#i mean one literally uses the unmatched power of the sun and the other can spawn black holes

[gabe-lovebot]

no talk me i'm thinking about how minos and sisyphus are like the moon and the sun

[johnnydeppfuckyeah]

Abuse a Man Unjustly, and You Will Make Friends for Him

“Tell the world Johnny, tell them, I Johnny Depp, a man, I’m a victim too of domestic violence… And see how many people believe or side with you.”

A survivor of hellacious abuse, who was falsely accused of being the abuser, has gone above and beyond to prove his innocence. Despite the profuse amount of evidence in his favor he still is not being believed in the court of public opinion. He did everything and more that one would expect from an abused party. Detailed notes in the form of gruesome photographs, video footage, medical records, audio confessions from his abuser, fleeing the area when violence would erupt, sinking into the bowels of depression as those around watched and could do almost nothing to help or stop it.

This man begged for there to be no more violence. He pleaded with his abuser, “there can be no physical violence..” in the audio tape. “Don’t tell me what it feels like to be punched”, as she tried to redefine his words and experience for him. “I lost a finger man..” He reminds her as she chastises him wildly for insinuating he is a victim of anything at all. The first tape is the result of couples therapy according to the accompanying documentation. We also know he was seeking professional help for his addiction issues. He was trying to change and do better for her. Little did he know at the time it would never be enough. There is nothing he could have done that would ever satisfy her lust for violence, nothing that would have made her stop abusing him. In fact he’s lucky to have gotten out when he did because in all likelihood it would have only continued to get worse for him. Amber Heard is a sick individual who lacks self control and thrives on brutality and combativeness. She is only truly living when she is sucking the life out of someone.

She managed to insert her tortuous ways into his opioid detox by withholding medication from him that would send him into spasms. This is an act that easily could have killed him by triggering him to go into cardiac arrest, not that she likely would have cared much if it had. She sought vengeance on him at all times. Her jealousy and envy of him and everything that he’s accomplished, everything that he has, and everything that he is are unmatched. Certainly by anything I’ve ever encountered anyhow. She didn’t just want what he had but I believe she truly want to be him. Right down to the cheekbones. She dressed like him, she mimicked him, she pretended to be interested in his interests. She tried to turn herself into a female version of him and lured him into her villainous talons. A literal siren.

Johnny Depp has several very impactful witness statements but the one that stands out most to me is from Tara Roberts in the Bahamas. She is his property manager there and has known him and his family for over a decade. She talks about watching a man that she knew as jovial, active, and family oriented suddenly resort to sleeping all day and becoming more reclusive. She goes on to describe several events which took place with Amber on the island, one of which sees Johnny fleeing his home on his ATV just to get away from her monstrous behavior. It proves futile as she catches up with him anyhow, continuing to attack and berate him at length. This man was fleeing his own homes to escape her on a regular basis. His security guards attest to this, having to pick him up from the Eastern Building on multiple occasions after a Heard rampage and taking him back to his West Hollywood home. Heard wanted him to stay and take her abuse because it only made her more angry for him to leave. She became enraged because he refused to stay and be her personal punching bag. It’s vomitous that anyone holds this woman up as a pillar of justice for women when in truth she is the voice of abusers everywhere.

She and her supporters try to say his witnesses are unimportant because they’re his employees. Taking into account that there are over forty of them are we really to believe that all these people agreed to be bought off with not a single soul showing conscience? Beyond that not a single soul ratting the others out and turning on them all? To the contrary several of Amber Heard’s friends have pivoted on her. Her interior decorator and friend Laura Divenere submitted a declaration that Amber had never spoken of domestic violence nor did she ever appear injured in Laura’s presence. We have recntly learned that her own personal assistant will be testifying against her in The Sun trial as well. Not one person from Johnny Depp’s camp has flipped sides. Out of all the people he has spent significant time with in his life not one person has stepped up behind Amber’s claims to echo any sentiment of violence. I don’t mean the inaneness that will inevitibly be brought up if I don’t mention — The Mark Hotel incident, the paparazzi incident with Vanessa Paradis, the crew member on City of Lies who was already proven to be a liar multiple times. I’m talking about claims of true personal violence against someone he was romantically involved with. The time was more than ripe after Amber accused him and not one other woman came forward, in fact they all defended him. I find that astonishing in a marvelous way. Character profiles are extremely important here as abusers usually have a pattern over many years. There is one person in this relationship with a pattern of abuse and abusive behavior. Hint: it’s not Johnny Depp. There is also one person here on whom you can easily find distasteful comments about meeting, interacting, and working with. Hint again: it’s not Johnny Depp.

There’s so much here already and I know we, the public, have not even seen a drop in the ocean compared to what Johnny Depp has in his possession and evidence. People aren’t thinking about that though. They see everything that comes out as some kind of diabolical “leak” from his side, designed only to slander Heard in the media. They don’t realize where these leaks come from. In the United States we have the Freedom of Information Act. All of this documentation is available to the public for anyone who cares to go and look. In the UK I understand the laws are a bit different but a member of the press can go and request the records be released to them. Why would he deny it? He has everything to lose by not being 100% open during both of these proceedings. The antithesis to this is anything coming from Heard’s camp. Anything she (or her lawyers) releases is seen as the smoking gun and people seem to forget there are two recordings out where she professes her lunacy to him let alone two trials looming with an exorbitant amount of evidence yet to be revealed. To be clear, what’s come from her side has been feeble attampts at character assassination and pathetic bids to make him a sniveling, mustache twirling, villain more than anything of real value to her case -which she only states she’ll prove, “if necessary.”

Amber Heard has now requested in both the defamation lawsuit in Virginia and The Sun suit in the UK that her evidence be kept private. In the US that request has already been denied along with two attempts to have the case dismissed flat out. She has a third dismissal attempt still pending as of this writing. That just doesn’t sound like someone who wants to prove their claims beyond a reasonable doubt. It sounds like someone who wants to shut the whole thing down by any means necessary because they cannot substantiate what they say. The courts even agreed in 2016, she can never refile these domestic abuse claims against Johnny Depp and she had hired a criminal defense attorney at that time. Does that not sound suspect to anyone else? She’s been subpoenaing irrelevant people, productions, and companies left and right. She also avoided sitting for a deposition like it was the coronavirus. After multiple excuses and delays they finally got her into the room where she threw a nine hour temper tantrum and refused to be questioned under oath. It was ultimately completed and what has come out of it doesn’t look good for her either.

She has contradicted her own stories so many times I don’t even know where to begin. For starters she seems to not remember when she got married or when her honeymoon was. She stated she only ever hit Johnny one time in defense of her “baby sister” whom she suggests he was about to push down the stairs. We now know, thanks to her deposition and audio confessionals, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. She wholly admitted to multiple violent attacks against him along with the throwing of pots, pans, cans, and vases. She admitted to kicking a door into his head while he was hiding from her in a bathroom and proceeding to punch him in the jaw directly after. Other’s have declared they’ve seen her violently assault him, spit on him, throw purses, and heavy TV remotes to name a few. The list is frankly and sadly endless, and when all is said and done I can’t imagine that Amber Heard comes out smelling like anything less than a thousand year old egg. Johnny may never be fully redeemed by all, just look at the reaction to the absurd necromancer text, some genuinely believe a man must be without any fault to be a victim. He will have his day(s) in court and he will prove himself.

Please feel free to look up any of her declarations and filings to verify the information stated here. I don’t often use a ton of citations but that’s because I assume the base of my readers to be people who are intimately familiar with the case already.

Johnny Depp is a very powerful man, just not in the way the media wants you to believe. Although it may not always seem like it, Depp has made friends around the world throughout this ordeal. People who are victims of abuse have flocked to his side after seeing what, to them, seemed like extremely obvious proof that he was the victim. Men have begun speaking up for themselves about violence they have suffered at the hands of their significant others. They no longer feel ashamed or put down because a woman laid hands on them and inflicted injury, sometimes very seriously. If nothing else Johnny should be extremely proud of himself for speaking up. It may well have been the hardest thing he’s ever done in his life and people should take him seriously. He should take pride that he influenced a large number of people to speak out about their own experiences and find catharsis with him in finally letting it out. He should be proud for giving people hope and he should be proud that he survived and continues to thrive and fight for what’s right. I hope that even in his darkest moments, and when he might be feeling most alone, he can find that one little synapse in his mind that reminds him that we are all here for him, and that he has been there for us. Johnny Depp is innocent. Johnny Depp is a survivor. Johnny Depp will have justice and Johnny Depp has already begun to rise from the ashes of this hideous ordeal. May the film offers pour in and the musical fulfilment be never ending. The best is yet to come.

[alphaofdarkness]

not me here for the oc ask ! can't wait to answer the ones you asked me, tomorrow i have my exam and then i shall live again haha ! but now i'll ask you 1, 2, 17, 18, 19, 20 and 31 — i know, it is a lot ( you don't have to do them all 💕) , but i really want to know something more about your wonderful babies and Dany ofc ! I missed her sm during this semi-hiatus 🤧💕💕💕 hope you're doing fine, sending you lots of love 💞💕💘

@carmenio Edgy!! 🥺 so happy to hear from you! ✨ I love these kinds of asks, especially on my many, many OC babies! I hope these answers are good and interesting to thee! I’ll present more info on Dany to some way, some how cause I love her 😭💖

I have gone and included the other questions you asked as well! 🤗 Let’s dive in! 😳

1. Gone and Answered Here ! UwU

2. Do you have a personal favorite among your OCs?

Personal favorite is often shown in the one I draw the most lol, which for a long time was Danielle LWW, but just because she was also my wolfsona at the time. After I made my own personal one I think I went onto Sam for a good while, also eventually going to Dany from Bsd!

So a tie between two beautiful girls, Sam is definitely my favorite LWW Oc, she is just precious and the one I hold the most and most always feel terrible and bad when I put her through it TM. 

Also Dany is my self insert, U//w//U, she has definitely allowed me to slowly self love and allow me to appreciate myself, especially the parts of me I didn’t think to much about or consider so appealing, I think? She has definitely been changing gradually into more of myself since I first came up with her almost 2 years ago! Watch me slowly knock her down to my height of 4′9″, let her have her 3 inches for another year maybe lol.

