#i live life on the edge

[hesbuckcompton-baby]

writing fics directly into tumblr drafts with zero backups makes me feel alive

[coffees4sleepy]

Gonna drop some nicobaster art and then spit out some jasico and then go back into hibernation

[long-cold-winterr]

Sometimes I like to play a risky game of resting my eyes once I switch off the alarm

[tapiocapo]

I can never remember which dinosaurs are ornithischian and saurischian and what that even means so I basically flip a coin whenever I draw the pelvic region. In other words if you ever see me draw a ornithischian with that big ischium bump please forgive me

[nowhere-again1134]

I always pick when my phones about to die to start masturbating

[mo0nc4lf]

scrolling thru tumblr's for you is like playing russian roulette especially in class

[eyes-onthehorizon]

The Old Guard Provide... Leverage

(otherwise titled Pan Finally Found The Time To Rework ‘February is a Month like Any Other’)

One:

heist [haɪst]

Word forms: plural heists

countable noun [oft noun NOUN]

A heist is a robbery, especially one in which money, jewellery, or art is stolen.

(“Is it really a heist if we’re actually avenging a crime?”

“Psht, technicalities. Heists are about derring-do, and there’s plenty of it to be done.”)

Nicoló was going out of his mind. Not so much as a whiff of a clue had presented itself and the excuses for burrowing around Whitechapel Manor were fraying at the edges. His carriage, which had so artfully broken down in the snow, had finally been repaired and Nicoló had no choice but to depart the following morning.

Andy was desperate to get into the study at any cost; in a last-ditch attempt, he’d decided to write a few letters for his beloved who was waiting to commence their belated honeymoon. All my papers had been ruined in the snow, you see, he’d shrugged self-effacingly at the butler. Might I trouble the study for a few pages?

The same butler stood sentry at the doorway. He wasn’t a distrustful man, quite the opposite: Jennings had been the one to oversee his recovery after he’d taken that nasty fall off Sir Graham’s stallion. He’d become something of a mother hen to Nicoló, and constantly hovered nearby in case a bookshelf or candlestick might decide to commit murder.

It would have been sweet, really, if Nicoló hadn’t been in the midst of intelligence-gathering against one of Britain’s most powerful men. In his own home.

Without looking up from the desk, he spoke: “Jennings, would you be so kind as to fetch me some tea and scones? This is thirsty work.”

He saw Jennings hesitate from the corner of his eye, and kept his expression still. “There is nothing to worry about, old chap. The worst that can happen in here is a paper-cut and I think even I might survive such a calamity.”

“Ha, right you are, Sir. I’ll be back in a moment.” Thank goodness he had a sense of humour.

Nicoló moved as quickly as he could, rifling through drawers and boxes, returning them to their original state with a dexterity Andy had always admired.

(“It’s freaky. You’re a freak.”

“Andy, we don’t die. We are all freaks here.”)

It wasn’t until he could hear Jennings’ footsteps returning down the hallway that he found the hidden compartment in the desk. He made a show of walking around the room, deep in thought, turning only when he was spoken to.

“Your food, Sir.” Jennings said a little breathlessly. Had he rushed? The man was definitely pinker than when he'd left. Nicoló felt a pre-emptive flash of shame at what he was about to do.

“Ah, splendid. Thank you. Do you have any more of the marmalade from breakfast? And is there any chance Cook could rustle up a sandwich with those little tomatoes? I’m positively famished.” Nicoló knew the marmalade had run out because he’d heard the cook grumbling about it when he went down for hot milk the previous evening. It seems he’d eaten through quite the supply during his stay. And cherry tomatoes, at this time of year? It was more unlikely than one would think.

Jennings’ smile had reduced to something resembling a straight line – never a scowl, the man was much too professional for that – the longer Nicoló’s requests went on. Nevertheless, he was bound to do his duty. He bowed, a little, and departed once again.

Nicoló let out a breath he didn’t realise he was holding. This was the worst part of masquerading as a toff: the way he was expected to treat the servants.

He took another turn around the enormous desk to inspect the hidden compartment. It had been jammed hastily shut, with the key hanging conspicuously from a hook on the wall. Nicoló turned it, but the damn thing was stuck.

I’m so close.

He wiggled the drawer.

Jennings is coming.

He tried pushing from below.

What is he hiding?

He took out his pen-knife.

I’m going to get caught.

Tried to leverage it open.

Calm. Stay calm. Stay fucking calm-

He smacked at it in frustration, and this of all things was what finally did the trick. He emptied it, papers and all, into the wastebasket alongside all his crumpled up draft letters. Not wasting a second, he slid the drawer shut, turned the key and returned it to the hook as he kicked the basket over.

