#i mean he could probably tell the hotel oj people about that. though he thinks trophy would be. weird about it

[wheucto]

instead of, like, actually announcing he’s an alien, fan just sprinkles little bread crumbs around so that if someone was actually inanimate insane enough to try and figure it out it can be revealed that way instead

[yamithediaperdork]

Date night (Yu-gi-oh story)

Yugi was excited as he sat in the living room, almost bouncing in place as him and joey hung out.  they were playing video games and killing time till Anzu would be off from dance school. it was a little over 2 years since they had graduated from high school, and while Tristen had enlisted in the army and moved away, the three of them had gotten a place together. Anzu was taking lessons to get better at her dancing and had a sometimes spot as a back up dancer for a few local TV shows, Yugi was milking in the money during tours as the king of games and Joey made some modest income as a bodyguard, mostly working for Yugi himself and getting paid via the promoters who booked Yugi.   they're 2 story house was big but not too big. everyone had their own bedroom even though Yugi and Anzu were dating, and they had a nice laundry room set up on the main floor. it was only if you went down into the basement you might be a little shocked. it was a mixture of a porn dungeon and a nursery, and it was all for the king of games himself who happened to be a massive sissy baby masochist. Anzu was of course his mean dommy mommy (well when they played) and Joey got in on it now and then himself, though always as a dom. (the one time he had tried the diapers, they had leaked and soaked the mattress in the crib) "So Yug, bigggg date night tonight huh? you and Anzu gonna nudge nudge wink wink?" Joey teased, blasting away at a alien on the tv screen. "hehehe well I'm hoping so.. you know we've been waiting for the right time to finally.. ehehe.. but i think this is it." Yugi said. part of his sissy baby fantasy involved being a forced virgin for life, though lately Anzu had been hinting (OK, outright saying) that she wanted to move it to the next level with Yugi, and also kinda wanted him to take a break from being her widdle stinky sissy and be her boyfriend for awhile. "So what cha got planned?" "well i pulled a few strings and got us a table at that new gourmet restaurant, silver platter. then we'll head out to see that new dance movie she's so crazy about, then I have a horse and carriage rented to take us out by the river for a moon light stroll.. with some champagne in the carriage.. then I rented us a hotel room which I've paid the staff to go and place rose petals down, candlelight, the works! er.. no offense, didn't wanna bring her back here if we were gonna knock boots.. don't wanna keep you up all night." Yugi said and had a wide grin on his face. "woooow. you went all out for this huh?" "yeahh and then some. I'm gonna have to do 3 tours back to back to back to cover for all of this, but it's gonna be SO worth it." Yugi said. " Anzu puts up with my well..you know." "Stinky sissy loser side." joey said and smirked, as Yugi blushed and squirmed. "Y-yeah..so i figured a night on the town and showing her I can be the man she wants me to be would be great." "Sounds like it. though..heh.." Joey chuckled softly, and paused the game, looking at yugi with a evil smirk on his face. "..Joey no. i know that look." Yugi said quickly and moved to put his fingers in his ears. Joey grabbed the smaller boys arms and held onto them, and  kept grinning. "what if with all of this amazing stuff planned, you pulled the ultimate sissy baby loser move..and asked to be spanked, diapered, and put to bed in your crib in the basement, while I take your girlfriend out for the night..on your dime." Joey suggested. Yugi tried to block the suggestion out but just picturing it had him making a little tent in his pants. "heck, you could even beg her to NEVER sleep with you, to keep you a -" "Joey stoppp!" Yugi whined, but his voice was taking on it's baby tone. "Loser sissy baby virgin." Joey finished. "ngggh.. you know how mad she would be about that? and I can't just..with everything I paid for all of this.." Yugi huffed, trying to ignore the part of him that wanted to do this idea. "heyyy what if we comprised?" Joey asked. "huh?" "you get spanked, diapered, tied to your crib with a enema in your guts, and I take Anzu out to dinner and the movie, we'll swing back around here, get you cleaned up and you and her can go to the hotel." Joey said. "...you think she'd go for that?" Yugi asked. "welll don't you have a hard time with getting carded at the movies anyways? if the movie is rated anything over G..Plus remember last time you two ate out at a fancy place? they thought you were her son and brought out a booster seat?" Yugi blushed recalling that and fidgeted like crazy. "I mean..i suppose it couldn't HURT to ask her.." Anzu had had a long tiring day, her new dance teacher was a freaking hard ass and nothing anyone did seemed to be right. she was achy and sore but smiled as she thought about the night out Yugi had promised her. Truthfully she was glad he was going all out with this, not that the little sissy loser stuff wasn't fun.. but she was getting a little tired of wiping her boyfriends shitty ass and not even getting plowed in return. 'not that you'd feel Yugi' she reminded herself. Still it was the thought that mattered and worst case she'd picked up a strap-on the little guy could wear. 'at least i won't be spending anther Friday night smelling baby powder and shame, while having to listen to a baby monitor while watching bad movies with joey.' Thinking about hanging out with Joey brought a pang of guilt and a flush to her face, he liked to sit in just his boxers at night and with Anzu on the edge after dealing with Yugi, she couldn't help but stare at Joeys muscles. 'that gym membership me and Yugi got him is SO paying off.' shaking her head she tried to clear those thoughts out of her head. cheating on Yugi would be just sick and wrong. 'though the little pervert would probably thank you and ask for a video.' that nagging voice in her head said. 'shut up you, Yugi is a sweet and cute Lil guy. and he's going to prove that he's more then just some pervert tonight!' Anzu scolded the nagging voice and finally made it back to the house. 