#i have never played guilty gear but she's an icon

[kayotic-catgirl]

very quick thing i did of a town shaped alice because i am not immune to peer pressure (especially not from BILLIE HERSELF?!?!??)

[01zfan]

miss you more | s. es

ex baby-daddy!eunseok x reader | 6.6k words

i do NAWT condone having a baby with a man you’re not married to.

contains: sex without a condom (they’re absolute messes DON’T BE LIKE THEM)

you don’t know how you ended up in front of eunseok’s place. even if you were the one behind the wheel, the one shifting the gears, and the one rolling red stop signs you don’t know how you ended up there. you looked out your driver side window to look at the house you used to call your home across the street. atleast you were in your right mind enough to not park directly in front. but you also knew this was just as bad, in a parked car with the lights off across the street like a stalker.

you knew you could’ve gone home. you could’ve put your car back in drive and come back in the morning to pick up your daughter, pretending like this never happened. but you knew yourself better than that, and you knew that the failed date you went on still weighed heavy on your shoulders. 

you turned towards your phone, hoping that something on your device would distract you. but when you opened your phone you saw your lockscreen—your happy little daughter trying to hold a pumpkin the size of her body as you and eunseok helped. you thought about how content you were that day, how you felt like you were truly a happy little family again. you even had a heart to heart with eunseok, talking about how you were too young and just starting your career when you met him. your life was barely on track by the time your daughter came and although you wouldn’t trade her for the world you both humored the idea of meeting later in life. you felt a pang in your chest as you remembered looking down to your daughter who held tightly onto eunseok’s hand while she held her tiny pumpkin in the other. 

the person you went on the date with noticed your wandering mind, it was obvious in the way he cleared his throat after you stared at the picture for a little too long. 

trying to comprehend your relationship with eunseok was difficult. when you were with him you thought about all the shortcomings in your relationship—the lack of communication, hiding your feelings, keeping things bottled up until they exploded. neither of you were able to save your relationship before it was too late, and it could be argued that you two were better apart. but when you weren’t with him, the only thing you could think about was trying to make it work.

you looked at the man sitting across from you at the dinner table and you imagined it was eunseok. maybe it was the familiarity, maybe you shouldn’t have made the mistake of seeing him before going on your date. because now the only thing you could think about was him, if he was going on dates in secret and if he was thinking of you too. you thought about your daughter, how much you wished you were with her instead of pretending the fancy food on your plate was good.

you knew the moment you started thinking about your family that the date was already over. it would be another endeavor in your long list of failures, all you could think about as you sat in your car was how you gave up a day you had with your daughter for this. you deleted your message history with the man, staring at your most recent text conversations. eunseok sat at the very top, his unread message appearing in the form of a tiny blue dot next to his picture-less icon. you clicked on the message thread, revealing a series of pictures of your daughter and little updates through the night.

eunseok: she likes strawberries alot.

eunseok: playing zelda and animal crossing on the big tv.

eunseok: she’s better than me at zelda now.

eunseok: she told me mommy is going on a date?

eunseok: i hope it goes well.

eunseok: she ate all of her food.

you don’t know why you felt guilty reading the last message. eunseok didn’t have the right to know, and you knew that. you had simply told your daughter in passing that you were going on a date night with your friends, knowing that she would repeat whatever you told her to her father. you typed your reply over and over again, trying to figure out what approach to take. 

lol i was going out with some of my friends from wo|

that’s none of your busin|

the date went we|

are you awake?

your mind came up with a million things to say, but none of them felt right. it felt like all of them were attempts at sounding casual. you threw your phone into the passenger seat beside you, and you rolled your neck to try and relieve some of the tension. you let out a sigh and turned your keys in the ignition, letting your car come to life around you.

you pulled out from the parking lot and headed down the road trying to go home. it started off with one wrong turn, your mind confused on where to go from the restaurant. when you had the chance to go back the way you came you felt something take control, and you continued heading down the same road. you took another turn, you even waited at the red light with an unexplainable energy as you tapped the steering wheel. the tension in your neck was gone too as you headed further down the road. 

you knew you didn’t have the right to act confused when you finally turned down eunseok’s road.

you let your head rest against the steering wheel when you parked across the street. each time the thought of leaving your car invaded your thoughts, you gently shook your head, feeling the worn leather of the steering wheel cover against your forehead.

“don’t do it.” you said to yourself.

you looked back at the house again, looking at the window that your daughter was sleeping in. you knew that on the other side of the house you couldn’t see, was the window to the room you used to sleep in. you started thinking about eunseok in that bed by himself, drowning in the california king that was too big even for the two of you. you started thinking about if he thought of you before going to bed everyday, if he thought about you tonight and where you were going in your pretty dress. 

“don’t do it.” you repeated.

saying it a second time was unnecessary. you said it purely for effect, trying to seem like your better senses were trying to put up a fight. you were already taking your key out of the ignition before you finished your sentence. you had taken your first step out of the car when you repeated the phrase again. you cleared the road quickly, hearing your heels click on the paved road with each step. by the time you made it to the sidewalk you had accepted your fate. you were still weary, slowly making your way across the lawn to the stoop. 

when you made it to the small set of stairs you looked to the door in front of you. the last chance you had to go back in your car before you undid all of your hard work. you knew you were being recorded by the ring camera beside the door. you could simply lie if eunseok ever brought it up. you could just say you considered coming to get your daughter before realizing how late it was. eunseok most likely wouldn’t believe you, and you would most likely lie some more trying to tell a convincing story. but your gaze went from the ring camera to the potted plant that stood tall beside you. you looked even lower to the painted rocks that circled the bottom. you let the ring camera catch you crouch down to your heels. the same hand that drove you here picked out the discolored rock that felt hollow. 

you held the rock in your hand, feeling the three engraved letters side by side. you held it away from your shadow, letting the moon illuminate the letters. you laughed to yourself for a moment before bringing your other hand to it, feeling for the split in the middle. it was too easy to slide the fake rock open, and to grab the key to the front door out of it.

you stepped through the door, turning the knob so it closed quietly behind you. you took off your heels at the door, hanging your jacket on the coat rack. you felt like an intruder, walking through the house on the balls of your feet trying to be as stealthy as possible. you lurched past your daughters toys in the living room down the hallway to eunseok’s room.

“don’t do it.” you said one more time putting your hand on the doorknob.

you pushed open the door to eunseok’s room slowly. you cursed at the creaky hinges, only letting it fully open when you saw that eunseok’s bed was empty. you didn’t hear him in the bathroom, so you pulled away from the door. you turned around, looking at the pink door of your daughter’s room. you ran your hand over the paint, remembering the day you spent painting it outside. it was the same day you painted the rocks outside. for some reason you believed eunseok would’ve thrown out the rocks you painted, or atleast replace them with new ones. but everything was the same as you left it all those years ago. 

when you silently opened the door, you saw your daughter take up a majority of the bed. her stretched limbs forced eunseok to the edge—his arm was slung over the side, and he was so close to falling that his hand touched the ground. eunseok was on his stomach and your daughter was on her back, both of their snores filled the room. for a moment pain flashed across your chest, you missed seeing this more than you thought. your own flesh and blood laid next to your shared history that was so suffocating it took your breath away. it was overwhelming and calming, as painful as it was peaceful. 

part of you wanted to stand there for the rest of the night, just watching the two sleep side by side. you were still for a moment, letting your mind replace all the bad memories with the good as you worked up the courage to get closer to eunseok. 

all of your steps towards eunseok were careful, walking on the flat part of your foot to not cause the floorboards to creak. you had your eyes trained on your sleeping daughter, making sure she didn’t open her eyes while you crouched close to eunseok’s body.

when you reached your hand in the space between your chest and eunseok’s shoulder, you hesitated. you were frozen looking at eunseok and his cheek pressed into the mattress and his mussed black hair. you hadn’t seen eunseok like this in god knows how long. after you called things off, eunseok put his stoic resolve back up. he put on a mask for you, a facade of furrowed eyebrows and emotionless stares. you had been deprived of eunseok’s softness you almost forgot it existed. now you crouched next to your ex beside the flower lamp on your daughters dresser resisting the urge to run a finger over his soft parted lips or his smooth skin. you almost didn’t want to wake eunseok up, afraid that you would once again have the gentleness taken away from you. you didn’t know you could miss the view of someone you claimed to hate so much. 

something inside of you wanted eunseok to know you saw him like this, serene in middle of the night just like when you were together. maybe he would even talk to you in the same raspy voice he always used to talk to you in. maybe if you woke him up fast enough you would be able to experience the eunseok you loved before his mind fully woke up to make him robotic towards you again. so you finished reaching across the space, gently touching his shoulder before you let your hand fully cover the area.

you shook eunseok gently at first. his body was limp underneath your hand, moving whichever way you applied force. you looked past eunseok to your daughter, who had at some point moved on her side to sleep like you. you drew in a breath, applying more pressure behind your hand trying to rouse him. finally he did something, letting out a sigh before shrugging his shoulders.

“go back to sleep baby,” eunseok swallowed and turned his head, facing away from you. “we can play zelda in the morning, i promise.” he mumbled.

even if his voice was barely audible, you still clenched your teeth in worry. your daughter was by no means a light sleeper, but all it could take is mentioning one of her favorite things to have her head shoot up in the middle of her sleep. eunseok ignored you trying to wake him up, you had to lean in close to the back of his head.

“eunseok,” you shook him a little harder “it’s me.” you whispered.

as if you yelled straight into his ear, eunseok shot up from the bed. you were spooked, almost letting out a sound when he turned to you with wide eyes.

“what are you doing here?” he sounded lost as he looked around your daughters dark room. “is something wrong?” he asked.

“no i just.” you looked over eunseok’s shoulder to look at your daughter. she was still snoring, but had turned to face her father. if she woke up now she would never go back to sleep. “i need to talk to you.” you whispered.

eunseok looked at the flower-shaped clock hanging on the wall behind you. he squinted his eyes trying to make sure he was reading the time right.

“at two in the morning?” he asked, voice still raspy.

in that moment you realized it was a mistake coming. nothing good as ever happened between you and eunseok after midnight. but you also realized it was too late to go back, and a small voice in your brain convinced you that you weren’t sleeping in your own bed tonight. so you nodded your head again as eunseok carefully move off the bed to not wake your daughter. 

eunseok motioned for you to walk toward shis room but he still led the way. he didn’t care to walk on his tiptoes or avoid the creaky parts of the floor as he rubbed his face. 

you looked back to your daughter once more before closing the door behind you. she moved to the center of the bed, taking up the little amount of space eunseok was occupying. you slowly pulled the door closed until you heard it click behind you. when you turned back into the hallway you saw eunseok past the opening in his door, looking at you through the space. he was no longer tired and he didn’t have his eyes squinted in confusion anymore. he held eye contact with you from his room, almost like he was daring you to come in. the implications made your bare feet timid in the hallway, lingering behind each creak on the floorboards as you crossed the threshold into his room. 

as if you had never been in the room before, you waited by the doorframe as eunseok closed the door shut beside you. he gave you a second to collect your thoughts, leaning against the closed door as he looked down at you. you tried matching his calm, leaning against the wall until the light switch poked your back. when eunseok crossed his arms you breathed in deeply.

“what are you doing here?” he asked.

you didn’t have an answer. all you could do was cross your arms against your chest and avoid his gaze.

“i don’t know.” you answered.

you could hear eunseok let out a dry laugh from beside you. even in the darkness of his room you could make out the framed photo of you two that sat at his work desk. he followed your gaze and cleared his throat when he saw what you were looking at.

“did you enjoy your date?” eunseok asked.

“that’s none of your concern.” you quipped.

eunseok pushed off of the door, and your eyes followed his back as he walked towards his bed.

“i’ll take that as a no.” he said quietly.

when he turned around to face you, you took a step forward.

“i’m seeing him again.” you lied.

the smug look on eunseok’s face didn’t fade away as he crossed his arms again. you saw him lean against your former side the bed, head tilted as he caught onto your lie.

“oh i’m sure.” he said.

you felt the familiar rage blossom in your chest. suddenly you felt regret, reaching behind you for the doorknob.

“this was a mistake.” you seethe.

before you can turn the doorknob, eunseok takes a step towards you. when you turn the doorknob he takes another step. he clears the space between you two, and continues coming closer until you have to look up at him. eunseok moves his hand to clasp over yours on the doorknob. the warmth of his hand coaxes you to let go of the doorknob, and he brings his other hand to hold yours. you can already feel the heat across your cheeks, and you can see the blush dust across eunseok’s face the longer he looks down at you.

you don’t know why eunseok humors you even though you’re no longer together. you don’t know why he takes his time teasing you. you came to him in the middle of the night in a tight short dress after a failed date. he could’ve taken you in the hallway or the couch in the living room, god knows you deserved it. but he was gentle with you, bringing his hand to brush underneath your chin to keep your head tilted up at him.

“you don’t know why you’re here?” eunseok asked again.

you silently shook your head, knowing he’d show you why. he looked at your lips, and eunseok pressed his leg between yours. the movement made your dress ride up. you remembered that eunseok bought you this dress when he let go of your hand to reach for the zipper. he still remembered that he had to hold the fabric straight to get the zipper to work, and he pulled it down in one smooth motion. you got up from the wall to aid him, and you didn’t protest when the dress became loose on your skin. you only continued to look up at eunseok, feeling your eyes become glassy as the fabric pooled to your feet.

“you still don’t know?” he asked quietly. 

eunseok brought his fingers to run over the trim of your bra, letting out a sigh when you tilted your head back in approval. you didn’t have to answer eunseok for him to know your response. he only laughed, teasingly bending down past your lips to kiss your shoulder.

when eunseok moved to your neck you brought your hands to his shoulder. you kept him there, letting your legs bend slightly to rest some of your weight on his leg. he was strong underneath you, the flexing muscle in his thigh made you want to grind against him. before you could do anything else, eunseok worked his kisses up to your ear then completely pulled away.

“let’s go to the bed.” he said.

you complied immediately, making your way to your old side of the bed as eunseok walked around. 

both of your stood next to the bed, staring at the other. you waited for his instruction, but eunseok stared at you waiting for your next move. it made you swallow your nerves, and you reached behind you to undo the clasp on your bra. eunseok watched you fully clothed on the other side, completely still as you moved to your underwear. eunseok watched you push your underwear past your knees, until you could step out of them. 

as you brought your arms to cross against your chest, eunseok let you watch as he pulled his shirt over his head. you looked at his toned stomach, how he ran his hand down his body before getting to the waistband of his sweats. you moved from foot to foot, trying to not make it obvious how much of a mess you were already becoming. it felt like the first time again, both of you trying to remember what your bodies looked like now. you had stretch marks like tiger stripes now, and eunseok had grown into his body. you no longer felt like the young adult you were when you first met him as eunseok pulled down his sweats to reveal his white briefs. as he reached for the waistband he motioned to the bed, silently telling you to get on first.

you pressed your hands into the foam and crawled to eunseok’s side. you sat back on your legs, perched and ready to listen. eunseok grabbed your hand that was balled up at your sides, kissing your palm after spreading out your fingers. you wanted to press your hand into his toned stomach and travel down until you could squeeze his length over the fabric of his underwear, but you let eunseok kiss every single one of your knuckles as he kept burning eye contact with you. when he let your hand fall back to the bed he reached into the top drawer of the night stand. when your mind caught quickly on you shifted on your knees.

“i’m not seeing anyone.” you said quickly.

“what about your date?” eunseok asked.

you shook your head, hoping that eunseok wouldn’t make you say it out loud. the smug smile that blossomed across his face was enough of a response.

“so no condom?” he teased.

eunseok eyed you carefully as he put the foil packet back down on his dresser. he watched you shrug your shoulders and look away, focusing on fluffing his pillows. he sits back on his haunches as he watched you get comfortable laying on your side. it’s been too long since he’s seen you like this, naked and getting ready for him. seeing the line of your body settle on his sheets makes eunseok want to tell you how much he changed. how he’s not the same twenty-year old who broke your heart by hiding his feelings. he wants to tell you that he’s a responsible adult now, and that his therapist tells him every session he’s making real progress. 

when you settle onto the mattress you turn to face him. eunseok notices how you fail to hold eye contact with him longer than a second before turning away. your hand that was rubbing up and down your body goes to fraying thread on the sheets, and your eyes dart away to focus on the wall behind eunseok.

“hurry before i change my mind.” you were anything but convincing. your words had no bite as you patiently waited for eunseok to fall into his place beside you. “you should be thanking me. god knows when’s the last time you had sex.” you said.

even if you tried to seem threatening, eunseok saw your body seize in anticipation when he shifted on the bed. he took his time, going to his back first to fully take off his underwear. he enjoyed seeing you trying to take quick peaks over your shoulder to look at his bare body and hearing your nails scratch the sheets to try and collect yourself. 

eunseok put his hand on the side of your knee when he shifted his body again. he ran his hands up slowly, his touch light as a feather to try and make bumps erupt across your skin. eunseok scooted his body closer to yours, his arm that was between his body and the mattress fell into place underneath your neck. 

the two of you went into your old routine, muscle memory of your past together in bed guided your movements. you both told yourselves your bodies were acting on their own accord. that was the excuse echoing around in both of your heads as you scooted your body back to meet eunseok’s and why he pressed a soft kiss to your shoulder blade. you gasped from the feeling, and suddenly the familiarity between you two filled the room. the closeness of your bodies was nearly blinding, you put your hand over eunseok’s that had found it’s place on your ass. 

eunseok foolishly thought that this position would protect him, that not being able to see your face would help him have emotionless sex with you. but feeling your fingers seamlessly intertwine with his made his heart pound against your back. each time he tried to slightly pull back you only followed him, chasing after the warmth of him against you. he thought fast to distract you before you could point it out, he reluctantly separated his hand from yours to lift your leg, making it come over his. the change made you lean forward to put your hand on the mattress to stabilize yourself. eunseok leaned forward, and wrapped his arm that was under you across your chest to bring you close.

“the last time i had sex?” when your leg was locked over eunseok’s, he used his fingers to swipe at your folds. you preened your ass backwards, making a sound of embarrassment at how wet you were. “it was when i came over to help you with your tv, remember?” he whispered.

eunseok let the memories flood over you as both of your bodies shivered. it was months ago, you needed help putting together and setting up the brand new television you got for christmas. you were never much of the handyman, and eunseok wanted an excuse to come over to your new place. so while she was at daycare eunseok was invited over, and just like now one thing led to another until you were on top of eunseok. he remembers trying to kiss your knees that were bruised from being pressed to the ground and you told him to go away. he also remembers after the fact you used the excuse that you were lonely due to the holiday season. but now it was summer and you were moaning for him like you always used to. when eunseok pressed his lips to the side of your face you didn’t tell him to go away, you only turned your head to give him better access.

“you said you hated me then.” eunseok said.

eunseok pushed two fingers into your heat and a satisfied smile spread across his face when your lips parted. he sees you nod your head, trying to form a coherent sentence.

“i do.” you respond.

you can barely get through your sentence without your voice pitching upwards. eunseok feels you attempt to push your hips back to meet hie fingers. 

“you still hate me?” eunseok slips in a third finger to try and change your mind. “after all these years?” he asks.

“i do.” you say, shaking your head.

eunseok talks your mixed signals as a sign he’s doing something right. maybe by the third time you come to him like this he will get you to say no, maybe even have you initiate the kiss first. he uses it as motivation to keep pumping his fingers into your heat, and bringing you closer by his hand that squeezes your chest. 

when you try wedging your hand between your bodies to find eunseok’s dick, he moves out of the way. he shakes his head in the crook of your neck. he imagines the look of frustration on your face, the one that’s seared into the back of his eyelids as he lifts your leg. you fall forward once again from the new angle and eunseok lets you. 

“fuck me please, eunseok.” you whine into the sheets. 

you use the rest of your strength to push your body back to its side and you moved eunseok’s hand down your chest. he can feel your heart jumping in its cage as you continue whining for him. eunseok feels his own heart catch in his throat when he feels your desperate hand reach down to grab his dick again. he separates his clammy chest from your back and watches you grasp at the air to try and find him.

your first touch is light as a feather, as if you’re expecting eunseok to deny another one of your touches. but he only presses his forehead to your back and draws in a breath as you hold him in your hand. after the first pump it’s eunseok who’s whining. he forgot what it was like to be touched by you to the point that he has half a mind to ask you to just jerk him off like this. maybe he’ll turn you around, just so he can see your eyes blow out with lust as he finishes over your fist. maybe he will stay in this position, moaning and leaving bruises and bites along the planes of your back and shoulders to let out his frustration. but just like always does he keeps his thoughts to himself and lets you decide what you want. when your other hand pull eunseok’s fingers out of you, he leans forward and lets his hard dick press against your ass.

both of you are so desperate your movements become rushed. eunseok ruts his dick into your fisted hand from the haste, and you start spreading his precum around his tip. you pump his length a few times, just wanting to hear the content sighs and quiet gasps as eunseok tries to hold back his moans. you continue to do it, letting the slick sounds of his precum between your hands fill the room until his sighs turn to quiet whines. 

“turn around.” eunseok kisses your shoulder, pressing his lips into your skin to muffle his words. when you say nothing and only continue pumping him he pulls his head back. “look at me.” he begs.

you ignore him, even though you both know you can hear. you both know that the position you’re in currently is too intimate for people who claim to hate eachother. you both know that eye contact is dangerous, that it will only bring back feelings you both put so much energy into denying. so eunseok lets you ignore him and plays off his pleads by lightly biting your skin. you moan from the pain that lights your body like a fire, and eunseok puts his hand over yours to guide his dick the rest of the way.

“ready?” eunseok asks.

eunseok says it just as quiet as his previous plead. when you nod and whimper out a yes he feels his heart drop. he knows it was an act of self preservation, but he wished to see your face. he was forced to settle for his imagination and your sounds when his tip prodded past your entrance, and he settled for your tightening grip on the sheets as he pushed in every inch until his hips kissed yours.

you sucked him in and kept his dick in place, fitting around him like a glove. there was no better feeling in the world, nothing tasted better than the salt from your skin that stayed on eunseok’s lips. he put his hand on your ass to spread you out enough to draw his hips back. he heard your nails drag across the mattress and he felt you grab his hand on your chest to steady yourself. he slid back in just as slow, cursing each time your walls sporadically seized around him. 

it had been too long. eunseok was actively abandoning all of his inhibitions feeling you around him. he felt himself caring less and less about not wearing a condom the louder you got.

“i’m gonna cum if you keep clenching around me like that” he grunted into your shoulder.

eunseok moved his hand on your ass to press his hand deep into your lower stomach, causing you to push your hips further back. he swore he could feel himself inside of your stomach, and the sound that ripped from your throat made him believe you felt it too. the new angle let eunseok push his hips further into you. you could no longer hold your head upright as you let it fall into the pillows to muffle your sounds. but even with your broken moans and grabby hands you held back, trying to keep some shred of your dignity.

eunseok lifted his head to try and look down at you. he could see your eyes closed from the pleasure, and the thin sheen layer of sweat that glistened across your face. the tiny beads of sweat and your supple skin caught in the moonlight. eunseok bent down to kiss your cheek, trying to entice you to turn your head again. for the second time, eunseok could tell you were ignoring him. he forgot what you were trying to protect yourself from as he felt your walls seize around him again. you were becoming even more sporadic, and your breaths were turning into quick huffs. when your hand tightened over his, eunseok used his leg to raise yours even more. his hand on your stomach found your clit quickly, rubbing circles that complimented his thrusting. you finally turned your head from the mattress, you even turned a little further to look eunseok in the eyes.

“i’m so close, seok.” you whispered.

eunseok saw you close your eyes and catch your bottom lip between your teeth, another telltale sign of you trying to focus. you dragged his hand that gripped your chest to your neck. eunseok’s eyes that were focused on your face flitted down to your neck. his eyes widened looking down at your hand pulsing over his, shocked at you trying so desperately to take the tenderness from this moment. if eunseok squeezed his hand around your neck like you wanted, it would be easy for you both to claim this was simply just a horny mistake, a borderline hate-fuck. he made that mistake the first time—with a hand around your neck he told you how much he hated you. he looked into your eyes when he said it, trying to revel in the way your eyes flashed in pain between the moments of bliss. he didn’t mean it then but he definitely didn’t mean it now—like he said before he has changed. 

so instead of pressing his fingers into the veins on the side of your neck he traveled up to your chin, turning your head so you were forced to look at him. you were shocked, eyes so wide and your face so close to his that eunseok could see himself in the reflection of your pupils. he placed a kiss right on your lips, not pulling back until he felt your lips move against his. he saw himself in your eyes again, and he sees his spit glistening on your lips. he feels himself inside of you, and he feels your warmth cover his entire being.

“i think i was made for you.” 

eunseok meant to say it quietly just for himself as a silent realization, but the way you nod makes him believe it to be true. eunseok feels you get your strength back as you push your hips backwards to meet his hard and deep thrusts.

“you still are.” you moaned.

he tells himself that you are just talking to fill the void of silence. eunseok also tells himself that you can’t bring yourself to ignore him for the third time this night when you’re looking him right in eyes. regardless, eunseok can also feel himself getting closer as you clench repeatedly around his twitching dick.

“oh my god.” you moan.

eunseok pulls your body closer when he feels you shudder against him. you start driving your hips back without rhythm, trying anything you can to keep the stimulation going. eunseok still looks down at you as you cum, and he smiles at the irony of you trying so hard to keep eye contact. you give into closing your eyes when he slips a finger into your mouth, and he can feel the vibration of your moans around his digit. 

when you start getting weaker, and settling into eunseok’s hold he pulls his hand from your clit to pull out. when you open your eyes again they’re glassy. they’re no longer half lidded as you grab eunseok’s wrist, stopping him from pulling out.

both of you look down at your hand. you look almost as shocked as eunseok, like something came over you to stop him from pulling out. eunseok takes it in stride, pushing back into you with a force that has you moaning around his finger. you turns your head even further to face him. he kisses the apple of your cheek and then your lips, smiling against your pout.

“you want another baby?” eunseok moved down from your cheek to your jaw. “you really wouldn’t be able to get rid of me then.” he whispered once he made it to your ear.

before you could say anything back, eunseok latched onto the skin right below your ear, sucking and pressing his teeth in the area below your jaw. the stimulation made your lower half sink further down onto the mattress, until you were relying fully on eunseok’s strength to keep your body up. memories flood back to eunseok, but the way he still remembers how you sound and respond to everything makes him think he never forgot in the first place. both of your bodies move simultaneously, when he pulls away from your neck you tilt your head to give him access to the other side. you preen your neck towards him, whimpering quietly when he lingers above the spot.

“oh my god.” you start shaking and eunseok feels your nails dig into his skin. “too much.” you whimper.

eunseok turns your head back around to press let his face rest against yours. you still suck around his fingers, and he can feel you turn your head to kiss whatever parts of his face you can reach. you still clamp around him, your cum adds to the lewd sounds that fill the room.

“can i cum inside?” eunseok asks.

eunseok closes his eyes and focuses on everything about you. he hold back until he feels your head nod against his.

“please.” you bring your hand behind you to run through his hair. “i miss you so much” you whimper around his fingers.

“i miss you more.” eunseok whispers.

he doesn’t hold back anymore as he empties into you. he turns to the crook of your neck, sucking harshly at your skin to relieve even more of the tension. when his hips still you take the lead, plating your hand onto the mattress to give your hips more stability. eunseok grips your ass, kneading the flesh desperately to try and ground himself. he pulls away from your skin to whimper into your ear. 

you two can no longer speak, only communicating through the hushed sounds of euphoria. eunseok brings both of his hands to wrap around you, bringing your body as close to his as possible. you can no longer push your hips back from the new angle and that’s exactly what eunseok wants. he forces you both to stay still, to feel all of it—the way his dick pulses inside of you as he cums deep inside of you. even when eunseok gives you all he has, you both stay in that position. you both settle deeper into the bed, catching your breath as your skin doesn’t break contact. 

neither of you want to be the first to speak or to force the other one to come back to reality. so you two remain silent as eunseok pulls out. you don’t say a word when eunseok turns your body around to face him, or when he pulls the covers over your sweaty bodies. he returns the favor by saying nothing when your nestle into his chest and you guide his arm to wrap around your body. 

[dangerous-string-tourney]

Finalist Number 2!

Needless to say she's an absolute icon, and I've seen her described several times as "The girl ever" but can she become "The dangerous string user ever"?

IIIIIIIIIT's BRIDGET!

I've never played guilty gear so I dont know Brisket well but I defintly have a soft spot for her, and clearly so do all of you! sporting a yo-yo (the coolest type of dangerous string) she's blasted through the rounds to land at the final, but will our fighting game girl take the crown? or will she be down for the count? You decide!

[c1028h]

fighting games thoughts

so im writing this waiting for my bus to go to work but I just don't really have anyone to dump my current obsessions so I'm just gonna write here instead. a few months ago I stumbled upon a tiktok video of the game guilty gear strive, but I didn't pay much attention except the fact that the game had some really interesting characters. now, fighting games were always a part of my life, it was a way of connecting with my father since he really enjoyed them too, a few that really stood out in my childhood were killer instinct, mortal kombat (a bunch of them, but mainly the ps3 one),

street fighter, the teen titans game on the cartoon network website, anyway, I loved them. but sometime in my life I stopped playing them and forgot about it, I always saw people playing mortal kombat when the 10 released, and then when the 11 released, but it never sparkled the joy in my to play again (also this thing was expensive as fuck). a few weeks ago I stumbled upon guilty gear strive again on my tiktok, but this time since I'm working I actually have the founds to afford a game on steam lol. I looked it up about some fighting games and got interested in a few of them.. guitly gear strive, tekken 7 and street fighter 5 or 6. now, even though street fighter has some characters I really loved like chunli, cammy, menat, juri, vega, it didn't really sparked anything in me.. tekken at the time was a little strange to me since the game is in 3d and the characters kinda looked like the sims ngl, so the option i had was guilty gear strive, it had some characters I thought it looked cool like bridget, testament, i-no, axl, anji, zato-1, may, anyway, you get the point, the game was also in 2d, which was a little more comfortable to me since all the experience I had was in 2d games, it had a big community of people that could teach me and play with me, so I bought that, the expanded editions to be fancy~. the game is really fun, it has some really cool machanics and its making me see fighting games in a way I never did before, all I did before was smash as much buttons as I could and hope my opponent didn't smashed the buttons before me, but now I'm starting to understand the fundamentals.. blocking, punishing, countering, frame data and all of that, I'm not good by any means, actually I started the online part at floor 6 and now im in floor 3, but thats part of the process I guess.. the problem is, I didn't stopped searching about other fighting games, and that made me regret a bit not buying tekken 7, the community was a lot bigger, it had characters that looked cool but not in a supernatural way, in a normal fighting way, like xiaoyu, lili, leo, katarina, asuka, eddy, hwoarang, lee, zafina, anyway, the list was gigantic, so after a week of debating if I should buy tekken or not I bought it, yesterday.. I didn't had any time at all to play since im in the end of my semester and working everyday on the afternoon (I'm fucking exhausted).. (I did a pause on writing, this is two nights after I started), so.. like I said I bought tekken 7 to try out since the idea of playing was really cool, and it is really cool, but like I said I don't have any fucking time ri3848u83.. but my semester is now ending and im a little free, so I'm using this time that I have to play Yakuza 0 and guilty gear strive, today I started playing with milia rage and I'm kinda obsessed.. a woman that can fight with her hair? that's peak pop diva queer icon to me.. she's like madonna of fighting games tbh.. I'm now really invested in playing more games, I bought the Yakuza collection on gog cause it was extremely cheap and mortal kombat x + 11 at 90% discount, gotta make the pennies I got as a salary count, after that I wanna play resident evil, I used to play re4 with my cousin he was kinda obsessed so we would play a whole weekend of re4 and tony hawk's lol.. I also wanna play devil may cry which is I game I used to own but never played.. anyway I just wanted to dump all these ideas somewhere and thought maybe this is the most appropriate place? I guess..