My dearest Atsushi agrees lol ✨🐯

17. Any OC OTPs? 

👀 lol yesss~ so many and so many crack ships too, which I'll answer next 😂

I’ll just go on and list them off, plenty more of them but~:

DanyJay

SoraYama

LidiaTom

AlikLucy

IsabelleKayla

AlexanderIsabelle

DarkwolfmonJatomon

JatamonRaiwolfmon

EarthamonHounmon

HumaamonWolverimon

And lastly TakaSam is the one I have definitely drawn and thought of the most! They are the top OTP and just best trope of Childhood Friends to Lovers trope, also filling in that trope of Oblivious to both of them but everyone else 🙄. While SoraYama may have been the OG Couple in my story, my love and warmth for TakaSam is unmatched TwT.

It is wild cause I always draw anguish between them as could-have-been-lovers-had-it-not-been-for-death, but recently been drawing them purely happy and content. Total sweethearts, the love everyone wants, excluding possibility of being old friends or not!

18. Any OC crackships?

L o l, I never seem to focus on the main couples because of this specific thing.

I’ll again just go off in list an maybe add a trope or something to get an idea of them:

DanyYama: Rivals, Constantly arguing, and can be petty as heck, but oh the potential and just possibility of opening up after the traumaTM 👀 also the couple that is always in your face about being in a relationship.

DanySora: Sparing partners, the sass and stubbornness, BiPan solidarity 👀

DanyLidia: Pure, wholesome, best friends and so much hugging and lifting from the tol to smol, the nature love vibes

SamJay: Wholesome, soft, healing together from traumaTM, protectiveness, also their Digimon were lovers and married in their previous life, what does that make us? 😳

SamDany: Mostly sibling-like relationship, but damn they have that Sun and Moon tropes?! How can you not possibly ship them!

SamLula: Shy and Confident, Bisexual/Lesbian solidarity 💕✨

JaySora: Opposite of the DanyYama tropes, why are our partners constantly arguing, can they please stop, pure and soft together.

DanyTaka: Digimon Au specifically, Oh you and I are the voice of the revolution? We are rallying up the troops together? Oh boi my Digimon feels love for yours, am I falling for you or are we falling together? Depression buddies but also each others hope and spirit boost ;;w;;

Any of the Warriors with the Sins: A whole lo t of mess, and just not healthy ... but I can already seen fandom people sayin g otherwise~

LustWrath: Spicy, no strings attached kind of deal.

WrathEnvy: ...Oof um, not healthy, kind of manipulative, we are devils there is nothing but toxic vibes.

PrideWrath: Rulers, King and Queen vibes, Yeah we are toxic for each other, f*** off.

19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why)

Definitely Darkwolfmon! I am sure I explained in the first question why, but again I consider her to be that other half of me, the part of me I never discovered or the parts that essentially fill in the gaps within me. She is my precious partner Digimon and has honestly come a long, long way since I first created her. I believe sometime in 2009-2010, so almost 11-12 years since. She was the first ever OC of mine and is one I hold closest too in my heart.

For the longest time, even too now, I have always wanted her to just manifest at my side. Go on this journey of life together. While she might not be physically here like my child-self would want, she is still in my stories, my imagination, my inspirational drive. I think that is definitely more than enough, I don't know where or who I would be without having created her. I probably wouldn’t have a whole tale of OC’s and stories to tell if it wasn't for her. 

I am more than grateful and thankful that I am who I am because of this lovely Oc of mine. I can only hope to have her at my side for the rest of my days!

20. Do any of your OCs sing? If they sing, care to share more details (headcanon voice, what kind of songs they like etc)?

Most, if not all, my OC’s can sing! Their voices and tones vary, to which I cannot give a straight answer on how I headcanon most of their voices right now ^^; I will say that Danielle has a British accent to her voice as well as Spanish speak, and Sora has a Russian accent to her voice, so may be just lightly deep, but not to much.

I will definitely go with my Bsd Oc/Self Insert Danielle Mika Mason, however! Because I have gone and done a thing on how she would speak in her Japanese and English Dub! Other than me also being her voice, her Japanese VA would be Yui Ishikawa, same VA of the queen herself, Mikasa 💕 English VA would be Barrett Wilbert Weed, with an English accent, good Veronica from the Heathers! You can have a listen to her here in this post! 

Dany is meek when it comes to her singing, she will often be caught humming and softly singing something, but quickly tends to stop around others. She is often back and forth with how she sounds and often shuts down when she hears someone she considers better than her. She just needs some encouragement and a gentle push from someone she really cares about. When she does feel the push and genuineness from someone she will sing her heart out. But of course prefers to sing for only that one special person~ can ya guess~ 🐯

31.  Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really).

Oh boi! I literally have moodboards to add to this! I pick Samantha, or Sam! 

She would totes have a Tumblr blog, and Instagram! You always look forward to see what she post and just feel an instant calmness and warmth when you see it! She is always tagging her things appropriately, a soft and warm spring like layout that is shades of yellows, golds, orange, white; an occasional blue and teal as well! She would reblog anything of her aesthetic, golds, yellows, dance and ballet related things (may even post videos or poses of herself in practice and dance related things), cafe shops, sweets and desserts, warm night lights, cats, lots and lots of cats and felines of all shapes and sizes! Her best friend/boyfriend, Takaru always cameos in her stories and posts 💖

She would also reblog or spread awareness of any issues happening in the world, marking them and making her own voice heard as well. In spur moments, you may see her not tag things, but will likely go back to name things accordingly. She would also reblog anything of Bi Pride too!

28. Your most dangerous OC? 

Hmmm,,, my most dangerous Oc, I am taking the notion that they are just plain dangerous and likely of evil intent in their actions. Because plenty of my Oc’s on their own are dangerous in their own right, such as the Legendary Wolf Warriors, who have a great power at their paws. They can be destructive in their actions if they lose control or use it for the wrong intentions, which they wouldn't do of their free will. 

I will say Danielle and Sam are the strongest of the seven, because of their powers of Darkness and Light, respectively. Their souls created the others, so the other Warrior’s power does not match theirs. They can definitely be lethal together if used for the wrong reasons or if they are under the control of a Human or Deadly Sin.

Which leads me to say that the most dangerous of my OC’s with the worst intentions and evil thought processes that makes them dangerous is likely the Deadly Soul Sin Pride, or Mikka Penelope King/Pride as her solid name goes. 

She is definitely the most sinister of the seven sins, even worse than Wrath, who you may figure would be the worst. She has a calculating mind and is very precise in her actions and ways of manipulation. She has a poison within her veins that is just as deadly, capable of blinding others or even killing without remorse or care. While she may be a ghost like entity in my stories, a person/digimon holder in my Digimon College Au, she has enough power to influence people to fall under pride and vanity in the most dangerous level possible, heck even possess them if she wishes. That makes her stronger, as well as the other sins. Does not matter if she is dead or fades away for a while, her influence remains and if it does, than she can exist for a long as she desires.

48. OC who is a perfect cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure

Lol I saw cinnamon roll and instantly had a list of ocs ready, honestly any child OC I have is instantly a cinnamon roll and to good and put for this world, please treat them all kindly!

Current top Oc’s that come to mind are Haruko Mason-Nakajima, along with their nameless sister/pup! They are the sweetest babies ever and love them so much. Too good and pure, especially nameless pup with her love for tigers; she wants to grow up and be like her sibling and papa 🥺🥰  You can see the post on them here!

Next up is my precious flamey boi named Alik Azure Mizuhara! A next gen. LWW, son of Sora and Yamato! A little sightless boi with the softest heart and warmest empathy for others. Very much like his mother in likeness and pure curiosity of the world’s secrets and tales. His father worries for him a lot, but gradually learns to trust in his ability to guide himself. Don’t worry too much about him, he is very smart and knows how to care and guide himself!

Thank you so much for the time and questions you asked me Edgy! I had so much fun with these and gave me a chance to gush about my dearest OC’s! I do hope you find them of interest! 🤗🥺🥰

May your day be beautiful and amazing!! 🥰✨💖

[flowerslut]

hello! random question but i have read a lot of jalice fics lately (love cotn and your new one btw!!) and while i love the whole 'tortured jasper he can feel everyone's thirst bc of his gift' thing, there are some things that i feel like don't really count as emotions so he shouldn't be able to feel them per se (ie: thirst tbh, being lied to, betrayal). haven't read the books for a loooong time so idk if meyer ever went further into detail. but would love to see what u (and whoever else) think!

thank you! I’m glad you like my stories!

unpopular opinion or whatever but I actually don’t like the “Jasper can feel everyone’s thirst” theory. like… at all. it doesn’t make sense. literally. thirst isn’t an emotion.

it’s a cool concept for head canons and fan fictions and all but it makes no sense in canon. I know people use that as an excuse as to why he’s bad at self-control around humans but I personally think we should just leave it at “he’s bad at it because he lived as a murder machine for the better part of a century and consumed so much human blood that humans will only ever look like oversized capri-suns to him”

like, let Jasper have his poor self-control and move on. jasper being the most vampiric of the Cullens makes him a more interesting character in my mind. the idea that he loves his family but still finds them fucking weird just warms my dumb heart.

on the topic of his ability, please strap in because I have so many thoughts about Jasper and his pathokinesis:

I really think Stephenie Meyer could have done a lot more with Jasper’s gift. Jasper could have been so fucking cool. when you think about his ability it really should have no effect on Bella bc she’s this ~crazy powerful shield~ or whatever. but it does. maybe it’s because smeyer didn’t plan Bella’s ability until after twilight (which would make sense and is likely what happened) but it leaves a pretty big hole in the whole “Bella’s mental shield is unmatched in strength!” thing they tried selling. I mean, Alice can see her future, Jasper can sense/control her emotions. impenetrable mental shield my ass? like? hello?

the only way this could make sense in-canon is if we found out that Jasper’s ability was far… scarier then we’ve all been led to believe. I once read someone’s post on here and they were like “what? does he just fiddle their fucking brains until the right neurochemicals are released?” and honestly, yeah, I think that’s kind of what happens. and I know that sounds crazy but LISTEN.

if Jasper’s power is physical, not mental, like smeyer tried explaining, then suddenly we have the scariest character in the entire series on our hands. like, just listen to the potential that that has…

we’re told that the reason Jane can’t inflict her gift on Bella is because Jane only provides you with the illusion of pain. but you still feel it, right? that’s because Jane tricks the brain into thinking it’s on fire, or whatever the experience is supposed to feel like. but again: it’s an illusion. it’s not real. Jane stops and the victim is virtually unharmed, because it’s all in their head, right? if I’m not misremembering, Edward bounces right back in New Moon, right?

the same goes for Alec. and with Aro, since Bella’s shield is mental of course he’d be blocked out. same with Edward. Eleazar can probably sense Bella’s shield because he’s probably seeing it—maybe as an aura, who knows—and I guess Alice can see Bella’s future cause she’s witnessing her physical presence in the future. these all have explanations. if the explanation for Jasper is that he can actually physically effect the brain then suddenly we have an ability that really should also be able to do what Jane and Alec’s abilities do.

