#i have my own haircuts planned out for like the next 10 years

[conanssummerchild]

the new short hair mike era has taken me completely by surprise tbh and even tho he looks cute and i love the theories some ppl are coming up with can we have a moment of silence for long haired mike ☹️😔

rip long haired mike u will always be famous

[bumblebeehug]

Endless Devotion

Ship: Natsu Dragneel x Lucy Heartfilia Summary: Natsu spends the morning preparing something important. Day 1 of Nalu Week 2023 - prompt: anniversary Ao3

***

The morning air was cool and tranquil as Natsu began his day. He was up early, tripping around carefully to not wake up Happy who still peacefully slept in his miniature hammock, like the one Natsu extensively used. Usually, they both slept in Lucy’s apartment, but since Lucy hosted girls’ night last night, Natsu had been temporarily kicked out. Girls’ night was no joke for the Fairy Tail girls; they planned elaborate games and picked food and movies as if their lives depended on it. Early in their relationship, Natsu and Happy had hung around on her roof (with Lucy’s permission of course, he didn’t really care about spying on a bunch of women gossiping for hours, but he liked staying close to her, and still do to be frank) and overheard the most elaborate, detailed discussion on whether the shop clerk two blocks over had finally gotten his hands on the gift to his wife, or if the nearby elementary school teacher had gotten a new haircut to impress the new substitute teacher. Really, he had found out that they could talk forever about anything and everything, and after that he figured that it was easier to just let them do their thing. He had always liked seeing Lucy have fun with her friends - especially when he knew that she still liked him the best.

The girls’ night might have been the cause of what made him sleep at home, alone, but today he would get to have Lucy completely for himself. It was their two-year anniversary, and Natsu had the entire day planned. Even though he hated to wake up early in the morning, he had already washed up and grabbed a cup of coffee. The day had to be perfect, especially since they hadn’t seen each other since yesterday morning, which was a longer time apart than they usually spent.

To start their anniversary, he wanted to cook Lucy some breakfast, cue his early morning. He knew what time Lucy usually got up, and since she’d no doubt been up late yesterday, there was no worries about her getting up earlier than usual to get ready for the day herself. That way he could easily sneak in and make her a hearty breakfast, and as she would get ready for the dates afterwards, he had plenty of time to prepare for the next part of his arrangements.

His train of thought got briefly interrupted as he heard Happy stir in his bed beside his own hammock. The poor exceed had been plagued for days with Natsu’s never-ending planning and had gotten his sleep schedule all messed up.

“What time is it?” He groggily asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“Sorry buddy, it’s still really early. Was just thinking I’d do some dishes while I wait for the coffee to brew. I’m not used to the slipperiness though…” Even while trying his best, Natsu struggled to keep his voice down. His heart was beating fast, and he looked forward to spending the day with his girlfriend. It was almost like he was reliving how things were two years back, when every day made him a nervous wreck before he saw Lucy’s face. Though now he wasn’t particularly nervous – just excited and giddy.

“Well hurry up and get used to it, I want my dream back,” the blue cat muttered.

“What did you dream about?”

“It was the best dream I’ve ever had,” Happy began, “I had just saved the kingdom from a huge, mean dog, and when I say it was huge, I mean gigantic, and so the princess, who actually was Carla and not Princess Hisui, gave me unlimited fish and her hand in marriage in reward.”

“Sounds like a pretty awesome dream,” Natsu smiled, giving his back a supportive pat. “I can’t promise Carla’s hand in marriage or unlimited fish, but I went by the market yesterday and picked up some fresh salmon if you’re hungry. I’m leaving in 10 minutes, and I probably won’t be back until tomorrow.”

“Yeah, I know, the date stuff. I’m sleeping over with Carla and Wendy tonight either way, they promised I get to choose which board games we play after dinner. Tell Lucy I said hi.”

“Sure will.”

Things had become different when Natsu and Lucy started dating. Of course, there was the obvious stuff – the kissing, the PDA, (the sex), but Natsu hadn’t anticipated how little time he would get with his other friends. He didn’t mind it of course, he was often the one who glued himself to Lucy’s side, so naturally there would be less one-on-one time with other members of the guild, but it was a change, nevertheless. Happy was the main guy who made him realise this change - see, before Natsu and Lucy got official, there was nothing stopping him from hanging around all the time. The three of them were as tight as any trio could be - they all had the same inside jokes, they shared every secret about themselves, embarrassing and emotional alike, and they always kept together. As soon as Natsu and Lucy’s relationship truly fell in place, however, they couldn’t share everything with each other anymore. Mainly because Happy was completely uninterested in what they were doing whenever he wasn’t there, (the deed, usually), but also because whether they liked it or not, a romantic relationship changed the dynamics in their friend group.

The teasing between the three of them never stopped, but it changed. Natsu no longer had the ability within himself to take jokes a notch too far - he simply didn’t like seeing Lucy getting more upset than necessary, and so it mellowed out.

For Natsu, the rest of his friendships changed as well, though mostly it was a better change. He had gotten closer to Gajeel and Gray, who he now could relate more to. Who knew endless hair shedding was universal? And for once he understood all the weird things Gildarts had been talking about (dirty old man).

Either way, life had gotten way more fun now that Lucy Heartfilia was in every part of it, and today he intended to show her just how much he appreciates her in his life. So, as previously mentioned, he had planned the perfect breakfast and chill morning. He knew how Lucy loved getting ready – she often preferred those times over the actual outing, since she gave herself all the love and attention she craved for a good day. Well, Natsu could easily do that himself, but he knew that she liked giving herself that time.

After she would be finished getting ready, she would probably wear way too uncomfortable shoes to walk any long distances, and given that most beautiful sceneries were quite far away (and Natsu refused to get motion sick on one of the best days of his life) he’d planned to first take her to a bookstore so she could browse the shelves, maybe she would overhear someone complimenting her book (“maybe” as in definitely – he had pulled some strings to make it happen), and as the time would go by she would find herself getting hungry. They’d then buy a simpler lunch and sit by the cherry blossom tree Natsu once dug up for her, and they’d just talk and have a nice time. Then the plan was to walk by the canal, still not exercising like crazy, and they’d stop buy some markets and Natsu could buy some small souvenirs or other types of jewellery, and then, after all that, they’d be just in time for Natsu’s restaurant reservation. It was one of those more expensive places – the type of place Natsu usually couldn’t stand being in due to the uncomfortable atmosphere. He had, however, been there recently to try out their food (planning ahead and all), and the waiters were surprisingly okay with his manners, or lack thereof. So, after a great dinner, he planned to give Lucy the anniversary gift he had bought; a necklace with a thin, golden chain, with two small charms, one being a star with a diamond in the middle, and the other being a small flame. From a distance it just looked like an ordinary cute necklace, but looking closer there would be proof that Lucy (who was symbolised by the star of course) and Natsu (the flame) belonged on Lucy’s neck, close to her heart. Then the night would end with stargazing and maybe sex if the stars were in his favour.

Well, that was the plan anyways. He knew that executing it would be a different story, since despite making them simple, plans never worked out as, well, planned. He could always try his best though, and he certainly intended to. He checked himself one last time in the dirty mirror by the front door. His clothes were clean and tidy, not a wrinkle in sight on his pants, his hair was as tamed as it could be, and he had a clean face. He made sure his gift laid safe and secure in his pocket, grabbed his bag with breakfast food, and headed out the door, heart beating rhythmically against his ribcage. He was so excited to give the love of his life the perfect date. Maybe next time, he’d have the courage to stand on one knee and ask her to marry him – but for now, what they had was perfect.

[yatorihell]

Noragami Reread Volume 7-10

One word: Hate!

Volume 7

24

Oh the art of the three of them I'm so sad

Oh look at Yato's face he's so sad I hope we see it again in the final chapter

'Don't cut our ties I want to be with you longer' I'm going to kill myself live at five

God Yato planning the wedding and holidays he's down bad

Oh that's so me calling someone whilst already lurking nearby

SEVERAL GUN EMOJIS FUJISAKI IS HERE

What if Hiyori and Fujisaki get together at the end lol (I will commit)

HE'S A GOOD BOY LOOK AT HIM

YATO SAYING SAKURA AND HE'S THINKING IF HIS DEAD SHINKI AND YUKINE'S REAL NAME AND WHERE HE BURIED HIM

Yukine not questioning Hiyori if they're gunna picnic again next year he believes her I'm so sad

AND YATO WILL KNOW YUKINE'S GRAVE IS FLOWERING RN

Hiyori forcing peace between Yato and Bishamon at the picnic

Oh the picnic I'm do sad Aiha is apologising to Hiyori

Oh yh make Yatobisha canon this is hot

Bubble era Yato fucks (hypothetically)

'Yato would become a raging spirit for you if he had to' I'm vomiting

I'm going to kms 'Because your life was in danger. Even if it meant plunging the heavens in to chaos, killing a god, rescuing you was their highest priority'

Tenjin telling Hiyori she has the power to make Yato like that's its been 24 chapters!!!!

Tbh Kofuku at the party is bad luck

YATO WHY DID YOU FAKE KISS HER getmarried I'm Aiha's reaction

'I ain't gunna help you a third time' lol sike

Hiyori annoyed blushing remembering the kiss

'You're yatos first' I hate life

Oh the little trio picnic

'He must have been lonely for such a long time'

Oh they're walking together their height is changed she's taller it's been 6 months

Divine possession for the plot let's gooo

25

Bishamon military outfit is a serve

Crafter plot begins

Ebisu's stupid little hat (affectionate)

This is such a dodgy chapter jahshs Yato please

Yato sabotaging Hiyori reputation

Yes beat the shit out of him Yukine this is not a good chapter

26

All theese horny kids looking for Hiyori's services Jesus

Argument about selling Yukine to Ebiau hshsh

'I'll build my own shrine without any help'

Yato in a money pile

My god did someone call whilst masturbating

'GO GET YOUR BACK DOOR SMASHED IN' the way I choked!!!

'You just can't commit'

No one would make him a shrine oh I'm so sad Adachitoka you make me so sad

Shrine!!!!!! She made him a shrine!!!!!!

Yukine go away it's a perfectly fine shrine

'ITS PROOF THAT PEOPLE CARE'

Ebisu is so ominous and turns out he's just like a guy who can't do shit

27

Yato forced them to approve the shrine he's a real god now

'Once people forget about them they fade away'

'Shrine helps people remember better' is it going to trigger Hiyori final chapter

Yato survival through the ages called into question foreshadowing

Foreshadowing of Kazuma binding Yukine

'Someone once told me I didn't need one of those things' yh your bitchass dad

'I'm gunna make Hiyori the happiest girl in the world' CAN YOU

Oh the lamp night light for Yukine I'm so sad

Oh Nora you little freak get him

Yato gets a pass for killing that guy because he was bad <3

Yato failing to break up with Nora 

Father get a haircut

'Do you think Hiyori and Yukine can really love you' YES!!!

Image of Father taking the shrine

I liked it more when Hiyori got kidnapped lol

Vol 8

28

He prefers Yukine as a shinki!!!!

How would Father know about Yato's shrine???

Father shaggy hair era

Hiyori knowing something wrong that Yato didn't appear for a while

Yato disappeared months or years leaving shinki behind, I wonder if any of them strayed

Father stop trying to smash your sons girl

Savage Hiyori doesn't like your musty ass

I like Okuninushi

Why does he can Ebisu baldy

Why is there a bunny on his bike

Kuraha questioning his purpose is me

Yato has a conscious of who he's killing if it's justice

Yato putting the kid in the cupboard to save him from seeing the murder

Wonder if its an old wish from the woman or her soul, and is she aware she was left to die up there

Tbf it's good work he does killing these people

Oh he's panicking about Hiyori forgetting him

Oh look at that crazy face girl gone wild

Oh he's so scared

Yomi arc let's go

29

Hhf Daikoku is a rip off version

'I need to get back' + Hiyori vision

I'm begging please stop the Hiyori sex thing

Capyperland trip incoming

Hiyori's starting to forget about them hate!!!

Takemikasuchi is such a snitch then it turns out he's just lame

Yukine became hafuri in 6 months daddy issues makes strong bonds

'Even if I do make it back in one piece it won't mean a damn thing' WHAT WILL HAPPEN FINAL CHAPTER!!!!!

30

Yato feeling sick about sharing shinki

HOME TO THEM

Yukine studying at Bishamons house

CAPYPERLAND

Oh I hate his bangs kill him look at all the bookmarks in his guide

Bitch is really at a theme park with Yato's girl whilst he's fighting for his life

Oh I'm so sad she's thinking of Yato and seeing him in bitch boy

SHE'S FORGETTINGGGG I'm ending it she can feel somethings wrong what will happen final chapter!!!!!!

Fujisaki stop fucking blushing

'I feel like someone is missing even though we were always together'

'MAYBE THAT PERSON NEVER EXISTED' MAYBE I'LL KILL MYSELF

I WANTED TO BE WITH HIM LONGER

The face I made looking at that kiss

31

Fujisaki die challenge

SHE CAN'T SEE HIMMMM Yukine stopped worrying about being forgotten and was forgotten

Oh I hope the scent triggers her memories I'm so sad maybe it'll be open ending

Daikoku bursting in crying about kofuku then embarrassed Hiyori is there

Hiyori's diary entey 'Yato is staring at me and not saying anything'

'Thought I would never forget but I'm not an exception' I hate this manga

I don't believe it's a joke that Yato knows bondage art

Heavens justice net foreshadowing

'Why do you exist yato'

'So I don't wanna disappear' vs latest chapter I'm so sad

'I just wanted to make someone happy'

A god that brings people happiness

Oshi is such a bitch strays aren't illegal you've just got purity culture

Kagome song is creepy look it up

Nora gets more emotional and expressive as the manga goes on, mainly because Father's always leaving her behind

Vol 9

32

Yato sees Hiyori in Izanami as persin he's comfortable with

'You love me too don't you' he combusting

Father pocked marked girl flashback

'I wonder if he ever got to see his loved one' HAAAAA

Lore starta alluding to another name for Yato

Daikoku and Yukine height difference kills me

'A human could never love like that'

I love the fight scenes you can actually tell what's happening

Yeah grab him by the neck wait what

Nora you duplicitous bitch

33

Hiyori pouts being told not to go to ayomu then does the opposite

It's a shame we don't get to see Okuninushi in action in the manga I wanna see the spider freak

'Someone who can make her proud'!!!

Yato helping Ebisu lice

Hiyori thinking of Yato for help when Kuguha grabs her

34

'You're Yato's pride and joy'

Yato tied up ohoho

Yato really trauma bonds with Ebisu and hauls ass out of there

35

Baby ebisu

'Don't you dare die on me' AHA

Ebisu wanting to live after meeting Yato

Oh Kiun yes

Bishamon’s armour is such a look it's a shame we don't see it more

'My blessed one' and people wonder why Kazuma is her bitch

Exploding child out of left field, that was such a confusing scene when I first read it

The chapter opening and ending with 'you will live again'

Ebisu really just blows up... reminds me of the Gamecube edit I made of that lol

Vol 10

36

God Yukine witnesses Ebisu's death, what if he thought that would happen to Yato in the recent chapter

Oh Bishamon’s so pissed let her pop

'Yato's blessed one'

Yukine is so small next to Hiyori and Daikoku

Yato knowing he wouldn't bring Yukine into Yomi because of the dark

'You're a god, who gave you your name?' technically it's Sakura regardless

If/when Yato returns final chapter, I wonder if his true name would be Yato not Yaboku

Hearing Yaboku then imagining Hiyori

Oh the shadow of his father haunting him the parallels

Yes tie him up Izanami

Bishamon has come to collect her twink

Yato's face getting rescued like how have we got this far

Amaterasu first appearance

'The heavens are always right they must never bow to another' are you sure about that

The imagery of Yomi is so pretty, all the line things I forget the name

'Bishamon won't be replaced' girl you had us worried for like 2 years you would be

Yato starts fighting knowing Hiyori and Yukine are waiting

Bishamon starting to be eaten by the women and Kazuma's reaction

'Father heard a voice calling his name' the Tamayobi lore in the notes is interesting to explain how he came back

Soul call oh I'm so sad Adachitoka you make me so sad I'm going to kms

Oh imagine getting to end of 37 for the first time and finding out who father is

38

Hiyori visiting Yato all the time that Yukine is like why are you here again

Yato calling Bsihamon skank even after all that, the misogynist

Oh he's gunna find Ebisu reincarnated

Oh he's so sad

Stealing Kazuma's clothes

Yato telling Ebisu that Bishamon’s real name is skank is dirty

'I fell in love with the world as soon as I saw it' he's too pure for this world

'Was I the kind of god who could make people happy' vs Yato deciding to be that

'You were always willing to give up your own life for others(...) a guy like me could never even compete' vs recent chapter I'm so sad I'm ending it

I WISH I COULD BE LIKE YOU

Kazuma panicking about his missing stuff and the phone

Iwami making Ebisu promise not to die again

Father getting Ebisu taken out because he wants brush good plan all in all

Yato releases Nora and now we have the whole picture of what they went through growing up it makes you hope Nora gets adopted

39

Yato keeping Kazuma's phone saying its his

Yukine stabbing Yato to death is valid

Bishamon starts her personal grudge against Father

Yato watching Hiyori and Hiyori dropping her body to follow, girl you gotta stop

Did Yato watch her then go to Yukine to ask how to be a god who makes people happy I hate it here

Yato past revealed

Yato saying he didn't want stop killing but basically it's OK because he always knew they were bad people

[merlinbingo]

It's the end of the year, and here Peach is, sneaking in just under the wire with the November round up. Sorry it’s so late, and I will do my very best to do better next year...

As always happens at the end of these things, we got a truly mind-blowing number of fills in November - 99 of them, to be exact, created by 20 fantabulous participants! 79 were fics, 11 artworks, five reclists and one moodboard, one gifset, one playlist and one digital 3D model, which is another entirely new format for us (and, can I just say, I love and adore how willing you all are to try new things).

We also got the largest array of foreground ships we’ve seen since February, with 15 different ships (in addition to the 21 gen works you submitted). Merlin/Arthur are obviously top of the list with 50, Merlin/Lancelot a very respectable second with 10, Gwen/Morgana at four and both Arthur/Gwen and Merlin/Freya with two fills each, plus ten additional ships with only one fill each.

And now, obviously, the think you’re actually here for: the round up! As always, you’ll find the November fills below the cut, sorted by ship and then by rating, and we encourage you to check the ratings and warnings before clicking on any of those links.

For now, I bid you adieu, at least until just after midnight when I’ll be back with the round three sign up post!!!

Gen/no ships

A Rising Sky by thefollow-spot Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Divergence - Episode: s05e13 The Diamond of the Day, Arthur Pendragon Lives (Merlin), One Shot, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Canon-Typical Homoeroticism Summary: "Arthur’s hair was cooling-wet: a combination of sweat, the morning air, and the lake water. Merlin reached out a shaking hand and brushed it off Arthur’s forehead with his thumb. His touch was like every one before it." | Finale AU; Arthur lives. Canon-typical homoeroticism ensues.

Modern Merlin by TyalanganD Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Art, portrait, haircut Summary: Modern Merlin with longer hair.

Truth in Light by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Friendship, Magic, A bit of angst, Looking out for eachother, Secrets Revealed Summary: Lancelot is a little worse for wear after a night out at the tavern. In his drunken state he marvels in awe at Merlin's magic, but inadvertently reveals a secret of his own...

Forgiveness by Stelle Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: lancelot, digital art Summary:

Clumsy Merlin by mithian Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Summary:

Arthur by Stelle Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: 3D model, Arthur Summary:

brittle parchment, scattered truth by queerofthedagger Rating: General audiences Warnings: Major character death Major tags: Pre-Canon, Post-Canon, Epistolary, Angst Summary: Five letters Queen Ygraine wrote to her son, and one letter that was written in response.

Merlin in Winter by TyalanganD Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Art, Portrait, Winter, Modern AU Summary: Modern Merlin likes wearing earmuffs in winter.

Charcoal Rain by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Fluff, mother-son relationship, child Merlin, Hunith POV, learning to read and write Summary: Hunith is determined to teach six-year-old Merlin to read and write, but as is often the case with her magical child, things don’t quite go as to plan. Fluff in which Hunith discovers Merlin’s magical photocopying ability, amongst other things.

What Cane To Pass by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Dragonlord Merlin, Post Canon, Confronting Kilgharrah, Merlin has Questions Summary: "I failed?" "No, Young Warlock, for all that you have dreamed of building has come to pass." The words of the Great Dragon have rung in the mind of the Dragonlord ever since that day at the Lake of Avalon. But what did they mean? For there was one thing that was certain; all he'd dreamed of building had NOT come to pass. Or, Merlin calls Kilgharrah one more time, and wants answers

Sleeping Spells by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Accidental Magic, fluff, angst, sleep magic, dreams and nightmares Summary: Merlin has a problem - his dreams are coming true, literally. It all started after eating some of Gwaine's special mushrooms. Gaius is at a loss for a cure, which is all very well while Merlin dreams of flowers and butterflies. It's when Merlin has nightmares that the real problems begin.

One of Three by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Post-canon, angst, destiny, grief, courage strength and magic Summary: In the months after Camlann, Merlin discovers everything he'd assumed about destiny had been wrong. Destiny had never relied on a two-sided coin, but a three-pointed triad. And Merlin had failed to see it.

A Warm Fire by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Child Merlin, Winter, Mother and Son, Magical 3 Year Old, Fluff and Warmth Summary: As a winter storm rages, Hunith is confined at home with three-year-old Merlin, and the firewood has run out. Merlin is cold, and decides to take matters into his own hands.

Just a Nudge by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: S1 Ep3 Mark of Nimueh, Merlin’s Magic Confession, Afanc episode, Arthur Suspicious Summary: Arthur’s idiot servant Merlin had tried to confess to the magic which healed Gwen’s father. Arthur had first thought Merlin had made it up to save Gwen - but now, with the confession replaying over on his mind, he’s having doubts about his earlier conviction. Had Merlin really been lying?

BBC Goncharov: A Fandom Still Thriving by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Goncharov, Paralells, Article, Imagines future, Goncharov as Arthurian-like legends Summary: Fictional article from the future about 'BBC Goncharov', drawing parallels with BBC Merlin

The Secret Handshake by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Yuletide fluff, Left-handed handshakes, confused Merlin and Arthur, Good Morgana, Season 3 or 4 canon divergent Summary: It's the yuletide celebration, and this year guests are attending from all over the kingdom. There's one thing unusual though. Several of the guests are not only shaking hands with the King upon arrival, but with Merlin too... and they're shaking his hand backwards. Merlin can't fathom why, so Morgana goes off to seek answers.

Under a Headgerow by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Child Mordred, Found Child, Protective Arthur, Series 1 canon divergent, Mordred never reached camelot with Cerdan, Summary: Merlin and Arthur return from a hunt and find a young boy, frightened and alone. They bring him back to Camelot to see Gaius.

Anhora' Fic Recs by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Anhora, The Unicorn Guy, Gen Fics, Reclist Summary: Gen fic rec list for the character 'Anhora'

Since Avalon by queerofthedagger Rating: Teen Warnings: Major character death Major tags: Post-Camlann, Grief/Mourning, Reconciliation, Angst Summary: Merlin knows when Kilgharrah dies.

Sweet Child in Time by TyalanganD Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply, Angst Major tags: Canon divergence, Arthur finds out, angst, memory magic Summary: Arthur finds out about Merlin's magic. And then he finds out again. And again. And again...

Torn Threads by Skydragon05 Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Danger, holes in space-time, BAMF Magic, Arthur knows about Merlin’s magic, trying to save the world Summary: Arthur could not see the loose threads flailing and lashing at the edge of the rip, nor feel the evil dark force that lay behind it, straining against Merlin’s hold. He’d seen the effects of it though, the destruction. || Merlin must use all his skill and power to mend a hole in space, Arthur is annoyed he can’t help.

Gwen/Morgana

pancakes by kairennart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: digital art, fluff Summary:

mermaid au by kairennart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: digital art, pirate gwen, mermaid morgana Summary:

I slithered here from Eden (Just to sit outside your door) by Camelots_Daffodil Rating: Teen Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Past relationship, POV Morgana, Set between Season 4 & 5, flashbacks Summary: While she's imprisoned with Aithusa by the Sarrum of Amarta, Morgana dreams only of Gwen.

Mommy kink rec list by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Rec List, Smut, Mommy Kink Summary: A short rec list of fics with mommy kink

Gwen/Lancelot

Caught by a thunderstorm by Laevateinn Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon compliant (kinda), Canon Era, Thunderstorm, Lancelot hates thunderstorms Summary: Gwen and Lancelot, on their way back to Camelot, get caught in a thunderstorm. They take refuge inside a semi abandoned shack, but have nothing to do to pass the time.

Gwaine/Mithian

How Quickly Things Change by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Loneliness, hurt/comfort, laughter, masking, path not taken Summary: Gwaine is one of the knights escorting Princess Mithian on her return journey to Nemeth, after her betrothal to King Arthur has fallen through. When Gwaine finds her sitting alone by the fire lost in thought, he brings her some much needed laughter. He also finds himself offering a shoulder to lean on, as she shares with him her feelings on everything that’s happened.

Merlin/Morgana

Somewhere That's Ours by mithian Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Magic Revealed, Getting Together, Kissing Summary: Merlin and Morgana discover secrets about each other.