[aquanutart]

NO MATTERRRRRRRRRR WHAT CHANGES WILL NO LONGER CHANGE ME

IIIIIIIII CAN FEEL THE LIGHT EVEN AFTER THE SUN GOES DOWN!

[guynamedultimax]

What if Kirby had a traditional fighting game?

Listen, I know I should’ve done more “FNF fighting game characters” but i doubt anyone cared for that, and even then I lost a bit of interest, so if you actually cared sorry about that, you can still come up with whatever you want for the characters I didn’t talk about!

That being said, I think all Kirby fans here know Kirby Fighters 2. Personally speaking most of it was just the same as Kirby Fighters Deluxe BUT there were five playable Dream Friends. FIVE. Priority to the Copy Abilities a bit too high, isn’t it HAL? Sometimes it feels a bit barebones if you ask me. So I’m here to discuss what would a non-platform Kirby fighting game be.

THE GAMEPLAY

It’s the same as any basic fighting game, there isn’t really that much that the Kirby franchise can offer to make the genre a bit more varied, and that’s mostly due to the fact that Kirby makes friends wherever he goes and combat is pretty much straightforward in these platforming games, the crazy stuff comes from learning specific moves with each copy ability/character in the games and that’s also true for this game.

THE PLOT

I have quite a few ideas for how this can go:

-It’s a “what if” re-telling of Kirby Star Allies where Hyness’ ritual (somehow) also causes space-time rifts across the entire universe to be generated, pulling in Kirby villains from previous games but also allies, which would ALSO explain Dream Friends in the game’s canon a bit more properly.

-It happens in an AU. Plot would basically be Kirby Battle Royale’s but instead of shooting a loadshit of Kirbies onto Kirby, Dedede would just call upon all of their friends to fight for that cake before things escalate and Dedede loses control of the tournament to greater evils, forcing him to work with Kirby to stop the threat, be it old or new.

-Another AU idea but this time it’s original/based on Milky Way Wishes. Galactic NOVA appears every thousand years above Pop Star’s skies, and everyone tries to fight for the right to get the wish. Villain wouldn’t necessarily be ONLY Marx though, most of the Kirby villains could easily win against him if they get to NOVA and get their wish granted. Which means yes, all plots happen at once and Kirby has to deal with everyone at once.

-The least interesting idea: it’s Kirby Fighters 2′s plot but without tag team duos and with all Kirbies replaced with the roster.

THE ROSTER

Now we’re about to have some fun.

RETURNING CHARACTERS: The Dream Friends (and Kirby, of course)

-First up, all Dream Friends are coming back. You don’t even need to change their movesets that much, just add/tweak things, but just for funsies (and for a specific reason too) we’ll also give them specific copy abilities or more than one to categorize them.

-Kirby is the specific reason. He has the same moveset as his Smash Bros incarnation, although he incorporates more copy abilities (and also super powerful stuff like the Star Rod that he usually uses in endgame fights) in it now due to being a traditional fighting game. And yes, he still has his inhale. Using it will have the inhale be replaced by another move in-game, the closest one to a “neutral special” in the opponent’s arsenal. His copy ability is therefore, Smash Bros. And since the game has multiple super moves, we can make his gimmicks from the Kumazaki games the super moves: his level 1 would be a random Super Copy Ability from Return to Dreamland (cutscene is random everytime but damage is always the same), his level 2 would be using the Robobot Armor to stomp foes around, ending with a giant ground pound/fist to the ground and his level 3 is Hypernova Kirby due to the inhale being one of his most unique properties.

-Meta Knight and Dedede will also have heavy Smash influences but they’ll also use techniques from most of their boss fights, such as Meta Knight splitting himself in four clones temporarily for an attack or Dedede actually pulling out an axe instead of his hammer for some attacks based on his Triple Deluxe incarnation. Their copy abilities would formally be Sword and Hammer but with heavy Smash Bros inspiration. Meta can also call in for the Meta Knights to help him in one of his unique super moves. They’d all be there except for Sailor Dee and Captain Vul (one’s an alternate costume and the other is never seen outside of dialogue text).

-Bandana Waddle Dee’s moveset incorporates both Spear and Parasol, but due to the Spear being his most used tool he’ll be categorized with that.

-Marx is the first character with Unique as its own copy ability due to his arsenal being entirely based on his boss fight. Inhaling Unique characters doesn’t always allow Kirby to get copy abilities but when it happens he usually has their most basic move replacing the inhale. Gooey is in the same situation, but i have no idea what would Kirby get from him as an ability since he’s technically player 2 in the Dark Matter trilogy’s first 2 games. Rick, Kine and Coo would technically be categorized as Unique only because they have Fire, Water and Wind in their moveset. You could say they’d be stance characters while Marx is a zoner and Gooey a rushdown character.

-Dark Meta Knight is categorized as Mirror, and Adeleine (with Ribbon as an assist of course) is Artist. Daroach would be Animal, which is missing since its debut in Squeak Squad, as far as I can remember, but he naturally still retains his moveset of calling the Squeaks to help him.

-It’s pretty easy to categorize Magolor as ESP, and Taranza as Spider, while I have no idea what would Susie’s ability be even. Spark? She is mostly around in the Robobot Armor to be fair. The Three Mage-Sisters would be treated equally to the Animal Friends

THE NEWCOMERS

-NAGO, CHUCHU & PITCH: The other set of Animal Friends. I theorize a moveset revolving around the Cleaning ability like in Star Allies would be easy to make, although it can also incorporate moves from other abilities that have been in Dream Land 3.

-CHEF KAWASAKI: I think it’s safe to say this one is pretty easy to do just like the returning Dream Friends. He has a unique moveset in comparison to Chef Kirby that also has him use Kirby’s Final Smash from Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

-LOLOLO & LALALA: Aside from pushing boxes and Gordos they can be the Ice Climbers of the game, and most importantly one of their super moves could have them fuse into their original form in the anime to reference that further.

-SHADOW KIRBY: A clone (in terms of moveset) for Kirby that lacks the inhale ability and has more attacks based on his appearances in Amazing Mirror (and also on Kirby’s unique ability to split in four in these games) and the Kirby Fighters spinoffs. Simple as it is.

-THE MIDBOSSES: They all play the same as their fights too, so doing a paragraph for each of them would be a bit redundant. I chose to add minibosses in because most of them are pretty iconic among Kirby enemies and some of them are also technically friends of Kirby’s. I picked Bonkers (whose coconut throwing and some special moves could make him different enough from Dedede if you ask me), Mr. Frosty (also because we don’t have an Ice-based character in the game), Buggzy (which I can see being the ultimate grappler), King Doo (because we don’t actually have a Waddle Doo in the roster and he’s technically not only their king but also the most unique of them) and Grand Wheelie (look, I like Wheel as an ability ok? it’s like playing as Sonic in a Kirby game)

-KNUCKLE JOE: Taking stuff from both his Star Allies moveset and his Assist Trophy from Ultimate PLUS a few references to the anime and you have the ultimate Shoto character in the Kirby franchise. Ryu mains, this is the character for you.

-GIM: Look, my three favorite abilities are Yo-Yo, Wheel and ESP, in no particular order, so I HAD to include him and the Grand Wheelie. Magolor covers for ESP enough. This lil fella looks more unique than most of the generic Kirby enemies and even among the copy ability ones he’s always been a bit of an oddball due to being a robot. The trickshots you can do with this copy ability make Gim perfect to camp, so he’d be a pretty good zoner as well.

-TAC: He’s been a Helper in Super Star where he also has an unique moveset. Expanding on it and on Tac being generally a copy ability thief could mean more copy abilities can be implemented in a moveset, probably even more than what Kirby can do. Also his design just screams potential to me.

DLC FIGHTERS

WAVE 1: Spinoff Dream Friends

Cuz these guys have been done dirty by Star Allies’ devs. Elline would be the other Artist character in the game and call for Claycia’s assistance in specific attacks. Prince Fluff would play mostly just like Kirby himself did in Kirby’s Epic Yarn and implement specific transformations in some attacks, ending with the tank one from the end of that game. Then we have Gryll. If you know how to make a Tetris/Puyo Puyo based character in a fighting game then good for you, I absolutely don’t know how. What I KNOW however is that she has a float like Peach’s in Smash Bros and I-No’s in Guilty Gear.

WAVE 2: Dream Villains

These guys would all play exactly like their boss fights. Hyness and Sectonia would remain mostly unchanged while Haltmann in terms of moveset is the same as Susie, just without every non-Robobot move that she has.

WAVE 3: Clash of Blades

THAT’S RIGHT, IT’S ALL ANIME SWORDFIGHTERS. They all pull from their boss fights, but Morpho Knight is gonna be a bit more unique compared to Galacta, Dark Meta and Meta Knight, having in the swordfighter equivalent of Akuma’s Raging Demon. Meanwhile, Dark Matter Swordsman and Galacta Knight are completely faithful to the source material, but they’d probably be a bit nerfed due to Galacta’s universe-breaking powers. (you can bet that if we get the remaining legendary heroes who sealed Void Termina in future games they’d be their own separate Wave 5 DLC pack)

WAVE 4: Revival of Old Faces

Nightmare and Drawcia are back and they’re here to stay! Their movesets don’t really need that much changes. Void however is an entirely different beast. He’d be a mix of Kirby, both Zero incarnations and Dark Matter. His design wouldn’t just be giant orb that switches between Kirby and Dark Matter faces, he’d be Kirby-sized and with legs and stubby lil arms like the pink puffball. And you can bet your ass he’d be broken as fuck.

SKINS

If a character’s appearance changed across the series’ history (like Marx Soul, Girl Blob Gooey, Shoppe Magolor, Mecha Knight, Dark Taranza/Taranza in the Super Kirby Clash games, Masked/Shadow Dedede, Anime!Knuckle Joe, Parallel/Pres. Parallel Susie, EX versions and so on) they’d just be an alternate skin/palette swap for the specific character. Multiple characters of the same species with little changes (like a normal Waddle Dee or Sailor Dee, or literally all Kirby colors including Keeby) are the same. I’m also debating on how Dark Mind would be a skin for Nightmare or if there’d be a skin inspired by him for the Dark Matter Swordsman. Zero and Zero Two would probably be turned into palette swaps/outfits for Void (imagine a white Kirby cosplaying as Zero Two that’d be so cute lol).

ATTACKING ASSIST CHARACTERS

Characters who appear in other characters’ attacks. Like the aforementioned Squeaks, Meta Knights and Claycia. Normal Dark Matter would appear in DM Swordsman’s attacks in some capacity outside of the eye laser and the Gordo Throw would return from Dedede’s previous Smash incarnations alongside the Waddle Dee Throw from Brawl. And naturally Magolor can call in the Lor Starcutter for one of his super moves. I am actually considering giving Tac the ability to throw random items/enemies at opponents, with the Bomber being one of these. It’d be a very RNG attack with the Bomber being the best outcome, blowing on the opponent’s face.

HELPERS

All characters in the game can be called on for an Helper attack, that can help you in some form against the opponent by either damaging or tampering with the opponent or by having you get healed or with some buff. Outside from the playable roster enemies that give you copy abilities would also be Helpers, but the specific ones I’m not so sure on.

BOSSES

Characters you can fight in Arcade mode, in Story mode or in a specific Boss mode. There’d also be a Ganon’s Fury (Hyrule Warriors) inspired mode where you’d play as the bosses pitting them against each other. I specifically picked Dyna Blade, Whispy Woods, Landia, Star Dream, Kracko, Great Edge, Pyribbit, Ice Dragon, Fire Lion, Masher, Grand Mam, Metal General, Kibble Blade and Pon & Con.

STAGES

There’d be quite a lot of stages, but I haven’t thought out specific ones except for Green Greens, Butter Building, a Ripple Star stage, one for Dedede’s castle with stage cameos by Tiff, Tuff and Escargoon from the anime and every final boss’s fighting arena.

THE MUSIC

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is gonna be nothing compared to this one. We’re getting all the important music from all pre-Kumazaki games, all music from Kumazaki games and spinoffs, and online arrangements with focus on orchestral (Desolo Zantas), metal (GaMetal, of course) and EDM (Acid Notation, Qumu and various others), including stuff like Itoki Hana’s vocal arrangements. We’re going all out on this one.

Aaaaand that’s it. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. Stay hydrated.

[ragnaofazure]

Characters that were, or never were.

((Hello! This is a list of characters I have actually played on or off the site (like Discord), wanted to or considered quite strongly but never followed suit to do so or whatever.))

((It will all be under read more; this is a long post! If you are interested? Have fun discovering who was in any corner of my repertoire! The list should not be that extensive! I will reblog it if I added anyone new I could recall and forgot to initially should that happen. These are mostly in some form of chronological order with added notes about what their place is with me and more.))

Yu Narukami - (Persona 4)  

Additional note: (Have to biasedly put him first at the top and say how he was my true first muse here, lasted literal years. All my experience comes from him and his blog. He reached nearly 1k followers between both regular and not safe blogs, my true labor of love lost to me deciding to deactivate the blog. Some know me from him originally! You all know who you are!))

Sal (or “Syake”/”Syake-san”) - (Wadanohara and the Great Blue Sea)

Additional note: (My first attempt at a second character and his blog did kinda work for a while, getting a lot of interactions during the original Funamusea craze back in the day. First time playing a truly well evil character and learned lots. His blog eventually died down and faded, but it was an experience I haven’t forgotten.)

Nepgear - (Hyperdimension Neptunia)

Additional note: (A standalone blog attempt again, flopped hard due to how the fandom seemed to have it’s problems on the RP side as well as my own personal reservations (met some couple of awesome people there still around me today though!). One of the most ways to trash a character by a series that had a bit of an identity crisis in the writing department as the years went on. Still not over how hard they literally screwed this good girl over. Every single time.)

Iku Nagae - (Touhou Project)

Additional note: (Part of an incredibly failed multimuse project (that Nepgear was the face of and part of as well for that matter after her blog flopped) and she never got to really experience light of day. I had only the idea of how I wished to portray the character and I still do, but at the same time, I have no idea if it would have earned me the most interactions, admittedly. All due to how passive she is.)

Varus - (League of Legends)

Additional note: (Me having a thing for characters with tragic stories of loss? Are doomed as if fittingly to pay for their sins and as a cost for the tools to live and revenge? He spoke to me way before Ragna. I knew how I wanted to write him, give him flair given his character, which other Champions I wished for him to interact with soon... I had a much clearer idea. But ultimately, also part of the doomed multimuse blog that never took off.)

Goomy - (Pokémon)

Additional note: (No gijinka, only small, sticky bby that I debatably would never allow to evolve and, of course, could talk. Best Dragon type line to ever exist don’t even @ me okay. It’s just... cute. The anime really made it stick out and I loved it. I always also have loved essentially weaker characters and creatures a lot, thus... It resonated with me greatly and idea of how I was going to go about him (yes, had decided on male for it). Again, multimuse failed, so he went away with it.)

Karol Capel - (Tales of Vesperia)

Additional note: (Weak that could be truly strong when overcoming his fears, and that resonated with me given how I consider myself a coward in real life. I also have a thing also for playing characters everyone finds annoying to make them look better when they should not be as disliked too. And once more, multimuse, gone with it, never found a place to remotely discover if I would have also wanted to play him at large either too.)

Elphelt Valentine - (Guilty Gear)

Additional note: (I don’t need to say anything, most of you knew her enough! Blog flopped hard and I couldn’t find the activity I desired. Why I played her? Just... bubbly sweet girl that didn’t want to act on her capability to be deadly as a Gear and only wished for happiness, I liked all that sugar with that depth I tried to give her. As of recent times, Tumblr locked me out and I could not log back in. I sort of took it as a message as to why I maybe shouldn’t try with secondary blogs to a big degree.)

The Masochistic Admiral/Commander/Master(?)/Doctor(?) - (Kantai Collection-Azur Lane (Maybe even Fate and Arknights???) )

Additional note: (So this is a nameless original Admiral/Commander character by the artist known as “Yamamoto Arifred” (look up on danbooru tags under Kantai Collection alongside). I absolutely fell in love with this guy. How I wish it was possible to play him further then I did, I revisit the art work every so often and every day I recall why I liked him so, so much. He’s just beyond amusing, wacky, outright insane and nonsensical in many good shapes and forms. But he only wants one thing: All under him to succeed and become the best they can be under his very questionable yet effective command. I could go on and on but this is already long enough. Standalone blog, flopped due to lack of activity.)

Thief (”Touzoku”) Arthur - (Million Arthur series)

Additional note: (Super unknown series, super unknown plot, I only met all the characters via the available and uncared for fighting game... And her backstory plus design gave me so many ideas I wanted to play around with as a thief wielding a goddamn Excalibur. Of the first characters I said I wanted to play on impulse alone, but who would have cared? Where could she have fit? It was the bigger discouraging thoughts. I have some icons still... But as always, the hesitation from impulse in itself.)

Hassan of the Serenity - (Fate Prototype/Fragments - Grand Order)

Additional note: (Best Assassin, best girl, only Servant that has brought me to tears in this extensive series, for the love of anything holy let her be happy I swear to God, everything about her cuts me so deep, I can’t deal with it every time I think about it ...I’m calm. But really. She touched me so, so deep. I was normally indifferent for so many years about Fate until I stumbled upon the Prototype duology, and subsequently, the Fragments side. After learning her origins and more, her wishes... I can’t state it enough. I am passionate about this girl. She deserves the world. And I would have loved to give her the best if I got to write her.)

Peri - (Fire Emblem Fates - Heroes)

Additional note: (What everyone sees as an annoying, questionable character and way more, I see as yet another pick for me with great potential to try and develop to be liked more by many, for she is not completely disposeable. I had ideas and wanted to take her further while still having her not lose the tendencies she has, because that would be breaking and disregarding character, but sadly, Peri never as much as left my constant thoughts then trying to privately sample around for myself, would have loved to, though. Very.)

Sigurd - (Fate Grand Order)

Additional note: (Amazing design, amazing voice... Literal definition of: “Do it for her”, loves his partner despite their fate... Incredibly underrated man. He is simply the best and I was interested in finding footing to play him, as he deserves to be noticed more for just being... Simply amazing. There is not much more to say than that, he is cool and that is final. Don’t even fight me on these cold, hard facts.)

[skywillsometimeswrite]

Pieces of Glass Ch. 1

Read it on AO3

The Angry-Comforting Mother

Scar knew his "magic crystals" were absolutely worthless, just shards of glass he spent way too much time making look good so he could really sell the wizard vibe he was going for this season. The whole thing annoyed Grian, too, so that was an added bonus. It was fun, and Scar didn't really care if Grian didn't play along with his magic bit as easily as some of the other hermits. What Scar wasn't prepared for, though, was finding out that Grian was a huge hypocrite, and the wings that appeared on his back are a dead giveaway. 

Grian: you ready dude?

The beep from his communicator made him jump, causing him to drop the diamond helmet he had been enchanting. He flinched at the loud clang it made against the floor before picking it up again, looking closer at the small glowing runes etched into it. His Galactic was getting better, he figured, since he was able to recognize when the useful enchants were placed on his gear. None of which were on this helmet. He shrugged and fitted it on top of his wizard hat before pulling out his communicator to reply.

GoodTimeWithScar: You bet! Let’s go get ourselves some wings!

iskall85: you two are going into the end? alone? you guys are so going to die.

Grian: no way. not until i have an elytra in my enderchest

Grian: then i can die

GoodTimeWithScar: I’d rather avoid dying as much as possible.

ZombieCleo: can’t wait to see how that goes for you scar

Grian: im outside larry

Sure enough he heard a rock land on the ground next to him, thrown in from his doorway -- that was missing his door, for some reason -- and when he looked over the edge of the ladder he saw the iconic red sweater underneath the diamond armor. He didn’t understand how Grian could wear that in the jungle, when it was always so hot and humid. Scar was uncomfortable as it was, and he wasn’t even wearing pants! At least, he didn’t, most of the time. The armor was not making him sweat any less over his robe, though.

He quickly scurried down the ladder, jumping the rest of the way onto the slime blocks below to greet Grian with a smile. “Hello!”

“Hey Scar. You ready for this?”’

“Yes! Dude, I miss my wings so much.” Grian chuckled in agreeance and pulled out his communicator, presumably to look up the coordinates for the Stronghold. Then Scar remembered: “Oh, before we go, I prepared these for us.”

He handed Grian three small crystals: one green, one red, and one a pale orange. Grian held them in his unoccupied hand, staring at them with a confused glint in his eyes. He looked at them closer, testing how the light reflected off them, then looked at Scar unimpressed. “Bits of glass?”

“What? No! They’re magic crystals!”

“Dude, these are just shards of glass you sanded down. Great craftsmanship, but, like, these are totally worthless.”

“No they’re not. They’re- they’re magic! See, the red one gives you a health boost, the green one gives a little extra luck, and then the orange one-”

“Just sits uselessly in my inventory taking up valuable end-loot space? Yeah, thanks, but no thanks, dude.” He tossed the crystals back to Scar who scrambled to catch them midair before starting to walk away.

“W-Wait! They’ll be helpful!” He caught up to walk side by side with his friend, holding out the shards to him again. “Come on, Grian, trust your friendly neighborhood wizard, huh? The End’s a dangerous place and we can’t fly to get around yet so we could use all the help we can get, right?”

Grian gave one last look at the “crystals,” then to the man trying to scam him out of inventory space. Scar was giving him that look. That “I can do no wrong and I will win everyone over in the end” look that Scar had realized worked just as well on Grian as it had on Cub and Doc in the past. With a long sigh and an overdramatic groan he took the glass shards from the wizard. “Fine. But if I run out of room these are the first things getting tossed into the void.”

Grian led them to the stronghold, having gotten the coordinates from Xisuma after he had ventured in with Tango a few days ago. They made idle chat, Scar pointing out little observations, but their trek was mostly silent as Grian was focused on making sure they didn’t get turned around in an extraordinarily unremarkable section of the jungle with no orienting landmarks other than trees, trees, and more trees.

After guiding them through the greenery, a boat ride, and getting only a little turned around in the Stronghold, they stood above the end portal. Scar did one last check through his inventory, making sure he had his water bucket, a pumpkin, some food, and, of course, his magical crystals. Satisfied with his preparedness he looked over at Grian, opening his mouth to ask if he was ready to go, but he stopped when he saw the other man’s glare that looked like he was trying to rip the portal into atoms with his mind.

“Uh, if you stare into it for too long you’ll get dizzy.” Scar offered, noticing how Grian’s glare only faltered when he blinked, morphing into one of poorly hidden concern. “Everything alright?”

“Uh, yeah. Of course it is.” The smile Grian gave was strained and he didn’t look Scar in the eyes as he spoke, glancing between the spot behind him and the portal. “Are we certain that the dragon’s already been killed?”

“I don’t see any reason it wouldn’t be. Usually if the portal’s activated it means one of the hermits have already gone in.” He paused for a second, but when Grian’s concern didn’t fade he followed up: “That means the dragon’s been defeated, yes.”

“That’s good.” Silence dragged on between them for a few awkward moments before Grian decided to elaborate on that. “W-We don’t have to deal with that, I mean. It’s good we don’t have to deal with that.”

Scar rested a hand on Grian’s armorer shoulder, looking down at him with what he hoped was a gentle, comforting look. “It’s okay to be scared of the End, Grian. It’s a scary place! But that’s why none of us ever go in alone. We watch each other’s backs. And I’ll watch yours with all of my magical ability.” He placed his other hand on his own chest, standing proudly and attempting to fill the other man with his own confidence.

Grian’s eyes grew distant at Scar’s words, their dark color glassing over in a way Scar had never seen before, but it was gone almost as quickly as it appeared. Grian gave Scar a small smile, it much less forced than his previous one. “Yeah, you guys are cool like that. Come on, let’s not waste any more time. We have wings to find and flying to be done.”  The small hermit’s grin was wide as he gripped Scar’s arm with a firm hand and pulled them both into the starry, inky blackness awaiting them.

Scar wasn’t foreign to the feeling of being transported to the End, the strange tingling, numbing feeling that came with travelling beyond the overworld. It wasn’t like transporting to the Nether, which felt like weights were dropped onto your shoulders and took some time to get used to again if you hadn’t experienced it for longer than a week.  The End didn’t feel kinder than the Nether, per se, but it was calmer, at least until you saw the endless void below you that would swallow you and your items up if you made one misstep.

This time, though, as Scar materialized into the dimension he almost believed he stepped into the wrong portal, as an unfamiliar feeling covered him. It pulled at his hair and flowed underneath his armor and circled around his arms. He wasn’t alarmed by it, entranced more than anything, and he felt whatever it was slip down his arms and off the tips of his fingers, leaving him almost reaching for it, as soon as Grian appeared at his side.

Scar stood there, staring dangerously towards the main island from the platform they were on, and tried to wrap his mind around what had just happened. A hand waving in front of his face snapped him out of his trance, his eyes blinking furiously to return the moisture they desperately lacked. He rubbed at them with his hands for a moment but then looked at them and tried to imagine the feeling wrapping itself around his fingers again.

“Scar? Dude? You good?”

Grian’s higher pitched voice was like a needle popping the balloon of dense fog that had surrounded Scar’s thoughts. He blinked a few more times, shaking his head, and looking down at his friend whose hand was still lingering in the air.

“Yeah. I’m fine. Guess it's been longer than I thought since I was in the End. Caught me off guard, that’s all.” Scar rubbed the back of his neck, patting the hairs down that were still raised.

Grian narrowed his eyes at Scar for a brief moment, as if to deduce if he was lying, before letting out what he hoped was a sigh of relief. Grian turned to face the main island, shoving a pumpkin over his head, and made his way across the rickety path that Tango and Xisuma had made. Scar wordlessly followed behind and paid special attention to where his feet landed.

Hours passed by them, friendly banter was shared, but they were getting tired. Grian all but pushed Scar into building the next bridge, and he carefully placed cobblestone slab one after the other. The mindless task he had done several times in the span of the last few hours left his mind to wander. And it wandered right back to the feeling he had when he entered the dimension. He wanted to know what it was. He had experience with stuff like the Vex in the past, but it had felt nothing like the overwhelming surge of power that he had come to know with that magic.

This had felt gentle, yet purposeful. Powerful, but cradling. It was like a mother’s hug when comforting a guilty child for breaking her favorite vase because they had played baseball inside when she had told them not to. It was unwarranted, unexpected, yet it was comforting, but foreboding because you didn’t know how long it would last or when it would change, if it would change. Scar knew, deep down, he should be terrified, but he could only find intrigue in it all.

“Scar.” Grian’s quiet voice once again grounded him, Scar was noticing this trend, and he looked up only to feel his heart stop in his chest. He was standing on a lone slab that was disconnected from the rest of his bridge. Grian stood on the rest of the bridge, pickaxe in hand and mischievous grin on his face.

“Oh geez! No, no!” Scar yelped, placing down some more blocks in his white-knuckled grasp. The devilish snickers from the other made a smile creep on his face, and when he looked up he saw the path repaired. “Y’know, I’m a magic man, but I’m not that magic.”

They returned to silence again, it comfortably hanging over them. Scar stood up from his hunched position to stretch his back, and felt his stomach twist at the drop that awaited them without the bridge. He glanced over at Grian, the other man lazily staring at the cobblestone beneath him.

“Do you have your lucky crystal on you?” Grian’s eyes shot up to meet Scar’s and his hand rummaged in his pocket until he pulled out the shards of glass that he had given him earlier. Scar smiled and went back to his bridging. “Thank god, I was worried that-” A green glint of color sped past the corner of his vision and his eyes followed it as it fell into the void below, face contorting in what he could only assume was comical fear by the way Grian laughed at him. “No! Dude! That was magic, man! You just brought bad luck upon us!”

“No, no, no. We’ll be fine. What could possibly go wrong?”

Scar’s grips on his blocks tightened at that, something itching at the back of his mind and making his nose wiggle. “At least- At least hold the health one.” He told him, exasperated, as he shook off his uncertainty.

“Okay,” was the simple response he got, and before he could utter a thanks he spotted a red dash fly near him.

He knew it was just glass. He knew that, realistically, they didn’t actually do anything. It was all a bit. A little bit of fun annoying Grian by insisting that these shards of glass actually had magical properties. 

And yet he still reached out to grab it.

Something told him to.

Something told him not to let it fall into the void below him.

That something left him as soon as his hand wrapped around the red shard, and his feet slipped from the platform.

“Scar-!” was the last thing he heard before the rushing wind invaded his senses and whatever had come over Scar was ripped away as he felt nothing beneath him. He managed to spin and look up at the quickly retracting bridge he had just spent the last few minutes building so this very thing wouldn’t happen.

“Grian! Help!” He didn’t even hear his own useless, panic laced cries as he quickly fell away from the sound towards his painful death. He knew Grian couldn’t do anything. They hadn’t found an elytra yet. Grian was just as helpless as he was in this situation.

Scar gripped the crystal to his chest, wishing it had been the green one instead, and shut his eyes, bracing himself for the suffocating feeling of dying in the void. Why did Grian have to throw away the glass? Why did he have to try and catch it? Why couldn’t he have let it fall? They were useless, anyways. They wouldn’t save him now.

Against the encroaching darkness that was consuming him, a bright yellow light managed to make it’s way past his eyelids. He cracked one eye open but opened both as he saw something shining a bright golden color right behind his now faraway bridge. He distantly felt the feeling of the calm-angry mother tugging at the crystal in his hands.

Something was falling off the bridge now, towards him. It was falling incredibly fast and was incredibly big, and it took Scar way too long to realize that it was his fellow Hermit. Panic spread through his body tenfold at this realization. No! He thought. Both of us don’t need to die! As Grian got closer and closer to Scar at speeds that didn’t make sense, Scar noticed that the other’s back was… glowing?

Before he could make any sense of this observation, the faux wizard felt the breath in his lungs ripped from him, leaving him gasping painfully. He shut his tearing eyes against the pain that blossomed in his chest, and attempted to curl in on himself. His mind was overwhelmed with his own near death, that he completely forgot about Grian’s impending one.

