#i love how my father has just been randomly cutting off any and all financial support he has been giving me which has kept me

[remy]

$50 to last me the next two weeks. I'm doing so good

[blacksunscorpio]

How to Survive Mercury Retrograde in Pisces

Welcome to retrograde season, team. in 2 days, Mercury goes retrograde at 12°53' in Pisces to be exact. Now, retrogrades usually breed a certain amount of panic and understandably so., but this retrograde falls into the sentimental and some could even argue the overly sentimental sign of Pisces. 

So let's break this down, shall we?

Pisces, the fishes (Think Tui and La from Avatar) are ruled by Neptune, the Latin name for Poseidon, god of the sea, dreams, illusions, etc. Mercury rules Virgo and Gemini, hence Mercury does not feel at home in such an emotional and watery sign. Mercury is in its fall. It prefers the critical and airy signs that it’s used to and at 29 degrees (the last decan of the constellation before it moves on to the next) it’s in a hurry to finish things up. In layman’s terms? There’ll be a sense of intense urgency for the next two weeks.

So what else can we expect during this celestial backspin?

Welp, with Mercury Retrograde in Pisces, this creates mental and emotional confusion, with strange erratic dreams and maybe even some psychic experiences. Mercury rules the [rational] mind and thoughts while Neptune ruler of Pisces lords over the unconscious. The subconscious. Addled states of being (so careful with your alcohol intake around this time or overindulging with drugs in general.)

Your mental processes will have a tendency to become merged with emotions and you might find it hard to separate ideas and opinions from your idealism. You feel as if things are unfolding behind-the-scenes but are not yet clear what they are.

So here’s what to look out for in general:

Sleeping patterns (as we mentioned), communication, and travel plans may be thrown off during this time.

People from the past may be reappearing sooner than expected and bringing with them Emmy winning displays of emotion and drama thanks to the Piscean influence. Don’t trip off this one too much, sometimes this means you could receive that ever-elusive closure you never got.

With upcoming Mercury retrograding in Aries (ruled by Mars, god of war), periods of combative attitudes are heightened as well as impulsive decision-making.

I cannot stress this enough: THINK before you speak.

Deceptive people will swarm like roaches ESPECIALLY with Neptune in Pisces. People show you their true colors so you know who needs to be removed from your life.

Arguments are more prone at this time..

Pretty cut and dry, right? If not, here’s what each of the signs should be aware of specifically during this watery transit.

Aries – Hello my fiery brothers and sisters. Take this time to relax, think things through and watch your tongue. I know it’s hard with our ruling planet being Mars and all but you would not want anything you say now to follow you through the remainder of your birthday season. Mercury retrograde is aiding you in redefining your emotional boundaries and making concise decisions on what to take into the next year of your life—just in time, too, because Aries SZN starts on the 20th, just a week before the retrograde ends. But do take a break from people who have been exhausting you, you don’t have to apologize for taking care of you. Chill.

Taurus – You might suffer from miscommunicating with friends and family members or just everyone in your radius. Or maybe it's just that no one gets how awesome your thoughts are. Either way, be as clear as possible with those around you so that you don’t get annoyed with the world. Mercury retrograde is testing your emotional capacity to open up. Testing your ability to refrain from being judgmental. Try being a little more accepting.

Gemini – You might be frustrated since no one seems to get your ideas but this will prove to be a fruitful period of time for you. Mercury in daydreamy Pisces fills your head with ideas of what could be and where you want to go in life, but you struggle to fit these dreams into reality. The good thing is, you’re trying. And A-for-effort, you little genius. Accept your status as the wise one amongst friends, school or even work. Mercury gives you some much-needed insight while everyone seems to be out-of-whack.

Cancer – Yeah, this bad boy’s gonna hit you guys pretty hard. There’s no sense in cloaking it. You, my clawed cousins, are probably the most emotional sign so not only are your feelings heightened, you may feel like you just want to get away from it all. Considering taking a nice trip? Stahp. Plan it now and go for it in the next few months. While Mercury is in Retrograde, you definitely do not want to take some crazy excursions. If you need to take a break, visit a museum, take up some yoga or work on that project you gave up on a while ago. These alternatives will help you cope in a healthy way instead of running from what you don’t want to face.

Leo – Tax season is coming up, so contemplate how you want those funds allocated. Yes, my preening feline. With Chiron (planet of wounds and healing) and Mercury in such close proximity, you might feel a bit wounded this time around. Self-help books could become useful this time as you try to decipher dreams or just memories from the past. Pay attention to things you normally wouldn’t. That includes friends and family you’ve been neglecting. This Piscean influence is sending you signals and forcing you to readjust the way you exchange emotional resources as well as your financial ones. The devil’s in them details.

Virgo – Oh Virgo’s my OCD loves: Try to loosen up this month. Not everything has to be perfect and you don’t need to go ghost in order to obtain it. With this Piscean influence affecting your relationships, people might be put off by your disappearing act and might consider whether you value their friendships. Reach out, be that person that randomly appears during retrograde. Heal those old wounds and reassure the ones you love with your presence. Chances are if someone’s crossing your mind it’s because you’re on theirs as well.

Libra – Mercury will add some irritation to your routines but you’re good at this, so it will not be such a big deal. Here you learn how to perfect things and redo them so that you will get the value months from now. You’ll do things you’ll thank yourself for later. Work hard even if you don’t feel motivated that way you can play hard later.

Scorpio – Good news arachnid fam, this is the time to relax and break free. I don’t think any of us can forget (or forgive) the things that happened during the last Retrograde. But now that we’ve healed, expect a lot of muses to inspire you. Your artistry is alive. Your creative juices are flowing and people flock to you this March. Social connections are highly likely as you make time to reconnect and steal the spotlight. Yes you’ll be affected by the watery influence but you’re ruled by water too so it’s nothing you can’t flex on.

