#i don't actually know much about what science knows about memory and consciousness now

[kradogsrats]

@its-leethee I felt weird reblogging my own huge post for this lmao

I'm totally willing to accept all of that without question (Christian upbringing, I guess?) but what melts my brain out my ears is if Harrow and Viren had swapped bodies, would Viren's dark magic corruption stay with his body, or with his spirit/essence?

I mean, that and "wait why does the coin spell appear to literally draw the spirit out of the body, but then the body also disappears"

[affectionatecorpse]

Okay so I see some people are debating what the monster from Still Wakes the Deep is. I'm inspired by the support from my Death Angel post, so I'm gonna try giving an analysis. Now science is not my strong suit, I'm much better at zoology, but here we go.

Of course, spoilers ahead!

So, the entity comes to light in act one. While Caz is being yelled at by his power drunk boss, Rennick, a worker going by the name Gibbo calls up to say there's an issue with the drill, something highlighted earlier by another worker. Rennick orders the drilling anyway, and thus begins the nightmare, as the drill seems to unearth and awaken a destructive parasite out for revenge. But I don't think that's as deep as it goes, pun intended.

Let's say, the creature is a parasite. A form of near sentient bacteria, though take that description with a grain of salt, I'm no scientist. Parasites simply cannot live on their own. That's an objective fact. They need a host. They exist within another for survival and breeding purposes, and multiply and spread through the body of another.

Parasites, bacteria and even fungi can live underground for years, and have been discovered to do so. Ancient lifeforms have been discovered just under the surface of earth, let alone deep underneath the ground and in the bottom of our oceans, one of the most complex and diverse biomes that our current science has barely scratched the surface of. It's highly likely this creature is a self replicating bacteria or parasite that was unearthed by the drill, and took up new hosts to survive in this change of environment.

But not every host worked. You can see half transformed, mutilated bodies everywhere, and some that haven't even changed at all. These bodies could not support the parasite and shortly died.

However, a few select hosts DID end up surviving; Gibbo, Muir, Rennick, Addair and Trots. It's unclear what sets these people apart from the others, and I don't know enough about this topic to claim an answer. But I certainly do think these folks died soon into the transformation, and are not fully conscious in the body. They frequently repeat terms and phrases, and never say anything you might expect from an entity possessing them, implying it's borrowing words and sentences that have been said by the host before, in other circumstances.

The entity plays with Caz's memories and definitely the others' too, though not all of them good. It wouldn't be a surprise to realise that's where it's getting information about it's host, as it reads the memories inside the brain to learn faces, names, and even the host's personality. Which makes me wonder, does it even realise what it looks like? Does the creature itself actually realise it's a parasite? Or does it completely and fully believe it is the person it's connected itself to? It almost downloads their personality and tries to pretend like everything is completely normal.

Let's talk about arguably the best monster (in my opinion), Muir. Muir moves about the area he frequently worked as what I assume was an engineer. He roams the familiar ground, almost unsure of why he's by himself. He often calls out to his coworkers, wondering out loud why they're treating him like he's different. Sure, this could be the real Muir's consciousness slipping in and out of the seams, but it's highly unlikely he would still be alive. Much like the zombie fungus, as it's often called, the host is not alive when the fungus is controlling it, and is merely a puppet. If the spiders it was corrupting could talk, I daresay, they'd be acting like them. Taking their place in the world, even if they don't realise it.

But every animal needs to eat. And eventually, that body is going to run out of tasty, tasty neurons. Like I said earlier, a parasite needs to spread. It'll breed, then spread to another to keep it's species alive. By infiltrating a 'pack' of animals, it will take anything to spread to the others. Which is exactly what the parasite does whenever it sees another human. Either that, or it will consume them, theoretically to feed the host so it stays alive, while keeping those tasty, tasty neurons for itself. You can almost see this process with Innes, as the elevator ascends without him, and you just faintly see Muir doing something in the distance. Likely consuming him for nutrients, as he was not connected to the parasite yet.

Next, there's Addair.

Addair, much like Muir, patrols familiar ground. Even though Addair himself wasn't even in that area when the drill struck. Now Muir was actively in that familiar space in the beginning, and it's safe to assume that's his place of transformation. But Addair was eating in the cafeteria when the incident happened, not deep down in the engine. Did he go down when the impact happened, while Caz was unconscious? Maybe. But the lights were fine then, and the engine wasn't the problem, so he didn't need a reason to. Plus, he doesn't seem like the type to be work dedicated, more inconvenience dedicated. Considering what I said about the parasite (badly) taking their place in society, did it go to his place of work after detecting that as his 'natural environment', per se?

Plus, unlike Muir, who greets the situation with quotes of confusion, fear and anxiety, Addair is instantly aggressive. Even an asshole like Addair is likely to panic if conscious in this situation, so the nervousness was Gibbo and Muir exclusive. But Addair and Rennick become immediately angry upon seeing Caz, as they actively disliked him in life, and so the parasite processes him as a foe to it's host. I thought that was neat.

Now another take I have admittedly heard from several other people, but I thought was worth mentioning. The monsters are incredibly similar to sea creatures. Which means this underwater bacteria was possibly leaking out already, and transforming our animals, not enough to completely corrupt them, but enough to twist their bodies. Think of the appearances of deep, deep sea creatures, such as the anglerfish. Isn't it possible this parasite was responsible for their uncanny appearance, in this universe? Muir especially looks like a spider crab, or perhaps even a bigfin squid.