I mean can we please talk about how sleepiness/being tired isn’t an emotion. and literally in twilight jasper fucking PUTS BELLA’S WHOLE ASS TO SLEEP??? like??? HELLO?????!

falling asleep isn’t something that solely happens in your brain (as far as I’m aware—anyone proficient in neuroscience is welcome to correct me). it’s a physical process as well because the states of both the brain and body change.

if he can make a human fall asleep, solely by controlling whatever process happens in the brain to, y’know, shut it down for a period, why can’t Jasper do what Alec does? and if he can make a human fall asleep, why wouldn’t he be able to do something on the other end of the spectrum? like, I don’t know, induce some sort of physical injury. something that could cause a heart attack, stroke, or aneurysm.

because if Jasper is physically manipulating people’s brains and bodies then by all means he should be able to control so much more than feelings. I mean, he already is controlling more than emotions and we’re shown that already in TWILIGHT! at the very BEGINNING of the series!!

if he can physically manipulate people, that’s TERRIFYING!! and let’s be real I am HERE for it…

just picture with me real quick a Jasper who (isn’t a dumbass) eventually realizes that, wait… I shouldn’t be able to put humans to sleep or accelerate or decrease heart rates like this because that’s…. completely unrelated to feelings and emotions and um? what???? and suddenly Jasper realizes he has the ability to induce headaches and muscle spasms and cramps not just in humans but in vampires. and suddenly this is a total game changer y’all.

and remember, it’s not a one-way street with his gift. he can sense things too. it starts off with feelings, because those are easiest to sense off of other people. but then he starts being really good at sensing intentions. and then suddenly he’s reacting to what someone’s done before they’ve done it. I could go on all day about how crazy his potential ability could develop in canon and how COOL it is but I’ll just…. stop there…. and let y’all imagine the rest (or add on, if you want to)…..

tldr: jasper’s ability has more to do with actual manipulation of the body and less to do with “controlling emotions” and I’m convinced the motherfucker has the potential to be the actual scariest vampire in the series

[mattzerella-sticks]

A Whole Lotta Love (a Dean/Cas Coda to 14x09 “The Spear”)

With a broken tape deck, Dean and Cas have a long stretch of silence to fill. But just how do they do it? And they say driving helps take your mind off of things... even forget dangling pianos hanging over one's head.

           “You know what would be good right now?”

           Cas glances at Dean from out the corner of his eye, the other man focused, for once, on the road ahead. “Some Zepp,” he says, “I can picture it – us tearing down this open stretch of highway with Immigrant Song playing in the background. Oh! Or maybe Kashmir…”

           “That would be nice, yes,” Cas sighs, “…if our tape deck weren’t broken.”

           “Yeah – yeah…” Dean drums his hands on the wheel. “Y’know, I don’t remember how long it’s been since I’ve driven this long in silence? Not that this isn’t nice. It is. Its just music –“

           “Fills the background,” Cas finishes his thought, “adds layers…depth… security.”

           Dean murmurs his agreement. They drift back into themselves, the tides of their conversation slowly receding from shore. It’s been like that since they left the Bunker. Every so often one of them would start speaking, only to lull back into the quiet. Dean would point out different road signs, crack a joke or two to Cas. And Cas would smile, respond with his own observation; maybe a memory that would have both of them grinning at each other. Enjoying the shared moment.

           “I feel like we haven’t had a lot of this,” Dean says, unprovoked.

           “A lot of what?”

           “This.” Dean circles his finger in the air. “You and me. Shootin’ the breeze instead of demons or vamps or whatever else supernatural creature the world throws at us.”

           “Really?” Cas asks him, “Has it been that long since you and I were… alone?”

           “Yeah,” Dean says, blushing, “Not that I’ve been… counting, or whatever. But between Michael, Jack, and the growing network of hunters it’s hard to just find time to think or… breathe.”

           “Those seem like things you don’t need another person for.”

           “I like having you near when I do those things.”

           “Even breathing?”

           “Even breathing…”

           Cas watches Dean pay the road more attention than he’s ever seen him give it. Like the stretch of asphalt holds all the answers their destination was promised. Its unnerving that he thinks good safety practices as weird behavior, but he misses having Dean’s eyes on him rather than what’s ahead. ‘We’ve had enough luck to not crash so far… I’m sure we can push it a few more times.’

           “Hey Cas?”

           “Yes, Dean.”

           “How was Heaven?” Cas pauses, unsure of how to answer. Dean fills the vacuum with his own drawling ramble. “I mean, you didn’t talk about it much after bringing Jack back and – you said it was in trouble? I know since Gabriel didn’t make it back, stuff up there was running kinda off and – I mean, if you needed to go and make sure… it’s not like I can stop you –“

           “My service to Heaven is over,” he tells him, “I have done… all I could. And I feel I have repaid my debts to the other angels. Naomi told me as such –“

           “Naomi? Ol’ girl’s still kicking?”

           “Apparently it takes more than one old scribe and a rebel angel to kill her.” Cas chuckles, “She has been keeping the peace among all seven of my brothers and sisters that serve under her now.”

           “It’s gotten that bad?” he asks.

           Cas nods. “I don’t know how Heaven might survive. And that might be a problem we deal with later, once our Michael problem is solved.”

           “We?”

           “Of course… Dean,” Cas says, “you didn’t think I would go back, after all this was over. Did you?” The thought stings, but he doesn’t let it fester. ‘Don’t get too far ahead of yourself, Castiel…’

           Dean shakes his head furiously. “No, no I would – not realistically, after all we… but…”

           “But…”

           “It’s stupid…”

           “If it’s causing you this much stress, I assure you it isn’t.”

           “Well, I don’t know,” Dean sighs, grip tightening on the wheel. “Sometimes, I feel like I’m gonna blink and – poof! You’ll disappear. It’s irrational and dumb but it… it sticks. Even though you’ve proven time and time again you’re here to stay and I want to believe it. Except this little part of me thinks it might be… too good to be true, y’know? Kind of why I wanted only us on this I… I needed you here beside me.”

           “Dean I…” ‘When you finally allow the sun to shine on your face… that’s when I’ll collect you.’ “I don’t plan on leaving. Ever. I wish there was something I could do to relieve you of that worry.”

           “I don’t think you ever can but… being here it – it shuts it down.”

           His heart aches, yearns, and reaches out to the other man. But Cas keeps it behind steel walls, ensuring his secret never comes out. ‘It’s for the best… for all of us.’

           “God that was – this is what I mean,” Dean warbles a laugh, rubbing at his eye. “If we had music we wouldn’t – it’s stuffy, isn’t it? Could you roll down – I’m gonna roll mine, I think we need some air, so could you…?” They leave the windows half-up. “Yeah… that’s better.”

           He still looks uncomfortable. Dean shifts continuously. Sliding his hands up and down the wheel, taking one off to lean either on the door or to fiddle with the radio. Cas suggested they turn it on, when Dean discovered the tape deck was broken. “I don’t… it’s not the music I wanted you to hear.”

           Cas understands how much music means to Dean. What it means to probably every person on Earth. Each vibration and note a key that unlocks a part of the soul. And when someone shares music, they’re giving you a chance to know who they are and what they feel.

           Dean handed him the mixtape ages ago. He barely looked Cas in the eye when he did it, muttering all the while. “I know Metatron beamed probably the entire discography of the world into your head but I… figured you might want to hear what good music sounds like for yourself.” Cas enjoyed it immensely. He found himself banging his head to the loud, fast tracks. He crooned along to the power ballads. Even in moments alone, Cas hummed the melody, the words on a loop in his mind as he performed for no one yet also one very special person.

           “You need coolin’… baby I’m not foolin’…” It’s a low whisper, his gravely voice shredding the words in a discordant tone. “I’m gonna send you back to schoolin’…”

           “Way down inside,” Dean joins in, his own voice just as rough to hear, “honey you need it.” He finally looks away from the road, to Cas, his jaw slack with awe. “I’m gonna give you my love…”

           “I’m gonna give you my love, oh…”

           Together. “Wanna whole lotta love… Wanna whole lotta love…” They’re smiling, infected with the rhythm. As Baby purrs down the highway, Dean and Cas Led Zeppelin’s “Whole Lotta Love” from the top of their lungs, voices echoing into the clear, blue sky. At some points, Dean forces Cas to play the air guitar. And he does, indifferent to how ridiculous he might look. Their singing mixes with laughter, and near the end the melody gets lost in the shuffle.

           Gasping for breath, Dean glances at Cas one more time before returning his gaze on the road. “What made you pick that song?”

           “I… I don’t know,” Cas confesses, “When I would listen to your… your mixtape I wound it back time and time again – just to that song. I think it’s my favorite.”

           “Not Stairway to Heaven?”

           Cas chuckles. “No this one… means more to me.” He finds something to distract himself, fiddling with the map in hand. Cas checks a passing road sign. “I think we’re coming up on the turn… you might want to switch lanes.”

           “Yeah, yeah…” Dean turns the wheel, Baby cruising over onto the right-most lane. They make it off the highway, closing the last couple of miles between them and the Spear. “Hey, Cas?”

