#i feel like i woke up my parents but they aint checking up on me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

olde-scratch · 4 years

Text

So I watched LUCIDS 1-4 without any prior knowledge...

and here were my thoughts. I didn’t watch any backstory or anything so enjoy my suffering.

PART 1

“So what happens when the people inside of their dreams go to sleep?” They die

“What happens when we wake up? Do they go on living while we’re not there?” THEY DIE-

“Who are they anyway?” they’re faces that our brain catalogs and stores for later use, although it’s also arguable that every time we dream we go to an alternate reality and inhabit the body of another version of ourselves. Now, were you in a car accident and trapped underwater or-

Are they twins?

(Me tuning out to do something)

“-the squirrel in spongebob was your soulmate, making you a Sandy simp-”

Me, snapping back to the video: hold up-

[missed the part about the worksheet, realized it when i rewatched 10 mins later to make this post]

yall speakin gibberish idk what youre saying-

“I’m gonna go to bed.” bro it literally looks like morning-

“You should get some sleep you look terrible.” i get six hours of sleep a night minimum and i look worse than him shut up bro-

“jump into someone else’s dream” ah i know this con-

why they all got the same face-

haha funni meme

“--an interruptiion can create feedback and tear them apart.” Death. I long for thee.

Is that Karl Jacob’s jacket?

“a second grader” makes me think this is a different school system. [i was wrong? i think?]

“[get him to] eat your apple”

[in the dream sequence] weird dream, but ive had weirder. now, Why Pamper’s-

why does he suddenly have a knife-

“You put a filter on the Dreamscape feed?”

“Technically, you are seven years old.”

???????????

the second hand embarrassment is UGGGHHH

[reading the description] you mean like the guy who was knocked out for 2 minutes on a football field and woke to find he’d dreamt 17 years of his life? oh this shall be Fun

PART 2

[I check the description] “jasper cult” what the fu-

how many camp camp references can i make during this

Is the apple a reference to religion or does the creator just really ilke apples?

“meal.”

“meal?”

meal????

Wait why couldn’t that guy eat the apple? If he wanted it in the fruit bowl, wouldn’t there be a chance of the guy eating it anyways?? Why can’t the guy who brought the apple eat it?

well he’s Dead

[debating if I should read the backstory}

n a h h h h h -

Was he gonna feed the dead guy the apple or something? Why is he upset about the apple in this scene???

oooo the grownups are fightinnnngggg

Is he an antagonist?

HE WROTE A BOOK???

oh now i want food

ESTABLISH JUSTICE ENSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITYYYYYYYYYYYYY

“I watched all those aforementioned shows” what shows did i miss something what-

man why you gotta hate on her jane austen fanfic let her live bro

string theory! i can get behind that! sorta-

o no he found the memes-

BOY GOT KNOCKED OUT-

kim there’s people that are dying-

is SHE an antagonist?

quinn? calling himself jasper? u sure hes not just nonbinary? is this just a metaphor for transphobic parenting?

“He died... but somewhere, he grew up.” So is your plan to take a Quinn from a different universe and make him your own, thereby robbing another version of yourself from happiness? When does this ever go well?

Yknow most people, when they lose a kid,,,, kinda,,,,,,, dont go on a ceaseless quest to find another version of their kid that grew up without knowing that another version of his mother was invading other peoples’ dreams to find and kidnap him,,,,,,,, like aint u got a therapist-

“Once you get past the point of not knowing what’s real anymore, you realize it doesn’t matter.” Well, I Got Called Out-

PART 3

“you’re real, oliver.”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

“you’ve been infected by the anti-love parasite of Mandadon” the amatonormativity is strong

so anyways ive been infected since birth hbu-

“James Jasperson, creator of Japple” did you mean to Fancy Well-Educated Man in a Black Turtleneck? cause the only FWEMBT i allow near me is prof. hidgens

“are you winning?” says the capitalist

why did you rewind to see his face?? you have the same face????? is this just bc the creator doesnt like working with other people cause in that case same but???????

“it’s a bad idea. i’m not gonna do it.” we’ve all been there. and we’ve all done it.

looks like me trying to study. (i say, a person who has studied a total of five minutes throughout their entire life.)

your “Spartan trial” looks like a bunch of guys standing on a hill pretending to be something they’re not. Let The Man Bring His Snacks.

eat the apple.

is this your first existential crisis or something what a loser lets all point and laugh

“One of you should be spared, the other shall’nt.” did you mean shant or was that a choice-

yall gonna get called out for talking shut UP

“sorry if this is too personal, btw. are you okay?”

me, confused and half understanding what’s going on and also needing to sleep cause its almost one in the morning but wanting to finish what i can find of lucids which i only starting watching cause i saw an animatic of ranboo and dream w audio from it: i don’t know anymore

“i just want my life back... i was gonna get married-” AREN’T YOU LIKE SEVEN-

ay man if this is a sacrificial cult yall gotta get daniel-

UPDATE: I H A V E N O T F O U N D I T -

“oliver”

I F O U N D I T -

WHICH ONE IS QUINN?? WHO’S JASPER???? WHICH ONE IS BENJAMIN???? I THOUGH BENJAMIN WAS SEVEN BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED WHAT-

oliver. eat the apple.

“Can you still have memories even when you’re dreaming?” One time I woke up to my alarm and fell back asleep and in my dream I remembered that I had class in a few minutes and my dream self woke my real self up so fast I thought I was gonna get whiplash. Anyways, I was late to class bc of my computer but that doesn’t matter.

NOPE I FOUND IT. HERE’S THE AUDIO. THE ANIMATIC ONE. FINALLY.

im thinking car crash. but also maybe murder. but also maybe both? is it raining or was he drowning? is he in a coma? hmmmmmm?

wait olivers the one with the apple does that mean he’s the one dreaming? is the ending gonna be him and jasper (quinn? idk) fighting against ben and mrs hills about jasper eating the apple to save oliver from the dream? hmmmmmmmmmm-

waitwaitwait i thought oliver was 7 how is benjamin 7 years younger than him if they look the same age what what what explain america explain what you mean arkansaw-

are the cuts on his nose plot-relevant or

“What if you hadn’t been driving?” So I was right about the car accident but Mrs. Hills still said he was seven so did i mishear her say that BENJAMIN was seven? but even then oliver would be 14 and that would still be illegal-

“How are you feeling?”

“Like you’re a pretty bad therapist.”

mood

“--it makes it all bearable to have power over the stories we write in our heads” that’s why i write fanfiction

HE’S GOT THE NOTEBOOK HE’S GONNA WRITE SOMETHING ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

WHAT YOU MEAN AN EXPERIMENT THAT’S HIS NAME-

[upon reading the description] so i was right.

wait was that supposed to be the twist in part 2 about the apple in his pocket is that what the existential crisis was about i thought it was because he was introduced to the multiple worlds theory-

PART 4

wait wasnt the other one january 2018 why we going back to 2017-

appol

“--the future and the past all already exist” mhm yep figured this out long ago

there was simultaneously a point in time in which i hadn’t known about this, had been looking it up, had been watching it, and had been writing an ending to this post, and had been posting it the next morning before class. that time is both now and not now. Welcome To The Multiverse Theory or whatever its called-

“--my favorite scene of the movie is waking up next to you.” Mine is eating fast food as I listen to AJJ and play Minecraft. We are not the same.

Now I’m hungry but it’s 1 in the morning and i already put my retainer in god fu-

[reading description] what do you mean previously??? she did that in the first episode????????

[still on description] WHAT DO YOU MEAN WILL QUINN BITE THE APPLE AND GO TO BENJAMINS REALITY ISNT THIS OLIVERS REALITY AND HE HAS TO GET BEN TO BITE THE APPLE WHY IS APPLE CAPITALIZED IS THIS THE DOING OF THE FWEMBT

i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have wa-

[description] oh ive been spelling quinn right the whole time nice

i hope she rejects you /j

WAIT BENJAMIN WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE

ISNT HE IN SECOND GRADE-

HE IS SEVEN YEARS OLD HOW IS HE GETTING MARRIED ARE THERE TWO BENJAMINS THAT WE’RE FOCUSING ON-

bro get out of the road ull get hit

how do you knOW WHICH ONE IS QUINN THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON-

wait

hills wants ben to feed quinn the apple bc in his mind, that will give hills and quinn a happy ending and she doesnt want ben to see the apple bc thats gonna mean ben will know that his reality isnt reality at all. so then oliver has to,,,, not let anyone eat his apple? he just has to wake up?

IS HILLS THE VILLAIN AFTER ALL ORRRRR

wait but if ben sees the apple wont he realize that his reality is wrong and his reality will change, making it so that hills doesnt get her son? or is there some time-based rule that says they’re only transported to the reality that the person believes at that moment? or is this another stab at the multiverse thing where an infinite amount of hills gets their happy endings while an infinite amount of hills doesnt and etc etc?

i should have watched the ba-

oooo dramatique

they’re in a time loop?

nope thats a new powerpoint

wait so theyre,,,, no-

wait-

nvm-

IS THE BEN WE KNOW AN ADULT GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE OR NOT-

“they were actually pretty nice” didnt they throw someone off a cliff-

oh so it got confusing THEN??? NOT BEFORE?????

“it all seemed so real.” is that Not the point of vivid REM sleep hallucinations-

is oliver gonna show ben the apple and ruin hills’ whole operation

WHO ARE ALEX AND RYAN-

“what’s 25-8″ bro dont do this to me-

yep hes gonna show the apple

ayyy the guy who stole karl jacobs jacket it back

the second hand embarrassment is back and I Hate It

all that happens in episode ONE??? bro get some better writers that is bad pacing

“it’s the best!” wait until season eight. no show has a good season eight.

quinn knows about the apple thing w the dreams and multiverse and realities dont he

YOU KILLED HIM

NOT KARL JACOBS NOOOOO HES ALREADY DIED ONCE

oliver is v relatable

wHaT iN tArNaTiOn-

lemme hear that explanaton again-

is bill cipher gonna show up? i hope bill cipher shows up. i miss gravity falls

“ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” moooooooood

did hills murder quinn

is your family the jasper cult

TOXXIICCCCCC get that lady out of your life quinn that is so toxic

“ ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree! ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT’S THE END NO WHAT WHY NO

The Adventures of Benjamin and Oliver

he is Not Good

ope-

wait so ben is equal parts an adult AND a child?? okay that clears a lot up

I MEAN HE WAS RIGHT THO BEN U CAN’T REALLY ARGUE ON THAT-

ew get off the floor

butterfly effect, multiverse theory, memory decay, and your imagination ALL exist yall gonna ignore that cause you wanna be famous?

“We already know what the future looks like!”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

to add to the list of bad things: Cats (2019)

YA BOI THINKS IT’S NOT ALREADY FIFTY YEARS TOO LATE TO START FIGHTING CLIMATE CHANGE FFFFF

BINGO BABYYYY

get what what

what mapped-

awwwww he thinks THEY’RE creating the multiverse

you gonna dismiss the multiverse theory bc of something you created in your current reality? loooserrrrrr

ABUSE YOUR GODLIKE POWERS

she draggin that seven year old

a lot makes sense now why didnt i do this first-

Jasper

the food shortages-

bro that calculators like 90 bucks at walmart

imagine meeting a stranger and they know Everything about your life like that’s gotta be so weird

what’s even weirder is them telling you you’re the deity of a cult that sacrifices animals

THAT FOURTH WALL BREAK WAS-

KARL JACOBS IS DEAD NOOOOOO

ooohhh there’s context for that

OOOOHHHH THERE’S CONTEXT FOR THIS TOOOO

w h a t -

W H A T -

Conclusion:

it’s 2 in the morning and i need sleep but hOOOOO MY GODS THAT WAS GOOD IS IT OVER OR NOT IDK ANYMORE IM TIRED THAT WAS CRAZY I HOPE QUINN AND JASPER GO ON TO BE VERY GOOD FRIENDS, AND I HOPE BENJAMIN AND OLIVER STAY VERY GOOD FRIENDS AND I HOPE HILLS FINDS A THERAPIST WAS A LITTLE CONFUSING BUT I ENJOYED IT

if i dream about apples im suing /j /lh

#lucids #nicholas podany #there's a metaphor in there somewhere #but im not gonna be the one to find it #i dont think i dreamed about apples #youre safe for now podany #for now #EDIT #I PUT 'something their not'#WRONG THERE #I HAVE NO EXCUSE #IM SORRY

37 notes · View notes

iamknicole · 4 years

Text

Just the Two of Us (17)

HAHN AU

(I put all 3 together and hopefully it all makes sense)

When Melissa called Benny in a frantic and he heard all the commotion in the background, he jumped up and woke his brothers up. He sped all the way from Savannah to Maxine. When they got to the house, they saw Melissa trying to pull Marcie away from the big confrontation and the others around them arguing. They jumped out of Benny's truck running over to them.

"Aye, my man, you might wanna back the fuck up," Benny barked pushing Brad away from Melissa.

"She needs to butt out of this, I need to talk to Marcie!"

"I said," Benny snapped pushing him to the ground, "Back the fuck up."

The yelling and arguing was giving Zion a headache and he was already pissed that he had to get out of his bed.

"Everybody just shut the fuck up! That yelling ain't doin shit! Shut up and talk like some fuckin adults! Got damn!"

They all got quiet and stared at Zion, who was glaring and huffing. The fact that these people were arguing in the middle of the night was irritating all three brothers. They went to stand in front of Marcie and Melissa.

"Aight now since yall act like yall got some got damn sense," Cam fussed, "What the hell is going on?"

Natalie stepped forward. "Who are yall and why are yall here? We got this, we don't need help."

"Look, lady, you clearly don't have it or all hell wouldn't be breaking loose," Cam said staring directly at her. "So I'll ask again, what the hell is going on?"

"That bitch has been sleeping with my husband for months!" Marcie yelled trying to get past Cameron.

Benny turned to the women and spoke softly, "Take Marcie in the house and help her pack a bag. Get yall shit and come back out. Aight?"

Melissa pulled her friend to the house, trying to get her to stop cursing. "Why the hell are yall here? I dont know who the hell you think you are. That bitch aint goin nowhere with you three."

Cameron didn't think about it, he just punched Randall in his temple knocking him out then looked at the other people. "Anybody else wanna try and stop me?"

None of them said anything just slowly backed away.

"That's what the fuck I thought."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once she was sure Marcie was asleep, Melissa snuck out of Lainey's room where they were sleeping and went to Benny's room. She closed and locked his bedroom door behind her before creeping over to his bed. Crawling into the bed, Melissa got under the cover and cuddled up under him.

Being a light sleeper, Benny woke up a son as he felt her touch him. "What you doing in here?" He asked sleepily.

"Couldn't sleep. Figured your bed would be better."

"Is that right?"

Melissa rubbed her hand down his bare chest, "Yes. Can I stay?"

Benny knew he should've said no but he was tired and he honestly didn't want her to leave. He pulled her closer to him with one arm and got comfortable trying to ignore her hand and go back to sleep. Her hand continued to explore his chest after he'd closed his eyes, when he didn't stop her she moved her hand lower to his briefs.

"That's not something you wanna do," he warned her with his eyes closed. "Don't do that."

Taking a chance, Melissa pushed her hands into his briefs grabbing his dick. Benny opened his eyes looking over at her then at the ceiling praying internally for forgiveness. He removed her hand then flipped them over so he was on top.

"You asked for this just so we're clear," he mumbled.

Melissa smiled up at him feeling vindicated. "I know I did."

"You better know how to be quiet too."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sun shined beamed down on Charles and Lainey. Charles watched her sleep for almost thirty minutes, he took a few pictures as well setting one of them as his background. He kissed her shoulder a few times before getting out of bed. He pulled his pajama pants on and left the bedroom heading downstairs. On his way to the kitchen he heard laughing and talking coming from the den.

A less than pleasant grunt escaped him seeing his cousin talking with two of his staff members, Oliver and Ramsey.

"Well, well, nice of you to finally join us."

"Its 8am and you're in my home. What do you want?" Charles asked with a frown on his face.

"Is that any way to talk to your favorite cousin?"

Charles glanced at his staff, "Leave us. Come back in four hours not a minute sooner or later."

Both Ramsey and Oliver nodded before bowing out of the room talking quietly amongst themselves.

"What do you want, Nas? I won't ask again."

"I see you found yourself a bedmate. She's a beauty but looks way too innocent for you."

Charles chuckled softly, staring up at the cieling before looking back at his cousin. "You know I'm not something to play with so answer my question or leave."

Nas walked around the den, touching a few of the things Charles had on the shelves.

"You've made quite a few enemies."

"I could say the same for you."

"Charles, do you remember what happened the last time you made an enemy?"

Charles nodded. "I do. And does it look like I give a damn about making another. Say what you need to say then leave."

Nas approached him once more, looking his cousin in the eyes. "Cryer ... that name ring a bell?"

"It might. Why?"

"You're not very well liked by him. Apparently you pose some type of threat to him becoming governor. He heard whispers of you backing his running mate instead."

Charles folded his arms across his bare chest, "Is that right?"

"It might. He's reached out to a few people."

"Which would be who?" Nas stood quietly for a moment making Charles roll his eyes. "Who besides you, Nas? You're ruthless but you're not stupid."

"You might be right," he chuckled. "He reached out to the Malones, this Williams guy and the Parkers."

Charles sucked his teeth. "Mama Rose loves me, she'd kill her own for me. Williams? I've heard of him but I doubt he'd even entertain Jim. The Parkers? They're low level, they couldn't get close to me without my detail."

"That's true but they're looking to come up."

When Lainey realized Charles wasn't in bed, she got up brushed her teeth and went downstairs in search of him. She heard him talking and started to pull at the bottom of her night dress before she rounded the corner.

"Good morning," she said softly.

Charles turned quickly to greet her. He went to her hugging her tight and kissed her forehead. Nas eyed the two of them. Now that he's seen her actual face, he recognized her.

"Morning, beautiful. This is my cousin, Ignacio. Ignacio, this is Lainey." Charles introduced puttong a protective arm around her.

"Nice to meet you, Ignacio," she said giving him a small wave.

Nas took her hand and kissed the back. "Call me Nas, everyone else does, sweetheart."

Charles grabbed her hand away from his cousin and turned to her smiling. "Why don't you go wait on me in the kitchen? And don't start cooking, just wait on me."

Nodding, Lainey said bye to Nas then left the room. Once Charles was sure she was out of earshot, he continued his discussion with his cousin.

"I saw the face. What was that?"

"That's Alaina Parker," he pointed out.

Charles thought for a moment then shook his head. "No, must be a coincidence. I've met her brothers and been around her parents. That's not them."

Nas started at his cousin in disbelief. "You didn't have them check her? You must really like her."

"No, I didn't look her up. There was no need. You saw exactly what I saw, she's innocent. She doesn't even have a car."

Nas moved closer to his cousin. "We may not like each other so that much but be careful. I did my own research on the Parkers and the Williams guy. She is from the Parker family but when she was about six she started to spend a lot of time with that Williams guy and his family. Her and one of her brothers."

"What are you saying?"

"Williams and his wife adopted her and her brother when they were younger. Their family has been trying to get Williams back for taking their kids. This gives them even more reason to do this. 2 birds, one bullet."

Charles' jaw flexed as the wheels in his head started to turn. "You let me know if you hear anything else."

"Of course."

"But don't bring your ass over here unannounced again."

"Only if you promise to look into this so you're not blindsided."

Charles nodded slapping hands with his cousin.

#hahn au #have and have nots au

4 notes · View notes

cryinggameff · 6 years

Text

Seventy-Five

Randi

Cameron’s crying woke me up early in the morning as usual. I started to get up but Cayden mumbled, "I got him," and got up from the bed. I looked over at the clock. It was 8am. Cayden would be leaving for work soon and I'd be going to drop Cam at my moms. I was trying to slowly get back to going to work, a couple of times a week anyways. Cayden worked a normal 9-5 schedule now, the ride share app he had invested in had blown up and now he was a cowener in a big time company which kept him busy. He really loved what he was doing which made me happy. I was co-owner of 2 salons now. After almost 2 years of back and forth, a second location was up. That required me putting in more regular hours though, which meant leaving Cameron. I felt guilty about working for months after He was born, but now a year later, Cayden and Ms. Williams,my therapist, both convinced me that working was good for me and that i wasn't evil for doing so. He was 1 now and I felt better about leaving him with someone else. I wasn’t breastfeeding anymore and he didn’t need 24/7 attention. But i couldn't deny being a mom came first on my list of priorities and consumed most of my time and thoughts, and i was fine with that.

"You going into the salon today?" Cayden asked, coming back in the room with Cam. I smiled reaching out for him. Seeing him in the morning was the best part of my day because after sleeping for a few hours I missed him. His face lit up when he saw me and he giggled, bringing out his cute dimples. When I looked at him I thought about the fact that I almost missed out on this because I was set on not having kids. I also thought about everything I went through to give birth to him and the fact that I’d do it all over again.

"Good morning mommy's baby," i cooed, nuzzling his face. "Yeah, i'm going in. I have so much to do for tax season," I said.

"My mom taking him this week?" he asked. I nodded. Our parents switched who would watch him. It was perfect because they all didn't work anymore. God knows i couldn't leave Cam with strangers. Cayden took his shirt off to go shower, revealing his perfect chest, well perfect except the gunshot wound under his right peck. He leaned down to kiss me and i met him. He kissed me for a long time and Cam started crying.

"You need to get ready, and i gotta get him some food," i said. We went separate ways and went about our morning routines.

At the door Cayden gave Cameron some last cuddles then handed him to me. He kissed my forehead.

"Imma see you tonight beautiful," he said. I smiled and nodded. I watched him get in his car and go. Then i had to get Cam and myself in my car and drove to Cay's mom's house. On the way there I thought about how normal life was now, Cayden going to work in the morning, to a legit job, m dropping of our kid, and going to work. Life was so different now.

I got to the salon later in the morning and went back to my office. I sat down and immediately checked my phone. It was habit now whenever someone else was watching Cam. I checked for texts or calls about him. When i saw nothing i reluctantly got my computer on and started pulling up my files. I worked for about 2 hours before i cracked and checked grabbed my phone to call Cay's mom. She didn't answer my call and i put my phone down angrily.

"He's fine Randi," i said to myself, turning back to my computer. The separation anxiety i felt with him was hard to explain. It was different than with Cayden. When he wasn't with me i got that feeling like when you think you're forgetting something really important, but constant. It was weird not hearing him cry or laugh for so long, it put me on edge. I wasn't sure how Cayden was able to just go to work like it was nothing.

Jada came in then.

"Hey, I put all those receipts on your desk, did you see them?" She asked.

"yeah," i said with a sigh. I glanced at my phone again.

"Whats up with you?" She asked.

"It's Cameron," i said.

"Why is he sick?" she asked with a frown.

"No. But Cayden's mom won't answer my calls. I just want a picture of him so i know he's ok," i said.

"She's probably busy watching him, it's a good thing she not on her phone," she said. She had a good point. "You worry too much," she said, leaving the office. I knew i worried too much, i didnt wanna be like this. It just came with the whole mom thing.