It would be painful, much more than it was now, and long, but at least he would have an excuse to lay in bed for a few days while his internal wounds healed. That was the worst part of dying to the void, how it killed you from the inside out. That and that there was no way to retrieve what you lost. He would have to get all his good gear back, but he was used to that. He distantly realized he would have to come back, unfortunately, and most likely soon if he was going to get an elytra.

It felt like he was being stabbed through the throat, chest, and stomach all at once with a barbed, poison-tipped blade. Part of him wondered if his health boost crystal was actually working and prolonging his pain by healing him. It didn’t really matter, he didn’t think he could get his hands to let go of it at this point if he wanted to.

Next thing he knew, what little breath he had left was knocked out of him and a firm warmth surrounded him. Huh, well that’s new. The weightlessness that he had been experiencing had disappeared and a nauseating feeling flipped his stomach as he coughed up his lung trying to breath again. Have I already respawned?

Scar slowly opened his eyes only to be greeted with red, not the comforting purple and brown of his bed in Larry’s shell. He figured that the air was still as thin as it was in the End, because he couldn’t seem to catch his breath. He was pressed up against the soft, red whatever, and the hand not holding the crystal gripped it weakly. 

As soon as it felt as if he was finally breathing comfortably again, the air was knocked from him for the third time in what he could only assume was the last ten seconds. He rolled away from whatever he had been by, his armor no doubt denting at the way he bounced along the hard endstone. When he came to a stop he simply stared up at the void-sky and decided to focus on the chorus flowers instead. It took yet more coughing and shaky breaths before he was breathing easily and Scar finally processed what had just happened. Or rather the fact that he had absolutely no idea what had just happened. 

He had just been falling, hadn’t he? He had just been falling, with no elytra, into the void after he basically jumped in after a useless piece of stained glass that his end busting partner, who also had no elytra, had thrown. He had felt himself dying in the void. He knew he had. And yet here he was, lying on the uncomfortable, uneven endstone.

He groaned and slowly propped himself up on his elbows, making a note that he was indeed still holding the red glass in his hand so at least that venture hadn’t been in vain. His head spun at the new orientation but it didn’t last long and he was scanning his surroundings. He spotted the narrow cobble bridge he had built but felt his heart stop when he saw no red-sweater clad, crystal throwing Hermit standing on it. “Grian?” He rasped, his throat raw, as panic started to seep into him.

A groan from his left caught his attention and his head snapped over to look at the culprit and gaped. Propped up on his hands a few blocks away was the familiar, unmistakable features of Grian: red sweater, blonde hair, short stature. Scar wasn’t occupied with the fact that his friend was there completely fine, no that was normal, what wasn’t normal was the giant golden feathered wings that sprouted from the small hermit’s back.

Scar’s near death experience was completely forgotten, and he felt what was becoming a familiar sensation tug at the back of his collar when he began connecting pieces without fully understanding how they fit together. Grian was the only other hermit here, and he was clearly the one in front of him. It was undeniable and yet completely unbelievable. Scar had been presumably carried by something red and warm back up to the island he was laying on now from at least 100 meters below it. Grian had a red sweater, was definitely strong enough to carry the twig that was Scar, and had gigantic wings that looked more than capable of making the treacherous journey from death.

The other pushed himself up to sit on his knees and his eyes slowly opened. Scar made a strangled noise as he noticed the white glow that faded from them and returned them to their usual dark brown.

Grian’s head snapped over to him. “Scar! Oh my god, Scar are you okay?” His voice was echoing with worry. Literally. There was a reverb to it that garbled his words. Grian must have noticed this since he slapped a hand over his mouth.

“I…” Scar didn’t have words, his mouth dry and mind too blank to think of closing it. He blinked. “Yeah.” He said lamely, his voice pitched three octaves to high.

Silence covered them as Grian seemed hesitant to speak and Scar was still wrapping his mind around everything. Why did Grian have wings? Why had Grian’s eyes been glowing? Why did his voice sound like that? Was all of this actually normal? Did Scar just not see Grian nearly enough during last season to know this about him?

“Uh,” Grian mumbled behind his hand, shoulders falling from his ears when it didn’t come out like a bad feedback loop.

“So,” Scar tacked on, finally closing his mouth. He tried to think of a proper way to go about this but his brain was apparently still fried since all he managed was: “What just happened?”

“I don’t know!” Grian quickly responded, throwing his arms up in the air above him.

“You have wings?”

“I just saw you falling and-”

“Is this normal for you?”

“No! Well, I mean, I guess I panicked and-”

“Why were your eyes glowing?”

“My eyes were what?” Grian’s voice matched Scar’s in a panicked pitch. He sat up on his knees, patting the sides of his head.

“They were glowing. They aren’t anymore though.” Scar quickly reassured him, sitting cross legged and facing him. They shared a staring contest of sorts, Scar searching for answers and Grian’s expression providing none. “So, wings, huh?”

Grian sat up straighter, head swiveling to look behind him at the appendages that were attached to his back. Scar couldn’t see his face from the angle, but the way he hesitated when reaching back to touch them and how he flinched back when he barely grazed the feathers made him wonder if they hurt. Grian had gotten as close as Scar had been to the void, after all. Scar flipped the red glass in his hand, almost offering it to the other as a way to lighten the mood, but stopped when he remembered it was these stupid things that caused this whole ordeal in the first place. Grian turned away from his wings, hands curled up in his lap. He stared at the endstone and Scar glanced between it and Grian, trying to find whatever it was the other was looking for. He didn’t find it, though, because Grian stood up and offered a hand to help Scar up.

They both seemed shaky as Scar stood, and Grian made sure he didn’t fall as soon as he was on his own two feet again. Looking down at Grian, his wings didn’t look nearly as big. He wondered if they had shrunk or if it had been perspective the entire time. He also noted that the golden color they had been had dulled significantly to a pale yellow.

“Do you think you can make it back home without falling off another bridge?” Grian asked quietly, a steadying hand still on Scar’s arm as he looked up at him with concern.

“Uh,” Now that Scar was standing, and attention had been dragged away from Grian’s sudden transformation, the weight of what had nearly happened hit him like a falling anvil. His chest and throat still burned, his head pounded with a headache right behind his eyes, and his stomach felt like it was sloshing around inside of him. The hand that held the “crystal” was beginning to cramp and he wiggled the glass into a pocket on his robe under his armor. He took a deep breath in from his nose and let any remaining tension in his body fade and gave Grian as reassuring of a smile as he could manage. “Yeah, I think I’ll be fine.”

Grian looked relieved, giving him a nod. “Good, then you head back.”

“What about you?”

Grian walked back out onto the bridge that Scar had built what felt like hours ago and looked down at it, pulling out some blocks from his inventory. “I’m gonna keep going and see if I can find anything.”

“What? Alone? Grian, there’s a reason we use the buddy system. Heck, you just proved why-”

“Scar, it’s fine. I’ll be fine. You go rest, okay?” Scar opened his mouth to protest but Grian didn’t let him. “I need some time to think, anyways. May as well try and get something out of it in the process.” Scar still wasn’t convinced. He gave Grian a hard stare and watched as the younger man sank in on himself under the scrutiny. He looked down and then back up at Scar, a pleading look in his eyes, and spoke with a quiet voice. “Please, Scar. I’ll be fine.”

Scar gave him the same look he had given Cub and Doc countless times last season when they were working too hard, but gave up when the effort made his headache pound and he brought a hand up to rub his temples. He sighed. “Alright, okay, I’ll go home. But you better come see me the second you get back, okay?”

Grian stood up a little straighter, seeming surprised that Scar had agreed. “Okay, Scar, I will.”

Scar turned around the way they came and found the bridge that they had made to get to the current island. He carefully made his way across it and many others as he trekked back to the portal home. He tried putting a pumpkin over his head as an extra safety measure but decided he would risk the angry endermen instead when squinting through the face of the halloween decoration made his headache worse. He kept his tired eyes on the ground for the most part anyways. Who knew that nearly dying in the void was just as tiring as actually dying in the void?

Before long his feet splashed in water and he risked looking up, smiling happily as he spotted the bedrock circle that would drop him right back into his comfy bed in Larry’s shell. He let himself fall into the portal, embracing the numbness that came with it until he was on top of the purple blanket that he so desperately wanted to curl up in. He had enough of a conscience left to shrug his armor off and even take his robe off, haphazardly throwing it somewhere on the floor. Not waiting a second longer, Scar snuggled up into the soft wool of his bed and drifted to sleep.

[frangelic999]

Resident Evil Time

As we all know, Spooky Season began on August 1st, as it does every year. Skeletons began to emerge from the earth, and we all joined together to help along the slightly unripe ones with just a knuckle bone sticking up out of the lawn. Pumpkins rolled down into town from the foothills, snuggling into piles of radiant leaves as they awaited their new, temporary keepers. Here on the west coast of America, ash began to fall from the sky, as it does every season of ash, and we all went out to frolic in the ash as we gasped for air in our newly toxic Zone. It never rains in California, except when it’s raining ash. As such, around August 1st I began my quest of playing every mainline Resident Evil game, and a couple of spin-offs. What follows is the book report that I wrote on this experience.

Resident Evil is a series that’s been on my radar in one way or another as far back as 1996, when I was a kid, but I never really took a very close look at it, or wanted to, until I played RE7 in 2019. My oldest memory involving this game is wandering Blockbuster with my older brother looking for a game to rent. Another kid was there, also with their older brother, and the little kid suggested Resident Evil, but the bigger kid sagely declared “Nah, the controls are bad,” and they left it at that. I don’t know why I remember this, but I do, and my general feeling about Resident Evil was negative, I think because I had played the demo and didn’t like it, due to the fact that it’s not really designed in such a way that a kid would like it much. My first actual experience with the series, outside of that, was playing Resident Evil 3 in 1999. At the time, I loved it, but I was 12, and wouldn’t have been able to articulate anything about why I liked it other than “cool videogame, Jill pretty. Jill me.” I also played RE4 and RE5 around the time they came out, and I enjoyed them as fun action games, but still didn’t think much of the series or really care about survival horror. My other experience with the genre pretty much only extends to Alan Wake, Dino Crisis, and Dead Space, all of which I played so long ago that I remember almost nothing about them. What kind of monsters does Alan Wake fight? Couldn’t say. Could be anything, really. I remember the main character of Dino Crisis, Regina. She had red hair. Regina pretty. Regina me? Strangely enough, wanting to play the role of formidable, independent, resourceful, attractive women in games was a running theme in my formative years. What could this possibly mean? We may never know. But anyway, I was very excited to go on this journey into the survival horror franchise, and one of the most iconic franchises of all time. It had its highs and lows, but it was well worth it, and I emerged with a newfound appreciation for the design and appeal of survival horror games. The intention here isn’t to give a full, thorough analysis of these games or a breakdown of every aspect of them, but to compile my various thoughts on them, so it’s more of an opinionated overview than a deep dive. 

Resident Evil (1996)

It’s actually really hard to place this game when making a tier list, due to the simple fact that none of these other games would exist without the conventions Resident Evil set. It was groundbreaking, and literally invented a genre. At the same time, it's impossible for me to not compare it to other, better games, because I have knowledge of the rest of the series. It was an experiment for Capcom, and it shows in the game's rough edges. It feels like it had good ideas that didn’t always live up to their full potential, due to some combination of inexperience, available hardware/software, and questionable implementation.

RE1 is... not very good at being scary. It does its best, but it's a fairly early PS1 game. I think a lot of this has to do with the atmosphere and graphics. Visually, it’s just kind of ugly in that early PS1 way, and the color choices are dull and lack cohesion. For a horror game taking place in a spooky dilapidated mansion, it feels a little too bright, and I’m guessing it has to do with the fact that no one really knew how to make darkness convincing on PS1 at the time. But it’s not entirely the PS1’s fault this game is ugly, as you can see from RE2 and RE3 being not ugly. The color choices and backgrounds just aren’t especially lush or interesting.

I don't really need to go into the voice acting and writing of this game, due to their status of legendary badness. The live action cutscenes are unbelievably cheesy and almost impossible to watch with a straight face. The live action ending where Jill and Chris hold hands as they fly away in a helicopter is incredibly dumb. If you correctly chose Jill as your main character, it just seems incongruous that after fighting her way out of a deathtrap of horrifying creatures, she's now laying her head on the big strong man's shoulder. It’s bad, but fortunately the game isn’t entirely bad narratively. It was surprising, in a game from 1996, to see the in-world documents scattered around that add to the narrative, telling you what's really going on and adding detail to the broader strokes of the story. This is a thing that's ubiquitous in games now, AAA or otherwise, and I'm wondering if this game helped to establish that facet of games. RE1 has a simple story of evil corporate experiments gone wrong, with the driving force behind everything the player/character does being escape from the mansion, and this simplicity really works in its favor. As we shall see in later RE games, convoluted stories don’t really lend themselves all that well to horror. 

If you look at other games released in 1996, there are a lot of fast paced action games, like 3D platformers and first person shooters, as well as RPGs, and it's clear this game was something different. It has that slow, methodical play that makes survival horror feel unique. The feeling of not knowing what's waiting for you behind the next door, but knowing you have to go anyway, and that balance between surviving and solving puzzles to progress. The backtracking and item hunts, the interlocking paths and puzzles, the environmental storytelling and documents, the sense of isolation, it's all here in the first game. Some players may not find inventory management thrilling, but it’s a key part of these games, and it’s mostly done well in the good ones. Inventory management and item scarcity are a big part of what actually captures that feeling of “survival horror.” Since items are needed to progress, your inventory is directly tied to your progress, and at its best this forces you to make tough decisions about what you really need to carry and by extension makes you play more conservatively and prioritize avoidance. At its worst, it forces you to go back to previous areas for no reason and wastes your time while hurting the pace of the game, which RE1 is only guilty of at one point toward the end. The more weapons and ammo you have, the less room you have to do the work of actually progressing in the game through item-based puzzles, so you often have to sacrifice some of your lethality to progress smoothly. There’s a fine line between giving the player too many resources and too few, and almost all good survival horror games walk that line very well. It's also just thematically appropriate that your character isn't able to lug around a hundred pounds of gear. The open-ended nature of exploration, or the illusion thereof, is also an important aspect of survival horror. In good Resident Evil games, you usually have multiple doors you can choose to open, multiple potential paths, and feeling out which one is right, and which places are safe to travel, is a big part of the game. That exploratory feeling of gradually extending your reach and knowledge of the place you're in, knowing how vulnerable you are but also knowing you have to keep going deeper, gives the player a much greater sense of agency than more linear horror experiences.

All of these good design elements are firmly established by RE1, but they're just not executed as well as in future Resident Evil and survival horror titles, and by today's standards, playing it can feel like a chore. I think it certainly deserves a huge amount of credit for establishing almost everything that's good and defining about survival horror. There were earlier horror themed games, and I'm sure there are online people who'd be strangely invested in arguing that it's not the first survival horror game, but Resident Evil was clearly something new, different, and more sophisticated. It feels like a beginning, a rough draft, but it established something special. In some ways, I feel like RE1 has actually aged better than a lot of its 1996 contemporaries. Not in terms of controls, visuals or voice acting, heavens no. But, in terms of things like a focus on atmosphere, good pacing, and elegant, focused design, much of it still holds up today.

-Monster Review Corner-

These are the monsters that started it all. Zombies, undead dogs, hunters, Tyrant, and the absolute classic, a big plant that hates you. And who can forget the most forgettable monsters, giant spiders? The enemies themselves aren't especially exciting, but honestly, they work very well for the style and slow pace of this game. The deadly mansion full of the living dead is a classic horror setting. Things like Hunters and Tyrant seem pedestrian by series standards now, but they would have been a surprise in a zombie game in 1996, and Hunters are terrifying when they first appear. Overall monster score: 7/10

Time to complete: 5:46

Games were shorter overall in 1996, but the short game length is another survival horror trait the game established, and that brevity is a trait I really appreciate about this series and the genre as a whole. 

Resident Evil 2 (1998)

I feel like I’m going to be using the word “better” a lot. RE2 is immediately more cinematic than its predecessor, which is a good thing. It’s an important element of establishing tension and atmosphere. All the best horror movies, in my opinion, have smart and artful cinematography behind them. I’m not going to say Resident Evil 2 has masterful cinematic direction, but it’s a vast improvement over the previous game. Gone are the super cheesy FMV cutscenes and the atrocious voice acting. The voice acting here isn't great by today's standards, but people do talk mostly like humans! This must be due to the fact that it was the first time Capcom ever outsourced voice acting to a studio outside of Japan. The writing is also much, much better. The soundtrack is much more atmospheric, and even the save room music is better. Visually, the game looks so much better. Character models are more detailed and lifelike, and backgrounds are much more detailed, colorful and cohesive. I vastly prefer the character designs to those of RE1. They’re very 90s, in a fun anime way. Even the portraits in the inventory screen look way better. Even the story and the documents you find are more well written and interesting, and Umbrella is established as a more sinister and far-reaching presence. 

RE2 gives you separate campaigns for Claire and Leon that are similar, but different in some major ways. Rather than being a super long game, it has a short campaign that can be replayed multiple times with different characters for improved ranks, unlockables, and short bonus levels. I actually really like this kind of replayability, as opposed to the much more common type of replayability of modern games, which is just making the game 100 hours long and filled with boring sidequests, trinkets and skill points. This is  partially because I inevitably burn out on that kind of game, even if I like it (Horizon Zero Dawn, Breath of the Wild) and never finish the game. Super Bunnyhop has a whole video (“Let’s Talk About Game Length”) about the advantages of this game’s style of replay value which is worth a watch. I’m much more likely to rank a game among my favorites if I’m actually compelled to finish it. I’m always annoyed by how persistently gamers thoughtlessly complain about these games (or any game for that matter) being too short. Gee, maybe that has something to do with why 4, 5, and 6 all feel so bloated and outstay their welcome. Funny how the three most recent games in the series that brought it back from the brink of total irrelevance are all under ten hours in length.

The level design feels less haphazard and boring than RE1, but retains the satisfying sense of interconnectedness that the original mansion had. The balance of the game is good, and it feels dangerous without ever feeling unfair, like all the best RE games. Distribution of healing items and ammo feels right - I rarely felt like I was in serious danger of running out, but I always felt the pressure to conserve ammo and remember where healing items were to pick up later. This game is also a sterling example of the kinds of boss fights that work in survival horror. Rather than being reflex tests, boss fights are more a test of how smartly and conservatively you’ve been playing. If you’ve saved enough powerful ammo by playing well, you’ll have no problem with boss monsters, and there’s also the alligator fight, which, if you were paying attention to the area you just traversed, can be ended with one bullet. 

Overall, it’s a huge improvement over RE1 in every way imaginable, and a genuinely good game even by today’s standards, if you discount the cheesy voice acting and dated cutscenes. I finished RE1 in two sittings because I wanted to get it over with, but I finished RE2 nearly as fast because it was hard to stop playing. This is where the series came into its own, and RE2 feels like the beginning of the series as we know it today, while RE1 feels more like an experimental rough draft.

-Monster Review Corner-

This game, overall, has some great monsters. Fantastic monsters, and this is where you’ll find ‘em. First, we’ve got your classic zombies. Classic. We’ve got your zombie dogs, two for one deal. We’ve got some evil birds who inexplicably burst through a window one time. Okay, decent. Giant spiders, boooring. But then, here comes a new challenger! It’s lickers, one of perhaps the most iconic Resident Evil monsters. These nasty wall crawlin’ flesh puppies have got exposed brains, big ol’ claws, razor sharp tongues and a complete lack of sight. Due to this last fact, you can avoid them by being very quiet, which is extremely survival horror. Lickers are great. RE2 also has a giant alligator, which even the RE2 remake team thought was too silly to include in the remake (but to the great relief of everyone around the world, he made it anyway). Personally, I love the fact that they brought the classic urban cryptid, the mutant sewer gator, into the RE family. RE2 also has a Tyrant who chases you around in the second scenario. He’s just Nemesis before Nemesis. There are also big plant monsters who look like walking venus fly traps, totally rad. And finally, all of the G-Mutation designs pretty much set the stage for the monster design of all future RE mutants, including Nemesis. They have this alien, body horror feel to them that’s become a hallmark of the series. Overall monster score: 10/10

Time to complete: 5:06

Resident Evil 3: Nemesis (1999)

RE3 has a darker tone than RE2, a lot of quality of life changes, and the terrifying presence of an unstoppable Nemesis. It’s a more combat oriented game, not in that combat is more complex, but in that there are more weapons, more ammo, faster zombies, and in comparison to the two previous games there are more times where it’s safer to kill enemies than avoid them. Jill can also dodge and quick turn. Dodging is fine, and quick turn, was an excellent addition that’s been in every RE since then, minus RE7. It’s a very good game, but the fact that there are fewer moments of quiet exploration and puzzling detracts from the variety of the game and makes it feel more one note. It definitely feels more like an action movie, not just in its increased amount of fighting but also in its story beats and cutscenes. I think it’s important to make a distinction between the style of this game and RE4/5/6, in that those are action games with light or nonexistent survival horror elements, while this is a survival horror game with action elements. I played the game on hard mode, because this game only has hard and easy mode. Hard is essentially normal, it's what you'd come to expect from the series, and easy mode is easy and gives you an assault rifle at the start. 

The titular Nemesis is such a great way to change up the Resident Evil formula. The first time you encounter him, he kills Brad in a cutscene, and you run into the police station. You think he’ll just appear at certain times during cutscenes and maybe a boss fight, but then a little while later he bursts through a window and chases you, and he’s faster than anything encountered previously in the series. That’s when it becomes clear that you’re going to be hunted, and from that point on Nemesis is in the back of your mind at all times, injecting an undercurrent of paranoia into every moment of methodical exploration. Although, I do have complaints about Nemesis, too. If you’re familiar with the series up to this point, his appearances are undermined by that very knowledge. What I mean is that if you played the first two games, you start to get a sense of when events or attacks are going to be triggered in Resident Evil, and that makes Nemesis much more predictable. You start to think “whelp, it’s about time for another Nemesis attack,” and then he shows up. Also, the first time you’re actually supposed to stand and fight him is an awful boss fight, and the first really bad boss fight in the series. The game’s dodge mechanic is finicky and hard to time, and it’s an important part of winning the fight, at least on hard mode. He’s basically a bullet sponge, which is not interesting. 

Something that I like about three is it really expands on the setting by giving you lots of details about Umbrella and their relation to Raccoon City. You learn that not only have they infiltrated the city government and police, but a lot of the city's infrastructure was funded by Umbrella donations. You also learn that they maintain their own paramilitary force and are a far reaching, international corporation. Umbrella is really fleshed out as a more robust and powerful organization here. 

Another unique aspect of this game, that’s never been in another RE game, is the “choose your own adventure” system. Nemesis will be after you, and you can choose between two different options, such as running into the sewers or hiding in the kitchen. You have a limited time to make these choices, and they have positive or negative outcomes, but never outright kill you, as far as I could tell. It’s kind of neat, and an interesting way to change things up occasionally, but not especially important. 

Overall, this is an excellent Resident Evil game, though a good deal less original and groundbreaking than RE2.

-Monster Review Corner-

Honestly, most of the monsters are fine, but nothing to write home about. Nemesis is the star of the show, which you can already tell by the fact that the game is named after him and he’s on the front cover. He’s like the cooler, better, more deadly version of a Tyrant. Nemesis score: 10/10

Time to complete: 5:32

An Aside About Puzzles

I’ve been trying to figure out how to articulate what I like about the puzzles in this series, and this seems as good a place to put these thoughts as any. I get that not everyone likes the puzzles in this series, and that many of them can only be called puzzles in a very loose sense, but I think they add a crucial ingredient to the games.

The thing is, if they were more complicated or difficult puzzles, they would take up too much screen time, they would overpower the rest of the game, like too much salt in a dish. There are a lot of them where you have to follow riddle-like clues to figure out what to do, but they're all pretty easy. There are a lot of item hunts that boil down to finding item A and bringing it to point B, or combining item A with item B and using the result at point C, and I remember plenty of jokes over the years playfully lampooning this facet of Resident Evil. But, while playing through these games, I found myself dissatisfied with the view that these item hunts and simple puzzles are stupid, or bad game design. Because really, what makes these games good is not shooting or puzzles or atmosphere or good monsters, but all of these elements working together in harmony. It seems like the more harmonious that balance, the better the Resident Evil game. All these little parts make up the whole. The puzzles aren't hard, sure, but they aren't meant to be. They add an element of sleuthing and a sense of accomplishment and progression that would otherwise be lacking, and which could easily slip into frustration if they were any more difficult, and detract from the overall experience. If you just went around and shot at monsters and opened doors, it would be missing something big, and it would be a much poorer series. If you need evidence of that, may I direct you to Resident Evils 4 to 6. Without that exploratory feeling, without that aha feeling of figuring it out, it would feel bland. "If I use this item to open this, then I get this thing and I combine it with this, it frees up space in my inventory, and now I can take them back to the spot I remember from earlier because I was paying attention and taking mental notes, and I can open this path..." I'd argue that this feeling of things clicking together neatly, of attentive and methodical play paying off, is integral to the series and to the entire genre it spawned. The whole game is a puzzle that you’re figuring out, and things like item juggling, map knowledge, and carefully leaving enough space in your inventory are a part of that puzzle. 

The puzzles in the series are more representational than what might usually be called a puzzle. The item lugging, inventory swapping parts that I remember being maligned at one time are more akin to piecing together a jigsaw puzzle, but those pieces are scattered across a monster infested, carefully designed, difficult to traverse map. What made RE7 feel so much like a revival of Resident Evil, despite it being a first person game that looks and feels very little like its predecessors, was returning to this approach to game design. It was a polished and well made return to the principles that made survival horror popular. The fact that Capcom brought back all those often complained about puzzles and item hunts, and slashed the current idea of game length to ribbons, returning to the roots of the series, and then those games being so highly praised, feels so right in part because it feels like the developers are saying "look, a lot of you were totally wrong about what made these games good."

Resident Evil - Code: Veronica (2000)

To me the most immediately noticeable thing about this game is Claire’s embarrassingly early-2000s outfit: high rise boot cut jeans, cowgirl boots, a short-sleeved crop top jacket, all topped off with a pink choker and fingerless gloves. I don’t think I’ve ever seen character design that so perfectly encapsulates the time period of a game’s release. It’s bad, and the game only gets worse from there. 

I really tried to like Code Veronica, at first. But after playing RE1-3, saying it's underwhelming is putting it lightly. I honestly don't think I have a single good thing to say about this game, and it's possibly the worst mainline Resident Evil game ever made (RE6 being the only thing that might take that crown of trash in its stead). It's pretty much not possible to take Code Veronica seriously in any way, especially not as a horror game. The visuals have no sense of darkness or atmosphere and manage to look much worse than the old pre-rendered graphics, the puzzles are uninspired rehash, the enemies and bosses are irritating, the character designs are a particular type of early-2000s bad, the voice acting is insufferable, the story is asinine, and the game is full of the bad kind of backtracking. It's not entirely the game's fault it's ugly, it's a product of its time, but it's weird to see in retrospect because it looks worse than RE3 from one year prior. Previous RE games had bad voice acting, but this is the first one where the voice acting makes you want to turn the game off. 

Up until this point, the storylines of Resident Evil games were very simple. Evil corporation caused chaos with a virus, get out alive. There are details scattered throughout about how the city and government were being paid off, but that’s the gist of it. Code Veronica is where the lore of RE starts to get convoluted and sometimes very dumb. I won’t go into all the ways the story is bad, but suffice it to say this is definitely when Resident Evil jumped the shark, and it paves the way for the stupidity of RE4. It also uses the “mentally ill people are scary” horror trope, which is perhaps my least favorite horror trope. The villain for most of the game, Alfred, has *gasp* a split personality and thinks he’s also his sister. Of course, at one point Claire calls him a “crossdressing freak.” I’ll just leave it at that. Of course nobody who writes this kind of thing bothers to do any kind of research into the mental illnesses they use as story crutches. I feel like I need to mention the voice acting, for Steve and Alfred particularly. Steve sounds like he walked off of a middle school campus, and Alfred sounds like your local community theater’s production of Sweeney Todd. They’re both absolutely atrocious and make the game that much more annoying to play. Claire’s acting is about what you’d expect from a Saturday morning cartoon of the era.

As though the fact that it's a bad game visually and narratively wasn't enough, it's also badly designed, not much fun to play, and way longer than the previous three. The game’s map, at least for Claire’s portion (most of the game), is divided into multiple small areas, each with one path leading to them, so you have to go over these paths repeatedly once you’ve retrieved an item from a completely different area, and it makes for a lot of very tiresome backtracking. The series always had backtracking, of course, but never over such long, samey stretches of space. On top of this, there are tons of blatantly bad design choices. To name a few:

-The hallway you have to traverse multiple times containing moths which poison you and respawn every time you leave and are really hard to hit on top of being a waste of ammo. It’s hard to see how they were unaware that this is bad since they also leave an infinite supply of poison antidotes in the same room

-The fact that there’s no indication whatsoever that you should leave items behind for the next character you have to play, which left me struggling to even be able to kill enemies as Chris

-Multiple times where in order to trigger progress you have to look at or pick up a certain thing, not for any logical in-game reason but just because it triggers a cutscene. One of these makes you look at the same thing twice, and I wandered around not knowing what to do for a while before checking a walkthrough

-More than one save room that contains no item box, when this game asks you to constantly juggle items and repeatedly travel long distances with specific items

There’s more, but I don’t want to write or think about this bad game anymore. This game is a slag heap that deserves to be forgotten, and I hope it’s never remade. Something I find really disappointing about Code Veronica is that the setting is ripe for a good Resident Evil game, but they botch it. It takes place in two locations, a secret island prison run by Umbrella, and an antarctic research station, both of which I can imagine a great RE game taking place in. I guess, really, the best thing that can be said about Code Veronica is that it’s a survival horror game. They didn’t totally stray from the principles that made the series good, they just implemented those things very badly, in a very stupid game.

Time to complete: who knows, I quit near the final stretch of the game. The internet says it takes about 12:30, which is far too long.

REmake (2002)

I played the remake first, and it’s the only game I played out of order, because when I started I had no plans to play the entire series. It’s a remake that fixes everything wrong or dated about the original while keeping the things that made it good, and I would say it’s the definitive version of the game and the one that should be played. 

Visually, a lot of it looks very good, and uses darkness much better than the original. I like this game’s high def pre-rendered backgrounds, because it’s like looking into an alternate reality where pre-rendered graphics never went away, and just increased in fidelity. I actually really like a lot of the backgrounds in this game. Pre-rendered backgrounds have their shortcomings, but I think they can play a role in horror games. They give the developers total control of how things are framed, and framing/direction are a big part of what can make things ominous or scary in horror movies. You can do this to some extent in games with free cameras, but without nearly as much control. I think over time the popular consensus became that pre-rendered backgrounds are inherently bad, but I think like any style of graphics they have their pros and cons. The late 90s Final Fantasies are great examples of how pre-rendered graphics can be used to frame characters and events in certain ways.