           “Yes, Dean?”

           “That song means a lot to me, too. I’m glad you… appreciate it, same as me. S’why I put it at the end; kinda… ties it all together, in a way.” His neck is on fire, the red blush creeping up from behind his collar with unmatched speed. “I think we’re here… sheesh, what a dump.”

           “Well, it’s quite literally a dump, Dean.”

           “I know but you’d think she’d clean up since we’re paying her a house call and all.”

           “…She doesn’t know that we’re coming. It’s the element of surprise?”

           “Cas,” Dean says, his voice tinged with exasperation and something else, “…keep being you.” He drives Baby between two tall stacks of crushed aluminum and plastic. “Roll the windows back up, don’t want any stench messing up our ride.” Cas does so as Dean parks. He readies to leave, but something drapes over his hand, stalling him.

           “Hey, Cas…”

           “…Yes, Dean?”

           “I – um, I don’t know,” he rubs at his neck with his other hand, looking at Cas through his lashes. “I mean, I do know – it’s just…” Dean laughs, smile stretched wide across his face.

           The sight parts the clouds within Cas’s mind, and he feels a flicker of warmth burning inside his chest. “What?”

           “I think maybe I can get this out but… just give me a minute?” he asks, “There’s… a lot going on in my head.” Cas allows him to gather his thoughts, eyes never straying from his face.

           Except there’s a slight buzzing to his left, like a gnat flying to close to his ear. Cas turns to see what it is and –

           Duma stands a few feet away. Except it’s not Duma, it’s the Empty. They watch them, face etched in a cannibalistic grin. Behind them swirls a dark energy, a mass of shadowy tendrils swaying, as if ready to strike.

           The clouds roll back in.

           And Cas pulls away. “Maybe later,” he apologizes, “Dark Kaia might know that we’re here and… move. From what you’ve told me she can be very tricky.” Dean’s expression changes in an instant, and even though he tries to cover it up, Cas could see the flicker of disappointment flashing behind his eyes. As if Cas chopped down a tree in his emerald forest that took ages to grow.

           “Yeah… yeah.”

           Cas swings the door open, stepping out into the waste yard. Dean follows at a slower pace, head down, already readying the bag of weapons they brought with them. He watches the other man, pain and sadness welling inside of him, because of what he had to do. ‘Not now… I can’t – I can never…’ He slams the door. ‘I may never have it, but Dean deserves it.’

           “You seem good, lately. Happy, even…”

[zirroxas]

So I Found All the Characters With Unique Backstories

Spent some time rooting around in the files to figure out which characters the game actually gave unique background descriptions to. There’s 94 in total. There’s something around 750 historical characters in the game, but only these comes with unique backstories. 

Some of them are quite hilarious. 

cai mao  -- Competent Sailor  -- "Cai Mao is adept of naval combat, and a budding admiral." cao ang  -- Prince Min  -- "Cao Ang's fate is to one day be prince of the House of Cao, be it in life or in death." cao cao  -- Strategic Mastermind  -- "The wily Cao Cao sees opportunity in the hardships of others, skewing things to his advantage." cao pi  -- Political Animal  -- "In war, you can only be killed once, but in politics, many times.""""" cao ren  -- Brave Hunter  -- "The skills of a fearless outdoorsman --horse-riding, archery, and hunting --make Cao Ren a valued battlefield ally." chen gong  -- Master Magistrate  -- "Chen Gong knows that even great men are imperfect, and righteousness is often not immediately obvious." cheng pu  -- Bandit Killer  -- 'The General of the Household Who Defeats Bandits' is living proof that bravery can overcome adversity. dian wei  -- Brute of Unmatched Power  -- "Such prowess! This is old Elai again!""""" dong zhuo  -- Cruel Tyrant  -- "Consumed by his hunger for power, Dong Zhuo's despotism knows no bounds." fa zheng  -- Vindictive Strategist  -- "The intelligent and vengeful Fa Zheng should not be crossed, lest you become the target of his deadly schemes." gan ning  -- Pirate of the Bells  -- "Cao Cao may have Zhang Liao, but I have Gan Ning! Thus we are evenly matched.""""" gao gan  -- Loyal Nephew  -- "Ever the rebel, Gao Gan's true allegiances shall only die when he does." gong du  -- Master of the Land  -- "Far from being just a heartless bandit, Gong Du is a principled soldier of honour." gongsun du  -- the Warlike  -- "In war, Gongsun Du does what is required of him; he revels in bloodshed and conquest." gongsun zan  -- The Iron Fist General  -- "Defence of the frontiers requires more than just the resources of a warlord, but also a merciless attitude." guan yu  -- God of War  -- "A famed warrior and righteous slayer of all who dare oppose him, Guan Yu's deification is already assured." guo jia  -- Astute Advisor  -- Guo Jia is a confidant of unparalleled foresight --to ignore his counsel is to invite failure and defeat. han fu  -- Diligent Agriculturalist  -- "Using his ability to manage food supplies with tireless efficiency, Han Fu is a most valuable logistician." han sui  -- Tireless Insurgent  -- "Insurrection is in Han Sui's blood. To him, subservience cannot be permanent." he man  -- The Most Powerful  -- "I am He Man, the devil who shoots across the sky! Who dares challenge me\?""""" he yi  -- Leader of the People  -- "With unwavering faith, He Yi inspires others to follow in his righteous footsteps." hua xiong  -- Fierce Beast  -- "With a head shaped like a leopard's and ape-like shoulders, Hua Xiong's ferocity is matched by his appearance." huang gai  -- Unreadable Warrior  -- His outward demeanour belies his real allegiances --Huang Gai truly is the very definition of inscrutability. huang shao  -- Wielder of the Heavenly Way  -- "All uprisings, no matter how widespread, stand little chance of success without strong leadership." huang zhong  -- of the Ageless Strength  -- "The venerable Huang Zhong, to whom age is just a number, is frequently underestimated in battle." huang zu  -- Ranged Ambusher  -- "Huang Zu likes to start offensives on the front foot, from a safe distance and out of sight." huangfu song  -- Aged General  -- "In the brutal business of war, there is no better teacher than experience." jia long  -- Short-sighted Peacekeeper  -- "Jia Long may dedicate much time to forethought, yet still lacks caution now and then." jia xu  -- The Blade in the Dark  -- Decisions made in secret can have the deadliest outcomes. jiang wei  -- Budding Commander  -- "Known for being an expert general despite his inexperience, Jiang Wei has a precocious talent for war." kong rong  -- Master Scholar  -- "Kong Rong claims descent from the great Confucius himself, attested to by his remarkable wit and scholarly fame." kong zhou  -- Pure Conversationalist  -- "A master at the art of Qingtan, Kong Zhou utilises discussion and debate as a means of intellectual self-improvement." lady sun  -- The Rising Sun  -- "As surely as the sun rises, the Lady will always endeavour to get her way." li ru  -- Vicious Shadow  -- Behind every despot's schemes is the intellect of a consummate strategist. ling tong  -- Daring Errant  -- "For some men, war is a chance to prove one's self and seek adventure." liu bei  -- Virtuous Idealist  -- "Despite having come from modest beginnings, the blood of ancient Han emperors flows through Liu Bei's veins." liu biao  -- Gentleman of the Han  -- "A man seldom ruffled, Liu Biao demonstrates his aristocratic pedigree through stable officiality." liu dai  -- Generous Attendant  -- "In spite of the harsh realities of palace life, Liu Dai conducts himself according to his nature: with kindness and benevolence." liu xie  -- Former Emperor  -- "While no longer leading their people, they still strive to bring peace to the land." liu yan  -- Opportunistic Ruler  -- "Some men just want to watch the world burn, while others use the opportunities placed before them." liu yao  -- Welcoming Magistrate  -- "Liu Yao appears to be a 'yes' man, but is nevertheless known for his staunch incorruptibility." liu yu  -- Prosperous Trader  -- Liu Yu's rapport with foreigners and minorities has enabled him to amass considerable wealth from trade. liu zhang  -- Proponent of Peace  -- "A timid and suspicious noble, Liu Zhang displays a willingness to avoid war, even if that means surrender." lu bu  -- Warrior Without Equal  -- "With unpredictable loyalty and unsurpassed martial skill, Lü Bu is the most dangerous warrior beneath the heavens." lu fan  -- Go Master  -- Go is not just an abstract game of strategy --it is a measure of one's aptitude in tactical forethought. lu meng  -- Late Scholar  -- "Despite becoming literate late on in his career, Lü Meng has proved himself a most able scholar." lu su  -- Charitable Envoy  -- "Ever the philanthropic diplomat, Lu Su's affluence empowers his charitable nature." lu xun  -- Scholar General  -- "Equal parts brains and brawn, Lu Xun can oversee both civil and military matters." ma chao  -- Most-brilliant Warrior  -- "With a complexion like jade and eyes like shooting stars, Ma Chao is a warrior truly brilliant in appearance." ma dai  -- Fraternal Warrior  -- There are few things more important to Ma Dai than bloodline and family. ma teng  -- Protector of the West  -- "Ma Teng may treat his friends well, but he remains merciless with the Han's enemies." mi zhu  -- Dependable Administrator  -- "In these interesting times of fluctuating allegiances, the steadfast loyalty of Mi Zhu can always be relied upon." pang de  -- White Horse General  -- "Pang De is an unrelenting force, whose avowed enemies know they must face him sooner or later." pang tong  -- Fledgling Phoenix  -- "Having risen from the ashes of obscurity, the 'Crown of Learned Men' is an advisor of the highest esteem." pei yuanshao  -- Virtuous Outrider  -- "Whether in charge of brigands or soldiers, one must lead by example, always riding at the head of the host." shi xie  -- King Shi  -- "With his long and distinguished record of sophisticated service, Shi Xie is destined for stately eminence." sima yi  -- Silver Eminence  -- "If you cannot fight, defend. If you cannot defend, flee. If you cannot flee, surrender. If you cannot surrender, die!""""" sun ce  -- The Little Conqueror  -- "Sun Ce has been likened to the warrior-kings of old, with an aptitude for military leadership that belies his youth." sun jian  -- Tiger of Jiangdong  -- "Claiming ancestry with the renowned military strategist Sun Tzu, the fearless Sun Jian has war flowing through his veins." sun qian  -- Upstanding Loyalist  -- Sun Qian's word is an unwavering bond. sun quan  -- Emerald-eyed Administrator  -- "Striking looks and a sturdy frame betokens Sun Quan's great nobility, heroism and longevity." taishi ci  -- of Exceptional Dexterity  -- "From horse-riding to archery, Taishi Ci excels in all manner of physical pursuits." tao qian  -- of the Sincere Jurisdiction  -- "Tao Qian may be a highly influential and ambitious figure, but expansionism is not on his personal agenda." wang lang  -- Ardent Educator  -- "A keen imparter of knowledge, even when it is neither wanted nor welcome." wang xiu  -- The Righteous Hero  -- "Never can it be said that Wang Xiu was ever disloyal, dishonourable or unwilling to come to the aid of those he serves." wei yan  -- Disobedient Tiger  -- "For the distrustful Wei Yan, a violent betrayal always simmers below the surface." wen chou  -- Fierce Firebrand  -- "If only Wen Chou were here, I'd have nothing to fear!""""" xiahou dun  -- Hotheaded Officer  -- Those who know Xiahou Dun know not to get on his bad side. xiahou dun 2  -- The One-eyed Exile  -- "You really don't want to know what he did with his eye after losing it to that arrow...""""" xiahou yuan  -- Maker of Ways  -- "When it comes to military logistics, where there's a will, Xiahou Yuan has a way." xu chu  -- Tiger Fool  -- "Xu Chu is a man of simple thoughts and principles, but an impressive warrior who fights with a bestial rage." xu huang  -- Guardian of the Gates  -- "When assigned to guardianship, Xu Huang is an immovable sentinel, requiring a tremendous effort to bypass." xu shu  -- Disguised Diplomat  -- "His body may be in one place, but his heart is in quite another." xun you  -- Gentleman Attendant  -- "A member of the learned scholar-gentry, Xun You is a profound thinker of great insight." xun yu  -- Hegemon's Aide  -- "Here comes my Zifang!""""" yan liang  -- Valiant Vanguard  -- "A foremost general of considerable military prowess, the gutsy Yan Liang is unmatched among ordinary warriors." yu jin  -- Enforcer of the Law  -- "As an imperious, by-the-book disciplinarian, Yu Jin rules his subordinates with fear and drilled-in obedience." yuan shao  -- Preeminent Commander  -- "Yuan Shao's astuteness, dignity and arrogance are the mark of his ancestors, many of whom served emperors past." yuan shu  -- Ambitious Powermonger  -- Yuan Shu is an ambitious but overconfident individual --time will tell whether such qualities shall trip him or aid his desires. yue jin  -- The Lion of Yangping  -- "What Yue Jin lacks in stature he makes up for in fierceness, fearlessness, and deadliness with his bow." zhang chao  -- Flowing Calligrapher  -- Such graceful skills with ink and brush are the mark a man of great education and scholarly puissance. zhang fei  -- Drunken Brawler  -- "Hold my wine...""""" zhang he  -- Courageous General  -- Zhang He's fearlessness enables him to retain his composure when having to adapt to unfavourable situations. zhang kai  -- Slayer of Tyrants  -- "The unjust rulers of the old regime shall perish.""""" zhang liao  -- The Heavenly Dragon General  -- "The model of professionalism and organisation, Zhang Liao has heavenly leadership skills." zhang lu  -- Celestial Master  -- "Just as water penetrates mountains, Zhang Lu always seeks to overcome hardness by his own accord." zhang yan  -- King of Black Mountain  -- "With his scores of followers, the bandit leader known as 'Flying Swallow' wields the influence of a king." zhang yang  -- Ignored Warlord  -- What is the fate of he who is forsaken and unjustly distrusted by his fellow warlords\? Only heaven knows. zhao yun  -- Light in the Dark  -- "In the darkest times of war, the auras of the most resplendent warriors gleam brightest." zheng jiang  -- Bandit Queen  -- "Hell-bent on plunder, Zheng Jiang goes to unspeakable lengths to obtain her loot." zhou tai  -- Man of Many Scars  -- "His scar-riddled skin is a canvas of stories, telling of countless bloody battles past." zhou yu  -- Melodic Strategist  -- "If there is a mistake in the tune, Zhou Yu will look up.""""" zhuge jin  -- Bookish Scholar  -- "Having studied history and poetry in years past, Zhuge Jin is a man who appreciates scholarship." zhuge liang  -- Sleeping Dragon  -- "A peerless genius and insightful strategist, there are few situations that Zhuge Liang's astute intellect cannot overcome."

