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coffeeflavoredtearsold · 6 years

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Only Know You Love Him When You Let Him Go Pt.8

It’s Quiet Uptown Part 1

PART 1 // LAST PART // NEXT PART

Read it on AO3 HERE

There are moments that the words don’t reach, there is suffering too terrible to name.

Alexander was relieved when he found out they were going to Virginia for a week. They had already been dismissed from school by Washington, who had insisted they needed to take a break after John’s death.

The night before they left, Alexander and Thomas got their bags together. It was originally just going to be him, Lafayette and Hercules going, but Alexander had refused to leave Thomas’ side since the incident, and James was coming to help out like he had been for the past week.

The most surprising thing over the past week was the depression Lafayette has seemingly fallen into. Unlike Alexander, who was doing his best to stay happy. It shocked everyone, and George had admitted that the whole Virginia trip was in hopes to help Lafayette.

When the alarm went off at 4 am so they got in at a decent time, Alexander rolled off the bed, groaning when he his the floor.

“Why-” Thomas started but seemed to think better of it. “Nevermind. I feel like I don’t wanna know.”

With a small laugh, Alexander got up and went into the bathroom, returning a few minutes later with his hair in a messy bun and one of Thomas’ sweaters on.

“Who said you could wear my sweater?” Thomas teased.

“It’s four in the morning, I’m cold, and It’s warm,” Alexander spoke with a small nip in his voice, as if he wanted to sound like a smartass, but was too tired to do so.

Thomas chuckled and smiled, deciding to let it slide. They gathered the last of their stuff and head out to Thomas’ car. When they got inside, the first thing Alexander said was, “We’re getting coffee before we get on the freeway.”

“Alex, you know you can sleep right?”

“The coffee is because I had to wake up at 4 am. With the amount of caffeine I consume do you really think a cup of coffee is going to do anything?”

Thomas laughed at that. It was true. He had even seen the man put 5-hour energy in his coffee and still be asleep an hour later. With a small nod, he drove them to the nearest Starbucks, got them both coffees, and started driving to Washington’s’ house in Virginia.

»»————- ————-««

You hold your child as tight as you can, and push away the unimaginable.

When his alarm went off, Lafayette groaned and turned back to the wall, ignoring it in the hopes Hercules would turn it off. When it only got louder, he turned around to see Hercules, holding the phone closer to his head. Lafayette snatched the phone to turn off the alarm before turning back to his wall.

“Nope.” Was all he heard before feeling Hercules pick him up. “Come on, Laf. You can sleep in the car.”

“Why do I even have to go? It’s not like there’s a reason to go. We all have school.” Lafayette complained, crossing his arms and trying to squirm out of his boyfriend’s arms.

“Laf… I know it’s been hard on all of us, but what’s really bothering you? It’s so unlike you to be like this… If it were Alex I’d understand, but it’s you…”

“Herc, it was John. When he needed us the most we all turned him away. If we had been there for him… If we hadn’t started ignoring him… Herc it’s our fault he’s gone!” Lafayette had tears in his eyes as he went on. “If we had been there for him, he would still be here. John wouldn’t have killed himself, he wouldn’t have been depressed. He may have fucked up, but he was still our friend!” Lafayette was sobbing by this point.

Hercules pressed a kiss to his forehead, holding him closer. “I know, Laf. But It’s too late. There’s nothing we can do but move on..”

Lafayette nuzzled his head into Hercules’ neck while he sobbed, shakes racking through his body. “John didn't deserve to go like that… Alexander was just holding him… He looked too peaceful… He looked too calm for our John…”

“I know Laf, I know. He didn’t deserve to go so young, but like I said, there’s nothing we can do now.” Hercules paused for a few moments. “Now come on, let’s get ready and head off. We all need this break.”

»»————- ————-««

The moments when you’re in so deep, it feels easier to just swim down.

By the time Alexander and Thomas were pulling in the driveway, it was nearing sunset. Sliding out of the car, Thomas watched as Alexander stared at the house as if he was remembering something. Thomas walked over and wrapped his arms around him. “You alright?”

Alexander nodded. “Yea, I just remember when I first came here… John was staying, and it just reminded me of when we met, ya know? The first night I was here, Laf and John kept whispering to each other.” Thomas smiled when Alexander laughed. “I didn’t realise he was hitting on me the entire time we were here those first few weeks. Laf had this whole joke about how clueless I was.”

Thomas notices Alexander’s eyes were glossy, despite the smile on his face. Deciding it would be best to get him inside, he pulled away from him to grab their bags, Alexander walking up to the house, unlocking it when he found they were the first ones there.

Alexander went straight to his room, Thomas not far behind. Thomas set their things down and closed the door, already hearing sniffles. As soon as he turned back to Alexander, he felt the small man wrapping his arms around him, seeming to decide it was safe.

Thomas pulled Alexander close as he lead them over to the bed, sitting down on it while he hugged Alexander. They stayed like that until Alexander pulled away, wiping his face with the sleeve of the sweater.

“S-sorry… Being here just reminds me so much of John…” Alexander sat down next to him, and he wrapped his arms around the smaller man.

“It’s okay. It’s alright. With everything that happened, and how well you’ve been doing you have no reason to apologise. You’re just fine Alex.” With that, Alexander nodded and looked up at him. “But I am curious. How soundproof are these walls?”

Thomas grinned when a blush arose in Alexander’s cheeks. “I dunno. Would you like to find out?”

“I suppose,” and like that, Alexander’s lips were on his.

»»————- ————-««

The Hamiltons move uptown, and learn to live with the unimaginable.

Lafayette was still half-asleep when they pulled in behind Thomas’ car. When he felt the car stop, he sat up. It was just after sundown, and they had received a call from George an hour ago saying they wouldn’t be there until tomorrow, as some work stuff came up.

He also mentioned he couldn’t get ahold of Alexander or Thomas. Hercules had snickered at that. “I wonder why.” he had said, ignoring the gasp from George.

Lafayette let Hercules grab their bags, while he walked to the door. He smiled a little when he heard one of the showers on. It confirmed what he had suspected earlier. When Hercules entered not long after, he grinned as well. They made their way to his room, closing the door behind them before breaking out in a fit of laughter.

Sure, it was childish, but it was funny all the same.

Not long after, they heard a knock at the door. Lafayette got up to go get it, almost breaking out in another fit of laughter when he notices the hickeys forming on Alexander’s neck. “Yes?” He asked,

“We were thinking about going to get some dinner since George and Martha haven’t gotten here yet.” So George wasn’t lying when he said he couldn’t get ahold of them.

“George and Martha will be coming tomorrow. Some things came up with his work.” Lafayette looked back to Hercules, who was still smiling, most likely remembering their earlier conversation.

“Alright. Well still. I’m starving, and James just texted me he’s staying with his parents tonight.” Lafayette nodded.

“Mkay. Well, we’ll get ready and meet you two downstairs in 5?”

“Okay.” Thomas turned and walked off, taking a smiling Alexander with him.

»»————- ————-««

It’s quiet uptown, I never liked the quiet before.

It turns out, Alexander hates Thomas more than he thought.

He didn’t notice the hickeys covering his collarbone and neck until Lafayette had put a scarf on him when they left. Alexander thought in the car over to the nearest Olive Garden how he was going to get payback.

He ignored it through the car ride, but when he eventually decided what would be the funniest to watch, it was worth every second. While they were walking in, Alexander had whispered “I might just have to find a way to get you back during dinner,” and had gently nipped on his ear before pulling away.

When Thomas spent the entire dinner looking nervous and worried, and Alexander feeding into it by occasionally leaning in to peck his lips or neck. Lafayette raised an eyebrow at Alexander’s actions, and he was glad nobody questioned it.

When they eventually made their way back to the car, he smiled when Thomas looked like he was about to freak out. “Did you seriously do that to fuck with me the entire time?” he asked.

Alexander tilted his head to the side and gave him the most innocent look he could. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, dear.”

Thomas ended up ignoring him the entire ride, grasping his wrist almost tight enough to bruise when they got to the house. Alexander let him, doing his best to maintain the whole innocence facade he was putting on.

When they got to the bedroom, Thomas locked the door with his free hand before pinning Alexander against said door. Alexander only tilted his head and said, “I didn’t do anything.” In the sweetest tone he could hold steady without breaking out in laughter.

He knew Thomas was annoyed with the whole thing. Alexander had been teasing him for over an hour and continued to feign innocence. Alexander let out a small whimper when he felt Thomas press a finger down on one of the more prominent hickeys. “Are you going to drop the shit?”

All Alexander could do was nod. It hurt, sure as hell, but at the same time, he liked the pain. He was almost relieved when Thomas removed his finger. It didn't last long. Right after he felt him lean down to lick the hickey, causing a shiver to run down Alexander’s spine.

“Good girl. Now, nobody was home earlier, so I guess the little test was futile. Would you like to try our little theory about soundproof walls again?” Alexander nodded again, feeling Thomas smirk against his neck.

»»————- ————-««

Jackie you would like it uptown, it’s quiet uptown.

Lafayette turned the volume up once again in a fatal attempt to drown out Alexander, who seemed to not care that there were other people in the house. He was starting to feel bad for people with dorms next to theirs.

Even Hercules, who was usually one to crack jokes about this kind of situation, seemed annoyed. Lafayette was downright disgusted. Alexander was practically his brother, and he wanted to throw up at the kind of sounds he was hearing.

Sure, he was happy for him. He just didn’t want to hear that kind of thing. Oh god, he was glad George wasn’t there. This whole thing would be so much worse.

Lafayette decided to try his best to focus on the movie, curling into Hercules’ side. “I mean at least Alex has been better lately,” he said, in a failed attempt to lighten the mood.

“Yes, but does he have to be so loud?” Hercules said, looking like he was about to put in earbuds. Alexander chose that moment to be particularly loud.

“True, but he’s happy! It’s good after everything that’s happened.” Lafayette decided to get up, taking Hercules’ wrist. “Come on, let’s head over to the gardens. I’m sure they’ll be much quieter.” With a nod, Hercules got up and followed Lafayette out into the night.

»»————- ————-««

You knock me out, I fall apart. Can you imagine?

The first thing Alexander noticed when he woke up the next morning was he had just heard the front door closing. The second thing he noticed was Thomas’ arms wrapped tightly around him. He smiled and turned around so he could face him. “Tommy. Wake up.”

He received a grumble of protest, and Thomas pulling him closer. Alexander poked his cheek. “Tommy I just heard the door close, I think Martha and George are here.” At that, Thomas shot up. Alexander laughed and got out of the bed, grabbing his things and heading into the bathroom to get ready.

When Alexander eventually emerged, Thomas was nowhere to be seen. Alexander walked out of the room, his wet mop of hair hanging around his head. The first place he checked was the living room, which ended with nothing, but he heard people talking in the kitchen, so he made his way over.

When he walked in, he smiled and went over to hug George and Martha, glad he had grabbed a turtleneck. He hoped they didn’t notice the faint marks on his jawline, biting his lip the entire time.

“So what exactly are we going to do for the next week?” He asked while he poured himself some coffee.

“I was actually thinking of sending you all off to a nearby mall. Try to get Laf’s mind off everything.” Alexander choked on his coffee, Thomas snickered.

“I’m sure Herc already has that one covered, dad.” Alexander broke out into laughter when Martha’s face paled, and George choked on his drink.

“Alexander, dear god you’re as bad as Gil…” Alexander smiled while he watched George pinch the bridge of his nose.

“I mean, we did live together for four and a half years.” George shook his head again.

“You two are insufferable.”

Thomas was the first to reply. “I’d like to second that.” He was also the first to be hit that morning.

“Thomas!” he slapped his shoulder again.

“What was the second one for?”

“Laf. Although he would have slapped you.”

“Makes sense.” Alexander smiled and sipped his coffee.

“Then I guess it’s settled. I call dibs on not being the one to wake them up.”

Alexander decided it was a safe time to leave the room since he really didn't want to be the one dealing with it. Sure, he had come to their dorm many times and heard it, but nope. He didn't have to, he didn’t want to.

»»————- ————-««

If I could spare his life, if I could trade his life for mine, he’d be standing here right now. And that would be enough.

In the end, Lafayette was the one to wake them up. Before anyone got a chance to go wake the two up, Lafayette came into the kitchen, immediately going for the bottle of Excedrin on the counter.

“You alright Gil?” George asked. Thomas looked to Lafayette with concern.

“Mhm. Herc thought it would be fun to get wasted last night after dinner.” Thomas laughed at that.

“Not the only thing you two did last night.” George looked to Thomas with a scowl, but Laf just laughed.

“You’re one to talk.” Lafayette popped the pills, swallowing them down with a sip of coffee. Thomas rolled his eyes and left the room, deciding to go find Alexander.

Alexander ended up being out back, curled up in a chair with a blanket wrapped around him while he sipped his coffee. He didn’t seem to be doing anything than looking at the view. Thomas almost didn’t want to go up to him. Almost.

He walked up and wrapped his arms around Alexander from behind, who smiled and leaned up to peck his lips. Thomas gave him a small smile. They stayed there like that for a few, just enjoying each other’s company. Thomas eventually pulled a chair up to sit next to Alexander, who ended up leaning on him, head on the Virginian’s shoulder.

Thomas was surprised at how domestic and simple it was. They were usually always going. It was nice to stop and just relax for once. Thomas wrapped his arm around Alexander and pulled him as close as he could, considering they were in separate chairs.

“You alright?” Thomas asked when he noticed Alexander had been silently crying.

“Mhm. Oh, god. Being here reminds me of John so fucking much.” Alexander turns to Thomas and smiles, tears still falling down his face. “There was this one time he convinced Laf and I to go swimming with him in the lake.” Thomas reached up and wiped Alexander’s now flowing tears with his thumb, letting his hand linger on his face.

Alexander leaned into the touch. “We didn’t think about the weather, and we accidentally locked ourselves out of the house. We just sat out front, waiting for George to get home so we could go inside.” By the time Alexander was done talking, he had closed his eyes, letting the tears fall down his face.

Thomas moved his hand away, using it to help him pull Alexander into his lap, who let out an oof at the action. Alexander had opened his eyes and was looking at Thomas with a mix of happiness and something that looked like a longing for something he would never have again.

After giving him a small smile, Thomas pulled Alexander into a gentle kiss. What he had intended to be something quick and sweet, quickly turned into more. Thomas felt Alexander run a hand through his hair. Normally, he would have gotten upset, but it was just Alexander. Nobody else was there to care about his appearance, excluding the little bit of broken family that was there.

Thomas ran a hand into Alexander’s hair, taking a chunk of it into his fist and gently pulled, earning a small moan from the immigrant. Thomas was about to slip his tongue into Alexander’s mouth when the smaller man pulled away, looking to the door with a mortified look on his face.

Not wanting to see what he was looking at, or more precisely who, Thomas bit his lip and hoped for the best. When he turned around, George was standing there wearing a similar expression to Alexander’s.

They stayed like that, Alexander and Thomas nervously staring at George, and the latter flicking his eyes back and forth between the other two. George was the first to say something, and even then it was barely anything.

“I'm too old for this shit.” Was all he said before turning around and walking inside, pausing in the doorway. “Also, Gilbert and Hercules wanted me to tell you two to be ready by noon,” and with that, he left them alone.

Almost as soon as the door was closed, Alexander broke out in a fit of laughter. Thomas smiled at him, giving Alexander a quick peck on his cheek. “Come on get up, we're going to need a hell of a lot of brain bleach.”

»»————- ————-««

I don’t pretend to know, the challenges we’re facing. I know there’s no replacing what we’ve lost, and you need time.