The strongest suit of this game is that it really feels like a horror game, and avoidance is encouraged over combat due to scarce ammo and healing. The pace is slow and thoughtful, the mansion is sprawling and claustrophobic, and even one or two zombies feels like a threat, especially before you find the shotgun. Even after that, shotgun shells are fairly scarce. Like the original, combat mechanics are intentionally very simple and limited, though this one sees the introduction of the defensive items that return in the RE2 and 3 remakes. One thing I really like is that if you kill a zombie and leave their body, without decapitating or burning it, it will eventually mutate into a fast and powerful zombie, and these are genuinely threatening to encounter. You constantly have to make decisions in this game about what’s more important, immediate safety or conserving ammo. The fuel that’s used to burn corpses is limited, and can be used strategically to eliminate threats from frequently traveled areas. It’s a great idea for a game mechanic, but in practice, I rarely did this, because inventory is so limited that it didn’t feel worthwhile to use two of my eight slots on a lighter and fuel. Another nice added horror element is the fact that doors aren’t always safe. You’ll hear monsters pounding on doors, see them shaking, and at multiple points they’ll be smashed open when you thought you were safe.

A lot of the ideas that made this game good and the original good are ideas that were returned to in RE7, the RE3 remake, and especially the RE2 remake, and a big part of what made those games so successful. 

Time to complete: 10:15

In my opinion it ran a little too long. It takes almost twice as long as the original, and I feel like the added areas pad out that length rather than improving the game. Even though I think it’s a very good game, it started feeling like a slog in the last few hours.

Resident Evil Zero (2002)

After Code Veronica, it was initially refreshing to feel like I was actually playing Resident Evil again and not some subpar knockoff. This one feels a lot more like classic RE, and in its slower pace it’s most similar to REmake or the original trilogy. I played the HD remaster of RE0(which changes nothing but the graphics) since it's the one I own on steam, so I can't speak to the original GameCube graphics, but the art direction itself is vastly better, and it creates an atmosphere that's perfectly Resident Evil. Highly detailed backgrounds, with rich dark colors, old paintings, dusty bookshelves, soft clean lighting, marble and dark wood, wind-rustled ivy, shadows and rain, creep dilapidated industrial spaces. The HD remaster is gorgeous, and one of the best looking games in the series.

This game adds two major new mechanics: playing as a team of two and swapping between characters, and the ability to drop items anywhere. Character swapping is an interesting gimmick, made more of a curiosity by the fact that it will probably never be used again in a RE game. Often it's pretty neat, but just as often, it's an annoying chore. I like the idea of controlling two characters, but I don't think what they attempted to do with it was entirely successful, and could have been better with a couple of simple changes. Ultimately all the inventory management required feels like more trouble than it's worth, especially since you have to carry weapons and ammo for both characters. Between inventory management and swapping off-character actions, I found myself in the inventory screen a lot more than in previous games. It seems like they could have alleviated these problems with more inventory space and buttons for switching off-character actions. Most of the time it ends up feeling like a chore to manage two characters and two separate inventories. In theory, the ability to drop items anywhere adds an element of player choice and planning, but in practice, I just found myself missing the item box that allows you to access the same items from different places.

This game is fine for the first hour or two, but ends up getting more and more frustrating the farther you get into it. After playing about half the game, I started feeling like I'd be having a less terrible time on easy mode. I died in it a lot more times than in any previous game. The combination of really irritating new enemy types and all weapons (even the grenade launcher) feeling underpowered means there are multiple enemy encounters where you're just forced to lose health. This wouldn't be so bad if there were enough healing items around, but there aren't. Every enemy in the game, even a basic zombie, feels too bullet sponge-y. I repeatedly found myself with very little ammo and no healing items, so in a lot of situations I would just die, and reloading with the foreknowledge of what rooms would contain felt like the only way to progress. Managing the health of two characters, one who has very low health, makes it that much harder. I played through all of the previous games on normal difficulty (RE3 on hard) so I know I'm not imagining the spike in difficulty. It's possible they wanted to make this game challenging for series veterans, but if that's the case they missed the mark, because part of what makes a good RE game is excellent balance of difficulty. In a good RE, you always feel like you're facing adversity but still progressing, and you really don't die all that often if you're being careful and using the right weapons for situations. In RE0, you just die a lot to frustrating video game garbage and feel irritated that you have to reload and repeat content. To make matters even worse, aiming feels weirdly sticky in this game and movement feels clunkier than previous games for some reason.

Just like Code Veronica, this game has a premise that seems like it should excel as a Resident Evil game, but it misses the mark. With the new mechanics, it feels like they were struggling to think of ways to further refine and reinvent a series that was getting a little tired. I love the formula of the first three games, but I can understand why after six games following that same formula, with a lot of very similar in-game occurrences and puzzles, they wanted to move in a different direction with RE4. This game feels like it's floundering, attempting to reinvent the series while being chained to the same rules, and though I have mixed or negative feelings about the next three games, it feels like the series was in dire need of a total overhaul.

-Monster Review Corner-

Whoever designed the monsters in this game thought that giant animals are absolutely horrifying. Giant bat, giant scorpion, giant centipede, giant roaches. There are also guys made of leeches, and they're pretty boring and annoying to fight, and it's hard not to find the way they move comedic. There are also hunters and your typical zombies. All in all, a lackluster offering of critters. Overall monster score: 3/10

Resident Evil 4 (2005)

Let's get the obvious out of the way: this game feels almost nothing like Resident Evil, and feels less and less like it the further into it you get. The devs made sure to do a lot of things that make RE4’s identity as an action game very obvious. It’s a game of series firsts: first in the series with an over the shoulder camera, first with weapon stats, first with such an abundance of enemies and weapons, first with QTEs, first where the primary enemies aren’t shambling zombies, first with currency and a merchant, the first where Umbrella isn’t the big bad, the first where you can karate kick and suplex enemies. It’s incredibly not survival horror. It might succeed as a 2005 action game, but it fails miserably at being Resident Evil.

I’m feeling generous, so I’ll start with the things I like about RE4. I really do appreciate that it’s a slower and more methodical action game than its contemporaries, and precise, thoughtful shooting is rewarded. I also like that the over the shoulder camera gives you a pretty narrow field of view, which makes it always feel like enemies could be lurking just off screen. This makes things more tense and is often used to surprise the player, especially in the early game. The almost identical perspective used in the exceptional RE2 and RE3 remakes shows that they weren’t off the mark with this element of the game’s design. However, in RE4 even this good thing is undercut by the fact that jarring, anxious combat music plays whenever enemies are anywhere nearby. The first 2-4 hours of this game, just about up to the Mendez boss, are actually a pretty good game, and provide most of the really tense and scary moments. Unfortunately, these opening hours aren’t really indicative of all the stupid shit to come. Something I grew to hate about this game is that it feels like it just goes on and on and on. It took me around 12 hours, which is short by video game standards, but long by RE standards. By the time I reached the end, it had long outstayed its welcome. Even in these early, decent moments, there was still stuff I hated, like the button mashing quick time events to run from Indiana Jones boulders, the garishly glowing item drops, the dumb kicks, the dynamite zombies.

The crux of a survival horror experience is the feeling of vulnerability, and this feeling is only scarcely captured in the opening few hours of RE4, when it’s still sort of pretending to be Resident Evil. But then, you keep getting more and more powerful, as you do in action games, you keep getting more and more weapons and upgrades and grenades and facing more and more enemies and bosses until it all feels trivial. It’s thoroughly an action game, and by the time you’re near the end, storming a military fort guarded by heavily armed commando zombies manning gatling turrets while you’re aided by helicopter support, it’s clear the game has entirely stopped masquerading as Resident Evil. On top of being a big stupid action game, it’s also extremely a video game. The glowing items that are dropped whenever enemies die, the tiny adorable treasure chests full of doubloons, the big garish video game markers for QTEs(and the most heinous kinds of QTEs: button mashing QTEs and mid-cutscene QTEs), the action movie window jumps and kicks, the cultists driving a death drill, Leon’s backflips, the dumb one-liners that scarcely make sense at times, a giant fish boss, a mine cart level. The absurd stupidity of this game never lets up, so much so that playing it in 2020, it feels almost like an intentional parody, which I know it’s not. 

The story is kind of silly from the start, and delves increasingly into the realm of asinine bullshit as it goes on, as though Capcom and Shinji Mikami sought out the dumbest ideas they could find. In RE2, Leon was a cop for one day during a zombie apocalypse, and now somehow he's working for the White House on a solo mission finding the president's daughter. It's quite the barely explained leap. One of my least favorite things in the narrative department is that Leon's voice acting and dialogue make him insufferable. The humble rookie from RE2 is gone, replaced by a heavily masculinized, aggressive, arrogant, misogynistic, backflipping action movie hero. We went from six consecutive games with women either as one of two playable main characters or the only playable character, with Jill Valentine in RE3 single-handedly destroying the most powerful BOW ever created, to a game where a gruff manly man is tasked with rescuing a literal damsel in distress, and has actual lines like “Feh, women” and “Sorry, but following a lady’s lead just isn’t my style.” It’s atrociously bad, and I hate the character they decided he should be for this game. It also doesn’t even make sense, because why would he even have that attitude towards women after seeing what Claire can do in RE2? It’s a huge step backwards for the series. On top of this awfulness, the actual plot points are just increasingly unbelievable and imbecilic, in a way that totally undercuts any way in which the game could theoretically be frightening. At the end of the game, it’s not Leon and Ashley sitting in silence as they contemplate their harrowing and traumatic experience, it’s “Mission accomplished, right Leon?! Please have sex with me!” and then they literally ride off into the sunset on a jet ski.

At first I thought they were aiming to turn a beloved survival horror series into a big dumb action movie, which is partly true, but then I realized what they had really made: an amusement park. It’s divided into themed zones, like an amusement park: there’s a spooky village, a deathtrap castle, a haunted manor, slimy sewers, an underground tomb, a Mad Max island. There are little coaster cars with purple velvet seats that carry you through the castle, there’s a mine cart ride, living suits of armor, there’s literally a giant animatronic statue of Salazar you can climb around on, there are trinkets and treasures everywhere and a merchant always magically appearing to sell you new toys to make sure you don’t ever get bored or think too hard, there’s a lava-filled carousel room with fire-breathing dragon statues, a haunted house section, a shooting gallery, a cave full of monster bugs, a hedge maze, a tower of terror where flaming barrels are rolled down the stairs(and then you get to pull the lever to roll them!), there’s a crane game, an evil villain lair with a deadly laser corridor, there is for some reason a subterranean battle maze in a cage suspended over a chasm, and your whole visit to this horror themed wonder park culminates in a jet ski ride through a collapsing cavern.

I find it baffling, but "a masterpiece", "the best Resident Evil game", and “one of the best video games ever made” are actual ways I have seen this game described. Multiple reviewers called it the best of the series, and people continue to call it that. Gone is the tense, atmospheric, resource management based survival horror gameplay, the harmonious balance of puzzles, survival and action that made this series so beloved. It’s replaced with a theme park of homogenous action gameplay and an incredibly stupid story. In my mind, it’s not Resident Evil at all, and may as well have belonged to an entirely new series that’s continued in RE5 and RE6. Another oft repeated bit of unquestioned conventional wisdom about RE4 is that it “saved the series from itself,” which is strange given that it marked the beginning of a slump that lasted over a decade. But, who knows? Maybe Resident Evil had to undergo this kind of transformation and decline to ultimately produce the four most recent Resident Evil games, all among the best of the survival horror genre. If these bad mid series games had to come first in order for the latest four exceptional games to come later, then I’ll gladly suffer their existence.

-Monster Review Corner-

Another thing I actually like about this game is a lot of the creature design work. The Mendez boss fight feels like a Resident Evil fight, and his insect-like true form looks like a classic Resident Evil BOW. Verdugo and U-3, likewise, feel like classically inhuman RE creatures, and they’d be right at home in a survival horror series entry. Regenerators and Iron Maidens are genuinely terrifying creatures – or they would be in a survival horror game. Here, they’re just another enemy to mop up. The Plagas that burst out of enemies are a shock when they first appear, and look like horrifying hybrids of The Thing and facehuggers. The chainsaw men are initially one of the best and most horror-centric additions to the game, that is, until you get powerful enough to trivialize them and they stop appearing. At least in the first two hours, they’re legitimately scary due to your narrow field of view and the fact that they one shot you. But it seems like with each thing this game may have done right, there comes something that it did very wrong. Toward the end of the game, you start fighting stuff like the zombies with huge gatling guns, and it’s very dumb. I hate these military zombies, I really do.

Overall monster score: 6/10

Overall monster score minus the merc zombies and dumb robed cultists: 9/10

Time to complete: 11:28

By around the 8 or 9 hour mark, I was practically begging for this game to end.

Resident Evil 5 (2009)

When I started this, I thought I'd like RE4 more than RE5, but it turns out 5 is a much better game. It's a big dumb action movie, but it's a much better big dumb action movie than RE4, or RE6. The action is better, the graphics and art direction are better, the controls are better, the story, characters and dialogue are all better. It's too bad they just couldn't let go of the QTEs. It's a very good Capcom action game, but again, not a great Resident Evil game. It's much more confident as an action game than RE4, and almost entirely stops pretending its gameplay is about anything other than action, to its benefit. The combat is faster and more responsive, but still feels slower and more methodical than most action games. It’s just overall a significantly improved action game.

RE5 Chris is so much better than RE4 Leon. Chris and Sheva are a likable duo who feel like a typical RE pair and play off of each other well. The dialogue likewise has much more natural localization than most if not all previous games in the series. I don't really like how they gave Jill and Wesker Kojima character designs, and this bad aesthetic continues in RE Rev.

The files unlocked in the menu are actually kinda good, and this game expands and fills out the setting in some interesting ways, setting the stage for the Revelations games and RE6.

If you read the files, you learn what happened to Umbrella and how they shut down. What's nice is that the files and in-game story actually go into the ramifications of a world where BOWs exist and can be sold to people with various agendas. It's a world of corporations, NGOs, political subterfuge, and black market dealers making profit off of human suffering, where a whole international organization was created to handle bioweapon incidents. It's disappointing that with this backdrop, the game's actual story is ultimately reduced to a battle in a volcano to save the world from a supervillain. It's a very comic book conclusion.

I know they're infected with a monster virus, but the visual of black people as writhing, animalistic subhumans is, uh... problematic, to say the least. Also, the image of Africa The Continent as a land of dead goats, megaphone-shouting lunatics and rabid, violent crowds. Also the scene early on where some brown savages are carrying off a scantily clad white woman. At least she turns into a tentacle monster shortly after instead of being rescued. It's hard to deny that they probably chose part of Africa as RE5's setting due to the misconception of the entire continent being a war-torn land of petty dictators.

Some parts of the game are much better than others. Generally, the early game is good. The ancient city level is... pretty bad. And it culminates in a laser mirror puzzle that some version of would feel at home in an older RE, but here feels out of place and rhythm-disrupting. I wouldn't necessarily say the game gets really bad toward the end, except for the two consecutive Wesker boss fights. The boss fights against Wesker are both bad and pretty dull. You don't really want your climactic final battle against a longtime series villain to be so boring. I imagine it's a bit less long and dull with another player, like everything in the game. I've played this game in co-op and alone, and you're really missing something by not playing co-op. Sheva's AI can be very frustrating and many parts are clearly designed for two human brains. Overall, RE5 ends pretty fast, and wears out its welcome less than RE4. The biggest problem with RE4, 5 and 6 is that they totally lose the spirit of survival horror. Because of that, I don’t have much to say about the gameplay of RE5 other than it’s a pretty decent action game. If you’ve played an action game, you’ve seen this kind of game design before, and it’s just not all that interesting. 

Neither of the D LCs missions are especially good or interesting, but I want to mention them because they do show the beginnings of Capcom experimenting with the episodic formula that they'd continue with Revelations, Revelations 2 and RE6.

Lost in Nightmares sees Jill and Chris exploring Ozwell Spencer's sprawling mansion, and is meant to be a throwback to the old style of RE. Unfortunately it doesn't have the spark that made those old games good, probably because it was designed by the RE5 team. It mostly ends up just being an extended and unnecessary reference to the classic games.

Desperate Escape is essentially just another level of RE5, but you play as Jill. Since RE5 already exists and is a fine length, this doesn't really need to exist.

Time to complete: 9:17

Resident Evil: Revelations (2012)

It's very rough around the edges, far from the production value you'd expect from the series, and definitely not something I'd call exceptional, but there are some good things going on. It definitely does feel more like RE than 4 or 5, but still only kinda feels like survival horror. It would be no great loss if this game didn't exist, but it's an interesting experiment.

This game was originally made for 3DS, and it feels very inconsistent, in a way you'd kind of expect a spinoff game made for a handheld console to be. It’s split up into episodes that usually take around half an hour, and have you switching between characters, and the short length was meant to be tailored to a handheld experience. Usually each chapter starts with a sort of interlude related to the main story where you play as other characters in another location, then it switches back to Jill exploring the main ship the game takes place on. The bite sized nature of the episodes makes it feel easy to keep playing. Some parts of the game are very fun and flow well, and other parts are just dull or frustrating. The game feels like a confused mix of survival horror and RE5 style action, and between that and the constant character swapping and hit-or-miss dialogue, it feels like a game that’s not very sure of what it wants to be. The bulk of the game where you’re playing as Jill aboard the Queen Zenobia, a BOW infested ship adrift at sea, tends to be the strongest part of the game, and it’s a great setting that’s perhaps underwhelming due to the graphical capabilities of the 3DS. You end up in a similar setting near the end of RE7, also directed by Koushi Nakanishi, and it looks a lot better there, and does justice to the concept better. Like so many things in Revelations, it was a good idea, but a bit underwhelming in its execution. This period of Resident Evil was definitely a time of trying out new directions for the series. Revelations, RE6, and another spin off I didn’t play called Operation Raccoon City were all released in 2012. RE6 is bad, Revelations is okay, and by all accounts Operation Raccoon City is not all that good. After a year like this, it makes sense Capcom went back to the drawing board. 

The writing in Revelations is not great, and is sometimes suddenly better or worse, but I appreciate what they were going for with the rapport between characters. I also feel like this game messes up that classic survival horror feel of exploring an intimidating place alone. You're always with a partner and always switching perspectives, so it never feels like you're alone, and because of that switching you never even really feel like you're isolated from the outside world on the Zenobia. It feels more like a TV show storytelling technique than something that works well for survival horror. Part of what makes survival horror work is that atmosphere created by feeling isolated and vulnerable, and it doesn't really work when the game is always cutting away between chapters to show what so-and-so is doing elsewhere.

Most of the characters get Kojima style designs, which I'm really not a fan of. Previous RE character designs were always very grounded without being too boring, and included classics like Jill's beret look, Jill's blue tube top look, Claire's magenta shorts look, and Ada's red dress look. I’m really not a fan of the skintight suit covered in tubes, straps and gadgets style of character design. It feels very “anime Rob Liefield.” 

I appreciate what they wanted to do by telling a story in multiple perspectives, and how they did it to suit a handheld game, but at the same time I feel like it disrupts the flow of exploration and the atmosphere of survival horror. Revelations 2 does a significantly better job of telling a story in different perspectives. Revelations was pretty fun to play, and had some decent ideas, but it’s nothing I’ll ever return to. It would be remiss of me not to mention my favorite bad dialogue of the game, so here are all of the best lines:

"Sorry, I don't date cannibal monsters."

"Me and my sweet ass are on the way!"

“Jill, where are you?”

"I dunno. A room, I think."

"These terrorists must be brought to justice... blast it!" 

-Monster Review Corner-

They went for an “under the sea” aesthetic for the monsters in this game, so almost every monster is a variation of a bloated pale humanoid. It does have guys that are like walking mutant sharks with arms that are swords and shields, which I’m not going to pretend isn’t sick, but they really, really don’t fit in a Resident Evil game. Oops, wrong game, these guys were supposed to go to Etrian Odyssey. The only kinda cool RE monster is the one that’s like a nightmare mermaid with spiny abdomen teeth. Overall monster score: 4/10

Time to complete: 5:12

Random fact: this was the first RE game where you could move while shooting.

Resident Evil 6 (2012)

I’m not going to have much to say about this one. RE6 is bad in many of the same ways the Tomb Raider reboot trilogy is. Abandoning almost everything that gives the series its unique identity in favor of trying to make a game that will sell a lot of copies. Obsessed with QTEs and explosive, loud set pieces, and resentful of player agency. "No no, silly player, look over here. Move at this speed. Go this way. We know best. Now that's entertainment!" It's a game that desperately wants to entertain and impress, dragging you by the wrist through loud, brash, guns-blazing action campaigns that totally miss the point of both horror and Resident Evil. Most of the time it just feels like an arcade shooter, and you're expected to stick to the script so closely that it may as well be a rail shooter. It really does take away everything that makes survival horror special: it doesn’t have a slow pace, it’s not about exploration, you don’t feel vulnerable or isolated, there’s no sense of map knowledge or pathfinding, it has overwrought combat mechanics, there’s pretty much no quiet time, the atmosphere is more goofy than scary, and it takes forever to finish. Sometimes it feels like this game really wanted to be Left 4 Dead 2: the way campaigns are set up like movies, the special zombie types, the co-op play, the sprawling levels. Except the devs seemed to have no clue as to what actually makes Left 4 Dead fun. The producer said the idea behind RE6 was to create the “ultimate horror entertainment,” which perfectly explains why it feels so much like a bad movie you’re being forced to sit through. It’s bombastic and stupid like a Fast and Furious movie, but doesn’t even have the idiot charm of one of those movies. Resident Evil 6 is a long, forgettable and stupid third-person action game that doesn't even have the common decency to be fun. 

Time to complete: Who knows. I'd finish this game if someone was paying me to, but they're not. People say it takes over 20 hours, which sounds unbearable. 

Resident Evil: Revelations 2

Finally some good fucking Resident Evil. I was actually kind of surprised by how good this game was, something the mediocre Revelations didn't prepare me for. It's a very welcome return to a more survival horror style of gameplay. From the start, it's dark, lonely and atmospheric. You do always have a companion, but it's still mostly very good at capturing that survival horror isolation feeling. 

It does have a few holdovers from RE6, most notably sprinting, skills and dodging, but it's the same style of dodge as RE3R, which doesn't feel totally out of place in a survival horror game, rather than the over the top rolls and dives of RE6. It doesn't have any of the dumb combat moves or the pointless stamina gauge or the action movie bombast. Skills are mostly passive and have only a very slight effect on gameplay. To me, this is a good thing, but it also means there may as well be no skills at all. It feels like something that’s needlessly tacked on, as though they wanted to convince a certain subset of their potential audience that it’s not just a classic survival horror experience, or perhaps they were trying to make it feel more modern, or extend replay value, or all of the above. In any case, it doesn’t need to be there and I’m glad it has little effect. 

The game has a good deal of combat, but combat is simple enough to fit into a survival horror game. It would have been fine with less, but it's still fine, because it actually has things outside of combat, unlike 4-6, and lets you play, explore, and figure things out without a lot of overbearing guidance. A lot of the puzzles and navigation feel like classic RE, and it’s a great return to form in that regard. Sometimes it has a bit too much combat for my taste, but this is made up for by long stretches with few or no enemies, and it has those survival horror moments of exploration and puzzle solving to balance things out. 

This game does AI companions right, for the first time in the series. Moira and Natalia are both really useful, and I found myself wanting to switch to them almost as often as I wanted to play Claire and Barry. You also don't really need to babysit them because it's pretty hard for them to die and they’re good at following behind. There are multiple good segments of the game where your characters separate, and Claire or Barry need to cover their partner while they traverse a room to gain access to the next area. Unlike in RE5, though, you’re not required to have a second player to have fun during these parts, and I don’t think it’s even possible to play the game co-op. At first glance this seems like a missed opportunity, but honestly, if someone had to play either of the secondary characters full time, it would get boring very quickly. I think it was a necessary sacrifice to make the two character system work well in a single player experience. I really don’t mind, since I think of survival horror as a single player genre. As a result, it lacks both the painfully slow character switching of RE0 and the painfully stupid AI of RE5. 

It’s funny that just as in RE5, Rev 2 ends in two consecutive Wesker boss fights, but this time against Alex Wesker rather than Albert. Also, these Wesker boss fights are much better. The final boss makes use of the character swapping, and actually does it really well. Barry is running from mutant Alex through cliffside caves, and you switch between him and Claire, who’s in a helicopter with a sniper rifle. It’s very much a Resident Evil fight, in that it’s more about positioning and survival than it is about fast shooting or burning the boss down with damage. 

I also actually think this game has a good story for the series, but mostly what makes it stand out is the characters themselves. I also really appreciate the callbacks to previous games. It refers back to things from RE1, Code Veronica, Revelations, and RE5. Alex Wesker, who I think previously only existed in lore notes, is the villain, and the Uroboros virus of RE5 plays a small role. It makes nods to the larger mythos without being so convoluted that someone who doesn’t know everything about every game would have trouble following. The central story is easy to follow: you’re trapped on an unknown mastermind’s monster infested deathtrap island, infected with a virus that causes you to turn into a disgusting, mindless monster if your level of fear gets too high. I love their choices of Claire and Barry as the main characters. Claire being a beloved series staple, and Barry being an unexpected but surprisingly great choice. I also love how you play in two different timelines, Claire and Moira on the island six months before, and Barry and Natalia searching for them in the present. You travel through a lot of the same areas, but fight different enemies, take different paths and solve different puzzles. Rev 2 also has the most naturalistic character dialogue and acting the series has seen thus far. It feels like the rapport they were going for in Rev 1, but done better, and both pairs of player characters play off of each other well. I like that Claire takes a matter-of-fact, seen it all before approach to the situation, because she’s been through two different self-contained zombie apocalypses, while Moira the teenager is always cursing and yelling and basically saying “what the fuck,” and she really acts like I think a teenager might in such a situation. Barry, the dumpy old dude with dad jokes who came prepared with his dorky backpack and cargo pants, and the fearless 10-year-old girl Natalia, also go together well. By the end, I found myself actually caring about what happened to these characters.

Between Rev 2's gameplay, dialogue, and visual style, it's easy to see how it paved the way for the third-person RE2 and RE3 remakes. It was a very good move for the series, and I'm surprised it's not mentioned more often. Despite being a sequel to a spin-off, it was at the time better at being Resident Evil than anything since REmake, which came out thirteen years prior. It has its highs and lows, but it’s a big step in the right direction, and a good survival horror game. It’s not quite the same quality of RE7, RE2R or RE3R, but I really liked Revelations 2. 

-Monster Review Corner-

Honestly, the monster designs are one of the weakest parts of Rev 2. The principal zombie-likes are just these kind of blobby, gross dudes who run at you, sometimes while holding wrenches or other makeshift weapons. Most of the enemies follow the same pattern, kinda blobby humanoids that look like bloated corpses or conglomerations of body parts, and I find it pretty dull. There are also some generic RE dogs that for some reason have pig heads. I never hold zombie dogs against a Resident Evil game, because you can’t have a Resident Evil without evil dogs. I don’t make the rules. As you progress you just get bigger, meaner blobby corpse guys with different abilities. There are only really two exceptions that I find less boring than the rest: Glasps, and Alex Wesker’s monstrous forms. Glasps are invisible, bloated flying insectoids that instantly kill you if they catch you. In order to kill them, you need to switch to Natalia, who can sense them and point them out, then switch back to Barry to take your shot. They cause this weird vision effect when they’re near, implying that their invisibility is something they’re doing to your mind, which to me feels less out of place than physical invisibility. If you had asked me before if I thought an invisible enemy was suited to RE, I would’ve said no, but Glasps feel like a creature out of a STALKER game, and I like it. Alex's final form is classic RE, like the Tyrant or G-Mutation designs, but with more of a disfigured crone vibe. Her unnaturally long spiky spine and humanoid limbs give her a creepy marionette feel. The heavily mutated humanoids, like Nemesis, tend to be among the best RE monster designs. Before she injects herself with Uroboros and transforms, she looks like an ancient haglike being with the air of a hunched vulture, with tubes and staples and half her face peeled off, a victim of her own T-Phobos virus.

Time to complete: 7:45

A practically perfect length. It feels like a long and satisfying experience that's paced well and wastes very little of your time. 

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard (2017)

I actually played this game in early 2019, before I ever conceived of this journey through the series, and I was as surprised as anyone at Resident Evil 7 being a good game. An oft repeated sentiment among RE fans who dislike RE7 is "it's not Resident Evil." In my mind, that's a very strange thing to say, since it borrows almost all of its design principles from the classic trilogy. I think the negativity some people feel towards this game is a knee-jerk reaction to the first person perspective. I've learned that like any fandom, Resident Evil's is full of idiots who just kind of say things, and barely make any attempt to understand the thing they like so much. (Not to say everyone who's an RE fan is an idiot. People like Suzi the Sphere Hunter and Critique Quest on YouTube have plenty of insightful things to say. Your average video game comment leaver or redditor is just a "whoa, cool videogame" meme). RE7 brings back so many things from classic RE: a slow methodical pace, save rooms, a classic style map, limited inventory space, item boxes, emblem keys, limited ammo and healing, a small array of weapons, a relatively small number of enemies, a creepy isolated mansion, a lone protagonist, survival horror puzzles, a focus on exploring in order to escape, item-base progression, simple mechanics, a feeling of vulnerability, environmental storytelling, a relatively simple story, a harmonious balance of all these elements, and a short game length. Even the character switch at one point near the end of the game is classic RE. The design philosophy applied to RE7 is classic survival horror, through and through. This is so much the case that I noticed myself playing in a similar way to the classic era games. Checking my map to carefully plan the safest, most optimal route. Managing inventory for the least amount of backtracking. Making sure I checked every room as thoroughly as possible for useful items. Slowly making my way through a small but interconnected and well designed map. Feeling that sense of tension every time I opened an unfamiliar door. Getting absorbed in the atmosphere and taking my time. It's weird to say playing a horror game feels comforting, or cozy, but RE7 does, in a way. All of this isn't to say it feels just like playing the old games. It's a reinvention, rather than a re-creation, and I think that was the right route to take. 

RE7 is the first game to use Capcom's RE Engine, and it looks extremely good, especially its lighting. The one thing that doesn't look exceptional is the models for people and their movements and expressions. People move and make facial expressions in that weird video game way that never looks natural, and it's kind of impressive how far Capcom has come since 2017 in that department. This is greatly improved in the 2 & 3 remakes, which also both use the RE Engine. The first thing I noticed while replaying this game is how incredibly detailed everything is, including the sound design. You hear your character's slightly hesitant breath, his footsteps, the creaks and groans of an old house, and other muffled sounds that can't possibly be attributed to a house's age. All of the visual details let you imagine how every part of the Baker farm slowly fell into disrepair, the toll that multiple floods took on the place, and the gradual disintegration of a family's sanity and normalcy reflected in the physical dilapidation of the house. Like the Spencer mansion in 1996, the Baker property is as much a character as it is a setting. The return to a seemingly abandoned, sprawling house as a setting really helps establish that this is a return to form, a return to slow, creeping horror. The house is a shadowy urbex nightmare of abandoned spaces and black mold. The washed up tanker and the mines you explore in the game's final stretch aren't nearly as memorable or characterful as the house. RE7 succeeds in actually being scary more than most Resident Evil games. It's very good at being a horror game, but has all of the survival horror gameplay that makes the genre so satisfying.

