personally. And they aren’t that stubborn or intend on holding it against him. (I went back and tweaked the wording about them still being mad when Sun started carrying them so now it specifies that they’re finding it difficult to be after everything they’ve been told.)

My original plan also intended for Protag to hug Sun after his whole episode with scrubbing the wall.

But…

Naked and wet…

The scenario and the amount of cursing I put in normally already pushed the envelope enough as is that if I pushed any more I would have to bump the rating up to Mature

Honestly I wonder if I still should at this point. I don’t know.

If I do, then maybe I will go back to include that hug.

Djdjdjejdj glad that even tho you dont agree with everything I made the protag do you still like em XD

And yooooo, congrats .o.

I remember when I got my first art tablet

And when drawing didnt hurt my hand so much djejdjejdjekkd

—cries in carpal tunnel—

[jimlingss]

I can't believe you ended chp 16 of Jp like that...i want to fight 😭

if you fight me, i’m guaranteed to be hospitalized ((look at these noodle arms)) and then who will post the next chapter on Monday? uh huuuh, that’s what I thought. Think twice before you wanna square up. (ง •̀_•́)ง

I am now answering spoiler-y messages below, so beware....

[SPOILER ALERT] 

*SPOILER ALERT**SPOILER ALERT**!SPOILER ALERT!*

Massive spoilers to come, please do not read if you have not yet read Jungle Park Chapter 16. Or go ahead and read if you’re chaotic like that.

Anonymous said: ok but what if oc and Hoseok were actually engaged....

I’m an idiot, anon - I accidentally deleted your ask before I copied it correctly lol oops, but ding ding ding! correct! you’re a winner!! i believe you sent me this message like 2 chapters ago and honestly you freaked me out by how accurate you were. dammit, I might’ve been too predictable, but you catch on quick. sorry i couldn’t answer sooner hahaha i couldn’t risk other people jumping on the same theory. you’re a genius tho, i’ll give you props for it.

Anonymous said: DATED!FOR 4 YEARS! ENGAGED! Omg wow shit really hit the fan like there is no coming back omg Wowoowoeoeoeooew I’m SHOOK like I never expected that like NEVER!!!

Anonymous said:I KNEW IT!!! i had a feeling it was either a really long relationship or they were engaged at one point. TURNS OUT IT WAS BOTH omg gahdhsjxbjsjs I'm so excited to see this all just unravel omgomgomgomg

kawaii-ing said: FhbsjshJuxYhUgrnziVJgdjsbdud JUNGLE PARK CHAPTER 16 JUST WRECKED ME YO 😱😱😱😱😱 HE KNOWS AND SHE DOESNT KNOW HE KNOWS IM SO CURIOUS FOR WHATS GONNA HAPPEN NOW Btw lovvvveeee your writing, thanks for all your hard work boo xxx💜💜

ASDFGHJKL I SAID SHIT WOULD HIT THE FAN AND I FOLLOWED THROUGH, RIGHT?? AREN’T YOU PROUD! THERE’S NO CLICKBAIT ON THIS BLOG HAHAHA 

Anonymous said: omgg 4 years? ENGAGED?? I’m ??? jut WHAT happened

:O :O

Anonymous said: BROOOOOOO! THEY WERE ENGAGED :o *insert Pikachu meme*

pikachu meme?? hahaha is that a sarcastic surprise? so you weren’t actually? lolololol :O

Anonymous said: Ahh I loved jungle park 16!! I'm so excited for the angst to come 👀 is hoseok's car accident related to oc at all?

hmm guess you’ll have to wait and see ((but also just putting it out there that if it was related that would be pretty makjang and lol im not about that life with this series))