Alexander got into the car, adjusting his scarf. He heard Thomas chuckle, giving him a dirty look. “It’s your fault I’m stuck wearing a scarf in the first place. Luckily it’s winter and nobody’s going to question it.”

“You could have told me to stop, although I recall you doing the opposite.” Thomas chirped, grinning from ear to ear.

Alexander hit his shoulder gently. “Shush!” Thomas hummed in response, following Lafayette’s car to the mall. “Oh, and what happened to James?”

“Oh. He said he’d meet us at the mall for lunch.” Alexander nodded and leaned his head on Thomas’ shoulder.

“Alright.”

They drove in silence the rest of the way.

#jamilton #mullette #slow burn #slow build #fluff #fluff and angst #angst #modern au #hamilton #alexander hamilton #thomas jefferson #hercules mulligan #lafayette #george washington #martha washington

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kawaiimeraki · 4 years

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A surprise baby moon for me

So, for those of you that don’t know a baby moon is a special night or date night couples like to go on before the arrival of their new baby. Kinda like a honey moon, but they call it a baby moon. So ours wasn’t actually planned , which we didn’t think we’d have one but I’d seen people on social media doing it and thought it was kind of cool but I didn’t want to ask isaac since we’ve already been pretty busy for the holidays with 3 different holiday parties. We had a friends Christmas, then his moms side , and tomorrow we will be going to his dads side Christmas. It’s also been pretty hectic because isaac is in the middle of his 301 coding boot camp course. Thankfully, he has had some time for a Christmas break though and today happened to be the day where he had the least obligations. He finished a test yesterday that was very important for his grade , and he has today and tomorrow free and Christmas as well and goes back to school for Thursday and Friday. Earlier this morning, he was asking me what I wanted to do with our day and I wasn’t sure . I felt pretty lethargic and so did he. I made us a grilled ham and havarti grilled cheese sandwich with the leftover spiral ham I made for the potluck yesterday. We debated going to a movie but then we decided against it because we didn’t want to be too “on the go”. Isaac almost decided to go shooting in the backyard but he just didn’t want to. If we had decided to go to the movies , we had planned to see the Star Wars movie, but we didn’t feel like driving south to get to the theatre with the recliner seats (which are the only ones I like to go to now) & then Isaac came up with a different idea altogether . He and I actually were given a 50 dollar Olive Garden gift card from Chris who is our sister in law. He had the idea to find a hotel next to an Olive Garden so we could have a relaxing dinner and then stay the night and just enjoy ourselves. I think it was a great idea and I was feeling good today and so he booked our hotel at la Quinta / Wyndham up north. It’s a 4 star hotel and we got one of the best rooms because they are definitely not busy on a Monday. We checked in, then we went to have our dinner. I hadn’t been to Olive Garden in years and neither did he. We got a yummy chicken shrimp carbonara dish, unlimited salad and breadsticks with Alfredo dipping sauce , and we took an entree to go. The entree we got was a baked Alfredo tortellini with grilled chicken and it came with soup it was some type of beans with noodles and tomato sauce. We even got free breadsticks with it. We also took a slice of cheesecake to go too. It was definitely too much food for us. On the way back, we got some Starbucks because we wanted to stay up a little later than usual. We go to bed pretty early during the week no later than 11 but 9 on a school night. So we got our coffees and came back. We watched an episode of my hero academia and then we decided to watch a Netflix anime movie called blame ! It was pretty interesting. After that, we watched one of the national lampoon Christmas movie which are actually funnier to watch as an adult . The bed is cozy and the sheets are nice. The bathroom is also very nice and clean. This is definitely a wonderful surprise for Christmas after all the obligations I’ve felt we’ve had this year with gifts and get togethers and feels like something just for us. I was suprised he chose to do this today and also very happy and appreciative. They also have a nice free breakfast in the mornings here. Not just continental. As you can tell, there is a lot of food involved here . We also took a Polaroid that was a little dark but still cute. I’m so thankful to have isaac. He knows me so well now. We’re excited for miles to be here. Just two more weeks til his due date. It’s been hard this year a little bit but it’s all gonna be worth it. Plus Isaacs school will end right in time for him to stay home with me and baby Miles and help me out which should be great . Well, that’s all for now.

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dippedanddripped · 5 years

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A skinny, gap-toothed kid gesticulates wildly in the parking lot of Mike’s Drive-In in Oregon City. Short dreads stick up on either side of his head, like antennae to some alien planet. His friends, in the deep background, hang out of a silver Honda, goofing on one another. But it’s nearly impossible to take your eyes off the skinny kid, with his awkward dance moves and urgent facial expressions. He commands your attention. He needs it.

This is the video for Aminé’s persistently catchy “Caroline,” a half-sung, half-rapped summer anthem that went viral in 2016—the video has more than 200 million YouTube views, and the kid front and center is the artist himself. It’s Aminé’s best-known song, and for most music fans both within his home city of Portland and beyond, it represented the MC/singer/director’s colorful first impression.

Aminé—born Adam Amine Daniel, son of Ethiopian and Eritrean immigrants to Portland and a graduate of Benson High—had been around awhile before “Caroline” hit. His debut album, Odyssey to Me, appeared in 2014, though it has long been expunged from the commercial internet. It begins with a low-key prophecy: “I’m headed to my next show / I gotta go / Headed to that Madison Square / 25,000 fans in the air.” Then an accented female voice repeats “Adam, wake up.” It’s Aminé’s mother, coaxing him back to Portland obscurity. But it’s too late. The dream has taken root.

Aminé hasn’t played Madison Square Garden just yet, but he has definitely found a bigger stage. In 2017, the hip-hop magazine XXL included him in its influential Freshman Class, which functions as a sort of critical watchlist of stars in the making. Billboard and the New York Times both weighed in favorably, the latter calling his major-label debut, Good for You, “one of this year’s most intriguing hip-hop albums and also a bold statement of left-field pop.” The album sold 13,000 copies in its first week, debuting at no. 34 on Billboard’s US charts. After a set at Lollapalooza, Daniel posed for photographs with his arm around a new fan, Malia Obama.

Through sheer will and a catchy song, a colorful dream world became Aminé’s reality. From the outside, it’s like he came out of nowhere. That’s intentional. To become the next big thing in the music world of the late 2010s, you have to let the world in on the ground floor. That can sometimes mean recalibrating, or even erasing, your pre-fame history. All the way along, Aminé—who, through manager Justin Lehmann, declined to be interviewed for this piece and did not respond to requests for comment on this story—had boosters and collaborators. Some have come along for the ride. Some were left in the dust. This is the years-long story of Aminé’s overnight success.

Born in 1994, Aminé grew up in Northeast Portland. He’s said his biggest aspiration back then was “to be Kobe Bryant,” a dream dashed when he was cut from the Benson basketball team as a freshman. But he also grew up in a musical environment—he’s told interviewers his parents listened to everything from Ethiopian music to John Mayer—and music eventually became an obsession. In his first recorded performance, he told Vice in August, he rapped about girls and rival high schools over Waka Flocka Flame’s “O Let’s Do It.”

Josh Hickman, a thoughtful and soft-spoken 26-year-old, is three years Aminé’s senior. He also went to Benson and both ran track, but the two barely knew each other then. Three years after high school graduation, as Hickman began his senior year at Portland State University, he connected with Daniel, a PSU freshman, who messaged him about music.

“My first impression of Adam was that he seemed older than he was,” says Hickman, who spent his college years composing and producing rap music under the name Jahosh. “There was a determination, or a focus, that resonated with me. It probably goes back to track and field at Benson. We would work out six days a week. It really instilled me with this work ethic and discipline. So when I met Adam, I was just like, ‘Man this is dope. He’s just like me.’”

I was screaming to the moon, ‘Check out Aminé! He’s doing the thing! Are you guys paying attention?’

Daniel loaned Hickman money to buy a microphone and portable vocal booth, and they began writing and recording on a relentless schedule. “He would come over in the morning and he wouldn’t leave till night,” Hickman says. “But it didn’t even feel like work.” Daniel would give Hickman input on the beats; Hickman says he helped with song concepts and even lyrics. Together they created the first DIY Aminé release, a mixtape called Genuine Thoughts.

With help from PSU music students whom the charismatic Daniel had recruited along the way—including multi-instrumentalist Irvin Mejia, who would go on to produce “Caroline” and other songs on Aminé’s major-label debut—Hickman went on to produce the bulk of Odyssey to Mein his windowless recording studio in East Portland in late 2013. The album’s songs run from vulnerable, confessional slow-burners (“My Emotions”) to explicit sex jams (“Feelin’ Like”). It’s ambitious both sonically and conceptually: The cover art adapts the poster from Richard Ayoade’s 2010 cult film Submarine, about a small-town 15-year-old named Oliver looking to lose his virginity. The album echoes the film’s plot in places, and references its protagonist throughout.

By Odyssey to Me’s 2014 release, Aminé had picked up a few key supporters in Portland, including Fahiym Acuay, an MC and writer (under the name Mac Smiff) for the popular regional hip-hop blog We Out Here. Meeting Aminé for a video interview, Acuay remembers a funny, slightly shy kid who seemed unusually driven. “He knew that he was a little bit different,” Acuay says. “He had a really different sound—kind of playful—but he also had these really deep melodies.” Acuay became an evangelist for the young artist: “I was screaming to the moon, ‘Check out Aminé! He’s doing the thing! Are you guys paying attention?’”

IMAGE: COURTESY MARCUS HYDE AND REPUBLIC RECORDS

While local acts like U-Krew, Five Fingers of Funk, Lifesavas, and Cool Nutz have made some waves, Portland has never spawned a true national hip-hop star. Instead, we have a closed rap ecosystem with its own set of references, stylistic tendencies, and small-town kingpins. Portland rap artists tend to be judged more on their lyricism and verbal ability than on their melodic instincts or pop savvy. And on those fronts, Acuay notes, Aminé is no match for local mainstays like Illmaculate and Rasheed Jamal—battle-tested MCs with dense, intricate rhyme delivery. In fact, if Aminé had emerged a decade earlier, there’s a good chance he’d figure in the Portland hip-hop story as an eccentric side character, selling mixtapes out of his trunk at rap shows. But Aminé was born in a new era, where the home-burned CD has been replaced by lightly curated “mixtape” download websites that connect artists directly to a national audience, with no middleman and no local-cred hurdles to clear.

And Daniel knew how to work that system. He spent $1,000 of his student loan money to secure Odyssey to Me a spot in the featured albums section of Datpiff.com, a popular hip-hop mixtape-sharing blog that has served as a bellwether for artists like Drake and Chance the Rapper. By the end of summer 2014, Odyssey had reached 20,000 downloads. Daniel and Hickman found a promoter to take a punt on them—Ibeth Hernandez, who offered them a show at Peter’s Room in the Roseland, opening for critically acclaimed California hip-hop trio Pac Div. “It was so sweet,” Hernandez remembers of Daniel and Hickman. “They got me a thank-you card afterward, and it had, like, a Starbucks gift card inside.”

But the biggest payoffs came from shows Aminé and Jahosh booked for themselves. A few days after Christmas 2013, they threw a show marking Odyssey’s imminent release, hit social media hard, and drew 250. A party the next year drew 400, among them Blazers star Damian Lillard. His presence alone hinted that Daniel and Hickman had sidestepped most Portland hip-hop rites of passage. Not everybody would be happy about it.

But Daniel was making connections outside of Portland, too. In summer 2014, after landing internships with Complex magazine and Def Jam Records, he connected with a young, unestablished New York City manager named Justin Lehmann. To Hickman, something about the new arrangement set off alarm bells.

“I was with Adam from day one,” he says, “thinking, his success is my success and my success is his success.” Though he won’t dive into specifics—and allows for miscommunications—Hickman says he decided to get his handshake deal with Daniel into writing. Daniel refused. Hickman “got even more weirded out.” The partnership slowly unraveled, taking the pair’s friendship with it, and Hickman would later pull Aminé’s first album and the subsequent En Vogue EP from the internet, asking social media outlets and blogs to do the same. “It was my assumption that he would have most likely taken the music down himself, had I not,” says Hickman.

He was building this full package for himself. He didn’t just focus on Portland.

Aminé’s second full-length album—the excellent, world-music-inspired collection Calling Brio—proved that he was capable of making great music without Hickman. That too has been scrubbed from the web post-“Caroline,” along with videos and articles from 2014 and 2015, as has become standard practice for many indie artists who take on a major-label rebrand. Around the same time, Daniel texted Acuay to ask him to remove all the pieces We Out Here had written about Aminé from the site. Acuay reluctantly agreed. Later, when he saw a national piece on Aminé billed as “the first interview” with the young artist behind “Caroline,” Acuay admits, “I was kind of salty for a second. I had the first interview.”

Two years after Josh Hickman and Adam Daniel parted ways, Aminé struck gold with “Caroline.” The single and video led to a deal with Republic Records, a Universal subsidiary home to artists from Ariana Grande to Black Sabbath. While Daniel moved to Los Angeles in 2016, his official label bio still begins with “Now, Portland isn’t traditionally referred to as a hotbed of hip-hop like Brooklyn or Compton is, but Aminé could very well change that perception.”

For a moment, it appeared that Aminé might force the issue. In November 2016 on Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show, Aminé performed a striking and minimal version of “Caroline” with a string section. At the end of the performance, the yellow stage lights switched to red, white, and blue, and he delivered a message to the incoming president elected just days before. “You can never make America great again / All you ever did was make this country hate again.” It was a bold choice, one the Times and other outlets focused on. But Portland music fans noticed something else: two vocalists backing up Aminé were established players in the Portland scene, earthy R&B artist Blossom and inventive MC the Last Artful, Dodgr.

Acuay was watching that night. “It was so very Aminé. ‘I’m not going to do what everyone expects me to do.’ I was really proud of him. I remember thinking, he’s making us look good. He’s really holding it down for Portland right now.”

Publicly, “Go Aminé” is the party line in the Portland hip-hop scene, as well. But there is grumbling behind closed doors. A handful of artists and music scene staples contacted for this story declined to be interviewed about Aminé, or did not respond to requests. One artist formerly associated with Aminé indicated a reluctance to be seen as a hanger-on. A polite decline came from Nikolaus Popp, the prolific Portland director credited as the cinematographer and editor behind the “Caroline” video. Popp sent a somewhat cryptic statement: “Respect is everything in this world and that really goes for any human being. People will try to minimize you, but you always have to know your worth. Money doesn’t pay for respect, no matter the amount. It’s about how you treat people.”

In his first big national profile in the New York Times, Daniel used the phrase “super depressing” to describe his path through the Portland music scene, which the article’s author further characterized as “dead.” Aminé’s lyrical take on Portland has been bittersweet since his earliest songs. And on Good for You, he raps about coming home to find kids who bullied him calling him a hero. In the song “Turf,” he details the city’s gentrification in a mournful chorus: “I look around and I see nothing in my neighborhood / Not satisfied, don’t think I’ll ever wanna stay for good.” Another lyric speaks to those mixed emotions with even more clarity, and perhaps provides an explanation for the artist’s systematic eradication of the old Aminé: “I used to have dreams / Now I dream.”

I asked Vursatyl, one-third of the Portland crew Lifesavas—they released their debut, Spirit in Stone in 2003—if his group experienced a Portland backlash when they surfaced on the national radar. “The difference is we were really trudging it out in the local scene for a long time,” he says. “There were a lot of us trying hard to make it. Some of it was friendly competition, and some wasn’t. But everybody wanted to be the guy to put the city on the map.”