The RE7 team wisely created a new narrative that’s almost entirely disconnected from the convoluted mythos the series has been building on since Code Veronica, but used the ending to leave the narrative open to that connection to the larger story. This, combined with the first person perspective, makes the game feel more intimate and more focused, which really works for it. It's really more a story about the house and its inhabitants, about Eveline, Mia, Zoe and the Baker family than it is about its protagonist, Ethan Winters. In my opinion, he's one of the weaker parts of the game. This series isn’t exactly renowned for its brilliant character writing, but he’s just kinda there, like American cheese. At least characters like Jill, Carlos, Ada, Claire, Chris, Sheva, Barry and Wesker are likeable and/or memorable in a video game character kinda way. Ethan feels intentionally designed to be the most unremarkable mid-30s white dude you could think of, almost like he's meant for a target audience, and he drags an excellent game down a little bit. Even Nemesis, the monster whose only line is "STAAAARRSs," is more memorable. They can really do better. So while I’m very excited to see what they do with RE8 after the quality of the last three games, I was disappointed to learn I’d still be playing as Ethan. I'm hoping they'll figure out a way to make him less lame. The other thing is, almost every RE protagonist is a member of S.T.A.R.S. or the BSAA, or someone who knows how to shoot a gun, so they at least have some explanation for how good they are at handling these situations. Ethan is literally just some guy who goes into a swamp to find his wife.

RE7 is at heart an amalgamation of a bunch of horror tropes and references, even references to the series itself, and yet it feels more like a loving homage to horror than a hackneyed rehash. Meet the family from Texas Chainsaw Massacre as you explore the mansion from Resident Evil/The People Under the Stairs and evade your wife who’s now a deadite from Evil Dead, meet the gross body horror man from From Beyond, shambling swamp monsters, an evil witch grandma, and the little girl from F.E.A.R. You also solve a puzzle from Saw in a serial killer’s murder maze. It's all bundled together and interwoven so well that it feels like something fresh and unique rather than horror's greatest hits.

Time to complete: 7:40

Like all of the best survival horror games, it ends right before it starts wearing out its welcome. The short length keeps any of its ideas from getting stale.

-Monster Review Corner-

There really aren't that many different kinds of monsters in this game, which I'm fine with. The principle zombie-likes of this game are slimy black sinewy humanoids called molded. Eveline, the bioweapon in the form of a little girl, is the cause behind everything bad that happened to the house and family, and she creates a black mold which infects those she wants to control, and which molded are made of. A lot of people think they're boring enemies, but personally I think they're perfectly suited to the setting of a dilapidated, water-damaged house that's being slowly reclaimed by the surrounding wilderness. The first enemy you actually encounter in this game is your wife Mia, who switches between normal Mia and evil deadite Mia. She also chops your hand off with a chainsaw, which is pretty fun. Jack is the Nemesis of RE7's early game. He's an unnaturally pallid middle-aged man who stalks you and has regenerative abilities which are later revealed to be... extensive. As you explore the house in the early game, you're always on edge because you know he could be lurking anywhere. In his later boss form, he's a bulging body horror monstrosity. Marguerite is another enemy who stalks you through the boat house with a creepy lantern. She creates bugs that attack you, so she's like a nasty bug crone. As a boss she employs hit and run tactics, lurking in the dark waiting for you, so slow and careful is the best way to fight her. Eveline is just the little girl from FEAR. No two ways about it. I'm honestly not a big fan of her, just because I kind of hate the creepy little kid horror trope.

Side note: I think this is the first game in the whole series without evil dogs.

Overall monster score: 7/10

Resident Evil 2 (2019)

To my taste, Resident Evil 2 remake might be the most ideal incarnation of Resident Evil that exists. It has everything that makes survival horror great, and it’s all implemented extremely well. Combine this with the gorgeous graphics and chilling atmosphere and you have a practically perfect survival horror game. It feels like the culmination of everything that worked in the series over the years, with the visual fidelity to do it justice. It’s a good remake because it does more than just faithfully recreate the original – it takes the best ideas from across the series. It has the methodical pace of classic survival horror, the backtracking and slow unlocking of new areas, the shadowy, eerie atmosphere of REmake, the highly detailed graphics and sound design of RE7, the item combining of RE3, Revelations 2 and RE7, the close over-the-shoulder view of RE4 and beyond, which notably feels like Rev 2. I’ve talked about how survival horror is a balance of things, and in that sense, RE2R is superbly balanced. Visually, it’s so detailed and nails the atmosphere so perfectly that it makes you want to move slowly just because it feels like you should. Moving forward feels foreboding. The way zombies look and move is scary, and lickers are terrifying. Narratively, it’s the same story but told better, and characters are much more human and believable than the original. Leon is just a regular dude, not the regular shithead he became in RE4 and RE6, and Claire is a great character. The Raccoon City police station is the strongest setting of the game, it’s all shadowed corridors, bloodstained walls and shattered windows. You really get the sense of it being a building that was formerly used as a museum, and the barricaded doors and aftermath of carnage everywhere help you imagine what happened as people fought for their lives, and lost, before you arrived. The sound design is extremely well done and detailed, which I never noticed until I played with headphones. (I wish I had paid more attention to sound design on this series playthrough. It can be an important part of survival horror). Gameplay is no slouch, either. Patient, precise shooting and tactical retreats pay off, and inventory management remains an integral part of progressing through the game. You eventually have much more inventory space than in the classic games, but it still never really feels like too much until right near the end of the game. Puzzles and item usage feel just how they should in survival horror. The Sherry and Ada portions, in Claire and Leon’s campaigns respectively, are both a nice change of pace and they’re short enough that they don’t wear out their welcome. 

Strangely, I don’t feel like I have much to say about this game, just because it so well embodies everything I’ve already cited as being good about survival horror. The police station especially is exceptional, in terms of atmosphere, map design, the layout of enemy encounters, methodical play, and balance. It’s very light on anything resembling fast paced action, and I love that. All in all, I think this is the most well-rounded and well-made Resident Evil game to date. It would be a great place to start the series, and a great way to show someone everything good about the genre. 

Time to complete: 

First run, Leon A: 7:49

Second run, Claire A: 6:39

Resident Evil 3 (2020)

Here are the common criticisms people have of this game, and why they’re wrong:

“It’s bad because they cut content from the original.”

First of all, these two are both excellent games, but they’re different enough to be completely separate games. Even the maps and the paths you travel through the game are totally different. Sure, it would be fun to see a clock tower area in the style of the remakes, but I’m not going to hold nonexistent content against a game, especially one that’s this good. If you want to relive RE3, it still exists. No one seemed to complain about how different RE2R is.

“It’s too short.”

It’s pretty much the same length as RE3, and it’s a fine length for a survival horror game. I like that the game is fast paced and concise, and this captures the spirit of classic survival horror. In this day and age I find short games refreshing, and brevity is a mark in a game’s favor rather than a mark against it. Also, when a game is short, I’m a million times more likely to want to replay it in the future. Case in point, this was the second time I played this game. If it took 20 hours, if it even took 10 hours, it would run too long. 

“It’s an action game, not survival horror.”

It’s more of an action game than RE2R, but even that is up for debate. I feel like throughout a lot of the game, you’re really not doing more shooting than you do in RE2R, and Jill isn’t really any more heavily armed than Leon or Claire end up being in that game. There are more boss fights, and more explosions, though, and by the end of the game you have a ton of ammo and resources, but they generally give you tons of stuff at the end of these games. I mentioned that original RE3 felt more like an action movie than the previous two games, and the remake is a lot better at being an action movie. It has a breakneck start where you’re almost immediately in a fight for your life against Nemesis as he bursts through the wall of Jill’s apartment and chases you through the streets, which culminates in the player ramming him off of a parking garage with a car. I’m normally not a big fan of explosive set pieces in games, but this one is really good and is great at setting the tone for the rest of the game. Just like the original, it’s more action oriented, but it’s just much better at action than the original RE3. I really wouldn’t classify it as an action game, like a lot of people seem to. Its pedigree and presentation are thoroughly survival horror, in my mind. Inventory management is an integral part of the game and most of the game has that slow survival horror gameplay. One thing I like less about this game than RE2R is that it has fewer puzzles. It’s not like it doesn’t have any, but they take a backseat, which is why I’d call it more action-oriented survival horror. 

“Nemesis doesn’t show up often enough.”

I really don’t know where this comes from, because I feel like if he showed up any more often than he already does it would get irritating and redundant. There are literally four separate boss fights against him, and multiple parts where he chases Jill around. How much more do you need in a five and a half hour game?

Now that that’s cleared up, on to other things.

The Resident Evil 2 Remake has a lot of noticeable similarities to the original version, but Resident Evil 3 Remake is basically a completely different game, and I honestly think that’s a good thing. Somehow, when you play the original RE3 in 2020, it feels more dated than RE2, and I thought RE2 was a better game. 

Back on the topic of action: this game does a thing video games do I don’t usually like, which is when the main character is often seen falling off of exploding things and staggering through corridors and burning buildings and thrown against cars and so on and so forth. Here, I don’t really mind it though, maybe because it’s not a long game and these parts take up little of its play time. It also makes the fight against Nemesis feel more immediate and tangible. It does often feel like playing an action movie, but it’s Terminator 2, not Michael Bay. Also, the bad Nemesis boss fights of the original are replaced with actually good boss fights. 

One thing I really like about RE3R is the way characters are presented. Jill and Carlos both feel like more relatable, human characters, with actual personalities, and this makes you much more invested in their fight to escape the city. They end up being two of my favorite versions of RE characters, and I hope we see them in future games, though I find that kind of unlikely. Resident Evil is really not great when it comes to consistency in characters. It’s a shame because I’d love to see a direct sequel with this version of Jill and Carlos. Apart from these two, even the rest of the cast are given a lot more character and feel human. 

The Carlos segment of the game in the hospital is much more atmospheric and interesting than the original’s Carlos section, and this one ends with a siege style fight much like the cabin fight of RE4. On the topic of RE4, this game has a document explaining that Nemesis was created by implanting some kind of parasite into a Tyrant, and the author of the document berates Umbrella for going the route of parasites due to their unpredictability. You also fight a few zombies in the game who were infected by Nemesis and grow alien-looking parasites on their heads. It can be assumed that this is tying the lore of these games in with the Las Plagas parasites of RE4 and RE5 and paving the way for the RE4 Remake. I think this is neat, even though I wish they wouldn’t remake RE4 on account of it being garbage. 

All in all, I really like this game, and it’s one of my favorites of 2020. It’s a very good survival horror game with tons of detail and character that can be finished in two or three sittings. I have pretty much no complaints about it other than the aforementioned lack of puzzles. It’s more fast paced survival horror, but it’s very good in it’s own right.    

Time to complete: 4:36 (2nd playthrough)

I don’t know the exact time of my first playthrough, but my old save file that’s right before the final boss was at 5:52. 

Final Thoughts

I feel like after playing all of these games, it should be asked: is the story of Resident Evil any good? The answer to that is… kinda, sometimes? But also no, not really? It’s often entertaining, scary, gory, tense and atmospheric in the way that a good horror movie is. It’s also a little silly, often in a charming way, like how you can always tell at any given moment that this setting is a Japanese interpretation of America. The story itself goes well off the rails by the time you reach RE4. I mean, you’re rescuing the president’s daughter from evil zombie villagers and space alien tentacle monsters and cultists and ogres and then the zombies get body armor and guns. (Let's just not ever talk about the story of Code Veronica.) But the story isn’t really the point, is it? I think the series is vastly improved because there is a narrative, and it just wouldn't be the same without it, but you won’t find anything too deep or meaningful in that narrative. The one saving grace is that a defining feature of the story is ultimately the fact that corporations and governments are evil and only care about profit, to the extent of sacrificing hundreds of people in multiple biological weaponry incidents. That aspect at least feels true to life, especially in the midst of a pandemic that neither our government, nor the extremely powerful corporations that exercise control over that government, are doing anything about. Umbrella is an international corporation that no one dares or bothers to oppose who maintains their own paramilitary force, has their own private prisons and research sites, and has their hands in every part of the government and infrastructure of Raccoon City and who knows how many other cities. The villain is always ultimately the unchecked corporation - even in RE7, the nightmare family that seems disconnected from the outside world is ultimately revealed by in-game documents to be directly linked to corporate experimentation.

In Revelations 2, as well as the new 2 & 3 remakes, the characters are at least likable and there’s nothing incredibly dumb like you’ll find in RE 4, 5 or 6. Some would cite the part at the end of RE3R where Jill uses a humongous railgun called the FINGeR (Ferromagnetic Infantry-use Next Generation Railgun) to kill the final form of Nemesis as something dumb, but they are wrong. The characters of RE2R, RE3R and Revelations 2 are likeable and human, so they seem to at least be going in the right direction in that regard. The storytelling of RE7, RE2R and RE3R returns to the more grounded approach of the original trilogy, which is a good thing, and I think a good sign for the future of the series and its setting. 

There’s something I’ve noticed about RE games, which might just boil down to my own personal preferences. In pretty much every game, you end up in an entirely new location in the final act of the game, and that last part is never as good as the rest. In RE2R, you spend most of the game in the police station, then go to the sewers (and the orphanage if you’re playing as Claire). For the last stretch of the game you end up at NEST, Umbrella’s secret underground lab, and this part is weaker than the rest. Likewise, the ship and mines areas in RE7 are weaker than the majority of the game, the lab in RE3 and its remake, the lab in REmake, even the last section of RE5. This isn’t to say these parts are necessarily bad, just that they tend to be worse than the rest. At the same time, I think they’re necessary changes of pace and locale. I think there are two reasons for this: one, the first locations of RE games tend to be very strong settings with lots of character, and two, it’s an an example of a problem all horror fiction faces, which is that the more you ramp up tension, the harder it gets to do it in believable and interesting ways. If horror goes on too long, situations become predictable and it loses its bite, and survival horror games are no exception. Ramping up tension and action necessarily compromises the things that initially make horror enjoyable, like slow and eerie pacing, the danger of an unknown threat, the vulnerability of character or player, and the slow unraveling of mysterious and fatal circumstances. At the same time, horror needs a final act, needs some kind of closure, otherwise the building of tension feels like it was for nothing and the story is unsatisfying. I have no idea what the solution to this is, except brevity, which good RE games are very good at. 

I liked a few RE games already, but playing through them all really made me realize I like this series more than I previously thought, and I like survival horror a lot more than I thought. The really bad and long mid-series slump that lasted about thirteen years can’t be ignored, but I really like more than half of the games in the series. It created an entire genre with a devoted following, and I feel like RE2R brought the genre back into the limelight somewhat. You can see the influence of the genre even on games that aren’t really in the genre, like Prey, Gone Home, Bloodborne, and Left 4 Dead. I’m really looking forward to playing through my list of other survival horror games. 

Things Resident Evil showed me that I love about survival horror:

-Slow paced, thoughtful gameplay. You’re rarely rushed, and action isn’t the focus. Generally there’s nothing dragging you along in a certain direction, forcing you to look at or interact with certain things. It’s up to you to figure out the way forward.

-An emphasis on exploration. This is tied in with the previous point. A lot of the fear and tension comes from not knowing what's through the next door or what will happen next, but knowing you have to explore to progress. These games have a lot of backtracking, a healthy sense of map knowledge and memory as a useful skill, and lots of item-based progression. As I mentioned in my note about puzzles before, the whole map feels like a puzzle to be solved.

-A feeling of vulnerability, reinforced by things like limited defense options, slow movement, scarcity of items, limited inventory space, and simple combat. This goes hand in hand with the sense of isolation usually found in survival horror games.

-Environmental storytelling. Setting details being revealed through documents, destruction, corpses, bloodstains, locales, and even puzzles. 

-They aren’t defenseless walking sims. It's on you to survive. Having a way to respond to threats, but not feeling like you ever have quite enough, is much scarier than being defenseless. It's because it's a game - mechanically, you know a game isn't just going to give you no defenses, then throw you to the wolves. Survival horror acknowledges its framework of video game, its limitations and advantages. It gives more of a feeling of success or failure hinging on your decisions rather than on scripted events. The player feels like they have more agency, even if it's not always strictly the case.

-Making use of silence, something games aren't generally good at. This ties in with quiet time, something I wish more games were aware of. That is, times when the player is just quietly left to their own devices, exploring alone, solving puzzles, reading notes. You're not in danger 100% of the time, which gives the danger teeth.

-Simplicity of play, or accessibility. These games generally don’t contain any difficult mechanics or concepts that need to be explained, have little need for tutorials, and are easy to understand and play. Things like difficulty settings, auto aim, and the assist modes seen in RE2R and RE3R expand accessibility too. I think difficulty goes in this category too. Honestly, most survival horror games aren’t all that hard, because if you died all the time, you’d get bored and frustrated. Survival horror games seem to actually want you to have a good time. Imagine that. 

-Mostly short playtime. A genre that's often good at not wasting your time. It’s very good for people without much time or people who like to actually be able to finish games and move on to other games, or replay games. It might sound weird, but also, sometimes I feel like really long games have something to hide under all that repetitive content.

-New weapons or abilities feel earned, because you generally go through a lot to get to them and they’re not handed out very often.

-A harmonious balance of elements. When a survival horror game is good, it elegantly combines all of the aforementioned traits.

RE Score Sheet

Endings where I flew away in a helicopter: 8 Crank or valve handles collected and turned: 16 Zombies or dogs or birds that burst through windows: 19 Object pushing puzzles: 14 Shaped indentations filled (including cogs): 71 Jump scares: 13 Puzzles where you configure shapes or valves or gears or numbers or lights a certain way: 18 Oversized animal types: 12 (Spider, Bee, Moth, Snake, Shark, Worm, Scorpion, Cockroach, Centipede, Bat, Salamander, A Different Bat) Rooms with monsters in tubes: 8 Gigantic mutant plants: 4 Times when it looked like a character died but they didn't really: 10 Secret subterranean labs: 10 Switches that change the water level: 5 Batteries/cables attached to things: 9 Clock towers: 4 Vaccines synthesized: 4 Self destruct sequences: 7 Helicopters shot down or otherwise destroyed right before they were used to escape: 6 Unique viruses: 9 (Progenitor Virus, T-Virus, G-Virus, T-Veronica Virus, Uroburos Virus, T-Abyss Virus, C-Virus, T-Phobos Virus, Mold Virus)

Resident Evil Tier List

Obligatory tier list disclaimer: tier lists are stupid and bad and fail to acknowledge the many nuances of things.

[sg2tiger]

It’s that time of year when I rise from my tumblr grave and come to post the end-of-year look at the games I played

As always, my lengthy ramblings can be found under the cut. I’m thinking of posting a more trimmed down version on Twitter (where I am also pretty inactive but have slightly more of a presence than Tumblr these days).

—————————————— Assassin's Creed Syndicate (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

Coming directly after finishing Unity I moved onto Syndicate, knowing that it was to be the last 'real' Assassin's Creed game (with the next two moving to a more RPG-style and set in periods before the assassins and templars really existed in their current forms). I had actually originally planned to skip Unity after its terrible launch, and had purchased - and even started playing - Syndicate back in 2017...but my computer at the time was struggling with just the prologue, averaging 20-30 FPS. Once the game actually arrived at London proper, my framerate tanked to 11 FPS or lower, and I had to put the game on the backburner until I'd upgraded my computer enough to handle it.

Ultimately I'm glad that it worked out the way it did, and I did end up going back and playing Unity before Syndicate, because the games are definitely very comparable. Both are a return to the older games' focus on exploring urban environments after the past several moved the cities themselves largely out of focus, and the gameplay of Syndicate is basically a polished up version of the new system introduced in Unity. The controls were smoother and tighter, and much appreciated fixes were made to some of Unity's worst offenders, like having automatic cover behind objects now instead of doing it manually, and the 'enter' button prompt that appears when you're over a window to climb inside - something I believe I mentioned in my Unity review as one of the worst things (gameplay-wise) about that game. Also, the whistle button makes a return after its extremely baffling removal in Unity, making it actually fun and worthwhile to kill enemies from hiding spots once again.

Combat in Syndicate was decent enough once I got used to it, but personally I really did prefer Unity's style. Unity was the first AC game where combat felt genuinely tactical, and where it was possible to get overwhelmed and wrecked by enemies at ANY level, even postgame with all your upgrades and gear - thus, encouraging stealth more, and not letting it get to the point where you're swarmed by huge groups of enemies in the first place. Syndicate has some cool multi-kill moves, but I didn't even figure out how to properly execute those until the very end of the game (when I was replaying the highest-level fightclub over and over trying to get Robert Topping's rep level maxed). Aside from some fancy visuals on the killmoves, though, the combat felt watered down to me - press X to attack, B to dodge the enemy's heavily-telegraphed incoming attacks, and occasionally A on those assholes that block. I dunno, I just really enjoyed Unity's variety with stuff like the slower heavy attack, and ground execution, even if the skill points system to unlock them made them mid-to-late game abilities. In Syndicate, like most AC games before it, once you hit around the midgame point and have more gear and better equipment, you become a one-man (or woman) army and there's no challenge left - I remember I got a 124 hit combo without taking a single blow during one of the final bouts in the highest-level fight club, because it's just way too easy to play the hit, hit, dodge, hit hit dodge, blockbreak hit hit dodge game. It's my understanding that Origins changes the combat system yet again, though, so we'll see if I find that any more satisfying.

One of the main new things about Syndicate - and one I've seen a LOT of negativity about across the internet - is the rope launcher (AKA grappling hook). How realistic the steampunk-esque gadget it aside, gameplay-wise I actually liked it and thought it made sense, since London's buildings are significantly taller than anything in the past games. Here's my take on it - it's nothing new for an AC game to introduce a new traversal gimmick that's exclusive to that specific title and its setting, because it makes sense in that setting. Revelations had the hookblade, which in a way was like the proto-rope launcher. AC III had the whole 'treerunning' system because of its frontier setting, which had a very different feel to it mechanically than climbing around on buildings. And of course, Black Flag was all about ship travel. But aside from Rogue basically being Black Flag II, all of these things have largely been restricted to those specific games that introduced them, because they made SENSE for those particular settings and environments - like, just because the Ottoman assassins used hookblades to travel around Constantinople, Ubisoft didn't make the hookblade a permanent part of the AC hero's repetoire going forward. I feel like the rope launcher is no different...it exists to make traversal in THIS particular setting a little less tedious, because having to manually climb some of these buildings the old-fashioned way would otherwise be a nightmare. Besides, it's also completely optional and you CAN simply climb around the old-fashioned way if you so choose - aside from maybe the tutorial mission when you first get the thing, I can't think of any point where you were forced to use the rope launcher at all. Personally I really liked it - I don't think it 'killed' the franchise's iconic parkour system but rather integrated with it. Zip from the ground up the side of the building to a rooftop, then run and hop between the roofs and poles and rafters like usual, then zip across a large gap to a different rooftop, climb up and over a chimney, and jump across onto another roof. Sure, there's nothing stopping you from abusing the rope launcher to zip from place to place exclusively, just as there's nothing stopping you from not using the rope launcher at all. But that's exactly why it's stupid to complain about it. It's all about how much or how little the player feels like using it...and I mostly used it to fill in the gaps of otherwise standard AC roof running, mixing it in and integrating it with that gameplay, rather than replacing it. Maybe that's why I actually had fun with it.

The last new thing gameplay-wise I guess would be carriages. Once I got the hang of using them properly (gunning for first place in all the street races is very educational), it was fun enough, I suppose. I don't think the Grand Theft London jokes are lost on anyone, but personally GTA isn't my type of game so I can't say I especially LOVED the carriage driving either. I don't really care about the 'historical accuracy' of having video game horsecarts handle more like video game automobiles, I just don't really tend to like driving in video games in general. I also feel really guilty every time I crush an innocent bystander to death, which is VERY hard to avoid when you drive these things, so I think I spent a good while consciously avoiding driving unless necessary. Smashing through inanimate objects and causing wanton destruction is pretty fun, though. All in all not one of my favorite new features of the game, but I didn't hate it, either - which is a good thing given how many missions force you to get behind the reins.

As far as the story and characters go, Syndicate may not have been a marvel, but it was leagues above Unity. Jacob and Evie are likable enough, and while there's the usual share of forgettable one-note assassination targets there were also quite memorable ones like Pearl Attaway, Maxwell Roth and of course Starrick himself. I actually really liked Starrick as a character, though I felt it was a shame how little screentime he actually got considering he's the Big Bad behind the scenes of everything going on - I suppose that fit his role as sort of the businessman who uses his vast network of employees handle situations while he sits in his office and comfortably sips tea, but the out-of-focus nature he himself had in the story felt like a waste of such a charismatic character. It was however nice to see a return to the modern day story, even if it was still pretty far shoved into the background...it was at least THERE. And even Desmond got acknowledged for the first time in a while, which was nice. It's unfortunate that I know now the Juno plot was wrapped up in the COMICS rather than the actual games (something I really have no interest in reading but at this point feel like I have to just for closure), but if I had played Syndicate at the time when it came out I know I'd have been excited by a lot of the revelations that happened at the end, especially considering how far into the background Unity shoved the modern day and Juno storyline.

I think my biggest character complaint would fall to Henry Green, who's supposed to be your assassin mentor but felt like little more than a satellite around Evie for the entire game. When you first arrive in London and he gives you the rundown on how things are in the city, he reminded me of Yusuf from Revelations - someone more familiar with the goings-on than the player character, and a reliable companion and guide who the player can count on. After that, however, he felt pushed into the background and never really DID anything except, of course, accompany Evie on some of her missions. His whole thing is that he's not really a field agent, and yet the game forces him into the field JUST so he can tag along with Evie as part of one of the most forced obligatory romances I've seen in a video game. There is absolutely no chemistry between the two - Evie spends the whole first half of the game basically being defined by her work, and I NEVER got the sense that she really felt anything about Henry even when it became obvious he was interested in her. And then the game forces the whole 'oh Evie let her feelings get in the way and saved Henry and oh she's so conflicted because she's in love even though they've known each other for probably a couple of months at most but oh mixing romance and work is wrong but oh apparently Father and Mother were very much in love and it didn't compromise their work as assassins so it's okay and YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES I'LL MARRY YOU'. I was cringing the entire time - but of course, it's Ubisoft, so it had to be this way.

Speaking of Ubisoft's typical treatment of female characters, though, I DO have a few criticisms about Evie as well.  We all know about the controversy Ubisoft got itself into for saying female characters were 'too much work' during Unity, and Syndicate seems like a pretty obvious response to that backlash. Giving her a co-starring role with her brother made sense, too - if it was ONLY a female protagonist, right after the backlash, Ubisoft would be accused of caving to pressure and find itself with another controversy. I think it was a smart decision to do it this way, and the story missions are pretty evenly split so you're forced to play as each of them about equally, even disregarding who you choose to play as during the open world segments (though Evie probably should have been doing something during Sequence 8 while Jacob was off blowing shit up with Roth).

My problem is more with Evie's personality...or rather, the way she's used in the story. Jacob, like most previous AC protagonists, is flawed. His flaw is his impulsiveness and tendency to rush into situations without thinking of the consequences...those consequences then becoming immediately apparent when Evie has to rush in and quickly fix his mistakes. Evie however is more focused and methodical, putting all her attention on hunting Lucy Thorne and the Shroud. Ultimately the message here, I think, is that both of the twins need EACH OTHER because when they work alone they don't see the big picture. However it felt to me more like Evie's job was just cleaning up after her clumsy brother, because she's so perfect and infallible and always right. It felt to me like in the backlash over 'no female characters' they overcorrected somewhat with Evie, because she comes off far less flawed than her brother. Arguably her flaw is that by focusing too much on the Shroud she ignores the rampant corruption eating away at London, but the story never really focuses on that angle...Evie just comes off as always being right when Jacob inevitably fucks up the next big thing. You could also say the whole 'oh no I put personal feelings before the mission' is supposed to be her flaw, but the story also goes out of its way in the end to say 'no, it's okay to do that, your father was wrong'...so, also not a flaw. Then what IS Evie's flaw? I really can't see one...and I feel like that makes her less interesting as a character. I certainly didn't DISLIKE Evie, but I feel like she just didn't have as much personality as her brother, whose flaw was more apparent and impacted his development more (feeling betrayed by Pearl, and how apathetic he got in the aftermath with Roth, in particular). Evie just...spends half the game being perfect, being right, cleaning up after her clumsy brother, and then falling victim to a romantic plot tumor. Since she was the first playable female assassin as far as most fans are concerned (it's okay, Aveline, *I* remember you) this just seems like a shame to me...a wasted opportunity to make Evie just as interesting and flawed and capable of making mistakes as her brother (and no, compromising the mission by RESCUING ANOTHER HUMAN BEING FROM CERTAIN DEATH is NOT a flaw, only sociopaths would consider that a flaw, and the game even makes it clear that it also does not consider it a flaw). I think Ubisoft was probably just too afraid to make their first major female assassin come off negatively, so they played it safe - TOO safe, resulting in Evie ultimately being more bland and uninteresting than Jacob was. Don't get me wrong, they absolutely fucked up on multiple levels with Elise in Unity, but at least she felt like an interesting and nuanced character to me...even if she DID get stuffed in the fridge.

Anyway...ultimately I had fun with Syndicate. Worth mentioning that I did NOT get any of the DLC, because the reviews for both the Maharaja and Jack the Ripper DLCs on Steam were extremely negative and didn't seem worth it at all...nor did (to me) the assorted extra missions or the murder mystery packs. Murder mysteries were an alright change of pace in Unity, but they were also way too easy and certainly not interesting enough for me to want to pay extra for. I've got 98 hours logged for 100% completing Syndicate sans-DLC, compared to 138 in Unity for doing the same + Dead Kings, but Syndicate FELT longer to me. The world was bigger and I felt like I spent more time playing around in it, and aside from my aforementioned complaints about combat I feel like it did just about everything better than Unity. I've seen a lot of generally mixed reviews around the internet and even some people saying they thought Unity was better, but I can't really agree with that. All in all Syndicate was a solid and enjoyable game, and may quite possibly be the last Assassin's Creed game of its kind given the direction we've moved into with Origins and Odyssey, so...perhaps someday people will look back on it more fondly.

—————————————— Assassin's Creed Origins (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Recommended ——————————————

Within the first 5 minutes of the game (if not less), things already felt innately...off. I knew that Origins retooled a lot of the game to be more RPG-like, but I guess I completely underestimated the extent to which EVERYTHING would change. After all, Unity sort of kicked off the trend of having a basic skill point system and different purchasable weapons/armor, and Syndicate furthered it with an even more in-depth skill tree and the reintroduction of crafting. I figured Origins would simply further refine these RPG-like systems, and tidy up combat yet again, which had also seen some changes in both Unity and Origins.

