#i made these during the first week of september and don't have anything else to post so

[divorcedtom]

when you’re in love with two people but neither of them want you back

[invisobang]

Artist sign-ups opening soon!

For those of you who don't know, Invisobang is a collaborative event for authors and artists. Over the course of several months, authors write fanfics and artists create art for those fics!

If you want to connect with other creators in the Phandom, this is the event for you!

How does it work?

Authors begin writing as soon as they sign up. Their goal is to write a fic with 5000 words minimum, although there is no maximum. Halfway through the event, they anonymously submit a profile of their fic.

Using these profiles, artists pick the fics that interest them the most and submit a claim. Mods will pair up authors and artists based on these claims.

During the second half of the event, authors finish their stories while artists make their art.

At the end of the event, participants share their work during posting week to create a big bang of content for everyone to ooh and aah at!

When is it, and how do I sign up?

Invisobang runs from February 14 to September 7. Author and artist sign-ups are staggered, while beta sign-ups are open for the first half of the event. Each role has a Google Form that will be posted when sign-ups open.

Authors: February 14–March 15 (CLOSED)

Betas: February 14–June 15 (OPEN)

Artists: May 16–June 15 (OPENING SOON)

Anything else I need to know?

The event is hosted through the Invisobang Discord. Participants must have a Discord account and be willing to join.

Artists must be able to make visual art or music, although you can make alternative art if your author is interested.

All content must be made new for the event.

See the Invisobang info doc for information on rules, frequently asked questions, and the event schedule. If you still have questions after that, send it to the blog, or dm a mod (@kinglazrus, @bibliophilea, @strawberrycamel, and @underforeversgrace).

[pandorasword]

idea: chaeri taking hongjoong to a gp cause he barely even knows what f1 is

Chaeri as the 8th and youngest member of BTS.

CHAERI'S MASTERLIST

requests are open (even if it takes a while) Hi! Thanks for the request, sorry for being so late lol. Hope you enjoy ♡

blue sentences are spoken in french, green ones in english

Checkered Flag for Love 🏁

September/October, 2022

A week before 🏁

჻ Chaeri was exhausted. Her latest group activities with BTS and her first solo ones were making her schedule so full that she barely had time for herself

჻ In the 48 hours before landing back in Korea she could count having slept a total of 3 1/2 hours

჻ Paparazzi and fans were outside and inside the airport as always to greet her and welcome her back home.

჻ She chose not to take off her sunglasses and mask as her usual but simply waved as she tried to get out of the chaos surrounding her as soon as possible

჻ She just wanted to get into the big dark-windowed car where Hongjoong was waiting for her

჻ As she entered the car she found her boyfriend's arms holding her.

჻ The photographers' flashes lighted up the dim vehicle interior until her bodyguard closed the door, dividing them from the world outside

჻ "So tired, aren't you?"

჻ Hongjoong, with whom Chaeri had kept in touch as much as possible during her busy agenda, knew that the last few weeks had been tough for her, but those last two days especially

჻ Chaeri took off her glasses and mask, nodded and let him lay her head on his shoulder

჻ "Rest, I will wake you up when we get there."

჻ Whenever Chaeri spends nights at Ateez dorm, Seonghwa moves to Yunho and San's room, for obvious reasons

჻ It may have been the jet lag, exhaustion, almost 48 hours without closing her eyes, but as Hongjoong told her to get into bed, she slept for an endless time

჻ So long that the boy kept going up to her from time to time to ask her if she was hungry or needed anything else

჻ Chaeri walked out of the room, still in her night clothes and with hair that had lost its straightening, appearing wavy

჻ "What day is it?"

჻ Yunho and San couldn't hold back a laugh, having to take a long sip of water to down the fried chicken they were eating without choking on it

჻ "Don't people usually ask what time it is as soon as they wake up?"

჻ "So funny early in the morning, San-ah."

჻ "It's actually 4 pm, and it's Sunday."

჻ It took her several seconds and a stolen chicken wing from the carton of the boys in front of her to process what they had told her

჻ "It's Sunday?!"

჻ "Yes, wh-"

჻ Biting into some of the fowl in her hands she was quick to grab the remote control laid on the table and change the channel

჻ "I was watching the show!"

჻ "You're right, you're right. Sorry, I'll make it up to you, but we can't miss the grand prix."

჻ "It's not fair, they should all start from the same spot."

჻ "There was qualifying yesterday, the driver who sets the fastest lap time in it starts in pole position, which is the front of the grid. The other drivers line up behind him, in order of their qualifying times. So it's only fair that they are in different position."

჻ The more time passed, the more the two boys beside her seemed to be drawn to the sport

჻ Just as Leclerc's red Ferrari was overtaken by Perez, Hongjoong and Seonghwa made their way into the living room

჻ "Fuck!"

჻ "Good morning to you too, hon."

჻ Joong lowered himself toward her to stamp a kiss on her lips

჻ "Redbull just passed Ferrari," she said, to justify her frown. "and it means that redbull is going to win, again"

჻ "Wait, are we talking about the drink?"

჻ Chaeri glanced at him with an unreadable expression, at which Yunho cut in

჻ "Redbull is the racing car team that competes in formula one, and Ferrari is more or less its rival. And Chaeri-"

჻ Chaeri interrupted him, "And we cheer Ferrari because the driver is my friend" "Have you really never seen a race?"

჻ "Never"

჻ Chaeri clicked the tongue against her palate, bringing her eyes back to the television " Pretty disappointing."

჻ "I can't believe I agreed to this. I had so much work to finish this weekend."

჻ "You're the best, I'm sure you can finish it in half the time."

჻ "You are flattering me"

჻ "Babe, we had a problem to solve."

჻ "A problem?!"

჻ "Do you really think I was still going to put up with the fact that my boyfriend has never seen a formula one race?"

჻ "Yeah, I mean, I can understand that. Gosh, actually, I can understand it if you're the one to say it but… we could have seen it on TV instead of flying to Singapore so suddenly"

჻ "It will be worth it, I promise."

჻ It had been a while since Chaeri was seen in person at a formula one event.

჻ Following her impact during the grand prix opening a few years earlier, Chaeri's face was now easily associated with the motorsport

჻ Journalists and paparazzi were delighted to capture her hand-in-hand with her new boyfriend strolling along the paddock, badges dangling around their neck and outfits that stood out from the rest of the guests there

჻ No one knew they would be there, as it was such a sudden departure

჻ No one except two of the closest friends Chaeri had managed to make in those years: Pierre Gasly and Charles Leclerc

჻ Pierre and Charles were inseparable so, when she became friends with Pierre, it was inevitable not to establish a bond with the ferrari driver as well

჻ It was with the Frenchman that she first came across, in the paddock.

