#i had a different font in mind for this post but i couldn't get it to work! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ohtobeleah · 1 year

Text

Enterprise // Jake Seresin

Chapter Five: Live In Clover

Summary: After you discover Jake has a rat in his ranks, you fall off the side of a cliff when you dive deeper into what exactly is going on. Leading you into a rather dangerous situation.

Warnings: Drug Use. Gun violence. Mentions of death. Jake Seresin x F!reader

Word Count: 5.3k

Author Note: Happy Monday! I know I’ve gone rouge with the posting schedule with this one but I had some time yesterday and thought I’d share it.

“Y/n!?” Jake watched you peeled out of Bob’s gravel driveway and sped off in the direction of his not so humble abode. There was nothing but panic mixed in with the burning sensation of his nerve endings lighting up with rage. Running his hand furiously through his hair, Jake exhaled an extended huff of breath as he ran back inside. “Fucking christ–Bob!?”

Jake felt like he couldn't breathe as he stormed into Bob’s home, rage evident in his eyes as he slammed his hand down on the kitchen bench right beside Robert Floyd. Scaring the ever living Christ out of the man who sat minding his own business in his own home at his own laptop in his own kitchen.

“Where’s Widow going in my car?!” Jake hissed through gritted teeth as Bob turned to face Jake, still sitting on the swivel stool he’d been perched on all morning. He didn’t flinch at his boss's anger now that he’d been startled out of the research he was doing, used to the way Jake could lose his temper quickly.

“Said she left something in the car, why? where’s she going?” Bob wasn’t listening properly, barely in the conversation at all before Jake slammed the laptop shut that was open on the kitchen bench. “Hey, don't touch my stuff in my own home! Be thankful I even let you in the goddamn door!”

“Bob! I asked YOU where SHE went! she’s hurt goddammit!” Bob again didn’t flinch, not one muscle shuttered as he watched Jake's nostrils flare with anger as the vein in his neck began to grow. Bulging with rage. He was sure if Jake didn't cool his temper that the top of his head would pop off.

“Hangman, Widow isn’t some damsel in distress, she's you in a different font, she can hold her own.” Bob caught the way Jake's face softened slightly as Bob spoke sense. “Your sudden lapse in judgement must have something to do with the lack of blood pumping to your dick and not your brain where it should be going.” Bob was growing impatient, he didn't want to be brought back into this crap and yet here he was. Arguing with Jake Seresin in his own kitchen over some girl who suddenly held Jake's heart in the palm of her hand.

“Robert–”

“And don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about, King–” Bob mocked the brooding blonde who stood before him before reaching for his phone, removing Jake’s hand from his laptop “And don’t break my shit either! I fixed your girl up and if you keep running around with her I’ll be pulling a bullet or six from you too!” Bob liked you, he truly did, for a South Side Spider you were as smart and strong as they came. Bob knew that you had an undeniable mean strike, you ran zero to death row faster than any Gang Leader he’d ever met and you were only just stepping into your new role.

Bob respected that you could fight your own battles, he didn't care all that much how you did it so long as he was kept out of it, but he also knew deep down that you were Jake’s one weakness regardless if Jake would ever admit it himself or not.

“Bob this is NOT the time to be fucking with me! We gotta find her, wherever the fuck she went and when I find her her, she be lucky if I don’t strangle her myself.” Jake exclaimed heavily before reaching for his phone on the windowsill, calling you multiple times, all of them going to voicemail. Texting you in hopes you'd catch on to how angry he was.

To South Side Spidy: “Get your fucking ass back here with my car!”

To South Side Spidy: “For fuck sake Y/n you are injured!! Don’t forget that!”

“Bob get in the Jeep, I’ve got a fuckin feeling she’s going to mine.” Bob could almost hear Jake’s teeth grinding against each other as he huffed, looking down at his phone shaking his head.

“Why do I gotta go?” Jake shot Bob the most deadly look of pure annoyance.

“BECAUSE SHE COULD BE FUCKIN HURT! God if Coyote was right and Bradshaws got the place surrounded she’s walking straight into a trap she won’t walk out of.” Bob was quick to comply, knowing that it was best to go along with Jake when he got like this, although Bob really didn’t want to be brought back into this life, he knew Jake needed him more than ever right now, he was spiralling quickly and all because of you.

“Shes gonna be the death of you man–fucking look at you.” Bob sighed, shaking his head in defeat. “As much as you fucking suck Jake you’re smarter than this.” Bob questioned Jake's actions once more as he stood from his place at the kitchen bench, grabbing his laptop with a sigh. “I hope you know what you're doing man because she's going to stab you in the back the second she gets a chance to.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~

You watched on with no emotion evadent, no expression present, as Coyote's lifeless body fell to the ground at your feet, watching as the blood ran out of the back of his head which had been entirely blown out. You stumbled back, panting heavily after exerting so much energy, trying to wrap your head around the entire situation you now found herself in.

“What the fuck did I just do?” Looking around there were files scattered everywhere. It looked like there wasn't an inch of Jake's study that hadnt been touched, everything had been combed through with a fine tooth comb. “What were you up to Javy–” You mumbled to yourself as you spotted the phone which Coyote had been talking to Rooster on. Upon further inspection, you noticed it was still unlocked, still on call with a private number.

“Bradshaw–” You spoke into the phone as you held it up to your ear. “When I find you, I’m gonna fuckin kill you.” It wasn't an empty threat, but a promise. “Do you hear me?”

“Looking forward to the date darlin–” You hung up before anything else not wanting to hear his voice at a time like this, curiosity did however, kill the cat when you opened the messages app down in the bottom right-hand corner of the screen, gravitating towards one name. Adder Boy.

To Adder Boy: “So…. are you going to tell her she ordered an immunity drink or am I?”

“No–” Your heart dropped into the pit in your stomach, was Jake in on this the entire time? Did he set this up so Coyote could do the dirty work Jake couldn’t bring himself to do? Did he send Bradsahw straight to your house? “No no fuck–”

Your mind ran wild as you felt your skin flush with immense heat, your eyes watered and your bottom lip quiver. You were breaking down, allowing yourself to feel a moment of utter betrayal as you stood in the middle of Jake’s trashed study.

“Oh god–” Looking around, you had no idea what to do next or where to go. You weren't safe anywhere. Not here with or without Jake, no at your own home, your own men were jumping ship left and right because they knew you were sinking. “Oh god–” Your thigh was throbbing from the stab wound and with every staggered step you took? The more blood trickled out into the now ruined denim. Placing Coyote's phone on the empty bookcase you took a moment to lean up against.

Tears began streaming out of your eyes and down your bloodied cheeks, your right eye significantly larger from Javy’s fist. Your busted bottom lip quivering faster as gentle sobs turned into painful cries.

“FFUUCK!” You shouted as loud as you could before turning around to push everything which cluttered Jake’s desk off the side before limping out of the study, letting yourself succumb to the sorrow and utter anguish you felt from being betrayed.

How the hell did you not see this coming.

As you slid down the wall just outside the study. Your hand came to cover your mouth as you cried a little louder, losing all control over your emotions for the second time in your life. The first when your father died right before your eyes not three weeks prior.

You unbuttoned the jeans you wore and carefully slid them down your legs, revealing the damage that had been done by the blade which sliced your leg open. You covenant Katipo Spider tattoo, the mark of your enterprise slashed straight through as if Coyote knew just where to aim. The black spider with the distinctive red marking now completely cut in two. A symbol of the fallen if you had ever seen one.

“Oh, God!” You couldn't stop yourself from crying as you removed your shirt, tearing it apart to make a makeshift bandage before wrapping it tightly around your thigh, covering the degraded tattoo. You sat slumped against the wall almost entirely naked in the hall, bloodied and beaten. Catching yourself before you fell any further down the whole of despair you were creating, you kicked your boots off and removed the jeans from your legs entirely, using the wall to help you push yourself off the floor and find your gun.

As you skulked back through Jake’s study in your bra and panties like you had done multiple times before, this time you saw nothing but red, nothing but revenge as you felt your heart beating rapidly out of your chest. Bob might’ve been right when he said your shoulder would recover without much of a problem but with torn stitches, you weren't so sure anymore. The once white bandage was now stained a deep red.

“Fuck this.” You mumbled before limping around to open Jake’s top draw, picking up the baggie of what you could only assume was cocaine and the tiny spoon next to it. At this point, you weren't even concerned if it was cut with impurities unknown. Within the space of forty eight hours, You’d been set up, shot, fucked, stabbed and beaten half to death so if a little blow was what was going to take you out in the end then so be it. Sniffing the white powdery substance from the spoon through your nose, you tossed your head back as you felt your blood run throughout your body.

“When you live, live in clover for when you’re dead, you’re dead all over.” You mumbled before turning to Coyote's lifeless body. “Ain’t that right Javy?”

***~***~***~***~***~***~

If someone had asked you how you managed to get to the bottom of the staircase, you wouldn’t have been able to give them a clear and definitive answer, all you knew is that your mind was running wild with the theory you had managed to come to a collusion to all on your own with the information you had head. Jake ‘The Hangman’ Seresin had set you up and Jake Seresin was unknowingly a dead man walking. Leaning back against the staircase you sat at the very bottom, gun loaded and drawn waiting for the broad-shouldered man to walk through his own front door straight into a hail of bullets. You were pissed off, high, heartbroken and riddled with betrayal, and there was nothing anyone could say or do to ease that pain.

“I told you she’d be fucking here!” Jake spat as he pulled up in the driveway. “The one place we were told not to go–she goes!!” Bob just listened, he wasn't in the mood to argue. Following Jake up to the front door. Trailing his feet in the gravel reluctantly. “Just proved that she isnt as smart as she thinks she is–doesn’t use her fuckin head Bob.” Jake groaned from the other side of the front door as he pulled it open. “For all we know she’s dead in the fu….”

*Bang* *Bang* *Bang*

“Holy FUCK!” Jake shouted before slamming the door shut, retreating back outside diving on top of Bob who followed right behind him. “Who the fuck? Y/N? is that you?” He shouted waiting for an answer before he heard the sound of manic female laughter.

“You sound shocked Seresin? Weren’t expecting me to be alive were you?” You called from the other side of the door. Jake looked at Bob who was squirming underneath him.

“Get off me!” Bob groaned, hitting Jake’s chest. “Get the fuck off me man!”

“Y/n what are you talking about?” Jake huffed getting up off of Bob and bringing himself back to his feet. “Let me in, what’s going on?” He tried convincing you, but you were high on something otherworldly.