Later a knock came at my door and i looked up. It was a delivery guy.

"Mrs. Jones?" he asked.

"yeah, thats me,"i said. He gave me the clipboard and i signed it, looking around for the package.

"Package is out front," he said. I thanked him and went out to the front desk to check what is was. China turned to look at me.

"I hate you," she said. I was confused, then i saw the huge bouquet of flowers. I smiled like an idiot, jumping up and down a little. I picked up the card.

--->To my beautiful wife, because i can't stop thinking about you. Im sure you're thinking about Cam not me but that's ok. P.S he's fine, stop worrying. From: Cay and Cam

I teared up and held the card to my chest. I loved how thoughtful Cayden could be. That gave me the motivation i needed to get through the day.

I picked Cam up around 3 and made my way back home. Cole called me on my way saying that he was coming over. He beat me home and was waiting in the drive way when i got there. He helped me get Cam out of the car.

“My little man!” He said, taking him from his car seat.

“He just put on a show on the way home, cried the whole ride. He's so tired.” We went inside.

“You on your own?” He asked.

“Yeah, Cayden still at work.”

“Damn, he really taking this CEO shit serious. You can always leave him with me if you need a break,” he said.

“I’m seriously gonna take you up on that, but anyways, so bachelor party. I have everything set, just need to know what time you want the limo.”

“Like 10 probably. I plan on being drunk by then so it don’t really matter,” he chuckled, letting Cam play with his fingers.

“Ok. I still need an outfit, I’m always scared to be out dressed by the strippers,” I said. I was gonna be the only girl at the bachelor party, I wasn’t planning on staying too long anyways, I knew I’d be missing Cameron and I wanted to let Cole hang with his buddies.

"Aint that weird? Going to a strip club with your man?" He asked, putting Cam's pacifier back in his mouth.

"Not really. Im used to it," i said, "but he doesn't even go anymore. This will be the first time he's gone since Cam was born. But why are you going to a female strip club when you don't like girls is the real question?"

"Male strip clubs aint the same," he shrugged. "Only thing is i know Ty attracted to females so that's gonna be a bit weird." I went around the kitchen making something to eat for all of us. I started cutting stuff up for a salad and warming a bottle for Cameron. Cole came to sit at the island.

"Im sure he'll behave himself," i said. "He's marrying you, so clearly he's not checking for anyone else, male or female" i assured him. He nodded.

“Did you get nervous before your wedding?” He asked. I nodded.

“Hell yeah. You know i was a mess leading up to it. I had a panic attack day of too," i laughed remembering. "You getting nervous bout it?"

"A little," he shrugged. It was odd to see Cole unsure or worried about anything. He was always so care free, go with the flow type of guy.

"It'll go away once you see him on the day," i assured him. He nodded in agreement.

"One more week to go," he said.

Cayden

I was in meetings all day today which was tiring. Sometimes this job was more tiring than drug dealing, which i ever expected. I really liked doing something different though. When i thought about it, i kind of did the same thing when i was in charge of the warehouses, i handled all the business behind the dealing. Negotiated with cartels, contracted people, allocated supplies. That's pretty much what i did now, just not with drugs. I was really into the whole tech thing too, the dudes i worked with were crazy smart, inventing apps and shit.

After my meetings i went to my office to check my emails. I checked my phone too and saw the message from Randi thanking me for the flowers.

There was also a message from Keisha which I opened. It was a photo of her son after a basketball game. Yes, i had stayed in touch with her, because that was my nephew, and the circumstances didn’t change that. Randi was all for it and we’d even have him over sometimes. So I’d see him here and there and she kept me up to date on what he was doing. I chuckled a little at his big gap smile, he looked so much like Trey it scared me at times. The more I was getting to know him the more I saw Trey in him, and that made me feel like my brother was still here.

After replying some emails I finally made my way home. It was an hour past Cameron’s bed time which meant I wouldn’t get to hang with him before he slept. I walked around downstairs and when I didn’t see Randi I went upstairs. I could hear her in the nursery. I walked over quietly and stood by the door. Randi was bouncing Cameron in her arms while he was fussing. She was so small he took up her whole torso now and he was only 1.

“Shhh, Mommy’s got you Cam ” she said softly,rubbing his back in circles. He finally got quiet and she went to put him back in his crib. She turned on the rain machine for him because he loved that shit and couldn't sleep without it. She finally turned towards the door and she jumped when she saw me, putting her hand to her chest.

“Jesus Cay, how long you been standing there?”

“Not long, but I can watch you with him all day,” i said, going up to wrap my arms around her waist.Her hair was all messed up, coming out of the bun she had, and she was wearing sweats, but she still looked fine. I looked over her head to Cam in his crib. “I tried to get home before he went to sleep," i said. I had stayed at the office later than usual.

“You just missed him. He woke up from a bad dream,” she frowned.

“I know what you’re thinking. We didn’t give him bad dreams Ran, he’s a baby, probably just wanted some attention” i could read her mind. Randi had this theory that Cameron inherited bad dreams from us because sometimes he would wake up crying or screaming. We both had a history of bad dreams so maybe it was possible but I still assured her that wasn’t the case.

“You don’t know that,” she mumbled. I tugged a piece of her hair.

"Come on, you gonna wake him up," i said, pulling her out of the room. I dragged her into our room so i could change. "I talked to Ty today, the suit is ready. Can you pick it up tomorrow for me?"

"Yeah, i have to go pick up my dress anyways," she said. "I'm so excited, I can’t believe this is finally happening" she smiled, folding her legs.

"Im just surprised neither one of them backed out yet, i thought for sure Ty would have wigged out by now," i said, taking my shirt off.

"Cole is the one I was worried about. He came over earlier, he was freaking out a little," she said, grabbing my shirt and straightening it out. "But i told him that was normal. I was loosing my shit before our wedding, but if i made it down the aisle, he can."

"True. I deadass thought you weren't gonna show up to our wedding,"i laughed remembering.

"Thought about running, my dad dragged me out of that room though," she laughed as well.

"Your ass lucky i still married you after making a nigga self conscious and shit," i mumbled. It was easy trying to lock her down. She grabbed my arm.

"I been lucky since the night you drove me home from the club," she said, referring to the first time we met. I thought back to that night and where we were now. "Even though you didn't say one word to me that whole car ride."

"I was having a bad day," i chuckled, "it wasn't personal. And i showed up to your house the next day didn't i. And day after that, and pretty much everyday after."

"You were,” she nodded. I sat down beside her and pulled her in to me. “I think that’s why I liked you. You were consistent, and I needed that,” she said like she was deep in thought. “Who would have thought back then that we'd be married and have a kid together?"

"I thought so," i said with a loud laugh. She looked at me like i was crazy. "Dead ass. I knew after that first day, that was it, you was the one. I never just wanted to be around someone all the time before,” I played with her hair.

“Why do you say all the right things?” She said softly, looking back at me.

“I also say the wrong things sometimes,” I reminded her. “You was just mad at me yesterday.”

“That’s true,” she gave me a side eye remembering the petty argument we had gotten into. We didn’t really fight like that anymore. Having a kid together made other things seem irrelevant, and we had a different level of respect for each other now as his parents.

“You know what’s weird? Like a year ago we probably would have been sorting through duffle bags of coke right now,”I said randomly. She laughed.

“Yup, I’d be counting, estimating profits,” she shook her head, “that feels like a life time ago.”

“You was really ride or die for a nigga,” I said, “even when shit was hot,” I looked at the scar on my rib and thought about how she had taken care of me.

“I knew what I signed up for. It was hard for me after the shooting though, I can’t lie. After that day...I knew I was done. Then I got pregnant, and that just pushed me to say what had been in my mind for a long time, it was all about Cam from that moment on,” she played with my hand in hers. “Do you miss all that?”

“Nah. I was done with that part of my life. I was already starting my plan to get out before you told me, but that just made it that much more important to do it. I knew the life you wanted and I wanted to give it to you, and to our kid” I looked over her face. She nodded and we sat in silence for a little bit. After some time she looked down and put a hand to her stomach.

“Sometimes I miss having him inside of me,” she smiled. I raised a brow.

“Does that mean you ready for a second one?” I said excited, pulling her closer in to me.

“Hey don’t get excited. We talked about this, we said next year,” she reminded me, pushing me away.

“We gotta start now if we gonna get 5 out the way before we old,” I said. She leaned back and looked at me like i was insane. I tried to kiss her and she was trying to run away.

“Cayyyyy” she complained as I planted my lips on her neck.

Cole

***a week later***

Today was the day, and to say I was nervous was an understatement. I had never been this nervous to step out on the football field, or even when I came out to my family. This was different. I knew I wanted to be with Ty forever, but it was the idea of ‘marriage’ that made it all so fucking scary.

It was funny to me because this was all Ty’s idea. He had asked me to marry him. It had crossed my mind too but I wasn’t sure he wanted all that. I was happy to just be whatever we were. Living together was the main thing I had wanted and I got that.

Our families now loved each other and we were both in good places with them. My mom and I were the closest we had ever been, which I wouldn’t have expected 3 years ago after all the family drama. But this wedding was a big part of why we came together. She wanted to be there for me and was happy to see me happy. She was helping me tie my bow tie, and crying while doing it.

“I’m really happy for you Cole” she said, “I can tell Ty is in love with you, and it’s clear you love him.”

“I do,” I said.

“All I’ve ever wanted was this for you. I know it may not always have seemed like it. I just hate that we weren’t on good terms for so long,” she wiped a tear, “when you’re my only son. I know now that I was wrong,” she said.

“I was wrong too mama. I was so angry I couldn’t put my pride aside and fix things with you,” I admitted.

“Well, that’s all in the past now. The important thing is everything is how it should be now. Just me and my baby,” she said with a smile.

“I love you mama” I said, kissing her cheek.

“I love you too baby,” she patted my cheek. “There, you look handsome as ever. That Ty is so lucky he scored you.”

“You ready to walk me down the aisle?” I asked, holding my arm out. Both of our mothers were walking us down. Ty was supposed to go first and I knew he was already there and waiting for me. That made me excited. The music started playing then and my stomach flipped.

“That’s our cue,” my mom said, opened the doors to the ceremony room.

I could see Ty standing there on a suit, something I hadn’t seen since Cayden and Randi’s wedding, anxiously waiting. He was touching the cuffs on his shirt but then looked up and made eye contact with me. We both smiled and the nerves and anxiety melted away.

The reception was lit. We had a DJ and all our friends and family were on the dance floor. A slow song came on and Ty grabbed me to dance with him. I had been separated from him for a while talking to people.

“I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever,” he said. I smirked.

“Awe you missed me?” I said. He rolled his eyes.

“Maybe,” He said.

“Well you bout to be stuck with me for a real long time now if that makes you feel any better.”

“I still can’t believe we’re married, that’s kind of lame,” he said, looking at the ring on his hand.

“Yeah but it’s cute. We still gonna be the same so,” i shrugged.

“Yeah, I’m glad we did it. For our families too,” he looked around at the people around us and I did the same. There was a lot of people happy to see us happy, and that touched both of us since not everyone was ok with our life style. I spotted Randi then, standing just off the dance floor holding Cameron on her hip. Cayden had his arm around her. I winked at her and she winked back. Both our lives had turned around in a matter of a couple years, and we were happier than ever. It made a nigga a bit emotional. I had been at her wedding and now she was at mine, that was some movie shit.

“I hope your winking at your mother, or else I’m throwing hands,” Ty said, following my gaze. “Oh it’s Randi.”

“You jealous?” I teased.

“Y’all petty niggas deserve each other,” he said, shrugging. “The friendship still confuses me though,” he said.

“Me too. But I just know she been there for me like nobody else, other than you. She was my family when I wasn’t on good terms with mine,” I explained.

“I get that,” he nodded.

“Now i have it all, my family,my friends, and you,” i smirked. He smiled back at me and pulled me in to kiss me.We kissed like it wasn’t a room full of people.

Randi

I was standing watching Cole and Ty be cute when my mom came and took Cam from me.

“You two go dance,” she said, nodding at the dance floor. Cayden took my hand and pulled me in that direction. He put his arms around my waist and I put mine over his shoulders.

“This reminds me of our first dance,” I said, grinning like a little kid. “I’m just missing the dress, and I have an extra 30 pounds on me now but other than that,” I laughed. He slipped his hands to my butt as if we weren’t in public.

“I like the way you look now,” he said, “you sexy as hell to me,” sliding his hands around to my hips, “Shit, i been thinking about taking that dress off all night,”

“Thank you Baby,” I said, “you make me feel sexy.” He really did, even when I was pregnant and blowing up, or now when my body was still not the way it used to be.

When we got home I wanted to take off my makeup and shower so Cay signed up to put Cameron to sleep. I took a quick shower and then went to peak in the nursery wondering what was taking him so long. Cayden was sitting in the rocking chair with Cameron in his lap and a book in his hands. I stood outside listening for a while and i laughed quietly at the voices he gave all the characters. Creating a human with someone changed the relationship forever. Yes i loved him even before i had his baby, but loving Cameron together on top of loving each other was a strange and powerful thing.Plus him being caring and protective was such a turn on and made me wanna give him 5 more kids. He was such a hands on dad too, which i knew he would be. When Cam was first born all I really did was breastfeed or pump, Cayden changed all the diapers, got him cleaned and dressed, and took him when I needed sleep. That’s the kind of husband and dad he was.

"Randi I know you eavesdropping" he said once he was finished the book.

"What?! how did you know?" I moved into view and then walked inside the room.

"I could hear your ass laughing," he said, "You just salty he likes my reading better."

"You are really good at story time," i smiled, sitting on his lap beside Cameron. I looked at his adorable face and took him in like i did several times a day in disbelief at how perfect he was. The best part was he now had freckles coming in slowly just like Cayden’s. I touched his cheek and then Cayden's, comparing.

"Why you not in bed?" Cayden asked.

"Well, I had to tell you something really important," i said seriously like i was gonna drop some big news. His brows came together in confusion.

"What?"

"I been wanting to say this for a while..." i said, dragging it out. "But i wasn't sure how."

"You can tell me anything," he said, rubbing my arm. I sighed then paused.

"Ok, here it goes," i said, "Cayden, i...love you" i grinned. He kissed his teeth and tried to push me off him. I laughed and grabbed on to his neck to stay on. "Babe!" i pleaded, fighting to stay on while he was pushing me.

"Why you waste my time like you was gonna say something important," he said annoyed. He was really mad. I giggled and cupped his cheek.

"Im sorry," i said. "But i really have been wanting to tell you how much i love you," i said. His face changed to a little less mad. “I know I don’t always show my appreciation for you, and I’m not good at the romantic stuff like you, but I just wanted you to know that i do thank God everyday for you. You keep me grounded, and you're my rock” I finished. His cheeks were pink which was so adorable. He hated being complimented and never knew how to respond. He closed the space between us and kissed me tenderly.

“I told you i always got you, and I love you too." Cam grabbed my shirt then and i smiled down at him and picked him up. I held him close to me and he immediately closed his eyes. I looked from him to Cayden, and then back at him and i felt everything I couldn’t years ago during the darkest period of my life. I was filled with hope, and joy, and a fierce love for life.

#Jhene Aiko #chris brown #jhene chilombo #jhene efuru #jhene aiko fanfic #jhene aiko fanfiction #New Chapter #chris brown fanfic #chris brown ff #team breezy #fanfiction #fandom #fan fiction #fanfic #fanfic update #celebs #celebrity fanfic #j cole fanfic #LGBTQ fiction

41 notes · View notes

nocancer · 5 years

Text

Tryna by Cancer moon

Before Young T went to bed he poured a glass of water and looked out the kitchen window to his backyard and noted how the snow made 3:00 A.M. look like 6:00 P.M.. Only difference being that if he stepped outside with his glass of water to the seeming twilight he wouldn’t be able to hear the rush-hour traffic like he usually could if it was Friday and 6:00 P.M.. Young T didn’t bother going outside because the snow was still falling a little and it’d be there when he woke up. And the neighborhood would still be silent, as it always was.

Young T woke up and his fan was still humming its white noise which he needed to sleep at night even though it was January and his dad was reluctant to leave the heat on over night. The small fan sat on his dresser and was pointed away from his bed towards his window which emitted a sharper and more blinding afternoon light than what he was used to. He checked his phone for the time, it was about noon - about the time where his parents bedroom door would open and their TV would blast the local news and his persian cat, Jo Jo, would meow at his door from which would force him out of bed to open the door so Jo Jo could jump up on his bed to sleep on his pillow from which he would either start his day or keep doing nothing. This time he laid back down, idly on his bed, with the covers pulled over his head to lessen the effects of his slight cat allergy. Jo Jo had a flat face and was grey and fat, and he occupied the entire pillow. Young T thought of how he wanted to trade lives with Jo Jo.

Young T couldn’t fall back to sleep, so he looked at his phone. He bireifly looked at worldstarhiphop, Twitter, then Instagram.

Then he went to bed with a head ache and woke up in college.

9/27/17 wednesday

Tycho: excuse me, hey, getting along just fine, I see? Yolandra: hey, and yeah, sort of, just studying, whats going on with you T: Nothing, the usual, i guess, being responsible, trying not to offend anyone. Y: Oh but you're so innocent. If anyone's offended its on them, not you. T: But my presence alone, I dont know, like I'm out of place or something. And I just want to tell people, Yeah, so, I know how strange it is, me being here and all. Y: You're a free spirit amongst prisoners. That was my favorite part about getting to know you.

Tycho: After all these years, not for a second did i think you were right for me. And thats why i liked you. Cus I'm crazy. Yolandra: thats okay? what do you mean?, i want to get inside your head again. T: [pause] Most people wouldnt understand. Y: Don't be too cool for school. Im not most people. If I knew what was good for me, I'd have cut ties with you a long time ago. But im a crazy bitch too. Havent you realized? T: Yes. Youre highly psychic when it comes to "free spirits" like me - and you, though maybe, "lost soul" would be a better term for me. Though I dont mind being lost. It keeps things interesting. Anyway, you should spend your energy on solving world hunger than worrying about me. Y: dont be so difficult. catching vibes isnt easy you know? coming for your type. Who knows, maybe youre worth it. Tycho: well, your the first to try me like this. im mysterious for a reason. Yolandra: And do you know why exactly? T: Thats for me to decide. Y: It's so damn frustrating. But I guess some things are better left unsaid. T: Most people wouldnt understand that, what youre saying. Indescribable feelings we know happened but fall short in explaining. That sort of thing. Y: I call those. "You had to be there" moments. Tycho: Honestly i never gave up on you, only myself, thinking you were different from my dream girl. it took months for me to realize that but when i did the only thing i wanted to do was forget i ever met you. Yolandra: than what? T: the rest of these simple people that surround us, they see in a way thats opposite of what i am. Y: how convenient it must be. to blame your problems on people you dont even know. and just say "fuck it." I envy you. T: just my luck haha. of being born into myself, my personality forgive me, i dont mean to be such a downer. thats my ego talking Y: you had to be there T: where? Y: in my memories. T: it matters that much to you? Y: if I could find you in a crowd, just to say something, anything, even if i have to scream it in your ear, then you'd know how much it means to me. Tycho: I'll be waiting for you to say hola.

9/30/17 saturday In the midst of an obnoxious trap beat I remember what my grandpa used to tell me. It's the harsh realities of life that stick with us the most. A dream is only a dream until you make it come true. Never hit a women no exceptions." He would say to a 7 year old me. Now I wish I had the balls back then to tell him that his strict army ass probably never had a dream that went beyond what he already knew. Like revisiting the same shitty cloud of meaningless thoughts every night till you reincarnate into someone who revisits a slightly less shitty cloud over and over until they become someone like me, who lives on the cloud everyone strives to be, forgetting those elvish looking folks of the below who never leave the house except to get groceries. There's comes a point in life where you just gotta be honest with yourself, and say hey, i just dont match the freqeuncy anymore. It's okay. I can still pretend like that one MGMT song, but im fading away. Fuck. I get naseous and imagine a cop coming around the corner which kills my vibe for a second so I take my headphones off, spit on my finger tip, ash the blunt, and walk to my dorm. I'm in water so muddy that the surface is all I have to cling onto. What lies beneath is my past, housing the memories like demons. Of course, her face, would be in the middle. Falling more faintly in detail as I wake up sober and go to sleep high and dream nonsense that somehow doesnt go away like the usual forgotten dream you usually wouldnt give a second thought to otherwise but this morning my head feels foggy and theres a vague recollection of a search going on but I dont know what it's for and my chances of knowing diminish as I go deeper into the day. A search, it's on repeat, like my brain is an actual TV. Thats probably a normal thought to have, though I've never heard it in real words. "Is my brain a TV." I say to myself. if you can call it that. but those take the shape of monsters of which, as if I had no choice, I find myself preparing for so when the moment really matters, I can either go down in a blaze of glory or come out on top like the badass I imagine myself to be. All I know is that I was born and now I have to live.

Maybe because my past is so glaringly depicted onto a person I refuse to acknowledge. All that shit was a dream. The only thing that matters is the present, right? Bill Nye the Science Guy would agree with that. Back in elementary whenever we had a sub for the day, a cart would roll in and thats how you knew. I watched his show in elementary school, when we had a substitute teacher. Those were the best days. I had no worries then, able to speak freely with no inhibitions as if duality had nothing to latch its mechanical claws onto. Wait, I'm thinking about the past again. And thats going way back. Fuck! Okay.. On your feet soldier! That baby momma drama dont fly out here in the real world. out here it's the winners and the losers, haves and the have-nots, thats the way it is.

We're here to endure anxiety. I dont care about this slave shit. I think im gonna drop out. These fucking people bro, I shouldve known better than to come here. Deep down in the recesses of my highly realized capacity for recognizing everyday objects I'm hearing the voice my computer makes. It just so happens that I'm a little different from everyone else. I see things. Feel them. Some are expressed. Others proccessed. Though most get put away for later. These things I speak of is all they'll ever be to Some bad. Some good. But in the end I understand the root cause is nothing and thats where I pretty much exist anyway. In between any and all things, including people. At least that what it feels like. So although I may come off as shy and maybe a bit soft to the average layperson I aint no bitch and I wont hesitate to put my body on the line to make some headway when it comes to cementing my place as a savage demon in the halls of said layperson's memory bank. Someone who is wise would recognize the virtue of my conviction It is only because I must prepare for that singular moment, an unknown point in the fabric of time and space. To where if theyre not careful, a life's worth of energy should be pitted against me as if one were to stand a chance against the power housed within my vessle. Theres no such thing as a polite gesture. Nobody asks me how my day is "going" for no other reason than to relay to me how their own special day is "going". reckoning between a humble acknowledgement that I can never truly grasp the reason for existing and therefor should play my part in keeping the peace, versus pure badass in a world of sheep. And the more I get to know my surroundings, the more I reach erradically for the inherent bliss found within the path of satanism.