Sagittarius – Miscommunications at home (which might be part of this issue since you guys are a ruled by the planet of expansion) can prove frustrating but no worries! This is temporary. This will help clear out the air and it will allow you to work on any family drama you have been ignoring. Relax, take notes. You guys are a sign that’s notorious for your blatant and cavalier honesty. Some appreciate it. Some just think you’re harsh. Listen to others and take a page from Libra’s book on this and practice being more diplomatic in your approach.

Capricorn – It’s highly unlikely that you will be on time for anything this month which is highly unlike you since you guys are ruled by Saturn, father of time. Sorry fam, the world seems to be against you, or maybe it’s just time being complicated. You as an earth sign just don’t rock with this watery retrograde. It may seem hard but attempt to go with the flow, don’t lose your cool. Mercury here will teach you some much-needed patience. Be clear, be concise and be patient.

Aquarius –Shmonnaayyyyy! Listen, this could prove to be a beneficial time for you as you see a surge of income from unexpected forces. Has your right had been itching? While others might be losing their mind, you might actually benefit from this period since mercury is making you remove the emotional baggage and clutter as you get your finances in order and learn from previous spending habits and mistakes.

Pisces – It’s about you, baby. Happy birthday. You are on Cloud 9. Yes, this year may have started with upsets and disappointments, but you’ve noticed that things have stabilized and you feel extra Zen with the universe. Mercury’s taught you acceptance, self-care and most importantly self-love (who couldn’t use more of that?) This unconditional joy you may experience throughout the month will allow you to bloom and heal for Aries Season.

So what have we learned today?

Number one: don’t resort to excesses but remain balanced and focused on building the right sort of relationships. Be it work relationships, old ties we thought were forgotten or family binds that will never break. Yes yes, nervousness and stress, fears paranoia may be stimulated, especially if you’ve been working or living in an environment hostile to your deeper needs. But let's all remember to keep our dignity and wits about us. Especially with such a murky and hazy fog that Neptune always blesses us with (note sarcasm) around this time.

Now, will second-guessing and trying to read between every line be hard to avoid? Absolutely. However, the best course of action around this time is to make as few assumptions as possible. Be open to your own intuitive hunches and be ready to take a new direction when it suddenly materializes. It may be closer than you think.  And when the mist clears, you’ll have the opportunity to really make yourself seen and heard. Until then, I’ll be here to keep you updated on the latest celestial happenings. Good luck.

[deepestdarkestsickestpartsofu]

Introduction

We met in spring of 2017. He changed my life forever, in a way that I will never be able to explain. What I would want you to understand before reading this, is how much love has taken charge of my feelings and impulses. 

I loved him, I love him. 

Nothing he did will ever change that.

At this point I bet you may be wondering who I am. Right... I guess I should introduce myself. My name is Nadir, a 25 year old man that is attracted to other men, but that’s not the most significant part in the story. I grew up in a quiet conservative town in Michigan, with a small population of less than 5,000 people. My mother is pretty old schooled and forced me to stay in school until I graduated. That meant no ‘girlfriends’, no sleepovers, no working. I always had the desire to help her monetarily by getting a job and at least pay the house bills. However she would constantly say to me to just focus on my studies and that would be what would help us in the long run.

My parents are originally from Israel. My mother grew up as Catholic, which was not the usual back then and my father grew up Jewish. They became less religious when they decided to move to the United States, which is where they had my siblings and I. They both lived here as immigrants and I didn’t understand what that meant when I was a child, I just thought we were like any other family living in the US. My father unfortunately passed away from a heart attack when I was 8 years old and it affected me in ways you couldn’t possibly imagine. During his wake, I didn’t cry. It was all so surreal and I felt like he would wake up randomly and claim that everything was a joke. He had a great sense of humor and always managed to make people smile, however his death wasn’t a joke. Once it was time to bury him, I cried as hard as I could since I knew I wouldn’t see him ever again. After that, my mother worked as hard as she could to give my siblings and I what we needed. She could barely afford to pay for the mortgage on the house until my older brothers started working and helping her out with as much as they could. My mother worked two jobs daily to make sure we had food on our table, clothes and a good education. 

It would hurt me to see her stress about providing for us, so eventually I managed to get a scholarship at San Francisco State University. Being the youngest of 4 children gave me a bit of an advantage to enjoy ‘the beauty of freedom’ as we know it now, and not have to struggle about being gay in the 70′s, not that it’s any different now. I mean there are hate crimes all over, shootings that keep getting more common by the minute and discrimination which is still pretty big now. That is one of the reasons why I decided not to come out to my mother, nor anyone in town for that matter. I was already struggling with self-acceptance and I didn’t want to be a burden to my mother. During my senior year of High School I managed to convince my mother to let me work to save up for essential stuff. I began working at a pharmacy and little by little saved up enough money to leave town and follow my dreams in a career I wanted. I wasn’t certain of what my major would be, however it needed to be in the art field. Whether it would be acting, directing, drawing or video editing. I decided to go with the flow and see what would appeal my interest. I wanted to be able to afford a place in ‘The City’, so working at that little pharmacy helped me save up & I also had a job secured so I would be able to help my mother with her expenses from afar. 

It took me a few months but right before spring classes started, I booked the first plane to San Francisco without looking back. My siblings showed up with my mother to the airport. Elijah, the oldest, was a bit of a role model growing up. He got married at 22, had 2 children and joined the police force. Amir, the second to oldest, was always a jokester which he definitely got from my father,  and had a bit of a ‘bad boy’ complex, which is quite the opposite of Elijah. He never got married, which my mother never agreed with, however he did have 3 kids, all with different women. Last but not least, my sister Hadassah, she was only 3 years older than me and I guess you could say we were the closest. Both of us would take care of my mom as much as possible and help her around the house as much as it was possible. She decided to stay in a community college to be closer to my mother and to help her financially as much as she possibly could. I hugged everyone goodbye, but when I got to my mother I couldn’t hold it in much longer. Tears started pouring down my face as I hugged her, but managed to remind her that this wasn’t a goodbye, but a ‘see you later’. I wish I could’ve come out to her, but I was afraid it would devastate her and we might lose the relationship we had built. As cliche as it sounds, she is my best friend, the person I trust the most in this world. I was considering staying as I hugged her. She pulled away and put our foreheads together. 