“Uh Uh, already let you in once Jake and that got me shot, couldn’t do it yourself could you?” You sobbed before slowly opening the door, gun drawn high revealing yourself to a very shocked Jake, anger quickly taking over as he studied your beautiful body, now beaten up and bloodied. The fact you were in your underwear flying over his head due to more important factors, like how much blood you looked like you’d lost due to whatever wound was covered by the soaked ripped shirt.

“What the fuck happened to you pretty girl?” Jake's voice was soft as Bob tried pulling him back slightly, knowing the look in someone’s eyes when they aren’t themselves.

“Jake, she's high.” Bob quietly whispered in his ear over his shoulder. “Just look at her eyes.” Bob wasn't wrong, he knew the signs and what to look for, it was his job after all. Jake did as he was told and really paid attention to your eyes, noticing how you couldn’t focus on anything for more than a few seconds. He noticed just how badly beaten you were, from your swollen eye, to your eyebrow and beautiful lip split, your nose bloodied and your neck bruised from something. “She's either taken something or been giving something–”

“I am NOT your pretty girl!” You hissed before letting another sob leave your mouth. “You should see the other guy! Couldn’t bring yourself to do it so you got Coyote to huh? Well, guess what? Should’ve picked a better fighter, Jake, because he’s smeared across your fuckin study as we speak!” Jake couldn’t figure out what was happening, what you were saying. To you it all sounded so clear, so easily put together, the bigger picture finally being revealed to you after moving a few puzzle pieces around.

“Y/n, drop the gun yeah? I’m not here to hurt you? Let’s just talk, alright? I wanna make sure you’re okay.”

“Fuck you you piece of North Side shit–”

“Y/n you’re bleeding pretty bad maybe you should come back to Bob’s and he’ll fix you up again?”

“You know Jake, personally I would’ve chosen Southern Comfort for an immunity drink but I guess you and I are just two different people, now aren’t we?” You stumbled a little before your tears began to overflow your eyes once again. This was a side to you Jake was unfamiliar with, he had never seen you show sadness to this extent before, let yourself be so vulnerable. Your words felt like knives stabbing through his chest. You knew about the drink, how he fixed your chance to prove yourself, You must’ve thought Jake didn’t think you were capable of holding your own, You couldn’t have been more wrong.

“Y/n give me the FUCKIN gun! Before you do something else stupid!” Jake was growing tired of you very quickly, he knew if you didn’t get the help you needed soon you’d drop dead from blood loss or possibly an overdose–especially if you took the shit Mav left him last week, coke riddled with fillers worse than any drug. Matt was one Jake's closest men, trusted like a brother he could count on him for just about anything… except for clean cocaine.

“You know what Jake? Fine!” You fiddled with the gun in your possession before unloading the clip, throwing it across the entryway. “Fuckin do this shit the same way I did with Javy, I’m not fuckin scared of you!” You cried before Jake raised his eyebrow, gesturing for Bob to go check on Coyote upstairs while he dealt with you.

“You damn well should be Y/n cause judging by the state you're in you're not going to last very long against me.” Jake was dead serious as he took strides towards you, he had no intention of fighting you in your current state but needed to get close enough to be able to get you in a hold. “Let’s go, pretty girl, show me what you got” He held his hands up to cover his face in fists “Come to daddy.”

You swung straight for Jake’s nose but he was too quick and wrapped both his hands around your wrist, twisting you around and locking his arm around your neck, bringing your back flush against his chest as you clawed at his forearm.

“Y/n I’m not going to fight you, just relax please you look like you’ve been through hell.” You kicked your foot straight back into Jake's kneecap, hyperextending it as he let go of you, your fist went straight for his nose as you turned on your heels, the same nose you broke when you first met Jake. Sending Jake stumbling you swung again for his right cheek but Jake dodged just before, ducking under before throwing you over his shoulder.

“THAT’S ENOUGH!, FUCK! Y/n I swear if you weren’t bleeding and drugged fucked outta your mind I’d beat you half to death for this shit!” He spat as he carried you to the car. Too much blood rushing to your head at once made you feel weaker than ever. Jake flung you into the back of Bob’s Jeep and quickly locked the doors from the outside so you couldn’t get out, too tired anyway, you passed out soon after your head hit the seat.

“Fuckin chill for a moment!” While Jake rubbed his bloodied nose Bob ran out shaking his head.

“She's right Hangman, he’s gone but your study doesn’t look too good eit.. again? Really?” Bob couldn’t help but remember the last time you broke Jake’s nose.

“NOT THE FUCKIN TIME Bob!” He hissed as he spat blood onto the ground “Just get her back to yours, I’ll stay here and try fuckin find out what’s happened.” If you looked carefully you could see steam coming from Jake’s ears.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to take care of her by myself Jake, she’s in a really bad way, I don’t even know if she’ll..”

“She’ll make it Bob, don’t even think that way, Widows a stubborn bitch but I’ve never been more sure of something in my life then I am right now, she’ll make it, just take her to Mickey’s, he’ll know what to do.” Jake interrupted before he slowly paced back and forth with his head tilted back, his other hand resting on his waist.

Bob nodded before hopping into the Jeep, a passed out you laying across the backseat. Your hair was covered in blood and your semi-naked body was completely littered with bruises. Bob was nervous, an ex-Adder in Katipo territory was sketchy but hopefully Mickey, your trusted medical expert who dealt with all of your ladies of the night would see the desperation of the situation.

As Bob drove away Jake stood in the middle of the driveway wondering what was going on around him. What had gotten under your skin in such a way and who the fuck was responsible for bringing the strongest women in Fitzroy to her knees, not aware that he was, in fact, the real reason for your breakdown.

***~***~***~***~***~***~

As Jake manoeuvred his way over all the scattered files and books on the floor in his trashed study he was quick to notice the bloodied heap lying adjacent from his desk. Walking hesitantly towards it Jake noticed it was indeed, Javy Machado. Checking his pulse Jake sighed before stepping over the dead man's body mumbling to himself as he looked around for anything that would tell him what happened here.

“Oh, Coyote, what did you get yourself into hey? Help me out here.” Jake noticed the unfamiliar phone sitting on the bookshelf. “huh?” He huffed, picking to phone up and trying Coyote’s password “Adder”

“Bingo” Jake smirked as he scrolled through the last app opened, his messages with himself, seeing the message that Coyote had sent him after you walked out of Drums. “Fucking hell.” He sighed as he realised how you must have found out about the drink. He exited the chat before noticing one name he never thought he’d see in his own man's phone. “Bradshaw.” Jake scrolled through countless messages between the men and saw nothing but red.

Rooster: “I Need info Javy, remember what’s on the table.”

Rooster: “You need the house clear, get them out of there so you have a chance to look through everything and anything you can on either of them. I can't take em down by myself if they run together.”

Jake couldn’t believe his own eyes, his own men were against him. Coyote was a rat and he didn’t even smell it. Enraged, Jake's hand went flying into the plastered wall behind him.

“MOTHERFUCKER!!” He screamed, unable to control his anger any longer “MY OWN FUCKING GANG, against my EMPIRE! God fucking dammit Coyote you got of lightly, I would’ve tortured you relentlessly!” He spat aggressively as if Javy’s dead body would reply.

Jake grabbed as much as he could fit in his car, from clothes to weapons to important documents before he made his way over to the southside after Bob, hoping Mickey and Bob could help you, his Queen, because despite your ability to boil Jake’s blood like no other person could, he needed his girl more than ever, and despite how much you resented Jake right now?

You needed him.

***~***~***~***~***~***~

Mickey’s house was located in one of the nicer suburbs of the south, a quiet three-bedroom home, he was one of the more fortunate. You took care of the people who had your back and Mickey, the big brother he was, was always there for you. Driving through the South Side of Fitzroy had Bob on the edge of his seat, feeling anxious, he reached under his seat for the gun he carried for desperate situations. If he ever needed to use it to protect himself or his family, he wouldn't hesitate.

Fumbling around he found nothing, shaking his head before slamming both his hands down onto the steering wheel of his Jeep with frustration. “Shit!” Bob remembered quickly that he had given his beloved wife, Lexi, the gun from his Jeep before sending her off to her mothers with his baby girl Molly.

“Just in case bub, just keep it with you yeah?” A double-edged sword, he found comfort in knowing his family was safe yet was left without a weapon as he drove through the south with its most prized possession in the back of his car. You.

Arriving without incident at Mickey’s house, Bob couldn’t have run any faster to the front door, banging furiously on the front door.

“Mickey!!” Open up, man!” Bob shouted through the wooden door hoping Mickey was home. “Fanboy!! Open the fucking door! It's Widow!”

Mickey Garcia had been sleeping the day away after having been out on the town. His biggest vice was one of the dancers at his favourite strip club on the strip downtown. Groggy and yawning, Mickey opened his front door as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Confusion taking over as he saw Robert Floyd standing on his front porch out of breath and panicked as ever. He was a long way from no man's land.

“Floyd?” Mickey questioned as he frowned. “The fucks going on? What are you doing here–?”

“Y/n, she's in the car.” Bob tried to get out as he felt himself out of breath. “She took something, it's bad man, you gotta help me.”

“Where?” It was all Mickey had to say before he felt his feet following Bob back to the jeep parked haphazardly in his driveway.

“The backseat, she’s fucked up bad Mick, you of all people know I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t desperate.” Mickey knew Bob was right, rushing towards the Jeep Mickey saw you laying on your side in nothing but her underwear. Beaten, bloodied and unconscious. Barely breathing.

“WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED BOB!!?”” Mickey shouted out before he was nearly ripping the door of its hinges to check your pulse, faint but still there he was beyond that of mortified seeing the girl he watched grow up to become a version of yourself he knew you never wanted to be. It had been three fucking weeks. Now look at you, covered in your own blood and looking nothing like your regular well groomed presentable self. Helping Mickey pulled your limp body out of the backseat Bob tried explaining all he knew.

“I couldn’t tell you, Jake’s still at his house trying to figure that out, all I know is that Javy Machado is dead and Widow’s taken something Mick, I don’t know for sure but the way she was acting makes me feel like it was blow, dirty to, not the shit you’d get here.” Carrying you under his arms as Mickey wrapped yours legs around his waist.

“What's she doing with Hangman?” Mickey hadn’t heard from you in a few days, he already thought that was suspect but now he just couldn't compute what he was hearing, what was happening. “And what the hell are you doing back in this shit man I thought you got out?”

“Was I ever really out?” Bob huffed, sick of that stupid fucking question. Micky just sighed, both men working in tandem to carry your near lifeless body into Mickey's home.

“Fuck me, Floyd, what have we got ourselves into now?”