Anonymous said: (1)oh holy hell Kina,,,my head’s hurting bcs of JP:16. ENGAGED what?? huh. now its one of my fav chapters, like 4-6 (ah those innocent cute baby steps in hoseok’s&oc’s relationship,,,not THIS). but freaking FINALLY someone spilled the beans. i love this kind of scenes, THE truth revelation. chang’s unaware of storm hes causing with his words, hoseok’s world’s simply crushing, oc doesnt know yet whats happening&dae is helplessly watching from sidelines trying to stop the catastrophe&failing

Anonymous said:(2)thats sad. i kinda can imagine what hoseoks feeling now, plagued w question that almost no one’s willing to answer, that drive him crazy.what happened? why did oc hide the truth? what did i do, how bad did we hurt each other? why can’t i remember any of it fuck. its a perfect opportunity for insecurities&ugly thoughts&inner demons to poison his mind. and oc...her house of cards collapsed revealing things she was trying hard to escape. will she feign ignorance again or will she finally face it

Anonymous said:(3)i just hope that in the end after this storm theyll reach their own peace, whatever the outcome will be. past stays in past, but only if every issue is resolved. otherwise it might return later&be worse than before. it was a great chapter. thank you — chem

THE BEANS HAVE BEEN SPILLED!!! honestly the universe is in chaos right now lol Hoseok’s like the fuck....and oc doesn’t even know lol but yeah it’s definitely a sad situation for almost all parties. there’s still more to be revealed tho, like the actual details of what the fuck went on haha anyways, i’m glad you’re enjoying it!

Anonymous said: AAHHHHH ITS FINALLY HERE!! Thank you 💞💞. Wow it was truly a lot and honestly, I feel kinda scared for Hoseok... it’s crazy that he really doesn’t remember anything and learning all this new information is like being in another word. If this story wasn’t one about love and fluff, it could’ve totally turned into a horror story lol. Thank you again and I’m very excited to see where the story goes!!

a horror? can’t say im very good at the genre but that’s definitely an interesting concept....the more i think about it....like for someone to go through something suppper traumatic and not remember at all and someone appears in their life but it turns out that someone was actually the serial killer? dammmmn that would be really interesting. i digress, thank you for enjoying it. definitely Hoseok is lost, scared, confused.

Anonymous said: SHIT’S 🗣 HITTING 🗣 THE 🗣 FAN 🗣 omg *insert “she’s meditating” “she’s dead” meme* and the fact that this is just the beginning??? how?? what?? i’m honestly so skek for the next chapter like i dont think hoseok’s gonna go apeshit on yn but you never know now do you ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ superb chapter for reals!!!! like, all of your writing is great but this chapter?? *chef’s kiss* didnt even know i was an angst fan until this chapter lol sending all my love to you!!! - chanting anon

hahhahahahhahaha there’s a lot more to unravel. now the puzzle has been exposed, we gotta start looking at the details. thank you for the message *throws chef’s kiss back* also welcome to the angst realm lol

Anonymous said: finals starts at the 20th and school ends in the 24th and we're still at chap 1 on our research. Due to stress, i thought, hey, might as well read the latest chapter bUT WHO KNEW IT WOULD BRING ME MORE STRESS. FOUR YEARS?! ENGAGED?! i feel like hoseok right now. You make such awesome stories and worlds. It affects me in so many good ways i cant even. i dont always give you my thoughts per chapter but i want you to know that i scream at every single one of them. have a nice day! - anon h.a.n.d.

oh my goodness!!! good luck on your exams!! hahah im sorry the chapter isn’t very much comfort food and kind of more wild but still happy you enjoyed it! 

Anonymous said: PT. 15 & 16?! WHAT. I COME BACK TO TWO CHAPTERS. HOLY COW. but really, like now that I know what I know, I’m so sad. I wonder what their relationship was like. That’s a lot of time to invest in someone and for it to fall apart like that... I couldn’t imagine what OC had to go through. I’m sad BUT THE DEVELOPMENT IS MAKING ME SO FREAKIN EXCITED. THANK YOU FOR GIVING US SOME ANSWERS ABOUT THE PAST. I CANT WAIT TO SEE HOW MUCH ELSE HE FINDS OUT.

