#i know you are the same. i know we are mirrors of each other. i know this but i will never accept you much like how i cannot accept myself.

[seulrinnie-rinrin]

Rhythm of Desire

SUMMARY | You and Mingi get paired up for a special song collab that calls for sexy dancing and smooth seductive vocals and rapping. You can’t help but want each other. PAIRING | Mingi/Reader GENRE | smut with no (maybe a little) plot, uprotected sex (wrap it up everyone!), fingering, vaginal sex, praising, dirty talk RATING | Mature LENGTH | 6643 words AUTHOR’S NOTE | Why does this have so much dialogue? LOL

“So…” You stood in front of the mirrors in the dance studio, watching Mingi through the reflection. “Is this it? Are we just going to stare at each other like idiots for the rest of the night?”

He looked up from his phone, frowning at you. “I’m just trying to figure out this part of the dance. We’re supposed to be in sync with our bodies, but I can feel when you try to do something different. It throws me off.”

“Why? It’s not like it matters if we don’t look exactly alike, right?”

He shrugged. “We’re singing about sexual innuendo, so it needs to feel real.”

“Mingi,” you sighed, running a hand through your loose hair. “We’ve worked together on other projects before. You know my moves and I know your moves. Why is it suddenly such a big deal now?”

He rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He pulled himself closer, standing behind you. His breath was warm against your neck as he spoke into your ear. “I just think maybe… maybe it’ll be easier if we could move together more smoothly.”

“That sounds good,” you said slowly, not wanting to say anything that might cause another argument between you two. After all, one thing you knew for sure was that working with Mingi wasn’t easy.

You knew he took his craft seriously. Every movement had meaning, every word was calculated to fit the rhythm perfectly, and every bit of his body language was designed to bring out his natural charisma. While it wasn’t your style to work that way, you still appreciated what he did for a living, and you respected him for it. If you didn’t care about how he worked, then why should he care how you did things?

He pressed his hips against yours and smirked when you leaned back against him. Your skin tingled from the contact and you swallowed thickly, your heart racing as his hands slid down your arms to grasp your wrists.

“Let’s see if this helps us synchronize better,” he whispered.

The music started playing again, and you watched him take a deep breath, concentrating on your movements. Slowly, you mimicked his posture, feeling the beat sync with your breathing. The sway of your hips grew deeper as your breasts brushed his chest, causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. He kept the same pace with you, only pressing in closer when the music called for it.

Every time he moved close to you, it felt like a taunt. As if he wanted to kiss you and show you what he really meant by the lines he sang. But you held yourself together as best you could, taking deep breaths to calm your nerves.

This wasn’t like the times before where you and him worked on projects side by side. No, these moments were… intimate, almost. For some reason, being this close to him made you forget everything else around you, focusing solely on the person you were touching.

A sigh escaped your lips as you dropped your gaze, looking down at your feet as they moved forward and back in time with Mingi’s. What would it be like if you actually kissed him? What would it be like if he actually touched you? The thoughts alone made you blush furiously, and you tried hard to push them away. This was your job after all, and your place was here, dancing with Mingi, not fantasizing about him.

When the song ended, Mingi let go of your wrists and stepped slightly back. “It feels more natural now,” he admitted quietly, nodding at himself in the mirror.

“Good,” you replied, knowing that no matter what, you couldn’t allow your mind to wander towards anything romantic. “Hopefully the singing part will be easier once we’ve done this.”

He smiled softly. “We have twenty minutes left. Let’s practice singing while moving our bodies in sync. I want you to mimic my movements exactly, and I’ll match yours. Got it?”

You nodded. “Got it.”

And so the next twenty minutes went by in silence. Each movement matched perfectly, and you lost yourself completely to the art of synchronized dance. By the end of it, your legs were shaking with fatigue, but you couldn’t bring yourself to move away from him. His presence surrounded you, and you couldn’t find it within yourself to stop this new form of intimacy.

Finally, the song ended and he stepped away, stretching his arms over his head and yawning widely. “Oh man, I am exhausted. And hungry too. Wonder if the rest of the group ate.”

You nodded, rising to your feet. “Let’s go check.”

Minutes later, you found everyone sitting on the floor in one of the other practice rooms, plates full of food sitting in front of them. Everyone was talking amongst themselves and eating their meals without even glancing at you and Mingi. When you approached, Jiae, the leader and rapper of the girl group you were in, waved to you, getting up from the floor to meet you halfway.

“How’d it go?” she asked excitedly, leading you towards the rest of the other girls in your group. “Did you guys manage to make any progress?”

“I think so,” you answered, smiling faintly.

As soon as you sat down, Ari, one of the group’s vocalists, leaned towards you, eyes sparkling. “Something going on between you and Mingi? I caught a glimpse of your practice and it looked like y’all were flirting!”

You glanced at Mingi who merely shrugged, eating his food casually. “Nothing serious,” you said lightly.

“Nothing serious?” Hongjoong’s voice echoed from somewhere in the room. “I did not write that song thinking y’all would dance like that! Do I need to rewrite the lyrics to match?”

Everyone turned to look at him, laughter in their voices. Yunho’s eyes darted between yours and Mingi’s. “You should. There’s some pretty steamy stuff there.”

You flushed, leaning forward to hide your face with your plate. “It’s nothing. We’re just doing our job.”

San shook his head. “Not anymore,” he murmured, grinning smugly. “Look at you.”

You turned back to look at him, blinking as he pointed at you and Mingi. “What?”

“I’m not blind. You’re both looking at each other like you wanna jump each other’s bones.”

Your cheeks burned with embarrassment, making you turn back to your meal.

Mingi coughed lightly. “There is nothing between us, okay?”

“Uh huh. Sure,” Seonghwa said, sounding skeptical. “We wouldn’t want to ruin this precious friendship of ours.”

“Mingi is my friend,” you protested, even though you knew you were fighting a losing battle.

“Well… I am glad that you are friends with someone like Mingi.” Hongjoong smirked. “I’m still changing those lyrics.”

You sighed, picking at your food. All around you, people were talking about the performance, wondering whether or not you guys would pull it off successfully. Eventually, Jiae cleared her throat loudly, bringing everyone’s attention back to her. “Should we take the day off tomorrow? We’ve all been working hard, and we should give ourselves a break.”

Everyone voiced their approval and began talking about their plans for tomorrow. You glanced over at Mingi, noticing that he seemed tired too. It made sense considering that you had practiced for hours and hours since the morning. Maybe it was time to call it quits and call it a day.

You stood, stretching your limbs carefully. The soreness in your thighs caused you to wince and you rubbed at them absently. “My body is aching.”

“After what you two were doing?” Wooyoung called out, the others snickering. “I think it’s a miracle you can stand straight.”

“Get a room,” Sera, the other dancer in your group, added playfully, nudging Aimee, the main vocalist. Both girls burst into giggles.

“Eonnie, you have to admit that your dancing was different than usual.” Aimee grinned slyly. “Very different. Admit it. You always wanted to do a sexy song, huh?”

You pouted at her. “Nope. Not admitting anything.”

Her grin widened. “Ah, Eonnie. Can I ask you something?”

“If you must,” you grumbled.

She gave you an innocent look before leaning in and whispering to you and the other girls. “Do you like Mingi?”

The other girls turned to look at you with wide eyes, most of them asking the same question. You fiddled with your hands nervously, frowning at Aimee. She had a strange gleam in her eye and you wondered if she was joking or not. “Like him as a friend? Yeah, of course. Why?”

Aimee huffed. “Not what I meant and you know that.”

“And if something happens, you’ll be the first to know.” You said, the girl beaming happily. “Okay?”

“Deal.”

You paused for a moment, watching as everyone got up to leave the studio, leaving you and Mingi behind. “So… we finished practicing today? Are you heading home now?”

“Not yet. There’s this part I want to try before I go home. Do you want to come?”

The offer came as a surprise, but you accepted nonetheless. Mingi wanted to continue practicing? So be it. He must have been feeling ambitious.

You told the girls that you and Mingi were going to continue training, receiving several questions from everyone, including how you felt about him, if you were attracted to him and if you would sleep with him. Finally, you convinced everyone to leave you two alone.

Mingi’s bandmates asked him the same questions when he told them about continuing to practice. But despite their initial shock, they didn’t protest much. In fact, Hongjoong laughed, slapping him on the shoulder. “Make sure you use protection if you end up fucking each other. I’m still changing those lyrics for y’all.”

Mingi only laughed, smiling gently as the others filed out of the room. The empty studio fell silent, except for the sound of your breathing and the humming coming from the speakers in the background. As much as you loved the music, you could feel Mingi staring at you, studying every inch of your body. Slowly, he reached out, placing a gentle hand on your hip. His touch sends shivers through your body, and you let out a soft gasp, nearly dropping your bag in shock.

“Don’t freak out,” he said softly, his fingers tightening slightly around your hip. “I won’t hurt you.”

You nodded slowly, but found it difficult to speak. What was happening? Why did his touch affect you so much? This never happened when you worked with him before. But here, right now, everything about him felt familiar. Like you had known him forever. Your heart started racing and your palms grew sweaty. You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath.

“Okay,” you whispered.

His touch remained firm, pulling you tight against his body. His chest pressed against your back, he held out his phone as you watched the demo choreography. “Okay for this part, it looks like this. But I think we should be closer. To give it that intimate feeling.”

You frowned, watching the dancers on the screen as they continued moving closer together. The more you thought about it, the more you realized that it might work. Granted the dancers didn't move that close to each other during the performance, but maybe, just maybe, having Mingi hold you like this will add an extra layer of sensuality to the performance.

You watched as the dancers were supposed to grind against each other and you couldn't help but wrap an arm around his neck, allowing your hand to brush against his cheek. "Close enough?"

"Yeah,” he breathed, his chest vibrating as he laughed quietly. “Perfect."

Your gaze lowered to his lips and you swallowed thickly. "Good."

Mingi chuckled. "Let's see how well you can follow directions then."

You whimpered softly, shifting your hips, arching your back as you tried to mimic what the dancers on the screen were doing. Mingi trailed his fingers along your skin, causing goosebumps to rise across your arms. "More. Less. More. That's better. A little lower. Okay, good. Good. Keep going."

He trailed his fingers along your sides, following the curves and valleys of your body. Your hips rolled in response, seeking out his touch. A low groan escaped his lips and you moaned, grinding your hips against his groin. With another chuckle, he captured your chin with his fingers, turning your face upwards to meet his gaze. "Much better."

Too close. He was way too close. And it wasn't helping your libido any. "Mingi…"

"Not yet," he said huskily. "I've got plans for you later. But for now, let me show you how it's done. Come here."

Your heart leapt into your throat and you shook your head, stuttering. "Y-you can't."

He laughed, amusement glinting in his eyes. "Of course I can. Don't you want to learn how to do this right?"

"No."

"Yes," he said, pressing himself firmly against you, forcing you to remain exactly where you were. His erection was hard and hot against your ass and you pushed back, causing him to laugh again.

"Come on, you're doing great," he encouraged, nuzzling your earlobe with his nose. "Just like that. I'll teach you. No one has to know."

In truth, you weren't sure why you hesitated. The idea of being intimate with him sounded enticing and after spending countless hours working on the song with him, you kind of wanted to know what it was like to have sex with him. At least you hoped it would feel similar to the way you imagined it would feel. You squirmed, wanting desperately to reach back and undo his pants. To release his throbbing cock. The thought of him pounding into you made your insides clench. "Oh God."

"What are you thinking about?" he murmured against your ear, nibbling lightly at your lobe.

"You."

He chuckled. "What about me?"

You shook your head. "Not telling you. It's private."

His smile faltered. "You aren't attracted to me, are you?"

You blinked, startled by the sudden change in topic. "Huh? No! Of course not!"

He paused, running a finger down your spine. "But you were thinking about it. About us having sex."

"I was not." You huffed. "Stop reading my mind."

"It doesn't mean I can't read your thoughts." He placed a gentle kiss against your temple. "You want this as badly as I do."

"You..." You looked at him. "You want this too?"

Mingi laughed. "Baby, haven't you realized the effects you have on me when you press yourself against me?"

You flushed, your cheeks growing warmer as he nipped at your jawline.

"We can stop if you don't want to do this anymore." He offered you a tentative smile.

"That's not fair." You said quietly, looking up at him with soft eyes. "You can't expect us to stop after you've gotten me all hot and bothered."

"True." He chuckled, resting his forehead against yours. "Maybe we should take things slow tonight. Maybe you should let me fuck you, one day. If you ever want me to."

"What about after we successfully finish the project?" You breathed out, his lips awfully close to yours. "We can sneak off right after we finish performing and Yunho and his team goes on stage."

"Really?"

"Yeah..."

"Damn, you're tempting me, baby." He groaned, nipping playfully at your lower lip. "Can I kiss you until then? Please?"

It took you all of five seconds to nod, closing the distance between your lips. His mouth crushed against yours, hot and demanding. You parted your lips for him, letting him slide his tongue inside your mouth. Before you knew it, you were kissing him back eagerly, your entire body heating up with desire. He broke away for a second, cupping your cheek, his thumb stroking the side of your face gently. You sighed contently, letting him draw small circles on your cheekbone.

"Shouldn't we be practicing our dance moves instead?" You mumbled into his mouth.

"Later." He pulled back, breaking contact with your lips. "Kissing first, then dancing. Okay?"

You returned home to the dorms well after midnight when your members rushed towards the front door, yelling about you and Mingi. Well, there went any chance you had of getting some shut eye.

Aimee latched onto your arm and dragged you to the living room. "Eonnie, something happened right?"

"What did you and Mingi get up to after we all left?" Jiae asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Did you two kiss?" Ari leaned forward, curiously.

You bit your lip, looking away in response. The other members exchanged glances. Sera took in your appearance, noting your slightly disheveled hair.

"Oh, you lucky bitch. You and Mingi totally kissed." She grinned. "How was it? Was he good at it?"

You let out a small nod, your cheeks burning bright red. "He was amazing."

Jiae giggled. "Seriously?"

"Yes," you insisted. "He kissed really well."

The other members exchanged glances once again. "Was it...?" Aimee began, holding her hand up. "Were you guys… sexually active? Did he…?"

You shot her a glare. "Of course not!"

"Wow, Aimee." Jiae shook her head, folding her arms across her chest. "You always choose the most awkward ways to ask these questions."

"Even if I'm having sex, I'm not telling you guys." You stuck out your tongue at them. "I might not be leader but I am older than all of you and I have the eldest sister rights, remember?"

Sera let out a loud snort, rolling her eyes. "I knew someone was going to kiss someone this time around. We've been working with the guys throughout the years. I had a feeling it would be you and San though. But Mingi...wow."

Jiae nodded her agreement. "He is fucking gorgeous, isn't he? And so talented. I bet he's amazing in bed too."

"Hush." You waved your hand in front of her face. "Don't start."

"Aww, eonnie." Ari pouted, grabbing onto your hand. "I'm happy for you. Really. I am."

Jiae let out a sigh. "I guess I'll have to make peace with the fact that you guys are dating then."

"Hey, who said anything about dating?"

Jiae smirked. "Aren't you?"

"I'm actually not sure." You sighed. "We haven't exactly got to talking while we made out, you know."

Aimee nodded slowly. "Well, even if you aren't dating him, you still kissed him. That counts as you liking him."

"I'm going to head to bed." You muttered, standing from the couch.

"Oh no." Aimee grabbed onto your wrist. "Where are you going?"

"To sleep. Like everyone else."

"But we have the day off tomorrow!" Ari exclaimed.

"I know, I know." You nodded. "But I've been dancing all day and I'm exhausted. I'll treat you all to food, okay? Eldest sister rights and all that."

Jiae gave you a sly grin. "Okay. But don't blame us if we buy the most expensive food, tomorrow."

"I won't." You smiled brightly. "Sleep tight, guys."

You waved goodbye before leaving the living room. Once you reached your bedroom, you stripped off your clothes quickly and crawled under the covers, reaching for the phone you kept next to your bedside table. You checked your messages just to be safe, surprised to find one waiting for you.

Mingi - Sleeping? Call me.

You brought up his contact and decided to facetime him instead. He picked up in a matter of seconds. He was in his bed and you noticed that he was shirtless, lying flat on his back. "Finally."

"Sorry. My members were grilling me with questions. Not a minute passed without someone asking something."

"If it makes you feel better, the guys all asked me the same thing." He laughed as he sat up in bed. "Asking all sorts of questions."

"Ha ha, I bet they did." You smiled, leaning back on your pillows. "So what did they ask?"

"Mostly about us, our relationship and stuff." He shrugged. "And yes, the sleeping thing was probably the worst question."

"We'll get to that one later." You glanced over at the clock on the nightstand. 1am. "Did you eat dinner?"

"Yeah." He nodded. "Seonghwa-hyung left some food out for me. Did you eat?"

"I ate. Not much though. Couldn't really eat when the girls were being so nosy."

"Tell me about it." He agreed, running his fingers through his messy hair. "Since we're off tomorrow...would you be interested in doing something together? Just you and me?"

"Song Mingi. Are you asking me out? On a date?"

"Sort of." He replied. "We don't need to go on an actual date to spend time together. Just us hanging out would be fine."

"You know I'd spend time with you anywhere, anytime." You assured him. "I wouldn't turn down an opportunity to see you."

"Ahh...what is your pretty little brain thinking about? Do tell."

"Nothing." You laughed softly. "My brain is busy processing your request."

"So cute." He laughed. "Are you alone right now?"

You nodded. "Yeah, I have my own room. Oldest sister rights."

"Good." He sighed. "Tell me...what are you wearing to bed right now?"

"Mingi, seriously?"

"What?" He tilted his head, narrowing his eyes at you. "Is it inappropriate? Come on, babe. Indulge me. Don't hold back."

You rolled your eyes. "Fine. I'm wearing a t-shirt and shorts."

He let out a long breath. "Wow."

"Okay, that wasn't what I expected." You teased.

"I thought you would wear some skimpy nightie or something." He said honestly. "Something lacy."

"Maybe when I move out from the dorms." You grinned. "Can't risk the girls barging in here if we were to have phone sex or whatever else we were planning to do."

"Look at you planning ahead. So mature."

"Shut up."

"Anyways…" He paused. "You're not wearing underwear under your sleeping clothes, right?"

"I swear Mingi. You're such a perv. What are YOU wearing to bed?"

"Pajamas pants." He said as he adjusted the sheets around his waist to show you the waistband of his pajama pants. "See?"

"Those are-" You cleared your throat. "They look great."

"Thanks." He said with a shy smile. "Anyway, you still have to answer my question."

"You still want to know if I'm wearing underwear or not?"

"Yep."

"Fine but I'll show you instead." You lifted your t-shirt up to show him. "I'm not wearing anything underneath."

He sucked in a breath, staring intently at your bare breasts through the camera. "Oh, fuck."

"Glad you like them." You rolled your eyes. "I'll put my top back down if you promise not to touch yourself."

He raised his eyebrows. "Not a guarantee that I won't. You got great tits."

"Mmm... Well if you do decide to touch yourself, send me a picture."

He groaned loudly. "Are you done teasing me yet?"

"No." You shook your head, grinning. "Why?"

"Because it's going to be hard to not fuck you until after our performance. I've already been thinking about it ever since we kissed earlier."

"You can think about it now. I'll show you how hot I am in person." You promised.

He let out a soft chuckle. "That will be fun. In the meantime, how about you put your top back down and talk to me?"

"Deal."

It was finally time for the performance to begin and you stood backstage, waiting anxiously to take the stage. Sera, San, Wooyoung and Yeosang were currently on stage, performing their latest hit. They seemed confident, full of energy and having a blast on stage. Seeing that only helped to relieve some of your stress. You couldn't help but notice Jiae, Hongjoong and Seonghwa sitting together as they discussed strategy. Ari and Yunho sat next to each other, whispering quietly to each other as they waited for their cue. Aimee and Jongho watched the crowd closely, making sure everything was running smoothly.

Mingi was standing next to you, his hand resting gently on your shoulder. His voice was soft as he spoke. "You ready?"

"Yeah." You nodded, giving him a quick smile. "Ready as I'll ever be."

"Then I hope we don't disappoint." He chuckled lightly.

Your nerves suddenly disappeared as soon as you took the stage. Everyone in the audience cheered loudly and welcomed you with open arms. All eyes were on you as you walked onto the dance floor. The rest of the backup dancers took their positions behind you as the music started playing. You heard the soft, sensual beat fill the room as you moved gracefully to the rhythm.

Your body moved naturally to the music, your hips swaying with every step. Your vocals were flawless and sensual as they flowed into the lyrics. You closed your eyes, letting the music flow through you. And when Mingi finally joined you, touched you, sang and rapped to you, the butterflies in your stomach started fluttering again. You felt electrified by the passion that pulsed between the two of you, as your hands caressed each other, bodies pressed tightly against one another. The heat from his skin warmed yours and it only served to drive you wilder. You were overcome with desire and you needed more than just the physical release. You needed the intense connection, the heart stopping emotions and mind blowing ecstasy that you both had the ability to give each other.

You had barely finished singing the last note before you pulled away, almost breathless. Your cheeks flushed red as the crowd applauded wildly. As soon as the music stopped, you turned to look at Mingi. He was panting heavily as he stared at you, his lips parted slightly. He smiled, causing your heart to skip a beat. The moment was magical and completely perfect. It was like nothing you had experienced before and you hoped it never ended.

You both left the stage as the host called for an interim break before the rest of the group were to perform.

"Damn..." You heard Wooyoung mutter from behind you. "Y/N and Mingi look good together. Really fucking good."

The guys glanced over at the two of you. "They really are amazing." Yeosang admitted, giving you a small wink.

"You guys are dating, right?" Jongho asked. "Because with that performance, there's no way you guys aren't. Anyone can tell."

"Are we?" You looked at Mingi, expectantly.

"Are we?" He mimicked your words, his eyes twinkling playfully. "Well…do we have to say 'yes' to this kind of questioning?"

"Please do." San groaned. "This shit has gone on long enough."

"Whatever. Look at them." Seonghwa scoffed, pointing at the two of you. "Just admit that you're boyfriend and girlfriend already. We'll accept that."

"We are." Mingi said simply, looking directly at you.

Your face lit up as your heart melted at those simple words. There were no doubts anymore. The answer was clear. He wanted you, you wanted him and you knew there was no going back. Everything was perfectly right.

"I'm so happy for you eonnie!" Ari exclaimed. "You guys look amazing together! No wonder you guys make such a great couple."

"Thank you." You smiled, blushing brightly. "It's not like we didn't try to deny it for so long but sometimes things just work out."

"True." She nodded. "I'm glad everything worked out."

"Same here." Sera agreed. "But honestly, I always saw you two together."

"Yeah right." You laughed. "Few weeks ago, you thought me and San would look good together. And that's just the tip of the iceberg."

"Hey, you guys started this mess." Mingi argued. "We just finished it."

Sera rolled her eyes. "God, I wish I could pull you two apart."

You snickered as you turned to look at the others. "Someone needs to. Mingi looks like he's plotting something."

"Who knows what he's thinking?" Yunho mused. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think he wants to fuck Y/N up against a wall somewhere."

"You are disgusting." You laughed.

Mingi grabbed your hand. "I mean..."

Hongjoong looked at your entwined hands and let out a laugh. "Oh god. You two are hopelessly in love. Go on and get your freak on. You guys aren't needed no more."

Mingi whispered into your ear. "Yours or mine?"

"Wherever as long as I have you." You whispered back.

"Works for me." He replied, pulling you closer.

"Bye bye!" Aimee waved at the two of you as she passed you in the hallway.

"Later guys." You called out.

"Bye." Everyone else echoed.

Once the hallway was empty, you leaned in close to Mingi's ear. "So..." You began. "About tonight..."

"Let's get to my place first and then we can discuss the details, babe." He smirked.

"Details?"

"Like what position we're going to fuck in, how many times we're going to fuck and whether we're doing anal." He explained.

"God, you're such a perv." You rolled your eyes. "And we're definitely NOT doing anal."

"You say that now..." He trailed off.

"We'll see." You teased. "Now take me home, Song Mingi."

He laughed. "Always the bossy one, huh? But since you ask so nicely..."

He led you outside and to his car where he held the door open for you. Once inside, he slipped his hand inside the small of your back and gave you a gentle kiss on the lips. "Enjoy the ride."

"I will." You grinned.

His arm wrapped around your shoulders as he drove you to his apartment. The city lights illuminated the windows, bathing the interior in a soft light. Before you knew it, you arrived at the front door and he opened it for you.

"Wow." You breathed, stepping inside.

"What is it?"

"Everything." You sighed, taking it all in. "I'm surprised that you and the guys have such a clean apartment."

"Thank you." He hummed, sliding his hand under your tight dress and cupping your ass cheek. "As much as I love seeing you wearing this outfit, I very much want you out of it. How about I take care of that little problem right now?"

You squealed when he lifted you in his arms and carried you into his bedroom. "Mingi, what if Seonghwa and San come home?"

"No one will be home until tomorrow morning." He growled, setting you on your feet. "Besides, who could possibly walk in on us right now?"

"You sound so sure about that." You eyed him suspiciously.

"Trust me, baby." He assured you. "No one can stop us."

He stepped towards you, pressing your back against the wall. He slowly unzipped your dress, slipping it over your head as he lowered his mouth to yours. You moaned softly as his lips met yours. His tongue delved deep into your mouth, stroking and teasing as he explored your entire mouth.

He reached up and massaged your breasts through your lacy black bra. He squeezed and kneaded your flesh as his hands wandered downwards, squeezing your ass cheeks. "Mmm...so round and firm." He purred against your neck. "How do you feel in these panties?"

"Why do you ask?" You breathed out.

"Because I want to rip them off of you." He told you. "I want to taste you. Do you want that too?"

"Yes..." You whimpered, your body begging for more.

He released your nipples, leaving them tingling as he moved his hands back up to cup your face. His thumb grazed over your bottom lip as he stared down at you. "You know, I've been dreaming about having sex with you for months now."

"Really?" You gasped. "Since when?"

"Ever since the last time we collaborated on a project. Every single day, all night, I kept imagining myself fucking you against this wall." He paused, staring at you. "Or maybe even fucking you in this bed."

"Hmm...it seems like we both got what we wanted." You mused.

"That we did." He nodded. "Come here, babe. Let me show you how thankful I am for all the nights that I imagined fucking you."

Your breathing hitched as he stood before you, slowly taking off his clothes. You watched him with hooded eyes, taking in every inch of his hard muscled form. You ached to be underneath him and explore every inch of his toned body with your hands and your mouth. You wanted to run your fingers through his thick hair and hear his voice begging you to touch him. With his long, beautiful legs and his strong arms and his… Oh god, you couldn't think straight anymore. All you wanted was him and you wouldn't think twice about giving yourself completely to him. You were dying to taste him and to feel his dick deep inside you.

He was breathtaking and you wished that you could freeze frame the moment, making sure that it stayed frozen forever. He placed a hand behind your head, guiding you forward as he kissed you again. Your hands rested on his chest as he pressed himself harder against you.

He broke the kiss as he pushed your underwear to the side, freeing your pussy from its confines. He pushed a finger inside you, making you gasp. "Fuck..." He breathed. "So wet."

He thrust his finger deeper inside of you as he pressed your back against the wall. You bit your lip as you tried to fight the pleasure building within you. He groaned as he added another finger, stretching you out. You arched your back, trying to get more of him inside you.

He pulled his fingers out and trailed his finger over your swollen clit. "Suck it, babe." He commanded. You felt yourself lean forwards, eager to give him what he desired. When you felt his finger slip into your mouth, you sucked hungrily, tasting yourself on his digit.

"Fuck, you're so hot." He groaned when you released his finger from your mouth with a pop. You moved his fingers back to your pussy, pushing them inside you.

“Ah fuck.” Mingi grunted as he shoved his fingers deep inside of you. “You’re soaking wet, baby. Fuck.”

He started moving his fingers in and out of you, gently circling your clit with his thumb. "You're driving me crazy, Y/N." He groaned. "I need to feel your sweet cunt wrapped around my dick."

"Me too, MIngi." You sighed. "Let's hurry this up so I can finally have you."

"Oh god, baby." He moaned as he kissed your shoulder. "You're so damn hot."

He pushed a third finger inside of you and you whimpered, feeling stretched out by the invasion. "You're so fucking tight." He groaned. "Damn, baby."

He slid a fourth finger inside of you, his thumb circling your clit. His other hand gripped your hips tightly, forcing you to lift your ass up slightly. As he pushed his fingers further inside of you, you moaned loudly, loving the way he filled you up.

He fucked you with his fingers in a steady rhythm. He kissed your shoulder and trailed his lips along your collarbone. "Tell me how you feel." He demanded.

"God..." You breathed. "Mingi, I can't..."

"You can, babe." He reassured you. "Tell me."

"It feels amazing." You panted. "Please, don't stop."

"Okay." He nodded, continuing to finger-fuck you. "Tell me more, baby."

"Oh god...Mingi...please..." You begged. "I can't take much more of this."

"Are you close?" He asked, trailing kisses across your jawline.