Morgana/Mordred

Steal My Breath And Use My Body by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: Rape/non-con Major tags: Extremely Dubious Consent, Sex Slave, Choking Summary: Morgana chains Mordred up and uses him for pleasure

Merlin/Freya

Songbird's Call by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Emotional Hutr/Comfort, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Hopeful Ending Summary: After the pain of Freya's death, Merlin meets with Lancelot, who offers comfort and a shoulder to lean on, as well as some words of advice.

To Be Loved by mithian Rating: Not rated Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Summary: A Freya/Merlin playlist

Arthur/Gwen

oblivious to lovers by kairennart Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: oblivious arthur, humor, digital art Summary:

Fabulous Feathers by Skydragon05 Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Fluff, Humour, Mornings, Golden Age, Merlin has a box of surprises Summary: It's early morning and Gwen wants a lie in. Her children have different ideas, theyre wide awake and they've been raiding Uncle Merlin's Box of Surprises.

Isolde/Lancelot/Tristan

Muddy Waters by dorochas (stanzas) Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Divergence Summary: “He’s moping,” Isolde announced, pulling off the straps connecting her muddy armor and sending it clattering to the floor. “I think he missed us this morning, Sir Lancelot. You know how he loves cuddling—”

Merlin/Arthur/Morgana

Third Wheeling by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: Incest Major tags: PWP, Threesome, Drabble Summary: Arthur and Morgana have some fun while Merlin thoroughly enjoys the show

Arthur/Percival

Don’t Make Me Wait by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: PWP, Semi-Public Sex, Oral Sex, Modern Era Summary: Percy and Arthur have a relaxing morning at the park. It’s a good thing no one else is around.

Percival/Merlin

Bring Me a Dream by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: PWP, Wet Dream, Coming Untouched Summary: Merlin has a wet dream

Gwaine/Percival

On the Wings of Error by chaosgenes Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern Alternate Universe - Gods, Getting Together, Love at First Sight Summary: Gwaine is cupid incarnate and tries to complete his 100th happy couple mission, which is to set up Arthur and Gwen together. Percy, incarnate to the god of war, doesn't make it easy for him.

Merlin/Gwaine

Memories by Stelle Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Merwaine, Merlin Fanart Summary:

Merlin/Lancelot

wounds by kairennart Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: digital art, wound bandaging, blood Summary:

Remember My Love by mithian Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon era, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Establish Relationship, Lancelot's POV Summary: Lancelot comforts Merlin when he's feeling bad about his magic.

The Accidental Date by mithian Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Misunderstandings, Coffee Shop AU, Modern era, Humor, Getting Together Summary: Merlin thinks it's a date, Lancelot thinks it's a job interview. It should be a disaster but love has started in stranger ways.

You Feel Like Home by mithian Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: University AU, Modern era, Roommates, Modern with Magic, Friends to Lovers Summary: Merlin tries to find answers about his magic at Camelot University. Luckily his roommate Lancelot is there to help him.

Vampire fic by kairennart Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence Major tags: vampire au, canon era, enemies to lovers Summary:

Merlin/Arthur

A bit unwell by Castilian Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern Setting, Established Relationship, Sick Arthur Summary: Arthur feels very tired after being sick.

Forgiveness (is a nice thing to do) by heartsocold Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: modern setting, established relationship, fluff, hurt/comfort, forgiveness Summary: “You don’t like her, do you?” Arthur asks after they’ve been quiet for a while. “Fine. No, I don’t,” Merlin replies unapologetically. “I get that she’s your sister and you love her and I appreciate everything she’s done for you and Lily. I’m glad that you have her back now and that the kids get another aunt but I can’t forgive her for hurting you or Lily. Maybe one day I’ll be able to move past it but right now I want to wring her fucking neck every time I think about her.”

Angst is coming by TyalanganD Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Arthur returns, angst, hallucination Summary: Arthur has finally returned, but Merlin can't adjust.

Handfasting by Stelle Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Merthur, digital art Summary: Merlin and Arthur's marriage in Celtic ceremony

Reincarnated by Stelle Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: merthur, digital art Summary: Merlin and Arthur remember their previous life during a school trip to old Camelot castle.

"I wanna" is enough. (No need to justify) by 50quid Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Childhood Friends, School Plays, Friends to Mutual Crushes Summary:

thumbtack down by 50quid Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: AU - Canon Divergence, Parents Merthur, Light Bickering Summary:

Adaptation by RansomNoteworthy Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Awkward Flirting, Books, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Alternate Universe - Bookstore Summary: Working at the bookstore can be boring at times, but Merlin and Gwen have a fit new customer keeping them distracted. Is he there for the books? Is he there for one of them? Is he a figment of their imagination? The owner, Gaius, doesn’t actually care, but he suggests a staff favorites board at the till, because if their new favorite customer repeatedly buys one person’s recommendations, well, maybe it’s a sign of affection and shared interests? And either way, at least then they’ll “be making sales, people, get back to work already!”

Order Up by RansomNoteworthy Rating: General audiences Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Flirting, Oblivious Summary: Merlin's new at the coffee shop, Arthur's new at feeling out of his depth, and Gwen's an old hand at dealing with aggravating people, customers and coworkers alike.

Squeaky and Fluffy by TyalanganD Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply, Past abuse Major tags: Modern AU, Toys, Fluff and humor, slice of life Summary: Merlin keeps squeaky toys in bed, because apparently, he's a dog. But Arthur loves him anyway.

Relax by Castilian Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Established Relationship Summary: Arthur is nervous, Merlin is there to help him relax.

Alternatively, The Future is not set in Stone by royal_spud Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon era, secret siblings and evil twins, prophecy, kid Mordred, worried Merlin Summary: Once upon a time, Merlin believed his future was one that had already been dictated. That had been until Arthur had shown him it wasn't, that he had a life of his own creation to look forward to. And all was good and well. But now, Morgana was asking to take Mordred into her care. Mordred who everyone thought was his little brother, Mordred who was under his care and his watchful eye, Merlin, who once had been destined to kill Arthur, who was now more than infatuated with the little kid. It leaves Merlin to wonder what he'd chosen to believe... If after all, the future was set in stone.

Please take care of me (and shut me up) by TyalanganD Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern AU, babysitting, humor, getting together Summary: Life is so unfair. The moment Merlin moves out of his family home, his parents hire a hot babysitter. But Merlin has a plan.

Insult to Injury by queerofthedagger Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Divergence, Post The Darkest Hour, Secret Siblings/Evil Twins, Merlin's Magic Revealed Summary: On a grief-soaked day in November, Arthur reveals that he knows of Merlin's secret. Except. If only it were that easy.

Love in a Time of Dragons (Chapter 1) by Camelots_Daffodil Rating: Teen Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Post Canon, Angst, Dragonlord!Merlin, Immortal!Merlin Summary: After Merlin loses everything, he needs to find something new to live for, at least for the time being. The thing? Dragons.

This is a love story by TyalanganD Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern AU, getting back together, post-breakup, asexuality Summary: Five years ago, Merlin and Arthur broke up. After all, one is supposed to enjoy sex with people one loves - and Merlin couldn't. Now, they bump into each other in a coffee shop. This totally is a love story. Only, not the one you'd think.

I've got you (under my skin) by Sage_Owl Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Kidnapping, canon divergence, Arthur knows about Merlin's magic, Established Relationship, Merlin is so done. Summary: Merlin and Arthur get kidnapped, again. Merlin's rather sick of it.

turns to dust by Sage_Owl Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Alternte universe -1930s, Dust bowl, secret relationship, alternate universe- farmers/ranch Summary: Arthur and Merlin are both trying to escape something. Can they find a way out together?

A Pawn No Longer by Sage_Owl Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Redeemed Morgana, Canon divergence, Morgana's magic revealed, Arthur knows about Merlin's magic, established relationship Summary: The throne room smells like smoke and blood, and there is a vial in Merlin’s pocket that he refuses to touch.

Merlin Emrys' Values by TyalanganD Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply, Creepy dark comedy Major tags: Addams Family Fusion, Creepy fluff, asexuality Summary: Since Merlin and Arthur got together, they’ve been experimenting a lot. There was the guillotine and the electric chair in the attic, and the ring of fire in the basement. There was also some cuddling and kissing. But there wasn’t much sex, to be quite honest.

Camelot's Conniving Cloak Crook by Sage_Owl Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Arthur knows about Merlin's magic, comfort, canon era, established relationship, King Arthur Pendragon Summary: Arthur's day begins badly, and only gets worse. Where on earth is his cloak? And more importantly, Merlin?

Shades of Blue by mithian Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Teachers AU, Arthur teaches science, Merlin teaches art, Painting, Kissing Summary: Arthur’s never seen Merlin paint before, and now he can’t take his eyes off him.

Goodnight, Stars by Sage_Owl Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Teenagers, Circus AU, Acrobatics, First Kiss, Modern Era Summary: Merlin's having trouble with a trick. Arthur ends up being more distracting than helpful.

From M to A by TyalanganD Rating: Teen Warnings: Self-harm (not graphic) Major tags: Modern AU, soulmates, role reversal, angst with a happy ending Summary: In a world where people bear marks with the first letter of their soulmates' names, Merlin, a talented artist, tries to find happiness and fulfill his mother's expectations. It's way harder than he thinks. And then, life kicks him in the butt.

Dragon's Legacy by Zaharya Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Dragon!Merlin, Hurt Merlin, Protective Arthur, Hurt/Comfort Summary: When Arthur against all odds manages to mortally wound the dragon, Kilgharrah bestows his magic unto Merlin in an attempt to save his kind.

Rumor Has It by RansomNoteworthy Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Misunderstandings, Awkward Conversations, Coming Out, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers Summary: Arthur hasn't met all of Morgana's new friends at college, but he's especially suspicious about this new guy he's heard is dating Gwen. That's nothing a few conversations can't clear up-- or make much more complicated. After talk of OnlyFans accounts, and discussions 'through the closet door,' how will it all shake out?

Message Not Received by RansomNoteworthy Rating: Teen Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Feelings Realization, Protective Merlin, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Angst with a Happy Ending, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers Summary: Hospital coworkers Arthur and Merlin are best friends now, however that happened, and nothing can come between them: Except maybe a car accident, a coma, and a whole bunch of uncovered secrets and realizations.

Buried Within Us (I Love You So) by Mischel Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Summary: When Arthur asks Merlin to let him feel his magic, Merlin's magic decides to do its own thing and let Arthur know just how much he's loved.

Edge of Our Seats by RansomNoteworthy Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Near Death Experiences, Confessions, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Airplanes Summary: Bandmates Merlin and Arthur have had a million conversations over the years, but there's a few things they never had the time or the nerve to say to each other. A near-death experience is as good a time as any to finally say what they mean.

Fix-it' fics rec list - Merlin BBC by Laevateinn Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Rec list, fix-it, episode coda, post canon, gen and Merthur Summary: Rec list of fix-it fics!

You're My Escape by mithian Rating: Teen Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon divergent, Living Together, There's Only One Bed, Magic Reveal, Getting Together Summary: Merlin and Arthur flee Camelot to live in a cottage in the woods together.

A Heart is Made to Ache, Break and Heal by royal_spud Rating: Mature Warnings: Major character death Major tags: Unhinged Merlin, unrequited love, magic reveal, hopeful ending, heartbreak Summary: Merlin's always been the kindest among them, barely able to stand the sight of a dead rabbit. He despised violence and loathed hunting. And flinched at the sound of clanging metal. But when a sorcerer snatches the king and his knights from their bedchambers one calm night, and forces them all to watch him as he rampaged everything and everyone in his way as he searched of them, well kept secrets come spilling out; leaving them to wonder just how well they knew who Merlin was. If he was the same person who smiled as bright as the sun and sung to himself and made flower crowns. The person they'd known, and adored, and some had even grown to love. Or if he was someone else entirely.

Everything is just fine by TyalanganD Rating: Mature Warnings: Rape/non-con Major tags: Merlin and Arthur are together, and when one day, Merlin agrees for them to take things a bit further, his body suddenly reacts in an unexpected way. And then, past trauma comes to the surface. Summary:

The Labour of Love by TyalanganD Rating: Mature Warnings: No archive warnings apply, Non-graphic violence, injury Major tags: Greek Mythology, Hurt Arthur, Injury, star-crossed Summary: When Arthur is tasked with a labour of killing the Lernean Hydra, he meets a beautiful youth: Merlin.

As We Know It by Sage_Owl Rating: Mature Warnings: Major character death Major tags: End of the world, reincarnation, hopeful ending, gentle sex, short one shot Summary: Merlin and Arthur find themselves at the end of the world. Again.

You Are A Scar by MerthurAllure Rating: Mature Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: High School, Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, First Kiss Summary: Merlin’s life suddenly gets a lot better.

Transforming by TyalanganD Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Modern AU, Trans Merlin, Exhibitionism Summary: The evening starts with Merlin noticing new changes happening to his body - and ends with something steamy.

BDSM rec list by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Major tags: Bdsm, Rec List, Kink Exploration, Painplay, Gun Kink Summary: A rec list of bdsm fics

Model Behavior by Sage_Owl Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Photoshoots, glasses, first meetings, masturbation, models Summary: Arthur does a favor for Gwaine, and meets Merlin. Things escalate from there.

And You Love It by TyalanganD Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Era, PWP, Topping from the bottom, rough sex Summary: Merlin is evil. He always demands for Arthur to fuck him in the most inopportune moments. Like, during a Round Table meeting.

I cannot stand the way you tease by Sage_Owl Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Pornstars, Modern Era, Fingering, Roommates, Secret Identity Summary: Merlin's supposed to be meeting a new flatmate today, but his latest obsession, Fitzroy, just posted a new video. Surely nothing will go wrong if he watches for a little while...

Can't help but stare by Sage_Owl Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Pornstars, voyeurism, masturbation, roommates, sex toys Summary: Merlin's flatmate, Arthur, puts on a show. Merlin decides to stay and watch.

Nice Tailpipe [Mood Board] by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Mood Board, Nsfw, Car Sex Summary: a mood board about arthur and his car kink (and his boyfriend who really can’t complain)

The Narcissist’s Thirst Trap by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Social Media AU, PWP, Epistolary, Video Chat Sex Summary: Arthur Pendragon is an up and coming actor. He wouldn’t consider himself a famous celebrity by any means, but he has quite a few dedicated fans. One of which happens to run a thirst blog all about him.

Now that I've got you (I won't let you go) by Sage_Owl Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Pornstars, light angst, bottoming from the top, bottom Arthur Pendragon, getting together Summary: Arthur's finally got Merlin where he wants him. But how will things end?

Like A Tidal Wave by Sage_Owl Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Friends to lovers, skinny dipping, beach sex, teenagers, modern era Summary: Arthur's never been able to say no to Merlin, about anything. Not even at 1am.

Still I Surface in Morning Light by queerofthedagger Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: An attack gone wrong leaves Merlin and Arthur stuck in each other's bodies. While Merlin thinks the most complicated part is that Arthur ends up with his magic, it does not take long until he is reminded that it can always, always get worse. Summary:

gentle bite by queerofthedagger Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Dom/sub, Porn without Plot, Spanking, Praise Kink Summary: Impact; count out loud; rush of gold and warmth.

Mine (pronoun; possessive) by queerofthedagger Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, Possessive Merlin, Porn with Feelings, Emotional Hurt/Comfort Summary: Arthur is used to how everyone treats the body of a prince as something not entirely his own; Merlin decides to do something about it.

Epistolary rec list by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Warnings: No archive warnings apply Major tags: Rec List, Epistolary Summary: A rec list of epistolary fics

[chargetheintruder]

Something I need to get done.

It's occurred to me that the computer virus that took out my last computer, the week of January 11-12, might not be a random occurrence. Meaning it's been on my mind that maybe Google and/or Comcast let that virus through to my machine specifically, on purpose. And that even if those corporations didn't, so much, allow that to happen, still, there's people out there who likely want me gone.

Not just quiet, but dead. I wasn't able to get online and pay bills and take care of my needs for 2 months. I ran out of toilet paper (and backup plans FOR my backup plans on that) multiple times. I starved--living on vending machine "food" and mostly just eating the barest minimum needed to prevent organ failure (about 1200 calories a day). My point is that I made it, but just barely.

I have to assume, moving forward, that I have enemies that (for whatever reason) want a nobody like me dead.

And if I had to guess, some of this has to do with my run-in with a local guy who was, at the time, acting as an undercover cop, watching (and blending in with) the homeless population in town where I live. For whatever head-fucked reason, this buzzcut weirdo got it in his head to call me a Nazi just because I wouldn't listen to his story while he had his buddy crowding me at my back.

And for real, as if the threat to my immediate safety weren't clear enough, okay, the truth is, I don't smoke, don't drink alcohol, and don't believe in (the long-term legality of) weed. Point is I didn't have anything he wanted and I merely told him so, but nah, Mr. Random Ass Buzzcut had to go off and make threats I guess. And since he couldn't get cleared to shoot me right away . . . ?

I'm guessing this person looked me up online, saw some of the things I had to say about the Cop City mess (not supporting it) and about drones and surveillance generally (ditto, not supporting that either).

And so the Rented Bastard got cleared to sneak a virus into my computer, possibly through the cable/coaxial rooms in my building.

What I do in fact know is that the timing of all of this couldn't have been worse, with the virus's hitting during the one cold snap we had this winter, and that this thing was specifically about bricking my Chromebook. A cheap shot, against a cheap computer, going after a shut-in he couldn't reach any other way. And this nearly killed me.

What I'm saying is: make plans for the worst. Plan for disasters to strike, because on the local level you and I both might be overrun with alt-right psychos, and no, not in your whole Zip Code, but on a neighborhood level. Make plans to have a backup phone or internet device just in case. Assume that anything you do to try to save society, WILL have local consequences. Assume the local cops will turn on you. Trust NO ONE with a Buzzcut haircut. Also, don't trust your own local mailbox--if you have to send anything in snail mail, in the postal service, actually send it FROM a Postal Box at least some distance from where you live. Some addresses in some neighborhoods have a habit, apparently, of making sure mail disappears and does not get sent out, whether it's personal letters or bill payments.

Because I've seen the difference in the Media since I've come back. People, some people at least, are hellbent on returning to tyranny and ruin. And even the people who say they don't support Trump, okay? They're also leaning into AI and drones and augmented reality in ways that will support the next bastard. No really, nine days before the Wright Brothers flew at Kitty Hawk . . .at least one newspaper ran an article saying, in effect, that "man will fly in 1-10 million years."

That's how much clue the powers that be, in the Media, want you to have. They want you to be stupid and quiet. They DON'T want you to revolt against AI and drones and surveillance tech. They don't want you to think that pieces of Cop City--the AI profiling, and the augmented reality gear--could still proceed even without the obvious paramilitary training grounds for rednecks and traitors with badges.

And they don't ever want you to make plans that involve your surviving for extended periods of time without the internet. Think. These people--police, Media types, corrupt politicians--want you on your smartphone leaving your breadcrumb trails of metadata and hard data here, there and everywhere. They want you to tell them where you live and what the layout of your abode is like. They want you to make it easy for them, because most of their muscle is selected for ideology, not competence. Anymore Police are selected for their politics and their lack of impulse control--nobody expects them to have a brain or to be allowed to use it.

I would make plans to survive without internet, but I am in too bad a way, in terms of my health. Odds are I won't be able to not be a shut-in anytime soon. So don't do what I'm doing. Don't be the canary in the coal mine--they're the first to die when it goes bad. Be the people who know to get out on the first warning. Make plans that let you keep food, toiletries, shelter and utilities going without your first or second internet devices working. Start from that: not being an internet-dependent shut-in like I am, from my bad health.

Then from there, make three plans to keep this struggle as ingrained as possible. These are more divisive and assume worst-case scenarios, I'm telling you this now.

1-- Learn how to keep and use a sidearm, and get one. Yes, it's necessary, the bad guys WILL have guns, the barest minimum you can do is make plans to shoot back when they show up at your door.

1b-- and having done that, make a short and specific kill list. Keep this to yourself and make sure it dies with you. What I can say about this is: don't think individuals, think lineages. Think family trees, made of cancer, that need to be ripped out root, stem and branch to keep society safe long-term. It's not enough to be rid of Osama bin Laden, for example, when other Bin Ladens live. There's others for whom this applies, and much more so.

2-- Don't become ignorant of that which threatens you. To be clearer, learn about AI, learn about drones, learn how surveillance technology works. Know your enemies, and know their weapons better than they do themselves. Know what the weaknesses are, know how to drop a drone with any improvised tool you can lay hand on. And understand: one weakness that will be a thing for a while is the lithium-ion battery, and/or the lithium-sulfur, or solid-state batteries this technology will need to function. Understand that ANY bricked technology with these batteries on board is a potential weapon itself. Study the chemistry involved and learn how to use it.

3-- Make plans to have your brain, your mind, your thoughts, your metadata and hard data, get destroyed on your death. No, I'm not suggesting a suicide plan where you blow your brains out. What I'm saying is: once you are dead, people can slander you any way they want to, and nobody will defend you. No really, why do you think the police are so into virtual reality? They want to snag the data of the recently dead and abuse it for THEIR agenda. At minimum they want to have the names and faces of the people they've shot dead, saying THEIR words and promoting THEIR garbage.

At worst? Post-singularity, post transhumanist technology, it might be possible to FORCE digital immortality on people, just to FORCE them to "agree with" things they'd never support in life. It could be as dumb and brain-dead as what the police would do, or it could be as insidious as bringing someone "mostly" back, meaning the "resurrection" is 95 to 98 percent accurate, enough to break your heart . . . but on ONE topic they're corrupt and coerced into supporting that which they'd never do in their original, true life.

No really, absent any constitutional protections of one's data and/or thought process post-death, you have to assume the conservative, and/or nationalist elements are GOING to look for ways to exploit you after you've died. It would be better to just abandon the whole idea of digital immortality altogether--just make plans to have your brain destroyed, and your internet traces wiped out, so that the enemies of society don't get to make a muppet mockery out of you.

Yeah. Sorry to go on a bit, but I have to get this poison out of my head, so I'll stop having nightmares about this specific way the world ends. But still, if people in the Media are any indication, some folks are still hellbent on Trump Part 2, and what the fuck even is wrong with people?? Don't you get it that dystopia, ruin and bedlam are what you get out of that? Ugh. No. Let's not turn the entire century into an utter shithole, shall we?

[taeyohonic]

the trophy wife (m)

summary: the proposal doesn’t go as planned (established relationship, idol au, fluff and angst) pairing: min yoongi x fem!reader rating: explicit (18+) warnings (containing spoilers): swearing, robbery, pandemic, vomit, description of injuries and blood (very abstract), mentions of depression, insomina and periods, a hella lot ugly crying info: when i tell you that this is a super-duper fluffy piece, i’m not lying! it was 99% sweetness, so i added a little... angst (but like... only 10%) related work: the stalker | baby, what’s wrong? | favoritism (m) | the trophy wife words: 5.7k

“would you still love me if i became your trophy wife?”

yoongi snorts into his iphone, your grimace too adorable to be taken seriously.

“how bad are these papers?”, he asks. jungkook next to him is stealing curious glances at his hyung’s screen. to hear your voice so distressed makes him worry. you’re the best thing that ever happened to his member – your well-being comes right after his need for homemade kimchi.

“how… can they not know which products contain dairy? how yoongs?”, you vent eyeing the ungraded test in front of you.

“i ate… so much yogurt. the whole class did. we tested so much dairy products… like… so much. we drank all of the banana milk… how can they get this wrong?”, you continue. unbeknown to you, the maknae is now furrowing his brows at your words. wait a minute…

“noona, did you steal my banana milk last week?”, jungkook questions and moves closer to yoongi. before you can hide you see his big eyes joining your boyfriend on the screen.

“wow, jungkookie – your undercut looks so good. damn!”, you say. it’s not a total deflection; he does look extremely handsome after his haircut.

“noona, i thought i sleepwalked”, he whines, not caring for your compliment… right now.

“taehyung even made a meme out of it”, he complaints and you have the audacity to coo at him. yoongi tries to hide his smile, but he can see his reflection grinning on the screen.

“it was oppa’s idea!”

and now his smile freezes as jungkook moves his accusing glare to him. you don’t usually call yoongi by this name. and he’d be all too happy to shut you up in your shared bedroom. but now he and the boys are in the outskirts of seoul to film the newest music video, far away from you and your treacherous mouth.

“hyung?”, jungkook asks with the voice of a cheated wife ready to sign the divorce papers.

“it’s for the kids, maknae”, your boyfriend defends himself to which jungkook only huffs in irritation.

“there was a time when i was the kid – what happened? am i not cute enough anymore? noona? am i not the most adorable?”

his deer eyes stare at you – big, brown and full. you can’t help but to take a screenshot of these two – your rapper visibly done with his member and jungkook in the middle of a banana milk breakdown. you’ll have to frame this picture.

“you’re the most adorable thing there is, jungkookie”, you reassure him. yoongi just snorts when he sees the faintest flush on his bandmate’s face.

“that’s enough praise for him, baby. save it for your students.” there is no humor in the smile you send him. after a beat of silence in which you burry all your frustration deep inside the pits of your stomach, you try to change the subject.

“how is nature?” they’ve been in the woods for weeks, completely closed off from all the city drama. you’ve never seen jimin so excited to drive – while namjoon’s sour face reflected how much the latest failed drivers test bothered him.