000t333g922276888o

Spmewhere off in the distance, Crermoth sits on a palm tree idly sculpting astral suspensions into a tattered fervor of mesh for working the keys of ineptitude. She is oblivious to her surroundings, not caring for chatty and gossip which she cant seperate between her reality and theirs because she is sensitive and when the the fully recognized sage, Esoh, confronts her about she says she much prefers it that way.

Their balance among them. With the wind at her side, Hojihka refuses the initial preference of her stillness and moves in a nameless precession by the whim of her ancestral birth right. "aaa may-ee soo shay-noo"

Her possession wakes up without a name. a new and more elaborate transposition of jubilee onto each successive indifference. The attention to one area renders the outer confines a vacuum enveloping the excess span unto both of their liable to taken over like a plain, sole, unconscious will. It certainly does its job Crermoth and has become something of a plan b pill thats taken during one of her many unpredictable episodes of self hate and general spiritual torment. One time she told J-Money she was a demon in a matter of factness that still haunts J-Money in moments when he pretends it doesnt bother him.. Reliant upon the interaction of her world and the next. Crermoth normally prefers being to herself on nights like these, that way she can answer any calls at a moments notice. A dimension close enough so that she may assist her friends in earthly manners of which, by the natural law of limitation, those lacking the incessant nobility of the Orisha cannot be bothered to see to themselves, less the tether between her world and theirs be rendered a useless tattered fervor of mesh that gives way to any varitable knock of an over arching brood of usurpment of the mundane frequency. “I need space. I only have but so much light of see to her calling as a being of light, assisting the pieces of herself that we’re lost during the falling. You remember that don’t you?” She says “Of course I remember. But only as a matter of fact. Upon closer reflection I fail to see the relevance of a subtle hunch with no bearings in the present.”

I must know that I’m allowed to be straight up with you, else I run the risk of straying from my calling. If there’s anything I hate more than being ignored its catching myself being lazy to the voices. “She musn’t veer to far.” Esoh said on a mountain.

999c4477P72222cv555566

The woman wakes up to look around. Store-bought soil, empty bike-rack, office building. "Harder. Think harder. Come on girl." She stands for dignity's sake. A car traces a hilltop in the distance. She raises her cold arms to the sun in defiance of stillness. Nothing is in tune with the nature of her being besides the stale wind of a coming day. "Where are you?" The car freezes as it reaches the horizon, but the sound remains on loop. Whirrrrr A portal manifests abruptly and Elegua arrives on a chariot of skulls. "Erzulie, madame, how nice it is to see you this early in the morning." A whisp of fire cleans her face and the car continues over the horizon. "It really shouldnt be, not like this. Where Im at should tell a lot you know." Erzulie said. "Quite a dense reply to a longtime friend, dont you think" "Hmm, considering how I slept in a bush last night and dont remember a thing. I shouldnt need to explain myself." "No? is the friz on your hair not matching the blood on your knees? I can't tell which." Elegua said. Or is the attitude possessing you as if theres no consequence for ill-manneredness? I cant tell which." So long as one's not so dense up his selfish ass that he aint notice." "Oh so now all a sudden you about the finer things in life? We can switch places less you miss me. Erzulie said. Im only pointing out the obvious." Elegua said. Erzulie replied with silence, forcing life to flash before his eyes. She learned this from her Mother, Darkness. "Attitude is possessing you. I cant tell why but its a poison I dont deserve. I was only trying to help" He continued. "I just dont fuck with being called too early. So long as youre not too dense up your ass to take notice, safe to say i'm in some shit right now." "Clearly. A product of consequence." Elegua said randomly. "Yeah, recognize. Please, for me, baby?" "No more testing your patience, Goddess immortal of justice. Save that for what I came to tell you about." "Take me to cleanliness, saintly promise of wisdom. For im not feeling myself." They left the scene to the past and pondered on the pyramid they had just made with each other. "It's nice to be home." Erzulie said. Flying over the palm trees brought Elegua back to his power. "On the basis of love." Elegua said. The salt-water washed away all glimpses of doubt Erzulie had of her beauty. And she harnessed the pastels of the ocean. Thus, all guilt was abolished and unconditional love was convinced to dance within them. Drying his body under the rays of Amen reminded Elegua of his first words. Long ago, before Time was born. "O Father, you are so brilliant." "Thank you, son. I am the Light" "Then tell me, Father, if you are the Light, and are so brilliant, then why is it you flee from Darkness?" "All I do is my purpose, which seeks to balance harmony with creation. Although it is much more complicated than that. Like always I suppose. I'm afraid you ask me a question that I cannot answer. Here, because you are so curious, I will show you." "I'm ready, Father." Light grew brighter causing Elegua to cry in his recollection of what it felt like to say words. The links in his mind straining to pull in the right words. Not too plain to where the moment would be lost in happen stance, and not too radical so that his manhood could stay irrefutable (to convey meaning.) Then Light disintegrated into everything and Elegua searched for Light ever since. So Elegua went to the crossroads, and prodded Darkness for Light's wherabouts, "I want to relive the the moments before he left for eternity. Where can I find him?" Without a hug or a kiss, she told him to let go of his experience in order to live in the now, "Take his place and move forward. Grow up, your Daddy's gone cus you never did." "How could you say that me? I love you, Mom. Yet all I get is hate. Why are you hiding the truth from me?" "If I don't hate you, then who will? You got so much to learn that my heart breaks into brass. You must leave, understand me? LEAVE, before I do what your Father did and them some. I'm this close. Believe me." With nowhere else to go, Elegua obeyed the commands of his Mother. Although lonely at first, the spirits of the dead related to his despair, and offered to guide him through all the known and unknown realms of Ether, so long as he guided the spirits of the living to his Mother. So that the dead could learn for themselves the origins of their being dead. And when Light came back, they could say "Father, we know of Hate, now teach us Love." Elegua tried telling them that it was hopeless, that his Father was there, just not in the way they imagined, that they we're actually his Father and they had to realize it through an altered perception. but that negativity only made them more adament to their cause which annoyed Elegua into a manic spell of existential irony which persisted during times of war with the Snakes on 5th density. One battle in particular Badly wounded, he pulled his chariot with his arms to the middle of a corn-field on a full-moon during the Solstice, it was there he made a pact with his self, to never be ignorant to the fact that fate was an inescapable constant within all contributors to existence. That the very fabric that distinguishes the dead from the living was comprised of scattered shards of an indestructable essence that attached itself to the spirit-body via fate which is the Father of destiny. That the collective conscious is woven by the thread of Fate, thus binding a common goal, or Destiny, inherent to all beings of both polarities, thus setting in motion the spiral of gnosis, which lends itself to the spreading of keys that open the doors to helping each other fulfill each others Purpose. "I will collect the pieces of my Father so that I may speak with him again as I did as a child. I will never forget you because I love you. You are everything to me, which is all I ever could be. Please, I want to know why you flee in the face of Darkness."

____10/9/17 monday

My pace quickens as I veer away from the crowd onto the handicap stairs. I silently count my steps to give off a pensive, non-assuming vibe. Over by the quad theres crows just walking on the grass. Yet I'm the only one who seems to notice, even from a distance. The busses haul ass down Memorial St. I've learned to always be on alert because I'll never know whats waiting for me when I turn my attention off the floor and become reminded of string theory. Artificial energy, cork boards with grime on the edges, tunnel of dull ends, spongy plywood cielings. as i step with my head down and in every so sudden a demarcation in the bricks, the reptiles answer emails. This is where I'm going. Because my soul chose to live here at some point in time not too long ago considering the relationship between all that the universe has to offer and my general apathy towards said all as in any and all one. Which has become quite of a bore ever since the first week ended I had to come to terms with the reality that friends won't simply fall into my lap like they would if I wasnt such a masochist for being lonely. The row of pillars turn to one and all I see is the contentment in the air of the lobby. In the hallway are casually turned faces which glide about in a linear fashion like the ghost of a lost bride.. I get a side-view of the people afraid to admit that this is far from the paradise we expected it to be. The brochure in our acceptance letters didn't include the drunken nights of another dimension. I'm inside the life of an architect. One who's dead by now, but lives on through his work. I'm not going anywhere, the building would say, if it could talk. And I suppose it can. Because I just had the thought, and nothing is ever truly wrong without another thought to compare it to. But then if buildings could speak existed first, and was allowed to grow and find its place in the universe, then it'd be established enough to not warrant an adversary. But the question remains where, if it existed, was its fate organized before coming into my mind, awaiting my final judgement. Substitute me for a unicellular collective conscious and it seems like we're all dealers of fate her on planet earth of the milky way of the universe of the whatever comes next (should we ever know for sure). he or she deserves all the credit for it manifesting onto the grid of my consciousness, which is a zig zag joint's worth of a high right now. The perfect amount for not giving a fuck while still staying slick enough for witty comebacks. Which wouldn't hurt right now. This building isn't going anywhere. Though I wish it would. Because I dread what I'm about to do How he must have pained to communicate something he could call his own while maintaining a dignified and safe, always safe, because god forgive, well, you know, , putting the pen to the pad, drawing collumns in front of a Victorian fassad Succumbing to authority just to eat with a roof over your head and not freeze your ass off like a homeless freak. Profit margins in the final half of quarter one are lower than 1 standard deviation to what is considered by corporate to be optimal. As of now, the college has no incentive to ship in product from outside sources. All inventory must be stored in house to the buyer's demand. You better not be late.

___ On the parking deck

Tycho: “I had a dream I was on an internet forum. Someone posted the words: “life is an endless hell. With a blurry picture of a street at night-time. Not much different from what’s in front of us. I thought that made sense, until I scrolled down, to see a video looking out the windshield of a vintage rolls royce, coasting along a pacific highway. And the lines kept going. Next thing you know I’m falling down a pitch black waterslide, dreading my destination. If I never woke up I have a funny feeling i know where it was leading.

Preacher: In that instance did you feel the need to repent for your sins?

Tycho: No. that didn’t cross my mind. It was too late at that point.

Miranda: “I used to.

T: What made it stop?

Miranda: Seeing all the happy people around me. And knowing that they’ve been through the same shit. Break-ups, Death in the family, just generally feeling lost.

My heart was broken ”

T: Getting over the mind can be a dark place when it has nowhere else to rest. You can train it to think anything.”

Miranda: True

Tycho: Lately Ive been taking these long drives late at night into the boonies. Just to see where I up. I realized theres so many lives I’ll never know about.

If i wasnt born into money maybe I’d be humble enough to hate myself for even thinking such a thing.

How’d you get out of that?

Miranda:

These know it all professors are getting on my nerves. I fear Im crossing into an abyss I’ll never fully understand. Honestly I can’t fuckin stand these people. What name do I have to make for myself that i haven’t already experienced in the depths of my soul?

Tyco: You know how they try to act like they all official and shit, like I won’t see past it.

Miranda: [agreement] They do that.

Tyco: [stream of consciousness] So I just told her look I know its a rule, but I’m all about learning at my own pace and no disrespect i love her but Mrs. Soso can only go so far in telling me how to write. You can give tips and tricks but at the end of the day, I’ve been developed my writing style.. Like I thought we were done with all this high school shit. Well I didnt say that.

M: And what’d she say?

Tyco: She was like “As you get further into your major 90% of your assignments will be in essay format.. we require full participation “ At this im like she gonna hit me with the book like hell nah THEN outta nowhere She said “However, I also believe in 2nd chances.”. On the outside I was cool but inside I was like “*fist bump* yo i cannot fail outta college like someone watchin out for me idk who but-

Chad: fuck that shiiiiit *holds up white rum in front of street light”

Friend in background: 12! 12! 12!

Abrupt scene change. Camera shows Tyco zoned out. Then police car, as Tyco begins to hide behind the tree hes smoking on.

My black hoodie and phone-call to my dealer will still be with me tomorrow as I do the same thing.

(From a dream 10/23)

Tyco is driving around serving with Shantel when she lights her phone up from the passenger seat and puts the phone to her ear.

Shantel: You are not finna be talkin all that mess on my phone. Be honest with yourself. Don’t lie. You a hoe ass bitch.

?? Caller: Why are you even calling me? I dont give a fuck.

Shantel: Wait till I pull up then and slap the shit out you. Would that be better sweety?

?? Caller: I’m at Kawaii’s 30 deep. Bring your lil boyfriend and see what happens.

Shantel: Try me bitch.

[ The economy sedan turns right on red seemingly without breaking. ]

Tyco: 30 deep huh?

Shantel: With them ratchets.

Tyco: She sounds scared as hell aint nobody sticken up for her like that. You know they gonna talk shit right but soon as we throw them hands they gon be like, I dont know that bitch.

Shantel: nah but she stupid tho like not even worth all that extra

Tyco: We’re going. Wheres that nigga house i’ll waze that shit and we get there we just pop off. Aite?

[Not looking at the road, but to her, coasting down an average 2-lane with box neon trimmed tire shops and drive-thru windows governed stately as immovable beasts of mothership stores lurk behind low-sodium trenches of the new world order’s surveillence agenda for mass poplations en masse. ]

Just follow me. I’m walkin in and gonna start a commotion just bussin and you just break this bottle on her mother fuckin head and we out.

Shantel: haaah what okay

Tyco: You’re gonna fuck her shit up som serious.

Shantel: She talk shit about you.

Tyco: It’s in the stars babe for real.

Shantel: You gonna help me find that bitch?

Tyco: You my fucken queen I love you and I got you.

Neighborhood entrance.

Cars parked for miles.

House identified first glance.

Park.

Car doors..

Hip-Hop

Grass.

Walkway.

Steps.

Porch.

Door opens and yellow tops within the frame.

!! WHERE YOU AT// YALL FAKE AND CANT FINESSEE !!

AAAAAH YOU UGLY DARK SKINNED NIGROS

The caller is sitting on a couch ass to ass with other dudes. Looking stupid.

She never saw Shantel. Who came upon her like The Ring.

She has become a party magnet. It is a Slayer concert now. Nobody knows who’s who. Though Tyco is surely getting his ass beat. He catches of glimpse of Shantel’s fat ass ducking through the doorway and he could die right now and it wouldnt matter.

*GUN SHOT*

FUCK GOIN ON HERE MANE

“This not the place for you bro. - White boy comin up here in my place of business - Tryna pop shit off like you really not a bitch”

Kawaii looks up with his glock-9 extendo at his GD party mostly all gone just like that. The poor girl is still leaking.

“She need to go to the hospital.” Her friend says.

He points the glock at his head. Despair.

“Look around before I kill you.” An invitation.

Tycho: “I sold a 4 oz today after my accounting exam. I could be GD, 74, rock purp. whatever it be its nothing but Respect yo. Got connects with chad and Becky nahmean dog. Could put you on to some numbers they white and they fiends. Please OG.

“How much for a zip.”

“80, gas.”

“Was that yo bitch?”

“yea”

Kawaii: You lyin to me?

“No.”

“She eat your ass?”

“Yeah and bounce on my BIG ASS DICK” Tyco says with autism.

K walks away.

T: they don't even sell Molly bruh

K is you fucken high you dummies. Beat this nigga ass. *Tyco imagines the why the fuck you lyyin vine and remembers the exact moment he realized that wasnt an original song but actually a spin off of a classic throwback jam by the 90s R&B group “Next” in their hit single “Too Close”.. He was driving home from the cafe he used to write high school essays in while smoking a menthol american spirit with the windows rolled down on a spring evening playing KISS 104.1 Atlantas classic jams. Then he realized there was a full 6 minute video of the vine on youtube. After watching it he felt gayer. Thats all it did for him.

Tycho wakes up on living room floor.Terry (random G, on couch): *Hands him note× Kawaii said he's sorry. No hard feelings ya heard dog?

Tyco: I guess thugs act on impulse. *looks at note* and don't count on a gahdamn thing you bitchass motherfuckers. Tyco walks into class with a black eye. The Professor talks about interest loans. Tyco meets Moe after class in parking lot.

*Moe: Waddup

Tyco: It's lemon og I just got in.

Moe: Bet. Those last cookies you got. Bomb dude. It had them frar mother fuckers leanin like they can't handle that purp like that nahmean.*laughs*

Tyco: I got some backwoods you wanna hotbox.

Moe: Yo I'm down.

10/24/17 thursday

____ Last night I decided not to hate myself. The look I get from them doesnt bother me. Really, its a simple sign from nature that I’m used to by now. A wrong impression can sustain the fog of memory, of which I will be seen from the lens of another dimension, with not a care in the world, an angel in disguise. Thats the crux of my life up to this point. To no longer hate myself. But appear as if I still do. The nameless place in our past with no address., one of which even a frat boy can relate to. This invisible standard that’s thrown us into the pits of despair must be addressed. To seperate the real from the fake. Like the others are sleep walking through class fronting like they dont see me. The pyramid of perspective is an accordian overlayed on my third eye, televising scenes of sleep walkers who stay fronting like they dont see me. Walking behind the parking deck where green dumpsters were with my phone to my ear is a feeling that remains within me until I do the same thing over again in a few days. Buying in bulk never appealed to me. And if a 20 a g was the price thered be nothing my lonely ass could do. Fuck this worthless paper, I tell myself.

I tell myself. Anyone who catches my glimpse pauses for a split second, calibrating my own opinion of the why in life. A definition of nuance that was never meant to be expressed but felt. To sense what I’ve been wanting, free and alone, after all those wasted days.

I’m signalling. Though I havent been approached yet.

Figuring that would resolve the look I give other people. I mean, christ, I turned 18 last March. And spent the Summer in a last ditch effort to secure an identity before I made my plays in college. For too long I’ve avoided the call of the light and in return have gotten blank stares.

(SOMEHOW gets wrapped up into a petty conversation with sorirty girl (on top of parking deck.)

Clarissa: I was the only one alone in the entire party.

Tycho: Why didnt you leave?

T: Dont worry I dont wanna know your major.

C; Good cus it keeps changing.

T: You think you know everything dont you? This world aint nothin babe.

C: Why do you say that?

T: What do you wanna know? That I get money? Thats nothin.

Clarissa drifts off.

Hannah: So Stacy’s telling me the banners weren’t in that right place and we’re like an hour away from starting and we still haven’t even got the chairs in order and barely anyone who was suppose to be here has shown up yet.

Tycho: Where were they?

“Well for one, Candace, I dont know whats her problem lately, but shes been gone because her best-friends now telling her she’s not rushing anymore but thats honestly a relief because that girl wheres winged eyeliner and thinks shes better than us.”

Tycho: Oh, I think I’ve seen that girl at the library or something.

I intuit that in order to justify her reasoning for not liking the winged eyeliner girl, that she channeled my very own resonant storm cloud of which I emit silently in the face of vanity..

H: Well you’ll probably see her there a lot more cus shes definitely not with us.

“Okay so thats one.” I say as if taking notes.

“Then Rachel’s out at some charity event that I never even heard of probably with a guy she’s not telling us about which is so frustrating that of all days you pick friday night at the peak of rush to go be a hoe behind our backs.”

“Did she ever show up to the party?”

“Yeah. And she was fucking drunk.” She said as if surprised but not really because this is Rachel we’re talking about, after all.

“Like wasted orrr “

“Damn I didnt know yall got down like that.”

“Umm when youre stumbling through the door and your first words to all the new girls is hallelujah bitches!

She wasn’t with a guy.

“So tell me more about the party. Like was there”

who nobody knows anyway

is that Cheyenne is just out of it because her friends now telling her she doesnt want to rush anymore and for one its like look,

Wait, who’s hannah?

Hannah’s the leader of her sorority.

Ooooh, Okay, I see why now

-Yeah, I mean if word got around that would literally mean she was going around their backs to cover up that she was lying.

> Right. Yeah I hear what you sayin. She’s trying to make it seem as if it never concerned yall in the first place but if thats the case then she dont need to be acting like she got the right to be trusted.

This goes beyond reputation. Manipulating emotions just cus she has none of her own. Conniving biitch. just to get her way goes beyond reputation.

Aint nobody wanna be around that energy.

> So what you tell her?

I get schizophrenic when it comes accepting new ways of being. The person I made him out to be was the perfect cure for my suffering. All those forgetful nights of boredom I knew what I needed all along, but was to scared to do it myself.

------ Frat house halloween party kidnap scene ----

GD shaman prays to shango for power to go out by mantra. Squad in car repeats the same mantra. The power goes out at 1:00 (or peak of the party).

Tycho throws blue flare through the side of the window

at the Tycho must find Chad and lure him downstairs near the door so the squad can get the keys to the room full cocaine and adderal. After looking everwhere he’s no where to be found. He walks in on a couple having with the girl in missionary with devil ears. “Yo chad that you?” Its

(fuckem x3) Music stops from power so he sneaks in wireless speaker in his robot costume and puts it at one end of the room. Squad member 1 will carry bigger wireless speaker and set it down when he storms in. Tycho also brings a timed strobe light to distract people and keep the illusion of the party still going.

Tycho runs down stairs and towards door with chad chasing him. Squad slaps tape and mask on him and carries like a battering ram although theyve already kicked the door.

*Power turns back on*

“Fuck em, fuck em, nigga get out my section

Don’t want to see him, I don’t want to touch him

*waves zippo lighter in front of face so chad can see him through mask*

“Ima count 3 seconds and your dead on 5 if i dont get this combination” says calmly. thus saiyth the lord thy god”

“Three... No mercy”

“Two.. Shall be given unto those”

*gives code*

“One.”