'yeah, right.' that lil voice said again, but Anzu pushed it away as she came in. "Hey boys, I'm home!" came Anzu's voice and Yugi gulped nervously. it had been about 15 minutes since Joey had talked him into asking for the diaper humiliation, and to help get Yugi brave enough to ask Joey had poured him two drinks of vodka and orange juice, since he knew OJ went right though Yugi. as Anzu came into the kitchen, Joey polished off his third glass, though he could hold his liquor far better then little Yugi. "..heh..you pre-gaming or something? didn't know we were gonna get smashed before the movie." Anzu said, voice sounding amused but there was a edge to it.. She didn't really like it when Yugi got drunk and mentally groaned seeing the OJ, but tried to keep a bright and chipper face on, as she came over and poured herself a drink. "ehehehe welll seee..er.." Yugi blushed and reached for his drink, as joey smirked and Anzu rolled her eyes. "Do NOT say what I think your going to say Yugi. I'm not spending anther Friday night making you sob in poopie diapers." She said, and slammed her drink back. "welll You'll still get to go out..just er.." Yugi gulped nervously and went to take anther drink, but spilled the last bit out of the cup all down the front of himself. "And dat's why i told ya to use the sippy cup." Joey commented with a smirk, and tossed Yugi a dish towel. "-sigh-  My man.. OK, whats your little idea, and be forewarned, I've had a BAD day so you might wanna think twice about asking for mean mommy mode." Anzu said, narrowing her eyes as Yugi tried to dry himself off, then with a little growl she snagged the towel from him and started to pat him down. "ok soo.. I was thinking.. There's always people who stare when we go out to eat and i always get carded at movies right? sooo I was thinking Joey could take you out to dinner, then the movie, then you swing by here and we tag out. you and me, romantic moonlight carriage ride and then the hotel." Yugi said quickly. 'Uh-huh..and what would you just so happen to be doing while I'm out with joey?" Anzu asked, looking over at joey who had peeled his shirt off and tossed it over, to help. and noticing his 6 pack again, as she tugged Yugi's shirt off and saw basically baby fat. "welll er.. I'm gonna need to sleep this vodka off..and er..the OJ is gonna give me a little bit of the runs.." Yugi said, poking two fingers together and looking nervous. "...So you want me, before going out to eat, on our big date night to diaper you up and tuck you into your crib." anzu said, in a flat tone. "welll yes? and you know..maybe a cute dress.." Yugi said, looking anywhere but at her now. "...I hope you wanted to be spanked first. because even if you didn't your ass is getting spanked." she said then flashed a smile to him., then looked over to joey. "You, go shower, dress nice. not you're take on nice, nice nice." She instructed as Joey smirked and gave a thumbs up. Turning her attention back to Yugi, Anzu grabbed his pants and tugged them down, noticing that Yugi was in a pair of training pants. "...you were of course going to take these off before we went out if i said no right?" she asked, looking at the faded picture of dark magician girl. "and tell me thats the screwdriver soaking them, not.." "Yes and er..no." Yugi said. "...come on little girl, you're in for it." She said and grabbed Yugi by the ear, leading him towards the basement. "Ow! owie owie owie! yesh mommy!' the little twerp whined and whimpered, but the tent in his training undies showed he was in sissy loser heaven. Joey was whistling as he took a quick shower, it was really just too god damn easy sometimes. truthfully, he'd been getting a crush on Anzu for a few months now, and could see just how fed up she was getting with Yugi making her waste weekends changing his shitty diapers. what the little dork needed was a wake up call that Anzu wasn't gonna sit around forever and Joey figured this was the best way to do it (even though Yugi was already taking steps to show he could be more then a big sissy baby, Joey liked his plan better.) besides, she really did deserve someone better then lil Yugi. not that he didn't like him, Yugi was still his best friend..just, it was hard to respect someone who go his rocks off humping teddy bears in pink diapers with a finger of ginger in his ass. What Anzu needed, and Joey was sure she would agree after tonight, was a ride on a real man's dick. heck, she could probably even dump Yugi and just keep babying him and the little freak would thank her. as Joey thought about the look on Yugi's face when/if Anzu dumped him, he had to take a longer shower then he intended to clear out the slices so to speak and not be too eager. While joey was showering upstairs, in the basement Anzu was already switching into her full on mean mommy role. "Your such a little loser Yugi., i can't believe you would rather be spanked and diapered, and shit yourself then go out to a adult restaurant. I bet if we were eating at McDonald's so you could play in the play-area you'd be all for it, though you'd likely still end up crapping yourself." She scolded, leading over to a bench that had soft padding on the top of it, and shackles for the little sissy's ankles and wrists. "Yesh mommy. I'm sorry mommy." Yugi said, breathing fast as he got himself over the bench, belly first, his training pants having been ripped off by Anzu. Anzu came around and secured him to the bench, making sure the shackles were a little tighter then normal and making sissy Yugi whimper softly. "uh mommy, thats a li-" Yugi started to whined and quickly Anzu stuffed his soaked training pants in his mouth. she had rolled them up, but with the pissy/booze soaked side out and that was what pressed on Yugi's tongue as half of it stuck out of his mouth, and the out half gagged him. the Lil sissy mmffh and whined, he was NOT a fan of water sports or gross stuff like that and had made it clear but Anzu just smiled sweetly. "Whats wrong little Yugi? are you not getting what you expected tonight?" she asked, crouching down, stroking his hair. "That's just awful. I wouldn't know anything about getting a unpleasant surprise." she added mockingly, and kissed his forehead. "well if you want that pissy pull up out of your mouth, let mommy know."  Anzu said and smirked, standing up and putting a hand to her ear. she listened to the little loser whimper and mumble around the soaked pull up, knowing it was just making more of the screwdriver and his piss trickle down his throat. "well if your sure." she teased and walked over, wiggling her hips and tapped a finger on her cheek, as she looked over the assortment of paddles on a display shelf, close to the bench. "Hmm what do you think Yugi, something nice and tame, or something that'll have your poor buns begging for mercy?" she asked, running her finger on a plain wooden paddle then over a black leather with small metal studs in it one. It was right about then that Yugi started to see that maybe he should of just gone on the date, and not asked for this. Mommy was acting in a scary way and if Yugi's mouth had been free he'd be saying marshmallow fluff (his safe word) over and over. Sadly all he could do was cry out around the pissy diaper and struggle a little as Anzu picked up the studded paddle. "hmm? whats wrong Yugi? you don't think this will be enough?" She asked, a very evil grin on her face. "Well i could always get the liquid heat and pour it over the paddle. you remember how much that burns and aches for hours~" she said and reached for the bottle. "if you don't want your spanking to burn and ache super bad you better speak up now Princess Yugi." she said and thumbed the cap open and held the paddle out, ready to coat it. Yugi shook his head no and let out muffled screams around his pull