“jin-hyung nearly died in the water today. it was epic”, your friend instead of your boyfriend answers and you have to shift a giggle at yoongi’s eyeroll.

“be gone, maknae”

rudely blunt – just how you liked your partner. jungkook just winks at you in a silent goodbye and gets up. he’s nearly out of the picture before his upper body shoves against the rapper. his nose is way too close to the screen and you’d be worried about his eyes – if you didn’t know how often the singer spends his nights in front of his computer.

“noona, you’ll replace the milk, right?”

“jungkook”, yoongi growls in responds. the boy is not acknowledging his colleague, so you give in and nod.

“of course, kookie. it’s already waiting in the fridge for you to come back”, you tell him. as soon as these words leave your mouth, the maknae is satisfied and gone.

“you don’t have to baby him that much, ____”, yoongi says while moving the phone closer to his face. you can see the dark circles under his eyes better now.

“what’s keeping you up at night, yoongs?”, you ask instead of answering his complaint. the rapper smiles faintly at the screen.

“you, baby, always you” yu snort and let yourself lie down on the couch – the papers can wait another day, or a lifetime.

“i wish”, you say truthfully. you’d sell one of your kidneys to relax with the boys far away from the pandemic madness. after having yoongi to yourself for two weeks non-stop, you are way too spoiled. even though your legs are deeply grateful for this recovery time, you miss the constant calm radiating off of your boyfriend.

“i’ll be back soon, baby”, he reassures you and draws lines across the screen. your cheeks look colorless and it worries him just as much as his lack of sleep bothers you.

“make it sooner”, you mutter and close your eyes when you hear his chuckle in responds.

“have you had dinner yet?”, yoongi asks but you don’t want to open your eyes, not ready to face his criticism.

“nah, i’ll wait till sungho gets here.” you don’t need your eyesight to feel his disapproval.

“that’s not very socially distance of you, ____.” yeah, no baby anymore. still, you remain shut off.

“he’s just a friend. one friend. one work friend. one work friend that needs help with the new school cloud. the online grading program is a pain in the ass.”

“and why do you have to do that at six on a friday night in our home?”, yoongi notices the tiniest of smiles on your lips as he mentions your shared home. he, too, loves your little flat with a pandora of memories.

“because i am a loner and don’t have anything better planed for the weekend and my boyfriend is camping in the woods and oh – there is a global pandemic”, you snort and open your eyes to watch your boyfriend’s tensed expression.

“if you’re a loner – what am i then? a stone?”, yoongi asks sarcastically.

“maybe a boulder”, you shoot back with a soft smile that melts his jealousy away… nearly.

“just… don’t let him touch my stuff”, yoongi orders. he’d trade his own maknae to be the one at the other side of your door when he hears a distant knocking sound.

“that’ll be him, yoongs”, you say and move off the couch with as much dignity as one can muster after a whole work week and no motivation left in the bones.

“promise to call me back when you’re in bed?”, your boyfriend pleads, reluctant to let you go. with him going on world tours this phone conversation isn’t your first and it won’t be the last. still, his small request fills you with yearning.

“of course”, you promise, eyes still on him as you open the door without a second thought.

a fist connects with your skull while your eyes widen at the sight of two ski-masked men. the pain is instantly blinding your senses and you start to scream with tears clouding your vision. you fall to the floor before they push their way inside your home. one of them, muscle clad with wide shoulders kicks you in the stomach just to move you out of their way. the other, smaller in statue, crushes your phone with his shoe, the cracked screen frozen with your boyfriend starring at you in horror.

**

namjoon will never forget the bone chilling scream waking him this evening from his nap. he’s never heard yoongi’s voice filled to the brim with pain. not even registering his movements, he tumbles into the living room where is friend is still yelling your name, his face a mask of panic.

“hyung, what’s wrong?”, namjoon asks as footsteps behind him signal the arrival of his bandmates.

yoongi’s hands shake as his eyes stay fixed on the screen of his form. the leader moves first, not able to watch his friend losing himself. when joon steps behind yoongi’s figure to calm him down, a cold shower travels through his body. the screen shows you lying on the floor with red dripping from your mouth. your eyes are closed, but namjoon notices the uneven rise and fall of your chest – you’re breathing.

“jin, call the police”, the leader orders without turning around. his hands try to pry the phone out of yoongi’s fingers, but they are white with pressure and unforgiving. his lungs are still screaming and namjoon’s heart breaks at the scene.

“hyung, - just… calm down”, he says, not quite believing in his own words. he wouldn’t calm down either in yoongi’s position.

“what am i reporting?”, seokjin asks, close enough that the question answers itself as soon as he peaks over yoongi’s shoulder.

“i’d like to report a break-in – there is a person, hurt. the address is-“

yoongi can’t hear his oldest colleague, the voice drowned by his worry for you. at first, he doesn’t register namjoon’s chest pressing behind his back, but then his body shudders when the fellow rapper hugs him from behind.

“hyung, we – sh – it’s gonna be okay. it’ll be okay, she’s okay… we… you have to calm down, yoongi”, namjoon sooths his friend of ten years and rocks them both from side to side.

“taehyung, call the building manager – there should be security in the foyer”, seokjin commands the young man who watches the scene in front of him passively. as soon as he hears his name though, the singer moves to grab his iphone with shaky fingers.

“look, hyung, she’s awake”, joon points out and yoongi shakes his head to move these stupid tears out of his vision. indeed, your eyes are open as you try to even your breathing. it looks like you are crying as well and yoongi has never felt this kind of searing pain before. to see the love of his life in tears and burglars destroying your home while he is in the middle of fucking nowhere, makes him sick. when he sees you trying to get up, only to drop back onto the floor, his stomach turns. yoongi vomits onto his lap and namjoon has to hold his friend upright as he loses consciousness.

**

you’ve never been this glad for the heavy painkillers your boyfriend has tugged away in the bathroom due to his immense shoulder problems. the icepack pressed to your forehead cools for body down; still, you are shaking with adrenaline as you watch the security guard pace in front of you.

“yes, sir, yes – no, of course sir, negative sir”, he looks at your shaking form and grimaces before answering. “minor injuries”, the guard holds his phone further away when his caller answers a few decibels too loud.

“the paramedics are on their way”, he responds, not daring to look you directly in the eye. after another game of “yes and no”, the security ends his call.

“how are you, ma’am?”, the man in uniform asks, but remains standing a few feet away. when he first got here after receiving a hectic message from his boss, you were crying on the floor – alone. his colleague is already checking the floors, while another is combing through the surveillance footage. it’s been five minutes and you still look like a ghost.

his instructions were crystal clear – don’t touch the subject. but his heart clenches when he sees your trembling form trying to calm yourself down.

before you can answer him, two paramedics arrive through the door. they zero in on the blood drying across your forehead. their hands press gently against your skin and ask you questions you try to answer. soon, they move you to a standing position, with your head wound dressed and your vitals checked.

“we’ll take you to the hospital, ma’am”, the older woman explains. with a few steps you are at the door – there, right on the threshold where your nightmare began half an hour ago, stands sungho, chinese take-out and laptop in hand. your fellow teacher looks at you with widened eyes.

“_____ - what the hell?”, he curses and nearly drops his food when you smile at him – your teeth unbeknown to you still tinted red.

“are you her partner?”, the paramedic asks.

“just a friend”, he answers, not letting you out of his sight.

“we have to get her to the hospital – will you accompany us?”, the medic questions and sungho nods. your little crowd moves to the elevator and the security guard closes your door with a soft click. the police will be here soon, he thinks as he watches your beaten figure step onto the elevator.

**

“this cannot be the way to do this, ___”, sungho exclaims while you are staring at the iv-drip connected to your arm in distress. you hate needles.

the hospital’s v.i.p room is normally reserved for celebrities, but they made an exception for you, the girlfriend of min yoongi. sejin’s hunched form outside the room might have played a role in that. bangtan’s manager arrived half an hour ago, worried and disheveled. his posture calmed when the doctors reassured him, you’d be okay. now, he’s waiting for seven idols in various stages of panic to arrive.

“it’s the way this works – just… do as i say, okay?”, you huff. there is a part of you not willing to let the last hours crash into you; not without your partner here. so, you’ve spent the last sixty minutes showing him how to use your new school cloud – the easy way, not the right one.

“but the course still doesn’t show in my settings”, he whines, and you roll your eyes while pushing cold pad thai in your mouth. the rich flavor appeases your hungry stomach and you swallow the take-out down in one breathe. songho is a godsend for bringing the ordered food with him to the hospital. it’s a much-needed distraction from the horror of your cracked rib and light concussion.

“you have to set the course to ‘official’ – it’s still private”, you explain with another mouthful of oily noodles slurring your speech.

sungho’s brows furrow in concentration when you hear heavy footsteps in the hall. the boys are there – and they are not slowing down.

before sejin can even try to greet the idols, yoongi pushes through the door – all six of them only a breath behind.

the second you see him, the tears start without your consent. yoongi looks crazy – his eyes gleam with insanity – as he sucks in the hospital air through his mask.

you’re here. you’re alive. you’re safe. you’re here. he’s here. you are both here. his thoughts are running in circles – not ready to slow down, not ready to expand.

your boyfriend resembles a statue; just standing in front of the hospital bed. his face screams for help and it breaks you as the first cry leaves your throat. in a flash yoongi is moving to you, bumping into a shocked sungho. his finger brush against your wet cheeks like you’d break under his touch, while your body collapses.

“baby”, he whispers – the first word his members have heard since he regained consciousness.

“yoongs”, you answer and throw your arms around his neck. the smell of vomit and sweat makes your nose crunch up, but your boyfriend hugs it all away. his forearms rest on each side of your head – supporting his weight – as he lets you hold on to him, the boyfriend who was playing idol life in the woods instead of being at home with his girlfriend. even through his mask he can breathe in your unique smell, clouded by disinfectant.

“noona”, the youngest whimpers from the doorway. jungkook is silently crying, his mask discolored from the tears. every member looks at you with sorrow, the younger ones visibly not as professional at keeping their emotions together. namjoon looks like he’s aged a decade, but there is a small smile pressing his eyes together behind his mask. you try to reciprocate his smile, but yoongi’s head his pressing against your cheeks with vigor.

“why don’t we give them some space?”, sejin says to which your coworker nods instantly. he’s your friend for sure – but this is a level of intimacy he’s not willing to share with you.

the members need more convincing as hoseok tries to gently pull jungkook back. the maknae vehemently shakes his head, not ready to leave you and yoongi alone.

“we’ll wait right outside, kookie”, seokjin coax him out of the room. he’s still reluctant so go, but jimin’s small body pushes against his back. soon, namjoon closes the door, leaving you alone.

your tears won’t stop and you try to move closer to your boyfriend – you want to feel him all around you. without words yoongi understands your need and presses his body down on yours. there is a sharp pain when his stomach meets your fractured rib.

“ah”, you breathe, hurting. yoongi extracts himself from you in a flash; every fiber of his being furious at your injury.

“baby”, he calls out as his fingers ghost across your ribcage.

“it’ll… it’ll heal soon”, you say timidly.

“how could this happen, baby?”, he asks, still more interested in your upper body than your eyes.

“i-i i should-d have che-checked the door before, ah before answering”, you whimper, ready to face the blame.

with yoongi’s lifestyle comes a certain level of danger. you’ve been trained to be more cautious with everyday things like grocery shopping, inviting new friends over, answering the door without checking the cam.

“no, no, no, no – baby – no…”, he hushes you. “they should have never been able to pass the foyer, nor should they have been able to move to the penthouse level.”

“i-i was so scared”, you admit, linking your fingers with his and pressing them close to your still beating heart.

“i know, baby, me too”, yoongi soothes you and flexes his fingertips against your warm skin.

“i’ve never felt this worthless… you got hurt… right in front of me… and i … i couldn’t do anything.” his voice shakes with emotions and slowly his stare moves to your bruised face. the madness has nearly died in his eyes – but there is still so much pain hidden behind his brown iris.

“i- i could have lost you”, he whispers darkly, speaking a truth into reality he is not ready to face. your crying has stopped now that the both of you are calmer and connected.

“nah, never, remember?”, you say with some form of humor behind your words. “i’m your trophy wife. trophy wives don’t die. first, they’d kill their rich husband”, you remind your boyfriend of your conversation half a lifetime ago.

“it’d be an honor getting murdered by you, baby.” his mask is gone in a flash and then you feel the warmth of his lips against your temple. “just let me finish my third mixtape first.”

**

“don’t move, noona”, jungkook pleads as the warm sunlight irritates your skin. the fresh air is caressing your body while the youngest tries to finish his painting. trees surround the both of you, resting on a soft picnic blanket. it’s the first time since your release from the hospital that yoongi has left you out of his sight. granted, you’re still not totally alone with the strongest bangtan member watching over you like a hawk. but it’s definitely a much-needed break from yoongi’s fretting.

after nearly throwing a tantrum in front of his manager und some staff members who wanted to continue the filming of their new “in the soop” show, all the members knew they’d have to handle their rapper with care. leaving you alone wasn’t an option, so taehyung and seokjin packed your suitcase with essentials and after your doctors determined you ready to rest at home, all eight of you moved back to the chill vacation home in the middle of nowhere.

the last few days have been difficult – the filming staff getting more and more irritated because the members flocked around you 24/7. sejin had to come up with a different schedule allowing every bandmate time to reconnect with you as well as time to do their work. only yoongi was allowed to not leave your side most of the day – him working on the new music being the cover for his absence.

but after days of your boyfriend breathing down your neck, you’ve had enough. so, now yoongi is out on the water with seokjin fishing, while you’re spending time with jungkook.

“when did the police say they are coming?”, you ask the painter. his nose is crunched in concentration as he tries to outline your hipbone.

“they should be here before lunch – if your boyfriend even manages to catch some lunch”, he answers. you snort, messing up his grasp of your proportions.

“i do have faith in seokjin’s ability.” jungkook chuckles but keeps his eyes on your drawing. you look so delicate, so soft, he can’t believe they nearly lost you.

“i got robbed – i didn’t die, kookie”, you read his mind as his eyes darken.

“you got hurt”, he responds through clenched teeth.

“and they’ll pay for that”, you vow. the police had called this morning with the news of your robbers being captured during another crime. you’re still not sure how the officers can be so sure they’re the same criminals, but you’re eager to close this chapter with your statement later that day.

your painting session gets interrupted by namjoon. “the detectives are already here, ____.”

jungkook is by your side in a flash and together with the leader the both of them help you up. the rib is healing and harsh movements still hurt. yoongi had a near meltdown when you tried to ride him yesterday morning only to topple over in pain.

“yoongi and jin don’t have a signal out in the water – but they won’t be long”, namjoon explains and guides you indoors to meet the two officers.

“ms. ______, a pleasure to meet you”, the older policeman says in greeting. the younger one only shifts uncomfortable when he sees you flanked by two famous idols.

“thanks for coming all this way”, you respond and bow slowly, not to put extra pressure on your rib.

“is there somewhere we could talk – uhm- privately?”, the old man asks and you show them to one of the office rooms in the back. jungkook reluctantly leaves your side and joon only squeezes your hand in passing.

“just holler when you need us, _____”, he says before ordering the maknae to clean the art supplies.

with both officers sitting across from you, you nervously fiddle in your chair.

“the two intruders were caught this morning while pawning off their haul”, the younger policeman states and shows you a surveillance picture of two familiar men. their figures alone invoke iced fear in your heart, and you push the picture out of your sight. after a moment of silence, you collect yourself enough to absorb the information.

“what did they steal? i – i didn’t report anything missing, sir”, you question. sure, they trashed the painting yoongi brought for you during your last vacation in italy. and some cloths were thrown across the bedroom – but there was nothing stolen. you even signed your statement last week before leaving for the woods.

the officers look at you like you’ve grown a second head.

“miss, you reported the item missing days ago. there is even a harsh voicemail left with your fiancé demanding a swift investigation.” you shake your head at their words – no, you didn’t.

“which item?”, you ask the men with narrowed eyes. you’d been off the pain meds for days now. but to call yoongi your fiancé? clearly, they’d switched up cases. the older officer opens his briefcase to retrieve a plastic bag with a… ring in it.

“in my days, my wife would have never forgotten about her engagement ring”, the man snickers as you watch the cold metal in front of you. it’s beautiful – it’s so yoongi, you wouldn’t be surprised if he himself crafted the asymmetric diamond set on roughened silver.

you’d dreamed of this moment for over a year – to lay eyes on the ring cementing your future in stone – or diamonds.

never would you have imagined it to be this tainted with two officers starring you down and the jewelry wrapped carelessly in plastic – a piece of evidence – while your boyfriend is fishing with kim seokjin.

“uhm”, you hesitate as emotions swirl around your brain. he was going to propose? to you?

“i had half a panic attack carrying it around with me the whole day – that thing could pay off all my debt, as well as my kid’s college fees”, the officer jokes, still not recognizing your surprise as genuine.

“uhm”, you try again to form words.

“we’ve all the papers here for you to sign; after that we’ll be ready to get out of your hair… for now”, the youngest states and moves different documents across the table. they lie next to yoongi’s engagement ring – your engagement ring.

“uhm”

giving up on forming a coherent sentence, you move along and sign your name on the different protocols. the paper from your insurance company makes your heart still – reading all the zeros on the price of your ring.

this… is by far the worst engagement set up you’ve ever heard of. your hands shack and your signature looks just terrible, but it’s enough for the two detectives. they still don’t seem to find your reaction odd as they collect their stuff and bid you fare well. like a zombie you get up and follow them to the front door, your ring clutched between your fingertips.

jungkook and jimin are waiting for you next to the foyer and jump at the sight of your pale face.

“everything alright?”, jimin asks and places a protective hand on your back. your slow nod does not convince them and their eyes sour at the policemen.

while the younger officer takes a step back, the oldest just chuckles at your idol friends.

“all is well, kids”, he sooths them. then both bow to you and you can only muster an awkward smile, the jewelry heavy in your hand.

“happy wedding planning, ms. ____”, he winks at you before they leave. the soft click of the closing door is the only sound in the hallway. you’re not even sure you’re breathing.

after a beat of silence you flinch at the sound of jimin’s high-pitched squeal.

“weeeedding”, he asks, way too loud and way too joyful. the mochi-cheeked idol excitedly jumps up and down, not really caring that you remain silent.

jungkook on the other hand looks … really upset. “you told the police but not me?”, he whispers betrayed.

you could cry as you feel the headache from your concussion clouding your mind. this is… too much.

“uhm”, you’ve decided to stick with your running-gag answer and push both idols out of your way.

your feet carry you out of the house, through the terrace door and before you know it, you’re running across the green gras. the smell of the lake invades your nose while you search for you boyfriend. yoongi’s boat is still on the water and you spot both men resting against each other with their rods, ready to catch your lunch. sunshine shimmers on the lake’s surface as you run onto the dock. your bare feet press against the wood while your hair rushes around you – the wind breezing through the unkempt strands.

**

“is… is that _____, yoongi?”, seokjin asks his fishing buddy who’s more focused watching the water for prey than his surroundings.

“huh?”, he hums, not really listening to his friend.

“i- i think your girlfriend wants to talk to you, yoongi”, the old singer says hesitantly as he sees you jumping up and down on the wooden dock. this can’t be good for your health.

swiftly, the rapper turns to the spot seokjin is pointing at. and there you stand – beautiful and barefoot, dressed in his t-shirt and some old leggings. your hair is a mess and the sun dances across your skin like the tiniest firework.

“MIN YOONGI”, you shout at the top of your lungs. your boyfriend flinches hearing your loud voice across the water.

“she sounds angry”, seokjin whispers.

“YOU FOOL”, you continue to yell and see seokjin’s shoulders shake with silent laughter.

“oh, i hope the crew gets this on tape”, he says with glee while yoongi really, truly tries to find a reason for your anger. he’s left you alone today, at your request. maybe you didn’t really want him to go? was it a test to see how much he wanted to stay with you? did he fail?

“I GOT YOUR RING!”, you shout and flash the evidence bag high in the air.

immediately, the rapper shoots up from his sitting position, rocking the boat dangerously form side to side.

“yah, yoongi, what the hell?”, seokjin swears but your boyfriend’s eyes rest on you, holding your engagement ring in a plastic bag. there is no air in his lungs – he’s been thinking about this moment for the last two years. he dreamed of your joyful tears, how soft your hands would feel while pushing the silver banner on your finger.

and now… he’s an ocean away from you holding on to the jewelry that got you hurt weeks ago.

“DO YOU WANT TO ASK ME SOMETHING, MIN YOONGI?”, you scream and your boyfriend’s eyes widen when they see the smile on your lips; do you – do you find this funny?

without thinking, he takes a step forward.

You can only watch seokjin’s helpless grimace as yoongi brings the boat out of balance. both idols topple over and splash into the cold sea.

the icy water doesn’t bother the rapper as he pushes to the surface. the sun shines high up while he speeds to the dock. you’ve never seen your boyfriend this determent – his laps forceful and quick, leaving a still shocked seokjin behind.

your fingers shake as you watch him come closer and closer to you. in mere moments he’s close enough for you to hear his heavy breathing.

yoongi heaves himself out of the cold, his shoulder screaming in pain, and then he is dripping in front of you. your boyfriend looks like a wet dog, the black hair plastered to his forehead as he steps forward. you can smell the sea salt across his drenched clothes.

the engagement ring screams from the bag to be acknowledged and yoongi is just… staring at you deeply.

“i had it all planned”, he whispers wringing his sweater. the gush of water drops on the deck, but the idol only looks at you. “weeks ago.” his fingers wrap around your writs, a silent plea to give the ring to its rightful owner – for now.

“i wanted to take you to the restaurant where we had our first date”, he admits and opens the bag. your first date had been a disaster – you’re still vividly remembering the food poisoning.

“then all the restaurants closed down; we were both so stressed… and… life went on”, yoongi continues as the ring dances between his fingertips. it looks like art without the plastic cheapening its presence.

“i... wanted it to be perfect.” his whispered words fall to the floor as he kneels in front of you. warmth is coloring your face, seeing your idol submitting to you.

“baby… you know how much i love you… how much you inspire me every day to become the best version of myself”, yoongi’s voice cracks against his words and you can’t help the softest coo from leaving your lips.

“i promise i’ll make you the best trophy wife of south korea.”

you snort as you hear boyish snicker from behind you at yoongi’s joke.

“will you spend the rest of my life with this ring on your hand?”, he asks and without waiting for an answer, he pushes the silver band on your finger. it fits perfectly.

“am i not supposed to agree first?”, you respond as your eyes stay on your future husband.

“oh baby, you agreed the moment you ate my burned pasta.” yoongi gets up and pushes a lose strand of hair behind your ears.

“you agreed the moment you moved in with me, a struggling insomniac.” his hands cradle your face, framing the expression of love between his palms.

“you agreed the moment you let me change your tampon because you were too drunk to move.” he gives you airy butterfly kisses.

“you agreed the moment you didn’t kill me for stealing your favorite ice cream from the freezer.”

“that actually was a close call”, you chime in, only to hear his soft chuckle.

“you agreed all those nights staying with holly in our shared bed while i traveled across the globe.”

a kiss is planted on the fresh scar across your temple. “you agreed all these moments where my depression was too much, where i was trapped in my own misery.”

a line of kisses travels to your mouth. mere millimeters from your lips he stills. “you do, right?”

under all the layers of love, confidence and familiarity, there is still a shy boy unsure of his worth. your smile is infused with giddiness as you close the gap, pressing your lips together in the softest kiss.

“i do”, you whisper in his mouth, only to meet his tongue with your own in a joyful dance. the boys around you are cheering, while the soft waves of the lake clash against the dock. you’re in pure bliss, kissing your wet fiancé fiercely.

and then you hear a loud thud, a wet slash on the wood. surprised, you both jump away a step – only to see a heaving seokjin lying flat on the deck, chest rising at a fast pace.

“i near- i nearly died for th-this engagement, ____. if – if i’m am not the be-best man, i’ll… will cast a spell on all- all yo-ur children.”

____

ah, this fic is crazy and totally not what i imagined it to become. i hope you enjoyed the read! there is only one chapter left (the stalker) – who’s excited for it? i hope you are doing well! to you, your family and/or loved ones i wish only the most festive time this week! love, dana

[blouisparadise]

Here is a list of amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of January. Between the third month of the Bottom Louis Fic Fest and all the other fics that authors posted throughout the month, it’s clear that this was a great way to start off the year of bottom Louis fics!  Happy reading!

1) Leave It All Here In This Bed | Explicit | 1071 words

One of Louis’s many sleepless nights.

2) Games Are Only Fun If You Win | Explicit | 1554 words

Louis and Harry have a bet. If Louis wins that means he's off laundry duty. If he loses well.

Let's just say Harry won't be complaining.

3) If It Makes You Feel Alive | Explicit | 1691 words

Louis is horny one night on the tour bus so he and Harry fuck while trying not to get caught by the others.

4) Beg Me Silently | Explicit | 2140 words

“So, your boyfriend…is he planning a magic night for you at home?”

Louis snorts. “He’s not, actually. He’s pretty hardworking, you see, so he comes home late.”

“Such a shame.” Harry walks towards Louis, so close that they’re sharing the same space. “You’re so beautiful, Louis. If you were mine, I wouldn’t make you wait for me.”