***~***~***~***~***~***~

The only thing you couldn’t figure out was what hurt more. The feeling of Mickey and Bob working their rough yet gentle hands over your wounds, fixing you to the best they could or the fact you could hear everything Jake was saying, every word spoken between the trio. You could hear everything clear as day, but despite your desperate attempts to open your mouth and speak, You just couldn’t. You could feel every stitch, every sting of the needle, every throb of every bruise, your body now naked as you laid limp and semi-conscious.

“It's mangled, she won’t be able to walk without help for I don’t know how long and who shot her? That shits older than this?” Mickey pointed to the bullet wound in your shoulder. “It's got old stitch work in it from I guess cookie cutter Cathy over here?” Mickey teased, referring to Bob who was heavily focused on re-stitching your shoulder.

“Please don’t mess around while you're jabbing a needle into me Fanboy.” You tried to speak as your eyes rapidly fluttered behind your eyelids, just begging for your mouth to open.

“Okay one fuck you, my work is clean and two, I’d much rather be a straight sailing Sally.” Bob remarked as he worked on your shoulder as he laughed at Mickey’s comment. Mickey ‘Fanboy’ Garcia had watched Jake and Y/n interact when you were younger and was always aware that someday when you would run the Katipo, Jake would play a contributing factor one way or another. He just didn't think it would be so soon.

Although Mickey was Katipo through and through, he had nothing personal against Jake nor Bob, a lucky man just like Bob who was able to procure a small humble home on the very edge of the South Side right at the very beginning of no man’s land, Mickey’s door was always open to anyone who needed a safe haven, including the Capo of the South's rival mob, Jake Seresin.

“Bradley Bradshaw.” Jake sighed before tilting his head back again as he sat down in the world’s most uncomfortable chair in the corner of the room, his nose starting to gush blood once again as Mickey threw him a cloth to soak up the thick substance.

“Are you going to tell him you ordered him too? Or the fact you watched him fire a slug into my left shoulder when you could’ve shot him first!” Again, nothing came out. You were just lying there, screaming out for someone to hear you.

“Fuck this is an all out war isn’t it? how many men have you got for sure that aren't dirty?” Mickey asked as he licked his lips, focusing on the work he was doing trying to stitch your thigh the best he could.

“Mickey–you have no idea how far into a war we’re already in.”

“Well Bob doesn’t want in, which I understand, Lexi is probably going crazy wondering where the fuck he is right now.” Bob only nodded slightly as he finished bandaging your left shoulder for the second time in three days. “So minus him, Harvard and Fritz, I don’t trust the rest of the guys, if Javy was dirty any of them could be.” Jake’s voice was muffled slightly as he spoke through his mouth, unable to breathe through his nose. It distorted his voice a little which only made Mickey laugh.

“I don’t want you or any of your fucking men near me Jake, and stop talking for fuck sake your nose makes you sound like Kermit the fucking frog.”

“You sound like Kermit the frog, she really got you good, didn’t see?” Mickey chuckled to himself as he worked. “Why’d she take a swing at you anyway?” Mickey asked before stitching another stitch in your thigh.

“Tried protecting her the other night when I sent her into Drums, I instantly regretted the idea when she actually agreed to it, should’ve known the suborn bitch wouldn’t back down so I asked her to order a drink my guys know not to bring any harm to the people who ordered it, regardless who they are or who they run with.”

“God you’re so deep in your own lies you probably can't even admit it to yourself that you really are just trying to fucking screw me over, had to make it look like you cared though in front of Bob right?”

“You’re a fucking idiot if I ever knew one Seresin, how are you ganna fix this?” Mickey shook his head.

“I was hoping you could help Fanyboy, you know her better than anyone.” Jake was right, Mickey did know you better than anyone, so the fact that one little drink set you off this much couldn’t possibly be the entire reason.

“To be honest Jake I think there’s more to the story then you think, but I have no idea when you’ll find that out because we’ll be lucky if Widow wakes up any time soon.”

“You're damn fucking right there’s more two the story Mickey, HES WORKING WITH ROOSTER!” You were in a full blown existential crisis within yourself, losing a battle you were barely fighting anymore as you gave up trying to communicate. Your body was in a tremendous amount of pain, everywhere hurt with a radiating feeling of numbness and throbbing intensity, but nothing hurt more than the feeling of being betrayed by the man who you couldn’t help but be in love with.

You had never admitted it to yourself before, let alone Jake, but you were aching from the feeling that the only man you had ever loved had disregarded you so easily, so effortlessly, so undeniably perfect. People argue that the world will end if fire, and some say ice, but from what you had tasted of desire you held with those who favour fire.

But if you had to perish twice, you thought you knew enough of hate to say that those who favour ice are also great,

and would suffice.

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~

Tags:🏷️ @mishala005 @crazyunsexycool @a-serene-place-to-be @bradshawseresinbabe @dempy @multifandomfangirll @lanie-k @xcastawayherosx @aboutelijahhh @clancycucumber230 @agentrose17 @mizzzpink @phoenix1388 @avaleineandafryingpan @blindedbythelightt @emorychase @potato-girl99981 @jimstreetownsme @xoxabs88xox @pono-pura-vida @whoreforseresin @flames-thebitch @lunamoonbby @jaxawinchester @desert-fern @mallerz @jaxawinchester @marvelshauntedhouse @cowboybarbie @marvelshauntedhouse @babybabygrogu @dakotakazansky

#enterprise // jake seresin #jake seresin x y/n #jake seresin x you #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake x reader #jake seresin #jake seresin x f!reader #jake hangman x y/n #jake seresin imagine #jake seresin fic #jake hangman x reader #jake hangman seresin #jake seresin x reader

79 notes · View notes

crispycreambacon · 2 months

Text

I thought I'd share the sketch of this poster/book cover as well as my initial concepts! You can click the "Read More" button for more in-depth explanations on my design process.

Thhis is all for my latest fanfiction, Snip Snip, so if you'd like to check that out, then...

Now let's crack in!

For the release of "Snip Snip", I actually had several different directions in mind! One was a comic of one of the scenes from the fanfic—specifically the one where the Professor breaks down in front of Kate and Joyce with the line "I don't like being a woman"—and the other was a series of doodles showing the Professor's transition. Unfortunately, both directions met dead ends as I couldn't find the motivation to do either. The most progress I made were these sketches.

If you're wondering, "The first one looks familiar..." that's because I reused that pose for my first promo art! It was too good of a pose. I couldn't waste it :P

But anyways, after a period of getting extremely frustrated over the lack of progress, I realized my main problem: I was biting off more than I could chew. I didn't know this at the time, but I was dealing with burnout from school assignments that made drawing more ambitious ideas like the ones I had very difficult. Hence, I had to scale it down. It made me think, "Why not do something like a movie poster or a book cover?"

That's how the sketches at the top of the post came to be! I consulted a friend of mine over which pose to choose, and he picked the third one which I understand why so. The obscuring of the Professor's face not only made it cool, but it adds symbolism in how we don't really see his true identity—the real him—until his transition. Here's the first sketch!

As you can see, the title is on the top left corner! However, I moved it to the bottom for two reasons

It's advice I learnt while looking up how to make movie posters since moving the title to the bottom tends to bring more focus to the illustration above.

I couldn't find a font that fits! And the idea of doing typography again (especially after the Keep Yourself Safe poster...) was really not what I signed up for.

But then it left the problem of the top corner looking empty. It was too distracting! So what did I fill it in with? The subtitle: This is their story. The composition is now more balanced, and also the subtitle tickles me.

As I said before, I looked up movie posters for this! Special thanks to the Nashville Film Institute and Muse by Clio for their articles that guided me during this poster making process. I will say though I got really sidetracked watching Filmmaker IQ's The History of the Hollywood Movie Poster 😭 It's really interesting, I'd recommend watching it!

One thing I learnt is that movie posters limit their colour palettes. Of course, this is good advice for art in general, but movie posters emphasize on its colour usage to attract the audience with their simple yet bold schemes. It is a piece of advertisement after all! Following their footsteps, I limited my colours to the primary colours (red, yellow, blue) and purple to make the scissors pop and allude to the nonbinary flag colour scheme.

And from there, it was just a matter of experimenting with rendering! I wanted a mix of pop art and storybook illustrations, so I mixed lineart with lineless, and I wanted to retain the energy of the sketch while still polishing it, so I cleaned the sketch, merged it with the colours, and painted on top of it rather than make a separate lineart layer.

Overall, I'm extremly proud of the end result! The struggle of figuring out the promo art for this fic has been tormenting me since the beginning of the year, so I'm glad to bring it to an end. Thank you for reading my ramblings! I hope you learnt something or at least had fun? Either way, have a good day!!

#this truly has been a rambles moment #i really really recommend watching that video by the way it is FASCINATING #the professor #shane madej #puppet history #poster design #art process #design process #art #artists on tumblr #sketches #concept art #chris p fried rambles #chris p fried art

10 notes · View notes

ushioliddell-blog · 2 months

Text

Gonna do it in French, for the sentences part. Be prepared !

more fic writer asks!

reblog & your followers can send asks with the questions they’d like you to answer!

the last sentence you wrote

"Comme s’il n’y avait jamais eu le moindre mensonge, comme s’il s’agissait d’une visite de plus, parmi toutes celles qu’il lui avait fait, comme si rien n’avait changé et qu’il ne portait absolument pas encore il y a peu, un masque immaculé qui reposait encore entre ses mains."

Took the most intereting one. Otherwise, it would have been : "Il ne devait pas…." But these two were the last i wrote recently. Will probably write more this night XD

a character whose POV you’re currently exploring

Q!Aypierre. Again. But i'm in a QSMP fanfiction Arc, so....

how you feel about your current WIP

Proud and frustrated at the same time because i don't progress as mauch as i want XD

a story idea you haven’t written yet

One of the list ? Okay.... "When the time come.. " A what if, where Q!Max was about to break with Q!Aypierre, thinking he doesn't need him really but couldn't because realizing he was not well,thinking he will break with him later when he got better but.....He began to see sides of him he doesn't know and fall XDDDD But i have so many, you have no ideas XDDDD Some ghost fics, some soulamte fics, some more casual......

first sentence of the fifth paragraph of an unpublished WIP

"Mais tout cela allait prendre fin dans quelques minutes, n’est-ce pas ?". Comes from an OS about the ending of Purgatory, from Q!Guill point of view.

the word that appears the most in your current draft (wordcounter.net can tell you)

"De " XD Disappointed of the result i must admit XD

your preferred writing fonts

Times New Roman. Not original XDDDD

if you had to write a sequel to a fic, you’d write one for…

One for a fic i wrote before which was a mix between Alice in Wonderland and D gray Man, based on Alice through the looking glass.

start to finish, how long did it take you to write the last fic you posted?