I KNOW RIGHT?? LIKE FOUR YEARS IS A FUCKING LONG TIME. then again that was like 8 years ago. but yeah, it’s sad for both oc and Hoseok, y’know? I’M GLAD YOU’RE EXCITED!!!

Anonymous said: Great Jungle Park chapter! I'm pissed because SOMEONE SPOILED IT and i saw they were engaged before i could even click on the 'read more',,, but great chapter! I wish i could've read it without knowing, it kinda made me sad and it was not as great as it could have been.. @people spoiling, fuck off >:(( @you you're the best writer ily u nice keep going!! Can't wait to have Hoseok's full mind process over how crazy it is he doesn't remember 4 YEARS and an ENGAGEMENT (and only 2 dates huhu)

haha chill, anon. did you actually know that spoilers can make someone enjoy a story more? it’s actually a really interesting thing to google and find out more about. the chapter’s still the same whether you had an inkling of what was going on or not. you still enjoyed it too, right?  :D 

Anonymous said: CRAP OK, well, we knew it was something more than two days, but HONESTLY lol I love how you wrote y/n trying to keep it together. I could feel her fear as she lost control of the situation when Hoseok showed up. Do you think in her mind she even slightly expected him to show up? I'm assuming she's very internal w/ her thoughts/feelings seeing as she doesn't talk to anyone about what happened between her & Hobi all those years ago nor has she dealt w/ it, mostly just avoided it, would you say?

oh yeah oc was on the verge of a mental breakdown when he showed up rofl, damn near scared her. he was basically like a jumpscare LOL. but yeah for sure she didn’t expect him to come. i mean she basically told him and he was like ‘ok whatever’ and didn’t express interest and it’s not like he got an invite so she didn’t know he would actually go out of his way to show up. and yeah i agree, oc’s very internal with her feelings, or at least what happened all those years ago. it’s sensitive issues anyway that she’s left behind. or at least tried to.

tofugguk said: BROOO i LITERALLY— LITERALLY LOST IT. WHEN CHANGSUB DROPPED THEM BEING TOGETHER FOR LIKE FOUR YEARS THEN THE- “You guys even got engaged.” PART I SCREAMED. YOOOOO I CANTTT HANDLE THIS

Changsub isn’t the dumbass that we wanted. But the dumbass we needed.

((don’t you love how oc tried so hard to keep it a secret for like 16 chapters aka like near a year and some idiot comes trapezing in and in his first scene he just spills all the beans??? hahahha))

[mc-slowwalker]

I have a prime sub but it’s to karl… who never streams :’((( I miss karl he should stream more. I have literally never been gifted a sub and a friend of mine has been gifted so many like, george, ranboo you name it. 3 hours after I started typing this I got gifted a punz sub lets gooo. gonna be watching his mcc ad and we’ll see about the ads

so true I 100% agree. cheating is always morally correct. “academic integrity” like okay uni whatever you say it’s literally has no weight if you’re studying to pass an exam instead of actually learning. we should be studying to learn not pass an exam. yeah exactly!! knowledge shouldn’t cost this much.

lmaooo trueee and also moood. (about the antisocial/awkward stuff I feel like to didnt make sense just like that what I was referring to with the next sentence starting with “like”) like I feel bad about feeling toxic about the twitter updates account thing because like I’ve been a person from the twitter updates account but like I’m not toxic for no reason afterwards. yeah it’s 100% so frustrating!! like a while ago I remember seeing “oh I’m not sending dts on dream’s behalf I’m sending them on mine” like huh???? do you not see the problem with that??? ughhh I get you tho I was annoyed with the kaceytron stream as well. I didn’t watch it tho like I watched a bit and was like fuck this then left. yeah I also hate it when he goes on streams of people who actively talk shit about him like :/// lowkey I feel like I’m just a bit too defensive of him sometimes because of all the unnecessary shit he gets from so so many people but at least I recognise that ig. I swear tho, his twitter stans get him in wayy more shit than he does. like that one account that counted the days made me so mad. but yeah it is kind of the same stuff. like I try not to cause I know it’s the same but like when I do it, it feels justified and not just being shitty for no reason but take away all that and it is really the same. like not to be a gatekeeper buuuuut. I’m very good at ignoring it all tho