“You’ll be fine... You’ve got this! And remember einayim sheli, you’re stronger than you think! I’ll be supporting you from afar! Nothing you could do would ever disappoint me”.

“I love you mom. Don’t worry, I’ll send money your way and I’ll be back during the holidays!”

“You better, my dear! Now go, don’t want you to miss your flight”, she said as she hugged me once again.

Her words gave me enough courage to pick up my stuff and board the plane. I turned back once more before heading to the ramp and saw my siblings & her waving at me. Hadassah was hugging my mother and even though she was trying to stay as strong as possible, I saw tears rolling down her face. She noticed that I saw them and immediately wiped them off with a smile. I always admired how strong of a woman she is. She truly is a role model and someone I look up to as to how to live my life. However, I’ve never been as strong so I couldn’t hold back and started crying as I boarded the plane. 

The flight felt eternal and having anxiety didn’t help at all. I quit medication a few months before leaving since I didn’t think I would need it… Boy, was I wrong. I managed to calm myself down by working on some sketches I’ve been doing on my drawing paper pad. Next thing I knew, I was arriving in San Francisco, California; Population: 883,305, well... I guess now it’s 883,306 residents. I wasn’t necessarily going into San Francisco completely helpless, I was moving in with my best friend. I met Marcia in elementary school. Her father Sebastiao works for the government, and that’s as much as I know about him. That and the fact that he had to move to San Francisco due to a “really good job opportunity”.  Her father is originally from Brazil & his wife, Mayra is Mexican-American. Marcia grew up and learned all three languages, English, Spanish & Portuguese so she was able to fit in easier in “The Bay Area” when they left our little town. We would spend hours on the phone after she moved and she would tell me about San Francisco and how she thought I’d love it. She was honestly afraid to be one of those kids whose parents have to move regularly because of their jobs, but lucky for her, she didn’t have to do that. She set up a high bar for me arriving in San Fran and when I did... Well, let’s just say she didn’t disappoint. Her dad bought her an apartment and she was willing to share it with me at no cost, but I already had plans of helping her out with utilities & give her some extra cash to thank her for sharing her apartment with me. She shared her apartment with two puppies, Chuy & Elena, two small pomeranians whom she considered her children since she wasn’t planning on having any kids. When I told her I had gotten a scholarship to SF State, she immediately suggested I should move in with her. I wasn’t too sure of that idea, but it honestly was the best option I had so far.

I finally get my luggage and sit in the lobby to wait for her. I look around and see a lot of people meeting up with their loved one, whether it is their lover, or family. “You just left your family back there. You won’t even make it here nor achieve anything you had your mind set to. This is truly a bad idea. Why are you even doing here? You’re an idiot for leaving! All for some stupid experiment you want to try? Bullshit!”. I close my eyes and take another deep breath. I then feel my phone vibrate with the following text message:

“I see you!”

I looked up and saw her smile. She hadn’t grown much, stood about 5′6, black, curly shoulder-length hair, light skinned, with dorky glasses. People always claimed she was a weirdo, but who am I to judge? I was a bit taller than her, stood about 6′1, a bit of scruff on my face, brown semi clean-cut hair. I was always the weird kid at school, so we managed to click from the very beginning. She was the first person to talk to me in elementary school, and that meant the world to me. I was always a bit of an introvert, however she helped me come out of my shell little by little and when she left, I fell back into it. 

“Marcia! Babe! I’m so happy to see you!”

I ran to her and hugged her. It felt like yesterday that I had said goodbye to her at the airport. 

“Honeeeeey! Ugh, I’m soooo glad to see you! You smell soooo good! Don’t tell me you’re still into buying or should I say, collecting colognes?”

“Guilty!”

“Well then, you just might like what I have for you at home! Let me help you with your bags! I can’t wait for you to FINALLY meet Chuy & Elena! They’re going to LOVE you! My tia is still pretty mad that I named Elena after her, but she should take it as a compliment! It just means I love her! I mean, dogs are your most loyal companions... Not that she was ever loyal to my uncle, but still! I’m telling you, my little Elena is NOTHING like her!” 

I looked at her in disbelief. She still had that smile and a gleam in her eye. She had always had that hopeful gleam in her eye... Something I had lost a long time ago. 

I hated it.

“I’ll kill if I have to, but I’ll regain that hope again, just wait”

[simonxriley]

The ultimate relationship tag for skylar/Tachanka I must know more please. Not sure which ones so you can choose. Its hard to pick which ones again.

You shall know more…a lot more at that!!! And since it’s gonna be very long and I might go on a tangent here and there it’ll be under the cut.

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice?

Probably Alex.

Who threatens to leave but never actually does?

Neither, they work out their shit like responsible mature adults.

Who actually keeps their word and leaves?

Again neither.

Who trashes the house?

No one.

Do either of them get physical?

Hell no. They might raise their voices at each other every now and then, but they would never physically hurt each other.

How often do they argue/disagree?

Very limited.

Who is the first to apologize?

Whoever was the one to start the argument.

Sex:

Who is on top?

Alex.

Who is on the bottom?

Skylar.

Who has the strangest desires?

Probably Skylar, but I can see Alex having some too.

Any kinks?

A few. Blindfolds, handcuffs, dirty talk and ice play.

Who’s dominant in bed?

Alex and Sky loves every bit of it.

Is head ever in the equation?

Always. There’s nothing they like better than going down on each other.

If so, who is better at performing it?

Skylar would say Alex and Alex would say Skylar so…both I guess.

Ever had sex in public?