5) Birthday Wishes | Explicit | 2895 words

Note: This is part 3 of this series.

The one where Harry takes Louis to dinner for his birthday, and gifts him with a vibrating butt plug he wears to the restaurant. Fluffy birthday sex follows.

6) New Year, New Beginnings | Explicit | 3577 words

Note: This is part 4 of this series.

The one where Louis and Harry unexpectedly end up at the same New Year's party. Louis makes Harry jealous, and Harry shows him just how bad of an idea that is.

7) Heaven In These Sheets | Explicit | 3557 words

Bunny Hybrid Louis has it out for his boyfriend’s phone.

8) Pits Of Love | Explicit | 3934 words

Harry smells Louis' sweat for the first time after they've moved in together. His alpha goes a bit wild.

9) First Blow Hits You Cold | Explicit | 3986 words

Louis wears a shirt with a big ass H on it for his livestream, and Harry really, really likes it.

10) Close Your Eyes And Surrender To Me | Explicit | 4209 words

Note: This is the sequel to this fic.

Harry hummed and pressed his lips to Louis’ forehead. “I am very stressed, but I also know you’re stressed and tired too.” He glanced to Louis’ face seeing the confirming nod. “But, if you’re sure you’re up for it.” Harry smirked, waiting for Louis to say it was okay before he laid the boy down on the bed and hovered over him. “I really love this color on you. You look so pretty. Always do.” He spoke quietly, rubbing his hands over Louis’ soft thighs and moving them to his tummy. He then moved his hands up to Louis’ hair. It had been a while since Louis’ last haircut and it was now long enough that he could tie it up in little ponytails and even little braids. Louis currently had two hair clips in his hair. One was gold with little stars on it and the other gold with a moon. “I love your hair princess. Do you feel pretty?” He asked.

11) P Is For | Explicit | 4349 words

Note: The pairing for this fic is Louis/Pedro Pascal.

Louis and Pedro, winter in New York, a coffee machine, and bilingualism.

12) Pull Out Your Heart | Explicit | 5028 words

He wants to apologise, the five letters sit on the tip of his tongue but he does not. It means nothing to either of them.

13) Loving You's the Antidote | Explicit | 5070 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 302: Alpha Harry & Omega Louis are divorced but still spend each other’s heat/rut together because they only really trust each other but things get complicated when Louis (or Harry, author’s choice) spend it with someone else. Cue angst with a happy ending.

14) Sweet Talk With A Hint Of Sin | Explicit | 5095 words

“What the hell are you wearing?” Harry had the nerve to ask, and Louis bristled slightly.

“Well, what the bloody fuck does it look like?” Louis snapped, breaking his seductive demeanor momentarily because he was wearing this ridiculous get-up for Harry. He had thought that this would go over well.

And now that the moment was here, it was going anything but.

Harry’s brain seemingly malfunctioned, completely unbothered by the fact that he was now standing in an actual pool of red wine, or that there might even be broken glass directly next to his feet. He was focused solely on his boy splayed out on their bed. “Are those ears?”

“Yes,” Louis mumbled, reaching up to finger the burnt orange fur of the fox ears. “And a tail,” he said, shifting to lay on his stomach so that his perky ass was on display, showing the way his lube slicked hole had been prepped and was now hugging the impressively sized plug attached to the fox tail.

15) New York's Beauty | Mature | 5274 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 104: AU where Harry is an alpha wolf and Louis is a hybrid kitten. They were roommates. While they were arguing about something stupid, Harry wanted to bend Louis over the kitchen table and knot him right there. He slowly accepted his feelings and extreme desire for Louis, so he started to tease the hybrid until he would beg Harry to fuck him. They fall in love.

Louis needs to feel comfortable with the camera so harry fucks him until he is blushing and calm and gentle.

16) I Went Astray To Make It Okay And He Made It Easy | Not Rated | 5537 words

Note: This is a sequel to #17 on this list.

Harry makes sure to put on his blue truckers hat that has 'if you ain't a fisherman, you ain't shit' printed on it to hold back his hair out of his eyes. He remembers when he came home after buying it and Louis went on for days about much he looked like such a Dad. He made sure to fuck him hard that night and show him that he's a fucking DILF not just a Dad. 

17) You Make My Heart Beat Like The Rain | Explicit | 6611 words

Note: This is the prequel to #16 on this list.

"You're stunning, eh?" Harry whispers, his Canadian accent thick with lust. It usually slips out when he gets horny because he knows it turns Louis on. Harry presses his lips into the curve of his neck. His hot breath makes Louis shiver. He opens his eyes and sees Harry's bigger, tattooed arms wrapped around him, completely engulfing his smaller frame—and, fuck, maybe he is up for it.

Why does his boyfriend have to be such a fucking DILF? He blames it on a twitter thread he read a few weeks ago.

18) Baby, Let Me Love You Goodbye | Explicit | 6837 words

Harry and Louis are going through a divorce after being together for 10 years, so Louis comes over to collect his things, and, well…what’s a little goodbye sex, just one last time?

19) A Place To Call Home | Mature | 8113 words

The thing is, he’s pretty sure he’s found home in a person in his life, someone who’s been essential in everything he’s done since he was seven years old. Through every broken bone, through every breakup, through every failure; through every triumph, personal and professional, and every goal he has scored in his time in Man U, there’s been someone there for it all.

That’s his best mate. Harry. A twenty-two year old with the kindest heart known to man, a slow drawl that is entirely too endearing, with the dreams to open up his own flower shop. A quiet and earnest boy with those he doesn’t know, and open and honest and absolutely lovely with those he loves.

It all hits him, really, the night of their final game of the Premier League. Again, timing is not his forté. They’re gearing up, ready to hit the field for the second half against Liverpool that determines their ranking in the League, when his brain decides to come online (after seventeen years, apparently), and conveniently supply him with the revelation that oh yeah, you’re kind of in love with your best friend.

20) To Love Without Reason | Explicit | 8854 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

“Come on in, soldier,” Louis pats Harry’s chest and walks away, leaving Harry to follow behind.

Harry stands in the living room, looking around at Louis’ dwelling. Family pictures placed high on a shelf, certificates of Louis’ practice, and other trinkets that make Harry entirely too nostalgic.

“I have to warn you,” Louis says as he puts the kettle on, the water droplets from his hair trickling down the golden skin of his back. “The door jams if you lock it so you'll have to leave it ajar.”

Harry acknowledges with a soft hum, too entranced by Louis’ glistening skin to form a coherent reply.

21) It's A Game We Play In The Sheets | Explicit | 9426 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

“Louis is… He’s a boy I’ve been talking to.” He bit his lip, grin evident. “After I watched one of his videos during a Harry Reacts a few weeks ago I messaged him and…”

His sentence was cut short by the sound of a timid little “Hi” being whispered into his ears.

Harry closed his eyes for a second, pausing to take in the online presence of the real-life fairy, before he opened them and smiled. “Hey Lou. Ready to play with me?”

22) One Track Mind | Explicit | 9911 words

“You have a lot of friends, huh?”

Harry nods again. “A few.” The muscles of his bicep flex under Louis’ touch, and the alpha looks a bit drunk from the feeling, his eyes blinking slower and lips quirking at the corners. He’s leaning in, his alpha scent surrounding Louis from all sides.

“Mm,” Louis hums, squeezing his fingers tight, just to hear the sharp way Harry inhales. Then, when Harry is least expecting it, Louis returns the earlier sentiment—leaning up on his tiptoes and pressing his weight into Harry for balance, drawing his lips up close to Harry’s ear, and whispering, “Why don’t you go tell them goodnight.”

23) See You When I Get Home | Explicit | 10308 words

"What are you thinking about?" He repeats Louis' question from earlier.

"You." Louis' reply comes out in a moan. It shocks Harry, and his brain scrambles for the right thing to do, the right thing to say. He doesn't even know how to feel, or if he even heard Louis correctly.

"Me?"

24) Floating | Explicit | 10435 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

The one where Louis has control over water in every form but he doesn't know what to do with it. Harry is here to guide him.

25) I'm At Your Mercy Now (And I'm Ready To Begin) | Teen & Up | 10552 words

Where Louis' soulmark was leaked, Harry keeps his private. They're both famous popstars. Louis is waiting for his soulmate, Harry has a feeling it's him but Louis is completely oblivious.

26) You And I 'Till The Day We Die | Explicit | 10807 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 124: A fic inspired by Groupie Love by Lana Del Rey, where Harry is a Rockstar and Louis is his cute little boyfriend who tries to hide himself in the middle of the crowd. (Preferably set in the 80s)

27) Moonlit Sky Over Gentle Waters | Explicit | 11377 words

Harry left his hometown to sail the seven seas and returns seven years later, yearning for something — or rather, someone — that he isn't sure he can have.

28) Late Night Devil Put Your Hands On Me (And Never, Never, Ever Let Go) | Explicit | 11524 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Harry is a demon that feeds off of people’s nightmares. He finds his next meal in Louis’ dreams where he changes and molds them to become scary nightmares. Soon harry learns Louis is a lucid dreamer- he can act on his own in his dreams. They interact in the real world and have sex in the dream world. when the demon catches feelings for louis, he wants to live.

29) If You're Feeling Lonely | Explicit | 12807 words

The guest list is on the desk. Louis runs through it and stops a third of the way down, a familiar name catching his attention.

Harry Styles.

All he needs to do is confirm whether Harry Styles is the same Alpha whose scent left such a memorable impression on his body.

30) Want You To Play With Me | Explicit | 14335 words

"I'm quite not finished with you yet." Harry whispered right on the shell of his ears and squeezed the girth of his cock, making Louis shudder a sloppy puff of air as the tickling sensation ran through his spine, Harry was intoxicating. "Let me play with you a little more, Lou. I promise I'll give you what you want. Be my good boy, hm?" He slowly annunciated every word and licked a warm line on the nape of Louis' neck — Louis curled in his arms at that. Submitting himself a little bit more.

"Always wanna be your good boy." Louis whispered back and enveloped Harry's hand in his.

31) No Good Unless It's Real | Explicit | 17021 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis is a very busy farmer who’s just trying to make it to his next nap and Harry’s the new hot vet that’s determined to infiltrate every area of his life.

32) Tennis Court | Explicit | 18285 words

Louis and Harry are co-workers and Louis is sure Harry hates him because he always refuses to help him with his heats.

33) Joker Is Wild | Explicit | 18444 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 390: A reality show AU where Louis, Harry, Liam, Zayn and Niall are selected to stay at confined in a luxury mansion for 1 month, where they are required to have explicit, graphic sex at all times, like a porn Big Brother kind of show. Every week there are several different sexual tasks and trials that they must overcome together, which all ends in orgasms for all of them. When the boys all discover Louis is strictly a bottom, and a slutty one at that, they all can’t wait to get their hands on him. Bonus if other hot celebs are there too, like Shawn Mendes, for example. Includes lots of hard gay sex, rimming, blowjobs, gang bangs, ass worshipping (Louis ass, of course) and double penetration.

34) Baby, Let Me Love You Goodbye | Not Rated | 20249 words

Louis almost calls Harry daddy. Cue denial, feelings, and way too much dirty talk.

35) Give So Much (Not Enough) | Mature | 24610 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

“For my little lion,” Louis slid the smoothie bowl in front of Oscar, letting him dig in with his little hands. “And for daddy.”

He didn’t process the bowl in front of him, the push across the table causing a raspberry to roll off and fall on his lap, because Louis calling himself mummy may make him feel all sorts of mushy emotions, but Louis addressing Harry as daddy was suddenly having a very different effect on him. Since when did Louis saying daddy out loud render him speechless?

“Daddy’s still sleepy, but we’re up bright and early right Ossie?” Louis’ cooing shook him out of his daze. The man coughed, picking the raspberry off his lap and swallowing it with unintentional, and very unnecessary, eye contact with Louis. “Well, is it better than your protein smoothies and why?”

Harry chuckled, spooning another heap of the strawberry banana goodness into his mouth, “Way better sweetheart.”

A friends to lovers au with tons of mama Louis and domesticity.

36) Short And Sweet | Explicit | 29658 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis is a shy university student in a world scarce of male omegas. He's always dreamt of having an alpha despite his sheltered upbringing, fantasizing about being loved and cared for. He's immediately smitten by the mysterious alpha with curly hair, broad shoulders, and the addictive coffee scent.

37) Under Thorn And Bramble | Explicit | 31931 words

Note: The pairing of this fic is Louis/OMC. This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 445: A historical AU where Louis is working as a servant on a farm. The family that owns the farm is exceedingly cruel to him and he is often exhausted and in pain from his work. A mysterious stranger boards at the farm and is very intrigued by Louis, but Louis doubts his interest in genuine. Any pairing fine.

38) Pink In The Night | Explicit | 32324 words

His finger was tapping on Louis’ chat before Harry could even think about it, eyes reading over the last text he’d sent Louis. I miss you. Do you miss me?

Harry had felt so pathetic that December night, alone in the dark room of the Japanese apartment he’d been staying at, the strong smell of alcohol clinging to his clothes.

Louis hadn’t replied, but Harry wasn’t surprised; he had texted Louis a few times before while he’d been away, but there had never been a response.

It pained him to admit that this was their new normal.

39) Coeur De Pirate | Explicit | 34207 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

He tilts his chin up as the Captain strides across the deck, his footfalls falling loudly against the planks. The crew watches them from afar.

Stepping into his space, the Captain wraps an arm around Louis’ waist and pulls him in. He lowers his head to breathe his words against Louis’ cheeks. “I won,” he whispers, “I’ve come to claim my prize.”

40) If The Sun Don't Shine | Explicit | 36330 words

In a world where you meet your soulmates in dreams, Louis has spent the last three years going to bed hoping to finally meet his, only to end up disappointed time and time again. It all changes with a violin.

41) The Pirate And The Piper | Explicit | 38396 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

The one where Harry is Hook, Louis is Pan, and nothing is what it seems.

42) Begged And Borrowed Time | Mature | 40198 words

Prompt 60: Time travel AU where Louis somehow gets thrown back in time and ends up in the dark ages, during the reign of the Styles family.

43) I Ain’t Gonna Fence You In | Mature | 40645 words

Louis Tomlinson is a 18 year old city boy who is forced to spend his summer before his senior year at his aunts farm. There, he meets Harry, a 19 year old country boy his aunt hired to help around the farm.

Maybe the farm isn't the worst place to fall in love?

44) Don't Want No Other Shade Of Blue | Explicit | 43285 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Prompt 339: it was foretold that Alpha Prince Harry would be mated to a beautiful male omega with eyes that could rival the stone amethyst, but Omega Prince Louis refuses to believe it.

45) No Easy Choice, But You’re Mine | Explicit | 44963 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis is an omega hitman with one last job that goes a little sideways. Harry is the alpha bartender that looks a little too closely and cares a little too much.

46) Sedative Duty | Explicit | 46588 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Pop-star of the moment Louis Tomlinson is on his third-world tour. He decides to hire renowned professional dominant Harry Styles to unwind while on the road. In an effort not to raise suspicion by the crew, fans, and press, Harry pretends to be his bodyguard. He ends up being far more than that.

47) Just Always Be Waiting for Me | Explicit | 46837words

Note: Please be sure to check tags for any trigger warnings.

Harry Styles is a librarian at a private school who is not very devoted to his job but is very devoted to Louis Tomlinson, the resident English teacher, and has been ever since they met six years ago beneath a lonely streetlight.

Louis Tomlinson is a self confessed bookworm whose passion for Peter Pan, the literary classics and Harry Styles' happiness knows no bounds. He's self sacrificing, somewhat self loathing and haunted by a trauma he can't talk about.

Mutual pining abounds in this fic where a Peter Pan quote is never just a Peter Pan quote, caretaking is a love language and a platonic nude is never actually platonic. Louis has a kiss that belongs to Harry but he also has a painful past that might end up hurting them both.

48) Since The Future | Explicit | 48947 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

"It's done."

The words were barely above a whisper when they left Harry's mouth, but they hit Louis with the force of a freight train. It was done. Holy fuck. They had created a time machine. And tomorrow, they were travelling to the future.

49) Dirty Laundry Looks Good On You | Explicit | 50581 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

When Louis Tomlinson finds his clothes lying in a sad soapy mess on top of the washing machine in which they are supposed to be, he acts upon his anger and retaliates. What he doesn’t expect is having to deal with a six-feet tall, curly-haired and dimpled man in return, who seems to arouse confusing feelings within him and to make his life take an unexpected turn for the better (or worse?).

50) Hamartia | Explicit | 66970 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Six years is a long time for Louis to mend his heart back and erase every lingering, stubborn memory of his ex-lover, Harry Styles. But when news of the war being over spreads across the world like wildfire, and he stumbles upon the alpha he vowed himself to never see ever again, he realises that not even a lifetime will be enough for him to pick up the scattered, broken parts of his soul. He's far from expecting the alpha he loved to be struggling in the same way.

All the ointments in the world might never soothe the pain out, but it doesn't take long for them both to come to the conclusion that, maybe, the only medicine to their heartbreaks are what caused them in the first place.

51) Feeling Borrowed, Always Blue | Explicit | 68214 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

Louis has been dreaming of his wedding since he was young - he just never expected it to happen like this. words

52) Mind Over Matter (You Under Me) | Explicit | 73825 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest! Check out the full collection here.

It’s dark outside when Harry finishes practice for the day.

53) Rogue | Not Rated | 94992 words

Louis is a rogue Omega who's suffered through rejection and abuse for the biggest part of his life. He stumbles onto the Styles pack, quite possibly the kindness one he's ever met.

54) Chandeliers And Fake Smiles | Mature | 145010 words

On the brink of winning their first Grammy; up-and-coming rock band One Direction find themselves in the midst of the biggest scandal of their career - right before tickets for their world tour go on sale. in order to save their reputation, Louis Tomlinson must find it in his heart to forgive pop singer and heartthrob Harry Styles after his first impression rubbed him entirely the wrong way. after all, they cannot sell a relationship if it looks like they hate each other.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

[gxldenflower]

Stay Stay Stay (Bruce Banner x Reader)

NOTE: Originally posted on my ao3, supposedly_archer, on December 2nd, 2020. Both the summary and A/N are copied & pasted

Summary: Bruce watched as a name was written on his wrist, slowly and painfully. His soul mark had left his skin red, raw, and itchy. He sat there for the longest time, reading the name etched on his skin over and over. Y/N.

A/N: This is kinda messy ngl, but I had a lot of fun writing it!!!

Warnings: Age gap, little bit of angst

Word Count: 1,692

Tags: @9zoria9,  @thebookbakery

Gender Neutral Reader

Bruce hadn’t expected to meet his soulmate at a coffee shop.

To be honest he hadn’t expected to meet his soulmate at all.

He was working on one of his P.h.D’s when his soulmate’s name first appeared on his arm. Writing a paper on some subject he can’t even remember now when he felt a sharp, burning pain on the inside of his right wrist. It caused him to drop his pen on the floor and clutch his wrist with his opposite hand tightly.

Bruce watched as a name was written on his wrist, slowly and painfully. His soul mark had left his skin red, raw, and itchy. He sat there for the longest time, reading the name etched on his skin over and over. Y/N.

He knew that soulmates sometimes appeared later in life when their soulmate was born. But it normally happened when people were children, not when they were adults. The latest he had ever seen someone get their soul mark was in middle school.

For years, Bruce chose to ignore his soul mark. Covering up the name with long-sleeved shirts and wristwatches. It wasn’t unheard of for someone to not have a soul mark. And especially after the Hulk showed up in his life, he did his best to ignore it.

Whoever they were, wherever they were in the world, Bruce didn’t want them to get hurt. So, he hid away his soul mark from everyone. To protect them.

Only Tony knew, but of course Tony knows everything. “You do realize that you’re gonna have to face the music one day.” He had said to him one day out of the blue. Bruce had had his nose buried in an old SHIELD file.

Bruce looked up at Tony quizzically. “What do you mean, face the music?” Tony sighs and gestures with the spoon he was using to eat a cup of yogurt.

“Your soulmate. Those things work in mysterious ways, Bruce. You’re gonna meet them one day, and then what? It’s not like you can hide away from them.” Tony takes a final bite of his yogurt, and Bruce sighs.

“I’ll deal with it when I get there.” He mumbles, focusing his eyes back on the file.

Tony sighs. “It might be sooner than you think green bean.” He throws the now empty yogurt cup at Bruce’s head. It hits him gently on the forehead and drops to the floor. Bruce looks up and glares at him. Tony shrugs his shoulders, turning on his heel to exit the lab.

“Asshole,” Bruce grumbles under his breath, but Tony’s words had stuck with him. Fate always had a funny way of bringing soulmates together, no matter the circumstance.

Bruce looks down at his wrist, where his watchband covers the name Y/N. He takes off the watch and places it to the side. He runs his thumb over the black inscription repeatedly.

Over the years he had wondered what his soulmate was doing. Were they in school? Were they learning to drive? Were they thinking about him? Bruce knew exactly how old they were, he had been counting the days and years since his mark was first etched into his skin, even if he wasn’t doing it on purpose.

***

You quickly tie your apron behind your back as you exit the break room and walk into the main part of the cafe. You take your position behind the cash register, where a long line of customers is waiting.

You give the first patron your best customer service smile and apologize to him. You take his order and hand it off to the coworker that’s just appeared at your side. The next two and a half hours is a whirlwind of orders and customers as you try to keep up with the demand.

There’s eventually a lull of patrons and you lean against the counter and sigh. You glance at the watch on your wrist, but then you remember that the strap had broken suddenly last night, and you either needed to get it fixed or replaced.

Instead of gazing at the clockface as you normally do during work, you instead gaze at your soul mark. You had read it about a billion times during your life, even though it was an incredibly simple name. Bruce.

You had always imagined how you meet Bruce, your soulmate. A walk in the park, or a sudden run-in on the subway. But, you didn’t have any time to focus on that right now. You still had to finish school and find a decent paying job that wasn’t dealing with middle-aged mothers with bad haircuts.

You’re snapped out of your thoughts at the bell that signals a new customer. You smile at her as she makes her way to the counter. You take her order and hand it off to Bradley, one of your coworkers. The rest of your shift consists of the same ordeal. Taking orders and trying not to scream out loud.

After what felt like 3 days, you’re just about to untie your apron and take refuge in the break room when you hear the bell. You almost want to run off and pretend like you’re about to be sick, but something in the back of your head tells you to stay.

You smile at the man who’s just walked in. He has curly dark hair that’s graying at the sides and is dressed like he’s about to give a lecture at your college. He makes his way up to the counter and quickly looks up at the menu that hangs above and behind you before beginning his order.

It would’ve just been another order you’d immediately once the customer, but it was 6 coffees and 10 different types of pastries. You raised your eyebrows at him once he’s finished rattling off his order, and he lets out a mix of a sigh and laugh.

Your eyes meet for a moment, and you feel a sudden electrical zap in your wrist. You grab at it and by the way the man reacts you know he just had the same experience. You’re both rubbing at your wrists when you realize that it’s the wrist that has your soul mark written on it.

You lock eyes with the man and after an impromptu staring contest his eyes flick to your nametag where they stay focused. Your heart’s beating wildly in your chest and you look to the man’s, Bruce’s, wrist, but he has a watch on.

Everything that happened afterward was a mess of awkward introductions and trying to focus on whatever the hell he had just ordered. It was a blur of rushing to the break room to rip off your apron and rushing back out to where Bruce was now holding his numerous coffees and pastries.

It was a blur of exchanging numbers and trying your best to make plans to meet up at a better time. It was a blur of awkward goodbyes and Bruce almost dropping his box of pastries when he tripped on a crack in the sidewalk.

The next time Bruce saw you was more planned out, you met in a different cafe on a Friday that you both had off. Bruce had been taken aback by how easy it was to talk to you. It was like he had known you his whole life instead of just one week.

You had found yourself thinking the same thing. You had never been the most outgoing or charismatic person, but with Bruce, the conversation flowed naturally and it felt like you were in your own little window of time with him.

***

It didn’t feel like it had been a full year since you’d met your soulmate when you were laying on your couch in Bruce’s arms, back pressed against his chest, arms wrapped around you snuggly. To be honest, it felt like somewhere between a minute and an eternity.

You look up at him and smile, pressing a light kiss right underneath his chin. Bruce honest to God giggles at your show of affection, and you giggle back as you turn so your chests are pressed together and you can look him in the eye.

“Hi,” you whisper to him.

Bruce whispers back, “hi.” He lays a hand on the small of your back and begins tracing random patterns with his index finger.

“I love you,” you say to him, scanning his face. He smiles and places his other hand on your back.

“I love you too,” Bruce whispers back.

You sit in comfortable silence, basking in each other’s presence. You focus on Bruce’s heartbeat that you can feel beneath you and how your breathing has synchronized with his.

“Will you stay with me?” You ask Bruce quietly, breaking the silence. He quirks his head to the side, confused by your sudden question.

“I can stay the night if you want me to, angel, but I have work in the morn-“

You cut him off, “no. I mean like.” You bite the inside of your cheek and look away from Bruce’s face when you pause. “I mean like, forever.” Your last word is barely above a whisper, but Bruce can hear it loud and clear.

“If this is some marriage proposal, you know I can’t-“ he stops and begins to sit up, pulling away from you.