up gag, he HATED the liquid heat and it was only suppose to be for when he was in a total pain slut mood! tears dripped down his cheeks and he pleaded with Anzu with his eyes. "Awww, How can I refuse those eyes. I'll make sure to pour lots on for you princess." Anzu chuckled and squirted the bottle over the paddle, coating it nice and thick. With the paddle dripping the liquid heat (which was mixed at a rate of 60 percent water to 40 percent of the stuff, Anzu didn't wanna have to rush Yugi to the ER) Yugi was shaking his head like crazy and she wasn't stupid, she knew he was pleading with her NOT to do this but damn it, maybe the little sissy would think twice before bailing on part of a date with her again. "brace yourself Sissy." She advised and then swung HARD with the paddle, making Yugi's bubble butt almost deform around the force of the blow and the little sissy shrieked in pain. She wasn't anywhere near done yet though, and followed up with a series of rapid blows to the big baby's bubble butt, quickly turning it red as Yugi thrashed and screamed on the bench, and despite it all his little sword was getting stiff even as he suffered. "Hmmm, thats funny..you're cries say 'mommy please stop' while your Lil wiener says 'mommy smack my balls.'" anzu teased and Yugi froze, looking over his shoulder and shaking his head no as much as he could. he had drool leaking down his chin and tears stained his cheeks, and even his nose was running! "awww, who's a scared widdle sissy? you are! yes you are!" she coo'ed and rested the paddle on his buns, coated side down and walked around to the front of the bench, kneeling down and wiping his nose with a rag. "i'm gonna take your gag out, but only if you promise to take it back if i want. do you promise Yugi?" she asked, and yugi whimpered and shut his eyes, nodding his head. "Look at me yugi, open those cute eyes and look mommy in the eyes and nod." she said and tickled his chin. the paddle was burning his poor abused cheeks, but Yugi opened his eyes and nodded, looking at anzu. "OK, then relax your jaw..yup just like that anddd there we go!" She coo'ed, tugging the pull up out and noting the teeth marks in it. "there, i bet that tastes better huh?" she asked. Yugi coughed and gagged a few times, but refrained from spitting then gave out a weak whimpering yes. "now my naughty little sissy loser." anzu coo'ed and stroked his hair. "i have a choice for you. Mommy can spare your cute little balls from a smack from Mr.paddle. but if she does that, then your pissy little pull up goes back in your mouth..or I can dig out a soaking wet diapie out of your diaper pail. " she paused smirked at the face Yugi made at that suggestion. "the diapie will stay in your cute widdle mouth till me and Joey come back by the way. OR.." Yugi gulped, really hoping that he would like the OR option. "Or you can keep your mouth diaper free and take your ball busting like ~snort~ a man."   Yugi groaned, he didn't like either choice but in the end if he had to pick between sucking on a pissy diaper or getting his balls smacked... "Hurry up and chose Lil lady, or mommy will do BOTH." Anzu added, tapping her wrist. "Smack my balls smack my balls smack my balls!" Yugi yelped out, and a spurt of pee hit the cold stone floor of the basement dungeon. (this was exactly why they had refused to put in hardwood or a carpet.) "well if your sure." Anzu teased and kissed Yugi's cheek, licking off the tear trail and got up, grabbing the paddle and making sure to avoid his little puddle. "For the record, you know you're going to be cleaning that up before i put you down for your nap right?" Anzu commented, swinging the paddle a few times and zeroing in her aim. "Y-yesh mommy. I'll get get the mop and be a good widdle maid!" Yugi whimpered, shaking in fear, he KNEW how much this was going to hurt! "Oh, who said anything about a mop.. You'll be LICK it up..unless you want extra smacks on your cute widdle balls." She chuckled, and tapped the paddle on his exposed nuts, the liquid heat mostly off by not but still burning his sensitive little orbs. "No! no no! I'll lick it up mommy!" Yugi wailed and Anzu giggled. "Good girl!" she praised, the drew back and slammed the paddle home. Joey was out of the shower and dried off, in his dress pants and a dress shirt, combing his hair as a ear piercing scream filled the house. "..that..that can't be good." he said to himself but went back to work getting himself ready, praying the neighbors hadn't heard anything.   Yugi came to as finished taping the last of the extra thick, super crinkly pink princess diapers around his hips and smiled sweetly down at the sore sissy. "welcome back to the land of the living. we'll have to start working on your balls more so you build up more of a tolerance." She said and blew Yugi a little kiss. Yugi for his part just groaned but lifted his legs up for Anzu as she grabbed a locking pair of pink plastic panties.  the plastic panties and the diapers together was over kill but yugi himself when they had first started this begged for massive thick diapers that would make him crawl, PLUS loved how warm and uncomfortable all that padding under the plastic pants could get. At least he did normally but after what had just happened he wasn't about to argue with mommy. "I'm glad you woke up though, Mommy needs to finish setting up widdle sissy loser Yugi up to suffer for a few hours so she can go get ready for her night on the town with a real man." She said and snapping the lock on the plastic panties into place, she tickled his tummy. "maybe when we come back for you, I'll take you out with you still all dressed up, you can let everyone see what a little sissy baby you are, wouldn't that be fun?" She added, , turning away now to go and pick a dress for her little wuss. Yugi blushed deeply at that. it was a idea that both excited him but he also knew how DUMB it would be, and struggling to sit up on the changing table he shook his head. "Nooo mommy! No outsies. Dem i can't make money n spoil you." yugi whined, going to slid his thumb in his mouth and realizing just now that his hands were in his pink locking mittens, making them useless. "well i suppose thats a fair point. Maybe we'll save it for anther time." anzu said and winked, coming over with a short pink dress,the skirt portion wouldn't even cover HALF of his massive diaper butt, and the top half had puffy shoulders and a little heart on the chest, with 'sissy loser' written in purple cursive in the heart. this along with his pink booties and mittens, and pink diapers had Yugi feeling like Such a little sissy loser and even as he lifted his arms up to help mommy get the dress on him, he was rocking back and forth in his diapies. with the dress tugged down anzu smirked and then lifted yugi up and down to the floor, pointing over to the puddle of urine that had naturally, gotten bigger. you're gonna go and be mommies good little piss drinker right?" she asked sweetly, then looked over at the paddle then back to Yugi. the message was clear and with his fat diapered bottom wiggling back and forth, and crinkling loudly, Yugi crawled over and leaned down. sticking his touge out a little bit, he dipped it into the puddle and made a face, but a impatient sign from mommy told him to hurry up and yugi closed his eyes. 