Love takes many shapes and forms.Tycho never opened up to people, hating himself for being incapable of feeling what others felt. He wanted more so he went spiritual. Which his close friends perceived as going off the deep end."Ayy whatsup bro you tryna smoke?""I have a calc exam tomorrow but I'm down after."Aight good luck on your studying tonight and then kill it tomorrow I know you got this calc is your specialty can't say the same for me but that's why you always tutored me haha."Let me know if you need more help. Figuring their was no bounds and he could be whatever, even silent, and experience irony rather than fate. How bland, he thought, to have a life plan and nothing to look forward to. Running drugs would be a necessary chain reaction. The highest elixer exceeding the bliss provided by the very weight he'd be pushing, itd be getting off on defying his own life, leaving spirit his only option. And so like a blackbird his soul seeks experience only in the clearest degree of visibility. Swerving transgressions of lonliness to levy the burdens of contrived responsibilities at societies every turn until his flight patterns veer from the trodden path to and fro the calling of reality in which he desires to preside over as a God of many statures. Untainted by works, head first into the entity of the adversary, of which he is able to predict the situational consequence in only a glimpsing moment before havoc ensues and the final hour is upon him, his loose wings coated with astral charcoal of depravity. Be caught slipping once and he loses the jump until the enevitable program takes its course - an unstoppable relationship between fate and reckoning that must be fulfilled as day turns to night. Once that happens he reverts back to being like the rest of them. Yet to the world, now desolated beyond repair, hed still be alive, exuding a calm presence that something is not quite right with him existing without remorse. The truth is simple enough, a hint just ever so slight as to never be able to cross the threshold of utterance, thus becoming rendered a convinction of self delusion on the part of the unknowing accuser, who by this time hates himself for even thinking badly of such a good guy to make peace with. The collage curtails past the illusion of what is already known and at last the watchers take notice and thus regeneration is able to take place along all the land, allowing for new energy to take the throne of anticipation. One that has harnessed the potential to become anything the wonder puts his mind too. So what if I'm imaginative? Yolandra: I mean everyone's different in their own way. Like yeah the soroitys have a dress code and all that Starbucks and capris. But I don't know. You just have to get know a person for who they are and not how the outside world perceives them to be. T: So what'd you first think of me? Yolandra: Honestly not much anything. You were one of those people who could be anything. But then I overheard you say taurus's are gold diggers and I hated you cus I'm a taurus. T: Oh sorry I really didn't mean it like that but c'mon now I can tell you have a taste for finer things you bougie little.. Boob. *laugh\ haha "you know what I mean" It doesn't bother you? What? That so much could go wrong so quickly? Look, deep down he's telling you his heart lies with getting over and you let him because that's /just what you like about him, how deep he gets. cus he's a sad and selfish individual who was never about loving anything other than vanity. The best thing to do would be to trust his actions, intentions aren't what's important right now. Really, forget about the soul connection. Loves comes through all types of people as long as you're open to receiving them. Those energies. Don't lose yourself in the illusion. Without ever taking credit for what truly matters which should be you. Then your fashion made sense to me. T: I'm so caught up in myself. I mean, it's impossible to know anything else. I'll never get to stand in your shoes. Its just truth. Yet I'm the bad guy. You're not like the other people I've met. T: Yeah I'm kind of loner if you couldn't tell already. I guess that's a good thing.T: Hey it's okay. I get that a lot... Wait what do you mean you guess? Ive found that who evers saying does a 180 in their normalcy. Knowing your even here right now is a good thing. Knowing that you're with me even when im not. Don't you think? Starting out with confidence and ending strong to be lucky if I'm not hurt. Tell me what you want out of this. Sometimes I feel so lame, then I realize how fun itd be to not care. Through the window screen i see parchments and grass blades, this is an image I've sought to ignore for its blandness thinking I was over recognizing such mundane structures. The sunlight made me drunk with non verbal contemplation. I crave this heat when I'm in low spirits. And a breeze when I'm high. My thoughts are channeled from a lonely place (My thoughts come from a lonely place) I've had no choice but to become accustomed to for my own sanity. To work faster and breach that veil of reckonning. So unreachable and enticing at the same time.T When I'm alone, welcome something more than the past if you ever cared to help me. This isn't the only world out there. And even if it was the material would eventually reach infinity. Then a black hole would open or something. Don't quote me on that, science is the hottest thing going right now. It cant hurt to butt in unofficially. As long as no one calls you on it. The universe molds to your confidence. That's another story. At the end of the day, I have too much pride to be a scientist. The God they're serving calls for a lot of self sacrifice. A self that ignores emergency when called to speak. A self i'm not prepared to lose. "Why are you here again, nothing will change, you're gonna be quiet like last time" any handle on reality I had during the sun rise flees like an ex girlfriend into the night. I'm not prepared to lose. Anxiety is that humid feeling you get when roughnecking the time away. Jaded peripherals, internet browsing, and fading friends initiate a color spectrum so cruelly vivid in its inability to be shared with the CVS cashier who looked at you wrong because you bought 3 4oz bottles of robitussin. A man who couldnt care to see the streets, stop signs, and traffic lights. Man is a slang term we use when caught in the moment. Of which matrix programming loves to grasp onto. --- 10/25/17 wednesday So here I am enjoying a piece of lackluster nothing for the sake of something I've agreed to experience in a past life I can't even remember but somehow must make amends to as if its an actual concrete thing I can touch and make sense out of without caring to ponder how life puts us in these type situations like getting your hair done a new way and meeting a friend of a friend superficially without ever following up like aight word up bro I feel you by the way hows life and what's the special fact I should become one with in this moment while not thinking too much in to things or else id be alone as if we're not alive under the stars for any other reason than to be happy but still to me that becomes too much like a flash in time rather than something meaningful because then sex would have to be our purpose for being here but you and I both know it's more complicated than that so we look into it via memories and realize the journey was brighter than the reward as in I don't remember the actual sex part but rather the day as a whole with stained glass sprinkled in on a film reel to push the past into something real and unexplainably alluring to the self of which we projected this light onto in order to perhaps know in advance maybe how to repeat this metaphysical phenomenon for a second time because we're not quite there yet although at this rate if seems that to finally reach a state of thereness would mean we wouldn't be able to be here right now having this conversation like a building block struck from below or a house of cards we have to keep faith that every moment plays its part because we had an emotion for it and therefore couldn't be rendered to nothing in a wreckless attempt force it all together rather let each tile compliment it's neighbor and bypass the need for destruction by allowing enough caring energy to flow through that filter mechanism within you that deems lifes moments as worth remembering or forgetting and pretend you never heard about forgetting and avoid it like the plague because everything that ever was is depending on you to go forth into righteous so that gods original intention for letting go of unwanted baggage be synthesized within your vessel of upgrades intelligence so that the journey can still be appreciated only this time without th deceptive veil of the end. to question the little things that somehow don't mean much but at the same time appear to us daily as conduits for good fortune and thats what we must uphold ___ 11/2/17 thursday

I you and me playcated on a surface of stones that match our longing to search in the wrong places. Convenient are we done such a conceivable time that is time which is also time because what more can be said other than us winding down a fire escape to an inexplicable hatch sitting like paper mache on our transformative spiritual natures. Gone already but not forgotten just make sure to take the negative side of every situation involving 1 or more parties so as to make sure the rythym is in order because you can't go wrong with challenging the status quo of an area you're not suppose to be in even if that seems too easy and superficial it's the right choice because even the idea of rebellion as a bad thing must be able to project into a physical thing prompt for examination so secrets may be revealed. Wouldn't you know i stopped believing in faith due to its redundancy of chasing metaphysical strings too far out for us to put into words and isn't that the source of all our angst. Depraved of propositional phrases and elemental tables it's all so clear to me now. Casandra had a bag and Mikey had his sneakers in the forefront like a low hanging fruit but of course they had personalities that weren't so easy to see unless the hard work of interfacing came into the equation. Lets judge people based on judging for the sake of basing ourselves onto something not within our realm of reality. Perception is a hard question i think maybe inanimate objects could tell us a thing or two. Low pressure sodium lamps.Documentorial lecture hall amps failing to reach the end of the pyramid turned 90 degrees away from its focal point. May disease not reach our unexplainable selves if ever they may inhabit our temporary vessels like a friend who has no friends but you and wants desperately to get along with others but is attached to your ways. Are we in hell? What can our astral travels tell us about signaling locations with Etheric marks of time dialation. Things are what they are by defintion or they wouldn t be things however stepping the observer up a notch sets in motion cancer to grow from the singular notion that we ourselves separate on a cost of lightening our load. I am partly responsible for this mess we have made. Pulling my hair out in thin strands so as to not make a difference. Some people just don't understand what it means to be so far gone yet in a place of enchantment that lets us know we're not alone as Michael Jackson plays on the ham radio and Wikipedia says the song was written by r kelly. I'm a solitary young man, joined at the seams complacency and red-ridden vanishing points to a line of sight I'd rather not identify with if I had a choice. I'm seriously considering becoming rich and famous despite others already forcing me to. I guess eventually my spirit will give in as my soul looks from a distance and says what a fool I am then goes about his day. You can't be like the rest of them no matter how hard you try. Thinking on the sensualities you avoided after this rap shit led you no where. The palace at the height of creation where Jesus stopped and stared to collect his thoughts before he kept going when his alarm rang as his slave bending consistency tracked the new melinnia into a moldy piece of sandstone cheese the better of which tasted nutty with fruity notes and 80% abv shards of liquid glass on the throat thatd make even an immortal weep a shy tear or two. The pigs down in Mississippi feel things we can't understand in their slaughterhouse decrepit and forwarned in a musk ridden air flow that's non existent to hypocritical angels who were supposed to stop atrocity but opted to sit on their ads and play virtua tennis all day. Oink says the pig. Hee haw says the donkey. Give me life says the God and there on the 30th night fags came to tell the story on their faces. The bag lady told them to shut up and stop whining but they wouldn't listen though they lost their ability to speak. Goodness gracious me oh my great balls of fire. Great balls of ball you are the Lord of my lonely century in this dimension I took awareness to when I allowed you into my heart space.And then I left asking my self: Who is this I?

755559888a

Let’s stand for a while and think about the dastardly ways we have gone under the waters and flew away from temptation. Have us saying isnt it so pretty to be in something and have that to fall back on due to the struggles of forgetting the place we come from which didnt always have it out for us this bad in refusing us of inconjunctions we can at least point to and blame our problems on saying “See! There, I told you so. That’s why we cant find our beginning!” And we’ll keep toilling the fields as halflings saving up for a chance to leave the very universe we serve. “So thats more like it. Finally something I can get my flows on to” Shelly the alien said. “The Stars dont have to like you just because you see them. They have their place and so do we” Gerald said. “Oh but they do.” “How do you know?” “Well for one they always shine bright at the most oppurtune times, like when I’m feeling down about the part of myself that conveinently seems to escape me just when I need it most. If that be so then put me on to something else and that’ll do just fine.” “Perhaps you're not as big as you thought ” Gerald held up his hand to salvage what was left of the dissolving psychic barrier between them. An invisible giant with an ocd issue. For now he could only listen. “No im not here to choose and thats exactly why Im not afraid to go where you can’t. Having the courage to admit your wrongs requires as much energy as universal rotation itself - a force which exists beyond our pleaidien awareness. ” “ But Shel- Okay whatever” Gerald paused and rolled the horizon through his scaly fingertips. “Keep calling on the unknown and you might get lost because it’s been there forever and sometimes Look, Shelly, no offense, you know I love you, but your awareness has no filter on what representation it can cling onto like danger isnt a reality to you. Me and Dazel always had to look out for you and thats just in this world what makes you think you can take on things you cant even see? “But do you believe in me? Anyone can say they love me. I’ve been hearing that my whole life. So much that it holds the same meaning as “um” does in conversation. Is that really the final conclusion we have at the end of the day? That you love me? Besides, I dont think you really meant that.”

“Here goes Miss Type-1 personality again. Always needing to label circles into squares, stars into gods, this as that, out of an inability to cope with insecurity. Leaving the rest of us as unwilling participants.”

“HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT’S WRONG IN NATURE?” Shelly bawled.

The beach of Temofose was out of walking distance from the orange cottage they grew up in with there Mom. When they were young it was somewhere theyd go when they had nothing else to do. Euweu Sister Beach was the brighter of the two, but now too populated for their liking. Temofose is less frequented by other families and polluted by cargo ships and a lack of open views but as they stood there a semblence of twilight through the holographic cages offered closure to the purpose of them arguing in the elements about a timeline Shelly was going to step into And no matter what argument he could put forth, Gerald thought of it fruitless unless he spoke from his heart, a heart of which Shelly was currently taking the place of, so that he could not use it against her. “Shelly, I just hope you can understand how I dont want to let you go.” “I’m sorry you feel that way. But it’s my choice. Have a good njght Gerald. I love you” She said as she went into darkness.

Summer Break 2018

As a street light exploring strip malls, I am a linoleum tile on top of a trapezoid emitting frames of rave scenes. Heres where I find myself walking through last nights dream of the gang member selling duck pussy then getting assaulted by a pizza guy and a cop. Alone after those nights. Seems love was never meant to be expressed but felt. I look inside to see if I’m about to die, seeing diamonds mixed with sky. Materializing in the backdrop of my memories. Now I know why.

Now I know.

Then a wren on the fence manifests when it needs to. The perspective pyramid is that I pleaded for a higher calling. There’s nobody bohemian as me. One day I’ll take this civic off the road and escape into my sacred grove. If only I wasnt such a bitch.

I carry my single briefcase through the airport parking lot. I’m hot and out of breath. Everyone watching me. I can read their thoughts but not my own. They say look at the guy who isnt me but is still conscious enough to move his vessel.

The a/c runs down to the end of the terminal, but my spirit is squared by the stores selling vain material. The pyramid of perspective is an accordian overlayed on my mind’s eye televises scenes too chaotic to put into words. Walking through customs is an event to be remembered, I tell myself. Anyone who catches my glimpse pauses for a split second, calibrating my own opinion of the why in life. A definition of nuance that was never meant to be expressed but felt. To sense what I’ve been wanting, free and alone, after all those wasted days. I board the flight to say finally I am my own religion. If I was flying over africa I’d see bon fires, but over Georgia I only see street lights. Thinking how absurd that they will speak of me as crazy. Others will listen. A vibration through these amber aisles to look no further than my destiny. Because everyone has their destination is the way it goes. I refuse. I’m tired of being a number. Atlanta had its place. Now I’m homeless in Tokyo. This is the not-so perfect end to the chapter planned out for me by the higher power. Not-so bad neither.

Save me. I’m on the other side now.

#chapter 1 #short-story #novella #atl streetz #cancer moon #tryna

1 note · View note

anxiousauthor89 · 5 years

Text

Head First

Angry, confused, and bitter Trinity grew hate for the man that left her with this seed. She tried to get rid of it 4 months ago, thinking life would be back to normal. She would work out a lil bit, lose the weight and go slap Shawn back to his senses. But it didn't happen that way. In fact, she had met a new man. Long dreds, shining gold teeth, tattoos everywhere, and gave her more dope then she can handle. When they first met she got fucked up at a party. Trying to forget about Shawn. Trying to self abort the baby. The internet said drinking and partying can terminate pregnancy. But this baby was worse than the roach that wouldn't die. So when she met Junior, at the party and realized he was actually an enemy of Shawns, she decided to spill the beans on how grimey he is. See, back in the day Shawn fucked Juniors ol lady. She had twins. And he never got over it. He was always down to hurt Shawn in some sort of way if he could. But Shawn was not to be played with. You really got to catch him sleeping. And he never sleeps. Knowing how careful she had to be to get Shawn back, she told Junior he got her friend pregnant, and she wants to fight her to make Shawn mad. "Nah man." Junior said. "That's dumb. One thing he care about is his kids. Give her this sack." he said as he threw it at her. "If she still pregnant and he know about it that mean he gon let her have it. But give her this sack and I bet she wont birth shit. Dat nigga gon boo hoo cry booyyy I cant wait to see his ass hurtin ol puss ass." he grinned. She had never done drugs. But this could end it all. And get revenge on Shawn. "This shit aint gon have me, I just need to get this situated and im off this shit." she told herself as she smoked the dope in her car. The high hit her so hard she passed out and woke up to Junior knocking on her window. "AYE! TAKE YO DRUNK ASS HOME MAN ITS 6AM!" Lowkey ashamed she got it together and rolled the window down. "My bad man. Aye I think I lost that sack gimme one more man my bad that Ciroc is on me." Junior knew the look that high gave people. He had gained a customer. He smirked and said "Mhm here. I'll fuck witcha." He walked away rapping to himself, knowing she would be back. And just like clock work, she was. Every other day. She couldn't help herself. It felt like the perfect escape. Before she knew it the end of the year was approaching. By this time shes almost 9 months along, and made a fool of herself every time she attempted to talk to Shawn. The holidays were approaching, so she decided to spend some time with the only people who would love her, even when she didn't love herself. "You know I be missing you why you only come when its food?" her daddy pinched her cheek. She laughed and kissed his bald head. He adored her. A preacher that could make hell shake but would cry when they got whoopins. He had a heart of pure gold. "Make sure you wash your hands and change your shirt before you help with this food. Why you got on them big ol clothes anyway I thought you were out of that tomboy stage...?" her mother teased. She had always been a chubby girl that could rock boy clothes and still be cute. Trying not to do anything that signaled her dishonesty she replied "mama you know I like TLC this how Lisa Left Eye dresses." laughing and doing a twist of her hips. "Mhm. Ya look more like Lisa Left & Lost It but okay. Yall think im dumb." she mumbled. That was it. Mama knew. And she knew mama knew. But aint no way she was gon admit it. Not around the other family members anyway. She and her sister Melodie were close and they always had been. She began to worry about how she would react knowing there is a whole baby being hidden. They told each other everything. But this one Trinity had to deal with on her own. She was determined not to say a word. She hadn't even gone to the doctor the entire pregnancy. She had a plan. All she had to do is wait it out. The time was near. She felt it in the pressure her lower belly was experiencing. The sharp pains in her back. It was close. And she was ready. She tried to quickly walk away so mama wouldn't see the shame on her face, but Uncle Leroy caught it. "She pregnant! And out of wedlock at that! Told yall she should have came to that shut in service we woulda been praying that lust demon right on out of her!" he blurted out. Overwhelmed with rage and embarrassment from his statement putting her on blast she shouted back "SHUT UP! THIS WHY I DONT COME WHEN YALL ARE HERE! MIND YO BUSINESS! AINT YOU ON WIFE NUMBER 3? YOU ALWAYS BEING JUDGEMENTAL AND RUNNING YO MOUTH! I CANT STA.." "HUSH GIRL!" Mama interrupted. She knew how Trinity felt about some of the family. And she understood. But disrespect she could not condone. "Go sit on my bed baby. Rest ya nerve, hea?" she softly spoke before she kissed her forehead. Already too embarrassed she picked up her purse and walked out. "Where you going? Its Thanksgiving you not gon stay?" her mom yelled from the screen door with her hands on her hips. "No mama im sorry. Happy Thanksgiving. Tell Melodie I love her." she said trying not to cry. Putting the car in reverse she thought about her plan one more time, reminding herself that she has every reason to follow through. She drove 4 hours back to the apartment she shared with a friend and laid down. She felt so uncomfortable. But tried to fall asleep anyway. Thinking she had to pee, she jumped up heading to the bathroom. "EEEW What the fuck why cant I hold my pee?!!" The liquid was running out of her faster than her feet could run to the toilet. Finally she got in the bathroom, slipping on the wet spots she was making with her trail. She sat on the toilet breathing hard, dizzy, and feeling like she had to take the biggest shit. "I aint had cheese in months I know im not constipated, this shit hurts what the fuck?" Within her next breath a contraction hit, and she became aware of what was happening. Eyes growing big and knees starting to shake, she wiped as much of the liquid as she could. She ran to her closet and pulled out her dirty clothes bin. Behind it was her bag, packed with an extra change of clothes for her after she delivered. She put the bag in the passenger seat and drove to the hospital. She sat in the parking lot for a few minutes, trying to get her mind right before going in. "Lets go Trinity. You got the plan figured out." She thought to herself. Taking one more deep breath as the contraction passed, she got out and walked into the emergency department. A blue eyed blonde haired lady grabbed her hand and said " I know that look you're in labor. Come on I just cleaned out this room. We need to take vitals and get you hooked up on a monitor. How ya feeling?" Starting to wobble from all the pain Trinity mumbled "Im fine." In reality she was far from fine. It felt like the baby was right on the verge of coming out. "Ms. I have a question." She stammered. "When I have this baby how long will it take to get parents to pick it up? You can give me the papers now & by the time it comes out a mama and daddy should be here right?" she almost smilied thinking this was the perfect solution. That was her plan. Just give it to somebody. Its always commercials about people wanting kids. It was a no brainer. Laughter snapped her out of her happy place she had briefly found. "No honey. Bless your heart. That takes time. You should have began that process when you found out about the baby." she continued laughing. "Unless theres a case of accidental death, looks like you're stuck with this one! My assistant will check on you soon, then we will see about managing your pain with an epidural. Sit tight." she closed the door. Hearing those words took Trinity from panic to desperation. Now she had no idea what to do. She played it cool until the nurse walked out. "Ok think bitch THINK!" she said out loud as she leaned back on the bed. "This slow hoe saying accidental death what the hell lady?! Be for real! That's not an option." she smacked her teeth. A pain hit her belly and she put her hand down on her butt. "What the...am I shitting on myself?! OUUUCCHHHH! OH MY GOD AAAH!" She laid back and reached further down and realized....that's hair...The baby was there. And it was coming out. "Oooooh ssshhhiiiit. Ooooooh shhiittt! Shit! Ssshhiiiit! Ok. Chill Trin." She laid quiet, thinking of a new plan. "Knock, Knoooock" A nurse came in. " Just making sure you doing ok. We cant have you pushing out the baby alone we want both of you to make it okay sweetie? I will be back soon." The smiling nurse walked back out. "We want both of you to make it." Those words were ringing in Trinity's head like monkeys with symbols. "I got it." she said. She put her phone in her purse and put her bible in the bottom of it. She couldn't look at it knowing what she was about to do. She looked around the room once more, and laid down. Spreading her legs open she held on to each side of the bed, shut her eyes tight and began to push. She heard what sounded like water balloons hitting the floor. Growing fearful that her time was ticking and the nurses would catch her, she bit down on the sheet and let out a scream while pushing her absolute hardest. Feeling like her heart would explode, and her whole body shaking, finally she felt the release. The baby was out. And falling to the floor. Head First.