That city—before the gentrification of its North and Northeast quadrants—was a place where the black community was still somewhat centralized, and Aminé’s family home, off NE MLK and Dekum, sat at its heart. “There’s less of a sense of community now,” Vursatyl says. “And I think that, in the long term, Aminé would have benefited from what was the black community still being fully intact. He’s had an awesome journey and he’s doing great, but I feel like there’s a disconnect in terms of local pride in him. And you want that groundswell. You want to play to your base.”

But for Hernandez—who also booked Aminé’s first South by Southwest performance (“The whole showcase fell apart. It was a disaster, actually.”)—the fact that Aminé’s dreams were bigger than his hometown is exactly what made him stand out. “He didn’t make the rounds like other artists, but that’s OK,” she says. “He was building this full package for himself. He didn’t just focus on Portland. A lot of artists put themselves in a box, and that’s cool, but at some point you have to expand. I saw him expand at such an early point, and he’s still expanding.”

Where Aminé is expanding to is an open question. In interviews, he’s low-key and likable—the right mix of confident, humble, and self-deprecating. Critics praised Good for You as “honest” and “carefree.” Its impressive breadth spans from the floaty Frank Ocean-esque Auto-Tune ballad “Hero” to a curious diss track laid out over progressive, minimal electronic music, “STFU.” If anything, the album seems built—albeit on a solid pop-rap foundation—as a showcase for Aminé’s versatility in both sonic approach and personality. He’s a sensitive, brutally honest outcast on the molasses-slow “Sunday,” and a bitter ex-boyfriend on “Wedding Crashers.” Album closer “Beach Boy” spells out the MC’s thoughts on his own mutability: “Who knows what the future holds / I don’t, if the truth be told / They say play it safe, young soul / Fuck that, I’mma take control.”

Two years ago, taking control meant parting ways with Josh Hickman, now studying software development in Los Angeles and making music as a hobby. When he won an $18,000 scholarship for making a tutorial video about sampling, Hickman used a song he built for Aminé as the video’s source material. “I took it as a message from the universe or God that, hey, I got what I needed out of that situation,” he says. He hasn’t spoken to Daniel in years, he says, but he’s not bitter about the experience. “We had all these doubts,” he remembers. “We’d be in the studio just talking, saying, ‘Man, are we crazy?’ And it’s dope to see those doubts were unfounded.”

In October, Aminé posted a new video to YouTube, this time for his playful song “Spice Girl.” It hit one million views in three days. The video features a cameo from a childhood hero, from the first concert he ever attended: the Spice Girls’ Mel B. Like every artifact of Aminé’s newly rebooted career, the video is colorful, cinematic, and dreamlike.

The video also makes obvious what should have been clear all along: Aminé never had Portland dreams. He saw himself, a first-generation American-born citizen living in an unlikely corner of the country, playing Madison Square Garden. He saw himself in the company of stars.

Something familiar about the particular inflection Daniel gave the titular “Caroline” suggests she’s the same character André 3000 sang about 15 years ago, on Outkast’s smash-hit “Roses.” In Aminé’s later song “Veggies,” from his 2017 so-called “debut” album Good for You, he refers to himself as “André’s prodigy.” These tributes to the eccentric vocal genius and fashion icon who got every wedding party in America dancing to “Hey Ya” are rare signposts from an artist who seemed, to most fans, to “come out of nowhere.”

Just one year after he uploaded the “Caroline” video to YouTube, Daniel posted a street-corner selfie to Instagram. On the left, wide-eyed with his mouth forming a stunned “ooh,” is Aminé. On the right, Outkast’s André 3000.

Adam Daniel used to have dreams—now he dreams. And his most compelling characteristic seems to be that he’s living out his fantasies in the public sphere. But dreams, by their nature, are not collaborative. They are personal. One dream lived is always another deferred. It’s been clear from the moment “Caroline” hit YouTube that the skinny, gap-toothed kid in the front was going to stay there. It’s still anybody’s guess whom he’ll take with him.

#amine #music blog #pdxhiphop

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anatraart · 6 years

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Only Know You Love Him When You Let Him Go Part 8

It’s Quiet Uptown Part One

Read it on AO3 HERE

There are moments that the words don’t reach, there is suffering too terrible to name.

When the alarm went off at 4 am so they got in at a decent time, Alexander rolled off the bed, groaning when he his the floor.

“Why-” Thomas started but seemed to think better of it. “Nevermind. I feel like I don’t wanna know.”

With a small laugh, Alexander got up and went into the bathroom, returning a few minutes later with his hair in a messy bun and one of Thomas’ sweaters on.

“Who said you could wear my sweater?” Thomas teased.

“It’s four in the morning, I’m cold, and It’s warm,” Alexander spoke with a small nip in his voice, as if he wanted to sound like a smartass, but was too tired to do so.

“Alex, you know you can sleep right?”

“The coffee is because I had to wake up at 4 am. With the amount of caffeine I consume do you really think a cup of coffee is going to do anything?”

»»————- ————-««

You hold your child as tight as you can, and push away the unimaginable.

“Nope.” Was all he heard before feeling Hercules pick him up. “Come on, Laf. You can sleep in the car.”

“Why do I even have to go? It’s not like there’s a reason to go. We all have school.” Lafayette complained, crossing his arms and trying to squirm out of his boyfriend’s arms.

“Laf… I know it’s been hard on all of us, but what’s really bothering you? It’s so unlike you to be like this… If it were Alex I’d understand, but it’s you…”

Hercules pressed a kiss to his forehead, holding him closer. “I know, Laf. But It’s too late. There’s nothing we can do but move on..”

Lafayette nuzzled his head into Hercules’ neck while he sobbed, shakes racking through his body. “John didn’t deserve to go like that… Alexander was just holding him… He looked too peaceful… He looked too calm for our John…”

»»————- ————-««

The moments when you’re in so deep, it feels easier to just swim down.

“S-sorry… Being here just reminds me so much of John…” Alexander sat down next to him, and he wrapped his arms around the smaller man.

Thomas grinned when a blush arose in Alexander’s cheeks. “I dunno. Would you like to find out?”

“I suppose,” and like that, Alexander’s lips were on his.

»»————- ————-««

The Hamiltons move uptown, and learn to live with the unimaginable.

He also mentioned he couldn’t get ahold of Alexander or Thomas. Hercules had snickered at that. “I wonder why.” he had said, ignoring the gasp from George.

Sure, it was childish, but it was funny all the same.

“We were thinking about going to get some dinner since George and Martha haven’t gotten here yet.” So George wasn’t lying when he said he couldn’t get ahold of them.

“George and Martha will be coming tomorrow. Some things came up with his work.” Lafayette looked back to Hercules, who was still smiling, most likely remembering their earlier conversation.

“Alright. Well still. I’m starving, and James just texted me he’s staying with his parents tonight.” Lafayette nodded.

“Mkay. Well, we’ll get ready and meet you two downstairs in 5?”

“Okay.” Thomas turned and walked off, taking a smiling Alexander with him.

»»————- ————-««

It’s quiet uptown, I never liked the quiet before.

It turns out, Alexander hates Thomas more than he thought.

When they eventually made their way back to the car, he smiled when Thomas looked like he was about to freak out. “Did you seriously do that to fuck with me the entire time?” he asked.

Alexander tilted his head to the side and gave him the most innocent look he could. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, dear.”

All Alexander could do was nod. It hurt, sure as hell, but at the same time, he liked the pain. He was almost relieved when Thomas removed his finger. It didn’t last long. Right after he felt him lean down to lick the hickey, causing a shiver to run down Alexander’s spine.

»»————- ————-««

Jackie you would like it uptown, it’s quiet uptown.

Sure, he was happy for him. He just didn’t want to hear that kind of thing. Oh god, he was glad George wasn’t there. This whole thing would be so much worse.

Lafayette decided to try his best to focus on the movie, curling into Hercules’ side. “I mean at least Alex has been better lately,” he said, in a failed attempt to lighten the mood.

“Yes, but does he have to be so loud?” Hercules said, looking like he was about to put in earbuds. Alexander chose that moment to be particularly loud.

»»————- ————-««

You knock me out, I fall apart. Can you imagine?

When he walked in, he smiled and went over to hug George and Martha, glad he had grabbed a turtleneck. He hoped they didn’t notice the faint marks on his jawline, biting his lip the entire time.

“So what exactly are we going to do for the next week?” He asked while he poured himself some coffee.

“I was actually thinking of sending you all off to a nearby mall. Try to get Laf’s mind off everything.” Alexander choked on his coffee, Thomas snickered.

“I’m sure Herc already has that one covered, dad.” Alexander broke out into laughter when Martha’s face paled, and George choked on his drink.

“Alexander, dear god you’re as bad as Gil…” Alexander smiled while he watched George pinch the bridge of his nose.

“I mean, we did live together for four and a half years.” George shook his head again.

“You two are insufferable.”

Thomas was the first to reply. “I’d like to second that.” He was also the first to be hit that morning.

“Thomas!” he slapped his shoulder again.

“What was the second one for?”

“Laf. Although he would have slapped you.”

“Makes sense.” Alexander smiled and sipped his coffee.

“Then I guess it’s settled. I call dibs on not being the one to wake them up.”

Alexander decided it was a safe time to leave the room since he really didn’t want to be the one dealing with it. Sure, he had come to their dorm many times and heard it, but nope. He didn’t have to, he didn’t want to.

»»————- ————-««

If I could spare his life, if I could trade his life for mine, he’d be standing here right now. And that would be enough.

In the end, Lafayette was the one to wake them up. Before anyone got a chance to go wake the two up, Lafayette came into the kitchen, immediately going for the bottle of Excedrin on the counter.

“You alright Gil?” George asked. Thomas looked to Lafayette with concern.

“Mhm. Herc thought it would be fun to get wasted last night after dinner.” Thomas laughed at that.

“Not the only thing you two did last night.” George looked to Thomas with a scowl, but Laf just laughed.

“You’re one to talk.” Lafayette popped the pills, swallowing them down with a sip of coffee. Thomas rolled his eyes and left the room, deciding to go find Alexander.

“You alright?” Thomas asked when he noticed Alexander had been silently crying.

“I’m too old for this shit.” Was all he said before turning around and walking inside, pausing in the doorway. “Also, Gilbert and Hercules wanted me to tell you two to be ready by noon,” and with that, he left them alone.

Almost as soon as the door was closed, Alexander broke out in a fit of laughter. Thomas smiled at him, giving Alexander a quick peck on his cheek. “Come on get up, we’re going to need a hell of a lot of brain bleach.”

»»————- ————-««

I don’t pretend to know, the challenges we’re facing. I know there’s no replacing what we’ve lost, and you need time.

“You could have told me to stop, although I recall you doing the opposite.” Thomas chirped, grinning from ear to ear.

Alexander hit his shoulder gently. “Shush!” Thomas hummed in response, following Lafayette’s car to the mall. “Oh, and what happened to James?”

“Oh. He said he’d meet us at the mall for lunch.” Alexander nodded and leaned his head on Thomas’ shoulder.

“Alright.”

They drove in silence the rest of the way.

#jamilton #jamilton fic #jamilton fanfiction

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mill3nniumforc3 · 5 years

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2018: A Year in Review

Hey, everyone! So, it is currently November 29, 2018. I’m starting my AYiR earlier than my normal December 10th for a couple of reasons. Firstly, I’m busy with working two jobs and don’t have the time that I used to have in the past. The proof: I’m publishing this on January 2nd instead of December 31st. Oops! Secondly, a LOT has happened this year, and I want to make sure I have it all written down.

Of course, like I say every year, you are not obligated to read this. It’s for me to look back on someday. If you choose to read, enjoy reading about my year :)

January

The new year rang in. It was just me and my dog. I was watching Hey Arnold! The Jungle Movie in the living room and ended up falling asleep shortly afterwards.

January 2nd was the day that completely changed my life, though I didn’t know it at the time. I had been using Tinder on and off since 2015, mainly for shits and giggles. I was actually extremely picky when it came to swiping right on people. First, I would decide whether or not I thought someone was attractive (it’s important to be attracted to people you might want to date). Second, I would look at all the pictures (pictures that included smoking, drinking beer, hunting, pro-Trump, or nudity would cause me to swipe left). Third, I would read the bio (mentions of only wanting a hookup, supporting Trump, wanting a side-chick/third wheel, being obsessed with anime, or not having ambitions caused me to swipe left). Finally, I would check the distance, since Tinder would sometimes goof up and show people who were hundreds or thousands miles of way (I tried long-distance before and it ended with him cheating on me). If all was good, I swiped right.

So, while I was swiping (and laughing whenever I found someone I knew), I came across a guy that I found cute. He had one other picture of him, and both were selfies with him just smiling. Ok! I went to read his bio. He mentioned working on his Masters in Accounting (good! He has ambitions!), liking video games (that’s every guy ever, so ok!), looking for someone to talk to (not sure if that means a friend or a girlfriend, but ok!), and loving to go to Cedar Point (sold!). The distance was about 30 miles, so not that bad. I swiped right and we matched instantly. Then I thought I would never have a conversation with him and moved on.

Well, half an hour later, I got a notification that someone messaged me. I typically didn’t respond to messages because they either had one word or said something creepy. I went to at least read it, and it said five words: “Hi, nice to meet you.” I replied back, “Hi, nice to meet you too.” I thought that would be the end of it when he didn’t reply back, so I went to bed. When I woke up the morning of January 3rd, he replied. “Thanks for messaging back. Most don’t lol. So, what’s your favorite ride at Cedar Point?” From there, we talked all day about Cedar Point. I gave it three days before conversation would die.

Instead, three days later, he asked if he could meet me in person.

January 3rd was also the first day back to dance after the Christmas break. In the class was me, my sister, my aunt, and Danny, who is an ice skater who was taking ballet to work on his technique. We started a new dance to Million Reasons by Lady Gaga. The dance teacher started shipping me and Danny because we made each other laugh (he was obsessed with grand battements and kept asking if it was time to them, which was funny), but I only saw him as a friend.

On January 8th, I submitted my application for rehire at Cedar Point. I wanted to work a rollercoaster SOOOO badly. While I knew my chances for getting Raptor were slim, I was hoping I had a good chance for Blue Streak, since it doesn’t get as busy. My top three when I applied were Blue Streak, maXair/Dodgem, and Giant Wheel/Tiki Twirl/Troika. I absolutely did not want to work Cads again.

On January 9th, I had my first date with Russell. I was nervous as all heck because I hadn’t been on a date in a long time. I couldn’t sit still because I was so nervous that he’d be a serial killer, or not who he said he was, or wouldn’t like me in real life after talking to me online. He picked me up at my house, and we went to Olive Garden. I was a little quiet during the car ride and tried thinking of questions I hadn’t asked him yet. When he accidentally missed the turn for Olive Garden and we ended up in the parking lot for Planet Fitness, he asked me if I thought they served any good food. My response? “They probably have all the granola bars and protein shakes you can eat.” He laughed, and that calmed me down a lot. Making someone laugh is reassuring for me. We got seated at Olive Garden and just kept spitballing topics to talk about. He noticed I was fidgeting and thought he was making me uncomfortable, but I didn’t want to tell him the real reason I was uncomfortable: I was on my period. We kept talking and talking until we realized Olive Garden was a little too quiet. I checked the time and laughed because Olive Garden was closing in five minutes. Russell paid for our meals and we walked out to the car. He turned on the car radio and Bring Me to Life by Evanescence came on. I commented that it was a good song and wanted to sing along, but I was too shy to sing in front of him. When we got closer to my house, he asked me if I wanted to go on a second date with him. I didn’t even hesitate to say yes, and he smiled. We hugged goodbye, and he kissed me on the cheek.

