#i fucking hate ineffable husbands

[kuro-teni]

Finally finished watching good omens and even though i knew the ending it still just hits and stabs you in the chest so fucking hard

I am currently blasting a nightingale sang in berkeley square in the corner of the room

Omfg good omens season 2 is just ruining me

I love beelzebubs and gabriels speedrun relationship though

They look so cute and just perfect with each other

[snorzyy]

if i had a nickel for every time a gay show gave me a gay kiss before ruining my gay life…

id have two nickels. which isn’t alot but its FUCKING DEVASTATING THAT ITS HAPPENED TWICE

[feathered-serpents]

I’ve said before that my mom, while pretty okay with queer stuff overall, sometimes has trouble grasping that straight actors can play non-straight characters. And seeing her go through this with David Tennant as Crowley has sure been something

I think the funniest thing my mom ever said in her scandalization that David Tennant was playing (I know not technically but in her mind) a gay man was when I told her Crowley was in love with Aziraphale and she straight up responded

“No that can’t be true! Crowley did things with women that proved he was straight!”

And I am still. Trying to solve the mystery of what the fuck she meant by that because I can only remember Crowley having three meaningful interactions with women in the show

One he put in a catatonic trance

One he hit with his car

One was possessed by Aziraphale

[demonir]

Aziraphale and Crowley as the Little Twin Stars 💙⭐🩷

I got the idea in my head and couldn't get it out till I drew it.

There's a transparent more Sanrio style flat color version under the cut ↓

If you want to use the transparent version you can as long as you credit me and don't erase my name off the image 👍

[crowleybrekkers]

rewatching the final fifteen again and crying as always but holy shit it's so sad how crowley waits for him outside the bookshop

he's just staring at aziraphale and the metatron the whole time, so desperately wishing for his angel to come back to him

waiting until the very last moment when aziraphale enters the elevator

crowley is an optimist, and this scene conveys it perfectly

[sorryididntdothedishes]

neil gaiman. i fucking hate you. i can’t believe you. i didn’t know about the zionist shit or the funding cp before this, but now i can’t stop finding worse and worse things. i hope that you lose your career. you were my role model. one of my favorite people. i can’t do this rn

[andiv3r]

*sees a Good Omens fanfic that seems well-put-together and interesting* Oh! Yay! New thing to read!

*halfway into the chapter and Muriel is mentioned but using she/her* God fucking damn it.

[actual-changeling]

i think it's funny that whenever i post something about aziraphale not caring about individual humans—only humanity as a concept—the ONLY counter argument everyone always throws at me is 'he gave his flaming sword away'.

mate.

that was six thousand years ago. LITERALLY fresh out of heaven, to the only two humans in existence, who were the entirety of humanity at that point.

let's look at what he's like in more recent years, yes?

ah yes, telling a person living in an alley that her girlfriend is going to hell with a smile. what a kind person. and the wonderful follow-up which sounds like it is straight out of some conservative, capitalistic asshole's mouth.

and fun fact, someone like that has said THOSE EXACT WORDS to me at some point.

crowley asking the real questions here like always

but hey, that was 1827, maybe he was just having a bad year. or decade. or century.

what about the present day? see, crowley is terrified of gabriel and hates his guts, but do you know what he does? he answers his questions very patiently. he is kind. once he realises gabriel isn't pretending he makes him hot chocolate and tries to help him remember, he empathizes.

aziraphale's patient is non-existent. he yells at him immediately, gets frustrated with the most simple questions, refuses to interact with him and leaves crowley with him after crowley told him "what i NEED is for him to be nowhere near me". how considerate. but hey, maybe he was just having a bad time.

job! he was kind in job, right?

except that he doesn't care about job losing his house, his farmstead, all of his animals being slaughtered and only has a problem with the children dying; which he then tries to rationalize away with his fucking "that's not what god wants" shtick.

meanwhile crowley already has plans to protect the animals AND the children AND job and sitis as best he can.

the flood? perfectly alright to drown everyone, including innocent animals and children! it is god's plan, and what do a few humans mean in god's great big ineffable plan, huh?

then again, he doesn't show much empathy for god's son either when he's being nailed to the cross. french revolution and people being beheaded? oh yes, sure, dreadful—anyway i'm just here for the crepes, the dying humans are just background noise, let's not do anything about that even though it is literally my fucking job as an angel. but noooo. he got peckish and then had lunch. what a fucking hero.