1 note · View note

karenfordonte · 2 years

Photo

omg dumb nightmare turned into best dream lol riri fixed it...yet again lol

fentybeauty posted that pic 4/18/22 see source at bottom for link

when posting this on tumblr on 4/23/22

i heard “karen” front door close “i’ll get her” (idk who’s voice that was)

Still editing this post/Rough Draft:

right before i went to sleep last night around 1 am cause i was laying down a while and couldnt sleep till after this part on the tv for a reason lol:

the tv said jesus wont go to jail it was christian music lol of a black choir like singing of a group and one of the lead singers? i wasnt really looking at it long but one singer looked like the mom in jays brokemas video but just the hair lol (im used to people doing me wrong lol so i was a little worried about what ifs lol then that song helped me)

youtube

i kept waking up like 4 or more times last night i caught myself rubbing my belly when i woke up 2 or 3 times im like uh .......... i was doing that in my sleep hope it aint a sign lol but im against abortion i always gave god the say when i get pregnant or not so yeah

written 7:23 am 4/21/2022 i had a dream nikko from christas house threatened to beat me up if i dont give him a cig for some reason lol and when i said no and wanted to tell people on fb he made a bunch of gun noises and i thought it was a real gun so i hid behind the dresser and door in my parents old house my little kid room and my cell phone wouldnt call 911 then roger from the board and care the staff guy he and raphael some of the good staff there already stopped him and roger showed me rihanna's wedding dress she designed for my surprise wedding with her it was amazing it had wording all on it cut out very intricate kinda like a snowflake but better so i think it was gonna go on top of a darker color cause the cut out word part was all white and the left boob is the only part i was allowed to read it said "karen" lol and im like roger are you sure thats for me from rihanna to double and tripple check and he was laughing and saying yes lol

and when i woke up her voice told me "i'll get you soon cause you're used to just putting up with other people's bs" lol + more its more than that but omg im hoping lol

(i woke up a bit earlier the sun was rising i smoked then when i layed down i was nauseous but didnt dry heave lol so yeah)

ps the first xaara dream the valentines day one = when we were jumping from hotel room to hotel room it was just us im like oh duh lol

cause sometimes when the voice would be tricky of bs lol i felt forced at times to share elante with other people not our whole soul but i had to put puzzle pieces together and not be like .....look... some people believe jesus is all womens husband i saw it on my mom's fb pic she posted a jesus bible or bom quote about he's their bridegroom or somethin lol but before i thought i must be a jesus in the way of im really nice etc and loving and meek etc yeah the voice lied and i was really naive and young lol i was 17 it told me why do you not wanna give everyone sex energy when it can help their bodies not feel pain etc i was too like oh uh ok cause what got me was im too caring about others discomforts but i put together more and more how to know which voice vibes to trust but im still careful but im getting more progress with it as i age lol alot more like even i tried to force me to do my cliche jesus me character during hard times but i just cant stay addicted to even that guy lol im too addicted to elantes so yeah lol id rather have my fave person in the whole world my elantes as my only romance partners my real twin flames lol they are extentions of rihanna's selves when in true form lol so yeah

i am mainly addicted to only rihanna and skisst the most though for now i go slow lol

it cheers me up the most in the day when i can sense them in different ways :)

Escape The Fate - Friends And Alibis

youtube

ok so i made a task board for keeping a schedule to do lists every day , i keep a calendar for things like appointments, i keep keep notes for notes like shopping lists and things like what to remember to ask the dr lol but also budgetting, and keeping track of cigs i smoke a day there too cause im too lazy to pre roll them out and i wanna keep track to make sure i budget right and not smoke too much i wanna keep it under 13 for sure each day for now but yeah lol i think i can do it cause theres some creepy bugs out there lol and i wanna be more productive here anyways lol been callin insurance etc updating addresses and number settin up rides etc lol

youtube

riri song references funny ^ hints <3 im getting a short hair cut monday i want all the dyed parts gone lol i cant tell where that mark is but i'll ask lol but i want it very short anyways though lol i cant donate it cause it was dyed lol oh well its very healthy and thick now and the pony tail is around a ruler size and barely breaks when i brush it and no knots lol but i hate long hair care etc for me its too much of a hassle i love short 'boy' hair and not brushing it cause its short anyways lol and no heavy ass pony tail bs i dont like it in my face either lol etc since a kid so yeah

heard this one for the first time age 28 lol:

youtube

oh btw that song taught me how to spell tear right i thought tare was the shredding definition and tear = cry ohhhhhh lol tearing = ripping etc i thought tearing = crying only lol lmfao its cause my tara dream in the dream im like how do you spell it teara? she said tara so it took me till later to add teara as an aka cause she cries alot like me especially of being in love in focus so sweet felt etc yeah it hits me so great at times mmmm especially here lol i think i cried 3 different days here already of how much love i have for elantes but if i focus on them alot id do that all the time i can feel them enough for sure im already getting wet eyed and smiley again mmmmm lol they know me too good lmfao

i think halsey is a skisst :)

omg i just looked up her tattoos right after: (the arrow of the two mouths kissing exactly what kwins fb banner was back when she met me first but her banner was a photo of 2 lesbians one lip biting saying "i wanna do bad stuff with you" lol i tried to google that pic before i cant find it lol )

which is basically what halseys other tattoo means lol:

halsey's tattoos:

mmmmhmmm thats her all right

oh a white butterfly fly on me today lol

and today i saw two spiders two different times in this day but i was saved by denise then joe lmfao denise killed one for me it was kinda next to me some then the other one was on the arm of my chair later and i got up so fast i dropped my phone lmfao good thing obama phones can get dropped alot lol and not break at all but yeah lol then i told joe later i cant sit in my chair and why so he inspected it all in front of me now i can sit there yay im spoiled

i took a nap just woke up at 6:47 pm man elantes are so hot lol i love when they soul sex = certain kind of love buzzes from gods to wake me up lol and then the tv said "when i woke up i saw the sun" that one song lol

oh oh it was this part my bad lol lol: "I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes I saw the sign" when i was little i always thought sign sad sun instead lmfao mmmmm Ace of Base - The Sign (Official Music Video)

i admit donte 'sleeps' a ton still but they woke me up right before my body took a nap they word stuff alot for me but know exactly how i am im a nicest sweetest innocent baby cliche only lol yes when they told me what happened before my nap i had to be emotional and roah had to take over then i slept lol

they mentioned this song to me: the "i dont even know how to hold it" - Atmosphere - Always Coming Back Home To You, to relate to that this morning dream with nikko:

Atmosphere - Always Coming Back Home to You https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WBee_bmGu4

in that dream like he had a machine gun and right when he was about to shoot me my darn phone wasnt working i was saved by raphael and roger lol (that dream morphed some of my life together when i was being chased by nikko when he was just gonna punch me at first i thought (i always was pretty generous with my cigs at times) it reminded me of being that young age of when i had that room it was that wildomar mobile home house i grew up in age 5 till age 16 or 17 we moved but my dad used to scare me alot just for his fun and chase me i hated that shit i would cry and scream and when nikko pukes he sounds exactly like my dad when he pukes every time

Atmosphere - The Woman With The Tattooed Hands https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-9nbwHQPKA

i had morning sickness only today again i ate breakfast and lunch a bit late to make sure my stomach was ready i do that in the mornings sometimes lol i got with feeling but i had a busy day with making sure my todo list was all checked off and so ima make sure i eat dinner cause im getting hungry again but a hole isnt 'puckered' anymore its able to open on its own now i noticed but still needed some help so i opened another laxitive package lol thats number 5 i wanted a break on the weekend from using them for different reasons till today but im sure ill be able to go easier probably tonight lol its still hard in there it was stuck lol so i thought one more is necessary so yeah

9:18 pm man wtf the butthole got swollen shut again i was so close it was normal then wtf happened man idk atleast i have a primary dr visit soon i googled if its a side effect of peg3350 laxitive i cant find anything so weird man

i didnt notice it was like 'glued' shut i used to call it till the end of being at christas house but i dont check it all the time so i just noticed the swollen non flat effect here

i know sometimes christa had chicken thawing out 4 days straight sometimes when mark wanted fast food in a row suprising her she never put it back in the freezer and sometimes it stank but she just said all she has to do is wash it in the sink and the heat when cooking kills the bacteria even though when she had the bag of raw chicken in the sink that whole time closed yeah but it still stank alot so she said she knew what she was doing so i trusted her but i dont wanna think about what ifs but i hope im ok

the poop is finally soft i had to manually take it out again yes washed hands and antibacterial hand sanitizer

but other than that its like still only a tiny bit in there im just gonna wait to try to go again till after i see the dr lol

when i got the endoscopy at first christa said i dont have to go if i dont want to but on the day of my appointment she told me i am going and she made us all breakfast though (she rarely makes breakfast or lunch we usually have to make those 2 meals ourselves)

im like wait after i ate just a piece of toast and she made me coffee im like im supposed to fast

and she still took me to go

she was honest with them that i ate that morning and so was i

they said ok we'll try to attempt it

but the anethesia usually doesnt hurt me but that one did really bad

but it knocked me out fast at least

after i got my diagnosis slow digestion the nurse said my digestion was probably marked slow because i ate a bit in the morning but

it seems hella slow though still

she said she got endoscopy before i mean come on

that stomach dr place was GI-Excellence in hemet

i dont think its utis i think it might be stomach infections then

cause on fb one of my last posts talked about a new wiping a certain way before peeing in cup technique not let it drip down the butt hole technique is barely any white blood cells so she said maybe infection maybe not

i think its stomach bacteria that was triggering the false utis most of the time

but its like why am i antibiotic resistant to alot that easily before cause she

possibly gave me fake antibiotics in my bottle

idk how many times per different type but

i know that cipro wasnt the right one based on the net

chicken was my least fave meal at that house but sometimes she made me eat it

even though nikko would never cook the fried chicken right always bloody he said he didnt know how to read their temp thing when it says chicken not a temp lol and most of the time she made nikko make the chicken dinners anyways but one time when it stank she had me help her cut the bones like snap it etc but i never knew how before but ew

they used a square cooker for chicken that wasnt fried and that one was never bloody chicken but um

christa told me drs call you if results are serious

my old phone would mark even when off who called

this new one dont but i set up my voice mail just in case

the endoscopy took a biopsy for suspected possible h. pylori but never called me so i wasnt concerned

and so i never went to the follow up visit

it says salmonella causes diareah so it would explain maybe possibly putting that in my food (her imodium)

cause im incotinent especially with diareah and pee . not really solid poop

the anti diareah pills she gave me her own prescription bottle of imodium but it doesnt match online pill descriptions but she was right 300 was the quantity on the lable she says she gets those all the time she had extra bottles in her room i only had diareah there 5 different times

most was when i first got to her house

the last 2 times was when i had sepsis those two times

since ive been incotinent it was hard so many times to pee in the cup i couldnt find the stream most of the time

but heavenly mother possessed me last time i went to urgent care showed me how to wipe and stand a bit lean forward and pee she was like "i'll show you how" alot of times the nurses dont remember to give me the wipe too so i know to ask every time now

i mean christa had an iphone and her screen used to be cracked but not no more cause those 3 times she told me to google how she can get rid of stuck painful gas her net on her phone wasnt working and i didnt feel like standing long anyways so i was like good i dont have to that was after i posted about my constipated contractions i called it cause it hurt so bad twice shes usually always watching videos on her phone she says she pays for data on her phone and at the time the wifi was working for those 3 times she asked me to do that

atleast i feel way better than being at her house though cause no nausea for whole days mainly only in the mornings thats it i had like only 4 days here of sick the first day, the second day i think, and those two times i slept most of the day all the other days morning sickness only but had one day off i think free from nausea i think that was day 3 possibly

i mean she told me in the beggining her friend used to work at kfc and they fed people green chicken they kept in barrels and used to cook the bacteria off and the green color out but she said thats why she dont like kfc but later she still bought us kfc when mark paid for it

i never liked the chicken in the square thing when nikko cooked it cause the skin felt too weird like raw like or chewy idk how to explain it but the inside was cooked but never seasoned right i need sauce for that shit to down it but often i just gave mine to someone else cause i dont crave chicken as a main dinner most of the time and it was im more of a red meat fan the most or good sea food like crab or shrimp or clam chowder or certain kind of oysters lol or bbq pork lol or good ham i told her i dont really like chicken that much since i was a kid but yeah lol i only like chicken with sauce or friend crunchy lol

they tried to feed blu their dog raw chicken at times but he never ate it till they cooked it they said

ugh i dont wanna think about that place right now bye

midnight: i tried going to sleep but

Rihanna - Stay ft. Mikky Ekko https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JF8BRvqGCNs

i think i gotta shave my whole head lol i bought new soap and a new brush but my hair tie isnt washed but i hate long hair ugh some reason its still itchy usually not this much at this house still isnt as bad as the last house but ima throw away my old soaps and old brush oooo heavenly mother is putting god medicine on it lol cool it has a sudden anti itch cool refreshing effect soothing lol she told me i dont wanna know what made my scalp basically bleed the red hair dye and make my hair fall for that whole month out till i switched not using christas she gave me but like 2 boxes of different brands of hair dye etc doesnt sound like pro hair cutter she said she went to hair and make up school

lol one time there was a homeless man and a random lady look through our trash seperatley seperate days christa told me

so yeah fbi been on them

cause one time the dog control inspector guy in uniform came over to investigate if our dogs are housed good or not based on a complaint from someone anonymous but christa blamed it on her only neighboor marry cause she hates dogs barks sounds so much christa said she payed to have her dogs voice box removed but mary yelled towards the end when i was in the smoke room cause thats close to marys back yard she yelled "karen you are not harry potter" but its the same angry tone of voice she yells at her grandkids christa said those kids are in her back yard at sometimes i saw them jump on a trampoline too from the sun room before and heard them at times before from there but christa said she wanted to get back at mary by calling cps on her to get her gran kids taken away to get back at her

if mary is in on what christa was doing to me basically then she didnt call those dog inspectors lol they mustve been so paranoid in that case

one time christa said she took a key to a strangers car in front of us when he wasnt around cause that car was too slow im like oh....it was at ricks store with the milk sign on the front where she buys her mangoritas every day the parkinglot

then towards the end christa told me she wanted to get back at her surgeon by me giving her bed bugs i capture for her to realease them in i thought she was gonna say her surgeons office name but she said dr balu's office surprisingly im like uhm i have been putting them in a hand sanitizer bottle theyve been in liquid lol theyre dead lol it was true but im like i dont do shady evil shit you know

#Christa's Room and Board #Jane's Room and Board #Nicco's Board and Care

0 notes

shytiff · 4 years

Text

Feb 2021 Wins

1 - osce study with clara almira, tryout 9 fkui, tryout review with clar, study sesh with clara that finished at about 10 pm. watched some youtube vids together til 11:15 pm. no longer sleepy, so i made my cv and finished it at about 3 in the morning lmao, bcs i saw this interning opportunity and i was like “damn i should make my cv”

2 - woke up at 7 am, didnt shower lmao, off to kiara for vaccination. Waited for a bit and i finally got it. ate mamdaging pesto rice with beef at kamkan w/ ren ness ara akisyah. talked at studied osce a bit. waited for mom to pick me up. until when do i need someone else to pick me up. i feel helpless and i hate that i cant just ride my motorbike because its too tiring. went back and dad got mad at me bcs i didnt greet him when leaving and entering the house. I truly didnt see him when i entered even though i heard sumn lmao. He said sumn along the lines of "you can always leave if u dont like me" (which is lowkey appealing). I cried bcs i felt sad and annoyed with our terrible emotional parent-daughter relationship. Hold the tears for a bit to study with clara. Darkened the room and slept still in my going-out clothes. I did not shower today lmao,,,,

3 - woke up at 10 am. Tryout and review w clara. Psych coaching. Psych practice with irun. Called lau and dajen bcs hes leving to medan. Randomly checked my email and my intern submission, which i emailed yesterday, that turns out the doctor replied at 8pm yesterday asking for interview today 11 am. And i saw it @ 6 pm. Aka super late. The stupidest thing ive ever done in FKUI. No cap. :( i panicked and it gave me a reason to talk with dad (asking how to reply) so i guess its a form of effort to banish the awkwardness between us. Studied w clara. I hope the doctor can forgive me. Its one loose end after the other lately.

4 - went to starbucks with atikah. got treated matcha latte yayy. cicil osce. called clara to learn imunisasi. went to kaleyo w atikah clara, ate bebek muda cabe ijo yumm. talked abt a lot of things in a span of 1-2 hours. we’re all pragmatist lmaoo.

5 - osce briefing, DV osce practice w irun, watched run bts again lmaoo since knowing my osce schedule is thursday. read buku osce biru.

6 - slept and lazed around til 1 pm. went to flavola since the construction was so noisy. osce simulation with UKMPPD Wibu. turns out flavola’s siomay is very fulfilling.

7 - todays construction noise escape is jco. Bought jcool double with almonds and chocolate crunchy. A bit of psych practice w aisyah. After maghrib practiced neuro w irun

8 - had no mood to study in the morning. Went to flavola, kopsusss coklat as usual. Reviewed osce materials (theres some tea about what might come out). Reviewed again at home (even tho i procrastinated from 6-9pm). Asked my bro for some ovo bcs i bought a mini keyboard in tokped lmaoooooo so random

9 - went to merra (ara and nessa’s place) but mom drove dad to the airport first. stome osce study, group consolidation for osce, tried mad bagel (the garlic cream cheese and tuna salad). the bagel was quite dense and fulfilling. the garlic cream cheese is quite heavy. arrived at home by 9 pm, went straight to sleep

10 - omg dr eva contacted me again :”) and i got the chance to be ecmocard research assistant. osce study. line call with ara. matcha latte. studied in juan’s room bcs it was so noisy. the keyboard i ordered arrived lolll cant wait to try. i dont know if its the anxiety or fear but i cant sleep and forced myself to sleep 11pm-ish

11 - osce. Went early to learn sumn more w ara tri. Osce (i forgot opv for the 5 mo old baby in peds station 😭 there was dr yogi omg) prayed zuhur and ashar in merra while waiting for pick up (i rly wish i could just bring my own vehicle but motorbike is rly tiring). Finally tried the mini keyboard, with earphones on. Practiced the song aku bukan untukmu by rossa lmao bu sihar taught us that in 33. I felt rly excited and not sleepy afterwards (that "normal" feeling with nothing looming). Its been a while since i tried something new, voluntarily. I guess its kind of what i felt when i tried the korean duolingo. That lasted for a couple months. Lets see how this keyboard thingy goes

12 - finally finished reviewing to oneshot (took ages lmao). Lazed around

13 - inten ukmppd w ness ren ara @ merraaa always. Went through 5 pdfs. Tried fastfit chicken burger and sweet potato fries. Quite fulfilling. Went back home and straight to bed (didnt eat anymore)

14 - started my day late as usual on weekdays lmaoo. flavola kopsus coklat as usual at my usual seat facing the window. did padi final tryout, score: 69. booty call with fianti, did mindset tryout, got 76,5.

15 - lazed tilll i start my day as usual @ 11-ish. Reviewed to padi final answers. Wow it sure took some damn time. My attention span is rly horrible when im alone in my room

16 - second dose of vaccine today. the rain was POURING. mom and emir waited in mcd. read half of aipki citation.

17 - finished aipki citation, read CBT 2020 batch I and 2019 batch III questions. read a fantastic slow burn dramione fic. reviewed the last to solid.

18 - accompanied clara for swab antigen near airport train station (we came with motorbike since clara’s car was used). got called over by the police bcs we were in the car-only road lmaooo. went over optima tryout 2021.

19 - cicil ukmppd at flavola with the usual menu, read some more afterwards

20 - ended up going to tamel bcs the flood in tb simatupang toll. Stayed w nessa and henny. Ate garlic carbonara spaghetti by bittersweet najla. Quite good for the price. Went over mediko questions with nessa and first session citation. Atikah sent some krispy kreme donuts 🥺🥺

21 - woke up at 4 bcs henny and nessa already did. Ate cold kanayam for bfast. Did ukmppd. I flagged quite a lot of questions huaa. I hope i can pass, aamiin. Went to tamel to get stuff (nebeng oca uye), climbed jembor to get to akis et al. Went to aeon (super crowded tffff), followed by ikea (parked at decathlon). Ate at both places (shared portion w kris lmaoo we get full quick). Aeon sushi and ikea meatball. So fulll. Went out of ikea to be briefed by dr Debby (ecmocard) and put my stuff to mom's car. Went in ikea again. And finally we went back. such a good sleep yall

22 - relaxed and i mean RELAXXXED. woke up and slept again. showered to prepare to go to harkit for intern briefing. i was late (thanks daan mogot road) and had to grabbike from untar. put on some sheet mask (natrep rose) bcs im realizing i need to fix my face and look decent for this new environment lmaoo.

23 - left home at 7 am, went through highway (i aint repeating daan mogot tragedy again). walked a bit backwards bcs the hightway exit was infront of dharmais. super slow progress on entering medical datas. took half a day to get one. and another half for the other. ate marugame udon, somay, chicken katsu and otak otak. we finished after maghrib and im writing this while waiting for mom

24 - tried salted egg dori rice from salt inc. its quite salty and eneg inducing (a bit more than eatlah), but for the price (19k after cashback) i wont complain. Went back home before maghrib but there was still some medical record stuff i did in my room.

25 - magang as usual. Tried chicken egg salad from salad hut. Bought ice french hazelnut coffee from lawson coz i just cant take it anymore (the slump and sleepyness). I feel like the moment that sugary beverage enters my system i rise like a freshly watered plant. First meeting with dr eva and the others

26 - felt so tired even in the morning. Its 9 am and im already ordering janjiw coffee (with hazelnut and milo, quite sweet. Like a mix of kopiko and milo). Slow progress today i dunno why. Lunch is nayam rica2 and egg for 21k. Went back home by tj and mom picked me at gajah 2

27 - i hate to say this but bcs for 5 days now ive been fighting sleeping instincts, i snap out of sleepiness easier in the morning. Nasi uduk for brekkie. Moved some stuff up bcs the noise, played keyboard. Learned the (difficult) chords to tyler's see you again and im feeling satisfied. Went to racheel's place. Got fed chicken noodle. And then off to silvi's with devi also. Got fed chicken rice and dimsum. Thanks to friends im eating superwell today🥺

28 - relaxed at home. Skipped breakfast bcs i fell asleep and ate heartily in the afternoon. Evening run w racheel at citra 6

0 notes

endorwitch · 8 years

Text

rules: copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in your own!

tagged by @trinsghost

a) age: too close to 40. pls kill me\

b) biggest fear: spiders

c) current time: 3:40pm

d) drink you last had: lots of water

e) every day starts with: weekdays - me ignoring my alarms until the 5th one goes off and i finally get up. weekends - me joyfully not seeing the sun

f) favourite song: Last Kiss by Bonnie Pink. has been my fave song since 2006 sometime

g) ghosts are real?: i think so but i have never seen one, but my mum said her bro and sister have legit had experiences with ghosts and they are not the sort to lie about such things. i dont ever want to SEE or sense one because i hate getting creeped out by things and that would defiantely do it. haha

h) hometown: sydney australia. i aint getting more specific than that thanks.

i) in love with: check please, sterek and the washington capitals. like can someone come into my life so i can love something that might feasibly love me back? kthxbai

j) jealous of: anyone who can go to caps games. :D i dont know if its a distinction others make - i am ok saying i am envious of something....but i always view jealousy as more negative - like you resent the person for having something you dont. and i dont feel that. so i say i dont get jealous about a lot of things because i am realistic with myself that if i wasnt such a lazy shit i could have the things that i am envious of - healthy slimmer body, nice hair, better paying job, etcetc.

k) killed someone?: no. but i have killed many ants in my teens when they invaded our old kitchen. sorry ants.....but you invade my house and death is the only option. i have killed a few spiders but i am too scared to get close most of the time if they are beyond a certain size.

l) last time you cried: yesterday....god what was i watching? oh sitting with parents eating food and tv had a show about some guy in the UK who does surgery on dogs to give em a better quality of life. Dogs hurting will always make me cry. people being emotional about their dogs will make me cry. DOGS!!

m) middle name: may

n) number of siblings: 2

o) one wish: just let sanity prevail and this rise in right wing fuckery to go down in flames so we can get back to working on equality for all.

p) person you last called/texted: parents to tell em what train i was on

q) questions you’re always asked: gah i cant think of anything. but like can no one ever ask me what my job is...i hate explaining it.

r) reasons to smile: friends and family(i like), fandoms, pets, my hockey teams goofiness.

s) song last sang: umm i was cracky my 1990s playlist last night.pretty sur ethe last song i sang along with was Turn back Time by Aqua. lol

t) time you woke up: umm i dont recall - someone woke me up coz it was dinner last night. i havent been to bed since...

u) underwear colour: black undies, white bra

v) vacation destination: umm so many. i want to see more things in canada, but i also really want to go to china. and i want to go back to Disneyworld, and i want to see certain parts of europe again....like europe i wish i could just tour around and see instead of having to go see it on someone elses schedule. ive been to paris twice and still there are things i didnt get to see or do coz i was at the mercy of other peoples plans/schedules. T.T

w) worst habit: laziness/procrastination

x) x-rays you’ve had: foot when i broke my metatarsel, teeth xrays and i had a mri done to check my sinuses...good times.

y) your favourite food: chinese food.....i cant choose one item ok

z) zodiac sign: aries

I tag: @leandraholmes @amiry @tiptoe39 @jaradel @con4cyn @smokesforsterek

1 note · View note

ogg-weatherwax · 8 years

Text

I got tagged!