Yes, a few times actually. And all of them were in Russia. But one time they had sex while the Spetznas and FBI were training together. 

Who moans the most?

Skylar.

Who leaves the most marks?

Alex, poor Sky is usually cover in hickeys or small bruises.

Who screams the loudest?

Skylar.

Who is the more experienced of the two?

Alex.

Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’?

Make love, Alex thinks it sounds more romantic.

Rough or soft?

Both!

How long do they usually last?

Alex can last a very long time, unfortunately Skylar cannot. She needs at least a 20 minute break before they start again. 

Is protection used?

Yes. Sky is on birth control, and Alex always has a box of condoms.

Does it ever get boring?

Never. They spice it up every few weeks.

Where is the strangest place they’d have sex?

I can’t really think of any place.

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children?

Kids were never really in the equation for them until after they married and Skylar thought about the future one day at a park. 

If so, how many children do your muses want/have?

They both wanted 4 but due to unforeseen fertility issues they only ended up having 2. Their fraternal twins have been nothing more than a blessing to them. A boy names Konstantin Alexsandr  and a girl named Marianna Skylar 

Who is the favorite parent?

Probably Skylar, but that doesn’t mean the twins don’t love their father any less.

Who is the authoritative parent?

Alex!

Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school?

Skylar, and what’s one day off gonna hurt?

Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around?

They both let them indulge every once in a while. Besides it’s no fun eating healthy all the time anyways.

Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children?

They both do if they can. If one of them is working facetime is always the answer.

Who goes to parent teacher interviews?

Skylar, she’s too afraid Alex will say something and get the kids expelled or something.

Who changes the diapers?

Who’s ever the closest.

Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby?

They both do unless the other is away working.

Who spends the most time with the children?

Skylar, cause she postponed going back to work until the kids were a little over a year old.

Who packs their lunch boxes?

Both. 

Who gives their children ‘the talk’?

They both do.

Who cleans up after the kids?

Both unless they are old enough to do it themselves.

Who worries the most?

Alex, surprisingly.

Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from?

Uncle Glaz. And it was blyat, which means fuck in Russian. 

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle?

Skylar, she’s very affectionate and Alex doesn’t mind one bit.

Who is the little spoon?

Skylar, Alex feels better with his arms wrapped around her. Protecting her in a way.

Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?

ALEX. If they have a mission together he’s teasing her during the briefing and maybe even during the ride there.

Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?  

Alex, but once their relationship went public Skylar had trouble too.

How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?

A very long time. Alex doesn’t care if his body goes numb, as long as she’s by his side he’s happy.

Who gives the most kisses?

Probably Skylar.

What is their favorite non-sexual activity?

When they’re cleaning their guns together and just talking about anything and everything.

Where is their favorite place to cuddle?

Skylar would say couch and Alex would say bed.

Who is more likely to playfully grope the other?

Both would.

How often do they get time to themselves?

Very often, considering if one of them is on a mission somewhere.

Sleeping:

Who snores?

No one.

If both do, who snores the loudest?

No one.

Do they share a bed or sleep separately?

They share one.

If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?

They start off cozy up’d together but once they’re asleep they kinda drift apart.

Who talks in their sleep?

Alex, and it’s usually in Russian. Occasionally Sky will talk in her sleep too.

What do they wear to bed?

Alex is either in just a pair of sweats or his boxers. Sky wears a pair of shorts and a slightly over-sized shirt.

Are either of your muses insomniacs?

They kinda both are, but more so with Sky.

Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside?

Yes, for Sky. The outbreak really did a number on her.

Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side?

Sometimes both.

Who wakes up with bed hair?

Skylar since she has longer hair than Alex.

Who wakes up first?

Alex.

Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other?

Alex. He LOVES to cook for her.

What is their favourite sleeping position?

Alex doesn’t have one and Sky likes to sleep on her side.

Who hogs the sheets?

Sky.

Do they set an alarm each night?

No, unless they have a mission really early in morning.

Can a television be found in their bedroom?

Nope. They don’t usually spend a lot of time in their room. Only for sleeping and uh baby making.

Who has nightmares?

Sky.

Who has ridiculous dreams?

Surprisingly, Alex.  

Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?

ALEX.

Who makes the bed?

They both do. Do you think Sky’s gonna really make a king sized bed??

What time is bed time?

Whenever. It really depends on what they have going on.

Any routines/rituals before bed?

Just the normal brush your teeth, wash your face.

Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up?

No one….well maybe Sky if she hasn’t had a good nights rest.

Work:

Who is the busiest?

Alex.

Who rakes in the highest income?

Alex, only ‘cause he’s older.

Are any of your muses unemployed?

Nope.

Who takes the most sick days?

Sky.

Who is more likely to turn up late to work?

Neither.

Who sucks up to their boss?

Neither.

What are their jobs?

They’re operators for team Rainbow. Or Skylar’s FBI and Alex is Spetsnaz. 

Who stresses the most?

Skylar, especially after the twins were born. 

Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?

They both enjoy their jobs, if they didn’t i don’t think they would be working there. 

Are your muses financially stable?

Yes they are. 

Home:

Who does the washing?

Skylar. 

Who takes out the trash?

Alex. 

Who does the ironing?

No one…who irons anymore??? No one! 

Who does the cooking?

Both, but mostly Alex. 

Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying?

Probably Skylar. 

Who is messier?

Skylar. 

Who leaves the toilet roll empty?

Alex and Skylar HATES it. 

Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?

Skylar. 

Who forgets to flush the toilet?

Neither (thank god)

Who is the prankster around the house?

Alex. 

Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?

Skylar. 

Who mows the lawn?

Alex. 

Who answers the telephone?

Both. 

Who does the vacuuming?

Whoever is home when it needs to be done. 

Who does the groceries?

They both do. 

Who takes the longest to shower?

Skylar. 

Who spends the most time in the bathroom?

Skylar. 

Misc:

Is money a problem?

Nope. 

How many cars do they own?

They own 2. 