"God, yes." You cried out. "Please, don't stop, Mingi! Please! Ah! Fuck!"

"Oh shit, babe." He groaned, thrusting his fingers faster and deeper inside of you. "Come all over my fingers. Come for me, baby."

With his free hand, he cupped your breast and pinched your nipple lightly. He heard you cry out in pleasure and bit your neck, eliciting a yelp from you. He increased the pressure on your clit, plunging his fingers in and out of you as fast as possible. You screamed out his name as your orgasm ripped through your body. It seemed like an eternity before the pleasure subsided. You sagged limply against him, panting heavily. Mingi pressed a kiss to your shoulder, kissing his way upwards to your ear.

"How was that, baby?" He whispered.

"Amazing." You smiled, reaching for his hand and leading him to his bed. "And now I need you to fuck me. Be inside me."

He chuckled as he laid you down on the bed. He moved between your legs, parting them and spreading them wide. He gazed down at you, his eyes roving over your body. "Beautiful." He murmured.

"Mingi..." You whispered.

"Get on all fours, baby." He instructed. "Hands and knees."

You obeyed, bending over slightly so that your ass stuck up in the air. He grasped your hips firmly, holding you still as he rubbed his cockhead up and down your slit. "Baby, I'm gonna fuck you good tonight." He groaned. "Real good."

"Yesss." You moaned, digging your nails into the mattress. "Please, fuck me."

"Is this what you want?" He teased, gliding his cock along your slick folds. "Do you want me to fuck you good?"

"Oh god..." You gasped, closing your eyes and opening your legs wider. "I want you so bad. I want to feel you inside me. Give it to me, Mingi."

He groaned, burying his dick in your dripping wet pussy. You cried out in pleasure, feeling the warm friction of his shaft rubbing against your walls. He began to pump his hips, slowly pulling out of you only to push his dick deep inside again. "Oh, you feel so good." He groaned. "Perfect."

"Mingi, you feel so good. So big and warm." You moaned as he moved his hips back and forth, fucking you steadily. He leaned forward to grab your breasts, his lips trailing soft kisses down your neck. "Oh, fuck...I love how you feel inside me."

"Fuck, babe." He groaned. "Look at you. That's it, just like that. You feel so good."

"Fuck, your cock feels so good in me." You moaned. "God, please, keep doing that. Keep hitting that spot. Fuck me with your cock."

"Oh, yeah, babe." He groaned. "You really like that, don't you? I can tell. So fucking hot. You like getting fucked hard, don't you, baby?"

"Fuck, I love it." You gasped. "Please Mingi."

"What do you want, baby?" He asked.

"More." You moaned. "Please fuck me harder."

He slammed his dick into you, increasing the pace and depth of his strokes. You whimpered as he continued to move, pounding his dick inside of you relentlessly. He growled as he stared down at you, watching as your body arched and bucked beneath him. Your tits jiggled wildly as he continued to fuck you with abandon.

"Oh god..." You moaned, gripping onto the sheets. "Oh god, Mingi...oh god...oh god...Mingi, fuck me, fuck me!"

"Shit." He grunted, slamming into you harder than ever before. "Fuck, that's right. Yeah. Oh shit, babe. You’re taking me in so well."

He reached around to stroke your clit as he continued to pound into you. You threw your head back and let out a loud moan, your whole body quivering as you came. The orgasm caused him to jerk forward, pushing his dick all the way inside of you and leaving you breathless. "Fuck." He groaned, pumping his cum inside of you.

"Mingi..." You gasped, catching your breath. "That was...wow."

He pulled out of you and rolled you over so that you were on your back now. He kissed your neck softly, running his tongue along your skin. "Did you like it?" He asked.

"Yes." You answered, closing your eyes and smiling happily.

"Good." He grinned. "I knew you would."

"Mingi..." You breathed, shifting under him.

"I know what you want, babe." He said softly.

"Yeah? What is it?" You asked.

"Round two." He slid into you again, slowly and easily. "And then maybe we'll go get some food. Or sleep. Whichever comes first."

[nottsangel]

artrick who end up blackmailing camgirl reader that they know and will tell all their frat bros if she doesn't let them join on a live hehehegehehehejdjd 🔮

— artrick and camgirl!reader

ugh i love dark stuff like this…. patrick and art would be so sneaky with it though, you wouldn’t even realise they’re basically blackmailing you. they’d be so sly and manipulative, each in their own way.

like imagine getting ready, with roughly an hour left before going live again as you were finishing your make-up, already clad in a red lingerie set— a viewer favourite. staring at yourself in the mirror, lost in thought, you clumsily dropped your lipstick when loud knocks resonated through your dorm room, making you flinch momentarily. fuck. you cursed at yourself, instantly knowing it was your two best friends on the other side of the door, as they were the only ones you hung out with but god, their timing couldn’t be worse.

and when you opened the door after quickly putting on a silk robe, the atmosphere immediately felt… different? both patrick and art eyed you with dark, intense eyes, in a way you’d never seen before, and it made you extremely nervous.

“uhm… what’s up? sorry, but i don’t have much time…”

“we know you don’t.” patrick began as they both casually walked into your dorm room as if it was their own. “what? what does— what does that mean?” you gulped. what if they… no, no, they can’t possibly know… right?

“what patrick is trying to say, is that, uhm… we know about your… how do i say this… side hustle.” your eyes widened in an instant, heart pounding in your throat, making each breath a struggle. all the worst-case scenarios flashed through your mind, causing your breathing to quicken and your knees to weaken.

“oh… my god.” was all you could utter before both patrick and art rushed over to you when you began to panic, an expression of faux empathy on their faces. “hey, hey, it’s okay. it’s just us that know... for now.” patrick reassured you, muttering the last part under his breath as they both gently set you down on your bed, one on each side of you and both their hands resting on your bare thighs.

“how do you…”

“doesn’t matter how. what matters is that, others might see it, you know? like, our friends? i mean, you know how they are…” patrick moved his hand to your face, gently tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear, meeting your glossy eyes as tears welled up. “yeah… we all share the same laptop and we might, you know, forget to delete the browser history and they all would see the stuff you do on there…” art added, his hand inching closer to your cunt, causing you to instinctively spread your legs slightly wider as you tried to control your fast breathing.

“bet they would jerk off while watching you like fucking creeps. hand wrapped around their cocks as they watch you undress… or worse… they might share it with everyone. and soon the entire school would know about the things you do late at night, all alone in your little dorm room.” at this point, panic overtakes you completely as your hands clutch the edge of the bed so tightly that your knuckles turn white and you firmly bite your lip to stifle your sobs.

“shhh, baby, don’t worry. you know we won’t let that happen, right? i mean, we got a plan… but you gotta calm down for us, okay?” art cooed as he rubbed his thumb over your cheek to calm you down and wipe your tears. meanwhile, outside your vision, patrick eyed you lustfully as he bit his lip, feeling his boner grow at the sight of your red lace bra peeking out from your robe. you sniffed, feeling yourself gradually calm down at his reassuring words before nodding, desperate to end this nightmare.

“so uhm… how about you let us join, hm? that way we’ll make sure it’ll never get leaked. i mean… if we’re also involved, we’ll work extra hard to make sure no one else gets to see it, you know?” patrick explains, squeezing your thigh as his eyes shift from yours down to your lips. “yeah, yeah, then it’ll be just as much of a risk for you as it is for us… what do you say, baby?”

and without thinking twice, you nod eagerly while hurriedly wiping your tears with the silk sleeves of your robe, feeling happy and grateful to have such caring best friends who always look out for you… <3

ੈ♡˳

[skinnybritishdudes]

So, holy shit. I, a person who has not written fic in a good fifteen years, suddenly decided to take a crack at this prompt from my own post the other day. It's got a bit of flirty/confident Edwin, some catwin, jealous Charles, and smooching.

I don't have AO3 yet so I'm just going to (trepidatiously) post it here and hope for the best haha don't be alarmed by my extreme vulnerability

3500 words, teen rating, no warnings.

The Case of the Tempting Mirror

“Of course it isn’t dangerous,” says Edwin. He’s standing just in front of the mirror in the corner of the office, wearing the green sweater Charles associates with the day he saved him from Hell. He’s looking back at Charles with an infuriatingly relaxed smile, head tilted slightly to one side. “He wouldn’t hurt me.” 

“He’s not the only threat out there, is he?” Charles huffs. “We ran into loads of dodgy stuff in Port Townsend.”

“He’ll protect me,” Edwin says. “Honestly, you don’t have to worry. It’s only that I asked him to gather some plant samples for me and told him I’d be by to check on his progress. It’s for research, Charles, and won’t take a tick. Nothing to get so worked up about.” He takes a step backward toward the mirror.

“He’ll protect you,” repeats Charles, nodding sourly, his mouth a downturned line. “Alright. Go on, then.” 

“We’ve been over this before,” says Edwin, more softly. “I can handle myself, and–”

“Right, got it,” says Charles. “I said go, didn’t I?” He flops down on the couch, looking straight ahead into the room instead of at Edwin as he leaves.

Edwin nods with a small sigh. “I will not be long,” he says, and takes another backward step before turning in one swift pivot to walk forward through the mirror and out of the office. 

The moment he’s gone, Charles growls loudly, his hands becoming fists on his knees. 

The fucking Cat King. Again. Couldn’t they ever be rid of that wanker? The first time Edwin said he was thinking about popping back over to see him, Charles thought he must be joking. 

“He was kind to me about Niko’s death,” Edwin had said, looking down. “And I think he’s sad, you know. I find myself wondering if he’s alright.”

“If he needs a friend he’ll have to find someone other than you, mate,” Charles had said. “He’s trapped you before, and you said yourself he’s a trickster. You can’t trust him.”

Edwin had been completely sure he’d be safe, though, and he wouldn’t entertain the possibility of Charles coming with him. He’d been so stupidly stubborn about it, and they’d bickered until the argument was exhausted unless Charles was willing to escalate it into a fight. Though he was panicked and angry at the situation, he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. It felt desperate enough that he would be right to beg or threaten or shout if that’s what it took to keep Edwin safe, but he knew he couldn’t be Edwin’s best mate and also be the guy who tries to control what he does by threatening and shouting at him. If Edwin wouldn’t see reason, what could Charles do? He makes his own choices, in the end.

This was the fourth time. Each time with Edwin so irritatingly determined to go, so unmoved by Charles’ obvious visceral concern. Each time with the same tense mini-argument before Edwin swivels away from him so easily. 

Charles stands up, his hands still in fists hanging at his sides. He rolls his head around as if trying to ease tension in muscles that aren’t there, then begins pacing in long strides back and forth across the office. 

And Edwin says stuff like “just a tick,” and then comes back three hours later. Every minute of waiting is agony, with Charles never sure if he’ll be back in a moment or if this is just the beginning of a much longer nightmare. He never knows how long until it’s reasonable for him to be as afraid as he has been the entire time, at which agonizing moment his barely-contained panic might become appropriate. 

The most nauseating thing of all - if Charles could truly be nauseated - is the sort of lightness about Edwin when he gets back from his visits with the Cat King. He returns in a good mood, the subtle smile at the corner of his lips lingering for hours. It makes Charles want to hit something, and then he worries about himself over that urge. Not rational, is it? 

When Charles asks him what took so long, Edwin will say they got caught up talking. It isn’t that he was whisked away to some kind of time-warp space like the first time, he’s just hanging out with his friend the Cat King, on the other side of the world, and lost track of time because he wasn’t thinking about Charles at all. But he never gives much of an account of what they talked about that lasted hours, and Charles never feels like he actually understands what Edwin is doing over there. 

It’s like he can’t even bring himself to suspect the thing he suspects. It couldn’t be, could it? 

No. It couldn’t.

He growls in his chest again. Could it? 

Charles stops his pacing in the middle of the room, sighs again, and turns to look at the mirror. It could be hours more of this. Likely would, in fact. Part of him wishes Crystal were here to distract him and wonders if he should go find her, but a larger part feels like it’s appropriate for him to be here and agitated. He doesn’t want to be distracted from his worries about Edwin, he wants to address them. 

He takes two long steps toward the mirror, then sits on the edge of the desk facing it. As always, for a moment he wishes he could see his reflection, but even his memory of that image is foggy now. He hasn’t seen his own face in thirty-five years and can’t quite conjure the details. These days when he tries to imagine his own face, he sees Edwin’s, the only one with which he’s so intimately familiar. 

The mirror ripples, just subtly, sending waves through the reflection of the bookshelf behind him. He isn’t even touching it - not yet doing the thing he knows he shouldn’t do but is thinking about anyway - but the mirror can already feel him searching for Edwin and is responding to his anguish. 

Charles holds his hand up two inches from the glass surface, just suspended there for a moment like he’s stopping traffic. He can feel the energy of the mirror reaching out to him, and though he knows he really, really shouldn’t do this in the end he barely hesitates before letting his palm touch the turbulent surface. It clears almost immediately, showing Charles a dimly-lit bedroom he’s never seen before. The space is lit by lanterns and a tacky neon sign, shabby but with a large, round, satin-sheeted bed in the middle. Edwin is sitting at the head of the bed, cross-legged, his posture as sharp as ever but looking relaxed and at ease. The Cat King lays curled around him on the mattress, his head at Edwin’s left hand, his knees tucked up on the other side where Edwin’s right hand rests on his ankle. 

Charles watches as Edwin gazes down at the Cat King, his left hand moving to bury itself in the cat’s loose curls. They both smile, the Cat King slowly closes his eyes, and Charles feels like he’s choking. 

~*~*~

“You did very well,” Edwin murmurs, running his hand through the King’s hair slowly a few times before settling in to gently rub and scratch behind his ears. The cat’s purring vibrates the bed, the sound filling the room as he moves his head into Edwin’s touch, his body squirming against his legs. 

“Thank you,” sighs the Cat King. “Right now I can barely remember all the traipsing through the filthy woods I had to do to complete your little scavenger hunt so I guess it must have been worth it.” He rolls over just a little, enough to expose a wide strip of belly through the undone front of his velvet robe. 

“Your help is much appreciated,” says Edwin, his right hand moving up to rub the back of his knuckles lightly, gently across the Cat King’s presented belly. “And I’m happy to be able to give you something in return.” He turns his hand over to pet more firmly with his palm, adding some gentle scratches.

The Cat King sighs contentedly, arching his back a little against Edwin’s touch, then frowns. “You could just come and see me, you know,” he says. “Without making me do your little errands.” He flips over onto his side in one swift motion, propping his head up on his hand while Edwins’ fall away. The ghost quickly brings his hands back, clasping them in his lap. 

“I thought you liked making me happy,” Edwin says, teasing and earnest at the same time. “That is what you told me, is it not?”

It was rather lovely, actually, the first time Edwin had come back to see the Cat King. First, he was oddly touched to find the King had had mirrors installed all throughout his warehouse in hopes Edwin would come through one of them. But the way he smiled when he saw Edwin had radiated such genuine affection, it caught him off guard. There had always been games between them before, tension and fear and deceit. But when he stepped through the mirror this time, not even fully able to account for why he was doing it but feeling compelled, the strange cat-man smiled at him with the unguarded elation of a long lost friend. Edwin couldn't help but feel an unexpected tenderness toward him.

And then the cat had been so eager to please him. They had spent most of that first visit with Edwin perched on the pallet throne while the Cat King sat below him, rubbing against his leg while they talked. The purring was actually remarkably soothing and satisfying, and Edwin found he enjoyed it very much. Something else he found satisfying was the feeling of the Cat King being at his command; of having him bound the way he had once bound Edwin to this town. So he took advantage of it, to both their satisfaction. 

“Yes,” says the Cat King with another sigh. “I did say that. And I meant it, dumbass that I am.” He pouts. 

“The knowledge you gather for me is useful,” Edwin says. “And don’t I always give you the reward I promise?”

The Cat King makes a hmphing noise in his throat. “I do like the petting,” he says. “But it also sort of makes it seem like you wouldn’t come and see me if I weren’t useful.” He pushes himself up and in one graceful motion is sitting knees-to-knees with Edwin on the bed. 

“You could refuse the tasks, you know,” says Edwin. “I’m not forcing your will in any way, unlike what you did to me.” His words have an edge, but there’s still a smile at one corner of his mouth. 

“You’re manipulating me with your adorableness and it’s humiliating,” says the Cat King. “It is like a fucking magic trick.” His frown softens. “I mean, look at your eyes. How am I supposed to live?” He leans forward, gazing into them sadly.

Edwin quirks his head to one side. “My eyes?” he says. 

“They’re, like, unfairly gorgeous. You didn’t know that?” 

“Actually, I–” Edwin fumbles. “As a ghost, I can’t see my reflection or be photographed so I haven’t seen myself in a very long time. I barely remember my own features.” When he tries, he sees Charles’ instead. That rich, warm, inviting brown, so full of kindness and compassion.

“That’s tragic,” says the Cat King in a breath, laying one hand on either side of Edwin’s face. “They are deep, deep, magical green. And so soft and beautiful. You deserve to know.”

Edwin looks down, embarrassed. He feels fluttery, too, though. Light and jittery. He flicks his eyes back up to look at the Cat King. 

“Are you ever going to let me kiss you?” the cat asks softly, hovering close enough to Edwin’s face to deliver if given the go-ahead. 

Edwin grimaces, and the Cat King groans, pulling back. “Are you kidding? You are the worst!” He throws his hands up. “Aaand I love you. What a disgusting nightmare.” The Cat King grumbles, his hand moving to slash across Edwin’s lips before the ghost has a chance to react. A glittery gold mark appears on his mouth and Edwin recognizes this feeling, knows he will be forced to tell the truth to whatever the Cat King asks now. It felt like a violation before and does again, but it’s also a dizzyingly liberated feeling.

“What the fuck is going on with you?” asks the Cat King, too frustrated to formulate a more thoughtful question. 

“I love Charles,” says Edwin simply, as if that’s the entire story. He supposes it is. 

“I mean, duh,” says the Cat King. “Everybody knows that. But does he love you back?” 

“No,” says Edwin. He doesn’t feel compelled to explain further; the truth isn’t complicated. 

“Then what’s the difference if you let yourself loosen up with me?” 

“I don’t know,” Edwin says. “I want to, in a way. That is, I–I believe I could because Charles truly doesn’t love me that way and I am increasingly intrigued, you know, by all these new feelings. And you are certainly not Charles but I cannot deny that you appeal to me, and I find myself wondering what would happen if I did try to let myself go with you.”

“You should let go,” says the Cat King, moving close to Edwin again. “Eternity is a long time to fucking yearn, and I can help you with that.”

Edwin moves his head without thinking, just a little and just in the right direction to indicate receptivity, and the Cat King eagerly moves an inch closer, so ready but wanting to be sure. Then Edwin exhales in a way that sounds like surrender and lets his eyes close, and the King closes the gap between them. Edwin is surprised when pushes back and lets his mouth move, firm and curious. They kiss only for a moment, and Edwin feels it: a tingle, a warmth, something more visceral than the sweet, chaste kiss he shared with Monty. The Cat King purring into Edwin’s mouth causes his whole being to feel like it’s vibrating in a way that isn’t unpleasant in the slightest, and he finds that even without a body he can still shiver. 

Edwin’s eyes are half closed and dazed as they pull apart, the Cat King exultant but meaning to check that he’s still OK before going any further. As it turns out, he doesn’t have time to ask the question.

“That’s enough of that, then,” says Charles in a rough voice, twirling his cricket bat as he emerges from the mirror at the far end of the room. He advances in battle stance, feeling very sure something is going to get smashed to bits tonight and the Cat King will be lucky if it’s not his face. 

“Charles–” Edwin begins, shocked, with no idea what to say next. He would blush if he could, embarrassed to have been caught like this but also surprised by the surge of emotion he’s feeling at seeing Charles this way. 

Charles would not have been able to describe what he was feeling looking at Edwin in this moment, either–the sharp ache and the rage that had sent him hurtling through the mirror, the need that is swirling in his chest like fury. 

“Excuse me,” says the Cat King, turning to face Charles. “You are not invited to this rendez-vous and I will absolutely fuck you up.” 

“We’ll see who gets fucked up, mate,” says Charles. “Get away from him or I’ll–”

“Oh, are you under the impression he’s not enjoying my attention, Charles?” the Cat King purrs, eyes wide with mischief masquerading as innocence. “Look, he’s still got my mark on him, so he can’t lie. Edwin, didn’t you want me to kiss you?”

“Yes,” Edwin says, his voice emphatic but his face miserable. He sounds like he’s choking, and it reminds Charles painfully of that day on the stairs in Hell. “But only because I know that Charles won’t.” He gulps. “You were right, eternity is a long time and I’ve been longing more and more to experience–oh, do take this cursed thing off my mouth, please!”

The Cat King touches Edwin’s lips perfunctorily and the gold mark disappears. He then scoots away from him and stands, crossing his arms and turning away, stung. 

Edwin turns to look up at Charles, standing next to the bed beside him, and opens his mouth to speak.

“Edwin, do you want me to kiss you?” asks Charles, before he can decide what to say.

“Yes,” breathes Edwin without a beat’s hesitation. “But not if you–”

While Edwin is answering, Charles is climbing onto the bed, his long limbs surrounding him in an instant. He drops the cricket bat on the mattress beside them and takes Edwin’s face in both of his hands. 

“I think the fuck NOT,” says the Cat King, kicking the mattress hard with one foot and sending Charles and Edwin sprawling, almost falling off the other side of the bed. “You two will not be having your big romantic moment in my fucking bed, thank you very goddamn much. Are you fucking kidding me?” He points at Edwin. “Don’t you dare come back here, do you understand me? You take your scrawny ghosty boyfriend and your nasty teasing lying manipulating–”

Charles and Edwin scramble off the bed and move quickly toward the mirror, holding hands. 

“I truly did not mean–” begins Edwin as he passes the Cat King. 

“Fuck you,” the King interrupts. Edwin grimaces, his eyebrows knitting together in remorse. He gives the Cat King one last look, then follows Charles through the mirror.

“But let me know if you need anything,” says the Cat King pathetically, flopping back onto the mattress. “I love you,” he whines, and it turns into a meow as a plume of pink smoke envelopes him. He becomes a sleek black cat with green eyes, slinking slowly to the head of the bed to curl up in the warm spot where Edwin had been sitting. 

~*~*~

The moment they’re back in the office, Charles turns and advances on Edwin, arms outstretched to embrace him. 

Edwin takes a step back and then to the side, moving away. “Wait,” he says, one hand on his chest. “Let’s take a breath. What is happening here, Charles?”

“You said you wanted me to kiss you, didn’t you?” Charles feels a desperate kind of urgency but forces himself to slow down, and he gives Edwin a smile. 

“I did, yes,” says Edwin, straightening his posture and casting his eyes to the side, trying to compose himself, too. “But I know that your feelings are not the same as mine. You don’t have to pretend for me, you know, frankly the idea of that is–” he makes a sour face.

“That’s not it,” says Charles. He takes a step closer. “I’m sorry for spying on you. That wasn’t right, I know. But I wondered–I kept wondering what you were getting up to with the Cat King for all that time.”

“Oh? And that gave you license to invade my privacy, did it?” Edwin quirks an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth twitching. 

“It didn’t,” says Charles, his smirk becoming a bashful smile. “But I’m not perfect, and it’s what I did.”

“And you didn’t like what you found me getting up to, is that it?”

“Sort of,” says Charles. “But more like, I felt like I wanted to tear the Cat King limb from limb for touching you like that.” 

“A bit extreme, perhaps,” says Edwin, his face fighting desperately to crack into a grin. His exhilaration in this moment is palpable and thrumming, even without a heart to race.  

“Just a feeling, innit,” says Charles. “I wouldn’t actually have done it, of course. But it made me realize some important things.” He takes another step forward and reaches out to take one of Edwin’s hands in his, pulling him closer still. “Like how much I wanted to touch you like that. And that I didn’t want anybody else to, either. And once I knew it, of course I had to tell you, didn’t I? Especially since the alternative was watching you snog that creepy prick.”

Edwin doesn’t wait any longer, moving his free hand to the back of Charles’ neck and pushing himself up to kiss him with his joyfully irrepressible smile. Charles drops Edwin’s hand and winds his arms around his waist, pulling him in tight while Edwin wraps both arms around his neck. There is no room to regret that they don’t have skin to feel with as the explosion of love and delight reverberates all throughout their beings, crackling like electricity and unfurling like endless blooming vines. Like reality itself was exhaling in relief, the world becoming the way it was always meant to be. 

[11cupid-tarot11]

A Letter From Your Future Spouse

➽───────────────❥

1 -> 4

Cupid's Services Cupid's Master List Socials

Tips appreciated!

C@sh app and P@ypal only!

$minnieplant3

@janellec03

LOVE U

- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.

︻デ═一 ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Pile 1- Four of Wands, The Fool, Page of Swords, Nine of Cups, Page of Wands, The Wheel of Fortune.

"Hi you! I've been sleeping a lot, can't seem to do anything else lately because of how tired I've been. Finally. I can sleep as much as I want to now because of a situation that just so happened to end recently. Death.

What now? See, I've been wondering the same thing. But let's not even worry about it, let's just sleep as much as we want to because we finally can, even if it's only a little nap time out of your day do it because I gotta see you one last time later, I've got a message for you in your dreams. Spirit will tell you, don't worry about missing it or when <3

Resting so much so when I do have to work, you know, find that balance again between work and fun, I can focus on what's so important to me a lot better, I mean really give it my all... You know? Lol

Sorry, I dream a lot, you might notice my head is always in the clouds. I have very air energy like a Gemini.

Things are finally clearing up for me! I feel at peace, maybe we mirror each other and things are also getting better for you too? You have to let me know, okay? I feel like I can finally breathe again, be optimistic without being scared the rug is going to get snatched from underneath.

I've been working so so hard on my craft, putting in so much love and effort into my work and I feel really hopeful that all of my productivity will pay off soon, consistency is key, right?

I really like the color yellow, 😄 talk again soon!"

Hope you enjoyed! Don't forget to do the poll below 👇🏾 ✨

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Pile 2- Knight of Wands, I forgot to write down the rest of the cards I'm so sorry 😞

"I have no problem with putting in hard work for anything I want, even you, you know? If you don't want me the moment we catch eyes I'll make you ;)

The moment I catch you I'm going to make sure I never stop loving you, I'll make sure every day is beautiful, even on our bad days we'll kiss each other good night before bed still. I love you!

Why do you keep worrying yourself? All of that doubt in that pretty little head of yours isn't good, you should lay it all to rest before you make yourself sick baby. Sleep more, practice some self care before you run yourself crazy, okay?

I'm so proud of you, you know, for whatever amazing things you've accomplished lately. I believe in you, I'll always be your #1 cheerleader!

You should go out and celebrate! Enjoy the sun, you deserve it my angel! Promise me you won't let this go by like it's just not that big and you'll go out and do something? Pinky promise?

Stay focused! You're on the right path, you're doing amazing! I promise you, all of this will be worth it, it's worth our future 💓 keep going, I know you can do it! 🎉"

Hope you enjoy!!☺️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!

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Pile 3- Queen of Cups, Justice, Four of Cups, The Moon, Three of Swords, The Star.

" Hi my love, you know I don't talk a lot haha, so I'll make this quick as usual and get out of your hair so you can go on.

I just want to remind you, you're my queen, my favorite, my whole world ❤️ I think red looks really pretty on you btw but anyway, I love and miss you like crazy at times like these.

I am going through something right now, a legal situation, a situation I wish would come to an end right now because it's so heavy on me, it's hurting me but I know at the same time it's happening to me because it's part of my karma, something that's forcing me to look so closely at myself, at every shadow because I think it leads me to you. My everything. We're going to get married, I'm so sure of it.

I'm keeping hope alive, I'm hanging on to every thread of it I've got. I'm working on everything right now, I'll catch up with you soon sweetheart 💋 I'm going to kiss you when I do, you won't be able to get rid of me. ;) "

Hope you enjoy! Don't forget to do the poll below!!

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Pile 4- Ace of Cups, The Hanged Man, King of Wands, Nine of Cups, Knight of Cups, Nine of Wands.

"I want to come to you with amazing news but I can't, I'm sorry to say, I've taken a turn for the worst right now. Don't worry, it's temporary.

I am slowly building myself back up, that's what I'm doing right now if you're wondering what I've been doing all this time. I'm healing day by day and I hope you are too sweetheart. I might be a bit stuck and tangled up right now, but I'm clearing through it!

I'm the kind of guy who will pursue you with nothing but kindness until I make you fall for me with your charm, I'm cute, I know I am, you'll love me, I have curly light hair, and a really cute smile. You'll think I'm so adorable.

I want to offer my heart to you, fully, 100%. You have me, all of me as long as you give me you in return, I hope you do, I can't be without you once I know you.

Take care my love ❤️."

Hope you enjoyed ❤️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!

[thisapplepielife]

Written for the @corrodedcoffinfest June warm-up round.