჻ The boy spread his arms wide to greet her, a hug she did not shy away from

჻ "So nice to see you again," in his perfect French accent, the boy took a few seconds before noticing Hongjoong's presence a step away from them

჻ "Same here. Please speak English so I can introduce you to my boyfriend" "Hongjoong, Pierre. Pierre, Hongjoong."

჻ Joong extended his hand to introduce himself, a smile dying shortly after he got a better look at his face

჻ "Are you introducing me to your past affair?!" The ATEEZ captain's eyes seemed to be about to pop out of their sockets, voluntarily dismissing the idea of speaking in English

჻ Joong remembered vividly the video leaked on the articles of all the Korean news magazines of her dancing with Pierre at a club years before

჻ Chaeri could not hold back a laugh "Babe, he is only ever been a friend."

჻ Hongjoong had no choice but to be dramatic (in a non-serious way) to give her a hard time until the race began and they were escorted to see it in a preferential spot

჻ As the cars prepared for the start, Chaeri explained to Hongjoong the importance of the start and how the drivers had to try to avoid getting stuck in traffic.

჻ "It's like the start of a marathon," explained Chaeri, "You don't want to fall behind or you'll be forced to do everything possible to catch up."

჻ "It's incredible how these drivers can maintain control of the car at those speeds"

჻ "Yes, and then there are the team strategies, like the choice of pit stops, that can make all the difference."

჻ As the race reached its climax. Leclerc and Perez were neck and neck, fighting for the top position. The girl couldn't help but feel her heart racing with excitement. "I can't believe how close it is"

჻ "It's so intense. I never knew watching a race could be so exciting." and he was really amazed by that

჻ As the final lap approached, the tension grew even higher. Chaeri and Hongjoong could both feel the adrenaline pumping through their veins. Finally, the race came to an end, and the winner was announced: Redbull

჻ While Chaeri was a bit disappointed by another second-place result from Charles, Hongjoong who had simply enjoyed the race without having matured any preferences yet felt the need to release the adrenaline built up during the race

჻ "That was fucking beautiful" He took her face in his hands to give her kiss that had nothing gentle in it

჻ It cannot be said that that race was a checkered flag for her favorite team, but it was definitely a checkered flag for her love

taglist: @alixnsuperstxr

[chayscribbles]

chayscribbles’ monthly writing update ☆ august/september 2023 double feature

☆ STATISTICS.

words written: 4273 in august; none in september BUT that's because i did a lot of revising

projects worked on: Gemini Heist in august; Andromeda Rogue in september, then procrastinated so hard i ended up writing a few paragraphs on Third, Secret Wip

proudest accomplishment: i compiled all my AR1 beta feedback without giving in to the urge to set the book on fire and also myself

books read: Network Effect (Murderbot Diaries #5) by Martha Wells

☆ GENERAL COMMENTS.

so basically i started off august decently solid, working on gemini heist while andromeda rogue was off being torn apart by the betas. (i'm joking. it didn't get torn apart. i think you guys were being way too nice actually.)

and then all kinds of shit hit the fan in my personal life all at once in mid-august. both good and bad. it was a lot.

anyways the first half of september was spent recovering from all that, BUT i took a week off work mid-september to catch my breath and also get back into writing, and it was really good for me.

on another note! i am very seriously considering making an etsy shop for some of my art, because as much as i loathe the thought of monetizing my hobbies, we are living in a cost of living crisis, and i don't wanna be in my ice water soup era forever, ha. anyways stay tuned. (and if you think it would be a good idea/you think yourself or others would be interested in buying things PLEASE LET ME KNOW. EXPLICITLY. because otherwise i will assume no one cares and the idea will fizzle out.)

more specific wip-related comments + featured excerpt below.

☆ COMMENTS: ANDROMEDA ROGUE (draft 2 editing)

i went through all the beta comments during my week off and while i am glad it doesn't look like i'll have to do any more BIG rewrites, editing sucks and i want to give up.

☆ COMMENTS: THE GEMINI HEIST (draft 0.5. okay fine it's draft 1 but i feel better about myself if i call it draft 0.5 okay)

honestly when i was working on this feels sooo long ago i don't even remember what there is to say?

i hit 20K at some point in august. i think.

OH YEAH i "finished" act 2/7. the quotation marks are because i absolutely did not finish it, i only finished writing all the main plot-relevant scenes and skipped anything else. which means there's like a whole chapter and a half that haven't actually been written bc they're probably gonna be exposition or character building stuff that i haven't figured out yet and i'm hoping will be easier once i know what actually happens in the rest of this story. (reminder that i am a plantser.)

anyways i suspect this wip will be going dormant again for a while as i focus on getting AR ready for publishing. (sidenote it's been over a year since i started the GH draft and i feel like i've done fuck all on it besides come up with useless lore and make extremely specific playlists. world's slowest writer. the playlists slap, though.)

☆ FEATURED EXCERPT.

uh have this random snippet of Euna about to pop off!

Somewhere far, far, away, Leo was shouting, “Just get your ass out of there, Li!” but her voice seemed muffled in Euna’s ears, blocked out by the rage that had been steadily mounting ever since that guard shot her arm and ruined the fight for her. All she could hear was the blood rushing through her own ears, the buzz of the guard’s electrified gauntlets, the crackle of the electricity in her own hand. She reared her good fist back and slammed it into the guard’s face. Their nose made a sickening crunch against Euna’s knuckles. Blood flowed down over their mouth and chin as they staggered back, but Euna wasn't done. Her right arm, still spouting sparks, swung into the side of their head, finally bringing them down. Before they could get up again, Euna dropped on top of them, pinning them to the ground with her knees on their chest. She grabbed their shoulders and yanked their upper body off the floor, preparing to slam them down one last time— Purple light surrounded her. For a frightening second, she couldn’t move. Then she was thrown off the guard and dragged, upside-down, through the air towards the exit.