On January 13th, we had our second date. We went to get frozen yogurt and then watched The Greatest Showman. It was a fun time. As we were walking out, I saw a movie playing called Proud Mary, and I started singing it under my breath. Russell looked at me and then saw the name of the movie on the theatre. He laughed and said, “Yes! I’m glad you were thinking that too.” It was cold outside and my teeth started chattering, so he held me close to him. In that moment, I knew that I sincerely liked him. When he dropped me off at my house, I saw him leaning in to kiss me, and I decided to kiss him too. My heart was pounding and I had butterflies in my stomach. It was a nice, passionate kiss that lasted quite a while.

On January 20th, we had our third date. We went to a place that was like a hyped up Chuck E Cheese. There were arcade games, go karts, bumper cars, mini bowling, laser tag, mini golf, and inflatables. It was a ton of fun. After we got done with playing, we went to IHOP for dinner (there were unlimited pancakes). We talked and ate and talked more. I was hoping he’d ask me to be his girlfriend, but he didn’t.

On January 27th, we had a fourth date. We went to a park near my house, got into the backseat of his car, listened to music, and made out. Honestly, that was a lot of fun for me. While we were making out, he said, “So, my mother has started referring to you as my girlfriend. Do you think we’re on that level?” I nodded and said, “Yeah, I do. Do you?” He nodded too, and that was how we officially became boyfriend and girlfriend. Also, we went to second base that day too, and we went to Rockne’s for dinner. While we were eating, I saw one of my old teachers from middle school, I called out to her, and she walked over. I gestured to Russell and said, “This is my boyfriend, Russell.” It felt so good to say that, and he later told me that it felt good for him to hear me call him my boyfriend.

February

Every Saturday, I went on a date with Russell. It was our day to spend together, and I loved having my Saturdays with him.

We had our Valentine’s Day date on February 10th. We went to the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame, and it was an awe-striking experience getting to see outfits and instruments used by John Lennon, Freddie Mercury, Prince, Bon Jovi, everybody! After we looked at everything and browsed in the gift shop (everything was hella expensive, but I guess that’s to be expected since it’s a tourist location), we went to where our reservation is and decided to walk around for a while since we had time beforehand. We got a look inside The Arcade (which was an old mall that had shops on the first floor and a hotel on the rest of the floors) and went inside JACK Casino, where we won $30 (Russell called me his good luck charm). As we were walking back to meet our reservation, a homeless man stopped us and said, “Now, here’s a lucky man. He’s got a beautiful woman. Would you like to buy her one of these roses?” He showed us some fake roses, and Russell gave him $20 for two of them. We walked away and Russell explained that he had seen that man before, so he knew he wasn’t some kind of scammer. Since we had a little more time before our reservation, we got a drink at The Corner Alley. I got a vodka Sprite and he got a rum and coke. We then met our reservation at The Chocolate Bar, and it was amazing. We both got spiked hot chocolates and pasta dishes, and we got fried lasagna as an appetizer. After we finished our dinner, we went to the candy shop, and I bought a bagful of salt water taffy. We didn’t want the night to end yet since it was only 8pm, so we went to our park to make out for a while.

February 14th was Ash Wednesday. It was thankfully a pleasant day, so I walked to church. I got my ashes, and decided to stop at Starbucks on the way home since I was already out. I gave up the one thing I said I’d never give up for Lent again: chocolate. It was a long, sad Lent, but I did it!

On February 16th, I was awakened with a phone call from Cedar Point. I was asked about my top three, and after stating what they were, I was asked to consider Ocean Motion. I thought it over for a moment, and decided to say yes, since I was actually considering Ocean Motion for my top three anyway (the early-entry part was what stopped me from putting it down). My first day of work was April 24th, and I was excited to make my return to Sandusky.

February 24th was the day Russell met my parents. We first went to see Black Panther, just the two of us. We then met my parents and sisters at Hooley House. He said he was nervous, and I told him it would all be ok. We went inside and found my dad. We got seated at two different tables. One table was my sisters and my sister’s boyfriend. The other table was me, Russell, and my parents. Russell was kinda shy around my parents at first. My dad asked him about sports teams, and from there, he became a lot less shy. They were talking about sports, traffic, and their jobs. After we finished dinner, my mom hugged him goodbye and my dad shook his hand, and me and Russell went to get dessert at Dairy Queen (and also, make out).

February 28th was Danny’s last day at ballet class. I was sad that he was leaving since he was my friend, but at the same time, it was kinda relieving since he still wasn’t picking up choreography too well and he had to be corrected on technique many times.

March

On March 3rd, Russell showed me around his hometown. I got to see where he had previously lived before living in his current house, his high school, his workplace, and the landmarks in the city, including a high-end mall (which had a Spencers, which we totally went in). We ended the day by getting drinks and seeing Wish You Were Here, which is a tribute band for Pink Floyd. They were amazing. When he went to take me back to my house, he showed me his former workplace where he got accused for something he didn’t do and ended up getting fired.

March 10th was the day of my cousin’s baby shower. I was so excited for her to become a mom because she had babysat me and my sisters when we were younger and always thought she would be a good mom. The food at the baby shower wasn’t quite my taste (it was a lot of Greek food, since my cousin married a Greek man), but I ate some to be polite and ate a slice of cake (which was regular store-bought cake). After the baby shower, Russell came up and spent some time with me.

On St. Patrick’s Day, my family has two traditions: getting ice cream at Honey Hut since it’s the day the reopen for the season, and going to my Grandma’s house for a traditional Irish dinner of corned beef, boiled potatoes, boiled cabbage, and Irish soda bread. I remember being unsure if the dinner would even happen this year since Grandma passed away in 2017. My aunt, who lives in Grandma’s house, decided to continue tradition. Did I end up going? No. I told Russell about it to see if he wanted to go, but we agreed it probably wasn’t in his best interest to meet the family while everyone is hammered. The ice cream tradition went off without a hitch, and then me and Russell went to a mall near me. We walked around, went into Spencers, wreaked havoc in Dillard’s and Macy’s, looked at the cute dogs in Petland and Pick of the Litter (which should totally be closed down because the dogs were lethargic!), got ice cream at Mitchell’s, and saw Peter Rabbit. We left the mall and got dinner at Panera.

On March 24th, I got to meet some of his friends at a wedding. I was pretty nervous to meet them, but it ended up going great. The wedding was pretty high-end with the food. I found out that day that I like goat cheese, and that I don’t like butternut squash. After congratulating the bride (Russell’s friend), we left to spend some time together.

The next weekend was my birthday weekend. Because Russell couldn’t be with me on my actual birthday (my birthday was on Easter, so I was going to be with family, and he had planned to go to a Cavs game with a friend), he spent that Friday and Saturday with me. We got dinner at Carrabba’s on Friday, and went to the IX Indoor Amusement Park on Saturday. He also got me at Wii-U for my birthday.

April

April 1 was Easter and my 24th birthday. I went to church with my mom’s side of the family (there was a Mass offered for Grandma), and then we went to brunch at my dad’s side of the family. I also got a text from my long-lost BFF Ashlyn, and we talked about how our lives were going.

On April 7th, I got to meet Russell’s mother, Tee. I was nervous to meet her and afraid that she wouldn’t like me. We went to Olive Garden and the very first thing we bonded over was cheese. I looooove cheese, and when the server started grating the cheese, we both stared at the cheese, which made us laugh.

On April 14th, me and Russell went on our first vacation together, which was a birthday present for both of us, since Russell’s birthday is in May. We went to Kings Island, which was about 3.5 hours south of us, but still in the same state. We left at 5:30am, and got there around 9. We got a pretty decent parking spot and the line to get inside wasn’t bad at all for April 14th being Opening Day. At 9:30am, we were let in and we got our fast passes. We rode all the rollercoasters twice, except for Beast, which we rode three times, and Adventure Express, Racer, and The Bat, which we rode once. We also went into the Eiffel Tower to get some pictures of the views, and when I went to get my glasses, I found that they broke on one of the rides. Oops lol. Russell guided me around since I couldn’t see too well. Once we were all rollied out, we checked into our hotel and got dinner at McDonald’s. We headed back to our hotel and laid down in bed for a nap. It led to us making out instead, and I let him see me topless for the first time. We continued making out and, at some point when I was on top of him, he adjusted himself, accidentally dry-humping me in the process. I pushed back on him, and that is how we got into one of our favorite things to do together. It was hard to sleep that night because, even though we had the A/C on, it was hot in the room. Also, my shoulder was hurting, and the pain was keeping me awake. Russell tried massaging it to ease the pain, which helped a little, but it still hurt a lot. I don’t know when we fell asleep, but I do know that when Russell’s phone alarm went off, neither of us wanted to leave the bed. We went to see what was for breakfast in the hotel, and it was pretty lame. Just pastries and coffee. I had went into the bathroom because I was getting nauseous from a combination of how badly my shoulder hurt and I hadn’t peed in over 24 hours (I get bladder shy). I managed to relieve my bladder, which helped me feel kinda better. When I got back to Russell, he asked me if I puked, and I shook my head no. I drank the rest of my coffee and then we went back to the room to lay down for a bit before we had to check out. We started watching Pinocchio (it was on Freeform) and making horrible jokes about it. Eventually, it was time for us to go. We checked out, got lunch at McDonald’s (it was across the street from the hotel), and went back home.

I went to the eye doctor shortly after the incident to get a new prescription for my glasses. I ended up picking a pair of red Ralph Lauren glasses, and I added a blue light filter to protect my eyes when I use my laptop and phone. They told me the glasses would be ready in 7-10 days, and I was a little panicked because I was moving back to Sandusky in less than a week for work. My mom said she could drop them off, and Russell offered to bring them if they were ready before he was up there for the Steel Vengeance first rider event.

On April 21st, me and Russell had a fun day together at a hyped up Chuck E. Cheese (not the same place as we went before). We played skee ball and other games, played mini-golf, and rode go-karts. We then went to Panera and spent some time together, since we knew it would be a little while before we could spend days like this together.

On April 24th, I was back in Sandusky. It was exciting to be back. I didn’t see anyone I knew at process-in, which was kinda a letdown. After getting processed in, I went to get my room assignment and key. I saw my friend Pam from last year in the housing office, and she right away knew where to put me: same building as last year (Valravn House) and first floor. I got the last bed in 123, which was kinda nerve-wracking, since the last time I was the last bed, I had two partier roommates and one roommate who thought she was better than everyone else because she was drinking underage and had a black boyfriend. I moved in all my stuff and organized everything. After I had everything where I wanted it to be, I went to get lunch at McDonald’s. I then relaxed for a while, waiting to meet my roommates. At some point, I left to go to the bathroom, and upon returning, one of my roommates was entering the room too. That was how I met Tracy, a 47 year old who worked at the resort. We got to know each other and learn a bit about our lives. Soon, we were joined by Michaela, a 19 year old who was a first-year ride op. She got excited to learn I was a ride op too and she asked me tons of questions about which rides I had worked, who I knew, and my favorite rides. The last roommate I didn’t meet until the next day, and I don’t remember her name because she processed out and left a few weeks later.

April 25th was iROC day. I had to take my drug test, and I made sure to get some coffee on the way. I got there a half hour early, and it took me 75 minutes to go (bladder of steel never fails lol). I met Tarshikka, another ride op, there and we were racing to see who could finally go first (she won lol). Thankfully, because I was a returner, they let me go into iROC class late. I went into class, completed everything, passed the iROC exam with a perfect score (2 for 2!), and caught up on what I missed. After iROC, they sent me on a 45 minute lunch break. The issue? I didn’t have a car, nothing on Point was open, and the buses were running every half hour. I found a candy cane in my purse, and that ended up being my lunch. After “lunch,” I was sent to clean/train at Kiddy Kingdom, or as we all affectionately call it, Kill-me Kingdom. Boooo! I put on a happy face anyway and trained at the rides. I met Cieara, Sam, Mario, Isaiah, Eileen (Kiddy’s sup), Lacey (Cads’ sup), Chris (Planet’s sup), Olivia, and Savannah. Chris had us just clean and he’d train us in tomorrow. Ok, good deal. We were supposed to be sent home at 6pm, but they kept us til 7pm. Lame! After leaving, I got dinner at Dairy Queen. I was starving!

On the 26th, I got to train at Kiddy. Chris was the trainer, and I was in a group with Tarshikka, Kayge (a ride op who had previously worked at Kennywood and was a first-year at CP), and Isaiah. Chris had us all run one cycle at Mustangs (the “Hampton sample” since all the Hamptons run the same), Roto Whip (which was a lot like a Hampton, except without the umbrella and with magnetic gates and a lapbar secured with a strap), Sky Fighters (which went up into the air), Helicopters (which used a foot pedal instead of a presence button, and also went up into the air), and 4x4s (which had manual jogs, which is not fun!). After I signed off on all my training papers, I went off to clean.

On the 27th, I started off with cleaning until Eric (my sup from last year) asked for some volunteers in Kiddy to help him commission Dodgems. Chris sent me (yay!), Isaiah, Lacey, Savannah, and Olivia. We drove the cars around in circles, which wasn’t as fun as it sounds. I got called to train at the Kiddy Kingdom Carousel, which was finally given state approval to run. Eileen knew it would be an easy task to train me there since I worked Cedar Downs the year before. I ran the cycle exactly like I would have ran Cedar Downs, and Eileen passed me. I signed off on the paper and was asked to send Savannah to train. I took Savannah’s spot in Dodgems and continued helping to commission. After the commissioning was done, it was back to cleaning.

That night, Russell and Tee were up at CP for the first rider event. He let me know that he had my new glasses and asked where to meet me. I suggested Dairy Queen, but then when I realized it closed at 9pm, I suggested McDonald’s. We met there, I got my new glasses, and we spent a bit of time together.

The 28th consisted of more cleaning and running rides, since the 29th was Family and Friends Day, meaning we’d have riders! I was nervous to have people, but I knew I was ready. The next day, I showed up with coffee and my water bottle in tow (lawlz) and chose to start off at Mustangs. Since we were only open for three hours, I knew that I THANKFULLY would not have to run 4x4s (the rotation went Mustangs, Police Cars, Rock Spin and Turn, Carousel, Roto Whip, Dune Buggies, Sky Fighters, Helicopters, 4x4s, Motorcycles, and Space Age). The day was pretty easy.

The next day was our day off. Only productive thing I did was go to Walmart to buy a backpack and a watch, since I wasn’t allowed to wear my Fitbit at work. Who knew that a Fitbit counted as a “smart watch?” At least that’s what corporate said...

May

On Tuesday, May 1st, I reported to the boat, since we were supposed to be training at our contracted rides. I met Kel (the sup) and Mario and Olivia were contracted to the boat too. Kel then got a call that me and Olivia had to go to Planet Snoopy to train (boooo!) and Mario had to go to Sky Ride. It was a sad day that led to another week of not being at the boat. I got to Planet, and saw that Cieara, Sam, Savannah, Isaiah, Chris (well, obviously), Lacey, and Eileen were all training at Planet as well. Audrey (who was my TL last year, and now the TL at Kiddy), Amanda (the sup of maXair), Kim (the TL of Windseeker), and Kendra (the TL of Planet) were there too. Everyone who was in a leadership position got trained that day, leaving everyone else to clean. After leadership was trained, they started to commission the rides. Chris sent me, Olivia, and Isaiah to help commission Joe Cool’s Dodgem School since we were the smallest weight-wise and could fit in the cars (I ended up being the only one to fit comfortably since Olivia and Isaiah were 6 feet tall and I’m 5′5″). Kim controlled the ride and set the speed to its highest setting. When Chris came to check on us and saw how fast we were going, he put the speed back to where it should be and told Kim not to mess with it. As we were finishing up, Lacey, Eileen, and Audrey all came over and asked to switch out. Lacey took my spot and I went back to cleaning.