'just pretend it's a soda thats gone bad.' he thought to himself and started to lap the puddle up. watching Yugi actually slurp up his piss, anzu curled a lip in disgust, she hadn't really been gonna beat his ass again if he hadn't, just scolded him since she wouldn't of had time to get ready if she had to re-diaper him. she would of assumed Yugi knew that but there he was, slurping down his puddle and as he finished, he gave her a weak smile. "T-tastes good mommy." he said. "..well then, if you like it so much, you can drink it more often." anzu said, smiling sweetly and laughing mentally at the look of panic on his face. "Now crawl over to mommy so she can tie you down to your crib and leave you to lay here and think about what a total loser you are, that you'd rather suffer down here in a hot stuffy basement in thick diapers and with a gut full of piss instead of going out with your gorgeous girlfriend." she teased. Yugi gulped but crawled over, and stopped at her feet, reaching up with his arms and she smiled and picked him up, sitting him on her hips and headed for the crib, pausing to look in the mirror in the nursery. "Your SUCH a loser yugi." anzu whispered in his ear. "Maybe me and joey will get drunk and just come home and pass out, leaving you down here, still a virgin.. a big, sissy baby loser virgin." she added and smirked as yugi whimpered, but started to hump her side. getting over to the crib she ploped Yugi down in it, hard on his butt, but the little sissy didn't complain. instead he crawled and laid down in position, making sure his arms were above his head and legs spread,while Anzu double checked the hands free phone system they had installed in the crib. (all teasing and tormenting aside, when they DID go out and left Yugi in the crib, Her and joey liked to make sure he could be safe, so the phone would allow him to call them, or even 911 if needed..though the phone calls were logged and using the phone for anything but a emergency was a HUGE no no.) with the phone working right, she then double checked all the restraints, making sure they were good and tight, and would hold the loser before snapping them on his wrists and ankles, "ok yugi, test time. try and get free." she said, leaning on the crib rail. Yugi nodded and struggled, tugging and twisting and just working himself up into a sweat, but there was NO getting free like that. "Good. now since you liked drinking your piss up so much, I have a special treat for you." anzu said, then left the side of the crib and as Yugi watched her though the crib bars, she opened up his diaper pail, and made a face, waving a hard. "whew! I should be mad you didn't clear this out like i told you, but it works out!" she said, reaching down and grabbing out two VERY soiled diapers, and putting them in the crib. they were far enough away that if yugi didn't fuss too much he shouldn't get his face in them, but the poor widdle sissy would be huffing their reek all night. "oh, I slipped some poopie pills up your bum while you were out. they should be taking affect soon. have a good nap loser, Mommy lovers you!" anzu giggled and waved bye bye to the little sissy. "G-Goodnight kiss?" Yugi whimpered, and puckered up his lips. "after you were slurping up piss? no thanks. " anzu said and walked away laughing, leaving yugi to squirm and whimper, and throb in his pampers. After a quick shower and a change into a evening gown, anzu and joey who looked very dashing in his dress clothes headed out, with her telling him all about what she had done to Yugi. "I kinda feel a little guilty." she admitted. "I really went over board with it today and hope he'll forgive me." "ah come on." joey said, taking a sip of champagne as they rode the limo that Yugi had booked.  "Did he say his safe word at ANY time during all of it?" "well no..but I think he was scared too." "well let me ask you this.. when you were beating on his ass, and making him lick that piss up.. did it feel better then when you normally dom him? making him do stuff he actually hates as punishment for being too much of a sissy baby loser to man up for a full night?" As he spoke Joey moved in closer and then kissed and nibbled on anzu's neck. "J-joey! Uhh.. well.." She paused, an drained her own glass of the bubbly. "It.. it felt awesome..and I was so pissed off at him." She admitted. "and when you told him no kisses, I bet your panties were soaked." Joey added,, pausing from the kissing to refill her glass. "God yes! the look on his stupid little face!" she said, then covered her mouth. "hey, it's ok..admit it..you don't just call him a loser and berate him so he can cream his pissy pampers.. You really do think he's just a diaper filling loser. right?" Joey asked and smirked, a hand reaching out and fondling anzu's tits, giving her the attention that that stupid diaper filling sissy never could and making her feel wanted as a woman..not as a mommy. "Ah..oh fuck.. Joey.." "In fact, i don't think we should go back to the house at all.. do you REALLY wanna let that diaper shitting sissy loser fuck you?" Joey asked, setting his glass down and rubbing her breasts with both hands. "F-Fuck..no..I..I wanna fuck a real man.." She moaned, and then pulled Joey in for a deep kiss, mashing her touge with his. There was a clock in the nursery, close to the crib and it was lit by the nightlight that provided the only light source in the stuffy basment. Yugi had already soaked his diapers and added to the stench to the room, filling out the seat of his diapers with a mushy load that had at first been nice and soothing but after a few hours was making his bum and crotch itchy and uncomfortable. he had drifted off into a uneasy sleep only to wake up when he had turned enough to plant his face in the seat of one of the taped up dirty diapers and had noticed that it was after 11. Joey and anzu should of been back by now, but here he was, still stuck in his crib, still a big loser sissy, and now a stinky one at that. he's give it till midnight before he tried calling them though, and hoped that they were ok, even as a nagging little voice in the back of his head whispered to him. "you know they're not coming back for you.. you lost your one and only chance to have sex so you could wiggle around in poopie pampers. you might as well plant your face back in that shitty diaper and hump your diapers, and try to cum because you KNOW your so called best friend is fucking her rotten." Yugi shut his eyes and tried to block out the voice, to ignore the mental images coming to his mind even as he started to wiggle and air hump his stinky poopie diapies, turning his head and planting his face in the other poopie diapers, as he got close to his climax, the last thought yugi would have before conking back out for a few hours.. was he hoped anzu would keep him a diaper humping virgin forever. the end

