#i have bullied my grandparents into drinking water bc they used to just not do that

[mag200]

the way young kids feel attached to their phones is the way i am about having a beverage. like water or coffee or iced tea or a smoothie or something else idc. if i dont have a beverage accessible at all times i will cry like a little baby. im like if a guys idle animation was sipping a drink. if im leaving the house its with my water bottle and possibly another drink of some sort. at all times i am aware of the threat of dehydration. sipping a drink is like a hobby to me. you could ask me if i have any plans on my day off and im like oh i’ll definitely be having some coffee.

[erin-gilberts]

Bc It’s such a good post will you answer all the cafe asks?

Yessss totally! 

Vanilla Chai Latte : Are you in love?

Yes, wholeheartedly and unapologetically, I am. 

My girlfriend and I have only been together for two months, but it’s one of those things where when you know, you know. I’ve been in relationships lasting upwards of a year where I still didn’t know at the end of them whether or not I was in love. Early on in the year, I was actually even having conversations with my mom about how I wasn’t sure I’d ever been in love; I had no concept of what that felt like. I didn’t feel like I was feeling what I was supposed to be in relationships. I wondered if I was aromantic and if I wasn’t meant to experience romantic love.

With her, I’ve realized everything love IS supposed to feel like, and I’ve realized I AM capable of feeling those feelings - I just hadn’t met the right person yet. My heart was waiting for her. 

We daydream of the life we intend to build together, and it delights me to be able to wake up every day and choose her, again and again, as we run boldly and breathlessly into the future we now share. We totally u-hauled but we’re both so committed to blooming and becoming together; it’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before despite having quite a bit of experience in relationships. 

Flat White : Coffee or Tea?

Coffee. It feels more substantial to me with more ways to customize it exactly how you like it. I also just have a lot of really positive memories being in coffee shops! I’m currently obsessing over Starbucks’s seasonal salted caramel mocha. 

Cappuccino : What’s your middle name?

Elizabeth! I was named after my mother and grandmother, so it’s the only part of my birth name I kept when I changed my name. 

Mocha : Dream Job?

A famous professional organizer on the same level as Marie Kondo and Dorothy Breininger! They’re my inspiration and the reason I went into this kind of work. Also, the executive director of my own LGBT-focused nonprofit (which I have been, and I intend to be again!). 

Pumpkin Spice : Dream car?

The super fancy bike I’ll use the day I ride in the AIDS LifeCycle? Haha, I don’t drive and I don’t intend to! 

Jasmine Tea : If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

Ugh, if I could visit any place in the world right this moment, I’d choose to go back to Toronto in a heartbeat. I went there in 2015 for the Inside Out LGBT Film Festival and I LOVED that city. It was so fun and the people were so welcoming. Other than that? Moscow, because it’s where @googoogojob lives, or New York City, because I just learned Hook & Ladder 8 (the Ghostbusters firehouse) is a real place and I want to see it! 

Old English : You’re stranded on an island, who do you bring with you?

Do I have a limit?? If I have a choice, I’m definitely bringing my mom, brother, maternal grandparents, best friend, best friend’s family, cat, and girlfriend! That’s like the minimum amount of people in my life I couldn’t go without. 

Iced Chocolate : Do you have a crush on someone?

My girlfriend, who I continually redevelop a big gay crush on every day! But I feel like that’s not quite the spirit of what this question is asking, so - I also have a big gay crush on Kristen Wiig, which my girlfriend endlessly makes fun of me for! Like, to the point I named my cat Erin Gilbert. 

Caramel Frappe : Favorite video game?

It’s a tie between Minecraft and Undertale. I swing wildly between playing Minecraft daily to not playing for months, but it never gets old. The sandbox nature of the game enables infinite creativity, and the low stakes make it both accessible to me (not a gamer) and relaxing. And Undertale with its story and unique mechanics remains to this day the game to inspire the biggest emotional response in me. I’ve thought about having, “Despite everything, it’s still you” tattooed. 