You sit up as well so you’re no longer touching and shake your head vigorously. “No, no, no. It’s not a marriage proposal, Bruce. Just, just a promise. A promise that you’ll stay with me.” You finally look up at Bruce, who has his brows furrowed tightly together, looking at you intensely.

After a beat of silence where all you can hear is your own heartbeat, he takes your hand in his and places his thumb on his name that’s inscribed on your wrist. “Of course I’ll stay with you, Y/N. I’ll stay as long as you'll let me.” You notice that his voice cracks at the end.

“Does that include forever?” You ask him quietly.

Bruce smiles at you and squeezes your hand tightly. “It includes forever, angel.”

[thenovelartist]

A Blanc Slate, Chapter 10

<Previous

28. Domesticity

The following months were hard, but that was to be expected.

The big difference was that Marinette was over at Adrien’s place far more often than not. Whether she was cooking for him, helping him try to keep his thoughts straight, or just working on her fashion commissions in the background, she was there. And while he did complain that he felt like he was taking advantage of her by depending too much on her, she constantly reassured him she didn’t mind. He was her partner and her friend, both in and out of the suit. Helping him get back on his feet was hard work but something she was more than willing to do.

Once, the thought popped into her mind that this was what the vow “in sickness and in health” meant. And while they were nowhere near thinking of marriage—heck, even a romantic relationship wasn’t even on the table at the moment—Marinette couldn’t help but think on it anyway. After all, she’d certainly had a plan to marry Adrien at one time in her life, and she can’t say she hadn’t considered what a life with Chat would have been like. And if a possibility of them being together surfaced in the near future…

She shook the thought from her head. This was no time to be thinking on things like romance and domesticity. That shouldn’t have even been on the table, even if her heart throbbed every once in a while in reminder that she did love the man she was taking care of. Her best friend and partner. No, now was the time to focus solely on helping him recover.

Which, much to Marinette and Adrien’s relief, he was.

It was a slow process, but his appetite had been returning. He’d been able to stomach more food as of lately and keep it down without looking green in the face.

The fog over his eyes had also cleared up for the most part, and he no longer walked around in a haze. The exhaustion still persisted, and his mind still wasn’t fully on point again, but with the progress he had been making, Marinette was sure they regulate in no time.

And she was extremely thankful for it.

29. Roses

“That… is a lot of roses.”

Marinette couldn’t help but gawk when she entered Adrien’s house. She’d been given a key back before he’d even revealed himself to be Chat, back when she had forced herself into the role of Adrien’s caregiver. He’d given it to her one day out of exhaustion of the “game” she played, one titled “I do not care if I stand at your door for an hour, I will knock every thirty seconds until you open the door.” So, an agreement had been reached she’d always come over at a certain time and let herself in to check in on him.

Currently, the boy in question was nowhere to be seen. Instead, she was left staring at a large bouquet of deep red roses speckled with brilliant white lilies in a glass vase tied off with a lovely pink ribbon. In the middle of the bouquet was a glittery plastic stick that held a card that read “Marinette” on the front of it. It was a stunning sight.

Where did you even get those, Adrien?

And why?

After putting her purse down by the front door, she walked over to pluck the card off the stick, carefully opening the back and pulling out the pink card. Inside was a familiar handwriting, one that was steady now after months of recovery.

Marinette,

I don’t even know where to begin. I guess with a thank you. Thank you for everything. From staying by my side as Marinette and caring for me to insisting I’m still your partner as Ladybug and refusing to let me go to every other thing in between.

While these flowers don’t even put a dent into the debt I owe you, I felt they were a great place to start. Something beautiful for someone beautiful. I want to say that I’m ready to spend the rest of my life by your side paying you back, but that’s likely getting to ahead of myself. I have been in love with you for years, as you know, and have confessed my love to you as Chat multiple times. My love for you is still true, even though I know you’ve drawn your lines.

Maybe I’m reading too much into this and only seeing what I want to see, but lately, it feels as though those lines aren’t as hard as they used to be. Or maybe I’ve just gotten Nightingale Syndrome bad for you. Either way, I want to take the chance and put myself in your debt a little more by selfishly asking you to let me take you out on a date.

If your answer is no, I’m prepared for that. I never want to pressure you into something out of responsibility for me or out of guilt. I will still stand by your side as your partner and friend, forever.

But if your answer is yes, it would be one more thing of the countless you’ve done for me that I will be eternally grateful for.

Forever yours, in whatever way you’ll take him,

Adrien

When she finished reading, her hands fell to the table, letter still clutched in them as she tilted her head upwards in a vain attempt to keep the tears at bay. “Don’t cry,” she warned herself.

But even then, she knew it was too late.

With a beaming grin, she looked down at the card once more, scanning over the contents yet again. She only looked up again when she caught movement out of the corner of her eye.

Adrien, looking better than she’d seen him in the five months since she’d taken his ring, was leaning against wall. He’d somehow cleaned up with a haircut—how he had managed to keep an appointment like that a secret from her was beyond her but also gave her confidence that he was feeling well enough to manage on his own again—shaved, and dressed up in a pressed button down, a vest, and slacks. His eyes were now clear, clear enough for her to see the fragile hope shining in them, even from across the room.

With a smile she couldn’t suppress is she tried, she dropped the card on the table, scurried over to him, and threw her arms around his neck. He caught her easily, no longer unsteady or requiring the assistance of a wall or other solid object, and held her tight.

“Yes, I’ll go out with you.”

She felt the tension leave his shoulders as he squeezed her tighter, clinging to her like a lifeline. “I thought I was might have been asking too much or springing that on you too suddenly.”

“No!” she quickly assured. “I mean… it was sudden, but I don’t mind. Not at all.”

He sighed with relief. “Good. Good; I’m glad.”

She giggled. “You’re not normally so speechless.”

He chuckled awkwardly. “You have no idea how terrified I was of your answer.”

“You? Mr. Confess-on-a-daily-basis was scared?”

“Of this one, yeah. I think this was the scariest confession to date.”

Worried, Marinette pulled away a bit, just so she could face Adrien and meet his gaze. “Really?”

He nodded. “Yeah. Because this time… it felt like I really had the most to lose compared to any other time I’ve confessed. You’ve seen the worst of me, and you’ve faced my darkest side. You could have easily said no now that you knew that about me.”

Pursing her lips, Marinette considered his words. “The thing is… I… don’t mind,” she eventually sputtered out. “Because I’ve seen you at your worst, and yet I also know there’s no one else I’d rather be with. There isn’t anyone in this world who doesn’t have that hidden ugly side of them. But yours doesn’t scare me in the slightest.”

To say Adrien was speechless was an understatement. For a moment, he gaped like a fish on land before he finally grinned, letting loose a chuckle before blinking away tears in his eyes.

Marinette was quick to cup his cheek, gently swiping away the tears. Adrien reached up, laying his hand over hers. “Well,” he murmured. “Guess I really can’t let you go now, can I?”

Marinette grinned, her own eyes prickling with tears. “Who said I was going to let you let me go?”

“Fair enough,” he said, grin growing. “You’re stubborn like that. I should know by now you’re way too stubborn to let me go.”

“You better believe it.”

30. Trust

It had been one year since the day Adrien’s father’s mansion had caught fire, and although Adrien had officially been cleared of suspicion of killing his father, the public was still skeptical of anything involving the Agrestes, especially with Nathalie Sancour having suddenly and mysteriously passed as well.

After struggling with the company for a year, it had officially dissolved and Adrien was finally able to be free of that burden. Yet, the burden of guilt still weighed on him.

“We’ve been over this,” Marinette assured. At the moment, Adrien was laying across her lap while she gently stroked his hair, a habit both of them had come to enjoy very much. “It was an accident. You fought your dad as Adrien and ran, but then went back as Chat when you thought he was out of the house so you could snag the book that wasn’t even there. You ended up pushing him off you when he tried to choke you out. The fact he fell and cracked his head open on a fallen statue was not your fault, nor was it your fault a fire started.”

“I still don’t know what happened,” Adrien muttered. “I don’t think he had any candles lit. I thought I heard glass break, so did a lightbulb break and send sparks flying? Or maybe he was cooking in the kitchen and something happened there? I really don’t have any clue.”

“See? So you can calm down. It was all in self-defense. Don’t feel bad for Nathalie, either. You were the one that called an ambulance for her when she suddenly collapsed.”

“I realized why she did,” Adrien said. “Same reason my mom collapsed. They each had the same symptoms, and they both wore the peacock miraculous. It was likely broken the same as my ring.”

Marinette’s hand stilled in his hair. “They what?”

Adrien froze, his body suddenly becoming stiff. “Did I not tell you?”

“No!” she cried. “Excuse you, but when did you come to this revelation?”

“I really never said anything?” Adrien asked, panicking as he scrambled to sit up so he could meet her eyes. “I swore I did!”

“No, you did not.”

With a groan, Adrien rubbed his hands down his face. “I’m so sorry.”

Marinette sighed. “Well, at least I know now. I’ll be sure to work on that one next.”

“Sorry.”

“You’re fine,” she dismissed. “I guess it’s understandable considering how out of it you were. There were days you did not know left from right.”

“I’ll take any excuse you let me have,” he said with a sigh, still looking disheartened. Marinette was sure that if he was transformed as Chat, his ears would have been drooped low.

Cute.

“On that same note, how is the ring coming along?” he asked. “I know you’ve been working hard. Have you made any headway?”

A grin suddenly spread across her face as a sudden urge to tease him struck her. “Oh? Did I not tell you?”

His eyes almost got misty as he pouted at her. “I said I was sorry.”

“I am, too,” she continued. “Because otherwise, I would have already told you I fixed it.”

Adrien’s eyes nearly bugged out of his head as his jaw dropped. “Y-you did?”

“No.”

She laughed at the sudden shift in his expression, his hope being squashed as he glared at her, completely unamused. “You are cruel, ‘bug.”

Her laughter subsided as a warmth spread though her. “Did I also mention I’m really glad you started using that nickname again?”

His previous irritation faded as he returned her smile with one of his own. “I won’t lie: I missed saying it.”

“I’m up for hearing it for as long as you’re up for using it.”

“Good, because I don’t intend on dropping it any time soon.”

“I’m really glad to hear it,” she said. “For that, I think you deserve a reward.”

“Kiss?” he inquired excitedly.

A warmth blossomed on her cheeks as she giggled. “Well, that wasn’t what I had in mind, but I’d be willing to give you one of those, too. First, close your eyes.”

“Only one?”

She rolled her eyes. Kisses rarely stopped at one. She was very much okay with that, though. “Fine, two. Now, just close your eyes.”

He shut them, but then immediately cracked open one to steal a peek at her. “What do you have planned?”

“Just trust me.”

He shut his eyes all the way. “You know I do.”

“I do,” she confirmed. With that, she took his hand in hers before sliding a ring from her pocket onto his hand.

She didn’t get the ring halfway on his finger before he looked down at his hand in shock. “My ring.”

“Yeah,” Marinette said, lacing their fingers together. “I really did fix it. It took a lot of trial and failure, though.”

“How…?” He stared at his hand in awe before turning to look at her, then turning back to his ring.

She shrugged. “Magic and time. I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to fix the peacock in no time after this experiment.”

She swore she saw tears in his eyes. Whether he did or not, she still reached up to cradle his cheek.

“Hey,” she said. “Promise me one thing?”

His green eyes locked to hers, and she swore her breath caught in her throat at the intensity in them. “Anything.”

“Next time you have a problem like this, one so big your emotions get too much for you to contain, come to me first, and don’t push me away.”

She was right; he did have tears in his eyes, because at her words, they began to fall.

He grasped her hand tightly. “I promise,” he said, nuzzling her palm. “We’re partners, and I promise that I’ll trust you to be my partner and help me through the next time anything like this happens. But I just hope there won’t be any more surprises like that. Once is enough, and I learned my lesson.”

He meant it. Marinette could tell by his tone and gentle expression and the way he held her hand: tightly as though he was afraid to let go.

“I’m really glad to hear it,” she said, her heart fluttering as a warm, fuzzy feeling floated through her. “Now, I believe I promise you a kiss.”

“Two,” Adrien said, reaching up to cradle her cheek while he leaned closer. “You promised me two.”

“I doubt you’ll be able to stop so easily.”

“Since when do I ever?”

“Touché.”

31. Soulmates

His black suit never looked so good.

“Well, well, Chat Noir,” Marinette purred, leaning against the railing of her balcony with a cattish grin. “I thought you said I wasn’t going to see you again.”

“Unexpected surprises do happen, Princess,” he returned, shooting her a wink as he took a seat on the railing.

“And it’s such a purr-leasure to see you in your black suit.”

His own cattish grin widened. “For your purr-usal, princess,” he said with a wink.

Oh, how wonderful it was to have her cat back. She’d even keep up the stupid puns for him. “Hmmm, I sur-paws that you’re the cat’s meow.”

Dramatically, he threw a hand over his heart—

And nearly fell off the railing.

“Chat!” Marinette snatched his wrist, catching him in case he couldn’t catch himself, which he thankfully did.

“Heh, uh… looks like it’s gonna take a little more time before this cat can land on its feet one hundred purr-cent of the time again.”

“Not funny.”

“Relax, Marinette,” he said, sliding off the railing and onto the balcony so he could stand in front of her and wrap her up in his arms. “I’m almost totally back to normal.”

“Don’t push it,” she warned. “I still worry about you.”

“I won’t.”

“You almost did.”

“We were having a good time with my pun-hating girlfriend throwing them back at me. How could I not be awestruck and caught up in the moment.”

She snorted in amusement. “Well, the fun and games end when my kitty takes a fall he can’t recover from.”

He sighed, propping his chin on her head and beginning to purr, settling her down.

“That’s unfair,” she muttered, happily snuggling into his embrace. “You know I like your purrs.”

“I know you do. And it’s only fair for me to take responsibility for every heart attack I give you.”

She grinned. “I’ll hold you to that.”

“I’m more than happy to,” he assured.

With a sigh, Marinette relaxed completely against him, grinning like the lovesick girl she was. She was more than content to play around with him, but she was more than content to snuggle, too.

“Have I told you today how much I love you?” he asked, smile audible in his words.

“I think you have, but I’m always happy to be reminded.”

“Let’s see… I love you more than my cat puns.”

She gasped. “Impossible.”

“I know it seems that way,” he teased. “But it actually is possible, if you can believe that.”

“I’m not sure I can.”

He chuckled. “Well, let me put it this way: puns are the bread and butter of my life. But you’re my other half, and I really can’t live life to the fullest without you.”

“But you need bread and butter to survive. So wouldn’t they be more important?”

“They are an inherent need. I didn’t choose the pun life; the pun life chose me.”

She snorted, burying her face against him to hide her growing grin. “You’re such a dork.”

“Yes yes, I am. I’m a package deal, but you seem to accept that.”

“I do.”

“Which I’m so glad for,” he continued. “Because as I was saying, unlike the puns, I chose you. You came into my life and completed me in ways I didn’t realize I needed to be completed, and if you disappeared, I would be only half the person I once was.” He pulled away just enough to look down at her, his joking tone gone in favor of a serious one. “You’re my soulmate, and the biggest blessing I have ever received. And I’m so so thankful for you.”

Her heart felt like it could burst from her chest. “I love you, too, my kitty. You purr-fect me.”

He grinned, his green eyes shining and his expression seeming to brighten the night. “That was a good one.”

She giggled. “I learned from the best.”

[romanceboys]

(interview) w korea september issue 2020 — reptile

1. i was surprised to learn that this is your 13th year since debut. within a company, the years almost reflect the experience of a vice department head. that’s right. though there are things i’m seeing for the first time at this point, i think there’s a lot that has remained the same. shall i tell you something funny? early in the year, i transformed into my debut appearance from when i was 16 with a bowl haircut and had my picture taken. i put it up on instagram and as i watched my fans briefly mistake it for an old picture, i thought to myself ‘well at least my face hasn’t aged much yet.’ haha. 2. today, i get to meet one of the personalities i’ve been very curious about personally. how should i put it, you seem like a person who possesses a perfect narrative. oh my, thank you. 3. maturing steadily after debuting with shinee in middle school, you broke away from your image as the group’s youngest and instead donned the clothes of a solo musician. all 5 of your solo albums have been recorded as hits. now you are a member of superm that has gone global. even a narrative within a coming-of-age novel could not be as sturdy as this.  when i look back on my life, i find it quite fascinating. i entered the company at the age of 13, and this year i turned 28. i’ve lived half of my life as a singer, i realise this when i think ‘i’ve run along the same path for a long time’. i think... i’ve been very greedy. it was through this greed that i was able to debut in a team called shinee, and consequently receive solo plans. once, producer lee sooman told me to bring him a recording of any pop song. wondering ‘what’s going on?’ i prepared for it and submitted, and soon after my solo album was released. thinking back, it must’ve been a test. i felt a sense of accomplishment in these things. that too very deeply, of course luck was on my side too. 4. a methodical company like sm couldn’t have proposed a solo career so lightly. there were a couple of tell-tale signs as far as i could tell. my singing parts were little during debut. after all taemin had the image of the one in charge of dancing. then my parts started to increase gradually, this could’ve been one of the signs. back in the day i used to stay back in the practice room till dawn. the employees working late would see me and the word probably went around. they must have felt sorry for me. a skinny boy practising by himself till dawn (laughs). 5. were you the type to stay back later than the rest in the practice room? i would go to the practice room as soon as we wrapped up our schedule. i’d practice till sunrise then return to the dorm and prepare for the next schedule immediately, i spent a long time doing this. 6. it was at the time of ‘sherlock’ in 2012 that your stage presence started to shine in shinee’s stages. thereafter, it seemed that you enjoyed your time on stage thoroughly. when did you begin to realise that only you were in command of your own stage? there were a couple of times... sherlock was one of them. sherlock was an album that came out when i was 20, right after becoming an adult, it was then my attitude towards performance changed. in those days i challenged myself to ‘not to do what was expected/fixed.’ usually our gestures at certain sections of the song are fixed beforehand, from sherlock onwards however i tried my hand at different things without reserve. it was my way of approaching the audience with sincerity, and my way of improving in the future. back then i would notice variations (in my performance) everyday when i monitored myself. 7. frankly, isn’t it difficult for someone to have made such a prominent leap? i think it might have been because of the long hiatus before sherlock. i was able to prepare well so my growth was likely more obvious when i stood on stage after a long time. how should i put it, my members were very stimulating for me. since the hyungs aren’t ordinary people (laughs). this is something i’m confident about, even if you say that most of the shinee members are main vocalists, none of us is inferior to the other, everyone is so talented. with these thoughts verbatim ‘i must survive in here,’ ‘i need to finish what i started,’ i practiced. i couldn’t not have made the leap with such stimulation and not to mention my greedy nature (laughs). spending time together with the members made me realise that we started to resemble each other in some aspects, thanks to them i was able to broaden my perspective and become aware of my undiscovered talents. 8. the prologue single ‘2 kids’ of your third album ‘never gonna dance again’ released in august. as i was listening to the song, i suddenly became curious about the lyricist and looked them up. my impression was that the language of the lyrics was raw and honest. the lyricist turned out to be you. my intention was to include everyday, colloquial speech. i’ve written poetic and abstract lyrics before, but while working on ‘2 kids’ i wanted the listeners to easily grasp the emotions at once. since i’ve released many songs like ‘danger’ with vivid concepts and sensual performances, i expected there to be some distance between me and the public. i found that i shouldn’t stray too far. in any case, i’m a pop singer. i thought to myself let’s meet the public halfway, and the result was the lyrics for ‘2 kids.’ it’s the brightest of all my title tracks (laughs). 9. i find two interesting points here. first, you are completely aware of your identity as a pop singer, second, to do that you work hard to keep close to the public. of course there are times when it doesn’t work out (laughs). for instance, when we’re deciding on the title track for a shinee album, my opinions always diverge from the members’. after listening to our fourth album title track ‘view,’ i said ‘no way, it can never be this!’ (laughs). what i’m after is, how shall i put it... there is a side to me that wants to experience things profoundly. for example, if i were to express love, instead of depicting it one-dimensionally, i’d prefer to do it maniacally. i like taking it one step further to appear twisted.  10. that’s amusing. it’s probably because i’ve seen your easy-going appearance on tv a lot, i would have never guessed for you to approach things ‘deeply’. profound people tend to be like that. ‘multi’ people are able to do several things at once, i can’t do that. i have to dig into things deeply at a time. that’s why when my members and i receive the same schedule notice, i’m the only one who always forgets it (laughs). 11. oho, this makes me curious about your taste in pop culture.  i really like the british drama <black mirror>. i get hooked on the unusual. like mind-boggling things? i used to watch movies that weren’t popular because such movies are less likely to repeat contents that have already been consumed. but then i slowly began to enjoy light films as well. these days i leave a movie running in the background while i do other things. back when i would look for an independent film or thriller of my liking, i’d get extremely exhausted after watching it. they require so much focus that they sap my energy. 12. we were talking about lyrics but somehow ended up here (laughs). if you were given the opportunity to write lyrics again, what kind of story do you want the lyrics to convey? i like philosophical lyrics. for instance, a song called ‘soldier’ from my solo album deals with religious content, it varies from time to time of course but well if i were to write again... i think about this a lot these days. i want to change myself, i want to shake off my image uptil now and be reborn again. 13. why is that? i want a colour that is more concentrated and unique. as if i'm debuting again, i want to show something completely new that i had not before. 14. but aren’t your comebacks always novel? a musician like you who does diverse and experimental concepts is rare. is that so? sure the concepts are always new but... these days i think about how i want to change myself as a person from the very inside. instead of putting a facade on display, i have a thirst for wanting to show a more humane, genuine appearance. all humans experience moments of weakness and dysfunction. i think these moments definitely hold some beauty in them. the moment a person breaks down. it’s the only way one can get up and overcome difficulties again, i believe showing these sides of me, all of me, unabashedly is a path i need to walk as an artist now. 15. honestly, i’m excited for your third album because i heard this album reflects your ideas the most. what aspects of the production were different this time? firstly, i personally cast and liaised with the music video director. i thought it was important to work with the director one-on-one by keeping mediators to a minimum. through several meetings we mulled over every single thing like concept, outfit, hair and makeup. i offered my opinions too: ‘because i’m thinking of leaving a connecting link in the prologue, since there are two albums that would release following ‘2 kids,’ i want to drop certain keywords in the music video.’ fans usually call this a ‘bait’ (laughs). 16. the choreography stood out the most in the ‘2 kids’ music video. you weren’t simply moving to the rhythm, rather weren’t you moving your body guided by emotions? actually there were barely any plans to include dancing scenes. but i thought you never know so i quickly prepared a choreography the day before i left for paris. initially, i had a ‘dramatised’ (borrowing elements from drama) choreography in mind, but the director was expecting something modern. in the end, we expressed it well with a choreography that the director and i came up with after finding the perfect common ground. 17. personally i think a dramatised choreography would have been quite alright because ‘2 kids’ is a universal love song. i told the director i wanted to look miserable and pathetic through and through, like falling into a bottomless pit, wrecked, to be found waking up in the middle of the street, that would do too. why did i want to be that wrecked? i don’t know. there’s just a lot that exists within me. and i might have wanted to express that.... 18. with your first solo mini album <ace> you proved your grit as a solo musician to the public, and i believe your second album <move> reified your colour. i think taemin is a musician who doesn’t need to prove himself anymore. having reached this status, you’re releasing your next album <never gonna dance again>. did you ever think that this album could be it? rather, i hope that this album can be my ‘turning point.’ just as how it was during sherlock, i hope this time it changes my identity completely, as an individual and as a performer. people might like this album or find it mediocre, but i try not to care about these things now. 19. were you the type to stress over feedback? yes. because there are many people who are uncomfortable with change. but then i realised we’d never be able to free ourselves from within if we continued to be tied down. so now i’m trying to notice these things less. 20. have you ever had this thought? that looking back, the experimental has always revolved around you. as i said before, i think there is a lot of something within me (laughs). people have recognized that, there’s a lot i want to do. there is a greed for wanting to be different from others. it’s not that i want to ‘appear’ different but truly be different. 21. do you think there is an aspect of you that others can’t follow? i can’t seem to figure it out. i’m looking for it. however, my satisfaction level with myself tends to be low. and it’s something that has been guiding me till now. 22. what helps you recharge the most? i like lower-body bathing so much (laughs). as soon as i get into the bath, i automatically end up going ‘euu’ ‘aah.’ i soak my body completely, light up a scented candle, then let my body warm up like this. 23. while watching your vlog-like youtube content taem-log, i wondered ‘does he have an affinity for household goods?’ since the camera often captured your surroundings, i noticed pretty glasses and a colourful coffee machine adorning your cupboard. not at all. my mother did all of that (laughs). she’d say ‘this would suit taemin~’ then set it up prettily for display on the shelves. sometimes i do think i’d like to furnish my house with antiques if i were to move in the future. this is a bit funny but i find the houses in old horror movies so pretty. 24. i saw a bottle of moët & chandon in your refrigerator, is champagne your regular choice of alcohol? i rarely drink. i usually receive gifted alcohol quite a lot, it all goes to my father (laughs). my mother brought the moët & chandon and left it in there. i asked her to leave a pretty bottle in there at least for decoration purposes, so she probably brought it just for that? (laughs). 25. what kind of a person is 28-year-old taemin? i sort of want to set things ablaze. i want to put up a spectacular finale of the opening act. 26. how do you want to be remembered as a musician? as a great person. i say this knowing it sounds a bit grandiose but it’s my mission.  27. i can see it. the bigger you become the larger the impact you can have on society. i will become that person. so that many people can hear the message i want to convey.

translated by romanceboys — take out with full credit (source)

[lifeofclonewars]

Intro to the Extended Fett Clan (WKatMAM)

I’m doing this so I don’t have to take an unnecessarily long amount of time during Part 4 to explain the whole family to everyone. I get my second Covid shot tomorrow, so hopefully Chapter One will be up soon. Enjoy!