Do they own their home or do they rent?

They own. One house is in Bangor and the other is in St Petersburg. 

Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside?

In the middle. 

Do they live in the city or in the country?

City. 

Do they enjoy their surroundings?

Yes they do. 

What’s their song?

Go Ahead And Break My Heart by Blake Shelton ft Gwen Stefani and Misery by Gwen Stefani. 

What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Before the twins Skylar would spend her time either training or with Ash and after the twins she would take care of them if Alex was gone. As for Alex he would spend most of his time in his room looking through his phone or training with the rest of the Spetsnaz. But if he has the twins he obviously in father mode. 

Where did they first meet?

At Rainbow’s base in Hereford. 

How did they first meet?

Montagne introduced them. 

Who spends the most money when out shopping?

Skylar. 

Who’s more likely to flash their assets?

Neither. 

Who finds it amusing when the other trips over?

Skylar…..like who wouldn’t be amused to see a big guy like Tachanka trip? 

Any mental issues?

Yes…but I can’t say yet what it is. 

Who’s terrified of bugs?

Skylar. 

Who kills the spiders around the house?

Alex. 

Their favourite place?

Either of their homes. 

Who pays the bills?

They both do. 

Do they have any fears for their future?

Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?

Alex. 

Who uses up all of the hot water?

Skylar. 

Who’s the tallest?

Alex by 8 inches. 

Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?

They both are honestly. But Alex will ask Skylar if it’s alright since she’s a girl and has a lot more to do in the shower than he does. 

Who wanders around in their underwear?

Skylar. 

Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?

Skylar. 

What do they tease each other about?

Alex teases her about how short and cute she is. And Sky will tease him that he’s always on his phone. 

Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?

Neither, they’re both pretty casual. 

Do they have mutual friends?

Yes they do. 

Who crushed first?

ALEX. He feel hard and fast. 

Any alcohol or substance related problems?

Nope. 

Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?

Alex. 

Who swears the most?

Alex, but in Russian. 

[percontaion-points]

Let’s Play “Moments: Hold Me, Leave Me” Part 5

Anyway, the owner of the resort-half is Jayden's and Grayson's father. Angela is obviously shocked at this, although Jayden insists (at least in front of daddy dearest), that the two of them have never met before. Either they really haven't, Jayden doesn't remember about having met Angela before, or he's lying. Angela pretends to be cool about this entire thing.

Dad wanders off to go talk to somebody else, which leaves Jayden to introduce Angela to somebody else. He acts completely smug about the entire thing, and Angela thinks that he's going to be a problem.

For some reason, it's the step-mom from Challenge Accepted? Except that least her weird leather dress makes way more sense in the context of Hold Me, Leave Me. A SAHM does not need to wear that dress.  

Anyway, Caroline doesn't seem to like Angela very much... for some reason. My guess is that she's Jayden's girlfriend, and she knows that Jayden is about to become a datable. (And because I fucking hate Grayson and would like to chuck him directly into the sun, I think my only other option now is Jayden... Le sigh) Caroline introduces Angela to some more people, before she tells Angela that “the dress you're wearing isn't very classy.” At least I don't look like I'd offer $5 blow-jobs behind a Burger King... Angela insists that how she dresses doesn't affect her work, and she pointedly stares at Caroline's exposed cleavage. Caroline insists that how you dress is a way of presenting yourself. SAYS THE LADY IN A FUCKING LEATHER MINI-DRESS! Angela then suggests that they should go shopping right now, since this is clearly more important than anything. Caroline quickly excuses herself. Uh-huh.

William comes to say goodbye. After he leaves, Jayden comes over and lays down the rules. He doesn't want for Angela to mix with his side of the business, and insists that she remain at the “hotel” part. Angela is curt to him, but her words drip with venom and sarcasm. He leaves, and Caroline asks her why he was so upset. She also seems to know an awful lot about Jayden, so points towards my girlfriend theory.

Angela is shown her office, and after a while, taken to meet her boss.

AND IS EVERY FREAKING CHARACTER HERE FROM CHALLENGE ACCEPTED? This is the mom from that game!

Diana is quick to tell Angela that nobody forced her to take Angela on as an intern, despite her father. She then explains that these floors are the lower-paying rooms, these are the higher paying ones, and then these are the VIP rooms, plus the rooftop area. She sets Angela to come up with some room designs, and to go look at some of the other rooms.

Angela goes upstairs, where she picks a room at random to look at. However, she's like “Hm, looks like somebody's staying here, even though the hotel's not open yet?” She tries to leave, but for some reason, the door won't open. And guess whose room it is? (Go on, guess.)

She finds Jayden's journal, and starts to panic a little, but if she's trapped in the room, there's not much she can do right now. She decides to open it and start reading it (because when you're trapped in the hotel room of a guy who clearly can't stand you, the first thing I think is to read his private journal.) And then we have a title drop, because of course.

Jayden comes in, and Angela hides behind the curtains. He's talking on the phone, to Grayson, talking about their father. Apparently, daddy's cut Grayson off. He kind of deserves it. However, either Jayden is stupid or he just loves his brother enough, he's given Grayson some money via a joint bank account.

Jayden ends the all, and then starts to change. AND OH JEEZ, WHY. (Also, if I was Angela, I would have played up the entire 'just studying the rooms' thing, so that it wouldn't be weird. She's going to get caught in 3... 2...) He then notices her hiding behind the curtain the mirror and screams at her to get out. Which... wouldn't you? Damn, she's stupid and being kind of creepy. She screams at him about what happened... but offers nothing about why she was fucking hiding behind the curtain like a creeper.

She storms from the room, but he stops her. He apologizes, and rightly says that he doesn't like people invading his privacy. SHE WAS HIDING BEHIND THE CURTAINS... She tells him that he has a fever, which 1) Caroline told her this earlier and 2) she can feel how hot he is even with him holding onto her wrist. She insists that he should take some medicine, and that nothing could be more important than his health. He asks why she cares so much, but she insists that she doesn't.