....... I never finished a fanfiction. XDDDD Not because i don't like them, but i m always full of new ideas and some of them must be written down immediately, otherwise, i will loose the words that came XD

what is the longest amount of time you’ve let a draft rest before you finished it?

Months. Maybe, even years XDDD

a WIP you’d like to finish someday

"Les Marques du soleil. " A fic about how a RPZ character (Lenny Johnson ) obtain each one of his tatoos. A spin off of an other fanfiction about him and Kenneth.

a trope you’re really into right now

The clown who hides what he really think behind his smiles and jokes XD

a fandom you’re thinking about writing for

Red Queen. A prequel with Carmadon and Davidson.

where do you get your inspiration?

Absolutely everything around me. XDDDD Can be looking at something and.... Tada XD

favorite weather for writing

Don't really mind XDDD

favorite place to write

On my bed. XDDDD But i wrote in many places before XD

talk about your writing and editing process

Depends. I write often on the impulse,seeing the scenes before write them, immerge myself in the scenes,until i need to go to sleep, when i m in a writing session. Let the words and sometimes how the characters want to act. Sometimes I have ideas which turn out differently as if the characters guide my hands XDDDD I read myself a lot of time for be sure to make less faults XD Sometimes i write my chapters like Verne did (i learned this technic in a litteracy course : writing chapters by ideas you will use in this chapter ). But i use this when i have a good idea and i m afraid to loose how i want to build my chapter XDDD Sometimes i write the feelings the characters feel, to be able to immerge myself in when i take back the writing XDDDD

if you keep them, share a deleted sentence or paragraph from a published fic

I write mostly on the PC. I may have notes (when i was at university, i wrote on paper and write later on the PC at home) but i m too lazy to go upstairs and search XDDD

the most interesting topic you’ve researched for a fic

Was not for fics, but RP. China in the 19 th century with the occidental world and...... poisons XD

in what year did you publish your first fic ?

It was a song fic and it was published in 2012 XD

when did you publish your most recent fic?

In 2023.

do you ever worry about public reaction to what you’re writing? how do you get past that?

Yeah, but most of the time, i have so few person who like and comment about my works, that what i'm anxious about is, is there people who read about my works or/ and don't they comment because they don't like my works ? XD

pick three keywords that describe your writing

Feelings - Hurt and comfort - Slowburn . (you will not see me on silly ideas without plot ).

how do you recharge when you’re not feeling creative?

I play videos games, or i read. I do other things and don't try to force myself, even if sometimes i feel guilty XD

besides writing, what are your other hobbies?

Reading, playing videos games, diamond painting, paintings by numbers.

are you able to write with other people around?

Yes. but if not too noisy and if nobody talk to me XDDDDDD

your favorite part of the writing process

When letting the words come to me, and let the flow of the story guide me and change what i have in mind before.

your least favorite part of the writing process

When it's the 425857515124141 time i read mylsef again and i still find mistakes XDDDD

how easy is it for you to come up with titles?

Most of the time, easy but sometimes really difficult for me. Always in english, though. Easier for me.

share a fic you’re especially proud of

"Des châteaux dans le sable ". Which i will finish one day. A story about a child and an adult who try to save their souls in a war context, in D Gray Man context. Or "Les Marques du soleil".

#Fic writers Ask game

2 notes · View notes

198d · 1 year

Text

...

So, working on a project and one aspect of it is making a really simple scientific poster. I'm the design guy, I do the front nd design since I'm the only person who knows basic html and css, the only person who has taken art and design classes, and I do this stuff for fun so I go ahead and take charge of the poster. Plus they really just don't have the intuition for design at all, even when I or the professors give clear instructions on How To Do Things Right. We have to make tons of drafts and get feedback on them, and its kind of a dripfeed because staff would make comments on some things, neglect to comment on the other things, and make us turn in another draft based on those missed comments.

Every single fucking time my teammates would work on it, I would have to go back and fix allllllll of the margins and padding they neglected, and I would have to remake every image of a diagram into a simplified, vectorized. Every time we had to change text or images based on the feedback, I would have to go back and change those as well. Today, while I was working on this, one of my teammates was literally trying to edit the same thing at the same time (using figma and diagrams.net). I was going to lose my mind because I was just trying to fix all of the issues, like I had to do multiple times, that my teammates would neglect from the feedback, and so this was actively happening while I was trying to fix them.

I had everything in their own groups, so that it would be easy to change things out. My teammates didn't know how to work with that. Earlier teammate literally did not understand that a file cannot have two different file extensions, and sent me a rasterized image of a diagram instead of the actual editable file, because diagrams.net just lets you have an "editable (so like, able to move around the individual elements) png" saved to your google docs, exported it as a plain png and posted it in the project chat. When I couldn't open it they then tried to tell me like, well it worked for me and well it has the other extension too so it should work. It was only the filename that had the 'extension' of the proper file format. (this is the big csc senior class btw)

The fact that we went back and forth so much on that diagram to begin with was frustrating because they could've given me access to the editable file at any time, and would constantly ignore or forget feedback which meant having to fix it many, many more times, and most of those fixes were still missing the core design feedback like 'make the text size bigger' and 'eliminate unnecessary whitespace'. If anything, it would've been much better if I went through with porting it to figma instead of relying on them, but I'm over here not wanting to be a total control freak so I'm like... whatever.

So when I get access to that diagram I fix issues from all of the feedback, but at the end of our final feedback they go and try to edit at the same fucking time as I am editing, and I had been fixing the diagram all day up to that point. Then the same thing happened on the figma document, and of course they deleted my group for the section the diagram was supposed to go in, so I had to make it again, fix the margins, fix the padding, fix the sizing.

They also completely trashed my design for a page I worked on for the project itself like waay earlier in the semester, so I was like. Okay. You guys do your thing, I can put in all my junk later. I would like to avoid wasting my time as much as possible, considering how mentally ill and exhausted I already am.

oh yeah and also the examples the professors put in the powerpoint for posters had the same (margins and spacing or text inconsistencies, bad looking screenshots, that kind of thing) or worse issues (think black impact font on a busy patterned background, for fucks sake) that they kept nitpicking us for, so its kinda like. please actually showcase something that's relevant thanks.

At least it's finally(?) over.

#born in hearts etched in cold

1 note · View note

katrinawritesthings · 2 years

Text

Hey also!!

yes hello it’s me finally remembering to promote my patreon here on tungle dot net!! i post on the last day of every month and i am also!! making a change to one of my tiers!!

💙 for $2 a month!! this is the one i'm changing lol. originally it was when i had a schedule and was posting four fics every month and on patreon i would post a couple of paragraphs from each one but you just got to see them early which. honestly. was not really worth the $2 lmfao. but then my arms stopped working and i couldn't post as often so i changed it to each month i would post a big excerpt of old wips that i know i'm never going to finish or write more for. things like not royal au and therapy au and tentacle au and piercings au and body swap au and demon au. very interesting if you do not mind getting cockblocked by knowing there's never going to be more of them lol

but my chronic pain has sucked so bad for so long that i literally ran out of shit to post lmfao so

for $2 a month!! new and improved!! i will be posting two polls every month : ) one will be for you to choose which two fics i take from my googledoc and get all set up into a draft post

and the second will be for you to choose which 1 or 2 fics i will post that month!! 1 or 2 depending on whether or not i have any requests done at the time because i always like to post those as soon as possible. more likely than not it's going to be two

i do have like. a lot of fics in my docs and in my drafts and i'm not going to make a poll with like 20 options every month lmfao but there will still be good and varied choices. You can choose multiple options and the top two will be the winners and i'm thinking i'll leave each poll open until it's time to post the first thing of the month

The first poll will open on September 30th and will be to choose what gets posted in October :-)

💙 for $3 a month you get the polls and wips of everything i've worked on that month. not really much to explain for this one lmao i just take between like 3-8 paragraphs of whatever things i've written that month and edit them and post them. usually it's like 4 or 5 different fics?? sometimes i go absolutely buckwild and write more

💙 for $4 a month you get the polls and the wips and also sfw and nsfw aus like you know. au where they're mermaids or whatever. but more elaborate lmfao. i write at 10-point font and for the sfw things i usually aim for 3 pages and for the nsfw things 2 pages. and sometimes i get really invested in one au in particular so i usually split those into parts and add them onto the normal amount

a lot of them are completely new stuff that i haven't written and sometimes i turn them into actual fics that get posted here eventually. there are some definite bangers like single dads au and mafia au and fallen angel au and final fantasy 10 au. others are like extra things that i've thought about for fics i've already posted like fairy pet au and biker au. currently i'm working on multiple parts for final fantasy xiii au and taekey we got married au. very fun

💙 the reason i started my patreon in the first place was so i could save up monie to go to brain therapy and then physical therapy and so far it has paid for that and i have been able to save up for future appointments whenever the plague ends and because of that i've been able to keep writing fics for fun and me time without getting turbo anxious about it so even if you just show up for one month and speedread four years all at once and then dip i will still appreciate you giving me your monie : )

#patreon tag

2 notes · View notes

countthelions · 9 months

Note

✄ what’s your editing process?

✦ what was your easiest fic to write & your hardest?

I am 👀👀👀

Editing process

Ooh gosh trying to word this in a way that makes sense. Well!! A lot of my editing comes from being a rp writer for a longer period than a story writer. I tend to write little chunks, then edit the chunk whenever I get trapped somewhere before continuing on. (It could actually be a fun process to record some day hmm) I am a little jealous of folks who can just bang out whole /chunks/ of stuff without stopping. Cannot be me unfortunately.

But at the end I will go through each section, which I've usually broken up in my head by "beats" (to use the acting term) - shifts of action/tone/etc and make sure they all flow correctly. I am not opposed to rewriting whole sections to capture the feeling I'm really aiming for, which,,, is why my long fics are really taking me quite a while to write. I think the second chapter of champion au has been rewritten at least six times by this point. When I do those rewrites, I'll change the whole section's font to a different color and literally rewrite it fresh. (Another reason why recording a writing section could be fun!!) The colored "old" section gets thrown into my extras at the bottom of the doc to usually just save ;; I dont want to delete them entirely hah! I also love just flipping sentences around. Sometimes that little shuffle is all it takes to make something click. This section - from colored text to this sentence for example - was at the bottom of the answer and got moved up!

This fine tooth combing I recognize is excessive - and man tumblr deleted what this paragraph used to be so I guess we're ending it here >:( but yeah, i recognize my editing is a bit too focused in on little details but given how important flow of paragraphs are to me as a mmm physical feeling you read to (how theatre of me hm?), I don't mind the work if it makes the whole thing stronger.