Eddie Munson's Corroded Coffin Celebrity Full Metal Upside Down Memorial Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run 5K Race For Hunger

Prompt: Band on the Run | Word Count: 1000 | Rating: T | CW: Language | POV: Eddie | Pairing: Steddie | Tags: Future Fic, Middle Aged Famous Corroded Coffin, Established Relationship Steddie, Steve's Made Eddie Watch Too Much of The Office, Eddie Munson's a Runner, But Not Like This

"How did we get roped into this again? Who do I need to kill?" Goodie asks, lifting his leg into the air by the leg of his shorts, until Jeff catches his heel, resting it on his thigh as he ties Goodie's running shoe for him. 

"It's for charity," Jeff answers, cinching the laces, tying them.

Eddie's lacing up his own shoes, and he definitely shouldn't have bought new ones for this. Rookie mistake. He'd be better off with his vintage Reebok's that he wore into the ground.

He stands up and looks at himself in the mirror. He looks ridiculous. He doesn't know the last time his legs have seen sunshine, and they look like little chicken legs, under his baggy, black shorts.

This was a mistake.

Gareth is stretching, a foot up on the arm of the hotel couch, and Steve is all but laying over his back, pressing against him. 

"Um, do we need to let you two get a room?" Eddie asks.

Steve chuckles, and Eddie loves the sound. 

"You just want me to do this to you instead," Steve snarks.

"Well, yeah. Fucking, duh. Always, forever," Eddie answers.

"No, we don't have time for that," Jeff answers, looking at his watch, "it's twenty-three minutes until we have to be at the starting line."

"This is my worst nightmare," Goodie bemoans, "It's high school PE all over again."

And Eddie grins at him, because he feels exactly the same way. Goodie's hit it right on the goddamn nose. 

"Agreed," Eddie says, "and look, Steve Harrington is even here, bullying us freaks."

"I didn't bully you. You were the bully," Steve banters back, because they've had this disagreement a thousand times. 

"Agree to disagree," Eddie says, playing his part. Then he looks at Steve's back, still plastered to Gareth in a way that Eddie would definitely be jealous about if he were doing it to anybody else. "How much money is this raising, again?" Eddie asks, because that's the only thing that's gonna get him out of this room and onto the street. 

Steve straightens back up, "With what you've matched? Nearly fifty thousand dollars."

"That'll feed a lot of kids," Eddie says.

"It will. Your fans have really come through."

"They just want to see us in shorts," Eddie mutters.

"Well, that's at least ten thousand of it, yes," Steve says, and Eddie's pretty sure he's serious.

"Ugh, I'm gonna die," Eddie whines.

"You won't. It's a 5K, not a marathon. Over and done in under an hour, I promise, even if you walk the whole thing."

"I'm definitely walking the whole thing," Eddie insists. 

"And that's fine," Steve tells him, again. "But I'm not."

"And that's fine," Eddie mocks. 

"At least the route's along the ocean, so your casual stroll will have a view," Steve says, goading him.

He's still not running. He's walking.

Eddie doesn't walk. He's too competitive, and he should have realized that long ago. Goddamn Steve for getting him into this. 

So, when Steve, Jeff, Gareth and Goodie take off, Eddie matches them. So much for not conforming. He's embarrassed for himself right now.

Steve pulls away quickly, getting further and further ahead, and then Jeff and Gareth settle in beside each other, which leaves him and Goodie.

He thinks as soon as Steve totally disappears, Goodie will walk, and then he can walk, too.

Goodie doesn't walk. He's not fast, but he's in shape. They all are. Playing live shows like they do, even now in their forties, is more cardio than they even realize. So, they jog along together, and aren't even last.

"Are you dying?" Eddie asks, glancing over at Goodie.

"No," Goodie answers. 

"Me either," Eddie admits. 

Eddie was pretty sure he was gonna be last, and he's a little disappointed he isn't.

Steve is at the finish line, and doesn't even look like he's broken a sweat. Not a hair out of place, that asshole.

Eddie's drenched, and he feels like he just played a three-hour set in the sun. He and Goodie didn't finish fast, but they finished strong. And Eddie only stopped running to take a few pictures with fans along the route, as happy to get the breather as the fans were to get the picture, he thinks.

The volunteer hands the finisher's medal to Steve, letting him do the honors, and Eddie sees how hard Steve is smiling as he holds it up to put on Eddie. So, Eddie smiles back and leans his head forward to accept it, as cameras click all around. It's embarrassing, but he turns on the stage charm, bows and shows it off. Kisses Steve, lets them take pictures that all the tabloids will run with their own spin. Some good, some bad. 

Then, he poses with the rest of the band with the comically large check made out to the children's charity of their choice. 

It was worth it, he guesses.

"Rub my calves," Eddie demands, putting his legs in Steve's lap back in the hotel room, freshly showered, and already feeling more human again. 

Steve laughs, but he digs his fingers into the meat of Eddie's muscles, and they are a little sore. Goddamn new shoes.

"I'm proud of you, you know," Steve says.

"Yeah, yeah," Eddie answers, brushing him off.

"No, I am. I always am, but extra today. I know this isn't your thing, but you did a lot of good today. You all did."

"Yeah, well…"

"And got some great press," Steve adds, and now he's talking.

"Did I look good?" Eddie asks, preening, flipping his hair.

Steve grins, "So good."

And then Steve moves, lowering Eddie's legs back to the couch, settling on top of Eddie, covering Eddie's body with his own.

He presses his lips to Eddie's, then pulls back and looks in his eyes, "This mean you're gonna start going on my morning runs with me?"

And Eddie feels no remorse, as he laughs right in his husband's face.

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @corrodedcoffinfest and follow along with the fun! 🦇

Notes: Obviously the title comes from the Michael Scott's Dunder Mifflin... race name from the Fun Run episode of The Office.

[gretavangroupie]

Imber

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x Reader

Word Count: 21.5k

Warnings: Camping Jake, Cursing, Alcohol, Arguing, Pining, Angst, Severe Weather, Kissing, Graphic Sexual Content, Unprotected Sex, Fluff.

A/N: I had a thought and couldn't let it go. Special thanks to @gretavanmoon and @builtbybrokenbells for always supporting me and listening to my rambling voice memos. Love you both.

You watch as the familiar white Jeep pulls into your driveway, a cloud of dust filling the air as the car shifts into park. It’s only seconds before Clara is bounding out of the passenger door, running up to meet you on your porch.

“Clara���” you say, a suspicious look on your face.

“Josh said he wanted to tag along since he’s home…I couldn’t say no! Don’t be mad!” she whines nervously, knowing good and well this was supposed to be a girls weekend. 

You squint your eyes at her and let out a faux huff of annoyance, “It’s fine,” you say, sending her a playful smile.

“Are you sure?” she asks, bending down to help you grab your camping supplies. 

“Of course, Clara. I was just kidding around. You know I love Josh, and I know you hardly ever get to do stuff like this together. In fact, if you two want to just go, I can stay–”

“No way. You’re absolutely coming! Don’t start!” she shouts, slinging your duffle bag over her shoulder. “Let’s get you loaded up and on the road.”

The two of you spend the next few minutes organizing your things into the trunk, tetrising a few items until the trunk door would shut. You climb into the backseat, taking up residence next to the cooler packed with food for the weekend. 

“Hi Y/N! Thanks for letting me crash your camping trip!” Josh says, turning around in the driver's seat to flash you a smile. 

“Of course! I mean, if I knew that you were going to be home we could have planned like, a whole thing. It’s really no big deal. The more the merrier!” you answer, feeling Clara’s hand reach back to squeeze yours in thanks.

“Just a little break, only three weeks or so then we are back to it. Germany next,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows at you in the rearview mirror. 

You listen to him and Clara talk about the next leg of his tour, seeing the city start to taper off outside the car window. The trees are growing thick and the signs of humanity are next to none. 

“So where exactly are we going on this camping adventure, Clara?” you laugh, never really discussing a location in your earlier planning. 

“We’re going out to Leiper’s Fork, have you ever been there?” Josh answers.

“No, but I’ve heard of it!”

“Yeah, it’s a super cool little spot. Super secluded and gorgeous this time of year. Been out here a few times,” he says, letting his hand move to rest on Clara’s thigh. 

“How did you even find this? I feel like we are in the middle of nowhere!” you laugh, letting your eyes focus on the multicolored trees out the window. 

“Oh this is Jake’s spot. He’s always out here. Likes to come out here to write,” he pauses, turning to look at Clara. You can sense the nervous energy in his voice,  “He’s um, he’s actually going to be joining us.”

“Oh?” 

You feel a rush of panic wash over you. To say that your relationship with Jake was a bit rocky would be an understatement. You weren’t sure if there was ever really one thing that started it, one thing that made him dislike you so much, it just kind of evolved into what it is. You always seemed to find yourself in the same room as him, at the same parties with him, and attending the same shows, thanks to Josh and Clara. Though, neither of you ever bothered to speak to each other, let alone acknowledge the other's existence. It turned into an unspoken feud, filled with harsh whispers and judgemental glances, letting Josh and Clara be the buffer between the two of you. 

The thought of him joining you this weekend had you wishing you never agreed to the trip in the first place, and you know that they waited until you were this far out of town to break the news to you. 

“It will be fine babe, don’t worry. He will keep to himself like usual,” Clara says, sending you a guilty look. 

“Clara…”

“She’s right. He is different when we come out here. He might even be nice, who knows,” Josh laughs. It eases your anxiety just enough and you find yourself agreeing to this set up.

“Alright, it’s fine. I mean, it’s only two days anyway.”

–

The three of you spend most of the afternoon setting up your tents, wrestling the skinny fiberglass poles through the brightly colored fabric in fits of laughter. You took up shop beneath an old Oak tree, hoping it would provide a bit of shelter from the sun and the wind. Clara and Josh set up their tent just across from you, closer to the car and the fire pit. 

You organized your things in your tent, listening as Josh got chairs set up around the fire pit. He and Clara pulled the cooler from the car, tossing you a beer and as the sun started to dip in the sky, you talked about dinner and made plans for tomorrow's adventures. 

It was nearly sunset before you heard the rumble of tires as Jake’s Jeep pulled up to the campsite. You all snap your heads in his direction, seeing him jump out of the drivers side with a smirk on his lips. 

“Glad you could join us,” Josh teases. 

“Can’t rush these things,” he counters, nodding his head to Clara as a hello. His eyes flick over you and you watch as the expression on his face changes. His jaw tightens and his lips flatten into a thin line. A grumble of something leaves his lips in a whisper, and you don’t even have to hear it to know what he said wasn't pleasant. 

You look away quickly, turning your attention back to the vegetables you were cutting up for dinner. He turns back towards his car, gathering his things from the trunk as he continues to gripe incoherently. 

You focus on Josh and Clara, who are working on their own dinners, trying to keep the conversation flowing and ease the obvious tension. 

Jake tosses his things to the ground, preparing to set up his tent next to yours. You don’t dare tell him that it’s yours, and he doesn't dare ask. You continue to fill the tin foil with vegetables and meat, letting them marinate just long enough to get the fire started. 

“Jake, let’s go,” Josh says, motioning him over towards him.

“Go where,” he asks. 

“Need to gather firewood and I’m not making Clara carry it,” he says. Jake nods and gets up, jogging over to meet him. The two of them disappear into the thick woods, leaving you and Clara by yourselves at the campsite.

“This is going just great, wouldn’t you say?” you taunt, elbowing Clara from your camp chair. Her gaze is completely fixed on her phone, her eyes frantically flicking around the screen. 

“Hello? Earth to Clara?” you continue, still unable to break her away from her phone. 

She gets up and walks around, holding her phone to the sky in hopes of strengthening her signal.

“What's up, is everything okay?” you shout, starting to feel a little nervous. 

“Yeah, um, it’s fine. I think? I don’t know. I just got a weird text from my sister, and now I don’t have any service,” she says, biting at her bottom lip. 

“You can use mine if you want, I don’t know if my service is any better though. We are kinda in the middle of nowhere.”

“It’s– It’s fine. I think,” she says, sitting back down in her chair next to you. 

“Anyway, what were you saying? Sorry, I suck,” she says, turning to look at you apologetically.

Just as you go to speak you hear the crunching of leaves and sticks, and see the shadowy figure of the two men returning with an arm full of firewood. 

“Well, nothing now,” you laugh, motioning to Josh and Jake. 

“Oh, okay, later?” she asks, hoping you will fill her in. 

“Yes, later,” you mumble.

Josh and Jake step up, tossing the wood into a pile next to the fire pit. “That should be enough for two days,” Josh says, dusting his hands off on his jeans. 

Jake’s eyes meet yours, only for a second before storming off to his car. You shake it off and try to focus on Josh as he builds the fire in front of you, using an obnoxious amount of lighter fluid in the process. 

“Clara he is going to light us all on–”

Her phone ringing interrupts you, grabbing her attention as she rushes to answer it. She stands up and walks away towards the car, and you watch as her demeanor shifts into panic. Your eyes meet Josh’s, both of you feeling uneasy about whatever is happening on that phone call. She rushes back over to you, her face fear stricken and her hands visibly shaking. 

“Josh, we have to go! We have to go right now!” she shouts, frantically rushing around and grabbing things from inside their tent.

“What? Clara, what's going on?!” he asks, trying to calm her down. 

“Ashton! She’s going into labor! She’s on her way to the hospital right now! She wasn’t due until next week! I don’t know, I don't know! But we have to go right now!” she says, pulling out of his grip and continuing to grab her things and throw them in the car. 

“Oh shit! Okay, yes, yes we can go, um…” he pauses, looking over towards Jake at his tent and you sitting in the chair in front of him, “Fuck, um…Y/N, do you uh, want to come with us, or–”

“Shit, Y/N, I’m so sorry! I had no idea or I wouldn’t have– fuck, you should just… stay, enjoy the campsite and just relax. I’m so sorry I promise I will make this up to you!” Clara cries, her nervous energy transferring to you. 

It’s mere seconds before her and Josh are jumping into his car and pulling out of the campsite, abandoning their tent, their dinner and the rest of their belongings. 

Fuck.

You stand up from your chair, processing what exactly happened as you stare at the roaring fire. 

“Where uh, where did they go?” Jake asks, appearing from his tent as he hears the car peeling out of the campsite. 

You turn to look at him, shocked that he even spoke to you, while also realizing that now it’s just the two of you. Alone.

“They– Clara’s sister is having her baby. Early. They just…left– I–”

“Left?” he asks, “Like for good?”

“I…think so…” you answer, watching as he drags his hand across his face. The hem of his flannel lifts in the process revealing the tiniest peek at his tanned torso, so you quickly divert your eyes before he notices your staring. 

“Of course,” he gripes, kicking at the pile of firewood. He mutters something under his breath and you feel a wave of embarrassment at the thought of him dreading being around you this much. 

He huffs out a breath and turns to you, “Well, do you want to stay here or–”

“I mean, do you want to stay?” you question, shrugging your shoulders noncommittally. 

“I have no issue with staying. I know you were only here for them, so if you want to leave I promise it’s not going to hurt my feelings. I’m used to being out here alone anyway,” he says, his tone a little clipped. “Prefer it.”

“Are you going to be mad if I do want to stay?” you say, crossing your arms over your chest. You let your eyes meet his for a few seconds, both of you looking at each other as he thinks of his answer.

Again he rubs his hand over his face, shaking his head, “No, no I won’t be fucking mad– I just– Do you want to fucking stay, yes or no.”

“Yes.”

“Okay. Okay. Then we’ll stay,” he says, lowering the sound of his voice. His eyes flick around your face for a few seconds before turning to look at the fire. You can tell he is agitated, but when is he not?

“Jesus, he always uses too much fluid,” he gripes, turning his attention to the flames. “Pyromaniac.”

“Well, I guess we can throw these on?” you say, picking up the tin foil packets. 

“Yeah yeah, um, just set ‘em there,” he says, looking up to you from his crouched position next to the fire pit.

“Do you…want a drink or something?” you ask, feeling the awkwardness between you growing quickly. You can feel the hostility pouring off of him, and getting a drink seems to be you only escape plan.

“What’s in there?” he asks, looking over towards the cooler. 

“Beer?” you pause, “I don’t know, Josh packed it.”

“Whatever’s in there is fine,” he says, tossing the foil packets onto the flames.

You make your way to the cooler, grabbing two icy cans and returning to your chair to see Jake sitting in the one on the opposite side of the fire pit. You hand the can to him, seeing a side smile pull across his lips as he nods his head in thanks. 

“Got something stronger in the car if you want it,” he smirks, popping the tab on his can.

The small sliver of a smile nearly takes your breath away. “Oh, um, no this is good. Thank you though.”

It’s quiet between the two of you, both of you sipping at your beers as you watch the fire in front of you. You want to say something to him, start a conversation, maybe even chip away at his tough exterior, but you know that comes with risks. Risks you aren't willing to take while stranded in the woods for the next two days. 

It’s him though, that strikes up a conversation, but it’s not to make small talk, it’s to get answers. 

“Why do you even want to stay if Clara left?” he asks, bringing his can to his lips. 

You take a second to think about it, “Well, because I bought all this camping stuff, mostly. I’ve been looking forward to this little trip. I like being in nature, and I don’t get to do it often enough. Going in the woods alone as a woman isn’t exactly the safest either. So yeah, it sucks they had to leave but I’d rather be here than back at my place staring at my camping supplies sitting at my front door.”

“No other reason?” he asks, lowering his voice a little as he pokes at the foil packs with a stick.

You shake your head slowly, “Not that I can think of, no.”

He scoffs and flips the packets over before sitting back in his chair. You can feel him judging you, and the silence as he snickers at you confirms it. 

“Don’t be like that, Jake. You wanted to stay, too.”

“Yeah, but I come out here all the time. This is my damn spot,” he snaps.

“Well excuse me for intruding! I can call a fucking cab but I don’t think they will find me out here!”

“Jesus, relax,” he groans, “You know what? That's your problem. You’re too…you’re too uptight.”

“I’m uptight?!” you gasp, “What about you?! Mister, brooding misunderstood rockstar, can't stand to be in the same room as a person that doesn't fall at his feet and sing his praises,” you bark. 

“No, see, that's where you’re wrong. I’m not brooding or misunderstood. The people that I want to know me, know me just fine. I just don't put my feelings on display for everyone I meet. I have a certain way I like to live my life. And if that comes across as brooding and misunderstood, then so be it.”

“You know, you’re insufferable sometimes…” you grit.

“Well thank you for your input. I’ll be sure to put that in my diary later,” he snickers. 

“Do you have any respect for anyone?” you shout from across the fire.

“Of course I do. Those who earn it,” he says, raising his eyebrows. 

“You’re so–” you pause, grunting in frustration when you struggle to find the words.

“Sorry I have standards, sweetheart,” he says, taking another long pull of his beer. 

“Standards? What is that supposed to mean?” you shout, feeling yourself getting a little worked up. 

He glances up at you over the fire, “I don't let just anyone come into my life and get all up close and personal. You have to earn that. Which means my standards are a little higher than most.”

You cut your eyes at him, “Why are you like this? All cold and cryptic…I don’t even know what I did to make you dislike me this much.”

His eyes are dark and unyielding, his lips turning into a smile as he laughs, “I never said I dislike you. You just don't like how I present myself because it goes against what you’re used to. You're used to easy going guys, who let you do anything you want because you’re pretty. Not guys who are a little closed off and reserved. You don't want a little bit of a challenge.”

“Who said I even want you at all?” you bite back.

“You didn’t need to say it, sweetheart. You’re easy to read,” he says, sending you a smug grin. 

“Well, find a different book.”

“You’re also a smartass,” he says, leaning forward to pull the foil packets from the fire with a stick. He carefully opens up the hot foil, and checks them to make sure they are cooked through. His eyes flick up to yours, “Hungry?”

“Yeah, I am,” you say begrudgingly, leaning forward to reach for the foil wrapped food. You unroll the foil and reach for the plastic forks, offering one to Jake. He takes it with the raise of his brow, casually picking at the food in the silver wrap. 

“Explains a few things,” he mutters with a smirk. 

“Is this how this is going to be? Are you just going to dig at me all weekend until we go our separate ways?” you ask, starting to feel a little fed up.

“You tell me. Is that what you want?” he asks, biting a carrot from his fork. 

“No, I want us to just get along the best we can. I want this to be at least a little enjoyable.”

He looks at you for a moment and seems to soften a bit. “Fine,” he says, “So what would you like to talk about then, sweetheart?"

You roll your eyes at the pet name you’ve adopted, “I don't know, what do you enjoy talking about? Pretend it's not me. Tell me about life on tour or something.”

He nods and picks at his food, seemingly thinking for a minute before he speaks. “Well,” he begins, “The tour has been good, a few bumps along the way. We hit some bad weather in Huntsville that delayed one of our shows for a night, but other than that it was a good run. I think everyone is holding up fine.”

“What about you, though. Are you holding up fine?” you ask. 

He seems taken aback by the question. He looks at you with a surprised expression, almost as if it’s the first time someone has asked him about himself. He looks down at his food and is quiet for a moment before mumbling, “Yeah…I’m fine. Why?”

“I don't know, you just seem...agitated with everything lately. Every time I see you, you just seem quiet.”

He looks up at you again, holding eye-contact for a minute. He is tempted to deny it, to tell you everything is fine, but he doesn’t. Maybe there’s a part of him that wants to be honest with you. The other part terrified of letting you see through the walls he has worked so hard to build up.

“That’s just how I am,” he says quietly. He glances up at you and then back at the fire again, “That’s how I present myself. And it’s always been that way. It’s how people expect me to be most of the time and I don’t blame them. Most of my music is written about heartache and struggle whether personal or not. It’s everything I am. But I’m fine, sweetheart. I’m always fine.”

You shrug your shoulders, not wanting to pry anymore, feeling satisfied with the little bit he’s allowed you,. “Okay.”

The two of you eat in silence for a few more minutes, the wind starting to pick up, as the leaves rustle behind you. Jake seems to have softened a bit since your earlier banter, and you wonder if he is feeling a little guilty for his hand in the taunting. 

He looks at you again with a raised eyebrow, “What about you, then? Are you fine?”

He’s asking about you? 

“I mean, yeah. I think I'm fine. There are some things I wish were different, but that's life,” you offer, not wanting to delve too far into things. Not that he would care anyway. 

He seems a little taken aback with your response. Not that it surprised him that you have personal problems, but he wasn’t expecting you to be honest with him. Almost anyone else would have painted a perfect picture and made themselves appear significantly better than they actually were. There was a moment between you two when the only sound was the crackling of the fire and the chirping of Cicadas before he quietly spoke again.

“What do you wish were different?”

“Ahh, it’s nothing really. Just sometimes I wonder if I am where I am supposed to be. You know, the normal stuff,” you say, offering him a smile.  

He looks at you for a beat and nods slowly, seeming to take that in. “I don’t think anyone truly knows if they’re where they’re meant to be. One of the mysteries of life, I suppose.”

“What?” you nod, encouraging him to continue. “What were you going to say? You look like you wanted to ask something.” 

He suddenly looks uncomfortable, looking back into the fire and away from you. 

“It’s nothing.” He shakes his head as if dismissing whatever he was just thinking and stands up. He walks towards the treeline with an unreadable expression on his face, and you wonder what he could possibly be thinking. The wind sends a shiver through you, and you decide to grab the s'mores ingredients from the cooler before he comes back. If he comes back. 

He walks away, disappearing into the trees as he goes to relieve himself. He stands there for a moment, his breath coming out in visible puffs in the cool night air. He runs a hand through his hair, swearing under his breath as he replays your conversation. He hates that you can break him down so easily, that you seem to understand him better than he understands himself, and worse that you even care enough to ask. 

He zips up and turns to head back towards the tent, feeling frustrated and conflicted. He knows he's being unfair to you, knows that he's acting cold and distant for no good reason. But he can't help it. It’s all he can do. He doesn't want to get close to people, doesn't want to let them in. Especially not you. 

You work quickly trying to place the marshmallows on sticks, finding it to be a lot harder than you thought. With a little elbow grease and a dream you shoved the sticky blobs on the ends of the sticks, dangling them gingerly over the open flames. 

With both hands occupied it's hard to shield your arms from the cool wind that is dancing through your campsite. A chill rises to your skin despite the warmth of the fire. You quickly forget about it though as you see Jake reappearing through the treeline. He walks up with his hands in his pockets, his eyes studying you as you roast the two marshmallows. 

“What are you up to now?” he asks, raising a brow. 

“I mean…Roasting marshmallows, what do you mean?” you ask, confused as to why he was confused. 

His eyes roam over you and a small smirk appears at the corner of his mouth. He leans a little bit closer to study what you’re doing, laughing under his breath.

“You’re going to burn them, sweetheart.”

“No I’m not. I know what I’m doing, thank you,” you quip, rotating the sticks. 

He laughs and shakes his head, “If you’re not careful, you’ll end up with a mess of black, gooey, sugar.”

He moves a little closer behind you, until his chest is mere inches away from your back. His voice drops to a teasing whisper against your ear. “But, by all means, continue.”

If the goosebumps weren’t already taking up residency on your body, they would be now. He takes the chair next to you this time, instead of his previous one across from you. You don’t question it, and he doesn’t mention it, so you leave it at that. 

You watch as the marshmallows start to puff up, knowing they are done and ready to be put on the graham cracker, but that's when you realize you only have two hands, and this is in fact, about to go south quickly.

“Here, hand one to me,” he says, grabbing the stick from your hand. “Put that one together, and then do this one.”

You work quickly to assemble the marshmallow, chocolate and graham cracker, your fingers growing into a sticky, sugary mess as it starts to deflate. It’s melting the chocolate perfectly, and you think you may have just made the perfect s’more. The wind starts to whip a little harder, blowing your hair around your face just a little too much. Jake hands you the stick back, letting you assemble the other s’more, trying to push your hair out of your face with your wrist. 

From his spot next to you, you can feel his eyes on you. Watching you struggle, giggling a little under his breath as you fight through the mess of hair in your eyes. 

You place the chocolate on the cracker before trying to position the marshmallow on top, a huff of frustration falling from your lips as you push your hair back with the side of your arm. “Fuck,” you growl. 

You hear him laugh again, but this time it's accompanied with him standing up from his seat. You turn your head and watch as he pulls a black hair tie from his finger. His fingers brush against your neck for a moment, gathering your hair into his fist and pulling it up into a quick ponytail. It is an unexpectedly sweet and careful gesture on his part, taking you completely by surprise. 

He steps back and looks over you, now with your hair out of the way. “There,” he says, taking his seat once more.

“Th–thank you,” you squeak out, still reeling over the feeling of his hands on your skin. 

There is a beat of silence between you where he just looks at you. His eyes drift from your face down to your fingers and the gooey mess you had created from assembling the s’mores. 

He suddenly snickers,“You’re a mess, sweetheart.”

You shrug your shoulders and offer him the perfect s’more, reaching for your own and sinking your teeth into the melty goodness. You were right, it was perfect. Probably the best you’d ever made. Screw him for saying you were going to burn it. 

You turn to look at him, ready to see his reaction to the perfectly made treat. He bites into it, staring at the fire as he chews, swallowing down his first bite before he turns to you. 

“You know, I kind of hate these,” he smirks. 

“What?” you ask, taking another bite. 

“I never have liked them. My whole life, really.”

“Then why– Why are you eating it? You didn’t have to eat it,” you say, suddenly feeling guilty. 

“I dunno. I want to. I guess ‘cause you made it for me.”

You feel your heart drop into your stomach, watching him intentionally take another bite as he settles back in his camp chair. There is a new tension floating in the air now, it's less uncomfortable and more heavy with things unsaid. 

He turns to look at you again, his face glowing in the orange fire light, “It actually isn’t terrible. I will admit.”

“So what you’re saying is that you love my cooking?” you tease.

He laughs, as he swallows his last bite, “Well, I didn’t say that. The fact that you call this cooking is questionable.” His tone is teasing, and you watch as he licks a dribble of chocolate from his thumb. It causes more of a reaction within you than you ever anticipated, and again you thank the wind for causing the goosebumps. 

“I think I have some paper towels  in the car, I’ll be right back.” he says, standing and walking over to his car. You can hear him digging around in his trunk as you stare off at the trees in the distance, trying to make any sense of the feelings rushing through your body right now. Why is he sort of sweet? Why is he sort of really sexy when he’s not being an asshole?

A flash in the trees catches your eye, snapping you from your thoughts and raising your blood pressure. You stare intently, watching for it again, hearing Jake approaching from your left. You see the flash again, accompanied by two others, and a smile crosses your face. 

Jake steps up behind you, tossing a thick flannel in your lap as he takes his spot next to you, offering you a handful of wet wipes to clean your sticky fingers. You glance down at the shirt laying across your legs and turn to him in surprise.

“Noticed you were cold, that's all.”

You clean your hands the best you can before sliding the thick flannel shirt over your arms, letting the warmth and the smell envelop your senses. This was not helping with the thoughts you were having a few minutes ago. You turn your sights back to the trees, watching the little orbs buzz around overhead.

“Fireflies…” you whisper, watching a few zaps of yellow buzz around in the old Oak trees.

He hums as he sees them light up, “They are in all of the trees out here. One of my favorite things,” he admits.

“Jake?”

He turns to look at you, nodding for you to continue. 

“Why do you come out here alone all the time?” you ask, genuinely curious. 