Clan Leaders

Nielsen Fett: Better known as 99 in canon, Nielsen goes by NiNi or ba’buir with his grandkids. He’s a farmer, and hosts the Annual Fett Family Reunion every year. Married to Kamino. Father to Lynx, Courey, Wolffe's mom (no, I'm not revealing her name yet), Alfred (Alph), Charisma, Arla, and Jango. Grandpa to all the kids who will be listed. 

Kamino Fett: I say screw the Kaminoans by naming the matriarch of this au after their home planet and making her love her family no matter what happens. She was a baker, passed away from old age two years before this au takes place. Used to have those grandma glasses-on-a-chain. Was blonde. Mother to Lynx, Courey, Wolffe's mom, Alph, Charisma, Arla, and Jango. Her grandkids call her KamKam or ba’buir.

Subclan One (aka some of the Commanders)

Lynx Fett: The oldest of the next generation of Fetts. He's a vet. Has a full goatee. Married to Nala Se. Father to Bly, Gree, Ponds, Keeli, Colt, and Zariza. Grandpa to Colette. More lax on his kids than his wife. Good dad, poor choice in women.

Nala Se: Geneticist (obviously lol). Very strict because "Lynx is too lax on their kids" (he's not). Mother to Bly, Gree, Ponds, Keeli, Colt, and Zariza. Grandma to Colette. Few people in the family actually like her.

Bly Secura-Fett: 27, Kindergarten teacher. Married to Aayla, father to Colette. Oldest of the next generation of Fetts/the cousins. You might recognize his username from the previous parts, Old Man Dad Bly. Ponds was the one to set it to that. Bly doesn't care enough about it negatively to switch it.

Aayla Secura-Fett: 26, Ryl Translator. Married to Bly, mother of Colette. Known for wearing her hair in braids. She's not in the cousin chat but Bly's constantly showing her screenshots of it and she enjoys it.

Colette Secura-Fett: Almost 1, a Blyla baby! So far clings to Bly more than Aayla, but that may change. Gets lots of love and snuggles from the extended fam.

Gree Fett: 25, biologist. Second oldest of the subclan and of the cousins. Still has that haircut but mainly out of spite of his brothers instead of in honor of them this time. Chat Name: Green Man.

Pontius “Ponds” Fett: 23. He’s working to be an architect, but is currently stuck with a job he’s over-qualified for in the meantime. Known in the chat as Lakes because he thinks he’s funny sometimes. Most likely to start something in subclan one, least likely to be blamed for it... most of the time.

Keeli Fett: 21, cosmetologist. He took a different route than his brothers and went to trade school instead of a 4-year university and consequently got a job before Ponds did. Best hair in the family. Debating whether or not Gree’s haircut is a good enough reason to disown him lol. Chat Name: Keeling Over.

Colt Fett: 17, just finished his junior year of high school. Working a minimum wage summer job to help save for college. Met his best friends Havoc and Blitz in kindergarten; they all work at the same place now. Chat Name: Neigh.

Zariza Fett: 15, just finished her freshman year of high school. Only daughter in the subclan, which is both a blessing and a curse with Nala for a mom. Wants to be a photographer, has taken pictures throughout the reunions the past few years for NiNi. Has lots of blackmail on everyone as a result. Chat Name: Zzzzzz.

Subclan Two (aka the Coruscant Guard)

Courey Fett: Second oldest of his generation of Fetts. He’s a bartender (and owner), and the loudest and most rambunctious of his siblings. Full beard. Married to Slyvia Fett. Father to Fox, Thorn, Jek, Rys, and Corsica. His name is vaguely based on me misspelling Coruscant many many times in the past.

Slyvia Fett: You thought Nala Se was an interesting choice in mom? This lady is a super successful but shady businesswoman. Nobody knows the specifics and they’re not sure they want to know. Also kinda strict, but she’s also not home often enough for it to make too much impact. Married to Courey, mother to Fox, Thorn, Jek, Rys, and Corsica. She has dirty blonde hair, which two of her kids inherited when it combined with the rare blond Fett gene. Vaguely based on Sly Moore.

Fox Fett: 19, just finished his freshman year of college. Perpetually tired because of homework, actual work, and the projects he choses to do. Two days older than Wolffe and reminds him often. Actually best friends with Wolffe. They go to the same university. Like Wolffe, loves his siblings but is loath to admit it. Causes more trouble than people think. Chat Name: Think Outside the Fox.

Thorn Fett: 16, just finished his sophomore year of high school. Older of the two dirty-blonds in the sub-clan. Second oldest blond of the cousins after Rex. Suspicious in how he’s so optimistic when he grew up with Fox for a brother haha. Occasionally likes to stir up trouble in the chat, especially since he’s the one who made it. Chat Name: Thorn in Your Side.

Jek Fett: 11, just finished fifth grade. His best friend is Thire. Too young for the chat, not too young to cause trouble. Like all little brothers, switches between ignoring Fox and Thorn and always trying to get their attention. Like all middle children, turns it around and also picks on Rys and Corsica for the same things Fox and Thorn use on him. 

Rys Fett: 8, just finished second grade. Current goal in life is to catch Fox sneak-attacking him just once. Tags along with Jek most of the time, sometimes to bug him, sometimes because he thinks he’s cool. Also too young for the chat.

Corsica Fett: 7, just finished first grade. Only daughter of subclan two. The second of the dirty blonde haired kids in this subclan. Hangs out with Unique a lot at family reunions. Has the art of bugging her brothers at the most inconvenient times down. Already learning to blackmail people. Name lightly based on the correct spelling of Coruscant. Also too young for chat.

The Koons (aka our MCs! The Wolfpack)

Plo Koon: My favorite space dad haha. I think you get the gist by now. Get ready for some more puns! Definitely the type of dad to wear a fanny pack. His sunglasses are probably just transition glasses that switch too easily and he just never told anyone lol. Actually, I never mentioned it, but he’s also a social worker.

A[redacted] Koon: Our boys’ mom. Married to Plo, though she died giving birth to Comet. Twin to Alfred. Her name is a surprise for later, so here’s her first initial, at least. Used to wear glasses or contacts, depending on the day.

Wolffe Koon: 19, just finished his freshman year of college. The star of the show lol aka our pov character. Loves his brothers but rarely admits it out loud. Best friend is Fox and is going to use that to his advantage for blackmail this reunion. Cousin Chat Name: Werewolf? There Wolffe! Subclan Chat Name: Howl are you? Wolfpack Chat Name: Grr.

Boost Koon: 15, just finished his freshman year of high school. The only person in the family who likes Gree’s haircut. His maroon hair is starting to grow out now. It may or may not be his turn to get lost this time... Chat Name: T-Mobile. Subclan Chat Name: Ghosty Boi. Wolfpack Chat Name: Booster Seat.

Sinker Koon: 13, just finished seventh grade and it shows. His silver hair is also starting to grow out. Gonna cause some chaos, since he’s close in age to many of the Fett cousins. Chat Name: Banana Sink. Subclan Chat Name: Hook, Line, and— Wolfpack Chat Name: Stinker. (No, it hasn’t been changed back yet.)

Comet Koon: 10, just finished fourth grade. Still obsessed with penguins. Also gonna cause some chaos with some of the cousins. Koon most likely to get hurt during the reunion by climbing on and jumping off things he shouldn’t. Also too young for the chat.

Subclan Three (aka Cody + the 501st)

Alfred “Alpha” Fett: Twin to A, younger by 5 minutes and never talks about it. Married to Sevannah. Father to Cody, Rex, Fives, Echo, Tup. Owns a gym named Triple A. Used to be a personal trainer, which is how he met Sevannah. Technically the middle child of his siblings.

Sevannah Fett: Professional and Olympic archer. Married to Alph, mother to Cody, Rex, Fives, Echo, Tup. Yes, her name comes from seventeen as in “Alpha-17.″ (Maybe not) surprisingly, the more in shape out of her and Alph since she’s still competing lol.

Kote “Cody” Fett: 18, just graduated high school. Planning on attending college for sports management. Twin to Rex (he’s older by 7 minutes). Got his scar while playing football or something, I’m not really sure. Any Ghost member you can think of is probably his friend. Chat Name: *hacker voice* I’m In.

Rex Fett: 18, just graduated high school. Planning on being an athletic trainer. Twin to Cody. Naturally blond — and I mean blond and not dirty blond. Only one of subclan three who is. Any member of Torrent that’s not his brother is his friend. Chat Name: Jurassic Park.

Fives Fett: 13, just finished seventh grade. His full name will be revealed during Part 4. Twin to Echo (older by five minutes, yes). Wants to learn how to be a skydiving instructor solely to try to help Rex get over his fear of heights. Best friends are Domino Squad. Chat Name: Sixes.

Echo Fett: 13, just finished seventh grade. His full name will also be revealed during Part 4. Twin to Fives. Seems more chill than Fives but the reunion always proves that wrong. Best friends are Domino. Occasionally babysits the Havocs. Chat Name: ECHO Echo echo.

Tup Fett: 10, just finished fourth grade. Tup is his full name, yes. Starting to get into archery like his mom. Canon tattoo is a mole here. His hair’s down to his shoulders and super curly. Cody’s often pulling sticks out of it. Too young for the chat.

The Havocs (aka the Bad Batch)

Charisma Havoc (neé Fett): Interior designer. Married to Gunner. Mother to Hunter, Cross, Wrecker, Timmy. Also on the louder end of her and her siblings. The Havocs are pretty background characters, since their kids are much younger than Wolffe and also bc the show’s still establishing things.

Gunner Havoc: Carpenter. Married to Charisma. Father to Hunter, Cross, Wrecker, Timmy. Together Charisma and Gunner could probably start an HGTV show lol. But they don’t want to so they aren’t. Last name comes from the Havoc Marauder (tbb's ship).

Hunter Havoc: 14, just finished eighth grade. Part of his canon tattoo is a birthmark, though not all of it. His hair is also long enough to be put into a small ponytail. Keeli’s got some cousins to teach, doesn’t he lol. Chat Name: Hunter-Gatherer.

Cross Havoc: 12, just finished sixth grade. Grumpy almost-teenager. Wolffe doesn’t run into him often because he tries to avoid his older cousins (well, actually, most of his cousins) the entire reunion every year. Lurks in the chat but his username is Mad (courtesy of Thorn). I shortened his name because it is an actual name and Crosshair is only a clone name.

Walter “Wrecker” Havoc: 9, just finished third grade. The older cousins claim he got his nickname in the “Wrecker Incident” and make it out to be this overly dramatic thing that's classified to those 12 and under. In all reality, it was him accidentally crashing into a few things of his brothers when he was first learning to walk. Gree just thought it was hilarious to blow it out of proportion. Too young for the chat.

Timothy “Timmy” Havoc: 7, just finished first grade. Wears glasses. A bit too young to have Tech as a nickname quite yet, but he definitely would in the future. Also mostly in the background, considering he's 12 years younger than Wolffe. Too young for chat.

The Concords (aka let's add some more girls to this family)

Arla Concord neé Fett: She's the only adult beside her husband that I currently don't have a job listed for, but that's because my brain won't supply one. Second youngest of her siblings. Married to Felix. Mother to Clementine, Ansonia, Unique, Majorca, Tessa, Violet. Screw canon/legends, she's still alive.

Felix Concord: Again, haven't thought of a job for him yet, but he has one. Married to Arla. Father to Clementine, Ansonia, Unique, Majorca, Tessa, Violet. Last name comes from Concord Dawn.

Clementine Concord: 12, just finished sixth grade. Wants to be an astronaut or astrophysicist one day. Spends lots of time wrangling her younger sisters. Chat Name: Orange Gal.

Ansonia Concord: 10, just finished fourth grade. Wants to be an actress, really bring those dramatic Fett genes into play lol. Spends lots of time bugging Clementine and bossing around her younger sisters. Too young for the chat.

Unique Concord: 7, just finished first grade. Wants to be a doctor, spends lots of time hanging out with Ansonia. The two of them could probably do a pretty accurate hospital soap opera without prompting or knowing haha. Hangs with Corsica a lot at reunions, though. Yeah, idk where her name came from either. Dirty-blonde hair. Too young for the chat (duh).

Majorca Concord: 6, just finished kindergarten. Still learning basic writing and loves it so much she wants to be an author. Named after the city in Spain on accident — I totally didn’t realize that was why her name seemed familiar until like 2 months after I named her. Also too young for the chat or to appear much in the story.

Quintessa “Tess/Tessa” Concord: 5, preschooler. The other blonde kiddo. Picks on Gree’s hair without prompting from any cousins or sisters. Likes to play pretend with Majorca when they can. Also likes to draw stars and castles and such often. Obviously too young for the chat, appears slightly more because of her natural roasting abilities. 

Violet Concord: 3, maybe a preschooler? Again, doesn’t really appear much. Hangs out a bit with Boba and Tessa when the family gets together. Very very obviously too young for the chat.

Subclan Four (the OG Fetts)

Jango Fett: People usually make him one of the dads or the grandpa, but nah, he gets baby of his generation status. I wanted to keep with the “Arla is his older sister” thing but she’s the second youngest so he’s the youngest. Has been super mysterious about his life from the second he moved out but still shows up to family events. Knows who Boba’s mother is but refuses to tell. Father of Boba (obviously).

Boba Fett: 4, preschooler. Like I said above, hangs with Tessa and Violet during family events. More likely to accidentally reveal details about Jango’s life than Jango. Surprise baby but not for Jango. Jango knew. The family didn’t know until Jango showed up with infant Boba to a family event and went “this is Boba, no questions will be answered.” Also very obviously too young for the chat.

---

And that’s the extended Fett clan! Feel free to ask questions, I’ve got plenty of information about (most of) them and their roles in this au.

[translightyagami]

Mikalight Week fic: 24-Hour Gym

a short mikalight fic for, what else, @mikalightweek. wrote it sort of quick? and its not explicit but is very sensual and there’s a lot of body talk and you can basically assume they fuck after the fic (i was TOO LAZY to write the smut). Anyway.

This fic is rated BPBB, for Bench Pressing Bodacious Babes.

Quiet and soft humid air filled the gym. From the window, Teru watched him with his standard issue NPA duffel bag slung over his shoulder, laughing at a text on his phone. When he looked up, they almost met eyes and Teru turned, facing his reflection in the wall-length mirror. His black hair hung in lank strands beside his face; his grey T-shirt collar darkened into a full-leaf of sweat over his front. The gym door bells jingled as he came in, cheeks pink from the mid-winter outside and a wary smile on his face.

Of course, Teru recognized him. Kira. Light. Above the brown trendy haircut floated his full name, the kanji confusing for a minute until – congealed and solidified – the meaning existed. While Light checked in with the sleepy front desk clerk, he talked loud and high-pitched. It was a voice unlike the one Teru heard in the warehouse, the one that told him after the police and that little white haired boy were dead, to go home. To make up an alibi. And to meet him, at this little 24-hour gym, in ten days.

Watching Light’s mirror twin walk to the back lockers, Teru lifted his dumbbells on autopilot – eleven, twelve, twelve, no wait – before setting them down, grabbing the towel he tucked into his jogger’s waistband. Nervous sweat and exertion sweat mixed together, all mopped away by a monogramed hand towel. When he glanced back up, Light was at the rowing machine.

For twenty minutes, they waltzed: Light moved to a machine, doing his reps, while Teru went to a different machine, did his own program. (An unceasing eye for detail made note that Light lifted about ten under Teru’s lowest weight.) Having shed a jacket now that he’d warmed up, Light worked in a loose white tank top that hung low in the sleeve holes. Every so often, when he reached to grasp a bar, his chest swooped in and out of view. Teru caught scar tissue, though never a long enough glimpse to know its shape. He stood from the arm extension machine and walked to the bench press. All the way he felt two sharp eyes peering at him from a leg machine.

Teru set the plates: two 10 kg., and then two 2.5 kg. plates, an unusual though not overwhelmingly larger weight than he lifted on a normal night. Foolish and near school-boylike, he wanted to show off in front of the other man. After setting the weights, he leaned back and rested his head beneath the long metal bar – and waited. The sound of God walking, a long stride with confident footfalls, was familiar in Teru’s ears. Head haloed in florescent, Light bent above the metal bar with arms outstretched.

“Do you need a spotter?” His tone suggested a joke – ha, ha, who else but me – but Teru only heard the question in serious.

“Yes,” he said, and it was then he realized these were the first words he’d spoken to Light in public. How apt, how right, that their exchange be God extending his hands to help Teru carry such a heavy burden. Light hovered his palms just around the silver length, eyes trained on Teru as he wrapped fists at either end and – oh! – lifted. Every rep, staring directly into a brown-eyed microscope, and Teru almost shook, lost his strength, when their hands nearly brushed. He managed ten reps before gently resting the bar back in place. Sweat dripped off his neck and above him, it made gems across Light’s forehead.

“Wow,” Light said. “You’re pretty strong.”

“T-thank you,” Teru cursed his stutter. He didn’t expect the compliment and it made a little flower burst inside his concrete encased heart. The flower only grew the longer Light looked at him, smile just a pink curve, eyes unnervingly genuine. It was a look that fake people in movies gave each other – Teru hated how much he liked to trust it. God had to be genuine – a kingdom of justice would never stand on false ground. Light’s stare trapped him with a weight deeper and heavier than any dumbbell, and when he glanced away, Teru gasped. His breath had flattened in his chest.

Light left first, at midnight, and when Teru went to his own locker at one thirty am, he found a note shoved into the air slits. On the note was a phone number and curt letter L for a signature. He folded it into the smallest triangle he could, having memorized the number, and set the paper beneath his tongue. As Teru packed his things, nodded to the gym employee, walked into a cold and calamitous city sidewalk, the paper poked and scraped the inner wet flesh. Pain in little bites followed him on his walk – each bright moment a moment of God beside him. Do you need a spotter? A question, a divine extended hand. Wow. You’re pretty strong. Strong, a warrior disciple, God’s most beloved. And, at the platform for his train home, he swallowed the dissolving note – communion.

Teru started working out in high school, when a gym teacher suggested a natural physical ability like his could use sculpting and recognized in him a perhaps genetic inability to play on a team. Ever since the first time, he took to the regimentation, the preplanning and trackable results of gym life. Within the walls of his usual club – the membership to which took up an embarrassing but necessary amount of his pay – Teru found ritual. A work out was an offering to the divine in his own body, and now it became religious practice, a modeling of himself into a better tool for Kira’s will.

This late night arrangement became weekly. On Tuesdays, Teru and Light worked out in the same hole-in-the-wall 24-hour gym, just them and one employee. Two owls dancing around the machines, Teru knew both their stares were gobbling each other’s body behaviors like so many tasty mice. He saw in Light a similar high-school athletics resolve, although the way his muscles smoothed rather than fit into shapes spoke more to sports than targeted workouts. Teru resisted his own snobbery in this observation – though he found a dedication to the perfecting of the body rather than to sportsmanship more pleasing. Kira had his reasons, maybe, for choosing athletic pastimes. There too was a certain leanness to Light’s body as well. Even with a layer of more authoritative muscle, he looked vulpine, foxlike in his lithe frame. His posture retained the slight slouch that many people who were slim in their young adult hood had; in fact, Teru only recognized it since he himself trained it out of his own habits a year prior.

And, yet, the flurry of observation – itself a thrill in its artificial intimacy – didn’t compare to those few minutes where Light leaned over, put his elegant hands out, and spotted Teru’s bench press. He took to doing them more often than his usual schedule. Combined with the bigger weights, an unevenness grew in his routine that Teru would never have allowed before. He couldn’t stop himself though. Anything for a few moments close enough to Light to see the split of his lips, the sweat trickling over his flushed cheeks.

On the fourth week, while Teru wiped down the leg press after he used it, Light approached him.

“Hey,” he said. “Isn’t weird how we’re always in this place together, but we’ve never learned each other’s names?”

“Mikami Teru,” Teru said. The tone was straightforward, and his volume normal – and still he imagined how imprudent he sounded. “I don’t usually go to this gym.”

Light narrowed his eyes and shook his head, just enough to say not the plan. Up his back, Teru’s spine stiffened. It was no joy to disappoint Light.

“Well,” Light said, slick voice untwisting the frustration in his gaze and presenting a smile that bordered on pretty. “I’m Yagami Light. I’ve really admired your routine. Maybe sometime we can meet up. I’m no good with workouts, not like you.”

“Oh. Yes.” Teru nodded. Meet up? Before he could ask a clarifying question, Light spoke over his concerns.

“Call me tomorrow,” he said. “I’m free after five.”

He walked away, not leaving a number except the one boiled in Teru’s stomach. No matter how heavy the weights he lifted, no matter the volume of the baby crying on his bus home, all Teru thought of was his phone and tomorrow after five. His palms itched.

He called at five twenty the next day, having rushed home after a meeting went long, and Teru never heard a worse noise than the ringing before Light picked up. On first answering, his tone was unpleasantly gruff, accusatory – a man in the drag of an older, wiser man. It clashed with the smooth youthfulness of Light’s voice in the gym, which only returned when Teru tentatively said his own greeting.

“Oh! Mikami,” Light said, a balm over the scratches left behind by his put-on masculinity. “You’re calling so late. I thought maybe you forgot.”

“No,” Teru said. “Never. I don’t forget important things.”

“Mm,” Light said. Behind his voice was a tapping sound, someone hitting paper with a pen. “I’m honored to be an important thing. Say, I didn’t catch it before, but where did you say you lived?”

Teru sat on a kitchen stool; he’d been standing, impatient, in the breakfast nook as though preparing to run to wherever Kira needed him. But the question set him down – why did Light want to know? And was it safe to say over the phone? Realizing he’d left dead air too long, Teru muttered that he lived further south – about an hour from the 24-hour gym.

“Oh, I see,” Light sounded mildly perturbed to be have been waiting. “I was just thinking, my girlfriend is making cookies and I thought I’d send you some. Do you have an address that’d be good?”

His girlfriend? Teru didn’t press but his stomach sank. However the phrase stung, he listed his apartment address in dutiful detail. In his ear were the soft scratches of Light’s pen writing everything down and, once he finished, Teru coughed. He didn’t want the phone call to end.

“Did you play sports?” His question flowed out in a proper, clear way, and Teru congratulated himself on how normal he sounded. “Maybe in high school?”

Light went quiet and when he spoke again, the words were cold.

“I played tennis,” he said. “Why do you ask?”

“I only wondered because,” Teru scrambled for something less damning to say, “you’re in such good shape but don’t like to work out. And usually that’s because of sports, I find.”

“Ah,” a low simmer melted Light’s voice. “You like to work out, don’t you, Mikami?”

“Mm,” Teru said. “I enjoy the time to work on my body. Physical fitness is a key to leading a good, worthwhile life.”

“Interesting,” Light said. He tapped his pen before popping his lips. Their wet click was at once disgusting – the body, the spit, the base physicality of it – and alluring – the body, the spit, the parts of Kira blessed by his own inner spirit. “I’ll send those cookies tonight. Expect them at your door around midnight, hm?”

“Oh.” This wasn’t about cookies. “Yes, I’ll look for them then. Thank you, Light. That’s very kind of you.”

“I’m always kind to my friends,” Light said.

At midnight, Teru heard the curt knock of the one he waited for. Standing in the hallway of his apartment building, wrapped in a coat, green sweater and black jeans, was Light. He smiled when Teru gestured for him to come inside – a good, well-raised smile. In a small childish part of himself, Teru wished to return such a pleasant smile. Instead, he nodded and raised his eyebrows as Light pressed a plastic box into his hands.

“I wasn’t lying, before on the phone,” he said, shaking off his coat. “My girlfriend was baking. She insisted I take some to meet my new friend. My recommendation?” Light swung around, coat on his finger and a wryness to his expression. “Toss them. Misa can’t bake.”

“How unfortunate,” Teru said. I’m a passable baker, he thought.

Light walked further into the one-bedroom space. He put his coat onto the black lacquered hat rack’s lower rung, ran a finger across the tight gray rectangle couch, and complimented the large entertainment center Teru built. When he let it slip that, in fact, he’d built it himself, Teru saw a curl of interest in Light’s gaze.

“I’ve always liked building too,” Light said, shrugging. “But never something so well constructed.”

He wandered into the sitting room and looked to his feet, a play-acted shyness. Nothing in his body language bar the glance down suggested timidity. Teru followed, although he knew his own behavior was less confident. Light flicked his eyes up and stilled Teru’s movements.

“I’m proud of your actions,” he said. “How well you served me, served the kingdom Kira hopes to build.”

A tremor worked through Teru and he sat, unable to keep his legs steady. To be acknowledged made him eager and fraught. Without thinking, he bowed his head, and a warm palm pressed over the back of his neck. Light murmured something.