The next day, I trained at Planet. Every single ride was operated exactly the same with a foot pedal and magnetic gates. Chris trained me and Olivia and had us run a cycle of each ride since all the rides moved differently. The only ride I didn’t get to train at was Snoopy’s Express since the train was out of commission. After we got done training, Chris asked me to continue commissioning Flying Ace Balloon Race since the person commissioning yesterday only got 15 cycles done. I worked on Balloon Race for awhile until Cieara asked me if I would switch with her and commission Road Rally. I agreed and we switched spots. I saw rain clouds begin to form as I was finishing up Road Rally, so I sped up since it can’t run in rain. I thankfully finished commissioning just in time. As I went to turn in the paperwork, it started to rain. I went back to cleaning after I was done.

Thursday was the day I ended up getting frustrated. The area supervisor kept trying to keep us later and later. Our end time was 6pm, and they originally said they were keeping us til 7pm, which wasn’t bad. They then said we were getting a 45 minute dinner break and staying til 9pm. Then they extended it til 10pm, 11pm, and finally midnight. I was livid! They were only keeping us so late because Raptor and Windseeker were still commissioning, so they were punishing the whole area instead of just those two rides. It was terrible! Everyone in Area 2 had gone home, and the only people in Area 3 still at work were the Steel Vengeance crew. Since Planet was spotless, Chris sent us all to help clean Windseeker while they were commissioning. We all worked hard, and at 11:15pm, Kim decided to call Herbert and ask him if we could go home since the ride was clean and they’d come in early tomorrow to commission. Herbert arrived, looked around, and approved us all to go home, holding Kim to her word that she and everyone else training at Windseeker would be in at 8am.

May 5th-6th was Opening Weekend. I spent the first half of the day at Kiddy, and the second half at Planet. How we operated it since we didn’t have enough staffing to work both was Kiddy was open from 10am-3pm, and Planet was open from 5pm-10pm. 3pm-4pm was our linner break, and at 4pm, we did opening procedures for Planet.

May 7th was our day off, and on May 8th, I FINALLY got to train at the boat. I had to train at Midway Carousel too, but that was easy since I was already trained at Kiddy Kingdom Carousel and it was exactly the same. Same amount of ride units, same cycle length, even the same music! After we trained, we cleaned the rides, and then we all took turns running the rides and riding them.

The euphoria of being at my contracted ride was short-lived, as I had to spend the weekend split between Planet and Kiddy. This time, since staffing was up, I spent the first half of the day at Planet and the second half at Kiddy, taking my 45 at Planet, and my 30 and 15 at Kiddy.

After that weekend, the park was open daily. I was always at either Planet or Kiddy. If I was ever at the boat, I’d always be sent to Planet or Kiddy shortly afterwards. It felt like I was contracted there instead of OMO. One day, I showed up at the boat, and it was just me and Kel. Mario had become notorious for being late and we were surprised Olivia hadn’t shown up. I was thinking maybe Mario and Olivia were carpooling, but when Mario showed up and not Olivia, Kel called for a higher-up. Turns out, Olivia had quit, so it was just the three of us now.

May 16th was Russell’s birthday. I was off that day, and since I couldn’t spend it with him since he was 90 minutes away and at work, I took the opportunity to get my first ride on Steel Vengeance. It was about a 90 minute wait since they were only running one train due to mechanical issues (the running joke was Steel Vengeance had a Mean Streak), so it wasn’t bad at all. I was assigned towards the back and seated with a stranger. He seemed a bit nervous to be seated next to a girl, but I assured him that I wasn’t scared and loved rollercoasters. My heart was pounding as we went up the lift hill and because I was in the back, as soon as the rest of the train cleared the lift, we were quickly thrown down the hill. I was hooting and hollering the whole ride. It was fun! By the time the ride ended, I was breathless. We got off, and the man sitting next to me shook my hand and said he had fun riding with me. I happily grabbed my stuff out of the locker and decided to splurge on a Steel Vengeance t-shirt to commemorate my first ride.

Memorial Day weekend, Russell and Tee spent the weekend at the resort as a combination of his birthday and Mother’s Day celebration. Saturday, Russell invited me to spend the night with them. I got off at 8pm, and we went to Bay Harbor for dinner. It was a huge ripoff. I could have gotten the same dish at Olive Garden for half the price. We then went for a swim in the pool. I was off that Sunday (May 27th), so we went to the park together. We went on Windseeker, which Russell was terrified of. When the ride was stopping, he said to me, “You know, this ride really isn’t as bad.” In that moment, like word vomit, I said to him, “There’s something I’ve wanted to say to you all day.” He looked at me nervously, and I said, “I love you.” Things were quiet for a moment and I said, “If you’re not ready to say it back, it’s ok. I just wanted to put it out there that that’s how I feel.” Later that night, we were in the pool again, and he said, “So, do you remember what you said on Windseeker?” I asked him what about it, and he replied, “I love you too.” I was a little skeptical and asked if he really did or if he was saying it because I said it. “No, I’ve loved you for a while now. I was just waiting for you to say it first.”

May 28th was Memorial Day. I was a little bummed out because I wanted to see Journey and Def Leppard, but I was at work. I opened the carousel that day, and as I was hanging out waiting for riders, a storm began brewing in. I was a bit nervous because the roof of the carousel was made of tin. As I was nervously standing by the horses to avoid the storm, I heard someone call out to me. I looked over and saw a blonde girl walk up to me. “Hey, I’m Katie! I’m the TL!” she said. I smiled at her and introduced myself back. She asked if I had met Kel, and I told her I have and he was over at the boat. She then headed over there, and I was left by myself again. Eventually, Kel called over and told me to take the carousel down because of the storm, and I ran over to the boat because I didn’t want to be by myself.

June

June 2nd was my mom’s birthday, and I got to go home that night since I was off on the 3rd and my cousin’s daughter was being baptized. It was good being home for a bit. I went back that evening.

Around this time, I started getting closer to Mario. I was annoyed by him because he was always late and seemed so careless, which irritated me because he was the in-charge (I couldn’t be the in-charge since I was always being sent to Planet). One day, we were down for rain. Herbert wanted us to go back up, but Katie refused because it was raining and she didn’t want to boat to catch fire. Mario returned from break while I was sitting in controls eating a snack and Katie was arguing with Herbert. When I saw Herbert walking to the booth, I stuffed the rest of my snack into my mouth, and Mario made a sound effect to go along with it. I started laughing and asked why he did that, and he said that’s what it looked like. In that moment, I realized Mario wasn’t so bad after all. Herbert made me run a cycle of the boat and, when it didn’t show any signs of slippage, he made us go back up, despite it still pouring down rain. I was then sent to the carousel and Mario was sent home. He came to talk to me for a minute and invited me to go on Professor Delbert’s Frontier Fling with him. I accepted the offer, and we planned for the 12th since he was an O-4 and I was the cutback.

Also, around this time, I met Bailey, Estefany, Deannia, and Mustafa. We all became like family to each other.

On the 12th, I went on Frontier Fling with Mario. I was off the next day, so Russell made the trip up to see me and spend time with me. He watched the two of us on Frontier Fling (he was too scared to join us) and laughed at how loudly I screamed. We then went to see what the wait time was for Steel Vengeance, since it was still on single-train operation. It was a 75 minute wait. Russell didn’t want to wait that long, but Mario did, so we let Mario go ride and me and Russell decided to go to the hotel.

*THIS PART IS A LITTLE TMI* Russell brought his Switch along and we played Strip Mario Kart. When I lost, I was nervous about taking off my underwear, so we went into the bathroom and I pulled them off. I was terrified being naked in front of him. He took off his underwear too, making us both naked in the bathroom. We kissed, and then I giggled at the realization that we were standing in the bathroom, naked, and kissing. We then got into the shower together. Once we were done, we got into the bed and made out. We then did some inappropriate things (not sex though).

The next morning, we got breakfast in the hotel, and then we went inside the waterpark that was in the hotel. It wasn’t really that impressive. The water coaster was fun and the jacuzzi was great, but the water slide wasn’t fun (water got in my nose, and I couldn’t breathe. When I got into the water, I thought I was going to die for a few seconds until I remembered the pool where I landed was three feet deep and I could stand up. I stood up, took in a big breath, and saw Russell racing towards me because I was under for a bit longer than I thought. The lifeguard asked if I was good, and I nodded). We left the waterpark after a while, and then decided to go to CP for some fun.

On the 14th, I sadly had to go back to work. I put on my uniform and we got breakfast at McDonald’s. While eating, I saw my cousin and her kids. I waved them over and introduced them to Russell. My cousin asked what time I got on, and when I told her 11am, she said she’d stop by to see me (which ended up not happening. I’m thinking she probably stopped by while I was on break). Russell then dropped me off in the employee parking lot, and I waved as he drove back home.

Around this time, I started having trouble with my wisdom teeth. As you may remember from 2017, the right side of my mouth was giving me issues. This time, it was my left side. It was almost excruciating. I cried at work a few times because the pain was so bad and Advil and Tylenol were not helping at all.

The rest of the month was pretty dull. Though, at some point towards the end of the month, I watched The Incredibles 2. It was, well, incredible. MUCH worth 14 year wait.

July

July started off ok. I was still having problems with my wisdom teeth, but I was pushing through it the best I can.

On the Fourth of July, I worked the opening shift (because I requested to have the fifth off). After getting off work, I went to chill in my room for a while since the park was crowded and I didn’t feel like standing in the heat. When the sun started setting, I went back to the park and rode some rollies. I was going to hang out with Mario because he was supposed to be off at 9pm, but apparently the closing shift was taking their sweet time with breaks, so I ended up being on my own. I watched the fireworks show and then Mario found me. We rode some rollies together and then decided to hang out at the boat. When the park closed, I went to the “food festival” the park was having for employees, but nothing looked appetizing to me, so I left, thankful I was off the next day.

On July 9th, I was off... and so was Mario. When we found out we had the same day off, he asked what we were doing. Without skipping a beat, I told him we were riding Steel Vengeance. That morning, I had to run to Walmart and asked if he wanted to come with me (I needed to buy tampons, Orajel, and mac n cheese. I of course ended up buying some shit I didn’t need too). Mario came with me, and we kinda went our separate ways while shopping because he didn’t want to go into the tampon aisle. We met up after we were done, stopped at employee housing to drop off our stuff, and then we went on our way to the park. We had a ton of fun riding all the rides. Towards the end of the night, we rode Maverick, and the operators allowed rerides since there was nobody in line. We rode three times without needing to get back in line, though we did have to change seats once because someone was in line for our row. By the time we left, it was 11:05pm (five minutes after park close). Mario wanted to ride Steel Vengeance again, and we were a good five minute walk from there. I told him he had three minutes before they closed the line and I didn’t want to run, so he took off. I asked him the next day if he made it, and he said he did.

In late July, I took three days off because I needed a break and was hoping to see my dentist. I went home and, while I wasn’t able to see the dentist, I was able to see Russell on July 25th, since I hadn’t seen him since June. We got dinner together and hung out.

August

On August 5th, I was off, so Russell and Tee came up to visit the park and spend time with me. We rode a bunch of rides and had tons of fun. They left around 9pm since they had to work the next day, and I went to get some rest since I knew work was going to be brutal.

August was a pretty rough month. I was sick to death of the same old cycle of rotating between the boat and carousel. My schedule started becoming more hectic as Stef left on the 15th, Deannia left on the 24th, Bailey left on the 26th, and Katie left daily operations on the 25th (she’d return for Halloweekends though). Mustafa had been moved to Blue Streak, so it was only me, Mario, Kel, and whoever else was cross-trained that could come work. Because I was still sent to Planet and Kiddy quite a bit, they often would have to scrounge up two people. On top of that, Katie and Kel had no choice but to make me an in-charge since both of them were gone on Labor Day weekend and they couldn’t have Mario be the only in-charge.

Also, because Mario was late so often, the manager said that if he was one minute late ever again, he was getting fired. One morning, I knew he had to be in at 9am because he was at another ride. I was running the carousel, and as it was going, I saw Mario arrive. I looked at my watch. 9:25am. I gave him a sad look and shook my head, and he said, “I’m so sorry.” I broke down in tears. He was my best friend and honestly my only motivator for coming to work. After the cycle ended, I had nobody in line, so I called over to OMO. Katie answered and upon hearing my sobs, said to me, “Listen, I know you’re upset and I wish I could give you a hug right now, but you need to pull yourself together. Mario knew this could happen, and I don’t need you being sad right now. Be sad on your break. I love you, but please calm down.” Thankfully, Mario ended up not getting fired because he had a legitimate excuse for being late and the manager gave him another chance.

On August 27th, I had an appointment with the employee clinic. A couple weeks prior, I was experiencing migraines and nothing was making them go away. Not Advil, not Tylenol, not coffee, not ASMR videos, not even praying. I talked to the doctor about how I was feeling. I described all my symptoms (pain located on the right side of my head, nausea, sensitivity to light, sensitivity to loud noises, and the pain was so bad that it made me cry during work. I hadn’t called off though because I didn’t want to let anyone down. The doctor asked when my next day off was, and I said Friday. She said she didn’t want me to wait that long, so she gave me a medical excuse to get the day off so I could get Excedrin. I walked to park op and talked to Ashley (one of the operations supervisors). She saw how bad I felt about taking the day off, but she said, “I appreciate that you’ve been pushing through the migraines, but I think you need to listen to the doctor on this one. I promise you aren’t letting the crew down. We’ll find someone to take your spot. Get the medicine and feel better. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I tried to sneak out so nobody on the crew saw me leave, but Jana saw me and ratted me out. Thankfully, after taking the Excedrin, I felt much better. I was afraid Kel would be mad the next morning, but he wasn’t mad at all. He asked if I was feeling better, and I just said, “Excedrin is magic. The migraines that have bothered me for the past two weeks are gone.”

August 30th was the roughest day yet. I started that day as the cutback, meaning I opened and left when breaks were done. I was supposed to be the first break. Come 11am, I saw that Kel, Mario, and Jana (an international who worked at Cads) were all at the boat, and wondered why I wasn’t sent on break. Before I had the chance to call and see what’s up, Kel called me and said, “You’re going to Planet. When Mustafa gets here, you’re going over there.” I was not happy to hear that! I wanted to go on break. When Mustafa came to the carousel with my bag, I wished him luck and sulked to Planet. After dropping off my stuff, Chris asked me what my shift was. I told him cutback, and he said he’d send me on break next and to send Emylee to Raptor. I ran one cycle at Snoopy’s Express when I was sent on break. That was fast! I told Chris I was taking an hour break and left. After break, I was sent to Road Rally. Noooo! I was at Road Rally for four hours til Chris came over and sent me to Deep Sea Divers because the person there needed to go to First Aid. I was getting impatient because it was 5pm and there were tons of breaks left. I was at Divers for about five minutes when Chris came to me again. He asked me the one question I thought he’d never ask... “Can you go to Cads?” Cads?? I went, not bringing my bag because I didn’t think I’d be there long. When I got there, Holly (the TL) filled me in on the details: she sent someone to HR hours ago and she never returned, and they had to give the cutback to an international because he had to process out or else he becomes “undocumented.” Since I was an in-charge at Cads in 2017, Herbert figured he could just throw me into position. She asked if I needed her to retrain me, and I said, “No. I got this.” I jumped cars *just like old times* and saw Josh (a regular from last year) who got excited to see me. Once breaks were done at Cads, Holly verified that I was ok with staying another two hours, and I said it was fine, but would it be ok if I ran to Planet really quick to get my bag. Holly said yes and told me to take my time since I *technically* needed a 15 since my shift was now an O-C. I got my bag and returned to Cads as promised. Holly then asked me if I wanted to close Cedar Downs since she previously heard me call it “my baby.” I said yes, and Kyle (the sup. Oh yeah, Lacey demoted herself to TL and took a position at another ride) handed me the keys when I got there. He teased me about working yet another carousel, and I just laughed. I got my spiel mixed up a few times because I was so used to Midway Carousel, but I managed to get it together. I thankfully only had one guest issue because he thought his little kid could ride, but he thankfully didn’t yell at me (so many people yelled at me last year!). At the end of the night, I was exhausted. Who knew being pinballed all over Area 1 could be so exhausting?