☆ TAGLISTS. let me know if you want to be added/removed to any of them.

general taglist:

@nicola-writes @dgwriteblr @the-orangeauthor @onomatopiya @quilloftheclouds @ashen-crest @writeblrfantasy @celestepens @stardustspiral @pepperdee @extra-magichours @avi-why @lefttigerobservation @chazzawrites @bardolatrycore @innocentlymacabre

andromeda trilogy taglist:

@bebewrites @nicola-writes @dgwriteblr @the-orangeauthor @onomatopiya @akindofmagictoo @quilloftheclouds @nora-theteawriter @ashen-crest @corpsepng @writeblrfantasy @toboldlywrite @celestepens @stardustspiral @pepperdee @cheerfulmelancholies @extra-magichours @writeouswriter @cilly-the-writer @lefttigerobservation @rose-bookblood @drowsy-quill @chazzawrites @cynic-and-chief @enchanted-lightning-aes @aesa @outpost51

gemini heist taglist:

@florraisons @akindofmagictoo @cream-and-tea @nicola-writes @memento-morri-writes @antique-symbolism @rose-bookblood @afoolandathief @pepperdee @avi-why @zonnemaagd @chazzawrites @analogued @enchanted-lightning-aes @innocentlymacabre @kahvilahuhut @celestepens @cilly-the-writer @extra-magichours @onomatopiya @outpost51

[sapfromsaplings]

"passion."

(September 7-8, 2023)

i grew up a tomboy: refusing to wear dresses, skirts, even a shirt, or anything that made me seem like a girl. while being a girl. i refused to participate in "girly" things: i never liked dolls, i never liked to paint my nails, talk about boys, found makeup talk silly, and anything else your typical girl does. so, eventually, i grew up. i still refuse to wear dresses, skirts, and anything that even hints at the fact that i'm stuck with the body i was born with, but i try to hide it behind my hair that cuts off at my shoulders, my baggy clothes that resist me but show off their wrinkles instead, and a gym that has the capacity to mold people in who they wanna be, a perfect place for me. i still refuse to participate in "girly" things: i still don't like dolls, sometimes i paint my nails darker than the night sky, the only color that will allow me to be masculine, but then that makes me "gay," and that definitely doesn't make me a man.

a boy handed me my first rejection. i can still picture him now: his blonde hair, his tall structure, and the nice way he treated me when we were in fifth grade. i was young, gullible, and naive. it didn't bother me at all, but then i went chasing after girls who introduced me to my first heartbreaks. rejection transformed me into an individual who could handle pain, bury away my emotions, and keep my mouth closed. but my body language constantly betrays my mind: eyes lingering on girls i find attractive, my face flushing when met face-to-face with said girls, and a normally confident brain that turns into mush at the worst moments. alas, my heart beats fast for anyone.

i handle the pain inside, and bury away my emotions because of my family. born hispanic, raised white.

almost.

my father's american identity has warped itself onto i, leaving behind the memories and hopes of my mother's culture. my mother vowed to teach us children spanish, but her tongue refused, and well, we did too. i try to pick up the bits and pieces of whatever hope there is left of me discovering the rest of my culture, and establishing pride within my mother's side of the family, but a lot of them are missing forever.

my father speaks proudly of that of being an american, and i suppose that isn't the worst thing in the world, but he is rash, stubborn and decisive. it takes much to change his mind, and he inhales the propaganda of politics. he awaits for my brother to take his place and become a man. they get along much better than him and i, and i worry he won't ever see me as his son. he believes a man shouldn't cry, should be strong, and reaffirms that "boys will be boys." breaking down in front of him is an embarrassment, his emotional unavailability unable to comfort. crying in my house is seen as being "sensitive" and "manipulative," tears spilled during our youth confirming such to them. so the shower brushes the tears off my cheeks, clears my red-stained eyes, and reassures me that it's gonna be okay.

when my bathroom cannot save me, i go outside. i walk twenty minutes to a gym i adore, and i work myself to the extreme. my progress is reflected in photos and occasional giddy gazes into the mirror, i joke that i'm strong, but am i? an orange ball works my brain more than my brawn, and grinding for half of a summer amplified my abilities and my confidence. i bond with kids at a court i go to and i express myself, albeit lying in the process. although, i feel free there.

after long weeks of destressing externally, unable to find hope within the people around me, my spark has been ignited, the strokes of my keyboard fueling the energy behind the words i write. emotions have scattered hundreds of poems in a corner of a notes app: where so much pain, and joy, lies reflected in the titles and beginning lines. anyone reading them could be heartstruck, concerned, moved, and that's the beauty of poetry. poetry reflects what's within all of us in one way or another, and that's why the passion identity behind it shall never f a d e a w a y or escape me completely.

[2004kitten]

to mr b. and to anyone who may resonate with these words, sincerely <3

on the last day of june classes ended. last day there as a student… i feel emotional because this is the place where i healed from so much pain. before i started attending this study center I was sure that I would never graduate. so many problems at home, d3pr3ss10n, su1dc1d4l t3nd3nc13s… I barely smiled anymore. this school was my last resort.

& all the people I've met here have saved me in one way or another. all of them.

but you… god, you made me come to life again.

it was without even realizing it that I remained bewitched by your gaze, your laughter, your way of teaching, how you seemed to have something intelligent and funny to say about any topic.

i still don’t know how my feelings grew so much, even going against my own will, but perhaps the only answer is this: b., you make me feel positive.

on the last day of school there was lots of hugging and lots of teary eyes: during these years both teachers and students have entered each other's hearts. last day for us graduating, and of course it had to be raining. the two of us left school together, I don't know if you were waiting for me, but I was, I was waiting for you, I didn't want to say goodbye to you in front of everyone, I had to do something - I don't know what, anything - where it was just you and me.

you stood at the bus stop, to shelter yourself from the rain, when you could’ve just gone home.

but you stayed, holding me in your arms as i cried.

you called me beautiful, and you let me hug you. you touched my face and caressed my cheek. when I told you "you don't know how much i’ll miss you" you replied "I'm here, send me a message when you feel like it, and come to school to say hi whenever you want " but we both know that’s not what i meant and so I just repeated "you don't know how much I'll miss you".

you told me to smile and to be happy.

you told me that since we are no longer professor and student things will be easier.

you told me to be happy.

we hugged one last time and then you left, shirt wet from rain and from my tears (I hope I didn’t stain it with mascara).

you told me to be happy.

it’s been weeks and i still haven’t texted you, not even about my finals.

you told me to be happy.

i think about you often, but i’m trying to move on. there’s this guy who asked me out the other day, and for the first time in a while i opened my mind to the possibility of liking someone else. it will never be the same, we both know that. you’ll forever remain my one true love, the reason i’m alive today, the reason i’m able to see a future for myself. a future where, realistically, we’ll never be more than this.

you told me to be happy.

you, my main source of happiness, told me this and i don’t know why but it felt like a goodbye.

maybe i’ll come to say hi in september… maybe not. one thing’s for sure, by then you’ll still be inside of my heart, but hopefully, free from my mind.

grazie b.

infinitamente e per sempre tua,

lola

[inkofamethyst]

September 26, 2023

I would first like to reiterate: H O U S E.