She goes back down to her office, when Ashton calls. She tells him that she's having a hard time at work. Although it's been like ten fucking minutes, JFC. Grow a backbone. He just wanted to check in on her, and quickly hangs up.

Caroline comes barging in and starts barking out orders... which seems highly suspicious. Like I get that Angela's an intern, but dear lord, she's not fucking stupid. However, it's probably best not to continue to piss her off, so Angela agrees to do the work. But the second that she turns it in to Caroline, she chucks it into the trash and says that Diana doesn't need it anymore. Uh-huh.

At lunch, somebody comes in to give Angela a sandwich, which she didn't order, but it's her favorite. She questions one of the other ladies, who was said to have placed the order, but she says that Jayden said to order it for Angela.

At the end of the day, Angela leaves the building to call for a cab (and what's wrong with the office phones?), when she literally runs into Jayden. She says that nobody told her when her hours were supposed to be, and he offers her a ride home. BUT THAT'S VIP. However, despite Angela insisting that she'll call a cab, which could take hours to get there. He's worried about her being mostly alone at the resort, so he calls his driver and asks him to take Angela where ever she asks right now. Angela argues about this, but Jayden gets angry that she's so argumentative. She takes his car back home, and the entire time, she can't stop thinking about Jayden.

After a shower and change of clothes, Angela gets a text from Grayson. She tells him about working with Jayden, but Grayson insists that his brother isn't that bad. Grayson says he has a nice apartment. In LA. Even though he's been cut off financially. Uh-huh. He sucking dick out there or something? He also says that the female lead is pretty, and that he misses Angela.

The next morning, Angela thinks about what Caroline said, so she tries to find something “approrpiate” to wear to work. However, upon not finding anything in her own closet, she decides to raid Amelia's closet. Since it's before noon, Amelia's still asleep. She looks through Amelia's closet, and finds a dress, but eventually decides that she shouldn't have to change who she is just to please some asshole lady who's not even really your boss. Downstairs, William asks Angela to join him for breakfast, but she insists that she doesn't want to be late and leaves. In her own car.

When Angela gets in, Caroline and Diana stare at her, and Jayden doesn't show any outward signs, but Angela can tell by the look in his eyes that he's aroused by her. She never really wanted to catch his attention, but seeing Caroline being so jealous is a perk, she decides. She and Diana go into Angela's office to talk design.

Later, Angela bumps into Caroline who's like “your sister is a slut.” Lol, yes she is. Your point? She also implies that, since Angela is “dressed nice”, Angela must also be a slut. (By that standard, you're probably just as much of a slut as Amelia is.) Angela ignores her. Caroline accuses Angela of trying to land herself Jayden, but Angela's just like “I got this job because of my dad and my talents. I don't care about Jayden.”

Caroline storms off, and Angela realizes that Jayden was behind her... pretty much the entire time. She then randomly projectile vomits onto Jayden's shoes. She vomits again, this time over herself, and then passes out. And here we go...

[cremedelaart]

I haven’t physically felt pure, raw Loveee like this since the time I took Shrooms. Before I even found out about you, you hit me like a wave. Never had I randomly got dizzy like that, I blamed it on the pasta I had for lunch. I prayed I wasn’t catching food poisoning. In all actuality another prayer was being answered. A prayer that I intended to have manifested in like 3-7 years. Not at 25. Speaking of which, I used to say ( age 16 and under) by 25 I’d want to be married and with a kid. Maybe cuz subconsciously I knew your Grandma had me at 24 & at the time was married to your Grandad. Anyhow, as I got older & I got a taste of the real world & discovered my passion I was like “Nahhh, I want to master my mind, body, soul & my passion before I bring life into this dimension”…Especially an energy, a Being as profoundly evolved & paradigm shifting as you.

Well….you had other plans for me obviously.

Between knowing there’s timing with everything & not believing in coincidences & the fact that there’s definitely been times where I could’ve/should’ve been pregnant & nothing happened. I had gotten to the point that I thought I just couldn’t have kids, like something was wrong with my ovaries. I would never say it out loud even if I was completely alone, never told a soul that b/c I didn’t want to speak it into existence. (Besides you couldn’t tell men that, they’d be tryns shoot the club up at every chance.) So it makes my mind melt when I try to figure out why you chose now & the man you chose as your father, not that you didn’t make a good choice. Can’t help but think of that saying I heard years ago when they said “Children pick their parents.”

You were basically waving a big ass sign in my face saying, “MA……I’M HEREEEE!!” when my period came on for a day (that lil mf said “Hi & bye”) & my breast were still sore..even now. Took a test at work & felt my body go tingly all over as I saw the plus sign appear.

Astrologically, you were concieved under a Cancer new moon. (Apparently Water sign new moons are the best fertile times. Found this out, wayyy after the fact doing some research cuz I wanted to know if we created you under a New or Full moon.) Discovered you were inside me on Friday (the day associated w/ Taurus (Me), love, & fertility). You’d been vibrating inside of me for 3 weeks…3 is one of my favorite numbers. Your Dad is an Aries & you’ll be one too if you don’t pull any more unexpected stunts. There are 2 back to back New Moons in Leo (we’re under the 1st one, the next is in August) and this is the year we have 2 solor eclipses next month. Gucci mane is getting married 10/17/17 & Beyonce had twins last month, now making her a mother of 3. On a dot connecting level, you were aligned & destined to come into this world when you were ready. Lol I see now how you move, P.

First song I played for you was Lauryn Hill’s “To Zion.” And ofcourse Al Green’s “Simply Beautiful. We gotta get some head phones for my second trimester so you can CLEARLY hear the music. I’m sure you barely heard a thing at 3 weeks in the womb.. but I heard it so I know you felt the energy of the notes playing through my veins lol.