[livingston31livingston-blog]

Exercise Recovery Consume alcohol Is actually For You?

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[lovehaswonangelnumbers]

New Post has been published on https://lovehaswonangelnumbers.org/karmic-tools-weekly-forecast-march-17-23-2019/

Karmic Tools Weekly Forecast: March 17 – 23, 2019

Karmic Tools Weekly Forecast: March 17 – 23, 2019

By Kelley M. Beard

The video version of this forecast, as read by Kelly, is available here.

The Karmic Tools Weekly Forecast covers the current planetary transits which affect people in different ways and to various degrees of intensity. Take notice when it is a Personal planet (Sun / Moon / Mercury / Venus / Mars) interacting with a Social (Jupiter/Saturn) or Collective planet (Uranus / Neptune/Pluto). And pay extremely close attention when it is a Social planet interacting with a Collective planet because that means something *big* is brewing that will move large groups of people along their evolutionary paths. Tuning in to the energy and rhythm of the planets can serve as a useful *guide* as you move along your Individual Path. It also helps to understand your place within the context of the larger Social & Collective Story. Below, you will find out how these energies tend to manifest, as well as guidance and direction. 

*NOTE*  There are some days when there are NO CONTACTS (besides the Moon), please note that there are no missing entries, we just list the actual Activations of each week + the day they happen.

Weekly Forecast: March 16 – 23, 2019 

3/17 ~ Mercury Rx (expression) ~sextile~ Mars (passion): (2 of 3: 2/7 ~ 3/17 ~ 5/1) This is a healthy selfish energy (aka self-preservation). Do not hold back this week. If you have a big dream or serious goal you have been working toward, then this is the time that may attract the assistance you need from the Universe. This is definitely a “work” energy, however, it brings with it the caveat that it is best if you work alone on something important to you. No one else is (or ever will be) as dedicated to your goal as YOU will be, nor should you expect them to be. You are now connected to the extra energy it takes to push your goals to the next level, bringing you a sense of accomplishment while outlining the next tasks to be done. Opportunities present themselves all the time, all you have to do is be ready!! If you are given the opportunity to make a presentation, go for it! Your clarity, energy & enthusiasm will be unmatched and that’s what people respond to. Don’t choose this time to be “shy” or doubt that you’re ready – you are definitely ready … otherwise you wouldn’t be here!! One of my favorite sayings is: “At the moment of commitment, the Universe conspires to assist you!” It’s time to decide if you are committed and how truly committed you are, to your own success.

3/20 ~ Mars (energy) ~trine~ Pluto (transformation): This is an active, transformative energy that will help you to change your life in a healthy, positive way. You may have the energy & inclination to make major personal (and permanent) changes to who you are and what you want on a deep Soul level. Because it’s a Trine, it promises more ease than is usually associated with Pluto, and in this case, makes transformation smoother. You may be especially focused on what needs to be done or changed in your life at this time. You will want to take action and the Universe supports that decision, as long as it is righteous and not totally self-serving. This is a good time to get moving, take action regarding your long term goals – and you will be able to create momentum. You may realize some of your recent actions or choices do not necessarily support your deepest drives or desires. As you get in alignment within & without, the results can be miraculous. Be creative ~ be brave!

3/20 ~ Mercury Rx (communication) ~sextile~ Saturn (responsibility): (2 of 3: 2/19 ~ 3/20 ~ 4/7) This energy is really good for being able to objectively see what needs to be changed, fixed or stabilized in your life or environment. One expression of this energy is a tendency toward depression or apathy, but a better expression would be facing what needs to be done and following through on what you have begun. You may feel the need to organize things at home or work, or perhaps take a class or workshop of some sort that will help you attain your current goals. Either way, be focused but not too serious – balance in all things. It’s when you focus on the lack and limitation that you feel overwhelmed and sometimes helpless. That’s not the point of this energy. It’s just time to do some serious thinking, tend to the details, take stock and make changes accordingly.

3/20 ~ LIBRA Super/Full Moon (1 of 2: 3/20 & 4/19): This is the last Full Moon in a series of six that fell at the Zero Point of Possibilities. Can you feel the process that you have been through, personally, over the last 6-months? Can you feel the Universe reshaping, repositioning you to birth a whole new way of living on Earth and relating with other living beings? In order to do that, relate in a whole new way with Life, we’ve undergone quite a rigorous release process over the last 6-months alone. When you ‘shed skins’, you have to know that you are raw & vulnerable as you grown new skin or if it is a new birth of any kind, there is an initial stage of development that immediately follows birth that is the most vital for the health & well-being of the (creative) baby.

When we get two Full Moons in one 28-day lunar cycle, it facilitates what I call the *Lunar FLIP*. For the last 18-months, the Full Moon has been preceding the New Moon. During that time, often we have to finish things before anything new will take root. So reflect on the last year and a half and see if that may be true for you as well. I definitely found that every time I went to start something new, something old and in the way would pop up out of nowhere. Now, for the next 18-months, the New Moon will precede the Full Moon so now we will have to plant seeds and walk by faith. During this time, I usually feel like we have to initiate with many unknowns and proceed to the Full Moon which inevitably reveals something we overlooked, creating an opportunity to clear anything in the way of our New Moon Intentions. There is no right or wrong to this, it is the Moon so we feel it on very subtle levels but what I’ve learned is that most of us have a preference so if you know what the cycle is up to, you can prepare better as well.