Easiest fic & Hardest fic

Easiest: honestly, anything that started as a ramble to my serverwerver friends was easy. They're my favorite of audiences, endlessly supportive and I love listening to them as well ;; One of my favorite memories of doing dragon au rambles is a moment where Grillby tries getting Gaster's attention and failing to do so, and all three of my friends put a sad emoji react on the end of that chunk. Twas very nice ;; I think if I had to pick one though? It'd be [nightmare cures], barely edited from ramble to posted - everything from the tattoos to the song came with hardly any thought. I needed some specific comfort and wrote myself the perfect thing

Hardest: a toss up between [Handspun Nerves] and [Till the Magnolias Bloom]. I'm not counting champion au bc it's not even POSTED BUT MAN IT CERTAINLY GETS ME!! Hand spun because I really couldn't bring myself to hurt Grillby and all my friends kept encouraging me to hurt him more, because that's what the hurt is /for/ in a hurt/comfort fic!! Magnolias gained it's title before I was even done with it hah!! I really really really wanted to write just the end, of Grillby waking up suddenly more well rested than he'd been in days, seeing Gaster snore across from him equally as rested - and my brain said: yeah but /why/ are they well rested? So I struggled Very Much with putting to words why they were finally relieved at being well rested and hopefully!! Succeeded. It could be a fic I rewrite some day actually...

#thank you dear <3 #pls enjoy the Lots of words oops #fic writer ask meme

1 note · View note

tyunni · 2 years

Note

omg advice on having a good theme i beg!!

AHHHHHHHHHDHSHDHS THIS IS SUCH A SWEET ASK STOP 😭😭 first of all im extremely thankful and flattered that you would come to ME for theme advice ☹️

I HOPE this post is helpful in some way, i'm trash at giving advice 🥲 keep in mind that this is all from my experience and this is all my opinion 🙌🙌

Honestly i dont have much to say. What i keep in mind for my themes is that i have to follow a certain style or a vibe. Like for example my current theme (and the themes i've had for the past.. idk how long) looks like a video game! Usually the ideas pop up in my head themselves, but there are times when i look for inspo on pinterest or simply search stuff up on google. Do not be afraid to look for inspiration and don't feel discouraged when your theme doesn't turn out the way you initially thought it would.

I also usually find it easier to focus on one part of my theme and put the most effort into it. Most of the time the most detailed parts of my themes are my pinned posts/navigations. Specifically, the parts where i introduce myself! Therefore, my thought process usually goes like this:

Choose a certain vibe (video game, magazine, diary, etc.)

Think of a way i could write a short about me in a way that would fit the style i'm going for.

This step is optional, sort of 😭 but if nothing pops up in my head i just search up "*insert something* character introduction/info". Like "video game character introduction" "diary character info". Having a visual example is always good. You don't have to necessarily copy it, but looking at different variations and piecing them together in your head definitely helps! That way you can come up with your own idea while using certain parts of certain images you found.

EDIT EDIT AND EDIT!!!

Personally for me, it takes extremely long to get something to look decent. I switch through different apps and ideas. Sometimes i take days to find what i like, and most of the time it looks completely different from how i wanted it to. Just know that you should take as many breaks as you'd like, take a few days if you want to! Looking at something with fresh eyes helps you see the "flaws" you couldn't see when you were frustrated and/or tired. Also helps you get new ideas as well, or interpret the idea you initially had in a completely different way! Delete everything and start from scratch if you want to. Experiment. Please just experiment, trust me. AND AND AND WATCH A LOT OF TUTORIALS !!! YDK THE AMOUNT OF STUFF U CAN DO WITH UR EDITING APP. ESP IBIS PAINT X. OH MY GOD.

The apps that i use are: ibis paint x (this is my main one frrr), picsart, canva, polarr. Also use the website ezgif to make the gifs, if i have to ofc! Trust, that website is a life saver if you don't have Photoshop (dw im broke too HELPP 😭😭)

I sometimes use capcut as well, then convert the video from mp4 to gif with the ezgif website. Literally promoting that website like my life depends on it, sponsor me :////// slash jay

Also, if you find pictures but want to adjust the colors, use polarr. Absolutely one of my top 3 editing apps, it has helped me a lot!

I've also seen a lot of people put far more effort into their headers instead of navigations, their themes look absolutely stunning as well! Some don't even have headers!

I think it's important to have that balance: having some simple parts and some detailed parts. I keep that in mind for my overall theme and also for the navigations as well. If you put a lot of detail into the header and the navi/pfp/whatever, it just becomes too much.

If you put a lot of detail into your about me part of the navi (if you are even planning to make an about me part), then you should keep the links more simple! If you're putting more details into the links and the way they're placed, the symbols and fonts you use, etc. then keep the about me + pics less complicated!

Themes don't have to be complicated for them to look good, you don't even have to use pictures in the pinned if you don't want to! You can just keep everything short and sweet. Sometimes simple themes are the best ones, if done well.

Also quick tip: I don't recommend using crazy fonts, it becomes harder to read if you overuse them.

#AAHHHHHH I TRIED IM SORRY IF THIS SUCKS HELP #‼️.may answers #‼️.anon

1 note · View note

korgbelmont · 3 years

Text

Choices Insiders December 2021

Here we are, the final month of 2021, and the final Insiders of the year.

RAMBLE ALERT!!

I selected that I don't read on my phone, when it comes to reading it will either be on the computer because of the bigger screen or a proper book in hand.

It's a bittersweet ending to a beloved series. Last month, we said farewell to The Royal Romance series with a Choices livestream. If you missed out, don’t fret! We’ve got the recorded video for you. Haven't played? Find your happily ever after in The Royal Romance, The Royal Heir, and The Royal Finale, available for all!

Although I stopped with The Royal Heir 2, it does feel a little bit weird now that this long series is done.

There's a whole new world of passion to explore. Push your boundaries with our newest VIP Early Access book, Surrender! Available now for all VIP players.

So from what I've seen from people's post, Surrender really isn't great and has a very negative representation of BDSM. So I think I will give this one a miss when it becomes public.

Behind the Scenes

As we move closer to the release of Crimes of Passion 📷, we asked our writers if they have any advice for our players who will be venturing into our newest mystery book: “Advice? Pay attention. You never know when a small detail might be relevant later, even if it seems irrelevant at the time.” Get those notepads ready, because it sounds like this book will keep us on our toes! Stay tuned to our social media pages for more on Crimes of Passion.

As I mentioned in a previous post, this is the one that annoys me the most about the new release method because it is the book that is at the top of my list that isn't a sequel.

It looks like that similar to Veil of Secrets and The Unexpected Heiress, this may have the magnifying glass mechanic to signal clues.

This is all looking rather high tech and I think that one of the leads will be in law enforcement.

Top FAQ

1. When are The Nanny Affair 2 and Laws of Attraction 2 releasing? Both sequels are early in production and do not have a release timeline as of yet. We will be sure to update the Community when we have more info to share. 3. When is Wake the Dead releasing for all players? This month! Stay tuned for the finalized release date.

I am selecting these two questions in particular as I will be going into detail about the second one in a bit.

I'm not sure if Laws 2 and The Nanny Affair 3 were planned from the get go, but by the sounds of this, it doesn't seem like it. I don't know what to expect from either except that Laws 2 will probably be about getting rid of Martin after the revelation at the end of BK1. And for The Nanny Affair 3, more than likely, part of it will centre around the wedding and then the other part around the Addison revelation (they'll need a hell of an explanation as to how she is alive).

So there is quite a bit to talk about here.

I'm actually going to leave Crimes because I want to do a post about that on it's own. I was planning to yesterday, but then decided not to as I remembered the Insiders was today. But I do like the font of the title.

It looks like January will not have a VIP release, guessing they want to have some things ready for the rest of the year and may be taking January to get themselves sorted.

Untamable - I have no idea what to expect from this. If I had to make a guess, I would say maybe it's something to do with animals. But I couldn't say more than that.

Princess Swap - Certainly an interesting title, again, no clue what to expect. And I couldn't even take a guess at a premise.

Cursed Heart - Going by the choice of background, this looks like it could be a fantasy setting possibly. I am guessing that magic is involved with it in some way, but how it is, no clue.

With Wake the Dead coming this month, it's certainly a different type of story for a December release haha. I'm not sure who I will choose between Shannon and Angel, I'll need to play to make my mind up.

Ms. Match is coming in the new year, so it'll be time to choose a version of Jaqueline soon. From what I've seen, people have enjoyed this book. I'll give it a go, more often than not, I'll give a book a go with at least two to three chapters before coming to a decision.

Noticing Slow Burn isn't there this month, maybe they've pushed it back, not sure.

While we wait in anticipation to reveal more details about our 2022 books, we’d like to announce some updates: Ms. Match will be available for all players in January 2022. As for Blades of Light and Shadow, we've seen your comments and understand your concerns, so we want to reassure you that Blades will be receiving a sequel. If you've played Blades, you know how elaborate the art, music, writing, playstyle, everything is. As a result, it requires a lot of attention to detail to make. Our teams want to make sure that we deliver this epic story with the highest quality as we know Blades 2 is a highly anticipated Choices book sequel. As a result, Blades will need more time in production and will not be released in 2022 as previously stated. Thank you for waiting as we work to make this story the best that it can be!

As I have mentioned, it's highly doubtful that they would cancel Blades with how well it did. BK1 took ages to make, so it's not a surprise that it's the same for BK2, even if it was planned from the beginning. There was a lot that had to be done from scratch such as the assets, backgrounds, and soundtracks. Plus all the art scenes.

That's it for this month, it's definitely been an interesting year. Hope for the best in 2022.

My best to you all and keep safe!

#playchoices #choices stories you play #choices insiders #thoughts and theories

7 notes · View notes

sparklinpixiedust · 3 years

Text

Basic Training

This post has been sitting in my drafts for months now, during which I've come up with a few ways I wanted to write this post. This is what I've come up with.

Basic Training is the episode which made me hate Ben the most. The whole episode consisted him of being a stuck up brat only to be rewarded for it in the end.

This episode was the perfect opportunity to have Kevin in the spotlight and show how skilled and smart he is.

Gwen's presence in this episode was actually fine, there's no change needed for that.

Look, I know the shows named Ben 10 but we have seen Ben be the hero tons of times already.

And Ben being egoistic about his heroism is not something new in the franchise.

There have been episodes on the OS where Ben got a big head, yet I dont ever see anyone complaining about that.