In any case, one of the first things (literally) I had to do was find the options menu and change the default control scheme, which is SUCH a huge departure from the system the series has been using for 10 years that it left my muscle memory crying. Fortunately the 'Alternate' control preset is far closer to the classic and familiar style (with RT as the run/climb button, for instance), and the PC version at least also allows you to rebind the controls further...which I did (particularly to put the drop/parkour down button on B, as it was in Unity and Syndicate). Rebinding the controls too much *can* lead to some issues with overlap and even breaking certain functions (I can no longer dive underwater with B presumably because I set it as my 'drop' button, so now it does a dash underwater instead...so I do have to use the C key on my keyboard to actually dive now) but ultimately those snags are pretty minor. That said, the resulting new controls during chariot races being so heavily concentrated on the right side of my controller did leave my hand seriously hurting after my first racing tournament.

(I wrote a lot about my thoughts on this right after starting, coming off Syndicate and feeling the unfamiliarity of the game hard, and it comes off a lot like I’m rambling about the Good Ol’ Days of AssCreed and how different Origins is from that experience more than an actual review of the game. While I think a lot of what I ranted about is still valid, it’s also not really about THIS game, so I think I’m just gonna skip over a lot of that and get into my actual, I-finally-finished-the-game thoughts instead)

Ultimately I enjoyed it a lot, and I did 100% complete the whole game + both DLCs, but at the end of the day I have to stand by my verdict that it’s not really an ASSASSIN'S CREED game as we’ve come to know them for so long. Did I have a lot of fun taking out entire camps with the predator bow before anyone could catch me in the act? Very much. But that's about the only kind of SNEAKING I felt like I ever had to do in the game, compared to older entries that had a wider variety of stealth options. Bayek was definitely more of a warrior than an assassin, IMO. I feel like, for all the flak it got as a game (and much of it deserved), Unity was the best AC as far as stealth mechanics and mission options. Syndicate refined those and fixed things like moving behind cover, but with Jacob being more of a brawler that also meant there was a lot of that game you could easily do without having to be super stealthy. Bayek, and the push towards the more RPG-like systems in Origins, makes it pretty clear that we likely won't be getting a return to classic AC form any time soon, and while I enjoyed Origins a lot that still makes me very sad.

Still, I look forward to Odyssey whenever it decides to go on sale enough for me to grab it, because Origins WAS a lot of fun. I ended up clocking 192 hours in it, completing all the DLC, and getting every achievement, so clearly I enjoyed the game. It's more just a bittersweet feeling that the AC franchise as we knew it is probably dead, as Ubisoft moves further and further away from the franchise staples, and continues to bury the modern day story and conspiracy theory angles deeper beneath the historical storyline.

(I also had some rants about how Aya/Amunet would have made a better protagonist of a proper Assassin’s Creed game while Bayek was more the protagonist of a general revenge story and how Aya, as she was, was much like Evie in that I didn’t really like her much and feel like I could/should have liked her more if she was utilized better as a more robust character, but in the interest of not going off on this game forever I’m gonna snip that part as well)

—————————————— 7 Days to Die (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

Another of the plethora of survival/building/crafting games that have been all the rage these days. Sorta like ARK, but instead of dinosaurs, it's zombies. Zombie games aren't personally my cup of tea, because I am a big baby, and the game has a lot of elements that I think would classify it as survival horror and not just survival/building/crafting. Solo, I would never be able to tolerate this game, but with a friend or two, I found it quite fun. It scratches a lot of the same itches as ARK but the survival aspects take more of a forefront, whereas in ARK once you've progressed to metal tools and flak armor the temperature and hunger management aspects become little more than a minor nuisance.

When we started out, we were right on the border of the snow biome (once my friend trekked from their spawn point and found me, that is), so the cold and just barely avoiding constant starvation (sometimes) was an ever-present threat. It really felt like we were being pushed to raid the nearby houses in hopes of finding scraps of food and resources to keep us alive. After a while we were able to gear up enough to move slightly further out to a more temperate biome, near a large cornfield, where we could begin cultivating our own crops. Once starvation became manageable we were able to shift out focus to other tasks, like expanding our base in preparation for the titular 7th day (though it was the 30th day due to adjusted server settings for us) - the Bloodmoon, where swarms and swarms of zombies attack your base and you have to survive the night.

This sort of PVE tower defense mode is something I've often wished was a thing in ARK (and no, orbital supply drops aren't the same thing) - PVP is too toxic for my tastes, but a constant problem in that game is reaching the eventual 'now what?' point where you're practically unfuckable and nothing is a challenge anymore. Having that sort of ever-present danger and challenge to look forward to (or dread, if done right) keeps PVE gameplay in this sort of game a lot more interesting because you can't just sit on your laurels and get complacent. PVE builds are generally more about making buildings that look nice and less about fortifying them with adequate defenses because those rexes that stomp through your front yard can't bite through metal, so why worry? I like having that balance, where I can build a base that I think looks nice and is functional with storage and crafting and whatnot, but I ALSO like the idea that if my defenses aren't up to snuff...I can kiss my ass goodbye.

So the Bloodmoon mechanic, while terrifying, is a big draw of this game IMO. There's also the other side of that PVP coin that sounds fun in theory but is not in practice (because real people are assholes): raiding other peoples' bases. Of course, zombies spawn randomly in the overworld and you can run into them any time during your travels and resource runs, but the map is also littered with abandoned houses and other buildings like stores, factories, hospitals and even creepy mad scientist castles. These places often have pretty good resources and loot, so you're encouraged to explore them...but of course they are also crawling with zombies. And the zombies are not always out in the open for you to get off a quick headshot on, either - often times they'll hide, inside closets or above ceiling tiles, to ambush you if you're careless. You really have to be prepared for anything, and willing to drop heavy loot and run away if the going gets particularly tough. To me this feels more engaging than just killing stuff out in the overworld, because it's like I actually have to conquer someone else's castle and that feels more like a concrete goal to me.

In general it feels like a fairly standard, but enjoyable, early access (but frequently updated) survival/building/crafting game. However, these little things kept me coming back for more once I'd grown bored of being the unconquerable dino king of ARK. Would I recommend it? Only to a specific audience, but that audience has probably already played it. For me the general survival horror atmosphere and frequent jumpscares in narrow corridors when a zombie jumps out at you from above the ceiling and shit is a lot...even playing with my friend, I basically played the support sniper role in combat while they had the frontline with melee weapons, and that didn't stop my heart from leaping out of my chest on many occasions. I remember that time we raided a huge pharmacy building on a day where it just would not stop raining...the rain sounds in this game are VERY realistic, and also very loud. I could barely hear my friend over the rain half the time, let alone the warning sounds of nearby zombies being drowned out by the storm. We had to stay the night, and well into the next day it was STILL raining...we had so many close calls in there, and even a couple actual deaths (fortunately we had temporary beds set up in a safe room so we wouldn't have to trek back from base). Once the rain finally stopped, and we returned to base and called it a night IRL, I felt such relief...I hadn't realized how much I was ACTUALLY STRESSED by the game in such a tense situation. Which...is that "fun"? Again, I think it depends on the type of person, and even then is probably very situational. I think I realized in the aftermath that I did not have fun that night, but when I was there in the moment, the tension was certainly immersive.

So yeah. It's a fun game if you have a good friend or two to play it with, and if you think you can handle horror elements and potential jumpscares. Which I can't. But my friend is very supportive and understanding  of that so I didn't have to feel like a big baby when I got audibly startled during our gameplay sessions, so I really do think WHO you play it with can make a big difference, too.

—————————————— Ultimate Skyrim (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

A bit of an odd thing to review, I know. Ultimate Skyrim is obviously not a game in itself, but as a modpack that completely revises the way the game is played I felt like it was worth mentioning...especially since it gives me something to pad out this very small list with.

I actually first heard about Ultimate Skyrim a couple years ago, but back then the install process was so daunting that even I (someone who can spend weeks perfecting my load order whenever I go to replay Skyrim) was put off by it. Plus, at the time, it was still in version 3 and I knew there was a version 4 in the works, so I figured I may as well wait for that before I gave it a try.

When I got the itch to replay Skyrim again, as I seem to every year once fall and winter come around, I remembered UltSky existed and check in to see that version 4 was out, had full gamepad support (essential for me), AND the install process was easier than ever thanks to the Automaton tool. So I thought, why not?

It was my first time trying Requiem, but I'm no stranger to some of the basic concepts the mod introduces, since some of my mainstay mods (ex. Advanced Adversary Encounters) make similar changes. Plus, a solid half of the UltSky pack consisted of mods I've played regularly, so I didn't think it would be that hard to acclimate to.

I was wrong.

Requiem changes much more than I expected it to, which, in hindsight, explains why practically every mod out there requires a patch to work with it. The constant stamina drain that you need to account for with buffs from food, made worse if you decide to go heavy armor...no natural health regen, and all potions being heal-over-time instead of flat instant heals...the perk tree really requiring thought and planning to budget your points right and not spread yourself too thin, and even getting 'locked in' to the type of standing stone you choose as your birthsign. All kinds of little elements piling up to make your early game a living nightmare.

I'll cut right to the chase here: I found that I don't much like Requiem. Now, I'm not opposed to challenge, and pretty much every playthrough I mod my game to MAKE the game more challenging because vanilla Skyrim is such a cakewalk. But it's the WAY Requiem changes things, the specific mindset and vision that toes the line between 'fun' challenging and 'you must be a masochist or hardcore minmaxer to enjoy this' that doesn't appeal to me specifically. I much prefer my usual combination of Advanced Adversary Encounters + Wildcat + Ultimate Combat + Mortal Enemies + maybe True Armor (I only played a little with it on my last pre-UltSky playthrough but I liked it) to make fights more deadly and tactical. Requiem makes combat more difficult, absolutely, but the vision is different, and it feels like minmaxing is the answer to surviving encounters more than strategy and skill. Like, if I don't have the right gear, or perked myself in a specific way, or else carry an assload of fortify potions (something I hate even in the base game but is made even more annoying to me through Requiem and UltSky's unpaused menu system)...then my chances of surviving are very, very slim. And to me that just isn't fun.

A deleveled world is kind of fun, though I'd never tried it before...that sense of progression where you can't just take on a cave of warlocks at level 2 gives me something to work towards, though it does also feel somewhat limiting as far as where you start. One of the appeals of alternate start mods and WHY they're among the most popular is that freedom of not having to go Helgen > Riverwood > Whiterun, but a deleveled world also makes me feel like I'm being punished if I get a random start up in Windhelm, and that I have to head down and chump it up in Whiterun anyway, because that's where the weak enemies who won't oneshot me are. I'm sort of whatever about that aspect though.

To me it's like...I can't agree with it being called 'the roleplaying overhaul' because having to focus so much on how I spend my perks, what spells I learn, my gear, which enchantments I use, having to carry at least 3 weapons at any given time and encumber my loot-loving ass because I never know if I might need a mace or a sword...the list goes on. I'm not trying to shit on it because there's clearly a huge community of people who love what Requiem brings to the table - they're just all things that don't appeal to me PERSONALLY when I can usually think of a mod that makes the same sort of changes to my game but does so in a way that I find more appealing, that's all.

So then...if I'm feeling this negative about Requiem (the very core of Ultimate Skyrim), why did I give it a positive rating? Well, because even if I don't love Requiem, I still think Ultimate Skyrim is fun.

I know that probably sounds ridiculous. But to me, I think considering Ultimate Skyrim as just 'that one Requiem modpack' is really selling it short. UltSky adds a lot on top of that core Requiem experience, and while some of that makes the struggle to survive the early levels even MORE hellish than base Requiem, I think it actually manages to bring the roleplaying and - dare I say - immersion - back to the table.

Of course, it's got a lot of the classic 'immersion' mods in there...iNeed, Frostfall, Campfire, even somewhat more niche stuff like Bathing in Skyrim. Needs mods I can give or take, sometimes I don't bother with them because the micromanagement can often feel more annoying than fun (I prefer cooking mods that make meals feel more worth eating with long-lasting buffs than mods that actually make me 'hungry', usually). I'd never used Frostfall before for similar reasons despite being very aware of it for years because of its popularity...I actually didn't dislike it though, and it really does make Skyrim feel harsher and like you have to prepare more for your journeys.

The thing about UltSky is that it's not just a big rec list of mods thrown together haphazardly. BelmontBoy has actually taken the enormous amount of time to patch all these mods together to make them work as one seamless, cohesive entity. Of course, it's not perfect - at the end of the day Skyrim was simply not designed with a lot of these features in mind, and the MCM configuration at the start of every new character you make is a huge pain in the ass. But once you get it going, the functions all fit pretty well together...planning my daily activities and general gameplay loop around the weather and time of day, making sure I drop into the tavern and have a bite to eat, deposit any goods in a safe chest and my (weighted) gold off with the bank service, and making sure I go to bed at a decent hour and sleep well.

Ultimately (heh) it makes Skyrim feel like a completely different game, and changes the way you play significantly. I may not agree with all of those changes, but I can't deny the appeal of having an easy to install pack that doesn't take me 3 weeks to perfect before I can play, and where the mods are all designed to work well with each other so unexpected conflicts don't pop up halfway into my playthrough when it's too late to fix them. The controller support and things like iEquip and EasyWheel are also conveniences that changed the game for me, and I will definitely be planning to make use of in future non-UltSky playthroughs as well...for that matter, I also found myself surprisingly enjoying the unpaused menus (though I disabled it for merchants because I got tired of their idle dialogue firing constantly while I was shopping).

Of course, being me, I did make some personal changes to my UltSky install (particularly things like Noxcrab's and kbeazy's Req and UltSky patches to tone down some of the more masochistic elements of Requiem), but the fact that it's as accessible and easy as it is to get up and running even for people who DON'T obsess over their load orders is a big deal, I think.

Is it the ultimate Skyrim experience? No, absolutely not. The ultimate Skyrim experience will always be the one you build yourself to your preferences, and don't have to make due with features you don't like. But I do really appreciate and respect the work BelmontBoy has done with Ultimate Skyrim, and I would absolutely recommend it to anyone who wants to try something a bit different.

Though I'm done playing it for the time being, I've still got another playthrough planned that I think will work pretty well with UltSky...it was a character I was really having fun with, but basically had to abandon due to mod complications fucking up my save and me not having the energy to troubleshoot. I think reviving him in UltSky would be pretty fun, so next time that Skyrim urge inevitably hits me, that's my plan.

—————————————— Ciconia no Naku Koro Ni: Phase 1 (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Recommended ——————————————

Alright, alright. Ciconia’s not really a GAME, but as the first When They Cry in almost a decade I feel like it would be a crime for me to not include it on my list.

Worth noting, first of all, that I pretty much never buy games on day 1 at full price. I wait for them to go on sale for $20 or under, even if it means waiting a few years (which is why I'm usually so behind the times on the games I've played). But we've already waited 8 years since Umineko ended for the next When They Cry, when we didn’t even know if the franchise was gonna continue AT ALL. Besides that, the most fun part of a new WTC is getting to discuss it with people while it's exciting and fresh, and waiting around for a sale would mean missing out on all that. As it is, I didn't get into Umineko until a little before the release of EP5, so I missed out on all the live discussions for the question arcs while they were still new. I wasn't about to sit around and wait a year or more for the price to drop. Ciconia was a rare full-price day 1 purchase for me, and I finished it over the course of the release weekend.

Since I already reviewed the game after finishing my liveblog in the 07th Expansion Central Discord server, I’m going to basically reiterate and build upon what I said then when my thoughts were still fresh.

I enjoyed Phase 1 a lot and it definitely surprised me in how long it was, and how polished just about everything was (maybe except the small BGM selection, but that will surely be expanded in future phases). We had animations, detailed backgrounds and sprites, it definitely feels like a big improvement over Umineko in the presentation department...but it still falls victim to the same issue Umineko EP1 and Higurashi's Onikakushi had, something that Ryukishi seems to have trouble with in general - PACING.

To be FAIR, the whole setting of Ciconia did necessitate a lot more exposition than the previous When They Cry entries. Umineko and Higurashi took place in 1980's Japan - a time and place that actually existed. Ciconia takes place in the far future and had a LOT of worldbuilding Ryukishi basically had to establish from the ground up, not to mention taking place on a global scale featuring parts of the world that the average Japanese reader might not be familiar with, especially with how the factions of A3W also make those parts of the world so different than we know them today. So I DO understand why it had to drag on like that, to a degree, because Ryukishi clearly had a LOT he wanted to convey in both worldbuilding and social and political commentary (and a lot of what seemed like very clear Take Thats at people who missed and continue to miss the point of Umineko to this day, even after the EP8 manga adaptation should have cleared all doubts).

Even so...it's still hard to actually push through huge infodumps like that, before anything really engaging happens to hook you in. We had to learn about the state of the world and the factions and all the tech and just about everything and I do admire HOW MUCH worldbuilding he came up with here and how he managed to eventually explain just about all of it in a way that left me feeling like I had a pretty solid grasp on how the world worked...but at the same time, it was hard to just sit down and will myself to read through so much lengthy exposition.

I think if I had to compare it to Higurashi and Umineko's starting episodes, the beginning paced much better. Phase 1 was much LONGER than either of those two first installments, and it still managed to sprinkle a lot of intrigue into the early parts that made it a little easier to get into than, say, Higurashi spending an absurdly long time on the slice of life club game antics before the real meat of the story began, or Umineko going on and on ad nauseum about the family's history and financial problems when I'm just sitting here waiting for the witch to show up.

But while Higurashi and Umineko dragged their feet through the beginning, I think the worst of Ciconia's pacing was actually the MIDDLE section.

There was a point where it seemed that, after every genuinely interesting scene that left me curious and wanting more, I got teleported back to the bathhouse against my will to listen to the same 4 characters have the exact same conversation for 20 minutes before I could finally get back to the next interesting scene...only for it to happen again after that.

That endless pattern of:

>world is going to shit despite our efforts >we're just chess pieces and have no power >cheer up miyao you're having an impact on everyone and we can do it >let's protect the walls of peace together!!!! >shit goes wrong again, rinse, repeat

Look, I GET it. You're all comrades working together to support the walls of peace, and you're also treasured friends fighting against the corrupt and uncaring adults who don't understand or appreciate all you young gauntlet knights have had to endure for the sake of maintaining those walls of peace. And how no matter what they try to do to get you to hate each other or kill each other, you'll always be friends who will work together, to maintain the walls of peace!!! I GET IT. YOU DON'T NEED TO KEEP SAYING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER. I KNOW that I am reading a When They Cry novel and that, to appreciate the full ironic pain that comes once these characters DO turn on each other and the cruel slaughter begins, I need to see them when they are insisting that they'll never hurt each other, but I'd rather SEE them bond than just be TOLD over and over that they're comrades supporting the walls of peace!!

The thing is, aside from a small handful (Cairo in particular), I DO feel like we got to see the characters bond. So why, on top of that, did we ALSO need to keep repeating walls of peace walls of peace walls of peace over and over again BESIDES? It felt like unnecessary padding at that point, when so many interesting things were going on, but we just had to keep cutting away from them to watch the same tired scene play out at least once per chapter.

It probably also doesn't help that Ciconia is a beast composed of two themes/genres I'm not really a big fan of - sci-fi/futuristic, and heavy political/social commentary. So the fact that the beginning was spent largely explaining all the futuristic sci-fi technology, and the middle was spent going on a lot about the political angle, may not have helped hold my interest as much. Not to say I didn't enjoy the story, just that those factors may have made it even harder for me to latch on than it may have been for other people. Still, I've heard a lot of people voice the pacing complaint for various reasons so I don't think it's ALL me, there.

In general, Phase 1 was a rollercoaster ride. I was really drawn in heavily by the conspiracy theory and mystery elements, but found myself grow bored during the more politically-charged parts. The social commentary was certainly topical and I appreciated the fact that Ryukishi had a lot he wanted to say (which almost seemed to be making up for how he kept Umineko vague due to it being 'difficult to talk about' certain key subjects of that story), but the parts about the strife between the factions over geographical and political issues were less engaging to me. The more conspiracy-laden bits of intrigue grabbed me a lot more - I felt a lot of overlap between that angle of the story and the early Assassin's Creed games (before the modern day got more and more shafted), with that strong angle of 'history is written by the winners and there's a whole bunch of stuff that happened in the past that is being deliberately covered up', and I really like that. The strong biblical undercurrent especially enhances that sort of mystique that makes ancient conspiracies so fascinating...the idea that there could be secrets from antiquity that have fallen into myth and legend due to the meddling of ancient sects like the Three Kings, seeking to guide humanity down what they consider to be 'the right path', regardless of how many lives are lost as they repeat their schemes over and over again.

For Phase 1, at least, there was a LOT going on, because so much had to be established. I imagine it'll get easier from this point now that all this stuff is out of the way, so we can focus more on how all these different elements intertwine. Hell, we spent all that time in the beginning talking about CPPs and Meow, but she basically faded off and became irrelevant halfway through the story. SURELY all that stuff was more than just Ryukishi talking some sense into the people who ignored Umineko's message, and will come into play more in future phases, but as of right now there's a lot of elements like that where it feels like we don't know enough to really speculate on how important it's going to be to the story. Right now there are so many things going on that it's hard to know what to focus on - content-wise, it feels like we got as much as 3 arcs' worth of Higurashi and Umineko. Of course, if Ciconia really is only going to be 4 phases long, that makes sense...but it does make it a lot harder to figure out what we should be paying attention to when SO much has happened already. The last 20 minutes of the game alone was far more of a mindfuck than anything in Higurashi or Umineko.

All in all I am very much looking forward to Phase 2 (which has already been delayed from its expected release of next May, though I already predicted that'd happen...does that make this a 'prophecy'?), and I've enjoyed discussing it all in the 07th Expansion Central Discord, so I feel like I got my money's worth already. Time will tell how Ciconia stacks up to the obsessive experience that Umineko was for me, but for better or worse, I have faith in Ryukishi to make this story a Hell of a ride.

—————————————— Kingdom Come Deliverance (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Recommended (if the middle ages mysogyny doesn't put you off) ——————————————

I'd heard both good and bad things about KCD when it came out...people praised the attention to historical detail and realism, but complained about the plethora of bugs and performance issues (on PC anyway). I was a little surprised to see it offer a steep discount and free play weekend back in September, when the game only just came out in 2018, but I figured, why not give it a try since it's free? I ended up playing for almost 20 hours before the weekend ended, and found myself enjoying it more than I thought I would.

Coming right on the heels of my Ultimate Skyrim playthough, I was impressed by how much more enjoyable the RPG survival mechanics could be when a game was actually built with them IN MIND, rather than having to tack them on with mods. A lot of the core KCD features are similar to Requiem and UltSky - no auto-health regen, having to actually practice and train to get skilled using your weapons/armor, paying attention to your opponents in combat and not being able to win just by mashing attack, as well as having to keep yourself fed, rested, and so on. But since KCD was actually designed with all of these systems integrated, it felt a lot less clunky and tedious to manage them. I ended up being pretty sad that I didn't grab it during the sale before the free weekend ended and I found myself enjoying my UltSky playthrough a lot less after witnessing these kinds of 'hardcore' features done, well...better than Requiem does them.

The game went on sale again about 2 months later, and since it coincided with my birthday, I decided to go for it.

One thing I feel I've been getting more and more used to these days is the first-person perspective in games. It's always been something I've disliked compared to third person, and typically if a game gives me the choice I'll go with third every time. In crafting/survival games like ARK (which HAS third person but it kinda sucks), 7 Days to Die and even hearkening back to my Minecraft days of yore, first person was more tolerable and made sense because it's much easier to build things with a first person camera. It also makes sense for shooters because you get an unobstructed aim at your target - the same reason I'll usually switch into first for archery in Skyrim, even though I play everything else in third. But a full blown RPG in first, with no option to switch situationally, was still difficult for me to get used to. Once you understand the basics of how KCD's combat works and everything though, it's obvious why it wouldn't really WORK with a third person camera, so after a while it became second nature to me.

While I'm still not quite finished at the time of this review (just got out of the monestary and am wrapping up sidequests before getting locked into the final endgame story quests), I can say I've quite enjoyed the story so far. It's not exactly a groundbreaking premise - you start off in the Doomed RPG Hometown where you do your little tutorial missions and get a feel for how to play, then the bad guys storm through and slaughter everyone, including your parents, sparking the hero's quest for revenge. However, there's something about the characterization and the gravity of the situation (especially with Henry being a peasant and not a JRPG adventurer) still managed to suck me in. That scene near the beginning, when you're standing there on the castle ramparts in the rainy night, watching the lord of Talmberg try and deceive the enemy...and then explicitly disobey orders and flee back to Skalitz to bury your parents even though it's a foregone conclusion that it's a Very Bad Idea...there was something that just really gripped me and made me eager to find out what would happen next. Which, considering I was playing on a free weekend at this point, also worked really well from the standpoint of devs hooking you with a strong beginning enough to make you want to purchase the game.

Sure, with time, training, and enough money to buy some really good weapons and armor (or enough perseverance to win some in the weekly tournaments, like I did) you can turn Henry from a lowly blacksmith's son into an RPG God. BUT...it DOES take work to get there, and it feels believable as a result. You're handed a Really Nice Sword in the very beginning of the game but because you have no idea how to lose it you get your ass quickly handed to you, the sword stolen, and would be left for dead if not for the timely intervention of a neighbor. The thing is, though this event is of course scripted, it doesn't FEEL like the game is railroading me into purposefully losing a fight that I might have been able to win due to player skill...because at this point, Henry legitimately has no training!! No amount of savescumming (also made nearly impossible by the game's default save system, though I am using the unlimited save mod) or player cheesing could change the fact that a peasant who's never had to swing a real sword or fight for his life would get his shit kicked in by an actual trained warrior. Only after this event, when you have the opportunity to take lessons with Captain Bernard, can you actually learn proper (if basic, at first) sword techniques and work your way into becoming an actual man-at-arms.

That sense of actual growth and progression in Henry is a big part of what makes the experience fun, I think. You really do feel like you're a struggling nobody at the beginning, but as you work your way up in the world and become more respected by your peers and even the nobility, you start to feel like you earned it. You get to go from an unwashed peasant in dirty and torn-up clothes starting petty arguments with the local lord-to-be to a trusted and well-respected member of the local garrison, wearing your expensive and regularly-polished armor and listening to the people greet you accordingly. Does it have some of the power fantasy elements you'd expect from a zero-to-hero story? Maybe so, but they never felt like they were undeserved - all the respect my Henry got was due to his actions, and not just by virtue of being The Protagonist.

That said, there are some elements of the game that might not sit well with people. The game does take place in 1403 and its main selling point is its historical realism, and all that historical realism entails - but that doesn't mean the Medieval Misogyny is going to be tolerable for everyone playing it in 2019+1 and beyond. Females are generally cast in the roles you would expect of them during the time period and even the 'strong' female characters are still subservient to the men. That's how it was, and for a game that sells itself on its authenticity, it's a bit of a sticky thing to argue about. Likewise I've seen criticism about 'racism' simply because pretty much every character in the game is white...even though darker-skinned people would have been pretty rare to the area in that time period (possibly in Prague, but the game doesn't actually take you there, so that's a moot point). Still, while I don't think they're really fair arguments to make against the game for simply portraying things the way they were back then, it's still absolutely fair to say the game isn't for everybody and there's nothing wrong with people who might find the content offensive.

At the end of the day this is still a game where you are forced to play the role of a male character - this is not a create-your-own-hero game where you get to define who you are and what you look like and 100% of your character's backstory and personality. It's the story of Henry, and while you're given a lot of opportunities to play Henry as a respectable Knight or as an absolute Scoundrel as you please, it is still HENRY'S STORY - not yours. This is a game where there are achievements for having sex, and an achievement for remaining a virgin. You can use the bathhouses to have a good time and get yourself an 'alpha male' buff if you so choose (I've not once used them for anything but cleaning my clothes because I am staying loyal to Theresa). You'll bump into quests where you'll see things like a lord not wishing to purchase well-bred horses from a woman simply because she's a woman, or the very insinuation that you might want to help give a down-on-her-luck woman a job as a water carrier (physical work!!) absolutely ludicrous. All kinds of little things like that, which are in my opinion pretty minor in the grand scheme of misogyny in video games, but again...while I don't hold it against the game itself for its portrayal of the era, I also don't hold it against people who might be offended by these things to not play the game.

If you ARE willing to look past some occasionally uncomfortable 'historical accuracy', though, you'll find a very enjoyable RPG with largely likable characters and engaging (if not revolutionary) storytelling. The game mechanics are well-integrated and it feels less like I'm being forced to eat/drink/sleep/bathe and more like I'm willingly adopting a realistic schedule and means of planning my days. Once you master the combat system you can definitely feel like an unfuckable God, but all it takes is one extra enemy being alerted to your presence than you planned for, or a single failed block, to ruin your day and remind you that you are still a normal human being and not a supernatural video game war machine. If that kind of thing sounds less like a fun challenge and more like frustration to you, this is probably also not a game you will enjoy. Personally I really like it, and when I do get my shit kicked in it feels like it's my own fault for being too cocky and ill-prepared (great example: I never wear my helmet when I'm doing errands around town and talking to people because it seems rude as fuck but sometimes I forget to put it on when I travel and if I'm unlucky enough to run into a bandit ambush my head is now a very easy target). And that feels FAIR to me, unlike games where I fail because I didn't minmax enough or seek out some specific piece of OP gear that would allow me to cheese the situation instead of making use of my own skills and abilities.

I think it says a lot that this is one of the only games where I have considered doing a playthrough in Hardcore Mode, a mode that some games will include that is clearly designed for masochists who hate fun. But somehow, the idea of KCD in hardcore mode actually sounds the opposite to me, forcing me to REALLY pay attention to the gameplay systems I've largely become able to ignore by the lategame (I've literally had the Balanced Diet perk active for ingame weeks because it's so easy to keep my hunger between 80-90 just by eating from food pots). Whether I actually go through with it depends on how easily distracted I am (read: very) because I may just want to move on and play other games by the time I finish, but I can still see myself giving it another go someday and trying for those last elusive achievements.

In the end, I feel like KCD is one of those games, like Shadow of Mordor, where I'd love to see other RPGs take a page or two as reference. KCD's historical realism is one of the main things that sets it apart from your typical fantasy RPG, but I also think fantasy RPGs could benefit from those realistic elements (not just the need to eat/drink/sleep but also stuff like longer-lasting injuries, not being able to heal mid-combat, or people actually remembering and being pissed at you if you just robbed them blind the night before). But until that day comes, I'll settle for a KCD sequel.

—————————————— Divinity: Original Sin 2 (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Unfinished ——————————————

I shouldn't even be playing this, since I've not yet finished the first one (still plan to, someday...I think I was like 2/3 through where I left off), but I grabbed it a little while back in a sale and started playing it with a friend.