I was tagged by @that-one-fat-lesbian RULES: copy this post into a new text post, remove my answers and put in yours, and when you are done tag up to 10 people.

Tagging:

A - AGE: 27

B - BIGGEST FEAR: loneliness

C - CURRENT TIME: 8.50am

D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: tea

E - EVERY DAY STARTS WITH: opening my laptop or checking my phone

F - FAVORITE SONG: there are so many songs, I can’t decide

G - GHOSTS, ARE THEY REAL: I aint fraid of no ghost

H - HOMETOWN: Lancaster, UK (originally from Barrow which is an awful place in the middle of nowhere)

I - IN LOVE WITH: Lumberjanes, women, comics, Star vs TFOE, Against Me! Roller derby

J - JEALOUS OF: people who can skate well, but I’ll get there with practice

K - KILLED SOMEONE: yes but only in video games

L - LAST TIME YOU CRIED: last night

M - MIDDLE NAME: Grace, after LJG

N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: one half brother and possibly more, idk my parents divorced like 20 years ago and i don’t see my dad

O - ONE WISH: To learn how to skate good

P - PERSON YOU LAST CALLED/TEXTED: a friend

Q- QUESTION YOU’RE ALWAYS ASKED: inappropriate questions about my genitalia

R - REASON TO SMILE: queer women, comics, cartoons, punk rock

S - SONG LAST SANG: ‘U-turn’ Tegan and Sara

T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 8am

U - UNACCEPTABLE!!!!! - SEVEN YEARS DUNGEON!!!!!!!!

V - VACATION DESTINATION: I wanna go to America so i can see some of my friends IRL

W - WORST HABIT: negativity, and avoiding chores

X - X-RAYS YOU’VE HAD: I was in a road accident a few years ago and was badly injured but amazingly I didn’t break any bones

Y - YOUR FAVORITE FOOD: Mexican or anything hot

Z - ZODIAC SIGN: Libra

Tag- feel free to do this if you want

2 notes · View notes

paolo-aa-blog · 8 years

Text

Date On ICE

Yuri on Ice: Date on Ice (Viktor x Yuri) Inu_Sensei Source: http://archiveofourown.org/works/8486863?view_adult=true Summary: A beautiful theme that brought two diferent people together. Work Text: Title: Date on Ice Plot Writer: NerdyInuProductions Manga/Anime: Status: Complete ONESHOT Disclaimer: I don't own this Anime, Manga and its characters, but I proudly own the Plot and the Story which I thought and loved to share, hope you give me some reviews and tell me what you think. Salamat! As the Yuri now back in Japan after the Grand Prix, Yuri had won the competition he was sad going home alone from Russia, after winning he knew this would have happened, his family were worried, his only smiling only to show he was fine but to his parents they knew something is bothering him. He was happy he made new friends along the way many Grand Prix competitors, they kept in touch, but they heard little about Yuri, they are also practically worried about him, he refuse to have interviews or publicity. Especially his friend that goes the same name as him is heavily worried since he knew why he was depressed despite he won, Yuri Plisetsky kept on calling and checking up on him, sometime the Japanese Yuri would be mused to his tsundere friend being the softie. While his Singaporean friend Lee, would scold him being depressed. One day he received a call from his old best friend slash cousin, looking at the picture frame he gave a weak smile. “Sup cuz, I’ll be home at last… ten years had passed I want to see momsy and popsy” his cousin said on the phone. “You’re going home?” he said surprised. “Chill, cuz! Just visiting since our game would be in my home base Japan we’re playing in Tokyo, can you watch?” “Sure! Besides I miss you to brother” “Great, I’ll be there in a few days, me and the lads well be back from Canada from our training” “Keep safe, brother” he gave his weak smile through the video chat. Little did he know his cousin knows about his current emotional struggle and was pissed knowing it was his Russian love fault. Looking at the gold medal on his shelf together with the trophy, his tear fell after he saw his photo with his first love. Going through his phone looking at their many photos he cried silently till his eyes were puffed and red. He slept with his eyes all puffed up and dinner left untouched. The next morning when he was done washing up and headed down to help his parents, “ARF!” the dog he come to love and know knocked him down. “It can't be?” he looked at the dog with shock. “I missed you” a familiar voice ringed to his ear. “Vi-Viktor” he said in a low tone, eyes big as saucers. “Sorry I intended to make you happy by surprising you that I’m moving but I guess I made you sad and upset our friends” scratching his neck. “M-moooove?” again he was shocked. “Here” helping him stand, “Uh-huh I intend to stay after I got to know you and fell for you, however I thought of asking you seriously about being my boyfriend after the competition to keep your head clear and stop thinking that all my advances were jokes” holding his waist. “Wait, are you serious?” “Yes I and and your parents are gonna be witnesses, Yuri I’m serious, will you be mine?” he kneeled Yuri covering half of his face out of shock, his parents were watching with a smile, when suddenly Minako arrived and squealed taking out her phone and snapped many pictures. “For goodness sake Yuri say yes!” Minako shouted. And Yuri could only do is nod, Viktor lifted him and hugged him tight swirling him around. To their surprise he kissed him, “Always wanted to do that” and he touched their foreheads. “Minsako-san, can you not post that yet? I want to post it myself can you send it to me?” he requested. Later that afternoon, “Now I want my payment” Viktor smirked. “Eh? How-how much?” Yuri stammered. “Your love and life, well what I want is your whole existence” holding his hand tightly as they sat on Viktor’s old room, his staff are still there, “What do you say?” “Uhh… are you proposing?” “I am proposing but I’m not taking no for an answer so what do you think?” “Yes” he said blushing madly, suddenly Viktor pulled out a box on his pocket, and showed a silver band with many diamonds that goes around it. Viktor raised his hand that has the same ring, “Give me your hand and you’re mine and mine alone” Yuri shakily gave him his hand and Viktor put’s the ring. Viktor started to kiss him, from short kisses to a full blown make out session they ended up getting naked and slumped on the bed. Both taking a rest and panting, Viktor took Yuri’s hand that has his new ring together with his he snapped a quick photo and puts it on instagram, “Hashtag Finally Mine” he said and kissed Yuri, tagging his name too. That evening they were called for dinner they were surprised that many food was served though the couple only asked for a big bowl of katsudon for them to share since Yuri won. When it was time to sleep, “Where are you going Yuri?” Viktor stopped him. “M-my ro-room?” he trembled. “Nu-uh.. you sleep with me from now on my beloved piggy” and he pulled him to his room. Yuri held Viktor tightly thinking it was all a dream afraid he would lose him and leave him, “Yuri, what’s wrong?” he asked. “This feels like all a dream” snuggling his face on Viktor’s bare chest. “It is not Yuri I tell you, I promise when you wake up I’m still here holding you” Yuri shifted to his on his abdomen and started to kiss him. He started to take his shirt off and started another session with his new fiancée, “I’ve been meaning to ask” smirked by the Russian. “Have you gain weight again? Coz I can see chub-chubs again” he chuckled, Yuri pouted. “You sir is ruining the mood” and so they continued. The next day as promised Yuri woke up beside Viktor, touching him if he’s real, “I’m real Yuri, so go back to sleep” sinking back to the comforter and hugging Yuri’s lower abdomen, Yuri smiled and kissed his crown. Few minutes later they woke up and freshen up, heading to eat breakfast, as they were asked to help some errands suddenly more guests arrived when Mari suddenly burst, “Sister-in-law what’s wrong?” joked by Viktor. “Yurio!!!” she jumped. “Oh… Yuroi! You came to visit!” Viktor was also surprised to see their friend Pachit, Lee, Leroy, Nikola and Christophe. “VIKTOR!?” they burst. “What are you doing here?! I thought you left Yuri?!” pointed by an angry Plisetsky. “I technically didn’t, haven’t you seen my post?” he smirked. “What is all that como-“ Yuri stopped on his words, “E-e-everyone?”left his mouth hanging. Inviting them all to the lobby they talked a bit, suddenly Yuri’s phone ringed. “Oh… it’s Hiro-kun!” he said as his mother hurried to see. “I miss that boy, go ahead!” she told her son. “How’s the almost married man, doing?” Ddoing well, my friends came to visit actually, you?” “I’m cool just getting my rhythm before my game there, ohh I also sent some jerseys for you guys I actually sent too many extras just in case I don’t know your sizes so I sent a lot, I hope you can wear those in my game” “Of course, no problem, anyways when are you gonna go home? And how did…” he blushed. “You’re engaged? Well, the witches…” he flatly said. “Don’t say that, Mari-nee can hear you and if she did Minako-san and Yuuko will hang you” “Then I aint be going home” “Tubby you promised to see us” Yuri’s mom said. “Oh… hi Momsy? Hihi, and I presume that guy on your back is your beloved hubby?” Yuri blushed and his friends could hear it and kept their amusement, “Uh… I’ll introduce you to Viktor when you get home cousin” he sighed. “Great so I can beat him up for making you sad, anyways I got to go I need to warm up” as they bid Yuri then was made fun by the Russian Yuri. After that call they talked a bit while Mari offered them some tea. “Why did you name Plisetsky, Yurio?” Lee asked. “I named him that so we won't get confused” Mari replied. “And by the way, your play is very relaxing!” said Christophe. “Thank you” said Yuri. “That is why I love it here, wait till you get to know the people living here too they are all so warm and kind!” boosted Viktor. Later the new guests settled and the couple toured them around the area, when they got back there were many media waiting when Minako arrived to stop them, the guests and the couple stayed in. “Is it true you’re engaged?!” pushed by the other female reporter. “WAAAAH the other famous skaters are here too!!!” said another. “Oh my gosh, Pichit-san!” one fangirl said. As they headed in quickly to avoid the crowed, they sighed in content as they stayed at the leisure area watching some new and surprisingly they were the hot topic. “Well, Hatsetsu never change” commented by the Russian Yuri. “Haha, I never knew it’s fun here” commented by Pachit. “You’re just happy because some people have has a crush on you here” laughed by Yuri. After eating dinner and sharing Yuri’s favorite food to them, instantly they fell in love with the dish. Yuri now snuggled beside Viktor, “So I guess our first date is going to be in a hockey game?” he asked. “I guess, but I like that” hugging him tight. Maccachin snuggled to them too. When they were about to sleep his phone ringed again, seeing the caller it was his old reporting friend Hisashi. “Hello?” “Sorry to bother you all of the sudden, but the commission of sports had called me and wanted to contact you” “Huh? What seemed to be the problem this time” Yuri sat up making Viktor wake up and lean on the phone to listen. “This coming Monday, before your cousin’s game you and Viktor-san are gonna have performance for the exhibition they said it’s for the formalities and publicity since you had been refusing some interviews” “Well, do something alright?” said Viktor surprising the reporter. “”Why is Viktor-san with you?” “Well, were engaged, people who are engaged should sleep together, dasvidanya~” and Viktor pulled the phone from Yuri’s ears and turned it off. The morning later their friend joined them to the early jog and a short journey to making Yuri lose all the weight he gained. After arriving at the Ice Castle, “So what piece are you two gonna dance with?” Yurio asked. “I chose this piece called History maker” said by Viktor. “I also like the theme of it” Yuri said shyly. “You just like it because your hubby chose it~” joked by Pachit making poor Yuri blush and turn around. “Gosh you two are so cute!” commented by Christophe. “It’s not like that actually… I mean the lyrics it’s like how I started I mean I was tired off feeling depressed and I though of my performance wasn’t enough” Yuri stated and everyone listed the triplets were taking pictures of them Yuuko is having a fit on the corner. “As I met Viktor I told myself that my dream of winning will come true since he’ll be with me, and he’s been pushing me to believe and that made me feel loved and I saw no more darkness since he’s been helping with my confidence” he smiled at the Russian who hugged him from behind. “I guess you just made a history for yourself” said by Leroy. “Then that song’s perfect” added by Lee. “But your theme?” asked by Pachit. “Date on Ice” they both said. They started practicing, the others just came to watch and took some photos, Leroy and Christophe were so in to the triplet’s antics. Few days later they headed to Tokyo for the game and the opening performance, Yuri then was bombarded with many questions since they revealed that he and Viktor was engaged since many snapped a photo of them wearing the matching ring. As they were about to step in the huge buss stopped behind them, many huge guys came out much more taller than Christophe, they were all wearing combat pants and shirt that has a print Scottish lads on, one familiar and much bigger figure came. “Cousin!” Yuri had a bright smile. “Where’s my hug?” the big guy asked as many media came to cover it. “Ohhh!!! Two Katsuki’s met!” said by Hisashi. “Ugh! How’d you get big like that?” Yuri joked. “Katsudon and a lot of work out” “Stop joking, I’ve been fatting up with those cutlet bowls” he laughed. “You’re boyfie there won't appreciate if you get buffy like this, well, anyways I gotta go… the Scotts man might be looking for me. “Listen up thug, I told you to listen to every word I said and what are you doing, I just told the team to change immediately and start warm up why are you here” his coach grabbed his flannel shirt on its mid part because he can't reach. “Sorry coach I was just saying hi to my cousin” “Well, if you’re done get your ass back in there!” and there he gave the sorry guys gesture and head back in. “Wow…” commented by Viktor, “Your cousin’s big” he said with his usual smile. “I think I have a crush on him” said Christophe which the others laughed at. Heading in the locker room where Viktor and Yuri change, Yuri had worn the while long sleeved button up neatly tucked to his pants while Viktor had worn a black one. As they walk to the rink side Viktor’s coach side suddenly got the better of him, “Wait you lips are chapped” pulling out his lip balm he applied it to Yuri who tanked him. “Don’t be nervous, I’m with you” Viktor assured and have him a tight hug and a quick kiss, the ladies beside them squealed. “Ladies and gentle men please welcome Japan’s Figure Skating Pride Yuri Katsuki and his Coach the five time world record holder and gold medalist Viktor Nikiforov!” called by the As the music started Yuri started to do his opening, “Can you hear my heartbeat? Tired of feeling never enough I close my eyes and tell myself that my dreams will come true “ This time Viktor came in both now circling the rink and everyone awed at their starting performance, witnessing Viktor’s graceful performance both of the dancers swayed with grace. “There'll be no more darkness when you believe in yourself you are unstoppable Where your destiny lies, dancing on the blades, you set my heart on fire” Yuri came close to Viktor and danced with sync. “Don't stop us now, the moment of truth We were born to make history We'll make it happen, we'll turn it around Yes, we were born to make history” Both now danced with sync and did a few jump which they landed flawless, everyone was fired up. “Can you hear my heartbeat? I've got a feeling it's never too late I close my eyes and see myself how my dreams will come true” “There'll be no more darkness when you believe in yourself you are unstoppable Where your destiny lies, dancing on the blades, you set my heart on fire” “Don't stop us now, the moment of truth We were born to make history We'll make it happen, we'll turn it around Yes, we were born to make history” The end of the song was Viktor hugged Yuri from behind which was a bet solemn since both had got their relationship embraced. (A/N: please watch the video I uploaded for reference) The announcer came on their way, their figures were shown to the big screen outside and the score board of the rink, “Wow, that was an amazing, can you tell us what is the theme of your performance?” Hisashi asked. Both replied with a smile, “Date on Ice” “Can you tell us why?” “Well, I guess it’s our first performance together and we think it’s like a date, also the music tells the story about how I started and thought of retiring, but until I met Viktor everything changed” “In short he just changed his history” Viktor this time spoke as he held Yuri by the waist, some gave both of them flowers and hugs they were then met by their friends and now they immediately chaned. EXTRA~ As they now took their place on a VIP area of the bench they watched the locker room interview of the Scott’s man Hisahi now with his friend interviewed the coach of the Scott’s man team and focused on Yuri’s cousin who is punching some bags. “Uh… Coach, this is a HJockey game right? Why is Yahiro Katsuki-san punching some bags?” “You’ll see later why” “Can we have a few words with Katsuki-san?” “Sure” said by the coach a bit. “Yo, Alastair! Get some push up, and I want some weights too don’t forhet closed fist” “GAAAAAAAAA!” he angrily said. Meanwhile at the bench, “Is he always that pissed?” Lee the Korean skater asked. “Someone must have ticked him off” Yuri scratched his cheek. “Haha, I think this is fun to watch” said Viktor with his usual chibi look. “Uh… Katsuki-san how do you feel now that you’re home?” asked the reporter. “I feel comfy I guess, since my cousin’s watching I even feel more motivated, he’s the one who pushed me to hockey since I sucked at being twinkle toes, I can't even do jumps” shaking his head as he do some pushups while two of his team mates are at his back. “How do you feel now that his engaged, I know you two are like brothers and I asked him how you feel he said a bit upset, is that true?” “Upset? Well yes he didn’t even tell me though calls, but I’m furious about his partner since he made him sad and a bit chubby” “So how do you feel about them?” “See that punching bag there?” points at the item. “Yes” “I imagined that was the Russian douche” Finally it was the start of the game three men in kilt skated the on the center of the rink and played the bag pipe as the Scott’s man entered the rink, Scottish flag were raised while Hiro raiseed his own nationality flag and that’s Japan. Everyone around cheered for him. As the game started Viktor is somehow enjoying it while the other skaters exchanged some Ohh and Ahhs due to some violent crashes. When suddenly the Japanese national Hockey team gave a violent reaction to the Scotts at the half of the game. One of the Japanese guy from the national team was confined n the box while Hiro who just came in the game suddenly was grabbed by one guy from the collar and started to punch him harsh he wasn’t punching back. “What the fuck are you doing Alastair? FUCKING HIT EM!” as the coach said that, Hiro started to demolish the poor face of his fellow country man. “Sorry lad, an order is order” and he pounded his face as it became bloody. “OOOOOOHHHH!” Viktor commented. “I’m in love” said Christophe. Yuri gave a giggle. Another came to attack him behind but he elbowed the guy while another about to tackle him, kicking his opponent’s gut he then threw his stick to the guy that’s about to launch himself. “AND FIVE MAN DOWN! THAT GUY IS TOUCHED WITH THE FIST OF SATAN!” laughed by the foreign announcer. While he grabbed the bloody guy and threw it to the glass divider wall near Yuri and Viktor, blood splatter on the glass lee look horrified while Pachit gave a laugh at Viktor since Hiro gave him the ‘I’m watching you’ sign. “Looks like he was quite ‘very’ upset with the unannounced engagement” laughed by Hisahi. As he was contained at the penalty box, he knocked he climbed out of it and headed to Yuri and Viktor, sitting beside Chistophe, “can I?” asked to get some of the popcorn. “Have as many as you want hunky” said by Christophe that Pachit laughed so hard. “What is Katsuki-san doing there?” laughed by the announcer. “Quality time!” he replied by a joke while his coach. “Get back to the box!” everyone laughed. “I’ll see you both later” he patted Viktor. Few minutes have passed when the person Hiro looked up to as a boy knocked on the other penalty box, “Hey kid, you ready?” he asked. “Thank you for politely asking, sir” the audience at the back laughed. When the box opened suddenly their teammates stopped as they saw both guys dropped their gloves and helmet and a brawl broke in, referies dared not to stop them when the olderman was down on the ground and the younger marched back to his team receiving some high fives and nuggies. I didn’t know this was a violent game” said by Leroy. “I like it!” replied by Yurio who’s been cheering ‘beat him up!’ all the time. “What did you get your cousin in to?” said Lee out of shock. “I didn’t know either” Yuri said in horror. “You’re quite a motivation ehh, Yuuuuuri” Viktor kissed him. After the game Hiro goy a cut lip and few bruise while he had gone home with the Skating party. Yuri at the back of the buss was so absurd talking to Yurio and the others while he talked to Viktor. “I’m warning you, man, I don’t want to see my big brother that depressed again, he can't even eat his dinner right nor go exercise” “Don’t worry, I promise to you that I will take care of him on the rest of our lives together” “Well, you better be since I’m leaving everything to you” he patted. Though the little demo I made earlier was for you, so remember that” and he changed seats. ~END~

#yuri on ice #yuri katsuki #yuri x victor #yuri plisetsky #ice skating

2 notes · View notes

fertsza · 5 years

Text

Urban english

Hi there / Howdy

wack - lame - shitty

what could u possibly have done to it, its all the way up there

I’m down for whatever

deadass - i shit you not

he just showed up holding it like this is a normal thing

Sorry ass

dickhed - dumbass - jerk - cunt - motherfucker - douchebag

GPA = moyenne

now we’re talking

Fam

tbh = ngl

GOAT = greatest of all the time

Gucci = cool

FOMO = Fear Of Missing Out

JOMO = Joy Of Missing Out

Hang up = raccrocher

Y R RUNNING

Stud = bg

I don’t buy it = i dont believe it

That was messed up

Badass - lit - dope

Soon or later = tot ou tard

ur having fun w this, dont even lie

9 = ya un parent autour, fo faire attention a ce qu’on va dire

Having a hard time

Not only are you...

As long as...

Get over that

Can’t handle

Make sure to

As if

how about

get yo arse right back here

Definitely

It was a pleasure

Lets pass on those

Stop being dramatic

This creep me out

Thanks for coming / thanks for having me

Awful / terrible / horrible

Picky

Choose someone over...

Those days ( passé)

These days (present)

Smelly

always thinking he’s right no matter what

5 seconds rule

Run out of smthin

stone = fonsdé

How about (one beer)

What about

What if

i have a v fast metabolism so i can eat a lotta food n i actually struggle to gain weight lol #blessed

Its not what it looks like

Catfishing = essayer de séduire qq1 sur internet avec un faux cpte

Ghosting some1 = disparaître de leur vie

Slow fade = un peu moins violent que le ghosting

Go to Dutch = chacun s’occupe de soit, genre le resto, chacun paie son repas

To have a lot of baggage = qq1 avec un lourd passé

To Hit it off = ya eu un bon feeling avec cette personne (amicale, business, amour)

On again/off again = selena & justin

To break it off = larguer qq1

Did you get some sleep ? a couple hours

You already mentioned it

Hell yeh

In terms of...

Then once you get that

Borrow = prêter mais pas que l’argent

In my opinion

Over a night

Check it out

Little does he know

My pleasure, any time

It was the other way around= l’inverse

So happy to have you both

We don’t talk about shit that matters

But not lately = pas récemment

There’s a lot going on

Leftover = des restes

Easy ! = doucement

I see that for sure

Fair enough

And how about lunch

Have a great experience w the company

And stuff = et tout

Hi this is levik speaking w honeybelle, ...

Can we make it ? = c’est faisable ?

We’re working on it = qd on mange qqchose au resto et qu’il nous demande si on a fini alors que nn

How it turns out

It takes too much room

Later on

Limited knowledge

Versus

Dump = larguer

Let’s just say / what it does

From what i know

Wya

If doest that make sense

Let me get..