As for our two Libra Full Moons, this is giving us two chances to do this deep clearing in the relationship department and honor the annual opportunity to complete things and tie up any loose ends in our relationships, personal, professional or both. That means anything and anyone that you have to relate to on a regular basis has this annual opportunity for renewal on a very deep level. It is a time to notice what is out of balance and take advantage of the initiatory energy of the Spring to clear it out and make space for new relationships and for new ways of relating in general. This one has so much additional power & juice for clearing out old, toxic, imbalanced relationships in a way that is so obvious that it makes it almost effortless to finally let go. You will also be shown the new possibilities for nourishing & supportive, balanced & reciprocal relationships, partnerships & collaborations that are being seeded at this time in your life.

Where is the beauty? fun? joy? supportive, helpful, peaceful people? What nourishes your body? mind? soul? spirit? Think in terms of how that has evolved over the last 6-months, 1-year and over the last 8-years for sure. What you used to be magnetized and attracted to has likely evolved, deepened and/or changed completely from 7-10 years ago. It’s time to do some internal reflection on the lessons & blessings you have gained through all your current relationships. No matter how grueling or treacherous they’ve been, you’ve learned something about your Self and humanity and how peace must be nurtured. Now, the Universe, the planets, Mother Earth herself all support you in stepping up and into NEW ways of being your Self, which automatically shifts how you relate with Others, on every level. Many small Circles and Communities have strong roots and are growing amazing things that will feed us all in the end. Find your inner balance, tap into this Spring Season when physical balance is naturally available and call in more balance & reciprocity in your personal & professional relationships. It’s time to allow more good into your life. Practice with more Light this season.

3/20 ~ SPRING Equinox 2019: Spring Equinox brings the Renewal of Life & Light, Rebirth & Resurrection! There are vital energies & resources that are now more readily available at this time. It’s time to plant seeds and initiate projects that will show promise by Fall Equinox, 6-months from now. Spring brings the first access to literal balance in the new year. Check in with balance, within and around you. We are supported to discover & feel for ourselves, this renewal of Spring. We are coming from a predominantly Internal/Dark/Shadow/Fallow time and returning to an External/Light/Fertile time.

On an Individual level, this is a time to tune-in and honor whatever is stirring within, and positioning for *birth* in the near future. We are living during an incredible convergence of energy & cycles. All is vital, all is necessary, and the time is now ~ as we are deeply supported to seed the intention for Self, as well as Community & Mother Earth.

3/21 ~ Venus (values & priorities) ~square~ Mars (desire & passion): This is your Inner Sacred Feminine & Masculine pushing out of comfort zone and into new territory. It is time to recalibrate how you give & receive, as well as how you BE versus DO. It helps to know the Signs & Elements to consciously choose how to work with this activation. In this case, it is Venus in Aquarius working it out with Mars in Taurus. These are Fixed Signs, so on one hand change is difficult, however, once you do change, it is likely to be permanent. Even for those of us with no Fixed energy in our charts can benefit from this activation as it will help you anchor something real and release something that has run its course in usefulness. It’s time to tune into how you direct your own power, as well as what you magnetize & repel naturally. Anytime Venus & Mars interact, the energy has to do with your relationships, both personal & professional, private or public. Squares create the necessary tension to catalyze action. As an individual, it is time to grow, change and integrate your own values & priorities (Venus) with your own desires & passion (Mars), however, on another level, it can activate sexual energy as that too is the energy of creation. If you are in a happy, healthy relationship, then it is a great energy for you expressing your love in a physical way. However, if your relationship already has tension (especially in the physical realm), then this can be a difficult energy to deal with and the only real solution is open communication and a willingness to compromise, so good luck!

3/21 ~ Venus (relationships) ~sextile~ Jupiter (optimism): This energy expands your relationships, personal or professional, allowing you to gain traction in expressing the Highest vibration that’s possible for that connection. In personal relationships, things are sociable, light & fun. In professional or public relationships, things can go more smoothly as folks are more relaxed & easy-going, upbeat & open to exchanging ideas & concepts. This energy activates our innate optimism and natural positive thinking, so it is a good time to look into expanding your knowledge base in some way that makes you more valuable to the team. You will have both the connection to your instincts and confidence with others that is a winning combination!

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[hermanwatts]

Science Fiction and Fantasy New Releases: 12 September, 2020

Necromancy, tomb-raiding, first contact disasters, and kaiju fill this week’s new releases.

Blood Craft (Black Magic Outlaw #7) – Domino Finn

For some investigations, you get nowhere relying on police.

When the supernatural rears its head in Miami, the sleuthing’s usually up to me, Cisco Suarez, resident necromancer and all-around hard case. All I ask is to kick back in paradise once in a while, spend some quality time with my girl, and maybe even find that special moment to pop the question.

But life doesn’t always play fair, and neither do monsters. Turns out, old grudges die hard. So come after me. Maybe I deserve it. But going after my family crosses the line.

It’s time to stop playing the sitting duck. It’s time to start a hunt of my own. Dressed to the nines and undercover at a silvan wedding, I’ll delve into the literal underworld to make the monsters wish they’d never messed with Cisco Suarez.

And hey, if I’m really lucky, maybe she’ll say yes.

The Carrion Hunter – Woelf Dietrich

The Northern Hemisphere is a toxic wasteland ruined by war between man and alien. It seems impossible for anything to have survived there. Australia and New Zealand remain habitable. But there lies the crisis.

Collected here are eight vignettes, snapshots of life on a dying earth, where humans and aliens co-exist carefully and with suspicion, and fragile alliances are forged only to shatter overnight. 


Originally appearing in the anthologies Interspecies: The Inlari Sagas, A Broken World, and Armistice, Woelf Dietrich’s short stories have now been collected here for the first time and with an introduction by bestselling author Adam Lane Smith who captures the spirit of science fiction beautifully as he unfolds and lay bare the heart of it to show us why we love the genre so much.


Collateral Damage – Adam S. Furman

Destructive Battles Rage Between Hellish Kaiju and Giant Mech Protectors

A desperate father must rescue his son when a deadly kaiju rampages across his city.

When opportunists lurk and buildings crumble around him, the battle might be the least of his worries. Each minute means more destruction, and the clock is ticking.

The first in a new kaiju series where the ordinary collides with the oversized, Collateral Damage is based on a short story of the same title originally published in Broadswords & Blasters Magazine. Experience the first taste of this series with a punch to the gut. Mind the shadows — you could be crushed.

Fortune’s Fool (The Fortune Chronicles #1) – Jeff Boyd

He digs through the past to unearth his future. But will rocketing into the expanse blast him into deadly trouble?

Xenoarchaeologist Mark Fortune just needs one big find to be set for life. Roaming the post-apocalyptic galaxy in search of riches, the pragmatic loner believes he’s finally made the breakthrough of his career when he activates an ancient portal. But when he’s catapulted onto an unknown planet, he’s followed by a revenge-driven skybiker out for his blood.

For the sake of survival, Mark and the motorhead form an uneasy alliance until they can escape the strange and unforgiving world. But the only path back home pits them against a ruthless warlord in a flying space fortress armed with pre-holocaust tech and a horde of killer robots…

Can Mark tear down a dictator before his newest discovery is otherworldly death?

The Human Side (The Rocker War Book 1) – Robert E. Hampson

An asteroid headed toward Earth was not unexpected; multiple asteroids were a different story. And, when the “rock-throwing aliens” finally appeared, the people of Earth had to deal with a new type of war, where an enemy with powerful weapons held the high ground of space.

Dr. Tobias Greene felt guilty over patching up soldiers only to have them return to battle—until learning that his work was essential to the survival of the human race.

Master Sergeant Martin was a combat medic, trying to do his job and save as many as he could.

Lab Technician Kat Smith was forced out of her home and away from friends and family by the alien attacks. Her work was important, but would it be enough?

Jan and Li Janacek were trapped in New Mexico with their son, daughter, and eight other teens. They needed to get home…but home was no longer there.

For Arielle French, the aliens’ arrival was everything she had predicted, until they attacked. Had she misunderstood their motives, or was it all the fault of the humans who failed to behave the way the aliens expected

Technical breakthroughs might allow humans to resist the worst the “Rockers” could throw at them. But even if they could level the battlefield, though, would there be enough time left for Earth to show the Rockers what was really on the Human Side?

The Mortal Blade (The Magelands Eternal Siege #1) – Christopher Mitchell

A city ruled by Gods, a mortal champion, a misfit girl and a disobedient dragon…

Stolen from his home, Corthie Holdfast has arrived in the City of the Eternal Siege as a new Champion.

He must fight alongside the Blades, whose lives are dedicated to the defence of the City against the hordes of monstrous Greenhides; or die at the hands of the Gods who rule.

Maddie Jackdaw, a young Blade, faces her last chance. Thrown out of every unit defending the City, either she takes on a new role, or she will be sent to the Rats, a company of misfits given the perilous tasks beyond the Great Walls.

Her new role, if she takes it, will bring her face to face with her deepest fears, for beneath the walls, in a secret and hidden lair, lies a dragon, imprisoned and waiting…

Necromancy in Nilztiria – D. M. Ritzlin

The world of Nilztiria is an ancient one. Beneath its brilliant crimson sun and demon-haunted moons wondrous treasures lay buried, waiting to be uncovered by intrepid adventurers. Yet peril abounds as well, in the form of nefarious sorcerers, grotesque beasts, and inexplicable phenomena. Among the bold heroes and callous villains of Nilztiria are:

XEDROCH LOOR—A lusty rapscallion, his striving for glittering treasures and the embraces of lovely ladies invariably leads him into danger.

AVOK KUR STORN—A strong-willed, quick-witted barbarian who fears neither man nor demon. He laughs in the face of death!

KRYNMORA—This cruel yet beautiful sorceress thinks nothing of sacrificing human life to appease her demonic patron. She has an affinity for unnatural beasts, including her lover who was once a man!

VRAN THE CHAOS-WARPED—By his sickly green eyes he bears the mark of a sorcerous experiment gone awry, but he was also altered in more dreadful ways…

XAARXOOL THE NECROMANCER—Possessor of powerful artefacts and reams of forgotten lore, his expertise in wizardry is unmatched.

If you crave stories of adventure and wonder with a touch of gallows humor, look no further than these thirteen tales of Nilztiria!