Okay!

So last weekend I went to a club for the very first time (I know, shocking) with the three girls I've been hanging out with recently, and it was certainly An Experience. Lots of bodies, lots of jostling (I vividly remember thinking "this is what a cell must feel like during gastrulation" which I feel like is generally not something people think about on a Friday night), the occasional brush of my skin against someone else's which made me want to puke, strobe lighting, jumping, etc. Higher ceilings and cleaner floors than the last party I went to four years ago. I only really have one Going Out Top (I altered it this summer so it fits amazinggg) and the color accidentally coordinated with the other girls' getups so that was fun, we were a unit. Um, somehow pretty privilege (and perhaps a bit of being woc in a club that noticeably (but not necessarily oppressively) lacked poc rep, but that's more of my own speculation) allowed us to skip the line? I won't expect that ever again but it was kind of great because it was chilly outside. Admittedly, what was not so great was how I accepted a side hug from a random dude with clammy skin who I did not know and who was dreadfully inebriated, but that was because the initial shock of his breath which was just drenched in alcohol (and also because one of the girls I was with fully leaned into pretending to know this guy to jump the line which worked (he had pregamed hard) but I fell for her acting too and actually thought this was someone she knew when it was most certainly not). I honestly just don't have enough life experience to know how to navigate situations like that in a way that maintains my comfort. Another downside to, well, being genuinely pretty boring. You never have to develop a failsafe to someone bringing you in for an unwanted hug (which by the way I'm generally not a hugger but I kind of have to just go with it for family but those were the only situations in which I would regularly be expected to hug) when you don't really ever go out lol. It happened twice last weekend (I'm not even going to get into the second time because not to victim blame or anything but letting that one happen was on me even though the guy totally shouldn't've gone for it in the first place, I absolutely could have and should have stopped it). So. Now I need an escape plan for the future. Since I'm a social butterfly or whatever now apparently.

Also,,,, definitely feeling the academic rigor that comes with going to school at an academically rigorous institution. Midterm season starts next week, and I can already tell that it's going to be tough. Lots to memorize for anatomy, lots of application in regen, lots of synthesis in devbio. lovely. And all in like the span of a single week too. Plus I'm supposed to start lab work during that same week. I think regen is going to be the most difficult, but none of them will be particularly easy.

Today I'm thankful that the paper I have to present on in regen this week is relatively straightforward. I'm getting better at getting through them! I'm also thankful that my partner for the presentation is an ultra competent undergrad. We've got this in the bag.

I've been dreadfully unproductive the past couple of days, but I made a to-do list this afternoon and was able to cross off every last thing which usually doesn't happen. Granted, many of the things on the list weren't all that difficult, but they were all things that needed to get done, and sometimes you need little wins.

I'll make a list for tomorrow, too. Gotta start including studying on it.

[catboy-jaebeom]

week seven of #got7revival: the moment that made you an ahgase

this question is incredibly hard to answer, because I don't think it was one single moment, it was a couple that made me think "okay, yeah, maybe I'm in this deeper than I thought" and then didn't turn back around, lol, because I didn't feel I really wanted to. so, here's a few moments during the last one year and eight month since I got into kpop and GOT7.

late-March 2021

I am looking for faceclaims for my original characters and Pinterest offers me the famous pictures of Jaebeom and that shoot on the rooftop with his anti-eyebrow piercing and the nose ring, and I am gone. my friend A shows me another one of them and kinda looks up GOT7 out curiosity and sends me some of their songs; I spend the next few hours — and days — on a deep dive into the rabbit hole, and the rest is history.

July 2021

A sends me the bodyshop ad Youngjae did for that white musk perfume. I'm out with friends at the time and in the inner city, shopping district. about twenty minutes later I've bought the shower gel of that line. I tell another kpop friend ( a veteran army and atiny ) that I think now that I've actually bought a product simply because one of my kpop boys has promoted it ( and of course because I actually love the smell ) there is no going back for me. she laughs but agrees.

late summer 2021

curious about Jinyoung's acting efforts, A and I watch He Is Psychometric and love it, and then start with The Devil's Judge ( which I have yet to finish, yes, I know, gods, where has the past year gone to wjkddk ). I also watch Yaksha on release date in April the following year.

mostly winter 2021

Mark releases a couple songs and I remember writing a whole Text on how My Life has moved me. ( tho I've never sent it to him or anything, but man, My Life. )

April 2022

for my ahgase anniversary I create a fan twt account, and my first tweet is something along the lines of "now that we might be getting a comeback soon, I might as well." mind you, that was before they ever confirmed anything, but that was definitely one of the moments where I realized that, yes, I'm definitely in this for the long run now.

May 5th 2022

the Yugyeom concert in Berlin!! my very first kpop concert ever, and my gods was it good. I won't forget meeting so many kind ahgase who immediately adopted me when realizing how baby I was in terms of being an ahgase. and I definitely won't forget Yugyeom performing and dancing and speaking English ;; it was a great day.

May 21st – May 23rd 2022

comeback weekend !!!! I talked about that already in my Fave Era post, but the fun we had not only on that weekend but also in the weeks leading up to it with all the concept pictures and the teaser for the album tracks and the MV, and then when we edited all those hardhats onto our icons and all. what a good time that was, wow. also when JayB managed to transfer the rights for GOT7 and all the music and all that, I remember I was so incredibly proud of him, of them, and of me in a way because I had clearly picked the right group to stan.

September-ish 2022

since I kept talking about GOT7 and other kpop groups to one of my mutuals on here, he asked to listen to them, whether I could send him some MV or song to listen to, one that I recommend. ever since, I keep throwing him new videos and have made playlists and share exciting news with him, and I feel if you're at the point where you can casually and calmly recommend their music to someone else and it feels great to see them like your group, you've definitely earned your place, right?