On August 31st, guess who made their return? That’s right: Russell and Tee! I was happy to see them. I was off that day, so I met up with them and we first dropped off our stuff at the hotel. Afterward, we went to Walmart and Cracker Barrel. I felt sad though because Russell was having coughing fits and I wanted him to feel better. That night, Russell decided to nap while me and Tee went into the park. We got our last ride on Witches’ Wheel (RIP 1977-2018) and also rode Magnum, Pipe Scream, and Maverick (mainly out of spite since it’s Russell’s favorite coaster).

September

On September 1st, I didn’t have to be in til 11am (#bless) but that also made me the closing in-charge. I left the hotel room around 10:30am because I had to stop at Wardrobe and Starbucks. When I was at Wardrobe, I went to get my ID, and found Tee’s season pass with it. I gasped in horror because I completely forgot she gave it to me. After getting a clean uniform, I bolted back to the hotel and to the room. I knocked, when Tee answered, I gave her the season pass back. “I’m so sorry. I completely forgot I had it. I have to run now.” Tee laughed and said, “Yes, you do. Run!” I made it to work right on time and took charge sending breaks. The day went relatively smoothly. No big issues at all. At the end of the night, it was me, Louie (who worked Gemini), and Xavier (who worked at Windseeker). I took controls during the last half hour so I could organize paperwork to make closing easier. After both rides were closed, I sent them home and told them I’d see them bright and early. I finished up the paperwork and went to file it. Once everything was done, I texted Russell that I was on my way back. I got there, took a quick shower, and got into bed next to him, not looking forward to tomorrow morning.

On September 2nd, I was the opening in-charge, meaning I had to be at work at least 15 minutes early. I set my alarm for 7am since I was on-site at the resort, and when Russell woke up with me, I quietly whined that I didn’t want to go. He helped me up and I got dressed into my uniform. He then walked with me to the entrance. He kissed my forehead goodbye (he was afraid he’d be contagious) and said he’d see me later (he and Tee were leaving that afternoon) and I went off to get breakfast before heading to park op. I then picked up the folder and keys, and went off to the ride. I sat alone and ate my breakfast while waiting for Louie and Xavier. When they showed up, I told them to decobweb the carousel. I worked on organizing the morning paperwork. I glanced over at the carousel about 20-past and they were goofing around. I called over and asked if they finished decobwebbing, when they didn’t give a coherent answer, I sighed and told them they had 10 minutes to decobweb before we had to do opening procedures. After 10 minutes, I saw they were still goofing around. I sighed again and called them again, telling them to come over for preopening. Because Xavier was the cutback, I had him open the carousel, and I had Louie open the boat with me. It felt weird being on the other side of opening the boat, since I’m so used to pressing the button and giving the “all clear” signal. Once preopening was done, I had Louie test-ride the carousel, and had Xavier test-ride the boat. At 11:20am, Mario arrived. Naturally, I was ticked, but I kept my cool and asked if he called park op. He said he did and explained that the bus schedule was off. I nodded, and wrote his explanation in the notes section. First breaks went off without a hitch. Xavier, me, and Louie all took hour breaks, and Mario took a 45. I went to send Xavier on his 15, and when he didn’t come back after 15 minutes, I thought maybe he was taking a 30 because he forgot he took an hour. Hey, shit happens. I saw Xavier pass the carousel and thought he was going to clock back in from break. When I wasn’t sent on a 15 after a few minutes, I looked over and saw Xavier was nowhere to be found. I called the boat and asked where Xavier was. Turns out, Xavier interpreted “go on your 15″ as “go home.” What? After an hour and no break help, Mario sent Louie over to rotate me out. After another hour (at this point, 45 minutes before we close), Jana came over for break help. Jana looked upset at first and asked me if she was here for the rest of the night. I told her no, and that she was only here for half an hour so Mario could go on break (both me and Louie forgoed our 15′s, since they’re optional. However, 30′s are mandatory). Jana looked relieved, and, to our delight, the ride went down for weather. We hid in the control booth and, when Mario returned, we sent Jana back to Cads.

September 3rd was the last day of daily operation, and Kel had returned (hooray!). It was kinda bittersweet to not be at the park daily, but it was a huge relief too.

September 4th was the scariest day ever. Me and Russell have a thing where we don’t got a day without talking. I texted him as usual, and when I didn’t get a response, I was a little concerned. By 10pm, I still had gotten nothing from him. I looked at the messages from the night before, and they were all good messages. Around 10:45pm, I sent him a message (admittedly out of spite) that said, “Ok, I’m going to guess you were super busy today lol. I’m going to bed now because I’m exhausted. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Goodnight, babe. I love you.” I was hoping that would trigger some kind of response, but it didn’t. I began running worst case scenarios in my head. My biggest fear was he was either dead or cheating on me. I was more worried than I was angry. I laid in bed and cried, because I didn’t know what was wrong.

Needless to say, I did not sleep well that night. I kept waking up and checking my phone, just hoping for some kind of text from him. Around 9am, I got a text. I didn’t even want to look at my phone at that point, because I was afraid I’d be getting my hopes up and that the text would be from Ashlyn or my aunt or something. I reluctantly looked, just in case. Sure enough, it was Russell. “Hey, baby. I am sooo sorry about yesterday. I got admitted into the hospital yesterday, but don’t panic. I was only admitted as a precaution because my oxygen levels were low. Turns out I have pneumonia after all lol. I would’ve told you yesterday, but my phone died and I didn’t have a charger on me. I hope you’re doing well. I love you, baby.” Tears filled my eyes, and I muttered that he was an ass. I replied to him, and we talked. (PS: Yes, he knows all about how I felt. We had this conversation later on and he almost got upset when he found out that he had me worried, but I told him that it was kinda a good thing too because it shows how deeply I care about him).

September 5th was also the first day of dance classes. I had ballet on Wednesdays and tap on Thursdays. I chose not to do jazz since the advanced class does hip-hop (which is not my forte) and the adult class is too basic for my repertoire.

September 8th, it was back to the old grind. I came into work at 8am and we cleaned the rides super good. I was happy to see Katie again though.

September 9th, Russell was released from the hospital (yay!) and it was Mustafa’s last day (boo!). He stayed in Sandusky til the 16th though and stopped by the boat to say goodbye to all of us.

Starting September 14th was Halloweekends. I was at Planet on Fridays, and at OMO Saturdays and Sundays (though there was one weekend I was at Planet all weekend, and the last two weekends, I was at OMO all weekend and Katie went to Planet because she was the TL there last year).

September 23rd was Jana’s last day. I was at Planet all weekend, meaning Jana was at OMO. I passed her on my way out, and Jana hugged me and kissed both cheeks. I was sad she was leaving because she was fun.

On September 27th, I had my consultation for my wisdom teeth surgery. The surgeon said he would’ve liked it if I were a couple years younger since my wisdom teeth were pushing on my molars, but it was ok and I’d “probably live.” (he said that as a joke because he could tell I was nervous). The surgery was scheduled for November 8th. Hooray.

That’s about it for September.

October

October wasn’t all too exciting either. I got into the rhythm of dance and work. I was meanwhile trying to find another job since I can’t go back to CP for summer 2019 (way too busy, with the dance recital in 2019 and a coaster trip in the works with Russell).

On October 19th, Russell and Tee came up for the weekend. It was great to spend time with them, albeit not much since I was working all day. That Friday, they visited me while I was working the carousel. The Saturday, they visited me both at the carousel and at the boat (I was working platform and they asked me if I wanted anything from McDonald’s. No, thank you. I don’t get off for another 75 minutes, plus if I eat before sleeping, I won’t sleep lol). The Sunday, they came to see me at the boat, and I happened to be in the control booth at the time. I didn’t notice them by the booth til the ride was stopping (Russell kept making faces at me to get my attention lol). When they were loading, Katie got back from her break (finally lol, We had to hold breaks for two hours because they sent Blake (the sup of Sky Ride) to Raptor and wouldn’t give us break help). As Katie signed for her break, I notified her, that my boyfriend was on the boat (71, my team lol) and that I was going to run the ride in manual (but only a little since we had a line). I ran in the ride in manual and let it swing in full power for 75 seconds (in automatic mode, it only swings in full power for 60 seconds). After the ride stopped, it was my turn on break, so I left with my bag to finally get some lunch. My boyfriend asked where I was going, and I told him lunch. He asked if I planned to leave when they got there, and I said no, I was supposed to go on break hours ago. He told me he was leaving, but would return next weekend because many of the rides were down for wind during the weekend, and he wanted the chance to ride more. He also offered to help me move out, and I accepted.

The 28th was the most bittersweet day of work. Kel and Katie established that nobody was getting a cutback to make closing fast and easy. We closed the boat 10 minutes early and the carousel five minutes early. We then got to work on cleaning the carousel super duper good. It was raining that day, so we spent the downtime at the boat cleaning everything. Once we agreed that the carousel was as clean as it would get (it IS 106 years old, after all), we called for area supervision to approve us to leave. While waiting for Herbert, I went to sign my name in the shed with Katie. Katie then gave me a heartfelt speech about how she loved working with me, even though we butted heads a few times. I gave her a heartfelt speech back about how much I appreciated her as a TL. We hugged, and Katie said, “You give really good hugs.” We laughed, and after a few moments, she added, “We should probably head back to controls before Kel thinks we’re making out.” Herbert messed with us a bit before saying, “You’re all good. Bye!” Kel and Mario went to sign their names too, and I gave Mario a big hug, with tears in my eyes, and told him I love him. Mario said he loves me too, and Katie demanded that she gets invited to our wedding. I clocked out for the last time, and went to process out so I could move out. Processing out was fairly easy. By the time I was all processed out and ready to move out, it was already 10pm. I texted Russell to let him know I was on my way back, and he said he’d meet me in the Commons lot. When I got there, I was nervous about talking to security, but it was thankfully a guard who likes me. “Hey, so they’re here to help me move out. Is that ok? Do they need to sign in?” The guard shook his head and laughed. Moving out wasn’t too bad since I packed most of my stuff already (just had to pack my pillows and blankets lol). Getting everything to the car was an adventure since one of my totes weighed more than I did. Soon enough, we got to my house, unloaded everything into the basement, and decided to let Tee (who was with us, btw) meet Seamus (my dog). She thought he was the cutest little dog ever.

On Halloween, I realized at 4:30pm we had no candy for the trick or treaters. How rude! I ran to Walmart, and Walmart had already set out their Christmas candy. No Halloween candy in sight. I ended up buying a Snickers variety, Reese’s, Dubble Bubble (my mom insists on this. Idk why), M&Ms, and gummies for the trick or treaters, and Almond Joys for myself. I then dressed into my Big Bird onesie and passed out candy to the trick or treaters.

November

November 6th, I voted ALL blue. Ok, MOSTLY blue. I voted for one red, because the blue candidate was an asshat. He apparently refused to test rape kits, which was a huge turn-off for me. Plus, the red candidate acted more Democrat than the actual Democrat candidate.

November 8th was wisdom teeth surgery day. I was nervous as all heck, but it ended up not being bad at all. I didn’t look when they put in the IV (my veins suck) and I was knocked out pretty quickly after the medicine was in (then again, my surgery was at 8:30am, so I may have fallen asleep on my own accord and they waited to make sure I was fully out). I can remember some things that were said while I was asleep (which freaked out one of the dentists) and everything that I said after I woke up. Contrary to popular belief, getting ‘loopy’ and ‘high’ isn’t too common after getting them removed. The first thing I said was, “Did the surgery happen yet?” because I thought I had only been asleep for five minutes. The dentist said yes, and went to get the surgeon, and I asked again because I didn’t know if she said yes to me or someone else. I looked at the clock, and noticed I was out for an hour. My whole mouth was numb, so I really didn’t know if it happened or not. The dentist returned, and asked for my mother’s name. I told her, and she left again. She then returned again and my mom was with her. The surgeon then came in and asked if I had questions, I asked him if it was over, and he said yes. I then asked to see the teeth, and he said no because they were in pieces and already thrown out (the dentist thought it was hilarious though). The surgeon then reminded me to not use straws til the wounds were closed, to replace the gauze as often as I needed, and to eat soft foods and incorporate more as I’m comfortable. He then wrote me a prescription for an antibiotic and a prescription for Vicodin. We stopped at CVS to get the medicine, and that’s when my mouth began to hurt. My mom was hesitant to let me take the Vicodin because she was afraid I’d develop an addiction (I kinda was too because I watched every episode of House MD, but I also thought that I was smart and knew when I had a problem).

The bleeding in my mouth stopped after a day and a half, the pain subsided after three days (I never once took a Vicodin), and I was able to eat most foods that weren’t super crunchy (e.g. chips, carrot sticks, crackers, popcorn) and drink from a straw within 10 days.

On November 21st, I went to Georgia with Russell and Tee for Thanksgiving. The trip down took about 13 hours (lots of traffic and construction, plus counting in time to eat and go to the bathroom), and I slept in the backseat for some of the trip. When we got to his aunt’s house, we were greeted by his two cousins (Cailen and Jacob) and Cailen’s boyfriend. His aunts (Sherrie and Tracy) joined us a few minutes later with pizza. Tracy first saw Russell and gave him a hug, and then she saw me sitting in a chair in the corner. She went up to me and said, “We’re a family of huggers, so get used to it.” I laughed and hugged her, saying I was a hugger too. We ate pizza together and his family asked questions to get to know me. Russell thankfully told them ahead of time to not be offended if I’m quiet at first, and that I’d be more open with them after I warm up to them. At bedtime, we put sheets on Sherrie’s roommate’s bed (who had left for the holiday) and fell asleep.

November 22nd was Thanksgiving. I sound asleep until I woke up to Russell shaking my shoulder. I opened one eye, and Russell asked me what I wanted from Starbucks. I muttered my order and fell back asleep. I ended up getting out of bed a few minutes later, and saw the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade was on (I never watched it as a kid). Sherrie asked me if I wanted to taste-test a new recipe of hers, and I said yes. She made pumpkin waffles. The first batch looked good, but didn’t taste like much and had a pillowy texture. I didn’t hate it though. The second batch was ugly looking, but it tasted better and the texture was pancake-like. Russell returned with Starbucks, doughnuts, and McDonald’s breakfast. He got me an Egg McMuffin, and I gave him the Canadian bacon. After breakfast was done, we relaxed for a bit before starting making dinner. I helped out in the kitchen by pitching ideas and finding casserole dishes. While the cooking was going on, we played What Do You Meme and Social Destruction. One moment I’ll remember most was when Russell was talking about all the places he was applying, and he jokingly asked me if I would move to Pittsburgh with him, and I sincerely answered with, “Yes.” When dinner was ready, Tracy went to say the blessing, and Russell kept poking my ribcage, which made me laugh and made Tracy irritated. Once the blessing was done, we ate. It was a great dinner, and the chocolate pecan pie was amazing. After dinner was done, we watched the football game and Jacob kept bugging Russell to play video games. At bedtime, Russell asked me if I meant it when I said yes to moving with him, and I nodded. He then snuggled me and said, “That means a lot to me that you would move with me. The fact that you didn’t even hesitate to say yes or even ask if we could talk about that. The fact that you would move with me, it’s how I know this relationship is for real and that we’ll be together for a long time.”