[mepencil]

fanfic thing uhhh yeah

Hi guys mepencil here from objectconfessions

This is blog is like an ask/RP sideblog for me and oc-version of mepencil

This fanfic is an introduction to their role in the ii universe

Uhhh tw for Big Asshole Yang Hours, it can be a little iffy for sensitive nb’s bc big misgender hours for plot point

 Paintbrush lay on their front on the mediocre hotel bed, staring listlessly at the little crab that scuttled back and forth on the quilt. They let out a huff, the rush of air surprising their crab friend. “Sorry Baxter,” they sighed. Sure, it was nice to not have the stress of the competition on their back, but they were still afraid. Afraid for Lightbulb, and Test Tube, and...well, Marshmallow was still missing, and apparently Apple had vanished with only a broken window left behind as well, according to the other eliminated contestants.  To be honest, Paintbrush was scared. What if something really bad had happened to them? What if that happened to the others? Or Paintbrush themself?  It certainly was a thought that Paintbrush deserved to be scared of.  Baxter flopped off his feet, making a discontent noise. Paintbrush scooped him up and arranged him in their brush, the place he had seemed to claim and vanish into and out of at inopportune times. Paintbrush was 99% sure that Salt and Pepper were still deathly afraid of the little crustacean.  They sat up and scooted off the bed, deciding that they were hungry. It was late morning, after all, and they hadn’t gone downstairs yet. The upper floors of the hotel were empty and quiet, but Paintbrush could still hear the muffled sound of Salt and Pepper yelling about something, and the bustle of OJ and Cherries in the kitchen. They were surprised the yelling of Yang wasn’t to be heard, but then they saw that the two’s bedroom door was still closed.  Paintbrush made their way to the elevator and pressed the button for ground floor. They muttered an obscenity or two at the horrible music choices of OJ, the sounds of which played softly in the minute-ride to the bottom of the building.  It was always a challenge to maneuver around the morning hustle-and-bustle, but Paintbrush had quickly forged themself a tactic, weaving around the many objects crowding around, expertly keeping their bowl of cereal steady. Trophy frowned at them when his attempt to trip them failed miserably, and they grinned defiantly in his face.  They plopped themself down at an empty chair at the table next to a sniffing Tissues. “How have the new meds been treating you?” they asked him.  Tissue sniffed again. “W-Well, I haben’t been sneezig as much…”  “A relief for you and everyone else,” Painty sighed.  “Sorry…”  “Meh. You couldn’t help it.”  “Thangks…”  Paintbrush shrugged. “Hmph.”  Across the open space a firm knock came at the door. Somehow it was easily heard above the hustle and bustle of the fight for the first at the pancake mix, and everyone paused a moment, even Soap, who was furiously cleaning up after the messier ones.  “...someone gonna get that?” Cherries’ left half asked.  “I will,” Balloon said, hurriedly jumping up from his seat at the table and running towards the door.  A tall cylindrical figure stood outside the hotel, hand on one hip.  They glanced a moment, back at the staring faces of the objects eating breakfast, then smiled. “Heyo!”  “...hi?” Balloon finally said.  “Sorry if I’ve interrupted anything,” the newcomer apologized, then gestured to those in the kitchen. “Do continue!” They turned back to Balloon. “Could I perhaps come inside?”  “Uh.” Balloon looked back towards OJ, who shrugged with a confused look on his face. “Sure.”  They stepped past Balloon into the place and looked around with a smile. “I like it,” they murmured.  OJ made his way past Soap and went to greet the newcomer. “Uh, welcome to Hotel OJ?” he said in confusion.  They turned back to look at him and smiled, They were a good bit taller than he was, and they held out their hand. “Thanks! I’m MePencil.”  He shook it. “Me...Pencil? You wouldn’t happen to be from Meeple, would you?”  “Yeah, easy to tell, ain’t it?” MePencil sighed, looking tired. “Adam wanted someone to...keep an eye on the eliminated contestants. Since, correct me if I’m wrong, Apple vanished, and MePhone ‘n’ Pad are having their own troubles with the contest…”  “They could’ve sent us a warning,” OJ muttered. “We don’t usually get people knocking on our door unless it’s...well, even that doesn’t happen anymore,” he murmured, glancing at Balloon (who had quietly returned to the table, where conversation was starting once more).  “You know how MePhone is,” MePencil shrugged. “Absentminded, to say it...kindly.”  “Well, I guess you’re allowed to stay here then. I’ll see if I can get you a room or something…”  “Just ignore me, it should be like I’m not even here!”  “We’re just starting breakfast...if you can call it that. Do you need to eat, or…?”  MePencil shrugged again. “I eat when I feel like it. Don’t worry about me, I’m like the babysitter that gets paid doing nothing. I’ll try not to bother y’all.”  “Well, I suppose,” OJ said unsurely. “If you need anything, though, just come find me.”  “Gotcha!” MePencil grinned, giving a thumbs-up. “I’ll be around.”

 “So, what do you think of him?” Paper asked.  “Huh?” Paintbrush asked, pulled away from the newspaper.  “MePencil.” Paper gestured to the corner of the room, where said personage was enveloped in a sketchbook. “What do you think?”  “I dunno.”  “I thought she was a girl,” Cherries butted in.  “Oh, don’t go starting this again!” Paper huffed. “He’s a boy. You can tell.”  “Girl. Can tell by the voice!”  “You could ask,” Painty muttered. Both of the objects shook their heads, and Paintbrush snorted. “No wonder you’ve never asked me. Not that I want to be bothered, anyway.”  Paper and Cherries looked a little guilty, but they said nothing.  “MePencil’s ok, though.”