Iced Lemon Tea : Favorite song/band?

My favorite songs of all time are “The Greatest” by Sia and “I Know a Place” by MUNA, both of which were written in the aftermath of the Pulse shooting and can be interpreted as the process of rediscovering queer joy at the same time your community is constantly faced with tragedy and pain. They hit hard in a beautiful way as a hate crime survivor. 

Iced Cafe Mocha : Favorite thing to do on rainy days?

I like to go out as soon as the storm passes and just walk downtown in the rain. The air always smells and feels so good; it clarifies me and I feel renewed. Walking in the light rain or before / after the storm always feels like breathing, really breathing, for the first time. It reminds me I exist and it reminds me that’s neat. 

Hot Chocolate : Are you an affectionate person?

Yessssss oh my god. I live and breathe being affectionate and not even in a strictly romantic sense. I’m naturally an exuberant person and I delight in making people happy. My girlfriend would also say I engage in “cat behavior” with my demands to be held or touching constantly. XD 

Caramel Macchiato : You’re travelling the entire world but you can only take one person with you. Who do you take?

My girlfriend @sweetmckinnon. Not only would we have the unprecedented opportunity to be gay in every country and continent, but we’re both writers, and we’d write an excellent book about these adventures! 

Green Tea : How tall are you?

5’7. 

Early Grey Tea : The inevitable Zombie Apocalypse is upon us! What’s your plan of action?

I’m rounding up everyone I care about and taking us to the nearest commune of marginalized people. We’ll be avoiding those uber-macho survivalist types like the plague, because their arrogance will 100% get everyone killed. At least marginalized communities would be more likely to understand working together and looking out for the community, not just yourself. 

Mint Tea : How do you relax?

Indoor cycling is my drug of choice. It’s HARD to be mad or stressed when you’re exerting that intensely. I might also write self-indulgent fanfics or indulge in a little controlled chaos (I’m an acrylic pour and collage artist). And talking to my girlfriend, best friend, or mom always makes me feel better, too. 

Vanilla Latte : Board games or drinking games?

I genuinely love board games and wish I had more people to play them with. 

Iced Coffee : Do you like reading? If so, what’s your favorite book?

I like reading, but having ADHD has made it extremely hard to read entire books in recent years. My favorite book is probably The Radium Girls by Kate Moore. The author takes what’s already a horrific story and a dark chapter in American history and with her devastating writing style, humanizes each woman involved to the point it makes you ache to read knowing the inevitability of their fate. Anytime anyone asks me for a book recommendation, this is the book I suggest. 

Italian Soda : Describe your dream date

My dream date would be after we’ve been together for a while - maybe on a date that’s special to us, like our anniversary, or maybe just on a random night because we feel like it, we have one of those super romantic dates like you see in the movies. We dress up super cute, go out to dinner and come home to a bedroom full of candles and rose petals on the floor, and every moment is spent just enjoying each other and what we have together in every way we can. <3 

Sparkling Water : Describe what qualities you look for in a person

Passion - I’m an activist who became the executive director of their own nonprofit at the age of 16. I’m not going to mesh with someone who’s just going through the motions of life without any aspirations. 

Flexibility - It’s a turnoff for me when someone is EXTREMELY committed to a very specific view of how their life is going to be. It tells me right away I’m going to have to continually contort myself to fit into their unbending path, because I accept I can’t predict the direction of my life with any degree of precision and I’m not rigid about it as a result. 

Creative - I’m currently dating another writer and it’s the most fun I’ve ever had in a relationship. The quickest way to get us to pop off into a spirited debate is to get us started about story structure and characterization. We. Go. OFF. And could go off for days. Our shared creative passion gives us endless ground to connect and bond on. 

Those are just a few, but definitely a few important ones for me! 

Orange Juice : Have you ever had a valentine?