that’s really cool but also spanish as a requirement in uni (/college idk)??? never heard of that. oh dang that’s cool I’ve always wanted to know more languages. language and the way people use it and like communication in general has always been so interesting to me. I want to say something about like my strong use of “like” now cause I’m noticing it. yeah exactly, the way people communicate online is so interesting!

tubbo should start war with foolish about the beets. that would be funny I think. and amazing lore. cause like not all lore has to be all high production. like I love hugh production lore, I love funny, silly lore, I love “semi” lore I’d enjoy it all. just log onto the smp and like idk do literally anything I will count it as lore. everything that has ever happened on the smp is canon to me. tubbo could literally just like nuke someone and start a whole new storyline. he should nuke the prison. I would say nuke foolish’s summer home over the beets but I’d be too sad about that and it’s a bit of an overreaction. there is much potential and I love tubbos character. also ranboo?? he just said that enderwalk was c!ranboo with all his memories and just like dipped and went to the uk. I do get that they’re all very busy tho and it can be difficult to find the time and all that I haven’t watched much of the bear smp but it looks cool and I may get into it at some point. I feel like I just don’t have any time these days tho

he didn’t drop off the face of the earth!! he did a 5 hour long merch vc. I am australian 😔✌️so I was asleep for half of it but it was nice just listening to it when I woke up. sapanp singing was my favourite bit. like I listened to some of those songs afterwards cause I liked them but it just wasn’t the same😔😔

I feel bad for replying so late tho so sorry about that I just felt very not social all day but I do like that with anon I can kinda just come and go and it’s chill

Yooooo congrats on the gifted punz sub! Yeah I seem to have bad luck with gifted subs, random chance I’ve only gotten sapnap, the fundy gifted was a gift from a friend

The best knowledge is free anyways. Also uni/college always tries to guilt you like who are you the catholic church fuck off. Bruh I’m paying for your services you should be treating me good I’m basically a glorified customer

Bro you where a twitter updates account?? Props to you I am at all times in the worst position to know stuff. Unless I am actively live blogging I have 0 what’s going on. I’m always years late to new informations like I’ll check my phone and realize that I missed a whole lore stream. Also on twitter you can’t even send dts right??? Like here you can actually say the words death die & kill but on twitter you have to censor yourself. “Die” funny, a little threatening but ultimately can be ignored. “d13” hilarious not at all threatening?? Wait this makes it seme like I am cool with death threats I’m not but I’ve gotten a fair share and seen other people get them and they’re always funny to me. Telling someone to die isn’t funny but being told to die is very funny if that clarifies anything. I thinknI watched a lot of the kaceytron stream (however I watched it through a dream fan streaming the stream so she didn’t get any views/money) and the whole thing was extremely upsetting. I can be defensive of him too, not so much for him but more for me. I know he can probably handle most of it but how dare people insult stuff I like. It’s less defending his honor and more how dare people disrespect me through disrespecting things I like. Plus if it ever is too much for dream I know his friends will come in clutch. Bbh saying stuff is the indicator tm that what people are saying about dream is bullshit

Does college means something different to the rest of the world? In the us it’s almost interchangeable with uni except universities can give you a doctorate while college can only get you your undergrad. It’s less that spanish is required and more that we’re required to take two years of a language and I just chose spanish. I’ve met so many people who either only speak spanish or have spanish as their first language that knowing the amount that I do has actually come in handy. Dont think about the like thing too much trust me. It’s a really good comma and indicator that you’re speaking casually but the more you notice it the more upsetting it becomes