Honourable Mentions

somewhen in April last year I was watching one of those things you didn't notice in ____ videos, and finally realized that Mark is in fact the oldest and not the maknae. yes, he fooled another one. that was also the moment I realised I finally knew all of their names and could attach them to faces so that was nice.

when I listened to the mindset clips Jaebeom had made, and felt so very comforted and understood. him sharing all of that is something very precious to me, I feel honoured he did that and that we are able to hear it. I think he's helping so many people with it.

that afternoon a few months ago when I went through yt and watched a lot of X reacts to GOT7 for the first time videos, and let me tell you how much fun it was to, like, see them fall in love, vibe with the songs, and point out certain members like I had a year prior. also the amounts of time people already knew Jackson but nobody else kadkkfkdd.

anyway, thank you @def-jaes for hosting this GOT7 revival this was so so so much fun! especially to see everyone come together and create !! we should do that more often <3

[weirdstuffthathappens]

I posted 260 times in 2022

That's 260 more posts than 2021!

26 posts created (10%)

234 posts reblogged (90%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ tmbgareok

@animatedglittergraphics-n-more

@nostalgia-mind-prison1995

@bye2k

@fuzzyghost

I tagged 128 of my posts in 2022

#the q - 7 posts

#homestar runner - 5 posts

#website - 5 posts

#halloween - 4 posts

#calorific rays - 3 posts

#daily facts - 3 posts

#alt rock - 3 posts

#picrew - 3 posts

#look at him go - 2 posts

#internet - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 46 characters

#even if you cant fix him you can draw him well

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Happy Labor Daybor!

22 notes - Posted September 5, 2022

#4

38 notes - Posted October 21, 2022

#3

Yahoo come check out my first Picrew! you decorate pumpkins! 

41 notes - Posted September 19, 2022

#2

This Halloween I’m gonna help my friend Joey on a personal lost media search! Check out what info we got so far and stay tuned for more details!

46 notes - Posted October 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I’m proud of how this one came out so I’m making sure to share it

50 notes - Posted August 20, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[breakingnewsbreakthrough]

Wednesday, September 18, 2024

A man named Connor Stalions, The Manhattan Project, and Mr. Brainworm Kennedy Jr.

2:17pm, EDT: "Fed cuts interest rates for the first time in more than 4 years"

My high school economics teacher would shake his head in disappointment at this, but I truly have no idea what this means. If you asked me, I could provide you some sort of explanation that will, at first glance, appear plausible, but really I don't know anything about this. Something something people will borrow more money now. Maybe. I just keep thinking about that one clip of Elizabeth Warren questioning the guy in charge (chairman?) of the Fed about whether raising interest rates will fix the economy and him going "no."

5:02pm, EDT: "MSU: Future games with CMU 'potentially' in jeopardy amid Connor Stalions investigation"

God, I truly cannot bring myself to follow this sign-stealing scandal. Not even a mysterious, camera-dodging man named "Connor Stalions" can make me care. Although, given the fact he's made himself radioactive to college football programs, he may have a yet-unrecognized future in the porn industry.

5:20pm, EDT: "Judge blocks Wayne County landfill from importing radioactive waste"

This headline, despite not including the lede, buries the lede. This isn't your run of the mill radioactive waste. This is radioactive waste from The Manhattan Project. Somehow we still have it. Somehow it still needs to be disposed of. Apparently Wayne County isn't the place, which is shocking, considering our reputation as a shithole dumping ground for criminals and stuff no one else wants.

5:39pm, EDT: "'Horrific' child sex crimes send Austin and Todd Sabb-Visga to lengthy prison term"

Putting aside justice being served and hope for the victims and whatnot, I worry about what this means for gay people in St. Clair County. Some parts of Michigan may as well be the Antebellum South with how intolerant and backwards they are, and two formerly-respected gay men turning out to be massive predators does not bode well for the functioning and well-adjusted queer people in that area. I don't know, maybe it's just easier for me to find the downside (is there a term for the opposite of a silver lining?) in every situation.

5:47pm, EDT: "Wayne County prosecutor: No Charges in Eastern Market shooting"

They're claiming it was self-defense. I don't know who said what, who threatened who, or how many weapons were present, but two people are dead. That's not a senseless tragedy that we shake our heads at and throw up our hands to, unable to make any changes to prevent this from happening again. Criminal charges are besides the point, this man should not have a gun again. He should not have been able to bring one to a heavily-trafficked area during a tailgate. No one should be able to do that. The part of me that wants prison abolition is happy he won't see jail time. The part of me that abhors guns is angry. I cannot reconcile the two right now.

5:55pm, EDT: "Robert F. Kennedy Jr. again loses in bid to get off Michigan's presidential ballot"

This just in: man cannot stop taking Ls! I'm actually curious to see if this will draw votes this election, and if so, from who. His mad scramble to remove himself suggests that he thinks that Trump will suffer if he draws votes, and (as much as I hate to say it), I agree with ol' RFK Jr.

9:51pm, EDT: "Search for suspect in Kentucky shooting ends with discovery of body believed to be his"

I don't think I was following this story, but given the shootings happened two weeks ago, I could have already forgotten. Writing that sentence just made me profoundly sad. I need a beer.

10:29pm, EDT: "Rampaging Tigers, Skubal sweep Royals to move half-game out of playoffs"

I'm so sorry to show my ignorance here, but how does one split a game of baseball in half? What does this mean? Who has a half game? Is it the Tigers? How do they win a half game and get into the playoffs? Many questions, no answers.

On a personal note:

I spoke to my Newswriting professor today, and despite her pleas for The New York Times to become more centrist, it went well. She didn't flat out call me a horrible writer, and was vaguely confused why I wanted to meet at all. I felt stupid the entire time, but I almost always do, especially when I must make myself vulnerable. I mentioned my somewhat childish wish to write like Joan Didion and then didn't see the reaction, but I think she had a bit of a laugh at my expense. I laugh at myself about that one too, if we're being honest. I suppose I won't drop out of journalism school yet, but who knows what the future brings. The only thing that is certain is that nothing is, or whatever.

Until tomorrow,

DM

[anniebeemine]

A little more personal and about my relationship(s), but I have nowhere else to vent.

I had a partner, Noah, from August 2020 to July 2023. He and I were inseparable. We did everything together and he is who I consider to be my first love. In March of 2022, I met the girl who was my best friend, Jane. It got to the point where if I wasn't with Noah, I was with Jane, and vice versa. I brought them up a lot and everyone I met knew about them within the first conversation. I truly love them both.

I noticed that I had feelings for Jane in May 2023. During her birthday celebration, we were drunk and ended up kissing in the back of a bar after sneaking away from our friends. That experience changed everything between us. She was much more affectionate, flirty in texts, etc. She also had a boyfriend at the time which only made it that much more confusing.