 MePencil had taken to watching cartoons with Soap and Balloon in the mornings, sitting on the right arm of the couch in a debatably precarious position, sketchbook in hand. Sometimes they wrote, sometimes they drew, but it was pretty hard to tell the difference if you weren’t an artist. Or you could snoop on them from behind, but nobody had the courage to do that.  MePencil was, too, different from the other Meeple products. They were nice, sure, but there was something about them that intimidated everyone. Maybe their height. Maybe because they were there to keep everyone out of trouble. Maybe because they had no screen.  They were exuberant. It appeared that they were extroverted, but they normally didn’t speak unless spoken to and was often nowhere to be seen, probably in their room, which OJ had let them stay in.  Not doing a good job of babysitting, then, Paintbrush thought. Lazy.  They didn’t seem to eat much, either. Occasionally they would raid the fridge of its oranges, which no one commented on, but either than that not much.  They also seemed to have a very sarcastic sense of humor. “So, get this,” Nickel said. “When I asked MePencil if he was a boy or a girl, he said ‘I’m not legally obligated to answer that question.’ Like, how much more passive-aggressive can you be??” he complained.  “Not like you didn’t deserve it,” Paintbrush muttered under their breath. “Just deal with it, Nickel. Didn’t mean it to be disrespectful, I’m sure.”  MePencil often butted in on what other people were doing. They didn’t seem to intend to be rude, just curious, but it infuriated Paintbrush to no end. They weren’t sure what the others thought (probably a similar reaction) but they were quite annoyed with it.  “Whatcha drawin’?” MePencil asked, appearing abruptly beside Paintbrush on the hallway bench.  Paintbrush recoiled back in surprise, and MePencil flinched. “Do you mind??” Paintbrush snapped.  “Sorry!!” MePencil exclaimed. “I thought you know I was coming.”  “I was literally looking nowhere in your direction!”  “Sorry, sorry,” they continued. “I just assumed...artist, observant type...should’ve walked in front of you first!!”  Paintbrush snorted. “So you’re saying I’m inobservant.”  “No, no! You were probably just enveloped in your work. Or…” They trailed off and shook their head. “Nevermind. Sorry.”  The other sighed. “I don’t really like showing my work to other people,” they said.  “Oh, no, I get it,” MePencil nodded. “I’m the same way. I just enjoy meeting other artists, you know?”  “...can’t say I’m really too thrilled,” Paintbrush muttered.  “I can leave. Really, I just wanted someone to sit with, and everyone else is busy.”  “You can sit here, but don’t expect me to talk to you.”  “Oh, thank you!” MePencil grinned.  “Mmm. Whatever.” Paintbrush heard a whisper of a breath escape from their guest, a slight sign of...disappointment, perhaps. They chose to ignore it.  After some time MePencil spoke. “Your sketchbook is pretty beat up.”  “So?”  “I guess you’ve had it for a while, then. Surprised you’re not that far through it though.”  “I...don’t really draw that often,” Paintbrush replied hesitantly. “It’s not really a hobby.”  “Ah,” MePencil said, stealing a glance at what was on Painty’s paper. “I see.”  Paintbrush hid their sketchbook indignantly, and MePencil grinned slightly, guiltily. “Sorry to disappoint.”  “I’m not sad about it,” MePencil replied. “As long as we can get along.” They smiled cheerily. “I have many friends who aren’t artistic. It’s ok!”  Paintbrush huffed softly. “I’m perfectly artistic!”  “...that’s...not what I meant,” MePencil muttered, frowning. “But okay…”  “Hmph,” said Paintbrush, temper on the edge. Something about MePencil just set them off. They could feel their hair getting warmer, but they kept their cool in case Baxter had found his way into the bristles. It wasn’t MePencil’s fault that their nosiness had brought out those thoughts. They didn’t know and didn’t need to know.  Paintbrush shouldn’t be so angry.  They never should be, really.  “Yo, Paintbrush?” they heard, and fell out of the trance, looking towards MePencil. “You okay? You spaced out for a minute there…”  “...huh?”  “You kind of froze up,” MePencil said. “Like, you didn’t even blink.”  “Oh, uh. Sorry,” Paintbrush said. “Just thinking.”  “Hmm,” the other frowned, seemingly unconvinced. “About what? You were pretty out there.”  “None of your business,” Painty snapped.  “Okay, okay, I won’t pry,” MePencil nodded, their tone ever serious. “If you ever need to talk though, I’m available.”  Paintbrush stared a good long while at MePencil, surprised at the genuineness they had expressed.  Now there was a different side of any Meeple product.

 Paintbrush never took up MePencil’s offer, despite the fact they did really seem to mean it. They just weren’t ready to say anything. Not yet.