His expression darkens slightly as he hears the question, and he is quiet for a moment before answering. “It’s just peaceful I guess,” He shrugs and looks out into the darkness of the trees instead of you. “Not everyone is cut out to be around people all the time.”

“You don’t ever get lonely?”

A beat of silence passes and he glances back at you. This time, his usual smirk has disappeared and is replaced by a more serious look. He doesn’t answer the question, but there is a look in his eyes that makes you think maybe he is more lonely than he wants to let on.

“I’m comfortable with my own company,” he says quietly. The fire is still smoldering in front of the two of you, the flames gone now, leaving a pile of glowing embers snapping and popping as they work to extinguish themselves. 

You pull the sleeves of his flannel over your hands, catching his attention and pulling a tiny smirk to the corners of his lips. He swallows hard, his Adam's apple bobbing as he tries to focus on the fireflies again. It feels nice sitting with him like this. Just talking, no witty remarks or snappy comebacks. Just two people, talking. 

“Don’t you ever wish you had someone to share this with, though? Your spot?” you ask, giving him a playful grin.

He watches you for a moment, considering the question. There is a part of him that wants to be defensive and cold, shutting you out and telling you he doesn’t want that. But the look in your eyes and the softness of your tone tells him he can’t lie to you about this. He breaks eye contact momentarily, his gaze falling downward to his hands in his lap.

“Sometimes…” he mumbles under his breath. 

You aren’t sure why, but that goes straight to your heart. Sure he said he was fine earlier, but now you’re starting to see that maybe that isn’t completely true. It’s quiet for a moment, and you spend each second gathering up the courage to continue the conversation.

He glances at you again, this time having a look on his face that says he wishes he hadn’t confessed that to you. He suddenly becomes much more uncomfortable, trying to cover it up by acting nonchalant, adjusting his position in his chair and fidgeting with the fire. He clears his throat and looks to you again, “It’s late. We should get some sleep.”

It catches you off guard. Him not only abruptly ending the conversation, but the rest of the evening. You know he is right, you probably should go to sleep, but part of you feels like the conversation is unfinished, and you think he knows that, too. 

“Oh, um, okay. Yeah, you’re probably right.” you say, standing from your chair with a stretch. You can feel his eyes on you, burning holes into your skin. “Is the fire going to be okay?”

He laughs a little, nodding his head, “Yeah, yeah. Just embers now. It will smolder out in an hour or two,” he says. 

You nod your head and pull your flannel covered arms across your chest tightly. You start to make your way over to your tent, your mind flooded with the vision of him just moments ago, soft and glowing in the firelight. You look back at him, still standing at the fire, watching you walk to your tent. He nods with a smirk and starts walking toward his own tent. Before going in, he looks back at you, his eyes meeting yours.

“Night.”

“Night, Jake,” you answer, reaching for the zipper. He nods and watches as you step inside, waiting until you’re safely inside before he lets out a deep sigh.

He can’t quite put his finger on why he suddenly feels so off-kilter. You’ve shaken him in a way no other has been able to. There was something about that conversation earlier, you asking what he wanted. How he was doing.  How he feels. The way your features softened as you listened to him and made him want to tell you the truth. He didn’t like how it made him feel, like every falsity he had built up about you in his mind was exactly that. He had spent so long pushing you away and talking you down to himself that now, here, where he can’t escape you, he is faced with the fact that you’re exactly the girl he thought you were, and everything he has always known deep down is true.. 

Inside your tent, you rummage around in your duffle bag looking for something to sleep in. As you pull an old t-shirt from the bag you pull his flannel from your body, setting it aside while you change. You don’t know why, but you find yourself reaching for it again and layering it over your shirt. You pull it to your nose to breathe it in now that you’re alone in the confines of your tent. It smells of smoke and tobacco, a sweet earthy undertone pulling you into its spell as your eyes flutter closed.

You can hear him zipping his tent, the faint glow of his lantern casting a shadow of his figure against the tent fabric. You hear the buckle of his belt as he pulls it from the loops on his jeans, and you do your best to look away. But with the smell of his cologne invading your senses, you claim temporary insanity and watch as his shadow pulls his shirt over his head and slides out of his jeans. You swallow heavily as you watch his shadow settle down into his sleeping bag and turn off the lantern.

You do the same, turning off your headlamp and getting inside your sleeping bag, doing your best to get comfortable. Even though the air is warm, the ground is cold and you shiver slightly.  It’s difficult to get comfortable in the new environment and you find yourself rolling over and shifting around a lot, almost matching the state of your brain. Eventually, the sound of the cicadas lure you to sleep, and as your eyes shut it's a soft, fireside Jake that is on your mind. 

—

The birds chirping in the tree above you wakes you. Your eyes crack open and you immediately notice the cool chill in the air. You sit up and yawn, stretching out your limbs and buttoning the buttons on the flannel for a little extra warmth. As you step outside of your tent a cool fog envelops you, causing you to shiver. You see a small fire has been built in the fire pit already, so you gather that Jake is already awake.

You make your way to your camp chair, noticing it has been wiped of the dew already, and is ready for you to occupy it. Your eyes search the foggy landscape for any sight of him, finding him standing at the tailgate of his Jeep fiddling with something. He catches sight of you, and nods, motioning that he will be over soon. 

Minutes later he is approaching with two camp mugs filled with what you can only assume is coffee. The steam is swirling from the tops of the mugs blending in with the fog surrounding you. 

“Morning,” he says, offering you the blue speckled mug. 

“Morning,” you smile, accepting it from his hand. “You have all the accessories, don’t you?”

He smiles, and nods gently, “I’m very serious when I commit to things.”

“Oh, is that right?”

“It is.” His gaze travels over you for a moment. He can’t help but appreciate just how good you look in the morning. The messy hair and the sleepy expression, combined with his flannel, you’re practically driving him insane.

“Do you think we will be able to see the sunrise through the fog?” you ask, sipping at the black coffee.

He squints thoughtfully out into the fog, taking in the thickness of it. He can’t see anything through the haze and honestly doubts you will be able to see much of anything.

“Hard to say,” he shrugs. “Depends on how long it hangs on.”

You nod in understanding, returning to the quiet morning, listening to the chirping of the birds in the distance. “You know it is really beautiful out here, I see why you come out here.”

He smiles a little, appreciating your change of attitude from last night.

“I thought you’d like it,” he said with a hint of a smirk. He glances back out into the fog where everything is hazy and unclear. “It’s nice and quiet here. No one around for miles, other than us of course. I like that best of all.”

“You know, I might even come back here one day,” you smile, feeling your chest grow warm at his last words. 

He suddenly looks surprised that you’re considering returning. He usually had a comeback for anything you said, but for this, he was quiet for a moment, considering your words.

He glances around at the surrounding area, the trees and shrubs all covered in the dense fog. He feels almost defensive about you seeing this place as beautiful. It was his place, his special place, and he wasn’t sure why he felt so weird that you were appreciating it. He falls silent for a moment as he watches you enjoy the surroundings, sipping the coffee he made for you as you sit in his flannel. The peaceful look on your face as you look out into the fog causes his chest to feel warm. He would never admit it, but he wants to bring you back here as often as you want to come.

He clears his throat and looks back at you. “Maybe we can take a walk before it clears up.”

You can feel the blush creeping up your chest, your cheeks burning at the thought that he might actually want to spend the day with you. 

“Yeah, I think I’d like that. Anything cool to see out here?”

He takes a moment to think, rubbing his fingers against his lips, “There’s a pretty decent hike to a creek not too far, we could go that way. Only if you’re not scared of a little wilderness along the way,” he smirked.

“I’m not scared,” you answer, raising a brow in challenge. 

“You bring a bathing suit?” he asks, tipping back the last of his coffee.

“Of course,” you laugh. 

“Good, I’ll meet you back out here in say, fifteen?” he says, standing from his chair.

You nod and both make your way back to your tents, changing into your bikini that you fully did not prepare to wear in front of a man, let alone Jake. You pull a pair of denim shorts and a cut off tee over top, grabbing your hiking boots and your backpack as you make your way back out to the camp chairs. 

Jake is still in his tent, so you use the time to lace up your boots and pack a few snacks into your bag. It’s not long before Jake is stepping out, in a pair of red swim trunks and a black button down, barely hanging on to his tan frame. It seems a strange ensemble for hiking, but he is unlike any other man you knew, and it kind of just fit.

He joins you at the chairs, putting on his own hiking boots. You feel his hand reach over to check the tautness of your shoestrings, grabbing your attention. 

He looks up at you from his bent over position, “Just making sure they are tight enough, don’t need you getting blisters before we even make it to the trail head,” he smiles. 

With your bag packed and your sunglasses perched on your nose, the two of you set off into the treeline, leaving your camp behind in search of adventure. You head down the winding trail that is lined with overgrowth on either side. You can tell that not many people walk this path, and you wonder how Jake even found it in the first place. The thick brush and branches scratch at your legs as you trudge on, but you welcome it. This is what you wanted, after all.

He walks just a step behind you, watching your feet as you walk along the trail. He can’t help but notice how your legs look in your denim shorts, and he does his best not to stare. Not that you would notice. 

You turn around to look at him, noticing him a few strides behind you, “You gonna keep up with me Kiszka?”

He scoffs playfully, a bit miffed at that comment, “I’ve walked this trail a hundred times, pretty sure I can handle it.”

He takes a few quick steps to catch up to you, walking next to you now rather than a few steps behind. His shoulder brushes against yours as he walks, catching you both by surprise. 

“Why am I leading the way anyway if you know where we are going?” you tease. 

He scoffs and rolls his eyes, “You’re not ‘leading the way’ sweetheart, I’m guiding you.”

You huff in annoyance, “Guiding me? I’m not a dog…”

He smirked, thinking about how you definitely weren’t as obedient as a dog. You were much harder to control and a hell of a lot more stubborn.

He suddenly snickered and said, “Never said you were, I just don’t trust you not to wander off.”

“And go where? You’re all I’ve got out here!” you giggle, the words leaving your lips before you consider the weight of them. 

He snickered again with amusement, though his heart skipped a beat when you said that. You were all he had as well. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his swim trunks as he walked next to you, avoiding any more of the shrubs that were trying to grab onto him.

“There’s plenty of places to get lost around here if you wander off the trail. That’s why I’m making sure you don’t drift away too far.”

“Why would I want to?” you ask, a hint of flirtation evident in your tone.

He picks up on your flirty tone, letting a smirk pull across his lips. He glances over at you with a look in his eye as he registers what you meant by that comment.

“If I didn't know any better I would say you're enjoying spending time with me, sweetheart.” 

“Don’t flatter yourself, Jacob,” you quip. 

He snickers and glances over at you again, seeing that look on your face he's all too familiar with. “I don’t have to flatter myself, sweetheart. You’re the one getting all flirty.” He grins.

“Flirty? I’m not being flirty,” you lie.

He snickers again, seeing through your lie immediately. “You have a terrible poker face,” he says. He walks closer to you as he speaks, his leg brushing yours as you walk. 

You feel a chill run down your spine at the contact and you wonder if he feels it too. You decide to change the subject, worried that this conversation may have you backed into a corner. 

“Tell me how you learned to play guitar so well,” you ask, hoping he will be willing to accept your topic change. 

He lifts his gaze to the trees as he contemplates your question. He hadn’t thought about it in a while, but he still remembers those nights all too well.

“Practice, mostly. Spent hours and hours alone in my bedroom just practicing until my arms were sore and my hands locked up. But how do you know that I play well? You watch me, sweetheart?”

You roll your eyes, letting your hands push away a few branches, “I mean, you have to play pretty well if you're selling out arenas…”

He lets out a scoff and a smirk. He was used to people complimenting his skill but for some reason, hearing you do it makes him feel a little flustered.

“I suppose so, but you didn't answer my question,” He chuckles.

“What, have I watched you play? Of course I have. I've been to a few shows with Clara.”

He seems surprised by your confession. In that moment, he begins to wonder how many times your eyes have sought him out through the lights and over the crowd.

He clears his throat and says, “Clara dragged you out to them?”

“No, I went willingly,” you admit. 

There’s a moment of silence as he processes what you just admitted. For some reason, the thought of you going to one of his shows because you wanted to go was making his heart pound a little harder in his chest.

He looks at you with a smirk to mask how thrown off he was by that.  “How come I never saw you backstage?”

You look at him with a confused look, "Did you ever look?"

Something about that question stung. The way you said the words so casually felt like a knife through his chest. He shakes his head as he responds, “No. No, you weren't there. I would remember.”

“You're right. I never went back with Clara after the shows. Didn't want to put myself in that position. I mean, that's your space, ya know? And you and I can barely be in the same room together. We haven't even had a civil conversation until, well, right now.”

He stays silent for a moment, processing your confession. After a minute he sighs and runs a hand through his hair, “I never wanted it to be like that sweetheart.”

You huff a laugh, “Your actions over the last, oh I don’t know, two years have shown otherwise.”

He grimaces when you say that, knowing that you’re right. He knows he has been a jackass to you, but for some reason hearing you confront him about it was causing a strong pang of guilt to flare up deep within his chest. He tries to shrug it off and maintain his cool, but even he can’t deny that your words were hitting him right where it hurt. 

The two of you walk for a few moments in silence, the only sound being the crunch of branches and twigs under your feet. He glances over at you, watching the way your face looked as you focused on where you stepped along the path, and he suddenly blurts out a question.

“Why is it so easy for you to make me feel guilty?”

What?

You snap your head to look at him, “I don’t know, you tell me?”

He lets out a scoff and shakes his head, pushing a limb out of the way to let you pass. “You’ve just got this way of bringing out sides of me that I don’t understand,” he grumbles.

“What do you mean?” you ask, feeling a wave of nerves wash over you. 

He falls silent as he considers how to explain what he means. It’s a hard thing to describe. It’s more than just the way you make him feel things he doesn’t usually feel around other people. It’s more than just the way you look at him, or talk to him, that makes his heart beat harder. It’s more and he knows it.

“It’s nothing, nevermind,” he pauses, “We’re here.”

You decide to let it slide, not wanting to push him into a bad mood. The two of you walk up to the edge of the rocky creek, taking in the sights. There’s a small waterfall trickling over the rocks to your right, leading out into a swimming spot and you almost moan at how appealing a dip sounds after that hike.

Jake stands just beside you, his gaze skimming over the water. He takes in the rushing sound of the creek as it flows past the large rocks and branches. He’s secretly looking at you out of the corner of his eye, watching you stare out at the creek just like he did the first time he saw it. He takes a moment to just watch you. The way your hair looks in the sunlight is catching his eye, the way your lashes flutter as you blink, the look on your face that’s soft and calm. Watching you out here in this setting is making all sorts of different emotions swirl around inside him, but he just can’t bring himself to name any of them.

“This was worth the hike,” you say, turning to meet his gaze. 

He keeps his eyes on you as you admire the creek. The way the sunlight dances against your skin makes you look as if you’re glowing. He can’t pull his eyes away from how goddamn good you look and how peaceful you seem despite everything that had happened between you two.

“Yeah. I suppose it was worth it, wasn’t it?” He agrees reluctantly.

You pull your shirt over your head, leaving you in your bikini top and shorts. You know you want to jump in, but you will wait for him to go first. 

He’s completely caught off guard by your actions, his eyes growing wide. His gaze instantly travels down to take in your bare torso, raking over your skin and lingering for just a beat too long. He immediately clears his throat and looks away, shifting uncomfortably as he feels an unfamiliar pang of heated desire in his stomach.

“You ready to swim?” he asks. You unlace your boots and leave them on the embankment, turning to look at him as he does the same. 

“Very,” you say, nodding towards the water.

He takes a moment to compose himself and avoid staring at you while you are basically half-naked. He pulls his own shirt over his head, revealing his tanned chest and arms, and sets it down beside yours on the bank of the creek.

He dips a toe into the water cautiously to test the temperature. It’s a bit cold, but it feels refreshing on his skin after all the walking you had done to get here.

“Good, let me show you why we really came here,” he says, motioning for you to follow him up a footpath. You quickly kick off your shorts and follow after him, curious as to where he is taking you. As you reach the end of the small dirt path your eyes land on the old rope hanging from the branch of an Oak tree.

“No, no way,” you stammer. 

A mischievous smirk quirks up on his face as you look at the rope. He can tell that you’re nervous just by the look in your eyes. But he would be lying if he said that he didn’t find it cute.

“Oh come on, what happened to ‘I’m not scared’?” he teases. 

“I’m not! But this is different!” you whine. 

He walks up to the rope, grabbing a hold of it and giving it a few solid pulls to test how sturdy it is. He glances over his shoulder at you to watch your face, seeing the anxiety there in your expression.

He smirks and motions towards the creek below him, “See that spot down there? It’s perfect for jumping. It’s safe. I’ve done it a hundred times. I promise.”

“I don’t know,” you say, biting at your bottom lip. 

He grins as he watches you bite your lip. Seeing you looking so nervous and cute was making his heart twist. He steps closer to you, still holding the rope in his hands. He smirks and cocks an eyebrow. “I’ll go first, okay?”

You nod and watch as he wraps his hands around the brown rope. He turns and looks back at you with an excited expression, “I’ll see you down there?”

“Okay,” you murmur, watching as he gets a running start and flies through the air before dropping down into the creek with a splash. You run to peer over the edge, watching him come up from the water with a shake of his hair. He smiles and waves you down, practically begging you to join him. 

“Come on, you can do it! I–I’ll catch you! Promise!” he shouts, “Jump, sweetheart!”

You let out a deep breath, gathering all your courage as you wait for the rope to stop swinging so you can grab it. As you reach for it you hear him cheering, still floating in the water where he landed. 

“Jump!” he yells, smiling up at you as he treads in the water. He grins as he watches you dangle from the rope, nervous to let go and jump into the water. “You’re gonna be fine! Just let go and I’ll catch you. I promise,” he yells.

With that you run, jumping off of the rock with the rope clutched tightly in your fists. Time almost seems to slow down when you jump, your body floating through the air and for a moment, it feels exhilarating.

“Let go, now!” he shouts, and so you do.

Jake waits with his arms open wide, watching as you fall down towards him from above. He can see the mixture of fear and courage on your face as you plummet towards him. He braces himself as you fall into his arms, catching you as best he can in the deep water. He pulls you close to him, his hands gripping your bare waist as your bodies press together. He can feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins as he holds you, your chest against his and your faces just inches apart. He can feel your heart pounding as he looks into your eyes.

The moment you’re in his arms, something within him snaps. All of a sudden, everything feels heightened. The feel of your body against his, the way you’re looking at him, the sound of your breathing as it slightly catches in your chest. The air between you seems almost electrified and he can feel the tension brewing in his gut.

“You caught me,” you breathe, recognizing just how close the two of you are. 

He can’t help but smirk and let out a low chuckle, still holding you against him. “I told you I would.”

You can feel your body pressed against his, the wet fabric of your bikini sticking to your skin. It’s making your brain go fuzzy and your skin tingle in a way you can’t explain.

“Thank you,” you whisper, neither of you making a move to let go of each other. 

He swallows, the tension between you feeling almost palpable. His pulse is pumping, and his breath catches in his throat as he holds onto you. He wants so badly to press you against him further and hold you tighter. Closer.

He couldn’t help glancing down at your lips, his gaze drifting down from your eyes to linger there just for a moment. You let your tongue dart out over your lips, swiping away the water dripping over them. 

He lets out a low, deep breath as he watches you. That small action has his heart racing even more, and every instinct inside him telling him to bring you closer. To claim your lips with his and taste you.

“You’re playing a dangerous game, sweetheart,” he whispers in a hoarse voice.

“Dangerous for who?” you question, biting on your lip.

He raises an eyebrow and chuckles, his grip on your hips tightening just slightly. He pulls you in closer, and you know he can feel your nipples hard and wet against his chest. Your bodies are pressed flat against one another, the cool water from the creek dripping down from your skin and onto his. He can feel your heart pounding against his chest and his pulse thrumming in his veins. 

He leans his head down so that his lips are mere millimeters away from yours and whispers huskily, “You. For you, sweetheart.”

Suddenly he releases his grip on you, swimming on his back further down the creek. Your heart is still racing in your chest from the contact. You felt something just now, and you know he did too. You feel a sick feeling in your chest at the loss of his touch. You tread water for a moment as you watch him swim away, feeling the coolness of the water against your skin and the sun beating down above you. Your mind is racing and you’re trying to process all of the different emotions and sensations that he stirred up within you just now.

Jake turns, breaking the surface to look back at you. “You coming?” he calls out to you with a smirk.

You nod, starting to swim towards him, taking notice of the smile on his face and the small dimple in his cheek. For some reason you feel the need to be close to him, you want his hands on you again, and you think maybe he does too.

He watches as you swim towards him, your body moving gracefully through the water. He can feel his heart rate increasing as he watches you approach, and he has a sudden urge to reach out and pull you against him. But instead, he composes himself and continues to tread water as you swim up to him.

He grins as you get to him, his gaze drifting over your body. “Took you long enough,” he teases.

“Where are you taking me, anyway?” you taunt, treading water next to him.

He chuckles and shakes his head, “You ask a lot of questions, you know that?”

You shrug your shoulders in the water, and with that he spins around and starts swimming further down the creek, moving towards a more secluded area. He glances over his shoulder at you as he swims, making sure you’re following him. He swims over towards the bank, pulling himself up on a collection of flat rocks. It’s a nice shady spot, and you can tell the rocks will be warm to the touch. 

He looks back at you, extending his hand to help pull you from the water. You take it, letting him pull your wet body up onto the rocks with him. He keeps hold of your hand for just a moment longer than necessary, hoping you didn’t notice, but of course you do. 

“This,” he pauses, “Is my favorite place.” He grins and motions for you to sit down, taking a seat himself. Once you’re settled, he looks out at the creek that flows past you. 

“I found it a long time ago. No one’s ever here. It’s like a little hidden treasure, I don’t even know if anyone else knows it’s here,” he says with a smile. “Actually, you’re the only person I’ve ever shown this to.”

“What? No one else?” You question. 

He shakes his head, chuckling a bit. “No one. It’s my little secret hideout.” He looks over at you and grins, his eyes taking in your figure sitting next to him. “I guess now it’s our secret hideout.”

“Oh, ours now, huh?” you tease, turning to look at him as the sun hits his cheeks. 

He laughs, his eyes still wandering over you, taking in the way the water is dripping down your sun kissed skin.

He takes a deep breath and nods, “Yeah, ours. No getting out of it now,” he says with a smirk.

You decide to push the envelope a little, swallowing nervously as you speak, “Wasn’t really planning on it.”

He grins, his eyes lighting up with mischief as he hears your flirty tone. He shifts his body towards you, his gaze drifting over your face and then down towards your chest and legs, still damp from the water.

He raises an eyebrow at you and responds in a low voice, “Good. I don’t think I’d let you, anyway.”

You decide to let the conversation end there, your pulse pounding as you look at him, the droplets of water drying on his chest. He’s hot, and you know that he knows it. The smirk on his lips hasn’t left since you made your way to the rocks and you can feel the tension between the two of you growing by the second. 

He swallows, feeling his heart begin to beat quicker as he looks at you. He wants so badly to reach out and touch you, but he holds back, knowing that doing so would probably drive him over the edge. He takes a deep breath and steadies himself. He’s not used to feeling this out of control when he’s with a woman. Normally he’s the one in charge, the one in control. But there’s something about you that makes him feel like he’s losing his grip, like he’s teetering on the edge of something new and different, and he can’t help but be drawn to it.

He shifts his body closer to you, his gaze fixed on your face as he speaks. “You want to swim some more or do you want to head back?”

“What do you want to do?” you ask, truly feeling like anything would be fun as long as it was him you were doing it with. 

He grins at you, the sparkle in his eye betraying his true desire. He wants to touch you, to pull you against him and feel your body pressed against his. But instead of saying that, he shrugs, “I’m good with whatever you want. Can’t promise we won’t find ourselves in the water again, though.”

With that you push up off the rocks and dive back into the creek, pushing the hair from your face as you resurface from the water. You splash the water up at him, soaking him and causing him to jump. 

“Oi!” he shouts, a bit of an accent peeking out from somewhere. 

“What’s wrong Kiszka? Can’t handle a little innocent splashing?” you taunt, trying to lure him into the water. What you don’t expect is for him to jump to his feet with a vengeful look in his eye. 

“Oh you just wait, sweetheart,” he pauses, charging towards you, “We will see how innocent–” 

You cut him off with another playful splash, drenching him again.  

He wipes the water from his face, shaking his head as if you have pushed him too far, “Mmhm, okay, now you’ve done it.” 

He jumps into the water next to you, wrapping his arms around you as he drags you beneath the surface. He pulls you down with him, holding you tight around the waist as you sink beneath the surface. The feeling of your body against his is intoxicating, and he revels in the sensation for a moment before popping back up and pulling you with him.

As you break the surface, he keeps his arms wrapped around you, holding you against him as you gasp for air. He grins, his smirk returning as he looks down at you. “Payback’s a hell of a thing, sweetheart.”

You push playfully at his shoulders, feeling his hands still holding your waist. A wicked grin is on his lips, and you're certain you’ve never seen someone so beautiful. He laughs as you push at him, not loosening his grip on your waist one bit. He can feel the way your body feels against his, soft and warm in stark contrast to the coolness of the water.

“Watch yourself, dove,” he warns, his smirk growing wider as he looks down at you. “You’re playing with fire.”

“How do we keep finding ourselves here,” you breathe. 

He looks down at you, his eyes locked on your face as he holds you in his arms. You feels the tension between you building, the heat of your bodies close together making your heart race in your chest.

He takes a deep breath, letting out a low chuckle as he replies, “I dunno, sweetheart, I sure don’t know.” His hand moves up to tuck a lock of your wet hair behind your ear. It feels like he wants to say more, but stops himself, settling for something else instead. “You want to head back?”

You feel a pang shoot through your chest, you don’t want to leave this spot, not now, not ever. “Sure,” you answer, and you wonder if he feels the same. 

He nods, a flicker of disappointment crossing his face. He had hoped you would say you didn’t want to leave, that you wanted to stay here just as much as he did. But he doesn’t argue with you, and instead just starts swimming towards the bank. 

“C’mon, it’s starting to get dark anyway, we should get back.” he says, letting you follow behind him. 

You find your belongings right where you left them, but the thought of putting clothes over your wet bikini has you cringing. Instead, you shove them into your backpack, holding Jake’s shirt up, silently asking him if he wants it. He shakes his head as he ties his boots, his hair still dripping down his back. You put on your own boots and sling the backpack over your shoulders, taking one last look at the creek you’d never forget. 

“You ready?” he asks, starting down the path. You nod and follow behind him, the trail lit by the perfect afternoon sun. Your hair is drying in waves around your face, much the same as his. 

He leads the way down the trail, his boots crunching on the ground below. His mind is wandering as he walks, stuck between the memory of holding you in the water just moments ago and the thought of possibly never doing it again. He sneaks glances at you out of the corner of his eye, admiring the way the sunlight is casting warm rays over your hair and face.

“Thanks for bringing me here, Jake,” you say, giving him a soft smile.

He turns to look at you, a small smile on his lips. He’s a little surprised at your sudden show of gratitude.

He shrugs a little, “You’re welcome. I come here whenever I need a break from things. It’s nice to have somewhere peaceful to escape to…” He trails off and looks away for a moment before continuing. “And nice to have someone to share it with.”

The two of you walk in content silence for most of the trail, the sun starting to dip lower and lower into the sky as the minutes pass. You notice a few clouds overhead, and thank them for a reprieve from the sun. You can feel yourself growing more and more tired with every step and before you know it you’re falling behind Jake. 

It’s as if he can hear your footsteps slowing behind him, and he stops walking, turning to look back at you. You’re several feet behind him now, your steps much more weary than they were earlier.

He raises an eyebrow as he looks at you. “You good, pretty girl?”

Your heart hammers in your chest at the pet name, but the fatigue is setting in so quickly you pay it no mind. “I don't know, I think so. I am just so exhausted suddenly.”

He sees the fatigue etched on your face, the way your steps are slowing down. He takes a step back towards you, concern evident in his eyes.

“You want to stop for a minute?” he asks, his voice softer than usual.

“How much farther is it? I can probably make it,” you ask. 

He takes a moment to think before responding, his eyes scanning over your face and your tired expression. He can tell you’re exhausted, but he also knows that you’re stubborn and determined to get back. “About another half mile, maybe a little less,” he replies. “You sure you can make it, sweetheart?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be fine, let’s just keep going,” you say, starting to walk again. It feels like you’re carrying a bag of bricks on your back, but you push through. 

So he silently falls into step beside you, watching like a hawk for any sign of your energy giving out on you. But that's when it hits him, "What if I carried you?"

“Carried me?” you ask.

He looks at you, a smirk dancing on his lips. “Yeah, carried you. I could give you a piggyback ride the rest of the way.”

“Jake, no…” you whine, deep down loving the idea. 

He laughs aloud at your protest, his eyes dancing with mischief. “Oh, come on, sweetheart, you know you want to. I can see it in your eyes. I bet your legs are going to give out on you any second now.”

“Are you sure?” you ask, feeling hesitant, but he is offering.