I talked to my therapist about it, and considered every possibility under the sun. If I could, I would have moved states and changed my name rather than deal with this head-on. Long story short, around the same time Noah and I broke up, Jane's boyfriend had cheated on her. Noah ended up dating a girl he was close with (and he knew I didn't like her) during our relationship. His best friend hinted that they had been going places behind my back for months and I was deeply hurt. As a result of all of this, Jane and I became extremely close.

We spent a weekend together at a lake house in September 2023, about two months after our breakup. We ended up having sex, but neither one of us mentioned anything for the rest of the trip. We both returned to our normal schedules. I ended up telling her about my feelings for her a few days later, to which she said she doesn't feel the same way and hopes that I find someone eventually. Heartbroken, I told her I understand. She instantly changed the topic and started telling me about her upcoming tinder date, just hours after turning me down.

I spent weeks in bed. I stopped going to class and sorority meetings, eventually getting kicked out of the organization. Anything that involved leaving my room was entirely out of the question. Everything positive I thought about myself was entirely gone in an instant. I thought that if I couldn't be good enough for my best friend, who could I be good enough for?

It's been almost a year since and our relationship never recovered. We stopped talking entirely in May of this year. I've spent the entire summer trying to find the joy in things again, but so much of my life revolved around Jane to the point where I avoid my familiar places. By the beginning of July, around the time I made this account, I finally felt stable.

Today, Jane messaged me out of the blue asking if we can talk. She ended it with saying "I just want to talk to my best friend again."

I'm hurt. I'm offended. I'm scared. I don't want to see her, but I feel like I have to. I spent so long thinking so lowly of myself and just reading the message sent me back to the moment she rejected me. For a year, I locked myself away and never shared any of this with anyone but my therapist. I lost so many friends by refusing to get close again for fear of being hurt. I'm honestly considering deleting the message and leaving it unanswered, but I also want to talk to her again.

[invisobang]

June is fast approaching, and so are artist sign-ups! For those of you who don't know, Invisobang is a collaborative event for authors and artists. Over the course of several months, authors write fanfics and artists create art for those fics!

If you want to connect with other creators in the Phandom, this is the event for you!

How does it work?

Authors begin writing as soon as they sign up. Their goal is to write a fic with 5000 words minimum, although there is no maximum. Halfway through the event, they anonymously submit a profile of their fic.

Using these profiles, artists pick the fics that interest them the most and submit a claim. Mods will pair up authors and artists based on these claims.

During the second half of the event, authors finish their stories while artists make their art.

At the end of the event, participants share their work during posting week to create a big bang of content for everyone to ooh and aah at!

Throughout all of this, participants submit check-ins to keep track of their progress.

When is it and how do I sign up?

Invisobang runs from March 18th to September 7th. Author and artist sign-ups are staggered while beta sign-ups are open for the first half of the event. Each role has a Google Form that will be posted when sign-ups open.

Authors: closed

Betas: March 18th to June 15th

Artists: June 2nd to June 15th

Anything else do I need to know?

The event is hosted through the Invisobang Discord. Because of this, participants must have a Discord account and be willing to join.

Artists must be able to make visual art or music, although you can make alternative art if your author is interested.

All content must be made new for the event.

See the Invisobang info doc for more detailed information on rules, frequently asked questions, and the event schedule. If you still have questions after that, send it to the blog, or dm a mod (@kinglazrus and @bibliophilea).

[whereare-myglasses]

⚠️CONTENT WARNING: DISCUSSION OF SUICIDE AND SEXUAL ASSUALT⚠️

I'm posting this on here because I'm honestly not to sure where else I can talk about it without someone I know irl seeing this.

I recently graduated from a trade program called Job Corps. Basically, you're provided food, clothes, housing, and basic medical care and in return you learn a trade of your choosing. It's made out to be a wonderful opportunity and experience should you choose to do the program. While in some cases it can be, many folks don't have that great experience we're told we'll have.

It's been a few weeks since I graduated amd returned home and I've noticed things that have changed about myself since starting at the program.

1. I can't eat as much as I used to. My center rarely served anything actually edible at meals and when they did, you weren't given quite enough because they needed enough food for everyone to have at least one serving. If they served something at lunch that people barely got, they served it again at dinner to get rid of it. So it wasn't uncommon for us to wait until we're completely done with trade for the day before eating an adequate meal (which we would have to buy ourselves when we visited the nearest Walmart once every 2 weeks. It was a 2 hour round trip and 80% of the center would go. So you had limited space for what you buy). I lost almost 20 pounds in my first 2 months there and I'm STILL not back at the weight I was before starting.

2. I can't trust anyone to do anything they're supposed to. We had COUNTLESS maintenance problems at my center that would go ignored for MONTHS at a time solely because the maintenance crew did not want to do their jobs. In late January of this year, we had a snow and ice storm that had trade canceled for almost 2 weeks. Before and during that time, none of the buildings on my center had ANY heating during the single digit weather. The first couple days, we didn't mind. We spent all day outside playing in the snow anyway. But the temperatures kept dropping both inside and outside and nothing was really being done. We had one or two space heaters per dorm (6 dorms averaging 20-30 people each) that we just had to huddle around during the day. Also in that time, my dorm had an industrial sink that we couldn't use (even though it was required for our daily chores) because a pipe had rusted off completely. We had been putting in maintenance request forms since SEPTEMBER about the leaking sink (keep in mind, this is late January still) and maintenance claimed they didn't even KNOW about it until I personally dragged one of them to look at it while they were working on our heat. At some point, we bypassed the staff request forms altogether and wrote out 2 lists (one staff copy and one student copy) of everything in our dorm that was broken that maintenance needed to fix and made the head of maintenance sign and date both lists so that we all knew they saw what was needed.

3. I no longer feel like I can speak to a person of authority with trust, or at all. There's a HUGE problem with communication across ALL job corps centers in the nation. At my center, we struggled daily to get any information from staff on just about everything. Staff could barely even communicate with each other, but expected us to constantly be on top of things when there we times we didn't even know what we were supposed to be on top of. Rules would change and half the time, you didn't know of a rule change until you or someone you knew got in trouble for breaking said rule. It wasn't uncommon for staff to ask students where a certain staff member was, only for the students to not even realize that staff member was supposed to be in the area. Even without the problem of staff not communicating, there was still the problem of staff not caring. There was a student that started in late November while I was there (I was his fucking mentor) who sexually assaulted about 4 or 5 other male students. There were COUNTLESS written statements (from students) about him bullying others and at least one of his SA victims tried to address it with staff directly, but nothing was done until it was almost too late. Saturday morning in late February, one of his SA victims expressed thoughts of suicide because of what he had gone through. Staff didn't reach out to the student to intervene until Sunday evening when the student tried to take is own life. The next day, staff held an optional meeting with students to express our concerns about the situation and every single time we tried to say something, we were shot down. The meeting ended abruptly when all of the students who attended stormed out and me saying, "All this situation and thus meeting has taught us is that we can't trust staff enough to come forward about anything." I was mentoring again that week and I remember taking some of my new kids in my arms and holding them while they cried because of the situation.