 “All right people, group activity!!” OJ exclaimed, arms up in the air.  Salt and Pepper instantly groaned, and then were consequently elbowed by Pickle and Paper.  “Meep here is st–”  “Ay, ay, no,” MePencil interrupted from the side of the audience. “Please don’t call me Meep!”  “Oh,” OJ said, embarrassed. “Is ‘MePence’ okay?”  “Sure.”  “All right, uh. So MePence here is still feeling left out–don’t think I haven’t noticed, Pence!–and as head of the household, we’re gonna participate in some good-old group activities!” OJ announced. “And don’t complain!” he added, squinting in S&P’s direction.  MePencil smiled at the gesture and shrugged. “Sounds fine to me.”  “I’ve got a list here…” OJ said, looking at said piece of paper, which he obtained from nowhere. “Alright, listen up! We’re all gonna go on a hunt!”  “A hunt for what?” Nickel asked, somehow polite enough to not show his disdain like S&P.  “Everyone go look for the crab! Whoever finds it first gets dibs on the beanbag chair on movie night!”  “Done,” Paintbrush immediately said, procuring Baxter from their hair. “Beanbag chair’s mine.”  Everyone stared at them for a moment, and then S&P started complaining in protest.  “That’s not fair! It’s her crab!” “She just had it right there!” “That was a horrible challenge!” “No wonder he screwed up hosting for MePhone.”  MePencil took one look at Baxter and immediately started crooning over the crab as if it were a puppy. “He’s so cute!” they exclaimed, lifting him out of Painty’s hands.  Paintbrush gave them a look. “You and Lightbulb would get along,” they muttered.  MePence grinned, booping Baxter on his nonexistent nose and immediately getting pinched. “Ow,” they said, but laughed it off, letting Baxter crawl up their arm to their shoulder. “I love animals,” they said to Paintbrush with a smile.  “I can tell.”  “Okay, uhhhh. Paintbrush wins the chair, I guess?” OJ said, a little taken aback by how quickly it’d been won. He hadn’t even said “Go!” yet! “Uh, next thing…I was thinking Truth-or-Dare.”  “That’s childish,” Trophy said.  “But it works,” OJ countered. “This is my hotel, my rules. We’re gonna play Truth-or-Dare.”  Nickel and Trophy both had the largest frowns on their face as OJ organized everyone into a rough circular shape.  Well, more of an ever-fluctuating oval. Not everyone was exactly the most still-sitting.  “Tissues!” OJ said, pointing to said object.  “H-huh?”  “Truth or dare?”  “Oh,” Tissues said. “Uh. T-truth…??”  “Did you take your meds today?” OJ asked.  “Oh, no, I forgot again!!” Tissues exclaimed suddenly, jumping up and hurrying out of the room.  OJ snickered a bit, smiling. “Ok, ok,” he said. “Paper! Truth or dare?”  “Dare!” Paper grinned, looking prepared to do just about anything.  “Eat a corner of your head.”  Paper immediately scowled. “You said the same thing last time!!”  “So?”  “Hmph,” Paper muttered, tearing off a tiny piece of his corner and angrily shoving it into his mouth. “Uh…Nickel.”  “Dare, just get it over with,” Nickel huffed.  “Uh. Sit upside-down for the next three rounds.”  “That works,” sighed Nickel, rolling over onto his head, meticulously balanced. “Hmm...Meep,” he said after an interruption of Tissues returning to the room.  “Truth, and don’t call me Meep,” MePencil said.  “Are you a girl or a boy?” Nickel asked.  MePencil seemed to think for a moment before saying, “No.”  “MePence, you gotta answer the question,” OJ scolded.  “I just did. ‘No’ is my legitimate answer, I’m not even trying to be clever here,” MePencil replied. “Sorry if it disappoints you.”  “That’s even worse than your ‘not legally obligated’ answer from last week,” Nickel scowled. “Is your gender ‘no’? That’s stupid.”  Paintbrush cringed a bit.  MePencil smiled at Nickel, but it was a very dark, irritated smile. “Perhaps you’ll change your mind someday! Okay, Yang!” they called across the circle.  “What??” Yang said, apparently having been MIA.  “She’s asking you truth or dare,” Yin told him.  “I pass!!” Yang frowned, crossing their arms. “You do it, Yin.”  MePencil shrugged, jostling Baxter, who’d made his way onto their head. “Truth or Dare, Yin.”  “I think I’m better off with a Truth,” Yin said, glancing at his darker half.  “Hmm, what’s your favorite food?”  “Well, I quite enjoy milkshakes,” Yin contemplated, “but Yang doesn’t often enjoy when we eat sweet things.” He looked around the room then, thinking of who to call on.  “Paintbrush!!” Yang grinned evilly, suddenly.  “O-oh,” Paintbrush said. “Uh...d-dare?” they decided hesitantly.  Yang’s grin widened, and Yin looked worried. “I dare you to tell us that you’re really a girl!” he said viciously.  “I…!” Paintbrush gasped in surprise, and Yin began to hit his darker half, scolding him. “I can’t–!”  “Yang!” OJ exclaimed angrily. “That was...you can’t just…!”  “I can’t–!” Paintbrush blurted again, stumbling over their words. “I’m not–!”  “So you’re not a girl then?” Yang grinned. “There we go, guys, you’re welcome!”  “But...I’m not...I-I…!!” Paintbrush blabbered, distressed and teary-eyed. They immediately shut their mouth when MePencil laid a hand on their shoulder. They looked to the other in surprise and MePencil smiled at them, winking.  “You don’t have to tell them,” they said. “Yang’s just being unfair.”  “Wh…” Paintbrush said, mind coming to the conclusion. “Wait, you…”  MePencil nodded.  “How long…??”  “It’s easy to tell if you know what you’re looking for,” MePencil smiled.  “Does that mean...are you…?”  MePencil grinned, squeezing Painty’s shoulder. “I’ll pick someone for truth or dare for you, if you don’t want.”  “Wait, what just happened?” Trophy asked.  “Dude, what did you two even just talk about??” Nickel exclaimed, rolling over rightside up again.  “They’ve got their own language,” Soap hypothesized, and MePencil snorted, grinning.  “Paintbrush, are you okay?” OJ cut through the chatter, frowning.  “I think so,” Paintbrush replied unsurely, still shaking a bit. MePencil pat their shoulder.  OJ sighed quietly, then turned to YinYang angrily. “Sorry, Yin,” he began. “Yang, you are denied movie privileges for the next week!”  “It’s ok, I get it,” Yin nodded solemnly.  “What???” Yang exclaimed.  “You went entirely too far!” OJ retorted. “You made Paintbrush cry, and he’s not a person I see crying!” Paper folded his arms and nodded in agreement.  “Yeesh, even I wouldn’t do that,” Trophy muttered.  “Same, same,” Nickel said.  “Dirty move, Yang,” Soap frowned.  “Oh dear,” Balloon muttered.  “I think that’s enough group activity for today,” OJ huffed, standing up. “Remember you get the beanbag chair,” he smiled at Painty hopefully.  “Here, let’s go up to your room,” MePencil said softly as the group awkwardly disbanded, helping Paintbrush up. “Too many rude faces down here.”  “Are you sure you’re gonna be all right?” Cherries came up and asked worriedly. “Yang is such a meanie!”  “I’ll recover,” Paintbrush assured the little ones, managing a smile.

 “I hate that I can’t bring stuff up with everyone else,” Paintbrush vented in the empty elevator. “But they just wouldn’t get it!”  “I know,” MePencil sighed. “Being the third can...be a burden.”  Painty looked to them. “So…’they?’”  “Yep,” MePencil nodded. “Sometimes I like ‘he,’ but never ‘she’.” They smiled to the other. “You ‘they’ too?”  “Yeah.” Paintbrush looked listlessly up at the light that sat in the center of the elevator ceiling. “Only Lightbulb knows, though.”  “And me.”  The elevator door dinged, and as the two stepped out shoulder to shoulder, Paintbrush took into account that all of MePencil’s ‘annoying’ pestering was just...an extended hand for a friend, for someone akin to talk to.  MePencil was a C, and Paintbrush was not alone.

[tyzerman91]

Jealous (William Nylander)

Request: Will you write a Willy Nylander one? Maybe a hot, jealous willy cus wow I need that in my life

A/N: Leafs won. My boys were on point. (Also, I hope this is close to what you wanted. IDK, I was hella distracted by the game.) I could probably write another one of these jealous Nylander ones, I feel like he’s probably very territorial. 

Word Count: 1641

Warnings: Language, mentions of sex.

Up Next: Demers, Matthews, Alex Nylander

William is always so happy. He really gives Mitch a run for who smiles the most. It was probably what drew you to him a little over a year ago. What most people don’t get to see is the other side. The jealous side. This was a side you’d only heard about. Mitch and Auston mentioned it a couple months after William asked you to be official. You’d almost forgotten about.

Almost.

Opening night. You weren’t sure who was more excited for hockey to be back, you or Will. You spent a crazy amount of money to have glass seats. Something you didn’t tell Will about. He would have insisted on paying for the ticket, and you didn’t want him to. So instead you let him believe you would be sitting in the seat provided by the Jet’s for the visiting teams' significant others.

It would have been fine. You had season tickets on the glass at ACC, your brother accompanied you frequently. Will loved being able to see you during warm-ups. Everything would have been fine. But the annoying Jet’s fan sitting in the seat next to you just would not leave you alone.

You don’t know what about your Maple Leaf’s jersey said “talk to me” but apparently it did. You did you best to ignore him. Really you did. You kept your focus on the ice, looking for Will.

You found him. He was doing some stickhandling when he noticed you were down at the glass rather than up where he had expected you to be. The smile on his face got wider. You smiled back.