'accidentally' killing a dove because he just had to shove it up his sleeve for a magic act.

someone getting shot and dying? because i was careless? don't care. anyway.

armageddon and all of humanity dying? don't care either until i realise what i personally would lose and then i suddenly give a shit.

centuries upon centuries of aziraphale piling up money and he rather terrorizes poor people than entertain giving them a single dime. crowley has to remind and talk him into it, and as thanks he gets dragged down to hell and tortured.

aziraphale is dripping kindness, isn't he? and all of this doesn't even take into account the ball—human puppet show for his own amusement, this is supervillain shit and you know it—or all the other times he ignored human suffering so he wouldn't be personally inconvenienced.

and ALL OF THAT does not take into account how fucking horribly he treats crowley before time even existed.

aziraphale is not unkind. on a big scale, he cares about humanity, he cares about being nice, being good. he wouldn't intentionally harm someone, but he does not care enough to not be careless—he IS careless, and does NOT care if it kills creatures or humans.

his own personal wants and comfort trump everything else, and that is canon, it is text, it is fact. if you have any canonical examples of aziraphale being genuinely kind simply to be kind, not to be selfishly altruistic, please do add them, i'm serious! if you think i'm wrong, prove me wrong. everything i just listed exists in canon, so please, do the same in return.

giving his sword to adam and eve six thousand years ago does not magically erase everything that came after and it does not give him a free pass to behave however he wants, no matter the cost.

[sentientsky]

tah-dah ✨✨ Crowley in casual wear, as requested by @fearandhatred (ty for the brainworms. i’m in tears). this is more of a loose sketch bc I’m very busy, but whatever lol

(also, i’m obsessed with the idea of Crowley being so stressed that he self-actualizes the growth of grey hairs)

alternate/meme versions below the cut

[tossyouforedinburgh]

the whole "you can't force us to be together, we're not ready" from Nina and Maggie, I can't believe it's taken me til the sixth watch to see that as a message from Neil to us. we have to wait for Crowley and Aziraphale to sort their shit out first.

questions from the final episode though:

which other prince of Heaven fell that makes it two? am I being dense here? (is it Crowley)

"books are like people but portable" and then Muriel is handed a book. who is in the book. who is it

it's so clear suddenly only the demons recognise the Metatron. Something is going on there. he looks like a murder hornet

now that Tumblr has pointed it out it's so obvious that Gabriel can see the cross on the statue and Beelzebub can't. why Neil why

absolutely crack theory: Aziraphale and/or his memories are in Muriel's book and that isn't Aziraphale going up to Heaven

[fellthemarvelous]

Warning: I use sarcasm when making points.

I have things to say. (And I'm going to be extremely snarky while saying them.)

Y'all, I love Crowley just as much as anyone else, but the way some people think that defending Crowley means it's necessary to villainize Aziraphale is just gross.

Yeah, Crowley is super easy to sympathize with. We all care about him.

But like...some of these Aziraphale hate takes are insane. (And no, haters, I don't actually want to hear from you unless you want to give me even more fodder to work with.)

"Aziraphale shows compassion for everyone except Crowley." (Actual footage from the very first episode, just to name one example, but okay. I guess sheltering someone who was supposed to be his mortal enemy under his wing was a senseless act of cruelty.)

"Aziraphale doesn't love Crowley." (Wait, I totally utilize my heart eyes for people I don't love too!!)

"Aziraphale has never actually trusted Crowley." (They only helped save the world together though. Weird. And then there was that time in 1941 where he trusted that Crowley wouldn't shoot him in the face while their miracles weren't working.)

"Even in second season when Crowley says "I'm a demon, I lied" Aziraphale doesn't think of Crowley's pain, he was busy being sad for himself. Before this Aziraphale even says "I'm like you now" as if being demon is worse thing than killing innocent children and animals." (Whatever the hell this is.)