Was is it because he was 10 that we excuse this behaviour? Nope.

15 - 16 is still pretty young and his attitude can be excused at this age as well.

My opinion? It was handled better in the OS.

There were times when Ben wasn't always the main focus.

In Lucky Girl, Ben has his ' who's your hero?' Moment.

They showed Gwen feeling jealous and hurt by the fact she wasn't noticed much.

It was realistic.

Then the epsiode proceeded to focus on Gwen , having Ben being kind of like a sub plot to the story.

Towards the end Ben compliments her.

So yeah Ben got big head, but at the same time they shifted focus so that the audience wouldn't find it annoying.

Gwen was in the spotlight for a bit, giving people a break from Ben.

Secondly , in Be Afraid Of The Dark, Ben again is shown to be slightly stuck up, but towards the end of that episode he learns and acknowledges Gwen and Grandpa for help and understands his crime fighting is more of a team effort.

In Galactic Enforcers, we are shown there are other heros besides Ben as well.

Ben wasn't the sole focus of that episode. Yes it was about him but also about the Galactic Enforcers.

I don't think he was shown to be over confident here , but it was nice to see some other heros in the scene.

The Ben 10,000 episode focuses on how Ben was too focused on his job and the lesson at that was Ben needed to relax and have them Galactic Enforcers take the lead instead.

Again , his attitude towards everything was brought in focus but towards the end he learnt something.

I recently started watching Generator Rex and I can't help but compare Rex's character to Ben's.

Rex is also proud , rushes into things and considers himself to be a hotshot. But they also show him being down ,having trouble with his nanites and actually voice out his insecurities.

He's still the hero, still has things go his way most times but it's not annoying like Ben.

( I've only seen like 7 episodes so far so I don't know if this going to go down hil or not but so far so good)

The issue with the sequels after the OS was that Ben was the focus a bit too much.

We as the audience were rarely ever given a break from him.

Other than a few conversations here and there about his attitude, nothing really was done about it.

Gwen should've been appreciated more for saving Kevin and Kevin should've been appreciated for stopping Aggregor.

But they weren't.

If it had been Ben , they would've made sure to show him getting some sort of recognition or trophy.

Back to the Basic Training episode.

We know he's the legendary Ben Tennyson, we know he's a hero. We didn't need another episode on it.

Instead the plot should've focused on Kevin. His skills, his abilities.

Ben would act the same but Magsiter Hulka should've put some sort of cover so Ben couldn't use the omnitrix.

Ben goes on breaking rules, and having a hard time being a hero without the watch.

Towards the end, it should've been Kevin who cracks the case and saves Hulka. Ben is mad he can't use the omnitrix but instead uses the guns and other weapons he's learnt to use at the academy

He's not amazing at them , but it makes him realise that he is hero , watch or not, something that has been emphasised in the show. Its not impossible for him to function without the watch.

Towards the end, Ben getting a 95 was a stretch. I'm sorry , but the guy wasn't great with using weapons and without the watch I dont think he would've been able to complete that hostage excercise.

I'm thinking more like 89%.

Gwen gets 98, that's fine and Kevin gets a 100.

Hulka comes in and awards the medal (?) to Kevin, suggesting he's becoming more like his father.

( im ignoring the ret con, plus the retcon I'm assuming wasnt thought off at this point by the writers)

Ben is shown to take one of the guns back to earth, because he thinks they're cool and he wants to practice and get better at them.

The whole hostage situation makes him want to get better at making strategies.

Yes he's good at improv, but he needs to learn to properly plan as well.

It doesn't matter if he's never shown to use the gun ever again, and he's back to relying on the omnitrix.

Or maybe some time down the line, he could use the weapon, even if it for a second, to show that he is improving and getting better.

Before you say 'he's already a hero, he doesn't need to learn anything ' sorry but no.

He's 16. He may have saved the world but he still has growing up to do. Different battles are going to arise all the time.

Saying he is perfect at 16 is dumb. Saying he's perfect when he's ben 10k , it'll make some sense. He's been around for a while and is pretty experienced.

The watch is a part of him, but seeing him try to explore other options would've been a fresher idea.

Another scene that made me mad was the court (?) scene in Vreedle, Vreedle.

Ben being a hero shouldn't make him above the law.

Domstol ruling in favor of Ben just because he's the legendry Ben Tennyson was stupid.

After Ben's little monologue , and destroying Domstols desk, the judge should've just informed him that being a hero does not excuse him from following the law.

Kevin could've had his little moment doing some negotiation ( would've been nice to see how he works as con artist) and Ben could've jumped in and helped while making some good points for the argument, showing us he's not stupid.

Then having Domstol rule in their favor would've made sense.

On the way back to earth there could've been a joke about how Ben watches Judge Judy too much which is where he learnt about trials and stuff. Or maybe Gwens dad taught him a thing or two at some point.

All this doesn't mess with Ben's character all that much, he's still the hero of the show, he still has his ego but it makes him more likeable, shifts focus from his attitude, and shows us he's pretty smart and is growing into a good hero.

Ben's not a bad guy. I mean he is the hero of the show. There are tons of scenes which show he's good , like the whole sacrificing thing so the ultimates could live and all.

But little scenes here and there tend to be enough for someone , especially for someone who isn't a super hard-core Ben lover to form negative opinions on him.

Although calling him a psychopath / narc is out of line because I don't find him to be like that. His attitude was magnified by him being in the spotlight too much and writers not having a good balance in writing situations.

Ben being the main character of the show is at risk of becoming hated or less appreciated just because he's the font runner of the show.

Admit it, side characters tend to get more love most times than the main agonist of shows.

I've been watching videos on YouTube on this topic as to why this happens , and what I've come up with is that writers of shows tend to focus too much on main character. Things seem to go their way most times and this tends to get on peoples nerves, consciously or subconsciously because it's not exactly realistic.

Having shows where everything focuses on one person most times tend to backfire.

I don't mind Ben having a big head, I dont mind him making jokes and being so casual.

It's his defense mechanism to protect himself from drowning into the struggles and pressures of being a hero. But always having him be that way isn't good.

The writers should've executed it properly.

( okay this post got really long, more than I thought it would. If you're read the whole things , congratulations on making it here lol.

I'm not going to stop anyone from replying to this because everyone has different opinions and we all have the freedom to express them.

Although I believe I've made my point and I've made sure to keep in mind all the arguments about why bashing Ben is wrong when he's not a bad guy while typing this out.

I don't think I've directed any major hate towards him , its mostly towards the writers for making the situations like that,but if you think I have you can reply to it.

I'm not gonna reply back though , because again I feel I've made my point.

Any agreements / disagreements you have with the post feel free to share because it is your right.

Any disagreements you have with other members, as long as its related to the post you can share it.

Any issues you have personally with other members, please keep them to your selves.

I will not tolerate bullying , harassing, name calling and petty arguments on my post and blog page.

If this happens I will simply delete this post and re-upload it.)

#ben 10 au #ben 10 #kevin levin #ben 10 alien force #ben tennyson #ben 10 reboot #ben 10 omniverse #ben 10 analysis #ben 10 series #ben 10 critical #ben 10 classic #my take

59 notes · View notes

aspire-to-the-light · 4 years

Text

I really do not normally like this blog, but this post is a solid:

https://slatestarcodex.com/2020/03/06/socratic-grilling/

And what I'd add to it is that often, as an autistic person, if I'm trying to understand you it will sound like I'm arguing with you. It will sound like I'm picking a fight with you, and I'm not.

A silly, toy example in which we are building a blanket fort:

A: "We should tip the sofa over on its edge here, and put this chair over here."

B: "Surely we should put this chair here, closer to the sofa? Otherwise the blanket isn't big enough to stretch between them, so we won't have a ceiling."

A: "Oh, we have a much bigger blanket."

B: "We do?"

A: "Yeah, it's in the cupboard under the stairs if you want to go grab it. It might actually be great to bring it over so we can check it all fits!"

The thing that's happening here is that B didn't know what question to ask to make the world make sense, so they had to explain what their understanding of the world was so that A could point out where theirs differed.

We're often told not to argue back, that it's rude, that asking questions is more polite. But B couldn't have asked a question when they didn't know what information they were missing. All B knew was that A seemed to think this was a good plan, and that didn't match with their understanding of the resources available. Only after A mentioned the existence of the bigger blanket could B have hit on the right question to ask: "Oh, are we planning on using the bigger blanket for this? Where's that stored, again?"

And this happens all the time when people are trying to explain neurotypical minds to me. I often end up explaining how my own mind works, hoping they can pinpoint where theirs is different, but it's interpreted as a challenge.

You might tell me I need to change something about how I behave or talk, and I'm often happy to do it, but without a good model of neurotypical minds I'm left thinking, "huh, I'm being told to be more concise, but I don't like it when others are concise; I often feel like they're leaving out information, explaining things insufficiently or using a text size that is too damn small. This doesn't make sense, so others' minds must be different to mine in some relevant way, but how? Do they have better eyes to read smaller fonts, are they more comfortable with missing out on information, or perhaps they prefer looking up their own explanations? Without understanding that, I can't tell how to execute on this being-more-concise thing - whether I should use more jargon and do less explaining, or make my margins thinner."

So what I say is something like, "So here's why I don't like reading concise text..." and it sounds like I'm arguing why I shouldn't become more concise after all. I'm not (always). I'm laying my cards on the table: here's my understanding of how brains work, based on my own brain, and I'd like you to tell me exactly where your understanding differs from mine. Then I can make my mental model better.

This seems like a distinctly autistic thing that lots of us do, and I've never heard an allistic person express struggling with it in these terms. So here's my cards on the table, I guess: what's up with that? How do allistics manage to extract information, when stating your own opinion could be taken as arguing, but you don't know what question to ask until you know which bit of the world you're confused about? Which bit of my model of this problem is an issue you find you can get around?

32 notes · View notes

pendragonfics · 5 years

Text

a strange fear gripped me (and i just couldn't ask)

- ̗̀ Bruce Banner Bingo 2019 ̖́-

Paring: Bruce Banner/Reader

Square filled: wedding day

Tags: female reader, post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Happy Hogan is a Good Bro, Uncle Happy Hogan, Professor Hulk, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Beauty and the Beast Elements, Post-Canon Fix-It

Summary: At the Stark house by the lake, Morgan organises an event for her toys, inviting you and Bruce Banner along.

Word Count: 2,419

Current Date: 2019-08-14

Work Text:

As per the invitation - handwritten, with the best penmanship that her gel pen could muster - you arrived at the back porch of Pepper’s house, wearing your nice outfit. You had been tempted to just turn up in normal clothes, but she’d have said over the phone in her most grown-up voice, that “weddings were for fancy clothes!”