Bad timing. The annoying Jet’s fan put his hand on your shoulder and leaned in.

“Nylander isn’t even that good.” Your smile fell faster than snow in December. William skated to the glass. His eyes moved from your face to your shoulder. His eyes went hard. He skated away without so much as a wave in your direction. He didn’t come over again.

He scored. It was a beautiful goal. You jumped up and cheered. “Lucky shot.” The guy next to you said. “Why don’t you shut your mouth?” You snap. He smirks and puts a hand on your leg. “Why don’t you make me, babe?” He uses the hand he had on your leg to tap your ass. You see red. You slap him. “Touch me again and break your nose.”

It was the first intermission when he put his hand back on your leg. The time slowly moving up. You turn, pull your fist back and hit him square in the nose just as the players are coming back out.

You stand up and go to the security guard. You explain what happened. The guard nods, tells you to get security next time and follows you back to your seat. His chuckles a bit. “Remind me not to cross a Leafs fan.” He taps the guy on the shoulder. “You need to come with me. We’ll get you to medical, then escorted out of the building.”

You sat down and tried to enjoy the rest of the game. It wasn’t easy, knowing what was probably going through Will’s head.

…

“Willy’s a little, uh…” Auston greets you at the door. “He…” “I know.” You sigh. “Nice hit though. You could play on my line any day.” He makes a joke earning a laugh from you. “Thanks, Matts. But I’ll stick to watching from the safe side of the glass.”

Will walked out of the locker room. You heard Babs telling the boys the plane would leave at 11 the next morning. He didn’t even look at you. He just walked past you. Auston gave you a sad smile.

“Come on (Y/N), you can ride back to the hotel with me.” He takes your bag. “Willy’s just upset. He doesn’t mean anything by it.” “I know. But I wish he’d just let me explain.” You say walking alongside him. “He can’t honestly expect me to never have any interaction with the male gender.” “Well…” Auston gives you a look. “I don’t need your sass, Matthews. Besides, it was a,” You shudder. “Jet’s fan.”

Auston walks you to the hotel room door. He’s across the hall rooming with Mitch. “Good luck.” He hands you your bag then turns and goes into his room. You dig your key out and unlock the door.

“Will?” You call out letting the door shut. He’s sitting on the bed, still in his suit. “Have fun?” He asks, still not looking at you. “Of course, I love watching you play.” You reply sitting down next to him. “Let’s get dinner. I saw a diner across the street. I’m sure they have some good food.”

“Sure.” He stands up and walks to the door. It’s almost like he’s on autopilot. You follow him out, grabbing your purse and the room key.

He puts his hand on your back, walking beside you as you both cross the street. He opens the door to the diner letting you walk in first but still keeping his hand on your back.

“You kids can sit anywhere you like.” The middle-aged waitress said. “I’ll be right over.”

Will leads you to a booth by the window. His hand glued to you. He lets you slide in first and follows you sitting on the same side. His hand goes to your leg. “What do you want to get?” He asks opening a menu for you to share. You’re distracted. The annoying Jet’s fan walks in with what appear to be friends of his. “Babe?” “Breakfast.” You say. “With some OJ. What are you getting?” “Breakfast.” Will replies. He looks up from the menu and notices the group. “Are you kidding me?”

The waitress comes over and Will orders for the both of you. She smiles and walks away.

The guy from the game notices you and motions for his friends to follow him. They sit at a table next to where you and Will are sitting.

You know this isn’t going to end well. You just hope Will doesn’t punch the guy.

“You had a beautiful goal tonight Babe.” You say putting your hand on his shoulder. You can see the group talking among themselves. You can’t hear them, but you are almost certain they’re talking about the game. “I’m proud of you.” “You were supposed to be up in a suite.” He taps your nose. “I wanted to surprise you.” “Well, I was surprised.” He squeezes your leg. “Who was your friend?” “My friend?” You asked confused. You didn’t invite anyone on this trip. “The guy wearing a Jet’s jersey.” Will clarifies. “Has bad taste in hockey teams.” “He isn’t my friend. I don’t even know him.” You say. “Looked like he knew you.” “Well, he doesn’t. He was just an annoying Jet’s fan. You can ask Auston if you don't believe me.” You snap. “I’m just saying.” He defends. “And I’m just saying, green isn’t your color.”

Will drops the subject. You sigh in relief. Your food comes and you begin eating. Will is back to normal. He uses his fork to take some egg off your plate. Immediately making a face. You cover your food in hot sauce something he seems to forget. Soon, you are laughing and enjoying the night.

Then the damn Jet’s fan goes and ruins it. He makes a big show of checking you out. You feel Will stiffen beside you. Will locks eyes with the guy. His face set hard. He holds the stare then without warning turns and full on kisses you. Hand in your hair, arm around your waist pulling you flush against him.

Some of the other people at the table whistle. You blush.

“That could boil water.” Your waitress said setting the bill down. “Now, I’m not in a rush, but you two might be so here's the check whenever you’re ready.”

Will throws down 100 and stands up. He takes your hand helping you out of the booth. He leads you to the table where the group is sitting.

“I’m William. But you probably knew that. This is (Y/N). You probably didn't know that.” He introduces himself. “(Y/N) is my girlfriend. Mine. Now unless you’d like a nice black eye to match that, most likely broken, nose I suggest you keep your eyes, hands, and comments to yourself.”

“Yeah, what are you going to do about it?” He taunts Will, making a show of looking you up and down.

“Tonight, I’m going to go back to the hotel room I share with (Y/N). We’re going to get comfortable and go to bed. Then in the morning, I’m going to wake up next to the most beautiful woman in the world. Then we will get on a plane and go back to Toronto.” Will pauses. “And then, we will go to the apartment we share.” “And then we’ll have hot sex.” You add pulling Will towards the door. The guy reaches out to touch you.

“Didn’t I tell you to keep your hands to yourself?” Will grabs his hand. “Not worth it babe.” You say. “Not worth it at all.”

Will wraps his arm around you and leads you out the door without another word. “You’re more than worth it.” He says in the elevator. “I would have broken his face.” “I know you would have. And then you would have gotten in trouble. This isn’t a game, you weren’t on the ice.” You say wrapping both arms around his neck. “And he isn’t worth that.” “You’re too good for me.” “Nah, I think you’re too good for me.” You shake your head. “I love you.” “And I love you.” You kiss him. “Now I think I was promised something. And I’d like to collect.”