On November 23rd, I woke up to Sherrie knocking and asking if I wanted to go to Bath and Body Works. Hell yeah, I wanna go! I took a quick shower, and then me, Sherrie, and Tee were on our way (Russell didn’t want to go lol). There was a deal that if you spent $30, you got a tote for $30. I definitely wanted that deal, and I ended up spending.. $144. Oops! We then stopped at Starbucks, and I got a souvenir mug with Georgia on it as well as coffee. We then stopped at home and hung out for a bit while waiting for Cailen to get off work so we could go shopping at The Mall of Georgia. Once we got the message that Cailen was off, we met her at her workplace and went to stop at Cook Out to meet up with Russell’s friend Monkey (not his real name) and his girlfriend Laikyn. I just got a milkshake since we planned to go to Cheesecake Factory for dinner. We all then went to the mall, with Sherrie and Tee in one car, Monkey and Laikyn in another, and me, Russell, Cailen, and her boyfriend in another. The parking lot was PACKED. It took Sherrie about five minutes to get a spot, Monkey about 20 minutes, and it took Russell an hour. Fun stuff. We met up with them at Bath and Body Works (Sherrie found the color tote she wanted there) and then we went off to Spencer’s. I have no idea how, but I managed to spend more at Spencer’s than I did at Bath and Body Works. $153. Whoops! We then went to Cheesecake Factory to get a table, and there was a 45 minute wait. They gave us a buzzer, and we went to Books-a-Million to wait since it was cold and raining outside. We browsed around, and Russell found a book called Gray’s Anatomy (I laughed, and told him the show was Grey’s with an e, not an a). We went back to Cheesecake Factory about 30 minutes later, and we got our table pretty soon afterwards. I got a pasta dish, and it was pretty subpar. I then shared an Oreo cheesecake with Russell since I’m not the biggest fan of cheesecake.

On the 24th, I got to meet Russell’s grandmother, Tee’s mother, Miss Linda (that’s how she introduced herself to me). I was nervous to meet her since she has dementia and lives in assisted living. I was polite and courteous throughout. She asked me for my name a few times, and she asked me what I like to do for fun. I mentioned that I’m a dancer, and she called me Twinkle Toes. After our visit (we only stayed about 20 minutes, since Miss Linda would probably forget we were ever there anyway), we went to Captain D’s, which is a much better version than Long John Silver’s. After lunch, we made the drive down to Commerce, which is where Russell grew up. He gave me a little tour of where he lived, where he went to school, and a hospital that Miss Linda used to run, and I laughed upon seeing a furniture store called Badcock. We were waiting for Russell’s friend Sergio to get off work, so we went to pass time at Tanger Outlets, where I’ve never been before. We drove around, looking at the stores that were there, and out of all the stores there, I wanted to stop at the cookie shop. After we finished driving around Tanger Outlets, we went to Starbucks. Finally, Sergio was off, so we went to see him. We only stayed for a few minutes, and we invited Sergio to come over tomorrow to play games. We then got back to Sherrie’s house and ate our leftovers from Cheesecake Factory.

On the 25th, we decided to stay at home and chill. Sherrie asked me to go to Starbucks with her, and I went because Starbucks. At 3:30pm, Monkey and Sergio came over, and Cailen came over around 4pm to play too. At 6pm, Cailen left, and we went to a Mexican restaurant for dinner. I got a marg and vegetarian nachos, and the marg ended up being stronger than expected. I became dubbed as “drunky” because of how out of it I was after drinking it. I couldn’t remember much of what happened, except for telling everyone how much I love Russell, wanting to go to Atlanta Beach, and rapping Anaconda. Oh, another thing. When Monkey asked me how I met Russell, I kept answering, “Fire Emblem” because Russell doesn’t want Tee to know we met online, let alone on Tinder, and I don’t like lying (Russell had told everyone we met at school, which really isn’t logical since I’ve never gone to his university. The lie I ended up creating was I was with my sister for a college visit and we met while I was there). Russell, Monkey, Sergio, and Tee all played Mario Kart, and I watched.

The next morning, me and Russell woke up, and he asked if I remembered last night. I shook my head, and he filled me in on all the details. I laughed. I then got up to shower since we had to head back to Ohio (back to reality). As we were getting ready to go, Sherrie got up and gave us Christmas presents. I was surprised she got me something too. She got me a pair of leg-warmers, which I was happy about since I could always use leg-warmers in ballet class. I thanked her, and after everything was packed, we went on our way... but first, we stopped in South Carolina to see Russell’s friend Mole (whom I had spoken to on the phone a bit). We met at Mole’s workplace and we talked for a bit. It was good to have a face to his name after speaking to him. After leaving, Russell wanted to see Clemson University, since that’s where Mole goes. After taking a little unofficial tour, we went to Waffle House to get some breakfast. We then hit the road on our way home. Traffic was much better on the way back home... til we got to Ohio. It started snowing pretty hard, and people don’t know how to drive in snow in Ohio. When I saw we were going 30 miles per hour on the highway and had passed a few spin-outs/wrecks, I called my mom and asked her not to take the highway on the way home from the studio. We got to my house safe and sound, and I found Seamus in the living room by himself. I took him outside, and kissed Russell goodbye since he had finals coming up and I wouldn’t see him for a little while. Seamus came over to us and he was growling at Russell. I told him to “be nice to my boyfriend” and Russell called him. Seamus came over, sniffed him, and... barked. I looked over at Tee, who was sitting in the car, and she started cracking up at Seamus barking at Russell. I told Russell to drive carefully, and took Seamus inside.

November 28th was Fiona’s 16th birthday. We asked her if she wanted to go to the studio with us, but she said no. I didn’t want to do nothing for her birthday, so I asked Mom if we could get Dairy Queen for her. We picked Fiona up from Moira’s apartment and we bought her some ice cream.

On the 29th, my dance teacher asked me to join the tap class that took place before my ballet class because there were only two in the class and she want to merge them with the advanced class (the class I take). I asked if I would be in two tap classes, and she nodded. I then asked if I would look ridiculous since I’m 12 years older than them, and she said that I wouldn’t height-wise since Alana is my height and Caroline is taller than me, but I might look more advanced since I’ve been tapping longer than they’ve been alive. I lastly asked if she was asking anyone else to join, and she said she was asking Clare to join too since we were the only two that weren’t in a jazz class. I pondered it for a minute, and agreed. She then asked Clare to join, and Clare didn’t even hesitate to say yes after she found out I was in too. Yay for a second tap class.

December

On December 5th, I decided to get a head-start on joining the tap class so I could get a feel for where they are technique wise and learn their warm-ups.

December was quite a frustrating month for me. I kept getting rejections after rejections. My dad yelled at me about getting a job because he wanted me to get my own phone bill, and yelling at me didn’t help at all! It completely frustrated me.

On December 15th, I got to see Russell. We went to Dave and Busters. He beat me in our first 2 out of 3 for Skee Ball, and I beat him in our second round. I beat him in Mario Kart, which made him mad and me laugh. He beat me at Connect 4 and I beat him at Pac-Man. We also did some of the “win tickets” games, and I won the 500 ticket jackpot on a Plinko-like game after he won 5 tickets. I thought he was going to be mad again, but he looked shocked. “That was honestly impressive” was all he said. After we ran out of tokens on the play card, we got dinner. I got the veggie burger, and it was the best veggie burger I’ve ever eaten! I offered Russell a bite, and he hesitantly accepted. He looked skeptical putting into his mouth, but he looked amazed that it actually tasted good. After dinner, we played some more. After we ran out of tokens, we went to go get prizes. I took home a plush Tommy Pickles, and Russell took home a plush Ren and a Plush Pikachu. We then went to Dairy Queen to eat ice cream and then Russell asked to see my dance studio since it was in the area. I showed him where it was, and pointed out where everything was from the windows. Afterwards, he dropped me off at my house.

December 18th, my mom asked if we wanted to go to the mall when she got home from work. We all said yes (I needed to buy something for my dad still, Fiona wanted to spend time with Mom, and I made Bridgid come with because I didn’t want to walk around the mall by myself since the mall has become a prime spot for human trafficking. Gotta use the buddy system!). Me and Bridgid went to Dick’s to find a present for Dad, and I bought him an 18 pack of orange golf balls. I then took Bridgid to Spencer’s, and limited myself to buying only two shirts. We then went into Forever 21 (Bridgid’s favorite store) and I bought a sports bra (that ended up being too small), leggings (that ended up fitting good), and socks (they had Minnie Mouse on them!). We decided to walk around, and I saw that Payless was having a sale: 40% off the entire store! I bought some nice shoes to wear on Christmas (Dad always gets on my case for wearing sneakers to Christmas) and some tie-dye socks. Finally, we went to find Mom and Fee in the food court. Mom saw all my bags and rolled her eyes. Oops. We then went to leave the mall. We parked at Sears, so we went through Sears to get to the car. As we walked, I saw an ugly Christmas sweater vest, which reminded me of Grandma. I called for Mom, and she came over, saw the vest, nodded knowingly, and led me away.

December 22nd, I met up with Russell for our little Christmas celebration. We drove to IHOP for dinner, and decided to open presents before going in. I got him a Saints sweatshirt that had autographs from Drew Brees and Alvin Kamara and two t-shirts from Spencer’s (one that read “In my defense, I was left unsupervised” and “I didn’t mean to end up this sexy, but shit happens”), my mom got him a Saints football, and Bridgid got him a McDonald’s gift card. He didn’t have a physical present for me because he was getting me a platinum pass to Cedar Point (this man is a keeper!), but Tee got me a blanket that came with cherry blossom lotion, a sleep mask, and peanut butter cups (Russell told her that they’re my favorite). I got Tee a Jack Skellington t-shirt, a jaguar print blanket, and Trident cinnamon gum (because I know that’s her favorite). We then ate dinner in IHOP and then we went to the mall. We then stopped at Walmart to walk around and buy graham crackers for my cookies. We then went to Steak n Shake to spend more time together and get milkshakes for dessert. After we got done, we hung out in a park.

On December 23rd, we went to Moira’s house. I got Moira a body spray and both of them a CrockPot. Moira got me a shirt, leggings, and mascara. Adam got me lotion, socks, and a candle.

Christmas Eve, I made peanut butter blossoms and s’mores cookies. Both recipes turned out amazing. Score for me!

Christmas morning, I set my alarm for 8:30 because I was under the assumption we were going to 9am Mass. When nobody else was up, I hit snooze. I intended to get up shortly after 9am so I could shower, but I ended up sleeping til 10:30. Oops! I dressed for Church and did my hair as neatly as possible, promising myself to shower afterwards. Thankfully, my dad didn’t complain about it. After Church, my dad wanted coffee, but McDonald’s was closed. Thankfully, the Dunkin next door was open. We went in and got coffee and doughnuts. After getting home, the first thing I did was get in the shower. Later on, we went to my uncle’s house on my dad’s side for Christmas dinner. After dinner and presents, we went to my uncle’s house on my mom’s side for presents and dessert. Once we got home, it was time to open our own presents. I got an iPhone 7+ (it was time for my upgrade anyway, so it worked out perfect), a new pillow, a blanket (I love blankets), some clothes, and new bedsheets. It was a wonderful Christmas.

On December 28, I met up with someone I hadn’t seen in a very long time... Ashlyn! We were so excited to see each other, especially since it had been 2.5 years. We got dinner at Applebee’s and got dessert at Menchie’s. I was glad to spend time with my best friend.

New Year’s Eve, I spent with Russell. We got a hotel room for us to spend time together and have some fun. *THE REST IS TMI* I felt a little bad though because Russell had brought Trojans, just in case we went that far, and I was too scared to do it. I got upset, and Russell held me and reassured me that he loves me and that he respects my decision to not do it. Later on, though, I allowed him to do just the tip, so the Trojans got a use after all.

Well, that was 2018. What an amazing year. I came into 2018 single and sad. I’m leaving 2018 taken by an amazing man and happy. Hopefully 2019 will be good too.

#my life #my year #2018

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savvynanatravellove-blog · 7 years

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Great Eats in Colorado Springs

What’s a vacation without trying new restaurants? I mean of course you have to eat regardless of where you may be, but vacation time is a great time to try new restaurants. Whether you’re in search of the perfect burger, like me, or just want to try something different vacation time is the perfect opportunity to do both. And that’s exactly what we do when we’re on vacation.

You don’t necessarily have to step out of your comfort zone and go in search of something very exotic like candied grasshoppers or fried monkey brains. I personally am not that adventurous. But you may want to try an area’s specialty or hot spot.

This summer we spent a week in Colorado Springs visiting my daughter and her family. Now Colorado Springs is hardly lacking in restaurants, just about all the big chains are there. That’s good to know if you’ve a yen for the familiar, which happens sometimes when you’re away from home. This trip gave us the perfect opportunity to sample some local places and also some that are familiar to most folks, but we don’t have in Hawaii. Having said that here’s a short list of what I thought were great eats in Colorado Springs.

Larkburger! This Colorado company has gone all natural. Everything from ingredients, to operations, and packaging is all natural and eco-friendly. They even have a compost bin in every store where you toss the packaging after your meal. This place is really a burger joint. But oh what a burger they serve! Their signature Larkburger is a classic burger made with black angus meat. It’s simply delicious! They also have chicken, vegetarian, turkey, and ahi burgers on the menu. And of course hand-cut fries, salads, and house made dressings and sauces.

A trip to Colorado isn’t complete without a burger from Larkburger! Try an order of their Truffle & Parmesan Fries, you won’t be disappointed! I love pizza, who doesn’t? A pizza from Dion’s is a yummy treat. This pizza place started in New Mexico and now has locations in Colorado (2) and Texas (1). They serve pizza, subs, and salads. Their gourmet pizzas are amazing!

I always judge a pizza by its crust, and Dion’s makes them just right! I’m a purist and like my pizza without all that extra toppings, just cheese please. Their cheese pizza is covered with cheese, not bare spots there!

This next one isn’t a restaurant, it’s a farmer’s market. You’ll be surprised at all the great eats you’ll find at Colorado Springs’ Sunday Market Downtown in Acacia Park. Aside from buying locally grown veggies you can indulge in some terrific mini pies, fresh tamales, handmade chocolates, and gourmet lemonade. It’s really an out door buffet!

Not only is the Sunday Market a place to find great eats in Colorado Springs, it’s a fun place to spend Sunday mornings. Just pick a spot on the lawn and listen to the band while you chow down on your yummy food. Afterwards the kids can play in the playground or splash zone. Best of all admission to the park/market is free!

Qdoba Mexican Eats serves tacos, burritos, nachos, salads, and quesadillas the way you want it. I’m the concept is very much like Chipotle. You choose your entree and order it which your choice of protein, toppings, and sauces. Their servings are huge! You might consider sharing a burrito or an order of Knockout Tacos. Their tortilla chips are fresh and crisp, they’re handcut and made in house daily. They go great with the queso dip! This is a nationwide franchise, unfortunately we don’t have one in Hawaii. Guess I’ll just have to visit my daughter more often!