I think the beets could be a great plot point because beets suck and I hate them!! I really do like silly lore but I hate the effect it has on the fandom. I haven’t forgiven people for writing off the l’sandburg lore. In the words of the wisest man I ever knew “everything I do on the dream smp is canon to some extent”. Accept that silly lore is canon folks!! That’s what makes the dream smp so much fun! Also high production lore can be super lame guys please this is roleplay in minecraft chill

Wait about tubbo’s lore did we ever find out who stole the one nuke? I don’t watch a lot of ranboo’s stuff but I’m very happy that enderwalk ranboo is besties with c!dream theory is coming along nicely. Uno au my beloved. No about the bear smp stuff I’d also like to get into ballsmp, more of hermit craft, and 3rd life but I’m busy too? Like college hasn’t even started and I’m already sweating. Speaking of other smps do you remember that smp that karl and quackity were invited to but never logged on? Ahoddj that was hysterical. Never gonna watch it, just think it’s funny that they were invited and decided you know what nah

The 5 hour long merch podcast my beloved!!! I had two favorite parts (other than sapnap singing) the first was when he said the alright and we all complained enough that he decided to keep streaming and the second was the final alright where he said bye and then dipped with 0 hesitation while sap & george were still in the call sjsjdk

Again no worries I’ll always be here to answer no rush for anything I’m simply vibing at all times

[s0ftkwan]

Yooooo friends to lovers seungkwan would be really nice 😊😊

late post…..again sorry but thank u

seungkwan was a family friend you knew since you were like 4

his mom and yours were college friends who were just so excited about seeing each other again when they moved into your neighborhood

they were even more excited when they learned that their children were the same age!!

matchmaking mother time

basically how you actually became close was because of your moms

the constant playdates, the dinners with the fam, the enrolling in the same school

the force behind your relationship with kwan was your own mom

but that didnt mean you hated it!!

seungkwan was literally an angel

an a n g e l

perhaps the nicest boy you have ever met and will ever meet

has the kindest eyes and the purest heart

this was when boo was a soft spoked child with the shyest smile and the smallest giggle

also your second mother most of the time

one time you scraped your knee from chasing a butterfly

found you crying near the creek behind your house

scolded you with the “i told you so” line like how he scolded cheol in the boomboom dancing game thing u know

he would still pull out one of his hello kitty band-aids that he keeps in case you hurt yourself though

remember, just like a mom: only scolds you because he loves cares about you

in turn, you were seungkwan protector #1

you two were in different classes in first grade and he was so scared because you were his bff!! he was such a shy bean w/o u!!

but you squished his cheeks and told him he’d be fine and if he ever need u, you’d be in the room next door

made him feel 10000x better

so lil kwan goes to class but sits beside the mean boy who is known for stealing pencils and teasing ppl

teased seungkwan for having chubby cheeks and mismatching socks the whole day

when classes were finally dismissed, you caught up with seungkwan who had tears forming in his eyes

he didnt even have to say anything and you were already pulling up the sleeves of your jumper ready to fite

the next day you stormed into seungkwan’s classroom and all the kids looked up like?? who u

and you were like “YAH! KID WHO’S BULLYING MY ANGELIC BFF BOO SEUNGKWAN COME OUT HERE AND FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN”

kid almost peed his pants when you forced him to apologize

seungkwan gained so much more confidence in himself and respect for you after that

you two only got closer and closer until high school came along

your dad told you he got a really good job offer in seoul and that he already said yes to it

your family was moving in a week and when you had told seungkwan

boy burst out into tears

“i- *sobs* w-wont m- *cough* miss y-you *chokes* what a-are you t-talking a-bout?“

after a good 2 hours he finally calmed down

helped you pack the whole week

and then ended up crying like that in the airport again

anways

contrary to popular belief, distance didnt create a gap in your friendship with seungkwan