4. I don't really feel like an actual person anymore, just another number. As with all things government, the bottom line always comes first. Staff were overworked and underpaid, buildings were rundown, opportunities to go off center were dwindling down to just going to Walmart once every 2 weeks (my center was around 120ish students and located inside of a national park, it was at least an hour drive to go anywhere), but the center director still did everything possible to fill every single bed to get money that wouldn't even go toward the students. The center director was always saying how she cared about the students but always stonewalled attempts to make things better for us. Job Corps held a national essay contest for its 60th anniversary and I did it cause why not? No harm done if I don't win. Well, I did win. I got first place in my region and was one of the 6 winners across the 100+ centers in the country. I read my essay in an online National office meeting and felt like I was put on a pedestal by my center director. Which I found out I really was being put on a pedestal, as I was the very first person in the 40 something years my center has been open and active to win an award like this. My name and center was put on a flyers for every job corps center to see along with the other 5 winners. And while I am proud of myself for my achievement, I can't help but feel like it wasn't really worth it for me. It just seemed like my win was only to make my center look better.

There's other shit but I'm tired, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Since starting at jobcorps, I'm angrier, I'm sadder, I'm less trusting and more judgemental, and I'm scared to do what they've trained me for and enter the workforce because what if it's just like my experience there?

[honeybittersweet]

I HAVE NEWSSSSS (gossip about my life if you will)

Okey so yall don't know shit about this but last year I had A LOT of drama going on and all of that ended up with me finally deciding to cut off ties with a friend, because of a lot of mistreatment towards me, mixed signals, and feeling deeply hurt.

We went our separate ways in September of last year, we study the same degree so we have the same classes and all, anyways, when vacations started in November I didn't see her again until March when we went back to college. The first week even the mere thought of seeing her in class made me wanna throw up. It made anxious, my body was trembling, my hands got sweaty, my heart pounded way too fast, my brain got dizzy, there was a knot in my stomach and looking at her made my heart hurt, and tbh the list could go on and on and on. So the second day I felt this when I saw her, I instantly texted TWO psychologists and signed up at the gym, bc I wasn't going to let her have this power over my emotions and body reactions.

Ofc eventually I gave up the gym thing bc I didn't have time for it, but I kept going to the psychologist I had chosen. I talked about her a lot til I didn't have anything else to say. There were up and downs during those times when I would relapse into justifying her actions and feel sorry for her, but then again I'd remind me of my worth and focus again on myself.

I was scared of when I would have to talk to her again eventually bc we do a lot of group activities and sometimes they're selected by professors. I was scared of how my body and my heart would react. Today was the day and it was amazing.

I felt nothing. I was comfortable in my own skin, my voice didn't shake, I could hold the stare. It was amazing. I didn't even bat an eye at her voice, I didn't care about how she looked, or how she talked to me. It was like talking to any other classmate, it felt so good.

I'm so happy bc finally I'm at the other side of the process, I've healed so much since last June when everything happened and changed so much since March. God, I know past me would be so proud and content of finally being free of that constant anxiety she made me feel. I'm so happy.

[thedrakesteelforge]

明けましておめでとうございます!!!

Happy New year!

We now have 365 days of 2023, We will probably spend half of them still writing 2022 though.

So, This post is going to be a little run down of my year, so I can reflect on my behaviour, attitude, and progress to help myself figure out any new years resolutions. Maybe I can figure out what i need to change to become the person i want to be.

So, The easiest way I can think of is to write the most notable things down each month however, I have forgotten so much of this year. All of the mundane days have faded away. Throughout the year I have had my good days and bad days. these are unavoidable.

January

At the beginning of the year, my grandmother passed away. She was a huge part of my life. she raised me since I was very young.

After her passing, I was only allowed a few days off work to grieve, while someone else in the company got over a month off to grieve for someone that passed in their family. This made me realise, this is not a company I want to keep working for. I'm sure of that.

However, I feel like I was an emotional support pillar for my family. We did become closer during this time. I was the one that broke the news to other members of the family. 

I think my grandma would be proud of that if she saw me.

February

After my grandmother's funeral, I remembered all of the conversations I had with her. My dreams, goals and desires. she was always so supportive, however, for months prior I wasn't doing anything to even achieve these dreams. I wasn't saving money or teaching myself anything I needed to know.

I took a long hard look at myself. These conversations and emotions wouldn't go to waste. so I started saving and studying.

As the new year is upon me. I am proud to say, I have saved and surpassed the minimum required to move abroad. I also have been more or less consistent in my studying.

March

to be truthful I don't remember much of March. I checked my camera roll and noticed this was the month I met my online friend in Newcastle. 

I showed her around the city, we had a nice time and we planned for me to visit London.

I believe around the end of this month I fucking finally opened up my TEFL courses and started working on them.

April

At the beginning of the month, I finally finished my TEFL course and was awarded a certificate. I can now teach English to people abroad. 

A big victory. this made me realise... I was just heavily procrastinating. I wonder what I could do if I just put my 100% into something, because, Jesus... I think I only put about 50% on most days. 

Towards the end of the month, I visited London. This was the first time I had travelled so far from home by myself. I had an amazing time and saw some great places and id love to go there again.

During May, I successfully went to the gym 10 times. it's not a lot, but it was consistent in the first half of the month. I did abandon it for a few weeks before continuing it again in May. 

May

Conversations with my online friend quickly died after my trip to London. it seemed like we both lacked the interest to spend the money to visit each other again. She had her plans and I wanted to save.

June / July

for these 2 months, I honestly can't think of anything significant that happened. if something did happen then, I'm sorry about that event but.. well... be more eventful.

I continued a somewhat decent activity in the gym but it quickly fell for the coming months. Although I haven't been working out, I haven't gained a considerable amount of weight. I am currently at 76kg so at most that's a 3kg increase.

August

This year my friends didn't forget my birthday. I usually don't celebrate it because my friends are busy. However this year, I went drinking with my friends and stayed over at theirs. 