Jennings entered the room, bearing a full tray of food and a second pot of tea. The guilt washed over Nicoló again as they both realised he hadn’t touched the first pot that Jennings had gone running for, but the butler’s glance at the messy floor brought him back into the moment.

“Oh my. I’m so clumsy. I do apologise Jennings – would you mind setting up my tea in the blue sitting room?”

“Of course, Sir. I’ll tidy the mess after you’ve tucked in-”

“No need, my fine fellow. Truth be told, I’d rather these letters remain for my beloved’s eyes only. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge and all that, you know? I’ll get this tidied up in a jiffy.”

Torn between the need to do as he was told and allowing a gentleman to do a servant’s work, Jennings hesitated a moment before deciding to just take the easy way out, for once. Nicoló sent up a prayer of gratitude and began piling everything back into the wastebasket.

 ao3

[selfconsumerofmywoes]

been sleeping in a blanket dress because i’m currently living in a building the approximate temperature of an active volcano

[milf-harrington]

idk if the cream cheese was off but ive absolutely slathered my pizza in it so we'll see what happens

[obitoslay]

going to reward myself by reading orv once i finish this assignment. 7pm rn n the deadline is 11pm but its ok bc im half way through

[ojas-awasthi]

I live in a world where hiding my pain and smiling my tears away is considered strength but crying for help is considered asking for sympathy.

I live in a world where social media makes me hate my body and question my existence. I live in a world where the supposed love of my life ditched me for someone else calling me pathetic.

I live in a world where my parents constantly compare me to people my age who are doing way better than me in life without even trying to understand that I am trying to do well in life too.

I live in a world where I try and try hard but my luck seems to wash all my hard work away.

Sometimes it gets rough but I hope I make it till the end. I hope we all do.

[pebblesmustard]

Going to the hairdressers with no idea what I want to do with my hair? It’s more likely than you think.

[anadrenalineslut]

i am actually someone who uses show spoiler tags to keep up with shows I have no interest in ever watching myself and I feel like I'm in the cool kids club every time any show goes viral on here ever but like as a ghost in the background u know

[sunderwight]

Bingqiu AU where Luo Binghe's the chosen village sacrifice to the evil deity who lives up the mountain.

Normally the village sends maidens, but they've more or less run out of expendable girls of the right age and, ahem, "virtues". So of course Luo Binghe's early life bad luck kicks in. In the wake of his mother's death there's no one to really care about what happens to him, he's fairly pretty, and the village leaders decide that if they dress him up like a girl the teenaged homeless kid should pass well enough. And hey, y'know, he's probably got a hard life ahead for him anyway -- dying in a brothel of some venereal disease or on the streets of exposure or starvation. At least as a sacrifice, everyone else gets to benefit from his loss! And the kid will get added to a shrine and be remembered as a hero! If anything, he should be happy about this!

Binghe is not happy about this.

But he's also a skinny underfed nobody who is easily overpowered, dressed up like a bride, and tied to a post. So. Not much he can do but wait for the evil deity to come and do whatever horrible thing he's gonna do to him.

Meanwhile, Shen Yuan is pretty sure he's been isekai'd into the over-powered hero of some kind of supernatural adventure story? He's not totally sure because he doesn't recognize the setting, but the signs are there. He's got a shrine-like base of operations (though it seems to have become corrupted/ruined, probably he has to restore it somehow), he has a very resilient and handsome new body with spiritual energy of some kind flowing through him, and a very clearly magical sword. Plus lots of neat starter powers! Though it feels like he has other abilities that have been blocked somehow? Probably he has to level up in order to access them.

When he treks out of his "base" and finds what seems to be a distressed maiden, he takes it for his beginner hero mission. The girl claims that she's been doomed to be sacrificed to an evil god. That sounds a little above Shen Yuan's pay grade for dealing with, so he unties her and decides that they had better just get out of the whole region altogether. He already packed up anything useful from his base, anticipating he might get caught up in an adventure once he left, so they follow the river away from the settlement until they reach another one.

While they travel, Luo Binghe tells Shen Yuan about the cursed deity, Shen Qingqiu, who was cast out of the heavens for slaughtering one of his brethren and has apparently being do-who-knows what to maidens from the local village in exchange for his "protection" ever since. Sounds like a real asshole! And also mid-level boss type bad guy at least. Shen Yuan hopes he doesn't have to fight him, but he probably will.

Thank goodness he found Binghe, though! Clearly the helpful little sister type! He's definitely going to require her assistance if he's going to figure out how to navigate this world and level up his skills enough to take on a god.

[probablyanalienindisguise]

Blows them up

[an-established-butt-dent]

'Dreamers' A quiet evening

Solas x Lavellan, available as print here.

Mixed media on paper