He grins, seeing the wheels turning in your head. “I'm sure. C’mere.” He motions for you to turn around, holding his arms open for you to climb onto his back.

You feel his arms wrap around your legs as you climb onto his back, feeling the warmth of his skin against your chest. You practically melt into him, your arms wrapping around his shoulders as your nose brushes against his hair, still wet from the creek.

He grunts a bit as you climb onto his back, the weight of you against him sending a wave of warmth through his body. He wraps his arms tightly around your legs, securely holding you in place, and is suddenly acutely aware of how close you are to each other. He can feel your breath on the back of his neck and the way your chest is pressed against his shoulders, the sensation making his heart beat a little faster than usual.

“Are you sure this is okay?" you ask, splaying your hand against his chest.

He takes a deep breath, enjoying the feeling of your hand on his skin. He nods, his voice a little huskier than usual. “Yeah, it's fine. Don't you worry ‘bout a thing, sweetheart.”

He adjusts his grip on you slightly, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thighs.

You walk like that for a little bit, your body quickly succumbing to the rhythmic bouncing from every step he takes. You find your eyes growing heavy, and your head starting to droop, and before you know it, your head is resting on his warm shoulder. 

He can't help but smile to himself as he realizes you've fallen asleep on his back. He adjusts his grip on you, trying to keep you as secure as possible as he continues walking down the trail, humming softly and feeling oddly content with the situation he has found himself in. 

It feels like seconds have passed before he gently taps your leg, waking you up as he speaks. “Hey, sleepyhead. We made it.”

He waits for you to regain your bearings and loosen your grip on him before carefully lowering you down from his back, his hands lingering at your waist for a moment longer than necessary.

“That felt like two minutes, tops,” you giggle.

He laughs, a soft chuckle that makes his chest vibrate. “Yeah, you passed out pretty fast there,” he pauses, “You hungry? I’m starving.”

“Starving,” you answer, maybe a little too quickly. 

He laughs again, the sound still as charming as usual. “Yeah, figured as much. Let's get something going.” 

He makes his way to the cooler, opening it up and pulling a pack of hotdogs from inside, “This looks like it,” he smiles, “Let me get the fire going and we will be cooking in no time.”

“Thanks for carrying me, Jake. Sorry I fell asleep on you,” you say, lowering your voice a little. 

He grins as he sets the hot dogs down, looking up at you. “No problem. And no need to apologize for dozing off.” He glances up as he strikes a match, igniting the kindling. “It was kind of...cute.”

Cute? Oh.

A strong gust of wind blows through the campsite, taking both of you by surprise, tossing a camp chair to its side. 

“Damn,” he says, moving to pick up the chair. He looks up to the sky, the clouds growing heavy and darkening. “We may be in for a bit of rain.”

“Tents are waterproof, right?” you ask nervously.

He chuckles at your question, a hint of playfulness in his voice. “Yeah, sweetheart, tents are waterproof.”

“Don’t laugh at me!” you whine. 

He grins, enjoying your playful pout. “I can't help it, you make it too easy.”

He looks at you again, the fire casting a warm glow over his features. “How about you go change into some dry clothes, these hotdogs will be done soon.”

You nod and head into your tent, stripping out of your bathing suit and pulling a t-shirt over your sun warmed skin. You add a pair of leggings and his flannel before stepping back out and seeing him assemble the hotdogs. Your stomach is growling, and you quickly realize you hadn’t eaten all day. 

He looks up as you come out of your tent, his eyes lingering on the way his flannel covers your form. He can feel his heart skip a beat at the sight of you in his shirt, but quickly composes himself.

He grins as he sees your expression, your hunger evident. “Ready?”

You nod as he hands you a paper plate, taking the seat next to you at the fire. The air is cooler than it was last night, and the humidity is growing by the second. Both of you quickly eat, very few words shared between the two of you. 

You both toss the paper plates into the fire, making quick work of cleaning up. He disappears into his tent for a few minutes, emerging in warmer clothes. His cheeks have a pink glow from the sun today, and you can’t help but think it makes him all the more pretty in the fire light.

“So what do you think, you gonna make us s’mores again tonight?” he asks, crossing his feet on the ledge of the fire pit.

You turn to look at him, “What? I thought you didn’t like them?”

He laughs softly, turning to look at you, “I like them when you make them,” he says, his confession warming your chest.

“Are you getting soft on me, Kiszka?” you tease, standing up to grab the ingredients from the cooler.

“Me? Soft?” he scoffs, pretending to be offended. “Never in a million years, sweetheart.”

He grins, the corners of his lips curling into a smirk, betraying his feigned annoyance. He grabs the two sticks from last night, holding them out to you as you place the marshmallows on the ends. This time you give him his own stick to hold, both of you twirling the sugary puffs in the flames. 

He carefully twirls his own marshmallow in the flames, occasionally stealing glances at you as you do the same. The air is quiet, save for the crackle of the fire and the distant sound of crickets, a rumble sounds in the distance but you both ignore it.

As the marshmallows puff up, you pull them from the fire, placing them gently on the graham cracker and chocolate. They melt perfectly and again, you offer him his first. He takes it from your hand, biting into it quickly, as you do the same. 

“Truly, I think it’s something about you,” he admits, taking another bite. “They just taste better when you do it.”

“It’s all in your head,” you laugh, licking marshmallows from your finger. His eyes watch as your tongue swipes over the digits, his throat bobbing as he swallows back his nerves. 

A yawn falls from your lips as he looks at you, the earlier exhaustion creeping up on you again. 

“You look tired, sweetheart.”

“I am, it just hit me out of nowhere again,” you admit. 

He chuckles softly, his shoulder brushing against yours. “Yeah, I can tell. You’ve been fighting it for the past twenty minutes.” He looks at you intently, studying your expression in the firelight. “Wanna call it a night?”

“What about you? I don't wanna leave you out here all by yourself?”

He shakes his head, a small smile on his lips. “Don't worry about me, sweetheart. I can handle myself.” He looks at you, a hint of playfulness in his gaze. “Besides, I don't mind being out here alone. It’s peaceful this time of night.”

“You sure?” you ask, a hint of guilt in your tone. 

He grins, his gaze unwavering as he looks at you. “Yeah, I'm sure. I'll just hang out until the fire smolders and enjoy the quiet out here before I head in.”

He can see the tiredness in your eyes, and he wants nothing more than to tuck you into the tent and hold you against him all night. But he keeps that last thought to himself. 

“Okay, well, thanks again for today. For showing me your secret place. I had a lot of fun with you," you say, clutching the cuffs of his flannel in your fists.

His heart skips a beat at your words, the sincerity in your tone making his chest ache. He looks at you, his gaze softening as he takes you in. “Don’t mention it, dove. I had a lot of fun too.” he says, his voice barely above a whisper.

You nod with a bashful smile, “Goodnight, Jake.”

He smiles at you, his gaze lingering on you for a moment before he replies. “Goodnight, sweetheart.”

He watches as you disappear into your tent, his eyes fixated on the flaps even after you’ve gone inside. He takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself as he looks back to the fire.

He sits there for a while longer, his thoughts consumed by images of you. He can practically still feel the way your skin felt against his, the weight of you on his back as he carried you down the trail. He can still picture the way you looked in his flannel, your eyes tired but still filled with a spark that sent shockwaves through his body. He wanted you, and he always had.

Despite his best efforts he found the feelings that he pushed down for so long had resurfaced with a vengeance, briefly making him question whether they were ever really gone at all. He’d  made up a hundred reasons why he shouldn’t want you, letting it show in his harsh words and hostile demeanor, all the while letting you root your way deeper and deeper into his heart with every caught smile and laugh. He’d done such a good job pushing you away that he started to believe the lies he was telling himself over the last two years. Although, that all came to a screeching halt the minute he decided to let you in last night. The minute you showed him that you wanted to know him beyond surface level, and the minute he realized you were everything he told himself you weren’t.

Inside your tent you are snuggling down into your sleeping bag, replaying the day over and over. The way his hands felt on you, the smile you drew out of him, all of it. You wanted to run back out there and beg him to join you in here, but you know you can't. 

You can hear the fire still crackling, and the sway of the trees in the wind. Thunder is rumbling in the distance, growing closer and closer. You zip the window flaps on your tent for good measure, but that's when you hear it. The sound of a guitar, softly strumming in the breeze. You can tell he is trying to play quietly, but part of you wishes it was just a little louder. 

You don’t recognize the song, but it's soft and sweet and twists your heart in two. You want to know the name. Did he write it? Is it even a real song yet? Instead you lay there, letting the music his hands are producing play you to sleep, wishing every night could be like tonight.

—

A crash of lightning pulls you from your sleep, the sound of the nylon ripping overhead, pulling a scream from your chest. Rain starts to pour into your tent, drenching you and all of your belongings before you even have time to process what's happening. You pull yourself out of your soaking wet tent to see the storm raging around you. The trees whipping wildly through the wind, and the rain falling so hard you can barely see. You turn to look at your tent finding a tree branch laying across the fiberglass poles, effectively ripping the top of your tent. 

“Shit!” you scream, trying to pull your soaked belongings from inside. Jake must have heard the commotion, pulling on his boots as he rushes over towards you.

“What’s going on? What happened?” he shouts, dripping wet from the pouring rain. His eyes are panicked as they search yours for an answer. 

“The tree! A branch fell and ripped my tent, everything is wet! I–”

He grabs your arms, pulling you a little closer to him, “Are you okay?” he asks, not caring about the tent. You came first. 

“Yes, yes! I’m fine, I just– my tent!” you cry, feeling overwhelmed. 

He curses under his breath, the sight of your slashed tent and your wet clothes fueling the anger inside of him. "Damn it," he shouts, trying to keep his cool as he surveys the damage. “Okay, look, just, go get in my tent. I’ll be there in a second.”

You nod graciously and head over to his tent, unzipping the flap and stepping inside. It’s much larger than yours and is filled with real camping equipment. It’s warm, and is lit with a lantern. You see his things laying neatly by his bag, and you do your best not to drip water onto everything. 

Jake watches as you head towards his tent, disappearing inside and zipping the flap behind you. He lets out a breath, running a frustrated hand through his hair before he turns back to your tent. He grabs the offending branch, tossing it aside before he starts to gather your items from inside. He carefully picks up your belongings, dashing over to his car and tossing them in the backseat. His boots are caked with mud as he makes his way back to his tent, leaving his boots outside as he joins you inside. 

“I tried to salvage your stuff, but everything is soaked. I put it in my car to dry out but…” he pauses, wiping the rain off of him as is drips down his face. 

“Thank you,” you breathe, realizing that both of you are wet and freezing now. He has the same realization as he crawls towards his bag.

He nods in response to your gratitude, his fingers digging through his belongings to find a dry shirt for you. He pulls out a plain t-shirt, the fabric soft and well-worn. He turns back to you, handing you the shirt as his gaze flits over your soaked form. 

“Here, put this on for now,” he says gruffly, trying to keep his train of thought focused on practicality and not how good you look wearing his clothes. “I just need to change into some dry clothes and then you can go back to sleep.”

“What?” you question, unsure of his logic. 

“I’ll change and then I’ll go sleep in my car, you can take the air mattress,” he says, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world that you’d get the better accommodations. 

“What? Jake, no. I’m not taking your tent and making you sleep in your car. No way.” you say, putting your foot down. “I’ll sleep in your car.”

He sits there, stunned at your words. He wasn't expecting resistance from you, expecting you to happily accept him taking the brunt of the damage.

“No, Y/N. Absolutely not. You’ll be much warmer here with the sleeping bag and the air mattress. You’re shivering, you’re not sleeping in the cold ass car,” he snaps, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Well, I’m not letting you sleep in the car,” you argue. “We can just– both share the air mattress. I’m fine with it if you are.”

He looks at you incredulously, his brain short-circuiting at your suggestion. The thought of sharing that small space with you, of being that close to you in the dark, is both tantalizing and terrifying. He opens his mouth to argue again, but the words get stuck in his throat. He swallows hard, his eyes flicking over your figure again. He wants to protest, to say no and keep his distance, but the look in your eyes dares him to argue.

“Fine,” he relents, his voice gruff and reluctant. “But only if you're sure you're okay with it."

“I’m okay with it Jake,” your voice softer now.

He nods, his eyes searching your expression to be sure you mean it. You nod again and he understands. He digs into his bag again producing a pair of worn gray sweatpants, handing them to you with a gleam in his eye. 

You take the sweatpants from him, your fingers brushing against his for a moment. It's a brief contact, but it sends a jolt of electricity through your body. He turns to give you a bit of privacy, despite seeing you half naked already once today. You quickly strip out of your soaked clothes, shivering from the cold air on your bare skin. You pull on the sweatpants, the warm, soft fabric enveloping your legs. You pull the wet shirt from your body and toss it to the ground before putting on the t-shirt that smells exactly like him. 

“Okay, I'm good,” you say, your voice soft.

He turns around and his breath stutters at the sight of you in his clothes. The sweatpants are a little baggy on you, the legs pooling around your ankles. The t-shirt clings to your curves, the fabric stretched tight over your chest. He can feel his heart pounding in his chest, his body reacting to the sight of you more than it should.

He swallows hard, trying to keep his cool. “You look–” he starts to say, his voice cracking slightly.

“Warm?” you smile, suddenly feeling a bit shy. 

He manages to nod in response to your question, his voice gravelly when he speaks. “Yeah,” he says, his eyes flickering to your face for a moment before darting away again. “Warm."

You turn to offer him the same privacy, listening as you hear his wet clothes hit the ground. He is quick to change, pulling on a pair of boxer shorts and a black long sleeve t-shirt. 

“All good,” he says, moving closer to the air mattress. You try not to stare at him in his boxers, but it’s hard not to. 

He motions towards the air mattress, and you crawl towards it, positioning yourself on one side as he takes the other. You notice that you must be occupying the side he was previously on, seeing a book and a water bottle sitting next to your head. 

He crawls onto the air mattress beside you, the small space suddenly feeling much smaller with the two of you in it. He tries to keep some distance between you both, not wanting to get too close and make you uncomfortable.  The air in the tent is thick with tension, the heat of your bodies so close together in the small space. The rain continues to pour outside, falling harshly against the nylon of the tent.

He can hear your breathing, the sound of each intake of breath filling the silence between you. He's acutely aware of your presence beside him, your body just inches away from his, and he is doing everything in his power from pulling you into him.

“Were you reading?” you ask, trying to fill the silence. He looks surprised that you've spoken, his eyes flickering over to you for a moment. He'd been caught up in his thoughts, lost in the feeling of being so close to you in the small space.

He nods, gesturing towards the book next to your head. “Yeah, I was.” he says, his voice a little gruff. “It's a pretty good book.”

“What's it about?” you ask, rolling to face him.

He takes a moment to remember the premise of the book, his mind still a little clouded with the feeling of being so close to you.

“It's um, it’s a crime thriller,” he replies. “It's about a detective trying to solve a series of murders in a small town. It's pretty intense, actually.” 

You giggle, “I wouldn't have taken you for a thriller novel kind of guy.”

He raises an eyebrow at your response, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “And what kind of guy did you think I would be?” he asks, his tone a mix of curiosity and amusement.

“I don’t know. Maybe a biography guy? History maybe?”

He chuckles at your response, a small laugh escaping his lips. “Biographies and history, huh? I mean, I read those too,” he says with a smirk. “But I like a good thriller from time to time.”

He glances over at you, his eyes trailing over your features as you yawn. He reaches over and turns off the lantern, leaving the two of you in darkness with the sound of the rain. 

“You tired?” he asks, his voice a little softer now. 

“Yeah, a little, but that kind of woke me up. I can't lie,” you answer, shivering a little as you lay on the air mattress. Jake seems to notice and immediately sits up, unzipping his sleeping bag and tossing half of it onto your body. His movements are quick and practiced, his eyes flickering to your face to make sure you're covered up.

He lays back down, his body now closer to yours under the shared cover. He takes a deep breath, trying to calm the racing of his heart. The silence hangs in the air again, the sound of the rain outside the only noise breaking through the tension between you. He can hear your breathing beside him, your body so close to his under the covers. He's acutely aware of the feel of your body heat radiating against his skin, the proximity of your bodies igniting a spark inside of him.

He tries to keep his eyes trained on the ceiling of the tent, but they keep drifting back towards you, taking in the way your hair fans out around your face as you look at him.

“I’m glad you’re okay, Y/N,” he says, his voice barely a whisper. 

You slide your hand up to rest on his cheek, warm and stubbly, “Thank you for coming to save me,” you breathe.

His breath hitches in his throat at the feeling of your hand on his cheek, the touch sending a shiver down his spine. He leans into your palm, his eyes fluttering closed for just a moment. He can feel his heart racing in his chest, the warmth of your touch making his skin tingle. He opens his eyes, looking over at you with a mixture of surprise and something else. Something...soft.

“I'll always come save you,” he says, his voice low and gentle.

Your eyes flick down to his lips, pink and full, before meeting his dark brown eyes again. “All this time I thought you hated me.”

He swallows hard, his eyes fixed on yours as he hears your words. He can feel the tension coiled tight in the space between you, the atmosphere thick with unspoken desire. He hesitates for a moment, his eyes flickering over your face as if he's searching for something. 

Finally, he speaks. “I don't hate you,” he says, his voice low and soft. “I’ve never hated you, I always liked you. Too much, probably.”

“What?”

He takes a deep breath, the words spilling out of him before he can stop them.

“I never hated you, sweetheart,” he repeats, his voice softer this time. “I always liked you, maybe a little too much. I remember when Josh met Clara, he told me that you, specifically, were off limits. Of course at that point it was already too late. I swear it just made me want you more. I knew I couldn't go against him, though. I knew he had his reasons. I just...I didn’t know how to deal with it, being around you and not being able to have you, so I pushed you away. It was the only thing that worked.”

His eyes meet yours, his expression vulnerable and open. “It was easier to be cold to you than to be myself and fall for someone that I can't have.”

“Jake,” you breathe, sliding your thumb against his cheek. He closes his eyes at the sound of his name on your lips, feeling your thumb glide along his skin. It feels like electricity zipping through his body, igniting every nerve ending all at once. He turns his face towards your touch, his cheek pressing into your palm as he revels in the feeling.

“He didn’t even tell me that you were going to be on this trip. He knew I wouldn’t have come if I knew you were going to be here, too. He knew I wouldn’t subject myself to that. Honestly, I was doing okay controlling myself, until today.”

“Today, at the creek…” you continue. 

His eyes flutter open, his gaze locking with yours as he hears you mention it. The memory of that moment floods through his mind, the sight of your body in the water burned into his brain.

He swallows hard, his throat dry as he nods in response. “Yeah,” he whispers. “Today at the creek,” he repeats, his voice hoarse. 

You nod your head and bite your lip as your mind replays its own memories. 

He shifts his body subtly closer to you, the heat between you growing with each passing moment. He can feel the tension building to a fever pitch, the air thick with desire and need.

“I wanted to kiss you, sweetheart. I really did. I almost did. Touching you like that, fuck. You letting me carry you back. Just sitting by the fire with you. It’s the best day I have had in a long ass time. Didn’t want it to end, but I knew you were exhausted. I wanted to tell you tonight, but things just didn’t work out. I figured it was probably for the best,” he confesses, his eyes never leaving yours. 

Your hand drops to his chest, the warmth of his skin evident through his t-shirt, “I wanted you to kiss me, Jake. I wanted your hands on me, everywhere. In fact, I never don’t want your hands on me,” you say, feeling his hand nervously slide up and over the curve of your waist. 

He listens to your words, disbelief and desire warring within him as he realizes you feel the same way he does. He swallows hard, his hand on your waist trembling slightly as he absorbs your words. He slides closer to you, his body now pressed snugly against yours under the covers. Your faces are so close that he can feel your breath on his cheek.

“Well fuck me, sweetheart,” he growls. His eyes rake over your features, taking in the way your pupils are dilating with desire, the flush on your cheeks and the way your breath hitches when he moves closer to you.

He’s never seen you look so beautiful, and the realization that he’s the cause of it makes his heart swell in his chest. “I’ve wanted you for so long,” he whispers, his voice barely louder than a breath. 

“Jake,” you beg. 

His heart clenches at the sound of you begging for him, the need in your voice nearly driving him mad with desire. He wants to hear you say his name again and again, to feel your body against his and your skin under his hands.

He leans closer to you, his breath warm against your neck as he speaks. “Say my name again, sweetheart,” he murmurs, his voice low and rough.

“Kiss me, Jake,” you plead, unable to wait a second longer. 

He doesn’t need to be told twice. At your words, he crashes his lips against yours in a desperate kiss, all of the tension and desire between you finally igniting in a blaze of passion.

His hands roam over your body, exploring all the curves he’s wanted to touch for so long. He kisses you deeply, his tongue teasing the seam of your lips, seeking entry into your mouth.

He shifts his body over yours, pinning you to the air mattress as he continues to kiss you hungrily. His hands slide up your body, fingers tangling in your hair as he holds your head in place, his tongue delving deeper into your mouth.

He moans lowly, the sound muffled as his body presses flush against yours under the covers. He can feel the heat radiating off of you, the sensation driving him mad with desire. 

Your hands snake around his waist, sliding beneath his shirt, and pulling it up and over his head. He lets out a sharp breath as he feels your hands on his skin, the feeling of your fingers against his bare flesh sending a shiver down his spine. He breaks the kiss for just a moment, pulling back just enough to let you yank the shirt over his head and toss it aside.

He takes a moment to admire your flushed cheeks and the way your eyes trail over his now bare torso. He grins at the hungry look in your eyes as you take in his muscular chest and stomach. 

“Don’t look at me like that sweetheart, it’ll get you into trouble.” he warns.

“I like trouble,” you say, drinking in the sight of him as he pins you to the air mattress. 

He laughs at your response, the sound deep and gravelly in his chest. “You would,” he says, a smirk playing on his lips. “I think that’s why I like you.”

He leans back down to capture your lips in another kiss, his bare chest now pressed against yours. He runs his hands up and down your sides, his fingers tracing the curve of your waist and the swell of your hips beneath your sweatpants.

As he kisses you, he slips his thigh between your legs, pressing his body even closer against yours. He runs his tongue along your jawbone, trailing kisses along your neck as he moves down to your throat.

He sucks lightly at your pulse point, nipping at the sensitive skin before soothing it with his tongue. His fingers reach for the hem of your t-shirt slowly dragging it up over your body.  “Take this off for me, dove,” he whispers.

You lift up, letting him drag the old, threadbare shirt over your chest. His eyes take in the sight of your bare skin in the low light of the tent. His breath stutters at the sight of your body, the way the light dances across your curves making his throat go dry.

He lets out a low moan as he looks at you, his hands roaming freely over your bare skin. “Goddamn,” he says, his voice thick with desire. “You’re gorgeous.”

His hands trace the curves of your breasts, sliding down over your waist and to the waistband of your sweatpants. His eyes lock onto yours as his hands move down your body, his touch searing against your skin. He teases at the waistband of your sweatpants, his fingers tracing soft circles against your hip bones.

He can feel the warmth of your body beneath his palm, the way your skin twitches in anticipation under his touch sending a jolt of desire through his body. “Can I take these off?” he whispers, his voice rough with need.

“Please,” you beg. 

He grins at your response, the sound of you begging awakening something primal in him. He slides his hands into the waistband of your sweatpants, his fingers brushing lightly against your skin as he slowly starts to pull them down your legs.

His eyes never leave your face as he exposes more and more of your body, his tongue darting out to wet his lips in anticipation. Once he's removed the offending article of clothing, he lets his gaze roam over your body once again. His eyes trail over your bare skin, taking in the way the light from the storm outside casts shadows over your curves. He reaches out, his hands tracing over your legs, his touch gentle and reverent.

He can feel the heat radiating from your core, the way your body responds to his touch making him ache with desire. He leans down, pressing kisses over your stomach and hips, his lips roaming over your skin like a man starved.

You can hardly stand it, the feel of his lips on your skin is making you feel insane, “Touch me, Jake,” you plead. 

He lets out a low groan at your words, the sound sending a shiver down his spine. He leans back, locking his eyes with yours as he reaches for your hips once again, gripping them firmly.

“I'll touch you, baby,” he whispers, his voice thick with desire. “As much as you want. Where do you want my hands, sweetheart?”

“Everywhere, Jake. I told you,” you beg. 

“That’s quite the request, darling,” he says, the sound of the air mattress echoing as he repositions himself as carefully as possible. Your hands tug at the waistband of his boxers, eliciting a laugh from his chest. 

“Impatient, baby?”

“I just want you, Jake.” you confess. 

“I want you too, sweetheart, you have no idea,” he whispers, his eyes locking with yours.

He pushes his boxers down, kicking them off somewhere in the tent as he moves back over you. He braces himself on his forearms, his body pressed flush against yours again as he looks down at you. You get a wicked gleam in your eye, hooking your leg around his, and twisting until you are over top of him, straddling his waist. 

He grins up at you, his eyes raking over your body. “Well I’ll be damned, look at you,” he says, a note of surprise and arousal in his voice.

You give him a proud smile, sitting happily on top of him, enjoying the view below. You can feel how wet you are as it coats your inner thighs, and you know he is privy to this as well as the light reflects from your thighs.  

“You look so damn good on top of me,” he says, his voice rough and low. “Like you belong there. It’s fuckin’ hot.”

“You’re fucking hot,” you counter, brushing the hair off of his face. 

He lets out a laugh at your words, a grin spreading across his face. “And so articulate too,” he teases, his grip on your hips tightening as he speaks. His hand moves towards your center, his thumb brushing lightly against your clit. 

“Jesus,” you whine, his touch sending you soaring. 

“Not here, love,” he smirks. 

You grind yourself against him, a moan falling from his lips, “What was that you were saying?” you ask playfully. 

“Oh shit,” he groans, his hands gripping your hips tighter as you continue to move against him. He opens his eyes, locking them with yours as he tries to compose himself. “Don’t tease me sweetheart, it’s unbecoming.” he says, his voice rough.

You lift up to your knees, hovering over him enough to grab his length in your fist. A hiss leaves his chest at your touch, his jaw falling open as his eyes lock on yours. You drag his tip through your wetness, his eyes growing impossibly darker at the sensation. 

“Fuck me,” he pants, “Listen, if we’re gonna do this, I want to go slow. I have fucking dreamed about this moment. That and if I fuck you how I want to fuck you, we will pop this air matress. That will be for another time.”

You nod as you slowly sink down over him, taking every inch he has to offer. “Another time, huh? What makes you think–”

He delivers a pointed thrust up into you, stealing the air from your lungs. 

“That. That’s what makes me think, sweetheart,” he answers, grabbing your hips and helping you start to move on top of him. 

“Fuck, Jake,” you whine, feeling him stretch you out so completely. So fully. 

He lets out a low growl at your words, the sound filled with desire and need. “Yeah?” he asks, his voice low and gruff.

His hands grip your hips even tighter as you move above him, his fingers digging into your skin as his body responds to your movements. “You feel so good, sweetheart, better than I imagined.” he groans, his eyes locked on yours.

You start to move your hips in a wave pattern, his length hitting you right where you need him. A cry leaves your chest as you toss your head back, feeling his hand move to support your lower back. The heat of the tent combined with the friction between you is making things even hotter, both of you growing sweaty and breathless as you move against each other.

He lets out a low moan, his hands moving up your body to grip your shoulders tightly. “Christ, baby, you’re a fucking dream,” he groans, his body arching up against yours as he snaps his hips up to meet yours. 

“Harder, Jake,” you plead. 

He lets out a sharp gasp as you say his name, his eyes darkening with desire. “Harder?” he asks, his voice thick and rough. “You want it harder, sweetheart?”

“Please, baby,” you whine.

He lets out a low growl at your plea, his hands tightening on your shoulders. “Yeah sweetheart, I got you.” he murmurs, his voice low and guttural. “Give you anything you want.”

You lean down letting him capture your lips in a passionate kiss, his tongue delving into your mouth as he pulls you closer against him. His hips buck upwards with more force now, his body moving against yours with increasing intensity. Your stomach is burning with need and you know it won’t be much longer until you burst into flames. 

“Don’t stop, baby, please,” you cry out, feeling your stomach growing hot. He lets out a muffled groan at your words, his hands gripping you tighter as he continues to fuck you. 

“God, you feel incredible,” he gasps, his mouth moving to your neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin. His hands move towards your ass, his fingers gripping into the supple flesh as he thrusts up into you. Your skin is slick with sweat and arousal, the lewd sounds filling the tent with the sound of the rain. He can hardly contain his moans now, matching your energy in the small tent.

“Sit up, I want to look at your tits while I fuck you,” he growls. 

You hear a hint of dominance fall from his lips and you can’t help but to obey. You sit up, straddling him again, as he leans up on his elbows to watch you. 

He lets out a guttural moan as you do as he asks, sitting up above him and giving him an even better view of your body. He runs his hand up your thigh, his eyes locked on your face.

“You like this?” you say, swirling your hips in a figure eight. 

“Yeah, sweetheart,” he growls, his hands gripping your hips tightly. “I like this a lot.” His hand moves to cup at your tits, bouncing as you continue to fuck him. “You’re so fucking wet for me, baby.”