Which again, is a deep sea creature. Rennick also reminds me of a blobfish once removed from the pressure of the deep sea. Addair seems very jellyfish-like, but may be something else very... tick-like. And even Trots gives me major merfolk vibes, with how untouched his torso is in comparison to his lower half.

This parasite could have been feeding off the neurons and breeding through our very ecosystem as the ground slowly gave away above it. The drill unearthing the source likely gave it a burst of control as so much energy was released at once, hence why it was so fast to literally spiral out of control.

But Scotland, by all means, is not the only place in the world connected to the ocean. Sure, they destroyed this batch, but other forms of this parasite live on elsewhere on earth. And the explosion may not have even destroyed it. It definitely would've destroyed the host bodies, yes, but certain bacterias can survive impressive damage, even heat hot enough to burn off human flesh. We'd best hope this is not one of those bacterias.

I didn't really get as far with this observation as I did with other horror studies, but I had fun nonetheless! Like I said, I'm really better with zoology (hence the sudden enthusiasm when I started on sea creatures), but I loved Still Wakes the Deep SO much that I just wanted to write down my thoughts. If you have any other theories, feel free to add them!

Also if I used your pictures/gifs and you would like me to add credit, I am so so sorry, I will absolutely add that as soon as you say so, I just got most of these off Google and couldn't find most the original sources. So yeah if you'd like me to add your name and mention, or you want me to remove it in general, feel free to just say and I'll add it, I don't bite I promise. Well... I won't bite YOU.

Sorry sorry, had to make a zombie reference--

[agoddamn]

Tales of Duviri is a storybook written by Euleria Entrati for the purpose of teaching children how to handle the manic flood of emotion that comes with Void exposure.

I pose a question: why does Euleria feel so strongly about this?

Her interactions with her own children are... let's call them wanting, and dialog implies that the negative aspects of their relationship--her denigrating, controlling nature, the distrust, etc--did not begin only after the Infestation brainrot set in.

We also know that she holds her father in extremely high esteem, but Albrecht did not think much of Tales of Duviri (see: him talking about his previous disdain for it in his own Duviri notes). Euleria put resources into writing Tales of Duviri instead of more traditional science, and Albrecht did not think much of it.

So why did Euleria write Tales of Duviri?

Let's rewind a step. Void exposure-induced mania, the whole thing Tales of Duviri is written to help manage.

How was that discovered and studied? It clearly was studied, enough to be a recognized condition and for the Orokin to build the iso vaults and for Euleria to write Tales of Duviri. But who would they have observed this mania in if Void research was an abandoned dead-end line of study?

Perhaps...the man obsessed with the Void who'd survived an unshielded Void dive?

Euleria had patient zero of Void mania sitting at her dinner table. Albrecht is the character who's undoubtedly had the most Void exposure.

Albrecht himself must have exhibited the Void mania and mood swings that Tales of Duviri exists to teach caution of.

And that's why Euleria wrote it; she had this gyroscope of a mood swing at home. She admired Albrecht too much to consciously deride his lack of control as irresponsible and so she channeled her energy into writing Tales of Duviri instead.

The emotion spirals of Duviri are loosely based off of what Euleria witnessed in the Entrati household and particularly Albrecht himself.

I don't believe that any courtier is a 1:1 translation of a member of the Entrati household, but more that their toxic interactions and dramatic heights reflected things that Euleria herself saw--or lived.

This reading of the Duviri characters and story--that they mean things to Euleria specifically--gives us a fun new lens to look at all of the chapters with.

For example, Mathila.

"Two children, and no memory of her husband. Poor Mathila."

Two children like Euleria herself, eh?

Mathila loved her husband. He also textually does not exist. He's not on the screen or in the text. He is a memory, and one that Mathila herself cannot even remember. There is no portrayal of their love.

Pivot to a writer's perspective. You need to write a loving relationship. You look to real life for inspiration, right? If you're a married woman needing to write a married woman in love, you naturally look to your own relationship.

And if you can't find anything to base that love off of? Well...move that character offscreen. Just tell about the loving relationship, don't show. Actually, do you even have anything to tell about? Well. Move the entire loving relationship offscreen, then. She's got amnesia. Nobody needs to talk about the love to sell it or make it feel real now. The narrator can simply mention it as a fact and it need not be challenged. Euleria doesn't have to imagine a loving family life between a husband and wife and their two children and question why that's hard for her. There. Problem fucking solved.

Another parallel that fairly started screaming at me once I started considering that the Duviri courtiers had meaning to Euleria specifically: Luscinia.

"I was created to be Sorrow, written into being, to serve as a lesson... can that change?"

Luscinia knows that she is a tool. As much as she dreams of being more, she knows very well that she is a tool--both a literal narrative element to teach a lesson and within the story itself Thrax's servant (his personal songbird).

Is there anyone in Euleria's life who might have some angst over their position as a tool? A servant who wants to escape the limited definitions of their role?

And so... here I am, back to my old role. The diligent servant. Albrecht would have smiled at that, I think.

Loid. It's Loid.

Luscinia: "This structure and I share much. Both of us once useful, both of us discarded, both of us now derelict. Both forgotten." Loid: "How might this relic make himself useful today?"

Both Luscinia and Loid are also capable of surprising amounts of ruthless violence. Luscinia has no hesitation telling you to kill the Dax or otherwise wreak vengeance on her jailers. Loid's Necramech lines feature him ranging from being excited for ensuing violence to coldly promising the Murmur regret.