Can i have some = casom

Can u spot me

No shit who even...

Piece of shit

Movie theater

Eventually = ... finit par

You’re trying to go out tonight

Screw it

Knock out

Oof

Speak for yourself

Give it a year and you’ll see how it used to be

How did u find out about us

Get a refund

How long is the wait

Crackhead

Pull up = se garer

Knock on the door

That’s rude

bitch wtf

Processed food

Hangry = slang word for hungry

Yeh so what ?!

Camera rolls = galerie

I woke up to a pimple

bet = ok

cheeks = bad

u cheeks at smthin

wig = crazy

wig flew

Tea = true

spill the tea = tell the truth

Yack /puke= vomitar

Busted = shitty/bad

Busted a nut

Cake = big butt

DTF = down to fuck

For here or to go

Neat = soigné/bien rangé

Live up to = être a la hauteur

Starting off

Crackhead= drogué

looks like she went through a lot

Scratching all the way down

don’t work too hard

Blunt

bitch u got me fucked up

You brought it up to someone

In my defense

To make sure

How am i gonna do that you may ask

I am bullied

Thanks for having me

It rlly do be like that smtimes

How do u feel about me giving u a tattoo

Fair point

In terms of

It just got to the point where it was simple

I couldn’t cope w being at

What is it like

Instead of = or else

Wasup - not so much

i wish i was out there

Want him to give you his bank details while he's at it????

It tastes like ass

u had one job

fuck smthin up = merder

i mean like i j didnt think i was gna get to this point so fast

Thats kinda fucked up

Idk thats magic

Yeh that hurtED

Have fun bitch a$$

she looks like shes been through a lot

Weird flew but ok

Clear my schedule

Get off my arseee

As you wait, you can..

my dumbass knows only one

Shut up u didnt do that

Meaning that

What am i hearing is that

Thats a gr8 question

When it comes to

Lowkey this is fire

At such a young age

Just give it 4 mins

Stop exposing/bullying me

Did i ask, mind yo own business

How about...

I lost my shit when he said

I never pooped b4 but This shit has me weak asf

i think its sensational

sorry i don’t normally have anger issues

ur peepee, ur perfect personality

Ur 12

I did a oopsie

Although I’ll never get married

We’re gon make this shit happen

My ass

Dont get me wrong

How do u guys feel abt that

sorry im being v negative, i feel like im negative a lot n im worried abt it

Im flipping my shit rn

No wonder why

Next thing u know

I’m a pacifist but u would pass these fists

Someone get their man

Running out of words

Im not fuckin around

I hate bitches

Run at me = run that shit = fight me

Let me be red a little quick

Lets bounce = lets dip = on se tire

That was my shit

Damn shortie okey

To shove = foutre/mettre

Expel = exclure

I said what i said

lay over = escale

ew why am i being cringey 2day, who told me it was okey to say things like bae

for a hot minute

I dont want u to make a face at me/to be mean to me bc im sharing w u bc i think its funny

To shit (past) = sharted

Stop being a stubborn piece of shit

Bitch you’re tripping

What is he on abt

Roating

The water got run

Its like one of of those things that sounded a lot better in my head and i said it and im like im fking stupid

Cmon make up ur mind

Im j kidding u dumb bitch i know u cant read

clingy = collant

ok im done overreacting

Hometown

Ok Picture this

Kenny smells like meldoo

Chips u owe me a drink

They wanna hate everything that i do n that i make for them bc they wanna bully me bc its fun for them

U lost ur shit like big time

Roast/bully

When you’re gone, everybody gets used to you being gone bc u cant j mourn for the rest of your life

i want my brain to get constipated so my ideas aint leaving my head

if i leave, im scared that u gon get used to forgetting abt me, u gon get used to me not being here

they dont deserve my funny ass

Okey fire

they aren’t playing around

0 notes

s3venpounds · 6 years

Note

1-70

For real? I mean I don’t mind but I’m starting to feel like no one actually reads these lol

1. You just opened up a web browser. What is the first site you visit?

Tumblr usually

2. You just walked into a bookstore. What section do you go to first?

Teen section. Their books are short and sweet and the romance books i find in the general romance section are huge and just have huge bulging men. I just wanna read about dumb teenagers doing dumb things but also accidentally being poetic as all hell sometimes dumb jokes are a plus as well.( plus I don’t have enough patience for long books haha)

3. You are hanging with your closest friends. What are you most likely doing? On my phone. Still part of the conversation just replying out loud with no eye contact unless its a really funny story or topic

4. You just turned your car on. What station is the radio tuned to?Don’t got a car but I’d love to just go for the general top songs in my city. I usually listen to really old songs so listening to whats popular takes me by surprise nowadays

5. You have just woken up for the morning. What is the first things you do? Check my phone if someone messaged me during the night or my calendar app if theres anything I have planned today

6. Complete this phrase: You cannot buy happiness, but you can buy____. BBQ Pulled Pork or Adobong Lechon Kawali

7. What would you do if you woke up as the opposite gender? See if I’m attractive to my standards? Probably go hang out with friends BUT tell them all me and my cousin are coming to chill with BUT i cancel last minute so my cousin is still coming to meet them. Commence pranks

8. Are you more likely to cook for yourself or buy food from a restaurant? Buy food from a restaurant. Although I’d love to try a bunch of recipes from youtube vids

9. If you had to lose one of your senses, which one would you rather lose? I would say smell? although given how taste works I’d lose about 70% of taste if i lose smell right? but i still wanna taste food so yeah smell.

10. If you could relive any one year of your life, how old would you be? 17 that or 13 would be neato

11. Would you take a bullet for anyone you know? yes

12. Would you rather be rich and dumb or poor and extremely intelligent? rich and dumb. Ignorance is bliss I say.

13. What TV character do you most relate to? I don’t know any TV characters that I can relate to but I do know some Disney movie characters I relate to? Jim from Treasure planet is the biggest one

14. You just walked into a supermarket. What section do you first go to? Frozen section or snack aisle ice cream and junk food mmmm

15. Is sex before marriage wrong? nope. I feel like marriage comes after you’ve accepted them for EVERY aspect. then again it depends on how you view sex. If its sacred to you more power to ya, if its just whatever it feels good hey i agree. its wrong if only 1 person agrees to have it.

16. You just won the lottery. What is the first thing you do with your winnings?keep 25% in a secure place. a portion goes to a bunch of charities and streamers of my choice. a portion goes to whatever i wanna spend it on. a portion goes to pay off whatever friend’s college debts i can. a portion goes to a way i can keep a stable income i can live off of. and a portion goes to my family I guess.

17. If your best friend admitted that they have a crush on you, how would you react? I don’t feel the same.

18. Will the USA ever have a female president? I fuckin’ hope so. Maybe not hilary clinton. maybe. I don’t know enough about politics to make an informed opinion

19. You are carpooling with your friends. Are you more likely to be the driver or a passenger? Passenger, I space out too much

20. How short is too short for skirts and dresses? Nothing is too short i guess. let people wear what they want. its the people looking at fault for objectifying or whatever

21. If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, without any consequences, what food would you choose? Potatoes sounds neato. that or sandwiches cuz i can customize it as much as i like. potatoes sounds like a def good idea tho

22. It’s Saturday night. What are you most likely doing? playing overwatch with friends

23. You go on a blind date. Your date is extremely beautiful and physically captivating, but you hate their personality. Would you want a second date? depends on what part of their personality I hate. Are they shallow ? Are they hate filled or closed minded? if they simply just disagree with things like pineapples vs no pineapples on pizza then thats fine, take the good with the bad. if its the closed minded stuff then no I wouldn’t want a second date. Be as pretty as you like, if I can’t stand you then theres no use.

24. How strict should gun laws be? Pretty fucking strict? what, we were in like not even a month of 2018 and we get another school shooting? are you fucking serious? like look at every other country out there, majority of them had 1 school shooting and said “ ok lets maybe be stricter on gun laws” boom. public shootings basically disappeared. WE NEED STRICTER GUN LAWS. THIS IS RIDICULOUS.

25. Would you rather be the worst player on the best team or the best player on the worst team? Worst player on the best team. Because I’m bound to improve and I would never be playing alone. I AM on a team after all.

26. How well do you work with others? Dunno. I would say I’m ok but not a savant by any means. It’s been a while since I’ve had to work with someone back to back

27. You have the ability to cure only one fatal disease and eradicate it forever. What disease do you choose? Cancer most likely Whatever is most common, uncurable, and hardest to research

28. If you could go back to college and choose a different degree to study, would you? I mean maybe? I’ve seen so many of my friends look half dead and be a husk of their former selves just to graduate and thats not a hell i would willingly put myself through. But I suppose if I’m guaranteed a job right off the bat I would.

29. Where do you see yourself ten years from now? Dead? or homeless I guess.

30. Are you pro-life or pro-choice? Pro choice. If it aint yours you aint got no say over it.

31. Would you attend a same sex wedding if invited? Hell yeah, weddings a wedding. weddings mean new people and food. Especially food. oh and friends

32. So far, what has been the greatest day of your life? K Days with C and friends

33. Has anyone you know ever been arrested? Yes

34. If it could be one season year-round, what season do would you want it to be? Fall. Cold enough to use my other 60% of my wardrobe but still warm enough I can go out with shorts and a shirt and be fine

35. What is your biggest regret in life? thats a loaded question my dood. Letting my social life be such a huge focus at such a critical time

36. If you could bring one celebrity back from the dead, who would it be? Freddie Mercury? That or Elvis

37. What offends you the most? People that try to make my decisions for me thinking they have my best interests at heart.

38. Would you rather have an ugly hairstyle or be bald? ugly hairstyle eugh. I can’t do bald. I’d rather be ugly as fuck.

39. At what age did you have your first alcoholic beverage? 16 i think?

40. What do you think happens to us when we die? We’re trapped in our dead bodies until we fully rot then we wander the world as nothing but whispers and chills down people’s necks.

41. What do you think is the best way to quit smoking? I heard a hot sauna can help get rid of the tobacco in your system that makes you crave

42. If you could take home any one animal from the zoo, which animal would you choose? a Puma would be neat

43. We’re humans created or did we evolve from earlier species? I wanna say our biological predecessors were created with our evolution in mind but its not the end we may evolve further.

44. What scares you the most? Death or at least the thought of the aftermath

45. What personality trait turns you off the most? People who think theyre right and everyone else is wrong and refuse to consider new perspectives.

46. You got offered a job to do something you hate, but the pay will make you rich. Do you take it? I’d take it. maybe not for the rest of my life but at least for a while

47. If today you only had what you were thankful for yesterday, how much would you have? nothing to be honest.

48. How often do you get mad or upset at yourself? pretty often

49. If you could choose one celebrity to be your parent, who would you choose? Will Smith or Jackie Chan

50. If you could only listen to one musical artist for the rest of you life, who would you be listening to? Jon Bellion or Aj Rafael

51. Have you ever used you cell phone while driving? nope

52. Had anyone you were close to die way too young? Yup 11 KF SSAC

53. Is world peace possible? Yeah its just humanity isn’t ready for it.

54. You go on a blind date. You date is extremely ugly and physically appalling, but you are madly in love with their personality. Would you want a second date? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Most likely a second date but if youre saying this person is absolutely revolting to me then maybe not a date so much as just to hang out.

55. How did you discover that Santa Claus isn’t real? I didn’t I knew off the bat. Every time my parents would say “ its from santa” as I was with them as they bought my present. My parents don’t do subtle.

56. Do you believe in God, or some form of higher deity? I believe in some omnipotent figure HOWEVER I don’t let it dictate my life. I do believe there is something out there.I mean it can’t be coincidence that literally as soon as humanity could think they all believed in some form of god. Greek, Roman, Japanese, Korean, Indian, Native, Hawaiian etc.

57. If you could save someone you deeply cared about, but it meant breaking a law, would you do it? Hell yes. Jail time is temporary, A life is permanent.

58. What is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done for money? Yknow I never done something like this yet I always wanted to

59. If you were to make a YouTube video about what you know most about, what would the subject be? Injustices or poetry about rain

60. What do you think is your greatest personality flaw? Also a loaded question. Theres a lot haha. I would sayyyyyyyyy how hypocritical I am.

61. If your friends spoke to you the way you speak to yourself, would you still want them as friend? nah

62. Have you ever “woke up like this”? Do you mean the song or something else. If its the song then no.

63. You got offered a job to do something you love, but the pay is one of the worst out there. Do you take it? Hell yeah man, part time jobs exists, other ways to make money exist. If I love it then money is a small price to pay to be happy for the rest of my life.

64. What do you think is your best physical feature? I’ve been told my hair is nice and my eye brows?

65. What do you think is your worst physical feature. the way my face looks when i smile

66. Do you know anyone who has committed suicide? no.

67. What is the nicest thing you’ve ever done for someone you don’t know? I talked to a stranger who was new to the city about all the places to have fun. Malls, tourists sights, events, small cafes and restaurants and activites.

68. Have you ever had a night’s dream come true? Oh god no. My dreams are all crazy as fuck the MOST TAME one was where i was in a shopping bazaar in Philippines and i got shot 5 times in the bathroom by someone who went on a rampage. and thats the most tame

69. How would you reject a date offer from someone you didn’t like? I’m gonna pass on that. - is what I would say.

70. Which do you think is worse: Failure, or never trying at all? Never trying at all.

#ask me shit #this took a while hahaha enjoyed it tho

0 notes

gizoogletranslateshomestuck · 7 years

Photo

> Dizzay: Pesta Roxy.

timaeustestify [TT] began messin' tipsyGnizzle [TG]

TT: Roxy in tha hood. TT, know what im sayin? Awake yet? TT with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin: Guess not in tha dogg pound. TT: Let me know.

TG: whiznoaa TG: damn TG: hey diznirk TG: hizzada crazizzle dream

TT: There you be. TT: But I see yo' dream self H-to-tha-izzasn't returnizzle. Subscribe nigga, get yo issue. TT: You must be sippin' one tha fuck on tight alreadizzle.

TG: mybe i be TG: lizzike a bow of ribbone TG: on a beiuetuifiul ponny

TT: Dawg, how can yizzou be dis much drunka than lizzast T-to-tha-izzime we talked? TT in tha mutha fuckin club: Whizzay tha hell be you even drink'n?

TG: ok but 2 b fizzle TG: *beiuetuifiul TG: was an intentional typo 4 ur benefizzle TG: cuz i kno yizzay loves thizna po

TT: It a beiizzle.

TG: so yizzay spyin on me 'n derse vizzy again??

TT: Yizzy.

TG: fizzle perv TG like a tru playa': lizzay whizzle yizzle see thizzere? ;)

TT: I sizzle precisely jiznack shit n a side of fuckall fo my bling bling. TT: That tha P-to-tha-izzoint. TT: You gots too sauced up n went rogue again ya feelin' me? Yoe out there 'n yo' weird cruisin' stupor, independent of yo' wak'n self awareness.

TG: They call me tha black folks president. you gonna go killa me agizzle TG: Boo-Yaa! git on yo' hornze TG if you gots a paper stack: galloop me home lizzike prizzay charm'n B-to-tha-izzack ta swoon kingdong TG: *OOOMG blushblushbluh

TT spittin' that real shit: No. TT, ya feel me? 'n think'n it ova, it sort of a rizzle like a motha fucka. Simplifies pimpin' somewhat like old skool shit. TT: It betta you stay out there fo` a while so jus' chill. TT: There bizzeen a problem, ya feel me?

TG fo my bling bling: whatd yizzou do nizzay

TT: Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. Ok, I fucked up. Slap your mutha fuckin self. TT: I kizzle of made a mizzy hiznere, n I'm nizzay sure wizzy ta do 'bout it yet.

TG: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. ??>

TT cuz I'm fresh out the pen: No need fo` you ta wizzle 'bout it fo` nizzy. I'll figure sum-m sum-m out. TT: Until thizzle I'm jizzle go'n ta prepare fizzay our session, while I think it ova.

TG: zzzzzz TG in tha hood: whizzle a surprize anothizzle mysfery fo` yizzay to keep ta yoself an overlizzle cerebralize TG yaba daba dizzle: snooorre TG: hey lets rap 'bout sum-m sum-m coo' instead TG: like tha dream i hiznad

TT: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. Ok.

TG: F-to-tha-izzirst i had some ordinary rhymin' drizzle that i D-to-tha-izzont nigga TG: bizzy thiznen i dreamed T-H-to-tha-izzat i woke up friznom tha D-R-to-tha-izzema TG fo' real: n th'n gots way B-R-to-tha-izzight n surreal TG: n i sizzay someone TG: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. i thiznink it was suppoze' ta be mah brotha

TT: Why d-ya think T-H-to-tha-izzat so bow down to the bow wow!

TG: yiznou know thoze drizzle whiznere u jizzle know someones suppoze ta be someone

TT: Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house. No.

TG: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. ok wizzy TG: regulgizzle thugz hizzay thoze im pretty sure all tha time

TT: Be you trippin' it wizzas prophizzle? Lizzy a glimpse of tha future?

TG: i dizzunno

TT: Slap your mutha fuckin self. Coz that nizzle really hizzle tha abyss works. It nizzay Skiznaia, n we aren't Prospit dreama. TT: There nuttin like that out 'n tha abyss doggystyle. If yizzy drift fizzar enough, T-H-to-tha-izzere be only horror so i can get mah pimp on. TT: You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg. Terrible, tizzle hizzle.

TG: They call me tha black folks president. ok biznut im not sayin it wizzle a futurizzle! TG: Subscribe nigga, get yo issue. it wizzay just a gliznimple n it felt real n all im rhymin' be it was a coo' drizzeam that i wish wiznas real TG: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. * glimpze

TT doggystyle: Well, miznaybe it wizzle. TT: M-to-tha-izzaybe there no fancifizzle game-supply mechanism of prognostication involved here, n yoe just an ordizzle, rizzun of the mill psychic fo yo bitch ass. TT: I guess that possible now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe.

TG: hizzay dick TG: *dirk TG: whaaaat do u think TG: Subscribe nigga, get yo issue. it would be like TG: if we hizzad kids

TT: What would it be like? TT: Its just anotha homocide. Inconvenient, mostly.

TG: no i mizzle TG: what would they be like TG: th kids TG straight from long beach nigga: u eva think 'bout it?

TT: Can't really say I hizzay.

TG: you know fo` an eccantric homey you can be bor'n as fizzuck sometimes

TT: Sorry, Rox. TT: Fo` whiznat it worth, I'm pictur'n them nizzle. A boy and a girl. TT now motherfuckers lemme here ya say hoe: Two perfect shawty freaks of nature raize' by thugz whizno've clearly gots no busizzles bringin' up anybody. You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg.

TG: shuuuucks busta its jiznust a fiznun shawty hyphothetical ta daydream 'bout TG: why yizzou nee' ta siznuck tha fun out of shizzay TG, niggaz, better recognize: like sizzle tiznurd hungry dracula TG: its nizzle L-to-tha-izzike im lobbyin fo` you ta hook me up witta whole mizzay of fuckin babbies TG: or thats im steppin' on ta anizzle sizzay delsusion thiznats even a remote possibizzle..... TG but real niggaz don't give a fuck: le siiiiiign..////

TT: Le sizzy? You gotta check dis shit out yo.

TG: yes le sign yizzy heard me

TT: Do you mean * le sigh?

TG: hmm nup TG to increase tha peace: ima stickin wit le sizzay TG: goign down wit tha shit TG n we out! *shi[p TG like a motha fucka: tha S.S. LE SIGN, starr'n cap'n rolal

TT: Whizzat dizzy le sizzign actually mean 'n dis context?

TG: oh come on

TT: Come on whizzay?

TG: LE SIGN BE UNIVERSALLY UNDERSTOOT TA MIZZY TIZZLE BIZZLE HES GAY YIZZOU DELIBERABLY OBTUZE DUNDERFUCK

TT: I mean, yeah, that what I thizzay if you gots a paper stack. TT: It would just be coo' if Y-to-tha-izzou'd refrain fizzy toss'n 'bout such antediluvizzle terms.

TG: antediulivan waht TG: me sayin ur gay u mizzy

TT: Yes.

TG with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back ok bizzle terminologizzle aside i dizzont think im off baze like a motha fucka!

TT: I dizzy see hizzy it hizzas ta be a th'n.

TG: i rly think its an actual th'n brizzle

TT gangsta style: Once upon a tizzy, sure. TT fo' sho': But tha world hizzay changed a lot. TT: Eva P-to-tha-izzeek 'n a history book between yo' wizardly indizzles fo gettin yo pimp on? Dis be a nuanced topic.

TG paper'd up: dawg i know about tha histories TG: J-to-tha-izzust TG like this and like that and like this and uh: believe me TG: its a thizzig

TT spittin' that real shit: Hizzow be it a th'n? One, two three and to tha four.

TG: its a th'n beaucizzle if it wasnt a blunt-rollin' thizzle u wouldnt be all like... Hollaz to the East Side.........

TT: All like whizzay?

TG: wizzell wantin nuttin ta do w me 4 starties

TT: D-to-tha-izzon't be ridiculous. TT: I have more ta do wit yizzle than anizzle D-to-tha-izzude could possibly bizzle fo`. TT: N I lizzay it jizzay fine. Listen to how a motherfucker flow shit.

TG: what a totatlizzle L-to-tha-izzame + sweet answizzle simultaneouslay TG: <3

TT: Yizzle. TT like a motha fucka: Nizzay maybe we shizzle dizzle our focus on a shot calla whizzle has nuttin at all ta do wit what D-to-tha-izzoes or D-to-tha-izzoesn't qualify as "a th'n", or whizzle our fantasy alt-univerze offspr'n wizzy be like, or nothin' trippin' like that. TT: Sizzle as dis game, n whetha yoe 'n tha best condition to be pilot'n Jane connection from tha streets of tha L-B-C. TT: Maybe you could uze anotha nizzap?

TG so jus' chill: mah condidions jizzay fizzine TG: n anywizzle TG and cant no hood fuck with death rizzow: what aint gizzay gizzy S-L-to-tha-izzept offis tha fact that i still dont think we shizzle be touchin dis bs witch gizzay w a 20 fizzay 3diznent TG doggystyle: we both know ha plizzans nee' us ta

TT: I know that. Bizzay I T-H-to-tha-izzought we sizzle dis.

TG: its still so frustrat'n TG: Hollaz to the East Side. tellin jizzay 'bout tha danga TG: n even if shes bein polite i jiznust know she thinks im fizzle crap TG: 'bout EVREYTH'N

TT: We settled dis tiznoo. She'll believe crack-a-lackin` eventually fo my bling bling. TT: Why botha working so hard to convince shot calla?