“What did you say?” Teru asked, eyes going blurry the longer he stared at his own lap.

“I said,” Light slid a finger beneath his chin, tipping Teru up and into his line of vision. “Do you think you could bench press me?”

“I,” Teru frowned, his instinct to refuse presenting weakness. He fought past it. “I can try.”

The smile from before – polite, the kind a mother asked for during family pictures, toothless – warped into the brilliant split Teru recognized from the yellow warehouse. Light smiled in high volume, loud and greedy.

“Perfect,” he said. “Let me undress.”

“Undress?” Teru’s resolve wavered and he stood.

Light shrugged, already popping the button of his jeans.

“Won’t you need better traction?” He asked. “My clothes might cause your hand to slip.”

Breathless, Teru watched God strip down to a pair of black briefs. Shirtless, the two pink scars he saw glimpses of before swiped just beneath Light’s nipples, which hardened in the air-conditioning. Mental deduction took Teru up to chest surgery, although he couldn’t pinpoint the reason. As he stared, Light’s eyes took on impatience not unlike when Teru slipped up in the gym.

“Do I not please you?” Light raised his eyebrows, swinging out his hands. “Do you find God wanting in some way, Mikami?”

“No, no,” Teru covered his mouth. “I apologize for the imprudence. I only was curious.”

“Keep curiosity to the cats,” Light said. “Now, lay back and we’ll try this.”

Teru pushed his coffee table to the side and laid himself down on the sitting room rug. Flat on his back, Light leaning over him almost nude, a strange helplessness infected him. No matter what happened next, he had no real choice other than what Light chose for him. It didn’t help that Light’s gaze had an almost lepidopterist’s leer – staring at a captured butterfly and wondering what pins to use on its corpse. Teru shook himself inside; Kira didn’t think of him as a butterfly. He was a servant, a faithful one, and Kira found him strong.

Stretching up his arms, Teru cupped his hands and met Light with his own stare.

“Whenever you’re ready,” he said, “slowly place your waist in my right hand and your thigh in my left.”

Light nodded, walking around to stand next Teru’s shoulder. He bent in a gentle arc and his waist was the first thing to touch against Teru’s palm. In a shift, the confidence of before didn’t echo in Light’s actions now. He was cautious, still leaving one foot on the ground as he laid himself into Teru’s grasp. A muffled groaned left Teru; even with his weight distributed away, Light was still heavy.

“Um,” Light said. “Is it okay to let go?”

The question was human, quiet, and Teru wanted to file it away suddenly. He took a deep breath, wiggled his fingers where they held Light, and nodded.

“Go ahead,” he said. “I’ve got you.”

Light gasped as he lifted his leg. Balanced between Teru’s straining arms, he hovered untouched by anything but air and the other man. Teru was in pain – not just from the difficulty of holding up an adult man but from how good Light felt. He was warm, soft, and yet at the same time hard, solid muscle beneath the skin. Gritting his teeth, Teru heaved and lowered his armload until Light’s hip was just above his mouth.

He couldn’t help himself; Teru kissed the bare skin. His lips slid just so over goosebumps, tasting hints of salt and body lotion. Even partway through, he wanted to kiss the vulnerable hip again – memorize the flavor of Kira against his mouth. Light trembled and let out his name in a rasp.

“Mikami,” Light whispered. “Fuck.”

No answer occurred to him, so Teru lifted Light back up. As charged as the moment was, a small part of him celebrated being strong enough to, in fact, perform one bench press of another human. Light squirmed in his hands, too much, and without warning, Teru’s grip loosened. God fell out of his palms and landed hard on Teru’s stomach, knocking the wind out of him.

“Ah,” he shouted at the same time Light yelled, “Fuck!” They sat in sore heap. Teru rubbed his hands together, over and over. He’d failed; he let Light fall, hadn’t been strong enough to keep him stable. With trepidation, he glanced toward the other man prepared to see anger in God’s eyes, but instead Light stared back at him with arousal. His eyes were hot, molten, and his movements became languid.

“You’re so strong,” Light said, and now his voice was like nothing Teru ever heard before. There was a wildness mixed in with hunger. Light looked at him, and Teru wanted to be devoured.

“I knew the moment I saw you,” Light crawled up Teru’s aching body, his words like lava poured from his mouth. “You would be my strongest one.”

“I want to be strong for you, God,” Teru let out. “I want to serve you, be your sword.”

“Oh,” Light laughed, and it was an abrupt sound. Teru couldn’t say he liked it but the brightness in Light’s cheeks was good.

“You’ll serve me very well,” Light said, brushing Teru’s hair away from his ear so he could speak into it. His voice burned into the delicate shell. “Mikami.”

“Teru,” his voice came out a little weedy, yet Teru met Light’s hot gaze with his own resolve. “Call me Teru.”

[soniaxdixon]

Until Now pt. 2

Part two of my new series, thank you to @huffledor-able541 for the name! This chapter gets a lil angsty but I promise it’ll get better. I hope you enjoy, thank you for reading!!

Word Count: 2231

Warnings: Mention of readers past, nothing too bad just slack parents. Angst

After a few days of bedrest, both you and Daryl were ready to rejoin the group. You had only met a few of them so far, Rick, Lori and Carol had been the ones to bring you and Daryl food, they were kind hearted, genuine people and you knew you would get along with them. You had met Andrea within your first moments, you two didn’t get off to the best start. You woke up in the same position you had fallen asleep in, right at the edge of the bed with a pillow in between you and Daryl, separating your bodies. Daryl had put it there a couple of nights ago saying that he ‘liked to lean against something while he slept.’ You knew he put it there to make sure you kept your distance. He did put it there for that reason, only it was because he thought that’s what you wanted.

Hershel walked into the room a few minutes after you had woken up.

“Just checking in. How’s your ankle feeling?” The sweet tone of his voice was a welcome sound in the morning.

“A lot better, I can’t thank you enough for everything that you have provided me with. A bed, food, medicine. I really appreciate it.” You smiled graciously at the man as he grasped your hand and squeezed it quickly before letting it drop back into your lap. He walked over to Daryl’s side of the bed as he began to stir.

“You awake there, son?” You smiled at how kindly Hershel treated Daryl, no matter how abrasive he could possibly be. Daryl sat up and mumbled a noise of affirmation. “I need to check your stitches. Make sure they won’t bleed over the next few days.”

Daryl sat up and allowed the man to check over his side and his head. You noticed every little flinch that occurred when Hershel would touch Daryl’s skin.

“I think you’re both right to go back to your people now.”

You nodded and smiled at Hershel before he left the room.

“You gotta introduce me to everyone now, Dixon. Gotta tell me about them all.” You chuckled slightly but could feel slight tension between the two of you.

“There ain't much to say about em. Just uh, just keep an eye on Shane.” His tone was serious but it didn’t stop you from joking around.

“Can’t keep an eye on Shane if I don’t know who Shane is.” You said winking at Daryl.

Both of you made your way over to the camp, you noticed that Daryl’s steps were slow as he was still recovering. Your ankle was stable but it throbbed with pain occasionally. Hershel had given you a tube of pain killers to help if it got too unbearable. Rick walked over to the two of you. “Great to see you guys up and about!”

Daryl nodded at the man before asking, “How’s the search going?” “Search?” You questioned, you were curious and listened intently.

“About a week ago we lost a little girl named Sophia, she’s Carol’s daughter. You found Daryl while he was out looking for her one day.” Rick answered.

“Oh my God, that’s terrible. If there’s anything I can do to help, please let me know.” You couldn’t bare the thought of the little girl being all alone.

“We’re planning on heading out today, how’s your ankle feeling?” Rick gave you a quick once over and noticed that you were standing a lot better than when he first met you.

“Not too bad, I’m happy to go out scouting.” It was what you were best at.

Rick nodded before gesturing over his shoulder to the man behind him. “Great, Shane is gonna-”

“Nah, nuh-uh, not him y/n” Daryl interrupted Rick mid sentence as Shane began walking over to the three of you.

“Daryl, it’s fine.” You turned to face the man that you had never met, outstretching your hand to shake his. “I’m y/n.”

He took your hand and smiled. “Shane.”

Before you knew it, you were sitting in the passenger seat of Shane’s car and driving away from a now very angry Daryl. You looked back at him one more time and could practically feel the daggers that he was sending your way with his stare. You looked over at Shane who seemed very serious, his eyes remained trained on the road, only flicking to the map occasionally. You reached into your bag and pulled out your water. You were in the middle of taking a long sip when Shane spoke.

“You been dating Daryl for long?”

You breathed in the water which sent you into a fit of coughs.

“Woah, woah, you okay?” He reached over to pat your back.

You took a few deep breaths. “Yeah, I’m alright. I just…Daryl and I aren’t um, together. We’re not dating.”

“Oh, I just thought. He seems very close to you.”

Your cheeks flushed red as you turned to face the road so Shane wouldn’t see. “We’ve been friends for as long as I can remember. Grew up together. When I left for college I didn’t really keep in contact with him even though I promised to.” You turned to look at Shane now. “I should have called him like I said I was going to, I just got caught up in the college lifestyle. I’m a bad person.”

“Not calling someone makes you a bad person? Nah, you were just becoming your own person. You found him anyway though, right.”

You smiled at the man. What did Daryl have against him?

“So uh, this kid. You think we’ll find her here?” You pointed to the map.

“Nah, she’s been missing for over a week and in this day and age, that only means one thing.”

“You never know. I went missing as a kid. Daryl had taught me how to track you see and one day I saw this stray dog, wanted to take it home so I followed it only I didn’t realise how long I’d been following it until the sun was setting and everything around me looked the same. Trees for miles beyond my sight. I was like 10 years old or something, I didn’t think rationally, I just sat in the middle of this forest and cried my eyes out.”

“Someone obviously found you.” Shane’s eyes remained fixed on the road.

“Daryl did. Said he could tell it was me the second he saw the foot prints, followed them all the way to me and brought me home to my parents.” You looked down at your shoes, finding something to focus on while you told the story to Shane.

“His parents just let him go out into the woods like that?”

“He uh, he lost his mom earlier that year. He’s a couple of years older than me so he was about 12 at the time. His dad wouldn’t have even noticed he was missing. Only person who would’ve cared slightly was Merle and he was in juvie again. He yelled at me when he found me. Told me I coulda died or something, he treated me like I was his responsibility. At least I had him taking care of me, my parents didn’t give a shit.”

“I’m sorry you had to experience that.”

You stared at Shane for a second. He really didn’t seem that bad.

“What are you staring at? It’s my hair cut, ain’t it.”

You tried to stifle the laugh that came out of you. “No, no, your haircut is, well, its a hair cut. Actually now that I’m focussing on it, I think you missed a spot.”

Shane rubbed the back of his head and smiled at you.

“I can fix it for you, when we get back if you’d like. Make sure it’s all even.”

“Thanks, much appreciated. Especially if it’ll stop you from staring at my head.”

The day went on, there was no sign of Sophia, not to Shane’s surprise. You both headed back home, swapping stories and laughing. When you got back to the farm you noticed that everyone was sitting around except for Daryl. Your eyes searched and noticed that his tent was the one slightly further away from the others. You and Shane walked over to the group, Shane broke the news that there was still nothing to be found while you walked over to Daryl’s tent.

“Daryl, you in there?” You waited a second, no response. You unzipped the tent slightly to find Daryl lying on his bed, twirling a bolt in his hands.

“Whad’ya want?”

“To come and see you, tell you about my day. Just like the good old days, right?”

He muttered a quiet noise before shuffling over on his bed slightly. You took it as an invitation to approach him.

You sat on his bed next to him has he started poking holes in the netting of his tent with the bolt in his hands.

“We went and checked a few houses in the town near by, see if there was any sign of the little girl. Couldn’t find anything. Shane thinks she’s dead.” Daryl’s motions suddenly stopped as his focus was now on you. “I don’t think she is, told him about the time you found me in the woods after I was ‘tracking’ that dog.”

Daryl’s body shook slightly as he laughed, remembering how he had to lead you home.

“Ya sat there crying your eyes out and then instead of following me home, ya tried to lead me further in to find that dumb dog.”

“Daryl I always wanted a dog, you know that.” You both laughed.

“Tell ya what, if I find a dog when I go out one day, I’ll bring it home for ya.” You locked eyes with him now and smiled sending shivers down his spine. Your smile did something to him, ignited something within him that drove him insane, it always had. You were soon interrupted by Andrea.

“Hey Daryl I-” Her eyes flicked to you and then back to Daryl. “I didn’t know you had company.”

You stayed sitting on the edge of Daryl’s bed, staring at the woman who was standing at the entrance to his tent.

“I brought you this book, I don’t know if it’s any good.” She handed the book to Daryl as your eyes remained trained on her. She looked at you now and spoke harshly “Daryl, why don’t you tell your guard dog to stand down.” Daryl saw your expression drop and tried to move but you stood up first, Andrea took a step back.

You looked her up and down before looking her dead in the eyes “If I knew how much of a bitch you actually were, I would have hit you harder.” You stepped closer to her. “Please give me another reason to hit you.” She wouldn’t show it but you intimidated her immensely. She rolled her eyes and left the tent.

“Ya look ridiculous when ya act tough.” And by ridiculous he meant ridiculously attractive.

“Act tough? You know I could beat her ass, same way I could beat yours.”

“Yeah maybe while I’m like this but not on a good day.” Your eyes wandered over him quickly, injuries swarmed his body.

“Alright next time you have a ‘good day’ I’ll prove to you that I can beat your ass.” You sat back down on the bed next to him, your hand accidentally brushed his which sent a jolt of electricity through your spine. His cheeks flushed red but his hand didn’t move and neither did yours. You decided to test the waters a little further by actually grabbing his hand in yours. “I thought I was gonna lose you when you got shot.”

“But ya didn’t. I’m right here.” He sent another shiver down your spine as he adjusted himself in the bed, sitting up, ever so slightly closer to you. His hand remained in yours. You noticed his eyes were fixed on your lips which made your head cloud with all types of emotions.

“Y/n, you in there?” Shane’s voice broke your silence and you stood up quickly from the bed detaching yourself from Daryl both physically and mentally. You turned and exited the tent to see what Shane wanted. Daryl was livid, he could hear you talking and giggling just outside his tent. He bit his thumb until he drew blood.

You walked back into the tent with a smile on your face but that smile was not matched by Daryl.  “Why don’t ya just say it?” His tone had changed dramatically in the few minutes that you were outside.

“Say what?”

“Ya with him now?”

“With who?” You looked at him but his eyes wouldn’t meet yours.

“Shane.” You could hear the hatred in his voice.

“You think I’m with Shane?”

“I know ya are and I don’t fucking care. Ya deserve each other.” His southern drawl became so prominent when he was angry, apart from his tone it’s how you could tell he was upset. That and the way he would avert his eyes and gnaw at his bottom lip.

“Are you serious, Daryl? I don’t know what to say.”

“There ain’t anything left to say, so don’t. Don’t bother saying anything ever again. Just leave me be.”

You had no idea where this was coming from but you weren’t dealing with it, you left his tent quickly before tears welled in your eyes. Where were you going to stay? You couldn’t ask Hershel to stay in the house again and Daryl was the only person you really knew in this group. You had nowhere to-

“Hey, y/n, you alright?” You turned to face Shane, wiping the tears from your eyes.

“Peachy.”

“You wanna stay with me tonight?”

It’s like he could read your thoughts. “That would be great, thank you.”

[intothewickedwood]

Once Upon A Time Rewatch: 6x14 Page 23

Okay what episode do we have today?

Ah okay, a Regina centric. That’s cool.

Is that the same guard Snow stripped naked in 1x16? Whaaaat?! Just looked it up and it totally is! Awesome call back! I’m going to name him Jim.

Oh my God, she killed Jim!!

Wait, so this has to be after Heart of Darkness.

The terrified look on that woman’s face when Regina strokes her chin, looks at her longingly and tells her she loves her. Omg Regina was in love with this woman all along! It was never about Daniel. It was about Christina! I’m naming her Christina. 

They are my otp now.

How did Tinker Bell get out of neverland? Pan decides when people leave, and I doubt he’d let her leave just to pay a visit with the Evil Queen. But then and again maybe it was all part of his big plan.

Oh. Pixie dust doesn’t dictate who your true love is. It just shows you possibilities. That’s not what you said before, Tinker Bell!

Regina, we all know you spared her because she’s your ex-girlfriend.

Actually, this visit from Tinker Bell is odd because she doesn’t seem angry at all like when she, like, wanted to kill Regina in 3x03. How did she go from, “okay. I lost my wings because of you but it’s all cool. I just want my otp together.” to “I’m gonna f***ing drug you with pixie dust and rip your heart out!”?

Also, this is the Evil Queen I like to see. So cold, terrifying and breaking on the inside. I’m not a fan of the humorous one in 6x02. I wish Split Queen was more like this as well. Ah different writers and director. Interesting.

Split Queen: “…not some burlap-loving peasant who sleeps on dirt.” Wish Robin: “Excuse me, I sleep on hay.” Important distinction!

Snow’s so excited about the wedding, bless her.

Lol Zelena just drags Emma’s hand to look at her ring. My girl loves shiny things! And how could I forget, her otp is getting married! She is in heaven right now!

I love Emma just casually talking to Zelena like they’re gal pals at a sleepover. More of this please! 

I can see what sqers say about this scene. Regina really does look hurt by the notion of Emma getting married. There is no heterosexual reason for her to react like this unless she’s in love with Hook. I think this is the only time they hug. Man, I feel so bad for sqers because upon this rewatch I can really see where they are coming from with that interpretation. It’s definitely there. And then they hug because Emma’s getting married to someone else. I would be so upset if that was my otp. What am I talking about, I watched 10 seasons of Smallville as a hardcore Chloe x Clark shipper. I think this exact scenario played out and it freaking hurts! 

In other news, I am so in love with Snow. Have I mentioned that? I feel like I haven’t mentioned it in a while and it needs to be said. 

I’m also in love with David, in case you forgot. I want to join their marriage. Can I join their marriage? I’m joining their marriage. Emma, I’m your mummy now. Don’t think about the age difference too much. 

I’ve eaten a lot of chocolate already today. Can you tell? I feel so alive! I want to share my social security number and be freeee!! I am trying to block out my anxiety about having to move house again next friday. Yep, that’s right, 4th place in two years. I think I will write all of these high on chocolate.

What would happen if you cut your hair with those sheers? Or your garden bush? No, that is not a euphemism, you dirty bastards (affectionate). 

I haven’t had a haircut in 10 years. Holy cow! That’s why my afro is so big, it’s full of secrets. 

Nemo is your dad now, Hook. Even though I’m pretty sure he’s a lot younger than you. 

He called him “My boy.” hehe.

I remember when I thought Hook and Rumple had the same mother. That would have been quite the twist.

I thought that vase of flowers was a giant cauliflower. Did you know broccoli, cauliflower, cabbages, brussels sprouts and turnips are all related? I wonder what thanksgivings are like when they all get together. Probably not fun for them. 

See what I did there xD? 

Emma: “This is my fault. I’m the one who convinced you to bring him here. It’s on me.” Regina: “Emma, you don’t have anything to make up for. You were just trying to help.” Omg, this compared to when she told Emma she’d ruined her life because Emma saved Marian. The development. I really appreciate this change because I nearly lost it with Regina when that was her attitude. 

Screw it, I’m making bean enchiladas. Brb. I’ll save you some!

I’m back! They’re in the oven. Anyone wants the recipe hmu! They’re veggie! 

You just know Split Queen and Wish Robin have a sexy dungeon in their castle. They just do.

Enchanted ropes would have been useful in so many situations.

The enchiladas are ready! Repeat after me, Becky: “I will remember oven gloves this time, I will remember oven gloves this time.”

Robin is so into Split Queen. He wants her to live with him and everything, even though they just met. 

I don’t think that arrow would have taken her to Robin since it takes her to the thing she loves most. She can’t love someone she’s never met. We all know it would shoot Christina right in the ass. That’s true love biatches! Evil Peasant 5ever!

Oh snap! Emma found Hook looking at himself killing her grandfather??! I completely forgot about this!

Why does she say, “That’s David’s father”? Why doesn’t she say, “That’s my grandfather,” or “That’s my dad’s dad”? She hasn’t called her dad ‘David’ in years. It’s like she’s trying to separate herself from the victim as much as possible.

She’s not even a little bit upset he killed her dad’s dad? That that event caused her father so much pain? She’s just infuriated that he tried to burn his memory. I mean, yes, she should be angry about that but where’s the empathy for her dad at least? I didn’t know any of my grandfathers well but if I found out I was engaged to someone who did that I would be angry for my grandparent, angry for my parent and angry for myself. I’m just speechless that that’s all she cares about. It seems so out of character. But then and again Regina had her other grandad killed. 

And now he’s gonna leave because he rightfully got told off. Can’t say I’d offer the same thing but she said, “until you’re ready” not “you’ll never be ready”, dude. 

I think he’s just scared David will punch him in the face at this point. It’s the only explanation for doing the exact opposite thing Emma asked of him.

“Captain Hook is always welcome on the Nautilus.” More like welcome on the naughty list after that stunt.

She doesn’t want a man, Henry Sr. She just confessed her deep, passionate, sexual love for Christina like 20 minutes ago, remember? Sometimes I wonder why I bother. It’s not even subtext, dude. Get it together, man.

Why don’t they fight themselves with magic?

Her dad is so heartbroken the person Regina hates most is herself. 

That is really sad that the person she hates most his herself. I can relate.

Yes! Launch those apples at yourself! 

My conversations with myself be like-

Oh boy. This is too reminiscent of conversations with myself. Yes, I sword fight myself wearing a fancy black, cleavage-revealing dress in my head all the time. Only joking, I wear trilby hats. 

Oh okay. Now they’re tying each other up. I see what this is really about. I still haven’t bleached the “we do like it rough, don’t we Regina?” line from my mind. 

I suppose she did take back some of her own darkness. But I was hoping she would just merge herself back together. That would have been a really predictable outcome, but I just would have preferred it. 

This scene is so weird lol, but it helped me tremendously. I used to hate myself so, so much. You don’t even understand. It was like a violent hatred for myself for not fitting in and for every single little mistake I’d ever made. Then with a lot of self- healing and the help of this episode I began my journey into loving myself. I wrote on a sticky note “Love yourself. If the Evil Queen can do it, so can you.” and stuck it to my wall. Nothing I’ve done is comparable to what the Evil Queen has done and if she can learn to love herself, why can’t everyone else. Anyone who’s struggling with self-hatred, please take this episode to heart. You are worthy of love, most importantly from yourself. Any time you find yourself hating yourself just try to remember this scene and that the flipping Evil Queen of all people recognised the importance of self-love and didn’t give a damn what anyone else thought. She damn well gave herself a chance. I’ve heard a good technique is looking in the mirror and telling yourself what you love about you. Even if you’re not feeling it at first, you could get into the habit of it and your brain will start to accept those words as true. Because they are true.

Aww she sees the Charmings as her family. 

Regina: “it did give me hope when I needed it most, and that is just as important.” Oh my God, preach the word Regina! Regina is preaching with fire today! 

It’s like she’s having a therapy session with herself. I need to do that. I really do. Then I need to get actual therapy lol xD. But baby steps! 

Okay. A loophole as to how he can change Split Queen’s story. You know what, at this point I’ve learnt just to go with it.

Can Snow and Zelena be best friends? Please. It’s literally all I want in life. And to join Snowing’s marriage. I’m not asking for much. I’ll talk about it in self-therapy.

Henry’s got Gideon’s haircut now. He wants to be cool like his uncle.

I want to look at myself with the love and adoration Regina looks at herself with. We should all get to that point where we look like we’re about to intensely make out with ourselves when we look in the mirror. 

I know what they were doing with page 23. I just wish Split Queen had changed her outfit so it could have been exactly like the page illustration. But I don’t think it was meant to predict the future. It was just one of Isaac’s fanfictions, wasn’t it? Hmm. I think it was a mystery to him as well if I can remember correctly.

It’s nice that oq shippers got their ship in the end in one form.

Snow is just constantly high up to her eyeballs on hope, bless her. 

Emma needs a dog. She seems like such a dog person.

Also, that enchilada was yumilicious, if I do say so myself.

[snkpolls]

SnK Episode 71 Poll Results (for Manga Readers)

The poll closed with 176 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Manga Readers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll, click here.

--

RATE THE EPISODE 172 responses

This week’s episode keeps up the high mark of the previous episodes, with 98.8% of respondents giving the episode a score of 3 or higher (overwhelmingly 4s and 5s). Nice!

It was aight. 

It's cool

8.5/10 

great!

Very rocky imo in terms of animation, as the cracks are beginning to show but overall look like the backgrounds and music choices were top tier.

Really good episode, I was disappointed in the jacket scene but it’s not the end of the world

loved it

It was overall a great episode I loved it. 

🔥🔥🔥

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOMENTS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 174 responses

46.6% of respondents overall were most excited to see Eren meeting up with Floch and the others, with 23.6% of those respondents favoring the scene of Eren putting on his jacket specifically. 12.1% most enjoyed seeing the angry citizens shouting out the Survey Corps motto. 9.8% were thrilled to see Zackley’s death animated. 8% were psyched to see Pieck in disguise at the end, and 6.9% most enjoyed the moment where Hitch caught Armin red-handed trying to touch Annie’s crystal.