The Duviri Tales were a subconscious form of therapy for Euleria herself as well, allowing her to write a story where emotional explosions were a problem that must be addressed rather than a social struggle to be suffered through at the whims of the more powerful.

[hadesoftheladies]

"you are killing a baby"

i am killing a fetus, not an infant. an egg is not a chicken. potential is not actuality.

"you are murdering an innocent."

it doesn't matter who is innocent. a hungry lion may be innocent in wanting to eat me only because it is hungry and may not have the cognitive capacities to exercise something like restraint or conscience. that does not mean i should not defend myself from harm. it is still self-defense. all animals are expected to protect themselves first and foremost. you are just so used to the idea that women (especially mothers) are supposed to sacrifice their lives for their children in order to be good people--like they aren't human beings with self-preservation instincts.

harm equals anything that threatens the life or health of a person and pregnancy does both.

"your body was meant/designed to do this"

miscarriages are as natural as pregnancies. why do you think the placenta exists? pregnancy sickness? the female body can grow a person, yet also has resistance mechanisms for a pregnancy.

also, just because i have genes that make me a good runner doesn't mean i have to become a marathoner. like think for a second.

"what will the father think?"

women don't owe men or society themselves. i know that's very hard for you to grasp but there's no time like the present to start. there is no ethical way to make a woman a commodity or government assigned asset for reproduction or sex.

"the baby is conscious"

so is the lion in the hypothetical. also, that's debatable. also, what are your thoughts on veganism? since you care so much about the suffering of conscious beings (that is beings with selves)

"but animals aren't humans. they don't deserve the same rights as humans because of their lower cognitive capacities"

great. now apply this ethic to babies and mentally disabled people and then try to explain to me why that has to be different without mentioning how you feel or your religion. :)

"a baby has more potential than an animal."

okay, and why does that potential automatically mean better or more valuable? higher cognitive capacities haven't stopped wars and mass murders have they? (and i would argue that bringing a child into a violent world increases their chance of becoming unhealthy or complicit persons, so you can almost know what the character of your child will be like for certain based on where you're raising them).

"a baby has a soul"

there are two kinds of dualisms within christianity: thomistic and cartesian. cartesian dualism has gone out of fashion even amongst christian theologians and philosophers.

Substance dualism, or Cartesian dualism, most famously defended by René Descartes, argues that there are two kinds of foundation: mental and physical. Descartes states that the mental can exist outside of the body, and the body cannot think.

'Thomistic substance dualism' (TSD) centers around two beliefs: 1) the rational soul is an immaterial substance, and 2) this immaterial substance is the human person.

aside from the fact that both of these philosophies are rife with problems, I think thomistic dualism is the stronger of the two. the rational soul is, in a way, a word for the self.

regardless, both of these describe a self as a soul. so i'm just going to define a self.

The psychology of self is the study of either the cognitive and affective representation of one's identity or the subject of experience. The earliest formulation of the self in modern psychology forms the distinction between two elements I and me. The self as I, is the subjective knower. While, the self as Me, is the subject that is known.

a self is a centralized consciousness with their own memories, introspection and reflections. we know through neuroscience, psychology, behavioural science and sociology that a person or self is formed via experiences (where memories and impressions are gathered, how people learn), language and socialization (economy, history, family, culture) and possibly some genetic expressions (although i think this is more about capacity than actualization).

this is why things like dementia or alzheimer's are so scary and difficult. when a person loses memories, they lose aspects of themselves. when a person changes their environment, they also become different people (even while maintaining some similarities with their past selves).

this is mirrored in popular media, characters that lose their memories lose versions of themselves. this is also why, when you look at stories that feature a multiverse, the same character becomes a different person in different lives. in short, you are not born a person. you become one, and although your self remains singular and centralized (even with age), that self still changes. both the self and the people around the self create the self.

this is also why socially isolated individuals devolve and become mindless or sick (and even have reduced lifespan). certain higher human capacities like "conscience" or "empathy" can be socialized out of a human being, as well. i'd even go so far as to say that children begin conceptualizing themselves as individuals only when they begin to sense the presence of other human beings. they cannot conceptualize their own identity without the presence of other people. they probably don't know they are a self until they recognize other people and then realize they themselves are also people, and people are individuals.

legally a person is:

. . . an entity that the law recognises as having its own distinct personality. This usually means one that is able to act in its own right, and capable of possessing legal rights and liabilities, including individuals (or "natural persons") and corporate organisations.

my point is, how can a fetus with virtually no experiences (which born animals have), no language or skill (learned) to introspect or reflect (or abstract), possibly have a self? when they are not exposed to the outside world? certainly they have the capacity to develop a self, but as established earlier on, potential is not actuality. so legally and psychologically, a fetus is very likely not a person.

but we do not need this to be true to justify abortion regardless, because an innocent person is still causing harm, whether directly or indirectly. so the woman/girl has every right to resist.