Phenomena – Douglas Phillips

Amelia Charron is a neuroscientist researching brain disorders. She routinely uses astonishing mind-linking technology that allows her to enter the dream world of patients. Each night, Amelia acts as a guide through the bizarre wonderland of the mind – an assisted lucid dream. It’s a technique that reroutes neural pathways to heal the brain, but it’s not without psychological dangers for both the patient and the guide.

Orlando Kwon will do anything to keep the frightening voices at bay. Alien voices, he’s sure, but he has no idea what they are saying. The medical diagnosis: early stage schizophrenia. With his life in tatters, a referral to a specialized neuroscience team might be his last chance.

Amelia is startled by what she sees in her newest patient’s mind. Frightening dreams of an unknown world are accompanied by knowledge the man couldn’t possibly have invented and a language no one has heard. In a race against time, Amelia must uncover the deep implications for her patient, herself, and humankind – before Orlando inserts the final component into a strange device he feels compelled to construct.

Science Fiction and Fantasy New Releases: 12 September, 2020 published first on https://sixchexus.weebly.com/

[dragoncider]

Mer-May Writing

As per my lovely friends prompts, and my newfound desire to write over draw. I present to you.....something.....

Let’s go with..Fish Time!

“The thrill of adventure is something unmatched. The rush of exploration, the wonder of the undiscovered, and especially the fear. But it is not a fear of the unknown, or what could happen, but a fear that the feeling of discovery will fade.”

-Literally no-one

Blake enjoyed his life on the countryside. The sun shone bright, the wind blew fair and a day didn’t go by that didn’t end in the beauty of stargazing. If you pointed to any place in the sky, he would tell you what constellations that area represented, it’s significance to cultures and dozens of other facts. Now, all he can do was describe what it would look like, through the clouds and cacophony of light that surrounded the city.

“The pale plaster palette perforating this perfect palace, projects the pitiful persistence proved by the people that pander for purpose in this… this….” Scratching his head, he shifted his seat and began scanning the nearby thesaurus.

“Populated place?” Chimed his companion from across the bedroom.

He thought for a moment before conceding “I mean, that could work. I guess.”

“Perhaps you could pick a problem less perplexing?”

“Ok, now your just being a showoff”, he retorted to his now closest friend Angelica.

“Well”, she grunted hopping down from the bookshelf next to him. “It’s quite easy when all you know are books”

“Especially if most of them come from poets and other such loudmouths” she added, coming to rest on his shoulder. “It’s just all so much talk, I bet those guys that talk about ‘wonders beyond imagination’ hadn’t even left their mother’s basements to see, I dunno, probably a cat or something”

“I think just about everyone has seen a cat, they’re not that uncommon. Now whales, that was something new and exciting! Only a few crews had actually seen them before and the scale of them. It must’ve been the largest documented creature by then. You have to wonder what…” he continued on, entertaining them with his rambling. In the past few weeks he’s been here, she’s heard this story dozens of times by now. She probably could write her own version of it too, if she could find a way to carry the pen, that is. Blake would probably take it upon himself to scribe every scrutinizing detail for her if she asked, but then she wouldn’t be able to hear the energy that flowed through his words when he spoke of adventure and discovery like this. Shaking herself free from her thoughts, she returned her wandering gaze to Blake only to find him staring out the window again. “You miss it, don’t you?”

“Every day, I just wish there was a way I could show them to you. There’s nothing to make you feel smaller than trying to comprehend the size of the celestial bodies that surround you. All of those places, those worlds, billions and billions of miles away, yet they have the power to make themselves known to beings like us.” His gaze falls slightly as his eyes darken. “Had. They had the power”

Rising from his seat, he migrated to his bed while Angelica fluttered from his shoulder and remained on the chair cross-legged. Staring at her friend’s back as he sulked under the sheets, she pondered his predicament for a few moments. “Would you like to see them again?” He turned to face her, eyes searching for any hint of trickery in her gaze. “I could take you, it wouldn’t be that hard. I’ve always wanted to see the worlds beyond this one, to see the stars, but I was always worried about getting lost among the expanse, drifting among the voi-” “Yes.” He spoke, interrupting her spiraling thoughts. “I would be happy to guide you”

Her face lit up with joy as he reclined in his bed. “Though I’m unsure how exactly a sprite like yourself would be able to create a rocket” “Who said we’d need a rocket?” As words of question began to form, he found them lost as he looked out from his roof, suddenly standing side by side with Angelica. Startled by the rapid change of scenery he caught the once minuscule gaze of his friend and anchored his thoughts on her, keeping himself from panicking further. “Are you ready to travel the stars?” she asked, the wanderlust of her voice filling the air around him as her hands clasped on his shoulders. “Or would you rather speak of palpable pachyderms?” Mirroring his arms on her, he grinned “Propel us to prizes posthaste, princess” With those words, he found himself and her moving upwards, past the bustle of the city and the clouds. As his gaze traveled down to the world below, he watched as their legs (and wings) began to fade and in their place came fins and scales, colored more decadently than any rainbow. It was then he realized they would voyage through the wide and fantastic cosmos before them, seeing new and fantastic things, just as those sailors had done before them, many years ago.

[miki10blog]

The box

It was six o'clock in the afternoon when the decision urged in me. Emotions had taken my mind to a certain level of deep thought, while ideas fluttered in the same way that relations ships catapult reckless acts.

On the table there was a box. I say THE BOX with capital letters because it would be her, neither more nor less, than the container of my heart; an ordinary box, although lined with a motif of flowers that I didn’t really preferred.

I had thought for hours about it and the presence of the object was presented as a possible solution. A reliable escape to a better situation, where feelings would finally stop tormenting me and everything in my life would be appeased. The days, minutes, routine and relationships had begun to weigh me, to the point of taking a definite course of action and whatever to happen would be the fruit of many moments alone, under the effects of meditation.

However, the problem was not the apparent fragility of the box or it’s lining of ugly flowers, but another particular fact. It was related to the previous steps at that time and, of course, involved the role that the box would play in history. That is to say, like any inanimate object, the box was ignorant of the value it would soon acquire for me; much less it was aware that it would be the coffin of my heart.

In the latter case, isn’t it funny how human beings have the ability to 'give value' to things? Although, what is magical in that kind of situation? Why are humans the only animals that possess the peculiar behavior of depositing strong energy in simple objects that don’t even have value of practical utility, such as a holiday memory or a Christmas letter written by a loved one?

Then, I turned on my axis to think about these issues and was soon able to analyze a particular factor: memory; what was so enigmatic about it?

I knew right at that moment that I only possessed feelings thanks to my memory and that without it I would have never acquired the box, much less I would have thought about its usefulness. Neither, I would have entered into the need for the meditation that led me to the worst anguish, as a penetrating poison that changed forever my concept of happiness and that of course changed any idea about the world in general. That world of which I had always been happily served had been dyed by a horrible darkness, drastically annihilating the rejoicing I had felt for the mere fact of living.

The young me thought again about the functionality of the box and tried to exert resistance. Archiving my evils once and for all and getting rid of everything that had hurt me seemed the only remedy, although there would be no way to predict the outcome in any way.

Even so, did I really want that or was I just running away? To veto the emotions inside the box wouldn’t only mean carrying out the action but would also represent the wild outburst of the possibility of feeling. In short, inside the box the feelings would be safe from pain and wounds, although the cutest factor would also be kept forever.

However, I failed to cheer up. The thoughts harmed me in a cruel way and, at the same time, the determination began to expand, because no matter how comfortable the flowered box was, I couldn’t convince myself to permanently seize my emotions.

Was that what I really wanted?

I began to walk around the room gradually as my breathing quickened to indicate a nascent restlessness. Just in that fragment of time my evils had been paralyzed, but not for ever. In effect, if you make the mistake of archiving (or not) your emotions, the results could be even worst and whatever the action, there would be no turning back. It was, without doubt, a matter of life or death.

Soon, the heart began to hit me in the chest to indicate that I was still alive, while my muscles contracted in the face of growing uncertainty. The heart hit and hit like never before and quickly asked me to rethink the situation. Oppositely, the mind didn’t act in an aligned manner and asked for strength to achieve its initial purpose. But me, wanting to end the torture, decided to silence the two to think on my own. The typical mind - heart fight was present in the scene although I was proactive in defending myself from the issue. In the world there had always been similar situations, where you don’t do what dictates the reason but the heart, and vice versa, and always the results ended up being controversial. That's why I was absolutely nervous about the indeterminacy and although I had been sure at the beginning, after several minutes things seemed like a distant photograph.

Then, I recalled the good times with my family and wondered why they made me smile almost magically at any moment. What was there in the memories that just by thinking about them my mood could go from absolute stress to a certain level of rejoicing, even if it were minimal? So, which kind of emotions could be experienced by a person who is truly aware of them?

The young me thought of a world without emotions, and it was in a matter of seconds that I made the only concrete movement. I approached slowly to the table, observed the box carefully and finally took a match to light without even thinking about the action. The anguish and anxiety traveled at that moment through my veins, and then the flame appeared from the tip of the match with the same magnitude of those who discovered the fire for the first time.

The flame showed a new reality, and faithful to the essence of the element 'fire' showed me a certain truth, clearly illuminated. In a nutshell, I helped myself to mentally purify those annoying sounds of mind and heart, to dilute every unnecessary substance in my system and finally make a decision.

Yes, I had to make a decision. All confused thoughts should be ignored to reach it, and because it would be an act I would regret for all eternity (or not), I didn’t have much time to continue debating on the issue.

Or imagine sealing emotions forever without thinking properly? No matter how comfortable the box was, nothing could remedy this situation because to feel is also part of being alive. Whether it’s suffering or happiness, everything that is felt is just the only clear indicator that we are still here and that we still have the strength to fight. For that reason, in spite of the fact that one is living the worst of the moments, there is always a later one, like the famous saying of 'the sun will always rise after the storm'.

The young bellerive began to feel a knot in the stomach because he hadn’t thought coldly about that point and had been driven by the difficulties, without deterring the true intentions.

What was he really wanted, once and for all? Stop feeling forever or just end the temporary bad spell? In the second case, what could be so bad as to motivate him to literally destroy the best part of existence?