My first girlfriend, who I dated from 12-17, is the only valentine I’ve ever had. The timing of my relationships as an adult has never worked out for me to be partnered on Valentine’s Day. We weren’t super out about our relationship at the time and didn’t spend Valentine’s Day together, but I still have the love letters she sent me copied into my 7th grade diary, and I still have the antique gold heart necklace with enamel roses she gave me one year, too! Lots of lovely memories from that relationship. 

Rose Hip Tea : Describe your first kiss

My first girlfriend and I were 12-13, cutting class in the bathroom because she was often bullied for her sexuality. She was having an especially rough day that day and I knew exactly where to find her. She kissed me out of the blue while I was comforting her and in all of my baby gay naivety, I hadn’t fully realized I was gay or that she liked me that way prior to that. Turns out I was and she did. We dated for five years. 

Herbal Tea : You’re at a candle shop, what scented candle do you buy?

Oh, I’m going right to the bakery scent section. I’m not a huge fan of chocolate-scented candles, but vanilla? Christmas cookies? Gingerbread? Sign me the FUCK up. 

Sandalwood is also one of my favorite scents, but depending on what it’s blended with, it can be hit or miss for me in candles. 

[blaisein]

ok so here’s the story from a-z so i’ve never vacationed at a lake before?? but apparently the fam was into it idk. so three of my siblings went down to the dock where i was reading (it’s a creepy ass dock scratch that a creepy ass place i have the receipts so does kianna ask her it is on its friday the 13th shit and did i mention i have to sleep alone in one of the cabins tonight? boi bai but anyway) they were all like omg caelyn get in the water with us and i was like probs not but ok. and they are splashing and being gross but highkey i’m too scared bc for some reason the water was giving me anaconda the movie vibes so i wasn’t gonna go in! but they are stinky and calling me out for being scared (i’m the oldest out of who was there but do i care? no it’s scary) and somehow they convinced me to get in. well more like pushed they pushed me in. i was screaming. like i tried to climb back up and these demons would kick my head back down like what !!!! anyway all drama aside i eventually was okay with it and we were like u kno what would be cool? floaties. or whatever those big things are called like tubes and shark floats or wtvr. so we got in we were splashing but lowkey i was waiting for the snakes to come. but anyway so we’re racing and stuff and eventually i was over it so i just got out and my siblings were like omg caelyn get your float as i was like ok but it like .. started to drift away. by then i was too lazy to get it even tho i def could have (ok actually i was once again scared bc i floated towards the creepy hanging boat we have so i said not today) but they started yelling bc it was my fault but meanwhile none of their asses were getting it either if it was such a big deal ??? so i was like i am only getting it if y'all swim with me and they wouldn’t and tbh it’s pathetic lol i’m 4 years older than the oldest one my sisters that were there but whatever. so they are just being mean and i’m too scared and so it starts to get FAR like so far away so i actually start swimming bc imma get my ass beat if i lose it. so i head off, super scared bc i know the snakes were following me. and jet skis and boats and shit are making waves so i’m like fr and the tube is just so gone now but i’m swimming anyway. i mean in a blink of an eye this floatie vanished. then i’m like damn imma drown (the irony bc i used to swim competitively like i’m a swimmer but i did NOT want to do this i wanted to die via drowning instead of snakes ok) but eventually i’m like “HELP OMG HELP” bc i was getting too lazy and then this big boat comes and is like “um u ok fam” and i said “no i’m dying and i lost my floatie” bc by then my man was gone like out of sight idk how it happened. so i can still hear my siblings yelling at me from the shore, the skanks were salty bc they knew they’d get in trouble too. then the people in the boat pick me up but tbh in that moment i felt like if my brother and sisters weren’t there i may have been kidnapped bc i’m paranoid. anyway. so i am getting yelled at by them ugh so annoying so i haul ass up to the house to tell my parents and my grandparents about what