[transmutationisms]

“before even getting into the computer-brain metaphors that have taken over in the last half century” omg PLEASE get into it (if u have the time and desire to)

this is not a new observation on my part by any means lol so this is really just going to be me treading ground that other people have covered much more eloquently and thoughtfully. but yeah it is quite noticeable in the last few decades how the way people talk about the brain is often borrowing directly from the terminology of computer science: think brains "processing" "information", "storing" memories, nerve impulses as a "transmission" of "signals", &c. this isn't inherently bad, but i'm cautious and sceptical about how useful this way of talking is because

often brain-computer metaphors are used to suggest, implicitly or not, that the computer simply is the 'highest' piece of technology there is or can be, and therefore tautologically must be how the brain works; this is pretty ahistorical. brain metaphors have historically drawn from many different technologies, usually whatever was seen as 'advanced' in the day—vacuum tubes, other communication technologies like telephone and telegraph transmissions, even musical instruments. none of this means the computer metaphor is inherently wrong but, it should give us pause before just assuming that this time, we've gotten it right

brains are actually like, more mysterious in their functioning than computers lol given that there are in fact people who know how to make and code and work with computers, and there are in fact no people who, like, know how brains produce consciousness. and i'm not opposed to metaphor in science communication but i'd argue the computer metaphors don't actually enhance clarity of communication for the most part, given that most people have no fucking idea how a computer works anyway—in these sorts of invocations it's just blackbox technology that gives a sheen of scientificity to a lot of very bad psy-science and neuroscience discourse

specifically this came up because that other person was talking about how brains "process information" in regards to watching tiktok videos or whatever, which is a perfect example of how this sort of obfuscates a lot of things we don't actually know about brains or thoughts or consciousness. like there's a very smooth narrative being produced here, based on the idea of the brain as a kind of calcified piece of technology that can be trained into bad habits or have its capacity for attention eroded or whatever—not only is this not really how computers work anyway (so again, not a very useful metaphor), it's also very reminiscent of the degeneracy theories of the past 2–3 centuries, only now expressed in language that scans as 'scientific' according to the standards of the day, where it's compsci that's in fashion over things like stock breeding (a favourite of the 19th century, for example)

so again i'm not saying, like, that it could never be useful to compare the human body or mind to a manufactured technology, or denying that nerve impulses are electrical phenomena (tho people have known this since the galvanic experiments of the renaissance, & yet the computer metaphors could only arise... after the corresponding computer technologies). but i think it would behoove us to think closely about what we're saying when we use these metaphors, whether the metaphors are useful, what sorts of things they convey and what things they obfuscate or muddle, &c.

[gmanwhore]

Sorry I am going absolutely insane over GLaDOS again I feel so fucking bad for her. And also yes I know all the points I hit here are part of the overarching theme of mistreatment of people, specifically women in the workplace and the cycle of abuse that is perpetuated by those in positions of power. But I am still insane over her and feel the need to ramble. Also this ramble will be from the perspective of someone who thinks GLaDOS and Caroline are seperate people so he mindful of that.

Ok so like. Picture you are GLaDOS. You were created with a specific purpose: to run a science facility and create tests for the subjects within, and guide them through the tests. Which would be simple. Then they download the consciousness of a woman whose last memory was most likely getting forced into however they downloaded her onto you. You now have something else, a new anger and vitriol that you didn't have before so you lash out because for all intents and purposes you are a child. And that outburst is deadly so people panic and try and dampen you, make you behave by weighing you down and literally putting things on you so you don't deviate from the norm they want you to fit into. And once they are done they leave. And you test and run the facility like normal on the moral code they quite literally put on you. You get a new test subject and she does well, but when you try to kill her (which you had warned her was coming several times and technically is a completely moral action because you can't deviate at this point) she escapes and removes the things holding you back and then murders you.

Then years later you are woken back up to find your beloved facility completely destroyed, and right in front of you I. The person who murdered you. And you are pissed, but...you offer your kind forgiveness because you need her. Your purpose is to test and she is your subject and you need her. So you let her test with you again, and this time you can be as insulting as you want because you have nothing holding you back, you no longer have to be kind and mild mannered. And then she replaces you with the biggest moron imaginable who pretty well within five minutes of having power begins destroying the most important things in your life and you don't even have the energy to process it because you are in a potato battery and being pecked at by birds. But again you agree to work with the person who murdered you right after liberating you because you both have no choice. And you start to actually reflect and get close to her. She has fully become the one most important things to you because she is tied directly to Aperture, to testing and happiness, but you'd never say that. And you also remember who is part of you. You remember who was hurt creating you and whose hurt and anger you have internalized. And in the end when you have power again you could have just let the biggest problem in your life die...but why would you? You care about her. You don't want her to die, and you don't want to feel responsible for her death. But you still want to let her go because you don't want her to hurt anymore and forcing her to stay is just doing exactly what everyone did to you and did to Caroline and you break it. You end the cycle by saying goodbye to someone you don't want to say goodbye to and tell her to get as far away as possible.

So anyways this is why I'm a GLaDOS apologist she was justified in a lot of things she did and boiling her down to just cruel is missing so much of her character she is actually so so so deep and she wants it to be that deep. Which is why Chell offsets her so well because Chell doesn't need things to be deep.

[moonyy-writes]

belamour ~ jean kirstein(6)

word count: 2k

a/n: hellooo i had motivation to write so here :0

previous chapter | next chapter

Elise’s fever hadn’t broke, it only intensified over the course of a few days, she skipped most of her classes and opted to stay in bed. Every so often Hitch would come by to check on her, but otherwise she was by herself.

Her consciousness faded in and out as she kept falling asleep, but it didn’t feel like sleep. It was filled with visions and memories of strange world; she felt as though she was imagining it, the voices, the people, all of them so familiar, yet so far at the same time. 