The fanciest thing you had on hand was a black pair of slacks and a white top. You wondered if she minded if you were in the same colour as the bride, but then again, if she was being that strict, you’d be chastised for wearing pants. When you get to the house, Happy is sat on the front porch, in his usual suit. The only thing different is he’s wearing a handmade flower crown, the circlet slightly askew upon his balding head. He checks his phone, but as you near, he gives you a wry smile.

“Welcome to the wedding,” he says. His tone is dry as ever, but the fact that he’s playing along reminds you of all the years he humoured Tony with every finicky detail. “Invitation?”

You pass him the paper and notice he has another invitation beside his feet.

“Morgan roped in another person to play marriage with?” You ask.

Happy’s smile is wry. “That sounds about right.” He laughs. “But I’m under strict instruction not to disclose the guest list.”

You roll your eyes. “It seems like we’re equally wrapped around the kid’s finger.” You smile, noticing a trail of coloured in paper confetti. “I suppose that’s the way to the event?”

“Yep,” Happy pops the p. He gives you another smile and returns his gaze to the screen in his hands. “Enjoy.”

Stepping around him, you follow the litter of crayon on torn printer paper to mimic rose petals, to the rear of the house. You’d only been to the Stark house three times; when you came to check on Tony post-snap, and pre-Morgan, for her third birthday party, and … Tony’s funeral. If it weren’t for the fact that you’d promised to Pepper to be around more, for Morgan’s sake, you’d have a hard time being on the property.

Out the back has had a little girl makeover. It doesn’t matter that she’s the kid of a billionaire and the CEO of Stark Industries, there are sheets hanging from the rafters to mimic a tent, cushions sourced from the lounge room all over the garden path, and toys on the grass in a mock arrangement.

Hell, this almost looked like it was a proper wedding.

On the lawn was a pumpkin patch doll, one of those plastic robot dogs from the early 2000’s, a handful of Ken and Barbie dolls - it almost made you wonder which of the toys were getting hitched.

“Aunt __________!” Morgan cried out, running from inside the house. She almost tripped over the threshold, but incorporating her stumble into her step, you soon had a kid torpedoing into your torso for a tight hug.

“Hey, kiddo,” you muss her hair. “What’s crackalacking?”

“You’re so weird,” she chortles. “But you’re here now! We can make it happen!”

You peel off Pepper’s daughter from your form. “I hope I haven’t made you wait too long M. Traffic was horrendous.”

She laughs again. It’s nice to hear her laugh, even though it’s been less than a year since her dad passed away. “No, we haven’t waited long! But now you’re here we can have some fun!”

You watch as she runs as quickly as she came back into the house, and obscured by the security tint window, you stay where you stand, unsure what’s happening next. A beat passes, and you glance down to a Ken doll, naked except for a pair of pink board shorts. You’re sure you had the same doll as a kid yourself. But Morgan is quick in her movements, because not a minute later, you hear gentle protesting, and see...

Oh.

It had most certainly been a hot minute since you last saw Dr Bruce Banner.

Last time you saw him, it had been in Sokovia. The last time you were an actively serving Avenger. You’d broken it off with him because you knew what he and Tony were doing with the Ultron software was reckless, and after the fight against the bots, he flew off into the sun. You vaguely remember him when you materialised for the battle against Thanos, and he looked just like this.

“You’re looking a little green, doc,” you look over his body, unsure what you’re seeing. He was both Hulk...and Banner? To be honest, he looked like a DeviantArt fan nightmare, except there was a hint of sexiness that made you question your taste and life choices. “Morgan, what -,”

“Morgan, sweetie, why is _________ here?” Green Bruce said at the same time.

“For the wedding! And now you’re both here, don’t forget to have a good time.” She says, beaming.

You quietly take a perch on one of the three lawn chairs on the right. Bruce takes the other two.

As Morgan fussed over some dolls that had fallen over, you turn to Bruce, “Want to explain to me why you’re all spinach, no puff?” You whisper.

“I’m, er, - they call me Professor Hulk.” He replies. Even though he’s built like that, his voice is still hesitant. “My physical state is an equilibrium of all parts of my psyche.”

He sounds like Bruce, and smiles like Bruce, but...he doesn’t look like Bruce at all.

You scoff quietly. “I don’t know if you’re taking constructive criticism, but -,”

The music starts up. In her small hands, Morgan holds an Iron Man helmet, a mark you recognise from one of Tony’s earlier designs. From the open mouth, it plays a wedding march, and she approaches the both of you. It would look comical, but she held it like a motorcycle helmet, beside her overalls-clad side.

“Hey, stand up!” She stage-whispers, and you and Green - no - Professor Hulk follow her instruction. Ushering you both around, she places the helmet on a chair and picks up the cabbage patch doll from the ground.

It’s only when she starts reciting some words - familiar because you’ve been to a fair few ceremonies over the years - that you realise what’s happening.

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to make Aunt _________ and Uncle Bruce get married-,”

Professor Hulk’s eyes are wide. “Woah, woah, Morgan -- you can’t marry people.” He says, hands raised as if to placate the eight-year-old before you. “I - we didn’t agree to be married.”

“But it’s a wedding!” Morgan reasons. “You’re here to married.”

“Do you have a license?” You ask, bewildered.

From the pocket of her overalls, she withdraws a printed A4 sheet. “Yeah!” She passes it to you. It’s from a kid’s website, printed in pink ink that reads, in Comic Sans font, Morgan Stark is a cool girl and a cooler marriage officiant! beside the coolgirlgames dot com smiley face logo. You show the sheet to Professor Hulk, and slowly, he wipes a hand over his face. “Don’t you like it?”

“It’s a - a cool license, but Morgan, _________ and I didn’t agree to be married.”

She looks almost like she’s about to cry.

You take the silence as an opportunity to speak up. Lowering yourself to your knees, you gather Morgan in for a hug, holding her close. “Uncle Bruce is right, sweetheart. I - we might have felt the same feelings that people who get married do — but that was a long time ago, and we both changed.”

Morgan sniffs, wiping at her eyes. “But Mommy said that true love lasts forever.”

“You wanted to get married?” Professor Hulk asks you, bewildered.

You glance over your shoulder, taking him in. He looks like Hulk’s nerdy cousin, and if it weren’t for the fact that Bruce’s eyes were looking out from that face, you wouldn’t be able to recognise him.

“I would have said yes if you asked,” you mumble. “… but you never did. And then there was the whole Ultron thing, and next thing I know you’re AWOL, and -,” you feel tears pricking at your eyes. You blink them away, determined not to cry. “But like I said. People change.”

The door opens again, and Pepper Potts steps out. She’s always been a strong woman, and even in her own home, she’s wearing an LBD and heels, her crisp strawberry blonde hair ironed to perfection. All of this you notice in a fraction of a second, because her façade is broken when she sees her daughter, crying in your arms.

“Oh my goodness Morgan, you-,” she takes the scene in, dismounting the porch toward her daughter. Pepper’s heels wobble on the path, and Morgan flies into her arms. “I thought this was for your toys, I said -,”

“But they love each other,” Morgan pleads, sniffing.

Pepper leads her daughter inside, perhaps to give her a stern talking-to. You wondered briefly if you had made the incident worse, but those thoughts were dashed as soon as you felt a hand upon your shoulder. Looking up, you take him in. At this angle, you feel as if you’re Morgan; Professor Hulk towers taller than the average adult, taller than the lofty Pepper Potts. Looking at him, you feel dwarfed, like a deer in the headlights. Bruce should know better than to be a fusion of Hulk around you; you had such a good relationship with the green guy, and you missed him.

“Don’t look at me like that,” you plead, shrugging off his hand.

“You wanted to marry me?” Bruce’s voice crackles.

But you don’t answer him. It’s hard to, because your mind is racing, and your blood is running so fast that you can hear it in your ears, rushing around. You go to leave, but once again, Professor Hulk’s hand holds you back.

“Let me go.”

“_________-,”

“You don’t get to turn up and act like it’s okay to resume where we left off!” you raise your voice, wrenching your arm from his grip. But it’s tight, with all the strength that you remember the Hulk having. “You don’t get to just say that and act like you’re still in a relationship. Because I spent years searching for you. I did not stop. Do you know how fucking hard it was, feeling like a failure? And when I hung my boots up, you’re back on Earth, just to fight Thanos and muck around with your - your biology when that fails.”

If you were a cartoon, you’re sure that your ears would be smoking.

He lets go of your arm. You turn, pacing like a wild beast.

“I wasn’t sure how to say those things,” Professor Hulk whispers, “that you loved-,”

“I still love you, you idiot!” you yell.

You hear a silence fall across the lake house. From inside, where you’re sure that Pepper is trying to console her daughter, and Happy has perhaps moved out of earshot. The forest is silent, the wind dropping off. There’s no birdsong. There’s just the words that came from your mouth, echoing in both of your ears.

I still love you, you idiot!

You wipe a hand over your forehead, shocked that those words came out. Pinching at the bridge of your nose, you compose yourself, readying yourself to face Professor Hulk, and what he has to say to your outburst. But there’s a small part of yourself holding back. That can’t do it. Because that part is the lovestruck little person, the voice that made you search all of space and time and everything in between for the man you lost following Sokovia.

“_________,” he whispers.

“I - I’ve got to go,” you shake your head. But there isn’t a bone in your body that wants to move. You don’t move an inch, can’t move an inch, aren’t sure you ever will move an inch. “Bruce -,”

He gathers you in his arms.

It’s then you melt. You fold into his arms like a spool of cotton candy into a puddle, and he scoops you in, holding you tight. His smell is confusing, and yet, it’s the comfort of Hulk’s arms around you with Bruce’s temperament that feels like…home.

You look up; his neck craned toward yours, hesitant.

And almost like there hasn’t been any time lost between you both, you give in. Upon the balls of your feet, you reach up as far as you can, and, as soft as ever, your lips brush his cheek.

The strangest thing is, you don’t believe in miracles, or true love. That was just a story. You’d trained alongside Sam Wilson in the military, and with every gruelling day of work, there was no silver lining. Especially when Riley died. There was only the next day, and the day after that, and after the funeral, you filed for release from service.

It was a fluke that you were at Sam’s meeting the same day that the Captain America swung by. It happened to be a coincidence that you and Sam were able to help him, and Ms Romanov, with the HYDRA infestation within their government agency. It was chance that you and Sam were enlisted into the Avengers Initiative. It had been the best luck that you met Bruce Banner while training Upstate…and the worst luck that soon after, he disappeared into space.