To me, you are divine immaculate conception. I have loved you since I first found out about you. You instantly changed my eating habits, my thought patterns, my views, even got back heavily into yoga & cut off anything & anyone that did not come from a genuine place mentally, physically, energetically, or spiritually. I absolutely did/do not care who you were/are. Any hint of bad vibes, Im keeping them 1000 feet or greater away from me.

It’s funny that before I knew of you I felt myself drifting into a cacoon where I wanted to go within myself & do some self-healing & self improvement. Like I could feel it on a spiritual level that I was, by choice, preparing to evolve into the next level of woman I’m destined to be. Lol from the looks of it you turned that sand of an idea into concrete. Now I damn sure am about to fall so deep within myself, I just very well may drown & come back reborn…emerging from the waters a whole new Being.

I’m glad I lived my life to the fullest, wild as fuck and all. Lmao anyone who knew me before age 25 can vouch I was a mf'er with myself ( & thats an understatement😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂💀💀💀💀💀💀💀☻☻☻��) So I don’t feel like you cut my younger years short & because I happened to be so aligned with the Most High lol, you fit right in with me painting. I just know I gotta buy your own paint set so you don’t mess up my stuff. I went from Creme De La Art to Creme De La Art & Co. If anything, you’re enhancing the F out of my life. And I look forward to all of our adventures, I already know you’re going to be funnier than me. Every move I make I’m putting my all into it so you have a sensational example of a woman, a mother & a role model.

Between my art & you, I am for sure leaving my mark & I know my bloodline will further itself another generation & this time taking our bloodline to places our Ancestors prayed for.

As private of a life as I live, I had to announce you to the world, this time & this time only. The next time anyone outside of my circle sees you, they’ll for damn sure be looking into the eyes of one of the most powerful, profound, balanced, creative, influential, mentally, financially, physically, spiritually, energetically healthy & wealthy Beings this dimension has ever met.

The seeds I plant in your mind will see it so.

Between your parents, family, friends, co-workers, even Ex lovers, it’s been nothing but love for you, you cool ass kid to be.

I should be scared but I’m not. I should be nervous but Im not. There may be hard times but last i checked sandpaper only helped a 💎Diamond💎 shine brighter. I know the Most High has us & I thank you for choosing me( though you were beyond unexpected & unplanned) & thanks for choosing your Dad 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾b/c the guy I had in mind turned out to not be shit with his self or life 😂😂😂😂

We’ll be waiting for you at the Do’, P. See you soon, Love. 😚

[daddyconfessions]

sugar tales: baby ripped me off

I’ve gotten a lot of anon questions so I haven’t been able to blog on my past experiences as much as I would like. But, now that I’m catching up I can get back to sharing how things are for us Daddy’s out here.

I met Ripoff on SA around late April. She was the first seemingly decent SB after a long dry spell for me. I’d met Nebraska on the rebound from Bottlecap. Nebraska and I started in December ’14 and we lasted about several weeks. But I fucked up with her and she ended up getting another SD before I could fix things. Even though I started the year off so so, the spring of 2015 would prove to be a rough time for daddy.  

So I message Ripoff on SA and play the waiting game. After a few days she messages back. A few pleasantries are dispensed with the back and forth before we move on to texting.

After several texts Ripoff brings up money – not an allowance. Baby hits me with the stress method. Tells me her rent is due and she’s about to be put out.  

I don’t mind the stress method. Just use it in context. If it’s the middle of the month and you haven’t paid your rent then that’s just ratchet. The rent stress method makes more sense if ran at the end of the month or beginning. Just FYI if you’re using this. Don’t insult daddy’s intelligence. Also, my personal rule for any stress technique is to keep it transactional. No honey…no money. I know I’ll get hate mail for that one. But those are my own personal rules.

I get her to send more pics and she does, a few of which she shouldn’t have. I can tell from the bad ones the apartment is nowhere near the amount she’s asking.  I play along with her story, and before long I’ve shaved off a few $$$$ from her request. Suddenly she shifts from needing rent to needing to get her water bill paid.  Judging by her apartment pics no way she’s paying that much on water either. And I see baby stuff in the background. Not looking good. But, I cut her some slack not because she deserved it but more because the year had been rough.  

I agree to the amount for the water bill and we’re supposed to meet.  She says she’ll meet me at the hotel and she wants the money up front. Nope. No smash and dash here baby. We argue over that and then stop talking. She text me randomly over the next few days or so, testing the waters and trying to guilt me into giving her the cash. Not interested.

We stop talking for a few weeks and then she messages me on SA. Says she’s lost my number and would like to start talking again. She’s sweet this time. I like it.

We start back texting and within a couple of days I’m heading over to pick her up. She lives in a neighborhood undergoing gentrification. Million dollars homes tower above $50k houses. Of course I pick her up from the $50k duplex houses. We go for coffee because neither one of us is really hungry. It’s the beginning of the summer so its hot. Baby comes out in blue jean shorts and some type of sports bra. Nice. Ripoff’s a good looking latin chick. Dark brown skin, curly black hair….got that Salma Hayek thing going.

We chit chat. Baby is having a hard time. She moved out of her apartment in with a stripper friend. It was her stripper friend –after Ripoff had showed her our text messages and my pic – that told her she should really try and hook up with me. Stripper friend also told her she’d take me if Ripoff wasn’t interested. Wouldn’t be the first time I was passed around….I’ll blog on that in the future.

Baby opens up and tells me about herself. She hasn’t made the best decisions in life. She’s got two kids –although I couldn’t tell by looking at her. Stomach was flat and tight. Her mother has custody and mother also has the car she bought. Ripoff hasn’t been very responsible – half taking care of the kids and missing car note payments. She needs me to do these things for her. Get her life back together. She convinces me that she’s ready to change and get back on track. After she sees the wide-eyed look on my face she says, “Yea I know it’s a lot baby. I hope I don’t scare you off….”