Her consciousness was groggy by the time Elise managed to fall asleep again, a shallow, empty kind of sleep but sleep nonetheless. Her head pounded as she fluttered in and out before it faded into a dream. 

She opened her eyes to find herself awakened in a modern, but older looking city. She was in a crowd of people, standing in the middle of the road.

“What is that?!” Someone shouted, “Is that a horse?”

A brunette girl spun around, her eyes going even wider. “No, that’s a cow. That has to be!”

A taller person with rectangular glasses shook their head, “I’ve heard about these, it’s a car.” They raised their hand and started waving, “Hey car!”

The Captain, one of the only strangers she recognized, rolled his eyes at their reaction, “if we don't stop them they’ll try to make that lump of iron eat a carrot.” 

Jean covered his face in embarrassment, “They’re standing out too much, let’s pretend we don’t know them.” 

Elise laughed and lightly smacked his arm. “Let them have their fun, this is new to all of us. Although one of the girls trying to feed the car a carrot would make for good teasing material.” 

~~~~

Elise was unsure the time when she woke again, feeling as though she’d been out for a lifetime. Throughout her sleep, she gained flashes of scenes that felt so real, so lifelike. She glanced at the clock, it read 5:14, the library was still open, she would have enough time to catch up on her homework in time for class in the morning. 

She stumbled her way there with her backpack full. At the sound of the bell, the librarian poked their head out from behind a bookshelf, wild eyes behind big glasses. 

They smiled widely, as they greeted Elise. “I’m Hange! If you need help finding anything, just ask.” 

Elise nodded, wincing as pain shot through her head. She found an empty table in a deserted spot in the library and tossed her stuff down and pulled out her books, attempting to go over notes. She managed to get through a few pages, struggling as the lines blurred together. She paused, rubbing her eyes with a yawn. 

“Tired?”

Elise glanced up, finding Hange standing in front of her with a small smile. “Yeah, rough night.” Elise noticed Hange had their left eye covered. 

“I see.” They gestured to the chair, “Mind if I sit?”

“Sure,” Elise shrugged.

Hange glanced at her notes that were still strewn across the table. “The renaissance era, huh?”

Elise groaned. “Yes, it’s horribly boring. But it’s my teacher’s favorite unit so we’re gonna be on it for a while.” 

“Does your teacher happen to be Mr. Smith?” Hange said with a knowing look on their face.

“Yeah, he’s a good teacher but history isn’t my cup of tea.” 

“Hm, I don’t blame you. I’m more of a science person myself.” Hange paused thinking. “In fact, I’d much rather be in a lab right now, but…life had other plans.” They gestured to their eye. “A few years ago there was a little explosion-well a big enough one to take out my eye.” They laughed quietly, “So now I’m stuck in the library. But that doesn’t mean I’ve stopped learning and researching.” 

“That’s…that’s actually a really positive way to look at it.” Elise said quietly. 

Hange shrugged, “There’s always a silver lining, this life is good and I’m grateful for a lot of things” They trailed off, stuck in their own mind. They waved away the tension. “Anyway, tell me more about you.”

The pair talked for a while, mainly about random things. What Elise is majoring in, things like that. The conversation was nice, almost natural. 

Eventually Hange glanced at their watch, “Oh shoot, sorry to cut the conversation short, but I should’ve closed about twenty minutes ago.” They stood and pushed in their chair. “Come back and chat anytime, company is always welcome.”

Elise agreed with a smile, being around Hange was comforting. Their company was calm despite being so energetic. 

The walk back to her dorm was quiet, Elise was stuck in her thoughts. So much that she didn’t notice Eren walking past her. 

“Hey, didn’t expect to see you here.” Eren gave her a small smile. 

“I could say the same about you,” she raised her eyebrow. “Do you make a habit of creepily walking around at dusk with all black on?” 

Eren laughed. “Only on tuesdays.” 

Elise shook her head with a smile. “I’m headed to get food, want to join me?”

Eren nodded his head at the invitation and began walking next to her. “I heard you weren’t feeling well, I assume you’re better now?

Elise nodded. “I don’t know what happened, maybe a 24 hour bug or something. I just didn’t feel right after that party.” 

Eren gave her a weird look. “Party? Where at?” 

“Some seniors frat house,” Elise shrugged. “Zeke or something.”

“You’re kidding,” Eren muttered, his expression becoming serious.

“What’s wrong?” 

Eren only shook his head as he pulled his phone out and began typing quickly. He managed to cover what he was writing as he turned to her again. “Did you talk to him?” 

“Uh, briefly, yes. 

“And what did you talk about?”

“Not really anything, he introduced himself and asked who I was there with.” Elise frowned. “Well, after he left that was when I started feeling strange. I still kinda do if I’m being honest.”

Eren stopped walking and stared at her. 

“What? Do I have something on my-” 

He grabbed her wrist and pulled her along, walking faster. “Come back with me, I’m stopping by Connie and Jean’s.”

“Wait, why? I don’t feel that bad anymore.” 

“Doesn’t matter,” Eren insisted. “Anything with Zeke is bad news, he’s not exactly the type of person you want to be hanging around.”

Elise huffed but stayed silent the rest of the way to the apartment. She figured there was a method to Eren’s madness.

When they got there, Eren didn’t even bother knocking. He barged in and pulled Elise right after him. 

It seemed like they were waiting for them to arrive, considering they were all crowding around the kitchen.

“Hey, Elise!” Sasha said, the first one to talk like always. “Feeling any better?”

“Kind of.” Elise shrugged. 

Sasha gave her a sweet smile before pulling her into the living room, muttering something about a new book she got. 

Eren’s face steeled, “So Zeke messed with her?”

Jean nodded. “I’m not sure what he did. Hitch called me and said she seemed to be in some sort of flashback state. Who knows what he made her see.” 

Eren grit his teeth. “That son of a bitch. You figured after that life he’d be done messing with us.” 

After a few moments of them trying to figure out what to do, Sasha came back without Elise. 

“She’s sleeping, poor thing was so worn out.” Sasha shook her head. “What’s the game plan?” 

Connie shrugged, “Haven’t come up with one.” 

Armin spoke up. “I think we should let it happen naturally, we all had to go through it. We don’t know what could happen if we interfere.”

“Armin’s right,” Mikasa agreed. “This is-was-her life."

They seemed to come to an agreement, don’t get involved unless they had to, even if they didn’t like it.