“I always am,” you say, biting at your bottom lip as you try to stave off your orgasm. 

He smiles at your response, his hands still gripping your thighs. He leans up again, capturing your lips in another intense kiss, his tongue sliding against yours as he pulls you closer against him. He bites at your lower lip, his teeth grazing your skin softly. The feeling of his teeth on your skin pushes you over the edge, and you’re sure he can feel you tightening around him. 

“I’m close, baby,” you whine. 

"Yeah?" he asks, his voice thick with desire. "Gonna come for me, sweetheart?"

He slides his hand down between your bodies, his fingers finding the sensitive bundle of nerves and circling it slowly and insistently. “Come for me, baby,” he whispers, his mouth moving to your ear. “Come right on my cock, just like this.”

“Come with me, Jake,” you beg, feeling his lips connect to the side of your neck. 

He lets out a low groan at your words, his body shuddering as he nears the edge. “Yeah...yeah I'm there sweetheart, I’m right fucking there,” he gasps, his hands gripping you tightly as his body moves against yours. “Say you’re mine, baby.”

Just the thought of him wanting to claim you as his sends you over the edge, your body giving in to your orgasm as you fall apart on top of him. “I’m yours Jake. Yours.”

He lets out a deep, guttural moan at your words, his body shuddering as he loses himself in your arms. “That’s right sweetheart, you're fucking mine,” he gasps, his voice ragged. “Mine and no one else's.”

He holds you close as he comes, his body shaking and shuddering against yours. "Fuck," he groans, his grip on you tight as he rides out the waves of his own release, hot as it spills inside of you. 

“Jake, fuck,” you pant, finally coming down from what is probably the best orgasm of your life. 

“God you’re fucking sexy,” he pants, “Jesus Christ. Incredible, actually.”

“You’re incredible,” you smile, lifting up and off of him. His hands don’t leave you though, not wanting you to stray too far. 

He grins at your words, his arms tightening around you as he holds you close. “You give me too much credit, sweetheart,” he says, his voice gruff and spent. “We just fucked on an air mattress,” he laughs.

He leans back and looks at you, a satisfied smile on his face. “God, you have no idea how long I've wanted to do that,” he admits, his eyes roving over your face.

“Probably as long as I have if I had to guess,” you smile. 

He lets out a low chuckle, a grin spreading across his face as he nods. “You'd be right about that,” he says, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin. “I've wanted you for a long time, sweetheart. Longer than I care to admit.”

“Well you have me now?” you say nervously.

His expression softens at your words, a smile spreading across his face. “Yeah, I do,” he says softly. He cups your face in his hand, his thumb tracing over your cheek. “And I'm not letting you go. You're mine now, sweetheart.”

“I think I always wanted to be,” you confess.

He grins at your words, a possessive glint in his eyes. “Yeah?”

You nod sweetly as you reach for your clothes, the chill returning to the tent. You hand him his shirt and his boxers, pulling his sweats and t-shirt back over your body. He watches as you dress yourself in his clothing, a satisfied smile on his face. 

“You look so fucking hot in my clothes, please never try to give them back,” he says, his eyes raking over you with a smile. 

You giggle and shake your head, watching him pull his own clothes on before crawling back onto the air mattress. You snuggle into his side, feeling his arms wrap around you. He pulls you closer against him, nuzzling his face into your damp hair, his breath hot against your neck.

He lets out a content sigh, his fingers tracing lazy circles on your skin as he holds you close. “I could get used to this,” he murmurs, his voice soft and sleepy.

“Oh, no, I thought you liked camping alone,” you tease with a giggle.

He laughs, his chest rumbling against your back. “Yeah yeah, shut up,” he says playfully, giving your side a squeeze. He snuggles into you more, burying his face in your neck and inhaling deeply. “Don't get used to me wanting your company,” he jokingly warns you.

“Oh yeah? Want me gone by morning?” you taunt, letting your fingers trace shapes into his stomach.

He grins against your skin, his arms tightening around you. “Oh, I don't know if I'll wait that long,” he teases back. He presses soft, gentle kisses along your neck and shoulder, his lips moving slowly over your skin. “I might just kick you out now.”

“Ahh, there you are. I was wondering where you went. You were being far too sweet.” you tease.

He laughs, pulling back to look at you. “Oh? You prefer me mean, is that it?” he asks, raising an eyebrow at you. He gives you a playful nudge, a teasing glint in his eyes. “I can be an ass if you want, sweetheart. It really is no problem.”

“No, no. I think I'll keep you just like this.” you say nuzzling under his chin. You listen to the steady beating of his heart, feeling your eyes grow tired. He runs his fingers through your hair, a soft, soothing gesture meant to lull you to sleep. He grins slightly as he feels your breathing begin to slow, knowing that you're on the verge of sleep. 

“Tired, sweetheart?” he asks quietly, his voice soft and low.

“I am now,” you whisper. 

He lets out a soft chuckle at your sleepy response, his arms still wrapped tightly around you. He plants a soft kiss on the top of your head, his fingers resuming their gentle caresses through your hair. 

“Then close your eyes,” he murmurs, his voice even quieter now. “I'll be here when you wake up.”

“Goodnight, Jake,” you breathe, slipping quickly. 

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” he whispers, his voice low and soothing. He presses a soft kiss to your forehead, his fingers continuing to gently massage your scalp as he feels you slowly drift off to sleep.

—

You wake the next morning finding that the sun hasn't risen fully yet, and the air is chilly. You’re warm though, wrapped up in Jake beneath the sleeping bag.  He feels you stirring next to him, a smile spreading across his face as he feels you wake up. He's been lying awake for a little while now, just watching you sleep and enjoying the feeling of you in his arms.

“Good morning,” he murmurs, his voice low and rough with sleep. 

“Morning,” you answer, turning to look at his tired face.

He grins as you reply to him, his arms tightening around you. “Sleep well?” he asks, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin.

“So good. Did you?” you ask with a sleepy yawn.

He chuckles softly, his chest rumbling against your back. “Yeah, I slept great,” he replies, his voice still rough and gravelly. He shifts slightly, pulling you closer against him and nuzzling his face into your hair. “Best night's sleep I've had in a long time.”

You smile as you roll into him, placing a kiss on his warm chest.

He lets out a low groan at your kiss, his body shuddering slightly as he feels your lips on his skin. “Careful, sweetheart. You keep doing things like that and we'll never get out of this tent.”

“I’m kinda sad that we have to leave today,” you say, tilting your head up to meet his eyes. 

He smiles down at you, his eyes soft and tender. “Yeah, me too,” he admits, his hand coming up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “It's been nice having you all to myself. Don't want to share you with the rest of the world, now.”

You giggle against his chest, a warmth washing over you as you feel his fingers moving lazily against your skin, “Ugh, the rest of the world, don’t remind me…”

“Actually, speaking of, Josh texted me,” he says, a chuckle leaving his chest. 

“Did he?”

“Yeah, said he hoped we hadn’t killed each other because neither of them had heard from us since they left,” he smiles, pulling you tight against him. 

You gasp, realizing he’s right, “Shit, I– I totally forgot about them.”

He laughs, his chest rumbling beneath you, “Yeah, I did too. I guess we were just– a little preoccupied,” he grins. 

“Do we tell them?” you ask nervously. 

He considers it for a moment, a thoughtful expression on his face, “I mean, yeah, we probably should,” he pauses, “They don’t need the details, but I think they should know.”

“Won’t Josh be mad?” you ask, scared of his answer. 

He laughs at your question. “Yeah, absolutely he will. He'll give me one of his long winded lectures about being nice to you and treating you right. Make some threats about what he'll do if I hurt you. You know, the usual.” 

You nudge him with your elbow, “Maybe that isn’t a half bad idea,” you tease.

He laughs, feigning offense. “Hey now, don't side with him,” he says, giving you a playful nudge in return. He pulls you closer against him, his arms wrapping around you tightly. “But seriously, I don't think Josh will be too surprised. I think he's always known something was bound to happen between the two of us whether he wanted it to or not.”

“I’m glad it finally did.”

He grins, his eyes locking on yours. “Me too, sweetheart.” He pulls you closer, his body enveloping yours as he holds you tightly against him. “I just wish we had more time alone together,” he says, his voice suddenly serious.

“What do you mean?” you ask. 

“I mean, once we leave here it’s going to be different, you know? We’ll have the band, tour, media, friends, all of it. I just– I know it’s a lot to deal with. You’ve been around Josh and Clara, you know how it can be. I just– I want you around, but I don’t want that to scare you away.”

You smirk at him, “It’s not going to scare me away, Jake. I just want you to be really sure this is something you want to get into right now.”

He looks into your eyes, his expression serious. “I’m sure,” he says firmly. “I know it’s not going to be easy. I know there will be challenges. But I’m sure about you. About us.” He takes your face in his hands, his palms cupping your cheeks. “You’re all I want. Nothing else matters.”

You nod your head in his hand, pressing a kiss to his palm, “Okay, then I’m in if you are.”

His eyes soften as you kiss his palm, a smile spreading across his face. “I'm more than in,” he says, his voice low and gruff. “I don't want you to ever doubt that. I'm yours, sweetheart.” He pulls you closer, wrapping his arms around you tightly and holding you against him. “And I plan on showing you just how much I want you, every single day.”

“Well, everyday until tour starts back up, right?” you tease playfully. 

He laughs, shaking his head at your taunting, “Yeah, alright, smartass,” he grins, giving you a playful pinch on the side. He rolls over on top of you, his body pressing you down into the air mattress as he looks down at you with a smirk. “Don't worry, I'll make up for the lost time.”

“Oh, tempting…Maybe on a real bed? Not an air mattress?” you smirk. 

He chuckles, his eyes raking over your body, "Is this your way of asking me to take you home with me, sweetheart?" he grins.

“Unless you’d like a redo on my twin size,” you quip.

“Baby, have you ever been on a tour bus?” he giggles, pressing kisses to your neck.

You shake your head, laughing as his fingers tickle into your ribs, “No.”

“Mmm, you’re in for a real treat.” He grins down at you, his eyes glinting with desire. "Yeah, I think a real bed sounds like a good idea. And a real shower."

“A shower…” you breathe, the idea sounding desperately appealing. 

He laughs, noticing the way you react to the idea. “Yeah baby, a shower. A big, hot shower with actual water pressure. And a nice bed with sheets and blankets and the best feather pillows you’ve ever laid your head on.”

“Mhmm, maybe we should pack up now and get there immediately,” you giggle. 

“We should.” He presses his lips to yours again, warm as they linger there, “To be continued,” he says, pushing up off of the air mattress and stepping out into the sun. 

You spend the rest of the morning packing up the campsite, tearing down your tents and loading them into his car, sneaking glances at each other every few minutes. Jake works to organize everything into the small trunk, with the addition of your tent and Josh and Clara’s. You drain the cooler as he closes the trunk, dusting his hands off on his pants. “You ready, sweetheart?”

“Yep! Just this and we are all set,” you shout. 

He walks over to you, grabbing the cooler and walking it back to his car with you in tow. He opens the passenger side door for you, gesturing you inside, before joining you on the other side. 

“You know, I really am kind of sad to leave,” you laugh, “I never thought I would be saying that, but–”

“It’s a magical place,” he smiles, “S’why I come here so much.”

“Maybe we can come back?” you ask, tilting your head against the headrest. 

“Oh definitely,” he answers, “Whenever you want, sweetheart.” His hand comes to rest on your knee, his thumb stroking against your skin as he navigates the car out of the woods and back towards the road. You give him a warm smile, feeling the air conditioner bring chills to your skin. 

“Hey, I was um, I was serious about you coming home with me,” he says, taking his eyes off of the road to meet yours in a quick glance. 

“Oh, I mean, I would like that. If you’re really sure,” you answer nervously. 

He gives your thigh a gentle squeeze, a smile coming to his lips, “I’m really sure. I want to be with you as much as I can before I leave. Want you in my bed, my shower, the whole house really. All of it. I just want you.”

You blush, his words sending a shockwave through your system, “Okay.”

He grins widely, “Good.” He squeezes your thigh, his palm hot against your skin. “Should be home pretty quick, now.” 

“It is Sunday funday, right?” you giggle. “But, I guess that's kinda everyday for you, isn’t it?”

“Very funny,” he taunts, his expression growing serious, “But yes. It is,” he answers, grabbing your attention as you turn to look at him. He sends you a playful wink as he pats your thigh, letting out a deep breath that almost seemed like he was relieved. 

“Let me make you dinner tonight,” he says, keeping his stare focused on the overgrown highway. “Real dinner.”

“Oh, real dinner, huh?” you tease, placing your hand over top of his. “I feel like I vaguely remember hearing about you being a good cook, but I can’t remember for sure.”

He laughs, “What else have you heard about me, baby?”

Just as you go to answer his phone rings through the car speakers. You can see on the display that it is Josh calling him, and he glances to you before accepting the call. 

“What’s up?” he asks. 

“Dude, are you two alive? What the fuck is going on?” he asks, a tone of sarcasm in his voice. 

“Yeah we are alive. You know there’s no reception out there. Kinda the reason I go,” he says, hoping to jog his memory. 

“So you didn’t kill each other, that’s great news.” Josh says, and you can hear Clara laughing in the background.

Jake looks over at you, his eyes silently begging the question of if he should break the news to him. You take a minute to consider the risks but decide there really aren’t any. You nod eagerly at Jake, watching as he nods back in understanding. 

“Hey, uh, you two busy tonight?” he asks, his one hand gripping the steering wheel. 

“Not that I know of, why?” he answers. 

“Well, we are just now on our way back. Need to unload, shower, all that. How about you guys come over for dinner tonight? I’m cooking,” he says. You can sense the nerves in his tone, his face serious as he waits for Josh’s reply. 

“Um, yeah yeah that should be…good. You said we… Is… there a we?” he asks, his voice a little quieter. 

“Just come over tonight. Both of you. Just got some things to tell you,” he says, a smile pulling across his lips. 

A huff leaves his lips, “Things to tell me?”

“Hi Josh!” you say, speaking up on the call. 

“Holy shit, hey Y/N,” Josh answers, a hint of bewilderment in his voice. 

“See you tonight?” you ask, hearing him gasp in shock. You can hear him pull the phone away from his ear, doing his best to cover the microphone with his hand, “Holy fuck, Clara you were right. It happened,” he says in a mumbled mess. You know he did not intend for either of you to hear it, but you did.

“Josh?” Jake says, pulling him back to the call. 

“Yeah, yeah,” he says, clearing his throat, “Sorry, yeah– we will definitely be there.”

“See you tonight, Josh?” you ask, lacing your fingers with Jake’s, feeling his warm hand in yours. He leans over and kisses your cheek before settling back in his seat.

You listen to Josh laugh through the speakers, sighing as he speaks, “Yeah, I guess I will see you tonight.”

.

.

.

.

.

.

xo, N

Taglist: @gretavanmoon @wetkleenex-gvf @eyelinerjake @farfromthehomelands @sacredstarcatcher @britney-gvf @stardustjake @jakesmustache @starshine-wagner @mweasley19 @joopsenthusiast @ageofbajabule @ladywhimsymoon @vanfleeter @myleftsock @joshskittytickler @ageoflou @freefallthoughts @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @literal-dead-leaf @welllauragvf @writingcold @bizzielisteningtogreta @neptune2324 @itsafullmoon @violet-hayes @gvfmarge @demonrat444 @mybussyinchrist @cl0ver-j4de @earthgrlsreasy @what-i-read-home-of-reblogs-mama @mama-likes72 @laurngvf @racheljuneeee @farfromthehomelands @cat3rpillarbaby @cassiesgreta @jarmonicasweat@ghostly--photography @josh-iamyour-mama @raviolilegs @gvfmarge @milkgemini @jaketlove @watchingover-hypegirl @ageoflou @cl0ver-j4de @takenbythemadness @lightmyloverry

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[pippenpaddlopsicopolisthethird]

Write twins better in three easy steps!

I meet so many people who act so stupid about this to my face, and I basically never see a set of identical twins that are well written in fiction, so here's a couple tips about identical twins. Mostly as a reference for writing them, but also so you can tell people to stop acting like an asshole to any twins you might know IRL.

FACT ONE:

Identical twins are two separate people.

Not one brain in two bodies

Not a hivemind that can read each other's thoughts

They don't speak in unison all the time (but might answer together if you address them as a collective and not an individual)

If they date they don't share the same partner

Can't be counted as one person for the sake of entry admission, airplane seating, employment, school tuition, or voting

Have their own names, even, and would prefer you use them instead of calling them both by the same collective name

I am eternally mad about We-Go from Kim Possible

FACT TWO:

Identical twins don't struggle telling themselves apart from each other. Your difficulty telling them apart is not something they have ever experienced themselves.

They understand the difference between looking at themself in the mirror and looking at their twin.

Yes, even as a young child.

No, they didn't have to learn the difference between a mirror and their sibling.

They never believe their twin to be themself.

They don't struggle to see themself as their own person.

They don't feel like they're looking at their own face all the time.

They don't have constant thoughts about how their sibling looks similar to themself.

The scene from The Parent Trap where one "twin" says 'OMG why do you look just like me??' just isn't realistic

FACT THREE:

Identical twins are, as a rule, not trying to actively deceive you and are sick of people assuming that.

Your difficulty in telling them apart does not mean they are trying intentionally to trick you or make you mess up

They also aren't trying to scare you or murder you and they won't like you if you tell them you're afraid of them

Dating a twin doesnt mean you're going to be parent-trapped (and if you can't tell your partner apart from their sibling, that's not a good look on you)

Some twins just go with the assumptions everyone else is making about them already and play into the stereotype, especially as kids

Literally every fictional pair of identical twins are tricksters already. Come up with something original.

Twins can still be compelling characters without leaning on these tropes

Writing a compelling pair of identical twins doesn't have to be hard if you either write them like other siblings, or understand that the stereotypes that circulate in fiction are some of the biggest issues they struggle against. Here are some good examples of compelling twin plots that I can think of, though not all of these characters are twins or identical:

Mabel's fear at the end of Gravity Falls that growing up meant that her brother would grow apart from her

Stanley Pines struggling to measure up to his parent's favoritism of his brother throughout childhood, but still dedicating his adult life to getting him back when he went missing

Ty Lee running away to join the circus so she could have an identity outside of her parents' curated "matched set" of siblings in AtLA

Vash and Knives in Trigun '99 experiencing the same childhood traumas and interpreting them differently, coming away from them with opposing ideologies in adulthood

Hikaru and Kaoru's trauma over being told they were interchangeable and their desire to find someone who would treat them as individuals in Ouran High School Host Club

[melbatron5000]

Minisode connections, again

I'm working on decoding the chiastic structure of Good Omens season 2. It's taking a long time because there's a bunch of crap going on -- not the least of which is I think I found two different structures, so that's fun -- also, I have to work and do human stuff, so I can't just sit around working on Good Omens all day, every day.

But something I noticed while counting beats to find the middle (middleS, plural, but that's another meta):

It's already been pointed out by others that the magic act in the Nazi Zombie Flesheaters minisode echoes the Big Break Up and Kiss scene -- which it certainly does.

But the Restoring Job's Kids to Life in Front of a Bunch of Angels scene also echoes both of those scenes.

First and foremost, they are all around sixty beats long. (About the same rate as a resting human heartbeat, interestingly. What else is 60 beats per minute, I wonder?)

Second, in each scene, something (someone) signals the start of it. In Job, the angels applaud just before Aziraphale enters late. In 1941, Mrs. H tells Aziraphale to get on with it. In the Kiss scene, the Metatron tells Aziraphale to go and tell his friend the good news.

In all three scenes, Aziraphale enters stage right and turns to his left.

In Job, Crowley murmurs to Sitis, "trust me." In 1941, Aziraphale mouths to Crowley, "trust me." I think in the Kiss scene, "trust me" is more implied by both of them. It starts out murmured, then gets mouthed, and by the end, is unspoken entirely.

In all three scenes, Aziraphale explains to Crowley what needs to happen. "It would be really helpful if you were an expert on human births. Gabriel here witnessed the first human birth." "Aim for my mouth, shoot past my ear." "He said I could appoint you as an angel."

In all three scenes, Crowley takes a shot and Aziraphale backs him up. Job: "Reach into his robes and pull out three ribs." *Aziraphale miracles the kids into kids again.* 1941: *Shoots the gun at Aziraphale* *Aziraphale catches the bullet* *Kisses Aziraphale to give him the records from Heaven.* "I forgive you."

All three scenes end with Aziraphale having successfully fooled his audience.

Now, I already figured out that the scenes that are supposed to parallel the Resurrectionists minisode are missing. Even Crowley knows they're missing. Time has jumped forward past some important events. I don't know what was supposed to happen to echo Resurrectionists, but something is, and it's gone. I think it matters, though. Otherwise, why would we have this:

All three minisodes on the matchbox. The box itself is from the Resurrectionists pub, it has a verse from Job on it, and the verse is 41:19 -- or, if you reverse the numbers Verlan style (which is like Pig Latin, but what they do in France -- thank you @noneorother!) 1941. I strongly suspect the verse itself may very well have to do with the missing scenes that should mirror the Resurrectionists minisode.

But I wonder why Job, 1941, and the Kiss all line up and echo each other, while the Resurrectionists is the odd one out. I feel like whatever scenes have been jumped over probably line up with something big and important that happens elsewhere in the story. Threes are very important in storytelling, a rule that should never be bent or broken. I really wonder HOW the missing scenes got jumped over -- did God do it? Did Aziraphale or Crowley do something which caused it? Given how Crowley reacts to it happening, I would say if so it was inadvertent. Is time out of whack for some reason? It keeps jumping forward, why is that? Did someone else force them past the missing scenes? Ugh, I don't know.

Several people have pointed out to me now that the 1941 minisode has a lot of wedding night symbolism in it, and I see that the Job minisode has a lot of first date symbolism in it, too! Ha! Including Crowley and Aziraphale out in the desert by themselves when they encounter Job talking to God -- what the heck were they doing out there? Making out, maybe? Is that why Aziraphale comes rushing in through the door late when the other angels arrive? Busy smooching your new crush, Aziraphale? The Kiss scene seems to be a divorce, but it's actually a long-married couple who can read each other like a book being forced apart.

So if Job is a first date, and 1941 is a wedding, and the Kiss is a (forced) divorce, what is the Resurrectionists? What comes between a first date and a wedding? Traditionally, in love stories, a break-up has to come between those things. But other than Crowley being dragged back to Hell and forcing them separate, and then their argument over the holy water when he comes back, I'm not sure I see Resurrectionists as representing a break up. Does it? Maybe . . . ? And maybe more important, what comes after a wedding but before a divorce? Would we say kids? Mundanity and boredom? Infidelity? Given that it's a forced divorce, I wouldn't say those last two things. But kids then? What else could it be? Hmm.

Does the Resurrectionists minisode and whatever its missing echo is have to do with that progression in a relationship? Or given that Job, 1941, and the Kiss all echo beautifully and Resurrectionists does not, is that something outside their relationship and the progression of it?

Anyhow. More investigative work to be done here.

In between doing alive human stuff, I'm on the case.

[honeyjars-sims]

Chapter 3 Prologue: This Must Be the Place

Johnny’s eyes were fixed on the mirror as he clumsily attempted to knot his tie. “Ugh, I can't get this right,” he mumbled.

"Let me help.” Solomon took the ends of the tie from his son's trembling hands.

“Feeling nervous?”

“A little,” Johnny admitted. “I don’t know why, though.” The feeling was more similar to excitement than anxiety but he was still surprised at how jittery he was. “It’s a big day!” David interjected. “I think everyone gets a bit nervous when they get married.” “I know I was a mess!” Solomon laughed at the memory. “Remember how I could barely get any words out during our vows?”

“I do." David placed his hand on Solomon's cheek. “You were so cute.” “Well that makes me feel better.” Johnny was relieved to know he wasn’t alone in having pre-wedding jitters. “You have nothing to worry about, son." Solomon smiled. “You’re about to marry the love of your life.”

“Everyone decent?” Chantal’s head appeared around the door frame, her hand shielding her face. “As decent as we can be! Johnny replied. “I was told to give you this." Chantal handed him a letter.

“Who’s it from?” Chantal rolled her eyes. "The President." “Oh, great, I was hoping he'd get back to me.” Johnny recognized the print on the envelope as the same one used for the wedding invitations, which he knew wasn't by accident.

He and [redacted] had squabbled over which design to go with for weeks before Johnny finally relented. "Fine, you can have your boring-ass white invitations if you want them that bad!" He'd yelled, and after a few seconds of silence they'd both dissolved into fits of laughter. Who could have imagined he'd be so passionate about stationary of all things? It was such a silly disagreement that it became a recurring joke anytime they had a difference of opinion during wedding planning.

“We’ll give you a moment,” Solomon told Johnny as he and the others exited the room. Johnny began reading the letter:

John, my love, Words can’t express how excited I am that today is our wedding day. When we first met I never would have imagined that we'd end up here, but now I can't picture anyone I'd rather have standing by my side. We've both grown so much since then and I know it's because we bring out the best in each other. There's so much more I want to tell you, but I'm saving it for my vows. I just couldn't pass up the opportunity to use this envelope one last time! With all my love, [redacted]

“Johnny.” Solomon leaned against the door frame. “It’s time.” As Johnny made his way to the ceremony, he couldn’t help but think back to how it all began. How he had gone from one of the lowest points in his life to the highest in what seemed like such a short amount of time.

He wasn’t the same man today as he’d been back then, but he was grateful for where the journey started. He didn’t know it then, but all of that pain led him right here where he needed to be.

To the one he was meant to be with.

Previous | Beginning of story | Beginning of chapter | Next

This Must be the Place (Naive Melody)--The Talking Heads

Home is where I want to be Pick me up and turn me round I feel numb, born with a weak heart I guess I must be having fun

The less we say about it the better Make it up as we go along Feet on the ground, head in the sky It's okay, I know nothing's wrong, nothing

Hi yo, I got plenty of time Hi yo, you got light in your eyes And you're standing here beside me I love the passing of time

Never for money, always for love Cover us and say goodnight Say goodnight

Home is where I want to be But I guess I'm already there I come home, she lifted up her wings I guess that this must be the place

I can't tell one from another Did I find you, or you find me? There was a time before we were born If someone asks, this where I'll be, where I'll be

Hi yo, we drift in and out Hi yo, sing into my mouth Out of all those kinds of people You got a face with a view

I'm just an animal looking for a home, and Share the same space for a minute or two And you love me 'til my heart stops Love me 'til I'm dead Eyes that light up, eyes look through you Cover up the blank spots Hit me on the head

[moondustpugh]

The Hate Formula

Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader

Summary: Living in the same building, across from each other shouldn't be much of a problem, right? But how come you and Joe tend to always push each other's buttons every day? Is it because you both truly just hated each other or is it because there was something more to it?

Author's Note: Alexa play Guilty as Sin? by Taylor Swift. 👀

Disclaimer: 18+, smut

Wordcount: 4K

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five - part six - part seven - part eight - part nine - part ten

The night started off slow. It wasn’t like you were expecting anything exciting that could happen on this blind date. In fact, you were sort of dreading it, but you already have promised Sara that you were going to try. It wasn’t just for you. You were doing this for her too. You knew that you have been such a pain in her ass, and the fact that you both were close to getting kicked out of your apartment was also your fault. Blind dates weren’t really your thing, but if it meant getting out of the apartment building and not seeing Joe, then you would do it. 

For you and for Sara. 

Staring at yourself in front of your tall mirror, you fixed the strap of your dress before grabbing your coat and purse. Garrett was waiting for you outside in your living room, and you were sort of nervous to finally meet him. Walking out of your bedroom, you found Sara and Garrett talking and laughing together. Then, the room went silent when they heard your room door open. You saw as Garrett gave you a smile, his green eyes studying you before he slowly walked towards you. 

“Hi.” He smiled. 

Sara introduced the both of you together as you gave him a small smile and said, “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“You too. I heard a lot about you from Sara.” Garrett turned to Sara and gave her a smile. 

“Good things, I hope.” 

Sara and Garrett chuckled softly as he replied, “Great things, actually.”

Pursing your lips, you felt the blood rushed to your cheeks as Garrett and Sara exchanged looks before he offered you his arm. 

“Shall we?” He asked.

Shifting your eyes to Sara, you saw the excited grin on her face as you nodded your head and slid your hand on Garrett’s forearm. Walking you out of the apartment building, Garrett opened the passenger door for you as you thanked him and slid yourself inside the car. You took a deep breath and settled on your seat as Garrett walked around and slid himself in the driver’s side. You didn’t know how to really start the conversation. You were never good at dating. You were never good at talking to men, and you were always awkward or flustered. 

As Garrett drove towards the restaurant, you were glad that he was more talkative than you. He would tell you things about himself and what he did for work, while you just smiled and listened. You would also share some things about your job and some hobbies you would do outside of the office, but you found yourself still feeling a bit closed off towards him. You weren’t sure if you were just nervous tonight, or you just weren’t too interested in him. 

“Do you like to go hiking?” Garrett asked you later that night at the restaurant. 