This one is just really special. Congratulations on walking into the point and somehow missing it at the same time? That's exactly what makes the system so fucked up in the first place and why Crowley doesn't tell anyone that Aziraphale lied to Heaven. This moment wasn't about Crowley. It was about Aziraphale. Crowley knows the pain and trauma that comes with falling and he doesn't want Aziraphale to experience that?? Aziraphale is allowed to be scared and sad because like, I don't know if you know this, but when you've been indoctrinated into blind obedience, going against the grain is actually really fucking scary because the punishment is terrifying. This is why so many religious abuse survivors relate to Aziraphale?? Also, a demon like Hastur would have killed the animals and the children, so....

"I can not in my sane mind think that Crowley could ever trust Aziraphale with his trauma. He would never share anything that was done to him. Because chances are if he did, he would just be invalidated and belittled. Or worse, he would have been blamed even for it since he is a demon and that's what he deserves (which Crowley already believes to be true)." (What?!?!?!)

Aziraphale, most compassionate and kindest angel there is, would mock Crowley's pain? The same Aziraphale who has been mocked and abused (verbally, mentally and physically) by his superiors would turn around and do the same thing to Crowley when Crowley is the only one who has ever understood him? Aziraphale, the angel who gave the demons a chance to walk away from his bookshop without being hurt, would mock Crowley? Aziraphale, the same angel who had to sit there and listen to Shax mock him and belittle him relentlessly while he protected Jimbriel, would invalidate Crowley?

"Aziraphale only loves Crowley as an angel and not a demon." (Yeah, look how disgusted he is...planning a whole ball just so he could hold hands and dance with his demon. Eww.)

"When Crowley asks for the holy water instead of asking for why he needed something that was so dangerous he immediately jumps to conclusions and then hurts Crowley even more."

I mean other than the fact that we saw what happened to Ligur in season one when he got doused with the holy water, I can't imagine why Aziraphale would be so hesitant to hand something like that over to the love of his life. And he finally did hand it over, knowing he would never be able to forgive himself if Crowley did use it to end his own existence. Not to mention that Hell actually did plan to kill Crowley with holy water at the end of season 1. I would totally jump at the chance to give someone I love something incredibly dangerous to them, but I guess I'm built differently. 🙃 And who cares about Aziraphale's feelings on the subject anyway, am I right?

"Crowley has no reason to trust Aziraphale." (I know right? Aside from the time Aziraphale gave him the holy water even though it scared him or the time he used a human magic trick to save Crowley from having to go back to Hell again or the time he protected Crowley's identity by playing along with Bildad the Shuhite so Heaven wouldn't know he was actually a demon or all the times Aziraphale has offered Crowley sanctuary in his bookshop or when they performed their half miracle together or when they literally swapped bodies.)

"Aziraphale chose Heaven over Crowley because he thinks Crowley is beneath him." (I mean he sacrificed his own happiness to go back to Heaven too, but why bother exploring that when we can all just hate Aziraphale for doing what he thinks is the right thing to do? What even are shades of grey?)

Like I get it. I do. Aziraphale leaving was very upsetting because we wanted to see the Ineffable Husbands get their happy ending. But whenever I see people talk about how rejected Crowley feels, like Aziraphale feels rejected too. You get that, right? And I'm not saying he was right for asking Crowley to go back and become an angel again, but he wants Crowley to be safe and he mistakenly believed it would be that easy.

Just because Aziraphale has a lot to learn doesn't mean he's wrong for going back. Just because Aziraphale has flaws doesn't mean he's bad. Crowley isn't the only one suffering and heartbroken.

And we all saw that the Metatron gave him no time to begin grieving over what just happened. Instead Aziraphale turned around, put a smile on his face that didn't reach his eyes, and stepped onto the elevator because he is going to try and make changes even if he has to do it all alone.

How would revolutions get started if people saw no point in trying to change things for the better?

I leaned into bitch mode in this post. It happens.

[aziraphalalala]

I love how the Metatron is so obviously the toxic boss. Throwing down one Prince of Heaven is ok, but it happening again makes it LOOK like an institutional problem?

Honey, it’s you. You’re the institutional problem.

[metatronhateblog]

All Boxed Up

Okay, this one is going to be way quicker than my last one. I just got to thinking.

So recently I came across a lovely post made by @insanity-is-just-a-state-of-mind questioning the sheer bullshit power Crowley and Aziraphale have when performing their 'surreptitious half a miracle' on Gabriel. And I highly recommend the post because it really is a thought process with endless possibilities to get stumped by.