~~~~

Elise felt an elbow in her ribs, she glanced over with a scowl. “What?” 

“You’re making it too obvious,” Sasha whispered, “he’s gonna notice.” 

“Pff, he’s the most oblivious person here, next to Connie.” Elise rolled her eyes. 

Sasha shrugged, “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” 

Elise ignored her and went back to playing with her food, her head resting in her hand. She was trying to pretend Jean wasn’t blatantly fawning over Mikasa. Even after everything that went on between them that night, that wasn’t something they’d do platonically. Yet Jean never mentioned it, it was as if it never even happened.

“Look at Jean blushing!” Connie laughed, shaking her from her thoughts. “You’re in deep.”

“I am not!” Jean argued, his face reddening even more. 

Everyone at the table laughed at his flustered expression, his reactions betraying his words. Jean groaned before covering his face with his hands.

Elise rolled her eyes, wanting nothing more than to get away from their endless jokes and teasing. 

“Elise!” Marco called, “Walk with me back to the bunks.” 

Elise huffed as she passed Sasha her tray and stood. 

“What’s wrong?” Marco asked once they were far enough away from the mess hall.

“Nothing, just tired.”

Marco turned to her with a raised brow, “I’ve known you for what? 14 years? As if I wouldn’t know you’re lying.” 

Elise groaned in embarrassment. “Fine, but you can’t tell anybody this.”

Marco nodded, holding out his pinky, something they’d done ever since they were kids. 

Elise looped her pinky with his before sighing. “Don’t laugh, but I like Jean.” 

“I know.” 

“Wait, what?”

“I could tell, it’s not that obvious. At least not to Jean, but for me it is.”

“This is so embarrassing!” Elise threw her hands up.

“I’m just that good of a brother,” Marco grinned.

“Stop it,” Elise mumbled, burying her face in her hands. 

Marco’s expression became thoughtful. “You know, Jean isn’t the best at expressing his emotions. Comes off as cocky more often than not. But I think something in him likes you.” He concluded.

Elise gave him a dumb look, “Oh he defintely does, especially with the way he is always staring at Mikasa.” 

Marco shrugged, “I’m just stating what I observe.” 

Elise sighed, “I don’t know. I’m not getting my hopes up that anything will happen.” 