As of this writing we're only just about to get off the introductory island and presumably end the first major story arc, so it's not really enough for a proper rating. However, it feels more or less like the first game, with a little more polish. The gameplay is pretty much exactly the same, and the writing has that same level of not taking itself too seriously. Feels like the kind of sequel that's basically 'it's the same core game but with a new story to tell', which isn't a bad thing, since the original was already quite good.

One major difference is that the characters seem more interesting this time around. In the first game, aside from the main duo that were basically just your own blank slate characters, you only had four other choices for your remaining two party members. I picked the mage and the archer since my main duo were a rogue and warrior type and I didn't want role overlap, but while the mage had a pretty robust and interesting backstory I thought the archer was a bit dull by comparison...and apparently that's because she and the rogue NPC were only added to the game later, so they weren't quite as enjoyably fleshed out as the mage and the warrior (who I didn't take). And even then, their stories felt a bit more...background? Sure, their personal quests tied into yours and you'd unravel bits and pieces along the way to help them resolve their own problems, but it never felt terribly integrated into the adventure of my main duo.

This time around, all the characters on the cover art are possible traveling companions with their own in-depth stories...but what's more, you can also choose to play as any one of them (or go the same route as the first game and just be your own character without a premade backstory). For my game with my friend we chose to play as two of the default characters, and are trying hard to stick to roleplaying in line with their backgrounds (and, also, villainous scoundrels). The interesting thing is that when you go that route you occasionally get in-character dialogue options that correspond to your character's backstory, in addition to the usual options. So while you're on one hand roleplaying as the character however you see fit, you also have the chance to explore the background story the creators envisioned for a particular NPC at the same time.

Again, I'm not really far enough to judge things like the story (though I am already a bit sick of how much has revolved around the dude I killed in the first story arc of the first game, like a thousand in-universe years before this game), but overall it feels like pretty much the same game as the first, just...a sequel. And again, that's not a bad thing. It's also fun to be doing it this time around in co-op, since the first game was so very clearly intended to be played that way too, but I was going it solo and just controlling both of the main characters (which made the occasional chances for disagreements between them very silly). Basically, if you like the first game, you'll probably like the second, but if you were hoping for something a little bit different than the first, you'd be disappointed.

—————————————— Conan Exiles (Steam) FINAL VERDICT: Bretty Gud ——————————————

Once again, I've been pulled in by a free weekend.

I'd heard various things about Conan Exiles...praise, complaints, and a lot of jokes about dick physics. But I've also been vaguely interested in it for seeming like ARK, minus the dinosaurs, but with the kind of satisfying third-person combat mechanics I like. So when it had a free (4-day!) weekend just before the start of the Steam holiday sale, I thought, why not give it a try?

I'll tell you why not - because it's ARK, minus the dinosaurs, but with the kind of satisfying third-person combat mechanics I like. In other words, the perfect ingredients to get me addicted to yet another survival/building game.

Now, I know next to nothing about Conan lore, but I also knew next to nothing about LoTR and I still had a blast playing Shadow of Mordor, so I knew that sometimes not having an extensive background of the source material can be okay. Conan Exiles is apparently extremely faithful to the original stories, and there is actually a LOT of lore sprinkled throughout the game. It's not unlike ARK's explorer notes, except they're all in English so I can actually read and understand them (turns out it's more engaging to read lore about a game within the game itself than on a wiki - who knew!!). And despite being an open-world survival/building game, it's also apparently got a concrete storyline with a concrete ending, which is pretty unheard of in this genre, so that's kinda cool.

At the moment I've only been playing in singleplayer. For the duration of the free weekend I chose to play completely vanilla - I don't like to mod games until I know the basic mechanics (so I know what sorts of things I'd LIKE to mod), but I also didn't touch any of the multipliers or anything either. I found the defaults a lot more forgiving than ARK's, but definitely still grindy. Once I decided to buy I started installing a couple mods and bumped my multipliers a bit. By that time I already had my current base built (though I'm thinking of moving) so I started just flying around in admin mode and building other stuff, particularly with modded structures (the Egyptian-style building kit was a lot of fun to play with).

The building mechanics are basically the same as ARK's, but refined and generally feel smoother. The snap points can still be a bit finicky but things seem to go where I want them to a lot more often than with ARK, and I've had a LOT less problems with my ceilings. The fact that the base game includes triangle pieces and didn't need to buy out a very popular mod to include them is also a plus. There's a bit more variety in pieces, too, like several different styles of roofing - not to mention the wealth of decoration items in the base game. Because of that this game seems to have a strong appeal to roleplayers, but to me it strongly appeals to my childhood fascination with LEGO and building crazy structures that I would then furnish and decorate with my other small non-LEGO toys. With ARK, unless you're lucky enough to find a server with a bunch of eco's mods, decoration options are sparse, so I really do appreciate all the clutter items the base game gives me to play with (and of course there are also mods that add hundreds more).

Then comes the part where the game feels like a totally different animal from ARK - general exploration and combat. In ARK, the main gameplay loop is taming stronger and stronger dinosaurs to perform harvesting tasks for you and to fight other dinosaurs or players. You can station them around your base to keep it safe from intruders, or start breeding OP ones to take into the boss arenas. The whole appeal of the game is to tame and ride dinosaurs, so aside from your first hour or so trying to survive on foot that's basically what you'll be using for all your traveling and fighting needs.

Of course, one of the main gameplay loops in Conan Exiles is capturing NPCs and having them run your crafting stations and guard your base, not unlike raising your dinos, and you can even capture baby animals and raise them as companions. But while you can bring (one) thrall or animal follower along with you on journeys, for the most part you are alone in these harsh lands surviving by your own skills. The most recent update introduced horses, but the riding controls leave a lot to be desired at the moment so I've mostly just been walking across the land on foot...which is harsh, and makes you really think about what you need when you set off on a long journey from home (food, water, healing items, tools, weapons, stuff to repair your equipment with if it breaks...and all of that stuff weighs you down if you haven't buffed your encumbrance, so coming back with your arms full of loot can be tricky).

While it can be a bit of a pain when you're accustomed to mount-based traveling in games like ARK, it does also solve one of ARK's biggest problems IMO - once you get a flier, you will never want to use anything else, and you can just avoid 99% of the danger on the map by flying everywhere. It's a problem I've started going out of my way to circumvent, but in Conan Exiles it's the default state. Even if they flesh out and improve mounts more, I think it'd be a bit awkward compared to solo traveling because the map is designed in such a way that you'll have to climb a lot of places, and I think that makes it a bit refreshing compared to ARK's 'you can get almost everywhere better and more safely on a dino's back so why would you ever risk otherwise' gameplay.

There's also a lot of fighting, and in my experience mounted combat is almost never good in any game that attempts it - especially if said game (like Conan Exiles) has a robust system of combos and dodging/blocking for normal combat, but mounted combat basically has to boil down to wildly swinging your weapon while also trying to maneuver around and both HIT the enemy and also not get hit BY the enemy. Seriously, the only game that I've played that did mounted combat RIGHT was Assassin's Creed Origins, because there were also mounted enemies everywhere, the horse was very easy to maneuver, and you got different weapon animations on horseback so you didn't have to deal with weird hitbox issues while trying to flail your weapon around blindly like an idiot. Also your horse actually did trample damage instead of ghosting through anything that crossed its hooves. Rant aside, I feel like it's the kind of game that was so thoroughly designed WITHOUT mounts in mind that having mounts would only make it feel weird, and running barefoot across the sand is an inherent part of the experience.

What I was going to say before I went off on a tangent was that combat in ARK - because you rely so heavily on your mounts - basically boils down to 'one button to chomp, one button to stomp'. If you're lucky the dino may even have a THIRD type of chomp/stomp/tail whip. It's very much a mash-attack-to-win affair where the stats of your creature matter more than your actual skill, which, to be fair, it's a game where breeding creatures with ideal stats IS part of the appeal so that's fine. But it can get a little boring to just go around on a rex and kill anything with a few chomps, where your only other 'ability' is a roar that's basically just cosmetic and has no special function.

Conan Exiles' combat is more of an actual feature of the game than a simple consequence of 'needing' to be able to hunt and kill things for the sake of survival and resource gathering. It's all about mixing up your light and heavy combos, of which different weapons have different types and also attack speeds. Different weapons may also have different abilities, like inflicting bleeding damage or slowing your enemy down. Which weapon you choose can come down to personal preference or experience, or it could be situational depending on where you're going and what you're planning to fight. For the first half of my playtime I basically stuck to dual-wielding daggers (dat bleed damage) but reached a point where I wanted something one-handed so I could use a shield and block arrows, or hold a torch when delving into caves and other dark places and still see what was attacking me. So I picked up an axe off a dead enemy and, despite being a lower tier than my steel daggers, was doing WAY more damage. Suddenly I felt like a God, mowing down an entire pirate ship full of enemies effortlessly when before I'd have to dodge out of the way long enough to eat some food and recover my health a bit while the bleeding damage slowly ticked away at them. From what I've read online, two-handed swords or pikes are 'the best' weapons, but I'm quite happy with my axe and my shield, and it makes me feel very fittingly barbarian-y as I hack my enemies to pieces, see them driven before me, and yadda yadda that one famous Conan quote.

As far as story progression and whatnot goes, I've only done the first dungeon and basically I'm just running around capturing thralls, pets, and looking for cool locations to build stuff. While I do think it's neat that the game has an actual 'progression' and a conclusive ending, I'm not too worried about it because that's not the reason I (or assumedly most people) play games like this. I'll probably get to it eventually...then again, I had more than 1000 hours in ARK before I fought a boss for the first time, so we'll see. I'm already starting to get a bit bored with singleplayer since I've started abusing my admin powers a bit too much, so I'd like to look for a decent server soon that's got some of the mods I like, but also won't force me into roleplaying with strangers. Ideally I'd love to be able to play with friends, but I don't know if any of my ARK friends would like it because it lacks the dinosaur appeal...so I might just have to venture off into the world by myself and...ugh. Talk to people, I guess.

Either way I am having fun, and I can see myself probably coming back to it when I just wanna chill out and BUILD something, much like I do in ARK.

[criesblood]

; I’ve been working on some sub-verses and some AU verses for Mary, you can find them HERE ! Anyone is free to request them when you like a starter call or send me a meme, or plot with me! ooor honestly just toss them at me if you write me a starter! They include verses for Harry Potter, historical/legendary/epic settings, The Vampire Diaries/The Originals, The Hundred, Bates Motel, a college verse, The Following and a Heroes/Marvel/DC/etc verse. She is still Bloody Mary, the spirit, in all of them, but there are twists. I still want to have an OUAT verse, maybe a pirate verse and a few others, but these will come later.

The verses are under the cut for my own reference but if you wanna check them out you should go HERE because I have more pretty icons there and you should appreciate them haha!

v; slithering through mirrors (Hogwarts)

Mary Worthington was a 5th year Slytherin student at Hogwarts, but something had changed by the time 6th year started. Her friends and other students could tell something was off-- Mary was skipping a lot of classes and sometimes her eyes would spontaneously bleed. The professors didn’t acknowledge it or brushed it off, but they added a mysterious mirror to the Slytherin girls’ dormitory; they knew what happened. Mary kept it a secret from everybody else but the truth was she was dead now. Murdered during the summer between 5th and 6th year, her restless, vengeful spirit attached itself to a mirror. The magical energy surrounding Hogwarts helps her stay corporeal and out of the mirror (though she can still be summoned too), and the legend of Bloody Mary has yet to spread. Who killed her, how she died and the mythology behind the mirror, the summoning, the killing etc are exactly like in Mary’s main verse, but she is a born witch here; no demonic deals needed. Also note she is eternally sixteen in this verse, the only verse where she is underage.

v; the legend of the dead witch (historical) 

Not a fandom-specific verse but geared toward anything that as a mythological, legendary, epic, historical or fairytale vibe. Mary Worthington was a well known powerful witch, who traveled between kingdoms and used her abilities to help others, often staying in kingly courts or powerful covens. She gained her magic not through a demonic deal but through a deal with one of the Fae, a member of the Seelie Court (the fae’s identity is thread-dependent!), who favored Mary due to her open heart and closeness with nature. Her powers are mostly relating to working with the elements, healing, glamours and of course using herbs, but can wander into darker territories if necessary. Her fame granted her many admirers but not all were convinced; some feared and were threatened by anyone who possessed magic. It was one such man who wounded her with iron (a weakness inherited from her Fae patron) and murdered her while her magic was bound. He gouged out her eyes and she tried to write a blood spell on the mirror, but couldn’t finish it before succumbing to her injuries. Perhaps it was a combination of the Fae folk watching over her, her half-done ritual on the mirror and the anger and trauma of the murder that brought her back to life, as the vengeful ghost of Bloody Mary (the summoning/killing rules are the same as in her main verse!). But instead of fading into being thought of as a myth, she made sure everyone knew she was still around, murdering those that kept murderous secrets and even innocents if they didn’t summon her correctly. She maintained her presence on the courts and covens, still trying to use her powers for good whenever she could, and her fame only grew.

v; blood sacrifices (TVD/TO)

When a witch dies with vampire blood in her system, she loses her magic and ceases being a witch; everyone knows that. But what happens if a soul that is to become a restless, vengeful spirit has vampire blood inside her upon her death? Something weird, and Bloody Mary is proof of it. Her backstory in this verse is the same as her main verse, up until the murder and attempt to write the killer’s name on a mirror. She died and was brought back to life because of the vampire blood in her system, given to her by a friend who knew a killer was after her. Mary didn’t want to live like that, so she refused to feed and died again, peacefully. That should’ve been the end, but the anger and trauma of the murder and the injustice that the murderer was never caught brought her back as the vengeful spirit known as Bloody Mary, same as the main verse. The difference is, something of the vampiric blood still affected her: she grew fangs and could sustain herself by drinking blood. Unlike a vampire, she doesn’t need to feed (she is still a ghost, after all), but whenever she’s out of the mirror, in corporeal form, she can increase the length of time she’s free by consuming the vital life energy contained in blood. Hearing that Mystic Falls and New Orleans are hotbeds of supernatural activity, she traveled to those locations in search of something that could free her from mirrors and end the curse of the bloody Mary once and for all. [Please note that her strengths and weaknesses remain that of a ghost, not a vampire. Her eyes flash red and fangs grow when she feeds and that’s about all the vampiric you get from her!]

v; space pocket mirror (The 100)

Mary Worthington was 21 when she lived on the Ark. There was a little girl she cared for like she was her own sister, and the girl got sick. Instead of a demonic deal for witchy powers like on her main verse, in this verse Mary’s solution was much more mundane. She stole antibiotics and saved the girl, but she got caught. Arrested, and floated. Her mother watched, and cried, clutching a pocket mirror Mary had given her as a way to remain close to her family in the afterlife. The last thing Mary saw as she drifted into space was this blinding light that hurt her eyes, and then she was dead. And then she was back--- kind of, thanks to the anger over her death sentence being unfair, and seeing her mother’s grief. Mary’s spirit was stuck inside the mirror now, bloody tears coming from her eyes, the only way to free her was with a surge of energy...which she didn’t know about. When The 100 were sent down to Earth, someone took the mirror too, unknowingly bringing Bloody Mary along for the ride and separating her from her family again. The violence freed her from her prison (the mirror/summoning rules are the same as her main verse) and a girl that lived her whole life in space has to learn to adapt to living on a nearly empty Earth, among nature and enemies.

v; the eyes are the windows to the soul (The Following)

I’ve yet to come across any muses from TF, but a girl can hope (this verse works well with any police investigation type of universe, anyway!) With Mary’s canon death involving her eyes being gouged out, and Joe Carroll’s canon MO being exactly that, the verse kind of wrote itself. Mary was a modern day witch, pursuing an English degree at Winslow University, Virginia, right around the time the Virginia Campus Murders started . Nobody suspected the rather well-liked (and Edgar Allan Poe obsessed, thus equating beauty with death) literature professor, Joe Carroll, of being a serial killer. Unfortunately for Mary, she fit his victim profile to a T, and he killed her. Drawing her last breaths, she wrote the letter J on a mirror, attempting to write the name of the killer, but she died before finishing. Several other female students would still be murdered before FBI agent Ryan Hardy apprehended Joe. The traumatic death and the anger at the injustice kept Mary’s spirit trapped in mirrors, and from that point on everything is the same as her main verse, with one addition: when the cult of Joe emerged she did her best to work with the police to find them, but only very few people within the task force knew one of Joe’s victims had returned as a ghost.

v; peering through a broken mirror (Bates Motel)

A sub-verse that is part of her main verse, started as a thing between me and ofwrittenschemes’ Norman but open to anyone that wants to interact within this setting! Everything is the same as the main verse up until two girls who are staying at the Bates Motel decide to play the Bloody Mary game, summoning Mary who has no choice but to kill them. Just as the now-corporeal ghost stepped out of the mirror, motel manager Norman came into the room and Mary had to quickly pretend that she was a victim too, the only survivor of a paranormal attack. Little does she know that Norman is hiding something too. Now Mary is staying in White Pine Bay, a small town with a history of crime, conspiracies and mob wars, and the pair have some crimes to cover up, some crimes to try and solve, and they have to decide whether to trust each other with their secrets or not. At least until Mary’s time is up and she’s swept back into the mirror.

v; haunted sorority house (college)

Also a sub-verse that is part of her main verse, meaning everything is the same up until she is summoned by some college boys playing the Bloody Mary game. They die, the energy lets her loose on campus, where curiosity and a desire to live a normal life make her decide to stay and blend in, pretending to be a student with an undeclared major. She even manages to rush a sorority, all while keeping her ghostly identity a secret from most.

v; vengeful vigilante (Heroes/DC/Marvel)

Also a sub-verse that is part of her main verse, meaning everything is the same up until the rise of superheroes and supervillains. The wave of vigilante crime fighting resonates with Mary, who decides to put her supernatural skills to good use whenever she’s out of the mirror and learns how to physically fight too. She finds those guilty of murder and gets them arrested or, sometimes, killed. Whenever she’s out crime fighting she wears black, ties her hair up and often times she’s crying blood; Mary doesn’t bother with a mask because she can’t be caught or found anyway--- she lives in mirrors and is a spirit that died centuries ago. She goes by Blood Tears, but many people refer to her as Bloody Mary because she ‘reminds them of the urban legend’, not realizing she is, in fact, the urban legend. They usually assume she’s some kind of metahuman/evo/mutant that can travel through mirrors and/or control blood. She’s not a hero, she’s an antihero who is not above murder and petty crimes if they help her stop other killers.

[elizabethemerald]

Video Date for Toby, Claire and Jim

Long distance relationships can be hard, but there’s nothing cuter than a video date with your two boyfriends! Especially after a long week of hiking in the wilderness with a bunch of trolls!

The motel smelled a little musty, like it hadn't been cleaned properly in to long, but compared to the caves, mines and old barns they had been staying in for the past week it was heaven. Not to mention the complete lack of troll smell.

Claire had showered as soon as she got the keys to room. She only barely remembered to open the back window so Jim could climb in. If the hotel manager wondered why a 16 year old was renting a room for just the day he didn't mention it after her credit card cleared.

When she was finished washing a week's worth of grime off she emerged in a towel. She was unsurprised to see Jim lounging on the bed in a loose sweat suit. They smiled at each other for just a second, before she nodded towards the bathroom.

"Showers all yours!"

"Yes!" Jim hopped off the bed and bounded into the bathroom. She smiled at the door for a second. Jim had always been clean for a boy and his transformation seemed to increased that. He would bathe in every stream and trickle they came across on their journey.

Finally she pulled her thoughts away from her boyfriend and focused on the room. First she let her mind expand as she magically checked the room. Nothing in the room alerted her senses. It was clear, no spying devices, magical or mundane. She mentally reprimanded herself, she needed to remember to check for cameras before Jim entered the room.

It was Ms. Nomura who had found the first camera. The cheap motels they stayed at on occasion unfortunately had some sleazy clientele. Nomura was well experienced with that sort of sleaze and taught them what to look out for. Fortunately that first camera had been recording, not broadcasting. Since then Claire had started checking every room they stayed in.

Once she sure that she could do magic unobserved she let some small waves of purple fire flow from her fingertips. The fire filled the room, but wasn't powerful enough to burn the furnishings. It did kill any mites or bugs or germs that might be in the mattress. Jim said he didn't really notice the bugs with his stone skin but Claire definitely did.

Once she was done and the waves of purple fire retreated back to her hands the room actually smelled clean. She smiled and felt comfortable enough to get dressed into her pajamas. She stretched for a second then got back to work.

She tightly closed the heavy curtains. Day was breaking outside and she didn't want Jim to be hurt by a stray sunbeam. Next she got out her laptop and plugged it in. She turned it on even though she knew Toby wouldn't be awake for a little while yet.

Once that was done she set to cleaning and repairing her equipment. Jim had armor that was formed of Daylight, completely clean each time he summoned it. Claire wasn't so lucky. She didn't hike in her full armor any more, yet every piece seemed to be covered in muck. Plus she had her regular camping gear to maintain. Thank God her father had been so prepared when he had helped her pack.

Some things she cleaned and repaired with her magic. Some things needed elbow grease to be cleaned or a more fine touch to repair. She laughed quietly to herself while she worked. She was learning a whole host of skills she hadn't expected to. Claire took her time finishing her tasks. Jim could be in the shower for hours if he wanted. As long as the hot water lasted he would stay in.

Claire had just finished the last of her work and settled on the bed with the computer on her lap when Jim finally emerged from the bathroom. A massive cloud of steam poured into the room as he opened the door. She bit her lip and looked up at the ceiling as he stood there running a hand through his mane. He was wearing just a pair of loose fitting sweats that sagged down his hips. She knew she was blushing like mad. Jim looked like a statue of an old greek hero, the water running in rivulets down his abs, his horns shining in the dim light of the motel room.

Before she could say anything Jim ended the moment by shaking himself like a dog. She shrieked and covered her laptop as water sprayed everywhere.

“Jim!” She cried. “Do you have any idea how hard it would be for me to get another laptop out here on the road?”

He looked guilty for a short moment then smiled apologetically. “My hair is so thick it never dries if I don’t get the water out.”

She sighed at his little puppy dog look, he was still cute, even as a half troll. “Come here. And careful with your horns!”

Jim grabbed his pillow from his bag and carefully laid down on the bed next to her. She had reinforced the pillow with her magic so he would stop tearing them with his horns. Once he was comfortable she ran her hand over his chest. More purple flames poured from her hand. Again it wasn’t hot enough to burn him, or even feel uncomfortable but it was enough to quickly dry his hair. It looked almost comically poofy now.

“Why don’t you do that with your hair?” He gestured to the wet patch on her pillow.

“Are you kidding me? My hair would be impossibly frizzy if I tried that.” She smiled and ran her hands through his hair. It was much thicker now after his transformation. Sometimes he was self conscious about his hair, but this was one change she didn’t mind. He had a soft rumble in his chest as she continued combing his hair with her fingers.

“Any word from Toby yet?” He asked.

“Not yet but it’s Saturday and only eight back in Arcadia. He might be sleeping in.”

While they waited Claire logged into her bank account. The credit card she had used had actually been Blinky’s idea. Who could have guessed that traveling across the entire country on foot would have been expensive? The card had been a hassle to set up and get but it was completely worth the effort. Her parents had the login info and so did Jim’s mom, and Toby’s Nana, and Mr. Strickler and a few of the other teachers from their high school. Any of them could pay off the balance so the burden didn’t fall on any one person. Then she could buy clothes, or food or this hotel room without having to worry.

The only remaining balance was the hotel room. Someone had paid the balance from the previous week already. She was so thankful Blinky had thought to do this.

Suddenly an icon flashed on the desktop. Jim sat up straight when he saw it. Claire quickly closed out of everything else, then answered the call. After a few seconds of struggle Toby’s smiling face appeared. Claire and Jim crowded together to make sure they were both on camera.

"How's the picture coming through?" Toby asked. "That new kid, Krel, one of the weirdo geniuses, gave me this thing that helps boost the signal."

"You're coming through perfectly Tobes!" Jim said. Claire was using a touch of her magic to boost the signal on their end and whatever Toby was using on his was working as well.

"TP, you look tired! Are you getting enough sleep?" Claire asked him.

"Oh you two know what trollhunting is like. Never a moment's rest." He said waving away their concern. "What about you two? Claire is that a new cut on your cheek? And Jim there's one on your chest as well!"

Jim growled, a terrifying sound in the confined space. It must have sounded awful to Toby considering the way he recoiled from his computer. Claire's hand rose unconsciously to her cheek. It was little more than a cut now. She doubted it would scar, her magic healing was pretty amazing.

Jim's would scar though. His body was so strange. It didn't respond to Claire's healing magic and the molten metal the trolls used for their wounds often seemed to make things worse. Fortunately while he wore his armor his body healed on his own but he still bore scars. Some going as far back to when he first faced Bular.

"If the wizard would only listen to me!" Claire flinched as he spoke. His claws unsheathed and his fangs were bared. Across the room the amulet glowed, its gears whirring to life. She quickly put a hand on his arm.

"Babe we talked about this! We just want a relaxing date with our boyfriend, remember?" He took some deep breathes through his nose his eyes clamped shut. Claire turned back to the screen. "I'll call you later Toby and explain, but can we make this be a fun date just the three of us?"

"Of-of course!" He stuttered out, then immediately fell silent. Claire struggled for something to say as well. Jim was still focusing on reigning in his anger.

"Where's Darci? I thought she said she wanted to join in on these calls now." She finally said.

"She's on a date with Mary and Shannon. You two might not know this but Mary came out as a lesbian! Apparently all the guys she said she was seeing were to trick her parents."

"Oh good for them!" Claire noticed that Jim's ears flicked as he listened to them talk. His breathing was returning to normal. But the amulet was still flashing across the room. "That sounds so fun. I'll have to call Mary later and get all the details!"

"Yeah I don't even know all the details. Those two have been hanging out with Eli, Steve and those two new kids. Playing some kind of nerd game."

"Toby you are a nerd. Also at some point you can't keep calling them the new kids!"

"Listen Eli told me about the game, it's way more nerdy than even I can stand. And they will be the new kids until any newer kids come along."

Jim had finally relaxed enough for the amulet to quiet. Now he was following the conversation with interest.

"So Darci is on a date with Mary," he said. "Mary is dating Shannon. What about you, Tobes?" Toby only looked confused so Jim clarified. "Have you gone on any other dates with anyone else?"

Toby's bafflement only grew. "Why would I be going on any dates with anyone else? I go out with Darci as often as I can and I have these video dates with you two. Who else would I go on dates with?"

"Well there's always Eli?" Claire suggested.

"Or you could find out if Steve is bi? Or maybe Krel? Or some of the girls in class?" Jim said.  

Toby just laughed at that. "Why would I want to date them? I'm already dating everyone I've ever loved!"

"That's so sweet Tobes!" Jim smiled warmly at the camera. Claire could see Toby was blushing a little.

"What about you two?" He asked. "Any, uh, cute trolls?"

Claire slapped her hand on the camera while she gagged and retched dramatically.

"Age difference Toby! All of the trolls are centuries older than we are. Gross!"

“What about Ms. Nomura?” Toby wheezed in between laughs. “You said she was good looking,  right Jim?”

Jim laughed at that. “One she’s just as old as the other trolls, and Two I’m pretty sure she would stab me for even thinking about it!”

“Besides she’s definitely gay.” Claire said dismissively.

“Didn’t her and Draal have a thing?” Toby asked.

“I haven’t asked her and value my life too much to ever try. But if you had heard the way she talks about Barbara you’d know she was gay.”

“Wait, what?!” Jim shouted. “Why does every changeling who tried to kill me want to date my mom?”

“I don’t think date is quite what she had in mind.” Claire knew she had a slight blush. The pink changeling had been explicit in her thoughts about Jim’s mom. Jim clamped his hands over his long ears.

“No details no details!” He shouted. Toby was laughing so hard he was almost rolling off his bed. He kept slipping out of frame as he laughed. Claire couldn’t help but laugh as well. Even though she wasn’t saying anything Jim was humming loudly to himself with his hands still over his ears. Her smile turned fond as she stared at him. Here he was, shirtless, hair poofing out, covering his ears and singing off key. He was so handsome.

“Are you two done talking about my mom’s love life?” Jim asked, finally taking his hands off his ears. Claire was about to keep ribbing him, but Toby interrupted.

“Oh we are done messing with you Jim!” Then he gave a wicked smile. “It’s Claire’s turn!”

“Go ahead and take your best shot!” She said, her voice ringing with confidence. “Neither of you have anything on me!”

Jim seemed to agree with her if his face was any indication. He looked like he was trying to think of anything to sass her with. To her surprise Toby looked as confident as she felt. His smile widened at her look.

“Is that so Fair Clare?” He steepled his fingers like he was super villain in a movie. Claire felt her smile slip a little. “Jim my love? Would you mind flexing for me?”

Jim seemed confused but didn’t have any problems with showing off. Claire tried not to look, but her eyes betrayed her. Her blush crept higher up her cheeks. Toby started talking like a narrator.

“Is it his muscles that so attract the young lady’s eyes to her beloved’s form? Or is it his stone skin? His mighty horns and long claws? His eyes that glow or his fangs that rend?”

Claire knew she was blushing scarlet. Jim saw and realized what Toby was saying. He stopped posing for a second. Then ran his hands through his mane, allowing his talons to come unsheathed as he did so. He leaned close to her, she felt the air move as he took in her scent, saw his eyes start to glow. She shivered as he nuzzled her neck, one of his tusks caressing her skin. She felt a spark of her magic jump between her and Jim. A spark that Jim felt and Toby saw.

Claire shrieked and covered her face with her hands before pulling her head mostly into her shirt. “You two are awful I can’t believe you!”

“Maybe I should ask Merlin for a troll form of my own!” Toby said. “I could get a big set of curly horns. Even bigger than Jim’s horns. And I could have orange eyes that glow!”

Jim took over the narrative. “Oh Toby once you have a troll form you and I can spar!” He leaned over to Claire as she kept hiding her face. “Could you imagine the two of us wrestling? We wouldn’t want to ruin our clothes so we could wrestle in just some sweatpants. Our muscles straining against each other.”

A static charge built up in the room making her hair stand on end. Claire pulled her face out of her shirt enough to see Toby open his mouth to continue ribbing her and see him stopped by a hand motion from Jim. She fought to control her magic and pulled her head the rest of the way out of her shirt.

“You two are just rude! I love my boyfriends! Is that such a crime?” Her cheeks were still burning, but her magic calmed down enough that her hair returned to its normal state.

They all laughed loud and long together. Claire and Jim laid back and relaxed, enjoying the friendly atmosphere with the people they loved most. Eventually Jim fell asleep while Claire and Toby talked. She swore he only slept when they were all together on these video dates.

The conversation lagged as Claire started to doze off as well. Finally Toby bid her farewell. Jim roused for a few minutes to say goodbye, and to tell Toby he loved him, before quickly falling right back asleep. When Toby was gone, Claire shut down her computer and let her eyes fall shut, listening to the breathing of her one of her boyfriends. She smiled. Boyfriends. This is exactly what she needed.