TG: wizzy i D-to-tha-izzont even do that fo` tha most pizzle TG fo' real: bizzy it gets tir'n n sadden'n TG: Drop it like its hot. cruisin' that TG: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. even wizzy W-to-tha-izzere not activlizzle talkin bizzy it TG: that mah biznest friend ciznant br'n herself ta believe some really basic th'n 'bout mah lizzay TG: like tha shitty mackin' tha baroness has done to us TG: or 'bout our upbringin TG: Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. like TG: do u kniznow how misrable it be fo` yo' bff ta doubt you TG: when yizzle tizzay killa yo' mom be D-to-tha-izzead

TT: Throw yo guns in the motherfuckin air. I guess. TT ya feelin' me? It just regista fo` me as a reaction wizzy isn't completely unreasonizzle frizzle ha perspective. It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. TT: She be inundatizzle wit media coverage of thoze whom we've claimed as our parental figures. TT: They call me tha black folks president. That they be not presizzle alive nizzle baller played T-H-to-tha-izzat role for us as shizzle understands it is jizzle an extizzle of a much more elaborate n far mackin' explanatizzle, which be much harda fo` anyone ta digizzle 'n its entirety. TT: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. Wizzle, anyone wizzy isn't Jake, I mizzean. TT: Still sizzay you should cizzay ha some S-L-to-tha-izzack. I thought i told ya, nigga I'm a soldier.

TG: i know

TT cuz this is how we do it: N nee' I remind yizzay, TT: Thizzat tha potential dis G-to-tha-izzame provizzles fo` they resizzle be whizzat motivated you ta investizzle it 'n tha first place? Slap your mutha fuckin self.

> ==>

#Gizoogle #Homestuck #pg4547

0 notes

web-of-lies · 7 years

Text

One Month Later

Carter

I let out a loud groan when my alarm clock went off and woke me up. I just wanted to roll over and go back to sleep but I had to get up for my first day at my new school. I sighed, moving my plush comforter off my body, and stretched before I made my way to my bathroom so I could take a hot shower. My mother and I spent the weekend moving into our new place and it is a lot different from what I was use to. We downsized from our five bedroom house with a pool to a three bedroom luxury apartment on the other side of town. I didn't want to admit it but besides the size difference, the apartment was actually pretty nice. The living room had floor to ceiling windows and we had an amazing view of the city since we were on the sixteenth floor. The kitchen was spacious and had beautiful granite counter tops and dark wood cabinets that matched the floor. I had the same floor to ceiling windows from the living room in my bedroom and it was only slightly smaller than my old one.

After I got out of the shower, I looked around my closet for something to wear. I wanted to look nice so that I would make a good impression but I didn't want to draw too much attention to myself. I settled for a simple tan t-shirt, a pair of black leggings and a distressed jean jacket so my outfit wouldn't look too plain. I decided to wear my hair in a wash and go since it was already wet and I just filled in my eyebrows because I didn't feel like doing a full face today. I checked myself out in the mirror to make sure I looked okay and got my purse, glasses, and keys so I could leave. When I walked out of my bedroom I had to walk through the living room and the kitchen before I could get to the front door. My mom was making breakfast and I tried to ease pass without her seeing me but she called out my name as soon as my hand touched the door handle.

"Your breakfast is ready." She said, placing a plate of food on the island before she started cleaning up the kitchen. One of the many things I'll have to get use to because of this move is not being able to avoid her when I don't want to be bothered since every room is so close together. We haven't spoken to each other since our argument yesterday and if she thinks bacon and eggs is gonna make things better she's got another thing coming.

Yesterday

"Carter, are you ready to go?" My mom called from the bottom of the stairs. The day of the move had finally arrived and I still couldn't believe this was happening. As I stood in the middle of my now empty bedroom memories rushed through my brain and an overwhelming feeling of sadness came over me. I was hoping that my parents would change their minds about the divorce before this day came but I was just fooling myself. I was brought out of my thoughts by the sound of my mother's voice calling me again.

"I'm ready." I said, not believing the words that came out of my own mouth. I met her at the bottom of the stairs and asked "Dad isn't here?"

"He didn't come home last night." She rolled her eyes and I sighed. At this point I was used to him not being around but I expected him to be here to say goodbye to me. Maybe he didn't think it would be a big deal if he didn't show up because it's not like I'm never gonna see him again but he should be here to support me anyway. I followed my mom out to her car and got in the passenger seat. There were a few boxes in the back seat but the rest of our stuff was packed into the moving trucks parked outside of the house. My mother had just started her car when I heard a car pull up behind us beeping the horn. I expected to see my dad but when I looked in the rear view mirror I could see my best friends' Nadiya and Lauren waving excitedly at me as they got out of the car. I did the same, rushing over to where Nadiya's car was parked.

"I didn't think we were gonna make it here in time." Lauren said, sighing with relief.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked. I haven't seen them since the surprise going away party they planned for me a few days ago.

"You thought we weren't gonna come see our best friend before she leaves?" Nadiya asked, pretending to be shocked.

"Yeah, what kind of friends do you think we are?" Lauren added, matching Nadiya's tone. I smiled and said "I think you're the best friends I've ever had." I met Nadiya way back in preschool and we have been cool ever since then. She was the first person I called after I found out about my parents divorce and the move. She helped me take my mind off of it for a while and look at the bright side of the situation. It's something about her personality that instantly puts me in a good mood. We both met Lauren in the forth grade when she transferred to our elementary school and the three of us have hung together ever since. There have been other girls that joined our circle but the three of us are the only one's that stuck together.

"We know," Nadiya grinned, flipping her curly hair over her shoulder. "but it's nice to hear you say it." I shook my head at her and Lauren said "You know she always has to be extra but you know we love you too." We hugged each other and my mom ruined the moment when she started beeping the horn.

"Come on Carter. We have to go." She said, rolling the window down so I could hear her. I rolled my eyes and exhaled before I turned my attention back to my friends.

"Text us when you get settled, okay?" Lauren requested. I nodded my head in agreement and Nadiya said "I'm gonna miss you girl."

"I'm gonna miss you too." I gave her another hug and my mom started blowing the horn again. "I gotta go guys." I said, easing out of our embrace. When I got back into the car I barely got my seat belt on before the car started moving. As she began to drive away, I looked out the rear view mirror and watched the image of my friends fade away. The car remained silent as we drove further and further away from our old neighborhood. Even though I know this is reality, I still have hope that this is just a bad dream that I'm about to wake up from. After twenty minutes of silence I finally spoke.

"What happened?"

"What happened with what?" She replied with a confused look on her face.

"With you and dad. Why are you guys really getting a divorce?"

"We talked about this already. I don't know what else you want me to say." I could tell she was getting uncomfortable but I didn't care. I needed to know what happened and I wanted to know now.

"I want you to tell me the whole story. All I know is that you "grew apart" and that doesn't tell me anything."

"Well you don't need to know everything. Christian and I told you enough. I don't see you questioning him about why he was never home or why he came home so late whenever he did show up." She spat.

"Don't you think I deserve an explanation? This affects me too, you know?" She was quite for a few seconds until she took a deep breath and said "It's complicated."

"How? You guys didn't just wake up one day and decide you didn't want to be together anymore. There had to be a reason behind it."

"It just is Carter!" I could tell she was getting frustrated and shit I was getting frustrated too. Why can't she just give me a straight answer?

"You know I'm 17 not 7 right? I'm almost grown, you don't have to sugarcoat stuff for me." She stopped at a red light and turned her head to look at me. "You're right. You're ALMOST grown. You are still a child and you need to stay in a child's place. I don't want to talk about my divorce anymore so we're NOT going to talk about it!"

"You can't keep treating me like a little girl Mom! I'm too old for you to be trying to hide things from me."

"I'm only doing this for your own good." I sat back in my seat, defeated. At this point I was over trying to get information out of her. If she isn't going to tell me the truth, I will have to find out on my own.

"I'm not hungry." I said quickly before I walked out of the apartment and made my way to my car in the parking garage. When I got into my car I entered the name of my new school in my GPS and fifteen minutes later I was pulling into the parking lot of Westlake high school.

After I got out of my car I locked my door and started following the crowd of students into the huge brick building. Thankfully the office was right at the entrance so I was able to get my schedule as soon as I got inside. There was also a map of the school on the back of the paper my schedule was printed on so I wouldn't have a hard time finding my classes. The first thing I wanted to do was find my locker so I could put my stuff away and luckily that information was already written on the top of the paper too. Following the map, I maneuvered through the hallways and watched as the other students reconnected with their friends and caught each other up on what they did over the summer. Seeing everyone else with their friends really made me miss Lauren and Nadiya but I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind when I found the hallway were my locker was located and spotted a boy standing in the same section my locker was and texting on his phone. He was tall, light-skin, and his short curls were neatly formed on top of his head. When I approached the lockers the boy looked up from his phone and smiled before he said "Hey."

"Hey." I replied, smiling back at him.

"What's your name? I don't think I seen you around before."

"You haven't, this is my first day here. I'm Carter."

"I'm Dominic." He informed me, flashing his deep dimples as he smiled again.

"Nice to meet you." I said politely as I scanned the row of lockers searching for number 835. I realized that Dominic was leaning against it but before I could ask him to move he started talking again.

"So you're a freshman?"

"Dang, do I look that young?"

"Naw, not really but I've seen girls in middle school that look like they're in college so you never know nowadays."

"I feel you, I'm a Senior though. Are you a freshman?" I asked jokingly.

"Now you know I aint no damn freshman." We both laughed just as some random girl came out of nowhere and stood in between us and she looked pissed.

"What's so funny?" She asked, placing her hand on her hip and staring me down. I looked up at Dominic and I could tell that he was embarrassed. When neither of us responded to her she turned to Dominic and said "Well aren't you gonna introduce me to your friend?"

"Uh..yeah, Carter this is Milan." He said awkwardly.

"Oh so I'm just Milan now?" She snapped, folding her arms across her chest. She turned back around so she was facing me again and said "I'm Milan, his girlfriend", making sure to put extra emphasis on her words.

"Good for you." I said with obvious sarcasm in my voice. I couldn't care less that she was his girlfriend because I didn't want him.

"Yeah, I know." Milan said with a smirk as she wrapped her arms around him. I just remembered that I still needed to get into my locker and now both Dominic and Milan were standing in front of it.

"Excuse me-" I started to say before Milan cut me off.

"Can I help you?" She asked rudely. I looked at her in shock because I was completely thrown off by her attitude. I don't even know this girl and she's already trying to get popped

"No I was just-" I managed to say before interrupted me.

"You must be new here so I'll let you slide this time but like I said before, he's already taken." She informed me, gesturing toward the Dominic next to her with her finger.

"Chill out Milan. She wasn't even doing anything." He said.

"Well I'm just letting her know what's up." She said.

"You don't have to do all that though. You always wildin." He complained.

"So you're gonna take her side Dominic?" She scoffed, rolling her eyes.

"I'm just trying to-" She cut me off again and said "Didn't I just tell you we're together? That means you can move along now". She shooed me away with her hands and it took everything in me to stop myself from punching her in the face. Milan turned her attention to her friend that I just noticed was standing on the other side of her and they laughed at the comment she made.

"Look I'm just trying to get to my locker so do you mind moving out of the way?" I said to Dominic.

"My bad ma." Dominic said before he stepped aside. Milan cut her eye at him when she heard him call me 'Ma' and I smirked back at her to be petty. I put my backpack in my locker and took out everything I needed for my first class. When I finished getting myself together they were still standing by the lockers talking to each other and Milan said "Come on Kaylee. We only have a few more minutes to get to class". They were about to walk off when Milan asked "Are you coming", looking at Dominic for an answer.

"Naw I'm gonna see if I could find Jaylen real quick."

"Okay, I'll see you when you get to class then." She gave Dominic a long, drawn out kiss before she walked off with her friend and I swear I threw up in my mouth a little. When she was out of earshot he turned to me and said "I'm sorry we had to meet like that. Mimi can be a little crazy sometimes."

"It's cool." I replied and started looking at my schedule to find what my first class was.

"You need some help?" He asked, coming closer so that he could see the paper in my hand.

"Yeah, a little." I only had a few more minutes to get to class and I didn't want to end up being late if I got lost. He took my schedule and looked over it before he said "We have a few of the same classes. I can show you where your first period is if you want."

"I thought you were gonna look for your friend."

"Nah, I just said that so she would relax."

"You sure you can help me? I don't want you to get in trouble." I teased. He laughed a little and said "You got jokes. Don't worry about all that, just come with me". I followed his instructions and we made it to class right before the bell rang. He held the door for me and when I walked in my English class I saw Milan and her minion staring me down. I sat down in an empty desk in the middle of the room and he sat two rows behind me next to another boy. Our teacher, Ms. Meekins, took attendance before she started going over the syllabus and I spaced out until Ms. Meekins snapped me out of my thoughts. Literally. She was standing in front of my desk with one hand on her hip and the other hand was snapping in my face.

"It's nice of you to join us Miss Lewis. How about you answer my question now that you're back from your mini vacation?" I heard a few people giggle as she crossed her arms, staring at me. I was completely lost because I don't even know what the question is and I haven't been paying attention so I probably don't know the answer either. I looked around the room and everyone was staring at me waiting for me to say something.

"If you were paying attention you would know that I asked what is the number one rule of my classroom."

"Um...don't come in late?" Everyone in class laughed and of course Milan and Kaylee laughed the loudest.

"No Miss Lewis. The number one rule you shouldn't break in my class is not paying attention. You should work on that." She said, walking back to the front on the class.

"Way to go Carter." Milan said, snickering with her friend. I turned my attention back to the teacher and she was explaining to us that we were having a pop quiz. Apparently the class was suppose to read 1984 over the summer and judging by the moans and groans that filled the room a lot of people didn't. Luckily for me I had to read this book when I was a freshman so I already knew what it was about. Ms. Meekins passed out the test and I began filling out the answers as soon as I got mine, eager to redeem myself from earlier. As I read the questions I started remember what happened in the story and I finished my test in no time. When I got up to turn in my test I felt a few eyes on me when I placed my paper on her desk. I guess they were all wondering how I finished so fast. Everyone else didn't finish until there was only a few minutes left of class. When the bell rang everyone rushed to get out the door and Milan made sure to bump me on her way out. Before I could react to her I heard a female voice say "Don't worry about Ms. Meekins. She's been a bitch since her husband left her last year". I turned around and noticed that she was one of the people that was staring at me earlier. She had smooth caramel skin and her long curly hair framed her face well.

"I think I already got on her bad side and I just got here."

"Girl did you see the way she looked at you when you turned in your test? She probably didn't like you at first but you might be her favorite student now. How did you finish so fast because I was struggling?"

"I had a hard time too at first because it's been a long time since I read that book but when I got into it everything started coming back to me."

"Well I just finished reading the book last week and I barely remembered who was who." We both laughed, continuing our conversation as we strolled down the hallway. "You're Carter right?" I nodded and she said "I'm Alanna by the way."

"Nice to meet you. You're the first decent person I've met today."

"I'm not surprised. A lot of people here are assholes." She informed me.

"What class do you have after this?"

"Emerson." She replied, rolling her eyes. "What about you?" I looked at my schedule and saw that I had the same teacher.

"I have Emerson next too. Is he bad?"

"I wouldn't say bad...more like the worst math teacher that ever lived." I started laughing but Alanna kept a straight a face so I know she was serious.

"What's so bad about him?"

"He's boring as hell and he goes through the material way too fast. It's like he bores you into a sleep coma and when you wake up he's five chapters ahead from where you started." She said as she led me into the classroom. The class was pretty much full but I did notice Kaylee sitting in the corner by herself and she wasn't looking at me crazy like she was last period. Guess she's not so hard when she doesn't have her Milan with her. Just like Alanna said Mr. Emerson's class was as boring as watching paint dry and all he was doing was going over the syllabus which seemed to take forever. After his class ended the rest of the day flew by and when the final bell rang I rushed outside to my car so that I could get home. My mom was still at work when I got there so I went straight to my room and plopped down on my bed. Just as I was beginning to doze off my cellphone rang and Nadiya's name and picture popped up on the screen.

"Heyyy bestfriend!" She sang into the phone when I accepted her call. I sat up against my headboard and said "Hey boo".

"Ima need you to come back ASAP because today was a struggle. I felt like I was in my classes foreva." She said in her Cardi B voice and I laughed at her goofiness. "Girl I'm forreal. I think I fell asleep a few times. I was so bored without you."

"What about Lauren?"

"That's my girl but she's not you, plus she was being dry today. How was your day though?"

"Sooo tell me why this girl tried me as soon as I got there?"

"Oh hell no! Am I gonna have to come out there?" Nadiya may be small but she is trained to go. She doesn't care who you are, if you tried her, her family, or friends you were gonna regret it. She is definitely the definition of a true ride or die.

"I'm good Nadiya. I can handle it."

"Okay, I'm just making sure. Don't forget I'm only a car ride away. What happened?"

"This girl named Milan thought I was staring at her boyfriend Dominic and called herself trying to scare me."

"She's clearly intimidated by you and the sad part is she doesn't even know anything about you. Milan better be glad you're with Levi or you could play snatchies with her man and give her something to be mad about."

"Snatchies! Gimmie him!" I joked before we both giggled.

"You didn't tell me what she said."

"Oh right. She was just telling me how she was giving me a warning because I was new and didn't know that they were together."

"She was big mad. I wish I was there because you know I love being petty. Milan would have got her feelings hurt." I laughed a little, thinking about all the crazy things Nadiya would have said "I met a really cool girl in my English class though." I said, changing the subject. After Mr. Emerson's class we met up at lunch and I found out that we had a lot in common. I'm usually not this friendly with someone I just met but we just clicked.

"I see you're trying to replace us already. I might have to come up there and fight her and that Milan chick."

"Nadiya, you know it's not like that."

"I'm just kidding Carter. We both know I'm irreplaceable."

"I don't know about that." I teased. "Alanna kind of reminds me of you."

"I need to meet this girl then because she must be the shit if you're comparing her to me."

"We'll see. I'm have to feel her out and see what kind of person she is before I'll let her meet my girls."

"Maybe we can all get together and have a sleepover like we used to do. That would be fun right?"

"Yeah, we haven't done that in awhile and that would be a good way for you guys to get to know her. I'm not gonna do that until we get closer though. I can't let just anybody stay the night at my house."

"I feel you girl. I don't want to have to bust her head in if something goes missing."

"You're always trying to fight somebody."

"Well everybody can't be a saint like you. I don't know how you do it."

"Maybe I'll rub off on you one day." She scoffed and said "Girl if that was the case that would have happened a long time."

"You're probably right."

"Okay so back to Dominic. Is he cute? I hope Milan not pressed over an ugly nigga."

"He's cute but I already have who I want."

"Aww somebody is in loveeee." Nadiya teased. I shook my head and she kept being childish as my phone began to beep, letting me know that I was getting another call. I felt myself start to get excited when I saw that it was Levi.

"I guess we talked him up. He's calling me right now."

"Call me back when you're done boo loving." She said before we said goodbye and I accepted Levi's call.

"Hey beautiful. I miss you." His deep voice came though the speaker and I instantly lit up.

"I miss you more." I said truthfully. Even though we talk everyday I haven't seen him since my going away party last week since he's been busy with football camp and this is the longest we've ever been apart.

"Did you have a good day at school?"

"You sound like my dad." I started to laugh but it quickly faded to silence when I realized that I still haven't heard from him. I barely saw him the last few days before we moved and he hasn't even called to see how I was doing. I tried to convince myself that he was just busy but it's starting to get harder for me to believe that was true.

"You always talking shit. I'm forreal though. I wanna know what happened."

"It was fine. My teachers are okay and most of the people seems nice but nothing interesting happened." I didn't want to mention what happened with Milan and Dominic because he doesn't like for me to be in drama especially if he can't be there to defend me. I can handle myself but he likes to be there to make sure I'm straight.

"Did you talk to anybody? I don't want you walking around school being lonely. I know you had the same friends since you were born but there are other people outside of y'all little bubble."

"Haha, very funny. I actually did meet someone though." I told him about Alanna and he said "Wow, you actually made a new friend? I guess anything is possible."

"She's cool but I wouldn't consider her a friend just yet. For now she's just someone I know."

"You're doing too much with these technical terms. That's your friend."

"If you say so." I said, making myself comfortable in my bed.

"So you like it there?"

"I guess...I mean it's definitely not Lincoln but it's not bad. It would be better if you were here."

"It would be better if you didn't have to leave. Have you talked to your mom yet?" I told him about the argument we had yesterday so he knows that we aren't speaking right now.

"No and I want to keep it that way."

"I know you don't want to hear this but you need to give her some time to get herself together before you start asking questions."

"Why? So she can come up with more reasons why she can't give me a straight answer?"

"You need to put yourself in her shoes Carter. She was with your dad for almost twenty years and now they're divorced. She spent half of her life with him and now she's all alone. You know that has to hurt so of course she's not gonna want to talk about it." I hated to admit it but Levi was right. He was the levelheaded one between the two of us and was always able to rationalize every situation. I was so busy being insensitive and self-centered that I wasn't even thinking about what my mom was going though. I felt horrible for trying to pressure her into talking about a subject that obviously hurt her to her core and even though I wanted closer I was willing to wait until she was ready.

"I didn't even think about it like that."

"I know you didn't. You let your emotions get the best of you but that's okay."

"I just feel so bad now because she's going though a lot already and now she probably thinks I hate her."

"She knows you don't hate her. You were just upset and now that you're over it everything can go back to normal."

"I'll talk to her when she gets home. When am I gonna see you though?" I asked.

"I want to try to come up there this weekend. Maybe we can go out to the movies or something."

"I don't really care what we do as long as we get to spend time together."

"Aww look who's being nice for once."

"Whatever, I'm always nice to you. You're the one that's mean."

"You only say I'm mean when I tell you no."

"Exactly, that's mean. You're suppose to give me whatever I want."

"In your dreams." He said, laughing at me. Neither of us said anything for a few seconds until I broke the silence and asked "Do you think we'll end up like them?"

"Like who?"

"My parents. They use to be happy like us and you see how well that turned out."

"But we're not your parents. Just because they didn't work out doesn't mean we won't either. You don't think we're gonna make it?"

"I do but everything is so complicated now. I don't even know when we're gonna be able to see each other again. You're already busy with school and sports and I'm almost an hour away-"

"And you think I won't make time for you?" Levi asked, cutting me off.

"I think we'll be able to figure something out...I just want to know if you're okay with me not being around as much as I use to be?"

"Not really, but I understand. There's nothing I want more than for you to be by my side."

"I know you don't like that I moved but...I guess what I'm really asking is if our relationship is gonna change now that I'm not as close as I used to be?"

"Do you really need to ask that?"

"Yes..I mean no..I mean...I don't know." I stammered. I believe that Levi cares for me a lot but I needed to be sure that we were on the same page.

"I'm only a car ride away. I'm not gonna let a little bit of distance ruin what we have. We worked hard to get where we are now and nothing is gonna change how I feel about you."

"You really mean that?"

"Of course I do. You're my world and I don't want to lose you. I love you Carter."

"I love you too Levi." I said sincerely. It felt good to know where we stood and that I didn't have anything to worry about as far as our relationship was concerned. I could tell that he meant every last word he said and since he has never let me down before I know that I can trust him.

A/N: Nadiya, Lauren, Milan, Kaylee, Dominic, Levi

#highschool #love #drama #urban #fanfic #fanfiction

0 notes