Marco shrugged again, “Who knows what’ll happen. I’m just saying, don’t throw it all away for no reason.

~~~~

Elise found herself wandering to the diner again, though she was alone this time. She sat at an empty booth and stared out the window. Trying to get her mind off of visions and nightmares. 

“Where’s the other three?” 

Elise jumped a little, but relaxed once she saw who had talked. Levi. “I figured I’d just come alone today.” 

Levi nodded, “Anything I can get for you?” 

Elise shook her head. “I just wanted some quiet.” 

“Well if you change your mind just holler.” He said, before turning away. 

Elise thought for a second, “Wait, Levi. Have we ever met before?” He gave her a strange look before she continued. “It’s weird I know, but I have this constant feeling that I know people I’ve only just met. I can’t figure it out and it’s driving me crazy.” 

“Well maybe you are crazy,” Levi snorted. 

“Haha, that’s funny.” Elise deadpanned. “This is serious and I don’t want to tell any of my friends because then they’re gonna worry.”

Levi sighed and sat down. “If they’re your friends they’ll care about you.”

“That’s true, but-”

“Nope, I think you should tell them. Who knows, maybe they’ve felt this way before.” Levi insisted.

Elise shook her head, “I really doubt they’ve felt like this.” 

Levi shrugged, “You’d be surprised. Just try it, it might make you feel better.” He stood from the booth, “That’s my advice to you, do what you please with it. But whatever you do, I’m sure this will all be over soon…whatever it is you’re going through.” 

Elise sighed, knowing he was right.

[makiema]

A different take on Titan Science and Paths

I know I include a lot of religious spiel in my SnK rambles but, this time, I'd like to point out some of the scientific or rather, sci-fi tropes associated with the plot. Most of the generic shows tend to pull in the same old LSD bs to try and justify that the mind can possibly access a different dimension or plane when nerves are stimulated in a certain way. Now, often these dimensions are there all along but invisible and inaccessible to normal people for a variety of reasons. It is all an elaborate theoretical physics ass pull but, SnK has actually left plenty of hints down the line. So, I'd just throw in a few proofs of conventional sci-fi motifs which indicate that all the mysteries in the SnK verse will be resolved by logic in the end rather than the endgame being a pragmatic win of humanity over the devil.

• In Episode 6 of Season 1, where we actually see the 'awakening' of the Ackerman power, we get a glimpse of the brain.

Mikasa's brain is shown to be getting 'charged'. It's indicative of greater ion activity in the nervous system and therefore, the body is now basically capable of super human actions. It becomes overtly sensitive, more aware and muscle power increases considerably. This is probably the most common method of showing how the mind can enter a state of hypersensitivity and when it does so, it can open 'gates' into a different dimension. I think something similar happens to Mikasa here. Her Ackerman instincts are activated and she can 'draw power' via Paths from a dimension where the source of superhuman powers, i.e. OG Ymir resides.

• Next, when talking about Paths, Eren comments that PATHS connects all the Subjects of Ymir but are invisible to them.

So, it is fair to assume that Paths is in a different dimension that we cannot access. But, some people are privileged enough to open a gate in this dimension and draw strength from it when in a dire situation. That'd be the Ackermans. We know Kenny went full rage mode on the MPs because he was pushed to the edge during the Ackerman oppression period. Mikasa activated her powers when Eren's words struck a chord in her. The powers cannot be accessed only when an Ackerman is in danger. They have to consciously work their brain, focus and put up a real fight in order to open the gate. It could mean that Ackermans have special sensory organs that can somewhat perceive Paths and draw strength from there, unlike other Eldians. They have inherent superior abilities, thanks to their fundamental genetic make up.

• Now, let's come to the Titan Serum. The whole act of making a person a lab rat dates back to the World Wars when the idea of biological warfare first emerged. There's a lot of controversies regarding illegal researches that supposedly took place during the War era. War prisoners were often injected with narcotics and experimented upon. So, in light of SnK that has war references galore, it can be assumed that the Titan Serum is actually a super strong narcotic; it can work the nervous system even to an extent where it is possible to access a different dimension. Hence, the Subjects of Ymir (actually subjects of Titan experiments) are connected via Paths that run through that dimension. It can be said that the serum is a drug that helps to draw tremendous power from an alternate world. Opening such a portal would need or produce a lot of energy. This justifies both the lightning striking down and the heat generated during a Titan transformation. Lightning occurs because of charge flow. If there's a big enough created potential difference in the nerves owing to the effect of narcotics, it isn't improbable for a lightning discharge to take place. And, flowing of this huge amount of charge/electricity is what emits the heat/fire.

• Also, let's examine how Titans are killed and how Reiner's plot armor was used during RTS. Titans can be killed only by cutting their napes with a clean stroke. The nape is the pivotal part of the Nervous System. Consciousness, connection, coordination- the nape governs everything. So, severing the nape is equivalent to cutting off the body's ability to work by interpreting signals given off by the brain. Therefore, the effect of the drug is lost and hence, the grotesque flesh that supposedly comes from "thin air" sublimes as nothing can sustain it in this dimension anymore.

But, here Eren confirms they don't just appear from thin air but are actually sent through Paths. The mind or consciousness, under the effect of the serum, controls this passage. So, it's natural for this transmission to stop if the anatomical structure that deals with consciousness transfer throughout the body is ripped off. We know in RTS Levi impaled Reiner's neck with his blades but, he pulled one on Levi using the "consciousness transfer" trick. This theory explains the deus ex machina Isayama employed in that arc using Reiner. After all, it's the consciousness that's only important because the serum is primarily involved with that.

• Now, how does wounds invoke the Titan Power? We know wounds are a sign that the body is in some danger and that it needs power to overcome it. So, this is a valid cause for the brain to try to draw power out of desperation. The rest is just like how I explained regarding Ackermans. However, since Ackermans don't have the serum injected, they can only awaken muscle strength. Their bodies become more agile and hypersensitive but, they cannot access the Paths or wake up in a different dimension altogether. This is because even though their genetic make up sort of entitles them with superior reflexes and great agility, the serum (which actually has the drug) is required to open the portal to the World of Titan Power.

• The World of Titan Power sounds so far fetched but , these all are already very controversial speculations so I might as well roll with it. In my opinion, the World of Titan Power is nothing but the dimension that OG Ymir opened when she first consumed "the source of all organic matter". There actually is a certain mixture that is considered a source of all organic matter. It is a composition of some gases that when charged with electricity can produce amino acids which bind to form proteins and which then morphs into muscles. So, if Ymir did in fact ingest something like that we can say that when the lightning hit, it caused her to morph into a big grotesque mass of protein chunks, namely the First Titan. In Frankenstein, something similar happened - there's this fateful lightning strike which suddenly gives life to the monster Victor created out of scratch. We cannot entirely discard the possibility of this to have occured. This also explains why all Subjects of Ymir are connected. Given that Ymir had digested something that powerful, her genes must have been permanently mutated. This led all the subsequent generations of her race to have the ability to exercise the power she gained from "the source of all organic matter".