But actually I'm not here to talk about the contents of the post. I'm here to talk about the comments and reblogs made on that post. It seems in the spirit of trying to figure out just how our loveable idiots performed such a powerful miracle, people have come up with the most intriguing idea about how it's a possibility Gabriel had the Book of Life inside that cardboard box and how it could've effected the strength of the miracle (Here's the little addition from @drconstellation)

And all of this got me thinking about...how fucking weird that box is, and come to think of it this isn't even a fully thought out idea, more of a surreptitious half an idea, but like....the box was originally empty. Minus the fly.

Like the box was so empty Aziraphale was confused and tried to take a closer look. Nothing in there but that little fly with Gabriel's memories in it that we see hints of flying around the whole season.

Okay, I recall originally thinking that was weird but promptly forgot about it. An empty box? Who cares clearly it's not important.

And then we don't see that box again until later as the series goes on and threads start to unravel, when the box falls out of the sky into Gabriel's arms after mentioning needing to clean out his desk (to which Michael is hilariously baffled/jealous.)

It just falls down and lands into his arms. Obviously empty cause he's yet to put anything into it.

But then we see Gabriel putting something into the box (we soon find out it's the matchbox with the fly.) But we never actually see him put anything else in it.

He just picks it up, writes his message on the bottom and leaves.

(Don't get me started on all these little symbols yet in heaven. If it's an actual language then something tells me there's a smidge of a cypher for us to uncover. But honestly I don't know because it could just be random symbols meant to look like words that aren't actually.)

So we see him kinda...toss the matchbox out of the box before entering the elevator, also the only item we presumably watched him put in. So by all means that box is just empty right? Should just be carrying a fly and some sharpie on the bottom (all weirdly human and materialistic of the him compared to the sleek minimal items we see of the angels through the show, not to mention Michael's pure disgust at touching the match box, a human object.)

So then. This is where I get stumped.

Crowley and crew head back down to Earth (thanks to Aziraphale doing the little halo bit) and we see both angels and demons entering the bookshop, where we reveal to them finally that Jim is Gabriel.

But first Crowley asks Aziraphale where the box is...the boring little box that was empty when he opened it. This time, Crowley opens the box...and it's filled with stuff??? Hello?

I'm not sure if any of the stuff in this box is important or should be looked into too deeply, but...there wasn't stuff in this box before. And I don't know about anyone else, but I had completely forgotten the box was empty up until @drconstellation pointed out that the Book of Life could very well be in that box. And suddenly I was like...wait a minute the box was empty???

So why is there suddenly stuff in it when Crowley opens it? He promptly dumps it all out and turns the box upside down to see what Gabriel wrote on the bottom. And we see Aziraphale observing something on the floor, presumably from the box. But we never see the contents on the floor or what Aziraphale is looking at. He's certainly not looking at the writing on the box that Crowley is looking at.

So I have two thoughts here.

My first one being. What the fuck the box was empty why was there suddenly stuff in it? Why did I forget the box was empty, and why didn't Aziraphale seem to remember it'd been empty either??

Second.

Could this box possibly be related to the scene we just saw? Our dear little murder Hornet in Heaven opening a document that you have to be a Throne, Dominion or higher to view?

Maybe I'm just reaching. Maybe it's not relevant at all. Maybe it doesn't matter that the box was empty and suddenly it wasn't. Or maybe this is another one of those little 'slight of hands' people have been discussing from this season. Or maybe I'm just going crazy and looking for every scrap of anything I can get my teeth on.

This season has me absolutely feral. But anyways I needed to share this. I'll go back to my little hole now until I have more ideas to dump upon you people.

[kolumander]

i hate this stupid show i hate this stupid show i hate this stupid show i hate this stupid-

[theineffablepinkbeast]

How the reunion in season 3’s going to be-

[doofus-and-dragons]

A part of me is feeling a bit of religious guilt over writing a fanfic with religious figures (jesus, the virgin mary) because i grew up southern baptist (yikes, i know). But then I remember I'm writing a good omens fanfiction and I'm pagan, so the guilt goes away pretty quick (I tried to do a bunch of research on what mary would have worn in that century but there was little to nothing so i had to go the vauge route. I am really excited to fucking end this chapter ugh).