I’ve seen worse. Cap’n Sav-A-Hoe to the rescue. I’ll gladly put on my cape and save her. Up Up and Away!!! Wouldn’t be the first time. I tell her I’m cool with everything and she’s ecstatic. She’s got a place through some city program and she needs help getting a U-haul to move her stuff in. She just wants someone stable. A father figure.  I’m good with it all. We talk more about her interest. Turns out she’s fairly decent chick.  Ripoff has some decent career plans and big things on her wish list. She shows me a few pics where she’s appeared in some rap videos, one of them being a fairly new up and coming guy.

Damn. I’m about to lay a video hoe? Gotta love the sugar bowl.

And she’s been on the album covers of some local talent. Not too shabby. She tells me she’s been living the life, turning up, and she’s lost everything because she’s ignored her responsibility.  

It’s plausible. But, I’m still a little confused about how she lost her kids, and being so irresponsible with car notes given the company she keeps. Somebody should have been shelling out some cash on baby. But hey it is what is.

We end up kissing and making out. Baby likes me suddenly. Tells me my eyes pretty – ok you can stop now. The other patrons take note of our PDA. Even though no cash was discussed for today in particular, baby wants to get her nails and feet done so she can feel good about herself again. Life’s been so tough. She wants new shoes and to go shopping but I tell her designer items are not good for the homeless. I tell her she needs to get her priorities straight. She frowns and I can tell I hit a nerve but she nods and agrees. She knows I’m right. I pull out some cash and give her some. She can’t do anything sexually because she’s on her period. But that’s cool. The game has taught me not to expect the kitty on the first date.

I cut the date short and head back to her place. When she finds out I occasionally get pedicures and manicures she wants to go together. Cool with me. I know some upscale places that serve wine during the service. She really likes that.

We kiss and say goodbye. We’re going to hook up in a couple of days and start our arrangement. Maybe after the mani/pedi.  However, within two days the ratchetness is back. She’s doing all the things again that stopped me from talking to her the first time.  And the promise of our mani/pedi date is gone. She went ahead and got it already because she was near the place. Damn that was going to be our icebreaker.

Its like our conversation at Starbucks went completely out the window. Now, she needs emergency money again, needs help buying a bed for her new place, blah blah and pretty soon she’s got a whole list of new needs. Fuck it. I drop a few stacks to solve all of her immediate problems. Under normal circumstances this wouldn’t be too bad. But my gut, my instincts say I need to close the deal and smash before I do any major cash outlay. But I give her the benefit of the doubt and I feel the need to step up my game since she’s dealing with rappers and entertainers.

Despite this, the bullshit keeps up for a few more days….now she needs me to rent a car so she can get around. She needs a deposit for the lights.  I start ignoring her but some part of me likes Ripoff. If I’m going to salvage anything with her I need to play it safe. Fuck it, I’m already financially invested in her. Might as well see it through. So I tell her let’s start our arrangement and then we can work on getting the rest of things she needs.

Her parents having her kids and car, and the fact that she lives with her friend says she’s irresponsible and can’t keep up with commitments and obligations.  I need to smash and get it over with at this point. Make sure she’s even sincere about this whole thing. Action always speaks louder than words. I know…probably more hate notes and mail. She gives me the dance around with getting started. Suddenly she’s busy doing this and that and dodging the arrangement.

Baby goes MIA for a week. One day, I text her. This will be my last attempt. She answers right away. I tell her I want to start over. Forget the money I’ve already given her. I tell her I want to come through and spend time with her. Of course I’ll have some cash when I come. Baby says ok. We set up the time and before long I’m on my way.

Ripoff answers the door looking good. Her hair is slightly damp from a recent shower and I can tell she’s not wearing underwear in those blue jean shorts. We catch up and both confess we haven’t handled this well. Then baby goes over to a nearby basket of clothes and grabs a piece of lingerie.  She asks for the money  and then tells me she’s going to go change. She goes to a room and closes the door.

Then I hear her lock the door. WTF?

After a moment she says you can come in baby…..I jump up, full of weeks of anticipation and walk towards the door. As I put my hand on the door knob, the door to the apt/duplex opens. A guy walks in on the phone.

“What the fuck?” he says looking at me crazy. Then he starts yelling  “Who are you? “ and “Who are you here to see” and then “I know you’re not here for Ripoff. That’s my girl man. We about to have some problems.” Blah blah

Surprisingly I’m relaxed. I try the door handle but its still locked. I tell her to come out but she doesn’t answer. Meanwhile this lil short midget thug is talking shit on the phone.  “Man I just went to the store and came back and this mofo at my house….” Now I know I’ve been setup. Then he hangs up like he’s going to do something. We he sees I’m not scared he’s like, “We gonna have to go outside and talk about this.” One backhand and a couple of jabs and I’d have this guy taken care of. A kick on the cheap ass door would allow me entry into the room where Ripoff is.

No sooner then I think it then I realize the real danger I was in. The legal danger. In a flash I realize if I kick ass and get my money back  I could have all kinds of legal problems. It’ll be there two words against mine. And it is it really worth my Director title at work, my job potentially, not to mention the embarrassment.

I decide to bounce. I got enough cash to play another day.  

I get outside and he’s still talking shit. I tell him they got a pretty good scam going but karma is a bitch.  “My guess is you target professional men with a lot to loose. Nice. But be careful, you could run across the wrong guy.” He starts cursing me out. By then I’m out of the drive way and heading to my car. I see some of his boys waiting on the other side of the house. Now I get the sense of the real danger I was in.

The cash they stole was nominal. Glad I followed my instincts and didn’t buy ALL the shit she asked for.

In the end I chalk it up to the game. I consider dumping my SA account. Too grimey. Now it’s almost June. I’m hoping this summer gets better because 2015 hasn’t been good to daddy. I start to miss the old days when a daddy could post an ad on CL and call it a day.

A few weeks later I get a message from newbie named Kansas. I’ll post on her next time.

PS., excuse any grammatical errors, etc. I wrote this story on my lunch break