“Um… not really.” You suppressed a chuckle. “I’m not really an outdoor person.”

See, that was one of the things you have picked up on as you continued to get to know Garrett. He seemed to like different things than you, but you couldn’t help but scold yourself to stop judging him so much already. Even if he had different interests, he was still kind and a gentleman. You needed to stop making excuses just because this was your first blind date.

As the night went on, the both of you had found yourselves in a bar, drinking and talking. You felt a little looser now that alcohol was now dominating your system. You were more talkative and found yourself a little more touchy and flirty with Garrett.

“Did you know I was kind of hesitant about this?” You whispered in Garrett’s ear, making him grin. 

“It’s alright. Sara had mentioned, but I was feeling the same.” He replied. “But I thought you were really pretty and Sara had been saying nice things about you. I had to take my chances.”

You laughed softly as you felt Garrett’s two hands sliding on your waist. He was sitting on the stool by the bar, and you were standing between his legs, your arms wrapped around his neck. His green eyes were glassy from all the alcohol that he had been drinking, and you could feel your cheeks flushed as he studied you carefully. You were now just realizing as you stared at him, your faces inches from each other, that he was actually attractive. Sara was right. She always knew your type and knew how to pick the men for you even when you wouldn’t agree with her at the beginning. 

Maybe this could be something good in your life. 

Then, as you grabbed your glass of martini from the counter, you drank the rest of it and felt Garrett’s lips pressing soft kisses on your jaw. You smiled, setting the glass down and pulled him close to you. 

“Do you want to go somewhere else?” Garrett whispered in your ear, his lips pressing soft kisses on your cheek. 

You let out a soft hum and whispered, “Your place?”

Garrett immediately grinned and got up from his seat, paying the bartender before intertwining his fingers with yours. Your brain was already a bit hazy. You couldn't remember how you ended up at Garrett’s place so quickly. You just felt both of your grabby hands tugging on each other’s clothes, and your naked body in his bed. A soft moan escaped your lips as he towered over you and kissed down your neck and down to your chest. His hand softly squeezed your breast before sucking on your nipple. You could barely open your eyes as he licked and kissed down your stomach, making you arch your back. 

Pushing your legs to open them wider, Garrett didn’t take his time before you found his mouth sucking and licking your wet clit as you moaned his name softly. Your mind was spinning as he continued to eat you out. Your mind wasn’t anywhere in the room anymore, especially when you felt Garrett pushed himself inside of you and thrusted deeper and faster. 

“You’re so tight, baby.” He groaned softly as he continued thrusting roughly. 

You could feel your legs tremble from his rough thrusts, digging your nails on his back. He continued to thrust inside you as you closed your eyes, feeling your head spin even more from everything that was happening. You moaned softly, burying your face on his shoulder. You were panting hard when he flipped you over, and you found yourself on your knees. Your moans echoed in his room as he thrusted himself back inside of you from behind.

“Garrett—” You whimpered as he roughly continued to thrust.

His pace was faster, rougher. His hand smacked your bare ass, making you whimper again and feeling your legs tremble. Flipping you over again, Garrett towered over you, kissing your red lips.

“God, you feel so good.” Garrett groaned. “Come for me, beautiful.”

Panting hard, you scratched your nails down his bare back as both of your pleasures crashed together at the same time. Your legs tightly wrapped around his hips and both of your bodies tremble in pleasure. Catching his breath, Garrett collapsed his body against your flushed one. You smiled softly as he kissed you again passionately on the lips. 

Not far too long, sleep took over you quickly. 

It wasn’t the first time where you went on a date and all you did was end up having sex with the man. Though, when you had woken up the next morning next to Garrett, you sort of felt bad over the fact that you barely paid attention to what he was saying last night about himself. You could tell he was trying his best to get to know you and open up himself up to you, but your mind was somewhere else. You couldn’t admit it last night to yourself because you were too busy trying to deny the thoughts of it, but your mind kept switching back to the thought of Joe. 

It irritated you, honestly. 

Because why the fuck were you thinking about Joe? Of all people, why did you keep thinking about him? It wasn’t even something specific. It was just the way Sara’s voice echoed in your mind about how you should go on a date to keep yourself busy other than getting your button pushed by Joe everyday. If you hated him so much, then why did you keep thinking about him when Garrett was literally moaning your name last night? 

“G’morning.” Your thoughts were interrupted by Garrett’s low and sleepy voice. 

You turned your head to face him and gave him a small smile, “Good morning.” 

Pushing the thoughts away, you pulled the duvet close to your chest and got up from the bed. The night was over. The date was over. You needed to get out of there before your thoughts could betray you again. You were quick to slide your clothes on your body and when you turned around, you saw Garrett sat on the bed and staring at you. 

“What?” You asked, giving him a shy smile. 

“I had a great time last night.” Garrett said. 

You felt your heart racing inside your chest as you walked over to him and sat at the edge of the bed. For a moment, you let your eyes wander on his facial features. Your index finger slowly slides down his chest and down to his stomach, tracing the hills and valleys of his muscles. 

“Me too.” You murmured. 

“I want to take you out on a date again.” Garrett leaned close to you, pressing a soft kiss on your lips. 

“Okay. Just let me know when.” You smiled and leaned in to kiss him softly. “I’ll see you.” 

Just like that, you got up from your bed, grabbed your coat and purse and walked out the door. There was that guilt feeling that was brewing up inside of you as you sat on the subway that morning. You needed to stop putting your attention somewhere else that didn’t matter and focused it somewhere where it actually did. 

Besides, even if you were thinking about Joe last night, it wouldn’t change the fact that he was an asshole and a player. He was always going to be like that since you first met him. You couldn’t change that about him even if you tried.

No one could change that about him. 

Walking inside your apartment building, you were taking your keys out of your purse when you saw your front door opened. Exiting out was Sara and a girl. You knitted your brows as you tilted your head towards the girl that she was with. 

She looked familiar. 

“Hey.” Sara’s eyes widened, frozen in her place by the doorway. “Y…You’re home early.”

Pursing your lips, you turned your head to the side and gave Sara a side eye. She looked like she was caught doing something illegal, and you didn’t know why. Was that why she sent you to a date with Garrett because she had a girl over the apartment? 

Then, the sound of a door opening behind you caught your attention. 

“Lucy?” You heard Joe’s voice as you looked over your shoulder and saw him standing there with a surprised look on his face. 

Lucy?

You furrowed your brows as you turned your head back to Sara and towards the girl, who’s apparently named Lucy. 

Lucy? Lucy? Lucy?

Your eyes widened, your lips parting, your jaw dropping to the floor when you realized who it was. 

That was why she looked familiar to you! You have seen Lucy before! 

You bumped into her one time in the hall when you were coming back home from work. She was exiting Joe's apartment, and she was one of the girls that was about to burst into tears when she was walking out the door. 

“Ohmygod.” You whispered. 

You let out a snort before clamping a hand over your mouth to stop yourself from laughing. Immediately, you saw Sara’s eyes rolling towards the back of her head as she intertwined her fingers with Lucy’s and passed between you and Joe.

“Ignore them. Let me walk you out.” Sara told Lucy. 

Joe was still standing by his front door, looking dumbfounded from what he just saw. As soon as Sara and Lucy were out of earshot, you dropped your hand from your mouth and started laughing. Joe furrowed his brows at you as you continued to laugh in front of his face, tears were literally almost spilling out of the corner of your eyes. Joe, on the other hand, didn’t look too entertained. 

“You know what that means?” You laughed, taking a step forward towards Joe. 

Joe’s eyes studied the amusement in your expression, his face all rearranged from the way you were making fun of him. You could see the fire that was slowly raging inside of him, but you were enjoying this moment too much. No one was going to stop you from acting obnoxious in front of him since that was all he ever did to you all the time. 

“That means…” You paused, trying to control your laughter. “That means even your dick wasn’t satisfying enough.”

“Shut up.” Joe rolled his eyes, shaking his head. 

He couldn’t say anything as you continued to laugh at him, your face all flushed. It wasn’t until Sara had come back and immediately, her hand found your forearm and dragged you away from Joe. 

“Okay, that’s enough.” Sara muttered. 

You smirked at Joe, giving him a mocking sad pout, your index finger running down your cheek as if it was a tear rolling down your face. You continued to laugh until Sara had completely dragged you inside the apartment and closed the door behind her. Your laughter slowly died down as you took a deep breath and shook your head. You couldn’t even believe that this was happening right now. The look on Joe’s face somehow gave you some enjoyment after everything he had done to you. It was almost like karma knocking on his door. 

In this case, he found it across the hall. 

You turned to face Sara and saw the stern look on her face as she shook her head in disappointment, her hands finding her hips. 

“Is this why you sent me out to go on a date with Garrett?” You asked. 

You were still chuckling at what happened but then, you saw that Sara was actually upset and disappointed at your reaction. You stopped laughing and chuckling as you cleared your throat and composed yourself. 

“Yes, because I know you will make fun of it, and you’re going to rub it in Joe’s face every chance you get.” Sara answered. 

You cocked your head at her and said, “Sara, if you wanted to do that, you didn’t need to send me away. Just let me know.”

Sara paced in front of you for a moment, letting out a frustrated sigh as she rubbed her forehead. She didn’t want you to find out this way, but she had no choice now but to face what happened. 

“I would, but I know you.” Sara stated. “I know that you would use this to make fun of Joe!”

You let out a scoff and said, “So? He deserves it!”

“I actually like her, okay?” Sara argued, her eyes pleading at you. “So please, just… don’t be whatever you are with Joe.”

Now, wait a minute. What was that supposed to mean?

“Whatever I am with Joe? What’s that supposed to mean?” You furrowed your brows, folding your arms in front of your chest. 

“Please!” Sara rolled her eyes before giving you a look. “Do you think I don’t see it? The reason why you’re making all this trouble?”

For a moment, you were quiet as you gave her a side eye. You didn’t know what she was talking about or maybe you did, and you just didn’t want to admit it out loud. You weren’t making any trouble. In fact, it was Joe who was always pushing your buttons, so how was this your fault? How were you going to be the villain in this situation all the time, and Joe was always off the hook? 

Everyone was just being unfair. 

“I know you like him.” Sara’s words sent shivers down your spine. “That’s why you’re always so pissed whenever he comes home with a girl because from the moment you saw him in that hall on our first day here, you liked him!”

Suddenly, you felt exposed.

You felt called out, and you could hear your heart drumming in your ears. You could feel all the defensive emotions coming up in your throat. The fact that it was Sara who told you this in your face made it even worse. She was your best friend, and she was supposed to be on your side! 

Your mouth literally made an “O” as you tried to find the right counterargument for the ridiculous accusation that she just threw at you. 

She was wrong. 

Joe was nothing but just someone who loved to pester you, and you had enough of it. You had enough of everyone always taking his side too! 

“Yes, he’s attractive.” You admitted. “Yes, I did fall for him when I first met him but that was before I found out how much of a pig he is.” 

Sara shook her head in disbelief, smiling comically. She saw how you got all flustered the moment she called you out, and she knew that she was right. Your whole face was red and even your neck was flushed. You could barely make out a sentence. She knew she hit a sensitive spot in your emotions that you have been trying to hide for the last two years. 

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” Sara said sarcastically. “But please, don’t drag me into your mess with Joe. I actually like Lucy.” 

Defeated, you held your hands up in the air and said, “Fine.” 

Letting the warm water run down your skin later that day, you fluttered your eyes closed as you basked in the feeling of it. You let out a sharp breath and leaned against the marbled walls of your shower. Sara’s words from earlier echoed in your mind and then your mind shifted towards the thought of Garrett then back at Joe. To think of it, you did have a good time with Garrett last night even if your mind was somewhere else. He was nice and a gentleman, and he made you feel safe. There was nothing wrong with that, right? 

Maybe it was time for you to stop these nonsense thoughts and give Garrett a chance for once. Maybe this time, it would actually work out. Maybe Garrett could actually make you happy and treat you better than your past relationships. 

Walking out of the shower, you heard your phone vibrate from your bedside table. You wrapped your robe around your body and picked up your phone, seeing Garrett’s name on the screen. 

I had fun last night. Do you wanna go out next weekend?

Biting your lower lip, you gazed out the tall glass window in front of you for a moment and thought about your decision. It wouldn’t hurt to try. Maybe he could be the one for you. 

I had fun too! :) Sure, I’d love to.

Biting your nails, you watched as the three bubbles appeared on the screen indicating that Garrett was typing. You waited for what it felt like an eternity and finally, he replied. 

See you Saturday then. Pick you up at 7. 

This was good. This was a new thing in your life. You deserved to be happy too, so you decided to give this a chance. 

Flopping yourself on your bed, you stared at the ceiling and sighed. As you thought about Garrett, a small smile tugged on your lips. Your mind started pondering about what you should wear this weekend for your second date. It had been a while since you have gotten excited over a date, and you wanted the night to go well. 

However, as you went on with the week, you only heard from Garrett on Tuesday and then for some reason, his presence had disappeared. You weren’t sure what happened, and you just figured maybe he was busy at work. Sara had mentioned to you that he looked a bit stressed in the office when you had asked her about him. So, you decided to give him his space. Then when Saturday came, Garrett was sweet enough to come and pick you up. You couldn’t help but think how good he looked tonight. However, you sort of noticed something different in him. This time, it seemed like he was the one that was stuck in his mind. 

Dinner was nice. He took you to a fancy restaurant, and he made you laugh with his jokes this time. He talked to you and told you more about himself. You started opening up to him too. You told him about your family and how you weren’t good at dating, but you decided to give this a chance. Garrett couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“I’m lucky then.” He joked that made you blush in front of him. 

Though, you couldn’t help but wonder what happened this week for him to act a bit off. Even if you were enjoying dinner, you could tell there was something indifferent about him. 

“Work has been stressful?” You asked him that night when he took you for a walk at Central Park. 

“Kinda.” Garrett let out a sigh. 

Silence befell between you as you watched the kids run around the park. There was a summer lights show that was being set up at the park, and it looked beautiful during the night. 

“Is everything okay?” You paused in your tracks, taking his hand in yours gently.

You felt Garrett squeezed your hand softly and said, “I really am having fun with you, you know?”

“Me too.” You smiled. “I’m not gonna lie. Like I said before, I was sort of hesitant about this, but I am having fun with you.”

Garrett hung his head low, shaking his head before taking your other hand in his and squeezing them both softly. 

“What is it?” You tilted your head, cupping his cheek. 

His green eyes dimmed as he gazed up at you, looking into your eyes. “The thing is that… I just got out of a relationship, and I really thought I have moved on.”

“Yeah, Sara had mentioned that to me.” You caressed his cheek softly with your thumb as he leaned against your touch. “I understand. I know it takes a while to move on.”

Garrett hitched a breath, setting his hand over yours that was on his cheek. 

“The thing is that my ex called this week.”

You felt your heart pound inside your chest the moment you heard the sentence he just told you. 

Everything was starting to make sense.

“And she still wants to work things out. So, I’m not sure if this thing between us—” 

“No, it’s okay. I understand.” You cut him off as you slide your hand away from him, stepping back. 

“I’m really sorry.” Garrett apologized.

You could see the sympathetic look on his face, and you didn’t want to make him feel guilty about this. You have been in this situation before, and you knew how hard it was to move on from another person, especially when they have been a big part of your life. 

“I understand.” You gave him a small, understanding smile. 

“I didn’t mean to lead you on like this.”

“It’s okay. There’s no need to explain.” You took a deep breath as you both started walking down the park again. “I had fun with you. I think maybe it’s not the right time yet.”

“Yeah.” Garrett gave you a small smile. 

As you both continued down the park, you gazed up at the sky, seeing the twinkling stars above you. You wondered maybe it was the Universe telling you that Garrett wasn’t just the right man for you. That even if you had tried to open yourself up, maybe he just wasn’t meant for you. 

You tried to lean into the comfort of that thought as Garrett walked you back to your apartment that night. 

Maybe there was just someone better for you out there. 

*******

Taglist:

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[kevinsdsy]

I'll gladly elaborate, alright I'm gonna start off by getting the obvious out of the way. SPOILERS FOR TSC.

first off, they were both subjected to SA in some relation to the Ravens. We now know that Drake was sent by Riko, and my guess/assumption is that he did it to force Andrew's hand like how Grayson did for Jean to get his number.

Andrew threatens and has harmed others that touch him because of Drake. Jean does the same albeit it being on reflex. Both of them harmed themselves because of this trauma. They both refuse to elaborate on their feelings and thoughts, they have minimal and expressions and operate on a sort of "auto pilot" Andrew not AS much since he wasn't basically forced to be a machine, since he never joined them but while he was on meds he was a sort of manic which I think counts all things considered.

In terms of Neil, he's the only one for both (pre-Jeremy in Jean's case) where he didn't require them to speak for him to understand them. He was the first to respect their boundaries without questions and he may be Andrew's partner/soulmate but he was also, as Jean describes, Jean's misplaced forever partener/unkept promise.

I used mirror instead of parallel because these similarities aren't enough for me to say they tie to each other in the narrative but they do have meaningful (TO MEEEEEEEEE) similarities because of Perfect Court that I haven't seen people acknowledge 😭

WAITTT ALL OF THESE MAKE SO MUCH SENSE thank you for elaborating btw 🙏🏼🙏🏼 especially because u mentioned “jean does the same albeit it being on reflex” like i do think their reactions to both hurting others and themselves might be a bit different, but obviously it’s still a similarity.

NEIL to both andrew and jean is SO PERSONAL TO ME. like just in general neil’s relationship/dynamic with them makes me go absolutely insane

[hunnysnoops]

˗ˋ𝕎𝕙𝕚𝕥𝕖 𝕋𝕖𝕖𝕥𝕙 𝕋𝕖𝕖𝕟𝕤ˊ˗

Chapter Eight: Smoke Breaks

Kyle Broflovski x fem reader

And it's more a question of when than a question of if, since that night you hopped out of my car, left behind your American Spirits and I keep a lighter in my pocket at all times 'cause never know when you'll need one.

Premise: Summer is kicking off a little duller than you anticipated but there’s still time to turn it around.

Warnings: crude language and humour

MASTERLIST

You sit in the hard, plastic chair, your fingers cramped around the pen as you scrawl your answers onto the biology exam paper. The classroom is a hushed sea of students, the only sounds are the faint rustling of paper and the ticking of the clock. You glance to your right, where Kyle is hunched over his desk, scribbling furiously.

It had been easy enough thanks to the absurd amount of caffeine pills you had been taking the entire week to be sure you had studied enough. Now you were flying through the exam, barely even looking at the question before an answer popped into your head.

Your eyes flicker back to your paper and all the topics you've crammed for in the past week blur together. You can feel the pressure, the weight of this exam that will determine so much. Kyle shifts slightly in his seat, and you wonder if he's feeling the same as you though it was hard to tell with how he always had his eyebrows drawn together like every thought running through his head was a worry.

There was a certain feeling of dread that came with the last week of school, it was like the last day of summer camp when you had no idea when you would be seeing the people you had spent so much time with next. You didn't know what you would do with your summer, likely spend it going for runs in the afternoon, working for shitty tips until ten, and then staying up until your eyes sting and turn bloodshot.

You scribble down your final answer, a sense of both relief and anxiety washing over you. You look up, and there's Kyle, setting his pencil down at the exact same moment. It's uncanny how often this happens, how often the two of you mirror each other in these small but significant ways. It never failed to creep you out.

You and Kyle push your chairs back simultaneously, the screech of metal on linoleum synchronizing like the final chord of a symphony. You stand up, and so does he, both of you gathering your papers and heading to the front of the room.

Head craned to look at him as he walked parallel to you, you picked up your pace so you could be the first to turn in your exam. He didn't try to race you to the front, just quirked an eyebrow watching you rush your way up to Mr. Waterman's desk and slam the booklet of questions down, turning around to see if he was gaining on you. He was not.

"Wow, done already?" Mr. Waterman asks with a slight smile, keeping his voice down. Next to you, Kyle stands and turns his papers into the teacher, glancing at you. "You too Kyle? Nice work, guys."

"Thanks," You press your lips into a thin smile, waiting for the approval to leave.

Mr. Waterman glances at the clock above the door "You two are good to go unless you want to take another look over your exam."

"I'm okay," Kyle says, voice hardly above a whisper so as not to bother the other students.

"Okay well," Mr. Waterman clicks around on his computer for a moment before looking back at the both of you "All of your assignments are finished, tests written, so in case I don't see you again keep an eye out for your results and have a good summer," He smiles.

"You too," You give him a little wave as you leave the class, Kyle trailing not far behind you. When he slowly shut the door behind the both of you, you spoke up "I can't believe I finished first," You smiled up at Kyle. Wendy would've been the first to finish had she not left a week early for a trip and written her exams prior.

"You finished first?"

"Yeah?" You say "Why are you saying it like that?"

He shrugs "Pretty sure we finished at the same time."

"Nuh-uh."

"Yuh-huh."

"Kyle?" You ask, sweetening your tone.

"Yeah?"

"I finished first, let me have this."

He raises his hands in defence "Okay, you finished first, good job."

"Thanks!" You smile. You search for something else to say to fill the gap of silence "Erm, so I guess we're done with Biology."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Yup, guess so," You nod awkwardly, paraphrasing his words and wanting to maul yourself for it.

"Hey, what are you doing tonight?" Kyle asks, his tone is casual but with an edge of something else, something that makes your pulse quicken.

"Nothing much," You reply, trying to sound equally casual. "I work like every night after today so I think I'm just gonna relax. You?"

He smiles, and for a moment, you think he's going to say something more, something significant. "Cool, I have to work."

You try not to let your face drop despite the disappointment you were struck with. Part of you thought he would ask to hang out or go for a drive but you shouldn't have expected so much. "Oh, sick."

He nods "Uh, are you coming back for I days?" I days were for students who had missing or incomplete assignments, they would be forced to come in the following week to finish them off while the other students got to enjoy the start of their summer and only return for the final day where report cards were received.

"Nah, are you?"

"Nope."

You didn't really know how to talk to Kyle when there wasn't school involved or some high-pressure situation where lives were on the line. It always felt stiff without arguing "What answer did you get on question twenty-three? the one about decomposition."

"Uh," He runs a hand through his curls "I don't remember, sorry."

"No, it's fine, I already wrote it, so," You take a small breath in "Yeah."

"Do you think you did okay?" he asks, glancing at you with those hazel eyes that seem to cut right through you. You shrug, trying to muster a nonchalant tone.

"Probably. Some parts were tough, but it's over now, right?" Your voice sounds strange to your ears, higher pitched, a bit too enthusiastic. You cringe internally but hope he doesn't notice. "How about you?"

Kyle chuckles softly, rubbing the back of his neck. "Honestly, I don't know. That last essay question really threw me off."

"Yeah, same here," you reply, laughing a little too loudly. You cringe internally, but Kyle doesn't seem to notice. He smiles but you don't seem to catch it, eyes focused on the ground and mind trying to decode why you were acting so humiliating.

Kyle nods, shoving his hands into his pockets, his shoulders hunching slightly. The two of you walk in awkward silence for a moment, the sound of your footsteps merging with the distant chatter of other students. You steal a glance at him, noticing the way his hair falls into his eyes, and the curve of his lips as he looks down at the ground. "Hey, Kyle-

"Hey, Kyle!" Before you can even finish your sentence you're cut off by Leslie, she's digging around in her locker and smiling at the two of you, sticking one hand out to wave at Kyle.

He glances at you like he is waiting for approval "Go ahead, I gotta go this way anyways, I parked at the back," You lie through your teeth, you had parked in your usual spot in the front lot.

"Really?" He lets out a breath "See you on game night?"

"Okay, cool, well, see you whenever."

Before he can say anything else you begin to walk down the first hallway you see. It took you an extra seven minutes to walk through the labyrinth of corridors and then walk your way back to the front where your car was waiting for you. By the time you inside of it, you wanted to punch your window shield.

Heat rose to your cheeks, eyes wide "Fuck!" You shouted, slamming your head down into the car horn and leaving it there to let the awful sound ring out and draw attention to your embarrassment.

New Message- Red 🧌🔫

You: wyd

Red 🧌🔫: bed rotting

You: wanna hang out?

Red 🧌🔫: just got off work

Red 🧌🔫: so no

You: Boooooooo

Lately, you had been trying to ignore the feeling of loneliness that threatened to creep up over you. You spent the entire first week of summer by yourself and whoever offered up small talk at work. It wasn't as easy to pretend that you liked the solitude as you had imagined. While everyone else was filling up your social media feeds with pictures of them on vacation and out with friends, you had been coming home from your serving shifts covered in sweet chilli mayo, hair a mess from the misters your boss installed on the patio where you ran back and forth to attend to tables.

Now you were freshly showered and laying in bed, trying to figure out what you wanted to do with your night before the sunset. You didn't want to spend another night alone with your eyes turning bloodshot red from the blue light cast off your phone.

So far everyone you had reached out to had plans though you didn't stop digging through your contacts.

New Message: Nichole 💕

You: Wanna do something?

Nichole 💕: Right now?

You: Yeah

Nichole 💕: Srry bb, I can't

Nichole 💕: Tuesday?

You: Fo sho

You glance around, taking in the posters on your walls, the books stacked haphazardly on your desk with binders you no longer needed, the photos of friends and family. Your gaze lingers on a picture of you and Bebe from last summer, both of you grinning widely, arms slung around each other's shoulders. A pang of something hits you square in the chest, before you can even process what emotion you're feeling you snatch the photo off the wall and crumple it up, tossing it across the room.

With a sigh, you flop back onto your bed, staring up at the ceiling. The fan spins lazily above you, and you let your thoughts drift, trying to make sense of the jumble of emotions swirling inside you. You were convinced adults were lying when they said these were the best years of your life.

It's been a few days since that awkward walk from school with Kyle, and you haven't seen him since. You hadn't even texted him but kept checking to see if he had sent anything, the answer was no. Your chat hadn't been touched since the night of the lock-in. You replay your conversations in your head like you were performing an autopsy, wondering if you missed some hidden meaning, some unspoken truth. Whatever, it didn't matter, you just needed someone to hang out with so you could stop dissecting things that were already irreversible.

New Message- McWhoremick

You: Hey Kenny

McWhoremick: Who's this?

You: ?

McWhoremick: He's busy

Okay so, Red was tired, Nichole was preoccupied, Kenny was getting laid, and you were still alone. This didn't seem fair. You glance around, taking in the posters on your walls, the books stacked haphazardly on your desk, binders from the school year you no longer needed, the photos of friends and family. Your gaze lingers on a picture of you and Bebe from last summer, both of you grinning widely, arms slung around each other's shoulders. A pang of something hits you square in the chest though you shake it off and quickly reach to tear the photo off the wall.

New Message- Annie!!!!!

You: Annnnnie

Annie!!!!!: Yesssssss?

You: Want to do something?

Annie!!!!!: I have to leave early tomorrow for a road trip :/

You: Aw man

You: Have fun

Annie!!!!!: Omg but when I see you again I need to tell you what happened with Ashley

Now it was getting a little sad. You always thought you were fine with being alone until you were actually alone, when the invites to sleepovers and parties stopped rolling in it was like you had been locked up in isolation. You wait, your phone clutched tightly in your hand. Minutes pass, each one feeling longer than the last. One by one, the replies trickle in or they simply don't come at all.

New Message- Heidi🦆

You: Hey

Heidi🦆: Hiiiii

You: Are you busy?

Heidi🦆: Yeah :(

You: Bummer

New Message- Dildo Faggins (Tolkien)

You: Hey

Dildo Faggins (Tolkien): Hey

You: What are you doing?

Dildo Faggins (Tolkien): On a date 🤠

You: Sweet

You: Have fun!!!

Dildo Faggins (Tolkien): Will do

New Message- Craig

You: hey

Craig: What

You: what are you doing?

Craig: With Tweak

"Shit," You mutter. The loneliness hits you all at once like liquor on an empty stomach. You put your phone down before you quickly grab it again, scrolling through social media, but it only makes you feel worse. Everyone seems to be having fun, their lives filled with parties, dates, and adventures.

You consider your options. You could stay in, watch a movie, maybe read a book. But the thought of spending the evening alone in your room feels unbearable. You need to get out, even if it's just for a little while. If you were so interesting and funny then why were you on your own?

After another ten messages are either left unanswered or rejected you start to consider your final option.

New Message- Uncle Richie

You: Wanna hang out?

Uncle Richie: ??????

Uncle Richie: dude it's seven pm on a saturday

Uncle Richie: you should be with your friends

You: So is that a yes or a no?

Uncle Richie: bruh

Uncle Richie: no

You: What

You: Why?

Uncle Richie: because I actually have plans kid

"Oh, fuck this," You throw your phone down onto your mattress, running your hands down your face. Uncle Richie had plans and you didn't. If Wendy was in town you would've asked her though she probably would've been doing something with Stan.

You can hear faint sounds from your brother's room across the hallway. You get up and head to his room, pushing the door open without knocking. Weston is sitting at his computer, hood pulled over his head and a sickening energy drink beside him, headphones on, engrossed in a video game. His fingers move rapidly over the keyboard one hand on the mouse.