[gems-in-the-city]

“Ladies and Gentleman, Boys and Girls and Gems of all cuts and creeds, it’s showtime!”

“Please put your hands together for the musical stylings of ‘Tanzanite And The Runners!’”

Gem: Tanzanite Pronouns: He/Him Weapon: Long double edged sword Occupation: Radio DJ/Session Musician/Leader of the band ‘Tanzanite And The Runners’ Band Position: Leader, Lead Vocalist, Songwriter, Various instruments (Acoustic Guitar, Saxophone, Pianist mostly) Personality: Calm, Cool, Charming and Charismatic, Sees the good in most folks

Skillset: Sword Proficiency, Photokinesis, Musicality Unique Abilities: Instant shapeshifting, Interdimensional Storage, Superior Adaptation

Icon Faceclaim: Ky Kiske (Guilty Gear)

Originally an agent of Blue Diamond, Tanzanite acted as a spy, worming his way into rebel camps only to turn on any Gem siding with Rose Quartz by slicing into them with his trusted blade, and shattering Gems to ensure her followers shrunk in size.

He was doing his Diamond well, and Rose’s army could have completely fallen, had he not felt the weight of his actions.

On the way to his next target, Tanzanite was struck with grief. He had been doing his job well, but at what cost? What was even the point of the Diamond’s galaxy-wide strangle hold on planets?

After literally falling into a hole on one rainy night, he vowed that he’d never fight for the Diamond Authority again, instead offering his hand to very the cause that he had been eliminating.

However, he vowed to never raise his sword, even for the Crystal Gems. Instead, he’d lend his support via a new vice in his life: Music, essentially becoming a bard.

Not to long after his change of metaphoric heart, he’d meet with more Crystal Gems that would welcome him into their corps. Gems that he would stay with for the rest of his life like a family.

---

Gem: Chrysoprase Pronouns: She/Her Weapon: Bow and Arrow Occupation: Archery Instructor, Band Member Band Position: Horn Instruments, Pianist, Strings Personality: Level headed, determined, a little smarmy

Skillset: Bow Proficiency, Photokinesis, Energy Projection, Musicality, Gem-tech Interfacing Unique Abilities: Psychokinesis, Terrain Manipulation

Icon Faceclaim: Elisabeth Blanctorche (KOF)

Gem: (Green) Pearl Pronouns: She/Her Weapon: Giant Fan Occupation: Librarian, Band Member Band Position: Various, uses Self-Duplication clones to fill in gaps for various instruments, manager Personality: Astute, Poised, Hardworking, Patient, has a tendency to be sarcastic at times

Skillset: Same abilities as an average Pearl, Musicality Unique Abilities: Most of an average Pearl (Holographic Projection, Self-Duplication, etc.), Wind Manipulation

Icon Faceclaim: Pearl (S*U)

Gem: Bismuth Pronouns: He/Him Weapon: N/A, read below Occupation: Radio DJ/Session Musician, Band Member Band Position: Pianist, Drums Personality: Smart, precise, well read, stern but fair

Skillset: Same abilities as an average Bismuth (Shapeshifting Weapons, Thermal Resistance, etc.), Musicality Unique Abilities: Same abilities as an average Bismuth (Skilled Craftsmanship, Superhuman Strength)

Icon Faceclaim: Bismuth (S*U)

A rouge space captain, her Pearl and a blacksmith. I’m sure there’s a joke here, but I’ve got nothing!

Anyhow, this ragtag group cut split from the Empire after being forced to  patrol planets that the Empire had already swept through.

Feeling her talents were being put to waste, Chrysoprase decided that she’d align with the rebels, just to get back at the Empire for more or less making her and her entire fleet of warriors janitors.

Although she faced some push back from her Pearl and fleet Bismuth, they eventually saw things from her point of view. Plus her turning to the Crystal Gems proved to be fruitful as the number of Gems under Rose Quartz rose tremendously, no thanks to that Spy assassin.

Ironically enough on a trip to Earth, Tanzanite just so happened to run into the green rogue and crew. The crew heard of Tanzanite’s plight and welcomed him to the Crystal Gems with open arms.

Even as the years went by and Gems came and went, these four would always stick together through thick and thin.

However, three more Gems would prove to stick around in the coming years.

---

Gem: Fire Agate Pronouns: He/Him Weapon: Dual Tonfa Occupation: Construction, Band Member Band Position: Backing Vocals, Electric Guitar/Bass Personality: LOUD, BRASH, CRUDE, ANGRY, A REAL ASSHOLE AND PROUD OF IT!!

Skillset: Tonfa Proficiency, Musicality, Pinpoint Accuracy, Hand To Hand Combat Proficiency  Unique Abilities: Superhuman Strength, Pyrokinesis, Thermal/Heat Resistance, Sound Manipulation

Icon Faceclaim: Yashiro Nanakase (KOF)

A captain sent to exile after over stepping his authority, Fire was left to blaze alone on a planet full of monsters far on the other edge of the galaxy.

For years his resentment towards the Diamond Authority grew as did his monster kill-count. There was nothing he wanted to do more than to shatter the Gem of each Diamond so he could burn their shards into ashes in the palm of his fiery hands.

He was found by Tanzanite and crew by pure chance, noticing a huge pillar of flame erupting from a planetoid far off in the galaxy. Upon arriving to the planet’s surface, Fire heard of their affiliation towards the Crystal Gems and wanted in immediately.

“I’ll join any cause you want, just as long as I get to smash those dumb rocks~!!!”

While most of the team were weary to his extreme levels of violence, Tanzanite found him to be a valuable member to the team, appreciating his literal fiery spirit.

---

Gem: Lapis Lazuli Pronouns: He/Him Weapon: Water Pot (Generates water for him to control) Occupation: Various odd jobs, Band Member Band Position: Backing Vocals, Acoustic Guitar, banjo Personality: Quite, easy-going, relaxed, go with the flow kind of Gem

Skillset: Same as an average Lapis Lazuli (Enhanced Durability, Strength) Unique Abilities: Same as an average Lapis Lazuli (Hydrokinesis, Water Generation, etc.)

Icon Faceclaim: Syo Kirishima/Kyo Kusanagi (KOF)

Counting acting Fire’s blazing personality is the lazy river rider mentality of Lapis Lazuli.

An easy-going Gem swept up in the tides of war, Lapis was to be exiled to the same planet as Fire Agate, but managed to hi-jack an escape pod with his water skills.

Landing in the mountains of South Korea, he lived a quiet life of living off the land in a little lean-to he built all himself. It wasn’t an exciting life, but it was a good life for him.

Of course he eventually grew bored of it and wanted some more action in his life. Luckily Tanzanite and his crew found him and, well, you can guess what happened next.

---

Gem: (Black) Spinel Pronouns: She/Her Weapon: N/A Occupation: No real job, but they tend to work with Fire Agate every now and then Band Position: Tambourine, Bongos, Piano Personality: Happy-Go-Lucky, always ready to play, but can get shy around new people

Skillset: Same as an average Spinel Unique Abilities: Same as an average Spinel

Icon Faceclaim: Spinel (S*U)

And rounding out this whacky family of space rocks is this little black and white ragamuffin!

A mental casualty thanks to the war, Spinel was the last of his rebel group, left alone and afraid to leave a cave they hid in while their rebel camp was attacked by the Diamond Authority.

Can you guess what happened next? You guessed it! Tanzanite and crew found Spinel and welcomed them into their group.

They were hesitant at first, but with Tender Loving Care, the team were able to put the spring back into Spinel’s squeaky steps! Although they’re still shy around new folks, but then again who isn’t?

---

For years the team would be on the run, moving from place to place, lending their hands whenever possible.

And then the day came: The Diamond Authority ceased their galaxy wide conquest. The time for peace was at hand.

Three years later, Tanzanite and crew have settled down in Empire City, getting by however they can, from working odd jobs to performing in their band ‘Tanzanite And The Runners’.

It’s not always easy, but together, they’ll make it through.

“And that’s our story~ I know, you didn’t come here to hear us wax lyrical about our lives...Nah, you came for the music~”

“So enough dawdling, let’s get this show on the road! 1, 2, 3!”

[karazor--el]

Supergirl's Katie McGrath Reacts to Eve's Betrayal, Explains Why the Latest Alex/Kara Twist Is 'Gratifying' for Lena

If you thought Lena Luthor had trust issues before, just wait until you see how she recovers — or doesn’t — from the shock of learning that her loyal assistant has been anything but. Sunday’s episode of Supergirl, appropriately titled “All About Eve,” finds Lena teaming up with Alex and the Girl of Steel to investigate Ms. Teschmacher’s insidious connection to Lex.

“I missed working with Melissa [Benoist] and Chyler [Leigh],” Katie McGrath tells TVLine. “I missed the power you feel from having these very strong — yet slightly opposing — women coming together, putting everything aside to solve the problem at hand. They’ve all got very different strengths and skills, and it’s been a while since you’ve seen them all working together.”

Of course, the complicated (and ever-changing) relationships between the three characters made their scenes together “a bit confusing,” McGrath admits. “It’s like, ‘I know Kara is Supergirl, but Lena doesn’t know that. And now poor Chyler, on top of everything, has to add in, ‘Oh, I’ve lost my memory, so I also don’t know she is.’ All three of us just stood around trying to figure everything out.”

But McGrath isn’t complaining. In fact, she finds it “gratifying” that Alex has temporarily had her memory swiped. “I always get asked, ‘Lena’s so smart. How does she not know Kara is Supergirl?’ So now I get to say, ‘Look, if her sister can’t tell the difference, I think you should let up on poor Lena.'”

Below, McGrath discusses the many twists her character’s journey has taken as of late, including what the future may hold for Lena and James…

TVLINE | Let’s start with Eve. What was your reaction when you learned about her betrayal?

I was so unbelievably excited, because I love Andrea [Brooks]. She’s a spark of joy in my life and on set, and I was so completely gratified to see that they were taking her character and making it something integral. She’s such a huge part of the comics. You don’t really think about Lex without thinking about Teschmacher. She’s such an icon, and she so perfectly fit into the Supergirl story of strong, intelligent women. … If you think about it, they’ve been playing the long con for two years. I was like, “Man, you’ve really been setting this up for a while.” And Andrea plays it so wonderfully, so wide-eyed and innocent. When she turns, it’s heartbreaking, but so compelling.

TVLINE | It’s like Eve and Andrea have been playing the long con.

[Laughs] I swear to you, it’s making me question my friendship to her.

TVLINE | I imagine this will be a huge blow to Lena’s sense of security.

Oh, it’s massive. Lena has very deep-seated insecurities, which have to do with her trust issues. It takes her a long time to let her guard down and to let someone in, so to find out that someone she trusted so completely — in a way she’s never trusted anyone — is not only untrustworthy, but has been working with the one person who destroyed Lena in the past … I don’t think you’ve really seen the effects of what this has done to Lena as a human.

TVLINE | Is it bad that I’m excited to watch her fall apart?

You know, she’s always so composed and capable. Sometimes we forget that she’s one of the few human characters on the show. She doesn’t have special powers. She and Alex are the everywoman. Lena’s usually so smart and on top of things, you almost see her as a super, but to see her so frail will be very interesting. It’s going to be very dramatic to watch.

TVLINE | I’m also excited for the big Luthor family reunion we’ve been promised.

I haven’t had a scene with everyone together yet, but I will say that there is never a moment where I see Brenda’s name on a call sheet and don’t squeal with joy. She is the most elegant, most wonderful woman with the naughtiest sense of humor. She’s delicious and mischievous, and she brings such a gravitas to Lilian. For the past few episodes, I’ve just had scenes with her in prison scrubs, and she’s still the most beautiful, chilling, wonderful woman. I’m like, “How do you do this? We’re sitting at a table, and you’ve created a character that jumps off the screen.” Between that and Jon Cryer coming in, I feel like the Luthor family is absolutely spoiled with talent.

TVLINE | Speaking of Lex, we were all very curious to see what Cryer would bring to the role. As his scene partner, was there anything you found surprising about his take on the character?

We had quite a few scenes when we first started, but they were all of him with cancer. I was still really interested in what he was doing, but when we filmed the opening scene … he completely blew me away. I’d only seen one side of him when we were filming all the cancer stuff, so when I saw him playing the mad megalomaniac, I was like, “Oh, we are in for a treat.” He’s taken the idea of Lex from the comic book and really brought it to life. We are so lucky. Robert [Rovner] and Jessica [Queller] got it so right in casting him.

TVLINE | Switching gears, what can we expect coming up from Kara and Lena?

Lena’s going to have a difficult time coming to terms with the fact that she lied and betrayed her friendship with Kara to help Lex. It’s weighs on her very heavily, but it’s addressed coming up, so I don’t want to say too much.

TVLINE | How about Lena and James? Will she regret giving him the haranel?

For sure. She gave it to him not thinking it was going to give him powers. The man she loves, but ultimately realized she couldn’t be with, was dying. She didn’t fully understand what she was doing, but it was a Hail Mary. As the season goes on, you start to see the ramifications of that decision. I think she feels guilty that she made that choice for him, yet he’s the one who has to deal with it. She’s a strange Luthor, because she has such a huge moral compass. Any decision like this will weigh on her and affect her. The more you see Lex and Lilian, you see that the morality is uniquely Lena.

TVLine.

[thewreckkelly]

No-one told me it was going to be this way ...... 

My daughter, Eve, dropped by last Saturday evening armed with a deliciously light chocolate cake, microwave popcorn and grapefruit juice. She was clad in black athletic lycra while prancing about in Addias trainers – apparently that’s the gear best suited to a long hike over some local sierra or other.

The ambition we shared for the evening - after her exertions in the Spanish Hills - was to waste a Saturday after dark at the movies in my living room.

No film actually made it past the opening credits - mainly due to the fact we had collectively exhausted anything worthwhile on HBO, Netflix and Prime due to the long incarceration of pandemic leaving only the stuff of nightmares.

So we spent the ensuing hours solving personal and global problems with considered insight, calculated resolutions and no end of smugness at our own intellect.

Hence the popcorn remained un-nuked while the chocolate cake became mere crumbs as it fuelled conversation while pandering to dietary indulgence.

She left my casa at an hour past the witching one – entertained by her father’s brilliant mind rather than some Hollywood dross -  and disappeared into the night on her VW steed, (she didn’t take the popcorn with her - though she’d guzzled all the grapefruit water and most of the cake)

By Sunday evening I couldn’t hold out any longer and finally gave in to the terrible temptation of brown corn in a brown bag. Three minutes was all it took to fill the flowing bowl with butter, salt and the exploded kernel.

Bliss I say, Bliss .... but ..... what to watch ... what indeed  ....... I flicked disconsolately through rows and rows of dull digital offerings until - before you could clap your hands, (cha cha cha cha) - I pressed 'watch now' on the ‘Friends Reunion’ icon – secure in the knowledge no-one I know would ever know.

I’m always wary of actors when they’re not acting – particularly when they’re not acting while in front of cameras and a live audience. But there are six very good reasons this show of seventeen years ago has been viewed over 100 billion times – Ross, Monica, Chandler, Rachel Joey and Phoebe.

(I don’t remember when I first watched the show and I was never what you would call a devotee; however I also don’t remember ever thinking it wasn’t quality, I mean proper quality.)

And so I sat down to this guilty pleasure and reacquainted myself with some people I felt I knew well enough to call by their first names. It was an exquisite experience – funny and gentle and funny and gentle.

Memories of times and places vied for attention on the fringe of my mind while I remained glued to the antics on the screen - allowing a nostalgia to seep into the present with nothing to offer but goodness, innocence, laughter and a sense of how it should be in a well written, well played world of make believe.

I thought of my daughter who knew the show then and ever since. I thought of my grandchildren who know the show now and are unlikely to let it go. I thought of all the people I know who practice cynicism and comedic brutality in the progressive pursuit of free expression - and somehow knew they couldn’t have a bad word to say about this ten year long recurring moment in situation comedy gold.

I thought of all these people and felt they could or would enjoy this experience as much as me – and that just made it so much better somehow.

David, Courteney, Jennifer, Lisa and the two Matt’s came across in their maturity as good types who, from the safety of the past, are welcome into my company anytime – smart successful people with a wicked sense of ordinariness woven through a botox attractiveness that works for them and me, (it really is how our stars should be - and shine - when performing without a script).  

I know I should make some reference to the writers and the supporting cast but they are the other players to this court of jesters – a court where the Gods of light entertainment sewed together ordinariness wrapped around simplicity and elevated it over and above the norm to touch the heavens at times.

(Suffice to say these people and their characters work, for me, in both worlds.)

My daughter nailed it; she said the show – any episode Dad – was the antidote that cured bad days and made her feel the fuzzy comfort of easy happiness.

A perfect way to enjoy a bowl of popcorn methinks!

[sebeth]

Babs-a-thon, Part 5

Warning, Spoilers Ahead…

 Oracle debuted in Suicide Squad #23.  The true identity of Oracle was a complete mystery – man, woman, group?

Oracle would provide information for the Squad until the mystery was solved in Suicide Squad #38. It was a rather low-key revelation: Amanda contacts Oracle in cyber-space.  Oracle questions why Flo (the Oracle’s usual contact) isn’t the one reaching out. Amanda informs Oracle that Flo died on a mission.  The next panel reveals a wheelchair-bound redhead, a Batgirl plushie on the desk, mourning the loss of her friend.

I love the subtle revelation of Oracle’s secret identity.  No storming the secret lair and gasping in shock.  A simple one-panel revelation that relied on the art to provide the clues to her identity.  Not that it didn’t blow my mind at the time.

A small pause in the Babs-a-thon to promote John Ostrander, Kim Yale, and the 1980s’ Suicide Squad title. If you haven’t read the Ostrander/Yale run – what are you waiting for?  Ostrander & Yale created two of the most unique, groundbreaking, and iconic women in comics:  Amanda Waller and Barbara Gordon as Oracle.  The Squad consistently had multiple female characters – Flo, Karen, Nightshade, Enchantress, Mind-Boggler, Plastique, Vixen, Duchess, Jewlee, Poison Ivy – all different types of personalities, all written well.  The development of the villains was great – Captain Boomerang and Deadshot owed their prominence to this title.  Read this series!

Back to the Babs-a-thon –

Barbara had two more prominent appearance in the Squad.  In Suicide Squad #48, Barbara visits her therapist.  Babs reveals she has a recurring dream – she runs down a corridor to open the door – the identity of the person on the other side changes – it ranges from the Joker, Jim Gordon, Batman, to Batgirl herself.  The individual always has a gun and shoots her.  Babs doesn’t reveal the multiple choices to the therapist and focuses on the Joker –

“And then I feel the bullet boring its way through my body.  My legs give way, useless as my spine is severed.  There’s this awful wrench and grinding in my back – like a clutch out of gear – and then pain.  There’s a woman screaming for rescue that never comes.  And the room stinks of cordite and blood – my blood – and the Joker claws at me.  And there is pain.  And then the Joker is beating me, and he smells like paraffin and rotten lilacs, screeching I’m not cooperating, and every blow reverberates through my shot-out, shattered spine.  And there is pain.  And then – then – when he’s – when I’m naked – he starts taking pictures and I can’t stop him! And when – when he’s done – the Joker just…laughs!”

“For six months all I had was pain.  They had to build a bridge between sections of my spine just so I could sit up straight. And I will never, never, never walk again.”

The therapy session would be taking place around 2 years after the Killing Joke.  The Batman Chronicles story mentioned 6 months of therapy and Babs spent a year training with Richard Dragon, throw in 6 months to establish contact/work with the Suicide Squad = 2 years.

Bab’s paralysis/recovery, Jason’s death/resurrection, the 4 Robins, and Dick becoming Nightwing are all examples of why the New 52 compressed 5-year timeline doesn’t work for the Bat Family.  Barbara and Jason’s respective Joker traumas were the defining obstacle of their lives – it took time and much inner strength to overcome.  In the New 52, Babs, in a space of 5 years, became Batgirl, was paralyzed by the Joker, created the Oracle identity, formed the Birds of Prey, disbanded the Birds of Prey, regained the ability to walk, discarded the Oracle identity, and regained enough athletic ability to resume the Batgirl role. So, Babs was paralyzed for less than a month?  Still traumatizing but it removes the strength and struggle it took for Babs to even create the Oracle role.

The therapist informs Barbara: “You have a right to be angry.  It was a heinous act.  It was unfair.  You need to tell other people about your rage – like your father.  Whenever you’re with him, you put on the act of perky, plucky Barbara Gordon. Why?”

Barbara responds: “What good would it do to get mad?  He’d only feel more ashamed and guilty.  He holds himself responsible.  Dad always refused to have an officer of duty guarding us like they do in other cities. Wanted to be more ‘accessible’ to the taxpayers.  We were ‘accessible’ all right.”

“But you do blame him – and Batman.  Not unreasonably!”

“I mostly blame myself mostly.  I should’ve known better than to just pop open the door without seeing who it was.”

“Why? Why should you have known better?”

Barbara leaves the therapy session, worrying that she has “another murderous sociopath stalking me!”

“And whose fault is this one, Barbara?  Batman’s? Dad’s?  Simon LaGrieve?  Uh-uh. You wanted to be a superhero again so you created a computer version and called yourself Oracle.  But you weren’t as good as you thought you were.  Stop it!  No more self-pity.  No more playing the victim!  Whatever it takes, Thinker, I’ll deal with you – myself!”

Trademark Barbara determination and independence on display.

Suicide Squad #49 was near the tail-end of Babs’ run with the team.  Barbara continues to be stalked by the Thinker.

Babs is at the Gotham City Police Department Shooting Range: “What am I doing?  I hate guns!  Shut up! You know very well what you’re doing! You’re preparing to kill someone. You touched that maniac’s mind! You know what he wants to do! Carmichael’s a sociopath!  He wants to kill you, your father – anyone who care’s anything about you!  You swore – never again!  You’d never be a victim again!  Isn’t there any other way?  Of course there is – I could just go tell Dad.  But that would be the end of Oracle.  The only place I have left where I can walk, where I can run, where I can dance is the cybernet!  I lost my physical mobility because of one madman, must I lose my mental freedom as well?”

Notice that Bab’s never entertains the thought of contacting Batman or Nightwing.  It reinforces the pre-Crisis and immediate post-Crisis canon that Barbara was not an intimate member of the Bat Family.  I’m in the minority but I prefer it this way.  I love Bab’s as an independent, adult woman, who, while inspired by Batman, carved her own path as a hero – one who didn’t need or require his guidance or approval.  I prefer that Batman, amazed by Bab’s intelligence, strength, and determination, brought her into the fold after she created the Oracle identity.  I feel Bruce saw Babs as well-intentioned but lacked the “true dedication” in her Batgirl career.  He wasn’t wrong as Babs had retired her Batgirl-career pre-Killing Joke.  Post Killing-Joke, Bruce realized Babs wasn’t here to play!  We shouldn’t underestimate the guilt Bruce felt – not only for the shooting but for laughing with the Joker.

Babs wonders if she can bring herself to shoot Carmichael: “I won’t be a victim again.  But does that mean I must become a killer?  It flies in the face of everything I was taught – everything I believe!  But perhaps everything I was taught to believe is wrong.  Don’t we have the right to defend ourselves?”

Barbara hides out at the Hotel Tamarindo.  Carmichael storms into the room, yelling for “Amy!”

Babs/Amy claims she only ships computers to Oracle but has never seen the actual person.

Carmichael throws Babs out of her wheelchair and threatens to “rip open her mind” and discover the truth.

Carmichael’s interrupted by Amanda Waller’s entrance: “So there you are, you nasty boy, you.”

“I know you.  You’re Amanda Waller!  I read all about you in the papers a year or so back!  But you couldn’t be Oracle – or could you?!”

Carmichael tries to control Amanda’s mind but fails.  Amanda and Carmichael brawl while Barbara grabs her gun: “Stand away from him, Mrs. Waller.”

“You can’t do it, girl.”

“I’ve got to do it! He’s a sociopath – he wants to kill me and my family – my friends!”

“Who you really trying to kill, girl?”

Babs visualizes shooting the Joker, Batman, Jim Gordon, and Batgirl.

“No one.  Take this, please, Mrs. Waller.”

Waller knocks Carmichael unconscious and offers Babs continued work with the Suicide Squad: “Also got an offer to make to you.  You got a thing about privacy.  Fine. I won’t pry.  But I think we can be a help to each other if you’re willing to listen.”

“You saved my life and helped keep me from taking a life.  All right, Mrs. Waller – I’ll listen.”

I love the mutual respect between Babs and Amanda.  Amanda didn’t threaten or blackmail Babs – she simply made an offer and was willing to back off if Barbara declined.  

For those unfamiliar with Amanda’s backstory, she came from a poor background, suffered numerous heart-breaking tragedies, and built herself up by pure force of will.  I think Amanda sees herself in Barbara – another woman brought down low by outside forces who raised herself up through pure determination.

Barbara would continue to aid the Suicide Squad but I’m switching to Showcase ’94 #12.

“A Little Knowledge” by Scott Peterson and Brian Stelfreeze.  The short story takes place during the Prodigal-era of the Bat titles. Babs has stopped working with the Squad and began to make appearances in the Bat titles.  

Babs hears a knock on her door – she opens it (using the peephole first), and discovers a rodent impaled by a knife.

“I can’t help wondering if they have to deal with this kind of thing in Metropolis.”

Babs receives a call: “I’ve been watching you.”

What is it with Babs and stalkers?

Barbara continues her work day: “A note from Robin.  Great kid. Knows his stuff, too.  And he always thanks me for the help.  Means more to me than the money they send my way once in a while.”

Yes, Tim is polite and gracious.  Unlike Bruce.

“Not that I’m complaining. Their generosity is what keeps me state of the art.  Still, as much as I love Robin, I wish I didn’t get the feeling that he and Alfred were the only ones sending the mysterious checks I receive, funneled through dummy corporation seven times removed.  Like I wouldn’t find out.”

Sorry, boys, you can’t fool the Oracle.

Babs continues to receive calls and weird notes.

Barbara is out grocery shopping when someone shoots at her: “I’m on my way home when the first shots fired. I see it hit the pavement before I hear it, and I’m already looking for places to dive.  Then I remember I can’t dive anywhere anymore.  I’m about to be shot.  And there’s nothing I can do.  Again.”

Babs returns home and receives another threatening call.

Babs has an origin/Killing Joke flashback:

“It was the Batman who made me want to become a hero myself.  And even after he made it clear he didn’t want another partner, I kept at it.”

Independent Babs for the win!

“It was fun.  Until the night when all the fun went away…forever.”

“I worked with what I had. From my days as Gotham’s head librarian I knew how to find out whatever I needed.  If I could do that for citizens, I could do it for colleges, non-profit corporations, private investigators and super-heroes.  Having been blessed with photographic recall, I studied a dozen newspapers, four dozen magazines, and my main haunt, the computer bulletin boards.  I even hacked into the Gotham Bar Association to take the exam, just out of curiosity. Passed the first time, piece of cake. But the whole time I was improving my mind, I never got over losing the use of my legs.  Although, when I think back on it all, I can’t believe I used to fight crime with a brown belt in Judo.  A brown belt, for God’s sake.”

Barbara decides to talk to a friend.  Enter Batman (Dick Grayson) via Batcave phone call.

Barbara confides in Dick: “The last time I was in a physical confrontation I shot a secret service agent. The time before that I got my spine blown out by the Joker.  You can see why I’m a little nervous.  Not exactly a great track record.  I’m afraid.”

Dick advises: “Barbara, look – it…it never really goes away, you can try to lock it up, you can pretend you don’t feel it, but…but the fear’s always there somewhere.  You can never escape it.  You just have to overcome it.  You have to prove you’re stronger.  Do you want help with this guy?”

“No.  Thanks, Dick, but…no.  I need to do this on my own.  I need to know if I can.”

My personal feeling is Barbara was brought into the Bat Family circle during the Knightsend/Prodigal era.  I believe Dick is the one that invited Babs into the “family”.  Not in a romantic way.  Bruce was largely absent during from Gotham during this era and Dick will always be the more social/team-oriented member of the family.  I see a reveal similar to the Batwoman/Nightwing moment in Batman: Bad Blood.  The twist being that Barbara knows the secret identities – she’s had a lot of time to research since the Killing Joke.

Babs waits in her apartment. She receives another call: “Get ready, little girl.  Here I come.” And the lights and phone go out.

Babs uses a back-up generator to access her computers.  The security cameras reveal a Nick Riley: “And I finally understand who wants to kill me, and why.”

“I finally push the button. The first thing I installed.  The think I hoped I never have to use.”

Riley enters the apartment: “You and me, we’re going to have a whole lotta fun.”

“No.  I don’t believe this is going to be very much fun for you at all.”

Babs beats the man into unconsciousness.  She then calls out to another man: “You can come in now, Mister Armonk.”

Armonk was sent to jail for murder two years ago with the assistance of Barbara Gordon.  Armonk prepares to shoot Babs but she whips out her escrima sticks and knocks him out.

Batman compliments: “Nice job.”

“Batman?  How long have you been here?”

“About five minutes. I came as soon as I got your signal.”

“Why didn’t you give me a hand?”

“Didn’t look like you needed it.”

“Hey, you looked good. Really good.  How did it feel?”

“It felt good.  I hope I don’t need to do that again.  But it feels good to know I can.  It may not be swinging from rooftops, but…but it’s not bad. Not bad at all.”

Babs would shortly form the Birds of Prey, first as a partnership with Black Canary and later expanding into a full-fledged group.  One of my favorite series but it’s simply too lengthy to include in a Babs-a-thon.

Barbara’s other major development of the 90’s/2000’s was her romance with Dick Grayson.  I started as a fan of the pairing.  Babs – in the immediate post-Crisis era – dismissed Robin as a flirtatious, too young boy.  Pre-Crisis, Babs dated Clark Kent and had a lengthy romance with Jason Bard.  In both eras, Babs was intrigued by Batman.  The point I’m making is Barbara dated adult men because she was an adult.

Shortly after the Prodigal era, Barbara and Dick began to head in a romantic direction.  What I wanted, and what was initially portrayed, was Barbara falling for an older, more mature Dick.  Dick is an adult and their age difference is no longer an issue for Barbara.  Their early romance had touching moments as Babs let down her guard and allowed Dick in. Dick was still healing over the brutal end of his relationship with Starfire, so it made sense to go slow.

It didn’t take long for the pairing to jump the tracks for me.  First, Babs is continually de-aged to become Dick Grayson’s one (only?) true love. First, no.  Second, why does Babs have to be the one to have her history and accomplishments removed to accommodate Dick?  Why does she lose her independence to become yet another sidekick of Batman? Third, Dick’s true love of his teenage/college years is Starfire.  It’s Dick’s first intense, full-out love experience.

I could go on for a while about this pairing but I’ll save that for a separate post.

This concludes my Babs-a-thon.  The issues mentioned in parts 1 – 5 cemented my impression of Barbara: an intelligent, determined, driven woman.  I adored Barbara as Batgirl but it’s as Oracle that she became a force of nature in the DC Universe.