YOUR REACTION TO EREN PUTTING ON HIS JACKET? 171 responses

Eren putting on his jacket was a scene many obsessed over when it first appeared on page and many looked forward to seeing it animated. Most of the response choices were focused on various forms of swooning over Eren and his abs. Some (13.5%) stated that they didn’t really understand the dramatism and some others (another 13.5%) simply stated that they did not see much in Eren outright. We’ve gotten a lot of write-ins about comparisons to the pre-animated trailer shot of said scene. More on that in a later question. 

i mean i understand the thirst, but eh

Prefer manga :/

The trailer did it better 

Meh. Better in the trailer and the manga.

TF was that? Well it's still good in its own way. 

YES! YES! YES! YES! Y E S! 

both "HOOOOOLYYYYYY 😳" and "so dramatic and for what?"

Trailer/Manga shot was way better

Manga shot/trailer version are way better. Dissapointed

Trailer looked better :(

Mappa only made Reiner thicc, why Eren is so frain he has 1,85! He is so strong in the manga

I don't care

Manbun.........👀

He can have my babies anytime 😌💅🏻

Not as sexy as advertised; that’s okay, though.

That scene looked weird af ngl. It looked better in the trailer 😔

Me after THAT eren scene: 🤰🏻🤰🏻🤰🏻

Eren makes my dick rise

ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW HAPPY ARE YOU NOW THAT WE APPEAR TO BE GOING BACK TO LEVI AND ZEKE’S PERSPECTIVE NEXT WEEK FOR A BIT? 171 responses

Levi and Zeke’s chemistry has been the subject of praise for many, so it’s no wonder that 87.1% of respondents are rather excited to get back to seeing Levi and Zeke again. Wow!

ARE ARMIN’S FEELINGS FOR ANNIE GENUINELY HIS OWN? 173 responses

Armin’s feelings for Annie have been looked at under a microscope for a variety of reasons, which is why we’re asking if you believe that his feelings for her are genuine. A plurality, 49.1% think that they’re a mixture of his feelings for her, as well Bertolt’s. Slightly less (30.6%) believe that Armin’s feelings for her existed since before any of the recent developments. Only a select few believe that he either became interested in her post-timeskip or that his feelings are solely influenced by Bertolt. One person doesn’t think Armin has any feelings for Annie at all. And a few others just don’t care.

Bertmin simping for Annie and that apparently being enough for her to start considering him as boyfriend material is the fucking worst. I hate this shit. It's made me like both characters considerably less.

Uhh Armin where ya reaching?! 

He was interested with her even before it was revealed she was the Female Titan and now that he has Bertholdt's memories, he sympathizes with her too and wants to understand her more so maybe Bert's memories intensified his feelings

His feelings for Annie are mostly his own. Bert's feelings might be in there a little, but the feelings are still Armin's.

CONTINUITY ALERT! EREN HAS HIS HAIR UP IN A BUN IN YELENA’S FLASHBACK. THOUGHTS? 173 responses

Uh-oh, Eren’s hairstyle moment. It would appear that there might be a continuity error with Yelena’s flashback and whatever that means for the timeline. A slight plurality (37%) didn’t seem to care about this, actually. But 33.5% appeared to believe that it was a mistake on MAPPA’s part that might get fixed in the BluRay version of the episode. 16.8% also believe that it was a mistake, but don’t believe it’ll get fixed. 9.8% think that it’s actually a retcon and that Eren’ll have the man bun when Chapter 123 gets adapted in Final Season Part 2.  

I hope it gets fixed because it's bugging me.

I really wish it was like how it was in the manga. Eren looks good with his hair down in his 16-17-year-old phase. Despite the error, it wasn't a deal breaker for the episode.

He looks totally gorgeous with his hair up in a bun, please let this mistake be

Honestly I don’t mind it. It looks great either way.

Eren in a manbun is a total win for me!

WHICH PIECES OF INFORMATION MISSING FROM YELENA’S ADMISSION IN THE MANGA DO YOU WISH WOULD HAVE BEEN INCLUDED IN THE ADAPTATION? 163 responses

As with almost all dialogue-heavy chapters in this series, there are cuts. In this episode, these cuts mostly affected the conversation between Yelena and Pixis. The most yearned for cut material was Yelena never telling Eren to go along with the plan and Yelena saying that she used Floch as a “go-between” between her and Eren. Others also noted missing lines about Yelena wanting Eren to stand up for himself, Yelena stating that Zeke gave the volunteers a hopeful future and the idea that her and Eren came to quick agreement. The plurality (31.9%) however, didn’t seem to mind any cuts. 

WHAT ARE YOU OVERALL FEELINGS ABOUT SOME OR ALL OF THE AFOREMENTIONED DETAILS BEING CUT? 161 responses

There is often a sort of expectation to have everything (or almost every) line from the manga adapted in the anime, so it’s interesting to see how people react to that sort of stuff. An almost 50% of respondents stated that they didn’t really care about the cuts, whereas smaller handfuls of respondents stated that the cuts either took away from the characterization of the conversation, or from the context and timeline-building purposes. 

I'm not thrilled about the cuts, but I understand MAPPA can only fit so much in on each episode, so I'm okay with it

the yelena/volunteers plot has always been wonky and hard to follow

I don’t think it’s a problem, they need to cut certain things. 

i literally never notice but i agree that it makes it harder to piece things together 

Meh

It might seem for anime watchers that Yelena didnt do much, and Floch and Zeke that did the most part, in their own plans. Floch to betray and Zeke in predicting Eren wouldnt be on his side in some way. Yelena helped Zeke a lot to where he arrived in the rumbling 

All of the above

ZACKLEY WALKS OVER TO HIS TORTURE MACHINE IN THE ANIME BEFORE MIKASA ASKS WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO EREN, RATHER THAN GLANCE OVER AT IT AFTER HER QUESTION. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE CHANGE? 170 responses

There was a partially comedic insinuation in the manga that Zackley thought about strapping Eren to his “art piece”. The insinuation is possibly still there in the anime, but in a different form. So we asked how you felt about it. Slightly below a half (48.8%) stated that they thought the subtlety was still there. 18.8% thought the subtlety was lost with the small change and 8.8% believed the change made Zackley seem less unhinged. 21.8% really didn’t care at all. 

Why is this a question?

The glance was funny as fuck in the manga, but might have been awkward to pull of in the animation

They're blown up tho, does it even matter?

DID EREN KNOW ABOUT THE BOMB? 170 responses

Whether Eren truly knew about the bomb is a bit unclear to this day and with how it endangered Armin and Mikasa. A plurality (40%) believe he knew about the bomb, but did not know about his childhood friends meeting Zackley. Slightly less (30.6%) think that Eren did not know about either the bomb or AM meeting the Artist. A minority (7.1%) does believe that Eren knew about both the bomb and meeting and 21.8% simply aren’t sure!

Even if he didn’t know, he obviously doesn’t care either way.

THERE IS SOME DEBATE ABOUT WHETHER EREN’S JACKET SCENE WAS BETTER ANIMATED IN THE PROMOTIONAL VIDEO OR IN THE EPISODE ITSELF. WHICH DO YOU CHOOSE? 170 responses

Here we go… The elephant in the room… Which Eren abs scene did you prefer? The Promotional video or the actual episode? A somewhat slight majority (57.1%) seemed to like the version seen in the promotional video more than the episode itself versus the ones who preferred the episode’s style (42.9%).

THE EPISODE MARKS THE BEGINNING OF FLOCH’S ACTIONS AS THE VOICE OF THE YEAGERISTS. HOW ARE YOU FEELING ABOUT IT? 170 responses

Floch has always been a controversial character and the developments seen post-time skip have not been any less debatable. You may floching love him or floching hate, but he’s here and he’s staying for a while. A plurality (48.8%) notes that although they may not personally be a fan of the character, they truly do appreciate the nuance his appearance gives to the story. Just over a quarter (25.3%) stated that as big fans of the character, they’re looking forward to all the screentime the Flochster will receive. In contrast, 20.6% despise the man and his questionable haircut and are also dreading the showcase he’ll soon receive.  

I hate Floch and will cheer again when he dies, but I enjoy his character.

I detest Floch but I'm not dreading all the screen time he'll take up.

Since he died in the manga, my hatred for him has cooled down somewhat now that I'm watching the anime.

I am once again asking for you to shut the fuck up, Floch.

WE KNOW NOW THAT EREN DID CONSPIRE WITH FLOCH TO BETRAY ZEKE TO ENACT THE RUMBLING. STILL, DO YOU BELIEVE HE DID IT BECAUSE HE HAS THE SAME BELIEFS AS FLOCH, OR WAS HE JUST USING FLOCH AND THE YEAGERISTS AS A MEANS TO AN END? 161 responses

An overwhelming amount of respondents (87.6%) stated that they believe Eren never truly saw eye to eye with Floch and his ideology and that Eren was simply using Floch as a means to an end. In contrast, 9.3% truly do think that Eren was ideologically similar to Floch and the “New Eldian Empire”. A select few thought you couldn’t just say one way or another. 

They both wanted to protect Paradis

DO YOU THINK IF THE YEAGERISTS, BESIDES FLOCH, KNEW ABOUT THE FULL SCALE RUMBLING BEFOREHAND THAT THEY WOULD WILLINGLY FOLLOW EREN? 167 responses

The majority (53.3%) feel that the Yeagerists would see a divide if they knew beforehand that Eren wanted to initiate the rumbling, with some sticking around for the cause and others possibly leaving because it’s too extreme. 25.1% believe that they all would have fully supported the rumbling in the name of their own survival. 15% believe that every Yeagerist already knew about the plan to commence the rumbling, and only 6% feel that they would most certainly have betrayed the Yeager brothers (and Floch) if they had known. 

I don’t know, this is a loaded question and I’m tired.

DO YOU THINK THAT, IF THE STORY ENDS PEACEFULLY, MIKASA WILL HAVE A ROLE TO PLAY IN HIZURU? 170 responses

While this plotline may not be going anywhere in the manga (or so it seems), the reminder of its existence is brought to light again as we revisit these older moments from the manga. 32.4% feel that Mikasa wouldn’t leave Paradis behind to start a life on Hizuru. 23.5% think that she wouldn’t leave Paradis behind, necessarily, but will still have a role to play in Hizuru. 21.2% think it doesn’t matter because Isayama has completely discarded (or forgotten) about this plotline. 12.4% don’t know what to predict (if anything) and only 8.2% believe that her future lies in Hizuru beyond the main storyline.

The last two options plus me not caring. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

hizuru is already rumbled, gone, but she will continue the azumabito clan in paradis

Is no one else gonna question Kiyomi's hair being sucked into her skull??? HELLO MA'AM???

Hizuru is likely flattened

WHICH SCENE FROM THE PREVIEW ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? 171 responses

Episode 72 has already broadcasted as of the completion of this poll. For scenes that were most anticipated, 35.7% were most looking forward to seeing Levi and Zeke’s interaction in the forest. 33.3% most looked forward to Niccolo leaning straight from Gabi’s mouth that she is Sasha’s killer. 18.7% highly anticipated the Blouses learning about Gabi killing Sasha, and 9.4% were looking forward to Gabi/Falco and the Blouses gathering at Niccolo’s restaurant. Only a small amount were looking forward to Niccolo protecting Jean and Connie from drinking the wine.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Man the animation was gonky 

no levi </3

So many faces of Niles are weirds !

Let hange aloneeeeeeee and happy, please

I have no word for this, but I feeling good

Shit is getting really real now! 

Everyone talking about Eren’s abs and I just wanna say the music in that scene was amazing!

I loved how it was all neatly put together and fast moving

Armin looked so good. Homie walked from point A to B and i SCREAMED. Thank you. 

i wish they included eren's warhammer escape from the prison, besides that solid episode all around, the people chanting 'dedicate your hearts' gave me chills 

I can't stand Hitch at all but MAPPA made her really pretty. Re: The jacket scene The trailer version was pretty much identical to the manga panel. But I liked the version that made it into the final episode too. People have been so ridiculous about MAPPA ""ruining everything"" this season, they should stop watching if that's how they feel. I thought Eren looked great and found the sun shining on his abs funny. The scenery was better in the episode, imo. I hope they don't cut Jean's line about booze not caring about what race you are. Lmao

Meh. It's not bad of course, I just find the rythm weird and I don't really feel many emotions watching the episodes. And I was so thirsty for the jacket scene, and it turned out weird too.

Mappa pls stop drawing eren like shit he is gorgeous in the manga

MMGH SOON!! LET'S GOOOOOOO

You friccin moron, you just got zooked!

i miss eremin </3

Wish they had shown how eren used his titan powers to escape.

I'm so not looking forward to the controversy that's gonna be reignited during the EMA talk scene. I'm actually dreading it, but we'll finally get the Levi vs Beast Titan scene so I'll be fine

112 will destroy ships 

I felt the animation was flawless as usual but the script was kinda boring, I expected more of these aspects: -Yelena, it was bland with the cuts -Hange, they cut something I cant figure what in this Yeagerists coup act that turned her scenes a little bit lacking? Idk something -Again the soundtrack in the episodes is so silent. The only episode so far I liked the ost beyond the Opening and Closing themes is Reiner episode. I miss the melodrama of Witstudio osts

Eren putting his jacket on in slow-speed whilst talking at regular speed is fucking trippy

Just happy to see Hitch!

It was slow and mainly plot driven. I enjoyed it despite the changes.

goddamn is that a hella well-animated explosion

more abs please

Great episode. Really ridiculous how many people overreacted about the jacket scene. It's ok to perfer the way the trailer did it but to those who say Mappa is ruining the adaptation because of minor things like this, calm down. 

I wish the jacket scene was better But over all the ep is pretty good

Boring, but then again so was this phase in the manga.

I really like the VA they chose for Onyankopon! His voice is very warm and genuine, which suits his character well

The sunset was so aesthetically pleasing 

yoooo just read ch. 138 and im crying in da club :(

These MAPPA episodes have been a low point for me. I’m trying to enjoy them because I love this story but it feels like a chore.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 161 responses

Thanks again to everyone who participated!

[king-finnigan]

Ok so you know those fics where Geralts hair is damaged by a monster and Jaskier fixes it? Modern au, but Geralt still hunts monsters and lives with his platonic friend (crush) jask. One night he comes home and his hair is wrecked so jask helps him cut it but he realizes too late that the clipper doesn’t have a guard. This would 11/10 help me cope with how my sister did the same thing to me :( lol

I now have an incredibly drastic short side cut and a guilty sister. Luckily we aren’t going out so it will grow lol. I just feel like that’s something (messing up clippers) Jaskier would do.

A/n: oh noooo, I’m so sorry to hear that! I hope your hair grows back quickly! Hope this little fic helps lmao. (Also I added a bit onto the story because I have one (1) hobby and I can and will use it in my writing)

Jaskier looks up from his book when he hears the roaring of Roach’s engine outside the living room window. He can’t help the wild grin that spreads across his face, though he takes a moment to gather himself as he walks to the front door – he doesn’t really wanna show Geralt how glad he is to see him after spending the last few days on his own. After all, Geralt’s just a housemate, nothing more. Definitely not Jaskier’s crush. No, sir.

His composure falls when he swings the door open and finds his Witcher in the driveway, his hair a veritable fucking mess. He bursts out into laughter, which earns him a glare from Geralt, who pushes past him, into the house. “Don’t mention it,” he grumbles.

Jaskier closes the front door behind him, leaning against it as he watches Geralt dump his laundry by the washing machine under the stairs, his face as still as ever, the tightening of his jaw the only sign that he’s in a really bad mood. Of course, Jaskier’s never let that stop him.

“So what happened, Witcher? Run into a lawnmower?” Geralt glares at him again, and Jaskier grins. It does really look like a mess – a large chunk of hair missing from the back of his head, some loose strands hanging at random lengths around it.

He sighs, folds his arms in front of his chest. “Alright, I’ve got an idea. There’s no way that’s gonna look good for the next…” he waves his hand a bit “year or so? At least until it grows back to full length, which is gonna take a while. So, what if… I give you a new haircut?”

Geralt looks at him, narrows his amber eyes. “No.”

Jaskier scoffs, leaning his head against the door, looking up at the ceiling. He notices a spider web in the corner and makes a mental note to vacuum it up later. “Come on, Geralt. We both know your hair’s gonna look like shit if we don’t do something about it. And you know,” he shrugs, “maybe it’s time for a new look. You’ve had the same haircut for… what? Sixty years? Don’t you think it’s time for something new?”

Geralt sighs, his shoulders slumping a bit in defeat. “Fine, I’ll go to a hairdresser tomorrow.”

Jaskier scoffs, pushing himself away from the door to start loading in the washing machine. “No, you won’t. You told me you don’t want a stranger with scissors getting anywhere near you, like, a year ago. Oh, don’t give me that look, I actually listen to what my housemate says, unlike some people.”

He straightens again, slams the washing machine door shut. “Look, Witcher, I’ve got perfectly good scissors and clippers in the bathroom. I’m perfectly adept at cutting my own hair and maintaining it, so doing yours would be easy as fuck. Your options are trusting me, trusting a stranger, or looking ridiculous.” He shrugs, picking his book from the living room table, walking up the stairs as Geralt continues staring at him. “Your choice.”

---

A knock on his door startles him out of his concentration. “Yeah?” The door opens a crack, and he sees Geralt’s amber eyes peering at him. “What is it? Changed your mind?”

“Hmm.” The door closes again, and Jaskier can’t help the slow smile that spreads across his face as he closes his laptop and gets up. He finds the Witcher in the bathroom, his hair clean and slightly damp from, presumably, a shower – though still very much a mess.

“Alright, so…” He waves his hand vaguely. “Any ideas? What do you want to do with it?”

Geralt’s frown deepens, and he looks at himself in the mirror. “I don’t know.”

Jaskier sighs, purses his lips. “Alright, let me see.” He moves to stand behind Geralt, carding a hand through the soft locks, assessing the damage. “Yeah, definitely gonna have to go for an undercut, here. Or a crewcut, if that’s what you want?”

“No.”

“Okay, undercut it is.” He takes a step to the side so he can see Geralt’s face in the mirror. “Do you want the top to be, like, the same length as my hair, or like, as long as it is now?”

Geralt seems to hesitate, eyes flickering between himself and Jaskier, probably trying to imagine how he would look with hair the same length as Jaskier’s. Finally, he seems to decide, and nods once. “Long.”

Jaskier grins, pushing past Geralt to rummage in the cupboard under the sink. “Alright, please do take my desk chair from my room, master Witcher, and I’ll be with you shortly.”

He doesn’t miss Geralt’s eyeroll, though the Witcher does as he’s told, walking out of the bathroom, returning with Jaskier’s chair. Usually, he does his own hair standing up, but Geralt is an inch or two taller than him, which would make it hard to do his hair – it’s easier if Geralt sits down. Which is what the Witcher does, before Jaskier even has to ask. He grins again, and moves to stand behind Geralt, hairtie in hand. He gathers the hair at the top of Geralt’s head, tying it up in a messy bun, so he doesn’t accidentally cut it off, before he takes the heavy scissors.

“Alright, we’re gonna have to cut off the longer parts first, before I shave it.”

He sighs, taking a lock at the back of Geralt’s head, before looking up, meeting amber eyes in the mirror. “You ready?” Geralt nods, once. Snip. The lock falls to the ground, Jaskier’s eyes following it all the way down. He sighs again. “Alright, let’s continue.”

---

Before long, the back and sides of Geralt’s head are significantly shorter, and Jaskier lays down the scissors, flexing his stiff fingers a bit, before taking the clippers.

“Hmm. Maybe start with 9 and work our way down? That way we can always cut it shorter if it’s too long.”

Geralt sighs softly, rolling his eyes. “Fine. Just get it over with.”

Jaskier grins. “Don’t like clippers?”

“Too loud.”

He nods, even though he personally enjoys the buzzing of the clippers, enjoys the feeling of them scraping against his head, but hey, to each their own, he supposes. He turns them on, setting them against the back of Geralt’s head. He heaves a soft sigh, before moving the clippers up, and-

Oh, fuck.

He forgot to put the guard back on the clippers. Meaning that those 9 millimeters he planned on leaving on Geralt’s head have turned to… well, 0. He can’t hide the horror on his own face as he looks from the clippers to the bald patch he managed to create on Geralt’s head.

“What did you do?”

He looks up at Geralt’s reflection, at the amber eyes studying his face intently, a storm brewing beneath the surface.

“Jaskier, what did you do?” the Witcher repeats, and Jaskier swallows thickly.

“I, uh… Forgot the guard. And now…” He points at the back of Geralt’s head sheepishly. “No hair.”

Geralt’s jaw tightens, and a muscle starts pulling at the corner of his lips. Usually, when he looks like that, he goes outside for a few hours and comes back home with bloody knuckles and bits of bark clinging to his skin. Except today, it seems, as Geralt deflates in the chair, tension leaving his shoulders. “Fine.”

Jaskier blinks, frowns. “What?”

“I said ‘fine’. Just do the rest like that. It’ll grow back.”

Jaskier bites his trembling lip, guilt flooding him as he sets the clippers against Geralt’s head again.

---

“It’s a bowl cut.”

Jaskier frowns. “No! It’s… a very short undercut.”

“It’s a long bowl cut, Jaskier.”

He chews on the inside of his cheek, fidgeting with his fingers, as he looks at Geralt, who’s staring at his own reflection. “Okay, maybe it is, but… It’ll grow back? Eventually?” He swallows, looks away. “Geralt, I’m- I’m so sorry, I-“

“It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not, Geralt, I fucked up and I’m so s-“

“Jaskier. I said it’s fine.” The Witcher sighs, walking to the bathroom door. “I’m going to bed. Goodnight, Jaskier.” He closes the door a little bit harder than he usually does, and Jaskier flinches.

He sighs, spending the next half hour cleaning the hair from the bathroom floor and brushing it out of the clippers, guilt mulling in his head. When he’s done, he rolls the desk chair back to his own room, sitting down on it heavily. He fucked up, he really did. And there’s no way to fix it, either – Geralt will have to walk around for the next few weeks with, well… basically a bowl cut. A long bowl cut, but a bowl cut nonetheless.

He sighs, leaning his chin on his hand, trying to find some way to fix it, when his eye lands on a crochet hook in his penholder. It’s been a few years since he’s done crochet, but it can’t be that hard, right? He suddenly remembers the box of wool under his bed, and a plan forms in his head.

---

Turns out relearning crochet is hard, and he spends the entire night hunched over his work, pausing and unpausing the tutorial over and over again, clumsy fingers working even clumsier stitches. But by the time the sun rises, he’s done it. He’s managed to make a beanie for Geralt. Of course, he’s not sure if it’s gonna fit – he had to use his own head for measurements and added a few stitches to make it a bit bigger – and the colour is… questionable, but it’s there, in all its uneven and bright yellow glory.

He looks up when he hears Geralt’s door open, and sprints into the hall, nearly bumping into the Witcher’s broad chest. Geralt frowns, looks down at Jaskier’s disheveled clothes, still from the previous day, at the circles under his eyes, and scoffs. “What did you do?”

Jaskier frowns, takes a step back, because being this close to Geralt is making his heart do weird things, and hides his work behind his back. “Why do you always think I’m up to something, Geralt?”

“Because you always are.”

Jaskier nods. “Fair enough.” He sighs, chewing on his lower lip. “Look, I’m sorry for what happened yesterday, I really am. So, I uh… made this. For you.” He holds out the beanie, depositing it in Geralt’s hands, who frowns at the misshapen lump of wool.

“What is it?”

“It’s a beanie.”

“It’s yellow.”

“That’s the only wool I had left.”

“You could’ve just bought one, you know that, right?”

He sighs, rolling his eyes. In all honesty, he did forget about just buying one, but Geralt needs to learn how to appreciate a nice gesture, really. He stretches out his hand, reaching for the beanie. “Look, if you don’t want it, you can give it back.”

His eyebrows shoot up to his hairline when Geralt snatches his hands away from Jaskier’s, clutching the lump of wool against his chest. “No.”

“No, what? No, you don’t want it, or no, you’re not giving it back?”

It’s quiet for a while, amber eyes looking at his face intently. Finally: “Thank you.”

That surprises him even more. “For what? Fucking up your hair or making a shitty beanie?”

Geralt grins, a sight that leaves Jaskier slightly breathless. “For trying.”

Jaskier feels a blush creeping up his cheeks, and smiles. “Well, thank you for putting up with me trying.” Before he can think twice about it, he takes a step forward, planting a soft kiss on Geralt’s cheek. The Witcher merely looks at him wide-eyed, and regret curls in Jaskier’s stomach. He’s about to take a step back to flee back into his bedroom, when Geralt’s hand closes around his wrist, stopping him.

He can only stand there, heart in his throat, as Geralt leans forward, softly kissing him. It’s just a feather-light touch, but it’s enough to leave Jaskier breathless and desperate for more – so when Geralt moves back, Jaskier closes his hand around the back of the Witcher’s neck, pulling him closer again, deepening the kiss this time.

He does have to come up for air, eventually – and regrettably – but the sight of Geralt grinning at him makes up for the lack of kissing. He smiles softly. “You know, Witcher… that bowl cut is actually really growing on me, you sure you don’t wanna keep it that way?”

“Absolutely fucking not.”