He doesn't even acknowledge your presence until you plop down onto his navy blue bed. Weston turns around, doing a double take and with a groan moves one of the earcups away so he can hear you "Bruh, get out."

"I can't," you sigh "I'm too heavy."

"Yeah, I can tell." Weston looks back at his game, bringing his mic close to his mouth "Sorry, dude, my sister just came in," Someone on the other end says something and his face contorts in disgust "No, she's not hot," His nose wrinkles up "Gross, Ike, don't say that."

From your view of his unmade bed, you can look past the overpriced gaming chair he got for Christmas, you can see he's playing one of those cookie-cutter online shooter games. Your gaze glances to the hamster cage sitting on top of his dresser, a little grey and white Siberian hamster lazily burrowed inside. Slinking off the bed you walk over to the cage, hit with the smell of bedding and god knows what. Slowly, you open the latch and as gently as the summer breeze you place him in the palm of your hand and go to sit on the edge of your brother's bed.

"Hey," Weston catches you in his peripheral, pulling his mic away from his mouth "Are you holding Mr. Worldwide?"

"Yeah," You say, gingerly stroking the top of the little hamster who gives no indication of whether she enjoys it or not.

"Put her down," He shoots you a dirty look whilst trying to keep up with his team on the game.

"No, she likes me more than you."

"Ike, shut up," He exasperates, ignoring your comment completely. You can see him visibly tensing up as his character begins to sway and rock every time it's shot. Weston tries to shoot the opposing player but in turn, his screen slowly fades to red as his character drops to the ground "Fuck!" He slams his fist down onto the desktop. He swerves his head back to look at you "Don't you have people your own age to bother?"

"No," You say, honestly.

Weston sucks a sharp breath through his teeth "Maybe you should get on that and make some friends instead of harassing your brother."

"Maybe you should take a shower," you retort.

"I showered this morning," He pulls up the collar of his shirt to smell inside and wrinkles his nose at the smell.

"Doesn't smell like it," You stand from the bed and place the hamster next to your brother's keyboard. "Do you wanna go to the movies or something?"

"Jeez, are you really that lonely?" His mocking tone carries the slightest bit of sympathy, something you never thought he had.

"Pfft, no, get out of here, man." You wave him off.

"You're in my room!" He shouts, his face turning red as he does so. "God, I wish I had a normal sister."

"I wish I had a hygienic brother," You say as you shut the door behind you. Your own brother didn't even want to spend time with you and he wasn't even bountiful in company. Making your way down the stairs you head straight for the door.

"Jellybean, where are you going?" Your dad asks craning his neck to look at you from his spot on the couch.

"Just going to Red's for a bit," You lie. You were truthfully going for a drive to smoke but it seemed a little less sad when you smeared the truth.

"Finally, you're seeing the sun," he jokes, a smile breaking onto his face like he had struck comedy gold "Have fun, text me if you decide to stay over."

"Kay, love ya," You grab your keys from the little dish on the mantel, heading out the door.

"Love you, Jellybean," Your dad was quick to turn his attention back to Facebook where he did not fail to comment on every post he saw.

The warm air is beginning to fade into something cooler as you walk to your car. The familiar scent of the interior greets you as you slide into the driver's seat, and you take a moment to just sit there, letting the silence envelop you.

Starting the engine, you pull out of the driveway and onto the quiet streets. You don't have a particular destination in mind, just a need to drive and clear your head. The hum of the engine and the rhythm of the road beneath your tires are soothing, a welcome distraction from the turmoil in your mind.

After driving aimlessly for a while, you pull into an empty parking lot overlooking a small park. The area is quiet, the streetlights casting a soft glow over the deserted playground and picnic tables. You reach into the glove compartment and pull out a pack of cigarettes, a habit you've been trying to kick for the past week after the hunt for nicotine almost gave you rabies but tonight feels like an exception.

You light one, the flicker of the lighter briefly illuminating your face. The first drag is harsh but familiar, the smoke curling up towards the open window. You exhale slowly, watching the smoke dissipate into the night air.

As you sit there, smoking and staring out at the park, your thoughts drift back to Kyle. You wonder what he's doing right now if he's thinking about you too. The uncertainty of your feelings for him weighs heavily on your mind.

You take another drag, trying to push the thoughts away, but they keep coming back. The memory of that awkward conversation after the exam, the unspoken words, the lingering glances—it all feels so confusing and frustrating.

Once again you're almost overcome with the urge to to slam your head against the dashboard, thinking of the embarrassment you had brought yourself. Had he noticed you being so sheepish? Did he really care? Probably not and that thought is not one that soothes you.

It wasn't like you to trip over words or wait by your phone all week just hoping for a text from him. You had thought you were becoming friends or at the very least something similar.

You liked to think that maybe he had been waiting for you to text him and not the possibility that you really didn't cross his mind until you were in front of him. Do you really have the right to sulk when you weren't doing anything for what you wanted?

You finish your cigarette, stubbing it out on the outside of your car, right beneath your window. You had done more than enough wallowing and didn't want to wait around any longer for something you wanted.

The restlessness in you intensifies, and instead of heading back home, you find yourself driving towards Kyle's house. For a moment you think about driving past and letting this simmer away with you but instead, you pull up into the road in front of his house. For a moment, you just sit there, the cool night air drifting in through the open window to be sure the smell of tobacco has elevated. You reach for your phone and shoot him a quick text.

New Message- Kyle Broflovski

You: Wanna hang out?

Kyle Broflovski: Now?

You: Yeah

Kyle Broflovski: Sure

You: Cool bc I'm outside ur house

The blinds of Kyle's bedroom are pulled open and curtains pushed aside, you can see him staring down at your car to be sure you were really there. You give him a little smile and wave. His eyebrows are furrowed in confusion, curls pushed down with black headphones. He quickly yanks the blinds shut again and retreats from the window.

Moments later, he slips through the front door, pulling a hoodie over his t-shirt while awkwardly jogging over to you. "Hey," He says, ducking into the passenger seat.

"Hey," You almost nervously tap the steering wheel "So, what do you want to do?"

"You texted me?" He phrases it like he's unsure.

"Yeah but that was kinda an impulsive thing, I was just going to listen to every Weezer song for fifteen hours, I didn't actually have anything planned."

"So why did you ask to hang out?"

"Because I wanted to do something," You try to say it as casually as possible even though you were writhing inside "Why did you come out?"

He shrugs "I dunno, I just wanted to see you."

"Yeah, okay," You turn away from him, trying to ignore the heat rising to your face "Did you eat dinner yet?"

"No."

"Okay, sweet let's do that then," You pull away from your stationary spot and begin rolling back down the road. This was hard for you. You had felt stupid for even trying to be friends with him and making small awkward conversations because neither of you would admit to the fact that you just wanted to be around each other and do things that friends do. "Your parent's home?"

"Yeah," he cracks a small smile "My mom didn't believe me when I told her that you texted me."

You suck a sharp breath through your teeth "I wouldn't believe you either."

Kyle furrows his eyebrows, glancing around the car "What's that smell?"

"Sorry, I was smoking in here earlier." You feel somewhat embarrassed. Maybe you should've sprayed some perfume to drown it out.

"No, it smells good, like coconuts and kiwi," He adds.

"I'm not from new Zealand but I just washed my hair." Without realizing it, your face brightened just the slightest. Thank god your mom had bought the wrong conditioner and left you smelling like a tropical thunderstorm "So."

"Oh," He turns his head to look out the window "Well it's nice."

"Thanks." You try your best to bite back a smile though the attempt fails miserably.

You grip the steering wheel a little tighter than usual, feeling the slight hum of the car beneath you as you navigate the quiet streets. Beside you, Kyle adjusts the radio, settling on a soft rock station. His presence is both comforting and nerve-wracking, a mix that sends your heart racing in a way you hope he doesn't notice.

"Your cars clean," he says, his voice somewhat staggered behind the statement

"Yeah, no shit," you reply, trying not to take offence. "What, you surprised?"

"A little." It was the first time he had ever been in your car, the only time you had been in his was a painfully quiet thirty-minute drive when you broke down on the highway and his parents forced him to pick you up.

You focus on the road ahead, but out of the corner of your eye, you watch him. The way he leans back, relaxed, one hand resting casually on his knee. You wonder if he can hear your heartbeat, loud and insistent in your chest.

As you pull up to a red light, the car idles quietly. Kyle turns to you, and for a moment, your eyes meet. There's a softness there, something unspoken that makes your breath hitch.

"You're a good driver," he says, a teasing lilt in his tone. "I always thought you'd get into a collision per mile."

"Yeah? Maybe I should get you one of those passenger princess stickers," you reply with a smile, trying to mask the warmth spreading across your cheeks.

The sky overhead is dusky, the sun falls back slowly behind the mountains leaving a pink hue in its place. The traffic is light, and the streets are calm, giving you time to savour the journey. The streetlights cast a gentle glow on the road, illuminating your path as you turn onto the main avenue.

"What's this?" You wrinkle your nose at the music blasting through the stereo. You scroll through your playlist and find the perfect track. The heavy, fast-paced beats of a metal song blare through the car's speakers, the vocalist's intense screams filling the space.

Kyle's eyes widen in shock, his fingers instinctively reaching for the volume knob. "What the hell is this?" he exclaims, his voice almost drowned out by the music.

You swat away his hand and turn it up instead "It's metal, it's good."

"Good?" he shouts back, wincing as the vocalist hits a particularly aggressive note. "I can't believe you listen to this shit."

"It's the same stuff Stan listens to."

"Doesn't mean it's good," He says "I think I'm gonna blow out an eardrum."

"You're just feeling the music very deeply,"

"Yeah, well, the only feeling I'm getting is a headache," Kyle grumbles, leaning back in his seat and shaking his head. "How do you listen to this?"

Months ago his whining would've had you shoving him out of the moving vehicle but now you just thought it was funny "So sorry I can't accommodate your delicate sensibilities."

"Delicate?" he scoffs. "I'm just not into... whatever this is."

You pull into the diner's parking lot, the neon sign flickering invitingly in the growing darkness. The gravel crunches under the tires as you find a spot near the entrance. Turning off the engine, you both sit for a moment, the sudden quietness filling the car like a shared secret.

"Let's go, matchstick," you say, breaking the silence and unbuckling your seatbelt.

"So we're not done with that nickname?"

"Nope, not until every ginger hair sheds off your skin."

"Wow, super poetic," His voice is flat.

"Always," you grin, opening the door and stepping out into the cool evening air. The smell of fried food wafts from the diner, making your stomach growl in anticipation.

Kyle joins you at the front of the car, hands in his pockets, looking around. "Think they'll have a table for us?"

"Only one way to find out," you reply, heading toward the entrance. Kyle falls into step beside you, his shoulder brushing against yours.

As you push open the door, the familiar bell jingles, announcing your arrival. The interior of the diner is cozy, with red vinyl booths and checkered floors. A jukebox in the corner plays an old rock tune, adding to the nostalgic atmosphere. The warm light casts a golden glow over everything, making the place feel inviting and homey.

It was the same diner that you used to frequent with Bebe though you liked it when you didn't think about it much. You and Kyle stand by the host stand, waiting to be seated. It was somewhat busy like you had expected it to be on a Saturday night in the summer.

A waitress with a friendly smile approaches, she was on the older side and had probably been working at that diner for longer than you'd been alive. "Hi, honey, I haven't seen you in so long."

"Hi, Sylvia," You smile in return, hands awkwardly clutched together.

"No Bebe?" Sylvia frowns just the slightest.

"No Bebe," You repeat to solidify the statement.

"Aw, that's too bad," She reaches into the host stand to grab menus "So, it's just you and your boyfriend?"

"Not my boyfriend, but, yeah," You rush to correct yourself, quickly looking at Kyle for a reaction though he didn't seem to care.

"I just call it as I see it," Sylvia gestures for the two of you to follow her "Right this way," she says, leading you to a booth near the window. You slide in opposite each other, the red vinyl squeaking slightly.

As you settle in, Kyle picks up a menu, scanning it quickly. "What do you usually get?"

You shrug "I dunno, depends on the day," You crane your head over to look at his menu, pointing at one item "You should get that one, you're a classic burger kinda guy."

"I am a classic burger kinda guy," He absentmindedly mutters under his breath, eyes hyper-focused on the menu. After a quick glance at the menu, you set it down, mind already made up on what you want to order. Kyle glances up at you "Already?"

"Yup," You nod "I'm kinda a big deal around here so I know the menu by heart," You joke, arms crossed while you lean back in the cushioned booth.

"Yeah, I believe it," Kyle says, placing his menu down and shrugging off his hoodie, letting it crumple beside him.

"Wait," You sit up slightly "What the hell do you mean by that?"

"Nothing?"

"You were supposed to be like 'Woah, I had no idea, I couldn't tell whatsoever,'" You deepen your voice to mimic his.

"I do not sound like that," His eyebrows raise slightly.

"You're right, your voice is way more irritating."

"Remind me why I'm having dinner with you."

"Probably because I'm so incredibly charismatic and charming that you couldn't possibly turn down my invitation."

"Nah, that doesn't sound right," He too leans back, matching your eye level.

You were prepared to shoot back with something equally snarky before your gaze shifted past Kyle and landed on a booth in the back of the restaurant. The smirk fell off your face completely watching Bebe laugh about something with Cylde sitting across from her doing the same "Oh my god, Kyle, look behind you."

"What?" He turns his head but you quickly reach forward and smack his arm.

"What are you doing? Don't look."

"Jesus," He mutters "Is it Bebe?"

"How did you know?"

"Because you're so insanely weird about her," He taps his fingers on the table.

"I'm not insanely weird about her, I'm averagely weird about her," You correct the statement as if it paints you in a better light.

"So are you going to keep staring at her or actually apologize?" He asks, trying to make eye contact though your gaze is locked on the blonde girl.

"I think I'll keep staring, thank you."

You were almost burning a hole into the side of Bebe's head for entirely too long. Nothing in the diner piqued your interest more than the upturn of her glossed lips when she laughed or how she pushed her curls away from her tanned face until you saw Kyle scrolling on his phone.

"What are you doing?" Your attention finally shifts back to him, settling back into your seat. "You're addicted to your TikTok."

"I'm checking my messages and I don't think it's the worst thing in the world when I'm sitting next to Joe Goldberg."

"And I'm sitting next to the drummer from the muppets," You sigh dramatically. Quickly you push yourself up and steal a glance at Kyle's phone screen, surely enough he's on TikTok, sifting through drafts of himself. He pulls his phone towards him and shoots you a glare "I knew it."

"You are so annoying."

"No shame in it man," You raise your hands in defence.

"You would lose your shit if I did that to you."

"I don't even have anything interesting on my phone for you to see," You shake your head "You should see the way kids frown when they ask if I have games on my phone."

"We ready to order?" Sylvia stands next to your booth, a notepad and sparkly pink gel pen in hand.

"Yes ma'am," You hand your menu over "Loaded nachos and a big chocolate milkshake please."

She nods, scribbling it down before looking up at Kyle "And for you?"

"Just the classic cheeseburger with the side salad, please."

"You don't want a Diet Coke or something?" You ask him.

"No, Diet Coke is worse for you than regular soda."

"What? No, it's not."

"Yeah, aspartame is more addictive than sugar."

"in that case, get a milkshake."

"I'm not really a chocolate guy," He dismisses.

"They have other flavours."

"Do you need another minute?" Sylvia chimes in, standing awkwardly between you two.

"No, it's fine," Kyle glances over the drink menu one last time "Uh, a strawberry milkshake, thank you."

"Alright," She gives the two of you a tight-lipped smile "I'll be right back."

"Woah, you actually caved," You smiled at him. "You should've got chocolate though."

He shakes his head, nose wrinking the slightest "It's way too sweet."

"And strawberry isn't?" This might've been the moment you realized that those familiar hateful spats between you and Kyle had boiled down to banter. You had wasted so many years throwing him nasty remarks when you could've been sitting in a diner together.

Kyle looks over at the drink menu "This better be the best damn milkshake I've ever had for eleven dollars." You didn't even try to fight back your laugh, instead dropping your head to rest in your hands on the table while your body shook with laughter "Why are you even laughing?"

"You sound like your dad," You could hardly get the words out with your fit of giggles.

He freezes, eyes going wide and heart dropping. Quickly he leans back in his chair trying to look more relaxed as he gazes out of the window, toward the street.

It took a moment of composure before you finally took a deep breath and sat yourself back up, trying to ease the pain in your ribs from laughing so hard. You look back at Kyle, his eyes narrowed slightly as if he's deep in thought while he looks out at the road. His jaw was clenched as he turned away from you. It was only seconds until you were giggling again.

Kyle looks up, caught off guard. "What?"

"What the fuck are you acting so mysterious for?" You ask, face split in a smile "Staring at a damn dental clinic."

"I'm not acting mysterious, I'm sitting here," He defends himself.

You look out the window in the same direction that he was to see a drunk man stumbling around on the street. He was wearing a Hawaiian shirt and looked like he had been abandoned during a bachelor party. The man staggered, bumping into a lamppost and in doing so falling onto the pavement. He slaps it and shouts something like it was the sidewalk fault he fell over "Real man of mystery, watching a drunk guy fight concrete."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Alrighty," Sylvia places two large glasses down on the table "I've got your milkshakes and your food is coming up."

As the waitress walks away, you see Kyle studying his strawberry milkshake with an exaggerated seriousness. He takes a tentative sip, his expression turning from doubt to surprise, and then he purses his lips, clearly trying to suppress a reaction.

"Regretting your choice of flavour?" you tease, raising an eyebrow.

"Not at all," he says, wiping a stray bit of whipped cream from his lip. It was clear he was now trying to beat the allegation of behaving like his father "Just trying to figure out why anyone would choose chocolate when strawberry is an option."

"Clearly, someone has scrubbed off your tastebuds. Chocolate is the classic choice. Timeless, even." You take a sip, the cold sweetness a perfect contrast to the warm diner and the dry heat outside.

"Timelessly boring," Kyle counters "Strawberry is adventurous. It's for people who know how to live a little."

"Adventurous?" you laugh at the sheer ridiculousness of the statement. "The most adventurous thing about you is that one time you tried siracha mayo on your sandwich."

"And I suffered for that decision."

"Yeah, I remember," you say, chuckling. "You drank about a gallon of milk to cool your mouth down."

"Hey, did you go to the hardware store for your dad yet?" He abruptly changes the subject. Kyle wasn't necessarily in the mood to rehash embarrassing stories.

"Nah, it's not that important," You wave him off "Don't do today what you can do tomorrow."

"That's an awful quote."

"But a quote nonetheless." Unintentionally, your eyes shift to look at Bebe. She could feel eyes on her and turned to meet your gaze, her smile dropping. You look back to Kyle and pretend the last twenty seconds didn't happen.

"Oh my god," He runs a hand down his face. There were some things that came out of your mouth that just left him baffled.

Minutes later Sylvia circles back, gently placing the dishes onto the table. The food may not have been the highest quality but you came mostly for the atmosphere. "Burger with a side salad and loaded nachos. Enjoy, let me know if you need anything."

"Thank you," you both say in unison and look at each other's terrified expressions.

Kyle picks up a forkful of leafy greens, inspecting it before popping it into his mouth. "So, what's the plan after this? You heading home to watch another episode of that trashy reality show you love?"

"Bold of you to call it trashy when you always hang back to watch it and what I do in my free time isn't your business."

"I have never once done that."

"You do it all the time."

"When?" He asks.

"Sorry, did you want me to write down the date, time, and place?" You snark, shoving a nacho into your mouth "Point is, you're a filthy liar and you love them."

"I don't love them, it's hard to ignore it when people spray paint themselves orange and inject so much Botox that they can't cry."

"But you find them entertaining?"

"Someone throwing plates at their friend's head is always gonna be entertaining, doesn't mean it's good," Kyle picks up his burger taking a large bite before chewing thoroughly and setting it back down onto its plate. "Those shows are going to rot your brain."

"Please do not talk about brain rot when you're a TikTok degenerate."

"Degenerate is a pretty big word for you."

"Are you seeing anyone?"

"What you do in your free time isn't my business but you want to know if I'm dating?"

"I meant like a therapist," You say casually.

"Why would I see a therapist?"

"Like, you might be the most annoying person I've ever met but I don't think you should hate yourself."

"I don't."

"Really?" Your tone is so sincere that it takes Kyle aback briefly. This time, it's Bebe whose staring at you, no longer laughing with Cylde, just scowling at you where you pretend you hadn't been creeping earlier.

"Yes."

"I think I would hate myself if I were you."

"Why?"

"Because your name is Kyle and you're a ginger so that's already not the biggest leg up in life."

"Dude, what," He sounds like he's in genuine disbelief.

"Forget it, it's hard watching you brood over your strawberry milkshake" You dismiss him, taking a long sip of your drink "So what did you do since school ended?"

"I've been hanging out with Stan and Kenny, working, went to Tolkien's."

"You cutting out Cartman or something?"

He thinks about it for a minute, letting the past week play out in his head "Yeah, I guess but it's a little hard to get rid of him. Thoughts?"

You nod "And prayers."

"No, not like- never mind," He takes another bite of his tiny side salad "What have you been up to?"

"Just work, really, I almost took Weston for dinner but he cancelled on me to go to his friend's house."

"You should've texted me, we could've done something," He says nonchalantly and you look up from your meal.

"Well, why didn't you text me?"

"Did you want me to?" His eyes dart back and forth beneath furrowed brows, searching for a clue that might make sense of the situation.

"Of course I wanted you to," Your mouth moves faster than your head and the words are quick to fall from your lips.

"Shit, I'm sorry," He says "I just figured you didn't want to talk to me after the raccoon thing, you were kinda weird on the last day of school."

The raccoon thing. You looked down at your hands, a few little cuts where the glass had broken skin "I'm such an asshole," You mutter looking up from your arm to Bebe who was standing up from her booth then to Kyle "I didn't even say thank you when you picked the glass out of my hand."

"It's fine," He's trying to calm you down before something else emerges "I don't care."

"Why did you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Pick the glass from my skin."

"Because you were hurt and you're my friend," He says with ease, trying to get a read on you. Bebe and Cylde brush past you, Bebe actively makes an effort to ignore you while her boyfriend didn't know you were there to begin with.

"We're friends?" You ask, somewhat shocked by the answer. You had always had a hard time putting a label on who was your friend and who wasn't though you had wanted so badly for Kyle to finally say it.

"Yeah, man," He gestures around the table "We're eating dinner together by choice."

You watch as Bebe disappears through the door of the diner and abruptly slide out from the booth. Excusing yourself and rushing to the door to catch her. You didn't want to let another moment slip by, this was an opportunity to set things right and you wouldn't let it fall through the gaps of your fingers.

"Bebe, let's do this," You call after her, stumbling out of the door.

She quirks and eyebrows looking at Cylde before she looks at you "I'm not going to fight you."

"No, I'm not trying to fight, just, oh my god," You rub your temple trying to recompose yourself "Bebe, we got to have it out."

"Did you just quote Little Women?"

"Yes! Because I know you love that movie," As much as you fought against it the desperation was clear in your tone. "And I would watch it a million times just so I could be around you."

Something in her shifts, she crosses her arms, staring you down but makes no indication that she's going to retreat into the car.

"Okay," You nod, trying to put your thoughts into order "And you aren't a slut or a whore or a cunt or a bitch or whatever I said, I don't really remember but I know it was awful and I am just kept awake with the thought of something being the last thing I ever say to you."

Cylde stays silent, eyes flickering back and forth between the two of you, he has one hand hanging on the handle of an already-opened car door. Bebe still stays silent, waiting to hear your next string of apologies. It was difficult enough to humble yourself to do this but the stillness on her end wasn't making it any better.

"I'm not gonna lie, this is hard for me to say but my life without you fucking sucks," You exasperate "I see you in everything I do and I'm bored all of the time. I can't even talk shit with anyone because everyone became a saint all of a sudden and I'm still a dick but I don't really want to-

You're cut off by a man leaving the diner, carrying his takeout boxes. The man awkwardly skims past you, holding his car keys out "Just gotta get to my car," he says in a flat sing-song tone, pressing his lips into a thin line.

Cylde moves out of the way and the man slides into the driver's seat, closing the door with a loud thud. He inserts the key into the ignition, turning it with a hopeful twist. The engine groans in response, a series of sputters and clicks, but it refuses to catch. His brow furrows, and he tries again, turning the key with more insistence this time. The car responds with a grinding sound, followed by an ominous silence. The three of you all look at him, discomfort filling the stagnant air.

"Sorry, you can keep doing your thing, it does this sometimes," He sighs deeply, frustration etched on his face. His fingers drum impatiently on the steering wheel as he looks around, perhaps hoping for a miracle. He pumps the gas pedal a couple of times, as if coaxing the engine back to life, and then turns the key once more. The car protests with a stubborn cough but remains lifeless.

"Um, okay," You close your eyes for a second trying to regain where you were "Bebe, you're my best friend and I don't know what I would do if I never saw you again but I love you so much and I don't wanna be an awful person anymore. I'm so sorry that I'm always doing something shitty but I'm so over it. I just really miss you."

Bebe's stoic face break into a pout and her arms drop at her side as she walks toward you and wraps you in a hug " I really miss you too."

"Let's not fight again, okay?"

"Okay," she confirms "Like never, this was awful."

Leaning back in his seat, the man rubs his temples, trying to think. His eyes dart to the dashboard, checking for any warning lights that might give him a clue. There's a fleeting moment of hope as he fiddles with the battery connections and checks the fuel gauge. "Everything seems to be normal but my car won't start," The man calls out from his window, breaking the tender moment.

You lift your head from Bebe's shoulder, glaring at the man "Okay, fuck off."

"Yeah, seriously, fuck off," Bebe whips her head around and does the same. The air feels lighter all of a sudden, and despite the nervous knot in your stomach, you are happy to call Bebe your friend once again.

[absurdumsid]

killer & ink call that ship name kink

[cookinguptales]

I'm dying, I had another fandom breakup several years ago where I also poured my frustration into a deeply pornographic fic.

The main differences are:

different fandom, obviously

this was actually one of the last fics I ever wrote for that fandom, it really was a kiss off. the only fics I posted after it were just me finishing up some prior obligations.

I actually wrote it and posted it, as opposed to the pornographic vent fic I was writing for wwdits that I set aside for now.

I APPARENTLY POSTED IT TO TUMBLR FIRST?

I know this because someone just reblogged it (and said some really kind things, thank you ;;) and I had completely forgotten that I'd been so deep in my fit of pique that I was like "well this is vent fic that I wrote to cope with my frustration towards canon, not REAL fic, so I should post it to tumblr, not AO3."

At first I was just laughing over the sheer timing of it all, someone digging up this ancient post with like 25 notes from many years ago the exact same week that I'm having angst over the fandom I replaced the old one with, but then I actually clicked on the post in my notifications and was like.

wait.

did I.... post a sixteen-thousand-word fic to tumblr?

I DID. AND PEOPLE READ IT??? like that's the fucking wild part, that people were willing to sit down and read a fucking sixteen-thousand-word fic under a read more on tumblr. people were so strong back then.

(thankfully, I was convinced to crosspost it to AO3 a few days later, which actually made the fucker readable.)

the sheer ridiculousness of my tantrum (and my weird internal classification for what fic "deserved" to be on AO3 vs. what should just quietly be forgotten on tumblr) has me laughing. which I think was actually kind of needed, haha. we all need to laugh at our own fandom angst sometimes.

if I do end up finishing and posting the wwdits ventfic, I promise I'll actually post it on AO3. lmao

[riverdalepolycule]

[ilovefredjones]

the only thing that can save me now is your love

natalie diaz, a brother named gethsemane / tim fedelre, high school musical: the musical: the series / alan watts, what is it like to die / frozen: the broadway musical / x

[ID: black text on a white background. it reads ‘There is no garden. This is my brother and I need a shovel to love him.’

maddox from high school musical: the musical: the series. she is distressed, looking at jet who is off camera. the subtitles read ‘because i’m pretty sure the sibling who is being punished is me.’

black text on a white background. it reads ‘What is childhood like? It's a little like dying, a little like being born. Which is to say, it's nothing you can remember, but you know there was blood.’

jet is talking to ricky, looking slightly uncomfortable. the subtitles read ‘I’ve been a bad guy to her for a long time and it’s eating me up.’

lyrics from the frozen broadway soundtrack. they say ‘Was I a monster from the start? / How did I end up with this frozen heart?’

maddox talking to ricky. in the first frame, she is looking forward, frowning. the subtitles read ‘But we’ve had good days before and...’ . in the second frame, she faces ricky, eyes wide. the subtitles read ‘I just don’t wanna let my guard down and get hurt again, you know?’

lyrics from the frozen broadway soundtrack. they say ‘I can’t be what you expect of me / And I’m not what I seem / But I would love to know you / Is it dangerous to dream?’

maddox clutches a microphone, looking at jet with a soft expression. the subtitles read ‘and I think maybe we’re ready to be happy again.’

black text on a white background. it reads ‘Growing up with a sibling is like being the only people on a stranded boat, constantly figuring out how you can live with them and questioning how you could ever live without them. The only people on a stranded boat. How do you live with them? How could you ever live without them?’. END ID.]