I got blackout drunk.. that usually doesn't happen. I don't remember leaving the bar and my next memory is vomiting at their house.. so good night I guess. 

September

Another unremarkable month. However, after a few conversations with my friend. I opened my mind to other ways to study languages and took a leaf out of his book and started online classes.

on the 15th, I had my first class with an online teacher. I was super nervous but we have had consistent classes since then and I have noticed some good improvements.

October

erm... well... I'm sure something happened. but other than studying and working. I can't remember or find anything significant that happened this month. Sorry, October.

November

I had been applying for English jobs abroad and got an interview. I was super happy! after the interview, they said to contact them if I didn't hear back within 2 weeks.

I didn't hear back for 2 weeks so I emailed them. they didn't get back to me for over a month. I didn't get the job but they were still looking for something for me as each placement came up.

Not a no, but not a yes either.

December

Christmas! the first one without my grandmother. I have to say, the grief is almost none existent now. Things that remind me of her don't bring tears or make me feel sad. I currently use the unfinished scarf she made me and I feel okay. 

However, I feel like I am struggling to relate to my family's persistent emotions. I believe I kept my emotions to myself to not bother those around me, however, those around me don't try to do the same.

My grandfather and I made the Christmas dinner. the first roast dinner this year and.. fuck it was nice! too many dishes to wash but it was so good.

In regards to my studying, I have been using a website with 1000 words and I got to 420 :D. 

Conclusion

Although there have been some major things this year, I don't feel like I have done many things to warrant a particular month being memorable (for good reasons). a majority of days have been mundane. although unavoidable, next year I want to make each month have something worth remembering.

I swore to myself that I wouldn't let my conversations with my grandma go to waste. And so far, I kept that promise. Not only did I start and keep studying, and finish my qualification, I got lessons, saved up enough, AND I applied for jobs. If I can be proud of anything it should be this.

I have worked for another year at my company. I'm not as bitter or angry now, but I am still resolute in my decision to leave within the next 4 months. I just need something else.

Procrastination. My biggest issue. It almost feels like general disinterest in doing things. even ones I enjoy. Currently, I'm avoiding a game I enjoy because I don't have the time to binge-play 6 hours of it in one day. 

only giving 50% - I don't think I give my all to anything I do. some days I work hard at work, others I give my usual 50%. when I study I get distracted and spend way longer than I need to. 

depressive episodes - I notice when I start feeling down. I become super indecisive, I stop cooking, and finding something to eat is a chore. games are less fun, I stop talking to my friends. it is much easier to just sit and let life pass me by as I stare at my computer screen watching youtube on x2 speed. even the videos I watch I don't care about. All while hating each moment because I know I can do something about it. it's just easier not to.

The resolutions

My resolutions need to be something realistic, tangible, goal orientated and something I can do consistently. Each is to tackle an issue I think I should overcome. 

In no particular order

Read more - This includes audiobooks. In December I started reading the books I own. So I challenge myself to finish them all.

Study every day - there is so much to learn, keep learning. Don't stop. Languages, Coding, Marketing, Streaming, Study something.

Exercise on days off work - working out at home is still a workout. Get it done. Use the walk to the gym to listen to an audiobook.

Stop talking - I feel the need to always be talking about something at work. I don't like silence, so I need to learn to embrace it.

Give my all to things that deserve it - I need to put effort into the things that will enhance my life. Games and tv shows won't. An hour or two per day is enough.

Keep my room clean - Easy, keep it clean

Get to Japan. All this hard work has to lead somewhere.

Don't be harmless - I need to stand up for myself. listen, think, then speak and get your point across. Become an authority figure you would listen to.

Where will I be in 365 days, if I focus on completing each of these goals. I think i'd love the person i'd become.

[1c3312]

12/31/2022

well. it's definitely been a year! i have mixed feelings about 2022, i don't think the year was horrible but it was absolutely not good at all. so much was done but at the same time it feels like nothing was accomplished at the same time, y'know? anyways, here's my year in review.

january: started off pretty shit with that heartbreak, not gonna lie. don't remember much else that happened in january

february: still heartbroken during valentines day but at least we had the cute GSA party. february has also been mostly forgotten

march: did anything important happen in march? SPRING BREAK! omg, the cruise and meeting all of those amazing people and then never seeing them after a week. what an awesome experience! i love that i got to share that time with my family

april: academic hall of fame induction!! losing a best friend over something miniscule. PROM OMG. drank for the first time

may: finishing and graduating high school 27th in my class with academic honors!!!! start of going to a boatload of grad parties, got covid right at the end of the semester

june: more grad parties!! hung out with friends a couple times, smoked for the first time, just kinda hung out

july: even more grad parties! just a lot more hanging out. had my grad party which was super fun!!

august: finally started driving!!! I TURNED 18!!!!!!!! came out to dad!!

september: GOT MY LICENSE!!!! could finally drive and i had a car!!!! started applying for job! had a dennys date w the grippers !! also started my awesome and cool stoner arc

october: I GOT THE JOB??????? first day goes super well, i could definitely see myself working here in the future!

november: lots more working!! have a cute little friendsgiving! also got november employee of the month???? how??

december: crashed my car :( do LOTS AND LOTS of working, friend christmas was so fun <33 got covid right before new years

that was the big parts of my year! lots of awesome days and lots of shit days in between as well. well, onwards into the new year! 2023 is gonna be big for me, i can just feel it

just a few new years resolutions i have: sticking to this daily journaling, starting testosterone and legally changing my name (MAYBE top surgery), coming out to mom and rest of family, picking up at least one new hobby, trying to stick with bass guitar, finally get my dream wardrobe and start dressing how i want to, do a little dabbling in dating, nose pierced 2x and at least one tattoo, hang out with friends so much more often, start working more hours (maybe move up?), smoke out of a bong, + a few more things

and now, the start of daily journaling...

how was today? today was okay!! just a lot of me being sick and sitting in my room. not super productive but i hope that i can start some pretty solid habits in the new year. i've got this!!

todays overall mood: neutral, not bad not good

last nights dream: don't remember

a memory i thought about today: being on the cruise and eating so much ice cream

favorite thing that happened today: dad made fried rice and pulled pork and it was so yummy!

internet drama update: andrew tate getting fucking arrested yesterday FUCKING FINALLY

how much did i smoke today?: probably 7-8 hits throughout the day and i'm bout to have a few more :P

did i work today?: nah bro i have covid rn!

todays weather: cloudy + a little rain. high of 38 low of 33

final day rating: ★★★☆☆