happened. i rly didn’t want to but i swear my little siblings were bullying me! lol. my gma is like fr caelyn and my mom was like just go swim for it but ??? pls. so my dad and grandpa are like ok we’re gonna drive to the other end bc he thought he could see it out of the window (this is so dramatic all for a tube!!) like he was out there with binoculars. i felt bad so i was like “ok i’ll stay in my bathing suit so i can dive in this is my duty my responsibility my fault” n everyone rolled their eyes bc they know i’m flaky lol. anyway we get in the car and my grandpa drives us to the house where he thinks he saw it get stuck by a pier. so we walk up to the door (the house is gorgeous it’s aesthetic probs cost a million and bajillion dollars) and knock. no one answers. we see packages out front so we’re like “ok maybe they’re away” so my grandpa sNEAKS AROUND BACK AND STARTS TRESPASSING and i’m like oh no this is death. so i go with him and we run out back and get on their dock which is LIT. i’m talking hammocks, jet skis, couches, chairs, a boat, a bAR LIKE AN ALCOHOL BAR (lowkey i looked for some jameson), and all this crap i was shook. we looked and couldn’t find this stupid ass float thing and then a boat comes thru. it’s the people and the dog that saved my life!! but like … they were getting close and i was sure they were getting ready to dock so i start sweating. this was their house we’re about to get our asses beat. so my grandpa’s charming ass self starts to explain the situation and the lady is like … ok she said okay like maybe 50 times i was fr sweating. perspiration was real. and then like they start actually connecting i was like um what’s happening. they’re talking and he’s being all smooth and the husband was like ok lemme get out on one of our thousand jet skis and see if i can find it. and so my grandpa and the wife are just talking and i’m sitting there with the dog chilling then they’re like “omg we have the same lawyer !! what” like they are BONDING OVER HERE HE GOT HER NUMBER SHE’S LIKE COME OVER FOR A COCKTAIL?!? i was shook like we fr were committing a crime and snooping and btw they like saved my life earlier and def thought i was problematic but here we are. then i start talking w them and they live right next to my university they offered me to chill during the school year like ???? and she said if i ever wanted to VACATION WITH THEM in california i could like wffffff they are freaking millionaires i will take them up on that. anyway so we made bros with these people and they were like ok we’ll text u if we find it (text us wtf is happening guys this is all bc of a floatie and my problematic lazy ass). but i mean we still didn’t find the tube but by then we said whatever let’s just buy a new one (after 2 hours we came to this genius conclusion). so we go back to our cabins and my grandpa is like OMG I SEE IT HOP BACK IN THE CAR and by now i’m 50 shades of done with this but it’s my fault so i hauled ass. so we get in the car and start driving god knows where i’m like wtf but we arrive at ANOTHER HOUSE it’s under construction so my grandpa is like yeah we can def trespass here too and i’m like !! tf ??? but i get out anyway. and #1 i’m like how do you know the floatie is here this is tragic. so we start walking towards the lake but it’s like all woods here i’m fr walking in my bikini and flip flops it’s tragic. so my grandpa is like “ok u stop i don’t want you to get hurt so just stand here” and tbh i didn’t protest bc i’m lazy trash and also i know he wouldn’t let me i could get in trouble lol. so my 72 year old grandfather in his golf shirt and khaki pants starts climbing down to the lake and i see him JUMP OVER A FENCe he is as extra as i am. but yeah so then he disappears and he calls me and he’s like “is the tube black with yellow shit” and i said !!!! that’s it!! so 5 mins later he runs up, sweating and holding the tube i just stood there like “this was the most extra thing they are $5 at the store” but we found it we got it we survived and then we went home and had drinks with the millionaires lol so this was very long but i’m not a good story teller it was so DRAMATIC and i don’t think i hyped up enough the part where i almost died i was going under my fear was crimpling. but lol the end!! this was not worth the wait lol but lemme tell you the millionaires are cool i’m about to go jet ski also hmu if you wanna see pics of my friday the 13 house i'm sleeping in alone i'm shook