you two definitely called, texted, facetimed, emailed, etc everyday

he texted “fighting!!” to you everyday and would even put in a few more words if he knew you had a big event on that day

you would always call him if he had one to and try to calm him down

and if he didnt answer, you would leave him a voice mail cheering him up

facetiming was your constant thing though

even if you had an important test the next day, whenever you would see his caller id on your screen, you would drop everything and answer it

you would talk about so many things

from popular topics like “taylor swift or katy perry” this is such old news im sorry to the most obscure topic like “are there llamas in the desert??”

you two stayed up just talking to each other one time that you watched the sunrise together through a screen

you could see that he was struggling to keep himself awake as he was humming a song to himself

which then turned into singing

seungkwan was always known for his beautiful voice, but surprisingly you only seemed to truly appreciate it now when he was a hundred miles away from you

it made your heart ache for the boy you grew up with

all you wanted was to see him and tell him how much you love him

…. what

it finally dawned on you that you had fallen in love with your best friend

a few days after that facetime, seungkwan calls you again

he’s screaming half of the time and you’re like ‘boo calm down i cant hear you if im deaf’

he does calm down and excitedly tells you that he’s moving to seoul for college after his graduation!!!

you look at the calendar hanging on the wall and realize that it was his graduation in three days but you couldnt be there ;-(

but you also realize that wOw its been nearly four years since you saw seungkwan?? your best friend?? and crush????

sounds fake but ok

he lets you promise to pick him up in the airport and you tell him of course you’ll be there

fast forward to about a week later

youre at the airport bouncing on the heels of your foot waiting for seungkwan to come out of the arrivals gate

honestly, youre nervous as hell

you havent seen this man in 4 years!!! what if he just looks at you and decides he doesnt want to be your friend anymore?

shove that thought away hoe seungkwan is so loyal to you

your hands get clammy thinking about seeing him DESPITE YOU BEING IN L O V E WITH HIM

youre thinking to yourself ‘homygod this was a mistake i have to leave tAXI WHERE TF IS A TAXI’

but youre too late

because as soon as you know it, you feel a pair of arms wrap around you in a hug

you freeze for a second, finally feeling how fast and hard your heart was beating

“i missed you“

seungkwan’s voice sounded just like honey in your ears

he loosens up just enough for you to turn around and face him

OMG

HES GLOWING

first thing you noticed was that he got soooooo much taller since the last time you saw him

and more handsome as well

his cheeks though

they looked so full and squishy while he was smiling at you

legit me during diamond edge

his eyes crinkled because he was smiling so hard

you just stare at him longer than necessary and his smile gradually disappears and is replaced by a pout

“whats wrong?“

your eyes linger on his lips especially

without thinking

being the absent minded fool you are

you just

dove right in

and kissed him

it was a short peck on the lips, nothing special

just your whole heart exploding but whatever

you quickly pull away when you realized what the frick you just did

you pull yourself away from his arms, which went limp and simply fell beside him

you felt the tears in your eyes realising your mistake

you tried to apologize but

he pulls you back in his arms and just hugs you tightly

“i’ve been wanting to do that since middle school, but looks like you beat me to it“

i love seungkwan so much

[artterm]

2.18.20

yOoooo ok so first of all last night i was studying for my calc exam. Well it was around two in the morning and i was like uhhh hold up’ i feel deja vu. I pull up tumblr and i was like are u fr rn? This is my second time taking calc 1. Around the time of my first exam when taking calc 1 LAST semester I wrote on tumblr. I was struggling with a boy problem. Not boys. A boy. Anyways, i was stupid sad over this boy who didnt like me back anymore. So I was like no freakin way I’ve seriously liked this kid for this long???? 