There are those who agree that emotional control could lead people to an unmatched level of intelligence, although there are also those who literally claim the opposite, as the case of those who only think of the future against those who think of the now. They truly form as a kind of negative-positive that frames the social world in a complex situation that is powerful for decisions.

On the other hand, emotions involve a rather enigmatic part of our body, since although they can’t be seen they can achieve mood changes and appetite. Think, in that case, about the people who change tremendously from one day to the next due to having experienced a traumatic experience; it can be a mother who loses her children in an accident or a husband who loses the love of his life for those misfortunes of destiny.

In addition, in many occasions 'those who remain' are those who suffer the most in love, like a Romeo that decides to take his own life to find Juliet. But is that possible? Is it possible that there is a place where the souls who end their life on earth will stop? Or simply memories are the culprits that the fondness had become as necessary as breathing or eating?

Therefore, before this mess of assumptions, the young me finally reached the best possible decision and with the match about to be consumed, he moved his hand towards the box and let the fire dominate the cardboard surface. Of course, the box became ashes in a matter of seconds and, with it, the biggest mistake he could have ever made...

I still remember the words of Irene when I was little: 'Errors make us human but at the same time they condemn us'; and that would have been one of those mistakes. The acts driven by emotional discomfort provoke certain behavior that takes us away from overcoming. But will it be that the only condemnation has ever been other than our own human condition? Could it be that we were born to suffer to value everything that has been given to us almost by divine grace?

I remember how I finally figured it out. I approached the ashes and looked at the spot for a long time as if it were the corpse of my own indecision; I observed the coffin of the biggest mistake of my life, and I knew, right in that moment, that I needed to get a bigger box; as much as to house my entire soul.

 Written at the Universidad de Buenos Aires, Facultad de Letras, in 2012

[itsworn]

Redemption Big Red Returns to Conquer Pikes Peak

Even Though it’s a Phoenix-From-the-Ashes story, Don’t Call Big Red a Firebird

It was during HOT ROD Power Tour 2016 that we got the call: “Big Red” had caught fire, but thankfully, RJ Gottlieb was OK. It was less than a week before the team had to be in Colorado Springs for last year’s 2016 Pikes Peak International Hill Climb, when a fuel-system failure torched the Baddest Camaro Ever during testing at Buttonwillow Raceway. The team was devastated, but also counted their blessings on RJ’s good health.

Racing is all about redemption. Whether you’re too late to the finish line, rebuilding after a wreck, or repairing mechanical maladies, the attitude of “never give up, never surrender” is probably the most important tool you can carry. You pick up the pieces, find a solution, and return—failure is not in what happened in the moment, but in doing nothing about it to find a path back to success. That’s why RJ’s core team, which consists of crew chief Dave Ward, engineer Tim Fleenor, lead mechanic Mark Ewing, and engine-builder Larry Mollicone, who along with mechanic Cliff Whetstone, began work immediately on the Big Red Camaro to diagnose the cause of the fire and start the rebuild.

The road to Pikes Peak began after RJ and Big Red set a new personal land-speed best—253.7 mph—at the Mojave Mile in April 2017. From there, the team returned to Hesperia, California, with a breath of fresh air behind them. Nine months of work had started to pay off, and while the road-race conversion took just a few weeks, they were eager to begin testing for Pikes Peak.

Mornings on the mountain are otherworldly, with teams arriving at the gate to Pikes Peak Highway as early as 2 am. Depending on which third of the mountain they’re running in practice, teams arrive at one of three pits, and RJ was required to make all four days of practice as a Pikes rookie.

The mission for Big Red was conservative but confident runs to eke out every bit of seat time RJ could while maintaining the car for Sunday’s run. The catch-22 of Pikes Peak is that while the 12.56-mile course is split into three sections for practice, the risks are all the same: dropping a tire, locking up the brakes, or any number of minor mistakes can escalate very quickly, and gravity doesn’t care what day of the week it is.

Pikes Peak mornings start early—teams are usually fully operational before the sun rises.

Under the broken clouds and starry skies of a Pikes Peak Mountain morning, the team hit the hill with a force. Being the famous “new guys” in town, there’s always a little skepticism from some of the harder-knock racers, but drivers, teams, and spectators routinely saw themselves staring into the deep-red paint of Big Red with awe and respect. Not only does Big Red Camaro look meaty on its gold BBS wheels (no doubt setting the look for decades of Pro Touring ’69s) but the team ran like a well-oiled machine. Within minutes of arrival, Big Red would be up on stands as Mark, Tim, and Cliff began preparing the car for the task at hand.

Engine-builder Larry Mollicone looks over the 555ci big-block while preparing it for the initial cold-start.

Meanwhile, Larry, along with Westech Performance’s Eric Rhee (who joined to tune Big Red’s new Holley Dominator EFI system), would focus on the tight-tolerance, 555ci engine that required some warm oil to be fed from a heated dry-sump reservoir before the initial fire-up. Once warmed up, it’s a short game of “hurry up and wait” until the Pikes Peak safety team finishes their sweeps of the road to look for wet patches, shoo away any wildlife, and double-check weather conditions.

The massive side-exit pipes echo with popcorn thunder through the hill like none other. Pikes is unique in its mechanical symphony: the field is a mixture of production-based, Time Attack cars, miniaturized and liter-bike-powered prototypes, belligerent tube-chassis silhouette cars, space-age EV race cars, and a mixture of open-wheel machines from the banks of Indy to the earlier dirt days of Pikes. The myriad of mechanical soundtracks that escape into the ridges is unmatched, and Big Red’s stands out among them as one of the angriest.

“Big Red” is old school, and that means no ABS.

Practice was delightfully uneventful for RJ and the Big Red team. The only mechanical drama was an afternoon ratio change and clutch swap on Thursday, otherwise Big Red ran like greased lightning. With a solid week behind them, Big Red and RJ just needed to make a clean pass from Devil’s Playground to the Peak to lock in to Sunday’s race. The idea was that the sun would be just a little farther in the sky than the twilight hours, but the reality is that a storm front had moved into the area, and more than half the mountain was engulfed in clouds by 7 am.

“Part of a day like today is how variable the mountain is,” RJ said. “The only thing typical is that you don’t know exactly what you’re going to do for the day. It’s just the reality of Pikes Peak—everything can change in a heartbeat.”

While it’s not unusual to be above the cloud line at Devil’s Playground—some 10,000 feet in elevation—it’s rare to have it climb back up the mountain, chasing racers uphill in a losing battle of visibility. Even stranger was the sheer amount of moisture that began collecting on everything (and everyone). In no time, despite no rain, the road had become slick, as everyone’s jackets, gloves, and facial hair became sopping wet; it wasn’t long before Pikes Peak ended the practice session as Big Red and the rest of the second-run group carefully beelined back down the mountain

Mark Ewing and Dave Ward give RJ Gottlieb his debrief after the fog-fueled run.

But even through the fog, you could see RJ’s excitement—and the team’s relief. A year’s worth of thrashing, preparation, and hard work had nearly paid off. While, yes, the race was still the ultimate victory, you could see the tension release a hair as RJ climbed out of Big Red, encircled by his racing family.

Race day’s sunrise was greeted with the slow crawl of spectators heading up the hill while crew members fought for every last ounce of sleep before the light invaded their compounds of rental cars, tow rigs, and race trailers; of course, Big Red was ready and waiting as others rubbed their bleary eyes.

Pikes Peak’s Dan Skoken gave the heads up: It was time to stage, and the team immediately shifted into action. The engine was fired, the jackstands were pulled, and RJ rechecked his quick-release steering wheel.

The Big Red crew, the massive support team of friends and family, and the gaggle of film crew gave RJ a cloud of support as he inched toward the line.

RJ triple-checks the quick-release lock on his steering wheel.

With the skies clear and the peak in sight, RJ thrusted Big Red into the heart of Pikes Peak, and within a few turns, he was out of sight as the belligerent music of that triple-nickel big-block blared out into the ridges. While Big Red could be sporadically found on the live broadcast, it’s the timing board that draws teams during their driver’s run.

Each section time tells a vague story until the driver sees the peak and can radio down; it’s a game of speculation that’s often more stressful than the whole week leading to that point. Tim, maybe not one for the suspense, simply waited by the official board of times in a folding chair, calm and collected (and maybe taking a nap).

Finally, the number hit: 11:08.357—placing fourth in Pikes Peak Open class. The crew was elated—they had finally accomplished what they set out to do 376 days earlier: conquer the Pikes Peak International Hill Climb. To RJ, it was not only that but also Big Red Camaro has been a part of his life for more than three decades now. That sort of legacy, especially in a competition vehicle, is rare, but it’s one that’s transcended generations. The more you observe the operation, the more you realize how that generational reach is an extension of the people who carry Big Red through this world. Fathers and sons hand off eras in the construction and maintenance.

“You really had to be there to understand what I’m saying, but it’s why I chose this group. This team was there for me every day on, as they say, ‘the hill.’ It really was a ballet of motion,” RJ explained. “If you were there at Devils Playground at 13,000 feet, you really saw a ballet of people behind what’s just a car, an effort, and it’s only become something because of this group here. The car doesn’t become something on its own.”

Big Red’s Multiple Personalities

The front sway bar is relocated lower in the chassis to clear the land-speed 598ci’s Pro Charger F3 or sit higher in the chassis for optimal suspension geometry when using the triple-nickel, 555ci, road-race big-block. For land speed, the chassis uses a parallel four-link for high-speed, straight-line stability; in road racing configuration, the team can quickly swap center chunks in the 9-inch and swap the upper links for a beefy three-link configuration. Inside, the transmission is swapped from a Rossler 4L80E in land-speed configuration to a four-speed manual for road racing. With more than 2,000 hp on tap in the blown 598ci, compared with about 1,000 in the naturally aspirated 555ci, two different exhaust systems are also ready—and the road-race pipes used at Pikes were avalanche-inducing (even in June), side-exit boom-tubes. There are hundreds of small changes to make all those big puzzle pieces fit, but you get the idea—modularity, ease of maintenance, and better performance in a wider variety of racing was the name of the game.

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