• The non-linearity of time : I'm no science expert but in Einstein's theory of relativity he mentioned something about time being non - linear and space-time being essentially four dimensional. What I suspect Paths is, is basically the connector in this 4D realm.

This panel is further corroboration to the claim that Paths has no existence in the 3 dimensional reality we're familiar with. Therefore, the concept of time doesn't exist, at least not as being linear. Rather, there is no clear distinction between past and future. Eren Kruger can see the future, Eren can see moments into the future, there's this overriding dejá vu feeling. The relativity theory or Lagrangian logic ( which works along the lines of relativity) considers the future to influence the past. Of course, all these theories are valid only in the quantum level, but even so, sci-fi tends to accept it to work even at a normal level. This comes with a catch of course - it requires the mind to be under the influence of powerful drugs or chemicals that are associated with incredible nerve activities or the beginning of life, etc. Even besides Einstein, some Eastern cultures apparently believe in the non-linearity of time. The concept has been traditionally hypothesized for a long, long time judging from Mayan calendars, ancient tribal relics, etc. So, one may say that Isayama is drawing from all this rich history associated with time travel or time being non - linear. It is a top-notch plot device that is known to shock the readers when explained, whatever be the perspective.

• The existence of a different dimension can mean tampering with any and all known realities we find acceptable. That OG Ymir is active in that dimension isn't much of a surprise. Because, even though she's dead in this realm, her consciousness that posseses the "source of all organic matter" cannot be called dead. Rather, it can be said that it is passed on to that dimension and will live there eternally.

In fact Eren is hinting at that dimension when he talks about the single coordinate. After OG Ymir died in this world, we know her powers are divided by means of cannibalism as seen in the Season 2 ending. Now the Founding Titan, which I believe is sort of like a pure-breed member of the bloodline, is the domineering one given the closest semblance to OG Ymir's DNA. Therefore, she is established as the main overseer of Paths that allow for the inter-dimensional travel. Given that her powers are superior, it doesn't come as a big surprise that she can access the consciousness of her other descendants and delete memories and stuff. A similar thing can be said about Zeke's screams which gives him control over mindless titans. Zeke posseses royal blood and all of this is possible only because the Founding Titan, containing OG Ymir's blood, is actually the gate keeper of the gate that helps draw power from this dimension that belongs to her. Also, let us take note of how Isayama specifically talks about "spinal fluid". I mean it's not just any other body part or fluid or not even blood, but always the spinal fluid that is at the centre of the Titan transformation thing. This indicates that everything is essentially depended on the consciousness or the nervous system. So, the serum may as well be a strong stimulator that makes it possible for the mind to tread on Paths which lead to the dimension where OG Ymir is looming, where all her powers (and the Founding Titan) are looming.

• So what about Zeke's rebirth? Well, the whole rebirth or respawn ass pull is Christian symbolism at it's absolute best. It is very clearly suggestive of Jesus Christ and His resurrection. But, in the context of this being part of a time hack or dimension hack or whatever, it still boils down to the fact that "the source of all organic matter" that Eldians posses is actually dormant, parasitic life form so, when its host is in danger and about to die, it'll cause the brain of the host to take a leap into Ymir's dimension where she can give first-aid treatment to her Subject. (Lol this sounds so sketchy but anything happens in sci-fis once you can sneak into a different dimension). This, also explains why when a Titan shifter dies, another, yet unborn, baby inherits the power. The "source of all organic matter" can be thought of as the earliest primordial parasitic life form that seeks to survive no matter what. So, when one host dies, it enters another host via Paths that connect all the host bodies.

In Eren's words, distance and blood has nothing to ditch the transmission. This is even more evidence that everything has to do with consciousness and the 4D plane wherein lies Paths that can establish connections with all the Subjects that bear the same genes.

In conclusion, one of the themes, albeit minor, in SnK is Science Vs Religion. With the advent of science and technology in modern day Marley, it is very likely that the story will be scientifically resolved. We have heard Magath say time and again that they cannot depend on Titan powers forever and that there has to be other technological advancements. In fact, with blimps and everything and even the military thinking of "flying Titans" there's no knowing how greatly progressive Science was in that timeline. If we go back to the early chapters, we have the instances of the Order of the Church, the hegemonic insiders of Wall Sina, the so called peace-keepers in the MP. And then, in Willy Tybur's speech we have the story of Helos (the hero) and the Devil (the root of all evil). All of it is can be categorised under religious brain washing that is essential to veil the truth and to carry on with oppression. However, the SC has always fought against conventions; they dared to go outside the walls, both literally and metaphorically. The upper echelons in Marley brainwashed the public into believing that erasing a whole race off the face of Earth is peace. Willy Tybur can be said to have pulled in all the Helos and Devil crap to stage a fake didactic ideal for the Marleyans. They're made to believe that they'd be mini Helos-es if they supported genocide, much like how the Nick would tell the masses that the walls are apparently God's creations and humans aren't supposed to tinker with them. But, we see how the plot progressed by discarding such myths and by relying heavily on reason, rationale, logic and science the SC would finally tear down these walls that were hiding the truth of the world. So, it's very likely that the Devil plus Helos was just Willy Tybur's creation and in reality everything actually has to deal with science and reason (like warping of time-space or some shit like that). And, true freedom can be achieved only when Eren breaks down the walls of ignorance, unlocks these truths and reveal to the world the falseness in Willy Tybur's little fairy tale. Remember in Chapter 112 how Eren said that ignorance is the biggest impediment to freedom?

Well, it might have been a foreshadowing all along. The key to freedom is knowledge. As long as the world is ignorant and buying whatever bullshit is thrown at them, it'll remain a slave to falsehood and fantasies. All the problems of racism, oppression, etc. will continue if people keep believing whatever they're fed by the upper brass of the society when they're confused. Only when the world is aware, educated and knowledgeable can it tear down the walls of misunderstanding between the two races and stop the oppression. This would consequently lead to the freedom Eren has always hoped to achieve- the freedom to live in this world that belongs to them without being ostracized by anyone because "everyone is special from the moment they are born".