Amy’s Donuts has donuts galore. There are only 2 locations, Colorado Springs and Columbus, Ohio. If you’re lucky enough to get to one of them your eyes will pop at the colorful variety of donuts they make! If you can think of a topping you’re almost guaranteed to find it on one of Amy’s Donuts! The kids loved it! We had to make several trips to the donut shop in that one week! The boys couldn’t decide which one was their favorite, so we got a variety each time we went.

For our daily coffee fix we hit up Dutch Bros. Coffee. Their Dutch Freeze is a meal in itself.Dutch Bros. is also a franchise with locations mostly on the west coast. In my opinion they’re better than Starbucks. But to be fair I’m not a big Starbucks fan and rarely go there for coffee.

I always see Carrabba’s Italian Grill ads on TV and have heard my mom talk about them. But I had never been, we don’t have them in Hawaii either. So when I saw one in Colorado Springs of course we had to go in for dinner one night. Let me tell you, we were glad we did.It’s similar to Olive Garden, which was always on our list to go to places on the mainland, (we don’t have them here too), but it’s really not.

I still like Olive Garden, but I think prefer Carrabba’s now that I’ve tried it. I ordered their Chicken Marsala and kept my fingers crossed. Marsala it seems is always hit or miss, of course I compare it to my own recipe which is the best. The Chicken Marsala at Carrabba’s came very close to the one I make at home.

They don’t have unlimited breadsticks like they do at Olive Garden. That’s really one of the main reasons we like Olive Garden. But they do bring fresh bread that you can dip in olive oil. My husband loved that part best!

I said earlier sometimes you have a yen for the familiar when you’re away from home. So one of our favorites is Ihop. It really is one of the best places for breakfast. Yes, we actually have a local ihop, but we rarely go. Somehow their service and food is always bad at our local ihop. So we look forward to eating there when we’re on the mainland.

We like it because it’s usually very family friendly. The kids get a kick out of the Funny Face Pancake on the kid’s menu. They order it everytime. Whatever you’re hungry for you’ll almost certainly find it at an ihop. Great pancakes too! There were more places I wanted to try, but couldn’t get to them in just one week. This only means that another visit to Colorado Springs is definitely in the cards for us. (Of course it is as long as my son-in-law is stationed there!)

#colorado springs #larkburger #Carrabba’s Italian Grill #donuts

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6 Ways You’re Secretly Ruining Your Waiter’s Life

One of the biggest culture wars being fought today is between the people who work in food service and the people who think it can’t be all that bad working in food service. As a rule, we tend to side with the folks who have the power to spit in our tacos, but even then, we wind up accidentally making things worse for them every time we eat out. You’ve probably ruined a server’s day this week without even realizing it. For example …

“Hidden Menu” Items And Special Promotions Are A Damn Nightmare To Make

Viral posts about fast food “menu hacks” get tossed around the internet like discuses at an Olympic trial, so odds are you’ve strolled into a Taco Bell armed with a Rolodex of “hidden menu” items you can’t wait to try, such as a chili cheese burrito or a Dorito shell chalupa. The thing is, fast food restaurants operate based on order and routine (that’s why they’re “fast”), so while you may enjoy the feeling of being part of the Cheap Meat Sandwich inner circle, it’s the hourly servers who have to deal with the utter chaos of jury-rigging three different burgers into one bun for the benefit of some rando who thinks they’re too good to order from the menu at fucking Burger King.

Take the Chipotle quesarito, the unholy union of a quesadilla, a burrito, and boiling liquid cheese that could strip the bark off a California redwood. As some Chipotle employees helpfully explained on Reddit, ordering a quesarito will cause them nothing but misery. Not only are they a total hassle to make, but you’re also about to give a poor server second-degree burns so that you could order a burrito that almost certainly won’t wrap properly just to impress your friends.

However, even when an officially sanctioned abnormal or “promotional” item hits menus — something customers are encouraged to buy — it creates chaos and bloodshed. When Starbucks rolled out its Unicorn Frappuccino, a pink and blue monstrosity that looked like a blended Lisa Frank folder, it made sure customers knew that the colorful drink was only available for five freaking days. Naturally, people rushed to see what liquid candy disguised as coffee tasted like, and the baristas were the ones who had to suffer. Braden Burson, a teenage employee from Colorado, posted a video of himself ripping Starbucks Corporate a new one over his now-acute glitter intolerance. “My hands are completely sticky. I have unicorn crap all in my hair and on my nose,” he cringes. “I have never been so stressed out in my entire life.”

It wasn’t only Braden, either. The Starbucks Reddit page had a field day with the Unicorn Frapp, highlighting the plight of the broken baristas unable to keep themselves from drowning in a flood of pink sludge. Blue and pink powders combined with mango syrup choked the air and coated everything like instagrammable napalm. Baristas had to deal with a constant film of unicorn shit clinging to their body like some kind of metaphor for the spoiled dreams of youth. Seriously, this photo of an order of 56 Unicorn Frappuccinos will one day be shown as part of a trial in the Hague:

“All You Can Eat” Promotions Screw Servers Out Of Tips

We’re not here to shit on the idea of eating as many appetizers, bread sticks, miniature shrimps, and/or bowls of Mongolian barbecue as you can. That’s the American Way, goddammit. We simply feel that it’s our duty to inform you that your intestines aren’t the only ones suffering through these glutinous promotions.

You see, all-you-can-eat promotions bring in customers who normally don’t eat out, because they’re generally pretty cheap. We’ve all been there: You spend most of the week eating asparagus and butter sandwiches because that’s all your broke ass can afford, and then along comes Olive Garden with a tantalizing offer of never-ending pasta for ten goddamned dollars. So you show up with an empty stomach, consume roughly two meals’ worth of food, and then try to take what you can home. It’s a steal … especially from the servers who waited on you, whose earnings are disappearing at the same rate as the pasta bowls. Odds are if you were lured out of your home by the promise of a buttload of cheap food, you’re not going to be leaving much of a tip. After all, Oliver Twist didn’t slip a 20 into the jacket of the guy serving the gruel.

So all-you-can-eat patrons don’t tip big (partly because their bill is so low, which is the whole reason they went out), but another big problem is that they stay forever. It takes a while to eat your entire weight in shrimp, so these folks will camp out at their table for hours, which prevents their servers from getting new customers. Anyone who has ever waited tables before knows how important it is to get multiple tables in a night just to break even in tips by the end of their shift, and a family of five gasping their way through a third round of plates at Golden Corral clogs up the flow of business.

Waiters have been complaining about these practices forever. Restaurant owners may claim that it drums up more business, meaning more money for the staff, but the math on these promotions doesn’t add up. They work their staff harder, they get paid less to serve more food per billed line item, and the buffet gobblers keep tables from opening up and bringing in new customers. Restaurants with all-you-can-eat promotions both target customers who make less money and force their employees to work for less money. It’s a delicious double-edged sword.

Large Parties Leave Terrible Tips (Which Get Taxed)

When you go to a restaurant with a large party (whenever you’re able to wrangle more than half a dozen of your friends to be at the same place at the same time, so either you’re going to the prom, a wedding, or a funeral), there’s often an “automatic tip” added on of 15, 18, or even 20 percent. The reason for this is that, despite it being a lot of extra effort keeping track of ten people ordering completely different entrees — some with tomatoes and some with don’t you dare put any tomatoes anywhere near this fucking thing — something called the magnitude effect kicks in, which basically means that people tend to tip less percentage-wise the larger a bill becomes.

The auto-tip was supposed to combat the magnitude effect, and for a while, it more or less did its job. Then in 2014, servers got slapped with an IRS law which says that any automatically added gratuity is now considered earned wages instead of tips, and that’s a huge difference. We apologize in advance for the upcoming math.

Say a party of ten puts together a bill of $200 and there’s a 20 percent auto-gratuity of $40. That $40 is already used to tip the busboy, cook, and the guy whose job appears to be chain-smoking and occasionally wiping off some menus. That means that, for handling a large party over the span of probably an hour or more, the server made maybe $10. According to the IRS, that $10 tip isn’t a tip at all, but “non-tip wages,” which are subject to Social Security tax, Medicare tax, and, of course, income tax. Not only does that dent their income, but the server also probably didn’t get a chance to work many other tables, because large parties require a lot of attention and tend to stay for well over an hour, meaning that they couldn’t earn any non-automatic tips from other tables with smaller parties. The government is apparently so hard up for cash that it needs to nickel-and-dime people who are already making less money than the “street artist” standing outside the restaurant.

Not that servers have to worry too much about figuring out the taxes of their auto-gratuities, because you can’t tax zero dollars. One of the major effects of the IRS law is that, rather than having to report extra income from auto-gratuities to the IRS, chains like Outback Steakhouse and TGI Friday’s have eliminated the auto-tip altogether. Which means the magnitude effect is creeping back in, with many servers seeing their biweekly pay drop from about $1,000 to $600-$800. But maybe there’s a silver lining here. Maybe IRS employees like having spit in all of their food.

Working A Drive-Thru Is Ridiculously Dangerous

Ask any server, and they’ll tell you the most stressful part of their job is the customers (and their hair perpetually smelling like old bread caught in a grease trap). Drive-thrus seem like an obvious solution — you have minimal interaction with the customer, they order quickly, pay for their food, and leave immediately. It’s ideal for customers too, because honestly, most times you go to a drive-thru, you’re in no mood / condition / level of sobriety to really deal with or be seen by other people. However, while it’s true that you might have less interaction with difficult customers while handing food out of a window, a lot more of them are actively trying to kill you.

Grewal-Digital/iStock This resembles the opening of a horror movie for a reason.

People commit armed robbery at drive-thrus all of the time. A drive-thru coffee shop in Kentucky was robbed four times in the span of a couple months. A McDonald’s in Florida was robbed twice in two weeks, which honestly seems downright restrained for Florida. There are lots of reasons for these sprees. Drive-thrus tend to be open earlier and later, some even 24 hours — you’ll note that robbers aren’t huge fans of broad daylight. Also, unlike gas stations, which mostly get paid with debit or credit cards nowadays, people still largely buy their nuggets and fries with cash, and the cash drawer is usually right there at the window. Finally, most fast food joints are located right near major intersections or highway exits, making drive-thru robbery really convenient in terms of getaways. Drive-thrus are essentially magic windows full of money and delightful food — a combination robbers find irresistible.

But even when they’re not going for the register, there’s something about being behind the wheel of a car that makes people angry — especially if they’re only going 5 mph and waiting for a stack of burgers. The Bureau of Labor Statistics has found that workers in restaurants that had a drive-thru are twice as likely to be assaulted as workers at sit-down restaurants like Olive Garden or Red Lobster. The fact that a Red Lobster is a better work environment than anything with a drive-thru means having to be anywhere near a serving window is a violation of your human rights.

And if the risk of getting shot isn’t enough for you to consider, then there are the endless streams of dipshit YouTube pranksters trying to spook you to consider. Drive-thru workers should start robbing the customers.

McDonald’s All-Day Breakfast Doubles Their Workload (So They Serve You Old Food)

There’s nothing we want more than what we can’t have, even if that something is a lukewarm Egg McMuffin at 2 o’clock in the afternoon. One of the greatest moments in customer peer pressure history occurred when McDonald’s decided to start offering its customers a limited all-day breakfast menu. McDonald’s saw sales spiking, and the resulting publicity was better than anything it could’ve hoped for from that Michael Keaton movie. And it’s great! Who among us can say they’ve never tasted the bitter defeat of arriving at McDonald’s to order a bag of breakfast burritos, only to discover that breakfast stopped being served minutes ago?

However, while customers might love it, the employees hate it. McDonald’s employees are the target of a lot of public ridicule (there’s an entire political party and accompanying news network that revolves around thinking up reasons to deny burger-flippers minimum wage), but that doesn’t stop the job from being thankless and hard. That has only gotten worse with the all-day breakfast, which requires employees to run the same extensive breakfast-to-lunch cleanup of their stations every time a stoner wants a bacon, egg, and cheese bagel at noon. At $7.25 an hour, how much could you be bothered to give a shit about re-cleaning your station every time someone orders an egg, cross-contamination be damned?

McDonald’s employees have, however, found a loophole — which is not a word you ever want to hear concerning the people who feed you. Many will cook up a bunch of eggs at the beginning of the day and stock them in food warmers for afternoon use. Hashbrowns are a quick and easy thing to throw in the fryer alongside the french fries, but pancakes don’t make it to the griddle next to the hamburgers; they’re just microwaved. So know that the second after 10:30 a.m., ordering breakfast means you’re eating reheated leftover McDonald’s. Nobody deserves that.

Children Ruin Dining For Everyone

Kids are like ironic mustaches that you can’t shave off — you think it’s delightful, but you’re really just annoying the shit out of people everywhere you bring it. One of the most unnatural habitats for children has to be the restaurant, which to them looks like a playground with glass and knives. And who has to deal with these infant tornadoes when dining out? Their parents? Ha ha, no. It’s the servers who have to become de facto babysitters..

Small children make dining experiences categorically worse. They deface the aesthetic of the restaurant by drawing on the walls or even scratching them with coins. They bother diners by blasting their iPads (meant to pacify them) at full volume. Parents will bring tiny snacks (such as Goldfish crackers or Cheerios) to distract the kids until the food comes, only to have them thrown everywhere and ground into the floor. Aisles are blocked with high chairs and strollers, making spills inevitable. All this mess makes it harder to clean up, which raises wait times for tables, meaning servers are getting fewer customers and those customers are getting more irate. That’s actually the most important point: Kids tend to make the dining experience less enjoyable for every customer, which can impact their generosity when it’s time to calculate the tip.

Some diners may recognize how much their server is struggling with a particular table and its particular high-chaired bastard king and be sympathetic. However, the party that brought the child almost never is. According to a survey of servers at Cornell, families with children are notorious for tipping below average, meaning kids probably possess the most disparate effort-to-reward ratio of all diners.

Understandably, restaurants dislike allowing small children, but this has become a contentious debate. They can receive horrible backlash for even thinking about banning children, and there are no shortage of mommy blogs that will happily point the blame for their disruptive children straight at the servers, offering helpful “suggestions” for dealing with their darling children, including “Come back to the table often so the child doesn’t get restless” and “Don’t allow us to order a dessert and then discover that it’s sold out” — the latter of which you may recognize as something that is literally impossible to avoid. That link also includes a helpful letter full of instructions you can print out and hand to your server, as if you two are trying to coordinate a flawless meal for a foreign head of state instead of a group of children who are too young to be expected to sit still in a public setting for longer than five minutes. The general retort from both restaurants and servers is that Applebee’s is not a daycare, and waitstaff already have their hands full dealing with adults who behave like children, which is frustrating for parents who expect you to feed and entertain their children for $2.19 plus a shitty tip.

Unfortunately for servers, the messy ethics of banning children means they will have to deal with these little poop tornadoes until the end of days. Sure, fine dining might get away with restricting children, but it’s not like Outback Steakhouse can pretend it’s too good for screaming toddlers. People show up there in sweatpants to eat fried onions.

Isaac actually kind of enjoyed working at Chipotle while he was in college, and still has the guacamole recipe memorized. Follow him on Twitter.

Also check out 5 Apocalyptic Realities Working At A Dying Chain Restaurant and 5 Disgusting Truths About Every Restaurant (From A Chef).

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