Well now its four in the morning, I’m literally exhuasted and kinda wanna cry bc I have less than two hours to sleep. I closed my laptop and got into bed thinking cool I’ll get an hour of sleep all for studying for my calc exam, fml. Well now I’m thinking stupid hard about him. How his absence had an impact on me last semester. AND THEN, I started crying. I dont know why, I was just SO emotional. The last time I had cried bc of him was when he literally cut me off and said the words that honestly I may NEVER forget. ‘...I had to cut the shit off.’

So I’m sobbing at 4 am because for whatever reason the thought of why I wasn’t enough for him is floating around in my head and I’m wondering where it all went wrong. When I finally woke up for school around 6:30 in the morning I was dressing for my chem lab (I knew we’d be working with a stain so I didnt want to risk any cute clothes) so I wore some jeggings with two pairs of leggings under and ALL black jackets and hoodies. Pretty much I looked like shit. I was running on no-fucking-sleep and I as I stood there in the mirror in the morning I thought to myself, ‘lawd. Imagine if ***** saw you like this.” 

I wish I was joking. Cause thats how my day felt, like a fuckin’ joke.

First of all, APART from looking and feeling like shit when I went into the kitchen before leaving for school I thought ‘If anyone says the wrong fucking thing to me today i might cry.’ Even the mere thought of it caught me off guard. I looked up to the ceiling and bite back the tears. Not now. 

Whenever I make my walk to chem in the mornings I glance downtown wondering where you are and how you are. I hold onto the idea that maybe you sometimes wonder about me too. 

Back to my stupid ass story. So anyways, I have a break between chem and calc so I TRIED to study some more for calc and as I sat there I realized holy shit im so fucked because im tired af theres no way I’m going to be able to process anything during the exam.

And guess what happened. 

That exam 110% shitted on me. I was now at my PEAK level of sad, or so I thought (what a surprise right?). Before the exam I put my phone into my backpack. I didn’t even bother to take it out after that, because who the fuck is hitting MY line up anyway? 

Now my sappy ass is walking and im like yo whet the fuck. I either get out at 2:40 or go home around 4 when I stay doing homework after class, but today? First off I don’t even know what time it is and now i’m thinking why is there so many fuckinggggg people. I miss getting out of class at 12:30 pm. Fuck this shit. 

So I’m behind some people and the F line finally comes. I went to the side of the door so that other people could pass. As usual, you entered my thoughts. In my head I always wonder ‘what if...’

What if I saw you? I want to so badly but then again, last time i thought i saw you and i immediatly ran to a different door. It hadn’t been you that time, but this time, it was. 

I was glancing around looking for your face in the very back of the train when suddenly I saw a blue hoodie. ‘Theres no fucking way’ i thought. Then I looked at the boy’s face. He had his eyes closed and he looked very at peace. His head was leaning against the glass. Was he really sleeping? His hair was ruffled in the cutest way. 

oh god. oh fuck. I wanted to hide. I knew this is what I had wanted for so long because I’ve missed you but now that it was happening I wanted so badly to disappear. What if he saw me and didnt want to talk so he’s pretending to be asleep? Should I text you? Should I call you? fuckckckkck. 

I put my backpack down next to an older lady, ‘sorry’ ‘oh no don’t worry about it! That looks really heavy. You can sit here i’m about to get off’ ‘thank you so much!’ As I sat there i started freaking out. Should I say something? Maybe yell your name? no no you were awake by now and you had put your headphones in. You were looking out the window. What could you possibly be listening to? We were now at Yale Station and I knew that if i didnt say anything soon then that was it. I saw the empty seat next to you and I wish you knew how much I contemplated sitting next to you. I hadn’t realized how nervous you truly make me. I opened and closed the phone app around four times. I’m not going to call you. Ok fine yes I am. no no I’m not. uGH fuck ok. 

Even though there were people in the way I managed to get a peek at you when you realized your phone was ringing. You were confused, and then you pulled your phone out of your pocket. You looked up and your eyes met mine. For the first time in weeks I saw your smile.