And right now, before you, there was another sort of miracle, a moment that any other person in their life wouldn’t believe to be happening.

As Professor Hulk stood before you, there was a quirk, just like when you first encountered Hulk in his de-Hulking stage. You’re not sure how it happened, but with a ripple of skin, the shifting of his skeleton, and crackling of bone, Professor Hulk was getting smaller, less green, and more -

“I - What happened to me?” he says.

You can’t believe your eyes. Because just where Professor Hulk, a mix of both Bruce Banner and the gamma radiated creature within, was just standing, is now Bruce. Just Bruce. His clothes are too big, and his glasses too, and swimming in his clothes, he looks to you, unsure of what just happened.

“I’m sorry?” you supplement.

Morgan bursts out from the house, her once-teary face transformed into something of pure joy. “You’re Uncle Bruce again!” she cries out, jubilant. “It worked! It worked!”

You blink. “Oh, honey - Morgan, this was a coincidence, not -,”

“It was true love’s kiss!”

#bruce banner #bruce banner x reader #bruce banner/reader #bruce x reader #Bruce Banner bingo 2019 #bruce banner bingo 19 #hulk #hulk x reader #Avengers #avengers x reader #marvel fanfic #marvel x reader #professor hulk x reader #professor hulk/reader #chaotic--lovely #pendragonfics #Female reader

107 notes · View notes

kyluxtrashpit · 6 years

Note

For the writing game, I couldn't decide which, all the colors please? They're so interesting!

Omg I was so excited when I saw this! You’re so sweet to enable my rambling

Red: What type of writer’s block do you experience the most?

I guess the most common one is I get stuck in transitions. Like I know how this scene goes and I know how the next scene goes, but I don’t know exactly how to get from A to B and it’s one of those cases where I can’t just put a line and jump to it. Scene transitions are one of the hardest things for me for some reason. The second most common for me is probably when my brain is being a shit and won’t let me be productive due to some sort of emotional crisis lmao

White: Are you a supporter/lover of fanfiction?

I mean, kind of obvious lmao, but absolutely. I think it’s great that there are people who are creating things solely out of love for something, and that’s really what fanfiction is, at it’s deepest core. It’s a community of people being so enthusiastic about and loving something so hard that they work their asses of and dedicate time to just… making more of it. For no real external benefit other than some social validation, if they’re lucky. Love and passion are the true motivators and idk that’s just really beautiful to me

Black: Would you want to live in one of the fictional worlds you’vecreated?

I don’t really do a lot of worldbuilding because I find it incredibly boring and I’m terrible at it lmao, but since I always write either canon-verse or modern au, I’m going to treat this as ‘do I want to live in the Star Wars universe?’. And the answer to that would honestly be no. As much as there’s cool stuff, like advanced technology and aliens and maybe I’d be lucky enough to be able to move shit with my mind, there’s also a lot of bad things. A lot of fascism, a lot of wars, and every once in a while some asshole builds a planet-destroying superweapon and blows up a planet (or 5) and like… I could live on one of those, you know

That said, if I didn’t die because the planet I was living on exploded, I would probably survive alright. I mean, my background is in science, so tbh I might have better opportunities there than I do here. While that could mean making chemical weapons or something if the Empire was in power, that’s at least more interesting than customer service at a chemical company lmao. I still wouldn’t choose to live there, but I think I’d manage okay if I had to

[More beneath the cut - my sincerest apologies to those on mobile]

Blue: What’s more important to you: characters or plot?

I mean, they both definitely matter, but if I have to choose? Interesting characters can save a dry plot, but the best plot ever written will still be mediocre at best if the characters aren’t compelling. Personally, I love character-driven stories more than anything. Event-driven plots can still be fun, but I prefer the focus to be on how the characters are dealing with said events, as opposed to them just being passively driven along by them. The best is when it’s the characters themselves driving the events of the plot, but that’s more difficult to execute than it sounds. Regardless, it’s the characters that usually draw me into a story in the first place and that keep me interested. And from the perspective of my own writing, I go character-driven, all the way. Sure, some event might happen that drives the plot sometimes, but I’m far more interested in how the characters react to that event than anything else

Yellow: What’s a common writing tip that you mostly ignore?

In terms of writing advice, nothing makes my blood boil more than those posts that say ‘get rid of this entire class of words’ or ‘if it’s not absolutely strictly necessary to the plot, cut it’. Fuck that shit. If you want your writing to look like Hemingway, sure, go for it, but a) Hemingway is overrated, and b) that’s not the only way to write well. Especially as someone who tends to focus on characters, passages that aren’t necessary to the plot may be necessary to establish characterization. Or they may add some emotion to the story that gets the reader invested. Same with wording choices; more or less words can drastically change the tone or mood of the scene. Are there times when you need to cut words and keep things concise? Absolutely, but any writing tip that says ‘remove every instance of [word] in your document’ is fucking bullshit and you should never listen to it

Grey: What’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

Tbh I think every writing tip you see should always be taken with a grain of salt, especially if it’s a ‘never do x’ because there is almost always a situation where doing x is the right thing to do, it’s just a matter of knowing how to do it correctly (looking at you, ‘never use the passive voice’). So really, there are very few I always follow, but I’ll give one that was foundationally helpful for me

Edit in a different format than you write. That can be changing the text size, or the font, or printing it out physically, or whatever. For me, I usually pop it into AO3′s preview function and take notes of things that need changing as I go. It forces your brain to notice things it’s been overlooking for the entire writing period. I only do my final edit this way, generally speaking, but I’ve found it to be incredibly helpful for catching typos and general weirdness in the writing

Orange: How many projects do you usually have going at once?

Because my fics are usually short, I tend to only have 1, but I think I’ve had up to 3-4 before. That’s basically me just popping between documents everytime I get stuck on one until one is finished lmao. But more than 2 gets to be a lot to handle

Currently, I’m really only working on my Big Bang fic, though I do have at least one one-shot I’m planning to write when I need a short break from it

Pink: Which of your characters would become your best friend?

This is so hard because like, I don’t get along with a lot of people generally speaking. I’m also going to treat this as the entire SW cast even though I only write Kylo and Hux, for the most part. And I’m not sure I’d be good friends with either of them. While Kylo would make an excellent self-destruction buddy, I think we’re too similar for the most part to get along. And while I also have an element of Hux in me that’s my anal retentiveness when it comes to organization (not to be confused with cleanliness; I’m talking more about my colour-coded work email and my nested folder system on my computer), I’m also very emotional, messy, and I’m not really equipped to verbally spar with him. I think I would actually do okay with Hux as a boss, not a friend, but with Kylo, I think we’d get along really well until we really didn’t. And then I would be dead lmao

Aaaand none of that was an actual answer. But like, I honestly don’t know? Most of the other characters I really like (e.g. Rey, Rae Sloane, Ventress), it’s because I would have a big huge crush on them which would manifest as my hovering in their vicinity a lot but never actually starting a conversation and then waxing poetic while crying about my unrequited love when I continue to go unnoticed lmao. Which is, well, still not friendship

Maybe Finn… I might get along really well with Finn. He’s one of my favourites as well and I think he’d be really interesting to talk to. Has a lot of interesting views on things, likely a good listener. Hm. I’m still not 100% solid on it, but after far too many words, that’s my answer lmao

Purple: Which of your characters would become your sworn enemy?

Okay, hear me out on this one because the reason isn’t what you think lmao. I’m also treating this less as ‘sworn enemy’ and more ‘person I’d least get along with’ and that’s actually Poe. And the reason is that highly extroverted, extremely friendly people who others call charismatic tend to rub me the wrong way. Like there’s nothing wrong with them, they’re perfectly nice, but they’re just too friendly and my socially-inept, introverted brain always responds to that with DANGER DANGER. And I think he would definitely fall into that category for me haha

Green: Pencil, typewriter, or computer?

Computer. I have written fic by hand before (I also sometimes do planning by hand, just because it can be a bit more visual; Fractured was planned largely by hand when I used to work evenings at a gym and had access to unlimited spare paper), but that’s usually only when I have nothing else to work with. I wrote most of a fic in the Halifax airport on a layover, once. I’ve also done it on my phone, but that’s too fucking annoying lmao. Typerwriters are super fun to use but also very impractical for me; my typing accuracy isn’t good enough

Brown: Do you have a set writing space? Or do you write everywhere?

Mostly I’m at home on my couch, but that’s really cause I have nowhere else to write. I do write at work sometimes (not smut though lmao), but only when it’s slow enough that I can get away with it. And there’s nowhere else I really go where I’m sitting with a computer for long periods of time

Silver: Are you comfortable writing in public places?

I am, yeah. I don’t know why I wouldn’t be tbh. Work is a public place and the only reason I don’t write smut there is because I don’t want to get fired lmao (slacking off is one thing, porn is another). I don’t really ever write in public, but that’s more because I don’t spend a lot of time sitting in public places by myself

Gold: Do your stories usually contain lessons or morals?

Not really… I can’t think of any at least. They always have some sort of closure, though, because I fucking hate open-ended stuff where everything isn’t worked out in the end lmao (or is at least on it’s way there). I’m too fragile for that shit haha

Clear: Do your characters control where the story goes or do youmaintain control?

I tend to write more like an rper than an actual author, based on conversations I’ve had with others, so my characters have a lot of control. That said, if you’ve got your plot and all the major points of it planned out and then you get halfway through and find it doesn’t work because of the characters, then that’s a failure in planning, not the characters taking control. Sometimes things do change and are reworked as you go, that’s the nature of writing, but that still means your plan needed some adjusting, you just didn’t know it at the time. I intentionally leave a lot of room in my plans for the characters (e.g. ‘and then they talk about [blank]. Hux says something mean and Kylo gets angry’ might be my only note for an entire scene), but if you’ve planned enough to actually start writing, your characters and plot should already work together. Characters control the minor details of the story, not the major plot

Tan: Are you open to co-writing a story?

I might be. I’ve never done it before and the Big Bang I’m doing now is the most collaborative thing I’ve ever done writing-wise. If someone approached me and was really interested in it, I might be willing to give it a shot. I’m not really sure how it works, though. I tend to envision it as basically an rp except it’s planned out beforehand and then edited afterwards, but in all honesty, I have no idea how it actually goes

#this was so fun thank you so much #also you're the only one who sent in an ask so it worked out really well lmao #I think it got a little incoherent halfway through but meh that's just how I work most of the time haha #I love to ramble and thank you again for giving me the opportunity to do so <3 #squire reblogs #ask tag #things I am tagged in #sort of but not really #long post #for the folks on mobile #my fic #because I can

3 notes · View notes